# mate or not?



## takkisisdark (Jul 6, 2007)

who out there dose not have a mate yet im sry if a personal question you dont have to answer me but im a curious lil dragon ok not so lil but lilttle compared to some


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## OnyxVulpine (Jul 6, 2007)

No :/ never been close to one either.


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## Arka (Jul 6, 2007)

Nope.  Kinda want to keep it that way for at least a few more years.


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## Option7 (Jul 6, 2007)

As above, except I did get very close, only I fucked it up :


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## takkisisdark (Jul 6, 2007)

iv been close to some one but never like i am now the last person i was close to duped me for a human


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## dragonfan (Jul 6, 2007)

i'm not really interested in having a RL mate just wanted to be with my emera and go back.i hate human babies ew


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## McRoz (Jul 6, 2007)

Nope, no "mates", never any previous mates, probably no mates ever. I just don't think it's for me (for whatever reason, who knows); 'tis a nice thing to possess, though.


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## Wolfstanus (Jul 6, 2007)

Option7 said:
			
		

> As above, except I did get very close, only I fucked it up :


Same way but did have one at one point had to call it off though. All I ever end up with now is just friends. :/ But still hopeful. Also have a hard time expressing myself.


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## Magica (Jul 6, 2007)

I just have my boyfriend.  To me, it's only called a mate when you're married to them.


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## ADF (Jul 6, 2007)

Nope, I have just never hit it off with anyone on that level. I have no problems acquiring friends, male or female, and socializing with them, but in terms of relationships my experience is nil. 

It is because I am the stereotypical computer nerd I guess; glasses, spend too long on the computer, minimal outgoing activities, the lot. The only girls I encounter are under the same category, quiet and nerdy. But that is no real excuse, I have seen plenty of people like me in relationships, hell I know three nerdy couples. Though I have to admit some of them seemed to only do it for convenience, so they could say they had a partner.

But the thing is I have never felt motivated to actually go out of my way and meet someone; you hear about people going crazy trying to find a girlfriend, I have never felt that drive. Even if I met someone what would I do? I'm not outgoing, there is nothing I like that would get me to go out and even if there was I don't have the social skills to fit in, but that is a different story.

So to summarize no, I don't intend to, and even if I found someone I wouldn't subject them to such a boring relationship.


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## FanArtHo (Jul 6, 2007)

None.

Have had two official partners, neither of which were interested in partnership as much as having a _sibling_.

But learned a lot about what I needed in a partner. Now, I'm not afraid to get frisky as long as I'm being realistic.

There is great wisdom in waiting.

There is also great potential in going out there and meeting folk.

FAH!


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## setun (Jul 6, 2007)

I'm sticking to my guns and looking for a woman who gets the jokes I make, rather than the other ones who just look at me weird lol...and speaking of which, there is this girl at work who is like that..../thumbsup


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## OnyxVulpine (Jul 6, 2007)

I haven't even had a girlfriend. I have a good amount of friends though, wish some of them were furry with me!.. Oh wait I do.. I should go talk to her.


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## Aden (Jul 6, 2007)

Yeps.

I used to think I would never attach to someone on that level (especially a guy O..o), or that I didn't need it. But now that I'm here, it's wonderful.

Take my advice - Never, _ever_ find a mate just because you want to be with someone. Hold out for the right person, and it will make up for the wait tenfold.

^..^


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## Silverdragon00 (Jul 6, 2007)

First of all, takksisdark, PLEASE use punctuation. Your posts hurt to read without it.

Secondly, nope, I don't have a mate, never attemopted to get one either, to be honest. For now, I enjoy my solitude.


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## Kiniel (Jul 6, 2007)

Kiniel voted no.

Actually, I'm in a somewhat similar boat as ADF.  I have tons of friends, but... just friends, although I'm not at all adversed to the idea of progressing further than that.  Those poor introverted beings among us (read: me) need something of an extra push, I guess.  Stragely enough, though, the females I _do_ seem to attract are all the ones that I'm not really _interested_ in, to that odd.  *Shrug*

(I have no idea why I referred to myself in the thrid person in the first line...)


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## Kitfox (Jul 6, 2007)

I did but she had to move. Now I'm alone and slightly asexual again.


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## Ron Overdrive (Jul 6, 2007)

Nope, never had a mate. Only friends. It sucks because I do feel lonely allot, but at the same time I really don't have the drive to go out and find a girl. From observation alone it doesn't seem worth it with the way people are so willing to cheat on others or just don't know how to treat one another. Then again it doesn't help that I got confidence issues I won't go into. So for the time being I'm not with anyone.


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## net-cat (Jul 7, 2007)

Nope. Mainly from a lack of trying.

(I wouldn't say no if the right person came along, though.)


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## McRoz (Jul 7, 2007)

net-cat said:
			
		

> Nope. Mainly from a lack of trying.
> 
> (I wouldn't say no if the right person came along, though.)


I'd have to say I'd be in the same boat.


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## Muddobbers (Jul 7, 2007)

Alas, no.  I've looked but everywhere the girls are either already with someone or are 3 months pregnant..

I definitely feel like I've been missing out.  Who knows, though?


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## BigRed (Jul 7, 2007)

I voted no. Truthfully, I think I'm too young (at the age of 17). I don't have strong thoughts against premarital 'anything', I just don't believe in a relationship that wont last after High School ends and college and potential jobs separate partners.Â Â 

 I know this is a "mate or no" thread, but I would like to ask if it's worth it waiting for another furry, or at least a partner accepting of furries? Are we that abundant but concealed? Or do I hold false high hopes? :?Â Â When I say "worth it," I could always settle with a girl who doesn't know about furries. I'd just go mad. :lol: 

 Didn't mean for this to become a discussion thing, I just dont know where else this would be appropriate. And if I drag on the whole "what if?" bit, just tell me to shuddap. :wink:


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## x3dreturns (Jul 7, 2007)

A mate... That usually involves a bit of interest, now doesn't it...
I suppose, the answer is 'no' then.
I don't think I've ever had anyone interested in me.

I suppose I don't acknowledge the possibility of interest they may
hold so that I might avoid heartbreak later down the line.


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## parrothead529 (Jul 7, 2007)

I've had a few on and off, only been really close to 1, now I'm single again


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## Leahtaur (Jul 7, 2007)

I don't have a mate. I have a boyfriend of three years, because I'm a human being.


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## LLiz (Jul 7, 2007)

No I don't have one, I have never had luck in the girl department, I have friends that are girls but I always manage to royally screw up when I go after someone for more than friendship.

I don't try as hard as I should and I think that's because I never have any luck. I am certianly not waiting for "Miss Right" to come along, I've seen plenty of "Miss Right's", I just always stuff up in some way or another.

An example being, there was this one girl, I was crazy about her, and she knew it. One day she came up to talk to me, I lost the ability to speak, and I then kept away from her for a while. She ended up asking somebody else out.

I can bring up other examples but I'd rather not.


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## Ember (Jul 7, 2007)

recently split up with my partner of 8 months, so no


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## Spider (Jul 7, 2007)

I've been with my boyfriend seven years now


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## ceacar99 (Jul 7, 2007)

i have the distinct misfortune of having too soft of a heart.... it doesnt sound like it all the time but i do. in this case that means that being lonely strikes me hard. now im no virgin but mate in my life have been rare and far between...

i recently found this nice girl, she had this cute short hair, wonderfull smile and a sexy body. add to that she was into some of the nerdy things i am into(she'd come over and not want to do anything but watch ramna 1/2, lol) and you have  like the perfect girl for me.... especially because she could stomach my enless joking and conversation(actually she laughed alot ). this is a perfect example of how misfortune allways strikes me however... i didnt act soon enough asking her out and she quite wisely didnt wait for my shy slow ass and went out with another. we remained friends and ive been pretty much forced into a possition to watch the girl i was midly in love with(cmon we werent dating, it was mild in my book then) do lovey things with another guy.... like alot of things in my life i just kinda stomached the pain and moved on...


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## Bloodangel (Jul 7, 2007)

Hang on...

*checks under the rug*

Nope. Thought I was onto a winner there.


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## Rostam The Grey (Jul 7, 2007)

I'm married with children


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## adambomb (Jul 7, 2007)

i have a H0OM@N mate


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## Zues (Jul 7, 2007)

Nope, Bunny is not taken! Sad, she was, but he um...well dissappeared, (evil laugh)Bunny is just a big slut who wants love.


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## Kiniel (Jul 7, 2007)

Well this poll is getting more and more depressing with each moment, isn't it?


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## McRoz (Jul 7, 2007)

Kiniel said:
			
		

> Well this poll is getting more and more depressing with each moment, isn't it?



I've seen worse; I actually think this thread is getting _less_ depressing 'cause of all the new posters.


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## Bokracroc (Jul 7, 2007)

I have a couple of close mates.


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## Baltis (Jul 7, 2007)

Nope, but I like bein' a swinging bachelor right now! XD Party time!!!


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## T.C. cat fox (Jul 8, 2007)

nope i'm alone and sometimes i think i'll die that way


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## Baderach (Jul 8, 2007)

Wow, this thread is like a big injection of sadness.  And it's like it's given to you in one of those enormous hypos they use to jab you in the bumcheek.  I feel vaguely depressed after reading the answers.

I don't have a mate, but that's because I'm human, not an animal.  I _do_ have an Other, who I intend to spend a very long time with (as a side note, I don't really believe too hard in marriage, so no real need for that except the court-type if there is a need for legal rights preservation at some point I guess).  I'd be an absolute moron--the high king of idiots, the czar of raging stupidity, and the dictator of the land of Halfwittia--to ever let him go.

Fortunately, I'm smart.


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## Unbrokenkarma (Jul 8, 2007)

I'v got some awesome mates, but I fear they are the sort Bok has 

Not in a relationship atm, I've been with two people, both for about 2 years each. They were both good, and ended when they needed to, whihc is good too. I've had flings and the occasional screw around, but nothing I would call a reltionship since about a year ago now. 

No rush, it just seems to happen when it should happen - So no, but not a depressing no.


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## takkisisdark (Jul 8, 2007)

yea this is a very depressing tread. but im sry i had to ask about it because i just met some one and finaly and i was exicted about it and now im afarid of loosing him


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## darkdoomer (Jul 8, 2007)

i consider myself in since the rare persons i keep some relationships lives now miles away from here.  it sucks, huh?


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## takkisisdark (Jul 8, 2007)

yea it does  i must be lucky to have some one at the moment


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## McRoz (Jul 8, 2007)

T.C. cat fox said:
			
		

> nope i'm alone and sometimes i think i'll die that way


Ironically, you're _not_ alone, just alone in the way you mentioned.


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## Gennets (Jul 8, 2007)

u all fail in life. Rofflecopterz on toazt


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## Darksilver (Jul 8, 2007)

None, waiting for the right person...I think o_o;


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## McRoz (Jul 8, 2007)

Gennets said:
			
		

> u all fail in life. Rofflecopterz on toazt



OOZ GEWD GRAHMMUR!!!

69 in 1383472 peenut buttur buttsckz >:]0


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## Gennets (Jul 8, 2007)

OEMG DERE BE ANTHOR 1 OF ME!111

peenyt butt0r? dat iz AMEZING!!1111

i luv u


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## McRoz (Jul 8, 2007)

Gennets said:
			
		

> OEMG DERE BE ANTHOR 1 OF ME!111
> 
> peenyt butt0r? dat iz AMEZING!!1111
> 
> i luv u



sryy WII c@nnut be 2gehdur. U iz uh n3rd.

SPEIGELMAAAAAklgjdkAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!NNN!!!!!!!11!!


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## Starburst (Jul 8, 2007)

I have a boyfriend!  Two, actually, but I'm polyamorous >>


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## Gennets (Jul 8, 2007)

OMG FIEN FUK U DEN MCROWHATEVER

starduzt iz da onli 1 4 me enywayz.


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## DodgeAMD (Jul 8, 2007)

Yeps
and I couldn't be happier.
Even if he is a dirty southerner


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## HaTcH (Jul 8, 2007)

I've got a mate. Its an online relationship at this point, we're going to try and solidify it with a meeting at his place in Arizona, woot woot 

I never thought I could actually get close to someone like I did with this person. It's an intriguing match.


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## Pomander (Jul 8, 2007)

Nope, but I do have _a husband_.


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## 823543 (Jul 8, 2007)

The message is too short. Please enter a longer message.


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## Project_X (Jul 8, 2007)

*Snifle* I don't have a mate. And I haven't had a real one, ever. It's so horrible!!! TT_TT


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## Mikelus (Jul 8, 2007)

I believe that i will be alone for all of my existance. Never had a mate in anyway, Dont Think I ever will. Chances of me running into someone id actually like to date would be slim or nil, Seeing as how Women tend to stray away from nice guys.


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## Baderach (Jul 8, 2007)

No we don't.

A lot of us would kill for a good nice guy.

There is a difference between a nice guy and a desperate nice guy, though.

None of us will go within a million feet of the latter.


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## Mikelus (Jul 8, 2007)

I'm not, im quiet reserved and usually a nice guy who would take a bullet for pretty much anybody(only 4 people on the planet I wouldent take a bullet for) Not to mention i am kind of a nerd. But they all just overlook me. Its all cool though really, more time for gaming .


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## Jelly (Jul 8, 2007)

I have a _girlfriend._

MURRY PURRY.


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## Project_X (Jul 8, 2007)

Baderach said:
			
		

> No we don't.
> 
> A lot of us would kill for a good nice guy.
> 
> ...



I'm a Nice Guy on the verge of going nuts because so many girls say,"Your such a sweet guy, but..." Then there's something like 'I'm already taken' or 'I'm just a free spirit'
It's heartbreaking...


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## Leahtaur (Jul 9, 2007)

823543 said:
			
		

> Humans are a member of the genus Homo and especially of the species H. sapiens of the animal kingdom. We are animals, I would imagine the term â€˜mateâ€™ can also be applied to us.



Oh sure, you _can_ use the term. I just choose not to. I like to think myself different than the average rat/otter/lizard. So I have a boyfriend. I've never been one for the furry "terminology".


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## LLiz (Jul 9, 2007)

Baderach said:
			
		

> No we don't.
> 
> A lot of us would kill for a good nice guy.
> 
> ...


I think that I am a nice guy but perhaps I come off as desperate :S , how can I tell if I am being desperate or not?

Like how do you tell?


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## McRoz (Jul 9, 2007)

LLiz said:
			
		

> Baderach said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



These are probably the two best posts I've seen in this topic. I agree with LLiz; how does one tell if one is desperate (despite the obvious signs) and if one is considered desperate, how does he/she fix that?

Lets see here. Since Baderach's post has been replied too by, I think, a good amount of people, I guess the only things I'd have to say are:

I think that I'm an ugly, cold hearted, unconfident, fat, humorless, isolated, smelly, perverted, easily angered, annoying, clumsy, insane guy.
Most people would think just the opposite of me. Who knows, maybe I just have awful self-esteem


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## Randy (Jul 9, 2007)

I am single, and always have been, MIGHT be interested in the future but im kinda happy as i am right now, human's dont really do anything for me.


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## themocaw (Jul 9, 2007)

I have no mate.  I am neither Australian, British, or a dog.


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## Baderach (Jul 9, 2007)

D'you know, I'm honestly surprised by how often I have to tell people this kind of thing--it shouldn't be that hard to figure out on one's own.  But hey, life is all about learning, right?  And whenever someone actually listens to me in this matter, it turns out for the best.  So, in the interest of helping others:

Do you know why the perceived "bad boys" get attention from women while the typical "nice guys" don't?

Because "bad boys" are perfectly content with themselves and don't give a damn about whether or not they're attached to someone, and 95% of self-proclaimed "nice guys" are bound and determined to make sure they can show _some_ female, _somewhere_, that they ARE so nice and helpful and loving and emotional and whatever, and good fodder for a relationship.  And you know what?

STOP THAT.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW.

If you are a truly nice guy, it will show in your actions and words without your trying to make it do so.  As such, you do not NEED to go out trying to impress women.

By your very nature--by the way you carry yourself--by your being absolutely confident ON YOUR OWN that the world is lucky to have such a polite and gentlemanly person such as yourself in it, and that you DO NOT NEED the validation of a woman to prove that point--you prove that you are capable of handling yourself, and others, in the correct fashion, and without needing to cling onto and subsequently drown others in some misguided search for the meaning and happiness in your life.

Stop trying to impress us all.  Do something because you WANT to do it, and feel it is the right thing to do.  Don't do it because Miss Manners said so, or because you're trying to bring back chivalry, or because you think it will catch our attention, or because you hear that women want men who are willing to do x or y thing.  We can tell the difference.  No, I'm not sure how.  Call it a combination of body language and women's intuition.  But we know when you're being yourself, and when you're just showing up in costume with the right cue cards.

Sign off this webpage for an hour, and go sit down somewhere, and think really hard.  Who are you?  You're yourself.  Whose life are you put here on this earth to enjoy?  Your own.  Do you need anyone else to prove that you are who you are?  No, you don't--to paraphrase a philosophery type person: you think, therefore you are.  I can stand here and nod my head until it falls off when you tell me your flaws and strengths, but that doesn't validate them.  Only you know yourself.  As such, do you need anyone else to enjoy your life, in the fashion that you know pleases you?  No, you don't.

So quit caring.

Go through your life, living how you think you should, doing what you think feels right.  Make this life your own.  Learn to be yourself.  Learn to love yourself.  Learn what you can and want to do.  Then go be, love, and do, all as yourself.  When you are comfortable in this big ol' world, not needing anyone to get along, that's where you should be.  If life doesn't hand you a great woman on a silver platter for a while, then who cares?  You don't need one to get along.  Be happy and keep on keepin' on.  And if it does, then hey, that's just an excellent bonus to your already excellent life.  Be happy and keep on keepin' on.

When you're happy with your place in the world, other happy people will want to join you... because two happy people is twice the fun as one happy person, and the best place to be yourself is around others who can be themselves.

The best things happen to you when you don't expect them to.  So the simplest, most obvious solution... is to not bother expecting them in the first place.


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## McRoz (Jul 9, 2007)

Well said. Maybe if I was'nt feeling sorry for myself like a lethargic lump on a log I'd elaborate further. Still, I think that post made a lot of people think.


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## Baderach (Jul 9, 2007)

McRoz said:
			
		

> Well said. Maybe if I was'nt feeling sorry for myself like a lethargic lump on a log I'd elaborate further. Still, I think that post made a lot of people think.



Thank you.  

Though, the only time one should ever waste moments feeling sorry for oneself is in case of a huge and unexpected trauma, such as:
*your arms being torn off when you're due to attend a rock-paper-scissors championship match,
*losing your wallet in Vegas before you could even start gambling, or,
*the local deli being out of your favorite sammich.

No more lump-logging, buster, sez I.  Go forth and utilize your personality in a new way.  Example:  easily angered, eh?  Take up whacking punching bags, or shadowboxing if you've no access to a gym or one you can hang in the garage.  Good stuff.  I do it to safely run out my own rages.

And that's one of your "bad traits"; you didn't even give me any good ones to work with.  Unless you're the devil himself, spade tail and all, you don't not have any good ones.  So think of one, and apply it creatively, too.


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## McRoz (Jul 9, 2007)

Baderach said:
			
		

> Unless you're the devil himself, spade tail and all, you don't not have any good ones.



Devil?!? O_O uh, who said anything about that? >_> <_<

I'm just a normal guy-*SOOOOOUUUUUUUULSSSS!!!!* X_X


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## Rostam The Grey (Jul 9, 2007)

Pomander said:
			
		

> Nope, but I do have _a husband_.



NOOOOOO!!!  j/k


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## Seratuhl (Jul 10, 2007)

Oh, my mate is more than what I asked for....
Hmmm...I recall searching for a mate who loves and understands me, eats my cooking, and plays videogames and some sports with me.

I got a mate who does that above and MORE...
Aye, she does so many kinky things to me... I usually giving in to her sexual demands. She also has a nag of giving me love bites!!! ( Usually on the neck or chest ).

Odd....but satisfying. Another great person I'd be willing to die for.


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## OnyxVulpine (Jul 10, 2007)

Hmm I hear I'm a sweet guy, and I'm cool and whatever. But I'm just bad with girls.. I guess I can stay without someone.


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## veeflames187 (Jul 10, 2007)

I had one but she was killed in a car accident. I almost went with her. Im happy to be alive but I miss her Alot. The basterd who hit us took off. The car was still mobile and I drove her to the hospitial but they coulden't save her. They never caught the guy.


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## McRoz (Jul 10, 2007)

veeflames187 said:
			
		

> I had one but she was killed in a car accident. I almost went with her. Im happy to be alive but I miss her Alot. The basterd who hit us took off. The car was still mobile and I drove her to the hospitial but they coulden't save her. They never caught the guy.



Wow, that's really sad. It's amazing you even mustered up the courage to post such a thing.


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## dwitefry (Jul 10, 2007)

I feel so single I thought I'd post and be a miserable bastard. Sorry all.

Why do I want to not be single? because, and this is true, I abosultely love being in love and I absolutley love girls, I am mad about them. It sounds either perverted or psychotic but it's just honest. I love girls. I hate being single. I also love hugs too.

There should be a dating thing on here, is there?

Also re: The great big long 'Nice Guys' post:

It's made me think. In my defence I do act the 'nice guy' (actually I act the nice bloke, which I think is different, but I can't think how to explain it in american terms) but when and if i do the right thing I do it becasue I think it's the right thing to do. Not because I want to impress anyone. I'm not Milhouse. I dont' believe in upsetting good people, and well if I fancy ya, I must think you're a good person right? and i do belive in doing what you believe in. 

Or something like that. I'm a writer that can't explain his feelings, go figure eh?

MeX


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## themocaw (Jul 10, 2007)

Regarding nice guys:

I once heard someone say "The only reason people say that nice guys finish last is because the losers complain loudest."


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## Nikyusha (Jul 10, 2007)

Not really, but I do have a girlfriend currently.

I just believe half of the nice guys have a bit bad social skills.


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## KitsuneKit (Jul 10, 2007)

I've never even been kiss or on a date.

... and I'm freakin 20.


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## McRoz (Jul 10, 2007)

KitsuneKit said:
			
		

> I've never even been kiss or on a date.
> 
> ... and I'm freakin 20.



Welcome to the club, buddy. I'm a virgin to all that plus hugs and even cybersex; now _that's_ pathetic :cry:


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## SachiCoon (Jul 10, 2007)

Yep. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. I've gotten close to other ones before, but I don't think my relationship with anyone has been as strong as it is now. I've actually been thinking a LOT lately about having children with him.


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## foxkun (Jul 10, 2007)

Mate is such a weird word. After all, me'n adonis really can't have kiddlings (as far as I know... maybe I'm sort of strange being that can actually get pregnant or something, but so far all research has proven that to be false )

At any rate, yes, I've got a mate. He's a squishy dragon that pulled me out of some serious relationship issues, and I'm very glad for that. Been together two years as of... last Wednesday, as a matter of fact :3


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## 16weeks (Jul 10, 2007)

No, thanks to second life....*grr*


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## takkisisdark (Jul 11, 2007)

well thank you all for you posts and good luck to all you people with out a mate you will find one some day. As for all those who have one grats and i hope it goes well for you.


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## quark (Jul 11, 2007)

Mikelus said:
			
		

> I believe that i will be alone for all of my existance. Never had a mate in anyway, Dont Think I ever will. Chances of me running into someone id actually like to date would be slim or nil, Seeing as how Women tend to stray away from nice guys.



You do realize that when you tell women that they don't like nice guys, that makes them not like _you_  Women generally don't enjoy people informing them what they do, and don't like.
Speaking as a member of the female species, I would much much rather have a nice guy, rather than the 'bad boy' However, I want that guy to be my friend, my companion, and my equal, not some guy who tires to constantly show me how great he is, and who tries way too hard.
But then again, I'm dating a guy who lacks any semblance of romance, so maybe I'm nuts.


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## McRoz (Jul 11, 2007)

quark said:
			
		

> Mikelus said:
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Same for us. Good speech


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## Tevnon (Jul 12, 2007)

I do have a mate. We have been together for two and a half years or so.
Unfortunately he has developed cancer. He mainly just lays in bed now. More and more our relationship revolves around me giving him medical care and nothing else. It's beggining to feal more like being a nurse than being in a relationship.
I still love him to death, though.


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## FreerideFox (Jul 12, 2007)

Had a mate once. That lasted for 2 years, then he just threw me away. been single now for going on 4 years. 

Worthless fox is worthless...


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## Rostam The Grey (Jul 12, 2007)

There was a study done and basically it said:
Women marry nice guys.
Women lust for muscles.

Otherwords, if a woman wants a good time, she's more likely to hook up with a guy with muscles. Not a bad guy, just muscles or obviously in shape guy. If a woman was looking for a mate, she would look for a nice guy. Most nice guys aren't confident nowadays, and confidence as well as self-respect means a LOT to a woman. She really doesn't care to hear how you will never find a woman because you are a nice guy. It's not impressing her. As a matter of fact, women don't care to hear any whinning...


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## gust (Jul 13, 2007)

I'm single.
I'd like a mate, but i never start a conversation (ever), so it hasent happened yet...


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## Leahtaur (Jul 13, 2007)

Rostam The Grey said:
			
		

> As a matter of fact, women don't care to hear any whinning...



To be fair, it's probably not a hugely attractive trait to men either. 

I agree with the general consensus. Being miserable and a sad sack isn't impressing anyone. But I'd imagine it's the same reversed, isn't it? Women whining about how pathetic and single they are, how they just want someone to love... if that does attract someone, it won't be the kind of guy you'd want to stay with.

I propose that we add a third genre of man to "nice guy" and "bad boy": the happy medium. The guy who is self-confident and does think of himself first (that's not a bad thing, that's just a survival trait) but is also nice to someone whom he thinks is worth the treatment. A little of both extremes is perfect for a long-term relationship.


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## chronoteeth (Jul 14, 2007)

To all men: If the niceguy act doesn't work, take viagra. Works everytime.

lolololololololololololololo


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## Rostam The Grey (Jul 14, 2007)

Leahtaur said:
			
		

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Men don't care to hear other men whine. But we really don't care if a woman whines or not. We have the super-ability to block out whining and nagging.


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## veeflames187 (Jul 14, 2007)

McRoz said:
			
		

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Well Life is unfair but you cant dwell on the past. Life goes on. She wouldent have wanted me to obsess over it. I miss her but you cant change the past it happened and you just got to deal with it.


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## Esplender (Jul 14, 2007)

Don't have one, nor do I intend on having one for a very, very long time.


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## McRoz (Jul 15, 2007)

veeflames187 said:
			
		

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Sounds like you got this whole life thing figured out.


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## Zelda Marraven (Jul 15, 2007)

Don't have one, and have never had anything even remotely close to one. It doesn't bother me that much, though; I'm quite comfortable with being single.


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## valolove1975 (Jul 16, 2007)

Yup, I'm happily married.


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## Dr.Wilopolis (Jul 16, 2007)

No, not really. I don't care if I do or don't find one. I'm just fine either way. That is all.


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## McRoz (Jul 16, 2007)

valolove1975 said:
			
		

> Yup, I'm happily married.Â Â



...to Inuyasha?!? 0_o


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## ChibiJaime (Jul 16, 2007)

I do, and am quite happy. We are engaged to be married July 20th of next year, on the birthday of my grandmother, who passed away seven years ago come August. She would have been 72 this year.


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## Kale (Jul 16, 2007)

Christ, all those people who dont' have mates. XD We should start an FA Dating Thread. ^_^, Oh my children (i am actually you're father... sorry to break it you this way) I will be your mate lol. All 58 of you.


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## TundraWolfBlade (Jul 16, 2007)

Wooh... i see you getting a lot of std's *Laughs then backs away.*


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## Vgm22 (Jul 16, 2007)

Nope, I don't have a mate. I want one badly though as I'm lonely as hell.


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## Shalindria (Jul 20, 2007)

Yes, but they are seriously overrated.


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## Orlith Nemeth (Jul 20, 2007)

I have one, but i prefer to call him my boyfriend or finance, mate sounds so...non-perminent.


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## Dead-Zero (Jul 20, 2007)

Ive tried at it a few times with girls/boys with pretty faces, realized i hate there guts and just liked how they look, dumped them, and so on. I'm only staying with someone i truly love. I don't care if i never find them, thats the only way its gonna work.


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## TundraWolfBlade (Jul 20, 2007)

Orlith Nemeth said:
			
		

> I have one, but i prefer to call him my boyfriend or finance, mate sounds so...non-perminent.



You mean fiancee right?  Finance just doesn't sound right...


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## KristynLioness (Jul 20, 2007)

I have my fiance' Vortex^^ We're getting married in late September. He was the first mate I've had that I didn't meet on the internet first and that I've gotten to see every single day and I'm really looking forward to our life together


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## Pinkuh (Jul 20, 2007)

I have been married for 2 years now and have been with my man for 6.

I have some very sound sage advice.

Be yourself. 

If you want to be happy the rest of your life in a relationship you have to not hide anything from the get go. If you like furry, then like furry, if you have the worlds largest collection of unopened G.I. Joes, then keep it up! do not change anything about yourself.

If you are looking for a long term mate you absolutely NEED to make sure that you are yourself from the beginning, and whoever you are with is genuine as well. 

do not get into a relationship with what you think the public Ideal is. This will only lead to sadness, anger, and hurt. You need to sit and think about what your Ideal is and then go after it from there.

Healthy couples don't scream at each other on a regular basis (in an angry way)
Healthy couples realize that both of the people in the relationship have different needs and wants.
Healthy couples will let their mates BREATH. (A relationship is like a flame. cup it to closely and it will either burn you or go out. However if you admire it, bask in it's warmth, and feed it it will burn brightly)
Healthy couples discuss whats going on in their lives with one another as much as possible
Healthy couples don't have any reason to hide anything from their mates.

I see allot of people on this thread talking about how "they need a mate right now and they are so depressed"

THIS IS A BAD THING.

This means that you are trying to fill a void in yourself that doesn't have an explanation. You are seeking another person to make you whole... and that will NEVER WORK. You can't expect someone to take the responsibility of making you whole. You have to do that yourself.

Before you seek a mate you need to love yourself. Because if you don't love yourself going into a relationship then you can't truely love whoever you form a relationship with.


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## GinkitsuneYasha (Jul 20, 2007)

I have a mate, Vetto Ryouzou and even though we have met on the net we have known eachother for a little over three years now and been working on trying to get each other either to Indiana or Texas for more personal meetings. So yeah... ^^;;;


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## Rhyolite (Jul 23, 2007)

I was looking for a while then got to thinking, would I really be happier?  Then I thought, maybe not so I decided not to look any more. I'd rather be on my own doing my own thing without feeling I could possible be at odds with someone else. I think maybe I thought I wanted a mate, I didn't really.


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## Poink (Jul 23, 2007)

I'm a geek.
i'm incompatible with love :C


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## G.M. (Jul 23, 2007)

Mate?  No no no.  Mates are silly and cause drama.  For the most part, I tend to avoid heavy relationships online.  I'll have fun with who I want and the like online.

Now, RL is another story, I'm quite happy with my girlfriend.


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## Arsonos (Jul 23, 2007)

I do not have a mate. I do not make first moves. Lack of trying and lack of will to persue.

At one time it really really really hurt to have nobody. To know I am a great person and be scorned by the world to be a superficial acquaintance to a bunch of superficial people. I was also very depressed all the time and to see people together and happy made me very angry. Eventually these feelings stopped and and now I really don't care much whether I have a mate or not.


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## DSJ (Jul 25, 2007)

As someone before me said, so many people are looking for a 'mate' (Christ I hate that word...) for the wrong reasons.  Searching for a partner in some vain hope to fix your life will fail.  A relationship will never repair your insecurities or emotional hangups.  If anything, a relationship will just exaggerate them, and then you end up in some co-dependent situation until your root problems boil over and both of you get hurt.

I can't believe the number of times I've asked someone why they were so desperate for a relationship, and their answer had been "because I'm lonely."  If you're lonely, get a cat.  You should seek a relationship because of what you want, not because of what you DON'T want (in this case, to not be lonely).  

And for the guy(s) with low self-esteem saying they're fat and smelly and etc., quit.  People far fatter and smellier than you have somehow landed lasting relationships.  As someone else said before, even total scumbags get dates because they're confident and secure with themselves.  If you're insecure because you're fat and smelly, you should address those issues first.  People don't want to date emotional minefields.  

You can curtain depression and desperation by keeping yourself busy.  Get a job, you'll meet lots of new people and keep your mind occupied.  And/or a hobby, something not furry related (video games don't count).  Regular exercise and yoga help combat anxiety/depression and improve your self image.  Even a fat, smelly guy who can provide for himself and has a life is 100x sexier than a fat, smelly guy who can't and doesn't.

...and hey, I *like* fat guys.


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## Acorndeer (Jul 25, 2007)

I am happily ever after married with Yiffityspiff!! ^__^  In my weird twisted hallucinations of a creepy stalker I am!
I bust into her home and shout "honey I'm home!" Then feed her cat and wash her clothes!  That's luv fer ya!


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## jcfynx (Jul 25, 2007)

Voted "no" because I am a human being and not an animal. 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			







No Fido I don't want to be friends that way. ):


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## Morrigan (Jul 25, 2007)

I have not had much luck with mates. I have had a couple but they always seem to run away. *sighs* Maybe I am just weird like that. I have someone I am lusting after now ... and have been for quite some time ... but I think I screwed up with him and hurt him and now I'm not sure he wants me any more. *sad face*


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## koutoni (Jul 25, 2007)

[size=medium]nope.[/size]


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## Orlith Nemeth (Jul 25, 2007)

TundraWolfBlade said:
			
		

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>.=.<  D'oh ....curse you Firefox for correcting my spelling! and curse me for not proofreading >.=.< lol


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## kinagaki (Jul 29, 2007)

</ lurk>

â€œSo. Youâ€™re a guy huh?â€ **screams and bolts for the hills** x3

< lurk>


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## Calhanthirs (Jul 29, 2007)

Been with my Fiance/Mate/S.O./Girlfriend for the past nigh 10 years now. We're thinking about doing the whole make-it-legal-and-the-parents-happy rigamorole next year.


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## TheGru (Jul 30, 2007)

McRoz said:
			
		

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:lol:


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## TheGru (Jul 30, 2007)

No, haven't had much luck in that department. :/


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## opalance (Jul 30, 2007)

Yep, I'm married and been so legally for a couple months now, I'd call her my mate before that though because the only thing that changed was that we were legalized when we were and could have sex without worrying about stuff.


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## Chioxin (Jul 30, 2007)

Nope!

Though I am searching, I'm just real real real shy about it.  Mostly because well... It's scary to be so open to someone!  Anyhow... 

Nope! .... But wanting...


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## sandragon (Jul 30, 2007)

I get a love  and we plan to marry eachother when we can.


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## Morrigan (Jul 30, 2007)

Perhaps a newer and better question would be ... those of you that have mates on FA .. how did you meet and end up together? How does a relationship on FA begin?


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## Jake (Jul 30, 2007)

Mhmm! a nice foxy, sadly a bit obsessed about his weight, probably from me calling my big foxy =P

Anyways...


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## Necrosis (Jul 30, 2007)

Morrigan said:
			
		

> Perhaps a newer and better question would be ... those of you that have mates on FA .. how did you meet and end up together? How does a relationship on FA begin?


Some of my experiences from having a mate usually started from either having talked to them for a long time and eventually growing close enough to form a relationship, my first. Another was from when me and the other person were good friends and decided that we should be mates just for fun, nothing serious. Unfortunately, most relationships online don't last for too long o.o


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## thegreathamster (Jul 31, 2007)

Not anymore. The bitch was cheating.


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## Sean Cross (Jul 31, 2007)

I have someone whom I love very much on FA who is a furry, but don't have a boyfriend/girlfriend irl... though I do hope to meet that person on here someday... heh. I don't know if I consider that person a mate or not, but I do know that I love them lots.

For the sake of this thread though, I do technically have one.


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## Necrosis (Jul 31, 2007)

thegreathamster said:
			
		

> Not anymore. The bitch was cheating.


That sucks 8( I've been cheated on in all of my relationships D:


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## Tundru (Jul 31, 2007)

I don't have a mate, mainly because I don't try and I don't see the point in it right now. Later on down the road, yeah I might find a mate, but not right now.


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## ebonyleopard (Aug 1, 2007)

It took me about 28 years to find the right one.  The first girl I liked I found when I was 24 (she's the one that sort of broke the seal as it were). While we weren't necessarily bf/gf, we were very close friends. I didn't officially get my first girlfriend until I was 26 (hey, I was career orientated and school focused, so I stupidly didn't allow myself a lot of time for relationships). While it didn't work out on the level of use being mates (which is a pefectly normal term, you furries, for couples, since the word originally was associated with humans anyway, it just means to pair to things together afterall), we are still very good friends.

Which is key folks, to find a good mate/significant Other/partner whatever, you first have got to be friends. Now, as a new age person in the dating game, I found my girlfriend via online. Ironically it was thanks to her liking of Ninja Turtles (of all things) and drawing one with a cross on it's back.  I sent messages to her via DA and first it simply started out about discussions about artwork. But as we got to know each other online, it then moved to phone conversations then to actually meeting. But the key to it all was, for once in my life I was brave enough to actually be the initiator and not attempt to wait for love to come to me. By taking a bold step I landed who I hope will be my perfect life-mate, because I definitely feel I've found my soul-mate.

Is it easy at times? No, but then what relationship ever is, but anything worth having requires hard work, time, and patience.  I too suffered from the nice guy syndrome for 27 of my 30 years, but its try, all good things comes to those who wait, those who are looking, and those who act.

If anything, this thread is the perfect opportunity for you 'nice guys' and you 'lonely girls' to do some checking out of the people who are talking about who's single, check where they geographically are, and maybe start talking. LOL sercet to me and Indigio Angelcat. When I first started talking ot her on DA I tried to find out as much about her as I could from talking with her, and even checked to see where geographically she was. Granted, it's about a 5 and a half hour drive between us, but that's better than half a country or more away. But every minute of the drive is worth being able to just hang out with her.


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## Fariday (Nov 9, 2008)

No...

I... well, I got close to this girl once, and thought we had something going for us, but...


Let me by with saying I was never more publicly humiliated or used...


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## Whitenoise (Nov 9, 2008)

Necromancy D: .


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## Xaerun (Nov 9, 2008)

SHIT SON is dat sum necro?


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## Hydramon (Nov 9, 2008)

Well theres 2 meanings of the word mate for me, but I can guess what one you mean. And the answer is no. Not online or IRL


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## Adelio Altomar (Nov 9, 2008)

Please note the last date is *July 31st of 2007!!!!* Please notice the dates before reviving old threads! Usually don't revive the one *more than a month old!!!*


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## Enigmaticat (Nov 9, 2008)

*I LOVE HANAZAWA <3*


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