# Conan: The Barbarian (NEW movie)



## Kellie Gator (Mar 15, 2011)

So I thought I'd have nothing to watch this year and then this thing literally came out of nowhere... well, I did know a movie was being made, but I had no idea it'd show up this year. There hasn't been a lot of promotion or hype over it. The trailer doesn't say much but I think it looks pretty fucking sweet. The new Conan looks more savage and badass than Schwarzenegger, IMO.

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809953260/video/24490513

A new poster was also released. It's pretty cool, and... it's gonna be in 3D? I don't really understand how it'll benefit a movie like this, but I might see it in 3D if I can when it premieres because it's fucking Conan.

Maybe I'm being too hyped up about this, but I just got into Conan and the fact that a new movie trailer came out only two weeks after I bought one of the books kinda gave me a fangirl moment.

So what do you guys think? :V


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## LizardKing (Mar 15, 2011)

Not another fucking "gritty reboot". Not that Conan could get much grittier, but still. Hopefully they won't screw it up as much as Robin Hood. It might even be pretty good; that would be nice.


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## Kellie Gator (Mar 15, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> Not another fucking "gritty reboot". Not that Conan could get much grittier, but still. Hopefully they won't screw it up as much as Robin Hood. It might even be pretty good; that would be nice.


 I dunno. This is kinda how I wanted Conan to be, so I don't mind. But the movie has some other problems that I'm pretty skeptic about. The director hasn't really made anything else than a bunch of horror movie remakes, so I dunno if he can tackle something as big as a Conan movie.

Oh, and from what I can gather, the plot is about how Conan wants to avenge his burned village and murdered parents and ends up on a quest to save the world in the process. If that's true, than this is really just the same fucking movie as the Arnold Schwarzenegger one. Conan did do other things than trying to avenge his family all the time in the original stories by Robert E. Howard, you know. :/

I'm still hyped up, though. I think the world needs more movies like this.


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## Duality Jack (Mar 15, 2011)

Worth a shot. I'd see it.


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## LizardKing (Mar 15, 2011)

Kellie Gator said:


> Oh, and from what I can gather, the plot is about how Conan wants to avenge his burned village and murdered parents



I bet he's all angsty and broody and sometimes his hair falls in front of his face and covers one eye like a goddamn emo.

HGGGNNNNNN. Please no.


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## Duality Jack (Mar 15, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> I bet he's all angsty and broody and sometimes his hair falls in front of his face and covers one eye like a goddamn emo.
> 
> HGGGNNNNNN. Please no.


If you expect Conan to be anything but  "MY FAMILY DEAD, UGH BROODING, UUG KILL BAD MAN SMASH" Then you are watching the wrong film. This kind of movie you don't think about, kind of like Rambo and his magical machine gun he waves around till he saves the world.

You can't take it seriously, and you should not.


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## Kellie Gator (Mar 15, 2011)

The Drunken Ace said:


> If you expect Conan to be anything but  "MY FAMILY DEAD, UGH BROODING, UUG KILL BAD MAN SMASH" Then you are watching the wrong film. This kind of movie you don't think about, kind of like Rambo and his magical machine gun he waves around till he saves the world.
> 
> You can't take it seriously, and you should not.


 There's so much more to the character and the mythos that Hollywood is completely ignoring, though. It's kind of embarrassing how the works of Robert E. Howard get dumbed down so much (even if I really liked the Schwarzenegger flick).


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## Duality Jack (Mar 15, 2011)

Kellie Gator said:


> There's so much more to the character and the mythos that Hollywood is completely ignoring, though. It's kind of embarrassing how the works of Robert E. Howard get dumbed down so much (even if I really liked the Schwarzenegger flick).


 This is obviously going to happen, people watching the movie want action, violence and fun. More would be very nice, but I do not expect it, I keep my expectations low for action flics.


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## LizardKing (Mar 15, 2011)

The Drunken Ace said:


> If you expect Conan to be anything but  "MY FAMILY DEAD, UGH BROODING, UUG KILL BAD MAN SMASH" Then you are watching the wrong film. This kind of movie you don't think about, kind of like Rambo and his magical machine gun he waves around till he saves the world.
> 
> You can't take it seriously, and you should not.


 
You're misunderstanding my point completely. There's the good angry broody, and then there's the emo bullshit "oh woe is me" broody. The original one had it right, he seemed more angry and GRRR than anything else. I'm saying I hope they don't turn Conan into some pissy little whiny cunt who's all "waaaa my family bawwwww I will avenge them as soon as find some tissues to blow my nose ;_;".


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## Kellie Gator (Mar 15, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> You're misunderstanding my point completely. There's the good angry broody, and then there's the emo bullshit "oh woe is me" broody. The original one had it right, he seemed more angry and GRRR than anything else. I'm saying I hope they don't turn Conan into some pissy little whiny cunt who's all "waaaa my family bawwwww I will avenge them as soon as find some tissues to blow my nose ;_;".


 You'd have to be an idiot to make an emo Conan.

But then again, this movie IS directed by the same guy who did the Friday the 13th remake. :V


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## Icky (Mar 15, 2011)

Kellie Gator said:


> more savage and badass than Schwarzenegger, IMO.


 
_BLASPHEMY._


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## CAThulu (Mar 15, 2011)

Kellie Gator said:


> You'd have to be an idiot to make an emo Conan.
> 
> But then again, this movie IS directed by the same guy who did the Friday the 13th remake. :V



As much as I like Jared Padalecki (because Supernatural kicks so much ass ^_^), the Friday the 13th reboot was full of derp.  Hearing that the same director is doing the Conan remake means that it's going to make Resident Evil 4 look like Hamlet.  Not to mention that my best friend loves the original Conan and he's going to go full on berserker mode once he sees what they did to his favourite film.

I'll save my cash and go see Silent Hill 2 ^_^


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## Duality Jack (Mar 15, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> You're misunderstanding my point completely. There's the good angry broody, and then there's the emo bullshit "oh woe is me" broody. The original one had it right, he seemed more angry and GRRR than anything else. I'm saying I hope they don't turn Conan into some pissy little whiny cunt who's all "waaaa my family bawwwww I will avenge them as soon as find some tissues to blow my nose ;_;".


 Well If it gets too whiney I will get bothered, but they can add a bit of self hate to the mix, but doing it right is hard, it is possible to have a person hate themselves and others and be downtrotted without it being annoying and "emo" but its a thin thin line. The line that separates "potential Oscar" from "god shoot me now"


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## Kellie Gator (Mar 15, 2011)

Icky said:


> _BLASPHEMY._


 I know lol. I just never got a barbarian vibe from Arnold. It's kinda hard to describe. I think Jason Momoa looks the part better.

But I still kinda think that this new movie isn't even gonna be half as good as the Schwarzenegger movie. That version was actually kinda deep at points and had a lot of great things going for it even if it barely had anything to do with the source material.



CAThulu said:


> As much as I like Jared Padalecki (because Supernatural kicks so much ass ^_^), the Friday the 13th reboot was full of derp.  Hearing that the same director is doing the Conan remake means that it's going to make Resident Evil 4 look like Hamlet.  Not to mention that my best friend loves the original Conan and he's going to go full on berserker mode once he sees what they did to his favourite film.
> 
> I'll save my cash and go see Silent Hill 2 ^_^


Jared Paladecki? I thought he was just an actor.

 Also, Silent Hill 2? The first one wasn't even very good to begin with! D:


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## ChaosKingX (Mar 16, 2011)

It'll probably just be a knockoff of 300. Expect a lot of blue filter and slo-mo/fast-mo shit.


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## Kellie Gator (Mar 16, 2011)

Found some more story details from a scan of a movie magazine that can be found here.


> Conan the Cimmerian (Momoa) kidnaps a mysterious girl named Tamara and uses her to draw out warlord Khalar Zym (Lang), the man who slaughtered his family and village.


This sounds a little more interesting because this is something I'd expect a Barbarian to do and it's at least somewhat different from the old movie. But it could also fall flat on it's ass. Who wants to bet there will be a lot of bickering between Conan and the girl and that they'll end up being in love with eachother in the end? :V


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## LizardKing (Mar 16, 2011)

Kellie Gator said:


> Found some more story details from a scan of a movie magazine that can be found here.
> This sounds a little more interesting because this is something I'd expect a Barbarian to do and it's at least somewhat different from the old movie. But it could also fall flat on it's ass. Who wants to bet there will be a lot of bickering between Conan and the girl and that they'll end up being in love with eachother in the end? :V


 
I think that's probably the person you see in the trailer. How could the film _not_ have a token love interest? No film is complete without one.

Augh :c


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## PKBitchGirl (Mar 21, 2011)

Apparently it's going to be based more on the original books rather than being a remake of the Governator's movie


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## Kellie Gator (Mar 22, 2011)

PKBitchGirl said:


> Apparently it's going to be based more on the original books rather than being a remake of the Governator's movie


 I hope so, but the plot synopsis sounds way too similar to Arnold's movie. Why can't they just make a movie where he's actually king of Aquilonia instead of making another origin revenge story? :[


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## Azure (Mar 22, 2011)

This is gonna be bullshit, I can already see it. Nothing about Conan the Barbarian ever needed to be remade. They'll never recreate the 80's glitz factor, or top fresh off the boat Arnold. Seriously, never.


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