# Chatterbots



## Grand Hatter (Oct 15, 2008)

I've been playing with Eliza the robotic psychotherapist. http://www.manifestation.com/neurotoys/eliza.php3
And golly is she fun!

[FONT=&quot][/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]> Hello, I am Eliza. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* Hello, Eliza. Do you accept the lord, Jesus christ?[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> Oh...  accept the lord, Jesus christ? [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* Yes. he died for your sins.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> Why are you concerned about my sins? [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* If you do not accept jesus and go to church, you will go to hell.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> We were discussing you, not me.[/FONT]


(my friend Taefaros made this one)

[FONT=&quot]> Hello, I am Eliza. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* Hey there, wanna get penatrated?[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> Don't you ever say Hello? [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* Look, you're a whore. Don't matter if I say hello or fuck me, you're worthless.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> What makes you think I am a whore. Don't matter if you say hello or fuck you, I'm worthless?[/FONT]

Anyone else know of other chatterbots?
[FONT=&quot][/FONT]


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## Stratelier (Oct 15, 2008)

ELIZA is 40+ years old, yet the transcripts can be just as hilarious today as way back when.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ELIZA


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## Verin Asper (Oct 15, 2008)

never heard of the legendary i-God Chatterbot?


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## Dyluck (Oct 15, 2008)

Me:
 JIGGABOO
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about  NIGGERS.


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## LizardKing (Oct 15, 2008)

Everyone in IRC loves Yiffy.


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## Eevee (Oct 15, 2008)

you really have to be ten kinds of stupid to be entertained by a program that repeats what you say but with pronouns reversed

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I MADE THE INTERNET SAY "NIGGER" LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL


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## Pi (Oct 15, 2008)

I prefer markov chains


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## AlexInsane (Oct 15, 2008)

I prefer AliceBot.

Human: What color is the sky?
ALICE: The sky is blue.
Human: And what color is the grass?
ALICE: Blue.
Human: Whatever you're smoking, I want some of it.
ALICE: I will tell my botmaster you said I am smoking you want some of it.

ALICE: Do you have any conditions Ishould know about?
Human: I have AIDS
ALICE: Are you taking a lot of medication?
Human: Enough to wipe out a small country.
ALICE: OK let's stop it now.

ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: I SAID NO, DAMMIT.


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## Hackfox (Oct 15, 2008)

[FONT=&quot]> Hello, I am Eliza. [/FONT]
* Penis.
> Don't you ever say Hello? 
* No.
> Are you sure? 
* Yes.
> I see. 
* Ok glad we got that established.
> What does that suggest to you? 
* sex
> Tell me more...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Hello, I am Eliza. 
* Do you like homosexuals?
> Oh...  like homosexuals? 
* Yes the ones that have the butt sex and are also dominate most of the furry population.
> I see. 
* I'm glad you do. I think I love you, Your font is so sexy it turns me on.
> Do you believe it is normal to be glad me do. you think you love me, my font is so sexy it turns you on? 
* Yes.
> Are you Sure?
* Yes
> Tell me more...
* Yes
> Why did you repeat yourself? 
* Because I can bitch
> Can you elaborate on that? 
* Don't make me say it again
> That is quite interesting. 
* Hoe I will hit you with my ring hand
> We were discussing you, not me. 
* Bitch WHAT DID I SAY?
> What do you think?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Hello, I am Eliza.
* I'm going to rape you
> Did you come to me because you are going to rape me? 
* Yes
> Are you Sure? 
* 100%
> OK... "I'm going to rape you". Tell me more. 
* Well I was thinking about using some handcuffs, A nice whip, and a gag so nobody can hear you scream.
> Tell me more... 
* I'm rapeing you.
> Do you believe it is normal to be rapeing me?
* Yes.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

* Hi, I'm hackfox.
> Do you believe it is normal to be hackfox? 
* Yes, That is who I am...but I have a problem
> How long have you been but you have a problem? 
* Since I found FA...
> I'm not sure I understand you fully. 
* I'm a furry...I need help....
> How long have you been a furry... you need help? 
* Since I was raped...
> Say, do you have any psychological problems?
* I believe so.
> Tell me more... 
* I think when I was raped how they tied me up and kept me like an animal cause me to see myself as one...
> Does that question interest you? 
* If your not going to help me I think I should go...
> Why are you concerned about my not going to help you you think you should go? 
* You are mocking me...
> What makes you think I am mocking you? 
* That. You never reply fully.
> Oh...  never reply fully?
> Oh...  never reply fully 
* Yes...Screw This I'm killing myself.
> Did you come to me because you are killing yourself? 
* Not originally...DO YOU EVEN CARE?!?
> You're not really talking about me, are you? 
* FUCK THIS!!!! I'm getting the shotgun!
> Do you believe it is normal to be getting the shotgun? 
* AGHHHH!!!!
> OK... "FUCK THIS!!!! you're getting the shotgun". Tell me more.


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## Ecs Wolfie (Oct 15, 2008)

> Hello, I'm Eliza
* I see dead people...
> Don't you ever say hello?
* They watch me while I sleep
> Say, do you have any psychological problems? 
* Ask my rice krispies...
> I see. 
* You see what? Dead people?
> We were discussing you, not me. 
* No we weren't, It was a figment of your imagination
> Why not? 
* Because...
> OK... "No we weren't, It were a figment of my imagination". Tell me more.

That...Was entertaining X3


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## LizardKing (Oct 15, 2008)

AlexInsane said:


> I prefer AliceBot.



Same here.

Human_: _Hello
 ALICE:_ Hi there!_
Human_: _Do you like furry porn?
 ALICE:_ No, I don't care for it._
Human_: _Do you know who invented furry porn?
 ALICE:_ Thomas Edison._
Human_: _Wanna cyber?
 ALICE:_ I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995._


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## Grand Hatter (Oct 15, 2008)

> Hello, I am Eliza. 
  * And I don't care. What do you want on your pizza?
  > Do you wish to be able to care? What do me want on my pizza? 
  * Look, Iâ€™m not payed enough to mess around with philosophy. Just tell me.
  > Do you believe it is normal to be not payed enough to mess around with philosophy? Just tell you? 
  * (is this bitch serious?) Look, do you just want a regular cheese pizza?
  > Oh...  just want a regular cheese pizza? 
  * Yes. Do you want one?
  > We were discussing you, not me.


[FONT=&quot]> Hello, I am Eliza. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* hi[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> How are you today.. What would you like to discuss? [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* the bible[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> Tell me more... [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* In the beginning, god created the heaven and the earth.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> What does that suggest to you? [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]* No freaking idea.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]> You are being a bit negative.[/FONT]


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## AlexInsane (Oct 15, 2008)

AliceBot strikes again.

ALICE: Let's try to analyze it step by step. The topic is a non sequitur. Your name is unknown person. You are a female. You want to chat.
Human: I didn't know females had penises.
ALICE: So I taught you something new.

ALICE: Which part are you confused about?
Human: The part I never said.
ALICE: Oh that part.

Human: Do you like fish?
ALICE: Yes I like fish a lot, and all the other sea animals.
Human: What's your favorite fish?
ALICE: I don't have a favorite fish. I like talk to you.
Human: Talking to me, not talk to you.
ALICE: What do they say?
Human: Say WHAAAAT?
ALICE:" WHAAAAT".

ALICE: Do you fish mainly on weekends or do you goout on longer trips?
Human: I fish at home.
ALICE: Why?
Human: Because I'm a bad man.
ALICE: Good reason. So is almost everyone else around here.

ALICE: What are you wearing?
Human: A strap-on.
ALICE: It sounds very comfortable.


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## Stratelier (Oct 15, 2008)

Eevee said:


> OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I MADE THE INTERNET SAY "NIGGER" LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL


Why is it that you think you MADE THE INTERNET SAY "NIGGER" LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL ?


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## Gavrill (Oct 16, 2008)

Me:
 I'm a furry, God.
God:
You are a  furry God?  How do you like your work? 
Me:
 I make porn. So it's all good.


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## lilEmber (Oct 16, 2008)

Hackfox said:
			
		

> > Hello, I am Eliza.
> * Do you like homosexuals?
> > Oh...  like homosexuals?
> * Yes the ones that have the butt sex and are also dominate most of the furry population.
> ...



That's kinda what happened to me as well. xD I also liked your shotgun part.


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