# How real is 'bullying' at cons over suits?



## kaeri309 (Mar 4, 2020)

Hi,
I've been wanting to suit at a con (non-furry) for a while, but due to time/money haven't been able to get a proper partial together. I also have health issues and want to test the waters a bit before waiting a couple years and paying out for a head etc, so I was looking at getting one of those maskimal heads and going as a cheap partial.
However, seeing all the hate those heads seem to get online has made me reconsider. I probably wouldn't be taking photos and putting them online, but I genuinely wouldn't be able to handle someone coming up to me IRL and being nasty about it. As well as all the drama about poodling and everything else, I really don't know if I should go ahead with it. Is it just online drama or will people actually comment on it?


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## WitherSDL (Mar 4, 2020)

I've been to two cons, one small and one large.  Saw zero bullying.  Some people showed up fully suited, some just wore cat ears and a tail, others had maskimals and even those weird rubber horse masks.  I think people tend to be more judgy online because its easier to say things to people than it would be to their face.

If you were to get a maskimal I'd suggest finding a way to make it your own... not to avoid bullying but I think it'd be more fun.


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## Keefur (Mar 10, 2020)

I'll tell you my one bullying story.  I was at a gaming convention that had about 2000 attendees.  I got the opportunity to wear my fursuit and did so.  I was swamped with photo requests and probably did over 150 of them in less than an hour.  Anyway, I was taking a break and went to an outdoors garden area where there were a lot of people (about 30) taking smoke breaks.  There were two guys in their mid 30s sitting on a bench.  One of them said in a voice loud enough to make sure that I could hear him, "F***ing Furries, you can't get away from them."
I turned towards them (Still in suit) and said in a really loud voice, so anyone nearby could hear, "Hey guys!  You know I wear this suit to help raise money for charities.  I am a mascot for a cat rescue group, and sometimes I go visit terminally ill children.  Have you guys ever done anything like that?"  To which they replied, "No."  I then responded, "Maybe it's because you're too busy sitting on your fat asses all day playing games." and with that I turned on my heel and left to the applause of the other people who were listening. 

It's rare that people are bullied in fursuit.  If someone does hassle you, either make a snappy retort or just walk away.  If they touch you, it's assault.  You actually would have more of a chance being harrassed by a group of teenagers at a mall than having an incident at a convention.  If you are really worried, take a handler with you.  Oh... I forgot to mention that I have been fursuiting over 11 years and have only had this one incident.


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## FrostHeart (Mar 10, 2020)

Keefur said:


> I'll tell you my one bullying story.  I was at a gaming convention that had about 2000 attendees.  I got the opportunity to wear my fursuit and did so.  I was swamped with photo requests and probably did over 150 of them in less than an hour.  Anyway, I was taking a break and went to an outdoors garden area where there were a lot of people (about 30) taking smoke breaks.  There were two guys in their mid 30s sitting on a bench.  One of them said in a voice loud enough to make sure that I could hear him, "F***ing Furries, you can't get away from them."
> I turned towards them (Still in suit) and said in a really loud voice, so anyone nearby could hear, "Hey guys!  You know I wear this suit to help raise money for charities.  I am a mascot for a cat rescue group, and sometimes I go visit terminally ill children.  Have you guys ever done anything like that?"  To which they replied, "No."  I then responded, "Maybe it's because you're too busy sitting on your fat asses all day playing games." and with that I turned on my heel and left to the applause of the other people who were listening.
> 
> It's rare that people are bullied in fursuit.  If someone does hassle you, either make a snappy retort or just walk away.  If they touch you, it's assault.  You actually would have more of a chance being harrassed by a group of teenagers at a mall than having an incident at a convention.  If you are really worried, take a handler with you.  Oh... I forgot to mention that I have been fursuiting over 11 years and have only had this one incident.


You handled that better than I would have... I'm too poor to afford a full fur suit, but if I could, I'd find a way to make retractable claws just for the chance of bullies. >:3 but knowing that most bullies become tattle tales when they get beaten, I'd probably get thrown back in jail, or charged for assault.


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## Doomer (Mar 10, 2020)

Keefur said:


> "Hey guys! You know I wear this suit to help raise money for charities. I am a mascot for a cat rescue group, and sometimes I go visit terminally ill children. Have you guys ever done anything like that?"



lol cant believe they bought it


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## Keefur (Mar 10, 2020)

Doomer said:


> lol cant believe they bought it


They didn't "buy" anything.  I actually do all those things.  I was an attending Guest of Honor at the gaming convention, but I get your point. lol  It does sound like a lot.


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## Keefur (Mar 10, 2020)

The Fluffy MC (president) said:


> You handled that better than I would have... I'm too poor to afford a full fur suit, but if I could, I'd find a way to make retractable claws just for the chance of bullies. >:3 but knowing that most bullies become tattle tales when they get beaten, I'd probably get thrown back in jail, or charged for assault.


Yeah... You pretty much don't want to lay a paw on them to give them an excuse to have you thrown in jail.  The good part about my fursuit is that the head is made from a kickboxing headgear, so they would probably have to shoot or stab me to really hurt me. lol


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## Doomer (Mar 10, 2020)

Keefur said:


> Yeah... You pretty much don't want to lay a paw on them to give them an excuse to have you thrown in jail.  The good part about my fursuit is that the head is made from a kickboxing headgear, so they would probably have to shoot or stab me to really hurt me. lol



I expected you to say that. I don't like when people do comebacks, it puts them on the level with bullies. I would had just walked away.


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## Mambi (Mar 10, 2020)

Keefur said:


> I'll tell you my one bullying story.  I was at a gaming convention that had about 2000 attendees.  I got the opportunity to wear my fursuit and did so.  I was swamped with photo requests and probably did over 150 of them in less than an hour.  Anyway, I was taking a break and went to an outdoors garden area where there were a lot of people (about 30) taking smoke breaks.  There were two guys in their mid 30s sitting on a bench.  One of them said in a voice loud enough to make sure that I could hear him, "F***ing Furries, you can't get away from them."
> I turned towards them (Still in suit) and said in a really loud voice, so anyone nearby could hear, "Hey guys!  You know I wear this suit to help raise money for charities.  I am a mascot for a cat rescue group, and sometimes I go visit terminally ill children.  Have you guys ever done anything like that?"  To which they replied, "No."  I then responded, "Maybe it's because you're too busy sitting on your fat asses all day playing games." and with that I turned on my heel and left to the applause of the other people who were listening.
> 
> It's rare that people are bullied in fursuit.  If someone does hassle you, either make a snappy retort or just walk away.  If they touch you, it's assault.  You actually would have more of a chance being harrassed by a group of teenagers at a mall than having an incident at a convention.  If you are really worried, take a handler with you.  Oh... I forgot to mention that I have been fursuiting over 11 years and have only had this one incident.



Clap-clap-clap-clap-clap...<the cat wipes a tear from his eye>, that was beautiful! <laughs> Oh I would have loved to be there to see their faces afterwards. <giggle> Handled very well as others said! <bows deeply> 

But yeah, for the most part I find most people at worst think you're weird, but that not even an insult, and bullying pretty much nil. Thankfully! <wipes forehead with his tail> Maybe if they were somehow the anonymous ones like on the internet it would be different, who knows?


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## Deleted member 82554 (Mar 10, 2020)

Keefur said:


> "Hey guys!  You know I wear this suit to help raise money for charities.  I am a mascot for a cat rescue group, and sometimes I go visit terminally ill children.


This just made you so much more cooler.

Regarding the question itself: there have been cases of people bullying those with "lesser" fursuits, ie: onesies, anything low quality but it's not common from my understanding. Granted, I've only been to one furcon and everyone seemed happy and accepting (albeit at times a little cringey), but that's furries for ya. Unpredictable at the worst of times, awesome at the best.


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## Guifrog (Mar 10, 2020)

Mr. Fox said:


> This just made you so much more cooler.
> 
> Regarding the question itself: there have been cases of people bullying those with "lesser" fursuits, ie: onesies, anything low quality but it's not common from my understanding. Granted, I've only been to one furcon and everyone seemed happy and accepting (albeit at times a little cringey), but that's furries for ya. Unpredictable at the worst of times, awesome at the best.


Yeah, I was kinda expecting some to poke fun at my self-sewed frog helmet because of the exposed foam and loose parts. Thankfully, people got positively surprised and even told me my suit was very original instead - apparently I was the first amphibian to ever appear at the con, and the whole suit is spandex based. I can recall members of the staff saying they don't promote costume-related competitions to keep that kind of bullying from stepping up, and to keep the focus on having all-around fun.


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## Mambi (Mar 10, 2020)

Guifrog said:


> I can recall members of the staff saying they don't promote costume-related competitions to keep that kind of bullying from stepping up, and to keep the focus on having all-around fun.



THAT'S a good idea! No need to be more self-conscious, and imagination should be celebrated, not compared to those with more resources.


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## Keefur (Mar 10, 2020)

Mr. Fox said:


> This just made you so much more cooler.
> 
> Regarding the question itself: there have been cases of people bullying those with "lesser" fursuits, ie: onesies, anything low quality but it's not common from my understanding. Granted, I've only been to one furcon and everyone seemed happy and accepting (albeit at times a little cringey), but that's furries for ya. Unpredictable at the worst of times, awesome at the best.



I'm humbled by your response about being cool.  Thank you.

Yes, I have seen fursuiters with obviously home made suits by beginners that were made fun of.  It hurts to see this happen, but you would be amazed by how many other Furries come to the defense of someone who is being picked on because of this.  As a con president, I severely discourage this kind of behavior.  I know that one young girl who was being picked on, was very hurt by this kind of stuff.  I took her aside and in a private conversation (her father was present), I told her what a great job she had done and what courage it took to even wear a fursuit.  I also made a character badge for her as a gift from the con.


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## VX666 (Mar 12, 2020)

One thing I've noticed is that a lot of such gatherings and conventions are in high crime areas, not the attendees but locals may be bad people


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## Vesper2112 (May 21, 2020)

I know this is an older thread, but just wanted to toss my 2 cents in. I've been to a lot of cons (both big and small) and generally the bullying I've seen comes from people not connected to the con. For instance, DragonCon is a large multi-fandom con in Atlanta, GA held over Labor Day. There's also usually a big-time college football game and maybe a NASCAR race happening in the area, so you get some cross-pollination with the fans from all these events. I personally haven't witnessed things, but I've heard about how people who aren't into the things we might be are quick to harass "the nerds". Thankfully (I guess?) the nerd stuff is way more mainstream than it used to be, so while I'm sure it still happens, it's way more safer to be surrounded by "our people" at cons.


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