# Coming Out: The Thread (Continued)



## Surgat (May 8, 2009)

Previous thread:
http://forums.furaffinity.net/showthread.php?t=31826

Where it left off:
http://forums.furaffinity.net/showthread.php?t=31826&page=44

I'll de-sticky the first one after a few days.


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## Loken (May 9, 2009)

aaah, a fresh thread.  

Anyway just a question, as I grew up in quite a small (hick) town and I am quite recently 'out' of said 'closet,' well to most people anyway I notice a problem.  Though I am in the 'big city' now I find that finding gay people is still quite difficult, the only one who I really know is married.  So do I just ask random guys out and 90% will be straight or am I forced to go to some gay bar?  lol Pardon my ignorance.


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## FurForCameron (May 9, 2009)

Left off on a strange note. 
To Ark, hellz yeah.
And I'm not sure it's pansexuality. He likes practically EVERYONE. Not just a select few. Pansexuals still have preferences for a few people, not most. (Usually)



> So do I just ask random guys out and 90% will be straight or am I forced to go to some gay bar? lol Pardon my ignorance.


Some sort of gay social outing is a good bet.


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## Revy (May 9, 2009)

mayeth i be blessed to post here.


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## LoinRockerForever (May 9, 2009)

Loken said:


> aaah, a fresh thread.
> 
> Anyway just a question, as I grew up in quite a small (hick) town and I am quite recently 'out' of said 'closet,' well to most people anyway I notice a problem.  Though I am in the 'big city' now I find that finding gay people is still quite difficult, the only one who I really know is married.  So do I just ask random guys out and 90% will be straight or am I forced to go to some gay bar?  lol Pardon my ignorance.



Probably putting on a facade to make themselves not looking gay. I do that, cause I know my job probably fire me if I said " I am gay ". Yeah, probably would and that's the sad thing.( And Probably doing it for the "I must look normal to flush into the crowd" thing too.)


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## LoinRockerForever (May 9, 2009)

FurForCameron said:


> Left off on a strange note.
> To Ark, hellz yeah.
> And I'm not sure it's pansexuality. He likes practically EVERYONE. Not just a select few. Pansexuals still have preferences for a few people, not most. (Usually)
> 
> ...


Love the tool cover avatar, jtm.

And Gay social outings I have a hard time to find......For gods sake no pun intended.


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## Seprakarius (May 10, 2009)

I've been securely out of the closet for a few months now. My friends know I'm gay, and I'm more than comfortable with the fact and what it means for me.

Now, actually getting into a relationship is proving somewhat troublesome. I lack "gaydar" and tend not to give off signs myself, so finding anyone else proves to be difficult. Nevertheless, I have been on a few dates with other guys, though all of these pursuits fallen apart for some reason or another. My last one was the most promising yet, but between looming distance and the fact that things were getting pushed too fast, I let that one go too.

Not sure what I'm getting at here, though. I'm not discouraged or mopey or anything, just stating the facts. xD


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## iBolt! (May 10, 2009)

Just today I helped another out of the closet as a bisexual =3 That's 4 thus far, will be 5 at the end of the month if my other friend comes out on his birthday as he said to me he would. I love helping people out with sexual orientation. I have a weakness for people who felt anything like I did... nobody deserves that.

Oh btw... post #100


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## Loken (May 10, 2009)

Seprakarius said:


> I've been securely out of the closet for a few months now. My friends know I'm gay, and I'm more than comfortable with the fact and what it means for me.
> 
> Now, actually getting into a relationship is proving somewhat troublesome. I lack "gaydar" and tend not to give off signs myself, so finding anyone else proves to be difficult. Nevertheless, I have been on a few dates with other guys, though all of these pursuits fallen apart for some reason or another. My last one was the most promising yet, but between looming distance and the fact that things were getting pushed too fast, I let that one go too.
> 
> Not sure what I'm getting at here, though. I'm not discouraged or mopey or anything, just stating the facts. xD



I have the exact same problem but without the relationship experience.  However I just found out there is some sort of club at my university for the lesbian, bi, gay crowd so I plan on checking that out Monday.  Wish me luck and I will keep yall posted.


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## Seprakarius (May 10, 2009)

Loken said:


> I have the exact same problem but without the relationship experience.  However I just found out there is some sort of club at my university for the lesbian, bi, gay crowd so I plan on checking that out Monday.  Wish me luck and I will keep yall posted.


Yeah, my campus has one of those as well. Gotta remember to join it when next semester starts up.

Hopefully it'll work out for ya, though!


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## Irreverent (May 11, 2009)

Loken said:


> I have the exact same problem but without the relationship experience.  However I just found out there is some sort of club at my university for the lesbian, bi, gay crowd so I plan on checking that out Monday.  Wish me luck and I will keep yall posted.



You might try here too.   Good luck.


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## Ceuper (May 11, 2009)

Loken said:


> I have the exact same problem but without the relationship experience.  However I just found out there is some sort of club at my university for the lesbian, bi, gay crowd so I plan on checking that out Monday.  Wish me luck and I will keep yall posted.



OMG you're from Winnipeg too?


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## Aden (May 11, 2009)

LoinRockerForever said:


> Probably putting on a facade to make themselves not looking gay.



Question: what does "looking gay" look like? I look like a normal dude, thanksverymuch.


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## Loken (May 11, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> OMG you're from Winnipeg too?


Indeed I am, its crazy I found a few other furs from Winnipeg just today.

@ Irreverent : thanks for the link.


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## Timmy (May 11, 2009)

I'm a bit worried. In my school I believe the general idea is that i'm gay (which I am by the way) but i'm not ready to come out yet. I'm too worried that if people hear it from my mouth a certain few will try to bully me. What's worse is that since i told my close friends i've felt more secure and have been acting a bit _too _camp around people. Oh well, i suppose i'll just have to ride it out and see what happens...


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## ForestFox91 (May 11, 2009)

Aden said:


> Question: what does "looking gay" look like? I look like a normal dude, thanksverymuch.


The stereotype that the majority has manufactured.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 11, 2009)

Aden said:


> Question: what does "looking gay" look like? I look like a normal dude, thanksverymuch.


Like, really flamboyantly gay. Kinda've like this. 

At least watch it until 1:00.


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## Devilot (May 12, 2009)

I think I came out to my parents at about 14... but all my friends knew already for a long time. and it wasn't a big suprise to them lol I just officially came out.


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## Takun (May 12, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> The stereotype that the majority has manufactured.




I think you mean the minority of gays manufactured?  Or are you saying that the media manufactured?


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## FurForCameron (May 12, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I think you mean the minority of gays manufactured? Or are you saying that the media manufactured?


 
I think he means the media, because the majority of gays are perfectly normal, non-lisp non-posers unlike those in the "YES dance" or whatever. 
No one suspects me of being gay except for those I've told, but I still am.


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## ForestFox91 (May 12, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I think you mean the minority of gays manufactured?  Or are you saying that the media manufactured?


The media


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## Yaoumei (May 14, 2009)

I told everyone I was bi near the end of middle school. Bad choice on my part for the schooling, I was harassed all through highschool. My mother freaked on me the first day I told her, and we never really talked about it since. She's still uncomfortable about it, but doesn't say anything. You can just tell by the way she acts.

I'm way past highschool now, married, with kids, but I'm still bi. It was just luck that I found a nice guy instead of a lady. I guess I'd be considered something else because I like people for their personalities, not what sex, religion, race or whatever, but bi's the easiest term to use.


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## Skree (May 14, 2009)

I came out as bisexual to my parents a few years ago.  They were overjoyed.  My dads rock. \m/


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 14, 2009)

Yaoumei said:


> I told everyone I was bi near the end of middle school. Bad choice on my part for the schooling, I was harassed all through highschool.


Yeah, it's not good for, well, anyone to 'come out' before college. People other than close friends and _maybe_ a select few people are too immature and insensitive at that age to take it seriously.


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## Endless Humiliation (May 14, 2009)

Skree said:


> I came out as bisexual to my parents a few years ago.  They were overjoyed.  My dads rock. \m/



You have dads? I have moms. We should hang out.


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## Skree (May 14, 2009)

Load_Blown said:


> You have dads? I have moms. We should hang out.



That would be rad. You seem like a cool guy.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 14, 2009)

I know that if I had 'moms' or 'dads' around here, I would probably have been stabbed by now. People near me aren't extraordinarily tolerant of anyone LGBT.


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## Wreth (May 14, 2009)

Yaoumei said:


> I told everyone I was bi near the end of middle school. Bad choice on my part for the schooling, I was harassed all through highschool. My mother freaked on me the first day I told her, and we never really talked about it since. She's still uncomfortable about it, but doesn't say anything. You can just tell by the way she acts.
> 
> I'm way past highschool now, married, with kids, but I'm still bi. It was just luck that I found a nice guy instead of a lady. I guess I'd be considered something else because I like people for their personalities, not what sex, religion, race or whatever, but bi's the easiest term to use.



You're pansexual, not bi =3


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## Skree (May 14, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> I know that if I had 'moms' or 'dads' around here, I would probably have been stabbed by now. People near me aren't extraordinarily tolerant of anyone LGBT.



That really sucks. Thankfully my area tends to be pretty accepting.


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## ForestFox91 (May 14, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> I know that if I had 'moms' or 'dads' around here, I would probably have been stabbed by now. People near me aren't extraordinarily tolerant of anyone LGBT.


Small Town, USA isn't so friendly either...


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## Ceuper (May 14, 2009)

Yaoumei said:


> I told everyone I was bi near the end of middle school. Bad choice on my part for the schooling, I was harassed all through highschool. My mother freaked on me the first day I told her, and we never really talked about it since. She's still uncomfortable about it, but doesn't say anything. You can just tell by the way she acts.
> 
> I'm way past highschool now, married, with kids, but I'm still bi. It was just luck that I found a nice guy instead of a lady. I guess I'd be considered something else because I like people for their personalities, not what sex, religion, race or whatever, but bi's the easiest term to use.



A girl being bisexual was picked on? That sucks. Bisexual women are like, the most mild variety of LGBT. :/  I thought it was pretty much *expected* by now. 




Skree said:


> That would be rad. You seem like a cool guy.



He is. =3


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## alicewater (May 15, 2009)

I just came out to my older brother yesterday that I'm bi and he's cool with it. But what really helped was the fact that I gave him a crap load of lesbian porn^^


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## Kanin (May 15, 2009)

alicewater said:


> I just came out to my older brother yesterday that I'm bi and he's cool with it. But what really helped was the fact that I gave him a crap load of lesbian porn^^


 
Oh lol. XD


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 16, 2009)

I keep dropping hints when I'm talking to my parents, but I don't think they're noticing. >_>


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## ForestFox91 (May 16, 2009)

I'm afraid of my parents. Especially my mother... She goes ballistic at the smallest things.


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## Endless Humiliation (May 17, 2009)

Skree said:


> That would be rad. You seem like a cool guy.



I am, listen to Ceup. x3


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## Lukar (May 17, 2009)

I'm thinking about going to school on Wednesday morning, picking up my report card, and immediately leaving. But right before I leave, I'll come out and say I'm bi to my friends. Good idea?


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## Imperial Impact (May 17, 2009)

Uh like, I'm Bi and I'm alright about it.


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## ForestFox91 (May 17, 2009)

Lukar said:


> I'm thinking about going to school on Wednesday morning, picking up my report card, and immediately leaving. But right before I leave, I'll come out and say I'm bi to my friends. Good idea?


It doesn't seem like a bad idea. Getting up the guts to say it will be the hardest part.


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## FanaticRat (May 17, 2009)

Sorry to go off on a bitchy tangent here, but if there's one thing that really annoys me about the whole thing is that homosexuality is not a "black thing." I mean, it isn't readily accepted to begin with, but it's even less "cool" in the black community--after all, didn't the majority of blacks who voted on Prop 8 vote in favor of it?--and it really pisses me off. Why is it that my race, which prides itself on a history of Civil Rights movement, overcoming oppression and discrimination, and endorsing acceptance of all, so readily opposes the idea of not being straight and does not stick up for another oppressed group?


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## Qoph (May 17, 2009)

Lukar said:


> I'm thinking about going to school on Wednesday morning, picking up my report card, and immediately leaving. But right before I leave, I'll come out and say I'm bi to my friends. Good idea?



Is it your senior year?


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## Irreverent (May 18, 2009)

Lukar said:


> I'm thinking about going to school on Wednesday morning, picking up my report card, and immediately leaving. But right before I leave, I'll come out and say I'm bi to my friends. Good idea?



Hmmmm.   It wont leave time for much closure with your mates, they'll need time to absorb it; get their heads around it.


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## Zakavar (May 18, 2009)

I've had a serious roller coaster with my sexuality, and I've finally settled on the fact that I'm probably bi. >_>

Went in and out of the closet like 4 times, lol.  My parents have had an amazing amount of patience and understanding, lol.  It was kind of funny because while they knew my brother was gay from the start, they always pegged me as the straightest person they ever knew, and were convinced that it was just a phase for me, which I guess was kinda right.  They currently think I'm straight and I've decided not to continue to bother them with it, 'cause it's not really that big of a deal, XD  They said from the start that they want me to be happy and dont care who or what I end up with.

Unfortunately I do still feel like saying "Oh I'm bi." is kind of a cop out.  Especially since I do find myself more sexually attracted to men, but more in a...it's kinda hard to explain.  I dunno if i could really do it, it's like it happens in my head but I could never really go with it.  The more I actually have to type it out the more gay I feel. 

I just hope I find a guy to date seriously before I end up getting married so I can at least know for sure/experience it.  Unfortunately I'm out of college now and I was never able to find a gay guy that didn't creep me out. :[  And judging from my experience in the LGBT club at my school I dont think I can attend anything gay related without leaving in a panic.


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## Lukar (May 18, 2009)

Qoph said:


> Is it your senior year?



Haha no. I'll be a Sophomore in August.



Irreverent said:


> Hmmmm. It wont leave time for much closure with your mates, they'll need time to absorb it; get their heads around it.



Well, that's probably the best thing to do, now that my previous plans are ruined (I've decided to stay all three hours or so of that day- and even if I didn't want to, I have no way of getting to and from school that early). It's impossible for me to get them all together and tell them, so I'm going to call them one-by-one tomorrow night (I might start tonight, though; I'm not sure.) and tell them. I'm also breaking up with my girlfriend tomorrow, (I think of us more as friends, and every passing day makes me feel awkward) so... Yeah. This is gonna be one hell of a week.

EDIT: I just broke up with her... She said that because of things that happened to her in the past, it would take her a long time to actually _love_ someone, but atleast we're still good friends. Now I just have to spread the word about my sexuality.


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## xXWidowerXx (May 19, 2009)

Hello everybody. I danced around this topic before (the old one) saying I wasn't sure if I was.. y'know, gay.

Well, now I'm pretty damn sure I am. I still don't even want to write it, but I am. So, as a first step, I come out on this thread. lol...

I am awefully scared, and I know I would be rejected by my family. But I am in my senior year, and I won't come out to any of my friends... they'd probably hate me. At least at first, but most importantly, I know my best friend would. He's quite homophobe. So maybe I'll just come out once I'm in college, or something. Hell, this sucks. ):


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## Lukar (May 19, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> Hello everybody. I danced around this topic before (the old one) saying I wasn't sure if I was.. y'know, gay.
> 
> Well, now I'm pretty damn sure I am. I still don't even want to write it, but I am. So, as a first step, I come out on this thread. lol...
> 
> I am awefully scared, and I know I would be rejected by my family. But I am in my senior year, and I won't come out to any of my friends... they'd probably hate me. At least at first, but most importantly, I know my best friend would. He's quite homophobe. So maybe I'll just come out once I'm in college, or something. Hell, this sucks. ):



I'm sorry to hear that. If you need someone to vent to, feel free to PM me.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 19, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Well, that's probably the best thing to do, now that my previous plans are ruined (I've decided to stay all three hours or so of that day- and even if I didn't want to, I have no way of getting to and from school that early). It's impossible for me to get them all together and tell them, so I'm going to call them one-by-one tomorrow night (I might start tonight, though; I'm not sure.) and tell them.


Don't be a drama llama. Calling all of your friends is stupid. Just let it come up casually in a conversation.

'Hey, do you have a quarte-'
'No. I'm gay.'


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## Lukar (May 19, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> Don't be a drama llama. Calling all of your friends is stupid. Just let it come up casually in a conversation.
> 
> 'Hey, do you have a quarte-'
> 'No. I'm gay.'



Ehehe... Too late. ^^'

I called my friends and told them... One of them is in denial ("Trust me, you're not!"), and there are two people who I couldn't tell. Still, though, now that my friends know, I'm relieved. Plus, I think I might have a potential boyfriend. xD


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## Kryn (May 19, 2009)

Zakavar said:


> I've had a serious roller coaster with my sexuality, and I've finally settled on the fact that I'm probably bi. >_>
> 
> Went in and out of the closet like 4 times, lol.  My parents have had an amazing amount of patience and understanding, lol.  It was kind of funny because while they knew my brother was gay from the start, they always pegged me as the straightest person they ever knew, and were convinced that it was just a phase for me, which I guess was kinda right.  They currently think I'm straight and I've decided not to continue to bother them with it, 'cause it's not really that big of a deal, XD  They said from the start that they want me to be happy and dont care who or what I end up with.
> 
> ...



You remind me of myself a bit recently. Cept I never had the balls to come out to anyone yet  After thinking I was gay for the past 4 years I've found myself attracted to a girl that I recently started working with. I sorta like her and all my friends, who think I'm 100% straight, keep encouraging me to talk to her and get her number and eventually fuck her (cause that's all they care about, is that I get laid in the process).

Well I know I'm bi at this point, I mean I am attracted to her but I know it's not really what I want. When I think about what I would want from a relationship the answer is something not many women could give me.


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## Seprakarius (May 19, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> Hello everybody. I danced around this topic before (the old one) saying I wasn't sure if I was.. y'know, gay.
> 
> Well, now I'm pretty damn sure I am. I still don't even want to write it, but I am. So, as a first step, I come out on this thread. lol...
> 
> I am awefully scared, and I know I would be rejected by my family. But I am in my senior year, and I won't come out to any of my friends... they'd probably hate me. At least at first, but most importantly, I know my best friend would. He's quite homophobe. So maybe I'll just come out once I'm in college, or something. Hell, this sucks. ):


Yeah, it may seem scary, but you'd be surprised how well some people would take it. For the most part the only replies I got to coming out were "Yeah, so?" 

I can't say the same of my parents, who choose to remain blissfully unaware of the topic in spite of me blatantly coming out of the closet twice so far. But hey, ignorance seems to be bliss for the time being, and I'll let the issue flow out again when it may to avoid needless drama for now.

The most important thing I'd have to impart, though, is to get comfortable with who _you_ are, beyond how anyone may react to the fact. Trust me when I say self-acceptance goes a long, _long_ way toward increasing your own confidence and happiness.


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## Zakavar (May 19, 2009)

Kryn said:


> When I think about what I would want from a relationship the answer is something not many women could give me.



That kinda sums up me, there are girls I would really like to be with but I dont think there are many that could fulfill certains desires of mine.  Even if they could, I'd never be able to make myself ask since there's likely a 99% chance they'd leave me in a heart beat or who knows what.

Taking care of it in my own private time, if it would even be possible, probably wouldn't work either.  Judging from my own parents, you
A. Dont get much private time, and
B. I'm sure any accessory I could buy myself would be found and would end the same way asking about it would end.

So, yay?


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## Kryn (May 19, 2009)

Zakavar said:


> That kinda sums up me, there are girls I would really like to be with but I dont think there are many that could fulfill.  Even if they could, I'd never be able to make myself ask since there's likely a 99% chance they'd leave me in a heart beat or who knows what.
> 
> Taking care of it in my own private time, if it would even be possible, probably wouldn't work either.  Judging from my own parents, you
> A. Dont get much private time, and
> ...



Wow, that's exactly why I'm so reluctant to talk to this girl. I already own some accessories  and I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with anybody I couldn't be completely honest with. I know she'd probably be just grossed out and end it and tell everyone else how weird and gay I am.

Engh, at least then I wouldn't have to worry about coming out.


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## Sinister South Paw (May 20, 2009)

I really wonder what this compulsion to tell ones parents about ones sexuality is. I am pleased to say I don't have it. I wouldn't want to know about my parents sex life....why would they ever want to know about mine?


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## Takun (May 20, 2009)

Sinister South Paw said:


> I really wonder what this compulsion to tell ones parents about ones sexuality is. I am pleased to say I don't have it. I wouldn't want to know about my parents sex life....why would they ever want to know about mine?



You've never been hounded by a parent to get a girlfriend, get married, and pop out babies have you?


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## Endless Humiliation (May 20, 2009)

Sinister South Paw said:


> why would they ever want to know about mine?



holy shit there is no :lol: big enough for this






:lol:


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## Adelio Altomar (May 20, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> You've never been hounded by a parent to get a girlfriend, get married, and pop out babies have you?



To get a girlfriend? Still do by my mom. :|


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## Takun (May 20, 2009)

Load_Blown said:


> holy shit there is no :lol: big enough for this
> 
> 
> 
> ...



"Gee son, you and your roommate Billy sure have been living together for a long time.  Hasn't he found a girlfriend yet?"


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## Sinister South Paw (May 20, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> You've never been hounded by a parent to get a girlfriend, get married, and pop out babies have you?



Actually yes....and I told them I didn't want kids. They laughed, and I said "No really...I don't want life sucking parasites." My parents don't expect grand kids, my brother full filled that need for me.


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## Endless Humiliation (May 20, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> "Gee son, you and your roommate Billy sure have been living together for a long time.  Hasn't he found a girlfriend yet?"



You could just heap all the blame on him: "He's a QUEER!" and then say you're "Waiting for the right woman to come along."


AND THE CYCLE OF LIES CONTINUES


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## Sinister South Paw (May 20, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> "Gee son, you and your roommate Billy sure have been living together for a long time.  Hasn't he found a girlfriend yet?"



I'm more talking about teenagers wanting to "come out" to their parents. At that age...why go through that? Seems to me that your setting yourself up for failure and a good deal of misery. At the very least wait until you have moved out of the home and are living on your own to do it.


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## Takun (May 20, 2009)

Sinister South Paw said:


> I'm more talking about teenagers wanting to "come out" to their parents. At that age...why go through that? Seems to me that your setting yourself up for failure and a good deal of misery. At the very least wait until you have moved out of the home and are living on your own to do it.



Well, because then you aren't getting your parents hopes up for a long time?  If there were more people at my school, I might have came out then.  It'd be nice to have had it out in the open, instead of leading my parents along for 4 to 6 years.


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## Bambi (May 20, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Well, because then you aren't getting your parents hopes up for a long time? If there were more people at my school, I might have came out then. It'd be nice to have had it out in the open, instead of leading my parents along for 4 to 6 years.


Here are some other explanations.

People acquire the need to tell their parents about their sexuality, because of how society responds to homosexuality. They often times report their sexual feelings in order to feel as if they're being honest with themselves and other individuals. On the surface, it is a quest for self-acceptance and affirmation -- on the inside, it's the need to be loved and acknowledged for who they, or you, are.


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## Irreverent (May 20, 2009)

Bambi said:


> People acquire the need to tell their parents about their sexuality, because of how society responds to homosexuality. They often times report their sexual feelings in order to feel as if they're being honest with themselves and other individuals. On the surface, it is a quest for self-acceptance and affirmation -- on the inside, it's the need to be loved and acknowledged for who they, or you, are.



Very well said, sir.

I'd add, based on my own empirical review, that "coming out" to immediate family can also be a badge of validation for some.  A debutant-like event, so to speak.

Nothing I've ever felt compelled to do, but I'm starting to understand the whole concept a bit better.


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## Ceuper (May 20, 2009)

I can tell that my parents judge me being gay. They haven't brought it up once since I told them. When I did tell them, they just sort of said, "Okay, but you know that most people don't want to hear about other people's sexuality anyway. It's a private thing..." 

Like, okay, that's fine, except they didn't say that once while I had a girlfriend for two years. Sharing your heterosexual thoughts and attractions with people is perfectly fine, but as soon as it's gay people would rather not hear about it. Nice.


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## Bambi (May 20, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> I can tell that my parents judge me being gay. They haven't brought it up once since I told them. When I did tell them, they just sort of said, "Okay, but you know that most people don't want to hear about other people's sexuality anyway. It's a private thing..."
> 
> Like, okay, that's fine, except they didn't say that once while I had a girlfriend for two years. Sharing your heterosexual thoughts and attractions with people is perfectly fine, but as soon as it's gay people would rather not hear about it. Nice.


Precisely.

It's a double-standard, and most homosexuals for fear of alienation agree that other homosexuals should stay inside the closet and keep their lives private. It isn't ironic, because it's what you'd expect from someone whose trying to get accepted by acting humble.


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## Takun (May 20, 2009)

Irreverent said:


> Very well said, sir.
> 
> I'd add, based on my own empirical review, that "coming out" to immediate family can also be a badge of validation for some.  A debutant-like event, so to speak.
> 
> Nothing I've ever felt compelled to do, but I'm starting to understand the whole concept a bit better.



Also, with friends sex is brought up a lot.  When I was hanging with my friends it was always tits this, ass that.  I was invited to strip clubs and all that.  Whenever you turn down that, as a guy, it's always "what are you, gay?"

Well when you tell people other than your parents, you fear it will make it's way back to them and they'll get the wrong idea.  I personally wanted to talk to them about it, so they got it from me and not someone else.


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## Earendil (May 21, 2009)

I came out as gay when i was 23, but was in the closet since 16 or so. I was always different from the other guys, but couldn't put my finger on it. I had crushes on girls early on as well. I've finally accepted that, at PRESENT, I'm bi, and that sexuality is not as static as we've been taught all our life. It is possible to be emotionally attracted to one person, and sexually attracted to another, and all cases in between.

My aunt and uncle are bi and gay, so my dad wasn't too phased, but he had/has some weird conceptions, and I think he heard about/saw some bad things going down with his siblings explorations. He was worried about my shoving a lightbulb and weird objects up my rectum and not to experiment with stuff like that.  Weird. I'm like "you're talking to the kid who was raised a nice little Jewish boy". I'm still pretty "square" compared to my peers I think. Maybe that's just an old concept.

My mom says she still loves me, but she's still somewhat homophobic and it's saddening. These things take time I guess. My sister was very supportive, and my brother, after thinking and talking, is also very cool. They're all just worried about my safety w/AIDS etc, hate crimes, gay bashing etc. I think that's the thing my mom was most upset about, that I'd have it "so much harder". 

I just come out as gay cuz I didn't want to give mom hope for any kids. More honestly, I'm not ready/responsible enough for kids. Have enough difficulties being a responsible individual. When that changes, we'll see. I was at a fur convention recently, and was in close proximity to a 2-year old whining, crying, etc...I'm not ready.  I think I'd be one of those dads who'd always give their kid what they wanted, because he didn't want to be the bad guy, and I don't think that's good.

I'm not sure, but I think my ideal setup relationshipwise, would be something polyamorous. It's interesting...I expect to learn a lot about myself in the next decade. 

For all of you still in the closet...don't stay there too long. I've met 48 year olds who were still in the closet, and they're just shriveled up inside. Don't give your power away to other people. If your friends won't accept you for who you are...they're not your FRIENDS. They're people who will cut you down, hold you back, drain you of energy. GTFO. Get some distance, move to a bigger city. I just came back to my hometown, and the minute I stepped into my mom's house, it was like I was a teen again. Distance helps! If you have to come out when you're away, do it! It might be safer for both parties. If the parents aren't accepting, well, it's their fault for having the expectation that you'd be a certain person or "turn out" the way they wanted. 

You're not them, you are YOU. What do YOU want for yourself?

Get out of Small Town USA. Get out of Ultra Conservative Household as soon as you can. 
Running start program>Far Away University>Dorm

I spent 7 years in the closet, depressed, and lonely. I don't want anyone to go through that shit, especially if their situation is way worse than mine was (a lot are). 

Get out, meet new people, experience new things, learn, grow, and most of all love yourself.


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## DracoDark (May 22, 2009)

Earendil said:


> For all of you still in the closet...don't stay there too long. I've met 48 year olds who were still in the closet, and they're just shriveled up inside. Don't give your power away to other people. If your friends won't accept you for who you are...they're not your FRIENDS. They're people who will cut you down, hold you back, drain you of energy. GTFO. Get some distance, move to a bigger city. I just came back to my hometown, and the minute I stepped into my mom's house, it was like I was a teen again. Distance helps! If you have to come out when you're away, do it! It might be safer for both parties. If the parents aren't accepting, well, it's their fault for having the expectation that you'd be a certain person or "turn out" the way they wanted.
> 
> You're not them, you are YOU. What do YOU want for yourself?
> 
> ...



yes exactly.


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## whoadamn (May 22, 2009)

What scares me the most is even considering myself as such, damn, I have enough shit on the table as it is, but as the days progress I find a tendency to look towards the male side of the spectrum. Not only that, but it's not so much as "on the fence" as impaled in place "on the fence". Seriously, without some kind of bulldozer or fence-pulling rig, I'm going nowhere.

It's not that my family would be angry at me either, it's just I couldn't handle their knowledge of it, I have a feeling it'd cloud their perception of me as a person. Of course, should whoever I end up with happens to be of the same gender as me, I plan to move far-the-fuck away.

Iunno.


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## Revy (May 22, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> You've never been hounded by a parent to get a girlfriend, get married, and pop out babies have you?


 lol sounds like my family, but girls could never satisfy me like a guy can and I have no need for children.


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## iBolt! (May 22, 2009)

Here is a recommendation, mainly for teenagers who are in the closet: Read the book Geography Club. It was the BEST book I ever read!!! I loved it!!! I'm not even that big on reading.

Oh, and my friend Anders let himself out of the closet to his mom and grandma with my assistance. Reaction was a little delayed, but good 

And my friend Alec is gonna try to come out to the family tomorrow


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 22, 2009)

I think if my grandmother found out of me being gay she'd have a heart attack. She's a racist bigot whom I love very much. She's afraid of atheists and she thinks Obama is going to cause the downfall of all civilization.


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## Gaius_Baltar (May 23, 2009)

Adelio Altomar said:


> To get a girlfriend? Still do by my mom. :|


Yeah. my mom still wonders why I don't have a girlfriend yet, and sometimes jokingly points out girls when we're out somewhere for any reason.

What makes it worse is that I'm the only one left in the family that can carry on her father's last name
(my bro, ad 2 of my cousins have the last name.. but my 2 cousins are marries, intheir late 30's, and have no plans to have kids, and my bro is 22,and because f his selfisness and douche-baggery; he can't keep a girlfrind long enough.)

So my mom talks about how she can't wait for me to marry a woman and for her to have grandchildren.. and here I am, having been together with my loving boyfriend for 9 months now, who she thinks is just a frien x3


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## Seprakarius (May 24, 2009)

Oh, yes. The lineage issue. I'm in the thorny position of being the fourth of my line, which means I'm going to be breaking a long-standing chain. 

Oh well, not like I was really a child person anyway. x3


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## Loken (May 24, 2009)

whoadamn said:


> What scares me the most is even considering myself as such, damn, I have enough shit on the table as it is, but as the days progress I find a tendency to look towards the male side of the spectrum. Not only that, but it's not so much as "on the fence" as impaled in place "on the fence". Seriously, without some kind of bulldozer or fence-pulling rig, I'm going nowhere.
> 
> It's not that my family would be angry at me either, it's just I couldn't handle their knowledge of it, I have a feeling it'd cloud their perception of me as a person. Of course, should whoever I end up with happens to be of the same gender as me, I plan to move far-the-fuck away.
> 
> Iunno.



I was in much the same boat as your in right now.  I was in denial for a good four years until I just got sick of continually telling myself I wasn't gay.  

And as for the parents I am still in much the same boat as your in now.  However coming out to close friends was a good first step for me, so I would recommend starting with that. 

Good luck, keep us posted.


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## FrostByte421 (May 25, 2009)

I'm kinda in a dillema....  There was this girl I liked, around the time when I admited to myself that I was bi...., that worked at the same place I did... and during that time, things happened where I said to some co-workers that I liked her, and shit got around, and she confronted me about it, and I pussed out.

Then one day, she was a no call no show, and that was it.  Then about a month ago, she came back...  I talked to her a bit, and I wanted to ask her her number, though Im not going to get into detail, the story of what happened to her kinda caused me not to.  I told her, "well, stop in from time to time, I like seeing you"  havenet seen her since, though the Sheetz thats being built by my house, she is getting a job at...   I know she liked me, and I know she knew I liked her, now this is where the dillema comes in....

I am Bi, and I have been talking to this really cool guy who is a bit younger than I am, and is also a furry, and I think I might have feelings for.  I have been talking to him for a while, and I don't know what the fuck to do.  I am pretty sure he has feelings for me too, and being that I just admited to myself that I am bi... I am a bit confused.  I really dont want my family to know im a furry, let alone bi....  I dont know how they would handle it, let alone my friends.  Plus, I really like this chick too... and I know how it sounds, but I think we might have a chance...

IDK... I guess im just useing this as a venting thing.  I guess it just feels good to get it all out there, even to people you dont really know...


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## alicewater (May 25, 2009)

FrostByte421 said:


> I'm kinda in a dillema.... There was this girl I liked, around the time when I admited to myself that I was bi...., that worked at the same place I did... and during that time, things happened where I said to some co-workers that I liked her, and shit got around, and she confronted me about it, and I pussed out.
> 
> Then one day, she was a no call no show, and that was it. Then about a month ago, she came back... I talked to her a bit, and I wanted to ask her her number, though Im not going to get into detail, the story of what happened to her kinda caused me not to. I told her, "well, stop in from time to time, I like seeing you" havenet seen her since, though the Sheetz thats being built by my house, she is getting a job at... I know she liked me, and I know she knew I liked her, now this is where the dillema comes in....
> 
> ...


 

Dude, here's what you do. First try going for the girl, since you already know her and you now where she's working at now, start talking to her again and get her number. And when you feel ready ask her out on a date, but keep talking to your male friend too and let him know you knew her first and want to at least give it a fair shot with her. 

That way if things don't work out with her, he'll know ahead of time and dosn't think you're blowing him off for some chick and loses interest before you get a chance with him.


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## Phase (May 25, 2009)

Reading all of this makes me realize something: I'm a junior in high school, and I've already been through more crap than most adults ever will.

I have never lived in one place for more than 3 years (Army Brat) until just recently. I have been in the same town going on 5 years. I 'came out' in the summer between 6th and 7th grade. I don't even remember doing it. I just remember 6th grade liking my best friend (a girl), and the next year having discussions about the guys I like with the very same person. 

To be truthful, I've been gay for longer than I knew until a few years ago. My best friend (Who I don't get to see often anymore due to the moving. Different best friend. This one is a guy.) and I experimented since we were 5 years old. It amazed me when repressed memories came back and I realized that we were REALLY weird kids.

When I first came out, I lived in Colombia, South Carolina, Gang-Bangers central. It was kinda cool though. When I came out, I CAME OUT. EVERYONE knew. I went to a private school and passed notes with all the girls in my class. My teachers thought that I was a ladies man, but I got some notes taken up and my teachers knew I was gay. We had an annual trip to Washington, D.C. and one of my teachers confronted me about being gay, telling me that I needed to stop telling people that because the school was getting phone calls from parents stating that they didn't want their kids rooming with me because I was gay. It horrified me when I realized this. I was scared.

That, along with Hunter Pope bullying me, was my first encounter with people disliking me. there were many people that didn't like me, but I never really pieced together that it was because I was gay. At the end of 7th grade, we moved to McMinnville, TN. Never heard of it right? Too small to put on a map...jk. It's there, right around Murfreesboro. We moved to the smack-dab center of the Bible Belt because my mother grew up here. It was in 8th grade that I started seriously taking Martial Arts. My mother thought it was because I was just interested in it, but in truth, it was because I was afraid of getting the crap beat out of me. I didn't know a whole lot about the people who lived around here (namely Rednecks), but I did know that most people were biggist Christians.

At this time, I wasn't Christian, I was into a peagan (I know I butchered the spelling) religion, and my parents sent me to a private school. Not just any private school..........a Church of Christ private school. I mean no offence to Church of Christ or Christians, but that was the DUMBEST place I ever went to. It was retarded. I hated the whole year I was there. I came out there too. Even then, I was doing psychological researches. I was studying different approaches to getting a boyfriend (hadn't had one yet). My research didn't factor in whether or not the person was curious or bi or gay, so that research died, but back on track. Everyone there hated me (not everyone, but close enough) because I was gay. It wasn't so much a shock to me, and I didn't really care all that much because I had a few friends that didn't care to hang out with me. My friends (Alexander, Zach, and my cousin Lucas) were all use to being called gay. They were the out-cast. I wasn't afforded the opportunity to hang out with the cool kids. It hurt me, but I started thinking, "Why do I want to be a cool kid?"

In 9th grade, I switched to the public school (btw, if you are a parent and your kid is in a private school, I suggest sending them to a public school for high school. There are many more schoolastic opportunities there in my opinion.). The public school was full of biggist Rednecks. Sundrop (a fairly unknown soda to anyone outside of TN) is the biggest drink around here, other than any type of alcohol. I never got into Sundrop. People pretty much hated me because I didn't like Sundrop. If that doesn't tell you how narrow-minded these people are, I don't know what will. I was, and am, very opinionated, and then, and now, I am not afraid to let EVERYONE know how I feel about a subject.

I joined AJROTC. The 'A' stands for Army. There weren't a whole lot of Rednecks in AJROTC, so I made ALOT of friends. I generally became the guy everyone can go to for their problems. Everyone came to me. I wasn't going to keep it a secret that I was gay, so I let everyone know as the first thing I did when I met someone. Even in my classes with Rednecks, that was the first thing I did. I had a back-pack that was easily recognizable down the hall, and people began to hear word of "That gay guy in ROTC with the digital camo back-pack".

I walked down the hall with a strut in my step. I didn't care that everyone knew, but I wasn't going to act like a shy little kid that's easy to pick on. AJROTC helped me with this confidance. I wouldn't be confidant enough to be so open if it wasn't for AJROTC. People walked down the hall calling me "Faggot", "Fag", "Queer", and all sort of names like that, and it effected me, but I didn't really care. I went through a few boyfriends my freshman year, but none of them were more than a few days long. Not my fault, they just didn't work out.

I had a friend. He was, and still is, a devout catholic. At the beginning of our freshman year, he thought maybe he was bi, but decided, after being my friend and leading me on a little, that he wasn't. That sent me into a severe state of depression. I became Manic Depressive (or bi-polar) because of him. I'm over him now, but still Manic Depressive. Just to clear this up, bi-polar doesn't involve anger. It involves periods of extreme hyper and periods of extreme depression. I began to notice that I have mental problems around this time. It wasn't a fun realization, so I tried to ignore it. In short, Matt tore me up from the inside out. Everyone knew I liked him, and people pushed him to try and make him give me a chance, but as I'm sure you've pieced together, he never did.

My First Sergeant (here-on referred to as 1SG) was the biggest BUTT on Earth, but I liked him. He pushed me and made me feel like I was something, and yet nothing all at the same time. It's complicated, but I liked him better than my father. I later found out that he didn't like me because of how open I was with being gay. He tried at every moment to take things from me and treated me worse than everyone else not because he liked me like I though, but because he didn't like me, like everyone tried to tell me. I'm not very observant when it comes to people not liking me because I'm gay. I try and make excuses for them. I hate him now because he took away my positions (all three of them. Hard to get three positions like I did, but I pulled it off) because of one incident, but he gave others 1000 chances.

All of this time, from the year before I came out to now, I have been suicidal and depressive. I don't know why, it's just me and how I am. I had accepted the fact that I probably wouldn't kill myself, but recently, after a MAJOR break up with my boyfriend of 9 months, who I loved (if you knew me better, you would know that just me admitting that I loved him is a tremendous thing), I got majorly depressed. Around that time, I lost my positions in AJROTC. I went through three bad relationships after that. I became so VERY depressed, though I still had my days of mania, to the point that I wanted to kill myself. The only reason I'm still here is because my dad has a lock on all of his guns, and I forgot that my parents have enough medician in this house to kill an elephant. Please people, take it from the original Emo-kid, don't kill yourself. It doesn't matter how bad it gets, it'll probably get worse, but in time, it'll get better. 

My reason for saying all that above is because many people, including my parents, think that my depression came from me being gay. It had absolutely nothing to do with that. My depression came from biggist who put me down. I got over that and decided it was best to not care, so I became cold hearted. People liked me for that, oddly enough. I found this odd. I'm still depressive, but seeing a psychologist who eventually will tell me the exact same thing I already know.

I just thought that maybe someone out there wanted to hear my story. Maybe I helped someone. I don't know. If you have any questions about me, please feel free to message me and ask. If you have any problems, especially if you are in the closet (not a problem btw, just thought I'd throw that in there) please contact me. I will do my best to help.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 25, 2009)

That is a very large wall of text, you wrote there.

And your signature is very annoying.


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## Phase (May 25, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> That is a very large wall of text, you wrote there.
> 
> And your signature is very annoying.


 

I know it's long. That's really not even the half of all that went on.

And as for the signature...you aren't the first to commit on it.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 25, 2009)

I'm sure I'm not. It's extremely irritating. >_>


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## Aden (May 25, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> That is a very large wall of text, you wrote there.
> 
> And your signature is very annoying.



I thought it was an interesting read.

I do hate that pride-ish shit though. :T  Besides, it's not as if we're the type of group that needs to "get over it".


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 26, 2009)

> I thought it was an interesting read.


It _was_ interesting, I just said it was really long.



> I do hate that pride-ish shit though. :T  Besides, it's not as if we're the type of group that needs to "get over it".


Exactly. If someone here needs to 'get over it', then they're in the wrong fandom. Especially since only 39% of the fandom identifies as heterosexual.


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## Phase (May 26, 2009)

I see where you are coming from with the signature. It was more meant as a joke. I understood from my boyfriend that most of the people on this site were at least bi. This is actually my default signature lately for anything that requires a signature. Granted, you are right. Wrong place for this particular signature.


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## Takun (May 26, 2009)

By biggists, do you mean bigots?


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 26, 2009)

Probably. Unless he's referring to fat people.


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## Phase (May 26, 2009)

Yes. I mean bigots. Biggist is a private joke that I just forgot was a private joke.


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## bearetic (May 28, 2009)

Just changed facebook "Interested In" to "Men". FEELS GOOD, MAN


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## Kanin (May 28, 2009)

character said:


> Just changed facebook "Interested In" to "Men". FEELS GOOD, MAN


 
Lol, that's how Ceuper's parents found out about him. XD

Now, I'm bi, and family doesn't know. My dad is an idiot about anything homosexual, and doesn't think that bi-sexual is real. I'm not entirely sure how my mom would react. Also, I'm 15 so it could get complicated.

Any ideas? Tips? Anything would help.


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## angergod (May 28, 2009)

Oh, wait.  I was looking for the closets that the ZOMBIES put you in.  My bad


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 28, 2009)

Lord Kanin said:


> Lol, that's how Ceuper's parents found out about him. XD
> 
> Now, I'm bi, and family doesn't know. My dad is an idiot about anything homosexual, and doesn't think that bi-sexual is real. I'm not entirely sure how my mom would react. Also, I'm 15 so it could get complicated.
> 
> Any ideas? Tips? Anything would help.


Keep quiet until you're older. They won't take you seriously/think there's something wrong with you.


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## Phase (May 28, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> Keep quiet until you're older. They won't take you seriously/think there's something wrong with you.


 
I agree. My parents knew for a while, but they just recently approached me about it. They started it off with, "If you choose to keep going to route..." like it was something that I chose to get attention or something. They realized I meant business though when I said I am athiest. Broke their heart, but because they've persecuted me for most of my life for being gay, I don't care about them. They truely mean nothing to me other than a source of income.

Don't let this happen to you. Wait until you don't have to rely on them, or until they just flat out ask you. This is just something that you have to decide for yourself, but you can choose to hide it around the house or no. I never hid it (part of the reason they came to me about it) and invited my boyfriends over to my house. If you think your parents will hate you, then I'd hide it around the house.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 28, 2009)

Yeah. I didn't see a big deal about it recently until they said some pretty damn homophobic remarks. So, I dunno about what I'm going to do. I'll probably just wait a few years, or, at least until I'm out of the house and I'm SURE about my sexuality.

I don't want to come out as bi/gay now and then have to revise it later and say 'Oops, I was wrong. I am actually *blank*.'


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## ShiroRaven (May 28, 2009)

Heya I'm Bi myself and I still haven't told most of my family the only ones that know are my mom (no big shock to her) and a couple of my friends (which one is scared of me now). btw i'm from wetaskiwin,Alberta.


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## bearetic (May 28, 2009)

ShiroRaven said:


> Heya I'm Bi myself and I still haven't told most of my family the only ones that know are my mom (no big shock to her) and a couple of my friends (which one is scared of me now). btw i'm from wetaskiwin,Alberta.



Congrats on telling SOME family. My immediate family knows but are in denial (plus, they think it's a choice). I haven't told my extended family either, but I think my facebook might do some of that for me...

Sucks about your friend, though. lol at the same time



Lord Kanin said:


> Lol, that's how Ceuper's parents found out about him. XD
> 
> Now, I'm bi, and family doesn't know. My dad is an idiot about anything homosexual, and doesn't think that bi-sexual is real. I'm not entirely sure how my mom would react. Also, I'm 15 so it could get complicated.
> 
> Any ideas? Tips? Anything would help.



Ha, I remember about Ceuper. I followed the old thread for a while (but don't remember all the names >_<)

Anyway, it's totally up to you. I always hear people say "wait until you're financially independent." That's great advice, but don't rule out coming out.

I'd say get a feel for how your parents will react (it could be better or worse than you think). When the subject comes up, you _can _hold your opinions and argue them without coming out (though your parents may suspect it while you do). Kind of "educate" your dad that way, to be a bit presumptuous. Maybe that will help them warm up to the idea in time.

If you have gay friends, that might help you with support and your parents in becoming gay-friendly as well. That idea just came off the top of my head, though.

Again, it's all up to you.



ForestFox91 said:


> I'm afraid of my parents. Especially my mother... She goes ballistic at the smallest things.



No wonder you've had such a tough time of coming out. Bless your heart.



Earendil said:


> They're all just worried about my safety w/AIDS etc, hate crimes, gay bashing etc. I think that's the thing my mom was most upset about, that I'd have it "so much harder".
> 
> ...
> 
> For all of you still in the closet...*trimmed (great words BTW)*


Yeah, that's what my family's worried about. *Does anyone have advice on this?* That would be a good thing to discuss in this thread, risk of disease and anti-gay violence. I _did_ grow up with all this anti-gay information surrounding me, so I _am_ worried about this stuff, however dumb the questions may sound.

Also BUTTSEX. Even with (ideal conditions, here) 100% disease-free faithful life partners who use enemas, I don't know if I'd ever go without a condom for fear of feces.

Also, just for laughs, when I was younger, I used to worry that if I fulfilled my gay urges, I'd start walking and talking all queer XD

And, as I think we all have or will hopefully discover, being open about yourself is SO MUCH MORE FREEING than hiding. Ever since becoming open about being atheist, furry, and gay, there's NO looking back. I am a very happy person. (and it's less "coming out" as furry than just not hiding it anymore.)



TheGreatCrusader said:


> Yeah. I didn't see a big deal about it recently until they said some pretty damn homophobic remarks. So, I dunno about what I'm going to do. I'll probably just wait a few years, or, at least until I'm out of the house and I'm SURE about my sexuality.
> 
> I don't want to come out as bi/gay now and then have to revise it later and say 'Oops, I was wrong. I am actually *blank*.'



Sounds like it may be best for you to wait. Depends on what the remarks were, though. Keep feeling it out, and good luck! I'm no expert on coming out, though.

And, yeah, see, I thought I was sure about my sexuality until I came out as atheist. A bit later, I started having some feelings for women. Oy! Although I decided a while back that I'd tell people I was "mostly gay".  I'm never going to totally rule out a relationship with a woman.

I wouldn't wait until you're 22, like I did, but waiting a little bit so you can be sure of your sexuality sounds good.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 28, 2009)

> Sounds like it may be best for you to wait. Depends on what the remarks were, though.


It was stuff like my mom maliciously calling someone on TV a faggot (She said it very hatefully) or my dad saying that he hates gay people. It's not terrible stuff, but it's enough to scare me from coming out because I don't know what they'll think of me.



> And, yeah, see, I thought I was sure about my sexuality until I came out as atheist. A bit later, I started having some feelings for women. Oy! Although I decided a while back that I'd tell people I was "mostly gay".  I'm never going to totally rule out a relationship with a woman.


Well, I don't have to worry about religious crap because my parents already know that I'm agnostic. I came out to them a few months ago about it and they took it rough. They'd probably devastated if they found out that I was gay (That's what I think I am, it doesn't mean I am).



> I wouldn't wait until you're 22, like I did, but waiting a little bit so you can be sure of your sexuality sounds good.


I dunno. I don't want to miss out on a lot of things in high school and in college because I'm afraid of what people like my parents think. In that case, I'll be miserable for the next 6-8 years.


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## ForestFox91 (May 28, 2009)

character said:


> No wonder you've had such a tough time of coming out. Bless your heart.


Oh well really my biggest priority isn't coming out to my parents. My biggest priority was coming out to my best friend, and that had been taken care of, and boy am I glad to have that off my chest! Right now I really just want a guy to be with... it's hard to find anybody even in this state!


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## Lukar (May 29, 2009)

Alright, now I'm kinda scared to tell my family... The other day, my mom brought it up randomly, and my grandma went crazy. She said that if she ever found out someone was bi or gay, she would cuss them out and all that jazz every time she got a chance to.

I wasn't planning on telling my family any time soon anyways, but now I don't think I want to at all.


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## ForestFox91 (May 29, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Alright, now I'm kinda scared to tell my family... The other day, my mom brought it up randomly, and my grandma went crazy. She said that if she ever found out someone was bi or gay, she would cuss them out and all that jazz every time she got a chance to.
> 
> I wasn't planning on telling my family any time soon anyways, but now I don't think I want to at all.


Sadly that's how it is most places...


----------



## whoadamn (May 29, 2009)

Loken said:


> I was in much the same boat as your in right now.  I was in denial for a good four years until I just got sick of continually telling myself I wasn't gay.
> 
> And as for the parents I am still in much the same boat as your in now.  However coming out to close friends was a good first step for me, so I would recommend starting with that.
> 
> Good luck, keep us posted.


Oh this isn't a boat, it's a floating paradise full of all the necessities required to live a full and happy life. Thankfully, I can still look to a woman and find appeal in them, it's just, I'm more concerned on who the person is as opposed to what they are (not saying aesthetics aren't a bonus), giving me access to the ocean said ship resides upon. I've developed such a solid masquerade that going back on it could potentially ruin what people see me as, which is why I'm perfectly happy staying in this 'boat.'


----------



## bearetic (May 29, 2009)

whoadamn said:


> Oh this isn't a boat, it's a floating paradise full of all the necessities required to live a full and happy life. Thankfully, I can still look to a woman and find appeal in them, it's just, I'm more concerned on who the person is as opposed to what they are (not saying aesthetics aren't a bonus), giving me access to the ocean said ship resides upon. I've developed such a solid masquerade that going back on it could potentially ruin what people see me as, which is why I'm perfectly happy staying in this 'boat.'



I'M ON A BOAT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yfISlGLNU


----------



## Ceuper (May 29, 2009)

So I've come out to both of my parents and most of my friends and everything like that. It was basically entirely unspectacular. Half of them said they knew already anyway. 

So that's done and done, but I'm still trying to come to terms with being gay on my own. It's almost as if the one person I haven't truly come out to yet is myself. 

I think it's really about accepting it for me. It's not that I'm ashamed of myself whatsoever. I just have never considered myself truly gay (though I've come close), and now that I've stepped over that 'line', I'm trying to come to terms with it. I'm also really shy about talking about it with anyone in person. I think I'm mostly scared of how they might feel about me. Even if they know, I'm scared about other people judging me. I mostly blame that on my parents and their constant judgments of everything while I grew up (not just about me). 

I've yet to hang out with anyone outwardly gay, and the thought makes me a little nervous. In some ways I want people to know that I am, but in other ways I don't. Prancing the fact around in public makes me feel vulnerable and open to attack - especially considering that it's likely I'll get "FAG" yelled at me at some point in my life. I think I would get really flustered at that. I'm very sensitive. >.<; 

Anyone know what the hell I'm talking about? >.>


----------



## Eerie Silverfox (May 29, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> So I've come out to both of my parents and most of my friends and everything like that. It was basically entirely unspectacular. Half of them said they knew already anyway.
> 
> So that's done and done, but I'm still trying to come to terms with being gay on my own. It's almost as if the one person I haven't truly come out to yet is myself.
> 
> ...


 
Just don't look weird. If you are walking around in stilettos and have mascara and a five 'O clock shadow you deserve it.


----------



## Ceuper (May 29, 2009)

Eerie Silverfox said:


> Just don't look weird. If you are walking around in stilettos and have mascara and a five 'O clock shadow you deserve it.



I'm not really flaming. But there could easily (and will be) situations where I spend time with gay friends who ARE. Plus if I ever have a boyfriend I'd like to be at least a _little _affectionate in public, etc etc. 

I certainly don't want to hide the fact. =/


----------



## Aden (May 29, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> Plus if I ever have a boyfriend I'd like to be at least a _little _affectionate in public, etc etc.
> 
> I certainly don't want to hide the fact. =/



I'm still really bad at this. I'm always so nervous to show affection for my boyfriend in public, even at our college campus.

Not because I'm nervous or embarrassed, really. I just worry about him. He's not exactly the type that can take care of himself if things get physical.


----------



## bearetic (May 29, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> ...I'm still trying to come to terms with being gay on my own...
> 
> ***
> 
> ...





Ceuper said:


> I'm not really flaming. But there could easily (and will be) situations where I spend time with gay friends who ARE. Plus if I ever have a boyfriend I'd like to be at least a _little _affectionate in public, etc etc.
> 
> I certainly don't want to hide the fact. =/



THIS. Except I don't think I'd get flustered if all someone did was insult me for being gay. Now if they tried to get violent, then I might get flustered.

I'm "out" in name only right now. I've never expressed my sexuality in public, only talked about it. The people I've told at least act civil, if not accepting, when I talk about it, though, I fear what people would think if I kissed a guy or held his hand in public. Dirty looks and whispers and concealed hateful thoughts @_@

At least if someone says something to you, you can do something about it. With thoughts, you're left wondering and agonizing over this or that possibility...

Nevertheless, I've been preparing myself, visualizing the day when I boldly decide to hold hands with some future potential boyfriend walking across campus, or kiss him in the coffeeshop, or hug him in the cafeteria, etc... <3



Aden said:


> I'm still really bad at this. I'm always so nervous to show affection for my boyfriend in public, even at our college campus.
> 
> Not because I'm nervous or embarrassed, really. I just worry about him. He's not exactly the type that can take care of himself if things get physical.



From a skinny guy's POV, I'd say: _I_ won't spend _my_ life in fear, so don't be too scared for him.

Although I'm optimistic, naive, and careless. I think I should get _some_ muscle and learn _some_ self-defense just in case. Or at least get in running shape >_<

I asked another skinny guy who just graduated (like I should have) what it's like to be openly gay here. He said he had no troubles other than what he caused, mostly just getting adjusted his freshman year. 

Sure, Waco's not a small town, and Baylor has a lot of people from the big cities, and it's a pretty safe campus, and there are definitely more intolerant places than Texas, but it's still a Christian university in the Bible Belt. I'd wager if my flaming friend was OK here, you and your boyfriend are OK where you're at. I wish you both the best.


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## Zerethon (Jun 16, 2009)

I've been openly bi to people i know well for upwards of 3 years now, and my immediate family doesnt know either way, they'll figure it out eventually

Being in the middle of nowhere has it's advantages sometimes


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## Revy (Jun 17, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> I'm not really flaming. But there could easily (and will be) situations where I spend time with gay friends who ARE. Plus if I ever have a boyfriend I'd like to be at least a _little _affectionate in public, etc etc.
> 
> I certainly don't want to hide the fact. =/


pls dont be flaming (to the full extent, but having those kinds of "moments" are ok), its the reason why gays are looked down on anyway ._.


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## Kurama17 (Jun 17, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> I'm not really flaming. But there could easily (and will be) situations where I spend time with gay friends who ARE. Plus if I ever have a boyfriend I'd like to be at least a _little _affectionate in public, etc etc.
> 
> I certainly don't want to hide the fact. =/


 *Knows this is like, an extremely late post* x_X

Well, not all gays have to be flaming, but I tend to not hang out with a lot of flaming gays, although people in school do think of me as the most feminine straight guy in school, since I'm always flipping out about my hair for some reason -.-;;

But, I know this may be an off topic question, but...Why is it, that every black gay guy I know, is like, WAY too feminine? Do they like to try hard or something? 

BUt, trying to get back on topic....I don't see why there has to be a stereotype for gays and such, why can't people just like the same sex, and not have to act like the opposite sex? Then we could all be happily in the closet if we wanted to, to at least the public! =D


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## greg-the-fox (Jun 17, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> But, I know this may be an off topic question, but...Why is it, that every black gay guy I know, is like, WAY too feminine? Do they like to try hard or something?



Dude, I saw this black gay guy in Philly who was the most feminine guy I've ever seen. He was walking down the street exactly like a runway model. I swear, he was even doing these weird hand motions  And there's this black gay couple at my school, I've heard them talking behind me and they sounded exactly like (very enthusiastic) black girls until I turned around and saw they weren't.


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## Chessie (Jun 17, 2009)

I've liked girls since I was 10, but I didn't come out until a year ago telling my mother I was bi. She took it relatively ok, even though she said it might just be a phase. A month later I fell in love with this girl, and we became friends. After a while I understood she liked me as well and we hit it off. (We're still together today =3)
I came out to my brothers that I was bi a little after that, and they thought it was cool. I had a hard time telling my dad on the other hand (who is homophobic), I tried with hints, but he didn't get it. Then I asked him a question, "_What would you say if I got a girlfriend?_" He replied with an irritated voice "_I wouldn't like it!_" I have later told him that me and my girl are more then just best-friends and there was nothing he could do about it. And now he's really mean to her when she comes over or anything. 

In the autumn last year I came out to most of my friends, they all took it really well, and was being really supportive towards it and everything. So that was a relieve. And in February/March this year I came out as Lesbian. Which was scarier than when I came out as Bi for some reason. 
But everyone (except my dad) has taken the news well and have been really supportive.
I still have to come out to the rest of the family though, which I think isn't going to be that bad, even though I've got a really large family.


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## PriestRevan (Jun 17, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> I'm not really flaming. But there could easily (and will be) situations where I spend time with gay friends who ARE. Plus if I ever have a boyfriend *I'd like to be at least a little affectionate in public*, etc etc.
> 
> I certainly don't want to hide the fact. =/


 
PDA's are gross, no matter the sexual orientation or the extent you do them to.


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## wettfox (Jun 17, 2009)

well when i came out evry one was like HEY YOU GAY GUY YOU LIKE TO FUCK MEN HUH !!! and i thought fuck ehm and said fuck yeah i do !! eventhought im bi its hard to choose itl be an never ending battle between woman and men until a hurm or something meets me  but thats later i kknow have a flaming good relationship with a female and i love her so much the sex is good the cuddling and undressing stil makes me hot for her and im starting to think shes a furry to just to shy to ask  (and chessie im proud of you that you did it at such a young age i admire youre courage  )


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## Revy (Jun 17, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> But, I know this may be an off topic question, but...Why is it, that every black gay guy I know, is like, WAY too feminine? Do they like to try hard or something?


This is waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too true....


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## AshleyAshes (Jun 18, 2009)

I'm extreamly feminine but not flaming.  I suppose I'd be best described as 'Acting like a flat chested yaoi fangirl'. ...Which means people don't think I'm gay, most people think I have a vagina!  Which means geeky boys think I'm AWESOME... Till they realize there's no vagina.  Then they are awkward and frightened. 

Everyone knows I'm gay, my friends, my parents, buisnesses I work with.  No one cares.  I hang out with the girls in my circle of friends and basicly get dragged along with any of the 'chick stuff'.  Which once included being hauled into the women's restroom at a bar to chat while one of my chick friends was throwing up.  Awesome, no?

I've never taken any flak for being gay, no negative comments, harrassing words, never had to hide, never shyed away from holding a guy's hand in public.  I dunno what you guys are doin' wrong.

I once took a trip to Montreal, and in that trip visited the gay village, amongst other parts of the city.  When I got back and I said that Quebec was pretty neat, someone said "I guess you'd feel more accepted there."  I said "No I'm accepted here... But there breakfast comes with BOOZE! "

I thought my eggs and bacon would come with orange juice.  No one told me there was gonna be Champagne in the orange juice.  Viva Le Quebec!


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## Kurama17 (Jun 18, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> Dude, I saw this black gay guy in Philly who was the most feminine guy I've ever seen. He was walking down the street exactly like a runway model. I swear, he was even doing these weird hand motions  And there's this black gay couple at my school, I've heard them talking behind me and they sounded exactly like (very enthusiastic) black girls until I turned around and saw they weren't.


 
That's why I don't really go for black gay guys, since I think they're really girls, unless they were normal, but I haven't seen a normal black gay guy yet.



Revy said:


> This is waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too true....


 
It's fucking scary 



AshleyAshes said:


> I'm extreamly feminine but not flaming. I suppose I'd be best described as 'Acting like a flat chested yaoi fangirl'. ...Which means people don't think I'm gay, most people think I have a vagina! Which means geeky boys think I'm AWESOME... Till they realize there's no vagina. Then they are awkward and frightened.
> 
> Everyone knows I'm gay, my friends, my parents, buisnesses I work with. No one cares. I hang out with the girls in my circle of friends and basicly get dragged along with any of the 'chick stuff'. Which once included being hauled into the women's restroom at a bar to chat while one of my chick friends was throwing up. Awesome, no?
> 
> ...


 
Well, I'm glad you had the courage to come out to everyone, and that you're not getting any trouble. I really only truly came out to the people I know on the internet, because it's the internet, and the few close friends that know I'm into males, still think I'm bi, and it's actually kind of funny when they tell their friends that their gay friend is near, it's like they know, yet they don't.


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## AshleyAshes (Jun 18, 2009)

Courage?  What now? ;;;


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## vombatiformes (Jun 18, 2009)

Hm. Well. I came out as transsexual at fifteen to pretty much everyone. I was sort of way too eager to go on with transition to wait any longer. My parents wound up taking it well and I started testosterone at sixteen years old. I'm almost nineteen now.

Strangely enough, the gay thing wasn't quite as easy for them, as now that they accept me as their son they kind of wanted me to be a normal boy and date girls and everything, but you can't help who you're attracted to. xD

And in any case, I have a really great boyfriend that I've been with on and off for years now, so it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks.


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## Kryn (Jun 19, 2009)

AshleyAshes said:


> I've never taken any flak for being gay, no negative comments, harrassing words, never had to hide, never shyed away from holding a guy's hand in public.  I dunno what you guys are doin' wrong.



None of us are doing anything wrong, it's the general consensus of everyone around us. You sir, are just VERY lucky to live in such a tolerant area.

Try coming to southern Virginia and hold a guys hand while walking down the street and see how long it takes till somebody says something derogatory or worse tries to get violent.


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## Milo (Jun 19, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> That's why I don't really go for black gay guys, since I think they're really girls, unless they were normal, but I haven't seen a normal black gay guy yet.



am I the only one who finds black guys just as hawt as white guys?... seriously 0_o

ANYway, I came out to everyone LONG ago. I lost friends, I lost family, I gained a new outlook on life.


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## Koray (Jun 19, 2009)

Milo said:


> am I the only one who finds black guys just as hawt as white guys?... seriously 0_o
> 
> ANYway, I came out to everyone LONG ago. I lost friends, I lost family, I gained a new outlook on life.


You lost friend because you are gay?? Please, you're scaring me O.O


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## Milo (Jun 19, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> You lost friend because you are gay?? Please, you're scaring me O.O



arizona.... not the best state to be "gay" which is why I don't live there anymore


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## Koray (Jun 19, 2009)

Milo said:


> arizona.... not the best state to be "gay" which is why I don't live there anymore


Then maybe don't come in Greece... Things here go crazy if sb reveals he's gay or bi... And that's why the only person who nows I'm bi is my mother, and she still didn't take it good, even though she is open-minded


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## AshleyAshes (Jun 19, 2009)

Kryn said:


> None of us are doing anything wrong, it's the general consensus of everyone around us. You sir, are just VERY lucky to live in such a tolerant area.
> 
> Try coming to southern Virginia and hold a guys hand while walking down the street and see how long it takes till somebody says something derogatory or worse tries to get violent.


 
The last place I saw signifigant homophobia was in high school.  But then, I'm pretty sure that EVERY male in high school is called a 'faggot' *at least* once, reguardless of sexuality.

People eventually have to grow up because there's a lot of shit you can't get away with in the real world like you could in high school.


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## Kurama17 (Jun 19, 2009)

Well, I'm just waiting until I move to come out to everyone, so I don't ahve to deal with all the ghetto fucks around my area, since they're like, fucking annoying >_>


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## vombatiformes (Jun 20, 2009)

AshleyAshes said:


> The last place I saw signifigant homophobia was in high school.  But then, I'm pretty sure that EVERY male in high school is called a 'faggot' *at least* once, reguardless of sexuality.
> 
> People eventually have to grow up because there's a lot of shit you can't get away with in the real world like you could in high school.




People should eventually have to grow up, but they definitely don't always. :|

Gay bashing happens outside of highschool. :|


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## alicewater (Jun 20, 2009)

vombatiformes said:


> People should eventually have to grow up, but they definitely don't always. :|
> 
> Gay bashing happens outside of highschool. :|


 

True. Not too long ago me, some friends and my boyfriend were walking by a car that had been sitting in a parking ramp, and written on it someone had wrote: Burn in hell fag! Go fuck a woman! 

Needless to say we were pretty discusted, especially me and my boyfriend, with both of us being bi and all.


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## kjmars63 (Jun 22, 2009)

I came out to my mom when I moved from where I lived in Florida to where she lives in Colorado back in August of 08. I told her I was gay about 3 weeks after I moved in and she was not surprised in the least. Well I did draw gay furry art even before I knew what the furry fandom was. She ran across my drawings when I was like 13 and even then she wasn't negative about it. She actually told me, "You are a really good artist, but you should try drawing stuff that doesn't have cock in it so you can show it to others." I was surprised to say the least about it. And when I told her I was gay I was even more surprised about what she told me about herself. When she was in high school and in her early 20's she actually went out with other girls so she was Bi. Even more surprising yet she still admits that she is Bisexual. But since she is married to my stepdad, it kind of kept a secret from him. I actually told her about the furry fandom and even showed her other artists that draw yiff and she was rather intrigued about it. I showed her my old Wolf character sheet and joked to her she should draw a character sheet of herself as a furry, and she actually did. She drew herself as a Donkey. I am very lucky to have a mother who is very open minded about everything I am into. She still says that I should try to draw non yiff so I can show others how good of an artist I am. But coming out to my real dad... is a whole different story.


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## Kryn (Jul 3, 2009)

I finally told my sister and my brother-in-law I was bi last night. It took about 7 Heinekens before I could get the courage to say it and thankfully neither one of them seemed to care at all. I'm not sure how they would react if I brought a boy home with me one day but they told me I should be myself no matter what others think.

If I didn't have this hangover I'd probably feel really good right now lol


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## xiath (Jul 3, 2009)

I am getting closer to coming out, to my father at least.  Last night my father and I had a heart to heart on not doing drugs and while he was going along the lines of I can tell him anything and he won't judge me, he said something along the lines of 

"I know what it is like to be a teenager, and I know teens are subject to peer pressure and hormone changes, I just want you to know that you can talk to me about anything.  Like I don't know what your body is telling you, I don't know if you like women or men, but if you like men, I won't judge you because of it."

Which hit me by surprise because the whole conversation before hand had nothing to do about my sexuality and the conversation afterwards didn't eather.  I definably think he knows I am gay and is allright with it.


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## vombatiformes (Jul 4, 2009)

xiath said:


> I am getting closer to coming out, to my father at least.  Last night my father and I had a heart to heart on not doing drugs and while he was going along the lines of I can tell him anything and he won't judge me, he said something along the lines of
> 
> "I know what it is like to be a teenager, and I know teens are subject to peer pressure and hormone changes, I just want you to know that you can talk to me about anything.  Like I don't know what your body is telling you, I don't know if you like women or men, but if you like men, I won't judge you because of it."
> 
> Which hit me by surprise because the whole conversation before hand had nothing to do about my sexuality and the conversation afterwards didn't eather.  I definably think he knows I am gay and is allright with it.




Awwww. D: D: D:

Sorry that was just really sweet to read, haha.


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Jul 4, 2009)

Somehow, I think coming out completely over here will just lead to a whole lot of trouble. I'm tired of lying so much or having to come up with topic changes in coversations sometimes...

I already 'sorta' came out last November to a gay guy at my school and now he's in my summer classes doing all sorts of stereoptypical, flaming gay gestures at me from across the room while a room full of fellow Catholic Mexicans stare at him then me, trying to figure out what the Hell's going on between him and me.

Somehow, being beaten to death by complete homophobes sounds like a better deal compared to that.


----------



## TheGreatCrusader (Jul 4, 2009)

Adelio Altomar said:


> I already 'sorta' came out last November to a gay guy at my school and now he's in my summer classes doing all sorts of stereoptypical, flaming gay gestures at me from across the room while a room full of fellow Catholic Mexicans stare at him then me, trying to figure out what the Hell's going on between him and me.


I lol'd. :|


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## iBolt! (Jul 4, 2009)

vombatiformes said:


> Awwww. D: D: D:
> 
> Sorry that was just really sweet to read, haha.



Agreed. That was so awesome to read  From what I've read lately, I say it's a breath of fresh air.

I came out on my MySpace yesterday =P


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## Hir (Jul 4, 2009)

This thread is great. Thank you.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Jul 4, 2009)

Where Darkness Lies said:


> This thread is great. Thank you.


It helped me a lot in coming out to my best friend so yes it has been an immense help for me as well. Fur Affinity as a whole has been great help!


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## Hir (Jul 4, 2009)

I've always had trouble being true to myself, this thread has given me reassurance.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Jul 4, 2009)

Where Darkness Lies said:


> I've always had trouble being true to myself, this thread has given me reassurance.


same


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## PriestRevan (Jul 4, 2009)

So I recently came out to parents after thinking about it for a long time and reading through this thread...

they disowned me. I mean that quite literally. Good job guys.

This whole "coming out" thing made me feel so much better.


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## Adelio Altomar (Jul 5, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> So I recently came out to parents after thinking about it for a long time and reading through this thread...
> 
> they disowned me. I mean that quite literally. Good job guys.
> 
> This whole "coming out" thing made me feel so much better.



"Coming out" is overrated anyway.


----------



## PriestRevan (Jul 5, 2009)

Adelio Altomar said:


> "Coming out" is overrated anyway.


 
I thought that too... however, all the "successes" here made me change my mind. 

Too bad, I should've stayed in that closet.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Jul 5, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> So I recently came out to parents after thinking about it for a long time and reading through this thread...
> 
> they disowned me. I mean that quite literally. Good job guys.
> 
> This whole "coming out" thing made me feel so much better.


Optimism can sometimes be a great thing. Others... it gets us into trouble. We tend to wish for the best for each other... Your sarcasm is frowned upon, by me at least... 

I'm not out of the house yet so I don't dare come out any time soon to my parents. I don't expect it to turn out well either. I would just like to say blaming others isn't going to help your situation.


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## PriestRevan (Jul 5, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> *Optimism can sometimes be a great thing. Others... it gets us into trouble. We tend to wish for the best for each other... Your sarcasm is frowned upon, by me at least... *


 
I could care less if my sarcasm is frowned upon. This thread didn't help me at all.

Freakin' people are so useless.

Edit: And blaming others is gonna make me feel better. If it wasn't for all the success's here, I wouldn't have attempted it. This thread is pretty much useless at what it was made for.


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 5, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> I could care less if my sarcasm is frowned upon. This thread didn't help me at all.
> 
> Freakin' people are so useless.
> 
> Edit: And blaming others is gonna make me feel better. If it wasn't for all the success's here, I wouldn't have attempted it. This thread is pretty much useless at what it was made for.


then leave... All we ever try to do is help...


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## PriestRevan (Jul 5, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> then leave... All we ever try to do is help...


 
And your help is lame. >:c


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 5, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> And your help is lame. >:c


*cries in corner*


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## shakyartist (Jul 6, 2009)

I have seen troubles with this stuff before. Although I personally am straight, I do have 2 friends that have came out to me. I have one friend that is a girl named Taylor and she told me she was bi over AIM. And more directly my friend Zach told me in person that he was bi. Although they are both bi they both prefer the same gender


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## xiath (Jul 6, 2009)

Great news!!!  Tonight I have come out to my father (or more he asked me), and he is fine with it and he said he has my back when I decide to come out to everyone else!  I can't describe how happy I am.


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## Hir (Jul 6, 2009)

xiath said:


> Great news!!!  Tonight I have come out to my father (or more he asked me), and he is fine with it and he said he has my back when I decide to come out to everyone else!  I can't describe how happy I am.


I wish I had the courage to do that... Inside I know my family would understand but I just don't have the courage to say it.


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## xiath (Jul 6, 2009)

Where Darkness Lies said:


> I wish I had the courage to do that... Inside I know my family would understand but I just don't have the courage to say it.


I didn't to tell you the truth.  But he had suspected for years and last night he finally asked me.

he said "so whats up between you and *one of my female friends*?"  

I said there was nothing between us.

He then asked "What about you and *my best friend (male)*?"

I again said there is nothing between us.

He then said "I can tell by the way you are looking at me that you want me to ask the other question."

I smiled a little.

He said "Are you?"

I replied yes.

He then said "I thought so.  I have thought so since you where young, maybe 10.  I am happy to finally know the truth."

He then went on a rant about how he knows that people are born gay and how stupid the idea of "becoming gay" is.

Unfortunately, the rest of my family don't have the same views so the hardest part is yet to come.  At least I have my father on my side now.


----------



## Hir (Jul 6, 2009)

But you still told him. I wouldn't have been able to.


----------



## bearetic (Jul 6, 2009)

Congrats, xiath, and sorry, Priest. Things don't always turn out well.

My family threatened to kick me out a couple weeks ago if I "insisted" on being gay (yeah, they think it's a choice), so I didn't lie and say I wasn't, but I said I could wait. I said "we'll see what happens." At least I got some mercy and can finish college.

Hopefully I can kinda soften them in the coming year, or however long it is before I end up maybe leaving home. Gotta brush up on my homo apologetics.


----------



## Lukar (Jul 8, 2009)

I'm determined to tell my mom that I'm bi by the end of next week... She fully believes the Bible and shit, but I "accidentally" put my orientation on MySpace as unsure, and she saw it. She told me she says "Reject the sin, not the sinner," and would support me if I was, so... Yeah. =/ I just hope she wasn't saying that to make me feel better at the moment.


----------



## Jashwa (Jul 8, 2009)

Lukar said:


> I'm determined to tell my mom that I'm bi by the end of next week... She fully believes the Bible and shit, but I "accidentally" put my orientation on MySpace as unsure, and she saw it. She told me she says "Reject the sin, not the sinner," and would support me if I was, so... Yeah. =/ I just hope she wasn't saying that to make me feel better at the moment.


 Lying is a sin :v.  Just tell her that you're completely homo like you are.  I'm sure she'll understand.


----------



## Lukar (Jul 8, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Lying is a sin :v.  Just tell her that you're completely homo like you are.  I'm sure she'll understand.



I know lying is a sin to Christians, but since I'm not religious, I don't really care.  And I'm not COMPLETELY fag... But I don't find girls interesting that much, and don't want to date them. If that makes any sense.


----------



## Jashwa (Jul 8, 2009)

Lukar said:


> I know lying is a sin to Christians, but since I'm not religious, I don't really care.  And I'm not COMPLETELY fag... But I don't find girls interesting that much, and don't want to date them. If that makes any sense.


 Says the guy that goes "eww" when we post pictures of boobs.


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## Lukar (Jul 8, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Says the guy that goes "eww" when we post pictures of boobs.



Again, I'm just not interested in them. x3 They don't really turn me on, lol. In fact, I kinda think they're gross for some reason, hah.


----------



## Jashwa (Jul 8, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Again, I'm just not interested in them. x3 They don't really turn me on, lol. In fact, I kinda think they're gross for some reason, hah.


 Meaning you're a complete fag, not just partial .   I'm just kind of lobbying to try to get yout o stop lying to your parents so much lol.


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## Lukar (Jul 8, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Meaning you're a complete fag, not just partial .   I'm just kind of lobbying to try to get yout o stop lying to your parents so much lol.



Fine. x3 And I try not to lie to them if I can... I only lie if I have to.


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## Koray (Jul 8, 2009)

@Lukar & @Jashwa
If lying was a mortal sin, then everyone would go to hell x_x

and:

Actually,as I see it, you can do more things -sexually- with a man, than you can do with a woman x_x


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## Lukar (Jul 8, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> @Lukar & @Jashwa
> If lying was a mortal sin, then everyone would go to hell x_x
> 
> and:
> ...



Exactly. x3

Anyways, I'm still going through with my plan to tell her I'm bisexual by the end of next week.


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## Jashwa (Jul 8, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> @Lukar & @Jashwa
> If lying was a mortal sin, then everyone would go to hell x_x
> 
> and:
> ...


I was making a joke with that. Hence the :v trolling/whatever it means face. 


@your second point, no way.




Lukar said:


> Exactly. x3
> 
> Anyways, I'm still going through with my plan to tell her I'm bisexual by the end of next week.


 Pathologicalliarsayswhat?


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## Chessie (Jul 8, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> Actually,as I see it, you can do more things -sexually- with a man, than you can do with a woman x_x




Um, what do you base that statement on?


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## TheGreatCrusader (Jul 9, 2009)

His experience with a person he has sex with 5 times a day whose called Mr. Hand.


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## Lukar (Jul 9, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> His experience with a person he has sex with 5 times a day whose called Mr. Hand.



Har har.

Alright, I'm gonna tell her this Friday... I'm gonna go with her to take my bro and sis to their dad's in Knoxville, and on the way back, I'll tell her.


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## Revy (Jul 10, 2009)

Gotta get my bf to come out to his family, just that his mom happens to be in the military as do i >< pretty high rank as well...

this gonna be hard but I'll be there holding his hand if and when he decides to tell them.


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## Lukar (Jul 10, 2009)

Revy said:


> Gotta get my bf to come out to his family, just that his mom happens to be in the military as do i >< pretty high rank as well...
> 
> this gonna be hard but I'll be there holding his hand if and when he decides to tell them.



Good luck, man. =3 I'm rootin' for you guys.

Ugh... Telling my mom tomorrow. x-x I keep telling myself that I shouldn't tell her, but I'm forcing myself to.


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## Hir (Jul 10, 2009)

I'm coming out to one friend at a time, and each time I do, I feel so much better.

Oh and off topic, Lukar has LEET posts! Congrats!


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## Asmiro (Jul 10, 2009)

I'm still amused at how many of my friends I mindfucked with my facebook quiz with the last question being about my sexuality: "Hetero" "Gay" "Bi" "Bi-leans more towards men" "Bi-Leans more towards women" Awkward, confused rage ensued shortly after posting the quiz. Thankfully none of them care and I got a good laugh out of it. :3


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## Lost~Koneko (Jul 10, 2009)

Wow, come back from two weeks in Florida and find all sorts of new stories on here.  Good luck Lukar, let us know how it turns out with your mom.


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## Jashwa (Jul 10, 2009)

Asmiro said:


> I'm still amused at how many of my friends I mindfucked with my facebook quiz with the last question being about my sexuality: "Hetero" "Gay" "Bi" "Bi-leans more towards men" "Bi-Leans more towards women" Awkward, confused rage ensued shortly after posting the quiz. Thankfully none of them care and I got a good laugh out of it. :3


...I feel like I should know this, but what was the answer?

Also, good luck today Lukar!  Don't get b& from life.


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## Lukar (Jul 10, 2009)

Where Darkness Lies said:


> I'm coming out to one friend at a time, and each time I do, I feel so much better.
> 
> Oh and off topic, Lukar has LEET posts! Congrats!



Glad it's working out for you. =3 And HELL YEAH, MUTHAFUCKERS.



Lost~Koneko said:


> Wow, come back from two weeks in Florida and find all sorts of new stories on here. Good luck Lukar, let us know how it turns out with your mom.





Jashwa said:


> ...I feel like I should know this, but what was the answer?
> 
> Also, good luck today Lukar!  Don't get b& from life.



Thanks, guys. ^^ I was originally not gonna tell her after all because she's gonna be busy tonight, but oh well. I'll let her know as soon as she's done.


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## Lukar (Jul 11, 2009)

Well, that was certainly fun. =/ According to my mom:

1) I am too young to know what I am (Bullshit)
2) Me being bi will make my life harder (True, but seriously, mom. Not THAT much.)
3) I need to talk to a pastor or therapist. (I refused, she got mad and said that I have no choice)

Oh well. Atleast she told me she loves me, and that she'd never disown me.


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## xXWidowerXx (Jul 11, 2009)

Um, so... My internet was down for a week, and then a lot of crazy stuff happened like graduating and going to New York for a week and then I kind of lost track of this thread but suddenly I'm back. I feel bad because I keep randomly popping up. But anyways, hello. I think I'll try to keep updated on this thread consistantly this time.


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## xXWidowerXx (Jul 11, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Well, that was certainly fun. =/


 
Sorry it didn't go so well... but at least she said she won't disown you. I guess she'll probably be in denial :c


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## Lukar (Jul 11, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> Sorry it didn't go so well... but at least she said she won't disown you. I guess she'll probably be in denial :c



It went well, I just wish it went better. x3 Yeah, probably. =/ Thanks, though. :3


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## Xenke (Jul 11, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Well, that was certainly fun. =/ According to my mom:
> 
> 1) I am too young to know what I am (Bullshit)
> 2) Me being bi will make my life harder (True, but seriously, mom. Not THAT much.)
> ...



There are so many things wrong with this, seriously :/

1) Bullshit.
2) Yea, so? Happiness is more important than being something you're not.
3) Why? Being Bi isn't some sort of crisis or something. Talking to these people shouldn't change how you feel.
4) Why the hell did disowning even come up in the conversation?


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## blackfuredfox (Jul 11, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Well, that was certainly fun. =/ According to my mom:
> 
> 1) I am too young to know what I am (Bullshit)
> 2) Me being bi will make my life harder (True, but seriously, mom. Not THAT much.)
> ...



damn, well atleast it is off your chest, and also do you feel better? final note:chose the therapist, usually more understanding.


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## TheGreatCrusader (Jul 11, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Well, that was certainly fun. =/ According to my mom:
> 
> 1) I am too young to know what I am (Bullshit)
> 2) Me being bi will make my life harder (True, but seriously, mom. Not THAT much.)
> ...


Well, I certainly believe that about myself and I'm 15. Don't say that 'I definitely know what I am and I'm not moving out of that' this early in your life.


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## Jashwa (Jul 11, 2009)

*hugs Lukar*

Yeah, it could've went better, but at least you had seppy there to try to help you say things better.  

I still think you'll be able to convince her eventually that it's not a disease and you dont' need a therapist for it, even with how deluded she is.


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## emoral (Jul 12, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> Hello everybody. I danced around this topic before (the old one) saying I wasn't sure if I was.. y'know, gay.
> 
> Well, now I'm pretty damn sure I am. I still don't even want to write it, but I am. So, as a first step, I come out on this thread. lol...
> 
> I am awefully scared, and I know I would be rejected by my family. But I am in my senior year, and I won't come out to any of my friends... they'd probably hate me. At least at first, but most importantly, I know my best friend would. He's quite homophobe. So maybe I'll just come out once I'm in college, or something. Hell, this sucks. ):



hey im new to this forum but been reading about the artwork and everything all day, i'm pretty sure i'm in the same situation as your in and it's hard to explain it to my family and mates but i think i'ma just wait til college because college is much more of an accepting place rather than secondary / high school, everyone i know has no clue that i'm gay so it's difficult. Great website btw dudes and dudetts awesome artwork i get the impression all of you lot are a great bunch of people


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## Arcadium (Jul 14, 2009)

This thread helped me out a lot when coming out to my friend. Cheers for Takumi.


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 14, 2009)

Well I've finally met a guy that I'm going to have coffee with this weekend ^^
and we might hit my place for some VIDEO GAMES!!!


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## Jashwa (Jul 14, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Well I've finally met a guy that I'm going to have coffee with this weekend ^^
> and we might hit my place for some VIDEO GAMES!!!


 Video games?  So that's what you gay, I mean guys, call it these days.  

I kid I kid.

Congrats, hope things go well.


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 14, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Video games?  So that's what you gay, I mean guys, call it these days.
> 
> I kid I kid.
> 
> Congrats, hope things go well.


lol thanks


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## JosephRaszagal (Jul 15, 2009)

I'm from Kentucky, so I've pretty much only come out to my close friends. Everyone down here that's above the age of thirty is either slightly homophobic or extremely homophobic >.< The south blows, and no, not in the cool way.


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## Kangaroo Fist (Jul 15, 2009)

JosephRaszagal said:


> The south blows, and no, not in the cool way.


This^ (even though there are some exceptions)

When I was 16 I think, I came out to my deeply christian and blindly republican parents who have lived in Texas their entire life, I got slugged in the face by my dad and thrown out of my house that second, luckily I had my car keys, they refused to talk to me and I lived at my grandparents who thankfully respected my orientation even if they thought it was just a phase. I'm very happy I busted my ass in school and got a full ride to the University of Texas (GO LONGHORNS) The people in Austin are a lot more respectful than at my hometown where I got into many fights about my orientation. (My parents told some other parents and word went around)  Some of you guys are very lucky to have such understanding parents it's such a blessing.


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 15, 2009)

Kangaroo Fist said:


> This^ (even though there are some exceptions)
> 
> When I was 16 I think, I came out to my deeply christian and blindly republican parents who have lived in Texas their entire life, I got slugged in the face by my dad and thrown out of my house that second, luckily I had my car keys, they refused to talk to me and I lived at my grandparents who thankfully respected my orientation even if they thought it was just a phase. I'm very happy I busted my ass in school and got a full ride to the University of Texas (GO LONGHORNS) The people in Austin are a lot more respectful than at my hometown where I got into many fights about my orientation. (My parents told some other parents and word went around)  Some of you guys are very lucky to have such understanding parents it's such a blessing.



Awe man I hate stories like this, because I fear that's how it'll end up for me


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## Kangaroo Fist (Jul 15, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Awe man I hate stories like this, because I fear that's how it'll end up for me


 Don't worry man, it's very rare from what I've been told and seen, most parents that are angry when ya come out usually remember who they are talking to. The topic may taboo but they usually accept it with time.


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 15, 2009)

Kangaroo Fist said:


> Don't worry man, it's very rare from what I've been told and seen, most parents that are angry when ya come out usually remember who they are talking to. The topic may taboo but they usually accept it with time.


My parents are machines of rage that conform to thoughts of the masses...


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## Kangaroo Fist (Jul 15, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> My parents are machines of rage that conform to thoughts of the masses...


Both my parents hated me deeply (I overheard them discussing this before) for my "hippy views" and (I'm not kidding about this) "supporting Al-Qaeda and the terrorists" It's just coming out was the Final blow to our relationship I don't consider them my parents anymore and I know they made sacrifices for me but when I was in my teens the disliked me more and more because my views were so different from theirs and my siblings thanks to the good old interwebs. So don't worry the relationship with my parents was a total train-wreck and I'm sure any decent parents wouldn't abandon their child just to conform to the masses.


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 15, 2009)

Kangaroo Fist said:


> Both my parents hated me deeply (I overheard them discussing this before) for my "hippy views" and (I'm not kidding about this) "supporting Al-Qaeda and the terrorists" It's just coming out was the Final blow to our relationship I don't consider them my parents anymore and I know they made sacrifices for me but when I was in my teens the disliked me more and more because my views were so different from theirs and my siblings thanks to the good old interwebs. So don't worry the relationship with my parents was a total train-wreck and I'm sure any decent parents wouldn't abandon their child just to conform to the masses.


man... that's terrible...


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## Jashwa (Jul 16, 2009)

Kangaroo Fist said:


> Both my parents hated me deeply (I overheard them discussing this before) for my "hippy views" and (I'm not kidding about this) "supporting Al-Qaeda and the terrorists" It's just coming out was the Final blow to our relationship I don't consider them my parents anymore and I know they made sacrifices for me but when I was in my teens the disliked me more and more because my views were so different from theirs and my siblings thanks to the good old interwebs. So don't worry the relationship with my parents was a total train-wreck and I'm sure any decent parents wouldn't abandon their child just to conform to the masses.


 Why do you "support Al-Qaeda and the terrorists"?


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## Kangaroo Fist (Jul 16, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Why do you "support Al-Qaeda and the terrorists"?


I don't it's because I hardly agree with anything they say and they blindly supported anything president bush/clinton or the media said. (They love fox news) It's just because I didn't agree so therefore I support the terrorists.


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## Jashwa (Jul 16, 2009)

Kangaroo Fist said:


> I don't it's because I hardly agree with anything they say and they blindly supported anything president bush/clinton or the media said. (They love fox news) It's just because I didn't agree so therefore I support the terrorists.


 I put it in quotes meaning "why do they think you do?".  And also, I can see why your coming out went so bad if _they're _those kind of people.  I'm sorry for you.


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## Kangaroo Fist (Jul 16, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I put it in quotes meaning "why do they think you do?".  And also, I can see why your coming out went so bad if _they're _those kind of people.  I'm sorry for you.


Thanks, I've kinda put it past me but it's been bottled up so it really helps.  I kinda expected it to go bad but not as bad as it did.


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## Takun (Jul 16, 2009)

Kangaroo Fist said:


> I don't it's because I hardly agree with anything they say and they blindly supported anything president bush/clinton or the media said. (They love fox news) It's just because I didn't agree so therefore I support the terrorists.



Oh hey, mine too.  My dad thought for the longest time that I was some DAMN LIBERAL.


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## Arcadium (Jul 16, 2009)

Well, I guess I want to type now .


Okay, I'm Bi. "I know I'm not Straight", is *better* though. I might be on the line of being bi and going bi in theory. Because Guys look a lot better then girls, but i'm not gonna say that there weren't girls i thought looked good.

About a month and a half ago, I came out of the closet to my friend, Makayla. Part of it was from reading the Previous thread, and I took that step by step, but ended it at telling my friends. I live in a small town that doesn't have it's own High-School, so my friends ended up going to different schools. I came out to the last one person wanted to tell yesterday. So, the list reads, Makayla, then her Boy Friend that's one of my close friends, Nathaneil. My best friend (We do everything together, hang out every weekend, etc), and my other Close Friend. So, 4. Plus the only other Gay kid from my grade that I could talk to about the subject of coming out, since he did it himself this year.

Now, I'm fine with being who I am. I really don't care what others think either. Of course, parents don't aren't part of that. I know my father too well. A very insane, biggoted toward anything homosexual. Fat, pasty white guy. Irish. You can picture him from that. The type of dude that will stare at people diffrent then him, espically gays, with the biggest fucking evil eye.

My plan to come out to Family, is far from now. I aim to do it when I'm financially stable, out of college (or at least paying on my own with no help from them), and with a Mate. I plan to come out to my mother first, by having her meet me and him private somewhere. My dad, is the only factor that scares me though. My dad publicly speaks out against Gays, Gay rights, how marriage is Sacred, etc. And I've gotten into huge arguements with him of me getting sick of it and how he should get a soap-box and STFU. Not only that, He's a Pshyco path! I'd be afraid of him killing my mate if he takes it at the worst possible scenario

So, I have reason to want to do it at a later time.

The only worry I pose is, *what if they find out*? I plan to do something with a guy within the next 4 years on my venture to HS next semmister. I'm not going to sit around and wait, if i can get some. Again, I'm not afraid to be who I am. However, this would be top-secret. I'd establish it firm with friends I make in HS, that if they don't want to get murdered, they STFU about it around my folks.

I'd say I'm at about, 85% sure I'd be kicked out, or locked into my room. If i got locked into my room, I'd GTFO. But then, probably not be welcomed back. Unless my mom helps me out, which I hop to god she would.

But what if they find porn? See me holding hands, or necking? Idk, something of that matter. I'm not gonna sit in deinal, to there expense, but I'd rather have them not know.


Any advice, tips, anything of that matter, I'd appreciate on the highest level.



Sexualities suck. I wish there was no Gay, Bi, Strait, etc. It was loving who you wanted to love. Sadly it doesn't work that way. .


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## xXWidowerXx (Jul 16, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Oh hey, mine too. My dad thought for the longest time that I was some DAMN LIBERAL.


 
God I hate politics ;_;
My grandparents who live with me + my family are very much so into politics i.e. bitching about anything their talk radio does. (Which is DAMN LIBERALS.)

Me, personally, I don't care. I have nothing to do with politics.



ForestFox91 said:


> Well I've finally met a guy that I'm going to have coffee with this weekend ^^
> and we might hit my place for some VIDEO GAMES!!!


 
That's excellent, hope you enjoy yourselves. Tell us how it goes!


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## Hir (Jul 18, 2009)

I just did what I thought impossible. I finally came out to the other website I go to all the time, and pretty much all of them are OK with it.

I feel so much better now.


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## Jashwa (Jul 18, 2009)

Where Darkness Lies said:


> I just did what I thought impossible. I finally came out to the other website I go to all the time, and pretty much all of them are OK with it.
> 
> I feel so much better now.


 Congrats!


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## Koray (Jul 18, 2009)

Where Darkness Lies said:


> I just did what I thought impossible. I finally came out to the other website I go to all the time, and pretty much all of them are OK with it.
> 
> I feel so much better now.


WAY TO GO!!!!

Last night I was out with two of my friends, and we were talking about random things, when we reached the word "bi"; I SO had on the tip of my tounge the phrase "I am bi!!!", but WHY DIDN'T I SAY IT?!?! T_T

Because I'm a fucking  pussy, that's why <_< >_>


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## KaiFox (Jul 18, 2009)

EDIT: Whoops, kind of the wrong topic. And I guess I will delete it because I feel pretty foolish now lol.  Sorry.


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## xXWidowerXx (Jul 19, 2009)

NO?


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## Takun (Jul 19, 2009)

Family shouldn't make family feel bad about being themselves.  I've gotten used to that.  I refuse to live a shitty life for myself so that others can feel happy.

Took me 20 years to realize that.


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## KawaiiHusky (Jul 19, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> I'm really torn right now :/ I'm in a "pivital moment" in terms of my story.
> 
> Well, let me start off by mentioning today my dad giving me a lecture on dating girls. I don't mean an angry one or anything, he was just telling me basically not to be afraid to ask girls out lol. I just... I felt awkward during, but...
> 
> ...




Well all I can say is fuck them all. (sorry for the language)I mean think of your happiness and don't care about the others. If you care to much of what other people think about you, you are going to miss out in a big part of your life.


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## SaberLeopardess816 (Jul 23, 2009)

I'm came out two months ago, as I'm Bisexual / Lesbian, actually more Lesbian than Bi, but I still like it with guys, now and then, but still prefer girls of the same type!


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## ShadowWeaver (Jul 23, 2009)

I figure I'll come out to my parents once I'm no longer listed as a dependent on there tax forms. Should be in about 2 more years.


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## SaberLeopardess816 (Jul 23, 2009)

My parents were real cool about it! They loved it!
I feel fortunate!
I hope it works out for you**hugg's**


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## ShadowWeaver (Jul 23, 2009)

SaberLeopardess816 said:


> My parents were real cool about it! They loved it!
> I feel fortunate!
> I hope it works out for you**hugg's**



It might, but I'm not taking any chances. After all, I was born and raised in the Bible Belt of the south. It's scary down here. *hides in fetal position*


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## TheGreatCrusader (Jul 23, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> I'm really torn right now :/ I'm in a "pivital moment" in terms of my story.
> 
> Well, let me start off by mentioning today my dad giving me a lecture on dating girls. I don't mean an angry one or anything, he was just telling me basically not to be afraid to ask girls out lol. I just... I felt awkward during, but...
> 
> ...


If your father really cares about you he'll accept you for who you are. Unless he's sociopathic, no matter how much he has a distaste for gays, he'll accept you and what you want to do with your life.

That's just my opinion. I say go for it.


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## Koray (Jul 27, 2009)

I came out to my cousin... She took it pretty well. She even asked me which boys I liked x_x


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## Hateful Bitch (Jul 27, 2009)

Where Darkness Lies said:


> I just did what I thought impossible. I finally came out to the other website I go to all the time, and pretty much all of them are OK with it.
> 
> I feel so much better now.


mhmm. I saw <:

Good thing you did, because now we talk so much more now and you introduced me to this site.

I haven't come out totally. Never said "I'm gay" or anything yet out loud. I don't come across as gay, but I do really when I'm not hanging around with friends.

Came out to my parents by having a little guessing game as to why I looked so frightened and just said "Yes" after my mum guessed all kinds of things like "You're hearing voices?". I guess I'm even harder to read than I thought. D:

One friend I told on MSN, so I didn't _say _it. Another friend who found out ont he webs is just on the same forum as me and I'm more open about it there, so he inadvertently found out.

Another one who found out was my friend's sister. I was at his house and we were just sitting around the living room and then she showed me this sketch of a bee she made, then I stupidly said "Yeah, I saw it on dA", knowing full well she didn't know I knew her on it. She asked my name and I saw no harm in it, so I told her. She thought that the oppertune moment to look me up on her watcher list. She visited my page and immediately read my Journal entry I have displayed. If you read it, it says I'm gay, so she found out and asked "You're gay?", I answered truthfully. But my friend was too busy with Brawl to notice, thank God.

But my innability to say it aloud even to myself has me cornered for now. ;_;

/walloftext

Advice would be wonderful if you have some.


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## shakyartist (Jul 27, 2009)

Well I'm bi but I've only dated girls (They're my preferance) but I have half came out to my friend Amanda (I told her about an "experiance" I've had and she seemed fine about it) but haven't flat out said it yet. The problem is, she's kind of a homophobe =/


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## jabberjackalope (Jul 27, 2009)

I know this thread is mostly about coming out as gay or lesbian or bi, but I just came out as trans and that was hard. 
Most of the LGB community don't really care much for the trans community. They feel like we are traitors and it's frustrating. I told my parents and I'm starting to take Testorone (I'm female to male) and they just ignore the elephant in the room. 
But I'm happy that I"m finally able to be myself. 
And to anyone who is feeling alone, you aren't. Obviously this thread is an indication of that. We're all behind you.


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## Takun (Jul 27, 2009)

jabberjackalope said:


> I know this thread is mostly about coming out as gay or lesbian or bi, but I just came out as trans and that was hard.
> Most of the LGB community don't really care much for the trans community. They feel like we are traitors and it's frustrating. I told my parents and I'm starting to take Testorone (I'm female to male) and they just ignore the elephant in the room.
> But I'm happy that I"m finally able to be myself.
> And to anyone who is feeling alone, you aren't. Obviously this thread is an indication of that. We're all behind you.



It's not that, really.  It gets hard when people try to tie homosexuality as a mental disorder and having transexuals linked in honestly makes it an easier target.


Good for you though, I can't imagine that would be easy at all.


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## Hateful Bitch (Jul 27, 2009)

jabberjackalope said:


> I know this thread is mostly about coming out as gay or lesbian or bi, but I just came out as trans and that was hard.
> Most of the LGB community don't really care much for the trans community. They feel like we are traitors and it's frustrating. I told my parents and I'm starting to take Testorone (I'm female to male) and they just ignore the elephant in the room.
> But I'm happy that I"m finally able to be myself.
> And to anyone who is feeling alone, you aren't. Obviously this thread is an indication of that. We're all behind you.


mhmm. I'm not trans and wouldn't take it as a way of life, but I'm not against the idea and would gladly do it myself. Not sure what that would make me, if anything, but I just say I'm gay, because it would be more like a passtime and I'm not full trans I guess.

I see no issue with it, though. <:


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## ForestFox91 (Jul 29, 2009)

well I'm out to my parents... My mom actually got on my comp found got in my gmail inbox and found my posts here on FAF :/

July 23, 2009 She called me at work yelled at me, I told her that I have to work, but she constantly called me back. So she picked me up during lunch and we yelled at each other for a good hour. She didn't take it well to say the least. Well she told my dad and said I would be in big trouble with him. I wasn't afraid of my dad however, in fact he still accepts me. My mom made me go to a therapist little would she know that the therapist would be on my side 
So it's been rough...


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## husk3h (Aug 2, 2009)

I'm bisexual and have been dating my wonderful boyfriend for almost a year and a half now. I told my mom by accident. We were washing the dishes, and it was just us. She noticed I was wearing a necklace that my boyfriend got me and she asked me where I got it (I'm not one for jewelry). I told her who got it for me, she asked why, and without thinking I said "It's for our 6 month anniversary." There was lots of tears and the rest of the day was awkward. A few weeks later I told my dad. The silence following was the most awkward time of my life.

Thankfully, they have both taken it well. There hasn't been any arguments or anything about it, and they never try and stop me from seeing him.


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## Ishmale (Aug 5, 2009)

Seprakarius said:


> I've been securely out of the closet for a few months now. My friends know I'm gay, and I'm more than comfortable with the fact and what it means for me.
> 
> Now, actually getting into a relationship is proving somewhat troublesome. I lack "gaydar" and tend not to give off signs myself, so finding anyone else proves to be difficult. Nevertheless, I have been on a few dates with other guys, though all of these pursuits fallen apart for some reason or another. My last one was the most promising yet, but between looming distance and the fact that things were getting pushed too fast, I let that one go too.
> 
> Not sure what I'm getting at here, though. I'm not discouraged or mopey or anything, just stating the facts. xD



ditto its not a violent world just sometimes cruel by being so lonely.


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## FanaticRat (Aug 9, 2009)

So, I'm still mostly in the closet since I've only told a select few people I know, but I planned on coming out in college (and only at college until I work up the nerve to tell my family) as people on this site have encouraged me--I don't mean, like, putting a rainbow on my room and some of my stuff (although I might get the flag, I dunno) or really telling people, just...admitting it freely when people ask and not be afraid to ask out guys and such or attend gay-pride events, y'know? I would think it'd be a lot better than being in the closest as I am now and knowing most of my family wouldn't accept it, which especially sucks as they've got a lot of pride in me for going to college.

But I'm moving in in about six days and...I'm getting cold feet.

Honestly, I've been looking forward to this but now that going away is almost here, it just scares me. I mean, I don't know. I really am afraid my roommate will take it badly (and I've really no info on his opinions on such things; I've only e-mailed him thrice and I've been too afraid to ask him in that medium if he would be okay with it) and that I'd be ostracized, but even more so am I afraid of homophobic violence. I mean, I'm not that tough of a guy, to be honest--I can throw a good punch but I don't really fight--and the thought of some guys ganging up on me...shit. 

I don't get it. I keep thinking that'll be just like when I came out before, but now it'd be to a lot of people I don't know and not one person who I really trust, so it doesn't feel nearly the same. And then I'm afraid of such info leaking to my parents, and I don't even wanna think of what they'll think of finding out their son is bi and alone, unsupervised at college. Ugh.

I feel like such a fucking coward, seriously. I thought I could do this...


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## SpetsnazFox (Aug 10, 2009)

Hm I first came out to my mum earlier this year, I was very nervous but she had absolutely no problems with it. Later she said it to my brother and he also took it easy. I even came out to one of my grandparents and they also got over it. But I'm afraid my other grandparents wouldn't take it so easily, I think they would rather throw me out of their house 

But the hardest part were some RL friends which I've known since elementary school, they made alot of homophobic comments before I told them so I was really worried. But I now think they're OK with it, even if I still think they somehow fear my presence will turn them gay magically <.< 

Well, I'm going to come out to my school class aswell soon, I'm so tired of all these "omgwtf?! where is your girlfriend?" comments


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## Ishmale (Aug 10, 2009)

I came out to my mother first. She cried.
Then my best friend who told my old ex-girlfriend for middle school, who proceeded to go down her phone book and tell everyone she knew. People in Florida knew before I knew he had told her. Anywhozits, then I told my sisters, one laughed one nodded. And finally my dad, he still thinks it's just a phase. Yeah, good time so far in this life. ^_^


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## Lukar (Aug 10, 2009)

I don't think many people from school know still. =/ However, the ones that do know can talk about it in public if they want, but otherwise, I'm not telling anyone else for awhile. Also, my mom hasn't had another talk with me about it yet.


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## Jashwa (Aug 10, 2009)

Lukar said:


> I don't think many people from school know still. =/ However, the ones that do know can talk about it in public if they want, but otherwise, I'm not telling anyone else for awhile. Also, my mom hasn't had another talk with me about it yet.


 Obvious by the fact that you're not B& from life.


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## Ackslawsin (Aug 11, 2009)

I came out to my friends twice. First time I thought I was bi, second time, well, it's obvious. They're pretty cool with it. Don't have the balls to come out to my family.


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## Jashwa (Aug 11, 2009)

I'm thinking about coming out as bi to my best friend.  I'm not sure if he'd be cool with it or not, though.  He says things that are homophobic, but he acts really gay sometimes so he may just be trying to cover because I come off as a homophobe too x3.


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## Greyscale (Aug 12, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I'm thinking about coming out as bi to my best friend.  I'm not sure if he'd be cool with it or not, though.  He says things that are homophobic, but he acts really gay sometimes so he may just be trying to cover because I come off as a homophobe too x3.



If he is your best friend, he should be cool with it. If not...


I came out to a friend today I haven't seen in over a year. He was surprisingly accepting.


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## Lukar (Aug 12, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I'm thinking about coming out as bi to my best friend.  I'm not sure if he'd be cool with it or not, though.  He says things that are homophobic, but he acts really gay sometimes so he may just be trying to cover because I come off as a homophobe too x3.



That Chris dude you mentioned earlier?


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## Jashwa (Aug 12, 2009)

Lukar said:


> That Chris dude you mentioned earlier?


 Yeah, lol.


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## KaiFox (Aug 12, 2009)

Yesterday I came out as bi to both my best friend and my mom, and they're both cool with it. My friend said that "the furry thing was a bigger deal than this, and even that wasn't a big deal at all", and my mom told me that "you're still my son and you're still the same person to me". So they're both really accepting and couldn't care less about it. I can trust the two of them with anything, and it's comforting to know that.

I flat out refuse to tell my dad that I'm bi for the time being because he was raised Catholic and is a racist homophobe, and he shows it. So I'll hold off on telling him. I'll tell my 12 year old sister when she's a couple years older.



Jashwa said:


> I'm thinking about coming out as bi to my best friend. I'm not sure if he'd be cool with it or not, though. He says things that are homophobic, but he acts really gay sometimes so he may just be trying to cover because I come off as a homophobe too x3.


 
Jashwa, if he's your best friend then he should be just fine with it. How well do you know him? If you think that you can trust him, then go for it. It's something that you need to think over more, but you should be able to reach a decision soon.


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## Lukar (Aug 12, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Yeah, lol.



I'm sure he'll understand. =P


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## Koray (Aug 12, 2009)

2 things happened today:
1) A friend came by, and saw a yiff picture x_x
2) I told the same friend about a singer that is bi. 
He asked "lol, he is going with both males and females?" 
Me: "Yes"
Him: "That's insane"
Me: "I dunno"
Him: "Well, that's insane, would you do it?"
Me: "umm, I don't know, maybe x_x"
Him: "omg, Nick, stay away from me" (joking)

I don't think he took it seriously >_>


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## Lukar (Aug 12, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> 2 things happened today:
> 1) A friend came by, and saw a yiff picture x_x
> 2) I told the same friend about a singer that is bi.
> He asked "lol, he is going with both males and females?"
> ...



How'd the picture go? o-o

Well, atleast he was joking. =P I'm sure he loves you either way.


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## Koray (Aug 12, 2009)

Lukar said:


> How'd the picture go? o-o
> 
> Well, atleast he was joking. =P I'm sure he loves you either way.


I think I showed you that pic yesterday at the chat, I think... or maybe you guys skipped it >_>

I hope so, and awww :3


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## Lukar (Aug 12, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> I think I showed you that pic yesterday at the chat, I think... or maybe you guys skipped it >_>
> 
> I hope so, and awww :3



Lol, Idk. I know you posted one picture. =P

If he didn't freak out or anything, then he'll more than likely still be your friend. ^


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## tox-foxx (Aug 12, 2009)

I've never officially came out to my parents, but I'm sure they are aware I'm not fully straight. They just don't really care. And seeing as I see it as my own personal business, they don't really need to, unless I get a girlfriend. But seeing as I'm engaged to a guy (he is well aware I'm bi), I doubt that will be an issue. XD

As for friends, I don't bring it up. I will never deny it if asked, but like I said before... who I'm fucking is my own personal business, so it doesn't come up much. Those who have asked, know. But some don't, and they don't really care, either.


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## Ishmale (Aug 12, 2009)

Sinister South Paw said:


> I really wonder what this compulsion to tell ones parents about ones sexuality is. I am pleased to say I don't have it. I wouldn't want to know about my parents sex life....why would they ever want to know about mine?



This is a rather common misconception. You are not telling them about your sex life. You are telling them about you. You do not have to be sexually active to be gay. but most parents expect grand kids along the way. So even if you have not had sex but do not feel attracted to women (and are a male) best to let em know. Again being a homosexual does not mean you are sexually active. It just means you are simply attracted to the same sex. :grin:


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## Ishmale (Aug 12, 2009)

Hitman344 said:


> Yesterday I came out as bi to both my best friend and my mom, and they're both cool with it. My friend said that "the furry thing was a bigger deal than this, and even that wasn't a big deal at all", and my mom told me that "you're still my son and you're still the same person to me". So they're both really accepting and couldn't care less about it. I can trust the two of them with anything, and it's comforting to know that.



congrats. Very cool for you.


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## Koray (Aug 12, 2009)

tox-foxx said:


> I've never officially came out to my parents, but I'm sure they are aware I'm not fully straight. They just don't really care. And seeing as I see it as my own personal business, they don't really need to, unless I get a girlfriend. But seeing as I'm engaged to a guy (he is well aware I'm bi), I doubt that will be an issue. XD
> 
> As for friends, I don't bring it up. I will never deny it if asked, but like I said before... who I'm fucking is my own personal business, so it doesn't come up much. Those who have asked, know. But some don't, and they don't really care, either.


Well, I always thought that bi girls were more accepted in society, so I don't think that would be a problem for you =P


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## Reggy-Renegade (Aug 13, 2009)

i've come out as bi to a few of my close friends, and some others have already figured it out. Some even before i did! XD but i'll never have the guts to come out to my family: homophobic hardass christians.


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## Jashwa (Aug 14, 2009)

I told my best friend I was bi today, and he was REALLY surprised.  I kind of used to be a homophobe (closetindenialsayswhat what?).  He was cool about it, and it didn't stop the many gay jokes we make, so I'm happy.


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## Superfoxy (Aug 16, 2009)

Wow, Hitman, that's great! It's good to hear that your mom and sister are okay with it. To be honest, I had wondered about you. Huh. 6 days ago. Must get around the forum MOAR.

I recently admitted to myself that I was bisexual. It was about two weeks ago. But I've been in denial about it for over a decade. It was the exposure to the fandom that finally helped do it. The people here are very open with their sexuality. Hmmmm...

Decides whether or not to post a secret for the sake of personal therapy.... Okay.

Exhibitionist therapy is exhibitionist.

I suppose my first gay thought was about in 98-99. I was 13-14-15 then. I had a dream that an older male friend of mine was raping me and I liked it. Yeah. Kinda fucked up. That disturbed me more than a little. After that, the gay thoughts never stopped, and kept coming up again from time to time.  I just didn't want it, so I felt horrible for it and tried to tamp it down whenever I could. So apart from wanking to gay thoughts, or, later, watching gay porn on the net, and sometimes using toys, I repressed it. And I never did anything with a real guy. Because that would confirm it. And I could NEVER, EVER let that happen, as I saw it. I just didn't want to be a faggot. So I was always tortured by what it would mean if I did like men. Looking back now, it makes me sad because of all the great guys I might have missed out on. I always felt like there was something wrong eith me and I was some sort of deviant or perverted freak. And I thought that I could I could just cut out the gay thoughts and focus on liking women. But apparently my brain doesn't want to be retrained in that way. They say that the definition of stupidity is doing the same thing over again and expecting a different result. But sure enough, that's what I was doing. My internal narrative went something like:

Narrator 1: You're not a dumb animal, and you have self-control, so you don't have to like guys if you don't want to. Just work on cutting out the gay thoughts.

Narrator 2: That guy is cute.

Narrator 3: SHUT UP!

I didn't think of being bi as as an option. To me there was just non-gay, and gay. And I didn't want to be 'one of them'. I was never really explicitly hateful, but now that I look back at it, I was kind of homophobic with how I looked at it. I didn't have as many reasons as some others here with regards to it had for staying in the closet. This is a very tolerant city, amd my parents didn't have religion, so I grew up free of it. But I still looked at gayness in a bad way. To me gays were just perverted freaks who couldn't control themselves and be normal. So it was like something I was always trying to cut out with a rusty knife, and failing every time. 

As far as my preference goes, it's something like 70-80% women, and 20-30% men. I still far prefer women, but I also find guys hot. I like things with boobies and I like things with the peen. I find both sexes aesthetically pleasing, each in their own way. It took me a long time to wrap my head around that, but I have now. I don't know if I can fall in love with a guy, but I'm open to finding out now, and I can't know unless I'm open to the possibility, otherwise I might just smother it when it comes up. But the idea of being able to love a guy was always FAR more terrifying than the idea of being fucked in the ass. But anyways, I feel much more comfortable in my own skin now. 

I'm kind of a loner, and I don't have any close friends, so I haven't told anyone in real life. And as for my family, well, I'm not very close to them anyways, because I'm very different from them, so I don't want to add that to the mix and make the disconnection worse. But I have come out on my Internet forums, and I haven't got any shit for it yet, which is good. I've also been talking on IRC about it, and it has made me feel easier. So, if I had to summarise this into a couple of sound bites, they would be:

1) The greatest repression can always come from inside your own mind.

2) You are not defined by your sexuality.

I really hopes this helps any other bi people on FA who are struggling with this. And please, if you have any relevant experiences to share, then please post here.

FEED THE THREAD!

Thank you, everyone for sharing what you did.


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## KaiFox (Aug 16, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius said:


> Wow, Hitman, that's great! It's good to hear that your mom and sister are okay with it. To be honest, I had wondered about you. Huh. 6 days ago. Must get around the forum MOAR.


 
Well, I came out to my mom and my best friend, not my sister. I'll tell her when she's a bit older (like a year or two from now since she's only 12 atm). But thank you! ^^

And congrats to you as well! Glad to hear you were able to figure it out.


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## Superfoxy (Aug 17, 2009)

Hitman344 said:


> Well, I came out to my mom and my best friend, not my sister. I'll tell her when she's a bit older (like a year or two from now since she's only 12 atm).



Lol, sorry I screwed that up.



Hitman344 said:


> But thank you! ^^



You're welcome Hitman344. I hope you feel better.



Hitman344 said:


> And congrats to you as well! Glad to hear you were able to figure it out.



Thanks! Yeah, it took a long time for me to figure out how not to base my sexual identity on cliches or cultural norms. You can be as masculine as hell and still like the cock. I just couldn't wrap my head around that for the longest time.


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## Bloodshot_Eyes (Aug 17, 2009)

Hi, I'm Kuro and I'm an alcoholic... wait, no I'm not!
I think I might be... dare I say it? bisexual. (Dun dun dun)
I'm definitely not coming out 'til I know for sure but... *sigh* I don't know. >.>


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## Koray (Aug 17, 2009)

Well, I came out to my mom that I have a boyfriend. She didn't take it very well, but she says that she understands and wants the best for me!


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## Lukar (Aug 17, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> Well, I came out to my mom that I have a boyfriend. She didn't take it very well, but she says that she understands and wants the best for me!



I'm glad she understands. ^^


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## Cuddlez (Aug 17, 2009)

When I was younger I sorta just pushed sexuality to the saide, mainly the straight kind. But as I got older I found myself stareing at everyone.

It wasn't untill I had my first sex dream (That involved a girl and guy that I knew) that I figured out I was Bisexual/ pansexual.

I came out to my mom about a year ago, turns out she figured out before I did. As for public in town wise, I'm not saying it. Mainly cause I live in a town where a gay man got his face shattered (Along with various other bones) less then a block from my house.


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## Varulven (Aug 20, 2009)

Reading this thread makes me wanna come out and tell every1 I'm bi :/ I'm another one of those people with the close minded family so I would probably get disowned since I live with my dad (who like a lot of others is a racist homophobe) I think my sister and my mom would be ok with it but I would rather tell everyone at once for some reason. As for my friends, they're all huge homophobes (like the kind that love to get violent over anyone who's gay) so there's no way I'm telling them. It is hard to hang out with them but really they aren't bad people if you know them. From reading advice here though I think I'll just wait untill I finish highschool.


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## Benn (Aug 21, 2009)

Its always nice, and surprising, to see the number of furs in these chats.   Evidently, I'm gay (though I prefer the term "no vagina thank you"), and that was supposed to mean banishment to fiery depths by my schools standards , so I kept things on the DL.   But now school's done, Im heading to University, and I can be more honest now that there's a more liberal and accepting audience.   Most of my family prefers things... Old Testament... so I think I'll wait a while before breaking the news.
All of my friends know, so thats around 42 people, and of course anyone who reads this and tracks me back to my facebook


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## Benn (Aug 21, 2009)

Dude! Yes, 'Peg-Power! *fist-bump*


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## Remy (Aug 22, 2009)

Well, my friends were a bit easier to come out to, we were all sitting at the lunch table and I just said to them, "I have something serious to talk about with everyone." and it went on from there, turns out they...really didn't care. XD But it felt good to get it off my chest.

More so recently, I came out to my mom in March, it was a bit awkward because we had been arguing before it all came tumbling out (My mother kept pestering me that 'something was wrong with me, and I really needed to talk') I kept this from my mom since I was sixteen, because I really didn't know how she was going to take it. 

She took it rather well, and said that she'd still love me and all that other mushy crap. That the world is different today and that she is keeping an open mind.


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## Reggy-Renegade (Aug 26, 2009)

I want to tell my parents. I really do. But i know that there is no way that they would be okay with it. My mom has point blank said (not knowing about me of course) that parents don't really love their gay children. They just act like they are okay with it so that they don't seem like bad parents.


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## Nick (Aug 27, 2009)

I don't see the need to tell parents things like that. It's not something that I'd want to discuss with them or that I'd want them to know. If they find out then, so be it.


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## Takun (Aug 27, 2009)

Nick said:


> I don't see the need to tell parents things like that. It's not something that I'd want to discuss with them or that I'd want them to know. If they find out then, so be it.



You've never been pushed by family *constantly* by family to have children/grand children?  If that's so, you won't understand.


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## Reggy-Renegade (Aug 27, 2009)

Oh jeeze, that's the worst.


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## Benn (Aug 28, 2009)

Remy said:


> She took it rather well, and said that she'd still love me and all that other mushy crap. That the world is different today and that she is keeping an open mind.


 
The whole "still love you" tidbit is worrying me... example: 
"I kicked a puppy"
-->"oh, I still love you"
The context is a little unclear in most situations...


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## An Sionnach Rua (Aug 28, 2009)

I was discussing this a while ago with a gay guy I know. I asked him whether or not he had told his parents, and he asked why they would need to know. I don't see why anyone other than the person you're having sex with needs to know what your orientation is.


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## Hir (Aug 28, 2009)

An Sionnach Rua said:


> I was discussing this a while ago with a gay guy I know. I asked him whether or not he had told his parents, and he asked why they would need to know. I don't see why anyone other than the person you're having sex with needs to know what your orientation is.


Depends. Do you have pushy parents and family who are constantly badgering you to get a girlfriend and get married like the perfect little person you are? If so, that would obviously start making you want to tell them where you stand. It's also nice to talk to those you trust about how you are just for the comfort knowing that your family are ok with who you turned out to be.


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## Aaryn Skychaser (Aug 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Depends. Do you have pushy parents and family who are constantly badgering you to get a girlfriend and get married like the perfect little person you are? If so, that would obviously start making you want to tell them where you stand. It's also nice to talk to those you trust about how you are just for the comfort knowing that your family are ok with who you turned out to be.



I agree. If you carry on the charade for too long, it'll be even a bigger issue once you finally let the cat out of the bag.


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## XERO (Aug 30, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> You've never been pushed by family *constantly* by family to have children/grand children?  If that's so, you won't understand.



I remember this, and sometimes still hear it as I haven't "come out" to them yet. 
I got around the "Why aren't you going to have children?" portion of this by saying I'm devoting my life to the research of Artificial Intelligence.
Though as was said earlier, it will probably cause me problems later down the road from keeping the charade up too long.


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## An Sionnach Rua (Aug 30, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Depends. Do you have pushy parents and family who are constantly badgering you to get a girlfriend and get married like the perfect little person you are? If so, that would obviously start making you want to tell them where you stand. It's also nice to talk to those you trust about how you are just for the comfort knowing that your family are ok with who you turned out to be.


I hadn't considered that, because my parents aren't like that at all.


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## WolvesSoulZ (Aug 30, 2009)

I haven't came out to anyone, but my rl furfriend (of course, they asked and i told them, but peop in fandom are more open minded, would be awesome if everyone would be like that for that XD)

I will probly tell my mom when il have a boyfriend, if i have a girlfriend, still no point to come out, and friend later. 
Actualy i will probly wait after highschool, so when il be 17.
I think my mom will take it well, i have no idea for friend.
But a thing is sure is that i won't be able to hide it forever, my parent sorta keep pushing on "When i'll have a girlfriend" or kid.. It's annoying sometime, even if i don't want kid really.

Also, i'm bi.


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## An Sionnach Rua (Aug 30, 2009)

I'd say most people who could be described as furries are more open-minded about certain aspects of _sexuality_. As for other things...


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## Kryn (Aug 31, 2009)

I told an old friend from highschool I was bi the other day. That brings the count up to 3 people I've told.

It wasn't that hard to tell him, I remember back when I was in school somebody told me he was bi as well but I never bothered to ask him myself or say anything about it. But I brought it up in conversation since I was very positive he wouldn't respond badly. And he didn't, infact he told me about a few occasions where he made out with a few other guys but he didn't give me any other details than that.

I sorta like him but he's bullshitting with some other girl he knows. He was dating her and even taking care of her child which he isn't the father of. Then she cheated on him and now that that's over she wants him back. I need to convince him she's not worth it.

Sorry for the blogish post, felt like writing this somewhere.


----------



## Benn (Sep 2, 2009)

Mk, so the count is around... 104-ish... counting private reps. Most of my family doesnt know... they'll see it as something to "fix". It will probably go down something like... mom crinkles her face, gets frowny, dissapointment, then "ok, i still love you..." dad will sit there silently, upset, and dissapointed even more... (the other 2 sons he's had are super-straight, but are mean with girls). Even if they don't kick me out, they'll feel as though im not the same person, which will suck for me, because I'll feel rejected, 
But I may dodge the whole thing... looking into residence at my University. Hoping I can pay of $16000 a year...  If not, ive got a friend's basement i can move into for a while.

Nothing is wrong with blogging, people can always skip through the bulk so they can start talking.


----------



## Seizure Puppy (Sep 6, 2009)

Why is there a topic for people admitting their gay, but not one for people comfortable with the fact they are straight? In an attempt to be open and accepting you have shut out a rather large group of people who may feel just as confused and unwelcome in the world as you do.

I of course have no preference, since I am a perfect being and thus find such connections meaningless.


----------



## Ibuuyk (Sep 6, 2009)

Seizure Puppy said:


> Why is there a topic for people admitting their gay, but not one for people comfortable with the fact they are straight? In an attempt to be open and accepting you have shut out a rather large group of people who may feel just as confused and unwelcome in the world as you do.
> 
> I of course have no preference, since I am a perfect being and thus find such connections meaningless.



Wow, you sound like an arrogant version of myself


----------



## Kryn (Sep 6, 2009)

Seizure Puppy said:


> Why is there a topic for people admitting their gay, but not one for people comfortable with the fact they are straight? In an attempt to be open and accepting you have shut out a rather large group of people who may feel just as confused and unwelcome in the world as you do.
> 
> I of course have no preference, since I am a perfect being and thus find such connections meaningless.



Words cannot describe the epic fail in this post.

No seriously, please tell me where in the world anyone gets put down cause they are essentially the most common type of person that's ever existed. Maybe smack in the middle of the gay district in San Francisco but most straight people wouldn't want to be there anyway.


----------



## ChrisPanda (Sep 6, 2009)

Seizure Puppy said:


> Why is there a topic for people admitting their gay, but not one for people comfortable with the fact they are straight? In an attempt to be open and accepting you have shut out a rather large group of people who may feel just as confused and unwelcome in the world as you do.
> 
> I of course have no preference, since I am a perfect being and thus find such connections meaningless.


 
Wait have you read my posts in this thread.

I'm straight. You can say it to.


----------



## Seizure Puppy (Sep 6, 2009)

Kryn said:


> Words cannot describe the epic fail in this post.
> 
> No seriously, please tell me where in the world anyone gets put down cause they are essentially the most common type of person that's ever existed. Maybe smack in the middle of the gay district in San Francisco but most straight people wouldn't want to be there anyway.



Perhaps right here on this forum. As you can see, I've already been criticized and mocked for even presenting the idea, so clearly it is not as far-fetched as you might have thought. I was merely hoping to allow a more open and free-thinking place, but clearly such ideas frighten you so I shall allow you your narrow view.


----------



## SnowFox (Sep 6, 2009)

You guys are probably too new to understand the awesome that is Seizure Puppy.


----------



## Hir (Sep 6, 2009)

I've only just realised his post form


----------



## Aden (Sep 6, 2009)

Seizure Puppy said:


> Perhaps right here on this forum. As you can see, I've already been criticized and mocked for even presenting the idea, so clearly it is not as far-fetched as you might have thought. I was merely hoping to allow a more open and free-thinking place, but clearly such ideas frighten you so I shall allow you your narrow view.



Gay coming out thread: "Yeah I came out and my parents almost kicked me out of the house and my mom was crying and I lost about half of my friends but some of them were cool about it. I'm still afraid to hold hands with my SO in public for fear of being a target for hate crimes or something."

Straight experiences thread: "Yeah so one time I asked this chick out and she said no. Sucked."


----------



## Klay (Sep 7, 2009)

Oh, god the hardest thing I've ever done would have to be coming out to my mom about being an atheist. She told me that she thought she was a failure as a parent and when I left the room I think she probably started to cry. >.< I can't even imagine how hard it would be to tell her that I'm bisexual. (although with straight preferences) I know she wouldn't take it bad or anything, but still.


----------



## Koray (Sep 7, 2009)

Klay said:


> Oh, god the hardest thing I've ever done would have to be coming out to my mom about being an atheist. She told me that she thought she was a failure as a parent and when I left the room I think she probably started to cry. >.< I can't even imagine how hard it would be to tell her that I'm bisexual. (although with straight preferences) I know she wouldn't take it bad or anything, but still.



I find every single young person being an atheist, including myself.
Why would she think she was a failure as a mother? Being an atheist is nothing these days-so is being gay or bi. People take their own decisions, and noone should think they are a failure because someone is making his life the way he wants to =[


----------



## Klay (Sep 7, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> I find every single young person being an atheist, including myself.
> Why would she think she was a failure as a mother?=[



I dunno.

Probably because she made us go to church and sunday school for like 5 years. And that my brother also turned atheist. She told me I was just copying him. I get that alot. :sad: _really_ annoying. I'm not really, knowing that he was an atheist just made me think about it more.

Oh, and I don't know were the hell you live, but around here I know of only 2 atheists. Me and my brother. Although he moved out and is starting collage this year so I guess its 1.


----------



## Kryn (Sep 7, 2009)

Seizure Puppy said:


> Perhaps right here on this forum. As you can see, I've already been criticized and mocked for even presenting the idea, so clearly it is not as far-fetched as you might have thought. I was merely hoping to allow a more open and free-thinking place, but clearly such ideas frighten you so I shall allow you your narrow view.



Oh, I see what you did thar.

No seriously, I thought you were just being some simple troll but I understand now.


----------



## Takun (Sep 7, 2009)

Kryn said:


> Oh, I see what you did thar.
> 
> No seriously, I thought you were just being some simple troll but I understand now.



No this is a complex troll.


----------



## Aden (Sep 7, 2009)

I like how he says "Why is there a topic for people admitting their gay, but not one for people comfortable with the fact they are straight?" and goes on and on about it, but then doesn't actually make any effort to make the thread. WE MUST BE PERSECUTING HIM WITH GAY PSYCHIC ENERGY GUISE


----------



## Jashwa (Sep 7, 2009)

Aden said:


> I like how he says "Why is there a topic for people admitting their gay, but not one for people comfortable with the fact they are straight?" and goes on and on about it, but then doesn't actually make any effort to make the thread. WE MUST BE PERSECUTING HIM WITH GAY PSYCHIC ENERGY GUISE


GAY/BI MIND BLOCK!  

FUCK, NOT ENOUGH MANA!


----------



## Benn (Sep 7, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> GAY/BI MIND BLOCK!
> 
> FUCK, NOT ENOUGH MANA!


 
You're leaving out valid sub-minorities! Bastard!

It's LESBIAN/GAY/BI/TRANSEXUAL/TWO SPIRITED/ALLIANCE MIND BLOCK
:grin:


----------



## Revy (Sep 8, 2009)

well my family finally found out thru one of my youtube vids i made lmao, well rather my aunt an my uncle did cause GOOGLE TOOLBAR SAVES SITES THAT U WENT TOO lol.

didnt get disowned and they are rather acceptive, tho I dont know what to expect from now on :[


----------



## Jashwa (Sep 8, 2009)

Revy said:


> well my family finally found out thru one of my youtube vids i made lmao, well rather my aunt an my uncle did cause GOOGLE TOOLBAR SAVES SITES THAT U WENT TOO lol.
> 
> didnt get disowned and they are rather acceptive, tho I dont know what to expect from now on :[


You're lucky they went to that and not your porn.


----------



## furry fan (Sep 8, 2009)

i want to come out to my mom i think she'd understand but my step dads a total nazi and would probaly drag me out behind the shed and blow my head off


----------



## Jashwa (Sep 8, 2009)

furry fan said:


> i want to come out to my mom i think she'd understand but my step dads a total nazi and would probaly drag me out behind the shed and blow my head off


Tell him.  Tell him.  Tell him.


----------



## furry fan (Sep 8, 2009)

no way that guy is pyscho he makes the kkk look like greenpeace


----------



## 8-bit (Sep 8, 2009)

Klay said:


> Oh, god the hardest thing I've ever done would have to be coming out to my mom about being an atheist. She told me that she thought she was a failure as a parent and when I left the room I think she probably started to cry. >.< I can't even imagine how hard it would be to tell her that I'm bisexual. (although with straight preferences) I know she wouldn't take it bad or anything, but still.




Her head would melt like at the end of _Raider of the Lost Ark_.


----------



## Jashwa (Sep 8, 2009)

furry fan said:


> no way that guy is pyscho he makes the kkk look like greenpeace


Experiment in social science, go go go.


----------



## FanaticRat (Sep 8, 2009)

Yeah, so now that I've finally gotten to college I found the whole "come out when you get there" thing...ain't really gonna work. I really thought I'd be able to do it, but it turns out my roommate is a super religious guy, and I don't want the relationship to go sour. Even worse, I came out to one of my good friends from highschool and now I'm down a friend (and then my mother called me up later and figured out I was upset then bitched at me calling me immature and stuff because I didn't want to tell her about it :/).

The good news is there's a pretty cool gay organization here where I hang out sometimes. What's more, a girl I was friends with who was a year ahead of me is one of the managers of the organization (we were both befuddled when we saw each other at the gay callout).

Oh, and I have a crush on a guy down the hall and know whatever I do or don't do it'll end badly. Oh well.


----------



## 8-bit (Sep 8, 2009)

FanaticRat said:


> Yeah, so now that I've finally gotten to college I found the whole "come out when you get there" thing...ain't really gonna work. I really thought I'd be able to do it, but it turns out my roommate is a super religious guy, and I don't want the relationship to go sour. Even worse, I came out to one of my good friends from highschool and now I'm down a friend (and then my mother called me up later and figured out I was upset then bitched at me calling me immature and stuff because I didn't want to tell her about it :/).
> 
> The good news is there's a pretty cool gay organization here where I hang out sometimes. What's more, a girl I was friends with who was a year ahead of me is one of the managers of the organization (we were both befuddled when we saw each other at the gay callout).
> 
> Oh, and I have a crush on a guy down the hall and know whatever I do or don't do it'll end badly. Oh well.



Dude, that sucks zombie cock. (which is highest level of sucking)

You're sad.  I recommend a healthy dose of MEIN HERZ BRENNT!  Always cheers me up.


----------



## furry fan (Sep 8, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Experiment in social science, go go go.


do u want me to die seriously what did i ever do to u


----------



## Jashwa (Sep 8, 2009)

I'm slowly hinting to my new friends that I'm bi.  I don't know if they'll catch on and say something or not, though.  If they don't catch on, I won't outwardly say it.



furry fan said:


> do u want me to die seriously what did i ever do to u


Possibly.  

Nothing, but what have you ever done _for_ me?  Huh?  Huh?  Didn't think so!


----------



## furry fan (Sep 8, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I'm slowly hinting to my new friends that I'm bi.  I don't know if they'll catch on and say something or not, though.  If they don't catch on, I won't outwardly say it.
> 
> 
> Possibly.
> ...


*gives 20 bucks* there now stop trying to convince me commit suicide


----------



## Klay (Sep 8, 2009)

8-bit said:


> Her head would melt like at the end of _Raider of the Lost Ark_.



lmao.

In that case I think I'll just let think I'm straight as of now.

Now that I think about it, she _might _possibly know. I corrected her when she saw a gay guy on tv wearing ugly clothing and said "I thought all gay guys were supposed to be fashionable, whats this guys problem?" Or at least...something like that, it was a while ago. :/ Well, anyways I told her that not all gay people have to wear nice clothing. I correct her about crap like that alot.

Also, my favorite color is purple and I wear a purple sweatshirt everywhere. Well, that would only point to gayness to her if she believes in the stereotypes or that purple is a girly color.


----------



## 8-bit (Sep 8, 2009)

Klay said:


> lmao.
> 
> In that case I think I'll just let think I'm straight as of now.
> 
> ...




LOLs. Yeh, im bi, so i get that feeling. My mom's totaly lax, but my stepdad isn't. Don't give a shit what he think, though. >u<


----------



## Klay (Sep 8, 2009)

8-bit said:


> LOLs. Yeh, im bi, so i get that feeling. My mom's totaly lax, but my stepdad isn't. Don't give a shit what he think, though. >u<



My mom would be ok with it. Most likely suprised, but ok. I'm sure the rest of my family would be fine with it. I have a gay cousin. My mom's ok with him. But I've heard some horror stories when its your own kid you don't want to really believe it.  My dad is...I don't know, we're not really close. >.< The most we ever do is go fishing together. I pretty sure he'd be ok with it, but I don't really know where he stands on that sort of thing. I've never heard him talk about gay people before. I also have 2 siblings. I'm sure my brother would be down with it, I just saw him vote pro gay on like 5 gay-related polls on facebook. I also have a sister, but I've never heard her talk about gay people at all either.


----------



## Revy (Sep 9, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> You're lucky they went to that and not your porn.


 indeed.


----------



## aussiefox (Sep 10, 2009)

when word got out that i was furry the people that knew what the hell it was all turned on me. stuff got bad after that i got bashed by a pickup truck load of guys and i run over once. but before i moved alot of people acceted who i was


----------



## Benn (Sep 10, 2009)

hmm, sitting in a crowded university lounge with FAF open... a wise decision? oh well.   I got called out on the gay thing yesterday after playing "diversity bingo", where someone else asks you if you're: heterosexual, homosexual, jewidh, christian, over 30, under 20... and i get asked ifim straight... well, no, i say.   So about five or six people turn around to stare at me...
Not sure if that was the best decision of my life....


----------



## furry fan (Sep 10, 2009)

i came out to my mom last night when my step dad wasnt home she was fine with it *barks happily and wags tail*


----------



## Ibuuyk (Sep 10, 2009)

furry fan said:


> i came out to my mom last night when my step dad wasnt home she was fine with it *barks happily and wags tail*



Gratz, dude! *hugs*

I think my uncle's starting to suspect something oO
And my grandma started lookin at me weirdly since I adopted a new habit, smiling & laughing >.>


----------



## Revy (Sep 10, 2009)

When they start suspecting its really only a matter of time till u fuck up and they'll say yea hes gay.


----------



## Mr Ringtail (Sep 10, 2009)

I think people just assume I'm gay anyways. If I want to shock them, I'll tell them I have a girlfriend.


----------



## Benn (Sep 10, 2009)

furry fan said:


> i came out to my mom last night when my step dad wasnt home she was fine with it *barks happily and wags tail*


 
Yay! good for you, im too much a of a pussy to get it out in the open with my parents.   Though its always nice to hear when other poeple see themselves through it without too much ruccus,
*thumbs up*


----------



## FanaticRat (Sep 10, 2009)

furry fan said:


> i came out to my mom last night when my step dad wasnt home she was fine with it *barks happily and wags tail*



Congrats, man. I wish I had as much balls as you do.


----------



## Klay (Sep 10, 2009)

*slightly annoyed/freaked out*

So I ordered a new sweatshirt over the internet. My mom calls me down and is like, "You have a package." So I start to cut open the box and my mom is standing *right there*. Like, next to me. Wanting to unbox it myself cuz I paid 80 dollars for that sweatshirt, I start taking the package up to my room. My mom then says "Can I see whats in there?" So, she made me unbox it right in front of her...ruining the expeirence for me. And it left me wondering if she thought I bought a freaking dildo or something like that...

Also,



furry fan said:


> i came out to my mom last night when my step dad wasnt home she was fine with it *barks happily and wags tail*



I think it would be appropriate if I said, "Congratulations." to you.


----------



## Benn (Sep 10, 2009)

Klay said:


> *slightly annoyed/freaked out*
> 
> So I ordered a new sweatshirt over the internet. My mom calls me down and is like, "You have a package." So I start to cut open the box and my mom is standing *right there*. Like, next to me. Wanting to unbox it myself cuz I paid 80 dollars for that sweatshirt, I start taking the package up to my room. My mom then says "Can I see whats in there?" So, she made me unbox it right in front of her...ruining the expeirence for me. And it left me wondering if she thought I bought a freaking dildo or something like that...


 
Hmm, well, that would be a good ice breaker...


----------



## Loken (Sep 11, 2009)

Benn said:


> hmm, sitting in a crowded university lounge with FAF open... a wise decision? oh well.   I got called out on the gay thing yesterday after playing &quot;diversity bingo&quot;, where someone else asks you if you're: heterosexual, homosexual, jewidh, christian, over 30, under 20... and i get asked ifim straight... well, no, i say.   So about five or six people turn around to stare at me...
> Not sure if that was the best decision of my life....


Omg I forgot all about diversity bingo!  When I did that in orientation last year I was quite in denial about the gayness though so I didn't quite get into that situation.  In any case there are plenty of gays in the school and as for other people they are mostly tolerant so don't sweat it.


----------



## Bandy (Sep 11, 2009)

Klay said:


> *slightly annoyed/freaked out*
> 
> So I ordered a new sweatshirt over the internet. My mom calls me down and is like, "You have a package." So I start to cut open the box and my mom is standing *right there*. Like, next to me. Wanting to unbox it myself cuz I paid 80 dollars for that sweatshirt, I start taking the package up to my room. My mom then says "Can I see whats in there?" So, she made me unbox it right in front of her...ruining the expeirence for me. And it left me wondering if she thought I bought a freaking dildo or something like that...
> 
> ...


*Maybe she was just curious. My mom is so nosy. She is just curious about everything. ><*


----------



## Klay (Sep 11, 2009)

Well, it doesnt seem as bad how I made it.  There was like another minute of conversation I didnt put in, because it would have made the post to long.  Like her saying "Are you sure thats the sweatshirt you ordered and not something else?" Crap like that. Im 75 percent certain she thought I ordered something else besides clothes.


----------



## Benn (Sep 11, 2009)

Loken said:


> Omg I forgot all about diversity bingo! When I did that in orientation last year I was quite in denial about the gayness though so I didn't quite get into that situation. In any case there are plenty of gays in the school and as for other people they are mostly tolerant so don't sweat it.


 probably made the biggest mistake ever, lol.   I got invited to a "group discussion" with the crusade for christ people... err... should have said i was busy... i think ill just hide in the arts loungs


----------



## Dementiality (Sep 11, 2009)

Nothing Irks me more than strangers thinking they know best for what you should be doing with _YOUR_ life.  Their audacity is stupefying.


----------



## LizardKing (Sep 12, 2009)

Yeah!


----------



## Koray (Sep 12, 2009)

LizardKing said:


> Yeah!


Nah!


----------



## Klay (Sep 12, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> Nah!



O RLY?


----------



## Lasair (Sep 12, 2009)

> O RLY?



View attachment 8529


----------



## Benn (Sep 12, 2009)

Wow, i post here allot, oh well.
I think im about to be forced into the open... i was walkin' by the kitchen table, and I see my mom has checked out a book from the Library called "Love, Ellen", which is written by Ellen Degenres mother, after Ellen came out to her... she also rented "the emotional teenager", and "the teen survival guide: sex, drugs, and depression"
And i look at it and think "ohhhh..... k....".   So, not enjoying where this will go... it means she wont be kicking me out, but it also means she'll be making it into a long and uneccesary conversation, which i dont want to have... (i love my parents like family, but as people i'd bump into on the street, I wouldn't want to associate myself with them)...
so "errp!" is my current mindset...


----------



## Lasair (Sep 12, 2009)

My sister had her first kid recently, so now mom's a grandmother.
She keeps going on about how she'd love to live to see my children too.

I couldnt tell her im bi at the moment, even though i kind of want to get it in the open.
If she thought i might not give her more grand-kids in the future, it would probably make me very unpopular to say the least right now.
parents...*facepaw*


----------



## Klay (Sep 12, 2009)

Benn said:


> she'll be making it into a long and uneccesary conversation, which i dont want to have...



Hopefully it's not to awkward of a conversation...I've had my fair share of them with my parents.


----------



## Benn (Sep 12, 2009)

Klay said:


> Hopefully it's not to awkward of a conversation...I've had my fair share of them with my parents.


 
When i was making a stick figure skeleton, on which i would later build my fursona's body, she was convinced it was dirty, because the stick was reclined on a bed, but it was holding an MP3 mind you, and looking out the window... Shes kinda crazy... even when i post pictures on facebook of me, she checks them from her profile to make sure im never looking too "come hither", wich can be as little as looking at the camera seriously, or without a smile on my face...


----------



## Klay (Sep 12, 2009)

It seems my mom isn't as bad as yours.
(your mom = crazy)
Me and my brother both agree that our mom is nosy as hell. She made me add her as a friend on facebook and told me that if I unfriended her there would be consequences. I already explained the whole sweatshirt deal...And now that I'm talking about that, I'm surprised she didn't just open that package herself :/ Right now I'm not really on the best terms with her. She's still kinda mad at me for a few things I've done in the last few weeks. *facepalms* Now I understand why my brother would just lock himself in his room all day when he still lived here. Sadly, I've kinda inherited that nosiness from her, but I'm working on it and have improved a great deal in the last year or so.


----------



## Loken (Sep 12, 2009)

Benn said:


> Wow, i post here allot, oh well.
> I think im about to be forced into the open... i was walkin' by the kitchen table, and I see my mom has checked out a book from the Library called "Love, Ellen", which is written by Ellen Degenres mother, after Ellen came out to her... she also rented "the emotional teenager", and "the teen survival guide: sex, drugs, and depression"
> And i look at it and think "ohhhh..... k....".   So, not enjoying where this will go... it means she wont be kicking me out, but it also means she'll be making it into a long and uneccesary conversation, which i dont want to have... (i love my parents like family, but as people i'd bump into on the street, I wouldn't want to associate myself with them)...
> so "errp!" is my current mindset...


I won't lie an awkward conversation is probably inevitable.  From personal experience though, it is awkward sure but afterward everything is mind bogglingly normal.  There is always an chance that those books were intended to aid in a younger sibling (if you have one) or a troubled cousine.


----------



## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Wow.

I just had a _really_ awkward conversation with my mom. 
mom: Good morning.
Me: It's not morning.
Mom: Why are you always so rude to me?
Me:...(gets out kettle to make macaroni)
Mom:Why?
Me:...
Mom:What did I ever do to you?
Me:...
Mom:Huh?
Me:...
Mom:What did I do?
Me: I don't know...
Mom: Do you want to eat lunch at all this week? If you do I'd give me an answer.
Me: I don't know.
Mom:You have 5 minutes to think of something good.
Me:...(dumps in macaroni)
Mom: Later this afternoon I want you to come downstaris and tell me why you hate me so much.
Me:...
Mom: And I want you to tell me whats bothering you too.
And there was a bunch of other things she said that I'm not going to put in, because then the post would be to long.
Then I waited for my food to be done and went upstairs to eat it. Thanks alot mom, now I feel depressed as fuck. I know she's going to try to make me talk to her and I don't have the heart to tell her that she just annoys me or the spine to tell her I'm bisexual and the rest of my god damn problems.
She's so mad at me right now and I don't have a clue as to what I should do about it.
What do you people think I should do?


----------



## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> Wow.
> 
> I just had a _really_ awkward conversation with my mom.
> mom: Good morning.
> ...


 
Personaly I would think of some excuss of why you were "rude".
I've used "pressure" before as one.
Also fake an appology while you excuse yourself.


----------



## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

chrispenguin said:


> Personaly I would think of some excuss of why you were "rude".
> I've used "pressure" before as one.
> Also fake an appology while you excuse yourself.



I don't know if she'll buy just any excuse.

I've been kind of cold towards her for a while now. >.<


----------



## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> I don't know if she'll buy just any excuse.
> 
> I've been kind of cold towards her for a while now. >.<


 
If your old enough perhaps it's time to move out.
If not, I know this sounds stupid, but a hug works and I supose talking out why you've been cold towards her.


----------



## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

chrispenguin said:


> If your old enough perhaps it's time to move out.



I'm definitely not old enough to move out.



chrispenguin said:


> If not, I know this sounds stupid, but a hug works and I supose talking out why you've been cold towards her.



I not going to talk about why I've been in such a bad mood lately. I'm definitely NOT ready to do anything of the sort.

I'm only going to tell her what my problem is if there is absolutely no other choice.


----------



## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> I not going to talk about why I've been in such a bad mood lately. I'm definitely NOT ready to do anything of the sort.
> 
> I'm only going to tell her what my problem is if there is absolutely no other choice.


 
Well if your mum is insecure about here self that it sounds like she is,
She will asume that its here fault, you hate her and so on.
She probably needs all the nicness you can give her.


----------



## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

chrispenguin said:


> Well if your mum is insecure about here self that it sounds like she is,
> She will asume that its here fault, you hate her and so on.
> She probably needs all the nicness you can give her.



If I didn't feel so sad right now I probably could think of something to say and be nice to her, but I'm not in the mood to do anything of the sort.


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## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> If I didn't feel so sad right now I probably could think of something to say and be nice to her, but I'm not in the mood to do anything of the sort.


 
From personal experiance the longer you leave it the worse it gets.
But if there is something in your life that is making you that sad that needs seeing to first.


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

What's making me sad is her badgering me over my problems. I wish she would just leave me alone about it; If I wanted to tell her what was wrong I would have already.

Like the whole summer she kept asking me if I was depressed, because I was sleeping a bunch (because its hot out. DUR)and eating less.(to lose some of the weight I gained over the year)


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## Hir (Sep 13, 2009)

Say you're under stress because of school or something and that you're sorry that you're taking it out on everyone around you.


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## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

She will badger you over your problems, especially if she thinks your depressed.
I know someone like your mum, but I got around it, complain about everything.
If she knows whats bothering you she wont worry that your about to kill yourself. Statements like "IT'S TO HOT" things like that help no end.

If your under 16 its not unusual


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## Koray (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> What's making me sad is her badgering me over my problems. I wish she would just leave me alone about it; If I wanted to tell her what was wrong I would have already.
> 
> Like the whole summer she kept asking me if I was depressed, because I was sleeping a bunch (because its hot out. DUH)and eating less.(to lose some of the weight I gained over the year)


Parents are always like that. And believe me, you'll be like that one day, too; you'll be worrying about your children. It's only natural.
You can say you're stressed because of school though. Or tell her about those two things...


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

If I tell her I'm stressed out because of school, I'll have a feeling I'll get a response like,
"Well, you just have to deal with it. That's is what life is going to be like and if you keep taking it out on others you'll never have any 
friends when your older. bla bla bla."

Edit: Now that I think about it, I suppose that would be better then her thinking that I'm bisexual to be cool or that it's just a phase or that I need therapy or some crap like that.


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## Aden (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> Wow.
> 
> I just had a _really_ awkward conversation with my mom.
> mom: Good morning.
> ...



I haven't backread much, but you sound like a fucking dumbass. At least ACKNOWLEDGE your mom so she doesn't think you're some cold, angsty teenager. This passive avoidance shit is so cowardly. "Thanks a lot mom, now I feel depressed as fuck"? YOU DID IT TO YOURSELF.

She ANNOYS you? I feel for you, man, I really do. And that wanting to see what was in a package that you ordered from the internet to be delivered to her house without her knowledge? How could you POSSIBLY put up with that kind of abuse for so long? And it's not like she feeds you or gives you a roof over your head or anything. Good thing you're not telling her about any of your problems, either - otherwise she might try to help and you might feel good about yourself. Can't have that.

Go straighten up your life and quit being an ungrateful asshole.


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## Aurali (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> mom: Good morning.
> Me: It's not morning.



Yeah... I can see why it happened.


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Aden said:


> I haven't backread much, but you sound like a fucking dumbass. At least ACKNOWLEDGE your mom so she doesn't think you're some cold, angsty teenager.



What would you have done? I didn't know what to say to her. Part of it was because I was in shock. She never is that snappy.



Aden said:


> And that wanting to see what was in a package that you ordered from the internet to be delivered to her house without her knowledge?



I told her I ordered that and a few tshirts. I told her what was in it. I paid for it with my own money. I think I have the right to want to open by myself. It's not often I order stuff so opening it is half of the fun of getting it.


Aden said:


> \
> And it's not like she feeds you or gives you a roof over your head or anything.



I never said I didn't appreciate what she did for me. I normally like her, but I have a lot to worry about right now.



Aden said:


> Good thing you're not telling her about any of your problems, either - otherwise she might try to help and you might feel good about yourself.



You don't even know my mother. If I told her any of them she would just make them worse.

I don't think you have the right to tell me off when you don't even know all of the situation.


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## Aden (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> I don't think you have the right to tell me off when you don't even know all of the situation.



Then convey the situation better.


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Aden said:


> Then convey the situation better.



sorry if I'm not talking clearly.

I just can't think right now.

Maybe I'll just take a nap and see if I feel better afterwords.

Edit: Never mind, I can't sleep.


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## Benn (Sep 13, 2009)

@ Klay:
Hmm, not sure which quote to respond to... maybe all the annoyingness from her is you seeing her as negativity in the inevitable conversation.   Maybe you're assuming the worst will come of it, and so you're already responding to it...
I'm just giving this answer out of the similair problem ive got going on, (not trying to steal the spotlight)...
Anywho's, GL with the situation.


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> @ Klay:
> Hmm, not sure which quote to respond to... maybe all the annoyingness from her is you seeing her as negativity in the inevitable conversation.   Maybe you're assuming the worst will come of it, and so you're already responding to it...
> I'm just giving this answer out of the similair problem ive got going on, (not trying to steal the spotlight)...
> Anywho's, GL with the situation.



Thank you.

I'm not trying to take up all the spot light. If you want to talk you can talk.

Whats going on with you?


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## Benn (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> Thank you.
> 
> I'm not trying to take up all the spot light. If you want to talk you can talk.
> 
> Whats going on with you?


 
Well, your situation seemed more immediate, so i felt it would be best... 

I gave a giggle today, when i made this quote on my FB: 
Me and you are like a kitten eating a watermelon... they don't belong together, and no one knows how they got together, but for some reason it works out anyways.

And my mom was convinced it was something dirty i laughed at, so she asks: "are you being bad on the internet" -- like im freaking twelve...
So I says: "no? are you serious?"
She says: "well, i cant see what your laughing at, so it could be anything"
So I says: "here, read this quote i made, that's what i was laughing at"
She says: "are you involved with someone? why'd you write that?!"
So I says: " No, no, i've got no one (sob), i was using "you" in the general sense..."
She stares... then leaves to grocery shop...
I give her the finger as she backs out of the drive way...

So yes, my mom is absolutely crazy...


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## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> Well, your situation seemed more immediate, so i felt it would be best...
> 
> I gave a giggle today, when i made this quote on my FB:
> Me and you are like a kitten eating a watermelon... they don't belong together, and no one knows how they got together, but for some reason it works out anyways.
> ...


 
My mums the oposite, she saw a furry desktop background laughed at me for 5 mins walked off and made a drink.


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> Well, your situation seemed more immediate, so i felt it would be best...



I don't know. I think I'll just tell her that School is stressing me out and if she doesn't believe me, (which I'm 70 percent certain she won't) I'll tell her that I have problems that I'm _really_ not comfortable talking about with her and that I'm sorry I've been so mean to her.

And I think I'll just be quiet now. I don't want to sound like a whiney fag.


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## Aden (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> She stares... then leaves to grocery shop...
> *I give her the finger as she backs out of the drive way*...



Epitome of maturity right thar.



> So yes, my mom is absolutely crazy...



I don't see any evidence there of your mom being "absolutely crazy".


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## Benn (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> And I think I'll just be quiet now. I don't want to sound like a whiney fag.


 
By all means, keep posting, i dont find any of yours whiney... the fag part is a given for most everyone on this post though, so that's unavoidable,


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> the fag part is a given for most everyone on this post though, so that's unavoidable,



Heh...that was a good one.


----------



## Lasair (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> Well, your situation seemed more immediate, so i felt it would be best...
> 
> I gave a giggle today, when i made this quote on my FB:
> Me and you are like a kitten eating a watermelon... they don't belong together, and no one knows how they got together, but for some reason it works out anyways.
> ...



^^this

my mom has internet paranoia! she is absolutely convinced that either A: every site on the 'net is filled with paedos that want to have me for 'teh shmex' (wtf mom?) and B: everytime i spend more than 30min online, i must be doing something 'wrong' on it.

eg, before she left earlyer. i was online here. I got up to go downstairs and grab a coke. But i ran into my mom on the landing.

Mom: Whats this about
Me: Huh?
Mom: i come upstairs and you rush out of your room
Me: uh, i just want to get a coke
Mom: No i dont think so, what are you doing in there that makes you rush out as soon as you hear me coming?
Me: umm, talking to my friends, getting thirsty and wanting a coke...
Mom: If i find theres unmentionable material when i go in there..
Me: Mom seriously, its concidence that i ran out, stop being paranoid that i...
Mom: Dont backtalk me! *walks into my room, sees forum, takes no notice of what forum, thankfully* fine, but if you were doing anything like what i think, or i catch you doing it so help me... *lecture*
Me: *confused look on face*

Course i gave her two-fingers as she went back downstairs out of sheer annoyance (wrong i know), but are all parents really always so overprotective? Im 17 and she thinks im like a 5 year old trying to use the internet.

Its the same on PS3, alawys 'what you doing, who were you playing with? people? no they could be solicting you, you should play with people you know!' *facepaw* its PSN, you cant 'not' play with random people
[/rant]


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## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

An Lasair Rua said:


> ^^this
> 
> my mom has internet paranoia! she is absolutely convinced that either A: every site on the 'net is filled with paedos that want to have me for 'teh shmex' (wtf mom?) and B: everytime i spend more than 30min online, i must be doing something 'wrong' on it.
> 
> ...


 
My mum told me that pedophiles don't love me anymore now i'm 17  and I can do anything I want


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## Benn (Sep 13, 2009)

An Lasair Rua said:


> are all parents really always so overprotective? Im 17 and she thinks im like a 5 year old trying to use the internet.[/rant]


 
Well, some parents probably figure their kids are destined for trouble... just wait till your eighteen, then intentionally post some hardcore porn as your wallpaper .
-->From when my mom critiqued on my stick figure drawing, i figured i'd download some full-on porn, and pretend to be editing it, call her in, and begin the followign conversation:
me: hey, come in here, you should see this.
mom: okay, what is i- oh my god! oh for fu-- *walks away
me: no no nooo, hold o-Hold on... come- co-come here, come on now, turn around... k, see this?
mom:for fuck's sake, what wrong with you??
me: k-remember when you saw that stick figure? Well, i thought this would be good for you to have as a reference... k? see-wait, hold on, where- stop shouting-where are you going? st-yes, i get it- k, stop moving, so, YOU hold onto this, so next time im drawing, you can hold it up for a comparison, mkay?   If it looks like this, you can grab a ladder and climb up my ass, kay?

Though i haven't the desire, or nerve to surf for porn, forget showing it to my mother,


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## Aden (Sep 13, 2009)

This is just one big coordinated trolling spree, right? Right? Please tell me this is not how kids actually think today.


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Aden said:


> This is just one big coordinated trolling spree, right? Right? Please tell me this is not how kids actually think today.



I think some of these posts are to be taken as jokes.


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## Thatch (Sep 13, 2009)

chrispenguin said:


> and I can do anything I want



Try getting alcohol legally or voting :V


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## Aden (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> I think some of these posts are to be taken as jokes.



And the ones that aren't jokes are the saddest of them all.


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## ChrisPanda (Sep 13, 2009)

szopaw said:


> *Try getting alcohol legally* or voting :V


 
done and tried


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## Benn (Sep 13, 2009)

I suddenly feel very misunderstood,  i should clear things up now by saying that the whole porn sketch idea was supposed to be a joke... sometimes my sense of humour is dryer than a triscuit cracker...


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> I suddenly feel very misunderstood,  i should clear things up now by saying that the whole porn sketch idea was supposed to be a joke... sometimes my sense of humour is dryer than a triscuit cracker...



I thought it was really funny.

Anywho, I just had another, OMG! moment.

My mom knocks on my door (I can tell its her from her knock) and I'm like, "oh fuck." She knocks again and I open the door and im thinking, "omg I'm not ready to talk to her! KILL ME!!!" But then she says that I have to go fishing with my dad. THAT'S EVEN WORSE!!! I'm totally not prepared to talk to my mom, let alone my dad! So I drive the atv down to the pond. Thank god. My uncle is there. So then I know that he's not going to talk to me. Or at least not in front of my uncle. So then I fish with them. Then after I while I just go back up to the house and I'm informed that I have to do a bunch of chores in front of my mom. The whole time I was thinking. "Oh god. Oh god! OH GOD! Just finish washing dishes. It's going to be fine. Just keep walking. Finish sweeping the floor. Thankfully I finish and she doesn't talk to me. I think I was on the verge of having a panic attack!*Not fun.  *I'm not sure if I'm in the clear. If she wanted to talk to me, then would have been the best time.


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## Benn (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> Anywho, I just had another, OMG! moment.   I'm not sure if I'm in the clear. If she wanted to talk to me, then would have been the best time.


 
Well, you've succesfully dodged the bullet, at least for now... Props to you,


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> Well, you've succesfully dodged the bullet, at least for now... Props to you,



The problem is I'm not sure my mom has even pulled the trigger yet.


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## Jashwa (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> I thought it was really funny.
> 
> Anywho, I just had another, OMG! moment.
> 
> My mom knocks on my door (I can tell its her from her knock) and I'm like, "oh fuck." She knocks again and I open the door and im thinking, "omg I'm not ready to talk to her! KILL ME!!!" But then she says that I have to go fishing with my dad. THAT'S EVEN WORSE!!! I'm totally not prepared to talk to my mom, let alone my dad! So I drive the atv down to the pond. Thank god. My uncle is there. So then I know that he's not going to talk to me. Or at least not in front of my uncle. So then I fish with them. Then after I while I just go back up to the house and I'm informed that I have to do a bunch of chores in front of my mom. The whole time I was thinking. "Oh god. Oh god! OH GOD! Just finish washing dishes. It's going to be fine. Just keep walking. Finish sweeping the floor. Thankfully I finish and she doesn't talk to me. I think I was on the verge of having a panic attack!*Not fun.  *I'm not sure if I'm in the clear. If she wanted to talk to me, then would have been the best time.


OMG!  What a coincidence!  I didn't tell anyone about my sexuality today either and can also make random posts telling stories that aren't relevant!


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> OMG!  What a coincidence!  I didn't tell anyone about my sexuality today either and can also make random posts telling stories that aren't relevant!



I know right? We have so much in common!

We should hang out.


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## Jashwa (Sep 13, 2009)

Klay said:


> I know right? We have so much in common!
> 
> We should hang out.


Die first, then we'll talk.


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## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Die first, then we'll talk.



lawl.

Don't worry.

The feeling is mutual.


----------



## FanaticRat (Sep 13, 2009)

Aden said:


> This is just one big coordinated trolling spree, right? Right? Please tell me this is not how kids actually think today.



I wouldn't know. I mean, I love my parents and could never hate them, but I somedays I'm  sterotypical angsty-teen and and somedays I feel like "I'm an ungrateful bastard and terrible son; someone should have killed me when I was a child." I'm not gonna say I never did or felt any sort of anger at them or think they never maligned me in anyway, but I try to respect them.

Hehe, sometimes I feel like if I come out, I'll just crush my parents hopes and that I'm a horrible son, y'know what I mean? That's one of the things I think is keeping me in the closet. I can honestly say if my parents disowned me or anything I'd probably kill myself.


...Anyway! Emo bullshit aside, my roommate left for the weekend again, so I don't have to sweat about him finding any of my gay fliers or whatnot I brought back from the queer club (oh, and porn, of course). I have to wonder if I'm ever going to tell him...


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## Benn (Sep 13, 2009)

For those of us with the more negative attitudes towards our parents, there is probably a large backstory to what we write; pre-existing tension and grief between parent and child... 
I have a very long, drawn out, and strenuous relationship with my mother (well, who doesn't, right?), and being too nice (actually serious) to produce the feelings of anger towards her directly, i instead vent most of the negativity on the internet, or to friends...
Am i speaking to an audience with this? Or am i vocalizing to myself? Help me out here,


----------



## Klay (Sep 13, 2009)

Benn said:


> For those of us with the more negative attitudes towards our parents, there is probably a large backstory to what we write; pre-existing tension and grief between parent and child...
> I have a very long, drawn out, and strenuous relationship with my mother (well, who doesn't, right?), and being too nice (actually serious) to produce the feelings of anger towards her directly, i instead vent most of the negativity on the internet, or to friends...
> Am i speaking to an audience with this? Or am i vocalizing to myself? Help me out here,



I seem think I have the same problem.  I respect my parents to much and feel to bad to let out any anger towards them.

This would probably explain why I never really say anything when my mom is talking to me.  If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all, right?


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## Lasair (Sep 14, 2009)

Benn said:


> For those of us with the more negative attitudes towards our parents, there is probably a large backstory to what we write; pre-existing tension and grief between parent and child...
> I have a very long, drawn out, and strenuous relationship with my mother (well, who doesn't, right?), and being too nice (actually serious) to produce the feelings of anger towards her directly, i instead vent most of the negativity on the internet, or to friends...
> Am i speaking to an audience with this? Or am i vocalizing to myself? Help me out here,



No i feel the same way.
My father died when i was 5, so mom had to raise me on her own.
After i got over all the grief at around 8 years old, i found it hard to get along with my mom, she was so scared about me becoming my Brother (who became involed in the 'wrong' crowd if you will) that she got overly protective of me. She would have to 'approve' of my friends before i hung out with them, she would almost search them when they came to the house, and she would constantly call me when im out, complain about the dangers to me in life, lecture me on 'true friendship' etc etc. And always questioning everything i did
Over the last 5-6 years our relationship became very tense and a strain on both of us, i turned to my Brother most of the time for guidance and advice rather than my mom. Now that he's gone to Austrailia, she feels she has to protect me even more for some reason.
Of course, she rasied me on her own for the past 12 years almost, so i cant show direct aggression towards her, i feel too compassionate in that sense, so i vent my flustration mostly to my friends and online.


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## Dementiality (Sep 14, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Die first, then we'll talk.





Klay said:


> lawl.
> 
> Don't worry.
> 
> The feeling is mutual.



Looks like we found the guys who voted necrophile.  *kidding*  Or am I?  *mysterious*


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## Jashwa (Sep 14, 2009)

Dementiality said:


> Looks like we found the guys who voted necrophile.  *kidding*  Or am I?  *mysterious*


I laughed.  Good job :3


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## Klay (Sep 14, 2009)

Dementiality said:


> Looks like we found the guys who voted necrophile.  *kidding*  Or am I?  *mysterious*



Ha!


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## Lasair (Sep 14, 2009)

Dementiality said:


> Looks like we found the guys who voted necrophile.  *kidding*  Or am I?  *mysterious*



ouch, nice one lol >:3


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## Kryn (Sep 14, 2009)

Benn said:


> For those of us with the more negative attitudes towards our parents, there is probably a large backstory to what we write; pre-existing tension and grief between parent and child...
> I have a very long, drawn out, and strenuous relationship with my mother (well, who doesn't, right?), and being too nice (actually serious) to produce the feelings of anger towards her directly, i instead vent most of the negativity on the internet, or to friends...
> Am i speaking to an audience with this? Or am i vocalizing to myself? Help me out here,



I'm in a similar situation as well. My mother has always been far to over protective of me, mainly because my father couldn't give a shit about me or my sister if he tried. I haven't spoken more than a few sentences to my dad in the last few months and I've lived with him my entire life. I was never able to hang out with friends because I would have to inform my mom days in advance of anything or she wouldn't give me a ride, or she would bullshit and give me very unreasonable excuses for why I couldn't leave the house. To top it off she never really taught me much, I could never get any good advice for how to live my life from her except for her telling me to go to school all the time. Any hobbies that I wanted to take up she would usually disapprove of instantly. And she's so repressed with her emotions, she never tells me how she really feels about things or asks me about myself. It feels like both of my parents just ignore me all the time.

I dunno, at this point I don't even _*care*_ what they think of me being gay. They will probably just find out from someone else, my dad will disown me on the spot (I'll just lol at that) my mom will probably be acceptive but won't approve.

I'm feeling really good though, I'll be moving out finally in just a few weeks. With some people who already know about my orientation. Then none of this shit above will even matter.


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## Benn (Sep 14, 2009)

Kryn said:


> I'm feeling really good though, I'll be moving out finally in just a few weeks. With some people who already know about my orientation. Then none of this shit above will even matter.


 I've got a friend who i might be able to move out with, both of us in rez at U, but her mom is on the fence about it... I'm hoping it'll work out though... whether i have the money or not, im leaving; student loans here I come, , I can't hang around at home anymore... even now that class is donw for the day, Im just on my laptop at a friend's "studyin"... i wont be home till my mom and dad are asleep... and thats the way it has to be...{


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## Bloodshot_Eyes (Sep 19, 2009)

Well I told my friends I was bi... they said they already knew, and that they've known since they met me.  Now let's back up, we've known each other for like three years. I wasn't (didn't consider myself) bi 'til mid August of this year...   HOW THE HELL WOULD THEY KNOW I'M BI, IF I DIDN'T KNOW!? WHAT! DO I GIVE OFF SOME SORT OF GAY VIBE OR SOMETHING!? I'm so confuzzled. @.@


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## Benn (Sep 19, 2009)

Kuro Ryuichi said:


> Well I told my friends I was bi... they said they already knew, and that they've known since they met me. Now let's back up, we've known each other for like three years. I wasn't (didn't consider myself) bi 'til mid August of this year... HOW THE HELL WOULD THEY KNOW I'M BI, IF I DIDN'T KNOW!? WHAT! DO I GIVE OFF SOME SORT OF GAY VIBE OR SOMETHING!? I'm so confuzzled. @.@


 Mybe they were trying to be supportive, and were trying to make the point that they never considered it a problem... of course, some people do flame a little...


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## Benn (Sep 19, 2009)

Ohhh... no..... if anyone remembers/read my previous posts, my mom just gave me the "teen help books"... sigh... this is how she handled sex-talk... "here, son, have some books"... though she seems to be keeping the Ellen deGeneres book for herself... poop.


----------



## Trevfox (Sep 19, 2009)

when i came out that i was bi my mom was fine with it but my dad wanted to kick me out of the house unfortunately hes never really gotten used to it and its still awkward seeing him all my friends had figured it out though so it wasnt hard to tell them


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## Gaybriel (Sep 19, 2009)

My and my parents: We don't talk about my homosexuality. We barely talk about me and my boyfriend. His parents barely accept it at all. It's a goddamn WONDER I get to see him at all. Let alone talk to him.


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## Trevfox (Sep 19, 2009)

its ruined my relationship with my dad me and him actually havent really spoken to each other since like 2005 when i see him its basically hi and then just awkward looks at me ive even tried to talk to him about it he just cant stand even talk to me in full conversation


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## furry fan (Sep 19, 2009)

Ibuuyk said:


> Gratz, dude! *hugs*
> 
> I think my uncle's starting to suspect something oO
> And my grandma started lookin at me weirdly since I adopted a new habit, smiling & laughing >.>


come out to them and ill hug you


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## Ibuuyk (Sep 19, 2009)

furry fan said:


> come out to them and ill hug you



You'll hug me anyway


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## Leon (Sep 23, 2009)

I just kind of realized my orientation and i guess im bisexual. i havent told anyone yet.


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## The Walkin Dude (Sep 23, 2009)

...


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## Duality Jack (Sep 23, 2009)

Pansexuality is fun! lol its just a sex drive so high that sometimes even dudes look good to me xD its rare tough.


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## Lasair (Sep 25, 2009)

well today i sorta, accidentally came-out without wanting to.

you can check my FA journal for the details.

Mam didnt take it too well at first. We spent about 20min arguing and shouting, and eventually crying. She blamed herself for my bisexuality, because she raised me by herself.
We didnt speak for a good 3hrs after that.
Thankfully though, she's decided shes (sorta) okay with it, and she'll come to accept it in time i hope.

Do feel a lot better having gotten it off my chest though.


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## Largentum_Wolf (Sep 26, 2009)

at the time when i posted on the previous thread, i had only come out on the internet. recently i ended up telling 2 friends because one of there coworkers(a rather unatractive, inbred, sychologicaly disturbed....) was atracted to me, so i told her about being bi, but liking guys more, mostly just to get her to leave me alone. so of course she told every one else she worked with(i hapen to be cool with every one at that gas station) when they asked me about it, i at first told them it was strictly to get her off my back(truth, kinda) but then later on one of the two friends asked me again(there bf,gf) if i was realy bi, and i admited it to her. she didnt mind, and later when she told her bf, my other friend mentioned, he was cool with it as well. aside from the ocational gay joke, the toppic never got brought up again


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## Superfoxy (Sep 30, 2009)

Well, I think I've got the topper for this whole thread. This is the "coming out" thread, but what type isn't specified. I don't think anyone else in this thread has come out as being this way, but I don't want to search to make sure. 16 long pages. Ugh. Anyways...

Recently I figured out that I'm transgendered. 

I started wondering recently. Not sure exactly when, or what the exact thing was that got me going, and that pisses me the fuck off. But anyways, the more I think about it, the more I feel sure. I'm keeping in mind the possibility that this may just be some weird phase, but I really don't think that it is. Anyways, I changed my profile to reflect it, so I'll write the relevant info in this post. I'm physically a guy, and I'd be transitioning from Male to Female. I won't jump right into it because it's a big thing and I want to really make sure first. And there are other issues, like research, etc. Also, I really want kids, so I'd have to find some sort of facility to store my sperm before my fertility goes to shit, then gets cut off. I'm fine with freezer babies. But I really do want children that are genetically my own, so that is a HUGE concern of mine. 

As for how I got to this, well, I always sorta had these swings towards girliness. Hard to explain, really. But one thing I can describe is sorta wanting to be in a female body from time to time. But that kinda got locked in the mental basement along with the gay thoughts, so it's only recently that I'd been able to make sense of it. It was also hard to figure out because I'm fairly androgynous mentally. I think gender is a lot more flexible than most people think, so that kind of made it harder to figure out. So I'm not really suffering and depressed over it, and I'd probably be fine as a guy, just maybe a little disappointed sometimes. But I think I'd be much happier as a woman. Because I'm not horribly upset and don't have a very anguished case of GID, some people misinterpret that somewhat, and from some of  the stuff I've looked through as far as reading up, Trans girls and guys buy into fairly firm gender roles as much as, if not more, than more gender-normal folks. So, I have the privilege of being misunderstood by both straight AND trans folks. Yay! Great to be me. But I still consider myself a girl mentally, though. So, kinda hard to explain. Bleh. I'm trying here, though. And this is sensitive shit, and hard to put into words, so if anyone tl;dr's in here, I will FLIP THE FUCK OUT, and report their asses.

So, why am I bothering to tell you all this? After all, this is fuckin' FA, and I'm basically opening myself up for shit by admitting this. Well, I'm a tough t-girl with a thick skin, so I think I can handle it. And for a better list, here I go:

1) Because I have nothing to be ashamed of.

2) Because I don't want to hide. Some trans women just try keeping it quiet and avoid letting people know unless they know them well. Fuck that shit. They're cowardly bitches, in my opinion. I can understand if they're transitioning in a less-than tolerant area, but if they're in a major city with a tolerant attitude, and they still want to avoid people knowing, then they're being pansies and disgracing the rest of us by being so pathetically reluctant to be honest with those around them.

3) Because I have a general "FUCK YOU, DON'T FUCKING TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" attitude. If anyone really gives me shit for being trans, I'll be all like, "Fuck you, I'm a chick". Then I'll light them on fire.

4) Because it may help out any other trans people who are on here, and help them get in touch with themselves.

So, umm, there you have it. Not sure what else to add, so I'll just leave it for now. If you have any non-bullshit or questions, I'll be up for it. But I'm fucking tired and it's like 6:35 right now, so as for now, I'll go to bed.


----------



## Gavrill (Sep 30, 2009)

I think I may be transgendered. I'm not sure, but I've never really felt like a girl. I've always been more interested in what the guys were doing. It's weird, I wish I knew for certain...


----------



## Microsoftt (Sep 30, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius:

I suppose being a gay guy and being perfectly fine with being gay, it's by default harder for me to feel sympathy or understanding for a guy who (I assume you like other guys, unless you're one of those funny hetero dudes who say I'M A LESBIAN, they just like what I like!) doesn't just say he's gay. Not to be offensive, so please don't take it the wrong way, I'm just saying this so maybe you can understand why it's hard for me to express the same emotion as you or to comfort you.

Even if you do feel you are a female mentally, I really don't think you should go through with an operation for it and strongly suggest you don't. I had a friend who did, he really turned out... ugh. His facial appearance is still a man, nothing about him is womanly. He's just a guy with no penis. 

There's lots of body modification you can take to try to make yourself get real close to looking like a female, but no matter how much you try to look like one, you will never truly, physically, exactly be one. Only look like it. You won't be able to become pregnant and on the genetic level will still read off as a male. I also take that since your vagina would be totally artificially crafted that your sexual enjoyment would be close to totally shattered. I don't think it's worth it at all. One of my best friends, another who was a transgender male, decided that she'd rather keep her real vagina than have a fake penis and simply live with her girlfriend as a lesbian. Honestly, there's not a smarter decision than that.

Sorry, please don't take offense to this, I'm genuinely trying to give you advice and explain why I don't think that actually ever going through with it is a good idea. Not until science takes about 3,000 steps into the future.


----------



## Superfoxy (Sep 30, 2009)

Well, I can summarise my answer in two words: Fuck Off. You keep claiming you're trying to be helpful and not offensive, but you just can't recognise how rotten this shit sounds. 



Microsoftt said:


> I suppose being a gay guy and being perfectly fine with being gay, it's by default harder for me to feel sympathy or understanding for a guy who (I assume you like other guys, unless you're one of those funny hetero dudes who say I'M A LESBIAN, they just like what I like!) doesn't just say he's gay.



I'm bi. Thanks for the attempt at bisexual erasure, you asshole.



Microsoftt said:


> Not to be offensive, so please don't take it the wrong way, I'm just saying this so maybe you can understand why it's hard for me to express the same emotion as you or to comfort you.



You're a bigot and I hope you die in your sleep. And I'm reporting this post. I don't give a shit if you have trouble empathising. You still could have shut the fuck up.



Microsoftt said:


> Even if you do feel you are a female mentally, I really don't think you should go through with an operation for it and strongly suggest you don't. I had a friend who did, he really turned out... ugh. His facial appearance is still a man, nothing about him is womanly. He's just a guy with no penis.



It's a lot more than just an operation. And I'm not your fucking friend, so my transitioning may be different. You give off a reek of troll, I have to say.




Microsoftt said:


> There's lots of body modification you can take to try to make yourself get real close to looking like a female, but no matter how much you try to look like one, you will never truly, physically, exactly be one. Only look like it. You won't be able to become pregnant and on the genetic level will still read off as a male.



You really think that doesn't bother me? Sure it does. Your point being? It's still more "me" than the body I'd have. 

So why, then, do you fuck men? The point of mating in life forms is usually to induce pregnancy. But no matter how many times you try with guys, you will never get them pregnant, and they will never get you pregnant. So why do you do it, then? 




Microsoftt said:


> I also take that since your vagina would be totally artificially crafted that your sexual enjoyment would be close to totally shattered.



You're talking out your ass on this one. First off, it isn't "totally artificial". They reshape the tissue that is there. And the new vag is made from the dick being scooped out and the skin turned inside out and inserted into the body. So unless it was some lousy surgeon and who botched it horribly, I wouldn't lose all feeling.



Microsoftt said:


> I don't think it's worth it at all.



Well, that's your fucking opinion and I don't give a shit about it.



Microsoftt said:


> One of my best friends, another who was a transgender male, decided that she'd rather keep her real vagina than have a fake penis and simply live with her girlfriend as a lesbian. Honestly, there's not a smarter decision than that.



Okay, now you are ABSOLUTELY trolling. You can't compare the two procedures. The penis is so complex that building one from scratch is near impossible, and beyond current medical science. Now, this is oversimplifying, but a vagina is to some degree a long cavity. In the case of MTF transsexuals, it's made from the hollowed out wang. So it comes a lot closer to an actual vagina than a fake penis made from scratch comes to a real one.



Microsoftt said:


> Sorry, please don't take offense to this,



Sorry? I don't believe you are in the slightest degree, based on what you've said so far. AND YOU'RE FUCKING RIGHT I'M TAKING OFFENSE TO YOUR BIGOTRY, VERBAL ABUSE, AND MISNOMERS!



Microsoftt said:


> I'm genuinely trying to give you advice



No you're fucking not. Couldn't be more obvious.



Microsoftt said:


> and explain why I don't think that actually ever going through with it is a good idea. Not until science takes about 3,000 steps into the future.



*Claps slowly*

Fuck off and die.


----------



## Microsoftt (Sep 30, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius:

I was just trying to give some advice because I actually care about other human beings. The fact you instantly jump the gun just because someone says something... just makes you seem insecure by getting so intensely offended. It's like no one is allowed any kind of different viewpoint, opinion, etc. at all and anyone who thinks differently from a transgender is instantly marked as equivalent to a racist by the transgender community simply because. I mean, is this kind of reaction and attitude supposed to make me respect you any more? It just kind of makes me laugh even more.


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## Jashwa (Sep 30, 2009)

I have to take Microsoftt's side in this. 

He's just trying to give you his opinion on the issue.  Just because it doesn't agree with yours doesn't mean he's trolling you.  He's honestly trying to help.  So please take your persecution complex and shove it.  You're just embarrassing yourself by treating every viewpoint opposite from yours as hostile. 

Plus, people don't make accounts 2 years in the past to come just troll people.


The Superfoxy Genius said:


> So, why am I bothering to tell you all this? After all, this is fuckin' FA, and I'm basically opening myself up for shit by admitting this. Well, I'm a tough t-girl with a thick skin, so I think I can handle it.


I lol'd.  You don't have thick skin, you're flipping out by Microsoftt simply trying to help you.  If you don't really have gender dysphoria and you'd be fine living as a guy, then why take the risk of going through that whole lengthy process on a guess that you might be happier as a chick?  If gender is as flexible as you say it is, what if your gender changed back towards the male spectrum?  Then you just might GET the gender dysphoria and actually BE miserable.

Plus, it's a lot of money and time for "I'd think I'd be happier as a chick" instead of "If I have to live in this male body, I'll kill myself."




			
				Same guy said:
			
		

> "Fuck you, I'm a chick"


TL;DR, this quote.  Anything you say will be met with insults, cursing, and a vehement denial to even recognize that you're just giving your input and trying to help.


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## Aurali (Sep 30, 2009)

Shenzebo said:


> I think I may be transgendered. I'm not sure, but I've never really felt like a girl. I've always been more interested in what the guys were doing. It's weird, I wish I knew for certain...



Take your time Shen. It's a huge decision, and one that doesn't reverse very well. (by that I mean at all.)  Though I've never been happier so


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## Aden (Sep 30, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius said:


> Well, I can summarise my answer in two words: Fuck Off.
> 
> You're a bigot and I hope you die in your sleep.
> 
> ...



woooooowww


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## Superfoxy (Sep 30, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I have to take Microsoftt's side in this.
> 
> He's just trying to give you his opinion on the issue.  Just because it doesn't agree with yours doesn't mean he's trolling you.  He's honestly trying to help.



Well, he wasn't just giving me his opinion on it. He was arguing on the basis of falsehoods. 



Jashwa said:


> So please take your persecution complex and shove it.



Take your worthless defense of assholery and shove it. I don't have a "persecution complex". I just have a natural allergy to bad arguments and misnomers trotted out as truisms.




Jashwa said:


> You're just embarrassing yourself by treating every viewpoint opposite from yours as hostile.



You're just embarassing yourself by lining up with this discriminatory asshole who makes shitty arguments in the guise of 'help'.





Jashwa said:


> Plus, people don't make accounts 2 years in the past to come just troll people.



Trolling is a sport that someone can get into at any time. DDUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!



Jashwa said:


> I lol'd.  You don't have thick skin, you're flipping out by Microsoftt simply trying to help you.



He wasn't trying to "help me". If you really believe that, then you need medication.



Jashwa said:


> If you don't really have gender dysphoria and you'd be fine living as a guy, then why take the risk of going through that whole lengthy process on a guess that you might be happier as a chick?



Well, I really can't explain this to you, since you seem mentally incapable of understanding any subtlety in ideas. Once you've figured out the difference between acceptable and ideal, let me know, and I'll bother helping drill it into your skull.



Jashwa said:


> If gender is as flexible as you say it is, what if your gender changed back towards the male spectrum?



Because I don't really 'flip' like that. That's a useless hypothetical. What if you woke up one day and thought you were a woman in a man's body? The point I'm making is you can pull all kinds of stuff out of your ass, and just because you can doesn't mean you're making a real argument.



Jashwa said:


> Then you just might GET the gender dysphoria and actually BE miserable.



*claps* Yeah, useless hypothetical again.



Jashwa said:


> Plus, it's a lot of money and time for "I'd think I'd be happier as a chick" instead of "If I have to live in this male body, I'll kill myself."



Well, you're missing the difference between acceptable and good again. Let me know when you can understand that.



Jashwa said:


> TL;DR, this quote.  Anything you say will be met with insults, cursing, and a vehement denial to even recognize that you're just giving your input and trying to help.



SI;UB, don't boil down a complex presentation to a simple quote. Congratulations. You just became Fox News. And I will take the piss out of stupid and fatuous arguments wherever I find them. Whether they're under the disguise of 'help' or not.



Shenzebo said:


> I think I may be transgendered. I'm not sure, but I've never really felt like a girl. I've always been more interested in what the guys were doing. It's weird, I wish I knew for certain...



Really? That's neat! Thanks for sharing that with us. And thanks for the support in the form of you sharing that. If you want to talk, send me an IM.



Eli said:


> Take your time Shen. It's a huge decision, and one that doesn't reverse very well. (by that I mean at all.) Though I've never been happier so



WHAT? Really? *jaw drops* Sorry, but I have to ask directly for clarification. You used to be a guy physically? Let me just compliment you by saying that I never thought that. And I'm glad you're happy. :grin:


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## Microsoftt (Sep 30, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius:

If you can't handle trying to explain your side calmly once the second anyone says anything differently, then are you really ready for the operation? Jashwa is right, it's something that needs very serious attention. It's not a true 100% flawless change from male to female. He made a pretty good point with the quote. 

It's like no one's allowed to think differently at all, if anyone disagrees any, they must be a troll. MUST BE. If you're under the impression we're merely only working off of misconceptions, then please inform us of your side calmly, tell us the truth about it. You never considered the possibility we might just be ignorant.

Edit: I think it might be more fitting for us to even make a new thread about this, I think it's a bit derailing to the whole coming out thread for us to be talking here. Or go to PMs. Something.


----------



## Jashwa (Sep 30, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius said:


> Well, he wasn't just giving me his opinion on it. He was arguing on the basis of falsehoods.


He was trying to get you to think about it, that's all.  Just because his opinion conflicts with yours doesn't mean that he was trolling you and trying to just piss you off. 




> Take your worthless defense of assholery and shove it. I don't have a "persecution complex". I just have a natural allergy to bad arguments and misnomers trotted out as truisms.


You obviously do if you think that anyone disagreeing with you is totally against transgendered people and is trolling you. 





> You're just embarassing yourself by lining up with this discriminatory asshole who makes shitty arguments in the guise of 'help'.


That's where you're wrong.  You're the one who's embarrassing him/herself (what do you go by?) by automatically treating a helping hand with hostility.  






> Trolling is a sport that someone can get into at any time. DDUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!


Trolling!=a troll.  A troll is someone who only trolls.  Trolling can be done by anyone. 




> He wasn't trying to "help me". If you really believe that, then you need medication.


Open your eyes.  Seriously.  He was trying to say "Look, maybe you shouldn't rush into this.  It's a big risk and costs a lot of money, and if it's not absolutely necessary, then maybe you should be less gung ho about it."





> Well, I really can't explain this to you, since you seem mentally incapable of understanding any subtlety in ideas. Once you've figured out the difference between acceptable and ideal, let me know, and I'll bother helping drill it into your skull.


Your superiority complex is hilarious, as is your complete lack of reading comprehension.  I wasn't saying that it was the exact same, I was saying, like microsofttt, that you should think about it, since you seem to be making an impulse decision with not very much to back it up. 




> Because I don't really 'flip' like that. That's a useless hypothetical. What if you woke up one day and thought you were a woman in a man's body? The point I'm making is you can pull all kinds of stuff out of your ass, and just because you can doesn't mean you're making a real argument.


I wasn't saying you would for sure, but if you're not hardcore gender dysphoric, then you might miss your male body once you get rid of it if being a woman isn't all you thought it'd be.  

Also, your analogy doesn't work because nothing would be changing about me.  I wouldn't feel like a woman in a man's body because I already know I'm a man's body and I'm not changing that.  You don't seem too sure of yourself.  You seem like you'd just enjoy being a woman, rather than thinking you're stuck in a man's body.  We're trying to steer you towards the path of caution with such a serious procedure when it's not necessary. 




			
				you said:
			
		

> *claps* Yeah, useless hypothetical again.


It's not useless, it's a possible outcome.  Just because it won't for sure happen doesn't mean that it for sure won't happen. 




			
				you said:
			
		

> Well, you're missing the difference between acceptable and good again. Let me know when you can understand that.


You completely disregarded my statement when it fits.  Your statement doesn't even apply to what you quoted from me.  The point I was making is that it's not NECESSARY.  It's like plastic surgery.  People can live with being ugly, but they don't want to.  Real gender dysphoric people cannot live a normal life as the other sex, so they have to transition in order to make it manageable. 




			
				you said:
			
		

> SI;UB, don't boil down a complex presentation to a simple quote. Congratulations. You just became Fox News. And I will take the piss out of stupid and fatuous arguments wherever I find them. Whether they're under the disguise of 'help' or not.


What's SI:UB? 

I didn't boil down your "complex" presentation of stubbornness, pompousness, and immaturity, I merely showed your immaturity.  I didn't say that you were wrong, or your arguments were invalid, just that you're acting like a little kid who didn't get his way.


----------



## Superfoxy (Oct 1, 2009)

Well, I know not to feed trolls. So I don't give a fuck about the comments from the last two people. If anyone wants to share their own experiences, or have real dialogue with me, then fine. But I don't see the point in engaging with those who are immune to argument. I've said all I needed to say, so I'll just let it slide. It's my damn life so I can do what I want.


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## Gavrill (Oct 1, 2009)

Eli said:


> Take your time Shen. It's a huge decision, and one that doesn't reverse very well. (by that I mean at all.)  Though I've never been happier so


I know that...that's why I'm trying to take my time and I'm just being androgynous now. It's easier that way.


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## Jashwa (Oct 1, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius said:


> Well, I know not to feed trolls. So I don't give a fuck about the comments from the last two people. If anyone wants to share their own experiences, or have real dialogue with me, then fine. But I don't see the point in engaging with those who are immune to argument. I've said all I needed to say, so I'll just let it slide. It's my damn life so I can do what I want.


Obviously we're trolling you.  

I wonder if you've ever actually been trolled.


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## Lukar (Oct 1, 2009)

Still gay. -Giggles-


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## Jashwa (Oct 1, 2009)

I might come out to all my friends here at college on National Coming Out Day, that's coming soon, isn't it?


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## Lukar (Oct 1, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I might come out to all my friends here at college on National Coming Out Day, that's coming soon, isn't it?



I don't know when that is, but good luck. ^^


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## Aurali (Oct 1, 2009)

Shenzebo said:


> I know that...that's why I'm trying to take my time and I'm just being androgynous now. It's easier that way.



*laughs* also note that the goal of any TS individual is to be known and accepted BY others as the gender they wish to be... so... if you wanna be a male, be a male.. do not be "a female trying to be a male"


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## Qoph (Oct 2, 2009)

I came out to my parents...

But my school will probably be harder 'cause it's so Christian Conservative.  Today this guy talked about how gays were the enemy of the church because they practiced pagan sex rituals.  Holy fuck I can't wait to get out of here.


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## Takun (Oct 2, 2009)

Qoph said:


> I came out to my parents...
> 
> But my school will probably be harder 'cause it's so Christian Conservative.  Today this guy talked about how gays were the enemy of the church because they practiced pagan sex rituals.  Holy fuck I can't wait to get out of here.



I was like, "This sounds familiar"

Then I was like

"Oh it's Qoph :C"


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## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Oct 2, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius said:


> Well, I know not to feed trolls. So I don't give a fuck about the comments from the last two people. If anyone wants to share their own experiences, or have real dialogue with me, then fine. But I don't see the point in engaging with those who are immune to argument. I've said all I needed to say, so I'll just let it slide. It's my damn life so I can do what I want.


 
I hate gays, especially transgenders blah, yak, blah, God hates fags, yak, blah, derp. Now rage for me. 

On a side note, it's good people are coming out. It must feel good for them. Right on.


----------



## Lukar (Oct 2, 2009)

I plan on telling my mom that I'm gay soon... Fun fun.


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## Jashwa (Oct 2, 2009)

Lukar said:


> I plan on telling my mom that I'm gay soon... Fun fun.


I wonder if she'll deny it like when you lied and said that you were bi.


----------



## Microsoftt (Oct 2, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I wonder if she'll deny it like when you lied and said that you were bi.



My wonderful mom just kind of keeps bringing up once in awhile how I should get a girlfriend, or I'll go to Hell for liking penis. My dad doesn't bring it up much. My brother's pretty open with it, but he also doesn't understand it and makes fun of me for it. No one in my family really understands, so I just keep it to myself, or to friends online. FFFFFFFFFFFF


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## Revy (Oct 2, 2009)

coming out is a trap.


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## Jashwa (Oct 2, 2009)

Microsoftt said:


> My wonderful mom just kind of keeps bringing up once in awhile how I should get a girlfriend, or I'll go to Hell for liking penis. My dad doesn't bring it up much. My brother's pretty open with it, but he also doesn't understand it and makes fun of me for it. No one in my family really understands, so I just keep it to myself, or to friends online. FFFFFFFFFFFF


That sucks =\.  

Is it actual making fun of or just teasing?  I get the teasing from my best friend, but it's all in good fun so it doesn't bother me.


----------



## Superfoxy (Oct 6, 2009)

Oh, and also, next sunday, October 11th, is national coming out day. And since the whole family will be there for thanksgiving and I'll probably have an easier time of it if the whole group is there, then I'll come out as bi to them. It'll soften them up for the big news, heh heh. 

Besides, there's gonna be a cousin there who I'm like 99% sure is gay. He even smells that way. And yes, sometimes you can. I'd be willing to bet on it, if anyone would care to arrange a test. I can also tell how healthy someone is by their scent as well. I have a very good sense of smell.

But anyways, either I'll have an easier time of it because there'll be someone who's known to be gay there in the room, or I'll give him a chance to come out. Anyways, I'm not even worried because I'm not extremely close with my parents. So if it blows up, which I doubt it will, then meh. Don't fucking care.


----------



## solipsis (Oct 6, 2009)

I wouldn't dare tell any of my family that I even have a _hint_ of attraction toward guys. I'd be cast out if I was _lucky_.


----------



## ÃedÃ¡n (Oct 6, 2009)

I don't know what I am.

rawr


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## lupineshadow (Oct 7, 2009)

Qoph said:


> I came out to my parents...
> 
> But my school will probably be harder 'cause it's so Christian Conservative.  Today this guy talked about how gays were the enemy of the church because they practiced pagan sex rituals.  Holy fuck I can't wait to get out of here.



That's half the reason I haven't said anything about being a fur or otherkin or any of that- most of my family, parents excepted, are southern christian conservatives who would burn me at the stake if I was even gay, let alone a fur. 

But soon enough I'll have the bike fixed and and a way out- I'll be saying "fuck it, and fuck you for being so damn judgemental, I am who I am and I am going to live my life."

Anyone else had to do this?


----------



## kjmars63 (Oct 7, 2009)

I'm gay and I could really give a shit less about what other people think. Everyone in my family knows, everyone I work with as well. I'm not a fruity gay like what television and popular culture portrays gay to be. I'm gay and homophobic, how? I'm homophobic of the stereotypical gay guys portrayed on television and so forth. What am I talking about? I'm so fucking high right now. @_@


----------



## Takun (Oct 7, 2009)

lupineshadow said:


> That's half the reason I haven't said anything about being a fur or otherkin or any of that- most of my family, parents excepted, are southern christian conservatives who would burn me at the stake if I was even gay, *let alone a fur*.
> 
> But soon enough I'll have the bike fixed and and a way out- I'll be saying "fuck it, and fuck you for being so damn judgemental, I am who I am and I am going to live my life."
> 
> Anyone else had to do this?



Sexuality is a little bit bigger than a hobby.  =\


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Sexuality is a little bit bigger than a hobby.  =\


But it's not as weird to be gay as it is to be a furry.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Oct 7, 2009)

Well I haven't been on  in forever... My mom has been kind of a bitch, being a fur hater. She spied on me found out everything. She got onto my computer and searched through my gmail inbox on July 23. Life's been hell since... She isn't allowing me to be on any social site on the internet or allowing me to chat. Well of course I sneak around a bit... but only for the sake of my love for my snuggle husky Ian. The worst part is my mom hates Ian and won't let me talk to him so I find small amounts of time when my mom is gone and dedicate it to talking to my sweetheart. My mother is stubborn and it is impossible to convince her of anything so my only hope is graduating at the end of this school year and moving out, but the time it's taking is killing me.


----------



## Klay (Oct 7, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> But it's not as weird to be gay as it is to be a furry.



True Dat.

And to Forestfox,

I don't even get how people can be like that. I mean Seriously, does she really think that making your life harder is going to to anything? What the hell is going through her head?


----------



## Takun (Oct 7, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> But it's not as weird to be gay as it is to be a furry.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


>


It's not.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Oct 7, 2009)

Klay said:


> True Dat.
> 
> And to Forestfox,
> 
> I don't even get how people can be like that. I mean Seriously, does she really think that making your life harder is going to to anything? What the hell is going through her head?



She is rather strange as it is. She's neurotic, controlling, and claims to be worried about my "safety." I'm sick of living like this, but there's nothing I can do about it... and it kills me


----------



## Lucy Bones (Oct 7, 2009)

I have to say it, guys. I'm a faggot. This may come as shocking to a lot of you, I know.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 7, 2009)

Ahkmill said:


> I have to say it, guys. I'm a faggot. This may come as shocking to a lot of you, I know.


Have you decided that you're completely faggot now?


----------



## Lucy Bones (Oct 7, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Have you decided that you're completely faggot now?


Oh, no way. :V


----------



## lupineshadow (Oct 8, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Sexuality is a little bit bigger than a hobby.  =\



Sadly, not to my family. My close-but-not-immediate family hates furs and gays and went so far as to praise when gay lynchings happened. And I can tell, knowing them, that they would have done the same for furs. Of course, coming out as an agnostic and also a batshit-crazy therian would freak them out as well.


----------



## Byrne (Oct 9, 2009)

I was the first person to have been in an openly gay relationship at my school. Like ever... (really open minded place) Teachers hated me and my bf. University was much more fun though :3


----------



## Mr Ringtail (Oct 9, 2009)

People already think I'm gay, so I don't see the point of telling them that I'm slightly less gay than they think I am.


----------



## feilen (Oct 9, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius said:


> Oh, and also, next sunday, October 11th, is national coming out day. And since the whole family will be there for thanksgiving and I'll probably have an easier time of it if the whole group is there, then I'll come out as bi to them. It'll soften them up for the big news, heh heh.
> 
> Besides, there's gonna be a cousin there who I'm like 99% sure is gay. He even smells that way. And yes, sometimes you can. I'd be willing to bet on it, if anyone would care to arrange a test. I can also tell how healthy someone is by their scent as well. I have a very good sense of smell.
> 
> But anyways, either I'll have an easier time of it because there'll be someone who's known to be gay there in the room, or I'll give him a chance to come out. Anyways, I'm not even worried because I'm not extremely close with my parents. So if it blows up, which I doubt it will, then meh. Don't fucking care.



Can you also get moods? I can get moods, but most people, you know, just read expressions @_@


----------



## Mr Ringtail (Oct 9, 2009)

You know, I don't see the point of coming out as bi. Being bi means you can stay in the closet without actually lying to anyone, so savor that shit.


----------



## feilen (Oct 9, 2009)

The Superfoxy Genius said:


> Well, I think I've got the topper for this whole thread. This is the "coming out" thread, but what type isn't specified. I don't think anyone else in this thread has come out as being this way, but I don't want to search to make sure. 16 long pages. Ugh. Anyways...
> 
> Recently I figured out that I'm transgendered.
> 
> ...



Awesome! Non-stereotyped :3

I personally identify as equal parts male and female (although not hermaphrodite) but am just sort of... equally uncomfortable in either gender? If I were female I'd want half to be male. But w/e, best choice is the runner up: Being a femboi :3

There are a large amount of people who identify as both, or as both but leaning towards one... I personally can pick out which of my interests and habits are towards my feminine or masculine sides, and they're often off from what people'd think... There's a distinct feeling to each.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 9, 2009)

Mr Ringtail said:


> You know, I don't see the point of coming out as bi. Being bi means you can stay in the closet without actually lying to anyone, so savor that shit.


Maybe not to your parents, but coming out to social groups has a point.  If no one knows you like the same gender, you probably won't find someone of the same gender.


----------



## Mr Ringtail (Oct 9, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Maybe not to your parents, but coming out to social groups has a point. If no one knows you like the same gender, you probably won't find someone of the same gender.


 
If somebody's gay enough, they can sniff out a closet case. I got hit on my first day of high school by one of these guys.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 10, 2009)

Mr Ringtail said:


> If somebody's gay enough, they can sniff out a closet case. I got hit on my first day of high school by one of these guys.


Just because it could happen by random luck doesn't mean that you'll find someone that you might've been happy with even if you're not open about being bi.


----------



## Mr Ringtail (Oct 10, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Just because it could happen by random luck doesn't mean that you'll find someone that you might've been happy with even if you're not open about being bi.


 
There's nothing random or lucky about it. You ever hear of gaydar? They can read your every mannerism and figure out that you're in the closet, like it's damn near instinctive.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 10, 2009)

Mr Ringtail said:


> There's nothing random or lucky about it. You ever hear of gaydar? They can read your every mannerism and figure out that you're in the closet, like it's damn near instinctive.


I don't even have the words to respond to this.


----------



## Mr Ringtail (Oct 10, 2009)

I'm not saying you shouldn't be open about being bi. Just that it's not that huge a revelation, and the worst you'll probably get is "Oh, you'll grow out of it."


----------



## greg-the-fox (Oct 10, 2009)

Mr Ringtail said:


> There's nothing random or lucky about it. You ever hear of gaydar? They can read your every mannerism and figure out that you're in the closet, like it's damn near instinctive.



Gaydar is such bullshit.


----------



## KaiFox (Oct 10, 2009)

Yea, I've mentioned this in the moods thread.  I came out as bisexual on facebook yesterday, and now most of my friends know about it. And they're all cool with it. It made me so happy to hear them say that they still look at me as the same person and that they think that I'm brave for doing what I did.  I love my friends. ^^ <3


----------



## Lucy Bones (Oct 10, 2009)

And now I come out as full gay~


----------



## Hir (Oct 11, 2009)

Happy national coming out day guys. Anyone come out? No? Oh well.


----------



## Aurali (Oct 11, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Happy national coming out day guys. Anyone come out? No? Oh well.



Guys, I have to come out. I'm a Ratteguhn. Shocking I know. but it's something I have to deal with every day, and I don't think it's worth changing...


----------



## Hir (Oct 11, 2009)

Aurali said:


> Guys, I have to come out. I'm a Ratteguhn. Shocking I know. but it's something I have to deal with every day, and I don't think it's worth changing...


GET OUT OF MY HOUSE D:<


----------



## Klay (Oct 11, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Happy national coming out day guys.



I honestly didn't know.

Geez, I might have at least dropped a hint or something...I'm thinking everyone forgot about it.


----------



## Revy (Oct 11, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> Gaydar is such bullshit.


Actually its pretty useful.


----------



## Griffin (Oct 11, 2009)

ÃedÃ¡n said:


> I don't know what I am.
> 
> rawr



 This is probably a bad idea, espalier for a first post,   I'm 23, Ive known I was gay 13. I have never actually come out as gay, although Ive been kinda outed twice, I've either denied it or mumbled my way though it and hoped no one heard. I haven't ever told my family because there's this whole complicated thing with my farther breaking into our house, abandoning us, becoming a woman, and anyhow i haven't seen him since my 14th birthday, (and then he became a strictly banned topic at home, so ive never talked to anyone about it since, this is the first.)  Ive never really been abstracted to anyone in any significant way, and never anywhere near enough to talk to them about it. (its confusing enough to get thorough life anyway) Ive never come out because I cant see why it should matter, I know it does though, but when I look around society I see so much oppression I just shrug my shoulders and don't want to be part of it.  Well I'm not sure why I started this, Hi all anyway.  TTFN


----------



## Wait Wait (Oct 12, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Happy national coming out day guys. Anyone come out? No? Oh well.



i was thinking about it, though!


----------



## Hir (Oct 12, 2009)

I just came out to the forum I'm most active at about being gay 

Well I was recently banned there for a month so someone else had to post it for me, but it still feels good.

A day late but meh.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 12, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Happy national coming out day guys. Anyone come out? No? Oh well.


I almost did, but I chickened out.  Oh well, there's always another day when the conversation is about something of the sort.


----------



## greg-the-fox (Oct 13, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I almost did, but I chickened out.



same :roll:


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 13, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> same :roll:


Why the roll eyes?


----------



## greg-the-fox (Oct 13, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Why the roll eyes?



Because I'm being stupid, I have no reason not to and I'm in a supportive liberal environment. I'll have to force myself to do it eventually...


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 13, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> Because I'm being stupid, I have no reason not to and I'm in a supportive liberal environment. I'll have to force myself to do it eventually...


Ah, yeah.  The same goes with me.

It's just weird to talk about out loud coming from a backwoods redneck homophobic place before.


----------



## greg-the-fox (Oct 13, 2009)

Also I was thiiis close to telling my roommate, (we were talking about coming out day) the only thing stopping me is well, I think I might like him a bit and I can't let him suspect that *sigh*


----------



## PriestRevan (Oct 13, 2009)

Holy shit, this thread is still here?


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 13, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Holy shit, this thread is still here?


Welcome back.


----------



## PriestRevan (Oct 13, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Welcome back.



Who the hell are you? How do you know me? This conversation never happened.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 13, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Who the hell are you? How do you know me? This conversation never happened.


I'm a no one.  I looked up to you when I was new here.


----------



## kiwi (Oct 14, 2009)

I came out as bi xP but i was kiddin myself xD
everyone knows ima homo noww.. altho my family still think im bi xP
I dont wana haff to come out again! xO lool.

But yeah. my dad ignored me when i came outt. then he moved to spain a lil while after  good riddance aye :3

My mom loves it thooo  hehe


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 15, 2009)

Came out as bi to my best friends today.  It's like, practice.


----------



## Hir (Oct 15, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Came out as bi to my best friends today.  It's like, practice.


Congratulations, I trust it went well?


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 15, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Congratulations, I trust it went well?


Yeah, I knew it would.  It was just hard to admit face to face with someone because I'm so used to the close minded people from my hometown.


----------



## Billy Pup (Oct 15, 2009)

I suggest to everyone that they think it through. For one thing I ask what the point in making I public to everyone is? Is it pride? Are you tired of having to duck behind corners and hide while snuggling your lover? Is it just to get back at your parents or someone else?

When I came out to my parents I did it because I wanted to be an adult and to show them that I can be trustedâ€¦ My mother has not talked to me in three years other than to bitch to me about money and school. My father took it well but him and I never really did have much of a relationship growing up. I will say I have been happy with it. I have been able to find a lovely boyfriend who I have been with for the last two years now and I have made tons of friends that love me for who I am instead of who they thought I was.

So be sure you are willing to sacrifice everything you have for what you may have in the future. 

And as for where you live? I live in a town in Mobile Alabama of about 300 people. Word gets around but in most tight knit communities there is more love then hate


----------



## alicewater (Oct 17, 2009)

Well I did it, I came out to my co-workers as being Bi.


----------



## PriestRevan (Oct 17, 2009)

alicewater said:


> Well I did it, I came out to my co-workers as being Bi.



Wonderful. However, you're a woman. There is a difference between a woman being bi and man being bi.


----------



## greg-the-fox (Oct 17, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Wonderful. However, you're a woman. There is a difference between a woman being bi and man being bi.



Yeah a woman being bi is like saying you're left handed these days, it's so freaking common and nobody cares (unless you're from a really conservative area I guess) But congrats anyway.


----------



## Jashwa (Oct 17, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> Yeah a woman being bi is like saying you're left handed these days, it's so freaking common and nobody cares (unless you're from a really conservative area I guess) But congrats anyway.


It's not that it's so common that no one cares, it's because lesbians are almost completely accepted nowadays where as gays still aren't.


----------



## alicewater (Oct 17, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> It's not that it's so common that no one cares, it's because lesbians are almost completely accepted nowadays where as gays still aren't.


 

Wow! I mean... just wow!  Must be nice to have a penis!
Look I'm not going to fly off the handle here, but going to simply state i your response is rather ignorent. 

If you think lesbians and bi woman are completely accepted you havn't been living in the real world.


----------



## PriestRevan (Oct 18, 2009)

alicewater said:


> Wow! I mean... just wow!  Must be nice to have a penis!
> Look I'm not going to fly off the handle here, but going to simply state i your response is rather ignorent.
> 
> If you think lesbians and bi woman are completely accepted you havn't been living in the real world.



I have, and the fact is, lesbians are more accepted overall than gays are. 

The fact is, *almost* every boy who says, "I hate gays", is not including women in that statement. Lesbians overall have it easier. 

Why? Probably because women seem more emotionally connected anyways then men do in public (you know, "She's my girlfriend [aka, bestfriend]", or hugging in public, etc).


----------



## Hir (Oct 18, 2009)

Came out to one of my best friends about being gay, feels good.


----------



## Wait Wait (Oct 18, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> Because I'm being stupid, I have no reason not to and I'm in a supportive liberal environment. I'll have to force myself to do it eventually...



i know right
like, dang


----------



## Aurali (Oct 18, 2009)

Umm... okay.. since I'm attempting to be honest in life... *points to her gender and runs*


----------



## Draegonis7 (Oct 23, 2009)

So, one of my friends, who was the second person I came out to as being Bisexual, recently decided I am either lieing or that I'm wrong. Its just so upsetting.


----------



## Lucy Bones (Oct 23, 2009)

I almost accidentally came out to my parents. That would have been interesting...


----------



## greg-the-fox (Oct 24, 2009)

Draegonis7 said:


> So, one of my friends, who was the second person I came out to as being Bisexual, recently decided I am either lieing or that I'm wrong. Its just so upsetting.



They'll come around, just give them time. If it's hard to believe, like if you act really straight, it's understandable that they might be in denial about it.


----------



## Ibuuyk (Oct 24, 2009)

Just came out to my mom bout being Gay, feels awesome.


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Oct 24, 2009)

Then you introduced her to your online boyfriend via MSN.

Your mom is pretty awesome Ibuuyk no lie.


----------



## Ibuuyk (Oct 24, 2009)

Thanks, she sure is.


----------



## SnowFox (Oct 24, 2009)

Dear people with understanding parents/family/friends,

I hate you >:[

Love,
Me.


----------



## Lucy Bones (Oct 24, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> Dear people with understanding parents/family/friends,
> 
> I hate you >:[
> 
> ...


I second that.


----------



## Koray (Oct 24, 2009)

Ahkmill said:


> I second that.



Thirded..?


----------



## Ibuuyk (Oct 24, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> Dear people with understanding parents/family/friends,
> 
> I hate you >:[
> 
> ...





Ahkmill said:


> I second that.





DevianFur said:


> Thirded..?



Sorry...


----------



## Koray (Oct 24, 2009)

Ibuuyk said:


> Sorry...



I was kidding, of course! Good for you, Ib :3

*huggles*


----------



## Ibuuyk (Oct 24, 2009)

DevianFur said:


> I was kidding, of course! Good for you, Ib :3
> 
> *huggles*



Thanks, dear *hugs back*


----------



## Kanin (Oct 24, 2009)

I need to come out. It seems so stupid that it's something I have to tell someone so forthwith. I mean, why the fuck does it end up being a talk that's like you're telling someone that a person close to the just died? :I


----------



## Leon (Oct 25, 2009)

Yeah, i need to come out to my parents but I just dont have it in me... that and I dont think my friends would understand seeing how my decision kinda came out of nowhere...


----------



## ChrisPanda (Oct 25, 2009)

Ive come out to my mum and accidently to my ex girlfriend, its going well.


----------



## SnowFox (Oct 25, 2009)

ChrisPanda said:


> Ive come out to my mum and accidently to my ex girlfriend, its going well.



I always thought you were straight :?

Also, I so want to misquote that.


----------



## ChrisPanda (Oct 25, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> I always thought you were straight :?
> 
> Also, I so want to miss quote that.


 
lol go for it, nah i'm definitly bi, but don't parade it too much cause my mates sometimes come on here to find ammo against me.


----------



## SnowFox (Oct 25, 2009)

ChrisPanda said:


> lol go for it, nah i'm definitly bi, but don't parade it too much cause my mates sometimes come on here to find ammo against me.



done. my signature is getting crowded.

If anyone I knew came on here I'd leave forever or get an alt account.


----------



## ChrisPanda (Oct 25, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> If anyone I knew came on here I'd leave forever or get an alt account.


 
well i'm at the point that i'm introduced as a furry to people by my mates.

"hey chris this is *insert name*, *insert name* this is chris he's a furry/furfag." depends on the friend. but I don't mind it so much


----------



## SnowFox (Oct 25, 2009)

ChrisPanda said:


> well i'm at the point that i'm introduced as a furry to people by my mates.
> 
> "hey chris this is *insert name*, *insert name* this is chris he's a furry/furfag." depends on the friend. but I don't mind it so much



I envy you. I could only wish for jokey remarks like that. I would lose friends for being a furry/not straight/black/etc

Not that I'm actually black... just saying.


----------



## ChrisPanda (Oct 25, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> I envy you. I could only wish for jokey remarks like that. I would lose friends for being a furry/not straight/black/etc
> 
> Not that I'm actually black... just saying.


 
damn sounds like you live in stoke on trent. thankfuly I live just outside where people are slightly less racist, homophobic and furry hating.
actually my mates said that they would ditch a friend if he was gay or bi, so i'm not telling them at all. but yeah i am kinda lucky that way.


----------



## Mako (Oct 30, 2009)

I'm still deep within the furry closet. Oh ho ho.  I don't see myself coming out of here unless its to a serious boyfriend or something.  Or some other dude I already know as a furry.

As for this thread in general, it's so sad!  I mean, in a good and bad way.  Coming out sucks, but it's seriously the best thing ever.  To those of you who haven't done it yet, you have a whole life in front of you.  It's better to get it over with earlier than later.

Unless its too early.  I don't get how people came out in high school, that shit's crazy.


----------



## Lemoncholic (Nov 1, 2009)

Lord Kanin said:


> I need to come out. It seems so stupid that it's something I have to tell someone so forthwith. I mean, why the fuck does it end up being a talk that's like you're telling someone that a person close to the just died? :I



It doesn't, I always thought that was a bit silly.

With me after my sister was weeping over the fact she smoked and was being all dramatic with telling my mum about it I simply walked up to both and said "while we're admitting things I'm bi" as if it was nothing. But then again I knew my mum wouldn't care, and my sister's opinion doesn't matter.


----------



## Kryn (Nov 1, 2009)

Lemoncholic said:


> With me after my sister was weeping over the fact she smoked and was being all dramatic with telling my mum about it I simply walked up to both and said "while we're admitting things I'm bi" as if it was nothing.



Lmao, I can't help but laugh at that. But logically, smoking is far more harmful and should be looked down upon more than being bi. A lot of people can't grasp that concept though


----------



## Lukar (Nov 1, 2009)

Telling my ex-girlfriend that I'm gay soon.

This should be fun.


----------



## Dass (Nov 1, 2009)

It's been fraking 5 days, I still have a high enough level of skepticism about it that I don't want the label, and high school, even as gay-friendly as mine is, is a place where people use "gay" to describe a computer that isn't working.

I'm staying inside for a while.


----------



## PriestRevan (Nov 2, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Telling my ex-girlfriend that I'm gay soon.
> 
> This should be fun.



She'll rip out your heart. Good times.



Dass said:


> It's been fraking 5 days, I still have a high enough level of skepticism about it that I don't want the label, and high school, even as gay-friendly as mine is, is a place where people use "gay" to describe a computer that isn't working.
> 
> I'm staying inside for a while.



Are you finally gay now?


----------



## Kyaterina (Nov 2, 2009)

I came out to my family last year. All my friends knew--they'd known for years.

My mom is very, very against homosexuality. With the exception of my Aunt and my recently deceased Uncle David (Rest in peace, I love you.), my whole family is against it.

I told her over the phone, I couldn't bear to do it in person because I was afraid she'd strike out physically at me. She went into hysterics, crying and sobbing and threatening to kill herself.. And since then, she's been very very petty about it.. She's taken me to church to ''have the demons cleansed from me.'' She's taken me to shrinks to ''have my brain fixed.''

And yet, here I still am, very much a lesbian, and happily engaged to the woman of my dreams. My father doesn't know.. He took me to the zoo after I'd come out to the rest of the family, and he saw a gay couple and made some horrible remark about ''those fags over there wearing their sister's pants.'' I didn't say anything to him, and I still regret that.

I'll tell him eventually. But this is a man that has been useless as a father for the past 21 years, and to be honest, probably has missed about a third of my whole life, so I really don't value his opinion very much.

I'm respectful around my less-accepting family members. I don't rub it in their faces, hell, I try not to even talk about Molly around them. I don't do this because I'm ashamed--in fact, I'm very proud of my sexuality. I do it out of respect for the people I love. My mother excepted. I really can't stand that woman. She is the epitome of everything that disgusts me about conservative society. She treats me not as her daughter, but as a cancerous growth on the perfection that was her life.

My younger brother seems to have no opinion. My grandmother--a devout Christian--is acting appropriately in that she loves and respects me just as much as she did before I came out. She even likes Molly. She doesn't like the fact that I am a lesbian, but she knows that it's not her place to judge, and loves me just the same.

Wish I could say the same for mom, but she's a petty, spiteful, angry, horrible woman, and if I'm ashamed of anything, I'm ashamed of the fact that she, of all people, is my mother.


----------



## PriestRevan (Nov 2, 2009)

Kyaterina said:


> I came out to my family last year. All my friends knew--they'd known for years.
> 
> My mom is very, very against homosexuality. With the exception of my Aunt and my recently deceased Uncle David (Rest in peace, I love you.), my whole family is against it.
> 
> ...



You know, to be honest, to be just as... spiteful towards your mother as she is to you doesn't make the situation any better. In fact, it makes you and pretty much anyone else who hates their parents for feeling that way just as bad as the parents who feel that way. 

They can no more control they feel more than a person can control their sexuality. It's silly and dumb to be enraged about it.


----------



## Aden (Nov 2, 2009)

Kyaterina said:


> My grandmother--a devout Christian--is acting appropriately in that she loves and respects me just as much as she did before I came out. She even likes Molly. She doesn't like the fact that I am a lesbian, but she knows that it's not her place to judge, and loves me just the same.



A true Christian? In MY coming out thread?


----------



## Kyaterina (Nov 2, 2009)

@Revan: I'm not upset about the way my mom feels about me. She's entitled to her opinion. It's the way she acts about it that I can't stand. I've told her this to her face multiple times, so it's not as though I'm talking behind her back. She acts like a child about something that I can't change. The fact of the matter is that I'm still her daughter. I'm still the same person I've always been, she just knows something about me now that she doesn't like. The woman has threatened to kill herself if I don't ''stop being gay.'' That's the problem. She's disrespectful and immature toward her own daughter. Her only daughter.

@Aden: Haha, I'm not a Christian.. The majority of my family is though.


----------



## ElizabethAlexandraMary (Nov 2, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Telling my ex-girlfriend that I'm gay soon.
> 
> This should be fun.


 Record the thing and post it here :V


----------



## Aden (Nov 2, 2009)

Kyaterina said:


> @Aden: Haha, I'm not a Christian.. The majority of my family is though.



I was talking about your grandmother, who obviously is more of a Christian than the rest of your family combined.


----------



## Kyaterina (Nov 2, 2009)

Aden said:


> I was talking about your grandmother, who obviously is more of a Christian than the rest of your family combined.



xD Oh, my bad, my bad. The way I read it made it sound like you meant me.. No, she is very, very religious, which I don't mind.. She's a wonderful woman, and she's really the glue that holds our family together.. And it at least SEEMS like she's been able to accept my sexual orientation.. She had trouble at first, but now it's no big deal. I moved from Oregon to New York to live with my fiancee and go to school out here, and she's too busy being proud of me for finally branching out to worry about who I sleep with.


----------



## Kryn (Nov 2, 2009)

Wow, Kyaterina, your mother sounds like a hypocrite and a horrible example of what a christian should be. I see people like that everyday and there's simply no way to deal with their views except to turn them back on them. Remind her about how much Jesus taught his followers to actually _*love*_ one another instead of bickering over each other's sins (I don't believe being gay is a sin as I don't claim any religion myself) since *none* of us are sin free ourselves.

Other than that you're just going to have to give her her own time to accept it.


----------



## Dass (Nov 2, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Are you finally gay now?



Yes, shakily.

Equally shocking; Darth Vader is Luke's father.


----------



## Klay (Nov 2, 2009)

Dass said:


> , and high school, even as gay-friendly as mine is, is a place where people use "gay" to describe a computer that isn't working.
> 
> I'm staying inside for a while.



Uh, I hope you know that almost everyone says gay like that these days. Geez, I'm bi and I say it myself and call people fags all the time. I only know one person who doesn't use gay like that he doesn't even say crap. lol


----------



## Dass (Nov 2, 2009)

Klay said:


> Uh, I hope you know that almost everyone says gay like that these days. Geez, I'm bi and I say it myself and call people fags all the time. I only know one person who doesn't use gay like that he doesn't even say crap. lol



Yes, I know that. I don't so much take offense to the term as I do that it has been 1600 years with the English language and the best insult 90% of people can think of is a male who has an admiration for those lacking vagina.


----------



## Klay (Nov 2, 2009)

Dass said:


> Yes, I know that. I don't so much take offense to the term as I do that it has been 1600 years with the English language and the best insult 90% of people can think of is a male who has an admiration for those lacking vagina.



I don't think it's just the best insult they can think of, it's just like, programmed into their minds to exclaim "gay!" when something/somone starts acting annoying.


----------



## 8-bit (Nov 2, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Telling my ex-girlfriend that I'm gay soon.
> 
> This should be fun.


----------



## PriestRevan (Nov 2, 2009)

Dass said:


> Yes, shakily.
> 
> Equally shocking; Darth Vader is Luke's father.



'bout fucking time.


----------



## JMAA (Nov 3, 2009)

Not to say I'm gay, but I'm almost bisexual. I'm more oriented to women for things like weddings and serious relationships.
Also I have this "artist syndrome" that makes me imitate Ainhander fapping on the bed. Just to recreate it because I like it or because of practice on the plot.


----------



## darkdoomer (Nov 3, 2009)

i dare anyone to explain the point of this thread on a anthro/furry art-porn and techno music site. i

cause i really don't see any.


----------



## Mako (Nov 3, 2009)

darkdoomer said:


> i dare anyone to explain the point of this thread on a anthro/furry art-*porn* and techno music site. i
> 
> cause i really don't see any.



You said it right there, bud.


----------



## Surgat (Nov 3, 2009)

darkdoomer said:


> i dare anyone to explain the point of this thread on a anthro/furry art-porn and techno music site. i
> 
> cause i really don't see any.



To share and discuss each other's experiences with coming out, and for users to ask for advice regarding how to go about doing that (e.g. the appropriate time or circumstances) if they have not done so already.

What the mainsite is about is irrelevant; this is the off-topic section of a discussion forum. The topic is of some relevance to the interests of a good portion of its users.


----------



## Takun (Nov 3, 2009)

darkdoomer said:


> i dare anyone to explain the point of this thread on a anthro/furry art-porn and techno music site. i
> 
> cause i really don't see any.




Techolol.


----------



## InunekoReborn (Nov 9, 2009)

Nick said:


> I don't see the need to tell parents things like that. It's not something that I'd want to discuss with them or that I'd want them to know. If they find out then, so be it.



I fall into that category too, I feel that when I'll be with a boyfriend and settled, then it would be time to say so. It might look easier for a bisexual but looking for guys in a hick-like town, next to a wide capital that has people sticking in their own bubbles... not fun =/


----------



## TheGreatCrusader (Nov 10, 2009)

darkdoomer said:


> i dare anyone to explain the point of this thread on a anthro/furry art-porn and techno music site. i
> 
> cause i really don't see any.


It's because a large percentage of furries are gay/bi and are at the age to come out. Why shouldn't it be here? Should every thread on the board have to do with fandom? This IS in Off Topic.


----------



## JarlArild (Nov 27, 2009)

I need advice I want to come out to my family but don't know how to do it. They all believe that being gay is a sin and all gays will burn in hell. Do I just not tell them or what?


----------



## Ibuuyk (Nov 27, 2009)

JarlArild said:


> I need advice I want to come out to my family but don't know how to do it. They all believe that being gay is a sin and all gays will burn in hell. Do I just not tell them or what?



Write it in your Facebook profile, that's how I did it ;P


----------



## Aurali (Nov 28, 2009)

JarlArild said:


> I need advice I want to come out to my family but don't know how to do it. They all believe that being gay is a sin and all gays will burn in hell. Do I just not tell them or what?



As I tell everyone, if you live with them, bad idea. wait til you move out.


----------



## JarlArild (Nov 28, 2009)

Good advice they would most likely get violent btw I have read several of your post and find them to be very good advice.


----------



## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Nov 28, 2009)

JarlArild said:


> I need advice I want to come out to my family but don't know how to do it. They all believe that being gay is a sin and all gays will burn in hell. Do I just not tell them or what?


 
Unless you are able to support yourself on your own, I advise you not to say anything.


----------



## Vivianite (Nov 28, 2009)

mmk, so my mother knows that I'm bi-curious and into this fandom.  Now my sister is coming home from college.  how the fuck am i going to explain THIS to her?  Shes older than me so let's clarify on that.


----------



## Jashwa (Nov 28, 2009)

Vivianite said:


> mmk, so my mother knows that I'm bi-curious and into this fandom.  Now my sister is coming home from college.  how the fuck am i going to explain THIS to her?  Shes older than me so let's clarify on that.


Don't.


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Vivianite said:


> mmk, so my mother knows that I'm bi-curious and into this fandom.  Now my sister is coming home from college.  how the fuck am i going to explain THIS to her?  Shes older than me so let's clarify on that.





Jashwa said:


> Don't.


Joshwa nailed it. Why the fuck do you have to say anything to her?


----------



## Jashwa (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Joshwa nailed it. Why the fuck do you have to say anything to her?


Why do you people keep fucking up my name? D:

It's either Jashwa or Joshua.  Pick one.


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Why do you people keep fucking up my name? D:
> 
> It's either Jashwa or Joshua.  Pick one.



Jawshoouh


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Why do you people keep fucking up my name? D:
> 
> It's either Jashwa or Joshua.  Pick one.


I pick ":3".



Hi :3


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> I pick ":3".
> 
> 
> 
> Hi :3



Then you're gonna be c==3


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> Then you're gonna be c==3


Sweet! c:


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Sweet! c:



ok nevermind

you are now vagina


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> ok nevermind
> 
> you are now vagina


FUCK YOU CHANGE ME BACK


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Wait, if it's your vagina, I'm fine with that, because I'll be surrounded by 5 penises c:


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Wait, if it's your vagina, I'm fine with that, because I'll be surrounded by 5 penises c:



I totally don't have a vagina.

My penis is just that huge.


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Wait, if it's your vagina, I'm fine with that, because I'll be surrounded by 5 penises c:



NO! NO!

RATTE'S VAGINA HASD TEETH!!! IT'LL BITE UR PENNUS OFFF :V


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> I totally don't have a vagina.
> 
> My penis is just that huge.


oh then

CHANGE ME BACK >:C


Darkwing said:


> NO! NO!
> 
> RATTE'S VAGINA HASD TEETH!!! IT'LL BITE UR PENNUS OFFF :V


No you misunderstand, I WILL be the vagina, so I'll be eating penis c:


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

Darkwing said:


> NO! NO!
> 
> RATTE'S VAGINA HASD TEETH!!! IT'LL BITE UR PENNUS OFFF :V



Totally.

Vagina go omnomnom



DarkNoctus said:


> oh then
> 
> CHANGE ME BACK >:C



No :3


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> No :3


You're not meant to be talking to :3, you're talking to me >:c

YOUR NON EXISTANT VAGINA THAT EATS COCK


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> Totally.
> 
> Vagina go omnomnom



IT'S A TRAP!!!! 

RATTE'S VAGINA IS A BLACK GUY HOLE, IT'LL SUCK OUT YOUR ENTIURE PELVIS!!!


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> You're not meant to be talking to :3, you're talking to me >:c
> 
> YOUR NON EXISTANT VAGINA THAT EATS COCK



:3



Darkwing said:


> IT'S A TRAP!!!!
> 
> RATTE'S VAGINA IS A BLACK GUY HOLE, IT'LL SUCK OUT YOUR ENTIURE PELVIS!!!



I accidentally a rapist once


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Darkwing said:


> IT'S A TRAP!!!!
> *
> NOCTUS* IS A BLACK GUY HOLE, IT'LL SUCK OUT YOUR ENTIURE PELVIS!!!


Fix'd. I'm her vagina now.

I'm part of her now.

I'm part of a monster.


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Nov 28, 2009)

Hey guys what's going on in this threa-

wth DB I leave for five minutes.


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

vaginas zomg


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Fix'd. I'm her vagina now.
> 
> I'm part of her now.
> 
> I'm part of a monster.



NO!!! NO!!!

RATTE'S VAGINA ISN'T A BLACK HOLE!!!

IT ACTUAULLY ABSORBS PEOPLE BECAUZ RATTE'S VAGINA LIEKS NOOTRICIUS MEALS!!!


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

they suck


But when surrounded by lots of dicks and eats dicks

thats what i want to be when i grow up <3


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

Sure is my vagina in here.


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> Sure is *Noctus* in here.


Fix'd.


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Fix'd.



My vagina is too cool to be you >:c


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> My vagina is too cool to be you >:c


:c

stfu fag


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> :c
> 
> stfu fag



ilu noctus


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> My vagina is too cool to be you >:c



NUUU!!!!

RATTE'S VAGINA DOESN'T EET PPL!!! IT ACTUALLY SMUGGLES ELLEGUL ALIUMS TO AMURRICUA!!!! 

RUN TO UR BASEMUNTS AND GRAB UR PENUS BECAUSE IT'S GONNA BE A LONG RIDE!!!


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> ilu noctus


<3~


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

Darkwing said:


> NUUU!!!!
> 
> RATTE'S VAGINA DOESN'T EET PPL!!! IT ACTUALLY SMUGGLES ELLEGUL ALIUMS TO AMURRICUA!!!!
> 
> RUN TO UR BASEMUNTS AND GRAB UR PENUS BECAUSE IT'S GONNA BE A LONG RIDE!!!



hot :V


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Nov 28, 2009)

Darkwing said:


> NUUU!!!!
> 
> RATTE'S VAGINA DOESN'T EET PPL!!! IT ACTUALLY SMUGGLES ELLEGUL ALIUMS TO AMURRICUA!!!!
> 
> RUN TO UR BASEMUNTS AND GRAB UR PENUS BECAUSE IT'S GONNA BE A LONG RIDE!!!


Do stand-up comedy.


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 28, 2009)

Ratte said:


> hot :V



NOOO!!!! RATTE'S VAGINA DOESN'T SMUGGLE ILLEGAL ALIENS!!! 

IT ACTUALLY BLOWS UP THE EARTH!!! HOLY SHIT GUIZ RUN WITH YOUR PEENUSSES WHILE YOU CAN!!!


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Darkwing said:


> NOOO!!!! RATTE'S VAGINA DOESN'T SMUGGLE ILLEGAL ALIENS!!!
> 
> IT ACTUALLY BLOWS UP THE EARTH!!! HOLY SHIT GUIZ RUN WITH YOUR PEENUSSES WHILE YOU CAN!!!


Dude shut up.


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Nov 28, 2009)

Darkwing said:


> NOOO!!!! RATTE'S VAGINA DOESN'T SMUGGLE ILLEGAL ALIENS!!!
> 
> IT ACTUALLY BLOWS UP THE EARTH!!! HOLY SHIT GUIZ RUN WITH YOUR PEENUSSES WHILE YOU CAN!!!


OMG!!! RANDUM XD

But really you're making an ass out of yourself and my art is labeled all over this.


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

OMG LULZ ROFLCOPTERRR XDDDDDD


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Dude shut up.



HOLY SHIT!!!!!

RATTEE'S VAGINA DOESN'T BLOW UP THE EARTH!!! IT ACTUALLY TOLD ME TO SHUT-UP!!!!

HOLY SHIT GUIZ!!! WE NEED TO HOSE HER VAGINA DOWN WITH OUR PEENUSSESS IT'S ON FIRE!!!!!!!!!


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

k guys shut up >:c


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

everyone tells me they want to set me on fire :c


----------



## Dass (Nov 28, 2009)

Agreed, shut up.


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 28, 2009)

HOLY SHIIT GUIZ WE JUSTG SUCCESSSSFULLY SAEVESD THE WURLD FRUM RATTEE'S VAGINA!!!!

HULY SHITT!!! ALL WE CAN DO IS SHUT UP NOW!!!

...Okay I is dun.


----------



## Vivianite (Nov 28, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Joshwa nailed it. Why the fuck do you have to say anything to her?



just if she decides to look over my shoulder and ask "whatcha doin'?"


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

Vivianite said:


> just if she decides to look over my shoulder and ask "whatcha doin'?"


Tell her you're talking to friends. Jesus.


----------



## Ratte (Nov 28, 2009)

Vivianite said:


> just if she decides to look over my shoulder and ask "whatcha doin'?"



I'M TALKING TO A RATTE WHO IS JUST ABOUT AN HOUR OR SO SOUTH FROM HERE

SHE'S A GIRL AND SHE'S TOTALLY NOT INTO YIFF


----------



## Hir (Nov 28, 2009)

+ she has a talking gothic vagina c:


----------



## Jashwa (Nov 28, 2009)

I like where this thread is going.

And that's my penis.


----------



## Hir (Nov 29, 2009)

Reminds me of...


----------



## Takun (Nov 29, 2009)

Wow...  I'd report this to Ratte but uhhhh?


----------



## Lukar (Nov 29, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> I like where this thread is going.
> 
> And that's my penis.



Can't wait to get there. ;3


----------



## Jashwa (Nov 29, 2009)

Lukar said:


> Can't wait to get there. ;3


God damnit.  You ruined it.

Now it's not going anymore :c


----------



## Lukar (Nov 29, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> God damnit.  You ruined it.
> 
> Now it's not going anymore :c



But. D=


----------



## ChrisPanda (Dec 10, 2009)

I'm gay now and came out to all my friends and my mum, so i'm pretty happy


----------



## Shumanki (Dec 10, 2009)

ok so i've finally admitted to my self that, yes in fact i am bi...i've tried saying that the feelngs are just because im really good friends with them, but yeah...i finally realized that it's more than that since i ahven't been able to stop thinking a guy from highschool i know is gay...amd yeah...this is my semi-coming out post...

also is a good i dea to tell a parent who is mostly open to things just before christmas, or should i wait?


----------



## Milo (Dec 10, 2009)

Shumanki said:


> ok so i've finally admitted to my self that, yes in fact i am bi...i've tried saying that the feelngs are just because im really good friends with them, but yeah...i finally realized that it's more than that since i ahven't been able to stop thinking a guy from highschool i know is gay...amd yeah...this is my semi-coming out post...
> 
> also is a good i dea to tell a parent who is mostly open to things just before christmas, or should i wait?



never come out to everyone at once.... big mistake. always go for one person at a time xD


----------



## Shumanki (Dec 10, 2009)

meh it's just a few friends, the people on here, and myself atm...so yeah..im taking it slow, but i feel like my mom should know...


----------



## Neothumper (Dec 10, 2009)

I'm bi and i love flirting with guys but most people i know personally think i'm straight cuz were i live people are very old fashioned and i feel like i'd be burned at the stake or something


----------



## Hir (Dec 11, 2009)

Neothumper said:


> I'm bi and i love flirting with guys but most people i know personally think i'm straight cuz were i live people are very old fashioned and i feel like i'd be burned at the stake or something


You're in England. They'll get over it.


----------



## Foxy_Boy (Dec 11, 2009)

I'd been straight for a long time and Im good at keeping friends, When I realised I was at least a little bit gay I was really depressed for about 2 days, but then I got over it, I never told anybody about it so far (well accept those I've gay relations with of course) I'm sure my friends might be a little suspicious about it, But I just try not to wear gay stuff around them, Now that I've been living like this for quite some time not much has really seemed to change in my lifesince I was only straight.


----------



## icecold24 (Dec 11, 2009)

I first realized I was bi at a basketball game ("wow that guy's got nice arms"). Initially I thought I was gay and was like OH NO I'M GAY but then I thought about this chick I liked and was like WAIT WTF I LIKE HER TOO??, then I learned what bisexuality was. 

As for coming out? I guess it's just the fact that I like both makes it easier to lay low, so I never really came out. But I've left hints, because I don't think anyone would give a shit if they knew anyway. Never something that really bothered me.


----------



## Gavrill (Dec 11, 2009)

Should I come out to my psychologist that I'm into guro?


----------



## ElizabethAlexandraMary (Dec 11, 2009)

Shenzebo said:


> Should I come out to my psychologist that I'm into guro?


Make a topic about it on gurochan before.
Print it out and give him the replies :V

And honestly, maybe, yeah. But don't get yourself into jail or an asylum D:


----------



## KaptainPig (Dec 12, 2009)

I made my coming-out to my mother. It was hard for her the believe me... I am really far from the stereotypes; I love guns, action movies, arts, video games, electronics, technology, I play airsoft, I love to go snowboarding, I'm serious, indifferent, ...and I like boys!


----------



## Hir (Dec 12, 2009)

KaptainPig said:


> I made my coming-out to my mother. It was hard for her the believe me... I am really far from the stereotypes; I love guns, action movies, arts, video games, electronics, technology, I play airsoft, I love to go snowboarding, I'm serious, indifferent, ...and I like boys!


Anyone can be gay~

Was she okay with it?


----------



## Shumanki (Dec 12, 2009)

KaptainPig said:


> I made my coming-out to my mother. It was hard for her the believe me... I am really far from the stereotypes; I love guns, action movies, arts, video games, electronics, technology, I play airsoft, I love to go snowboarding, I'm serious, indifferent, ...and I like boys!



lol for the most part i'm that also  the only thing that doesn't count is the airsoft XD

meh i'm bi, so that might be part of that also lol


----------



## Tweaker (Dec 12, 2009)

I came out a couple of months ago. I'd always had some sort of inkling that I was gay, but I always kept it to myself and pushed it in the back of my head for the longest time because I was too afraid to accept it in fear of how others would perceive me. It wasn't until I met a certain someone that I decided to come out with it, and people took it a _lot_ better than I expected. I don't regret it one bit. 

I will say, though, the anxiety as I did it was literally _crippling._ I normally don't care about how people see me--I'm my own person and I don't need others judging me--but there's a lot more implications behind being gay, especially living in a place like Florida. I grew up in schools where anything even remotely related to homosexuality was branded with top-tier disgust, so I didn't have a lot of confidence that it wouldn't come back on me horribly.

Overall, though, I'm glad I did it! One less thing I have to hide about myself.


----------



## KaptainPig (Dec 12, 2009)

DarkNoctus said:


> Was she okay with it?


 
She told me: "I though you were gonna tell me something super dramatic!"
She is cool with it.


----------



## seabeard (Dec 14, 2009)

Hot_Dragon said:


> I'd been straight for a long time and Im good at keeping friends, When I realised I was at least a little bit gay I was really depressed for about 2 days, but then I got over it, I never told anybody about it so far (well accept those I've gay relations with of course) I'm sure my friends might be a little suspicious about it, But I just try not to wear gay stuff around them, Now that I've been living like this for quite some time not much has really seemed to change in my lifesince I was only straight.



I did this for a long time, especially since I live in Texas, but by the time I was in  High School I just didn't care anymore. Even if it was a private school. Pretty much the entire student body knows that I'm gay, but yet, I still can't tell my parents. If anyone wants to live with it secret it's fine, surprisingly it is not too much of a burden on everyday life.


----------



## peacheskawaii (Dec 29, 2009)

i'm almost finished college now and being gay has never been easier or more comfortable. my parents know and they're fine with it. my brothers know, my whole family knows, and if my friends can't immediately tell, they can find out on facebook. 

high school was a bit rougher because the crowd was so closely-knit. at the time i was so desparate for a boyfriend too, and some sort of attachment. that, and having to learn how to deal with societal rejection (especially during debates about gay marriage, adoption, homophobia) was pretty hard at first. things definitely get easier as you grow into them. emotions run high as a teenager, and i'm glad things are smoothing out.


----------



## Hipster Doofus (Dec 30, 2009)

I had a nice, easy coming ou-
hahaha

They're never easy, are they?

I came out to myself fiveish years ago, around the tender age of thirteen. I was fine with it, I personally didn't struggle at all with my sexuality until this past year. I came out to my mother about a year and a half ago, and she took it well enough, so I figured, "hey, I'll tell dad! How could this go wrong?" 
These thoughts were, of course, in spite of the fact I knew he was a large contributer to the GOP, and various crazy fundie groups. He didn't take it well, and, when he found out about my stealing of various items from his medicine chest, I was sent off to a christian rehab/hiking program. For four months I was there. No internet, no TV, no drugs, no guys. Only me, and the 30 other people who's parents had sent them there. Included were five people who I was often sent out on two-week long "expeditions" with. I grew close to these people, including one, a girl. One day, as I was packing up camp, she came over, and hugged me. Now, I'm used to hugging between friends, it's common practice for us. But this one was different, her body language was different. She looked up at me, and I looked down at her, and feelings welled up in me and we ended up kissing quite passionately. We continued to hook up, going gradually further and further, and completely wrecking the notion of myself as "completely gay" that I had had. I got over it, and when my dad caught wind he withdrew me from the program. Shame it took three months of torturous hiking. I only missed one because of my parental withdrawal.

My friends at home joke that the program worked. It didn't, I guess I'm just incidentally bi. No big deal. But my coming out could have been a lot goddamn better.


----------



## Jashwa (Dec 30, 2009)

Hipster Doofus said:


> , no guys. Only me, and the 30 other people


So were the 30 all girls or did you just misspeak when you said no guys?


----------



## Hipster Doofus (Dec 30, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> So were the 30 all girls or did you just misspeak when you said no guys?


I meant no *available* gay guys, sorry.
They were there, but we couldn't hook up or there'd be disastrous consequences. Durr, posting is hard.


----------



## Jashwa (Dec 30, 2009)

Hipster Doofus said:


> I meant no *available* gay guys, sorry.
> They were there, but we couldn't hook up or there'd be disastrous consequences. Durr, posting is hard.


Oh, gotcha.  

You should've hooked up and then sued them for the consequences.


----------



## Hipster Doofus (Dec 30, 2009)

Jashwa said:


> Oh, gotcha.
> 
> You should've hooked up and then sued them for the consequences.


I wish this place had a smug icon like SA does, because what I'm about to say merits it.

I would've, because I'm not a pussy like the other guys there. The gay guys there were mostly middle-state god fearing christians, who were so confused, angry, and disappointed with themselves they weren't willing to face themselves, and had been late-night browsing gay porn or the like. The addicts there were mostly meth addicts from the boonies. I was the only one of both groups, and I don't like to associate with either meth addicts or christians like that, so I gravitated to the others with similar temperaments, who were the group I mentioned earlier. 

Enough of me, though, on with the thread.


----------



## Hottigress (Jan 18, 2010)

Gay : D


----------



## Hir (Jan 18, 2010)

Hottigress said:


> Gay : D


what


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Jan 18, 2010)

Hottigress said:


> Gay : D


How's the boyfriend.


----------



## 2-Tailed Taymon (Jan 18, 2010)

I'd come out of the closet, but then all my freshly dead owl friends would be shown to the world too *sniffle*


----------



## mcwolfe (Jan 23, 2010)

I'd love to tell everyone that I'm gay...tough part is that noone near me is gay >_<" (except for girly boys which are a huge turn off for me).

The only person I told that is my kindergarten friend;kind of funny; she never noticed it before I told her (or so she says).
Hm,my family, wouldn't be good to tell them - I once overheard a conversation between my parents.
The topic was me, at that time I didn't have a girlfriend and my dad already wondered if I'm gay.He told my mom that he'd throw me out and wouldn't want to hear anything from me...ever (That really did hurt, hearing that he'd throw me out just because I like the same gender)

Since then I'm pretending to be a normal heterosexual guy (I even dated girls, what I really hate - I just can't seem to see them as more as friends), well anyway I'll just finish my A-levels and then leave the country, won't go back then... I really hope that I'd find a cute gay furry overseas - kind of sucks to be the only one liking that in a circumcircle of ~ 50 miles. 

I honestly can't wait till that happens; finally breaking free and getting rid of the mask I'm wearing for too long by now - as mask I never wanted to wear in the first place.


----------



## Revy (Jan 23, 2010)

gurly bois are hawt


----------



## mcwolfe (Jan 23, 2010)

Not for me c_c
I'm gay and want a guy...a MAN not a boy who likes being girly


----------



## Thatch (Jan 23, 2010)

Teto said:


> How's the boyfriend.



That's his own alt.


----------



## Kanin (Jan 23, 2010)

Revy said:


> gurly bois are hawt



^This. :3


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 24, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> ^This. :3



Seconded.


----------



## Dass (Jan 24, 2010)

Came out by accident to my father a while back. He saw me post a somewhat gay post on another website (why was he watching my internet activity without telling me? I think that's illegal somehow)

However he thinks I'm having doubts, rather than being 98%* sure of the fact.
*Arbitrary


----------



## mcwolfe (Jan 24, 2010)

^
I pretty much disabled his security (he started to watch my internet activity as well), but well it's disabled and he doesn't know it


----------



## Kyle Necronomicon (Jan 26, 2010)

I am stuck in this thread ONOS COMING RIGHT AT ME WITH IT'S GIANT HORNS! anyway I'm not gay but if you are, I totally support you and you should come out. But maybe one should stay in the closet to make sure no weirdo's get in there(also i love the silence day it makes me feel so nice at my old school where 90% of people did it OH GOD THE SILENCE GAVE ME AN ERECTION it was so good the whole people not talking and everything was so much more beautiful.)


----------



## Rsyk (Jan 26, 2010)

Kyle Necronomicon said:


> I am stuck in this thread ONOS COMING RIGHT AT ME WITH IT'S GIANT HORNS! anyway I'm not gay but if you are, I totally support you and you should come out. But maybe one should stay in the closet to make sure no weirdo's get in there(also i love the silence day it makes me feel so nice at my old school where 90% of people did it OH GOD THE SILENCE GAVE ME AN ERECTION it was so good the whole people not talking and everything was so much more beautiful.)


WTF???


----------



## Jashwa (Jan 26, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> WTF???


I read it as well.  It wasn't even worth my time to be mean towards.


----------



## Takun (Jan 26, 2010)

I find that I can not leave this thread. (This is no good. I fear that it is like a bull running full speed at with it's dangerous horns of a large stature in my direction!)  Sorry for that tangent, I totally support people who are coming out and I believe it is the right idea; maybe one homosexual should stay in the closet just to make sure that peculiar people do not fill it in their stead.  I apologize for this second tangent in advance, but I must tell you all how much I love silence day at my school.  Last year around 90% of the student body and facility participated and the overwhelming lack of noise was so grand that it caused my penis to stand at attention.


----------



## Rsyk (Jan 26, 2010)

Takumi_L said:


> I find that I can not leave this thread. (This is no good. I fear that it is like a bull running full speed at with it's dangerous horns of a large stature in my direction!)  Sorry for that tangent, I totally support people who are coming out and I believe it is the right idea; maybe one homosexual should stay in the closet just to make sure that peculiar people do not fill it in their stead.  I apologize for this second tangent in advance, but I must tell you all how much I love silence day at my school.  Last year around 90% of the student body and facility participated and the overwhelming lack of noise was so grand that it caused my penis to stand at attention.


The translation is funnier than the original post.


----------



## Kyle Necronomicon (Feb 1, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> The translation is funnier than the original post.



yep just do that to all my posts and you'll see how I'd most likely say it.


----------



## Chiper12 (Feb 5, 2010)

Havn't told a soul. Though my father probably caught on, with how I act time from time. Not girly, that's for sure. Mother would likely refuse to believe being the christian that she is.


----------



## Koray (Feb 5, 2010)

Kyle Necronomicon said:


> I am stuck in this thread ONOS COMING RIGHT AT ME WITH IT'S GIANT HORNS! anyway I'm not gay but if you are, I totally support you and you should come out. But maybe one should stay in the closet to make sure no weirdo's get in there(also i love the silence day it makes me feel so nice at my old school where 90% of people did it OH GOD THE SILENCE GAVE ME AN ERECTION it was so good the whole people not talking and everything was so much more beautiful.)



..huh? 


anyway, haven't told anyone else other than my mum, one of my cousins and pretty much every furry I know online...


----------



## Aenn (Feb 14, 2010)

uh, not sure where this is going anymore...


----------



## Hir (Feb 14, 2010)

Kyle Necronomicon said:


> I am stuck in this thread ONOS COMING RIGHT AT ME WITH IT'S GIANT HORNS! anyway I'm not gay but if you are, I totally support you and you should come out. But maybe one should stay in the closet to make sure no weirdo's get in there(also i love the silence day it makes me feel so nice at my old school where 90% of people did it OH GOD THE SILENCE GAVE ME AN ERECTION it was so good the whole people not talking and everything was so much more beautiful.)


I-

I just....




God......You've left me totally speechless....

Fucking hell...


----------



## Largentum_Wolf (Feb 14, 2010)

DarkNoctus said:


> I-
> 
> I just....
> 
> ...


 exactly my thoughts. Well.. Ive come out to the whole neighborhood since my last post, I told one neighbor and before the week was out everyone was asking if it was true, now they know... wtf is up with all the the girls treating me like ive somehow become delicate now that Im openly gay? as if ive undergone some magicle transformation and become a fairy. since ive not been on this thread for a time, is it worth reading through the last 15 pages or whatever ive missed?


----------



## Hir (Feb 14, 2010)

Nah, not worth it.

I plan to come out sometime. c:


----------



## Largentum_Wolf (Feb 14, 2010)

why not today!?  cupids a fag.. right? shooting all the pplz of the world in the ass with his arrows of love


----------



## Leon (Feb 14, 2010)

Largentum_Wolf said:


> why not today!? cupids a fag.. right? shooting all the pplz of the world in the ass with his arrows of love


 
Nicely put.:V


----------



## Largentum_Wolf (Feb 14, 2010)

leon said:


> Nicely put.:V


 thnx, put allot o thought into that one


----------



## Hir (Feb 14, 2010)

Not whilst I'm living with my Dad. Not a good idea.


----------



## Largentum_Wolf (Feb 17, 2010)

DarkNoctus said:


> Not whilst I'm living with my Dad. Not a good idea.


 I dont blame you for not telling your dad. I dont live at home, no way Ill catck flack from my parents for coming out, Im still not calling them up to chat bout that. Your best mates know?


----------



## Hir (Feb 17, 2010)

Largentum_Wolf said:


> I dont blame you for not telling your dad. I dont live at home, no way Ill catck flack from my parents for coming out, Im still not calling them up to chat bout that. Your best mates know?


A select few of them, yes. The ones whom I'm sure will be okay with it. They weren't surprised, either.


----------



## hornedcat (Feb 17, 2010)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> I keep dropping hints when I'm talking to my parents, but I don't think they're noticing. >_>



Dude, parents seem to see and hear what they want to hear, it's truely exasperating. I don't know how obvious the hints are you dropped, and they probably did notice, but likely think you are making smart remarks. And ironically that might even cement your assumed heterosexuality to them, being comfortable enough with your sexuality and self esteem to say gay things. Some people I have known have just acted and said gay things all the time, and people around them just thought they were funny heteros.  In my experience, people seem to only have supernatural gaydar, or need to be smacked in the face with "I AM GAY" in order to even know....  I even came out to my dad when I was blackout drunk and never said anything since about it. He just thinks I was being crazy cause I was drunk and still thinks I am straight...  *I apologize for the long winded rant.*


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 19, 2010)

My dad now knows after my photography project (Which had to be made in the form of a book) arrived in the post. I didn't think he got the subtle hints until he asked me "Do you wanna watch this movie? It has Justin Timberlake in it!"

I'm not sure whether I should be happy he's not freaking out about it or be slightly miffed that he thinks I've suddenly becoming a flamer. I mean I do have a few gay qualities but Justin Timberlake? Seriously?


----------



## Takun (Feb 19, 2010)

hornedcat said:


> Dude, parents seem to see and hear what they want to hear, it's truely exasperating. I don't know how obvious the hints are you dropped, and they probably did notice, but likely think you are making smart remarks. And ironically that might even cement your assumed heterosexuality to them, being comfortable enough with your sexuality and self esteem to say gay things. Some people I have known have just acted and said gay things all the time, and people around them just thought they were funny heteros.  In my experience, people seem to only have supernatural gaydar, or need to be smacked in the face with "I AM GAY" in order to even know....  I even came out to my dad when I was blackout drunk and never said anything since about it. He just thinks I was being crazy cause I was drunk and still thinks I am straight...  *I apologize for the long winded rant.*



Before I came out my mom would sometimes be like "You'll understand when you get married and have kids.  Unless you don't swing that way HAHAHA."

I would just sit quietly and not answer.  Yeah she never got it.


----------



## Stawks (Feb 19, 2010)

Takun said:


> Before I came out my mom would sometimes be like "You'll understand when you get married and have kids.  Unless you don't swing that way HAHAHA."
> 
> I would just sit quietly and not answer.  Yeah she never got it.



This happens to me all the time. 

It's sort of funny, I think. I like when my grandad asks when I'm going to get a girlfriend. When I laugh awkwardly, he looks so damn sad. 

Wonder if he gets it.


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

My sister suspects it becuase she asked me the other day, "Tristin are you gay?!?", I was like..... And I think my dad has his suspisions, but idk.


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

Takun said:


> Before I came out my mom would sometimes be like "You'll understand when you get married and have kids. Unless you don't swing that way HAHAHA."
> 
> I would just sit quietly and not answer. Yeah she never got it.


 
I haven't come out to my dad yet, but he does stuff just like that. Though I often do my sarcastic laugh in response, he still hasn't gotten it. ._.

Though I am bi, so whatever. But he is one of those people that thinks that there is no such thing as bisexual, he thinks that you're either straight or gay. :I


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> I haven't come out to my dad yet, but he does stuff just like that. Though I often do my sarcastic laugh in response, he still hasn't gotten it. ._.
> 
> Though I am bi, so whatever. But he is one of those people that thinks that there is no such thing as bisexual, he thinks that you're either straight or gay. :I


My mom's like that. But she thinks that if you're bisexual, you're either doing it for attention or sex...


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> My mom's like that. But she thinks that if you're bisexual, you're either doing it for attention or sex...


 
My dad thinks if you say you're bi that you're just too scared to admit you're completely gay. :I


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> My dad thinks if you say you're bi that you're just too scared to admit you're completely gay. :I


 

My mom is one of the people that anything that has to do with liking the same sex is "A phase", it pisses me off.


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> My mom is one of the people that anything that has to do with liking the same sex is "A phase", it pisses me off.


 
Lol. That sucks.

I don't feel like telling my dad, I think I'll just let him find out if I bring a guy home. XD


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> My dad thinks if you say you're bi that you're just too scared to admit you're completely gay. :I


?

Bisexual guys have worse reputations than gay guys. What's there to be scared off?


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> ?
> 
> Bisexual guys have worse reputations than gay guys. What's there to be scared off?


 
Idk.


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> Lol. That sucks.
> 
> I don't feel like telling my dad, I think I'll just let him find out if I bring a guy home. XD


Jesus Christ...
My mom would have a heart attack. Then she'd kill me. 



Lord Kanin said:


> Idk.


Seriously.


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> Jesus Christ...
> My mom would have a heart attack. Then she'd kill me.


 
My dad doesn't have a problem with gays, he just doesn't know anything really about homosexuality, and also he's the type that makes jokes about anything he can. :I


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> Lol. That sucks.
> 
> I don't feel like telling my dad, I think I'll just let him find out if I bring a guy home. XD


 
I dont want to tell my parents either cuase my dad would have a stroke and my mom would try and tell me it's a phase. :/


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> I dont want to tell my parents either cuase my dad would have a stroke and my mom would try and tell me it's a phase. :/


 
That's when you tell them you've been secretly together for a year. :V


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> That's when you tell them you've been secretly together for a year. :V


 
Dude... bricks would be shat..


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> Dude... bricks would be shat..


 
Lol. But that might kill your mom's phase thing. :V


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> That's when you tell them you've been secretly together for a year. :V


That's kinda of sad...
Mostly because if I ever date a guy, that's how my parents would find out.



leon said:


> Dude... bricks would be shat..


lol


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

My mom and step dad know I'm bi, my mom saw a bit of one of my chats once. She talked to me about it, no biggy but a little embarrassing, I had to clarify that I'm bi sense all she saw was a small part of one of my chats.


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> My mom and step dad know I'm bi, my mom saw a bit of one of my chats once. She talked to me about it, no biggy but a little embarrassing, I had to clarify that I'm bi sense all she saw was a small part of one of my chats.


 
Thats how my sister kinda found out, she saw a gay rp i was doin.. yeah.. it was awkward..


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> Thats how my sister kinda found out, she saw a gay rp i was doin.. yeah.. it was awkward..


 
My mom and step dad were completely fine with it, everything has been normal. Though they were kind of prepared and expecting it.


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> My mom and step dad were completely fine with it, everything has been normal. Though they were kind of prepared and expecting it.


 
I'm thinking of coming out to them next national comeing out day. :V


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> I'm thinking of coming out to them next national comeing out day. :V


 
Lol.

Oh and to clarify, they weren't expecting it from me, they were expecting it from my little brother. XD


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> Lol.
> 
> Oh and to clarify, they weren't expecting it from me, they were expecting it from my little brother. XD


 
Rofl really? that's fucked on so many levels..


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> Rofl really? that's fucked on so many levels..


 
It's true. My step dad actually said, "I always expected it to be [insert my little brother's name here]". XD


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> It's true. My step dad actually said, "I always expected it to be [insert my little brother's name here]". XD


 
Wow.. I think the hardest part of explaining to my parents is that i've never been with a guy so they'd be like "your not bi you want attention."


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> It's true. My step dad actually said, "I always expected it to be [insert my little brother's name here]". XD


Scientifically speaking, the younger siblings do have a greater chance of being gay (or bisexual). By about .0000000001%

Also, oldest child here. ^.^


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> Scientifically speaking, the younger siblings do have a greater chance of being gay (or bisexual). By about .0000000001%
> 
> Also, oldest child here. ^.^


 
I'm technically the middle child, but I'm my mom's oldest.


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> Scientifically speaking, the younger siblings do have a greater chance of being gay (or bisexual). By about .0000000001%
> 
> Also, oldest child here. ^.^


 
I'm the youngest. D'=


----------



## Rytes (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> I'm the youngest. D'=



fag :3


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Rytes said:


> fag :3


 
I'll show you fag. :3c


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> I'm the youngest. D'=


 
Same here, I'm the youngest in a family of four.


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> I'm technically the middle child, but I'm my mom's oldest.


When my mom re-married, I didn't get any step siblings. Which is fine by me.



leon said:


> I'm the youngest. D'=


lol


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> When my mom re-married, I didn't get any step siblings. Which is fine by me.
> 
> 
> lol


 

I'm sad now becuase I cuased a statistic to be right. 3=


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> When my mom re-married, I didn't get any step siblings. Which is fine by me.


 
I don't have any step siblings, but I have an older half brother.


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> I'm sad now becuase I cuased a statistic to be right. 3=


You are not a person anymore. You are a number on a graph. Congratulations. :V



Lord Kanin said:


> I don't have any step siblings, but I have an older half brother.


Ah. 
I'm just glad that my mom didn't marry a complete ass hole. But, he does have some stereotypical views on bi's as well.
Which might cause trouble for me, if I ever decide to come out.


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> I don't have any step siblings, but I have an older half brother.


 
Really off topic question but why does "it say hot hot hot" under my avatar, I never put it there...


Edit: WTF!?! its gone now..


----------



## Kanin (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> Really off topic question but why does "it say hot hot hot" under my avatar, I never put it there...
> 
> 
> Edit: WTF!?! its gone now..


 
It happens at a certain post count. XD


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> It happens at a certain post count. XD


 

Oh ok, I thought I was getting banned or something. XD


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> Oh ok, I thought I was getting banned or something. XD


Nope.
Mine said something about Pi when I was at 314.


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> Nope.
> Mine said something about Pi when I was at 314.


 
Strange.., I wonder whats after "you broke the 10k barrier still havent seen the sun.".


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 19, 2010)

leon said:


> Strange.., I wonder whats after "you broke the 10k barrier still havent seen the sun.".


Once you get one million post, you get the coveted, "WTF?!?!?!" title.


----------



## Leon (Feb 19, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> Once you get one million post, you get the coveted, "WTF?!?!?!" title.


 
Oh.. I thought a gun came out of the screen to shoot you.. for having no life..


----------



## Largentum_Wolf (Feb 20, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> I don't feel like telling my dad, I think I'll just let him find out if I bring a guy home. XD


 lol thats how my parents are going to find out. Ill tell them someone will be with me when I visit, and when I get there "btw this my boyfriend". Should be interesting


----------



## Viva (Feb 20, 2010)

I tell people one by one


----------



## Maddrow (Feb 20, 2010)

I told all of my friends.  But, since I'm a minor, I need to come out to my family if I want to get a new collar or make a fursuit.
Well, unless I get my frikin drivers license X3


----------



## Draegonis7 (Feb 20, 2010)

An old woman at a grocery store that I helped out asked me if I had a girlfriend, and then proceeded to blow my mind by adding "or a boyfriend". Heh, was cool talking with her about him. She gave me the advice that it doesn't matter what my parents think, they aren't dating him. Was an overal cool and unexpected experience.


----------



## njsykora (Feb 20, 2010)

My coming out was hilarious. I got screamed at for 3 hours by my mother (single parent house), then she went off and moaned about grandkids (I'm 1 of 5 kids, she currently has 3 grandkids). This was the bad bit, but the next day she'd calmed down and her motherly guilt had kicked in so I got bought cake. I think a little bit of that guilt has remained to this day. The family in general took up the "we know, we've always known" approach. These days it's just not important enough to ever get mentioned. That's the perfect situation for me.


----------



## Viva (Feb 20, 2010)

njsykora said:


> My coming out was hilarious. I got screamed at for 3 hours by my mother (single parent house), then she went off and moaned about grandkids (I'm 1 of 5 kids, she currently has 3 grandkids). This was the bad bit, but the next day she'd calmed down and her motherly guilt had kicked in so I got bought cake. I think a little bit of that guilt has remained to this day. The family in general took up the "we know, we've always known" approach. These days it's just not important enough to ever get mentioned. That's the perfect situation for me.


 
LOL Interesting story.

And wonderful first post.


----------



## njsykora (Feb 20, 2010)

I love coming out stories, also love helping out people struggling to come out so I can see myself becoming quite active in this thread.


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 20, 2010)

njsykora said:


> I love coming out stories, also love helping out people struggling to come out so I can see myself becoming quite active in this thread.


Not everyone needs to come out. It depends on your personal situation.


----------



## Viva (Feb 20, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> Not everyone needs to come out. It depends on your personal situation.


 
It also depends on your definition of coming out


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 21, 2010)

VivaLaPh!va said:


> It also depends on your definition of coming out


--;


----------



## njsykora (Feb 21, 2010)

My definition: Straight up telling people you're gay. So I agree not everyone needs to come out, for them it's either just something that's obvious from behavior (like chatting up a guy or being in a gay bar) or something that someone doesn't need to know. I wish I'd held that mindset when I came out, would've saved a hell of a lot of screaming. Though probably yielded less cake.


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Feb 25, 2010)

I told my sister a few days ago and my dad last night over the phone.

As of now I'm openly bi with a boyfriend, of the very few bad things that have been said towards me, my friends proceeded to crush with encouragement. :3


----------



## Qoph (Feb 25, 2010)

Happy coming out stories make me :3, and stories of parents flipping shit and yelling at/grounding/kicking out their kids make me fucking RAGE.  So it's always an adventure when I read these stories.


----------



## Kanin (Feb 25, 2010)

Qoph said:


> Happy coming out stories make me :3, and stories of parents flipping shit and yelling at/grounding/kicking out their kids make me fucking RAGE.  So it's always an adventure when I read these stories.



Too bad people barely post any anymore. :I


----------



## Leon (Feb 25, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> Too bad people barely post any anymore. :I


 
I'll post my coming out story when I finally get the balls to tell my parents. :3


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 25, 2010)

Lord Kanin said:


> Too bad people barely post any anymore. :I



I will when I decide to come out to somebody. 

But meh, a lot of people suspect me already since I'm being a whore towards this one guy.


----------



## Mathix (Feb 26, 2010)

I didn't came out... My parents pulled me out. When I was somehow depressed (Or at least not my normal happy self) They started asking these difficult questions. The last part went something like this:

Dad: What's wrong?
Me: Nothing.....
Dad: I'm sure something's bothering you.
Me: So?....
Dad: Are you in love?
Me: Yes...
Dad: Doesn't sound that cheerful.. Is your love a boy?
Me Yes...
Dad: Aha well thats great!
Me: Meh... Leave me alone >_<

They accepted it all.
More things where bothering me that day but this was one heavy weight that fell of my shoulders.

The most awesome reaction to my coming out was my brother's
When I told him, his reaction was:
"FUCK! Now our parents only count on me for providing grandchildren! Fuck! I hate children. DX"
Didn't saw that one coming xD

Everyone took it positively. Maybe that's the advantage for living the most gay-excepting country in the world.


----------



## Revy (Feb 26, 2010)

Qoph said:


> Happy coming out stories make me :3, and stories of parents flipping shit and yelling at/grounding/kicking out their kids make me fucking RAGE. So it's always an adventure when I read these stories.


 Thats because they're like FUCK WTF DID WE DO WRONG? Now hes gonna suck dicks for the rest of his life and I DONT LIKE IT, GTFO MY HOUSE U FAGGOT.

:c


----------



## Leon (Feb 26, 2010)

Revy said:


> Thats because they're like FUCK WTF DID WE DO WRONG? Now hes gonna suck dicks for the rest of his life and I DONT LIKE IT, GTFO MY HOUSE U FAGGOT.
> 
> :c


 
Do you speak from exsperience?


----------



## Mulefa Zalif (Feb 27, 2010)

Mathix said:


> Everyone took it positively. Maybe that's the advantage for living the most gay-excepting country in the world.


Which country is that?


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 27, 2010)

Mulefa Zalif said:


> Which country is that?



Canada.


----------



## Rsyk (Feb 27, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Canada.


That's because Canada can't reject anyone. 
They even accepted the French.
That entire country is to damn friendly.


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 27, 2010)

Rsyk said:


> That's because Canada can't reject anyone.
> They even accepted the French.
> That entire country is to damn friendly.



I know xD

So true.


----------



## Leon (Feb 27, 2010)

Isn't weed legal in canada?


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 27, 2010)

leon said:


> Isn't weed legal in canada?



In some parts yes.


----------



## Leon (Feb 27, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> In some parts yes.


 
No wonder there so accepting..


----------



## Mathix (Feb 27, 2010)

Mulefa Zalif said:


> Which country is that?


The Netherlands ;]

Well Maybe Canada too but I don't live there so I can't judge that way.
Weed is legal here too btw.. Maybe that's the link? xP

Why I think my country is one of the most accepting countries? Well for a start: The Netherlands was the first country to legalize same-sex marriage. The Netherlands is also one of the most secular countries in Western Europe with 50% of it's population being non religious. 
No religion means no feeding ground for religion based gay bashing, equals more acceptance? Just a guess from my part. 

(hope the last sentence is clear, Didn't quite knew how to phrase it xO  )
(Please don't mind my 'Explain --> explane' or 'Exceptence --> Acceptance' errors. English is not my mother tongue, and I have dyslexia Dx )


----------



## Draegonis7 (Mar 2, 2010)

So, I'm going to be visiting family back in Kazakstan this summer, and I just now that like the past two times I have visited, they are going to ask me if I have a girlfriend yet. For a while whenever anybody I didn't really feel like telling asked that, I answered that no, I don't. While its technically true, it doesn't feel like the truth when I say it. I've kinda resolved to answer something to the effect of I have a boyfriend to most people nowadays.

I really kinda feel like just telling that to my family, but, I'm apprehensive, considering that attitudes aren't quite as advance back in former soviet republics. Its kinda a bothersome predicament for me, cause I don't want to screw myself over while visiting, but at the same time I don't feel like being dishonest with myself.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 2, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> So, I'm going to be visiting family back in Kazakstan this summer, and I just now that like the past two times I have visited, they are going to ask me if I have a girlfriend yet. For a while whenever anybody I didn't really feel like telling asked that, I answered that no, I don't. While its technically true, it doesn't feel like the truth when I say it. I've kinda resolved to answer something to the effect of I have a boyfriend to most people nowadays.
> 
> I really kinda feel like just telling that to my family, but, I'm apprehensive, considering that attitudes aren't quite as advance back in former soviet republics. Its kinda a bothersome predicament for me, cause I don't want to screw myself over while visiting, but at the same time I don't feel like being dishonest with myself.



well i have the same problem, mine is more well political if you will, my family is just full of republicans i myself am a liberal, so i don't know how to tell them. I'd really prefer to have a mate with me for you know emotional support. idk how that would help you because you have family in a different country. If you want help i guess the only thing to do is be 100% 
honest.

I mean they are your parents after all. And i may just have to take my own advice on this one but even if they don't accept the way you are at first i'm sure they will still love you. I hope this helps your problem at all, best wishes to you and you love.


----------



## Draegonis7 (Mar 2, 2010)

I already basically came out(was more discovered) to my parents, they didn't like it, but nothing really came of it. Although now, they have either forgotten or are pretending it didn't happen. I plan to tell them again in a while, when I have a better opportunity again.

This summer, we are visiting grandparents, aunts, uncles, all that jazz. My only worry is that even though I don't like it, my grandmothers would probably be disappointed. I don't know if I could do that to them this late in their life.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 2, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> I already basically came out(was more discovered) to my parents, they didn't like it, but nothing really came of it. Although now, they have either forgotten or are pretending it didn't happen. I plan to tell them again in a while, when I have a better opportunity again.
> 
> This summer, we are visiting grandparents, aunts, uncles, all that jazz. My only worry is that even though I don't like it, my grandmothers would probably be disappointed. I don't know if I could do that to them this late in their life.


oh i see your problem now, my grandfather is the same way,


----------



## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Mar 3, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> So, I'm going to be visiting family back in Kazakstan this summer, and I just now that like the past two times I have visited, they are going to ask me if I have a girlfriend yet. For a while whenever anybody I didn't really feel like telling asked that, I answered that no, I don't. While its technically true, it doesn't feel like the truth when I say it. I've kinda resolved to answer something to the effect of I have a boyfriend to most people nowadays.
> 
> I really kinda feel like just telling that to my family, but, I'm apprehensive, considering that attitudes aren't quite as advance back in former soviet republics. Its kinda a bothersome predicament for me, cause I don't want to screw myself over while visiting, but at the same time I don't feel like being dishonest with myself.


 
Don't tell them about it.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 3, 2010)

Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs said:


> Don't tell them about it.


read the other two posts


----------



## njsykora (Mar 3, 2010)

Give them the choice, it's either they accept it or they lose a son. Sounds harsh but it works.


----------



## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Mar 3, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> read the other two posts


 
Nah, that's alright.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 3, 2010)

njsykora said:


> Give them the choice, it's either they accept it or they lose a son. Sounds harsh but it works.


that is harsh


----------



## Leon (Mar 4, 2010)

Thinking of coming out to my parents soon, might as well sooner rather than later.


----------



## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Mar 4, 2010)

leon said:


> Thinking of coming out to my parents soon, might as well sooner rather than later.


 
Do it when you are out of the house, if are already, then go ahead.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 5, 2010)

Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs said:


> Do it when you are out of the house, if are already, then go ahead.


but still think about thanksgiving christmas etc etc


----------



## Leon (Mar 5, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> but still think about thanksgiving christmas etc etc


 
I'm thinking of doing it when I get a boyfriend,I'm just worrying about my dad, he is the kind of guy who cant stand gays and think it's just some fad, that and I hide it around him fairly well so I dont think he'll believe me..


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 5, 2010)

leon said:


> I'm thinking of doing it when I get a boyfriend,I'm just worrying about my dad, he is the kind of guy who cant stand gays and think it's just some fad, that and I hide it around him fairly well so I dont think he'll believe me..


oh jeez i know that one all to well like i posted earlier, my family is republican to my liberal, so my dad is a hardcore perfectionist who can't stand the idea of two males being together. for Christ's sake he voted yes to prop 8. really pisses me off to know that my own dad voted yes to ban gay marriage. 

i know why you might want to have a mate when you tell your parents, i know i would want my mate right there with me, for like emotional support and all but you know also to show my parents that i'm not just some sort of freak, if that makes sense heh....


----------



## Leon (Mar 5, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> oh jeez i know that one all to well like i posted earlier, my family is republican to my liberal, so my dad is a hardcore perfectionist who can't stand the idea of two males being together. for Christ's sake he voted yes to prop 8. really pisses me off to know that my own dad voted yes to ban gay marriage.
> 
> i know why you might want to have a mate when you tell your parents, i know i would want my mate right there with me, for like emotional support and all but you know also to show my parents that i'm not just some sort of freak, if that makes sense heh....


 
Funny how i'm a hardcore conservative yet still bi-sexual, and yes that makes sense, I just think it would lighten the load and make it easier to go through with.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 5, 2010)

leon said:


> Funny how i'm a hardcore conservative yet still bi-sexual, and yes that makes sense, I just think it would lighten the load and make it easier to go through with.


thank you, most people call me weak when i say that i would want my mate there with me for support. i get why don't you just grow a pair and tell them.... alll the time lol


----------



## Leon (Mar 6, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> thank you, most people call me weak when i say that i would want my mate there with me for support. i get why don't you just grow a pair and tell them.... alll the time lol


 
It's not weak, everyone needs a little support every now and then, another reason I don't tell them is becuase I don't really have a need to yet.


----------



## Nylak (Mar 6, 2010)

leon said:


> I'm thinking of doing it when I get a boyfriend,I'm just worrying about my dad, he is the kind of guy who cant stand gays and think it's just some fad, that and I hide it around him fairly well so I dont think he'll believe me..


 
Just don't even think about breaking it to em with your boyfriend present if your partner is crazy/furry/"special".

Trust me on this.  It makes it waywayway worse.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 6, 2010)

leon said:


> It's not weak, everyone needs a little support every now and then, another reason I don't tell them is becuase I don't really have a need to yet.


 agreed and this may not seem like the right thing to do but do you think i should tell my parents that im both gay and a furry at the same time?


----------



## Leon (Mar 6, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> agreed and this may not seem like the right thing to do but do you think i should tell my parents that im both gay and a furry at the same time?


 
To be honest, there's no reason to tell them you're a fur, it's just a hobby, and they might try and connect the two together, which just seems like alot more hassle than necessary.



Nylak said:


> Just don't even think about breaking it to em with your boyfriend present if your partner is crazy/furry/"special".
> 
> Trust me on this. It makes it waywayway worse.


 
Yeah I don't plan on having them there, but then again, I don't see myself with anyone soon, let alone a guy.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 6, 2010)

leon said:


> To be honest, there's no reason to tell them you're a fur, it's just a hobby, and they might try and connect the two together, which just seems like alot more hassle than necessary.
> 
> 
> 
> Yeah I don't plan on having them there, but then again, I don't see myself with anyone soon, let alone a guy.


thank you i needed some insight into maybe what i should do.


----------



## Leon (Mar 6, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> thank you i needed some insight into maybe what i should do.


 
No problem, tell us how it goes.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 6, 2010)

leon said:


> No problem, tell us how it goes.


seeing as how i won't find a mate to settle down with for a looong time i have reached the conclusion that i must do it alone like always,


----------



## Leon (Mar 6, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> seeing as how i won't find a mate to settle down with for a looong time i have reached the conclusion that i must do it alone like always,


 
Good luck with it, and as I said tell us how it goes.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 6, 2010)

leon said:


> Good luck with it, and as I said tell us how it goes.


if i don't come back on for more than two days then my dad lit me on fire and i wasn't put out in time.... heh. leon i'll let you know when i do so that way you can transmit my will to those it may concern lol XD


----------



## Leon (Mar 7, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> if i don't come back on for more than two days then my dad lit me on fire and i wasn't put out in time.... heh. leon i'll let you know when i do so that way you can transmit my will to those it may concern lol XD


 
I want the valueables. :V


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 7, 2010)

leon said:


> I want the valueables. :V


maybe


----------



## Conri :3 (Mar 7, 2010)

This is a great thread to have it's good to see other furs providing support fur one another. Some people really need it, fortunatly my whole family knows ( and doesn't care) that I'm a gay furry...  >.> my elder sister laughed at me though...


----------



## Leon (Mar 7, 2010)

Conri :3 said:


> This is a great thread to have it's good to see other furs providing support _*fur*_ one another. Some people really need it, fortunatly my whole family knows ( and doesn't care) that I'm a gay furry... >.> my elder sister laughed at me though...


 
No.


----------



## Conri :3 (Mar 7, 2010)

leon said:


> No.


 *is confused* No what leon?


----------



## Leon (Mar 7, 2010)

Conri :3 said:


> *is confused* No what leon?


 
Don't use _fur_ instead of _for_.


----------



## SnowFox (Mar 7, 2010)

Conri :3 said:


> *is confused* No what leon?



Just ignore leon. He's a nasty hateful little fursecutor :V


----------



## Leon (Mar 7, 2010)

SnowFox said:


> Just ignore leon. He's a nasty hateful little fursecutor :V


 
No one asked you to voice the truth. :V


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 7, 2010)

leon said:


> No one asked you to voice the truth. :V


he's not nasty just a tad cynical no offense loen dear. but ya this is a good thread


----------



## Leon (Mar 7, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> he's not nasty just a tad cynical no offense loen dear. but ya this is a good thread


 
Quite alright honey, I acknowledge my own fualts. :3


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 7, 2010)

Conri :3 said:


> *is confused* No what leon?


yes well welcome


----------



## Draegonis7 (Mar 9, 2010)

Well I came out to my parents for real this morning, and just spent the day going through a shitstorm of stuff. I have ended up being kicked out of the house, disowned by my father, lost my car, lost my phone. I am currently staying at a friends house; his parents are very kind and are going to help me out so that I am not out on the street. I'm gonna work something out hopefully until the fall, when I can take out a student loan to help out if needed.

My dad reacted pretty terribly. He took my keys half an hour before I was to go to work, and when I asked how I was supposed to get to work now, he told me he didn't care. I ended up riding my bike there, and was able to work at least today, and was able to make arangement at least for this week for someone to cover for me. He also locked the house, and I was only able to retrieve my stuff with the help of my mother.

My mother says that I can call her if I get into any trouble, she doesn't accept it, and talked with me about how I should reconsider it, but she says she still loves me. I know she does, I just wish she was more understanding and that this didn't hurt her so much.

Despite everything, I am actually still pretty happy. Its easy to get over regretting what you have done, but its hard to get over the regret of what you didn't do.


----------



## Browder (Mar 9, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> Well I came out to my parents for real this morning, and just spent the day going through a shitstorm of stuff. I have ended up being kicked out of the house, disowned by my father, lost my car, lost my phone. I am currently staying at a friends house; his parents are very kind and are going to help me out so that I am not out on the street. I'm gonna work something out hopefully until the fall, when I can take out a student loan to help out if needed.
> 
> My dad reacted pretty terribly. He took my keys half an hour before I was to go to work, and when I asked how I was supposed to get to work now, he told me he didn't care. I ended up riding my bike there, and was able to work at least today, and was able to make arangement at least for this week for someone to cover for me. He also locked the house, and I was only able to retrieve my stuff with the help of my mother.
> 
> ...



Good luck man. I hope everything works out for you.


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Mar 9, 2010)

Jesus... "reconsider it"? What an ignorant thing to say and do. But you know what, I think you'll be happier without them, for real. I hope you get through the next few months without losing your sanity.


----------



## Aden (Mar 10, 2010)

"Hey mom and dad, I'm attracted to men instead of women sexually, which shouldn't be a big deal because it's just a small part of life, right?"

"HEY LET'S FUCK UP HIS LIFE"


----------



## Nylak (Mar 10, 2010)

SnowFox said:


> Just ignore leon. He's a nasty hateful little fursecutor :V


 
But he's an adorable little fursecutor.    *fluffs mane*


----------



## Draegonis7 (Mar 10, 2010)

What bothered me most during my argument with my mom is the fact that she basically told me that what I was doing was worse then sexually abusing a child. It completely blows my mind that anyone could even consider that to be true. 

Well, I'm going to go and talk to my professors today, see what I should do. I'd like to continue getting my education, but at this point with no car, and things messed up as they are, it might be a bit more difficult.


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 10, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> What bothered me most during my argument with my mom is the fact that she basically told me that what I was doing was worse then sexually abusing a child. It completely blows my mind that anyone could even consider that to be true.
> 
> Well, I'm going to go and talk to my professors today, see what I should do. I'd like to continue getting my education, but at this point with no car, and things messed up as they are, it might be a bit more difficult.


well dear i'm sure everything will work out i unfortunately still need my parental units i'm almost positive my mom knows about my sexuality but my dad would react exactly like yours car phone etc etc but the sad thing is i don't have a friend in the area that i can rely on. so i'm weakly stuck in this house hiding my self from them at every turn, but best of luck to you. i mean that,


----------



## Leon (Mar 10, 2010)

Nylak said:


> But he's an adorable little fursecutor.  *fluffs mane*


 
I try my hardest ma'am. :3


----------



## Takun (Mar 10, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> What bothered me most during my argument with my mom is the fact that she basically told me that what I was doing was worse then sexually abusing a child. It completely blows my mind that anyone could even consider that to be true.
> 
> Well, I'm going to go and talk to my professors today, see what I should do. I'd like to continue getting my education, but at this point with no car, and things messed up as they are, it might be a bit more difficult.



I hope things work out for you.  My mom eventually came around... a bit.  Not a whole lot, but it's not like it used to be.  My dad now pretends I never told him.


----------



## Hir (Mar 10, 2010)

Conri :3 said:


> This is a great thread to have it's good to see other furs providing support fur one another. Some people really need it, fortunatly my whole family knows ( and doesn't care) that I'm a gay furry...  >.> my elder sister laughed at me though...


Shut up, faggot.

@Nylak: Will you fluff my headfur? :3


----------



## Leon (Mar 10, 2010)

DarkNoctus said:


> Shut up, faggot.
> 
> @Nylak: Will you fluff my headfur? :3


 
No, my Nylak. >=C


----------



## Spawtsie Paws (Mar 11, 2010)

Im coming at as a human being...forgive me all!


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Mar 11, 2010)

HAXX said:


> Im coming at as a human being...forgive me all!


 
YOU'RE A HYOOMAN!?!?!!!one!!!????

GTFO!!!


----------



## Hir (Mar 11, 2010)

leon said:


> No, my Nylak. >=C


But but but Nylak is amazing! ;n;


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 11, 2010)

HAXX said:


> Im coming at as a human being...forgive me all!


good don't come out as a furry you're condemning your self if you do so.


----------



## Spawtsie Paws (Mar 11, 2010)

Yes, I am indeed a man. Bow before me glory!


 Now service me!


----------



## Leon (Mar 11, 2010)

DarkNoctus said:


> But but but Nylak is amazing! ;n;


 
And she's all mine. :3c


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 12, 2010)

HAXX said:


> Yes, I am indeed a man. Bow before me glory!
> 
> 
> Now service me!


oh stronger than you have tried,
good effort though


----------



## Spawtsie Paws (Mar 12, 2010)

Blue-Flame said:


> oh stronger than you have tried,
> good effort though



Thats not bowing, slave. That is mocking >:c

To the knees with you!


----------



## Leon (Mar 12, 2010)

HAXX said:


> Thats not bowing, slave. That is mocking >:c
> 
> To the knees with you!


 
No.


----------



## Spawtsie Paws (Mar 12, 2010)

leon said:


> No.



 why did my subjects rebel before I got to do anything?


----------



## Leon (Mar 12, 2010)

HAXX said:


> why did my subjects rebel before I got to do anything?


 
I am dom, it is YOU who will bow.


----------



## Draegonis7 (Mar 13, 2010)

Well, my parents have calmed down immensely, and I am back in my house, with my car back and everything. There still not very understanding, but they aren't being assholes about it either.


----------



## iBolt! (Mar 15, 2010)

xXWidowerXx said:


> Hello everybody. I danced around this topic before (the old one) saying I wasn't sure if I was.. y'know, gay.
> 
> Well, now I'm pretty damn sure I am. I still don't even want to write it, but I am. So, as a first step, I come out on this thread. lol...
> 
> I am awefully scared, and I know I would be rejected by my family. But I am in my senior year, and I won't come out to any of my friends... they'd probably hate me. At least at first, but most importantly, I know my best friend would. He's quite homophobe. So maybe I'll just come out once I'm in college, or something. Hell, this sucks. ):



Hon, I figured it would be horrible too! In 2008, _no one_ knew... I started coming out as gay in 2009, and every reaction I got was "that's ok with me" or "i wouldn't judge you". I did get one negative one; "go to church", but he actually asked me later on if I had blocked him and he told me that he's still my friend... either way, even the rednecks in this area have not judged me for who I am, and nobody has ever rejected me :3 I guess I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, cause trust me, this is *not* the life of an average gay person; this is ideal. Lesson learned: Nobody cares. Those that do are in a dying minority.

It'll be ok, sweetie *huggles*. It's perfectly normal to be scared. If you want to talk to someone, I'm always available  And I love being a cuddley crying shoulder for furiends ^w^


----------



## iBolt! (Mar 15, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> Well I came out to my parents for real this morning, and just spent the day going through a shitstorm of stuff. I have ended up being kicked out of the house, disowned by my father, lost my car, lost my phone. I am currently staying at a friends house; his parents are very kind and are going to help me out so that I am not out on the street. I'm gonna work something out hopefully until the fall, when I can take out a student loan to help out if needed.
> 
> My dad reacted pretty terribly. He took my keys half an hour before I was to go to work, and when I asked how I was supposed to get to work now, he told me he didn't care. I ended up riding my bike there, and was able to work at least today, and was able to make arangement at least for this week for someone to cover for me. He also locked the house, and I was only able to retrieve my stuff with the help of my mother.
> 
> ...



Wow man... I compliment you, that took guts. And I am glad things are getting better for you  I'm so sorry you had to go through that, though A parent is supposed to love unconditionally... I hate when it doesn't work like that... and what your mom said was HORRIBLE!


----------



## Rozel-Roo (Mar 16, 2010)

Draegonis7 said:


> Well, my parents have calmed down immensely, and I am back in my house, with my car back and everything. There still not very understanding, but they aren't being assholes about it either.


well at least your in your home again


----------



## Lukar (Mar 19, 2010)

I told another friend that I'm gay, and she seemed cool with it.


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Mar 20, 2010)

HAXX said:


> Im coming at as a human being...forgive me all!





HAXX said:


> Yes, I am indeed a man. Bow before me glory!
> 
> 
> Now service me!



There is that word again.  Hooo-man.  I thought they were fairy tales?

i heard that if they were real there mighty tasty as well. 
Maybe most got eaten and there almost extient?
(prob spelled that wrong)


----------



## Naloughs (Mar 20, 2010)

The Be-All-And-End-All of "outings" - the parents.

"You are confused"
"I'm not happy about this" (durrh!)
"The stupid mistakes you make in your life stick with you"
(and lastly, my PERSONAL favourite)
"If someone beats you up, and you're in the hospital, I won't drive you home"

but hey- i didn't get kicked out, right?


----------



## Lukar (Mar 20, 2010)

Naloughs said:


> The Be-All-And-End-All of "outings" - the parents.
> 
> "You are confused"
> "I'm not happy about this" (durrh!)
> ...



My mom told me that I needed to see a preacher and therapist. :V


----------



## Naloughs (Mar 20, 2010)

Jackalfox said:


> My mom told me that I needed to see a preacher and therapist. :V


 
:/ the suck.   But most medical proffesionals agree that homo-ness isn't a condition.   And you could try going to a unitarian preacher 

My mom figured that me making my own appts. for therapy was for the gayness.   She can believe what she wants >.>


----------



## Lukar (Mar 20, 2010)

Naloughs said:


> :/ the suck.   But most medical proffesionals agree that homo-ness isn't a condition.   And you could try going to a unitarian preacher
> 
> My mom figured that me making my own appts. for therapy was for the gayness.   She can believe what she wants >.>



Lol, well, I think my mom doesn't care much now. She said that back in July of last year, and hasn't said much about it since. =P

x.x' Wow.


----------



## Phil Ken Sebben (Mar 23, 2010)

Ha ha!   Dangly parts.


----------



## Aden (Mar 23, 2010)

Phil Ken Sebben said:


> Ha ha!   Dangly parts.



Oh hi I love you <3


----------



## Kehki (Apr 1, 2010)

lol my mom just looked at me XD 
and my dad doesn't talk about it, ever.
 It's not so bad. 
It's as if I never said anything...
 hope all you closet critters get out safely!
 I'm won't leave a man behind dammit lol


----------



## Lucy Bones (Apr 1, 2010)

My parents put it off as a "phase" and refuse to acknowledge me as homosexual. So, basically, whenever they have me meet people, they turn me into a completely different person. It's a good thing I can act.


----------



## Browder (Apr 1, 2010)

So many people in denial. My advice to you all is to keep on doing little 'gay' things until they start acknowledging it. Bring your boy/girlfriend home and make out on the couch in the family room.


----------



## TwilightV (Apr 1, 2010)

leon said:


> And she's all mine. :3c



Over my dead (impossible btw) body! D:<


----------



## Dog Donovan (Apr 1, 2010)

First thirteen years didn't really warrant a sexuality at all... For that matter, I was apathetic and hid myself beneath a mask.

Fourteenth year of my life I began to crack open a little, and as I did began to view people's relationships around me a little more. I figured out that at no point in time could I imagine myself getting together with a girl like all the guys were doing. It was the cool thing, so I felt pretty damn lame about it. Continued until the end of my eighth grade year.

My mum, the most incredible person in my life by far, died at the end of that year... My apathy became depression, my loneliness became a craving for people that would fill the hole left in my heart by her death...

Then I found the furry fandom through the Furry Forums of IMVU and met some excellent guys and gals that started to shape my mindsets for the better... I looked and learned and I found my sexuality popping up as I talked to a few of the more incredible guys. I was fortunately extremely perky at the time and took everything in smoothly and slowly.

And cue the unsurprising yiff RP with who would shortly become my best friend. And recently my boyfriend. Never felt more 'right' in my whole life, and I rolled along with it happily. Things just got better and better as I learned things about myself through this year, though it's also been hell in a lot of ways, because I didn't get the chance to come out to mum and dad just basically doesn't care one tad.

Came out to dad, though, earlier this year after a school seminar on gay children. It was interesting because he said he already guessed that and I was worrying too much. We get along scarcely better nowadays, but it's always a good thing not to be hated for it. I'm actually happy about the fact he doesn't care what I do, so long as I fulfill his expectations of my intelligence. So as a result, I make wise decisions and work hard to please him, and he fully supports whatever he might not support otherwise.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 1, 2010)

Well I was outed today via text message... most stressful 2 hours of my life, then I drank, and all was well... 


Well... until I get home tomorrow...


----------



## Browder (Apr 1, 2010)

Kuro Ryuichi said:


> Well I was outed today via text message... most stressful 2 hours of my life, then I drank, and all was well...
> 
> 
> Well... until I get home tomorrow...



Damn. I'll pray for you and good luck.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 1, 2010)

Browder said:


> Damn. I'll pray for you and good luck.


 
Yes, I hope Tom(myspace) burns in hell too...


----------



## Browder (Apr 1, 2010)

Kuro Ryuichi said:


> Yes, I hope Tom(myspace) burns in hell too...



Um, I usually don't pray for Hellfire.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 1, 2010)

Browder said:


> Um, I usually don't pray for Hellfire.


 
Always pray for Hellfire, it makes things SO much more fun... 

Sorry, I'm a bit of a pyro...


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 1, 2010)

Well, that went well... :V
 My mommy still loves me, she says she always will... :V
...but now I'm the LEAST respected person in this house. (not that I dropped that far)
 Fuckin' A 
 what a wonderful fuckin day,
 eh?


----------



## Browder (Apr 1, 2010)

Kuro Ryuichi said:


> Well, that went well... :V
> My mommy still loves me, she says she always will... :V
> ...but now I'm the LEAST respected person in this house. (not that I dropped that far)
> Fuckin' A
> ...



Hug?


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 1, 2010)

Browder said:


> Hug?


 
Who can turn down a hug *hug/backstab*
That was fun...


----------



## Taralack (Apr 1, 2010)

What are we coming out of? The depression?


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 1, 2010)

Toraneko said:


> What are we coming out of? The depression?


 
The Closet...


----------



## Browder (Apr 1, 2010)

Kuro Ryuichi said:


> Who can turn down a hug *hug/backstab*
> That was fun...



This means war. *Changes Avatar*
Step to this.


Toraneko said:


> What are we coming out of? The depression?


You'd think so, wouldn't you?


----------



## Lukar (Apr 2, 2010)

Just told my mom that I'm gay and have a boyfriend... That's all, though, because we'll have to talk about it more after my brother's baseball practice. I'm scared as fuck.


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 2, 2010)

Just wondering for a moment, what exactly is the impetus to come out to our parents at all? What _reason_ do people see to do that? This isn't a rhetorical question, I'm genuinely curious to know what everyone's individual reasons are for doing it (and because I probably will be doing it one day too).


----------



## Browder (Apr 2, 2010)

Jackalfox said:


> Just told my mom that I'm gay and have a boyfriend... That's all, though, because we'll have to talk about it more after my brother's baseball practice. I'm scared as fuck.



NEVER COME OUT WHILE YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND.

As a courtesy to the parents. The shock of 'gay' is enough. Boyfriend is to much.



Fuzzy Alien said:


> Just wondering for a moment, what exactly is the impetus to come out to our parents at all? What _reason_ do people see to do that? This isn't a rhetorical question, I'm genuinely curious to know what everyone's individual reasons are for doing it (and because I probably will be doing it one day too).



People don't like to lie to the people they love. Also admitting it to someone else makes it more comfortable for yourself.


----------



## Lukar (Apr 2, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Just wondering for a moment, what exactly is the impetus to come out to our parents at all? What _reason_ do people see to do that? This isn't a rhetorical question, I'm genuinely curious to know what everyone's individual reasons are for doing it (and because I probably will be doing it one day too).



She looked through my texts, so she sort of knew about my boyfriend before I told her. So, I sorta felt like I needed to tell her. And anyway, she already knew I was bi at one point.


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 5, 2010)

I recently came out to one of my friends. 

He doesn't believe that I'm Gay. He thinks it's just a "phase", and that "Hormones are just messing with my brain". 

Although I got quite a shock when he told me that at one point he was bi-curious. He tells me that if you keep thinking that your Gay that you will eventually become "permanently" Gay.

I personally think that he's Gay, and that he's repressing shit like I was months ago, he'll come to terms eventually. 

Although in the end, I'm kinda scared, like, the way I came out to him, it was just so awkward, the entire discussion was awkward. I hope this doesn't affect my friendship with him, because during the rest of the time I was over, everything was just so awkward. 

And, also, there's my fear of him telling somebody else, especially my other friend, who's very homophobic, and threatened to beat me if I was Gay.


----------



## Aden (Apr 5, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> friend





> threatened to beat me if I was Gay.



uhm
maybe you need better friends


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 5, 2010)

Aden said:


> uhm
> maybe you need better friends



Yeah, I know. 

I've got better friends who don't care about whether or not I'm Gay anyways. But they are really onto me, though, I've been hinting them a lot.


----------



## Atrak (Apr 5, 2010)

Hey, I'll actually be on-topic this time.

In the Off-Topic forum.

Awesome.

That makes me Off-Topic.

My sister saw me on here today.

She likes to gossip with my mother.

Even though they don't like each other.

Should be fun.


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 5, 2010)

atrakaj said:


> Hey, I'll actually be on-topic this time.
> 
> In the Off-Topic forum.
> 
> ...


hehe, oh shit?


----------



## Atrak (Apr 5, 2010)

CrispSkittlez said:


> hehe, oh shit?



Doesn't look like she told her.

Yet.

*shrug* She might not.

I'm cool with it either way.

Sometimes you just need the right circumstances to come out.

Most scenarios when I do it myself would probably tend to be rather awkward.


----------



## Leon (Apr 5, 2010)

atrakaj said:


> Hey, I'll actually be on-topic this time.
> 
> In the Off-Topic forum.
> 
> ...


 Sorry for my ignorance but, are you implying you are gay or some other sexuality that your friends and family don't know about?


----------



## Atrak (Apr 5, 2010)

leon said:


> Sorry for my ignorance but, are you implying you are gay or some other sexuality that your friends and family don't know about?



Furry.


----------



## Leon (Apr 5, 2010)

atrakaj said:


> Furry.


Ah. :V


----------



## Stawks (Apr 5, 2010)

Wait, how do people in your family even know what a furry is?

I thought we were underground.


----------



## Atrak (Apr 5, 2010)

Stawks said:


> Wait, how do people in your family even know what a furry is?
> 
> I thought we were underground.



They don't know that I'm one yet.

My sister could always come on here and see.

Also, my mother saw that 1000 Ways to Die episode.


----------



## Leon (Apr 5, 2010)

atrakaj said:


> They don't know that I'm one yet.
> 
> My sister could always come on here and see.
> 
> Also, my mother saw that 1000 Ways to Die episode.


Lol, I never got to see it. =/



I told my dad about  furries a few nights ago, (while inebriated..) and he was cool with it, thought it was strange, but none the less he's cool with it. Now just to tell my folks about my bisexuality...


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 5, 2010)

Hmm, I think I talked about myself on here...... a long fucking time ago. I don't remember what I said, so I'll do an abridged version.

Basically, I left a note for my mum explaining I was gay one morning before I went to school. When I came home a long discussion was held between her, my stepfather, and I. I don't remember how many times a heard some variation of, "Are you sure?" They may have said they were fine with it, I didn't get that impression at the time.

As for my friends, I chose to be rather specific with who I talked to about it, with the worst comment I received at the time being, "This is kinda weird, but don't worry, I'll get used to it."

That was all about a year ago.

Until recently, I had a boyfriend. It was when I got asked out I decided I felt secure telling my dad and sister, and changing around some things under my information page on facebook. Everything went over surprisingly well. My dad confided in me some things he'd be keeping from my sister and I for a long time. The few people that made some bad comments on my facebook page were nearly instantly threatened by my friends.

Personally, I consider the ordeal over, and I got off very lucky. My Aunt's told me if I ever need to I go over to her place to rant if I feel inclined, mom and my step-dad seem to have warmed up to it all by now, and even though I was recently dumped, I can't complain about where I'm at.


----------



## CaptainCool (Apr 5, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Although I got quite a shock when he told me that at one point he was bi-curious. He tells me that if you keep thinking that your Gay that you will eventually become "permanently" Gay.



your friend is either retarded or VERY afraid of being gay^^ i think it might be the second possibility 

@CrispSkittlez: yeah, you got off very lucky! good for you that it went so well^^


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 5, 2010)

CaptainCool said:


> your friend is either retarded or VERY afraid of being gay^^ i think it might be the second possibility



Yeah, he seems pretty afraid of becoming Gay if anything. He basically told me that if you repress it long enough, it'll go away. Trust me, repressing it does not make you straight, I've tried >.< 

He also told me that the only way your truly Gay is if you match the stereotype. Total bullshit.


----------



## CaptainCool (Apr 5, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah, he seems pretty afraid of becoming Gay if anything. He basically told me that if you repress it long enough, it'll go away. Trust me, repressing it does not make you straight, I've tried >.<
> 
> He also told me that the only way your truly Gay is if you match the stereotype. Total bullshit.



yeah, thats both total bullshite^^ repressing your feelings is never doing any good. and there are TONS of gay guys who dont match the typical stereotype. 
if they dont tell you you wouldnt even know it! XD
tell your friend that mathias appel from FAF thinks he is a total moron!


----------



## Kryn (Apr 6, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah, he seems pretty afraid of becoming Gay if anything. He basically told me that if you repress it long enough, it'll go away. Trust me, repressing it does not make you straight, I've tried >.<
> 
> He also told me that the only way your truly Gay is if you match the stereotype. Total bullshit.



Your friend is gay


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 6, 2010)

leon said:


> I told my dad about furries a few nights ago, (while inebriated..) and he was cool with it, thought it was strange, but none the less he's cool with it. Now just to tell my folks about my bisexuality...


 
Would he still be cool about it when sober?  Most ppl i know would be more open to someone being Bi or gay than a furry.

Most of my family would freak at either. Tho some wouldnt care.
 Then again those who would, are very religious:-|

I wish you well in what you decide.


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 6, 2010)

Kryn said:


> Your friend is gay



I know, he'll come to terms to his own sexuality eventually. I've went through the denial phase myself.


----------



## Leon (Apr 7, 2010)

Stargazer Bleu said:


> Would he still be cool about it when sober? Most ppl i know would be more open to someone being Bi or gay than a furry.
> 
> Most of my family would freak at either. Tho some wouldnt care.
> Then again those who would, are very religious:-|
> ...


I also talked about it recently when sober, and he's still fine with it, he's the kind of guy that makes fun of gays all day lol, and my mom thinks it's a "phase", but whatever, I'm me. :3


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 7, 2010)

leon said:


> I also talked about it recently when sober, and he's still fine with it, he's the kind of guy that makes fun of gays all day lol, and my mom thinks it's a "phase", but whatever, I'm me. :3



Thats not to bad then. At least there not against it.

I also belive just be who you are, instead of someone your not.

Getting my ears pierced tommorw, always refrained from it for years to keep the peace amongst family members, but im to the point if they dont like it they dont have to look.


----------



## Browder (Apr 7, 2010)

Stargazer Bleu said:


> Getting my ears pierced tommorw, always refrained from it for years to keep the peace amongst family members, but im to the point if they dont like it they dont have to look.



For someone coming from a very urban environment this is always hilarious to hear. Everyone and their uncle has pierced ears. I still can't believe people take it as a point of contention.


----------



## Leon (Apr 7, 2010)

Stargazer Bleu said:


> Thats not to bad then. At least there not against it.
> 
> I also belive just be who you are, instead of someone your not.
> .


I am me, and I can't be anything else. :3



Browder said:


> For someone coming from a very urban environment this is always hilarious to hear. Everyone and their uncle has pierced ears. I still can't believe people take it as a point of contention.


My parents let me get my ear pierced, but I want my tongue done, which my dad wont allow. =/


----------



## Willow (Apr 7, 2010)

leon said:


> I am me, and I can't be anything else. :3
> 
> My parents let me get my ear pierced, but I want my tongue done, which my dad wont allow. =/


If there are three piercing locations I can't stand, it's tongue, nipple, and eyebrows...


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 8, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> I know, he'll come to terms to his own sexuality eventually. I've went through the denial phase myself.



My denial phase was six years... >.>

...wait, was it five... no less than four...


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 8, 2010)

WillowWulf said:


> If there are three piercing locations I can't stand, it's tongue, nipple, and eyebrows...


I wanted a tongue piercing for my birthday, but mum said so so I'm getting an eyebrow piercing instead. >.>


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 8, 2010)

Kuro Ryuichi said:


> My denial phase was six years... >.>
> 
> ...wait, was it five... no less than four...



My denial phase lasted about 8-11 months.


----------



## whatthefur (Apr 8, 2010)

No one knows I'm gay, at all.
Well, actually, neither do I.
...Maybe i'll just go with "bi".

Actually, my mom might know. She's found my, uh, "toy", twice, but it's not an actually dildo so she might not have figured it out....on the other hand, ever since then she asks every single day if i've met any girls at school yet...*sigh*


----------



## entropicage (Apr 8, 2010)

My boyfriend pokes fun at me for going on here, cause I like talking to furries. My ex likes to shout "fursecute" but still mews quite often. Weirdness.


----------



## Leon (Apr 9, 2010)

WillowWulf said:


> If there are three piercing locations I can't stand, it's tongue, nipple, and eyebrows...


 I would never get my nipple or eybrow done, it's just to gay. :V


----------



## Bambi (Apr 9, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> My denial phase lasted about 8-11 months.


Not sure when everyone else had their denial phase, but mine started in the 4th or 5th grade.

Grew into full blown non-denial at around the 7th.


----------



## alicewater (Apr 10, 2010)

Yeah, I just came out as Bi wednsday to a room of two houndred College student's and my Ex-boyfriend, by kissing a girl in front of all of them.


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 10, 2010)

alicewater said:


> Yeah, I just came out as Bi wednsday to a room of two houndred College student's and my Ex-boyfriend, by kissing a girl in front of all of them.



Epic way to out yourself. :3


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 10, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Epic way to out yourself. :3



Agreed and adding mandatory "pics or it didn't happen".


----------



## Aden (Apr 10, 2010)

alicewater said:


> Yeah, I just came out as Bi wednsday to a room of two houndred College student's and my Ex-boyfriend, by kissing a girl in front of all of them.



That's called every college party ever


----------



## alicewater (Apr 10, 2010)

Aden said:


> That's called every college party ever


 
Actually this took place at a benifit to help raise money for the IOWA STATE UNIVERSITY, LGBTSS! 
It was a drag show and the girl I kissed was part in the show, she had me get up on stage and kissed me! 

I have pic's and video of the event but not of me getting kissed since I was the one operating the camera.


----------



## Browder (Apr 10, 2010)

alicewater said:


> Yeah, I just came out as Bi wednsday to a room of two houndred College student's and my Ex-boyfriend, by kissing a girl in front of all of them.



Congratulations! That was pretty amazing of you. The worst is over.


----------



## BroadSmak (Apr 13, 2010)

I have to come out sooner or later.
I know my folks are gonna be cool about it, my friends too.
I don't even know what I'm afraid of..


----------



## xcliber (Apr 13, 2010)

I came out to my mom. She was not ok with (being the Christian she is), but she was understanding that I don't have a choice and that I just like what I like.

Sadly, we also came to the conclusion that it doesn't matter that I'm gay if I never get a boyfriend anyway. I've never actually tried though, sooo....


----------



## BroadSmak (Apr 13, 2010)

xcliber said:


> I came out to my mom. She was not ok with (being  the Christian she is), but she was understanding that I don't have a  choice and that I just like what I like.
> 
> Sadly, we also came to the conclusion that it doesn't matter that I'm  gay if I never get a boyfriend anyway. I've never actually tried though,  sooo....



That's just mean.. She doesn't want you do get a boyfriend?


----------



## xcliber (Apr 13, 2010)

BroadSmak said:


> That's just mean.. She doesn't want you do get a boyfriend?


 She doesn't want me to be gay period. Something about being a sin and going to hell and shit.

She initially told me she wouldn't stop me but to still not to act on my feelings until my grandparents (Christian, conservative, homophobic, and slightly racist) died. Out of respect (and to let her calm down and think for a while), I said ok. I came back to her about a week later to tell her how unreasonable that was considering they are in their 70's and could easily live another 15 or 20 years yet, and that I'm not going to wait until I'm 40 to get a boyfriend just for their sake.

She agreed that she was out of line and that she will not stop me if I found someone I like, but instead will pray that I find Jesus and let him guide away from sin.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 13, 2010)

xcliber said:


> She doesn't want me to be gay period. Something about being a sin and going to hell and shit.
> 
> She initially told me she wouldn't stop me but to still not to act on my feelings until my grandparents (Christian, conservative, homophobic, and slightly racist) died. Out of respect (and to let her calm down and think for a while), I said ok. I came back to her about a week later to tell her how unreasonable that was considering they are in their 70's and could easily live another 15 or 20 years yet, and that I'm not going to wait until I'm 40 to get a boyfriend just for their sake.
> 
> She agreed that she was out of line and that she will not stop me if I found someone I like, but instead will pray that I find Jesus and let him guide away from sin.



1. Get boyfriend
2. Fuck in Living Room
3. ???
4. PROFIT!!!


----------



## Browder (Apr 13, 2010)

xcliber said:


> She doesn't want me to be gay period. Something about being a sin and going to hell and shit.
> 
> She initially told me she wouldn't stop me but to still not to act on my feelings until my grandparents (Christian, conservative, homophobic, and slightly racist) died. Out of respect (and to let her calm down and think for a while), I said ok. I came back to her about a week later to tell her how unreasonable that was considering they are in their 70's and could easily live another 15 or 20 years yet, and that I'm not going to wait until I'm 40 to get a boyfriend just for their sake.
> 
> She agreed that she was out of line and that she will not stop me if I found someone I like, but instead will pray that I find Jesus and let him guide away from sin.



Move to Philadelphia.


----------



## CinnamonApples (Apr 13, 2010)

xcliber said:


> I came out to my mom. She was not ok with (being the Christian she is), but she was understanding that I don't have a choice and that I just like what I like.



I hope you realize not every Christian is out to get teh gayz.
Seriously, some of us aren't ignorant as people think. :V


----------



## xcliber (Apr 13, 2010)

CinnamonApples said:


> I hope you realize not every Christian is out to get teh gayz.
> Seriously, some of us aren't ignorant as people think. :V


I know. But most *are *against homosexuality in general. My mom is too, but she also understands that homosexuality is not a choice and I made it clear how much I struggled with it and tried to force myself to be straight but that I can't help being who I am.


----------



## Takun (Apr 13, 2010)

alicewater said:


> Actually this took place at a benifit to help raise money for the IOWA STATE UNIVERSITY, LGBTSS!
> It was a drag show and the girl I kissed was part in the show, she had me get up on stage and kissed me!
> 
> I have pic's and video of the event but not of me getting kissed since I was the one operating the camera.




I went to ISU last year.


----------



## bloobyrd18 (Apr 14, 2010)

xcliber said:


> I know. But most *are *against homosexuality in general. My mom is too, but she also understands that homosexuality is not a choice and I made it clear how much I struggled with it and tried to force myself to be straight but that I can't help being who I am.


That's how you do it.

Told my moms about my being gay and she took it somewhat well. Oh my god he is such a cutey


----------



## shark whisperer (Apr 14, 2010)

CinnamonApples said:


> I hope you realize not every Christian is out to get teh gayz.
> Seriously, some of us aren't ignorant as people think. :V



i am christian, everyone is allowed to know, since im proud of it.
you must handle your beiing gay the same way, if you feel gay, be proud of it, since you are unique (everyone is unique on this planet)

and it is hard to come out as a gay, since people think you are ill or sick.

BUT REMEMBER YOU KNOW BETTER
i always say:
its most important what *God and you* think about yourself.(i believe god is love, so he loves everybody)
what others think is not important.:wink:

just be yourself and let nobody stand in your way beiing yourself


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 14, 2010)

BroadSmak said:


> I have to come out sooner or later.
> I know my folks are gonna be cool about it, my friends too.
> I don't even know what I'm afraid of..


 


xcliber said:


> I came out to my mom. She was not ok with (being the Christian she is), but she was understanding that I don't have a choice and that I just like what I like.
> 
> Sadly, we also came to the conclusion that it doesn't matter that I'm gay if I never get a boyfriend anyway. I've never actually tried though, sooo....


 
My dad and mom were divorced since i was like 2. Neither of them cared that i was Bi.
My dad is just like what makes me happy.
I never actualy told my mom(lived with my dad, seen my mom some but not a whole lot) but she seemed to know. She always told me i shouldnt be ashamed of who and how i am. 

 Most other family tho, like aunts, uncles, cousions. Most dont know at all. I know there horribly against it. One even said if there child said they werent straight. They would disown them.
Most my family are christian, and i have some beliefs in it as well. So i know how that can go with all the speaches.


----------



## xcliber (Apr 14, 2010)

bloobyrd18 said:


> Oh my god he is such a cutey


 Who me?


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 15, 2010)

xcliber said:


> Who me?


 
Dont know if he ment youor not(tho probaly did) Cause i also think your a cutey:grin:
*gives big dragon hug*


----------



## xcliber (Apr 15, 2010)

Stargazer Bleu said:


> Dont know if he ment youor not(tho probaly did) Cause i also think your a cutey:grin:
> *gives big dragon hug*


 *ack
CaN't bReaTHE!
*enjoys hug anyway


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 16, 2010)

xcliber said:


> *ack
> CaN't bReaTHE!
> *enjoys hug anyway


 
I maybe a dragon but i always hug gently


----------



## Leon (Apr 16, 2010)

I have thought about coming out alot lately, but, I have no balls. :3


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 16, 2010)

I've decided to come out to my parents by emailing them a photo of me hugging a guy whenever I manage to find a boyfriend. Epic way to do it?


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 16, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> I've decided to come out to my parents by emailing them a photo of me hugging a guy whenever I manage to find a boyfriend. Epic way to do it?


 
I really love this idea Guess it might be easier that telling in person.
Would they take it better this way or if you told them?


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 16, 2010)

Stargazer Bleu said:


> I really love this idea Guess it might be easier that telling in person.
> Would they take it better this way or if you told them?



Well, making it "easy" isn't really a concern, because I don't see it as something that needs to be "broken" to them easily. To be all dramatic about it by figuratively sitting them down would be hypocritical on my part since I don't believe homosexuals should be treated differently just because of who they are. Sometimes I do think gays should put the truth about themselves right out there without any rhetoric; I strongly believe that homosexual couples should not be afraid to display affection publicly because that is the only way that society can change. If a photograph incites a negative reaction then perhaps the parent will eventually recognize that as a shortcoming in themselves and amend it, and they will if they genuinely love their child.

*steps off soapbox*


----------



## Leon (Apr 16, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> I've decided to come out to my parents by emailing them a photo of me hugging a guy whenever I manage to find a boyfriend. Epic way to do it?


 I'd say make it a kiss or something, my parents wouldn't even flinch if they saw me hugging another guy, but swappin spit? They'd get the idea.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 16, 2010)

leon said:


> I'd say make it a kiss or something, my parents wouldn't even flinch if they saw me hugging another guy, but swappin spit? They'd get the idea.


I don't get it. What would swapping spit imply? :V


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 16, 2010)

Bloodshot_Eyes said:


> I don't get it. What would swapping spit imply? :V



That "We're here and we're queer! Get used to it"? XD


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 16, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> That "We're here and we're queer! Get used to it"? XD


I'm like, half gay. Does that count?


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 16, 2010)

Bloodshot_Eyes said:


> I'm like, half gay. Does that count?



Sure. Anything that defies dominant social norms regarding gender roles and behavior can be considered "queer."


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 16, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Sure. Anything that defies dominant social norms regarding gender roles and behavior can be considered "queer."


Yay, I'm fuckin' the system!!! 
*throws Molotov*


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 16, 2010)

Bloodshot_Eyes said:


> Yay, I'm fuckin' the system!!!
> *throws Molotov*



Fight the powah!


----------



## Miumaru (Apr 18, 2010)

full-on-zombie said:


> I never hid it. I was one of those people that was "born gay"...falling into stereotypes such as playing with dinosaurs instead of Barbies, trying on daddy's clothes instead of mommy's, watching Alien instead of chick flicks (me having a female body).
> 
> What bothered me is that people don't view being gay/bi/pan as normal, so they feel they have to "come out". Straight people don't have to hide being straight, so why should gay people have to hide being gay?
> 
> ...


Thats how I feel about it. Once coming out as gay (or anything else) is not a big deal anymore will we know society has accepted us. And the opposite type TG as me too. Funny. 

Apparently my family suspected, but never said anything to me. Im out to most of my family, but not my brother or step-dad yet. Kinda annoys me they never confronted me though. If they had, though by force I may have been out years earlier, and that would mean transitioning would well...have happened by now. I'd atleast have a larger wardrobe of clothes I actually enjoy wearing. (Its limited atm due to lack of money, figures Im out when we become poor)


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 18, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Well, making it "easy" isn't really a concern, because I don't see it as something that needs to be "broken" to them easily. To be all dramatic about it by figuratively sitting them down would be hypocritical on my part since I don't believe homosexuals should be treated differently just because of who they are. Sometimes I do think gays should put the truth about themselves right out there without any rhetoric; I strongly believe that homosexual couples should not be afraid to display affection publicly because that is the only way that society can change. If a photograph incites a negative reaction then perhaps the parent will eventually recognize that as a shortcoming in themselves and amend it, and they will if they genuinely love their child.
> 
> *steps off soapbox*


 
A part of it is most people are not used to seeing it.  If homosexual couples started being less shy in public it might be possible to be more accepted in time. 

The more people are used to seeing things the less they pay attention to them. Of course it would take time, just have to step up and take action. Now only if most of us could start doing this, even if only in small steps.


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 18, 2010)

Stargazer Bleu said:


> A part of it is most people are not used to seeing it.  If homosexual couples started being less shy in public it might be possible to be more accepted in time.
> 
> The more people are used to seeing things the less they pay attention to them. Of course it would take time, just have to step up and take action. Now only if most of us could start doing this, even if only in small steps.



This. This a million times.


----------



## Spawtsie Paws (Apr 23, 2010)

Why should we have to know about your sex life or your personal decisions?

I hate people when they flaunt any relationship.


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (Apr 23, 2010)

HAXX said:


> Why should we have to know about your sex life or your personal decisions?
> 
> I hate people when they flaunt any relationship.



Coming out isn't flaunting.


----------



## BroadSmak (Apr 23, 2010)

I'm thinking it might be easier to not "come out" at all, just start being bisexual without telling anyone.. sort of, know what I mean?
Like.. get a boyfriend and change the relationship status..
Then just tell people it should've been obvious if they ask.

Yeah.
Nice.


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 23, 2010)

BroadSmak said:


> I'm thinking it might be easier to not "come out" at all, just start being bisexual without telling anyone.. sort of, know what I mean?
> Like.. get a boyfriend and change the relationship status..
> Then just tell people it should've been obvious if they ask.
> 
> ...



Wow, that's actually a pretty cool idea.


----------



## Tao (Apr 23, 2010)

I'm thinking about telling my parents that I'm bi. My dad wouldn't care that much, he's really nice, but my mother... She wouldn't get angry, but she'd try to "embrace" the gay part by buying me short shorts, pink clothes, etc. 

She terrifies me.


----------



## Kanin (Apr 23, 2010)

Faris said:


> I'm thinking about telling my parents that I'm bi. My dad wouldn't care that much, he's really nice, but my mother... She wouldn't get angry, but she'd try to "embrace" the gay part by buying me short shorts, pink clothes, etc.
> 
> She terrifies me.



Lol. XD


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 23, 2010)

Faris said:


> I'm thinking about telling my parents that I'm bi. My dad wouldn't care that much, he's really nice, but my mother... She wouldn't get angry, but she'd try to "embrace" the gay part by buying me short shorts, pink clothes, etc.
> 
> She terrifies me.



What. 

I remember you saying earlier that you were straight


----------



## Browder (Apr 23, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> What.
> 
> I remember you saying earlier that you were straight



Furry forum, remember?


----------



## Tao (Apr 23, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> What.
> 
> I remember you saying earlier that you were straight



This forum is growing on me like a fungus. But no really, I meant that I'm not a flamboyant gay.


----------



## BroadSmak (Apr 24, 2010)

Faris said:


> I'm thinking about telling my parents that I'm bi. My dad wouldn't care that much, he's really nice, but my mother... She wouldn't get angry, but she'd try to "embrace" the gay part by buying me short shorts, pink clothes, etc.
> 
> She terrifies me.



I think my mom would do that too.. I think she always wanted a daughter, which is probably why she is turning one of my brothers into a girl, sort of.
He's out picking flowers with his doll.


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Apr 25, 2010)

Faris said:


> I'm thinking about telling my parents that I'm bi. My dad wouldn't care that much, he's really nice, but my mother... She wouldn't get angry, but she'd try to "embrace" the gay part by buying me short shorts, pink clothes, etc.
> 
> She terrifies me.


 
I know my mom would of done this too if she knew i was Bi.
One of my half brothers was gay. She did stuff like this for him, but he was fully gay and not just bi tho.
Kind of scarry when have a parrent like this.


My dad dosent care either wayas long as im happy.

Most relitives on the other hand....


----------



## Fenrir Lupus (Apr 25, 2010)

Isn't there a sticky in the den that completely rails on "coming out" because you can't come out as having a hobby?  I like that thread more.


----------



## yummynbeefy (Apr 25, 2010)

wow i must be like the luckiest kid in the world if i told my parents that i was bi or gay they wouldnt care they both already know im furry and they were like "oh well thats cool its your life you can do what you want with it" they are soooo supportive of me


----------



## Takun (Apr 25, 2010)

Fenrir Lupus said:


> Isn't there a sticky in the den that completely rails on "coming out" because you can't come out as having a hobby?  I like that thread more.



Coming out as gay /= Coming out as furry.

You'd know this if you read the topic.


----------



## Leon (Apr 25, 2010)

Takun said:


> Coming out as gay /= Coming out as furry.
> 
> You'd know this if you read the topic.


I smell smoke, becuase someone just got burned. :3


----------



## xcliber (Apr 25, 2010)

I just found out the other day that my step-mom has a very open-minded view of homosexuals. We were talking the other day and the subject of the recent events in that Missouri (or Mississippi, i forget which) school incident came up. As it turns out, her son-in-law's sister is lesbian and has a female lover and have their own child. Her whole family is very accepting of homos.

I didn't tell her that I was, but I know I won't get any grief from her when I do. I need to find a way to ask her now, if my dad has the same opinion on the subject. But I don't know how to do this without her reading between the lines and hinting at the fact that I'm gay.


----------



## BroadSmak (May 2, 2010)

xcliber said:


> I didn't tell her that I was, but I know I won't get any grief from her when I do. I need to find a way to ask her now, if my dad has the same opinion on the subject. But I don't know how to do this without her reading between the lines and hinting at the fact that I'm gay.



What does that matter?
Talk to her about it, and ask if your dad feels the same way as her, or ask her to ask him about it.
She seems like the kind of person who can keep a secret.


----------



## xcliber (May 2, 2010)

BroadSmak said:


> What does that matter?
> Talk to her about it, and ask if your dad feels the same way as her, or ask her to ask him about it.
> She seems like the kind of person who can keep a secret.


I was actually beginning to think the same.


----------



## BroadSmak (May 4, 2010)

xcliber said:


> I was actually beginning to think the same.


You should do it.
I know I would if I had someone I knew was completely ok with it.
Unfortunately, I live in sweden, so..


----------



## Tao (May 4, 2010)

I recently told my friends that I have a boyfriend and they're totally okay with it. Well, the ones I told. I haven't told my parents since I trust my friends more than them.


----------



## Lazyboots (May 4, 2010)

I'm not exactly sure what I would come out to. I don't find males/females sexually attractive, I only hook up with people that I connect with on a... hell not "a" MANY personal levels... but, I kinda wish everyone knew what I was like.... it's just I also realize the problems it would bring. Granted, there's SOME people who know about me, buuuuut... I'm talking family. I'm not embarrassed of what I do... it just, like with the drug thing my family was hurt when they found out even though they were fine. So it would be the same "Why couldn't he just tell me?" PLUS the "Why IS he doing this?" questions... AGAIN.


----------



## kijonaia (May 7, 2010)

Hello. Sorry if I'm not supposed to post here or something. I only just joined these forums. x__x Anyway... I'm not quite sure what I am. I only just recently heard of the term 'pansexual'. What, exactly, is it? I like guys and girls, but mostly guys. I have a boyfriend, too. I'm just not quite sure what I am. o3o;;


----------



## Browder (May 7, 2010)

Sexuality is a fluid thing. Just do whatever feels comfortable and don't worry about labeling yourself.


----------



## Aden (May 7, 2010)

Browder said:


> Sexuality is a fluid thing.



Quite. Lots of fluids to keep track of, that's for sure.


----------



## alicewater (May 8, 2010)

kijonaia said:


> Hello. Sorry if I'm not supposed to post here or something. I only just joined these forums. x__x Anyway... I'm not quite sure what I am. I only just recently heard of the term 'pansexual'. What, exactly, is it? I like guys and girls, but mostly guys. I have a boyfriend, too. I'm just not quite sure what I am. o3o;;


 
Just say bi, with a prefrence for men. It's all good.


----------



## Vintage (May 8, 2010)

contrary to some people's belief that i should be telling anyone and everyone lest i seem somehow _ashamed_ of my sexuality i have decided to be discreet and thus only talk about it when the subject comes up in casual conversation.

that, and i live in the bible belt.



Aden said:


> Quite. Lots of fluids to keep track of, that's for sure.



dayyyyum


----------



## BroadSmak (May 9, 2010)

I actually told a bunch of people yesterday, at a party..
It was way easier to do it drunk, it just sort of slipped out.


----------



## xcliber (May 9, 2010)

I told my best friend the other day by accident. I was IMing him and another guy at the same time. I was RPing with the other guy. The subject of having multiple chat windows open at the same time came up, at which point I told him that I was furry RPing with someone. It was actually my first RP so I was telling him about it and how some of the stuff furries say during RP is really weird.

I copy/pasta'd something from the RP window to show him, but forgot to edit "He" to say "She" (the RP convo was being spoken from 3rd person). So I quickly do a '*She' and sent it before realizing that the entire Copy/pasta also said "him" and "his" multiple times. So of course he was suspicious, especially since there should be no need to "*correct" copy/pasted text. DX

I don't really remember what was said after that, but he was cool with it. I think he may have suspected it to begin with though.


----------



## Jonnaius (May 10, 2010)

Basically, my mam has kinda found out through hacking - yes, she actually hacked something, despite being unable to work a DVD player - my facebook. Since then she's made my life a living hell. I've gone back to how I was at 12 - completely hating myself for who I am. Which is stupid. I can't help it. But a word of advice to everyone - be careful who you trust. Everyone at school doesnt mind, but family hate me for it. Weird way around, I know, but hey, thats Newcastle for you. I hope this doesnt put people off coming out, just make sure you have plans for every eventuality if it does go wrong. And good luck to anyone doing it. I still need the courage to tell the rest of the family.


----------



## Kurama (May 14, 2010)

Wow, this thread is still going? Amazing.

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago, I finally decided to muster up the courage to tell my mom I was gay. Now, she didn't believe me at first, but she finally came around, and honestly... I wasn't surprised by her reaction. I'm glad she's not a homophobe and such, cause I got the old "I'll love you no matter who you are" thing, but still, makes me feel good that my mom accepts me. ^_^


----------



## Hateful Bitch (May 14, 2010)

I came out to my parents maybe a year ago come this June. So it's been a while, and I don't know if they even believe me. If they don't, then oh well.


Still haven't come out at school. Not like I'm acting over it or denying it. It's just that nobody asks. People say I look gay, so I laugh. They don't ask if I am gay, so I don't have to tell them. I guess that is kind of acting over it, but oh well. I'm not lying, but I'm not really telling the truth either. I see no issue.

What I'm worried about most, however, is how my best friend will react when and if I decide to come out while still in school, which I don't really plan to right now. He and I make fun of a load of shit. The Chinese, the Jewish, gay people, whatever. He doesn't really believe that the Chinese all eat dog or that the Jewish are all scummy little money grabbers, but I can't really tell if he's being serious with some things he says. He might dislike gays, he might not. But he doesn't mind the fact that I'm the only person he walks to lunch with, and who he shares classes with. We have it set up for out final year of school so we're in 3 of the same classes. So if he does hate gays, and I come out, then this next year is going to be pretty shitty. I'll have to spend more than half my time table with him, and if he ditched me, I'd have to find someone new to go to lunch with, and pretty much rearrange my habits I've built for the past two years for lunch and break.

So he's pretty much my one reason I might not come out while at school.

I've got plenty of worries, although they're pretty much all stupid ones, but this is probably my most pressing right now. Luckily, I don't think about it much. I just go on with how I usually play things out.

So yeah.
That's my contribution to the thread.


----------



## Jashwa (May 14, 2010)

So I got back from college on Wednesday and my mom totally unpacked my clothes (I was still unloading stuff from the truck) and found a shirt from my school's Allies program that says "CMU Allies: Graduating queers for 100 years". She said a couple little things about it, but didn't ask why I had it or if I was gay/bi/anything, so I don't know if she thinks it's a joke or not. 

I'm expecting an awkward conversation here soon.


----------



## greg-the-fox (May 15, 2010)

BroadSmak said:


> I actually told a bunch of people yesterday, at a party..
> It was way easier to do it drunk, it just sort of slipped out.



I always hope I can come out this way, but I'm still too tongue tied no matter how drunk I am :/


----------



## Darkwing (May 15, 2010)

Teto said:


> Still haven't come out at school. Not like I'm acting over it or denying it. It's just that nobody asks. People say I look gay, so I laugh. They don't ask if I am gay, so I don't have to tell them. I guess that is kind of acting over it, but oh well. I'm not lying, but I'm not really telling the truth either. I see no issue.
> 
> What I'm worried about most, however, is how my best friend will react when and if I decide to come out while still in school, which I don't really plan to right now. He and I make fun of a load of shit. The Chinese, the Jewish, gay people, whatever. He doesn't really believe that the Chinese all eat dog or that the Jewish are all scummy little money grabbers, but I can't really tell if he's being serious with some things he says. He might dislike gays, he might not. But he doesn't mind the fact that I'm the only person he walks to lunch with, and who he shares classes with. We have it set up for out final year of school so we're in 3 of the same classes. So if he does hate gays, and I come out, then this next year is going to be pretty shitty. I'll have to spend more than half my time table with him, and if he ditched me, I'd have to find someone new to go to lunch with, and pretty much rearrange my habits I've built for the past two years for lunch and break.
> 
> ...



Idk what to say about this, a lot of people in my school suspect me of being Gay, and so far I can say it's pretty terrible. 

A lot of people in my school strongly hate Gays, some of them openly talk about committing hate crimes against Gays, if there was ever one in the school. 

Yesterday, while I was sitting on the bus someone asked me if I was Gay, as usual, I didn't really say anything in response, they assumed I was Gay, and the guy brought up an entire mob, almost everybody in the bus surrounded me, pounding me with insults like "You fag", "Go burn in Hell", "Your a mistake, you should've never been born", I just ignored them, but that only made things worse, they got closer to me, began throwing things at me, threw a few threats in there and threw out more insults until the end of the bus ride. I almost got into a fight with one or two of the guys in the mob. And no, this wasn't the first day this happened, but this was the worst of it. 

But things aren't always so bad, a lot of girls in the school like me, and they hang around me a lot, so I guess I got some people of my own. 

However, there is one openly Gay kid in the school, just like me he hangs around the girls a lot, however, whenever he passes by I hear people whispering nasty things to each other like, "I swear I'll kill that fag", etc. 

I know Gay-straight alliances are pretty much pick-up clubs for Gays, but when there is full-scale hate like this going on, I believe one should be necessary.


----------



## Tao (May 15, 2010)

I told my mother and she took it pretty well and informed me that one of my good friends was gay as well. 

When I took a trip to Europe, everyone knew I was gay most likely. I had a ton of beer in Amsterdam, passed out and woke up with my face in someone's lap in a pair of new tight jeans on the plane from Amsterdam to London.


----------



## SnowFox (May 15, 2010)

Jashwa said:


> So I got back from college on Wednesday and my mom totally unpacked my clothes (I was still unloading stuff from the truck) and found a shirt from my school's Allies program that says "CMU Allies: Graduating queers for 100 years". She said a couple little things about it, but didn't ask why I had it or if I was gay/bi/anything, so I don't know if she thinks it's a joke or not.
> 
> I'm expecting an awkward conversation here soon.



Are you going to lie your way out of it?


----------



## Jashwa (May 15, 2010)

SnowFox said:


> Are you going to lie your way out of it?


I could've easily, but I promised myself I wouldn't lie about it. They won't kick me out or anything, but I'm not sure if they'll be cool with it.


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (May 17, 2010)

Just had a little nerve-wracking conversation with my mom.

Mom: "I know there's something you want to tell me, so just say it."

Me: [long pause] "... I'm gay, alright."

Mom: "Yeah, I know."

:|


----------



## Darkwing (May 17, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Just had a little nerve-wracking conversation with my mom.
> 
> Mom: "I know there's something you want to tell me, so just say it."
> 
> ...



Lol, she's talking as if she knew about it. 

Did she look through your computer or something? xD


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (May 17, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Lol, she's talking as if she knew about it.
> 
> Did she look through your computer or something? xD



I live on my own. She said she's always known about me.

Weird. And creepy. :\ But she did the whole "I'll love you no matter what" thing. Bless her. <3 My dad probably wouldn't be the same way.


----------



## Darkwing (May 17, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> I live on my own. She said she's always known about me.
> 
> Weird. And creepy. :\ But she did the whole "I'll love you no matter what" thing. Bless her. <3



I know it's weird, but sometimes, moms just know, y'know, they have that sixth sense. 

I have a feeling that my mom and maybe my dad knows about my sexuality as well, because they've always been telling me that they love me no matter what, even if I am Gay. Putting a lot of emphasis on the Gay part.

I know it would be a good thing for me to come out to my parents, but not until I get a boyfriend, it just doesn't feel right to come out to your parents and not have a boyfriend.


----------



## Citrakayah (May 17, 2010)

Not going to tell my parents anytime soon. They wouldn't support me joining the military if they knew.


----------



## Fuzzy Alien (May 17, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> I have a feeling that my mom and maybe my dad knows about my sexuality as well, because they've always been telling me that they love me no matter what, even if I am Gay. Putting a lot of emphasis on the Gay part.



Yup, they know.


----------



## Darkwing (May 17, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Yup, they know.



So I've thought. 

But yeah, I wonder how they find out 0_0


----------



## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 17, 2010)

I have a huge problem, i mean big, since i was a kid ive been raised in a church setting, every day since i could understand words and went to sunday school ive had it drilled into my head that even being bi was a crime to god and i would die, burn in hell and suffer for all eternity, but once i hit about 12 or 13 i started to be attracted to both guys and girls, the girls were fine with it but my friendships never lasted cause they saw me as soft, and that i liked to hang out with them too much. I know im not gay cause i still like women maybe thats the church talking i dont know anymore, and im starting to get sick of it its just especially since moving to Cali i have found myself in the same situation with guys and girls, i would've told more people about it sooner but the god dam sermons every sunday have drilled into my head and told me no!
my parents support me financially and they hate homosexuality more then any other people ino, so my whole life ive only had girlfriends and trust me theres no way in hell i could come out and say im bi before i move out or id be on the street before i could finish the sentence, all funding shut off, school work and job gone and im not goin to risk my life yet
example: i have problems openly kissing girls, but theres a drive sometimes that i could really do it to one of my guy friends, friends in high school even thought i was gay until the day they ditched me, i guess the only reason my parents dont know yet is that they couldnt fathom me being bi or gay


----------



## Kanin (May 17, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Just had a little nerve-wracking conversation with my mom.
> 
> Mom: "I know there's something you want to tell me, so just say it."
> 
> ...



That's exactly what I thought would happen. XD


----------



## Milo (May 18, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Just had a little nerve-wracking conversation with my mom.
> 
> Mom: "I know there's something you want to tell me, so just say it."
> 
> ...



I wonder how much different it would be, to tell your parents you're bisexual lol... would it be like "I am half disappoint"?

anyway, mah daddy kicked me out when I told him I was gay, and mah mommy did the typical christian bullshit, but later found that I wasn't a monster BECAUSE of it :V



Darkwing said:


> So I've thought.
> 
> But yeah, I wonder how they find out 0_0



when you shake their hands.... I swear... something about the way I shake hands, everyone I meet goes and asks their friend "is that guy gay?"


----------



## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 18, 2010)

Milo said:


> I wonder how much different it would be, to tell your parents you're bisexual lol... would it be like "I am half disappoint"?


I don't know what my parents would say or do and frankly that's why I'm scared as hell, but i promised myself i'd tell them when i can fully take care of myself, which is hopefully soon. Until then i've done a pretty good job at hiding it hopefully i can hold out a little longer


----------



## blackfuredfox (May 18, 2010)

Milo said:


> when you shake their hands.... I swear... something about the way I shake hands, everyone I meet goes and asks their friend "is that guy gay?"



do you just grab thier hand, or do you grip it as hard as possible?


----------



## Milo (May 18, 2010)

<CaliforniaStripes> said:


> I don't know what my parents would say or do and frankly that's why I'm scared as hell, but i promised myself i'd tell them when i can fully take care of myself, which is hopefully soon. Until then i've done a pretty good job at hiding it hopefully i can hold out a little longer



honestly, I don't think you NEED to come out to your parents if you're bisexual... I mean, if they say "I want grandchildren" it's not like you can't provide :|

or even if someone asks if you're gay, you could just say "I like women" and avoid the subject altogether :V



blackfuredfox said:


> do you just grab thier hand, or do you grip  it as hard as possible?



I don't get why you HAVE to crush their hands... what, to prove you're a manly dude?


----------



## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 18, 2010)

Milo said:


> honestly, I don't think you NEED to come out to your parents if you're bisexual... I mean, if they say "I want grandchildren" it's not like you can't provide :|
> 
> or even if someone asks if you're gay, you could just say "I like women" and avoid the subject altogether :V


good point, thx for the advice


----------



## blackfuredfox (May 18, 2010)

Milo said:


> honestly, I don't think you NEED to come out to your parents if you're bisexual... I mean, if they say "I want grandchildren" it's not like you can't provide :|
> 
> or even if someone asks if you're gay, you could just say "I like women" and avoid the subject altogether :V
> 
> ...



not crush, but have a firm handshake, though i have a stronger handshake than any officer in ROTC and im the only gay one in there.


----------



## Milo (May 18, 2010)

<CaliforniaStripes> said:


> good point, thx for the advice



besides, half the time you wonder if it's even worth coming out to certain people, let alone important. 

for your own sanity, eventually you'll want people to know who you are, but otherwise, if you like living in a cardboard box, then go right ahead xD

(I kid about the homeless thing )



blackfuredfox said:


> not crush, but have a firm handshake,  though i have a stronger handshake than any officer in ROTC and im the  only gay one in there.



it's stupid... as if everything ELSE didn't mean "you either do it this way, or you're gay"... |:C


----------



## blackfuredfox (May 18, 2010)

Milo said:


> besides, half the time you wonder if it's even worth coming out to certain people, let alone important.
> 
> for your own sanity, eventually you'll want people to know who you are, but otherwise, if you like living in a cardboard box, then go right ahead xD
> 
> ...



i blend in perfectly as a straight guy at my school. hell only one of my friends know im gay and i had to convince them of that.


----------



## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 18, 2010)

years of practice and careful planning  it's worked so far


----------



## blackfuredfox (May 18, 2010)

<CaliforniaStripes> said:


> years of practice and careful planning  it's worked so far



i just realized, guys who have been in the closet for most of thier life would make the best spies.


----------



## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 18, 2010)

blackfuredfox said:


> i just realized, guys who have been in the closet for most of thier life would make the best spies.


Haha masters of deception and espionage, i could go for that spin


----------



## Darkwing (May 18, 2010)

Milo said:


> when you shake their hands.... I swear... something about the way I shake hands, everyone I meet goes and asks their friend "is that guy gay?"



Like Blackfox said, you probably don't give them a firm handshake. You pussy :V 

I don't give the firmest handshakes, but it's firm enough for me to be considered "straight".


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## Jazzy (May 19, 2010)

> I don't get why you HAVE to crush their hands... what, to prove you're a  manly dude?



More or less.

Being gentle from what I've gleamed isn't really a trait average heterosexual men consider "masculine", I feel like If you give a gentle handshake, to them that is feminine, so "of course" the person who shook hands must be gay. :X

There is a lot of macho bullshit in the heterosexual world that I'm glad I don't have to experience..


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## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 19, 2010)

Jazzy said:


> More or less.
> 
> Being gentle from what I've gleamed isn't really a trait average heterosexual men consider "masculine", I feel like If you give a gentle handshake, to them that is feminine, so "of course" the person who shook hands must be gay. :X
> 
> There is a lot of macho bullshit in the heterosexual world that I'm glad I don't have to experience..


meh im ok with my weak handshake its worked so far


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## SushiFox (May 19, 2010)

Im jealous of people whose parents actually believe them. I told my parents that I am bisexual, and they do not believe me. I have told them like 20 times XD and they still do not believe me!!!


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## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 19, 2010)

nah they're just in denial, truthfully my parents would probably just laugh but im not risking it


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## SushiFox (May 19, 2010)

my parets are christians.....and so am i...yet they sat there and tried to tell me i am not XD.


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## SushiFox (May 19, 2010)

btw my main character that i rp with hun...is that species yet male
i have a female and male version ^^


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## <CaliforniaStripes> (May 19, 2010)

SushiFox said:


> my parets are christians.....and so am i...yet they sat there and tried to tell me i am not XD.


that your not christian or your not bi? I still go to church but it's more of a cover and i hate participating in all the things my folks want me too, i got really close to breaking my cover when i started flirting with a guy my age in the college class, i caught myself thankfully, but really its just a cover now



SushiFox said:


> btw my main character that i rp with hun...is that species yet male
> i have a female and male version ^^


closest i've gone to doin that is using female characters in all the games i play, I like my sex just the way it is thank you very much


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## Leon (May 31, 2010)

Still haven't come out, things have been kind of tense between me and my dad so, I don't want to cuase a bigger rift between us, and my mom I'm still not worried about.


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## Pliio8 (May 31, 2010)

I wish to come out, but it gets difficult. I have ALOT of supportive friends, but my only true hurdle is my own Family. My two eldest brothers and my Mother are homophobic, or lest they don't understand, they all think its a choice. This gets ironic though because it seems to be the reverse of the average situation. My Mother is agnostic, and my two eldest brother's are both atheist, and I'm the most religious person in my family. The only family member that may support me is my highly religious grandmother, and my liberal Christian cousin. The only two friends that I see not supporting me are in fact, atheist.

Do I want to come out? YES. I've wanted it for years, but its getting difficult to even try. I've come out to two friends and they haven't changed one bit, and I think most know that I'm gay. However this doesn't change the fact that I want to be open and out. =/


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## Fuzzy Alien (May 31, 2010)

Pliio8 said:


> I wish to come out, but it gets difficult. I have ALOT of supportive friends, but my only true hurdle is my own Family. My two eldest brothers and my Mother are homophobic, or lest they don't understand, they all think its a choice. This gets ironic though because it seems to be the reverse of the average situation. My Mother is agnostic, and my two eldest brother's are both atheist, and I'm the most religious person in my family. The only family member that may support me is my highly religious grandmother, and my liberal Christian cousin. The only two friends that I see not supporting me are in fact, atheist.
> 
> Do I want to come out? YES. I've wanted it for years, but its getting difficult to even try. I've come out to two friends and they haven't changed one bit, and I think most know that I'm gay. However this doesn't change the fact that I want to be open and out. =/



Maybe drop hints that you're gay... or something. How old are you?


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## Pliio8 (May 31, 2010)

Fuzzy Alien said:


> Maybe drop hints that you're gay... or something. How old are you?



I'm 17. And I think the fact that all my backgrounds on my computer and 360 are of shirtless Lombaxes they'd get the damn picture, but they don't.


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## Zontar (Jun 2, 2010)

Here's something I've considered. I'm bisexual...naturally, I get to dick around in the closet for as long as I don't actually go out with guys. But that would be denying part of my sexuality...unless I like found the chick of my dreams right this year and committed.

But I'm only nineteen; I dunno how many relationships I'm gonna have yet. Am I gonna go out with another guy? If he's awesome enough (and gay of course), then yeah!

But, how ethical you think it is to stay in the closet as a bisexual who, in essence, _has_ that option? Especially when gays don't have this option of staying in the closet. Do you think it's the "right thing" for me to come out, since I rather unfairly have the "best of both worlds"? What's the gays' take on this "half-straight privilege"?


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## Fuzzy Alien (Jun 2, 2010)

Zontar said:


> Here's something I've considered. I'm bisexual...naturally, I get to dick around in the closet for as long as I don't actually go out with guys. But that would be denying part of my sexuality...unless I like found the chick of my dreams right this year and committed.
> 
> But I'm only nineteen; I dunno how many relationships I'm gonna have yet. Am I gonna go out with another guy? If he's awesome enough (and gay of course), then yeah!
> 
> But, how ethical you think it is to stay in the closet as a bisexual who, in essence, _has_ that option? Especially when gays don't have this option of staying in the closet. Do you think it's the "right thing" for me to come out, since I rather unfairly have the "best of both worlds"? What's the gays' take on this "half-straight privilege"?



I don't think anybody should feel afraid to be with someone they really want to be with. I strongly disagree with people who believe bisexuality isn't something you need to come out about.


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## studyfrench (Jun 11, 2010)

I'm not really certain of my sexual orientation.  I might be bi and I might be gay, but I don't really know.  I think one of the hardest parts about coming out for me is the fact that I am not yet fully comfortable or certain of myself yet.  I was more comfortable when I was in high school and I knew other gay guys.  It is also pretty hard because I graduated from high school a year ago, and I haven't really had any gay friends since.  I just finished my first year at a college that is in somewhat rather rural conservative area.  This only made things worse and I am definitely not going back to the same place.
      I have a couple friends who I have told I'm bi.  I also came out to my mom thinking she would be supportive, but she wasn't.  She was very mean to me about it and tried to make me feel ashamed.  I was able to convince her that I was just uncertain and that I might not like guys, but in reality I definitely do.


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## Bloodshot_Eyes (Jun 11, 2010)

Last night, (or was it the night before) me and my cousin Jenny were playing a drinking game and talking. After that we're chilling in the living room with her mom (my aunt) and Jenny bursts out "CODY HAS A SIGNIFICANT OTHER!!!" I'm just sitting there like... "Okay..." Her mom asked "What's her name?" and being drunker than hell, Jenny screams out "IT'S THOMAS!!!" Then my aunt asks "He's a boy?" I say "yeah, then she says "cool"... cool!
 She was completely fine with it. I really wish my mom would've had the same reaction... My mom's a bitch... >_> 
 So yeah, there's a funny closet story.


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## Jashwa (Jun 11, 2010)

It's a good thing that turned out fine, or you would've had to slap a ho


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## Bloodshot_Eyes (Jun 12, 2010)

I couldn't get out of my seat let alone "slap a ho". xD


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## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Jun 13, 2010)

Bloodshot_Eyes said:


> Last night, (or was it the night before) me and my cousin Jenny were playing a drinking game and talking. After that we're chilling in the living room with her mom (my aunt) and Jenny bursts out "CODY HAS A SIGNIFICANT OTHER!!!" I'm just sitting there like... "Okay..." Her mom asked "What's her name?" and being drunker than hell, Jenny screams out "IT'S THOMAS!!!" Then my aunt asks "He's a boy?" I say "yeah, then she says "cool"... cool!
> She was completely fine with it. I really wish my mom would've had the same reaction... My mom's a bitch... >_>
> So yeah, there's a funny closet story.



Probably the most honest coming-out story ever. So glad this wasn't another rehash story of someone else's story. Example: "I came out to my loving, then adoring parents who I always go along with. When I came out to them they tried to beat the gay out of me, and then they sent me to HetroCamp, where they beat gay out of me even more." I would be more inclined to believe that if it wasn't used so often by "new gays."


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## Jashwa (Jun 13, 2010)

Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs said:


> Probably the most honest coming-out story ever.


 Or tied with the other 99% of coming out stories that are completely honest, at least.


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## Point_Blank (Jun 14, 2010)

I've been having a hell of a time trying to figure out how I'm gonna come out to the rest of my family, what with my uber homophobe dad, Christian mom, and gay-taunting sisters.
I've considered just straight-out announcing it at dinner, or dropping subtle hints, but the way things would turn out either way would be a shitstorm. Eventually though, once I get back to schooling proper, they're going to notice the lack of girls and catch on. I can't decide between waiting until they get the picture or just tell them. I could also smuggle a fursuit home, die some shit rainbows, and let everyone know of me being a gay furry by walking into the room dressed as a rainbow wolf.
Although that'd get a bunch more shit than normal.


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## Lukar (Jun 14, 2010)

I'm, for all intents and purposes, out of the closet in real life. Freedom is good. :3


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## Yithian (Jun 14, 2010)

1


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## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Jun 14, 2010)

I know. I know. I just felt like picking on those people.


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## BroadSmak (Jun 15, 2010)

I'm in an awesome position, moved to the other side of the world, so I don't have to come out!
FUCK YEAH!


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## Slyck (Jun 15, 2010)

I'm probably never gonna come out even if I'm asked as to my orientation.

My father might donate the ACLU once in awhile and my mother might be a member of Greenpeace (Yea I know, not necessarily a rights organization but good luck finding a homophobic member.) but there's still this goddamn hick town. I just heard yesterday that Baskin Robins supported gay rights. Cool, I though. A _company_ doing something _good_. Who would have thunk it?

Then came the fifty or so pledges that nobody in the room would ever buy ice cream there ever again.

Shit. Well, this ain't good. The people I hang out with would probably be cool, and they may have their speculations all the same but when you're friends with -- okay, not friends, really, polar opposites of that 80% majority crowd composed of true-blue conservative Christians things can get ugly really fucking fast.

So much for freedom.


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## Tao (Jun 15, 2010)

I came out to a couple of my friends yesterday as I wore one of my more femboy outfits to the movies with them. (Short shorts, blue shirt and an orange bandanna.)


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## Trance (Jun 17, 2010)

> Originally posted by *Point Blank*
> 
> I could smuggle a fursuit home, dye some shit rainbows, and let everyone know of me being a gay furry by walking into the room dressed as a rainbow wolf.  Although that'd get a bunch more shit than normal.



That would be epic.


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## Ammonsa (Jun 18, 2010)

I came out last year and everyone hated me for it and shit. So I moved schools and now I've started fresh. I haven't come out, because I'm afraid the same thing will happen. I don't know what to do.


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## Browder (Jun 18, 2010)

Ammonsa said:


> I came out last year and everyone hated me for it and shit. So I moved schools and now I've started fresh. I haven't come out, because I'm afraid the same thing will happen. I don't know what to do.


 
Come out again and stand up for your right to be yourself. It's not easy and you'll feel like crap but you'll be furthering a cause. 

Only do it if you're completely comfortable with the decision though.


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## Hateful Bitch (Jun 18, 2010)

But you've told some friends, haven't you Ammonsa?

ALSO WHAT IS THE GREAT SECRET PUZZLE I HAVEN'T SOLVED / FOUND OUT WHAT IT IS YET
I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN, BECAUSE IT'S FREAKING ME OUT D:


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## Ammonsa (Jun 18, 2010)

Yeah, I've told some of my friends, but it's not public.


And Teto, you need to guess.


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## Hateful Bitch (Jun 18, 2010)

Ammonsa said:


> And Teto, you need to guess.


 No shut up you suck tell me what it is >:/


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## Ammonsa (Jun 18, 2010)

It's not even a big deal. Gosh. Min knows and Saha pretty much guessed. So why can't you?


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## xcliber (Jun 18, 2010)

Almost came out to my step-mom the other day. The subject of homos came up at dinner, and again, she voiced her very clear, very accepting opinion of homosexuality. It came up during a conversation about my little brother and his girlfriend the vacation they are going on together when the subject switched to public displays of affection. My dad's only comment was "I'm trying to eat my dinner here, thank you." I still don't know where he stands on the issue yet, but I was completely ready to tell my step-mom and ask her if she knew what my dad's view is on the matter.

I was totally calm, and even had a good line ready to start the conversation: "Hey [step-mom's name], about our conversation at dinner, I know _you're_ very accepting of gays and lesbians and whatnot, but I was wondering if you knew what Dad's opinion is on it." And of course, if she asked why I was asking, I would tell her the truth and to not tell dad until I knew what he thinks. And I trust her to be able to keep things like this private between us.

The only problem was that I couldn't get a moment alone with her without my dad overhearing, and I wanted it to be a casual conversation so I didn't want to go up to her and say, "Hey, can I talk to you in private for a moment?".

Oh well, I'll get another chance sometime.


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## Hateful Bitch (Jun 18, 2010)

Ammonsa said:


> It's not even a big deal. Gosh. Min knows and Saha pretty much guessed. So why can't you?


 Because I clearly missed whatever made it obvious :I


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## Ammonsa (Jun 18, 2010)

That sucks, xcliber.


Also, Teto. Saha figured it out on the top of his head. I told Min.  But the thing is that even though I even said song lyrics aimed at you and you replied back you still didn't figure it out.
http://forums.furaffinity.net/member.php?23451-xcliber


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## Hateful Bitch (Jun 18, 2010)

Okay I'm going to badger you about it some more on MSN because this thread is almost too suited for this conversation.


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## Pliio8 (Jun 18, 2010)

After two and a half years I came out last week.

I basically just put "I love you Edward <3" on Facebook, and changed my status to wanting to be dating men. Very few people got it though, but those that have are very accepting thus far. :3 I was sick of lying, so I just said "Screw it" and I came out.


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## Enwon (Jun 18, 2010)

Pliio8 said:


> After two and a half years I came out last week.
> 
> I basically just put "I love you Edward <3" on Facebook, and changed my status to wanting to be dating men. Very few people got it though, but those that have are very accepting thus far. :3 I was sick of lying, so I just said "Screw it" and I came out.





> I basically just put "I love you Edward <3" on Facebook, and changed  my status to wanting to be dating men. Very few people got it though,  but





> I basically just put "I love you Edward <3" on  Facebook, and





> "I love you Edward <3"



Pliio8, what...
Edward... REALLY?!!!
WHAT?!!!
YOU MEAN FROM TWILIGHT?!!!!!!
TWILIGHT?!!!!!!


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## Pliio8 (Jun 18, 2010)

N106 said:


> Pliio8, what...
> Edward... REALLY?!!!
> WHAT?!!!
> YOU MEAN FROM TWILIGHT?!!!!!!
> TWILIGHT?!!!!!!


 
JESUS SHITTY TIT FUCKS CHRIST NO

Edward Peralta, a real dude...

If I wanted to do a fictional character, I would have put "I love you *Ratchet*" //Herpa Derp derp Dip Der


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## Disasterfox (Jun 18, 2010)

nvm who the heck is edward peralta lol


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## Pliio8 (Jun 18, 2010)

Disasterfox said:


> nvm who the heck is edward peralta lol


 
Does it matter? No, not really, thats how I just came out by professing to everyone that I love him. =/


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## Browder (Jun 18, 2010)

Congratulations Plilo!  Does Edward love you back?


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## Disasterfox (Jun 18, 2010)

<:'( I was curious


I googled name and saw a baby? lol


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## Pliio8 (Jun 18, 2010)

Browder said:


> Congratulations Plilo!  Does Edward love you back?


 
Yes. x3
But we're separated by a large period of land. I'm an America, he's in Argentina.


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## Browder (Jun 18, 2010)

Pliio8 said:


> Yes. x3
> But we're separated by a large period of land. I'm an America, he's in Argentina.


 
Heh, Long distance lolationships.  Doesn't matter though, congrats again!


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## Enwon (Jun 18, 2010)

> JESUS SHITTY TIT FUCKS CHRIST NO
> 
> Edward Peralta, a real dude...


 Oh good.  Not Edward the sparkly gay vampire.  Edward of Argentina.  Good.  You had me worried for a sec there, Pliio8.


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## Pliio8 (Jun 18, 2010)

Browder said:


> Heh, Long distance lolationships.  Congrats again dude!


 
I'm not going to get in an LDR, I've had too much experience with them. Its just an odd circumstance. :/


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## Hateful Bitch (Jun 19, 2010)

I've had my Facebook status set to men for ages and nobody has noticed c:


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## Hir (Jun 22, 2010)

I came out to my best friends today. They were all fine with it. Somehow they were shocked even though I'm like the most effeminate person alive but yeah. c:


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## Willow (Jun 22, 2010)

I kinda came out to my closest friend about the fact that I might not be entirely gay, she was fine with it, but will still refer to me as her gay friend


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## greg-the-fox (Jun 22, 2010)

Teto said:


> I've had my Facebook status set to men for ages and nobody has noticed c:


 
I did this and NOBODY either noticed or cared... it was actually kind of disappointing... and then I kept getting gay ads so I don't have any "interested in" set now (because who checks that anyway?)


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## TheRandomGuy (Jun 24, 2010)

I've been reading this thread (and the previous one) for a couple of days now, and now I'm tempted to come out to my family as bisexual.
Really, I'm not sure why I haven't yet.
I know my parents will still accept me (well, I know my mom will at least. She already sort of questioned me about it when I checked out a book about a gay teenager from the library) and I'm already sure of what I am.

The only homophobic person in my family is my little sister, and she doesn't have to know, at least not yet.
The only problem I've found is not being able to find a good time to say it.
But even if I do find an opportune time...it's just so much easier to just stay in the closet.
If I do that, then the big, awkward confrontation and subsequent reactions can be avoided.

Yet, I still feel like coming out.
I don't _have_ to, but I want to. So I can get this big weight off my chest and continue living life as I know it.
The guilt is starting to affect me. For example, in every song I listen to, I relate it to my current situation and then the thought fills my mind.
Any suggestions on how to deal with this problem? Thanks.


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## CinnamonApples (Jun 24, 2010)

I was pretty nonchalant about coming out. I just interjected it into the conversation like it everyone already knew. My parents asked me to clarify, I did, and we went on our merry way. However, I think my situation is the exception, not the rule. But it seems that the less of a deal you make it, the less of a deal they make of it. *shrugs*


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## TheRandomGuy (Jun 24, 2010)

Alright, I've come up with my tactic.
I've written a letter (three pages!) to my mom, and when she leaves for work, I'll leave it on the kitchen table.
It's pretty much coming out without doing it face to face.
Wish me luck. I'll post how it all goes after it happens (probably late afternoon/early evening).


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## Darkwing (Jun 24, 2010)

TheRandomGuy said:


> Alright, I've come up with my tactic.
> I've written a letter (three pages!) to my mom, and when she leaves for work, I'll leave it on the kitchen table.
> It's pretty much coming out without doing it face to face.
> Wish me luck. I'll post how it all goes after it happens (probably late afternoon/early evening).


 
Three pages? Holy shit, how can you write 3 pages about coming out? 

Anyways, good luck.


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## TheRandomGuy (Jun 24, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Three pages? Holy shit, how can you write 3 pages about coming out?
> 
> Anyways, good luck.


 
I wrote it double spaced for some reason, so that's why.
It's been an hour since she got home, and she hasn't noticed the letter yet.
I can tell she didn't read it 'cause she left her purse on it.
Note to self: Need to make my letter more visible.


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## SnowFox (Jun 24, 2010)

TheRandomGuy said:


> I wrote it double spaced for some reason, so that's why.
> It's been an hour since she got home, and she hasn't noticed the letter yet.
> I can tell she didn't read it 'cause she left her purse on it.
> Note to self: Need to make my letter more visible.


 
Draw rainbows all over it.


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## TheRandomGuy (Jun 24, 2010)

Just checked the table again and the letter wasn't there.
So that means either of these conclusions:
1. She actually read the letter
2. She threw it away, not knowing what was written in there.

I'd like to think that the case was the former, but you never know.


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## TheRandomGuy (Jun 24, 2010)

Well, after wondering where the letter had gone, she just came into my room and handed me her own little letter.
She didn't say anything but she looked kind of sad. 
I'm too scared to open it.
Oh well, at least I finally came out.


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## Pliio8 (Jun 24, 2010)

TheRandomGuy said:


> Well, after wondering where the letter had gone, she just came into my room and handed me her own little letter.
> She didn't say anything but she looked kind of sad.
> I'm too scared to open it.
> Oh well, at least I finally came out.


 
Calm yourself and read it, there may be no reason to be afraid.


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## TheRandomGuy (Jun 24, 2010)

Pliio8 said:


> Calm yourself and read it, there may be no reason to be afraid.


 
I just finished reading it, and you were right.
She was really accepting and said that she was fine as long as I was happy.
I feel so much better now...though I do feel this strange feeling in my stomach.
That's just the excitement of the moment, I guess.


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## Pliio8 (Jun 24, 2010)

TheRandomGuy said:


> I just finished reading it, and you were right.
> She was really accepting and said that she was fine as long as I was happy.
> I feel so much better now...though I do feel this strange feeling in my stomach.
> That's just the excitement of the moment, I guess.


 
This is good to be accepted. Why don't you go to her and give you a hug? She is your Mother after all.


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## Fuzzy Alien (Jun 24, 2010)

TheRandomGuy said:


> I just finished reading it, and you were right.
> She was really accepting and said that she was fine as long as I was happy.
> I feel so much better now...though I do feel this strange feeling in my stomach.
> That's just the excitement of the moment, I guess.



I wonder why she needed a letter to say that to y-- 

...ohhhhhh I see, she was trying to call attention to the fact that you didn't need to write her a letter in the first place. That she would've been fine just hearing it straight from your lips. :3


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## Tabasco (Jun 24, 2010)

Yeah. I tried to come out to my mom once. Started getting a talk about how it's just a phase and she went through it, too.


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## Tao (Jun 24, 2010)

Blues said:


> Yeah. I tried to come out to my mom once. Started getting a talk about how it's just a phase and she went through it, too.


 
That's terrifying


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## Atrak (Jun 24, 2010)

Blues said:


> Yeah. I tried to come out to my mom once. Started getting a talk about how it's just a phase and she went through it, too.


 
She was a furry? Hahaha. She should choose her words more carefully.


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## WeArePossessed (Jul 5, 2010)

If I could find a guy that I loved, Id come out to me parents...

But unfortunatly, poor me cannot seem to do so =(


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## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Jul 8, 2010)

TheRandomGuy said:


> I just finished reading it, and you were right.
> She was really accepting and said that she was fine as long as I was happy.
> I feel so much better now...though I do feel this strange feeling in my stomach.
> That's just the excitement of the moment, I guess.



It's probably anxiety, and your mind thinking if you made the right decision. You'll see soon enough. Personally, I think you should have waited until you were on your own.



Blues said:


> Yeah. I tried to come out to my mom once. Started  getting a talk about how it's just a phase and she went through it,  too.


 
hehehe Oh it's just some phase. They always think it's some passing phase that you'll grow out of, like you're going to snap out of it or something. Denial is a hell of a thing. 

Although, "bi" girls in my high school went through the bi phase. Man, did they piss me off because of that. It's like, "shut up! No you're not!"


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## Aondeug (Jul 10, 2010)

I am almost completely out of the closet. Most everyone I know knows that gender and sex aren't barriers to me. My grandparents still haven't been told though I feel my grandmother is on to me. She is very fond of asking if I am a lesbian. My closet. It is transparent methinks.


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## Shiroka (Jul 12, 2010)

I haven't come out of the closet yet because I unfortunately have no  real reason to do so (single), unless my mom finds my stack of gay porn,  but let's not hope for the worst. I only roll my eyes whenever she asks  if I have a girlfriend yet.

Though I think using humor could maybe help it to sink in easier. For  example; what's the difference between broccoli and a penis? I don't  like to eat broccoli. *badum-psh!*



Blues said:


> Yeah. I tried to come out to my mom once. Started getting a talk about how it's just a phase and she went through it, too.


 
How long are those phases supposed to last? Mine's been lasting since at least 2003.


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## Hakawne (Jul 12, 2010)

Shiroka said:


> Though I think using humor could maybe help it to sink in easier. For  example; what's the difference between broccoli and a penis? I don't  like to eat broccoli. *badum-psh!*


 
This is how I first told my sister I was gay:

We were having a joking conversation about how the number of American flags you have is direction proportional to how patriotic you are. I told her she was pretty patriotic for having all of those tiny little 4th of July flags stuffed away somewhere.
Her: "Damn straight!"
Me: "Speaking of which... I'm not."

She found it incredibly amusing. She didn't have a problem with it, though.


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## Commiecomrade (Jul 12, 2010)

I'm a straightfag, but I asked my mom (who is a religious republican who believes in miracles, etc.), "What if I was gay?" She kinda took it seriously and said "meh." I wish she could be the mom of some of these guys whose parents disown them for finding dick more appealing. Is it really all that important? It's just a part of who you are.


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## greg-the-fox (Jul 13, 2010)

Aondeug said:


> I am almost completely out of the closet. Most everyone I know knows that gender and sex aren't barriers to me. My grandparents still haven't been told though I feel my grandmother is on to me. She is very fond of asking if I am a lesbian. My closet. It is transparent methinks.


 
She's a lesbian!


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 13, 2010)

WeArePossessed said:


> If I could find a guy that I loved, Id come out to me parents...
> 
> But unfortunatly, poor me cannot seem to do so =(


 
I'm sorry to hear so, well I'm presently with someone I love, but if anything if you want someone to talk to about it. I know what you've been through.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 13, 2010)

Hey I'm 19 and at my university the last gay guy that came out... well... he transferred over to massey... in tears. I'm not taking art which is what he was in I'm in mechanical engineering and astrophysics... people in my classes seem ok, so do the druggies I hang out with but I really don't know and I won't be able to find a better university for my subjects so I might be forced back into drugs... a place that took a lot of strength to get out of.
People have said to me, after rumours about a certain carlos, that I should just come out if I'm gay and It'll be much easier. I'm not sure if they are tricking me or joking but I really don't want to end up like conrad... What should I do... How should I leave the closet.
Please PM me, thanks.


----------



## Shiroka (Jul 13, 2010)

coward67 said:


> Hey I'm 19 and at my university the last gay guy that came out... well... he transferred over to massey... in tears. I'm not taking art which is what he was in I'm in mechanical engineering and astrophysics... people in my classes seem ok, so do the druggies I hang out with but I really don't know and I won't be able to find a better university for my subjects so I might be forced back into drugs... a place that took a lot of strength to get out of.
> People have said to me, after rumours about a certain carlos, that I should just come out if I'm gay and It'll be much easier. I'm not sure if they are tricking me or joking but I really don't want to end up like conrad... What should I do... How should I leave the closet.
> Please PM me, thanks.


 
Just keep acting straight, pretending you are and wait until you're done with school to finally get out of the closet. If you're stuck with homophobic jocks, you'd better not put oil on the flames.


----------



## greg-the-fox (Jul 13, 2010)

Shiroka said:


> Just keep acting straight, pretending you are and wait until you're done with school to finally get out of the closet. If you're stuck with homophobic jocks, you'd better not put oil on the flames.


 
This, it's only a few years, you can get through it.


----------



## Xaerun (Jul 13, 2010)

I usually just get really drunk and yell it at people, and I'm surprised this hasn't received official recognition and its own book. "With A Little Help From My Friends, Mr. Vodka and Mr. Rum."
It's a working title.


But uh... yeah. Haven't told my family yet- since I'm still at home, and I have little brothers, I'd imagine it wouldn't go down so well.


----------



## Browder (Jul 13, 2010)

Xaerun said:


> I usually just get really drunk and yell it at people, and I'm surprised this hasn't received official recognition and its own book. "With A Little Help From My Friends, Mr. Vodka and Mr. Rum."
> It's a working title.
> 
> 
> But uh... yeah. Haven't told my family yet- since I'm still at home, and I have little brothers, I'd imagine it wouldn't go down so well.


 I'm not sure what the cultural standards are like for that in Australia. How bad would it be?


----------



## SnowFox (Jul 13, 2010)

Browder said:


> I'm not sure what the cultural standards are like for that in Australia. How bad would it be?


 
I didn't want to say anything to worry him, but I don't think the skirt and frilly apron is doing a very good job of hiding the gayness from his family.


----------



## Xaerun (Jul 14, 2010)

Browder said:


> I'm not sure what the cultural standards are like for that in Australia. How bad would it be?


 It's not really a cultural thing so much as a 'my family' thing. M'dad's German, my mum's a conservative Baptist. Most parts of Australia [that I've experienced] are... "okay" with it- they don't accept it, but they politely cough and look at their shoes kind of thing, you know?



SnowFox said:


> I didn't want to say anything to worry him, but I don't think the skirt and frilly apron is doing a very good job of hiding the gayness from his family.


 That is religious garb* and you are offending me sir

*of the religion dedicated to the unconditional worship of Lord Xaerun, King of FAF


----------



## Browder (Jul 14, 2010)

I just read the OP of the first version of this thread, by Takun.

Wow.

That's got to be the most useful thing wriiten. I feel like the next time the thread recycles that should be in the OP instead of just linking to it. If you haven't read it yet, here.


Xaerun said:


> That is religious garb* and you are offending me sir
> 
> *of the religion dedicated to the unconditional worship of Lady Xaerun, Queen of FAF


 
Thanks for teaching me about Australia. Also, fix'd :3.


----------



## Xaerun (Jul 15, 2010)

Browder said:


> I just read the OP of the first version of this thread, by Takun.
> 
> Wow.
> 
> ...



Browder why you gotta hate


----------



## Jashwa (Jul 15, 2010)

To be fair, you are Queen of FAF. 

Whitenoise is King.


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 15, 2010)

Australia is smexy! Well it's a bit more dangerous in the bush as I've heard...

But it's gay friendly, has lovely people and I wouldn't mind seeing some of the sites before WW3 destroys them.


----------



## Xaerun (Jul 15, 2010)

Jashwa said:


> To be fair, you are Queen of FAF.
> 
> Whitenoise is King.


We'll see about that.

VAGINA used Crunch!
It's super effective!


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Jul 15, 2010)

Xaerun said:


> We'll see about that.
> 
> VAGINA used Crunch!
> It's super effective!


 BLOODSHOT_EYES used SAND ATTACK! :V


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 15, 2010)

SAND ATTACK is SUPER EFFECTIVE!

VAGINA is clogged with sand!


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Xaerun said:


> I usually just get really drunk and yell it at people, and I'm surprised this hasn't received official recognition and its own book. "With A Little Help From My Friends, Mr. Vodka and Mr. Rum."
> It's a working title.
> 
> 
> But uh... yeah. Haven't told my family yet- since I'm still at home, and I have little brothers, I'd imagine it wouldn't go down so well.


 
LOL!!! Dunno why but that bad me lol the fuck all over the place!


----------



## Willow (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I have been a foul furry for 8 years. It has only gotten progressively worse over the years just as my hatred has for what I have become. It's god's cruel joke on me, he heartily laughs at my sexual attraction to bipedal animals, it doesn't even matter if it's male or female for goodness sake. I can't stand the fact that I actively search for furry porn every 1-3 days. It's even more humiliating that I would actually far prefer seeing myself as an anthro rather than representing myself with my true appearance.
> I can't truthfully claim to have any dignity because of this godforsaken fandom. It is disgusting and just plain weird to lust over a bipedal animal. I would otherwise feel like a truly remarkable individual if it weren't for this plague.
> 
> Well now that I got that off of my chest, I feel as if I have a solid chance for recovery.
> ...


 Nice troll dude


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I have been a foul furry for for 8 years. It has only gotten progressively worse over the years just as my hatred has for what I have become. It's god's cruel joke on me, he heartily laughs at my sexual attraction to bipedal animals, it doesn't even matter if it's male or female for goodness sake. I can't stand the fact that I actively search for furry porn ever 1-3 days. It's even more humiliating that I would actually far prefer seeing myself as an anthro rather than representing myself with my true appearance.
> I can't truthfully claim to have any dignity because of this godforsaken fandom. It is disgusting and just plain weird to lust over a bipedal animal. I would otherwise feel like a truly remarkable individual if it weren't for this plague.
> 
> Well now that I got that off of my chest, I feel as if I have a solid chance for recovery.
> ...


 
You are a fucking troll... worse than that... you are a fucking troll thhat fucks fucking trolls so go get fucked by a fcuking troll you fucking troll and I so mean every word I am saying to you because you are a piece of shit now get the fuck out of here mr. 1 post fucking troll and go fucking fuck yourself!


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I was being serious, but that is fine with me if you don't believe me. I never told anyone in my life that I was furry until now.
> The reason I decided to go to the forum to spill my guts is because I don't know anybody here personally, thus it is easier for me to say.



Ya right. so you come to a furry forum to tell the world about how you hate furries?


----------



## Willow (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> Can I not be an ashamed furry? Is that just not possible for some reason?


 I call bullshit

It's first and foremost a god damned hobby


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> Can I not be an ashamed furry? Is that just not possible for some reason?


 
You are just making me feel more insecure you are just majiing me feel more insecure so go be a troll somewhere else.


----------



## Willow (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I come to this forum to say that I am ashamed to be one! I come to admit that I have a problem with furry porn so I can help myself not have that problem anymore.


 Ashamed for what? Looking at porn? Because it's furry? Does any of that even matter?

There's way worse


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I come to this forum to say that I am ashamed to be one! I come to admit that I have a problem with furry porn so I can help myself not have that problem anymore.



You think you have a problem? you can quit porn anytime, I have developed a dependancy on drugs! that ,ade you think didn't it! are you so addicted to porn that you have a 100% chance of killing yourself if you go without it? (marijuana)
are yous o addictied to porn that your heart would stop if you go too long without it?! (dexamphetamine)
ARE YOU SO ADDICTED TO PORN THAT YOU CAN"T DO SHIT IF YOU MISS ONE DAY?! (dexamphetamine as well)

I have an addiction, you are a troll.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

coward67 said:


> You think you have a problem? you can quit porn anytime, I have developed a dependancy on drugs! that ,ade you think didn't it! are you so addicted to porn that you have a 100% chance of killing yourself if you go without it? (marijuana)
> are yous o addictied to porn that your heart would stop if you go too long without it?! (dexamphetamine)
> ARE YOU SO ADDICTED TO PORN THAT YOU CAN"T DO SHIT IF YOU MISS ONE DAY?! (dexamphetamine as well)
> 
> I have an addiction, you are a troll.


 
Oh look at m e mr. slow typer!


----------



## Pliio8 (Jul 16, 2010)

coward67 said:


> You think you have a problem? you can quit porn anytime, I have developed a dependancy on drugs! that ,ade you think didn't it! are you so addicted to porn that you have a 100% chance of killing yourself if you go without it? (marijuana)
> are yous o addictied to porn that your heart would stop if you go too long without it?! (dexamphetamine)
> ARE YOU SO ADDICTED TO PORN THAT YOU CAN"T DO SHIT IF YOU MISS ONE DAY?! (dexamphetamine as well)
> 
> I have an addiction, you are a troll.


 
If you are that addicted to porn you need more help than some furries on a website. You need a hospital, doctor, psychiatrist and psychologist.

Also, Marijuana doesn't stop your heart unless you smoke 1800 pounds of the shit. you'd die from smoke inhalation long before then.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

I am the one with a problem, you are just trying to troll


----------



## Willow (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> So obviously I find it worse than you do, you don't think it's a big deal but I do. I have my reasons why I think it is horrible, but since people are getting riled up left and right, I will refrain from saying them.


 Look dude

Lemme put it to you in these terms:
-You joined about an hour ago
-You come in here talking about how ashamed you are to be a furry and cry about how God's cursed you
-Your entire post smells of bullshit
-Of course you're going to get your ass chewed 

Were you expecting asspats and hugs?


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Pliio8 said:


> If you are that addicted to porn you need more help than some furries on a website. You need a hospital, doctor, psychiatrist and psychologist.
> 
> Also, Marijuana doesn't stop your heart unless you smoke 1800 pounds of the shit. you'd die from smoke inhalation long before then.



dude I said dexamphetamine to the heart thing, marijuana speeds up your heart by a max of 20 bpm i never said it did.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

I have two addictions, one is mental which is marijuana, one is physical which is dexamphetamiine


----------



## Pliio8 (Jul 16, 2010)

coward67 said:


> dude I said dexamphetamine to the heart thing, marijuana speeds up your heart by a max of 20 bpm i never said it did.


 
Misunderstanding then...

Still, I know amphetamines well enough... you need to get off to a better place man, really.




Fatalflaw said:


> I know, I know, I half expected some anger but then again, I just did this because I want to rid myself of it, your right though I shouldn't have used such harsh terms about the furry fandom whilst posting on a furry website, horrible planning on my part and apologies if I said something offensive. I don't intend to be a hostile.


 
According to ED the one cure for the Furry Virus is An Hero


----------



## Willow (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I know, I know, I half expected some anger but then again, I just did this because I want to rid myself of it, your right though I shouldn't have used such harsh terms about the furry fandom whilst posting on a furry website, horrible planning on my part and apologies if I said something offensive. I don't intend to be a hostile.


 You made it seem like the fandom's such a horrible, horrible thing to be a part of


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

I like marijuana a lot and I have changed my mind about quitting but I will limit myself but the amphetamines thing yeah I am doing my best to quit that. I tried it because everyone else was doing it so I figured hey, why dont I try a line, 1 line was all it took before I started sniffing up 20 megs in the bathroom before class and then I noticed in improved my music making abilities so I started doing even more...
well anyway that is my addiction I woild like to see what that troll guy has to say to that.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I like myself far too much for "an hero" just as you wouldn't resort to that (though you apparently are not bothered by being a furry.)
> 
> If you ever do consider the option of not being a furry try the twelve steps program.



You should try the twelve steps outta here before I kick your ass program!


----------



## Pliio8 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I like myself far too much for "an hero" just as you wouldn't resort to that (though you apparently are not bothered by being a furry.)
> 
> If you ever do consider the option of not being a furry try the twelve steps program.


 
Furry isn't a mental illness or disease, its a hobby for some, a lifestyle for others, an interest for some. Everyone is furry to an extent, the word furry is only applied when people enter the fandom and begin their own thing.

And with, that.... i'm out.


----------



## Aden (Jul 16, 2010)

coward67 said:


> You are a fucking troll... worse than that... you are a fucking troll thhat fucks fucking trolls so go get fucked by a fcuking troll you fucking troll and I so mean every word I am saying to you because you are a piece of shit now get the fuck out of here mr. 1 post fucking troll and go fucking fuck yourself!





coward67 said:


> You should try the twelve steps outta here before I kick your ass program!


 
Hooooly shit
you lose your meds, bro?

\People like you are what make us such easy targets, you ass


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

lol sorry for that, I have a problem with anger, I'm usually really cool even when someone is pissing me off but sometimes I just blow a fuse for no reason.
EDIT: or atleast a little reason


----------



## Willow (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> (though you apparently are not bothered by being a furry.)


 You're right, I'm not bothered by liking cartoon animals and wanting to draw them

I should feel so ashamed


----------



## Lemoncholic (Jul 16, 2010)

You think you guys have problems? I know you can tell just by looking at my face, a word about my weakness I'm totally addicted to bass!


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I like myself far too much for "an hero" just as you wouldn't resort to that (though you apparently are not bothered by being a furry.)
> 
> If you ever do consider the option of not being a furry try the twelve steps program.


 
There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a furry. It's no different than being otaku, goth, lolita, etc.

Furries are people. Some of them take the fandom too far. The majority of us are productive members of society (or like myself will be one day if I ever finish college). Just because you can't see past a few people's jaded experiences of the furry community doesn't give you a right to judge us. 

Go back to /b/, you'll find plenty of other haters there, and be a closet furry, it won't affect us at all.


----------



## Willow (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I think coward67 is pretty cool guy, eh sticks it to animals who smokes marijuana and doesn't afraid of anything


 


Fatalflaw said:


> I think furries are pretty cool guys, eh likes animal pronz and doesn't afraid of anything


 


Fatalflaw said:


> I think Fenrari is pretty cool guy, eh is dumb as hell and doesn't afraid of anything.


 /b/ is missing you


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 16, 2010)

WillowWulf said:


> /b/ is missing you


 
I think /b/ rejected him actually... Trolls don't have lives remember. They're sole purpose in life is to hope they can piss someone else off. Ignore him, he'll go running back to mommy when he sees he can't toy with us.


----------



## Aden (Jul 16, 2010)

Internet protip #295: Rattling off memes makes you clever and funny!


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> I am a furry and want to become an hero. u mad?


 
Please fix your grammar.


----------



## Aden (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> Fennec dicks for the win!


 
Whoa now, I'm taken


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> U mad?



You mean: "Are you mad?"
And yes, I am mad, I have survived in a forum for trolls and grammar nazis and it has changed me. Please fix your grammar and watch monty python, then you can troll around Moreawesomethanyou.


----------



## Aden (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> i herd u liek taking it up the ass?


 
>FatalFlaw has never tried taking it up the ass
>really should
feels good man


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> i herd u liek taking it up the ass?



You were mistaken. Your idiotic grammar just proves you are an idiot and you have no right to even speak a word unless you know the language you are speaking. I can't wait untill someone bans you. Your avatar only fuels my deep hate for you, the only way I could hate you more is if you were tongan.
By the way you are typing, you probably are tongan, so I encourage you to leave here and go make your grandmother eat a dog and then eat her you sick bastard. I would like to see you try to survive in moreawesomethanyou, they are more brutal than /b/. They will eat you alive.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Wow this troll is fun, huh?


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Fatalflaw said:


> Sorry the pool's closed, but enjoy your aids anyways



That was a good attempt at fixing your grammar, but unfortunately you forgot the full stop.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

What the fuck, is an epeen? Is that what you call your mother in bed at night?


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Once you have spent enough time in the most brutal forum on earth, you develop a tolerance to trolls like you, you haven't offended me, you have mad me laugh at your failure at being a troll.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Yes, I do like animal dicks, I like them in my mouth and I moan with pleasure when a sexy husky unleashes his hot cum load in my mouth, there is nothing wrong with that. You, on the other hand, get that way with your mother.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Well then... It seems you are even more retarded than I had thought. If you want to kill yourself, be my guest.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Yes, I am a pot head, and I am proud of it!
If I were a woman's vagina, that would imply I get more sex than you do, retarded /b/tard.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

I am not obese, that comment made me laugh so hard I dribbled coke on my laptop. I am, infact skinny because of my addiction to dexamphetamine. Although I have only had sex with 4 human beings, that does not make me a slut. You have problems, I encourage you to try the 12 step program... The take 12 steps outta here before I kick your ass so hard you go crying to your mother so that she gives you a pussy ON your dick because your dick is too small to fit in her pussy program. I am bored with you, so I am leaving.


----------



## Aden (Jul 16, 2010)

Both of you are extremely boring :T


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

That was a bad idea checking in to see what Aden said. I have seen the mistake I made in saying 'slut' when I meant to say 'virgin'. And now I shall leave.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

Also one last thing... I eat trolls like you for breakfast! Not many people know this, but I am a psychopath! I learned from a therapist how to be a normal person, but that evil was always there! And you have awakened it! You don't know how good it feels to be back in black, I suppose I should say: "thank you!"
And with _that_ I leave.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

HA! I win!


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

That is annoying, it appears I have not won this little discussion. Let's take this elsewhere huh? I will create a new thread.


----------



## coward67 (Jul 16, 2010)

http://forums.furaffinity.net/threads/77913-Fatalflaw.


----------



## Leon (Jul 17, 2010)

Well, I finally came out to my dad about me being Bi, and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Which actually surprised me, he's conservative, is totally opposed to anything that has to do with homosexuals, even oppossed on gay marriage, so yeah was a shock when he didn't flip his shit, although he didn't talk or look at me for a few days. But, glad I did it. ^^


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 17, 2010)

leon said:


> Well, I finally came out to my dad about me being Bi, and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Which actually surprised me, he's conservative, is totally opposed to anything that has to do with homosexuals, even oppossed on gay marriage, so yeah was a shock when he didn't flip his shit, although he didn't talk or look at me for a few days. But, glad I did it. ^^


 
I'm glad everything worked out well for you  Tolerance and Understanding is the only way to move forward into a new age.


----------



## Willow (Jul 17, 2010)

Awww, I missed that guy getting b&


----------



## Stargazer Bleu (Jul 17, 2010)

leon said:


> Well, I finally came out to my dad about me being Bi, and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Which actually surprised me, he's conservative, is totally opposed to anything that has to do with homosexuals, even oppossed on gay marriage, so yeah was a shock when he didn't flip his shit, although he didn't talk or look at me for a few days. But, glad I did it. ^^


 
Glad to hear things went over well.  
Could be cause your his son and wants you to be happy.
Also maybe since your bi maybe there's the chance he thinks you will go straight?

He talking to you again?


----------



## Nyedyr (Jul 18, 2010)

It's only been a few weeks since I told friends and family that I'm bi. Of course, I was in denial up until then. Anyone that honestly believes that being bi, straight, gay, whatever is a choice just baffles me. It definitely is not. I was bi all my life. I was into boys before girls, even. However, for some reason, I didn't want to believe I was gay OR bi. For 15 years, I would hope and pray (literally bow down and pray) that one day I would be "cured." At one point, I even forced myself to become homophobic, hoping I could use hatred to set myself right.

All those years I stressed myself out. That, with other things seemed to pool into this very negative self image I formed of myself. Finally, a few weeks ago, the pressure hit the cork. I ended up telling a friend (which I knew that he knew; denial is VERY powerful and cruel). Of course he was cool with it. After telling him, I was able to conjure the courage to tell others. With Facebook as my friend, I ended up telling the majority of my friends and family. Even the most conservative, and most nerve-racking friends were absolutely fine. Now? I am not afraid at all.

Coming out really helped me. That negative image I have just up and left. I have no fears. I'm more open to others, and not so socially awkward. I can easily say that coming out was the best, and most important thing I've done in my life, so far. I don't worry, I don't stress, and I don't fret. I wouldn't even have been upset IF some of my friends left me, because at least I had myself again. About the only one I avoid finding out is my grandmother. I love her, even if she's a bigot. I'm not afraid, I just don't want to give her a heart attack or something...

Anyway, now; life is so much more enjoyable. People do treat me differently though. My mom (who had the most anti-climactic reaction) especially. She definitely is "over" supportive. Whenever she see's someone that's probably gay, she always has to mention them to me... Once, I did something that she said was "a guy thing," and I called her on it.

"A guy thing?" I asked. "Well, you're half guy," she replied.... My eyes probably went watermelon sized. "I'M WHOLE GUY!"

Anyway, sorry for the long post. The only reason I rant so much is because it is still new to me, and I really hope people learn from my mistake. If anyone believes that their families or friends would be supportive and loving when you told them... TELL THEM! Even if it's to just one person. One friend, a counselor, a distant relative... Just one person to release the steam helps. You're only hurting yourself by not coming out to those that love and support you. That's what I learned...

One last thing before I hush up. This just happens to be the funniest thing I ever heard: One friend that is extremely Christian/conservative was my biggest worry about how they would react. Her's ended up being the best. We were texting on the subject, and she sends me one that was amazing. She said that, at first, she was shocked and confused. But then, she started to think about it, and it made sense. She said that she always loved that I would sit and listen and let her vent, and really hear what she had to say when she had a problem. Then she said, "No straight guy ever does that."

Ok, that's it. Sorry for the giant post! Thank you for allowing me to vent...


----------



## Browder (Jul 18, 2010)

^Best post in the thread. Bravo. I'm glad you had the courage to do it and I'm glad things went well for you,


----------



## <CaliforniaStripes> (Jul 20, 2010)

Wow that sounds exactly what I'm going through still 3 months after finally convincing myself I'm bi, yet i still don't have the courage to tell my parents. Friends on the other hand have taken it very well which is all i need for now, still i salute you for the courage to tell your parents about your sexuality.


----------



## footfoe (Jul 20, 2010)

I had to come out to my parents.

lol jk, i'm normal


----------



## Hir (Jul 20, 2010)

coward67 said:


> Also one last thing... I eat trolls like you for breakfast! Not many people know this, but I am a psychopath! I learned from a therapist how to be a normal person, but that evil was always there! And you have awakened it! You don't know how good it feels to be back in black, I suppose I should say: "thank you!"
> And with _that_ I leave.


 Shut the fuck up.


----------



## bloodbirds (Jul 20, 2010)

As of now only 2 close people know... and the internet I suppose . One  is an old friend I contacted for advice over it since she's Bi. The  other is my mum, only because she said the stupidest shit about bis, and she doesn't care though I told her to keep her mouth  shut :O.  
  I've come close to telling people several times but it's far too awkward  lol. That and I often feel nobody actually needs to know. Ah, the  closet dilemma!

  I suppose the hardest part was getting my head around my feelings at  all. In retrospect it seems so obvious and I feel like i've wasted so  much of my life x.x. Almost 22 and I was only ever seriously  attracted to one girl and was always in denial over liking guys. Going  to kill myself.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Nyedyr said:


> It's only been a few weeks since I told friends and family that I'm bi. Of course, I was in denial up until then. Anyone that honestly believes that being bi, straight, gay, whatever is a choice just baffles me. It definitely is not. I was bi all my life. I was into boys before girls, even. However, for some reason, I didn't want to believe I was gay OR bi. For 15 years, I would hope and pray (literally bow down and pray) that one day I would be "cured." At one point, I even forced myself to become homophobic, hoping I could use hatred to set myself right.
> 
> All those years I stressed myself out. That, with other things seemed to pool into this very negative self image I formed of myself. Finally, a few weeks ago, the pressure hit the cork. I ended up telling a friend (which I knew that he knew; denial is VERY powerful and cruel). Of course he was cool with it. After telling him, I was able to conjure the courage to tell others. With Facebook as my friend, I ended up telling the majority of my friends and family. Even the most conservative, and most nerve-racking friends were absolutely fine. Now? I am not afraid at all.
> 
> ...



Wow, I wish I had your courage, the only people who know im bi are other furries, everytime I think about telling a close friend or family I get so scared I can hardly think.

I started the ball rolling on facebook by posting I was a furry, also posted my fangirl-esque obsession with kirk and spoc, I hope that if I let loose little stuff like this eventually it will force me to tell everyone, I dont know what else to do, even just typing this is giving me a stomachache because im so worried.


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

chrest said:


> Wow, I wish I had your courage, the only people who know im bi are other furries, everytime I think about telling a close friend or family I get so scared I can hardly think.
> 
> I started the ball rolling on facebook by posting I was a furry, also posted my fangirl-esque obsession with kirk and spoc, I hope that if I let loose little stuff like this eventually it will force me to tell everyone, I dont know what else to do, even just typing this is giving me a stomachache because im so worried.



You have to start off small. Don't force yourself out of your comfort range. If you want someone to talk to about it, myself and a large portion of this forum know what it's like. We'll be here for you.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> You have to start off small. Don't force yourself out of your comfort range. If you want someone to talk to about it, myself and a large portion of this forum know what it's like. We'll be here for you.



thank you, it makes me feel better knowing I have support, I guess I might have been rushing things a bit, you just saved me from a big mistake, I was just about to post it on facebook when you wrote this, I should take it slow ^^


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

chrest said:


> thank you, it makes me feel better knowing I have support, I guess I might have been rushing things a bit, you just saved me from a big mistake, I was just about to post it on facebook when you wrote this, I should take it slow ^^


 
Realizing what your own comfort level is takes time. Rash decisions might feel good but they have unforseen side effects. I've been down that path before multiple times. 

*holds your paw*

You'll know when it's the right time to say/do things.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> Realizing what your own comfort level is takes time. Rash decisions might feel good but they have unforseen side effects. I've been down that path before multiple times.
> 
> *holds your paw*
> 
> You'll know when it's the right time to say/do things.


 
Thanks ^^
I totally almost made a harsh decision there, thank you so much, your right, I'll wait until the time is right ^^ It'll be hard to hold it in, but i'll do my best


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

chrest said:


> Thanks ^^
> I totally almost made a harsh decision there, thank you so much, your right, I'll wait until the time is right ^^ It'll be hard to hold it in, but i'll do my best


 
Well, like I said before if you need someone to talk about things in general with, I'm on AIM, YIM and LIVE anytime I'm awake.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> Well, like I said before if you need someone to talk about things in general with, I'm on AIM, YIM and LIVE anytime I'm awake.


 ok, thank you 
and btw, it's about 3 am here, what time is it in midgard? So i have a rough idea of when you may be contactable?


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

chrest said:


> ok, thank you
> and btw, it's about 3 am here, what time is it in midgard? So i have a rough idea of when you may be contactable?


 
 West Coast?

(I'm in Florida) But since I work nights and I'm just up late in general it doesn't really matter when I'm just available. It's about 6 here.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> West Coast?
> 
> (I'm in Florida) But since I work nights and I'm just up late in general it doesn't really matter when I'm just available. It's about 6 here.



ok, thanks again for your support, it's good to know im not in it alone ^^


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

chrest said:


> ok, thanks again for your support, it's good to know im not in it alone ^^


 
 I liked you from the moment I saw your Diego avatar (I loved DDoS and pretty much everything else by Blotch).  If anything a good friend should be there for his friends.


----------



## Rainami (Jul 22, 2010)

Okay, I'm not sure if I've posted in this thread before but I can't find any record of it so I guess I haven't.

I'm bi; all my friends know; my brother knows; my parents do not. Most people's reaction was, "That's fine," though I rendered my brother speechless for a good 20 minutes when I told him.

I'm very hesitant to tell my parents because they're under so much stress right now that any more from me might break them. Financial stress, mostly. My dad's a state certified sociopath who has no compassion for homosexuals of any degree, and I'm pretty sure he would take to it badly. My mom's more understanding, but the added stress of knowing and trying to keep it from my dad would give her an aneurysm.

I'm pretty sure that qualifies as valid circumstances to suffer that burden alone. Some people would disagree though.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> I liked you from the moment I saw your Diego avatar (I loved DDoS and pretty much everything else by Blotch).  If anything a good friend should be there for his friends.



Thank you ^^

I also like your avatar, It makes me feel like your the kind of person who's caring and sweet, but is also fun at partys and has a good sense of humor ^^


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

chrest said:


> Thank you ^^
> 
> I also like your avatar, It makes me feel like your the kind of person who's caring and sweet, but is also fun at partys and has a good sense of humor ^^


 
 Well I can definitely be all 4 of those things. That's kinda how I am in real life. If anything I promised myself that I'd be there to listen to my friends even if I couldn't do anything else for them. And sometimes that's really all you have to be able to do.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Rainami said:


> Okay, I'm not sure if I've posted in this thread before but I can't find any record of it so I guess I haven't.
> 
> I'm bi; all my friends know; my brother knows; my parents do not. Most people's reaction was, "That's fine," though I rendered my brother speechless for a good 20 minutes when I told him.
> 
> ...


I think it may be best to wait on them then, at least until they are less stressed




Fenrari said:


> Well I can definitely be all 4 of those things. That's kinda how I am in real life. If anything I promised myself that I'd be there to listen to my friends even if I couldn't do anything else for them. And sometimes that's really all you have to be able to do.


Your right on that one


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

Rainami said:


> Okay, I'm not sure if I've posted in this thread before but I can't find any record of it so I guess I haven't.
> 
> I'm bi; all my friends know; my brother knows; my parents do not. Most people's reaction was, "That's fine," though I rendered my brother speechless for a good 20 minutes when I told him.
> 
> ...


 
 Another Floridian. Well Rain, follow what you think is best. Or just wait till you aren't a burden to your parents to mention it. You're a fine person I'm sure so to say the least your parents will eventually embrace you.



chrest said:


> Your right on that one


----------



## Rainami (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> Another Floridian. Well Rain, follow what you think is best. Or just wait till you aren't a burden to your parents to mention it. You're a fine person I'm sure so to say the least your parents will eventually embrace you.


I'm sure they would, but it's just another thing suffocating me right now. Fuck you, University of Central Florida, for putting off my application so I have to wait until Spring 2011 to continue my education!


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

Rainami said:


> I'm sure they would, but it's just another thing suffocating me right now. Fuck you, University of Central Florida, for putting off my application so I have to wait until Spring 2011 to continue my education!


 
 I'm sorry to hear so... I'm at FSU right now. But if you want to know some people there; I have some furry friends that you'd probably find interesting. Well either way I hope things work out for you.


----------



## Rainami (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> I'm sorry to hear so... I'm at FSU right now. But if you want to know some people there; I have some furry friends that you'd probably find interesting. Well either way I hope things work out for you.


Thanks. I've been trying to find local people (furry and otherwise) to hang out with so I can distract myself from the crap I have to deal with. So far, to no avail.


----------



## bloodbirds (Jul 22, 2010)

jeez I wish I had the courage to even come out to close firends =\. I feel much the same way as Chrest in that I get close to saying something and then I just shut down from fear haha


----------



## Rainami (Jul 22, 2010)

Remember that they're your close friends for a reason.


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

bloodbirds said:


> jeez I wish I had the courage to even come out to close firends =\. I feel much the same way as Chrest in that I get close to saying something and then I just shut down from fear haha


 
I don't think it's so much fear as worrying that you won't be accepted or as accepted as you were before. There's nothing wrong with just waiting. You'd be suprised how open minded most people are. And you know if they don't accept you... They really weren't your friends to begin with.


----------



## Maddawg (Jul 22, 2010)

Close friends are the only ones that know i'm a furry. Thank God for that!


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

Maddawg said:


> Close friends are the only ones that know i'm a furry. Thank God for that!


 
 don't let the higher ups hear you... Very few of them approve of people who "come out as furries."


----------



## Maddawg (Jul 22, 2010)

Got it.


----------



## Rainami (Jul 22, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> don't let the higher ups hear you... Very few of them approve of people who "come out as furries."


I agree with their arguments that you shouldn't "come out as furry" because it's a totally different league than coming out as gay or bi; but by the same token I was more afraid of people finding out about my furry stuff than about liking guys. Call me backwards.


----------



## bloodbirds (Jul 22, 2010)

haha, in my uni course we have the "warcraft closet". People are affraid to reveal anything about themselves that might meet resistance.


----------



## Fenrari (Jul 22, 2010)

Rainami said:


> I agree with their arguments that you shouldn't "come out as furry" because it's a totally different league than coming out as gay or bi; but by the same token I was more afraid of people finding out about my furry stuff than about liking guys. Call me backwards.



Well it's not really as uncommon as you think. People finding out about either aspect of you would change their perception of you. As the term furry still has a negative connotation with the majority of the net, they'll probably have a bad initial view and associate accordingly. The gay equality movement suffers to a degree the same stigma. Just wait till you feel comfortable is my best advice. 



bloodbirds said:


> haha, in my uni course we have the "warcraft closet". People are affraid to reveal anything about themselves that might meet resistance.


 
 I am a recovering and happily addicted WoW-nerd... and this is my story.


----------



## chrest (Jul 22, 2010)

Rainami said:


> I agree with their arguments that you shouldn't "come out as furry" because it's a totally different league than coming out as gay or bi; but by the same token I was more afraid of people finding out about my furry stuff than about liking guys. Call me backwards.



another thing to think about when coming out as a furry is the fact of the stereotypes, when you say furry in general, everything they have ever heard about the fandom is applied to you, all fetishes and whatnot, So saying your a furry doesnt just mean "Hey, Sometimes I pretend to be an animal" It also means to them whatever they have heard, so you would have to set them straight.

Or at least...thats how I see it ^^


----------



## Leon (Jul 24, 2010)

Well, a few days after I came out I told my dad how I didn't like the way he treated me after I came out, and he just brushed it aside, so I don't care. Makes me feel better.


----------



## Jude (Aug 15, 2010)

I'm trying to use the furry thing as a crutch of coming out as bi to my parents. I know that's frowned upon, but I don't know what else to do. My interest in women have greatly decreased over the past few years, but it's still enough to say I'm interested in women. With men, I don't know why, but I'm extremely picky. I mean, unrealistically picky. I would either need to lower my standards or improve myself physically before I would even consider going out with a guy. It's at the point right now where I am questioning whether I should come out or not, just because of this. Another thing, my interest in women have gradually been decreasing. I don't wanna say I'm bi, and then later say "oh, I changed my mind, I'm gay". Especially since I'm 15, that would convince my parents that I'm going through a phase, and I really don't want that. Or maybe I am, and I'm really straight. Oh, this is so confusing.

EDIT: Well, there are a few guys at my school that I would really consider attractive, but my school is like 97% straight


----------



## Jashwa (Aug 15, 2010)

Don't come out or anything if you aren't sure. Also, you're 15. It's probably a phase. You'll probably "change" sexualities a bunch before you settle on one you're sure of.


----------



## Jude (Aug 15, 2010)

Pretty damn long phase then. I've been asking myself these questions for like a year and a half :/


----------



## Ratte (Aug 15, 2010)

I'm gay and I flat out refuse to tell anyone in my family.  Only my online friends and those on my FB know.  I was almost found out when I wasn't home to get my NMB ring in the mail.  I know that if my dad found out, he'd either turn into a bigger dick than he is or cut all communication with me, and his whole family would follow suit.  As with my mom, I really don't think she'd have the patience for it.  Yay religious households.


----------



## AkiraSumimura (Aug 15, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Pretty damn long phase then. I've been asking myself these questions for like a year and a half :/


 
Suck a bloke off. If you like it you're gay.


----------



## Jude (Aug 15, 2010)

Pretty blunt way of putting it XD


----------



## Jagged (Aug 17, 2010)

I've been out of the "closet" for quite a while now, to everyone except my family, lol
But just a month or so ago, I told my mother about being bi; and strangely enough, she was cool with it. o_____o It's funny, because I've always known her to be quite the homophobe. Now my whole immediate family knows..... So, yeah.  Cool beans.  And nice thread idea. ;D


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 17, 2010)

I was always a strait looking and acting guy... I wasn't anti-social, but I never made it a point to go looking for dates or anything... I enjoyed the peace n quiet of being alone... Everyone assumed I was prolly gay... So by the time I told a friend I was bi, he wasn't really surprised but respectfully didn't make it a big deal and blab to every1 about it...


----------



## AkiraSumimura (Aug 17, 2010)

[yt]u5m4QGmFHAc[/yt]


----------



## Gavrill (Aug 17, 2010)

Dude, stop with the fucking youtube videos already.


----------



## AkiraSumimura (Aug 17, 2010)

Molly said:


> Dude, stop with the fucking youtube videos already.


 
[yt]IT0ofNU1NzA[/yt]


----------



## Gavrill (Aug 17, 2010)

hurr hurr


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

Molly said:


> hurr hurr


hey, that's what I said!


----------



## Gavrill (Aug 17, 2010)

GrowlBurger said:


> hey, that's what I said!


 
You've got something on your nose


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

???


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 17, 2010)

Molly said:


> You've got something on your nose





GrowlBurger said:


> ???


 
el oh el smiley face


----------



## Gavrill (Aug 17, 2010)

itswhatido20 said:


> el oh el smiley face


You're cool for getting that |3

Also yaay a femboi *flirtflirtflirt*


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 17, 2010)

Molly said:


> You're cool for getting that |3
> 
> Also yaay a femboi *flirtflirtflirt*


 
*Blush**shyness*


----------



## AkiraSumimura (Aug 17, 2010)

Molly said:


> You're cool for getting that |3
> 
> Also yaay a femboi *flirtflirtflirt*


 
[yt]itFmvLbzxsc[/yt]


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

Molly said:


> You're cool for getting that |3
> 
> Also yaay a femboi *flirtflirtflirt*


At least now I can feel justified in not taking you seriously at all


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 17, 2010)

GrowlBurger said:


> At least now I can feel justified in not taking you seriously at all


 
Welcome to the interwebz... *roundhouse kick* XD


----------



## SnowFox (Aug 17, 2010)

GrowlBurger said:


> At least now I can feel justified in not taking you seriously at all


 
I have a suspicion, but I'm probably wrong.


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

itswhatido20 said:


> Welcome to the interwebz... *roundhouse kick* XD


Hey, that's not very effeminate!



SnowFox said:


> I have a suspicion, but I'm probably wrong.


Don't speak in riddles, it's rude :<


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 17, 2010)

GrowlBurger said:


> Hey, that's not very effeminate!


 
The femenine thing to would have been Foot2Nutz... we can change that if u want >.>


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

no that's just bitch-ass


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

real girls dont hit guys EVAR


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 17, 2010)

No... it's real men don't hit chix... it defines them as being cowards...

Quit whining and act hurt and I might kiss ur booboo... cuz thats quite fem...


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

I hit my girl friend every day

she deserves it, so its ok


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 17, 2010)

GrowlBurger said:


> I hit my girl friend every day
> 
> she deserves it, so its ok


 
I'm embarassed to be part of the same gender as you...


----------



## GrowlBurger (Aug 17, 2010)

I told her to make me dinner, and she was like "ok just let me finish watching my show" so I smacked her and told her to make it now. Then I stole the TV while she was gone, so when she was done, she had nothing to do but go to our room and cry.

Tomorrow is her birthday though, so I'm gonna take her out to dinner at McDonald's, and let her ride in the front seat of the car! She loves riding in the front seat. ^___^


----------



## NyteWerewolf (Aug 17, 2010)

well i'm a single bisexual dom wolf boy who likes to crossdress


----------



## AkiraSumimura (Aug 17, 2010)

[yt]gIJTDwyQw5Y[/yt]


----------



## Gavrill (Aug 17, 2010)

SnowFox said:


> I have a suspicion, but I'm probably wrong.


 Yeah...I have deja vu.....


----------



## itswhatido20 (Aug 18, 2010)

Good riddance? >.>


----------



## NyteWerewolf (Aug 18, 2010)

who me?


----------



## coward67 (Aug 18, 2010)

New home, new friends, soon to be new job, I'm all the way back in the closet.


----------



## NyteWerewolf (Aug 18, 2010)

why would you go back into the closet?


----------



## coward67 (Aug 18, 2010)

Different country. I'm not out of the closet here.


----------



## NyteWerewolf (Aug 18, 2010)

well on FAF you can come out of the closet


----------



## Kayze (Aug 25, 2010)

*I've done it :V*

Well, after being asked if I had a girlfriend for the 100th time, being pushed by parents to keep it super personal (to lie, basically), and just otherwise watch how I am or what I say; I was fed up with it.

I wasn't exactly a 'closet gay' per say, but out of the benefit for my parents to not get the spotlight with their friends or my mom's folks (or family in general) to know that the future girlfriend will never exist... I kept it a white lie. I'd try all I could to not lie and just stir the conversation, as in not to volunteer information or insight. But now i was fed up with it, cause it was like me saying "I'm unable to get a girlfriend cause of my sword that has +8 strength instead of +5 spirit" (nerdy example of being 'unable' to find love). I'm able to find love and be in love, but it's not with a woman. :V

So, I've not openly come out. did a rainbow fly out of my ass and my clothes shrink? Nope (thank goodness). I'm very much the same person, I just don't have to lie about my love life or try to twist words around. How did I do this? Well, lots of friends and family on Facebook, I posted a status update. I first posted something that was more indirect, sorta giving a message but a easier blow. This time, I posted my reasoning for the statement, and to clearify it's not cause I don't want commitment with a woman, but that I'm homo. I also stated me liking other men is the only difference, where my beliefs and personality are the same.

So yeah... :V time to see if people remove me from friends, drama unfolds, etc. To me, that's not a bad thing. I'm able to see who are my actual friends and test my family in a sense. Might be a bad outcome, might be a denial outcome, or might have the hoped outcome of understanding and accepting.

*TL;DR:* After being asked about girlfriend status so many times, I decided it's best people at least know there will not be a girlfriend... By posting a status update on my facebook that is friends with many of my friends and family. The first was vague and could be seen as me just not wanting commitment, the recent one explained what I meant and directly stated I'm homo. Stated that liking other men is the only difference from what they know of me. Now I get to see who are my friend or not, and if any drama comes out of it.


----------



## Jagged (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

Well, good for you. x]  
It takes courage to come out openly with something like that; and it always makes me smile to see people finally being honest with those they care about.
Yay :3


----------



## Cam (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

Thats pretty badass!!

It took me years before I could even start telling people i was bisexual. Even my family still doesn't know it yet..

Ive really always wanted to tell my mom but just never could.. but its a bit too late for me (still too soon to go into detail)

I was totally expecting a very... 'weirded out' kind of reaction from my friends, but surprisingly they were pretty accepting of it.

Im not sure if posting a facebook status was the best way to get the message across, but if it worked then i guess thats good 

You'll probably get the denial reaction, then the accepting (errr, well at least thats what I got)


----------



## Velystord (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

my parents dont even know i have an email so your doing better than i am


----------



## foxmusk (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

good luck kayze :3


----------



## Mayonnaise (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

I would never be brave enough to do this...

Good luck!


----------



## Eske (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

Congratulations, Kayze.  That's not an easy thing to do, and I hope it's nothing but smooth sailing from here on out.


----------



## Karimah (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

I wish you the best, honestly :3 I'm glad that you understand that people will reveal who they are toward you, and while there may be a rough road ahead, you'll definitely find close friends through the process. I wish I had half the courage you do, stay strong â™¥


----------



## coward67 (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

Hey nice! I hope everything works out for you. Mind telling me how I might come out to my general circle of friends?


----------



## Jude (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

Congrats. I told like two of my friends over a year ago, and I never was treated the same by them again. I REALLY hope that doesn't happen with my parents whenever I work up the guts to tell them (If I am, still figuring it out). Anyway, I hope everything works out in the end.


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*



coward67 said:


> Hey nice! I hope everything works out for you. Mind telling me how I might come out to my general circle of friends?



Ditch them, cut all ties with them and find friends elsewhere. Sounds quite a blunt way, but this could be done over a period of time.

As far as everyone knows irl, I am straight as a flagpole. this is mainly because I am unsure of my sexuality myself. I like calling myself Bisexual though.


----------



## Willow (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

Well isn't that just Jim dandy. 

I'm still contemplating my sexuality (fuck being a teenager), but I told my closest friend that I might possibly be bi. I'm still her gay friend though. lul


----------



## Fenrari (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*

More power to you Kayze. 

I don't have the guts to go that far at the moment... But that might just be me.


----------



## Kayze (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*



cmrnmrphy said:


> Thats pretty badass!!
> 
> It took me years before I could even start telling people i was bisexual. Even my family still doesn't know it yet..
> 
> ...


       I've known about my sexuality for around 3 years now, and was just sick  of white lies. My parents found out accidently, in a sense, and well, it  was quite a spill until they've come to the point where they brush it  under the rug. Sure, that can be seen as "at least they will still treat  you as their son" but to be there and just agree with them on jokes of  girlfriends and otherwise deny having one, just to please others, it's  BS. It's like, I'd rather them resent me than treat it like that.  Homosexuality s not a pressing issue, but that doesn't give the excuse  to just brush it under and not talk about it (in terms of having a  boyfriend, etc) and just lie to others.

      I said that I was out of the closet already, which I was. But I sorta  went back on my word when I would lie about a girlfriend status (in the  sense of not having one 'yet', when I will never ). So, seeing that, I  got fed up with it. So it's either they accept it as an expectation  that I won't have a girlfriend and can love a man, and still know I'm  the same person. If they can't, that's more reason I shouldn't just lie  to be around them. I'm thinking of bringing up the Facebook thing  tonight, where i suppose my grandparents will know now. I'm still the  same guy, so if this is a problem then fuck you, essentially  family  is close, but cause of this lying, I've been hurting from it, so yeah,  it needs to be done.

      And see, the new generations are being more excepting of difference.  It's good to expose difference and let a person decide their side of it,  and more importantly have them know tolerance. 


Velystord said:


> my parents dont even know i have an email so your doing better than i am


      Yeah, they found out and took it special. But really, too bad. You gotta  face it, and stop burying or I don't want to be your son. Family love  is unconditional, so this 'condition' shouldn't be an exception.



HarleyRoadkill said:


> good luck kayze :3


    *hugs* :3


Radio Viewer said:


> I would never be brave enough to do this...
> 
> Good luck!


    It took time of being fed up and hurt from how I essentially have to lie  to be accepted, that I just wanted to actually test it. So brave or  not, it's a matter of finding out who are my loved ones and friends.


Eske said:


> Congratulations, Kayze.  That's not an easy thing to  do, and I hope it's nothing but smooth sailing from here on out.


  Yeah, regardless of how this thread might make me seem, I  was very much finding difficulty in sending that and still find it hard  to talk about, cause it's personal and hurts when people are disgusted  about it.


Karimah said:


> I wish you the best, honestly :3 I'm glad that  you understand that people will reveal who they are toward you, and  while there may be a rough road ahead, you'll definitely find close  friends through the process. I wish I had half the courage you do, stay  strong â™¥


 Thanks :3 Life has rough roads everywhere, it's  when we hold onto the past, dragging it by the ankles just to have it,  is when we lose ourselves in it. You gotta move on and those that won't,  are not worth the trouble. Life is great cause there's always a  solution, a future.


coward67 said:


> Hey nice! I hope everything works out for you.  Mind telling me how I might come out to my general circle of  friends?


 Well, I came out in a sorta easier way by just  posting it. I'd say, it depends how close to your friends you are and  how much opposition, if any, they have towards same sex stuff. If it  just disgusts them, then it will be easy, but if they have active  intolerance, it could be harder. It's best to ease it into convo, and  pick the right time to do it. Cause it could cause awkwardness  Send me some info on your relations with them and I'll try to help via PM :3


DrumFur said:


> Congrats. I told like two of my friends over a year ago, and I never was treated the same by them again. I REALLY hope that doesn't happen with my parents whenever I work up the guts to tell them (If I am, still figuring it out). Anyway, I hope everything works out in the end.


 Thing is, people will hand stuff differently. If they treat you like a "special person" then try to push you're not and start distancing yourself if needed. If thye can't suck it up, then they're not real friends. Remember the good times, and that's good enough. As for your parents, make it a deep hearted convo and how you were scared of their reaction and that it hurts when it's seen negatively. You might also just wanna start that convo after talking about yourself a bit, you know show who you are. That helped my parents a little, as it helps show I'm the same person, and the rest of me is what you know, but I just don't like the opposite sex. Just do it in a son to parents thing, show it's a tender issue. It's still very hard, it was for me.


----------



## Kayze (Aug 25, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*



RandyDarkshade said:


> Ditch them, cut all ties with them and  find friends elsewhere. Sounds quite a blunt way, but this could be done  over a period of time.
> 
> As far as everyone knows irl, I am  straight as a flagpole. this is mainly because I am unsure of my  sexuality myself. I like calling myself Bisexual though.


  Ditch them only if they do not accept it in a sense. That being, they  don't have to admire it, but just understand and not let it change  things, for that's just stupid when the only difference is the appeal to  the same sex. If they do not wish to treat you the same, ditch them. In  time they'll grow up or you'll be out of those friends that weren't  really friends in the first place. Just fun hang out buddies (assumed).

 Everyone is surprised when they learn it. I don't act at all  stereotypically, and only show those 'friendly' emotions with the right  people (close friends, gay friends, etc), since I'd be comfortable then.  And well, I don't try to act like it as a way to keep people from  feeling i'm a stereotype, it's just who I am. And well, I do love manly  men; That being, the strong yet romantic type and not the femmy boys,  not saying anything is wrong with them of course, just preference.

 Anyways, friends are those that like who you are. If they can't  accept/respect a differing sexuality, then they should just stay in  their own comfort group of idiotic closed-minded tards.


Willow said:


> Well isn't that just Jim dandy.
> 
> I'm still  contemplating my sexuality (fuck being a teenager), but I told my  closest friend that I might possibly be bi. I'm still her gay friend  though. lul


 Really, I've been twisted from bi to gay and  back again and then back to gay. Thing is, I don't have sexual desires  for woman, and even the comfort relation of my own sex makes me like it  more. I might still be bi, it's just I'm not very sexual regardless and  have interest in male anatomy with other desires.

Teen is too young, just wait and understand how you feel, why you feel  that way, and start piecing it together. Even experience will help,  later, which confirmed it for me even if I dislike anal 



Fenrari said:


> More power to you Kayze.
> 
> I don't have the guts to go that far at the moment... But that might just be me.


 It's hard to do, to discuss things with people that helped you in your life and prelife. To lay it on the line in hopes of not disappointing them, or feeling otherwise negative in their eyes. Many parents keep that unconditional love true, and it may take a long time, but they'll come to understand and accept it even if they do not understand it. If they don't, it does hurt. However, it's not the end all of things, in fact you can form new family. It's important to by yourself regardless. Not being yourself is not living your life. And life is too precious to not make it yours.

Also, about the thing I said of commenting about my Facebook entry tonight, it'll be hard :/ RL is always harder for you are unsure what to expect in terms of physical and emotional, instead of just emotional.


----------



## Cam (Aug 29, 2010)

*Re: I've done it :V*



Kayze said:


> I've known about my sexuality for around 3 years now, and was just sick  of white lies. My parents found out accidently, in a sense, and well, it  was quite a spill until they've come to the point where they brush it  under the rug. Sure, that can be seen as "at least they will still treat  you as their son" but to be there and just agree with them on jokes of  girlfriends and otherwise deny having one, just to please others, it's  BS. It's like, I'd rather them resent me than treat it like that.  Homosexuality s not a pressing issue, but that doesn't give the excuse  to just brush it under and not talk about it (in terms of having a  boyfriend, etc) and just lie to others.
> 
> I said that I was out of the closet already, which I was. But I sorta  went back on my word when I would lie about a girlfriend status (in the  sense of not having one 'yet', when I will never ). So, seeing that, I  got fed up with it. So it's either they accept it as an expectation  that I won't have a girlfriend and can love a man, and still know I'm  the same person. If they can't, that's more reason I shouldn't just lie  to be around them. I'm thinking of bringing up the Facebook thing  tonight, where i suppose my grandparents will know now. I'm still the  same guy, so if this is a problem then fuck you, essentially  family  is close, but cause of this lying, I've been hurting from it, so yeah,  it needs to be done.
> 
> ...


 
Yea, I never got around to tell my parents (or any of my family for that matter) about it.... Im not even sure how I would bring it up

Although I do believe that they got some clues.. i mean the major one being that i refuse to have kids and want a vesectomy :x
(Well and they are _well_ aware of my love for all things Madonna xD)

Im terrified of my dads reaction, to the point where i get nightmares about it...
I always got the feeling that he will just wanna disconnect from me for as long as possible, cause Im supposed to be the man of the family... _but what kind of 'real' man likes guys_

Being bi was always just kind of a personal thing to me, that I just kinda wanted to keep for myself and no one else to know

But now all my friends know and im open and even joke about it... it makes me so happy that even my ghetto friends can even be accepting of who i am... it really means alot to me

It also makes me glad to see someone like you come to terms with who your are and to not be afraid to show people who the fuck you really are! 

+100 respect points for you ^^


----------



## Asmiro (Aug 29, 2010)

Currently in the process of coming out to my father. Hoping he doesn't flip a lid. I don't know if it's a good thing that I wont be able to see his initial reaction.


----------



## <CaliforniaStripes> (Sep 3, 2010)

Uggh when i told my parents they first said they Love me but dont accept me. Then they said it was for attention/phase, and now they ignore me and tell me only that they pray to god that ill turn straight and they think it will wear off. So far in the 3 months after my love for my boyfriend has only gotten stronger. Take that prejudice praying parents i have foiled u again!


----------



## Sauvignon (Sep 3, 2010)

My closet doesn't even have a door. Guess I'll just stay in here.


----------



## kaithewolf (Sep 15, 2010)

i have recently started to notice guys but am not sure what to do about it.  how can i know for sure if i really do like guys?  how did everyone else figure out that they were gay?


----------



## Jude (Sep 15, 2010)

kaithewolf said:


> i have recently started to notice guys but am not sure what to do about it.  how can i know for sure if i really do like guys?  how did everyone else figure out that they were gay?


 
Fantasizing about guys, gay pr0nz, etc.
Once I get the balls to ask a guy out, I'll know for sure.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 15, 2010)

kaithewolf said:


> i have recently started to notice guys but am not sure what to do about it.  how can i know for sure if i really do like guys?  how did everyone else figure out that they were gay?


 
Nice first post. 

Also, I've been in your position before, when I started noticing guys I was very nervous and scared. 

Sounds pretty sure that you're Gay/Bi, but if you really aren't sure, y'know, porn and stuff, but checking out guys in RL provides a much more reliable answer, some guys just act much more cuter and sweeter than any guy in a porno could, y'know?


----------



## kaithewolf (Sep 15, 2010)

i feel like im bi but im not really sure 
i not sure if could ever figure out if a guy in real life is gay or not so i could try something.  is there a good way to figure out if someone is gay or not with out asking?


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 15, 2010)

kaithewolf said:


> i feel like im bi but im not really sure
> i not sure if could ever figure out if a guy in real life is gay or not so i could try something.  is there a good way to figure out if someone is gay or not with out asking?


 
Without asking? The only way I was able to do that was by flirting with them. Y'know, tell him how nice his hair is or how good he looks in his clothes and observe his reaction. Just don't make it too obvious, I made that mistake myself, thankfully he didn't decide to tell anyone else. 

Gays don't have much physical characteristics apart from straight people (There are, but they are small, not-so-noticeable things that may not necessarily %100 mean that they are Gay anyways.) so there's no way of actually telling unless you confront him in some way.


----------



## kaithewolf (Sep 15, 2010)

this whole thing is kind of confusing me and i dont know what to think
i feel like i should pursue this and find everything out but at the same time if i am im not sure what my friends will think of me,  i mean i haven't even told most of my friends about me being a furry for fear of what they will think any advice?


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 15, 2010)

kaithewolf said:


> this whole thing is kind of confusing me and i dont know what to think
> i feel like i should pursue this and find everything out but at the same time if i am im not sure what my friends will think of me,  i mean i haven't even told most of my friends about me being a furry for fear of what they will think any advice?


 
First of all, you should definitely explore it, y'know, find out what you truly like, I don't see why not.

Second of all, please, don't come out as a furry, it's silly and makes you look like a jackass. Furry's just a hobby, y'know, it's like coming out to your friends that you like building model airplanes. No need to tell them, no need for them to know, however, they should probably know that you might be Gay, especially if you have a boyfriend.


----------



## kaithewolf (Sep 15, 2010)

i have never heard anyone describe furry as a hobby but that does make a lot of sence.
i think i will explore it more
thanks for all of your help i will be posting on this again when i find something out


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 15, 2010)

kaithewolf said:


> i have never heard anyone describe furry as a hobby but that does make a lot of sence.
> i think i will explore it more
> thanks for all of your help i will be posting on this again when i find something out


 
No problem, if you ever feel like talking again, just post again here and we'll help.


----------



## itswhatido20 (Sep 15, 2010)

kaithewolf said:


> i have recently started to notice guys but am not sure what to do about it.  how can i know for sure if i really do like guys?  how did everyone else figure out that they were gay?


 
Kiss a guy


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 15, 2010)

itswhatido20 said:


> Kiss a guy


 
:I

This is the kinda advice I got when I came out to myself that left me confused, during that time I didn't even know how to approach a guy, let alone find out if he's Gay. Kai's a little nervous about approaching guys himself, so yeah, just telling him to kiss random guys doesn't help at all.


----------



## itswhatido20 (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> :I
> 
> This is the kinda advice I got when I came out to myself that left me confused, during that time I didn't even know how to approach a guy, let alone find out if he's Gay. Kai's a little nervous about approaching guys himself, so yeah, just telling him to kiss random guys doesn't help at all.


 
then he'll have to wait


----------



## Enwon (Sep 16, 2010)

I recently discovered that I'm homosexual.  And I have a question:

Should I come out?


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

Kiss me, I'm lonely :'(

Nah... I'll just wait till I'm able to approach a guy. Despite my physical appearance, I'm kinda picky for whatever reason. I need to either lower my standards or improve how I look, _or_ find a guy with low self esteem 

The second one most likely.

I know this really cute guy. I'm pretty sure he's gay, but even if he was, I doubt he would go out with me...

EDIT: Hard to believe a few years ago I was drooling over girls and the thought of being with a guy disgusted me.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

Enwon said:


> I recently discovered that I'm homosexual.  And I have a question:
> 
> Should I come out?


 
No, you don't have to, only when you have a boyfriend you should. Or if you have strict parents like mine who check on you every five minutes when you have a mate over, don't say a thing until they catch you in bed with him :V


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> don't say a thing until they catch you in bed with him :V


 
Totally this, that would be hilarious


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Totally this, that would be hilarious


 
Yeah, best way to come out. 

I might actually come out to them the same way, but if I get into an internet relationship, which is basically my last option now, I'll have to let them know :I 

Also, how come so many guys on here are turning Gay? What the Hell is this Phenomenon? Owait, yeah, FAF.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah, best way to come out.
> 
> I might actually come out to them the same way, but if I get into an internet relationship, which is basically my last option now, I'll have to let them know :I
> 
> Also, how come so many guys on here are turning Gay? What the Hell is this Phenomenon? Owait, yeah, FAF.



My family still dont know im bi :v

I dont exactly plan on telling them though... it would be a taaad awkward


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> My family still dont know im bi :v
> 
> I dont exactly plan on telling them though... it would be a taaad awkward


 
Same here with my family, they don't got a clue that I'm Gay since I'm into very manly-ish things. 

I don't plan on telling them either, unless I absolutely have to.


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> My family still dont know im bi :v
> 
> I dont exactly plan on telling them though... it would be a taaad awkward


 
At least you stopped at bi 
I'm going gay all the way at this point.

Damn, I _have_ to tell my parents eventually
You don't :\


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Same here with my family, they don't got a clue that I'm Gay since I'm into very manly-ish things.
> 
> I don't plan on telling them either, unless I absolutely have to.



Completely same... i get the same fucking reaction from everyone who I tell

Apparently in order to like the same sex you gotta be an oblivious flamer



DrumFur said:


> At least you stopped at bi



Im just greedy :v


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Completely same... i get the same fucking reaction from everyone who I tell
> 
> Apparently in order to like the same sex you gotta be an oblivious flamer


 
OMG definitely this. 

I tell my friend that I'm Gay, he tells me, "Pfft, you're not Gay, you're the straightest guy I know, I don't see you wearing makeup and dresses."


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> OMG definitely this.
> 
> I tell my friend that I'm Gay, he tells me, "Pfft, you're not Gay, you're the straightest guy I know, I don't see you wearing makeup and dresses."


 
I thought it was kinda obvious that I wasnt completely straight, since I hate sports and openly love lady gaga xD

But i forgot that because I wear normal clothing that it must mean im totally straight


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

People don't believe me :|
That's pretty damn frustrating.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> I thought it was kinda obvious that I wasnt completely straight, since I hate sports and openly love lady gaga xD
> 
> But i forgot that because I wear normal clothing that it must mean im totally straight


 
Yeah. 

Well hey, if your friend isn't convinced that you're Gay, kiss him hard.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> People don't believe me :|
> That's pretty damn frustrating.


 
Fuck them

If they dont believe then it sucks to be them

you can always just make out with a dude in front of them.... would definitely get the point across 


Darkwing said:


> Yeah.
> 
> Well hey, if your friend isn't convinced that you're Gay, kiss him hard.



A bit too late :X


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Fuck them
> 
> If they dont believe then it sucks to be them
> 
> you can always just make out with a dude in front of them.... would definitely get the point across



I would love to, just to show them up and to shock the hell out of my friends I haven't told.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> A bit too late :X


 
.... 

Hawt.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I would love to, just to show them up and to shock the hell out of my friends I haven't told.


 
Do it... ive done it before xD

But if you have thuggish friends, dont do that in front of them...

From my experience it isnt exactly too fun xD



Darkwing said:


> ....
> 
> Hawt.



Teeheehee


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Teeheehee


 
I would've kissed my friend just to convince him, but ehhh, he's not really kissable. 

It's fucked up though because he told me that he had Gay thoughts before, he just said that he repressed them and that apparently that keeps him straight, bullshit.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> I would've kissed my friend just to convince him, but ehhh, he's not really kissable.
> 
> It's fucked up though because he told me that he had Gay thoughts before, he just said that he repressed them and that apparently that keeps him straight, bullshit.



HAHA! Thats a good one

He's full of shit, hes just trying to push down his boner...

Hell realize soon that life doesnt work that way and hell be sporting the rainbows B)

And yea theres like no kissable guys within range for me ;~;


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> I would've kissed my friend just to convince him, but ehhh, he's not really kissable.
> 
> It's fucked up though because he told me that he had Gay thoughts before, he just said that he repressed them and that apparently that keeps him straight, bullshit.


 
Most of my friends aren't either, but the ones that are are the ones who are extremely straight, almost to the point of being homophobic.

Also, lot of straight guys have gay thoughts. It's almost human nature. Doesn't necessarily mean they're gay.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> HAHA! Thats a good one
> 
> He's full of shit, hes just trying to push down his boner...
> 
> Hell realize soon that life doesnt work that way and hell be sporting the rainbows B)


 
Yeah, I'm waiting for that. He will be proven wrong eventually. 



cmrnmrphy said:


> And yea theres like no kissable guys within range for me ;~;


 
Same here, actually there are a few, but I tried to hook up with all of them and whatnot, didn't work out well :'(  (Most of them are straight w/girlfriends)

My only option right now it seems is the internet, too many straight guys in my neighborhood, and the Gay ones are seriously in-denial and don't fit my standards.


----------



## 3picFox (Sep 16, 2010)

The only gay guys (or i suspect that they are gay, definitely act like it...) are annoying and generally smell bad.

:|


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah, I'm waiting for that. He will be proven wrong eventually.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



I have only successfully hooked up with one hot guy

Other than that nothing... I always get hit on by the creepers and the poor-hygiene crew :/



3picFox said:


> The only gay guys (or i suspect that they are gay, definitely act like it...) are annoying and generally smell bad.
> 
> :|


 
Yep same.... fuck life <_<


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> I have only successfully hooked up with one hot guy


 
Well at least you managed to hook up with somebody. 



cmrnmrphy said:


> Other than that nothing... I always get hit on by the creepers and the poor-hygiene crew :/


 
I never got hit on by another guy, it's usually me who does the flirting. 

I pretty much give up on my town, though.


----------



## 3picFox (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> I never got hit on by another guy, it's usually me who does the flirting.
> 
> I pretty much give up on my town, though.


 
I'm always to nervous/shy to flirt. I would fail at it if i tried, anyways.


----------



## Cell60k (Sep 16, 2010)

I've pretty much had to give up on guys, they normally can't tolerate the stuff i like, and vice versa.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

3picFox said:


> I'm always to nervous/shy to flirt. I would fail at it if i tried, anyways.


 
Dawwwwwwww 



Cell60k said:


> I've pretty much had to give up on guys, they normally can't tolerate the stuff i like, and vice versa.


 
Don't give up, keep looking, he's out there, I guarantee you that.

Trust me, you have no idea how many times I got dumped.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

I never hit on people... im always the one to get flirted with... apparently im attractive, but im still not convinced 




3picFox said:


> I'm always to nervous/shy to flirt. I would fail at it if i tried, anyways.



I probably would too if I actually did for once xD


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

I prefer quieter guys who are more kept to themselves.

That only makes it ten times harder to tell if they're gay!


----------



## Cell60k (Sep 16, 2010)

ah, but at this point im forced to for about 4 years, Military life sorta does that.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I prefer quieter guys who are more kept to themselves.
> 
> That only makes it ten times harder to tell if they're gay!


 
Yes

For some reason, shyness is probably my hugest turn on o_0

Cause underneath the shy is either a really deep minded person who is awesome to talk to... *or* the kinkiest motherfucker alive


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

Cell60k said:


> ah, but at this point im forced to for about 4 years, Military life sorta does that.


 
I see, I don't think they really enforce DADT anymore though. I've heard that there are plenty of openly-Gay dudes in the Military.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Yes
> 
> For some reason, shyness is probably my hugest turn on o_0
> 
> Cause underneath the shy is either a really deep minded person who is awesome to talk to... *or* the kinkiest motherfucker alive


 
This.


----------



## Cell60k (Sep 16, 2010)

They do at MEPS (a gauntlet of tests, HIV, Drugs, Etc.) and my Aunt tells me to just keep my mouth shut, safer that way.


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Yes
> 
> For some reason, shyness is probably my hugest turn on o_0
> 
> Cause underneath the shy is either a really deep minded person who is awesome to talk to... *or* the kinkiest motherfucker alive



Oh god, this x 100.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

Cell60k said:


> They do at MEPS (a gauntlet of tests, HIV, Drugs, Etc.) and my Aunt tells me to just keep my mouth shut, safer that way.


 
Oh, I see, well if you survive that then you should be alright.


----------



## Cell60k (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Oh, I see, well if you survive that then you should be alright.


 
already did, ^@.@^ it was horrible....>.> so many guys in boxers.....half of them not that bad to look at....XD but i passed it and it was all good.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Cell60k said:


> ^@.@^


 
Just what the fuck is that?



Cell60k said:


> so many guys in boxers.....half of them not that bad to look at....XD but i passed it and it was all good.


 
For some reason, I never found guys in only boxers hot... to me its either be fully clothed.. _or dont (;_


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

Cell60k said:


> already did, ^@.@^ it was horrible....>.> so many guys in boxers.....half of them not that bad to look at....XD but i passed it and it was all good.


 
Lolwut..... 

So they ACTUALLY test for homosexuality? How? xD


----------



## Cell60k (Sep 16, 2010)

not really, but there are parts where you have to get undressed down to your boxers with like 14 other guys, then like bend over, jump around, wave your arms in circles....etc....so i guess....you strike a boner you lose? i dunno XD


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

Cell60k said:


> not really, but there are parts where you have to get undressed down to your boxers with like 14 other guys, then like bend over, jump around, wave your arms in circles....etc....so i guess....you strike a boner you lose? i dunno XD


 
Wow, that's weird. Never heard about that test, and I talked to a lot of guys in the military. 

Guys in boxers are hot though, especially black boxers, I'd most definitely fail that test because of my high sex drive. But considering that I'm in 10th grade, DADT will probably be repealed before I go into the military (It's one of the careers I've been considering, honestly, but there are many others I've been considering as well)


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Cell60k said:


> not really, but there are parts where you have to get undressed down to your boxers with like 14 other guys, then like bend over, jump around, wave your arms in circles....etc....so i guess....you strike a boner you lose? i dunno XD


 
Thats gay... kinda literally XD


----------



## 3picFox (Sep 16, 2010)

Cell60k said:


> not really, but there are parts where you have to get undressed down to your boxers with like 14 other guys, then like *bend over*, jump around, wave your arms in circles....etc....so i guess....you strike a boner you lose? i dunno XD


 
i'd lose


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

Fuck, I'd lose too.
I lose even in my gym locker room, and everyone there is just minding their own business.

Boxers are hot :3


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

What the fuck everyone thinks boxers are hot but me

Ill just go back to my corner now


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Fuck, I'd lose too.
> I lose even in my gym locker room, and everyone there is just minding their own business.
> 
> Boxers are hot :3


 
Oh God, I try not to look around in the locker room, I just look down at the tiles or on my own locker. My school is extremely homophobic, whenever someone's looking around the locker room everyone's all like "You fucking queer!" 

Yeeah >.>


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Oh God, I try not to look around in the locker room, I just look down at the tiles or on my own locker. My school is extremely homophobic, whenever someone's looking around the locker room everyone's all like "You fucking queer!"
> 
> Yeeah >.>



Ours too...

My entire high school is basically homophobic tools screaming BURR everywhere


----------



## 3picFox (Sep 16, 2010)

I don't necessarily think boxers are hot, its just the thoughts that get me.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Ours too...
> 
> My entire high school is basically homophobic tools screaming BURR everywhere


 
Yeah. 

If your school has a Gay-straight alliance, I consider you very lucky.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah.
> 
> If your school has a Gay-straight alliance, I consider you very lucky.


 
Oh we do, I joined for a day then quit

It was basically all the flamers moaning and bitching about very little thing


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah.
> 
> If your school has a Gay-straight alliance, I consider you very lucky.



Mine does. I'm gonna try to make it next time they meet up. There's a LOT of people that belong to it.
My school is pretty accepting of LGTB people. There are a lot of lesbians at my school for some reason.



cmrnmrphy said:


> Oh we do, I joined for a day then quit
> 
> It was basically all the flamers moaning and bitching about very little thing



Exactly what I'm afraid of. It's worth a try.
Last year, the leader of it was one of the most awesome people you would ever meet. I've heard it's a lot worse now that he's off to college. I was gonna come out to him and talk to him about it, but I still wasn't sure at the time.

He was a flamer, but he was still awesome to talk to and always took charge of things.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Oh we do, I joined for a day then quit
> 
> It was basically all the flamers moaning and bitching about very little thing


 
Ohh, yeah, I heard that's how Gay-straight alliances are usually like.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Mine does. I'm gonna try to make it next time they meet up. There's a LOT of people that belong to it.
> My school is pretty accepting of LGTB people. There are a lot of lesbians at my school for some reason.


 
Of course there's a lot of lesbians, mainly because lesbians are more accepted than Gay guys, you have no idea how many Gay guys repress themselves, I have repressed myself for about 1-2 years until I had this dream about..... Yeah...


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Mine does. I'm gonna try to make it next time they meet up. There's a LOT of people that belong to it.
> My school is pretty accepting of LGTB people. There are a lot of lesbians at my school for some reason.
> 
> 
> ...



I love talking to people like that...

Im usually the leader of alot of the musical shows at my school, nothing more...

But yea GSA was.... gay


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Of course there's a lot of lesbians, mainly because lesbians are more accepted than Gay guys, you have no idea how many Gay guys repress themselves, I have repressed myself for about 1-2 years until I had this dream about..... Yeah...


 
Yeah, I understand. I started getting these thoughts when I was like 13 and hated myself for them.
I still repress myself to a certain extent.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

I repressed myself for like 7 years XD

Until i realized im down with being B)


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Yeah, I understand. I started getting these thoughts when I was like 13 and hated myself for them.
> I still repress myself to a certain extent.


 
Yeah, about a month after I turned 13 I started getting dreams and began secretly fantasizing about guys, being in denial of course I ignored it. After a year or two of being in denial, I had this one dream, it just threw me off, it was a very obvious subconscious message that I was not straight, so I went by it and called myself bi, then eventually Gay because girls didn't appeal to me as much as guys did.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah, about a month after I turned 13 I started getting dreams and began secretly fantasizing about guys, being in denial of course I ignored it. After a year or two of being in denial, I had this one dream, it just threw me off, it was a very obvious subconscious message that I was not straight, so I went by it and called myself bi, then eventually Gay because girls didn't appeal to me as much as guys did.


 
I think I realized I was bi when I managed to have sex with a guy :c


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> I think I realized I was bi when I managed to have sex with a guy :c


 
Yeah. 

I remembered how I felt when I realized that I was Gay, it was like, a huge slam in the face, before I was 13 I never expected myself, nor saw myself being with a man, I expected to see myself with a woman like in movies and stuff. It was very unexpected, but I happily accept myself now, the problem now is finding another guy though >.<


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> but I happily accept myself now, the problem now is finding another guy though >.<



Its not hard for me to find a cute guy, but the thing that gets me is the fact I value personality over looks, and most of them are just fake as shit ><


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Its not hard for me to find a cute guy, but the thing that gets me is the fact I value personality over looks, and most of them are just fake as shit ><


 
My standards were actually a little high, lowering them a little now, seeing who I can catch. 

And yes, personality is a very big aspect in a guy, I agree with you.


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

I still can't really say I'm fully gay yet. I used to fantasize about women, and crush on them. At this point, I'm just doing the same, but with guys.

I can tolerate straight porn and stuff.
Vaginas don't gross me out or anything.

But... it's just boring at this point, and I'd much rather be looking at gay stuff online.


----------



## Cam (Sep 16, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> My standards were actually a little high, lowering them a little now, seeing who I can catch.
> 
> And yes, personality is a very big aspect in a guy, I agree with you.



That will probably work, just make sure you can really like the guy you wanna go after :3




DrumFur said:


> I still can't really say I'm fully gay yet. I used to fantasize about women, and crush on them. At this point, I'm just doing the same, but with guys.
> 
> I can tolerate straight porn and stuff.
> Vaginas don't gross me out or anything.
> ...


 
And thats what the furry fandom does to people...

_corruption_


----------



## Jude (Sep 16, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> And thats what the furry fandom does to people...
> 
> _corruption_


 
lol I would agree, but the fandom doesn't really have anything do do with it at this point. It just sparked the initial curiosity.


----------



## itswhatido20 (Sep 17, 2010)

Cuz furry males seem more interesting than females? =P


----------



## Jude (Sep 17, 2010)

itswhatido20 said:


> Cuz furry males seem more interesting than females? =P


 
lol, yeah. Even when I considered myself straight I was interested in furry males. I didn't consider myself bi or gay until I started noticing guys IRL.


----------



## itswhatido20 (Sep 17, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> lol, yeah. Even when I considered myself straight I was interested in furry males. I didn't consider myself bi or gay until I started noticing guys IRL.


 
Yea I was kinda the same, furry just made me realize it more... But I'm bi, I still like women, I just don't trust them anymore.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 17, 2010)

itswhatido20 said:


> I still like women, I just don't trust them anymore.


 
How come?


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> lol I would agree, but the fandom doesn't really have anything do do with it at this point. It just sparked the initial curiosity.



XD I think the fandom plays 40% of the role in turning me bi


----------



## itswhatido20 (Sep 17, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> How come?


 
Too many lies, backstabbings, and cheating.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 17, 2010)

itswhatido20 said:


> Too many lies, backstabbings, and cheating.


 
Doesn't necessarily mean all girls are like that :I 

If you're Gay just because of that, you really need to get some sense knocked into you. Guys can be just as bad.


----------



## itswhatido20 (Sep 17, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Doesn't necessarily mean all girls are like that :I
> 
> If you're Gay just because of that, you really need to get some sense knocked into you. Guys can be just as bad.


 
I'm bi, but thats only partial reasoning... and yes, a lot of men I meet are like that too


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 17, 2010)

itswhatido20 said:


> I'm bi, but thats only partial reasoning... and yes, a lot of men I meet are like that too


 
Oh, I see, but still, nothing against you, but I hate Gay/Bi guys who hate women because they got dumped by them a few times. It's like, grow a damn backbone and move on, y'know?


----------



## CinnamonApples (Sep 17, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> And thats what the furry fandom does to people...
> 
> _corruption_



See, furry pr0n had initially made me question if I was actually gay. Then I realized that not being attracted to animal men is not the same as not being attracted to real-people men. Silly ninth-grade me! :roll:


----------



## itswhatido20 (Sep 17, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Oh, I see, but still, nothing against you, but I hate Gay/Bi guys who hate women because they got dumped by them a few times. It's like, grow a damn backbone and move on, y'know?


 
I really couldnt care bout losin a girl, but there was one situation I don't like to talk about that actually made me question my sexuality.


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

CinnamonApples said:


> See, furry pr0n had initially made me question if I was actually gay. Then I realized that not being attracted to animal men is not the same as not being attracted to real-people men. Silly ninth-grade me! :roll:


 
It just made me realize that I could dig dicks xD


----------



## CinnamonApples (Sep 17, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> It just made me realize that I could dig dicks xD


 
I think I was more distracted by all of the fur and animal-ish anatomy to notice the actual dick.


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

CinnamonApples said:


> I think I was more distracted by all of the fur and animal-ish anatomy to notice the actual dick.


 
Oh i feel so normal now :v


----------



## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Sep 17, 2010)

CinnamonApples said:


> See, furry pr0n had initially made me question if I was actually gay. Then I realized that not being attracted to animal men is not the same as not being attracted to real-people men. Silly ninth-grade me! :roll:


 
Take away the hands, footpaws, tail and head and you got yourself a smoking hot body. Yiff will always be comical because of that.


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs said:


> Take away the hands, footpaws, tail and head and you got yourself a smoking hot body. Yiff will always be comical because of that.


 
Thats basically a furry pillow with a hole :v


----------



## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Sep 17, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Thats basically a furry pillow with a hole :v


 
But doesn't it have a rockin' ass?


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs said:


> But doesn't it have a rockin' ass?



Maybe the ass my avi likes :v


----------



## Lyoto (Sep 17, 2010)

Hey everyone.

I've not been here long as you can probably see.  But being on here has lead me to something I thought I would never do.

I admitted to my best friend that I am bisexual.  I've been best friends with the guy for years.  I'm not sexually attracted to him but the funny thing is I have long suspected he himself was gay or at least bi and I was expecting him to come out too, but he didn't.  I was quite drunk at the time and he seemed to take it very lightly but maybe he just thought I was wasted and didn't want to say anything.  

I really don't think he'll care anyway, we've been friends that long it would take something more than that to separate us.

I'm still a little buzzed from drinking so I might regret this tomorrow.

I hadn't planned on telling him but we were looking for somewhere to go and the club we picked just so happened to be having a gay night.  It was your stereotypical gay night with the music that I hate and the way way way overly gay guys that I just don't like.  I decided I didn't want to go in any more after hearing the music coming from inside, which believe it or not was actually "Its Raining Men" (very stereotypical I know).  Then a guy in drag walked out in a very badly fitting wig, horrible make up etc. etc. etc.  At which point I told my friend we were going somewhere else.  

My friend is quite open minded and he thought I was being homophobic.  Before I knew what I was saying, I told him that I was Bi.

He was a bit silent for a while but then he started joking around like we always do.  

Not sure how he has taken it.

I'm still not entirely sure if he took me there knowing it was a gay night and just wanted to see my reaction.  I've done nothing to say I was gay or bi and no one would think to look at me but as I said for a long time I've thought he maybe was and was too scared to say anything.  I have never been with a guy and I find it hard to find anyone because I am way more picky with guys than I am girls and because of the way I look and act no one would suspect I was bi.

Anyone going through anything similar.  Bit of a long shot I know, but you never know.


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

Lyoto said:


> Hey everyone.
> 
> I've not been here long as you can probably see.  But being on here has lead me to something I thought I would never do.
> 
> ...



Thats quite interesting...

I totally get you with the whole club scene... totally flamer dudes are such a turn off..

Anyways.. I remember when before I came out as bi, I never told any of my friends because I never would of thought they would accept me...

But somehow when the word got out, it turned out it really wasnt a big deal


----------



## Jude (Sep 17, 2010)

I told a few friends, and I got the same sort of reaction. They were quiet at first, then everything got back to normal. Not, for whatever reason, one of my friends can't have a freaking conversation without the whole gay thing coming up when I talk to him. He jokes about gayness _and_ furries way too much. He forgets a lot that my parents don't know about that shit, and I've had a few close calls. I hope my parents don't google "yiff" and "furfag", considering those account for 15% of all the words that they hear coming out of his mouth when he's over.


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I hope my parents don't google "yiff" and "furfag", considering those account for 15% of all the words that they hear coming out of his mouth when he's over.



And thats why I dont let anyone know im a furry xD


----------



## Fenrari (Sep 17, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> He jokes about gayness _and_ furries way too much. He forgets a lot that my parents don't know about that shit, and I've had a few close calls. I hope my parents don't google "yiff" and "furfag", considering those account for 15% of all the words that they hear coming out of his mouth when he's over.


 
Tell him to stop. If he's really your friend he will. Some people don't understand the concept of limits. You might need to show him that it's making you uncomfortable.


----------



## Jude (Sep 17, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> Tell him to stop. If he's really your friend he will. Some people don't understand the concept of limits. You might need to show him that it's making you uncomfortable.


 
Thanks for the advice

Yeah, I better. I've already told him to keep the gay/furry talk down around my parents, and he keeps on "forgetting". Perhaps I need to make myself more clear.


----------



## Cam (Sep 17, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Perhaps I need to make myself more clear.



Nothing says _STFU_ like a good kick in the throat


----------



## Fenrari (Sep 18, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Thanks for the advice
> 
> Yeah, I better. I've already told him to keep the gay/furry talk down around my parents, and he keeps on "forgetting". Perhaps I need to make myself more clear.


 
Trust me, some people need to be shown that they can't walk all over you. He sounds like the type of person who would do that given the chance.


----------



## Jude (Sep 18, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> Trust me, some people need to be shown that they can't walk all over you. He sounds like the type of person who would do that given the chance.


 
Eh, I might have made him sound more douchey than he actually is. He just doesn't realize what he's saying a lot of the time.

He makes rides home from school awkward.

My friend - You know, Casey, Julian's xbox bio is complete satire. It says "Yiff in hell furfags" even though he is indeed a furfag
Me (trying to change the subject) - Okay, what are we do about...
My friend - Not all furries are gay, right?
Me - No...
My friend - EXACTLY, why do you have to ashamed about being a furry?
My mom - Uh, what?
Me - Nevermind, mom.

He goes on to mention things like fursuiting during the talent show, stereotypes for different species, etc...

Just moments like that where he doesn't realize he's being both oblivious and ignorant.


----------



## Lyoto (Sep 18, 2010)

Thanks everyone.  Nice to know I'm not totally insane.

I haven't said anything about the furry stuff yet.  That's a conversation that's best kept for another day.

I'm probably gonna have to reinforce the whole Bi thing the next time we meet as I was and still am a bit drunk and he might have thought I was just rambling or something.  Much like I am now. lol.  

I'm probably gonna wake up tomorrow screaming "oh my god what have I done" but something tells me I won't.  Its one thing telling people you have never met online but telling my best friend was a big jump.

Hope I haven't Effed things up.

He's just about the only real friend I have.  

No idea when or if I'll be ready to tell my sister or my parents.  Probably wait and see if any relationships with guys materialise before saying anything.
My sister would prob love it.  She has always told me about she wished I was gay.  Don't know if that's weird or not.

I'm still not sure about how to go about getting guys works but I guess letting your friends know is the first step.

Here goes ... well everything!


----------



## 3picFox (Sep 18, 2010)

CinnamonApples said:


> See, furry pr0n had initially made me question if I was actually gay. Then I realized that not being attracted to animal men is not the same as not being attracted to real-people men. Silly ninth-grade me! :roll:



*late response incoming*

I used to feel the same way, that i'm only attracted to furry males, etc etc. But, through a long period of certain things happening i realized that i'm not attracted to all guys, just ones that have certain characteristics, personalities, and physical features. I later realized that about girls too. I can't really get off to some guy just because he's hot, cute, or attractive, its only certain things that can do that for me. Again, same with girls.

So yeah, basic story of why I am what I am.


----------



## Fenrari (Sep 18, 2010)

@Lyoto - If he's really as a good a friend as you know him to be. He'll accept you for who you are. it was really hard to come out to my friends as well, but the trust that you're fostering by admitting such things is incredibly valuable.


----------



## Citrakayah (Sep 18, 2010)

Fenrari said:


> @Lyoto - If he's really as a good a friend as you know him to be. He'll accept you for who you are. it was really hard to come out to my friends as well, but the trust that you're fostering by admitting such things is incredibly valuable.


Just make sure your not telling the wrong people when you do. Or that the friend you tell respects you enough not to go on blabbing about it.

I made the mistake of telling my best friend and a not so good friend at the same time. My best friend accepted and the other guy constantly gives me shit about it and spreads it around like a bad virus. 

Just be careful with who you tell, if you don't want to be very open about it.


----------



## 00vapour (Sep 18, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> ...I dont let anyone know im a furry xD



200% good advice. As tempting as it is to show some of my friends the art I've toiled over, it's just not worth attaining that stigma. Although having a furry friend in RL would be 5 gazillion% awesome


----------



## Cam (Sep 18, 2010)

00vapour said:


> Although having a furry friend in RL would be 5 gazillion% awesome



That it would, I know some fursuiters... but i dont like to be with them cause they are kinda weird and smelly ._.


----------



## Lyoto (Sep 18, 2010)

Thanks for the advice everyone.

I'm a bit apprehensive about meeting him again.  Hope its not too awkward.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

Lyoto said:


> Thanks for the advice everyone.
> 
> I'm a bit apprehensive about meeting him again.  Hope its not too awkward.


 
He probably won't talk about it. 

I remember coming out to my best friend, extremely awkward, but we never spoke about it again after that. He does put little discreet hints when we are out in public, though, he often calls me "fag" and all that, kinda like he's reminding me that he knows about it.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> He probably won't talk about it.
> 
> I remember coming out to my best friend, extremely awkward, but we never spoke about it again after that. He does put little discreet hints when we are out in public, though, he often calls me "fag" and all that, kinda like he's reminding me that he knows about it.



My friends ALWAYS rash on me for coming out ahah

The first thing my best friend told me after I came out was

"So do you get offended hen I say 'fag'? "

I'd rather my friends pick on me for it... cause I really dont mind it at all.. its fun to make fun of


----------



## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

I came out when I was 16 after I broke up with my childhood sweetheart.   She wanted to do things and I didn't, and then I met Sam.  Great friend  of mine for a while, until he told me he was gay.  Well I told him I was  thinking I might be the same, and so things just kinda went from  there.  I cheated on my current girlfriend and so I told her  everything.  She hasn't spoken to me since and quite frankly I don't  give a flip.  Mom asked me what happened though so I told her everything  as well. I got the bible thrown at me, and that's when I was homeless for a while.  Eventually I moved back in, so long as I promised my parents I'd work on not being gay with Jesus.  Not too long after that I became atheist, although I still haven't told my folk that one. 

Anyway, now everyone knows.  If people ask, I don't hesitate.  When friends asked I told them.  It wasn't a big deal; anyone who didn't like it didn't talk to me which was right by me.  Leave me alone, I'll leave you alone.  I have gotten in someone's face for calling me a fag though, after that none of my friends used that word lightly again.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> I came out when I was 16 after I broke up with my childhood sweetheart.   She wanted to do things and I didn't, and then I met Sam.  Great friend  of mine for a while, *until I told me he was gay*.


 
I stopped there. 

Work on your grammar first newfag.


----------



## Jude (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> I came out when I was 16 after I broke up with my childhood sweetheart.   She wanted to do things and I didn't, and then I met Sam.  Great friend  of mine for a while, until I told me he was gay.  Well I told him I was  thinking I might be the same, and so things just kinda went from  there.  I cheated on my current girlfriend and so I told her  everything.  She hasn't spoken to me since and quite frankly I don't  give a flip.  Mom asked me what happened though so I told her everything  as well. I got the bible thrown at me, and that's when I was homeless for a while.  Eventually I moved back in, so long as I promised my parents I'd work on not being gay with Jesus.  Not too long after that I became atheist, although I still haven't told my folk that one.
> 
> Anyway, now everyone knows.  If people ask, I don't hesitate.  When friends asked I told them.  It wasn't a big deal; anyone who didn't like it didn't talk to me which was right by me.  Leave me alone, I'll leave you alone.  I have gotten in someone's face for calling me a fag though, after that none of my friends used that word lightly again.


 
Ah... posts like this make me feel selfish about not coming out. My parents will disown me, but not throw a bible at my face and kick me out.

Sorry to hear all of that, I hope everything works out for you in the end.


----------



## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> I stopped there.
> 
> Work on your grammar first newfag.


Sorry


DrumFur said:


> Ah... posts like this make me feel selfish about not coming out. My parents will disown me, but not throw a bible at my face and kick me out.
> 
> Sorry to hear all of that, I hope everything works out for you in the end.


 Well I mean now we just don't talk about it.  Momma loves me just like she did before but my brother and father don't even like me being in the house.  Oh well, I'm out on my own now.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> my brother and father don't even like me being in the house.


 
That is straight up fucked...

Like it pisses me off that people can even reach this level of homophobia...

It really matters _that_ much what gender someone likes?

Im gonna stop now before I begin ranting


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Sep 19, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> That is straight up fucked...
> 
> Like it pisses me off that people can even reach this level of homophobia...
> 
> ...



People fear anything that is not considered "Normal" by every day standards.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> People fear anything that is not considered "Normal" by every day standards.



Im quite aware... buts its just weird because the community I grew up in is very tolerable... so it pisses me off to see that other places are just so insecure about this

Normal is a setting on a washing machine :v


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> Well I mean now we just don't talk about it.  Momma loves me just like she did before but my brother and father don't even like me being in the house.  Oh well, I'm out on my own now.


 
Oh, wow, that really sucks. 

Your mom should really stand up for you or something, though.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> You should really stand up for yourself or something, though.


 
Fixed


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Fixed


 
Oh, and yeah, that too of course.


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Sep 19, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Im quite aware... buts its just weird because the community I grew up in is very tolerable... so it pisses me off to see that other places are just so insecure about this
> 
> Normal is a setting on a washing machine :v



Different communities tend to view things differently. They also tend to do things differently aswell. Gay people seem to be tolerated quite well over here.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Oh, and yeah, that too of course.



Derp xD

You should show them that if you are truly gay (or bi... or pan... or whatever fucking else is there because you didnt specify :v) and you  are proud of who you are.. then your not gonna take shit from not only your relatives.... but from anyone


----------



## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

Doesn't come close to what my brother did when I first came out though.

And I do stand up for myself, thank you.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

._.

I really dont understand how come communities get to this kind of point


----------



## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

Eh what the fuck I told him I wouldn't tell anyone but he won't read this forum anyway.

I was coming home from work a few days after I came out and it was dark,  really late at night.  All the lights were off for some reason but I  got out of the car and noticed a dark figure in the driveway.  He didn't  speak but I figured it was my brother, but soon after that he rushed at  me with a baseball bat--with nails in it.  I escaped unharmed because I  can run faster than him, but that is how angry he was at me when I came  out of the closet.


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> Eh what the fuck I told him I wouldn't tell anyone but he won't read this forum anyway.
> 
> I was coming home from work a few days after I came out and it was dark,  really late at night.  All the lights were off for some reason but I  got out of the car and noticed a dark figure in the driveway.  He didn't  speak but I figured it was my brother, but soon after that he rushed at  me with a baseball bat--with nails in it.  I escaped unharmed because I  can run faster than him, but that is how angry he was at me when I came  out of the closet.



What a nice brother you have.



cmrnmrphy said:


> ._.
> 
> I really dont understand how come communities get to this kind of point



Some people don't have a mind of their own. for example if a person, or a couple in a community are highly respected and they have views against being gay, then they are likely to have a heard of sheep following them. bit like how religion works really, people play "follow the leader".


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> Eh what the fuck I told him I wouldn't tell anyone but he won't read this forum anyway.
> 
> I was coming home from work a few days after I came out and it was dark,  really late at night.  All the lights were off for some reason but I  got out of the car and noticed a dark figure in the driveway.  He didn't  speak but I figured it was my brother, but soon after that he rushed at  me with a baseball bat--with nails in it.  I escaped unharmed because I  can run faster than him, but that is how angry he was at me when I came  out of the closet.


 
Whoa, holy shit, scary. 

Did you know he was your brother? Did you call the cops?


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> Some people don't have a mind of their own. for example if a person, or a couple in a community are highly respected and they have views against being gay, then they are likely to have a heard of sheep following them. bit like how religion works really, people play "follow the leader".


 
Weird that you mention that because I do notice that in peoples social behaviours... for some reason never really even thought that the concept could even play a role in a larger field such as this


Also where the fuck did your brother happen to find a bat with nails in it


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Sep 19, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Weird that you mention that because I do notice that in peoples social behaviours... for some reason never really even thought that the concept could even play a role in a larger field such as this
> 
> 
> Also where the fuck did your brother happen to find a bat with nails in it



His brother probably put the nails in it.

Chavs tend to follow a leader. And you will never be able to fight a chav one on one because they will always fight in groups. People have been killed here because they have confronted a group of chavs, so the police will always tell you never to confront the little pricks.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> His brother probably put the nails in it.


 
Im assuming that, but I wanna know if his brother actually made it, or found it

Cause if he made it.. then that means he PLANNED on fucking smashing his brother with nails

But he also coulda just looked for the nearest weapon to use and just so happen to get a hold of such a thing


The more and more I post about this story the more weirder it gets to me o_0


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Sep 19, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Im assuming that, but I wanna know if his brother actually made it, or found it
> 
> Cause if he made it.. then that means he PLANNED on fucking smashing his brother with nails
> 
> ...



This could be a new reality TV show, you may have heard of a show called "When good pets go bad" In his case it would be "When siblings go bad"


----------



## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Whoa, holy shit, scary.
> 
> Did you know he was your brother? Did you call the cops?


Yes, it was my brother, I knew it was him when it start screaming "get out fag."  Of course I didn't call the cops man, he's my brother. 


cmrnmrphy said:


> Also where the fuck did your brother happen to find a bat with nails in it


Louisiana slugger + fence nails + hammer.  I'm actually the one that made it, we use to dick around making stupid stuff like that to build an arsenal of "badass" weapons.


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## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> This could be a new reality TV show, you may have heard of a show called "When good pets go bad" In his case it would be "When siblings go bad"


 
Or have it be like a game show

How long can a sexually confused teenager survive in a Missouri small town?


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> Yes, it was my brother, I knew it was him when it start screaming "get out fag."  Of course I didn't call the cops man, he's my brother.


 
You really should've called the cops on him. 

I mean, I know brothers and other siblings usually beat on each other for fun and stuff, but when you are starting to hit each other using bats with nails on them, that's quite a bit outta line there.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> You really should've called the cops on him.
> 
> I mean, I know brothers and other siblings usually beat on each other for fun and stuff, but when you are starting to hit each other using bats with nails on them, that's quite a bit outta line there.


 
Yea this

Especially with a bat with fucking nails in it.. thats an "oh ney ney" according to John Pinette


----------



## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> You really should've called the cops on him.
> 
> I mean, I know brothers and other siblings usually beat on each other for fun and stuff, but when you are starting to hit each other using bats with nails on them, that's quite a bit outta line there.


I know... but I don't want to see my brother go to jail even if he did try to hurt me.  I thought about it but I just couldn't do it.  He apologized later and asked me not to tell anyone, so I never did.  I forgave him.   

It still hurts though to know he hates me that much.


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## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

Thats bad

You should try and talk to him? See what pisses him off so much at the fact that you are gay or whatnot...

But if you dont feel safe around him I wouldnt suggest getting near him at ANY time


----------



## DragonicWolf (Sep 19, 2010)

Oh gosh... this reminds me of the fact that in Malaysia, where I lived pretty much my entire life, being gay is illegal.  Crossdressing is illegal too. There have been raids on houses because of the suspicion of gay/crossdressing communities gathering. I think it is really sad, and one of my friends who is still living there is terribly depressed because of it. (he is gay)

Prolly off topic a little but I told my mum one day that I was asexual . She was dissapoint.


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## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

Tried to talk with him, he just said that if I want to go to hell he doesn't care anymore.  I just shouldn't bring demonic forces into the family house by being gay.

Yes he actually told me that.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> Tried to talk with him, he just said that if I want to go to hell he doesn't care anymore.  I just shouldn't bring demonic forces into the family house by being gay.
> 
> Yes he actually told me that.


 
Wow, I feel really sorry for you man  

You shouldn't be staying in that kinda environment, if I were you, I'd move in with a good friend or something.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

Cahawba said:


> Tried to talk with him, he just said that if I want to go to hell he doesn't care anymore.  I just shouldn't bring demonic forces into the family house by being gay.
> 
> Yes he actually told me that.


 
._.

Yea, as soon as I came out of the closet, I invited some demons over to chill and have buttsex

Really... how does this even go through peoples thoughts?


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 19, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> ._.
> 
> Yea, as soon as I came out of the closet, I invited some demons over to chill and have buttsex
> 
> Really... how does this even go through peoples thoughts?


 
Mostly anti-Gay Church Pastors, and homophobes in general.


----------



## Jude (Sep 19, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Mostly *anti-Gay Church Pastors*, and homophobes in general.


 
This is pretty much the epitome of hypocrisy.


----------



## Cahawba (Sep 19, 2010)

Southern Christian churches can get really wacko man, you have no idea.  I live by myself now though, so at least I am away from them.


----------



## Cam (Sep 19, 2010)

GOOD! Stay away from them...

Could work or not, I really dont know... but if it keeps you safe then go for it


----------



## Jude (Sep 25, 2010)

My mom might have accidentally found out.

I was talking to my friend on Xbox Live about furries and liking guys and all, and my mom is acting different towards me. She comes up to me every so often and asks "Are you completely sure there is nothing you want to talk about?", acting all concerned and shit. Perhaps she has overheard me. I'm not sure if I should tell her or not at this point. I'm still deciding between bi and gay (most likely bi with male preference), and I want to be sure, but it's killing me to pretend like everything's okay. She also might be concerned for another reason, and I don't want to accidentally come out.

My mom is concerned, but my dad is the type of person that call gays "cocksucking faggots" from time to time. Fuck, man.

EDIT: Post # HOT, HOT, HOT! Cool


----------



## Cam (Sep 25, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> My mom might have accidentally found out.
> 
> I was talking to my friend on Xbox Live about furries and liking guys and all, and my mom is acting different towards me. She comes up to me every so often and asks "Are you completely sure there is nothing you want to talk about?", acting all concerned and shit. Perhaps she has overheard me. I'm not sure if I should tell her or not at this point. I'm still deciding between bi and gay (most likely bi with male preference), and I want to be sure, but it's killing me to pretend like everything's okay. She also might be concerned for another reason, and I don't want to accidentally come out.
> 
> ...


 

Lolwoops

You should probably tell her... that is if you can easily determine her reaction

I never got to tell my mom but my dad still doesnt know... but has the same views as your father 

I would never tell him :V


----------



## Jude (Sep 25, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Lolwoops
> 
> You should probably tell her... that is if you can easily determine her reaction
> 
> ...



I'm actually not worried about telling my mom, I'm pretty sure she'd be cool with it. I know for a fact though that she'll tell my dad, and they will call up any immediate or distant family member and tell them, and everyone will know me as that "gay cousin".


----------



## Cam (Sep 26, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I'm actually not worried about telling my mom, I'm pretty sure she'd be cool with it. I know for a fact though that she'll tell my dad, and they will call up any immediate or distant family member and tell them, and everyone will know me as that "gay cousin".


I

Yea thats exactly what my dad would do

I would love to be known as the gay one... I could play mindfucks all day at the reunions and whatnot :V


----------



## Jude (Sep 26, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> I
> 
> Yea thats exactly what my dad would do
> 
> I would love to be known as the gay one... I could play mindfucks all day at the reunions and whatnot :V


 
I wouldn't want them to know, I'd like them to just kind of assume it so they're not too surprised when I tell them.

Which sucks because I dislike gay culture for the most part. Maybe I'll just say I'm bi (which I very well might be) and give them the argument "hey, I'm the same guy, I'm just more compatible" or something like that.

Also, kinda off-topic (but still kinda on-topic at the same time): I attended my school's GSA. There were 15 butch lesbians there flirting and talking about events for homecoming. If there was ever a place I really felt I was out of place, that would be it. I just really sat awkwardly at the back of the room not talking to anybody.


----------



## 8-bit (Sep 26, 2010)

My little sister (6 yrs) said I liked guys....... at the dinner table. I had to play that off better than Keyboard Cat. My dad is homophobic and almost shat a grenade when he found out I had gay sex.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 26, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> My mom might have accidentally found out.
> 
> I was talking to my friend on Xbox Live about furries and liking guys and all, and my mom is acting different towards me. She comes up to me every so often and asks "Are you completely sure there is nothing you want to talk about?", acting all concerned and shit. Perhaps she has overheard me. I'm not sure if I should tell her or not at this point. I'm still deciding between bi and gay (most likely bi with male preference), and I want to be sure, but it's killing me to pretend like everything's okay. She also might be concerned for another reason, and I don't want to accidentally come out.
> 
> My mom is concerned, but my dad is the type of person that call gays "cocksucking faggots" from time to time. Fuck, man.



Yeah, that's why I only talk about Gay stuff on instant messengers and shit, so that my parents + siblings won't overhear the conversation xS 



DrumFur said:


> I'm actually not worried about telling my mom, I'm pretty sure she'd be cool with it. I know for a fact though that she'll tell my dad, and they will call up any immediate or distant family member and tell them, and everyone will know me as that "gay cousin".


 
Oh God, that's exactly what my parents would do. 



DrumFur said:


> I wouldn't want them to know, I'd like them to just kind of assume it so they're not too surprised when I tell them.
> 
> Which sucks because I dislike gay culture for the most part. Maybe I'll just say I'm bi (which I very well might be) and give them the argument "hey, I'm the same guy, I'm just more compatible" or something like that.
> 
> Also, kinda off-topic (but still kinda on-topic at the same time): I attended my school's GSA. There were 15 butch lesbians there flirting and talking about events for homecoming. If there was ever a place I really felt I was out of place, that would be it. I just really sat awkwardly at the back of the room not talking to anybody.


 
Oh God, yeah, I don't really like the Gay culture at all either, especially the stereotypes affiliated with it. If my relatives knew that I was Gay, my BIGGEST fear would be them thinking that I would be some sparkling fairy skipping through the forest. I'm into some pretty manly shit, though, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't think that, but, that slight possibility is still there >.< 

And sorry about how the GSA thing turned out xp



8-bit said:


> My little sister (6 yrs) said I liked guys.......  at the dinner table. I had to play that off better than Keyboard Cat. My  dad is homophobic and almost shat a grenade when he found out I had gay  sex.


 
Lol, what an epic way to come out. 

"Hey daddy, 8-bit likes guys."


----------



## The DK (Sep 26, 2010)

damn drum that sucks, you shouldnt have to have that pressure when your still deciding on the way your gonna go.


----------



## 8-bit (Sep 26, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Lol, what an epic way to come out.
> 
> "Hey daddy, 8-bit likes guys."


 
LOL. Good thing she's a little shithead lier, or I'd be in deep trouble.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 26, 2010)

8-bit said:


> LOL. Good thing she's a little shithead lier, or I'd be in deep trouble.


 
Lol, yeah. 

Thankfully, my parents don't give a shit about Gays, I'm a bit iffy about my dad, though, he doesn't care about Gays, but he's one of those guys who believe that homosexuality isn't natural and stuff :I 

I'm in really good terms with my dad, though, I honestly can't see him hating/disowning me over being Gay.


----------



## 8-bit (Sep 26, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Lol, yeah.
> 
> Thankfully, my parents don't give a shit about Gays, I'm a bit iffy about my dad, though, he doesn't care about Gays, but he's one of those guys who believe that homosexuality isn't natural and stuff :I
> 
> I'm in really good terms with my dad, though, I honestly can't see him hating/disowning me over being Gay.


 
Lucky shit >:/


----------



## The DK (Sep 26, 2010)

8-bit said:


> Lucky shit >:/



my parent would probably be ok with me being bi and all. my great uncle was gay so my family doesnt really care about such things


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## Darkwing (Sep 26, 2010)

8-bit said:


> Lucky shit >:/


 
Meh, I still really don't want them to find out, though, y'know? I don't want to be known as "The Gay kid" in my family. 

Also, I really don't want them going around telling my grandparents about it, they, like all other old people, are, like, super conservative, the only family members I'm pretty sure wouldn't tolerate it would be my grandparents.


----------



## 8-bit (Sep 26, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Meh, I still really don't want them to find out, though, y'know? I don't want to be known as "The Gay kid" in my family.
> 
> Also, I really don't want them going around telling my grandparents about it, they, like all other old people, are, like, super conservative, the only family members I'm pretty sure wouldn't tolerate it would be my grandparents.


 
yeah, my dad almost told my whole family about the man sex >_>;

It would suck to be labeled as the gay relative :/


----------



## Cam (Sep 26, 2010)

8-bit said:


> yeah, my dad almost told my whole family about the man sex >_>;
> 
> It would suck to be labeled as the gay relative :/


 
My gay aunts are the only ones to know im bi...

And every now and again one of them always gives me these pride stickers, so I always stuck them in funny places like on the flush handle of my grandmothers toilet or the carton of milk

It can be alot of fun when you got a family of fags :3


----------



## reaux (Sep 26, 2010)

i came out when i was 15.  the first thing my mom said was "it's ok, we still love you!"  the first thing my sister said was "DUH."  hahahaha.  but yeah, i'm really lucky in that regard

high school was rough, i was bullied for being a big ol dyke.  but now i'm older and happier and life is pretty awesome.


----------



## Cam (Sep 26, 2010)

fawn said:


> i came out when i was 15.  the first thing my mom said was "it's ok, we still love you!"  the first thing my sister said was "DUH."  hahahaha.  but yeah, i'm really lucky in that regard
> 
> high school was rough, i was bullied for being a big ol dyke.  but now i'm older and happier and life is pretty awesome.



Yea I had the bullie issue going for a while... up until I got sik of it and beat the living fuck out of one kid who pushed me too far..

Havent had an issue since and im respected by alot of people


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## Jude (Sep 26, 2010)

I just got back from DC, and it only convinced me more that I was gayer. There are some pretty good looking guys there (compared to here). Most of the guys here are ugly/straight. When it comes to appearance, I think I'm attracted to femininity more than anything, though.

This whole gay ordeal is getting me physically sick to my stomach... I think I'm gonna stop here.

OFF-TOPIC: Oh god cam I love your signature! haha


----------



## Cam (Sep 27, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I just got back from DC, and it only convinced me more that I was gayer. There are some pretty good looking guys there (compared to here). Most of the guys here are ugly/straight. When it comes to appearance, I think I'm attracted to femininity more than anything, though.
> 
> This whole gay ordeal is getting me physically sick to my stomach... I think I'm gonna stop here.
> 
> OFF-TOPIC: Oh god cam I love your signature! haha


 
Why is it such an issue that you find dudes hot?

I would have been fine and dandy with hot ass dudes chilling around me :3

Also I got a date with a guy this friday! Im amped



And also thanx... for the comment and actually calling me cam :3


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## Jude (Sep 27, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> Why is it such an issue that you find dudes hot?
> 
> I would have been fine and dandy with hot ass dudes chilling around me :3
> 
> ...



It's only a big deal because these feeling are (relatively) new, and I have some pretty conservative parents. The few people I've told act really awkwardly towards me and don't talk as much. This is really not what I want to be "known" for. I don't want it to be such an issue.

EDIT: Actually getting around to reading the first post on the first thread... it actually seemed pretty helpful.

I also got some good advice from one of my gay friends. They said that the next time my parents confront me, I should ask "Is there something you want to know..? You're acting very strange." I might just do that next time...

Also, you're welcome for the comment I suppose . I've always read your name as "Cam Murphy" in my mind.


----------



## Cam (Sep 27, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> It's only a big deal because these feeling are (relatively) new, and I have some pretty conservative parents. The few people I've told act really awkwardly towards me and don't talk as much. This is really not what I want to be "known" for. I don't want it to be such an issue.
> 
> EDIT: Actually getting around to reading the first post on the first thread... it actually seemed pretty helpful.
> 
> ...


 
Oh pfft what your parents think... Thats something they cant control, and on a more complicated level, niether can you.

I was kinda iffy when I came out as bi, but I was gernally accepted by everyone... and it was even kind of a shock.. I thought it was a bit obvious... guess not...

But always remember to fuck all the haters.... whether metaphorically.... or physically (;

And also in proper response to the last part:

wooooooord xD


----------



## tsubasa-sama (Sep 29, 2010)

I have no confidence in coming out to my parents whatsoever. My big brother is one of the biggest f*ck ups ever, and my little sister (for lack of a better analogy) isn't the sharpest tool in the shed. Now my parents look at me as "THE GOLDEN CHILD" *cue spot lights and angelic chorus* (well that's what they make it seem like at least). I'm the one (due to my brothers pathetic circumstances) that is supposed to find the woman my parents adore and start a family with her. If i came out to them... 3...2...1... TOTAL MELTDOWN!! Not mention my dad some what disliked his gay little brother because my grand parents used his gayness as an excuse for everything and got away with a lot my dad never could. I can't imagine what he would say/do if he found about his gay son (me) -_________-"
It might barely pass with my mom but i know with out a doubt she would have a break down for a while. Kinda talked to her about it (by talk i mean HUGE hinting) and i told her "well if i was gay why would that change any thing about me, im the same son that you've loved for the past 18 years" she said "because you wouldn't be the same person any more, I wouldn't know who you are" HUGE fml moment. Also I'm getting more and more involved with other guys so I'm trapped having to keep a HUGE portion of my life a complete and total secret. I have thought about maybe telling them when I've moved out but I don't know... GAHHH!!!! help?


----------



## Kryn (Oct 1, 2010)

Well I've finally had some advancement in my coming out process, but since I don't post here often I'll give a little back story. I realized I wasn't the same as everyone else probably when I was around 14, realized I liked males at 16, finally accepted that fact at 18, and finally came out to my sister and her now husband (who I will be referring to as my bro-in-law  from here) when I was 20. Since then we all moved into a house together and we're all neighbors with my bro-in-law's family roughly 10 months ago. I'm 22 now since July and I got my first boyfriend in April and had sex and all that but even though my sis and bro knew I was gay I just couldn't seem to tell them. I got real anxious and discouraged and broke up with him to sorta stay in the closet. 

Turns out my bro knew the guy already from a past job and my then ex-boyfriend sent him a message on facebook, not talking about me at first but eventually asked about me. This led to me eventually telling them and somewhat unsurprisingly they couldn't give a fuck if they tried lol. So I got back together with him and now my bro-in-law's family knows about me and him and they don't give a fuck either. I was really surprised because I live in southern Virginia in a somewhat conservative area.

Now all that's left is telling my own family which I'm still a bit scared to do. But my in-laws are really making me feel a lot better about myself.

I just hope some of you guys having trouble have as good of luck as I have and I hope I still have some good luck left for the rest of the people I need to tell.


----------



## brrrr (Oct 6, 2010)

coming out wasn't even really "coming out" to me. I think I was just telling my mom a story that involved the gay thing and she was like "oh so you're gay" or along the lines, I'm just like "uhh yeah but anyways getting back to the story..." I was pretty open about it once I was certain, excluding distant family because 1) I don't care about them and 2) they're annoying.

Mom was cool w/ it, but eventually she got anxious over having a gay son and told my dad, who...at least tolerates me still. It's annoying that he just doesn't look at me as "masuline" anymore, like my preference turned me into a delicate flower of sorts. It's annoying that the homosexuality thing seems to always be looked on as a crutch. My sister got herself knocked up by some random guy a lil' while back, and my dad blames me over it because he won't have a normal, traditional family from either of us. Kinda just taking the blame out on someone. He's never once been rude, but you can tell he's disappointed. There is an over abundance of questions in regards to when I'll snap out of this and find a girl.


----------



## Sebastian The Swede (Oct 6, 2010)

My parents were totally cool with me being bi (leaning to guys), but I had problems with the rest of my wider family. My uncle was acting totally as an ass, but I don't care anymore 'bout him. Well the only shocked person was my ex-girlfriend when she saw me kissing one good friend of mine. Hah, she was kinda mad  My sis won't come out yet, but hey, that's why I am there for her. 
Most of the wider family was so shocked cause I am the oldest of 7 kids, my parents have. And they don't allow me so much to play with their kids anymore. But as I said, I don't care :3


----------



## Lucien Pyrus (Oct 6, 2010)

Coming out as gay was random for me. I was in a car ride with my mom and she was talking about me having children some day.. and i just blurted it out. I was also kinda mad at her and wanted to shock her. Luckly she didn't react badly. Took her a bit to get used to it. She told my dad. My dad wasn't exactly comfortable about it but he tolerated it. Makes it easy when you have a liberal family.
Anyhow.. recently came out as homoromantic (though i'm unsure if i'm that or biromantic). Another experience. Having to explain that i liked guys.. but that i didn't have any sexual attraction to either sex was hard. I got so much questions about it. Having to explain how my own sexual experiences were to my mother was embarrassing. I still feel out of place. It is like the whole world talks about sex and you just want to scream "shut up!".  I sometimes feel like the freak. I live in a very religious county. Loving a man is a road to being a pariah. And worse.. Asexuality isn't somthing that is exactly supported by the bible. Both are seen as unnatural. My parents know.. but i don't dare tell anyone else.


----------



## Hijiku (Oct 9, 2010)

Okay, I would come out, but there's a really HUGE problem with that.. I'm in a place that's kinda like a live-in school, it's a Job Corps center. And It's populated by total homophobes and people who are affiliated with the Crips and Bloods, and will nearly kill any gay guy on center. The last guy who came out was forced to leave because he was beaten nearly to death. o_o;;

At my home town, Rochester, every knows about me. Even tho I do not act like a steriotypical homo, My close frineds know I am very much gay. I guess I tend to hide who I really am because I fear the possible reactions from others.


----------



## Bambi (Oct 10, 2010)

8-bit said:


> Lucky shit >:/


Some of the horror stories around the forum just bother me; the extent that someones own family would go to make sure that their teenager, or young adult is following a strict, status quo by scaring them is above and beyond fundamentalism -- it's borderline insanity.

I guess I got lucky. I've been out for ... eh, awhile. Family is okay with it. Not much to say, except that helps to have someone to talk to, and they're there for me. I mean, I might flirt with danger per say around the male members of my family (by talking about topics typical males might find controversial) but man, around other gays and women? Ah, <sigh>, release.


----------



## Hijiku (Oct 10, 2010)

Guess you're just that lucky, Bambi.. Not everyone can have it as good as you tho.. *hangs head*


----------



## Sebastian The Swede (Oct 10, 2010)

Hijiku said:


> Guess you're just that lucky, Bambi.. Not everyone can have it as good as you tho.. *hangs head*


 
Well, good luck with surviving! Or just move to Scandinavia :3


----------



## Cam (Oct 10, 2010)

Hijiku said:


> Okay, I would come out, but there's a really HUGE problem with that.. I'm in a place that's kinda like a live-in school, it's a Job Corps center. And It's populated by total homophobes and people who are affiliated with the Crips and Bloods, and will nearly kill any gay guy on center. The last guy who came out was forced to leave because he was beaten nearly to death. o_o;;
> 
> At my home town, Rochester, every knows about me. Even tho I do not act like a steriotypical homo, My close frineds know I am very much gay. I guess I tend to hide who I really am because I fear the possible reactions from others.



That blows... If someone tried to start shit with me because I did dudes, I would giggle with excitement whilst kicking their ass


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## Hijiku (Oct 10, 2010)

cmrnmrphy said:


> That blows... If someone tried to start shit with me because I did dudes, I would giggle with excitement whilst kicking their ass


 
Only issue with that is that I'm kinda outnumbered here.


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## FlareTheDragon (Oct 10, 2010)

I came out along time ago to my friends, and as they are hardcore inked-up, staunch and rutheless skateboarders i was a bit surprised that they didnt care even the slightest, so yeh that was good. Sydney is really open to the gay community which is good, especially the area of it that im from, if someone was homophobic then they ended up in hospital soon after.
As for parents, they were stoked on it when i came out. Since they've never been religious and always open minded to alot of things, it didnt make a difference to them whether i was gay or bi or straight. Seems im one of those lucky ones :S  
Also, I second what cmrnmrphy last said  dun take no shit!


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## FenrerWolf (Oct 20, 2010)

I came out of the closest for being bi about 6 and a half months ago, told my closest friend that and was expection a lot of crap, but it turns out I have good friends, have told all of them at this point and they except me, only two family members know about me though, the rest is to old school, and I really cant tell my dad. So where I'm happy I've got acepting friends I'm a little sad that I have to keep this a secret from the one person I'd never lie to


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## SydneySnake (Oct 23, 2010)

I came out to my mom a while ago, she was pretty cool with it. I was really embarrassed during that whole conversation though XD; But I'm still trying to tell some of my friends at college, the main problem is that my college doesn't have a LGBT or Gay Straight alliance program thing anymore because of lack of interest DX

Does anyone have any suggestions for coming out to friends, and or meeting other gay/bi guys?


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## FenrerWolf (Oct 25, 2010)

SydneySnake said:


> Does anyone have any suggestions for coming out to friends, and or meeting other gay/bi guys?



Well I personally think different people have diffent ways of coming out, but my advice would be just use good timing, its what I did, and once you have at least one friend to back you its easy to come out to the others. I don't have anything on finding other gay/bi guys, the few I found were either taken or had no connection with, lol


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## Darkwing (Oct 25, 2010)

SydneySnake said:


> Does anyone have any suggestions for coming out to friends, and or meeting other gay/bi guys?


 
Coming out to friends? I'd say come out to you're closest and most trusting friend first. And timing is a good thing, too. 

Finding other Gay/bi guys is quite a challenge.

Honestly, I used to just fund a cute guy and hit on him, I can't do that anymore because so many people are onto me >.> 

But, yeah, find some cute guys and see how it goes. If you're not that upfront, you could always find Gay clubs and stuff, I don't really recommend those if you're looking for a serious relationship, though. 

And if it seems like there are no chances locally, just look for guys on the internet, get to know him really well first, though, and always make your first date at a public place.


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## Nex (Oct 25, 2010)

I came out a little over a year ago to my best friend of nine years. He made a face, then told me that he too was bi. It was a hilarious moment and a few months later, we started dating, it eventually fell apart, but we're still pretty good friends and hang out a couple of times a week.

When I came out publicly, nobody seemed to object. I'm also six foot, 210, and a former soldier, so nobody bothered me about it. 
 My mom just smiled and said "I knew it" when I told her.

The best way I've found is to locate a same sex partner is to just get up, get out, talk to as many people as possible, and wear a subtle hint that a guy interested in guys might notice. (A titanium earing in my case, you know those ones that are all sorts of colorful badassery.) Even if your socially awkward like me, the more you put yourself out there, the more likely you are to be seen. I live in small town Texas, and still somehow manage to find others. Keep at it.


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## NK129 (Oct 25, 2010)

<--In closet Bi.

Well I am more like "straight until proven Bi" kind of person right now.
I had thoughts Terrible thoughts...but they have only been thoughts.
And it's because I tend to like my straight guy friends a Little too much. =X
But I damn well know I am at least straight because girls are Nice and Soft and Squishy...so Very squishy.
Don't know about "coming out" and all that since if I did my mom would spit loogies in horror and my dad would beat with a waffle iron (probably).


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## Nex (Oct 25, 2010)

NK129 said:


> <--In closet Bi.
> 
> Well I am more like "straight until proven Bi" kind of person right now.
> I had thoughts Terrible thoughts...but they have only been thoughts.
> ...


 
It can defiantly be a maddening, double edged sword at times when you are strangely attracted to friends. You just have to understand that not everyone is "Obtainable" for lack of a better word. Regardless of who's undies' contents you are looking to get at, there is a logical "Can happen" or "Wont happen" label you can place on them mentally depending on what they prefer. I almost learned this the hard way while in the military after drinking a bit too much and misreading my roommate's joking advances for real ones. Just use good judgement and think hard about your actions, because regardless of what the "We shouldn't have to hide" crowd thinks, there are still ignorant dumb fucks in your everyday life.

If anyone is really having trouble coming out and feels like they must test the waters of how people will react, talk to your GOOD friends first. Explain yourself a bit and make sure they understand that what you are saying is not an advance, and that you are the same guy they have known for however long they have known you. I have yet to hear of a real bad reaction to this. I think Dr. Seuss said it best: "Be who you are and say how you feel, because who mind don't matter, and those who matter matter don't mind." If they are complete dumb asses who see this as a grounds to terminate their friendship with you; guess what? They aren't your damned friends and are too narrow minded to understand that what you do in bed is your own damned choice. If they can't grasp that you are sharing who you are with them BECAUSE they are your friend, then fuck 'em.

*Pant pant pant.*


 As for your parents? Best to wait in my opinion. Keep any fun stuff out of your house until you get your own place to can do what ever crazy shit you're into to whom ever you want. But that's only if you know for a fact that they look at homosexuality like it's gonna damn you to hell, or means you have aids, or that you will automatically start eating poo while tap dancing in a mini skirt, or whatever. If you know that they would be understanding (As most will be, trust me. My mother is pretty damned conservative.) tell them. 

This advice goes out to everyone.


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## Jashwa (Oct 26, 2010)

Agreed that having crushes on straight guy friends is a bitchhh. Luckily, I only get crushes on nice guy friends who are awesome sports about it.


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## Hir (Oct 29, 2010)

I came out to like 10 friends at once today, it was awesome.


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## Browder (Oct 29, 2010)

DarkNoctus said:


> I came out to like 10 friends at once today, it was awesome.


 
Congratulations! I trust they took it well?


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## Hir (Oct 29, 2010)

yeah really well actually. It was funny because I only intended to tell one friend but the others heard me so I decided I'd just tell them all.

it'll now inevitably spread to everyone, that should be fun!


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## 9livesbunny (Nov 4, 2010)

It's sad that as an adult woman, I have to keep "coming out" to my real dad that I am straight! He lives in another state. He is over religious, and thinks there is something "wrong" with me because I haven't married or had any children by now.

 He knows I have gay friends, and he knows it's a sore subject for me when he brings up homosexuals and quotes the freaking bible on me. He is so homophobic, he freaks out about gays being able to adopt. That argument got pretty heated! All he had was the bible to go by, not common sense. He comes across as being really ignorant when he justifies his reasoning with the bible. It's apparent to me he doesn't read very much else.

I'll probably have to "come out" again next week when he calls. lol


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## mitchau (Nov 4, 2010)

I'm having trouble figuring out if I am bi or not.


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## Randy-Darkshade (Nov 4, 2010)

9livesbunny said:


> It's sad that as an adult woman, I have to keep "coming out" to my real dad that I am straight! He lives in another state. He is over religious, and thinks there is something "wrong" with me because I haven't married or had any children by now.
> 
> He knows I have gay friends, and he knows it's a sore subject for me when he brings up homosexuals and quotes the freaking bible on me. He is so homophobic, he freaks out about gays being able to adopt. That argument got pretty heated! All he had was the bible to go by, not common sense. He comes across as being really ignorant when he justifies his reasoning with the bible. It's apparent to me he doesn't read very much else.
> 
> I'll probably have to "come out" again next week when he calls. lol



I was told by my sister that our dad is thinking I am gay because I have never had a proper GF or relationship and that I have had a male internet friend visit twice. Yes my male friend is bisexual, but I am straight. Well, I suppose technically Bi, but I have a strong preference for females, so I call myself straight.


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## 9livesbunny (Nov 4, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> I was told by my sister that our dad is thinking I am gay because I have never had a proper GF or relationship and that I have had a male internet friend visit twice. Yes my male friend is bisexual, but I am straight. Well, I suppose technically Bi, but I have a strong preference for females, so I call myself straight.


 
 Oh yeah. My dad even questions my uncle(from my mother's side) not being married! My uncle is 6 years older than I. He finally married, but it didn't even last a year. He goes out with women all of the time. But, my real dad thinks there's something "wrong" with you if you haven't settled down. I told him that not everybody want's to get married. Not everybody want's to be the status quo. I told him that just because you're straight and single, it does NOT mean you are gay. Next time he brings it up, I'll say to him that he should be "thrilled" that the gay people want to be married. That would mean there's not anything wrong with them! lol


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## Randy-Darkshade (Nov 4, 2010)

9livesbunny said:


> Oh yeah. My dad even questions my uncle(from my mother's side) not being married! My uncle is 6 years older than I. He finally married, but it didn't even last a year. He goes out with women all of the time. But, my real dad thinks there's something "wrong" with you if you haven't settled down. I told him that not everybody want's to get married. Not everybody want's to be the status quo. I told him that just because you're straight and single, it does NOT mean you are gay. Next time he brings it up, I'll say to him that he should be "thrilled" that the gay people want to be married. That would mean there's not anything wrong with them! lol



If I said I liked being single (as I normally say) I'd be a liar. The only person I have for company in my apartment is my brother until he gets an apartment of his own. 

Maybe one day I'll find someone. Then again, maybe I am destined to die alone. after all, I'm almost 27 and only ever had two online relationships. and bioth failed not due to any fault of mine. first one just disappeared one day, and the other just went completely nuts on me.


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## 9livesbunny (Nov 4, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> If I said I liked being single (as I normally say) I'd be a liar. The only person I have for company in my apartment is my brother until he gets an apartment of his own.
> 
> Maybe one day I'll find someone. Then again, maybe I am destined to die alone. after all, I'm almost 27 and only ever had two online relationships. and bioth failed not due to any fault of mine. first one just disappeared one day, and the other just went completely nuts on me.


 You're still a "baby" yet. And I don't mean that in an insulting way. My relationship came when I wasn't looking for it. And I was kinda shocked the way it happened, too. But nonetheless, I'm happy for it! It'll happen. : )


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## Randy-Darkshade (Nov 4, 2010)

9livesbunny said:


> You're still a "baby" yet. And I don't mean that in an insulting way. My relationship came when I wasn't looking for it. And I was kinda shocked the way it happened, too. But nonetheless, I'm happy for it! It'll happen. : )



I don't feel like a baby, I feel old already. Probably due to my body feeling old, like my temperamental right knee, plays up when it feels like, or is triggered, especially if I kneel on it wrong like I did on Monday at dads. I like to keep an open mind, if I end up with someone, great! but I don't think I'd be worried about being alone. Well it doesn't worry me much at the moment. but then I am still young.


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## SydneySnake (Nov 4, 2010)

@FenrirWolf + Darkwing: Thanks for the advice.  I'll try and tell a couple of my friends... in a few weeks... =_=' Got stuck with this guy who's totally homophobic for a group project, so it'll have to wait at least until that project is done. Just in case.


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## Kimosky (Nov 5, 2010)

I had my first "public" relationship with a guy starting this April for a couple of months, before then I was too scared to ever do anything out in the open because of my dad </3. Admittedly, he talks to me less now, but he seems pretty OK with it - I haven't been excommunicated or anything, so yay me! =)

It's been both a blessing and a burden though - whilst guys I know now don't mind acting sexually "inappropriate" with me, there's also some people who I really wish wouldn't </3. But hey-ho, what'ya gonna do?


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## CrazedPorcupine (Nov 14, 2010)

I have been reluctant to come fully out of the closet as bi. I've told a few of my closest friends and they don't really care. I haven't yet come out to my parents cause i'm afraid of how they'll treat me. No pain hurts more then when parents reject their child.


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## Cam (Nov 14, 2010)

CrazedPorcupine said:


> I have been reluctant to come fully out of the closet as bi. I've told a few of my closest friends and they don't really care. I haven't yet come out to my parents cause i'm afraid of how they'll treat me. No pain hurts more then when parents reject their child.


 
First off there is too pain that hurts ALOT worse than that; Just for the record.

When I first came out as bi, i didnt really know what to do. I started telling close friends, they didnt give a shit. So eventually i told everyone.

People are shocked when they realize that you dont have to be a faggot to like guys. Because i dont have much feminine in me at all.


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## CrazedPorcupine (Nov 14, 2010)

it is true there are some pains worse but I haven't yet experienced them.

When I first came out to some people the were shocked but it was mostly because I hid the fact so well. A few of my friends actually said I knew it. they said they guessed from the way I acted.

I Think the gay/bi stereotype is extremely annoying as most people expect high pitched voices or very feminine personalities so when they see a gay/bi guy that is extremely smart or athletic and hates shopping most are surprised.


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## Milo (Nov 16, 2010)

CrazedPorcupine said:


> I have been reluctant to come fully out of the closet as bi. I've told a few of my closest friends and they don't really care. I haven't yet come out to my parents cause i'm afraid of how they'll treat me. No pain hurts more then when parents reject their child.


 
what about the "best of both worlds" I keep hearing about? tell the straight women your straight, and the gay dudes you're gay?

I don't honestly completely see the need to come out if you're only bi. just lie to your parents. when they say, "are you gay?" you just say "no mom, I still like women"

lol


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## Emily_Maus (Nov 17, 2010)

I came out to my family of being Trans. They thought I was delusional and probably insane, that was two years ago, and still in recent conversations they think I'm either lying, attention seeking or clinically crazy. Making progress in Transitioning despite what they say. My parents did ask me "Why couldn't you just be gay?" >.<; Regardless of how good I've got at explaining it, I've had to tell them on serveral occasions, They still think I'm batshit crazy because I feel out of place in my own body.


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## Isen (Nov 22, 2010)

Milo said:


> what about the "best of both worlds" I keep hearing about? tell the straight women your straight, and the gay dudes you're gay?
> 
> I don't honestly completely see the need to come out if you're only bi. just lie to your parents. when they say, "are you gay?" you just say "no mom, I still like women"
> 
> lol



People do this and then wonder why bi guys get stigmatized.  Bisexuals get shit from both sides.  Being invisible isn't exactly going to promote understanding and empathy.  Also, if all the bi guys are in stealth mode, how are we supposed to find other bi guys in the wild?

Anyway, I've been feeling pretty awesome about sexuality stuff lately.  Been talking to my super-religious parents about my personal issues and lack of religious belief, so I'm kind of in catharsis mode anyway.  Tempted to pull a "HEY GUYS GUESS WHAT" on facebook or something.


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## CrazedPorcupine (Nov 22, 2010)

>.< This is the downside of growing up in a relatively religious home. At school if someone asks I will tell depending on who is asking and if they know my brother who also goes to school with me but is 2 grades down.


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## Maxxarcade (Nov 30, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> I don't feel like a baby, I feel old already. Probably due to my body feeling old, like my temperamental right knee, plays up when it feels like, or is triggered, especially if I kneel on it wrong like I did on Monday at dads. I like to keep an open mind, if I end up with someone, great! but I don't think I'd be worried about being alone. Well it doesn't worry me much at the moment. but then I am still young.


 
You sound so much like me it's crazy... I'm 30 and have the same problems, relationship wise and physical.  I always say I'm destined to die alone too.


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## Randy-Darkshade (Nov 30, 2010)

Maxxarcade said:


> You sound so much like me it's crazy... I'm 30 and have the same problems, relationship wise and physical.  I always say I'm destined to die alone too.


 
One of my friends who is 30 has arthritis in both knees. It was kinda odd seeing him walking on a stick on some days when he was just 30 years of age.


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## HotterOtter (Nov 30, 2010)

Oh, god.

I got from work today, and opened up my laptop.

Giant on the screen, filling it, was this gay furry sketch I was working on in SAI.

I didn't leave it like that. Some of the other tabs were moved/closed too.
My brother, 14 , is the only one who trys to get on my laptop ever.

I think he just simultaneously found out i was furry, and gay.

God, I don't know what to do. I'm not out of the closet to anyone, and there's no way he'll get what a furry is. Being the person he his, he'll just be saying things to friends like, "I opened up my bro's laptop and there was the gay otter-thing with it's dick all hanging out with a dildo up it's ass, lol"

/lifedestroyingmoment


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## Jude (Dec 1, 2010)

HotterOtter said:


> God, I don't know what to do. I'm not out of the closet to anyone, and there's no way he'll get what a furry is. Being the person he his, he'll just be saying things to friends like, "I opened up my bro's laptop and there was the gay otter-thing with it's dick all hanging out with a dildo up it's ass, lol"
> 
> /lifedestroyingmoment


 
Uh... pics? :V


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## HotterOtter (Dec 1, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Uh... pics? :V


 
Gah, fine, because it's so incredibly important to the outcome of this situation



(NSFW)


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## Jude (Dec 1, 2010)

HotterOtter said:


> Gah, fine, because it's so incredibly important to the outcome of this situation
> 
> 
> 
> (NSFW)



lol I was joking. I can't view it anyway 'cause of my underage account.

If he confronts you, just make something up. "Yeah, a bunch of sickos over the internet pay me to draw this shit." or something like that. If he doesn't confront you, then I wouldn't worry about it too much.


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## Darkwing (Dec 1, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> lol I was joking. I can't view it anyway 'cause of my underage account.
> 
> If he confronts you, just make something up. "Yeah, a bunch of sickos over the internet pay me to draw this shit." or something like that. If he doesn't confront you, then I wouldn't worry about it too much.


 
Nah that's a stupid excuse. 

Personally, if he confronts you about it, you'd have to straight up tell him the truth. 

I mean, hey, it's your brother's fault for going through YOUR laptop and YOUR property without your permission.


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## masterkennyG (Dec 1, 2010)

I came out I want to say the beginning of my JR year in High school. I have to say The way I did it really worked out well. I first came out on the internet/ facebook. I felt secure because i wasn't telling people face to face I was gay. afterwords many of my friends and classmates started confronting me about it from there on out if anyone were to ask me I would tell them "yes im gay". Luckily never being interested in jacking off to porn I had no gay porn saved on my computer. I think the gayest things that might have been on my computer  were a few furry art pieces of a gay couple cuddling. 

A few weeks later I asked both of my folks if I could talk to them. I told them that one of my friends that was a boy was more than just my friend. I cant deny It was one of the most awkward conversations i had with my parents and I hated every sec of it. but I am still very happy with my decision of coming out to them. lol things just kept on getting better for me. my friends accepted me for who I was because everyone knew I was still the same old Kenneth that would always be on the field ready to play Frisbee, or the Kenneth who would always beat anyone in a swim race, or the Kenneth that is always laughing at his English teacher.  ha! 

From there on end me being so open about my sexuality helped others. many other students throughout my high-school years have came to me asking for advice with there confused thoughts. another positive thing about being openly gay is you get more boys . but moving back on I eventually starting doing a little modeling with places that appreciated my sexuality and I currently work/ dance at a gay club in new orleans. Im having a blast. well thats my coming out story I guess.


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## HotterOtter (Dec 1, 2010)

Hopefully he's be distracted enough by the whole "finding out his brother's gay" thing to care about what the hell i was drawing.

But he acted pretty normal today. No awkward stares/ silences. And i know my parents didn't get on. They never have, and have their own computers. Besides, my dad literally does not know how to close a tab. Let alone erase history on, for example, the family computer. Gah


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## Jude (Dec 1, 2010)

FFUUU - I came out to ONE person like three months ago, and now he just told HIS friend. I told his friend not to tell anyone, but he's kind of a douchebag. Fuck, I might be forced into coming out to all of my friends soon :/


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## Randy-Darkshade (Dec 2, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> FFUUU - I came out to ONE person like three months ago, and now he just told HIS friend. I told his friend not to tell anyone, but he's kind of a douchebag. Fuck, I might be forced into coming out to all of my friends soon :/



Being furry =/= being gay, you don't need to "come out" unless you're one of those retards who takes being furry way to far anyway.

There really is no need to "come out", stop treating furry the same way you'd treat being gay, it is not the same damn thing. Sooner some furries realise this the better.


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## ForestFox91 (Dec 2, 2010)

Well I came out during labor day weekend. I got horribly shit-faced drunk and told all of my friends. They all said it didn't matter or they knew about it before I found out. I told them I found out when I was 17 and a half, and they said they knew during 8th grade. All I remember is some kid calling me a faggot, and me yelling something, and then all of a sudden people were staring at me. It's funny because my mom constantly tried to censor me, because she didn't want the whole town treating me like shit. I proved her wrong, since all my friends were cool. I mean every time I go back home I get a bit of disrespect from the village cowboys, rednecks, and idiot conservatives, but everybody that matters treats me with respect. I am even honored by being a role model for some of the kids facing homophobia in the middle and high schools. My mother was cruel to me when she found out, about a year and a half ago, but she is becoming more and more accepting. My father has never really cared in the first place. I'm now in college, and ... it gets better... as much as I dislike gimmicks, "It gets better" is actually right.


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## Darkwing (Dec 2, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> Being furry =/= being gay, you don't need to "come out" unless you're one of those retards who takes being furry way to far anyway.
> 
> There really is no need to "come out", stop treating furry the same way you'd treat being gay, it is not the same damn thing. Sooner some furries realise this the better.


 
Meh, to be fair, I'd MUCH rather have someone find out that I'm Gay than to find out that I'm furry. 

Furries tend to have a bad stigma of fucking animals and people in fursuits (And a wide variety of other bad stereotypes). I'd much rather associate myself with the Gay crowd.


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## Jude (Dec 2, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> Being furry =/= being gay, you don't need  to "come out" unless you're one of those retards who takes being furry  way to far anyway.
> 
> There really is no need to "come out", stop  treating furry the same way you'd treat being gay, it is not the same  damn thing. Sooner some furries realise this the better.


 



Darkwing said:


> Meh, to be fair, I'd MUCH rather have someone find out that I'm Gay than to find out that I'm furry.
> 
> Furries tend to have a bad stigma of fucking animals and people in fursuits (And a wide variety of other bad stereotypes). I'd much rather associate myself with the Gay crowd.


 
WHOA, whoa, what? I wasn't talking about being furry! I was talking about being bisexual >__>


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## Darkwing (Dec 2, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> WHOA, whoa, what? I wasn't talking about being furry! I was talking about being bisexual >__>


 
Ooh. 

Well, then, you're pretty much fucked when your friend starts telling other people you're bisexual.


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## Randy-Darkshade (Dec 2, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> WHOA, whoa, what? I wasn't talking about being furry! I was talking about being bisexual >__>



Oh...er....then I retract my statement.


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## masterkennyG (Dec 6, 2010)

RandyDarkshade said:


> Being furry =/= being gay, you don't need to "come out" unless you're one of those retards who takes being furry way to far anyway.
> 
> There really is no need to "come out", stop treating furry the same way you'd treat being gay, it is not the same damn thing. Sooner some furries realise this the better.


 

I disagree with your statement. sometimes people will come to realize there sexual orientation through furrys art. . I personally knew I was gay before looking at art but a few of my friends loosened up and came to make a better decision about there sexual orientation through seeing how they reacted to male furry drawings as appose to female furry drawings.  but Also continuing of the matter if you tell 1 friend he will tell others. Its the first step to actually coming out. wait a bit see if more of your friends start to suspect and when the time is right tell them. but i can def see your reasoning. there is a bigg difference from furrys and being gay. and i personally would rather be on the gay group than the furry group in real life.


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## Jude (Dec 6, 2010)

I was talking to someone I've looked up to for a while now about my orientation. I've barely talked to him before. As soon as I came out to him, we talked for like six hours. It was great. He freaking offered me his HOUSE in case I get disowned or kicked out by my parents. He's SUCH a nice guy!

He also sent me a picture of him in his underwear, hehe


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## Darkwing (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I was talking to someone I've looked up to for a while now about my orientation. I've barely talked to him before. As soon as I came out to him, we talked for like six hours. It was great. He freaking offered me his HOUSE in case I get disowned or kicked out by my parents. He's SUCH a nice guy!
> 
> He also sent me a picture of him in his underwear, hehe


 
Wow, that's great to hear! 

Soo, you considering on hooking up with him or something?

EDIT: Although it is kinda weird how he sent you a pic of him in his underwear when you and him barely talked.


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## The DK (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I was talking to someone I've looked up to for a while now about my orientation. I've barely talked to him before. As soon as I came out to him, we talked for like six hours. It was great. He freaking offered me his HOUSE in case I get disowned or kicked out by my parents. He's SUCH a nice guy!
> 
> He also sent me a picture of him in his underwear, hehe



*claps* Awsome to hear... so yeah what darkwing said you gonna hook up?


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## Jude (Dec 6, 2010)

Haha there's no chance. He's a college freshman. And the whole underwear thing was a half-joke. He actually sent it to me on accident (He's still pretty hot though, dayum).

I kinda have a crush on him though >.<. Too bad he's way outta my league.


----------



## 8-bit (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Haha there's no chance. He's a college freshman. And the whole underwear thing was a half-joke. He actually sent it to me on accident (He's still pretty hot though, dayum).
> 
> I kinda have a crush on him though >.<. Too bad he's way outta my league.





GO FOR IT, DUDE!!!!!

 :3


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Haha there's no chance. He's a college freshman. And the whole underwear thing was a half-joke. He actually sent it to me on accident (He's still pretty hot though, dayum).
> 
> I kinda have a crush on him though >.<. Too bad he's way outta my league.


 
Ugh, yeah, I've been there, I hate having crushes on older guys. Hopefully you'll find someone a little more your age, though. Best of luck to ya.


----------



## Jude (Dec 6, 2010)

8-bit said:


> GO FOR IT, DUDE!!!!!
> 
> :3


 
He's an extremely popular outgoing attractive talented 18 year old, and I'm just some shy little high school sophomore :/



Darkwing said:


> Ugh, yeah, I've been there, I hate having crushes on older guys. Hopefully you'll find someone a little more your age, though. Best of luck to ya.


 
Yeah, thanks . Apparently my school has a pretty big gay community that I'm aware of. I said "I can't really find any gay/bi sophomores" and he was like "REALLY?!?! Your gaydar must be totally busted." Maybe I'll just come out and hope that anyone interested would come to me.

EDIT: Fuck yeah post #1000


----------



## Browder (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> He's an extremely popular outgoing attractive talented 18 year old, and I'm just some shy little high school sophomore :/


 
Does he live in the town as you?


----------



## Jude (Dec 6, 2010)

Browder said:


> Does he live in the town as you?


 
Well... yeah. He went to the same school as me when I was a freshman and he was a senior. But he even said himself that he's pretty picky about who he goes out with. I'm not exactly the best looking guy you'll ever meet. And you know its not a good sign when you're talking to him and he's like "dawww, thats so cute. you never talk, I didn't even know you had a voice".


----------



## Jashwa (Dec 6, 2010)

Browder said:


> Does he live in the town as you?


 Glad to see that your grammar isn't disappointing, Browder. 

I think one of your words got abducted by aliens.


----------



## Browder (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Well... yeah. He went to the same school as me when I was a freshman and he was a senior. But he even said himself that he's pretty picky about who he goes out with. I'm not exactly the best looking guy you'll ever meet. And you know its not a good sign when you're talking to him and he's like "dawww, thats so cute. you never talk, I didn't even know you had a voice".


 Go for it. You have nothing to lose.


Jashwa said:


> Glad to see that your grammar isn't disappointing, Browder.
> 
> I think one of your words got abducted by aliens.


 You're an ass. But what else is new. /:


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> He's an extremely popular outgoing attractive talented 18 year old, and I'm just some shy little high school sophomore :/


 
Don't think like that, talent doesn't matter when it comes to love, and looks really don't matter as long as you look normal. It's all about personality, really.


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 6, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> And you know its not a good sign when you're talking to him and he's like "dawww, thats so cute. you never talk, I didn't even know you had a voice".


 
How is that not a good sign? Some people actually like shy guys


----------



## Jude (Dec 7, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> How is that not a good sign? Some people actually like shy guys



Judging by his past bf's, most of them aren't shy at all.



Darkwing said:


> Don't think like that, talent doesn't matter when it comes to love, and looks really don't matter as long as you look normal. It's all about personality, really.


 
Yeah, I suppose that's true. The thing is, he has like a ton of guys just lining up to date him. He invited me over to his house to talk and work on music, so maybe I can flirt with him until I ask him on a date.

I'm fucking new at this, how do I go about flirting with guys? Especially one that's sorta feminine and artsy.


----------



## The DK (Dec 7, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> I'm fucking new at this, how do I go about flirting with guys? Especially one that's sorta feminine and artsy.



I stick use the same methods when flirting with girls, make em laugh, a little inuendos, give em a hard time jokingly ofcourse, talk them up.... like that i guess but thats just how i talk to people normally. >_>


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 7, 2010)

DrumFur said:


> Judging by his past bf's, most of them aren't shy at all.


 
Oh screw them, quit comparing yourself to others, and instead focus on your positive aspects. 



DrumFur said:


> Yeah,  I suppose that's true. The thing is, he has like a ton of guys just  lining up to date him. He invited me over to his house to talk and work  on music, so maybe I can flirt with him until I ask him on a date.
> 
> I'm fucking new at this, how do I go about flirting with guys? Especially one that's sorta feminine and artsy.


 
Oooo. Flirting, my favorite topic :3 

Go slow, don't start off groping him, give him a lot of eye contact (Although not to the point where it's creepy, let it come naturally.) compliment him a lot and smile. If he feels down or something, show him that you care and give him a hug. Just keep it slow when you're visiting him the first time, don't expect to be kissing him the first time you go over his house.


----------



## Grandpriest (Dec 7, 2010)

Come out, come out, WHEREVER YOU FAGS ARE! <3

Sadly, I had someone tell me I was gay.  I was that much in denial, to have to have someone tell me that I was gay.  I did NOT want to accept it at first.
It was for the best, though.  At least I'm not living a lie, anymore.


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 7, 2010)

Grandpriest said:


> Sadly, I had someone tell me I was gay.  I was that much in denial, to have to have someone tell me that I was gay.  I did NOT want to accept it at first.
> It was for the best, though.  At least I'm not living a lie, anymore.


 
Wow, you must've acted very Gay though 0.0 

But yeah, I've had my fair share of denial. I know the feeling, it's a shock accepting that you'll end up with another dude, because originally you'd think that you'd be with a wife and everything. 

Eventually I've learned to accept and embrace my homosexuality, despite the stigma behind it (After trying to make myself straight, oh God x.x)


----------



## Grandpriest (Dec 7, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Wow, you must've acted very Gay though 0.0
> 
> But yeah, I've had my fair share of denial. I know the feeling, it's a shock accepting that you'll end up with another dude, because originally you'd think that you'd be with a wife and everything.
> 
> Eventually I've learned to accept and embrace my homosexuality, despite the stigma behind it (After trying to make myself straight, oh God x.x)


I ... doubt that was the case.  I was in a special situation.  Besides my abnormally high voice (it's still been high after puberty x.x), I "acted" straight.
Long story short: did a lot of testing, and guy accidentally spills to me thinking I already know when I actually don't that I'm gay.  I even tried to play it off as bi when I called Mom to tell her what they just told me, and all the staff members were all "No Kyle, you're gay."  I was in tears. rofl

And oh yes ... I feel you on trying to "turn straight".  Hell on Earth, dude. lol  I don't think I've ever hated myself that much before.  Thank goodness that point in my life is over.


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 7, 2010)

Grandpriest said:


> I ... doubt that was the case.  I was in a special situation.  Besides my abnormally high voice (it's still been high after puberty x.x), I "acted" straight.
> Long story short: did a lot of testing, and guy accidentally spills to me thinking I already know when I actually don't that I'm gay.  I even tried to play it off as bi when I called Mom to tell her what they just told me, and all the staff members were all "No Kyle, you're gay."  I was in tears. rofl


 
Ooh xD 

My story is nothing special, I could go on forever, really, but to bring it short it's just a ton of self-psychological conflict x.x 



Grandpriest said:


> And  oh yes ... I feel you on trying to "turn straight".  Hell on Earth,  dude. lol  I don't think I've ever hated myself that much before.  Thank  goodness that point in my life is over.


 
Yeah xc 

I've tried to flirt/date girls and whatnot, I noticed that there was something about it that just didn't feel right, and there was also the fact that girls never turned me on, that part drove me wild xD


----------



## Grandpriest (Dec 8, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Ooh xD
> 
> My story is nothing special, I could go on forever, really, but to bring it short it's just a ton of self-psychological conflict x.x
> 
> ...


 Ya.  I always wondered why guys acted like they did around girls.  I was so confused.  I was like "self control, dude?".
Now I know why.  Still, it doesn't excuse some of the behavior I saw.  You don't see me doing some of that stuff to every guy I see! rofl


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 8, 2010)

Grandpriest said:


> Ya.  I always wondered why guys acted like they did around girls.  I was so confused.  I was like "self control, dude?".
> Now I know why.  Still, it doesn't excuse some of the behavior I saw.  You don't see me doing some of that stuff to every guy I see! rofl


 
Well, admit it, you would act the same if there was no stigma behind being Gay xD


----------



## Kryn (Dec 10, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Well, admit it, you would act the same if there was no stigma behind being Gay xD


 
God, this. If I wasn't worried about most likely someone attempting to beat my ass I would flirt with everyone lmao


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 10, 2010)

Kryn said:


> God, this. If I wasn't worried about most likely someone attempting to beat my ass I would flirt with everyone lmao


 
Yeah. 

I'm lucky I'm still alive after spending all last year openly flirting with guys 0.0 

Everyone's too homophobic and straight where I live =(


----------



## Jude (Dec 10, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah.
> 
> I'm lucky I'm still alive after spending all last year openly flirting with guys 0.0
> 
> Everyone's too homophobic and straight where I live =(


 
I just came out to like ten people I know.

They were just like "cool story bro" and didn't really question me, or even care at all, to be honest.

Fuck yea.


----------



## The DK (Dec 10, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah.
> 
> I'm lucky I'm still alive after spending all last year openly flirting with guys 0.0
> 
> Everyone's too homophobic and straight where I live =(



Its just because there in the closet and they really like, they just dont want to admit it


----------



## Grandpriest (Dec 10, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Well, admit it, you would act the same if there was no stigma behind being Gay xD


 No ... not really.
I value self-control, no matter the stigma.


----------



## Darkwing (Dec 10, 2010)

Jude said:


> I just came out to like ten people I know.
> 
> They were just like "cool story bro" and didn't really question me, or even care at all, to be honest.
> 
> Fuck yea.


 
Wow, well, that's Florida for ya :I 

Oh wow I just noticed that you changed your name to Jude wtf x.x 



The DK said:


> Its just because there in the closet and they really like, they just dont want to admit it


 
Exactly :V


----------



## Jude (Dec 10, 2010)

Darkwing said:


> Wow, well, that's Florida for ya :I
> 
> Oh wow I just noticed that you changed your name to Jude wtf x.x



Haha

Drumfur was pretty stupid. It was something I came up with at the last second cause I couldn't think of anything else, so I just changed it to my RL nickname.


----------



## Hir (Jan 6, 2011)

heh I just broadcasted the fact I'm gay to my class

that was fun, I want to do it again :B

everyone couldn't believe it and apparently when I left to get a drink they were like "holy shit I can't believe it, he doesn't act like a female"

it'll spread like wildfire now~


----------



## Kryn (Jan 8, 2011)

Well a bit of an update, so far all of my in-laws know I'm gay from word of mouth. And not a single one has said anything negative to me about it, most of them haven't said anything so I assume they don't care. I'm not sure what to think I used to be terrified of coming out and it turned into a total non issue lol. I mean I live in southwest Virginia, I guess this place is changing a bit or I just found some great people.


----------



## CaptainCool (Jan 9, 2011)

DarkNoctus said:


> "holy shit I can't believe it, *he doesn't act like a female*"


 
your classmates are idiots


----------



## RogueSareth (Jan 10, 2011)

A friend of mine at lunch back in 11th grade was messing around and said " Oh Allie's bi" I thought about it for all of five seconds looked around the suddenly silent table, shrugged and said " Yeah guess I am"  I have been out ever since 
The transgender thing was a bit different. In highschool I contemplated a sex change but when I decided not to I just brushed all the rest of it off and continued being female in all respects, until about a year ago when my gender dysphoria made a come back and I had to go through all that again and refind myself as a women who identifies as male a good 80% of the time. There was an incident on FB not too long afterword where I got pissed and outed myself. Thankfully most of the people where I live are either supportive, apathetic or polite enough not to make a big deal out of anything.


----------



## Hir (Jan 11, 2011)

CaptainCool said:


> your classmates are idiots


 
lol you bet~


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Jan 11, 2011)

My mom cried when she found out I was bi. :B


----------



## Qoph (Jan 14, 2011)

Oh hi guys.

So, now that I'm in a public university, I'd like to come out at some point to more than just my parents and the Internet.  Can I get some advice on that?


----------



## Browder (Jan 14, 2011)

Qoph said:


> Oh hi guys.
> 
> So, now that I'm in a public university, I'd like to come out at some point to more than just my parents and the Internet.  Can I get some advice on that?


 
Just do it. I know the advice sounds kinda useless but honestly it's like diving into a very cold pool. You do it, it stings, then the water warms up. .


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Jan 14, 2011)

Qoph said:


> Oh hi guys.
> 
> So, now that I'm in a public university, I'd like to come out at some point to more than just my parents and the Internet.  Can I get some advice on that?


 
The advice is simple.

Don't.

:v


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 14, 2011)

Qoph said:


> Oh hi guys.
> 
> So, now that I'm in a public university, I'd like to come out at some point to more than just my parents and the Internet.  Can I get some advice on that?


 
Well, first off, does your university have a Gay/straight alliance or any other LGBT type group? How do people in your university view Gays? 

I'd say go for it if you feel it's right.


----------



## Monster. (Jan 14, 2011)

My mom was cool when I told her; my uncle (who is gay) was thrilled; my other uncle was like "Date a girl, I don't want you fucking guys"; my grandpa ignored me; my brother was like "Whatever, sis..." and when I told my grandmother, she started crying and saying, "Don't do this to me!! Not another one!! We have too many gay people in this family!!" Thanks, grandma.


----------



## Cam (Jan 14, 2011)

Miss Haha said:


> My mom was cool when I told her; my uncle (who is gay) was thrilled; my other uncle was like "Date a girl, I don't want you fucking guys"; my grandpa ignored me; my brother was like "Whatever, sis..." and when I told my grandmother, she started crying and saying, "Don't do this to me!! Not another one!! We have too many gay people in this family!!" Thanks, grandma.


 
Ive only managed to tell my dad and sister. Nothing described their faces better than o_0. Im apparently the straightest bi person, according to many people, which I have no idea to take as a good or bad thing

Dont listen to ya gramma though. Thats very ignorant to say, especially to your granddaughter


----------



## Monster. (Jan 14, 2011)

Cam said:


> Ive only managed to tell my dad and sister. Nothing described their faces better than o_0. Im apparently the straightest bi person, according to many people, which I have no idea to take as a good or bad thing
> 
> Dont listen to ya gramma though. Thats very ignorant to say, especially to your granddaughter


 
I tried coming out to my dad; he told me it was stupid because I told him I'm pan. He was like "That's a made-up word; you may as well call yourself confu-sexual." But my brother was totally cool about it. As for my grandma, she's old-fashioned. She thinks it's inappropriate if I wear a tank top and she hates that I'm so opinionated and I don't back down. So it doesn't surprise me that she freaked out. All I can say is if I start dating a girl, I'm bringing her home and having her meet my grandma first.


----------



## Cam (Jan 14, 2011)

Miss Haha said:


> I tried coming out to my dad; he told me it was stupid because I told him I'm pan. He was like "That's a made-up word; you may as well call yourself confu-sexual." But my brother was totally cool about it. As for my grandma, she's old-fashioned. She thinks it's inappropriate if I wear a tank top and she hates that I'm so opinionated and I don't back down. So it doesn't surprise me that she freaked out. All I can say is if I start dating a girl, I'm bringing her home and having her meet my grandma first.


 
Alot of grandmas are like that though. But its good that you dont give a fuck xD

*high five, with an epic clap*


----------



## LupineLove (Jan 14, 2011)

That's brilliant. I salute you, llama girl!


----------



## Qoph (Jan 14, 2011)

I'm at the University of Pittsburgh which isn't a conservative place by any means.  There's at least one LGBT group here but I'm hesitant to join something like that.


----------



## Jude (Jan 14, 2011)

Qoph said:


> I'm at the University of Pittsburgh which isn't a conservative place by any means.  There's at least one LGBT group here but I'm hesitant to join something like that.



My school's LGBT group might as well be an LLLL group. Its annoying.


----------



## Skittle (Jan 14, 2011)

HI GUYS!

So I recently came out to my mom (again) as being transgendered. It went a lot better than it did back when I was 15-16. She took it really well and is trying to call me by my chosen name of Lucian (Lu for short) and is trying to use male pronouns with me. She is iffy about the whole physical transition but said she will support me no matter what. She is just worried about me making such a permanent choice. My dad's side of the family, I don't plan on coming out to until I start HRT. My dad is racist, homophobic, etc. and my mom-mom on that side of the family is devoutly religious. That side of the family doesn't know I am bi (with a more of a gay preference) either.

Bleck.


----------



## Browder (Jan 14, 2011)

Qoph said:


> I'm at the University of Pittsburgh which isn't a conservative place by any means.  There's at least one LGBT group here but I'm hesitant to join something like that.


 
Dude, just do it. It's hard to learn to not care but if you take it in steps you should be fine. It's not like people in the LGBT group won't be sensitive to your situation.




skittle said:


> HI GUYS!
> 
> So I recently came out to my mom (again) as being transgendered. It went a lot better than it did back when I was 15-16. She took it really well and is trying to call me by my chosen name of Lucian (Lu for short) and is trying to use male pronouns with me. She is iffy about the whole physical transition but said she will support me no matter what. She is just worried about me making such a permanent choice. My dad's side of the family, I don't plan on coming out to until I start HRT. My dad is racist, homophobic, etc. and my mom-mom on that side of the family is devoutly religious. That side of the family doesn't know I am bi (with a more of a gay preference) either.
> 
> Bleck.


 
Congratulations. I'm glad your mom is making the adjustment. I imagine it must be hard to suddenly switch pronouns.


----------



## Enwon (Jan 14, 2011)

Well, advice asking time.

I am in an area where it would be a very pointless endeavor and bad idea to come out.  There is no LGBT clubs, and conservative Christians are pretty much in control here.  I don't have any friendships with any depth or substance and as a result don't really have anybody who I feel I can trust.  I won't be able to get out of this area for at least a year and a half and may end up facing a situation where I'm stuck in this state for up to 7 more years.  I really want to get out because I feel like I can't be myself here... not only with the sexuality but with my entire personality.  So the question is...

How do I maintain my sanity?


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Jan 14, 2011)

Enwon said:


> Well, advice asking time.
> 
> I am in an area where it would be a very pointless endeavor and bad idea to come out.  There is no LGBT clubs, and conservative Christians are pretty much in control here.  I don't have any friendships with any depth or substance and as a result don't really have anybody who I feel I can trust.  I won't be able to get out of this area for at least a year and a half and may end up facing a situation where I'm stuck in this state for up to 7 more years.  I really want to get out because I feel like I can't be myself here... not only with the sexuality but with my entire personality.  So the question is...
> 
> How do I maintain my sanity?


 
Drugs? Sounds counterintuitive though huh...


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 14, 2011)

Qoph said:


> I'm at the University of Pittsburgh which isn't a conservative place by any means.



I see. 



Qoph said:


> There's at least one LGBT group here  but I'm hesitant to join something like that.


 
Hahaha, I would agree with you there! xD The local Gay group here is called "Rainbow Mountain" or something, as much as I want to meet with other Gay guys I'm not joining a group that's sooper dooper :I 



Enwon said:


> Well, advice asking time.
> 
> I am in an area where it would be a very pointless endeavor and bad idea to come out.  There is no LGBT clubs, and conservative Christians are pretty much in control here.  I don't have any friendships with any depth or substance and as a result don't really have anybody who I feel I can trust.  I won't be able to get out of this area for at least a year and a half and may end up facing a situation where I'm stuck in this state for up to 7 more years.  I really want to get out because I feel like I can't be myself here... not only with the sexuality but with my entire personality.  So the question is...
> 
> How do I maintain my sanity?


 
Ooh shit that's a pretty tight situation, I'm sorry D: 

My advice: Either wait it out, or seek some friends to talk to, maybe consider visiting a therapist or something just to have someone to talk to.


----------



## Enwon (Jan 15, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Ooh shit that's a pretty tight situation, I'm sorry D:
> 
> My advice: Either wait it out, or seek some friends to talk to, maybe consider visiting a therapist or something just to have someone to talk to.


 
I guess I'll wait it out.  My parents are suddenly getting paranoid about money for college, though.  They may try to force me to go to the nearby university, which will result in me being in this hellhole of a state for 6-7 years at least.  I'm not sure what I'll do if I can't get out when I graduate high school.


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 15, 2011)

Enwon said:


> I guess I'll wait it out.  My parents are suddenly getting paranoid about money for college, though.  They may try to force me to go to the nearby university, which will result in me being in this hellhole of a state for 6-7 years at least.  I'm not sure what I'll do if I can't get out when I graduate high school.


 
Well which state do you live in? 

And if you're in High School, coming out can wait, I suggest you socialize and find some friends, it will help you a lot


----------



## Enwon (Jan 15, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Well which state do you live in?
> 
> And if you're in High School, coming out can wait, I suggest you socialize and find some friends, it will help you a lot


 
Arizona.  And of course coming out can wait.  Coming out in high school anywhere would be stupid.


----------



## Browder (Jan 15, 2011)

Enwon said:


> Coming out in high school anywhere would be stupid.


 
Or brave.


----------



## Milo (Jan 15, 2011)

Enwon said:


> Arizona.


 
scratch that, never come out. EVER.

...or at least move somewhere else :I

lol yea, I came out in highschool.... it's even worse when you're ACTUALLY the only person in the entire school who's out... so yea, I was pretty unpopular


----------



## Browder (Jan 15, 2011)

The only way for things to get better anywhere is for people to realize that their loved ones are homosexuals too. Of course it's a personal choice but it's also a political one. Every time someone comes out, especially to a homophobe, the world gets slightly better.


----------



## Kaizy (Jan 15, 2011)

Milo said:


> scratch that, never come out. EVER.
> 
> ...or at least move somewhere else :I
> 
> lol yea, I came out in highschool.... it's even worse when you're ACTUALLY the only person in the entire school who's out... so yea, I was pretty unpopular


He should move here
California is very acceptive of this kind of thing
Specially in San Francisco


----------



## Enwon (Jan 15, 2011)

Actually, when I think about it, my issues aren't even really about sexual repression.  I don't think coming out would do much other than switch my status from a straight guy who can't get a girlfriend to a gay guy who can't get a boyfriend.  Homosexuality isn't even a big factor about who someone is.  In the end, I think that I'm more frustrated about feelings of intellectual repression, lack of emotional depth in any friendships, and being unable to say what I want to say.  I doubt saying that I'm gay would magically fix my problems.  It won't magically make me a part of anyone's life, it won't magically mean I have anyone to talk to, regardless of their views, who is intelligent and capable of talking about the things I actually enjoy talking about.  In the end, I'm finding that what makes me unhappy has very little to do with sexual orientation.  I can't remember the last time I've have an intelligent, meaningful conversation with anybody my age IRL, because it has never happened.

I look at the idea of being romantically alone and sexually repressed for years, and I'm okay with it.  I look at the idea of feeling awkward in meaningless conversations about the assignment from English class for another minute, and absolutely hate the idea.  So yeah, I guess sexual repression isn't what my issues are really about.

Still.  Thanks for the input, FAF.


----------



## Milo (Jan 15, 2011)

Enwon said:


> Actually, when I think about it, my issues aren't even really about sexual repression.  I don't think coming out would do much other than switch my status from a straight guy who can't get a girlfriend to a gay guy who can't get a boyfriend.


 
what you think about how it labels you isn't in ANY way how other people will label you. 

you'll go from a straight guy who can't get a girlfriend, to a fucking faggot who likes it up the ass.

at least, where you live NOW, that's how it'll be :0


----------



## Querk (Jan 16, 2011)

Enwon said:


> I guess I'll wait it out.  My parents are suddenly getting paranoid about money for college, though.  They may try to force me to go to the nearby university, which will result in me being in this hellhole of a state for 6-7 years at least.  I'm not sure what I'll do if I can't get out when I graduate high school.


 If you're at all worried about getting away for college, I'd suggest hitting the books and applying for scholarships. You might get a free ride somewhere, and you might get a free ride to somewhere _good_ in another state. People can pretty much go to any college in my state with a 32 on the ACT for free (excluding maybe a few), so it shouldn't be hard if you apply yourself.


----------



## Skittle (Jan 17, 2011)

Enwon said:


> Arizona.  And of course coming out can wait.  Coming out in high school anywhere would be stupid.


 Hey hey. I came out back in MIDDLE SCHOOL. It really didn't cause me many issues other than my friend's being thought as lesbian for associating with me or that one time in high school where two girls tried to beat me up. Other than that I was just THAT kid. 

It really just depends on who you are. I never felt ashamed or scared due to my sexuality. It just was what it was.


----------



## itswhatido20 (Jan 19, 2011)

Considering I spent jr high & hs in a school that usually had 50-70 ppl on average, I'm sure I'd been the only one out. Given if I did know for sure I was bi, I probably would have came out.


----------



## Hir (Jan 19, 2011)

okay since coming out this guy hasn't left me alone and he's creepy and he's very keen to tell me he's gay too

idk what to do guys help :[


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## itswhatido20 (Jan 19, 2011)

DarkNoctus said:


> okay since coming out this guy hasn't left me alone and he's creepy and he's very keen to tell me he's gay too
> 
> idk what to do guys help :[



Leave me alone ur not my type?


----------



## Hir (Jan 19, 2011)

tried that :T


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## Super_Tron (Jan 20, 2011)

I'm gay


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## Hir (Jan 20, 2011)

wow gtfo fag!!

(and whilst you're at it post in the right thread :V)


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## Browder (Jan 20, 2011)

DarkNoctus said:


> okay since coming out this guy hasn't left me alone and he's creepy and he's very keen to tell me he's gay too
> 
> idk what to do guys help :[


Realize that up until know he was completely, utterly, alone. Then tell him that you're not interested with that in mind.



DarkNoctus said:


> wow gtfo fag!!
> 
> (and whilst you're at it post in the right thread :V)


I think he just came out to us.


----------



## Super_Tron (Jan 20, 2011)

Wasn't really expecting that kind of response. 
But yeah, +1 post to the thread.


----------



## Nokly (Jan 20, 2011)

Super_Tron said:


> Wasn't really expecting that kind of response.
> But yeah, +1 post to the thread.


 
Don't worry about it! Most people here won't care if your gay! Especially in this thread.


----------



## Enwon (Jan 20, 2011)

I guess I'll come out... I will at least be leaving my town in a year and a half, if things do go horribly wrong.  I don't really have much to lose by being myself.  And I'm sick of not being open.  I'll probably do it slowly, let it come up naturally in conversation.  Really, in the end, I'll just stop denying it or saying I'm into girls.  No real need to rush and go around telling everybody ever.  I'm wasn't really sure about it, but I took a look at things realistically.  I'll be fine.  There are worse places out there.


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 20, 2011)

Enwon said:


> I guess I'll come out... I will at least be leaving my town in a year and a half, if things do go horribly wrong.  I don't really have much to lose by being myself.  And I'm sick of not being open.  I'll probably do it slowly, let it come up naturally in conversation.  Really, in the end, I'll just stop denying it or saying I'm into girls.  No real need to rush and go around telling everybody ever.  I'm wasn't really sure about it, but I took a look at things realistically.  I'll be fine.  There are worse places out there.


 
I hope things turn out alright for ya, good luck. 

It's best to come out to family or best friends first. Don't make it too awkward, though, when I came out to my friend I was stammering all the time and my face looked like it was going to explode, looking back it's kinda embarrassing :C


----------



## Enwon (Jan 20, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> I hope things turn out alright for ya, good luck.
> 
> It's best to come out to family or best friends first. Don't make it too awkward, though, when I came out to my friend I was stammering all the time and my face looked like it was going to explode, looking back it's kinda embarrassing :C


 
Parents have known for months.  But thanks for the advice, though.  I'll keep that in mind.


----------



## Cam (Jan 20, 2011)

Enwon said:


> I guess I'll come out... I will at least be leaving my town in a year and a half, if things do go horribly wrong.  I don't really have much to lose by being myself.  And I'm sick of not being open.  I'll probably do it slowly, let it come up naturally in conversation.  Really, in the end, I'll just stop denying it or saying I'm into girls.  No real need to rush and go around telling everybody ever.  I'm wasn't really sure about it, but I took a look at things realistically.  I'll be fine.  There are worse places out there.


 

Its not like this is something everyone is gonna all know at the same time. Sometimes it can be very slow, even. Just tell the people close to you and whoever else matters. People who mind dont matter, and the people who matter dont mind


----------



## Enwon (Jan 20, 2011)

Cam said:


> Its not like this is something everyone is gonna all know at the same time. Sometimes it can be very slow, even. Just tell the people close to you and whoever else matters. People who mind dont matter, and the people who matter dont mind


 
I know.  It will take awhile.  And that's how I want it.  I would rather end up having to deal with people one at a time on this subject.  But yeah, the last sentence is the realization I came to when I decided to do this.


----------



## Cam (Jan 20, 2011)

Enwon said:


> I know.  It will take awhile.  And that's how I want it.  I would rather end up having to deal with people one at a time on this subject.  But yeah, the last sentence is the realization I came to when I decided to do this.



Thats how I did it. Ive been out for a whiiile, and I still get asked if im bi. 

Just dont be afraid of people, and itll go alot smoother than constantly worrying what people could be judging upon you, based on a sexual preference


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## Jude (Jan 20, 2011)

I'm still, like, 1/4 of the way out of the closet. I told all of my close friends and thats it. I'd update my facebook but I really don't want my distant relatives to know right now. Maybe I'm crazy, but I was kind of hoping that it'd go around the school more or something. Gah, its slightly annoying, everything is the same as before.


----------



## Cam (Jan 20, 2011)

Jude said:


> I'm still, like, 1/4 of the way out of the closet. I told all of my close friends and thats it. I'd update my facebook but I really don't want my distant relatives to know right now. Maybe I'm crazy, but I was kind of hoping that it'd go around the school more or something. Gah, its slightly annoying, everything is the same as before.


 
I never changed my facebook over it. I never really cared if people on facebook knew I was bi or not.

If it matters to anyone, its the people you see outside of the internet. Although you obviously see relatives outside the internet, theres no need to broadcast it to everyone. Thats what word of mouth is for


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 20, 2011)

Jude said:


> I'm still, like, 1/4 of the way out of the closet. I told all of my close friends and thats it. I'd update my facebook but I really don't want my distant relatives to know right now. Maybe I'm crazy, but I was kind of hoping that it'd go around the school more or something. Gah, its slightly annoying, everything is the same as before.


 
Sweet. 

I really don't have the balls to come out to anyone else. I just don't really feel the need to yet, also considering that my neighborhood's quite homophobic, and one of my best friends is seriously homophobic, he will probably accept me over time for being Gay, I've made it pretty obvious to him in the past by purposely taking advantage of his homophobia to make him uncomfortable xD 

But good luck, though, coming out at a High School environment is pretty hard. While I don't recommend it, if it's what you feel is right, go for it.


----------



## Jude (Jan 20, 2011)

Cam said:


> I never changed my facebook over it. I never really cared if people on facebook knew I was bi or not.
> 
> If it matters to anyone, its the people you see outside of the internet. Although you obviously see relatives outside the internet, theres no need to broadcast it to everyone. Thats what word of mouth is for


 
Yeah, true. I know all of my facebook friends (well, most of them) in real life. I don't know, it'd just be an easier way to get it across. I was hoping my friends could spread it around or something so maybe I could eventually get in contact with an interested party. The last thing I want to do it go around with a flag telling everyone "I'M GAY!" or "I'M BI!".



Darkwing said:


> Sweet.
> 
> I really don't have the balls to  come out to anyone else. I just don't really feel the need to yet, also  considering that my neighborhood's quite homophobic, and one of my best  friends is seriously homophobic, he will probably accept me over time  for being Gay, I've made it pretty obvious to him in the past by  purposely taking advantage of his homophobia to make him uncomfortable  xD
> 
> But good luck, though, coming out at a High School  environment is pretty hard. While I don't recommend it, if it's what you  feel is right, go for it.



Oh, lol at the the bit with your friend. My school has to be the gayest straight school ever. Every straight guy acts gay to make other people feel uncomfortable. This is particularly evident in the weightlifting locker rooms.


----------



## Cam (Jan 20, 2011)

Jude said:


> Yeah, true. I know all of my facebook friends (well, most of them) in real life. I don't know, it'd just be an easier way to get it across. I was hoping my friends could spread it around or something so maybe I could eventually get in contact with an interested party. The last thing I want to do it go around with a flag telling everyone "I'M GAY!" or "I'M BI!".


 
Thats a valid point. If you wanna be able to flirt with the same gender, its gotta be atleast a little well known that you are who you are. But that obviously doesnt bar you from being able to, but it helps.

Also key advice for anyone, actually make sure the person you like is into the same sex, nothing sucks worse than hitting on someone only to find out they are straight ;_;


----------



## Jude (Jan 20, 2011)

Cam said:


> Thats a valid point. If you wanna be able to flirt with the same gender, its gotta be atleast a little well known that you are who you are. But that obviously doesnt bar you from being able to, but it helps.
> 
> Also key advice for anyone, actually make sure the person you like is into the same sex, nothing sucks worse than hitting on someone only to find out they are straight ;_;


 
I wouldn't flirt with anyone unless I am sure. If I am unsure, I wouldn't "flirt", but I would just be friendly towards them and try to find out later. So far, only one person turned out to be gay.


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 20, 2011)

Jude said:


> Oh, lol at the the bit with your friend. My school has to be the gayest straight school ever. Every straight guy acts gay to make other people feel uncomfortable. This is particularly evident in the weightlifting locker rooms.



Nah, it's like this at all schools, it's just jock stuff really. 



Cam said:


> Thats a valid point. If you wanna be able to flirt with the same gender, its gotta be atleast a little well known that you are who you are. But that obviously doesnt bar you from being able to, but it helps.
> 
> Also key advice for anyone, actually make sure the person you like is into the same sex, nothing sucks worse than hitting on someone only to find out they are straight ;_;


 
Hehe, I dunno, personally I go right out there and flirt. I do it very subtly though, and not obvious to the point where I'll be slapped. 

There was this one guy last year that I seriously crushed for, he had cute eyes and long silky hair. We used to flirt, actually, but in the end it turned out to be bromance shit when I tried taking things to a relationship level with him. Guuuh, if only he was Gay x'c Thankfully, he kept my sexuality a secret, and I can't thank him enough for that. 

I'll admit, I've had some terrible disappointments. All of the guys I went for turned out being straight, with a girlfriend XC But for some reason I don't regret it, because hey, I tried and that's better than nothing.


----------



## RayO_ElGatubelo (Jan 20, 2011)

I'm bisexual but I'm not coming out to my family unless and if I ever go out with a same-sex partner here in Puerto Rico.


----------



## Cam (Jan 20, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Nah, it's like this at all schools, it's just jock stuff really.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Bromance?  He couldn't tell the difference from you flirting with him and you just being _super_ friendly? Wow that sucks, hes either an idiot, or you're doing it a little _too_ subtly xD

I always end up trying to hook up with the straight guy, and it sucks ._. But I'm into non flamboyant boys, so its hard to tell sometimes. According to almost everyone irl, I'm the straightest bi kid ever :3c


----------



## Jude (Jan 20, 2011)

Cam said:


> Bromance?  He couldn't tell the difference from you flirting with him and you just being _super_ friendly? Wow that sucks, hes either an idiot, or you're doing it a little _too_ subtly xD
> 
> I always end up trying to hook up with the straight guy, and it sucks ._. But I'm into non flamboyant boys, so its hard to tell sometimes. According to almost everyone irl, I'm the straightest bi kid ever :3c


 
I don't know man... the way you type sometimes makes you come off as a total fag 

Yep, I don't like flamers either. I see two or three around the school and I don't even want to go there.


----------



## Cam (Jan 20, 2011)

Jude said:


> I don't know man... the way you type sometimes makes you come off as a total fag


 
Yea but I totally do that on purpose :3c If you knew me outside of the interwebz then you'd know what im talking about.

Feminine in boys is a HUGE turnoff, yuck


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 20, 2011)

Cam said:


> Bromance?  He couldn't tell the difference from you flirting with him and you just being _super_ friendly? Wow that sucks, hes either an idiot, or you're doing it a little _too_ subtly xD


 
Nah, I dunno. It seemed to me like he knew what I was hinting at, and he played along with it for a while so that he wouldn't hurt my feelings. The kid was a real tease to me as well, hugging me and whatnot. But it was worth it, and I actually felt loved for once. 

I usually just stare at him/wink at him during class, compliment him a lot, talk to him, sometimes touch his hair and hug him. Guuh, he was really cute >.< 

I've asked him out to go play ping pong with me once, he said no and I tried to convince him otherwise by flirting a little. 

One day I decided to give him cute nicknames like, "Cutie" and whatnot, and when I called him "Cutie" he was like, "Wow, I have never been called that before" and then there was an awkward moment and we were just staring at each other and then I got really close to him and blushed, got really nervous and dashed off. He was calling my name as I ran off but I didn't care, I was just too nervous to talk. We never talked for a year until a few months ago, when we did he really hinted to me that he knew what I was up to, flirting with me and then afterwards saying "Hehehe, no homo, no homo". From there, we never talked again besides the occasional "Hi". 



Jude said:


> Yep, I don't like flamers either. I see two or three around the school and I don't even want to go there.



This. There was a flamer in my school last year who was openly Gay, he wore makeup and all, I've heard some rumors about him and it sounded like he was hot but when I met him he was seriously fat. Yeeeeah, no xC  



Cam said:


> Feminine in boys is a HUGE turnoff, yuck


 
Feminism is really cute in small doses. I prefer my guys kinda girly, it's really cute as long as they aren't wearing makeup and shit.


----------



## Cam (Jan 21, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> *long ass story*


 
That pretty interesting  Ive never seen a guy play along that well and be straight. He has closet in him, I can almost guarantee you that; No straight guy could ever even pretend to be that gay :3



Darkwing said:


> Feminism is really cute  in small doses. I prefer my guys kinda girly, it's really cute as long  as they aren't wearing makeup and shit.



I cant stand it >< If I wanted girlishness then i'll go find a vagina. I like guys who basically seem straight, which is hard as a motherfucker, but they're around


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 21, 2011)

Cam said:


> That pretty interesting  Ive never seen a guy play along that well and be straight. He has closet in him, I can almost guarantee you that; No straight guy could ever even pretend to be that gay :3


 
Yeah, that's what I thought. But he has a girlfriend who he really likes, and plans on sticking with her for a long time. So yeah :C I'm fine, though, got over him long ago and moved on and stuff, but yeah, he was really nice. 



Cam said:


> I cant stand it >< If I wanted girlishness  then i'll go find a vagina. I like guys who basically seem straight,  which is hard as a motherfucker, but they're around


 
Meh, more for me then. 

And yes, straight-acting Gays are actually pretty hard to find come to think of it =/


----------



## Cam (Jan 21, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Yeah, that's what I thought. But he has a girlfriend who he really likes, and plans on sticking with her for a long time. So yeah :C I'm fine, though, got over him long ago and moved on and stuff, but yeah, he was really nice.



Hes bi, Ill bet theoretical money on it :V



Darkwing said:


> Meh, more for me then.
> 
> And yes, straight-acting Gays are actually pretty hard to find come to think of it =/



You can have them, I dont need them :3

And they are, so I usually just hook up with girls until one comes along, and they eventually do


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## Jude (Jan 21, 2011)

Masculinity, femininity, its all good :3


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## Enwon (Jan 24, 2011)

So much for that.  Lets just say the wrong things happened at the wrong time and as a result I'm not really in a position to come out anytime in the next few weeks.


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## Cam (Jan 25, 2011)

Enwon said:


> So much for that. Lets just say the wrong things happened at the wrong time and as a result I'm not really in a position to come out anytime in the next few weeks.



Already?  That was pretty fucking fast


----------



## Enwon (Jan 25, 2011)

Cam said:


> Already?  That was pretty fucking fast


 
It takes a girl less than 10 seconds to ask a guy out.  And it takes a guy only 1 weekend to waffle about the decision and wonder whether it's even fair to say no to someone with a nice personality just because they aren't physically attractive.  And then it takes one bad setting for the guy to be unable to make something be casual and admit to said girl the truth about his sexuality and instead be sucked into the beginnings of a romantic relationship that he is not even a little bit sure about.

EDIT: That was resolved fast.  I told her I am gay and that I only want to go as friends.  So yeah, I guess I am now starting.


----------



## ninjarottwiler (Jan 25, 2011)

i finally came out as bi last year and it didnt exactly go over as well as i had hoped, now i had just moved to this new town and i decided a fresh start would be nice and i could really be me. well im a highschool student so i told people there and really began to get into the swing of being open about it all after years of quote unquote "being in the closet" and the first thing that happened is the most cruel guys there found me while walking home from school while i was behind a safeway and they beat the shit out of me cracking a rib, breaking my nose, giving me a concussion, and kicking cartledge out of my ear while i was on the ground. 
im not trying to whine about my problems i just wanted to tell some people i thought could understand and hear any tips for avoiding this again (i have already packed up and left there and im very wary where i am now) v.v


----------



## Enwon (Jan 25, 2011)

ninjarottwiler said:


> i finally came out as bi last year and it didnt exactly go over as well as i had hoped, now i had just moved to this new town and i decided a fresh start would be nice and i could really be me. well im a highschool student so i told people there and really began to get into the swing of being open about it all after years of quote unquote "being in the closet" and the first thing that happened is the most cruel guys there found me while walking home from school while i was behind a safeway and they beat the shit out of me cracking a rib, breaking my nose, giving me a concussion, and kicking cartledge out of my ear while i was on the ground.
> im not trying to whine about my problems i just wanted to tell some people i thought could understand and hear any tips for avoiding this again (i have already packed up and left there and im very wary where i am now) v.v


 
Where were you when this happened?  What kind of school was this at?  How did you come out?  Did you have any friends?  How popular were you?  How old were you?

I mean, you had to have done something wrong for this violence to happen.  Homophobic violence doesn't just randomly happen.


----------



## ninjarottwiler (Jan 25, 2011)

behind a safeway, a small highschool in vancuver washington, i just told some people i knew and word spread prety fast, around 5, and i wasnt popular at all
there was also a very annoying and odd tipe of cristian who were half way between omish and cathloc


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 25, 2011)

Enwon said:


> That was resolved fast.  I told her I am gay and that I only want to go as friends.  So yeah, I guess I am now starting.


 
Good, it's a bit pressuring being a Gay guy in a straight relationship. I'd do the same, girls really don't care about weather or not a guy's Gay, usually they keep it a secret. Of course this doesn't apply to all girls, some of them will gossip about it. 



ninjarottwiler said:


> i just wanted to tell some people i thought could understand and hear any tips for avoiding this again (i have already packed up and left there and im very wary where i am now) v.v


 
How to avoid it again? My advice would be to come out slow, y'know, tell one friend at a time, starting with the friend you trust most. Don't ever tell a whole group of people that you're Gay at the same time, because gossip and rumors WILL spread, and it will get to the homophobic people too, which is probably what resulted in you getting beat up. 

I'm not saying you WILL get beat up if you come out to everyone, but be careful about it, especially if you don't know everybody in the neighborhood you're in.



Enwon said:


> I mean, you had to have done something wrong for  this violence to happen.  Homophobic violence doesn't just randomly  happen.


 
Homophobic violence can happen once the word gets around to the homophobic people. What he did wrong is that he came out to a whole group of people at once, instead of just going easy and taking it slow with one person at a time.


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## ninjarottwiler (Jan 25, 2011)

thank you
darkwing you also have a very cute avi piccy


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## Darkwing (Jan 25, 2011)

ninjarottwiler said:


> thank you
> darkwing you also have a very cute avi piccy


 
Np. 

And thanks, I know, I love this avi xD


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## Sauvignon (Jan 25, 2011)

I'M GAY


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## ninjarottwiler (Jan 25, 2011)

*hugs and nuzzles him* 
so nice  you are


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## Sauvignon (Jan 25, 2011)

There, now the internet knows. I guess that's all that really matters.


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 25, 2011)

ninjarottwiler said:


> *hugs and nuzzles him*
> so nice  you are


 
Yes, my avi is indeed snuggle-able. 

Let's keep it an advice thread, though =I


----------



## ninjarottwiler (Jan 25, 2011)

hokay


----------



## Skittle (Jan 25, 2011)

So recently I started gender therapy and I plan on moving back home around April-May when it is over. However before I move home I plan on changing my name (cheaper here), changing my social security card gender as well as my passport. Then when I move back to NJ and get my license changed I will have a new name AND gender. Here is my dilemma....

My mother knows about me being transgender and starting to transition. However, I do not know if she has told my step dad and I know sure as hell that my dad as well as that whole side of my family does not know. I have about... two months to tell them before I absolutely HAVE to tell them. I would rather tell them before all of that so they don't feel like a brick was chucked at their skulls. I plan on coming out to my aunt and my godfather first, since they are the most accepting, in the near future. 

I know most of you guys here are bi/gay/etc. but do you have any suggestions?


----------



## Sauvignon (Jan 25, 2011)

Let them figure it out.


----------



## Darkwing (Jan 25, 2011)

skittle said:


> So recently I started gender therapy and I plan on moving back home around April-May when it is over. However before I move home I plan on changing my name (cheaper here), changing my social security card gender as well as my passport. Then when I move back to NJ and get my license changed I will have a new name AND gender. Here is my dilemma....
> 
> My mother knows about me being transgender and starting to transition. However, I do not know if she has told my step dad and I know sure as hell that my dad as well as that whole side of my family does not know. I have about... two months to tell them before I absolutely HAVE to tell them. I would rather tell them before all of that so they don't feel like a brick was chucked at their skulls. I plan on coming out to my aunt and my godfather first, since they are the most accepting, in the near future.
> 
> I know most of you guys here are bi/gay/etc. but do you have any suggestions?


 
I dunno, but if you're gonna come out, it's best to go one at a time and come out to the people you trust most first. 

Good luck, though, that's all the advice I really have.


----------



## ninjarottwiler (Jan 25, 2011)

all i can say is good luck and you have all of us on here there for you


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## Enwon (Jan 27, 2011)

Well, I came out to one of my friends.  It was not bad at all.  I almost came out to my best friend.

The girl who got infatuated with me will be told that I'm gay.  People who ask why will be told that I'm gay.  It could end up being the catalyst for me coming out to many people I know.

The friend I came out to said that it wasn't even that surprising... he didn't see it coming but it made sense now that he thought about it.  I've rejected every girl who has come my way and I'm big on gay rights.


----------



## LobTiger (Jan 29, 2011)

I'm Bi. But still "in the closet" about it. My issue is people (especially my parents) thinking Bi=Crazy sex fun time, and that's the only reason why I'd say I'm bi.
And some of my more close-minded friends saying I AM gay, just don't want to admit it. >_>
Luckily, I'm not dating anyone at the moment so...yeah. Been a strange situation for me.
I told a couple friends, a few were fine with it since they have plenty of other gay/bi friends, another doesn't really care.
So...yeah...


----------



## CaptainCool (Jan 29, 2011)

yesterday i told my mum that i have a boyfriend. everything went better than expected :3
i knew that she wouldnt be pissed but she claimed that she "knew it all along" 
no idea how my dad will react though XD but im sure that he will understand, we have always been something like bffs.
my mom plans to prepare him a little before she tells him. he is a pretty conservative guy, telling him directly is not a good plan


----------



## Commiecomrade (Jan 29, 2011)

CaptainCool said:


> yesterday i told my mum that i have a boyfriend. everything went better than expected :3
> i knew that she wouldnt be pissed but she claimed that she "knew it all along"
> no idea how my dad will react though XD but im sure that he will understand, we have always been something like bffs.
> my mom plans to prepare him a little before she tells him. he is a pretty conservative guy, telling him directly is not a good plan



That's very good to hear. I hope everything goes as planned with your dad.


----------



## Blutide (Feb 12, 2011)

Well came out years ago, but now going into the military....I keep to myself.


I totally fail at these threads, because its like " Hi, yeah I am. You? "

Bah lol.


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 13, 2011)

InsaneNight said:


> Well came out years ago, but now going into the military....I keep to myself.


 
You do know that DADT is pretty much repealed now?


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Feb 13, 2011)

I told my parents in 2009 and I don't think they believed me. Oh well, I'll get back to them on that in the future.
And one of my friends who I told even earlier than that and he said it was just a phase. I'll get back to him on it at some point also.


----------



## Skittle (Feb 13, 2011)

I recently came out to my uncle to get advice on coming out to my dad. It went really really well. He didn't give me any real advice (just be forward, haha) but, it was nice to know I have his support.

I love how the first question that comes up is if I am planning on having any surgery. ._.


----------



## Blutide (Feb 13, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> You do know that DADT is pretty much repealed now?


 
Yes I know its repealed, but still in that line of work. You keep to yourself...That and I want it that way, just so then I don't get funny looks.


----------



## Tango (Feb 13, 2011)

I'm straight but I had a friend of mine who I had known since 3rd grade (we're still close even though he lives in Florida and I'm in Maine) come out to me. I told him "Yeah, I already knew. No big deal." Guess I have really good 'gay-dar' for a straight guy.


----------



## Tango (Feb 13, 2011)

InsaneNight said:


> Yes I know its repealed, but still in that line of work. You keep to yourself...That and I want it that way, just so then I don't get funny looks.


 
Shit, I knew plenty of people in the Marines I could of dimed out for being gay if I was a homophobic asshole. It just wasn't any of my business. It's not like they were obsessively hitting on me (I look like a young Mr. Bean) or anything. Besides, the best soldiers ever were Spartans.


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Feb 13, 2011)

Tango_D said:


> I'm straight but I had a friend of mine who I had known since 3rd grade (we're still close even though he lives in Florida and I'm in Maine) come out to me. I told him "Yeah, I already knew. No big deal." Guess I have really good 'gay-dar' for a straight guy.


 Use this power for good, not for evil.


----------



## Blutide (Feb 14, 2011)

Tango_D said:


> Shit, I knew plenty of people in the Marines I could of dimed out for being gay if I was a homophobic asshole. It just wasn't any of my business. It's not like they were obsessively hitting on me (I look like a young Mr. Bean) or anything. Besides, the best soldiers ever were Spartans.


 

Well, I guess your a nice person then. In my world I would run into the homophobia crowd....not that I act that way, but it would make me uncomfortable.


----------



## Milo (Feb 19, 2011)

Enwon said:


> Well, I came out to one of my friends.  It was not bad at all.  I almost came out to my best friend.
> 
> The girl who got infatuated with me will be told that I'm gay.  People who ask why will be told that I'm gay.  It could end up being the catalyst for me coming out to many people I know.
> 
> The friend I came out to said that it wasn't even that surprising... he didn't see it coming but it made sense now that he thought about it.  I've rejected every girl who has come my way and I'm big on gay rights.


 
lol yea, for a few years before coming out, I sort of asked a bunch of questions as to how people felt about gay people. one of my friends specifically was into all those punk fads or whatever. I don't even know, but basically he dressed semi-girly, and got called gay a lot. I asked him if that offended him and he said "I could care less" 

I guess that's how I got the courage.


----------



## ThreeDawg (Feb 21, 2011)

Alright. So here I am, wondering to myself, what the HELL am I doing, posting this up, and asking advice to complete strangers I dont know.

I still dont bloody know, but I will continue anyway.

I am in the middle of bloody Confusion Central. I, myself, am what you could call Sexually Confused. I have no clue what I am. I am clunky around girls, in the end, not quite caring about them, and as well, with men, I am extremely uncomfortable with ( Rubbing Shoulders. Once had a known gay do this to me, and I near screamed my head off, and made for the bloody hills.) In any case, you can see my predicament.

The fact remains, I dont know what I am. I can look at both sides, just sit there for almost five minutes, and at times, feel attracted to both.

What I think I am asking, in this time of confusion, is what am I? Am I Gay? Straight? Bi? Somebigcomplicatedtermthatisalmostaslongasthisnospacesentance?

Help a confused 18 year old out?


----------



## Browder (Feb 21, 2011)

ThreeDawg

Stop worrying about stupid things and just enjoy yourself in with whomever and however you want. Labels like gay, bi, and straight count as stupid things.


----------



## israfur (Feb 21, 2011)

I told my sister that I am transgendered and she didn't believe me. Both funny and sad, but whatev. xD
I sort of gave some obvious hints about my inner tran to my mother, and it went really well. She told me that regardless of what gender I came to this world as, she'd always have my back. Didn't really flat out tell her about it though, but then... I didn't feel that there was a real need to at that point. <3
As for sexuality, I'm a Pansexual. I'm much more worried about being discovered as a tran, than being discovered as a pansexual. Weird, I know. ^^;




My father was not a similar story however. 
He eavesdropped on a bit of conversation I was having with a pal, (somewhere a long the lines of me saying _"don't feel uncomfortable about being gay, it's pretty normal"_) And just like that he turned on me.
He took my family out to a restaurant and everything was going beautiful, then out of no where he ambushed me with insults and said a lot of close-minded things. In front of everyone.
He didn't even know that I was trans, and didn't ask if I gay/bi/straight.
Soon after that he became abusive and I moved out.
We haven't spoken in years (that was his choice)


It wasn't my plan to tell him _ever_, but now I can see how bad he really is. 
It's a big warning I give out to everyone who's about to come out to there families: EVALUATE how bad/close-minded they are, cus sometimes it isn't like the movies where everyone cries and accepts you, group hug.
And if you have a supportive family, God speed to you. We need more people like this.<3


----------



## Spatel (Feb 21, 2011)

@ThreeDawg - Perfectly normal. Lots of bi/pans go through life not knowing what the fuck. Personally, I thought I was straight until the past couple years. It never even occurred to me that I was anything else. I was unsure about the realization for a month--didn't want to make any premature announcements. I wasn't sure if anything I felt was genuine, or if I contrived it as a convenient way to sidestep other problems in my life. Then I grew to embrace it and I stopped caring about labels.

I consider gender roles and sexuality boundaries obsolete anyway.


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 21, 2011)

Milo said:


> lol yea, for a few years before coming out, I sort of asked a bunch of questions as to how people felt about gay people. one of my friends specifically was into all those punk fads or whatever. I don't even know, but basically he dressed semi-girly, and got called gay a lot. I asked him if that offended him and he said "I could care less"
> 
> I guess that's how I got the courage.



How did the people in your school react to you being Gay when you came out? 

Personally, I'm absolutely scared of coming out at my school. My school is very homophobic, there's a lot of guys out there who would love to beat the shit out of a Gay guy because they are "not normal" or whatever.

If the word ever got out about my sexuality, I'm definitely dropping out and going elsewhere, I've already had some threats/hostility already from people simply suspecting me of being Gay =I 



ThreeDawg said:


> Alright. So here I am, wondering to myself, what the HELL am I doing, posting this up, and asking advice to complete strangers I dont know.
> 
> I still dont bloody know, but I will continue anyway.
> 
> ...



Don't worry about it, don't even think about it. Just go with the flow of things. 

My advice is to try experimenting a little with both, and see how it goes from there. 



israfur said:


> I told my sister that I am transgendered and she didn't believe me. Both funny and sad, but whatev. xD
> I sort of gave some obvious hints about my inner tran to my mother, and it went really well. She told me that regardless of what gender I came to this world as, she'd always have my back. Didn't really flat out tell her about it though, but then... I didn't feel that there was a real need to at that point. <3
> As for sexuality, I'm a Pansexual. I'm much more worried about being discovered as a tran, than being discovered as a pansexual. Weird, I know. ^^;
> 
> ...


 
Ouch, sorry to hear about your father, that must be terrible to deal with. 

Thankfully, my parents love me and support me no matter what, and they don't mind Gays at all (As long as they don't flaunt it lol). So I'd imagine coming out to them would be awkward, but smooth x3


----------



## israfur (Feb 21, 2011)

Ah, that's great Darkwing!!
Yeah my father's a shithead, I realized later that it was better for him to break contact with me. I've been a lot happier since then. (b'-')b
Thank goodness I can at least lean on one of my parents.<3


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 21, 2011)

israfur said:


> Ah, that's great Darkwing!!
> Yeah my father's a shithead, I realized later that it was better for him to break contact with me. I've been a lot happier since then. (b'-')b
> Thank goodness I can at least lean on one of my parents.<3


 
Well it's nice to hear that things are going good for you. 

I've only came out to one of my friends and he doesn't believe me at all because I'm not [insert stereotypes here] x3


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Feb 21, 2011)

Last night I decided it would be a good idea to hint to my mother that I'm more female than male... 
Guess what it wasn't... 
a good idea... :/
I should've known though... she freaked the fuck out when she found out I was bi... >_>


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Feb 22, 2011)

Nekomimi said:


> Flurgalrugathaigakjclapoqhuio.
> That is all.



shitpost much?


----------



## Spatel (Feb 22, 2011)

Bloodshot_Eyes said:


> Last night I decided it would be a good idea to hint to my mother that I'm more female than male...
> Guess what it wasn't...
> a good idea... :/
> I should've known though... she freaked the fuck out when she found out I was bi... >_>


 
Mothers can be tough... really tough.


----------



## MrWolfeh (Feb 22, 2011)

I came out as being bi first as i thought i was bi then. I was having a pretty hard time due to alot of things going wrong for me, it all kinda built up and i needed someone to talk to. I told my twin brother first, he seemed a bit shocked at first which is understandable, then a few minutes after i told him i was a fur and he didn't seem to mind at all. 

After a day or so he said he thought it was really weird and didn't like having to keep it a secret, he acted as if it was some huge burden on him which kinda pissed me off. Not all that long after...maybe a week, i told my dad (which i never thought i'd do). I was crying and was pretty upset but he seemed to take it pretty well, he didn't seem annoyed, angry or disappointed at all which was a relief.

I didn't want to tell my mother, at least not for a long time but i ended up telling her around a month ago. She took it pretty bad at first and drunk nearly a 10 glass bottle of vodka the day after, made me feel awesome. She was acting erratically and was snapping at everyone for a few days then one day she sat me down and we talked about it. She's fine, or at least seems to be fine with it now which is a huge relief for me.


----------



## Nekomimi (Feb 22, 2011)

Randy-Darkshade said:


> shitpost much?



No...I didn't shitpost.  I was just annoyed that people think they have to "come out" as a furry while it is clearly a hobby.  By expressing my exasperation, I said "Flurgalrugathaigakjclapoqhuio"... like typing random keys because you're annoyed...if that makes any sense...either that or I'm crazy.

EDIT: I thought this thread was about coming out of the closet as a furry...I never bother to read comments:/
Soy tan estÃºpido...XD
Sorry bout' that!


----------



## Hir (Feb 22, 2011)

Randy-Darkshade said:


> shitpost much?


 
the irony is

so was that

technically anyway


so was this

:]

*comment about twigs*




Nekomimi said:


> No...I didn't shitpost.  I was just annoyed that people think they have to "come out" as a furry while it is clearly a hobby.  By expressing my exasperation, I said "Flurgalrugathaigakjclapoqhuio"... like typing random keys because you're annoyed...if that makes any sense...either that or I'm crazy.


 
this thread isn't about coming out as a furry, sweetie :]


----------



## Nekomimi (Feb 22, 2011)

DarkNoctus said:


> the irony is
> 
> so was that
> 
> ...



Well I feel stupid...I just read the title XD
AND DON'T CALL MEH SWEETIE!>:O
...


----------



## Nekomimi (Feb 22, 2011)

ThreeDawg said:


> Alright. So here I am, wondering to myself, what the HELL am I doing, posting this up, and asking advice to complete strangers I dont know.
> 
> I still dont bloody know, but I will continue anyway.
> 
> ...


 
It sounds like you might be a pansexual.  
A pansexual is a person who is attracted to a man/woman regardless of their gender...simply attracted.  
Often it is called "genderless love" because it doesn't matter if it's a girl or boy.
Or you might be bi.
Don't worry though...you have plenty of time to figure this out.
Good luck.


----------



## Hir (Feb 22, 2011)

Nekomimi said:


> Well I feel stupid...I just read the title XD
> AND DON'T CALL MEH SWEETIE!>:O
> ...


 
sweetie :]


----------



## israfur (Feb 22, 2011)

Nekomimi said:


> It sounds like you might be a pansexual.
> A pansexual is a person who is attracted to a man/woman regardless of their gender...simply attracted.
> Often it is called "genderless love" because it doesn't matter if it's a girl or boy.
> Or you might be bi.
> ...


 
You forgot intersexual people (female anatomy w/ male parts, and vice versa, tranny, herm, ect ect...) 

Because it's true, the outside doesn't matter as much as what's inside for pans heh. xD


----------



## Kaath (Feb 22, 2011)

You know I'm just gonna post this to ask and see if anyone has an ideas regarding this. I act really really gay and I love cuddles and snuggling with people regardless of their gender (granted most of the time I prefer snuggling with other guys :B), yet I'm uninterested in forming love-relationships or any kind of sexual thing with either gender. What exactly would you label that sexuality wise, because I don't wanna go around telling people I'm gay or bi when I'm really kind of unsure about the whole idea...


----------



## israfur (Feb 22, 2011)

Kaath said:


> You know I'm just gonna post this to ask and see if anyone has an ideas regarding this. I act really really gay and I love cuddles and snuggling with people regardless of their gender (granted most of the time I prefer snuggling with other guys :B), yet I'm uninterested in forming love-relationships or any kind of sexual thing with either gender. What exactly would you label that sexuality wise, because I don't wanna go around telling people I'm gay or bi when I'm really kind of unsure about the whole idea...


 Friendly Asexual? =O
I mean if you are, don't be ashamed I when through an asexual phase myself. Though I wasn't really cuddly, I was more nurturing to my pals -like a mother figure heh.


----------



## Kaath (Feb 22, 2011)

israfur said:


> Friendly Asexual? =O
> I mean if you are, don't be ashamed I when through an asexual phase myself. Though I wasn't really cuddly, I was more nurturing to my pals -like a mother figure heh.



See I've been thinking about possibly being asexual, but I'm still pretty unsure about the concept; mainly because when it comes to people within the fandom, I get pretty interested. It just happens that with people outside the fandom (aka normal people <_<) I'm not.


----------



## Alphabitz Rex (Feb 22, 2011)

I didn't have a very clean 'coming out' if that's what we want to call it. Luckily for me, I'm a better fighter than most of the jerks that tried to say something to me. My dad stopped talking to me really, but I was his son so he put up with my presence and still helps me out from time to time. My mother totally gave up on me and I haven't spoken to her in years. My sister doesn't care, the rest of my family kind of cares but I'm from a redneck family in Arkansas. Honestly, though, I wouldn't have me any other way. So what, I'm a guy who likes guys. Hell, most people tell me that they can't believe I'm gay because of the way I dress and act... Behind closed doors is a different story. You love who you love.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Feb 25, 2011)

... _*GUESS WHO!!!*_


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 25, 2011)

I've decided I'm fully charged gay now, not big surprise. People heard bi and thought gay anyway. However I've found I don't seem to have any interest with anybody that's actually interested in men. Gays are getting way too flamboyant over here for my personal taste.

Not that I'm some mega macho queer-beating body builder but geez these guys with their faces thick in orange make-up don't do much for me.


----------



## Kaath (Feb 25, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> I've decided I'm fully charged gay now, not big surprise. People heard bi and thought gay anyway. However I've found I don't seem to have any interest with anybody that's actually interested in men. Gays are getting way too flamboyant over here for my personal taste.
> 
> Not that I'm some mega macho queer-beating body builder but geez these guys with their faces thick in orange make-up don't do much for me.



I hear you on that, people need to tone it down a little bit. Being a bit flamboyant is okay in my book, but It's irritating when they go out of their way and TRY to be flamboyant.


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 25, 2011)

Kaath said:


> I hear you on that, people need to tone it down a little bit. Being a bit flamboyant is okay in my book, but It's irritating when they go out of their way and TRY to be flamboyant.


 
It's even worse when they accuse me of not accepting myself for not being like them. I just tell them to stop being all gay about it, turns those orange faces bright red 

And what I'm about to say isn't an issue as such but is there such a thing as a gay guy who doesn't worship Lady Gaga?


----------



## Cam (Feb 25, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> It's even worse when they accuse me of not accepting myself for not being like them. I just tell them to stop being all gay about it, turns those orange faces bright red



The fuck. You should just deliver a swift backhand to the face, its alot more effective :>


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 25, 2011)

Cam said:


> The fuck. You should just deliver a swift backhand to the face, its alot more effective :>


 
With the amount of make-up they had on, I don't think you'd have wanted to make contact with them either.


----------



## Cam (Feb 25, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> With the amount of make-up they had on, I don't think you'd have wanted to make contact with them either.


 
Yea true. Feminine boys are a turn off...

And yet, Lady GaGa is STILL godly <3


----------



## Milo (Feb 25, 2011)

Cam said:


> Yea true. Feminine boys are a turn off...
> 
> And yet, Lady GaGa is STILL godly <3


 
thaaaaaaank you

as for the hidden text.... fuuuuuuck you D:<


----------



## Branch (Feb 25, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> is there such a thing as a gay guy who doesn't worship Lady Gaga?



*waves hand*


----------



## Cam (Feb 25, 2011)

Milo said:


> as for the hidden text.... fuuuuuuck you D:<



I have no idea what hidden text you are talking about

I still dont know what youre talking about ;3


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 25, 2011)

Branch said:


> *waves hand*


 
You don't worship everything she does? You don't randomly shout "Baby I was born this way!" at people? I'm not alone?

Today is a good day!


----------



## Milo (Feb 26, 2011)

Cam said:


> I have no idea what hidden text you are talking about
> 
> I still dont know what youre talking about ;3


 
if you mention lady gaga... *they* will come *old school movie reference*

D:


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 26, 2011)

Cam said:


> Yea true. Feminine boys are a turn off...


 
Meh, I find them REALLY cute if they pull it off right. 

Skirts, dude :3 

But yeah, makeup and stuff? Ewww... Makeup completely ruins a guy's face, lol. There was a Gay guy in my school who had TONS of makeup on his face, seriously, I never, ever, seen SO much makeup on a person's face before D:


----------



## Milo (Feb 26, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Meh, I find them REALLY cute if they pull it off right.
> 
> Skirts, dude :3
> 
> But yeah, makeup and stuff? Ewww... Makeup completely ruins a guy's face, lol. There was a Gay guy in my school who had TONS of makeup on his face, seriously, I never, ever, seen SO much makeup on a person's face before D:


 
not even skirts for me. bleh. I mean I appreciate feminine qualities, but come ON. 

I still want to slap my friend ever since he gave me a skirt and assumed I'd wear it... >:S


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 26, 2011)

Milo said:


> not even skirts for me. bleh. I mean I appreciate feminine qualities, but come ON.
> 
> I still want to slap my friend ever since he gave me a skirt and assumed I'd wear it... >:S


 
Wear it Milo! Trust me you'll look very cute in it :3 

Nah jk, looking at myself, I'd look great in a skirt considering my figure, but yeah, it just wouldn't feel comfortable for me to wear it, lol.

But yeah, when other guys do it, it's hot x3


----------



## Cain (Feb 26, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Wear it Milo! Trust me you'll look very cute in it :3
> 
> Nah jk, looking at myself, I'd look great in a skirt considering my figure, but yeah, it just wouldn't feel comfortable for me to wear it, lol.
> 
> But yeah, when other guys do it, it's hot x3


 Wait...Guys wearing skirts?


----------



## Cain (Feb 26, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Wait...Guys wearing skirts?


 
Sorry, that sounded kinda sexist


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 26, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Wait...Guys wearing skirts?


 
I believe they prefer the term "Scotsmen"


----------



## Cain (Feb 26, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> I believe they prefer the term "Scotsmen"


 
Oh, like longish skirts. The image in my head of skirts are usually mini/micro skirts. So...yeah...


----------



## greg-the-fox (Feb 26, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Wait...Guys wearing skirts?


 
You're new here, aren't you?


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 26, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Oh, like longish skirts. The image in my head of skirts are usually mini/micro skirts. So...yeah...


 
You're in the coming out thread, on FAF, talking about a Darkwing post. Expect very high levels of gay.


----------



## Cain (Feb 26, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> You're in the coming out thread, on FAF, talking about a Darkwing post. Expect very high levels of gay.


 
Hehe, and to greg-the-fox, yeah I am new, but I know that there are quite a large amount of homosexuals...What, 30%? of furrys are gay. I just blanked out. Dunno why.


----------



## Milo (Feb 26, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> talking about a Darkwing post. Expect very high levels of gay.


 
this is very ironic considering a little more than a year ago, "darkwing" and "gay" wouldn't even be in the same sentence 

anyway, last person I came out to was about 2 weeks ago. although as usual, I was forced out by my overly gay-proud friends who think outing me to everybody will make them cool simply because they have a gay best friend... 

bleh


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 26, 2011)

Milo said:


> this is very ironic considering a little more than a year ago, "darkwing" and "gay" wouldn't even be in the same sentence
> 
> anyway, last person I came out to was about 2 weeks ago. although as usual, I was forced out by my overly gay-proud friends who think outing me to everybody will make them cool simply because they have a gay best friend...
> 
> bleh


 
It's funny that whenever somebody reveals that they're infact a massive homo, I forget they ever said/ thought they were straight in the first place.

Also can you specify how exactly you were forced out in this scenario?


----------



## Cam (Feb 26, 2011)

Milo said:


> anyway, last person I came out to was about 2 weeks ago. although as usual, I was forced out by my overly gay-proud friends who think outing me to everybody will make them cool simply because they have a gay best friend...
> 
> bleh



You were forced out? That wasnt very cool of your friends, that was selfish as fuck. At least you dont seem to mind being out of the closet.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Feb 26, 2011)

Milo said:


> this is very ironic considering a little more than a year ago, "darkwing" and "gay" wouldn't even be in the same sentence
> 
> anyway, last person I came out to was about 2 weeks ago. although as usual, I was forced out by my overly gay-proud friends who think outing me to everybody will make them cool simply because they have a gay best friend...
> 
> bleh



Isn't there like, an unwritten law against outting people?


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 26, 2011)

Milo said:


> this is very ironic considering a little more than a year ago, "darkwing" and "gay" wouldn't even be in the same sentence


 
Lol, yeah x.x 

Although to be honest, I kinda knew that I was Gay all along, I was just afraid of acknowledging my attractions because of social stigma and junk. 



Milo said:


> anyway,  last person I came out to was about 2 weeks ago. although as usual, I  was forced out by my overly gay-proud friends who think outing me to  everybody will make them cool simply because they have a gay best  friend...
> 
> bleh


 
Wow, that's really not cool. 

Tell your friends to knock that shit off.


----------



## Kaath (Feb 26, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> It's even worse when they accuse me of not accepting myself for not being like them. I just tell them to stop being all gay about it, turns those orange faces bright red
> 
> And what I'm about to say isn't an issue as such but is there such a thing as a gay guy who doesn't worship Lady Gaga?



Oooh I hate people who do that crap XD

I also don't worship lady gaga. I only like two of her songs because they sound good; but overall I like making fun of her :3


----------



## greg-the-fox (Feb 26, 2011)

I think I could pull off wearing a skirt without looking too feminine, or creepy/mannish :3


----------



## Darkwing (Feb 26, 2011)

greg-the-fox said:


> I think I could pull off wearing a skirt without looking too feminine, or creepy/mannish :3


 
Hehe :3 

This is the coming out thread, though, I love skirts and stuff but let's keep this thread on-topic please.


----------



## Lemoncholic (Feb 26, 2011)

Kaath said:


> Oooh I hate people who do that crap XD
> 
> I also don't worship lady gaga. I only like two of her songs because they sound good; but overall I like making fun of her :3


 
Yeah it's not like there's anything wrong with liking some of her songs, or all of her songs even. It's the Lady Gaga for queen/ president people really. Hell I used to like most of her songs, I can only really tolerate Monster now though.



Darkwing said:


> Hehe :3
> 
> This is the coming out thread, though, I love skirts and stuff but let's keep this thread on-topic please.



Do you think a new topic about men in skirts would get locked? 

Also just to put it in there, I have somewhat muscular and hairy legs. Me and a skirt will not mix well unless I'm trying to raise money for charity by looking hilarious >.<


----------



## Browder (Feb 26, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> Do you think a new topic about men in skirts would get locked?


 
As long as you keep it PG-13 no.


----------



## Cain (Feb 27, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> Yeah it's not like there's anything wrong with liking some of her songs, or all of her songs even. It's the Lady Gaga for queen/ president people really. Hell I used to like most of her songs, I can only really tolerate Monster now though.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Put on a kilt, then you'd be the perfect scotsman! :3


----------



## Kaath (Feb 27, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> Yeah it's not like there's anything wrong with liking some of her songs, or all of her songs even. It's the Lady Gaga for queen/ president people really. Hell I used to like most of her songs, I can only really tolerate Monster now though.



Oh my god exactly! I mean to obsess over her is so weird; just because she speaks out for gay equality doesn't make her a good leader. I mean I speak out for gay equality, and if I was president: I'd literally destroy the world XD
Some people need to just tone down the obsession a teensy bit X3


----------



## Milo (Feb 27, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> It's funny that whenever somebody reveals that they're infact a massive homo, I forget they ever said/ thought they were straight in the first place.
> 
> Also can you specify how exactly you were forced out in this scenario?


 
basically whenever I'm hanging out with my friends, and I'm introduced to someone, it's always the same "this is my gay friend". I mean fuck, last time I hung out with my friend, she introduced me to her fucking mom by saying "this is my friend. he's a huge faggot". I mean she was cool with it and all but I just wanted to die for a second.

you know how it is with people. they feel the need to have a gay friend, and when they do, they display them out in front of everybody like their little toy.



greg-the-fox said:


> I think I could pull off wearing a skirt without looking too feminine, or creepy/mannish :3


 
no.... NOOOO. wear tight pants or something.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Feb 27, 2011)

Milo said:


> basically whenever I'm hanging out with my friends, and I'm introduced to someone, it's always the same "this is my gay friend". I mean fuck, last time I hung out with my friend, she introduced me to her fucking mom by saying "this is my friend. he's a huge faggot". I mean she was cool with it and all but I just wanted to die for a second.
> 
> you know how it is with people. they feel the need to have a gay friend, and when they do, they display them out in front of everybody like their little toy.


 XD


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Feb 27, 2011)

gay people are novelty items >:


----------



## Milo (Feb 27, 2011)

Teto said:


> gay people are novelty items >:


 
hey, I'm worth more than just some novelty item D:


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## Hateful Bitch (Feb 27, 2011)

Milo said:


> hey, I'm worth more than just some novelty item D:


 Best novelty item ever!


----------



## Milo (Feb 27, 2011)

Teto said:


> Best novelty item ever!


 
dawww

it's a shame you can't be as important an item as I am


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Feb 27, 2011)

Milo said:


> dawww
> 
> it's a shame you can't be as important an item as I am


 I'm a russian doll though :c


----------



## Milo (Feb 27, 2011)

Teto said:


> I'm a russian doll though :c


 
don't worry, I've been in the back room for 20 years now. nobody wants to buy me 

I would make a closet joke but it doesn't make much sense at this point :S


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## Hateful Bitch (Feb 27, 2011)

Milo said:


> don't worry, I've been in the back room for 20 years now. nobody wants to buy me
> 
> I would make a closet joke but it doesn't make much sense at this point :S


 We should be Toy Story.


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## Milo (Feb 27, 2011)

Teto said:


> We should be Toy Story.


 
I don't follow...

anyway, I wonder who in my family knows. I only came out to two people in my family, but apparently my step dad is going around telling people. aha


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## Takun (Feb 27, 2011)

>move into new house
>back into the closet


:T


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## Milo (Feb 27, 2011)

Takun said:


> >move into new house
> >back into the closet
> 
> 
> :T


 
how do you go back into the closet?

edit: nevermind. I'm not used to moving


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## Hateful Bitch (Feb 27, 2011)

Takun said:


> >move into new house
> >back into the closet
> 
> 
> :T


 break the faces of all them preps an haters bro don't be beaten dooown


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## Rouz (Feb 27, 2011)

How does anyone know that they are gay? I know this sounds stupid but I don't know. Is there anything more to it than be attracted to males? I've been attracted to lots of males and a few females. I thought if I told people I would feel better but it hasn't helped at all, in fact I think it jus made things worse. Now I have no idea what I'm gonna do with my life, or anything, because this entire thought processe takes up all my time because I'm dumb and can't take my mind off the subject. I've had sex with both, but I don't know. I consider myself bi, but it doesn't feel right. I've been in both female and male relationship and I don't get the overwhelming feeling of needing to be with them. I don't think I can reciprocate emotions to anyone at this point in my life. I feel that I'm selfish and I m starting to think I'm gonna turn into a forever alone guy. Which isn't the real case, I've had many relationships, and I'm sure more, but I can't seem to find anyone that makes me as happy as I need and want to be. I'm being a pissant about this entire thing right now, its bothering me for a long time, and it's starting to affect my class work and social life.


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## Milo (Feb 27, 2011)

Rouz said:


> How does anyone know that they are gay? I know this sounds stupid but I don't know. Is there anything more to it than be attracted to males? I've been attracted to lots of males and a few females. I thought if I told people I would feel better but it hasn't helped at all, in fact I think it jus made things worse. Now I have no idea what I'm gonna do with my life, or anything, because this entire thought processe takes up all my time because I'm dumb and can't take my mind off the subject. I've had sex with both, but I don't know. I consider myself bi, but it doesn't feel right. I've been in both female and male relationship and I don't get the overwhelming feeling of needing to be with them. I don't think I can reciprocate emotions to anyone at this point in my life. I feel that I'm selfish and I m starting to think I'm gonna turn into a forever alone guy. Which isn't the real case, I've had many relationships, and I'm sure more, but I can't seem to find anyone that makes me as happy as I need and want to be. I'm being a pissant about this entire thing right now, its bothering me for a long time, and it's starting to affect my class work and social life.



that's the thing. for the first year, I was like... a bit obsessed with coming out. it was all I thought about. now I basically just bury it in the furthest part of my brain and the only time I even bring up being gay is either in a joke or when my FUCKING friends are being douches and forcing me out >:U


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## Paul'o'fox (Feb 27, 2011)

How did H&K's post just disappear?


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## Rouz (Feb 27, 2011)

Milo said:


> that's the thing. for the first year, I was like... a bit obsessed with coming out. it was all I thought about. now I basically just bury it in the furthest part of my brain and the only time I even bring up being gay is either in a joke or when my FUCKING friends are being douches and forcing me out >:U


 
It doesn't get out of my head, like when i first started thinking about it when I was littler it didn't bother me, now I basically want to kill myself over it cause it just doesn't go away. I'll be in lecture and think its gone, but that just bring it back. I've gotten new hobbies and stuff that take time away from thinking about, I started rock climbing and after that it just comes back in my brain. I can't bury it.


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## Milo (Feb 28, 2011)

Rouz said:


> It doesn't get out of my head, like when i first started thinking about it when I was littler it didn't bother me, now I basically want to kill myself over it cause it just doesn't go away. I'll be in lecture and think its gone, but that just bring it back. I've gotten new hobbies and stuff that take time away from thinking about, I started rock climbing and after that it just comes back in my brain. I can't bury it.


 
that's seems a bit odd...

I don't really know what to say to that lol


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## Rouz (Feb 28, 2011)

Milo said:


> that's seems a bit odd...
> 
> I don't really know what to say to that lol


 I'm pretty sure its either cause I'm full of fail or have no clue what the hell I'm doing,. Maybe i'm just thiking about something that isn't true that make bothered by it. Makes me wonder why I call my brain "my brain". Cause he doesn't think about what I want to think about.


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## Paul'o'fox (Feb 28, 2011)

Paul'o'fox said:


> How did H&K's post just disappear?


Posts have just disappeared from existence and no one has even noticed?


----------



## Milo (Feb 28, 2011)

Paul'o'fox said:


> Posts have just disappeared from existence and no one has even noticed?


 
lol no, I noticed. I'm just ignoring it


----------



## Paul'o'fox (Feb 28, 2011)

Milo said:


> lol no, I noticed. I'm just ignoring it


Thank god I thought I was going crazy.


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## Milo (Feb 28, 2011)

Paul'o'fox said:


> Thank god I thought I was going crazy.


 
nope. H&K admitted to being gay, and then they erased it.... yup, that's what happened. nothing further :0


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## Lemoncholic (Feb 28, 2011)

Milo said:


> nope. H&K admitted to being gay, and then they erased it.... yup, that's what happened. nothing further :0


 
You could have had fun with that and you told him the truth?  D'awww


----------



## Milo (Feb 28, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> You could have had fun with that and you told him the truth?  D'awww


 
huh? no I was lying by pretending to tell the tr-..... oh

yea, I was telling the truth. mhm. yup


----------



## Corinne (Feb 28, 2011)

My parents are definitely super religious (Catholic) and I find myself attracted sexually to other women and men.  I have done sexual things with both genders, but have not had full blown sexual intercourse with another woman.

I am also joining the US Military, and am afraid of what they might think.

I guess you could call me bi-curious, but at this point I would rather be with a woman than a man.

The original post on this thread is an interesting read and very helpful.  Thank you for posting it.


----------



## Trance (Feb 28, 2011)

I came out to my best friend today.  He was pretty chill about it, but he told my other friend and he didn't believe him.   :U


----------



## Cam (Mar 1, 2011)

Trance said:


> I came out to my best friend today.  He was pretty chill about it, but he told my other friend and he didn't believe him.   :U


 
I had the same reaction. No one would believe me when I came out for as much as even a couple of weeks. It takes time and word of mouth for people to start believing it... but they will


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## Hir (Mar 1, 2011)

Corinne said:


> I find myself attracted sexually to other women and men.





Corinne said:


> I guess you could call me bi-curious,


 
nuh uh. bisexual love. if you're attracted to both, you're bisexual. period. or possibly pan idk. bi-curious is a load of shit.


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## Cam (Mar 1, 2011)

DarkNoctus said:


> bi-curious is a load of shit.



Not really. You can be bi-curious while still figuring out your own sexual identity. For obvious reasons you can't permanently label yourself bi-curious, but it can be a temporary label


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## Hir (Mar 1, 2011)

but he/she already admitted they had attraction to males and females, so there's no 'bi-curious' about it. I still think it's a load of rubbish anyway.


----------



## Spatel (Mar 1, 2011)

I consider bisexual more of a behavior than an indicator of what goes on in a person's mind. If someone has sought out male and female partners, then I would say they're bisexual, regardless of what went on to get them to that point. 

Reasonable?


----------



## Skittle (Mar 1, 2011)

Came out to my dad and stepdad as trans. Went a lot better than I expected. My stepdad is doing the typical parent thing and asking 394793473 questions but also did his own research before e-mailing me back. At least he is taking me seriously.

As for my dad, I don't think he quite gets it. He asked if I had considered becoming a lesbian instead. Don't think it works that way Dad, nice try though.


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## Riavis (Mar 1, 2011)

Skittle said:


> Came out to my dad and stepdad as trans. Went a lot better than I expected. My stepdad is doing the typical parent thing and asking 394793473 questions but also did his own research before e-mailing me back. At least he is taking me seriously.
> 
> As for my dad, I don't think he quite gets it. He asked if I had considered becoming a lesbian instead. Don't think it works that way Dad, nice try though.


 
Well at least there wasn't a bunch of yelling and disowning going on. I'm glad to hear it went fairly well for you!


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## Skittle (Mar 1, 2011)

Riavis said:


> Well at least there wasn't a bunch of yelling and disowning going on. I'm glad to hear it went fairly well for you!


 I did it from the safety of the internet. I sent an e-mail so only so much yelling can go on. My dad hasn't e-mailed me back after I explained the sexuality =/= gender and that I'm basically a gay dude. :C


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## Schwimmwagen (Mar 1, 2011)

Skittle said:


> Came out to my dad and stepdad as trans. Went a lot better than I expected. My stepdad is doing the typical parent thing and asking 394793473 questions but also did his own research before e-mailing me back. At least he is taking me seriously.
> 
> As for my dad, I don't think he quite gets it. He asked if I had considered becoming a lesbian instead. Don't think it works that way Dad, nice try though.


 
I have yet to say anything to my parents... My dad hates the idea of being bi as it is.


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## Corinne (Mar 1, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I have yet to say anything to my parents... My dad hates the idea of being bi as it is.


 
Same here.
I don't know how to come out.
My parents are UBER religious (High Latin mass, no sex before marriage, no contraception, no masturbation, etc.) so I'm sure they'll freak...


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## Riavis (Mar 1, 2011)

Faf has introduced me to Pan. It's given me a lot to think about, to say the least.


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## Schwimmwagen (Mar 1, 2011)

Corinne said:


> Same here.
> I don't know how to come out.
> My parents are UBER religious (High Latin mass, no sex before marriage, no contraception, no masturbation, etc.) so I'm sure they'll freak...


 
Well, it's not like you _have_ to, you know?


----------



## Corinne (Mar 1, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Well, it's not like you _have_ to, you know?


 
True.
Maybe I'll just live my life and if I end up with a girl in the long run, they'll know then. (;


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Mar 1, 2011)

Corinne said:


> True.
> Maybe I'll just live my life and if I end up with a girl in the long run, they'll know then. (;


 
That's right! You'll be too old to be bitched at for it.


----------



## Skittle (Mar 4, 2011)

So it seems like my dad, at the current moment, doesn't want to talk to me.
After I explained the whole gender =/= sexuality thing and that I identified more as a gay male, he stopped responding to my e-mails. I sent him a txt the other day asking if he got them. I got a response saying nothing past the convo a couple days ago. He asked why, I explained that I had explained something and he just went: oh. and that was it.
Normally my dad, whenever I message him, is always asking me how my day is, what is going on, etc. etc. So, for him to just kind of blow me off like this is new...
-sigh- Guess everything can't go perfectly, huh?


----------



## Nyxneko (Mar 4, 2011)

Give him some time, things that make you question yourself take time to accept. And if it turns out poorly don't worry about it, God still loves you.


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## Milo (Mar 4, 2011)

oh are we doing parents? 

lol, my dad kicked me out when I came out to him, then my mom kicked me out when I moved in with her and later came out to her. I lived with my aunt for about 6 months, then got kicked out again, was homeless for a few weeks, and then my mother brought me back in. I guess she felt guilty. I eventually got to her that being gay wasn't the worst thing in the world, although in her words, I still "break her heart" xD

coming out to my friends was different. they said "oh ok"... the response I wanted all along


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## Skittle (Mar 4, 2011)

Milo said:


> oh are we doing parents?
> 
> lol, my dad kicked me out when I came out to him, then my mom kicked me out when I moved in with her and later came out to her. I lived with my aunt for about 6 months, then got kicked out again, was homeless for a few weeks, and then my mother brought me back in. I guess she felt guilty. I eventually got to her that being gay wasn't the worst thing in the world, although in her words, I still "break her heart" xD
> 
> coming out to my friends was different. they said "oh ok"... the response I wanted all along


 :C -hug- I am so sorry. I wish I could share the tolerance my family has given me so far. It seems like my boyfriend's mom has at least partially disowned him for dating me...


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## Rouz (Mar 4, 2011)

Milo said:


> oh are we doing parents?
> 
> lol, my dad kicked me out when I came out to him, then my mom kicked me out when I moved in with her and later came out to her. I lived with my aunt for about 6 months, then got kicked out again, was homeless for a few weeks, and then my mother brought me back in. I guess she felt guilty. I eventually got to her that being gay wasn't the worst thing in the world, although in her words, I still "break her heart" xD
> 
> coming out to my friends was different. they said "oh ok"... the response I wanted all along



:c


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## Milo (Mar 4, 2011)

Skittle said:


> :C -hug- I am so sorry. I wish I could share the tolerance my family has given me so far. It seems like my boyfriend's mom has at least partially disowned him for dating me...


 
don't worry, over the years it's gotten less hostile. like once a year during christmas, I celebrate with most of my family, and my dad is usually there. we don't talk much to eachother outside of "merry christmas" xD


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## Hir (Mar 7, 2011)

my homophobic friend found out I was gay today \:3/ it was a fun experience

at first he pulled an indescribable face

so I did my best to replicate a :3c face

and he was like 'at least you don't act like a fag'

i said 'you bet babe'

he didn't find it funny!! i don't think we're friends anymore!!


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## buni (Mar 7, 2011)

The metaphor:
When I was eighteen, I said to my mother, "I think I'm gay." She said, "Well, just don't get anybody pregnant."
When I was twenty-four, I said to my mother, "I was wrong, mom; I'm really a woman." She said, "Well, just don't _get_ pregnant."

The reality:
When I was born, my mother wanted to call me Christopher Robin after the character in Winnie-the-Pooh. My father said, "Robin's a fag's name" and the subject never came up again.
When I was eighteen, I came out to my mother as a gay male and she handed me her Kirk/Spock slash and asked me what I thought of it.
When I was twenty-four, I came out to my mother as a transsexual, and she asked me what name I'd like to be called. I told her my plans to go from Christopher Eric to Kristina Robin, and she put down the phone, yelled, "I WIN" at my father, and then never used my old name again.


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## Skittle (Mar 7, 2011)

buni said:


> The metaphor:
> When I was eighteen, I said to my mother, "I think I'm gay." She said, "Well, just don't get anybody pregnant."
> When I was twenty-four, I said to my mother, "I was wrong, mom; I'm really a woman." She said, "Well, just don't _get_ pregnant."
> 
> ...


 That is...
Fuckin' epic.


----------



## Rouz (Mar 7, 2011)

buni said:


> The metaphor:
> When I was eighteen, I said to my mother, "I think I'm gay." She said, "Well, just don't get anybody pregnant."
> When I was twenty-four, I said to my mother, "I was wrong, mom; I'm really a woman." She said, "Well, just don't _get_ pregnant."
> 
> ...


^THIS


----------



## Branch (Mar 11, 2011)

buni said:


> The metaphor:
> When I was eighteen, I said to my mother, "I think I'm gay." She said, "Well, just don't get anybody pregnant."
> When I was twenty-four, I said to my mother, "I was wrong, mom; I'm really a woman." She said, "Well, just don't _get_ pregnant."
> 
> ...


 
made my day. T_T **wonders what a supportive parent(s) is like**

also: moved away from homophobic parents. they dont hate me. but they dont like me. they "love me no matter what". that's what my mother says. she also says gay men will "fuck anything with a penis and a pulse", my roommate (who is also gay) will inevitably seduce or rape me, and i will be very unhappy with this life. but-Oh! - she's "okay with it". my father says "the stupid mistakes you make in life stick with you forever" and "i'm not happy about it" and "if someome beats you up for who you are, i won't drive you home from the hospital" and "you're just doing this because you like to act stubborn and make intentionally bad decisions". yayy.


----------



## Skittle (Mar 12, 2011)

Branch said:


> made my day. T_T **wonders what a supportive parent(s) is like**
> 
> also: moved away from homophobic parents. they dont hate me. but they dont like me. they "love me no matter what". that's what my mother says. she also says gay men will "fuck anything with a penis and a pulse", my roommate (who is also gay) will inevitably seduce or rape me, and i will be very unhappy with this life. but-Oh! - she's "okay with it". my father says "the stupid mistakes you make in life stick with you forever" and "i'm not happy about it" and "if someome beats you up for who you are, i won't drive you home from the hospital" and "you're just doing this because you like to act stubborn and make intentionally bad decisions". yayy.


 What the fuck?
I will never understand parents like this, EVER.


----------



## Branch (Mar 12, 2011)

Skittle said:


> What the fuck?
> I will never understand parents like this, EVER.


 
i think it's sort of an "all gays are evil, except for you, and the few we know. everyone else is horrible, but you're probably not going to stay gay" kind of thing.

incidentally, my parents aren't religious. agnostic the both of 'em. they don't even have a "good" reason.

**edit** oh-oh! i forgot. i moved out ~ a year ago. moved again last week. new roommate is gay. i didn't intentionally choose, was a happy coincidence. i will be raped, taken advantage of, abused, and shamed, by living with someone who "shares my sexuality". or at least that's what my mother tells me. :3


----------



## Milo (Mar 13, 2011)

I always wondered what the "bad" concept is like with lesbians and parents... not in the "oh, men worship lesbians" aspect, but that most concepts of why homosexuality is so awful comes from... well penis... and asses... it's always "it's not natural to do a guy in the ass" but what is it with lesbians?

is it like "it's not natural to go down to the store, buy a strap on, and do your girlfriend"? D:


----------



## Takun (Mar 13, 2011)

Milo said:


> I always wondered what the "bad" concept is like with lesbians and parents... not in the "oh, men worship lesbians" aspect, but that most concepts of why homosexuality is so awful comes from... well penis... and asses... it's always "it's not natural to do a guy in the ass" but what is it with lesbians?
> 
> is it like "it's not natural to go down to the store, buy a strap on, and do your girlfriend"? D:


 

Probably combinations of the Butch stereotype, losing daddy's little princess, making the family look bad, religion  still, slut, etc


----------



## Darkwing (Mar 14, 2011)

Milo said:


> I always wondered what the "bad" concept is like with lesbians and parents... not in the "oh, men worship lesbians" aspect, but that most concepts of why homosexuality is so awful comes from... well penis... and asses... it's always "it's not natural to do a guy in the ass" but what is it with lesbians?
> 
> is it like "it's not natural to go down to the store, buy a strap on, and do your girlfriend"? D:


 
It's mostly the butch/man-girl stereotype. And I'm pretty sure that most girl cliques wouldn't appreciate having a lesbian included in there. There's also the whole religious stuff, family disowning and junk. I've seen such ridicule happen before. 

So believe it or not, Lesbians aren't as accepted as you think they would be. They deal with just as much shit as we do.


----------



## Oovie (Mar 15, 2011)

I came out to my mother a few nights ago, who undoubtedly has already told my step-father and select few of my family. They're all open-minded so I'm content with that.

It was a spur of the moment decision, I was having an IM conversation about* her* spiritual beliefs that spawned from an earlier email. She said by choosing to be atheist I was walking my own path, as everyone in our families (or even the world) believe in a higher power. I also have catholic and christian family, my mother being a spiritualist.

So I told her it does feel like my own path, and I can't talk to many about it else I risk them rejecting me. Then I subtlety hinted it by saying, "About a couple other things as well." 

I don't know if she picked up on it immediately or not, but she waited half way through to bring it up. I put the conversation below in a spoiler!



Spoiler: IM conversation



*
mom*: you still looking?
Oi you there ?
*me* : Yes
*mom* : did you read my reply
*me* : Somewhat, I'm reading it now.
*mom* : well you are choosing to walk your own path
However you should know hundreds of people have signed up to my site recently
So obviously I am saying something that they too feel is correct
*me *: Yes I suppose it does feel like my "own" path. I can't really talk to anyone over here about it, else I risk them rejecting me.
About a couple other things as well.
*mom *: we have not rejected you but you have to understand they too believe in a higher power
I belive in that power I know it exists
so does the rest of your family
I raised you to know that as well
I do not know where you switched off
*me *: I feel like such higher powers are playing games, and I think it's rotten.
If they exist, I shouldn't have to condition myself to see they're there. They should just reveal themselves.
I think it's more important to worry about your fellow man instead, not some dude I can't see who fancies toying and dangling us along throughout life.
*mom *: why should you need proof
you should just feel with your heart
they are not performing monkeys
and we Do see them
ask your brothers
they see them all the time
why should they make themselves known to someone who has no faith? You cannot have it both ways son
*me *: Well I do need proof, else I'm trying tricking myself into believing Santa Claus is real.
And Santa Claus is pretty sweet, the worst thing he does is give you coal for being rotten.
*mom *: you cant see the wind but it is real
you cant see electricity but your computer use it
*me *: If I put smoke into the wind I see it move.
*mom *: what happens to the energy int he body when it dies
you will beleive these things but you will not believe in Spirit
you are spirit when you die
*me *: I don't understand, you can prove wind and electricity are there though.
*mom *: your body is energy
even Albert Einstein knew that
maybe you should read him sometime
he was a scientist but even he believed in prophecy
*me *: So what is the point of all of this anyway?
*mom *: he had more going for him
*me *: Does this deal with the afterlife?
*mom *: yes we are all connected in death, birth life
*me *: Why need we worry of that? I'm alive, I'll think on the now and deal with whatever death gives me.
*mom *: explain my aura picture
there is a face in front of my own
what you do now counts
*me *: I looked that up the last time I visited, I can't remember the article on it now.
What I do now counts you're right, that's why I won't waste it on spooks and ghosts.
*mom *: I am not going to argue with you
*me *: Well I should hope not, I'm just inquiring.
*mom *: I am saddened that you have chosen not to believe but you are still my son
*me *: And why does that make you sad?
*mom *: you could have come to me ans said I am gay and I would have understood that better
because I raised you with spirit
*me *: Not quite, more like bi.
*mom *: from the time you were a little boy I raised you to understand spirit and energy
you are Bi?
*me *: Yeah, I'm not really disturbed by either.
*mom *: you have had sex with a man then?
*me *: Well not yet, but the idea doesn't bother me, as long as he isn't some hulk hairy, steroid dude.
I see quite a few guys that I think look good actually.
*mom *: How would you know if you are Bi if you havent had sex with a man?
*me *: It should disgust me if I weren't, it doesn't. I find some men sexually attractive, shouldn't that be enough?
*mom *: so what that mean nothing
until some guy sticks his penis inside your anus you are not Bi
I have been around gay men all my life'
*me *: What the... Jeez, okay sure mom.
*mom *: yes I know Gay
____ was raised around them
they were my best friends
so dont give me that please
*me *: And I don't suppose you realize I have no objections to "buttsecks"?
Do I really even need to explain this?
I'm not the one in denial over what I like/want.
*mom *: well whatever floats your boat honey
enough of this for now
You are my son but I still do not understand what happened to make you stop believing in spirit
does the rest of your family know you like guys?
*me *: I just did what you guys said because I was a clueless little kid, doesn't mean I ever believed in it. In fact I highly doubt I ever did.
Hellll no!
they would go crazy
*mom *: if you want to talk to someone I know 2 guys you can speak with
they are friends
*me *: I can't even imagine dad, that'd destroy him
*mom *: as I said I have friends if you ever want to speak to someone
they have a radio show
*me *: I haven't found those kind of people in real life, but oodles on the Internet. Though I appreciate if you have more for me.
So I don't feel odd about it.
*mom *: well I know someone who may be able to help you understand more
___
we know these guys
___ too
___ is a very nice guy
anyway I am going to leave you now
it has been a bit of a shock
I am ok with whatever you choose
I love you
*me *: What was the shock bit?
Just curious.
*mom *: the whole thing



Then she phoned me up and the jist of the conversation was:
"Why didn't you trust us enough to say anything?"
"Because it didn't even dawn on me I was looking at men alongside women until I left home. Plus I thought you hinted you knew from my last visit when you brought up the girlfriend stuff!"
"We had no idea, but it's starting to make sense. We support you, you know that."
"Well thanks Mom."

It was funny and awkward for the both of us, because I'd give her examples of who I liked and what they're wearing but she'd cut me off jokingly saying she didn't want details. She also dropped the advances on beliefs, and this really relieved me because I've said all my life I didn't believe but I'd be answered with the "it's a phase" crap.

The whole ordeal has really aspired me to start _looking around_ more, as I still have plenty of college left and I feel less restrained now since coming out. I feel happier that someone knows, I didn't feel like I was hiding but I see now the difference it's made. All that matters to me is the family that cares for me the most accepts it, and that is good enough for me.


----------



## Icky (Mar 15, 2011)

Oovie, no offense but your mom sounds really, really dumb.


----------



## Skittle (Mar 15, 2011)

"until some guy sticks his penis inside your anus you are not Bi
I have been around gay men all my life'"

....Brb, laughing forever.

Anyway.... About two weeks ago I came out to my step dad  and dad as trans. Step dad went well, yadda yadda. My dad went, alright I guess? He asked if I had considered becoming a lesbian instead and when I explained gender identity =/= sexuality and that despite being pansexual I identified as a gay man. No response after that. I txted him around last week asking if he got the e-mail in which he said yes but nothing after our previous discussion. I mentioned the one where I explained some stuff, he said oh and...that was it.

Now, my dad has always been all over me when I txt him. He is always asking what I am up to, how I am doing, etc. Should I txt him and ask if he even wants to talk to me anymore or wait it out? My birthday is in two weeks. I also want to call my mom-mom and see how she is and such however, my father lives with her. I have no idea what he has told her, if anything, etc.

Halp? :c


----------



## Oovie (Mar 15, 2011)

Icky said:


> Oovie, no offense but your mom sounds really, really dumb.


None taken, because even I feel like they're  delusional and crazy now since they became "Spiritual" :cringe:. Delusional because  this _never_ happened while I grew up (yet she claims it  did), I even thought they were agnostic up until I was 17 and all this  suddenly started. I got out of there in time though, WoW really helped me ignore them back then.

The shock seemed to put my old mom back on the phone though, and my brothers will be teenagers soon. I hope my brothers fuck it up, two teenagers? I think it'll snap them back into sanity soon. 



Skittle said:


> "until some guy sticks his penis inside your anus you are not Bi
> I have been around gay men all my life'"
> 
> ....Brb, laughing forever.


Just why I posted this, are you serious?! OuUGHgh! Seriously my reaction:


----------



## Oovie (Mar 15, 2011)

Skittle said:


> Anyway.... About two weeks ago I came out to my step dad  and dad as trans. Step dad went well, yadda yadda. My dad went, alright I guess? He asked if I had considered becoming a lesbian instead and when I explained gender identity =/= sexuality and that despite being pansexual I identified as a gay man. No response after that. I txted him around last week asking if he got the e-mail in which he said yes but nothing after our previous discussion. I mentioned the one where I explained some stuff, he said oh and...that was it.
> 
> Now, my dad has always been all over me when I txt him. He is always asking what I am up to, how I am doing, etc. Should I txt him and ask if he even wants to talk to me anymore or wait it out? My birthday is in two weeks. I also want to call my mom-mom and see how she is and such however, my father lives with her. I have no idea what he has told her, if anything, etc.
> 
> Halp? :c


I know I can't even size up to your situation, but maybe he needs just another week to let it sink in? I don't even want to talk to my parents for another two weeks until it's no longer fresh in their minds, your dad is probably still playing through memories right now of how you came to this point in your life. It seems like I've read a lot of people getting rejected immediately, then their parents come to terms with it in time.

I think when the time comes you could very respectfully remind him of how much you two used to talk, that you miss it, and you're worried your announcement has had some hand in his silence. It's been a few weeks since I've heard from you and as your kid I just want to know if everything's alright?

Maybe post what you want to say here first so people can critique it?


----------



## Skittle (Mar 15, 2011)

Oovie said:


> I know I can't even size up to your situation, but maybe he needs just another week to let it sink in? I don't even want to talk to my parents for another two weeks until it's no longer fresh in their minds, your dad is probably still playing through memories right now of how you came to this point in your life. It seems like I've read a lot of people getting rejected immediately, then their parents come to terms with it in time.
> 
> I think when the time comes you could very respectfully remind him of how much you two used to talk, that you miss it, and you're worried your announcement has had some hand in his silence. It's been a few weeks since I've heard from you and as your kid I just want to know if everything's alright?
> 
> Maybe post what you want to say here first so people can critique it?


 Maybe. I came out through e-mail since that wasn't addressed in my original post. I do horrible talking to people, even if it is over the phone. My dad and I were never super close but he was a totally cool guy in his own right. He was the one who got me into video games and such. I would hate to lose him over this...


----------



## Oovie (Mar 15, 2011)

Skittle said:


> Maybe. I came out through e-mail since that wasn't addressed in my original post. I do horrible talking to people, even if it is over the phone. My dad and I were never super close but he was a totally cool guy in his own right. He was the one who got me into video games and such. I would hate to lose him over this...


 I might have to take back the whole critique thing, if that's the email you sent in your LiveJournal then that was wonderfully written no joke.

I can't tell that he's upset because he seemed genuinely concerned, but it appears he might still be really lost and confused trying to take it all in. I'd just continue being very delicate with your emails while this is still a bit new to him. I'm not sure you've lost him yet, I think most people voice that immediately?


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## Skittle (Mar 15, 2011)

Oovie said:


> I might have to take back the whole critique thing, if that's the email you sent in your LiveJournal then that was wonderfully written no joke.
> 
> I can't tell that he's upset because he seemed genuinely concerned, but it appears he might still be really lost and confused trying to take it all in. I'd just continue being very delicate with your emails while this is still a bit new to him. I'm not sure you've lost him yet, I think most people voice that immediately?


 Yup. That very e-mail. I had a couple people look it over and help me with it before I sent it out. I haven't sent him an e-mail since the day after coming out.


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## Milo (Mar 16, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> It's mostly the butch/man-girl stereotype. And I'm pretty sure that most girl cliques wouldn't appreciate having a lesbian included in there. There's also the whole religious stuff, family disowning and junk. I've seen such ridicule happen before.
> 
> So believe it or not, Lesbians aren't as accepted as you think they would be. They deal with just as much shit as we do.


 
my intention wasn't to make it sound like they get special treatment. woops D:

I just think it's a bit funny. like when you hear the word "homosexual" you can't help but think of two men rather than two women.


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## Darkwing (Mar 16, 2011)

Milo said:


> I just think it's a bit funny. like when you hear the word "homosexual" you can't help but think of two men rather than two women.


 
It's mostly because of how the media perceives the LGBT community. You almost never hear about Lesbians in the media, but you always hear about gay/bi dudes.


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## Lemoncholic (Mar 16, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> It's mostly because of how the media perceives the LGBT community. You almost never hear about Lesbians in the media, but you always hear about gay/bi dudes.


 
Lesbians don't tend to shoot rainbows out of their buttholes. Their stereotypical voices also don't attract as much attention/ annoy people as much and since lesbians have been every guys fantasy for years now I guess it's not as "taboo"?


----------



## Milo (Mar 16, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> Lesbians don't tend to shoot rainbows out of their buttholes. Their stereotypical voices also don't attract as much attention/ annoy people as much and since lesbians have been every guys fantasy for years now I guess it's not as "taboo"?


 
to be fair, the lesbians I know are the ultimate bitches.


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## FallenGlory (Mar 16, 2011)

i'm kind of on the fence here about how/if I should come out to my parents. my friends already know im bi and are OK with it, kind of skeptical at first, but i'm not sure how my parents would react. i know that _if_ i choose to come out, it'll be soon (like, maybe within this month hopefully). got any advice for me, faf? i'd really appreaciate it. thanks :3


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## Discord Nova (Mar 26, 2011)

Im Bi and im totally scared of coming out in fear of my over-religious parents denying me. Then again im only 14 so i might want to wait...


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## Darkwing (Mar 27, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> Im Bi and im totally scared of coming out in fear of my over-religious parents denying me. Then again im only 14 so i might want to wait...


 
Do you know for sure that your parents are homophobic? Or are you just assuming because they're religious? 

My parents and most of my family are a tad religious, but as far as I know, a lot of them accept/don't care about gays and stuff. You'd be surprised.


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## Discord Nova (Mar 27, 2011)

Im sort of religious myself, but ever since i heard my mom said "God Hates Fags" i almost cried. It hurts more when i have to go to religious school chock-FULL of homophobes.


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## Darkwing (Mar 27, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> Im sort of religious myself, but ever since i heard my mom said "God Hates Fags" i almost cried. It hurts more when i have to go to religious school chock-FULL of homophobes.


 
Ooh. Then you may want to refrain from coming out D: 

I know how it feels, having to keep this whole thing a secret, it's pretty hard. I've never had a girlfriend so that leads to a lot of people questioning my sexuality already. (And I don't want to force myself to have a girlfriend, that's just wrong.) 

As for homophobes, ignore them. As long as they don't know that you're bi they won't harm you. If you argue with them they'll think you're gay. It's a really ignorant mindset, it's pretty aggravating but there's always ignorant people in the world that you have to deal with. 

Also, another note, make sure to read the OP (Original Post) of this thread. It's very helpful.


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## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Mar 27, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Ooh. Then you may want to refrain from coming out D:
> 
> I know how it feels, having to keep this whole thing a secret, it's pretty hard. I've never had a girlfriend so that leads to a lot of people questioning my sexuality already. (And I don't want to force myself to have a girlfriend, that's just wrong.)
> 
> ...


 
Do what you feel you should do. You don't have to prove yourself to anyone for any reason. No one deserves appeasement. That goes for gay haters and gays themselves. It will be tough. I'm not sure if you're still on the conservative side, but if you are, then you have a long, hard road ahead of you. The Right will hate you for what you are and the Left will hate you for what you believe, and if you can endure that hardship, then you will come out on top as an individual.


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## Discord Nova (Mar 27, 2011)

I may be religious but my mom is just OVERLY religious. Oh well haters gonna hate. Itd probably be worse for me to come out because i like guys ALOT more and my mom would probably take it as being TOTALLY gay... I hate being 14.


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## Darkwing (Mar 27, 2011)

Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs said:


> Do what you feel you should do. You don't have to prove yourself to anyone for any reason. No one deserves appeasement. That goes for gay haters and gays themselves. It will be tough. I'm not sure if you're still on the conservative side, but if you are, then you have a long, hard road ahead of you. The Right will hate you for what you are and the Left will hate you for what you believe, and if you can endure that hardship, then you will come out on top as an individual.


 
Wow, thanks crackers. I'll keep that in mind  

As for my political beliefs, they are very inbetween, leaning more to the right though. I'm neutral enough to make right-wingers call me a complete sinner and left-wingers to call me a war mongering pig. Though I find U.S politics to be pretty stupid anyways since most arguments are so emotionally charged and heavily bias :I


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## Discord Nova (Mar 28, 2011)

Itll actually be worse to come out since im actually gay/bi-curious more than anything... so my mom would lose her f'n mind


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## Grey Wolverine (Mar 28, 2011)

I don't know if I am gay or not, sometimes I think I am and other times, its just kinda there. Its still there usually, but I don't know if its hormones or if I may be gay/bi or something.


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## Duality Jack (Mar 28, 2011)

I am sorry to say I have to come out... I used to be catholic. *GASP*

I am so ashamed I used to have faith but... its okay now I became Agnostic.


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## Discord Nova (Mar 28, 2011)

Ok then Ace... YOU SHALL BURN IN HELL!!!!! Just kidding, but um... what the fuck?!


----------



## Duality Jack (Mar 28, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> Ok then Ace... YOU SHALL BURN IN HELL!!!!! Just kidding, but um... what the fuck?!


 The joke is that I am a non-gay member.


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## Grey Wolverine (Mar 28, 2011)

Dont be ashamed, just be yourself. More people need to just be themselves, yes I believe in individualism.


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## Milo (Mar 28, 2011)

The Drunken Ace said:


> The joke is that I am a non-gay member.


 we got it, after the THOUSANDTH GOD DAMN TIME D:<


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## Discord Nova (Mar 28, 2011)

Im technically gay, but if i came out id be on the fucking street... damn bigots...


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## Darkwing (Mar 28, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> I don't know if I am gay or not, sometimes I think I am and other times, its just kinda there. Its still there usually, but I don't know if its hormones or if I may be gay/bi or something.


 
Sorry to break it to you, but really, most of the time it's not x.x 

I've been in the same place as you as well. In the end I turned out to be gay. I'm not saying that it can't be hormones, but most of the time I don't think it's "just hormones". 

I'd say, give yourself a week to think about weather you're straight/bi/gay whatever, in the end, if you still have feelings for guys, you're probably gay/bi.


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## Kryn (Mar 29, 2011)

Well really, those hormones would create feelings for other people regardless of your orientation. Hormones don't make you gay/bi/straight they just make your horny. If you happen to be feeling attracted to people of the same sex period, you're probably gay.


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## Duality Jack (Mar 29, 2011)

Milo said:


> we got it, after the THOUSANDTH GOD DAMN TIME D:<


 I had to crack it again for old times sake.


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## Lemoncholic (Mar 29, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Sorry to break it to you, but really, most of the time it's not x.x
> 
> I've been in the same place as you as well. In the end I turned out to be gay. I'm not saying that it can't be hormones, but most of the time I don't think it's "just hormones".
> 
> I'd say, give yourself a week to think about *weather* you're straight/bi/gay whatever, in the end, if you still have feelings for guys, you're probably gay/bi.


 
I oughta spank yo' ass fo' that.


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## Discord Nova (Mar 29, 2011)

Itd be a pain in the ass to come out as gay to my parents, theyd treat me like dirt


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## CynicalCirno (Mar 29, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> Im technically gay, but if i came out id be on the fucking street... damn bigots...


 
What's "Technically gay"?



> I am attracted to women but I WATCH PENIS ALL DAY LONG AND I LOVE THE JIZZ. I LOVE WOMEN WITH PENIS TOO.


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## Discord Nova (Mar 29, 2011)

Im totally gay, its just my way of talking sucks sometimes


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## Darkwing (Mar 29, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> I oughta spank yo' ass fo' that.



;3 



QuinnWOLF said:


> Itd be a pain in the ass to come out as gay to my parents, theyd treat me like dirt


 
Then don't. It's really not hard keeping it a secret at first, before people start noticing that you lack interest in girls, I've had people question me before because of that D: 

But who knows, maybe your parents will love you, no matter what you are.


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## Spatel (Mar 29, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> I'd say, give yourself a week to think about weather you're straight/bi/gay whatever, in the end, if you still have feelings for guys, you're probably gay/bi.


 If you're bi, I think it'll take more than a week.

That's the thing about being bi. You never really know. Your attraction to your non-preferred sex sometimes isn't straightforward.


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## Grey Wolverine (Mar 29, 2011)

Alright, ill give it time


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## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Mar 30, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Wow, thanks crackers. I'll keep that in mind
> 
> As for my political beliefs, they are very inbetween, leaning more to the right though. I'm neutral enough to make right-wingers call me a complete sinner and left-wingers to call me a war mongering pig. Though I find U.S politics to be pretty stupid anyways since most arguments are so emotionally charged and heavily bias :I


 
When you're around intolerant people, politics is quite tiring. I have been on left and right boards, and I can tell you this, it's all the same. Both are violent and both want to punish others who don't think the way they do. Can't even be a little bit moderate around some people or else you get "SHUT UP! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT! MORON." It's weird how boards operate like that. 

I understand now what Skift was talking about.


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## Ophee (Mar 30, 2011)

(o_o) I thought this is for people who just came out of the furry burrow.  L^O^L.  But I say the issue is much deeper here than what I read in Human Sexuality 101 (^_0).


----------



## Randy-Darkshade (Mar 30, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Alright, ill give it time



Give what a week? Being gay?


----------



## Skittle (Mar 30, 2011)

Ophee said:


> (o_o) I thought this is for people who just came out of the furry burrow.  L^O^L.  But I say the issue is much deeper here than what I read in Human Sexuality 101 (^_0).


 You don't need to come out as a furry.
There is no reason so come out as a furry.

Also, furrow burrow?

fdsflhnsd;crsgrdxc


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## Mentova (Mar 30, 2011)

Ophee said:


> *(o_o) I thought this is for people who just came out of the furry burrow.*  L^O^L.  But I say the issue is much deeper here than what I read in Human Sexuality 101 (^_0).



what


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## Grey Wolverine (Mar 30, 2011)

Randy-Darkshade said:


> Give what a week? Being gay?


 
Thinking.


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## Randy-Darkshade (Mar 31, 2011)

Ophee said:


> (o_o)* I thought this is for people who just came out of the furry burrow.*  L^O^L.  But I say the issue is much deeper here than what I read in Human Sexuality 101 (^_0).



When people start associating every "coming out" thread as coming out as furry you know damn well they are into furry way to much.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

I am going to get so much shit for this because of all the gay jokes and how I deny it, but recently I've honestly been thinking I might be bi.


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## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I am going to get so much shit for this because of all the gay jokes and how I deny it, but recently I've honestly been thinking I might be bi.


 
april fools day is over dammit, STOP PLAYING PRANKS ON ME :C


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> april fools day is over dammit, STOP PLAYING PRANKS ON ME :C


 That post was 100% serious brah.


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> That post was 100% serious brah.


 
Really, sir?

Well then, your reputation will change. Now you'll be called the "Evil bi fox" and people will start to love you...

Is it really true?


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> That post was 100% serious brah.


 
I'm going to give this new information a few days to process...


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I am going to get so much shit for this because of all the gay jokes and how I deny it, but recently I've honestly been thinking I might be bi.


 
Oh snap!~ XD


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 3, 2011)

So it took you 11,000 posts on FAF before you started turning gay
Is that some kind of record of something?


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Really, sir?
> 
> Well then, your reputation will change. Now you'll be called the "Evil bi fox" and people will start to love you...
> 
> Is it really true?


 Yes. It's weird but I'm being serious. If I actually am bi I certainly have a preference for girls though.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 3, 2011)

Teto said:


> So it took you 11,000 posts on FAF before you started turning gay
> Is that some kind of record of something?


 
Soon he'll start turning slutty and be begging to suck some cock. :V


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Teto said:


> So it took you 11,000 posts on FAF before you started turning gay
> Is that some kind of record of something?


 
it most likely is....

no it definitely is


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Yes. It's weird but I'm being serious. If I actually am bi I certainly have a preference for girls though.


 
well we certainly don't expect you to suddenly wanna make out with 3 different guys at once... :U

I won't treat you any differently... unless you actually do start making out with 3 guys at once, then yes, I'll treat you differently à² _à²


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Yes. It's weird but I'm being serious. If I actually am bi I certainly have a preference for girls though.



Ah, fair enough then. And when did you start to find boys as attractive? Why? (Though this one has no answer).


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 3, 2011)

AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Ah, fair enough then. And when did you start to find boys as attractive?


 
He always did. :V


----------



## SnowFox (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I am going to get so much shit for this because of all the gay jokes and how I deny it, but recently I've honestly been thinking I might be bi.


 
Screen-capping this.

I always feel bad about teasing straight people about being gay when they finally end up turning gay.

Sorry H&K :[


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> well we certainly don't expect you to suddenly wanna make out with 3 different guys at once... :U
> 
> I won't treat you any differently... unless you actually do start making out with 3 guys at once, then yes, I'll treat you differently à² _à²


 I don't see that happening. Don't worry. :|


AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Ah, fair enough then. And when did you start to find boys as attractive? Why? (Though this one has no answer).


 I have no idea. I think I might always have but repressed it. I've just been thinking about it a lot the last week or so and I've been talking to a few friends about it. I'm still trying to figure this shit out though. I'm not even sure if I really am or not. For some strange reason I felt compelled to post in this thread.


SnowFox said:


> Screen-capping this.
> 
> I always feel bad about teasing straight people about being gay when they finally end up turning gay.
> 
> Sorry H&K :[


 I'm blaming you for this.


----------



## SnowFox (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I'm blaming you for this.


 
I can't remember who I did it to last, I think before that it was Jashwa.

Anyway, I'm really sorry. How about an apology kiss? (with as much tongue as you like <3 )


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 3, 2011)

SnowFox said:


> I can't remember who I did it to last, I think before that it was Jashwa.
> 
> Anyway, I'm really sorry. How about an apology kiss? (with as much tongue as you like <3 )



Jashwa is actually gay? Boy, he did not seem like it, to me at least.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

SnowFox said:


> I can't remember who I did it to last, I think before that it was Jashwa.
> 
> Anyway, I'm really sorry. How about an apology kiss? (with as much tongue as you like <3 )


 Let's skip the formalities and get right to the dick sucking bby ~<3


AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Jashwa is actually gay? Boy, he did not seem like it, to me at least.


 He's bi.


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> For some strange reason I felt compelled to post in this thread.


 
I'm not saying this is your answer, but it's a pretty good chance you might be bi. I've known people who have come out of that stage and remained straight, because the thought didn't bother them too much. it was more or less a spontaneous feeling for them

but people who seriously ponder the concept more likely end up bi. it's pretty much the same as realizing you're gay. the concept remains in your head for a long time, and it usually bothers people, up until the point where you decide to take another step and find out more about who you are.

anyway good luck with that. don't let it bother you too much. I know this sounds corny, but just accept who you are regardless. aha


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Let's skip the formalities and get right to the dick sucking bby ~<3
> 
> He's bi.



But don't do it here, people are watching and it's cold.

Thanks.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> I'm not saying this is your answer, but it's a pretty good chance you might be bi. I've known people who have come out of that stage and remained straight, because the thought didn't bother them too much. it was more or less a spontaneous feeling for them
> 
> but people who seriously ponder the concept more likely end up bi. it's pretty much the same as realizing you're gay. the concept remains in your head for a long time, and it usually bothers people, up until the point where you decide to take another step and find out more about who you are.
> 
> anyway good luck with that. don't let it bother you too much. I know this sounds corny, but just accept who you are regardless. aha


Thanks. I'll keep this in mind. I don't really _want_ to be bi and I (currently, at least) don't have any intention of dating men. It's just I'm thinking the attraction is there and I've felt curious about it, especially recently.


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Thanks. I'll keep this in mind. I don't really _want_ to be bi and I (currently, at least) don't have any intention of dating men. It's just I'm thinking the attraction is there and I've felt curious about it, especially recently.


 
Why the sudden doubts about your sexuality, then? 

Just wait and see if something that confirms it happens.

EDIT: Let me guess, you've tried and it is not easy.


----------



## SnowFox (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Let's skip the formalities and get right to the dick sucking bby ~<3
> 
> He's bi.


 
Oh mai :3
Out of the closet and straight (lol) into my pants all within 5 minutes.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Why the sudden doubts about your sexuality, then?
> 
> Just wait and see if something that confirms it happens.


 I mentioned having some occasional bi-curious fantasies to a friend and we started talking about it and the possibility of me being bi.



SnowFox said:


> Oh mai :3
> Out of the closet and straight (lol) into my pants all within 5 minutes.


 What did you expect? Look at my murrsona species hurr


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I mentioned having some occasional bi-curious fantasies to a friend and we started talking about it and the possibility of me being bi.


 
Like you just had them or found yourself enjoying them a little bit?

Because I tried to have some once and absolutely nothing happened.


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Because I tried to have some once and absolutely nothing happened.


 
yea that's you... not him

I think his point isn't that he TRIED to have them, but that they came naturally


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Like you just had them or found yourself enjoying them a little bit?
> 
> Because I tried to have some once and absolutely nothing happened.


 I found myself enjoying them.


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I found myself enjoying them.


 
so did you ever tell the friend you were having fantasies of about this? D:>


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 3, 2011)

All this bisexuality is making me sick


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> so did you ever tell the friend you were having fantasies of about this? D:>


 About gay sex? Yeah that's what started this.

This isn't an IRL friend btw.



Teto said:


> All this bisexuality is making me sick


 Why


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Why


 
Jesus fought for our souls
and you're throwing yours away


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Teto said:


> All this bisexuality is making me sick


 
we could talk about gay stuff.... :U

like you and me bby


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Teto said:


> Jesus fought for our souls
> and you're throwing yours away


 Fuck heaven. I'll go to hell and rock the fuck out with Dio.


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 3, 2011)

Teto said:


> Jesus fought for our souls
> and you're throwing yours away


 
An actual republican? What is an actual republican doing in this forum? [/not serious]


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Teto said:


> Jesus fought for our souls
> and you're throwing yours away


 jesus took away our souls :C

metaphorically speaking...


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Fuck heaven. I'll go to hell and rock the fuck out with Dio.


 
Who said anything about heaven?
If you lose your soul, you become a really really ugly old queen

Watch out man.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Teto said:


> Who said anything about heaven?
> If you lose your soul, you become a really really ugly old queen
> 
> Watch out man.


 What


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> What


 nobody ever knows....


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> nobody ever knows....


 Ok then.

Does this mean I am the fox stereotype now?


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Ok then.
> 
> Does this mean I am the fox stereotype now?


 do you yiff RP about sucking 3 cocks at once?...


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> do you yiff RP about sucking 3 cocks at once?...


 No sir I do not.


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> No sir I do not.


 then you sir, are a respectable furry :3c


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I have no idea. I think I might always have but repressed it. I've just been thinking about it a lot the last week or so and I've been talking to a few friends about it. I'm still trying to figure this shit out though. I'm not even sure if I really am or not. For some strange reason I felt compelled to post in this thread.


 
You remind me of me. :3


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> What


 
What are you whating about
It's kind of clear

Do you want to lose your soul?
Do you want to be an old queen?
_A DRAG QUEEN_, H&K
THAT'S WHAT IT'S GONNA BE HUH
cause this is where this train is headed


----------



## SnowFox (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> No sir I do not.


 
But you did just stick your penis in furry AIDS. That's more than just a _bit_ foxy.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> then you sir, are a respectable furry :3c


 Oh. =[

I was hoping I would start getting fliers in the mail about furry sex orgies that need a bottom bitch fox cumslut or places I can suck off people in bathrooms for pocket change.


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Oh. =[
> 
> I was hoping I would start getting fliers in the mail about furry sex orgies that need a bottom bitch fox cumslut or places I can suck off people in bathrooms for pocket change.


 
......


â‰–_â‰–


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> ......
> 
> 
> â‰–_â‰–


 Oh come on you know it's sexy bby. :3


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Oh come on you know it's sexy bby. :3


 
.....yes


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> .....yes


 Exactly.

Now meet me in the bathroom at 7/11 around 11pm for a good time bby <3


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Exactly.
> 
> Now meet me in the bathroom at 7/11 around 11pm for a good time bby <3


 
<-- Shat brix.


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Exactly.
> 
> Now meet me in the bathroom at 7/11 around 11pm for a good time bby <3


 I'm not sure if you are just fucking with us or wanting to fuck us


----------



## Milo (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Exactly.
> 
> Now meet me in the bathroom at 7/11 around 11pm for a good time bby <3


 D:>

....ok


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> I'm not sure if you are just fucking with us or wanting to fuck us


 ...can it be both?


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> ...can it be both?


 I think that's like dividing by zero or something.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> I think that's like dividing by zero or something.


 Or maybe I just want a good dicking sir did you think of that?!


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Or maybe I just want a good dicking sir did you think of that?!


 If you are bi, then I support HK x Gibby fanpairing >:3


----------



## Takun (Apr 3, 2011)

Leave the poor guy alone. ;~;


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Takun said:


> Leave the poor guy alone. ;~;


 But I want to see this happen irl
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5438199/


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> If you are bi, then I support HK x Gibby fanpairing >:3


 Oh god no.

I don't want creepy fangirls/boys shipping me with people. Especially other FAF posters. D:


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Oh god no.
> 
> I don't want creepy fangirls/boys shipping me with people. Especially other FAF posters. D:


 HK x Gibby
HK x Scotty
HK x Xaerun
HK x Fenrari
HK x Bloodshot_Eyes
HK x EdieFantabulous
HK x GatodeCafe
HK x FuzzyAlien
HK x Rukh
HK x Pliio


----------



## Skittle (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> But I want to see this happen irl
> http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5438199/


 But But... I already born. :c HOW WOULD THAT WORK!?

I am NOT climbing inside HK's ass >:C


----------



## Riavis (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> HK x Gibby
> HK x Scotty
> HK x Xaerun
> HK x Fenrari
> ...


 


Did not need those pictures in my head, man.


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Riavis said:


> Did not need those pictures in my head, man.


 Wait, I got another one
HK x Dick Cheney
"They don't call me _Dick_ Cheney for nothing."


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> HK x Gibby
> HK x Scotty
> HK x Xaerun
> HK x Fenrari
> ...


 :|

Why man, why?


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> :|
> 
> Why man, why?


 
Hey there~ ;V


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> :|
> 
> Why man, why?


 There are no words for how much I am laughing right now.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Bloodshot_Eyes said:


> Hey there~ ;V


 Oh hey bby u want a piece of this?


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Oh hey bby u want a piece of this?


 *begins recording*


----------



## Rouz (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I don't see that happening. Don't worry. :|



It's the only fun part though, getting drunk and making out with 3 dudes then passing out and seeing an orgy in front of you, but you are too drunk to join. :V


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Rouz said:


> It's the only fun part though, getting drunk and making out with 3 dudes then passing out and seeing an orgy in front of you, but you are too drunk to join. :V


 What if I'd rather be in the orgy sir?


----------



## Jashwa (Apr 3, 2011)

Congrats on finally admitting it, HK. I've been waiting for you to come to terms with it for a while now. 

To everyone shitting on this thread: please stop.


----------



## Rouz (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> What if I'd rather be in the orgy sir?



You wouldn't want to be in that orgy.

Nope, nope

But if you really wanted too, don't drink too much.

Does it feel more comfortable btw?


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Jashwa said:


> Congrats on finally admitting it, HK. I've been waiting for you to come to terms with it for a while now.


 Thanks. I'm still not completely sure yet. I guess there's only one way to find out...


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Thanks. I'm still not completely sure yet. I guess there's only one way to find out...


 Inb4 HK drops his pants.


----------



## Xipoid (Apr 3, 2011)

Good god. I have it set to 100 posts a page, and there's not a single relevant post to this thread on this *entire fucking page*.


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Xipoid said:


> Good god. I have it set to 100 posts a page, and there's not a single relevant post to this thread on this *entire fucking page*.


 HK came out of the closet, what do you expect?


----------



## Rouz (Apr 3, 2011)

Bi now gay later


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

Rouz said:


> Bi now gay later


 No I defiantly like women. :|


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> No I defiantly like women. :|


What is your opinion on traps?


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> What is your opinion on traps?


 They are confusing.


----------



## CannonFodder (Apr 3, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> They are confusing.


 Do you think Edie is hot?


----------



## Mentova (Apr 3, 2011)

CannonFodder said:


> Do you think Edie is hot?


 I don't know what they look like.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 4, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> No I defiantly like women. :|


 
Don't worry, you'll learn to hate them soon enough.

EDIT:

I'm a little worried. I always liked the idea of having children in the future, but I'm also starting to get very convinced that I am in fact, gay. I do realise there is the option of adopting, but I just can't think of it as feeling _right._


----------



## Spatel (Apr 4, 2011)

Maybe you and your bf could make an arrangement with a pair of lesbians to have kids.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 4, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Maybe you and your bf could make an arrangement with a pair of lesbians to have kids.


 
Forgive me for being a little slow with this but how does that work exactly? o.e


----------



## Tabasco (Apr 4, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Forgive me for being a little slow with this but how does that work exactly? o.e


 
"Swap you two some sperm for use of your uteruses. One kid per pair!"

Maybe?


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 4, 2011)

Blues said:


> "Swap you two some sperm for use of your uteruses. One kid per pair!"
> 
> Maybe?



Ah, simple enough. :3


----------



## Tabasco (Apr 4, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Ah, simple enough. :3


 
Might not be what he meant, though. I just hear about some lesbians solving the problem by getting a sperm donation, or gays finding surrogate incubators.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 4, 2011)

so you befriend a pair of lesbians that want to have kids, and you agree to provide sperm for 4 kids

you - girl A
you - girl B
bf - girl A
bf - girl B

if you do it this way, all 4 kids will be half-siblings with each other, and everyone will be the mother/father of 2 of the kids.

each of the couples gets 2 of the kids. You get to reproduce while staying in a monogamous gay relationship. The only downside is you'll have another kid out there you might never get to know. Maybe you could be like an uncle to them or something.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 4, 2011)

Spatel said:


> so you befriend a pair of lesbians that want to have kids, and you agree to provide sperm for 4 kids
> 
> you - girl A
> you - girl B
> ...



Well, that is my mind at ease! Thank you! :3


----------



## shmoo (Apr 4, 2011)

But then you might have kids that are yours (living with girl A and B)  but you won't necessarily be able to bond with them like you want to D:

Personally, I don't feel the need to have kids (but I'm only 16 years old, so..).   I suppose you could do the whole Girl A Girl B scenario but I think  that would cause more problems than it would resolve.  Maybe there is  another solution, but I don't really know you well enough to know what  to suggest :[

As for "coming out", well, I reckon I'm either gay or bi (vaginas repulse me, penises arouse me).  I mean, I suppose I could have a relationship with a female if I wanted to but it would be more of an emotional thing than a sexual thing.  Oh yeah, maybe I should have mentioned that I've never been in any sort of close relationship before so there's still that uncertainty, too.

I don't really feel the need to "come out" to anyone, but I suppose if I want any sort of relationship with any male, people would start asking questions.  I mean, I would just love to have some other boy to even just be close to that's not an idiot, doesn't sneeze rainbows or is unattractive.  I suppose my ideal person I'm looking for would be someone like me, but then again, I've never met anyone that I've felt _really _attracted to.  So far I've not had the desire to ask anyone out or anything like that.

So.. Coming out?  Maybe to other guys in the future, maybe to close friends..  Maybe I'll wait until I'm at University until I start pursuing relationships, who knows..  As for my parents, they won't reject me, that would be stupid.  They aren't religious and they would probably unconditionally support me.  But still, my sexual preference has nothing to do with them, so I'm not going to make a big deal of it..  

I think I kind of came out to a (not even close) friend of mine through texts yesterday.  I kind of want to know if he's gay or bi or uninterested in women or whatever, I just have a strange inkling.  I haven't explicitly said that I'm gay or anything to him, but I've strongly hinted at it.  He was kind of awkward about my texts but there may be progress over time.. I'll keep you all here on this thread up-to-date with any breaking news regarding the situation xD

Also (a little bit random), I can't stand super-dooper effeminate, rainbow radiating guys.  I'm sorry, but there's just something about feminine guys that just gives me shivers (in a bad way >.<).

So now marks the start of my life long conquest for love <3 (wow, I really must be gay if I'm saying things like that)

Sorry for the wall of text :[


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 4, 2011)

[Post deleted]


----------



## Takun (Apr 4, 2011)

I'm gay Gibby and I'm sure I'd like kids some day.  I know it sucks thinking you can't have "your own" or that maybe they'll get picked on.  It doesn't matter, you can still do it.  I'm thinking about either adopting realllly young or surrogate.  Not sure.  There isn't one right way to have a family.


----------



## Jude (Apr 4, 2011)

So, H&K came out. Cool.

Anyway, I've been dropping hints about me not being straight to my parents, just to see what their reaction would be, to help me prepare for coming out. I've prepared for different scenarios.

"Hey... I have a bisexual friend, but can't tell his parents because of their beliefs." "That's kind of sad."
"You know I've been noticing a ton of gay people around my school." "Yeah, I've been seeing a lot of them lately."
"I just found out that some girl I was talking to is transgendered." "In high school? That's gotta be tough. One of the guys I clean for used to be a woman."

Overall, my mom is accepting! Now I just need to actually come out...


----------



## Rouz (Apr 4, 2011)

Takun said:


> I'm gay Gibby and I'm sure I'd like kids some day.  I know it sucks thinking you can't have "your own" or that maybe they'll get picked on.  It doesn't matter, you can still do it.  I'm thinking about either adopting realllly young or surrogate.  Not sure.  There isn't one right way to have a family.


 
Surrogate. I just like the idea of my kids being mine. Not that I would bother caring for and loving someone's child, but it's something that bothers me.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 5, 2011)

Takun said:


> I know it sucks thinking you can't have "your own" or that maybe they'll get picked on.


 
Yeah, I have thought about that. I think the best excuse is for telling the child to say "I live with my dad and uncle" and if there's a second child, they could do the reverse. Like, for example *:V* : "Gibby is my father and HK is my uncle" and then the other kid could say "HK is my father and Gibby is my uncle and we both live together as two families under the same roof."

No, I do not intend bone HK, it's just a joke, the :V is there for a reason.


----------



## Larry (Apr 5, 2011)

Gibby said:


> "Gibby is my father and HK is my uncle" and then the other kid could say "HK is my father and Gibby is my uncle and we both live together as two families under the same roof."
> 
> No, I do not intend bone HK, it's just a joke, the :V is there for a reason.


 
xD


----------



## Discord Nova (Apr 5, 2011)

I...I...Im a christian...


Ok but seriously, im trying to come out to my mom as gay, but if I did id be in a damn church getting holy water poured on me until i die... DAMNIT


----------



## Mentova (Apr 5, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Yeah, I have thought about that. I think the best excuse is for telling the child to say "I live with my dad and uncle" and if there's a second child, they could do the reverse. Like, for example *:V* : "Gibby is my father and HK is my uncle" and then the other kid could say "HK is my father and Gibby is my uncle and we both live together as two families under the same roof."
> 
> No, I do not intend bone HK, it's just a joke, the :V is there for a reason.


 Gibby you really do want to rape me don't you? D:

Also at this point I'm like, 90% sure I'm bi. I don't think I'll be completely sure unless I like, experiment with someone or something.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 5, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Gibby you really do want to rape me don't you? D:
> 
> Also at this point I'm like, 90% sure I'm bi. I don't think I'll be completely sure unless I like, experiment with someone or something.


 
Is that an invitation? HURR HURR HURR >:V


----------



## Mentova (Apr 5, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Is that an invitation? HURR HURR HURR >:V


 Not from you. >=[


----------



## dinosaurdammit (Apr 5, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Not from you. >=[


 
Herm is the best way to go.

IT'S THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS!


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 5, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Not from you. >=[


 
No HK, I really do not want to rape you or exploit you or anything. I could never do that!
The other way around, however...


----------



## Cam (Apr 5, 2011)

I cant wait till HK just goes gay, and then within 5 minutes has an absolute clusterfuck of flirtatious messages


----------



## Jashwa (Apr 5, 2011)

Cam said:


> I cant wait till HK just goes gay


 I doubt this will happen. 

Also, HK and Gibby, just hook up already. You two would be cute together :C


----------



## GenrisFox (Apr 5, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> I...I...Im a christian...
> 
> 
> Ok but seriously, im trying to come out to my mom as gay, but if I did id be in a damn church getting holy water poured on me until i die... DAMNIT


 
Sucks that people are close minded like that.  I was lucky.  When I came out my parents were really supportive; they even wanted to get dinner with the people that helped me express my gay


----------



## Mentova (Apr 5, 2011)

Cam said:


> I cant wait till HK just goes gay, and then within 5 minutes has an absolute clusterfuck of flirtatious messages


 Oh god no. I could never say no to titties. I love them too much.


Jashwa said:


> Also, HK and Gibby, just hook up already. You two would be cute together :C


 Ah hell naw.

For many reasons. D:


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Apr 5, 2011)

I am bisexual. I don't want to come out yet, but if I do, what should I do?


----------



## Larry (Apr 5, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> I...I...Im a christian...
> 
> 
> Ok but seriously, im trying to come out to my mom as gay, but if I did id be in a damn church getting holy water poured on me until i die... DAMNIT



I understand how you feel. I'm also a Christian, but my parents disapprove of gays. Everytime something "gay" comes up to their faces, they either changed the subject or ignore it.

Right now, I'm still bi-curious. I might be just bisexual, but I really don't know since I haven't "done it" with a guy, or a girl for that matter.


----------



## GenrisFox (Apr 6, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> I am bisexual. I don't want to come out yet, but if I do, what should I do?


 
Talk to someone close to you--a close friend, cousin, maybe even an accepting parent (or the more accepting parent).  It's the best way to start.  If you're too uncomfortable talking to your parents about it, or you don't know how your parents would react, you can always try a counselor.  A friend of mine talked to a college counselor about it.  Another friend of mine is trying to get a sex change and he talked to a Therapist about it.

Essentially, just find someone to talk to and the rest will come naturally.

I talked to a lesbian and her gay brother when I first came out.  They helped me change to become more gay lol


----------



## Kihari (Apr 6, 2011)

Well, I'm glad to report that over spring break this last weekend, I came out to someone IRL for the first time in my life.

I made a point of visiting a friend from elementary / high school while I was in the area; we hung out at his apartment for a while, went to the show, and then went to McDonald's and ate in the car. Earlier he had mentioned this girl he recently met and had dated a few times, so I brought her up to kind of lead into the conversation.

Eventually he said, "Yeah dude, now we gotta find you someone" (which is what I was waiting for, since everyone says this to me when the topic of relationships rolls around).

And I go, "Hey, I've got something to tell you, and I want to see if you're surprised or not... I'm gay!"

I know they say that coming out for the first time gives you this feeling like you've never felt before, but _goddamn_, I couldn't even think for a few seconds after that, I was so overwhelmed. I really couldn't believe I'd said it, like somehow I was imagining the whole thing, but at the same time I felt like I'd just been let out of prison or something.

The best part is that he was really supportive and assured me he didn't think any differently of me for it. Then I got to talking about my parents and not knowing what's going to happen when I tell them and about started bawling, and he hugged me and said they'd come around eventually, and that made me feel a lot better. He's a really good friend for doing all that, and even though I knew all along he'd be cool with it I still can't believe I've finally told someone.

So, yeah... actual progress! Feels good, man.


----------



## Larry (Apr 6, 2011)

Kihari said:


> Well, I'm glad to report that over spring break this last weekend, I came out to someone IRL for the first time in my life.
> 
> I made a point of visiting a friend from elementary / high school while I was in the area; we hung out at his apartment for a while, went to the show, and then went to McDonald's and ate in the car. Earlier he had mentioned this girl he recently met and had dated a few times, so I brought her up to kind of lead into the conversation.
> 
> ...



I'm glad you summoned up the courage to come out to him. The fact that he didn't think different of you means that he's a true friend. 

...Damn it man, you made me tear up. xD


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 6, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Ah hell naw.
> 
> For many reasons. D:


 
That makes me curious, what do most gays/bis/HKs prefer in men? As far as I can tell, there's whole many different levels of gay, like manly men who like other manly men and then those ones that remind you of the Bruno movie in a bad way. ._.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 6, 2011)

Gibby said:


> That makes me curious, what do* most gays/bis/HKs *prefer in men? As far as I can tell, there's whole many different levels of gay, like manly men who like other manly men and then those ones that remind you of the Bruno movie in a bad way. ._.


 I'm my own sexuality now? Sweet!

But uhh, super duper manly men creep me out.


----------



## Takun (Apr 6, 2011)

Hk's ideal man would dick him, make dinner, and then go to the shooting range.


----------



## Jashwa (Apr 6, 2011)

Takun said:


> Hk's ideal man would dick him, make dinner, and then go to the shooting range.


 It's funny because it's true.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 6, 2011)

I hate you both.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 6, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> I'm my own sexuality now? Sweet!
> 
> But uhh, super duper manly men creep me out.


 
Well me, I wouldn't say they creep me out but I wouldn't get "involved" so to speak. It's the super-fabulous ones that make me wanna run away. A middle point is good for me. You know, they behave and look like lads but they don't act like fucking wierdos. D:


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 6, 2011)

Are the mean gays making fun of you H&K


----------



## Mentova (Apr 6, 2011)

Hateful Bitch said:


> Are the mean gays making fun of you H&K


 Yes.

=[


----------



## Kryn (Apr 6, 2011)

Gibby said:


> That makes me curious, what do most gays/bis/HKs prefer in men? As far as I can tell, there's whole many different levels of gay, like manly men who like other manly men and then those ones that remind you of the Bruno movie in a bad way. ._.


 
I'm masculine myself and I'm more interested in the manly type with just a hint of femininity or just a little sensitivity . I'm gay, I'm attracted to GUYS, not guys who think they are girls with dicks.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 6, 2011)

Takun said:


> Hk's ideal man would dick him, make dinner, and then go to the shooting range.


 
sounds alright. nerds are better though

get dicked -> go back to playing video games


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 6, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Yes.
> 
> =[


 
>: do you want me to make them go away?

I can make them go *poof*. They're already poofs so it'll be easy!


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 6, 2011)

Spatel said:


> sounds alright. nerds are better though
> 
> get dicked -> go back to playing video games


 
Ideal relationship there. "Hey, what you got planned today, 'hon'?" - "nothing" - "Wanna have sex and play videogames all day?" - "Ok."


----------



## Mentova (Apr 6, 2011)

Hateful Bitch said:


> >: do you want me to make them go away?
> 
> I can make them go *poof*. They're already poofs so it'll be easy!


 Yes make them go away. They are seducing me with promises of sexytime. D:


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 6, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Yes make them go away. They are seducing me with promises of sexytime. D:


 
WE WERE HAVING SEXYTIME AND I WAS NOT INFORMED????


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Apr 6, 2011)

GenrisFox said:


> Talk to someone close to you--a close friend, cousin, maybe even an accepting parent (or the more accepting parent).  It's the best way to start.  If you're too uncomfortable talking to your parents about it, or you don't know how your parents would react, you can always try a counselor.  A friend of mine talked to a college counselor about it.  Another friend of mine is trying to get a sex change and he talked to a Therapist about it.
> 
> Essentially, just find someone to talk to and the rest will come naturally.
> 
> I talked to a lesbian and her gay brother when I first came out.  They helped me change to become more gay lol



Alright, thanks I may just stay in the closet for a while, my brother is a homophobe and cant keep his damn mouth shut. Any time I tell him ANYTHING he has to tell 80 people in like half an hour. And I like my privacy.



Takun said:


> Hk's ideal man would dick him, make dinner, and then go to the shooting range.


 
Sounds like the good life.


----------



## Kihari (Apr 6, 2011)

larry669 said:


> I'm glad you summoned up the courage to come out to him. The fact that he didn't think different of you means that he's a true friend.
> 
> ...Damn it man, you made me tear up. xD


 
Truly, it was an emotional moment.


----------



## Discord Nova (Apr 6, 2011)

Im gay im starting to think im bi, i have attractions to girls sometimes even though I have attractions to mainly guys. Does this make me bi?


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Apr 6, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> Im gay im starting to think im bi, i have attractions to girls sometimes even though I have attractions to mainly guys. Does this make me bi?


 
Yes, but you lean more to men.


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 6, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> Im gay im starting to think im bi, i have attractions to girls sometimes even though I have attractions to mainly guys. Does this make me bi?


 
Yeah, leaning to guys. 

Also, you've been talking about coming out to your parents on here. If I were you I'd get my sexuality figured out first before doing that.


----------



## Hir (Apr 6, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Yes, but you lean more to men.


 
yes it does


----------



## Ley (Apr 6, 2011)

Is it possible to still not know even though you've 'been' with both? Not actual sex, but just fooling around.

It feels pretty much the same with both sexes.


----------



## Hateful Bitch (Apr 7, 2011)

Then I guess you're bi maybe?
Maybe
I mean


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 7, 2011)

Ley said:


> Is it possible to still not know even though you've 'been' with both? Not actual sex, but just fooling around.
> 
> It feels pretty much the same with both sexes.


 
Well it sounds like you have no real preference. Just see which sex you finally decide to settle down with over the long term be it male or female (or something inbetween) before you start labelling yourself.


----------



## RLR (Apr 9, 2011)

Can someone tell me if it's really appropriate for my parents on a few occasions ask me if I'm gay? I'm not currently (and not in a long time) interested in anyone at all, but I've been struck with the question a few times and I find it a little inappropriate.

So basically, is it ok for my parents to randomly ask that or should I be able to keep that to myself?


----------



## Kihari (Apr 9, 2011)

RLR said:


> Can someone tell me if it's really appropriate for my parents on a few occasions ask me if I'm gay? I'm not currently (and not in a long time) interested in anyone at all, but I've been struck with the question a few times and I find it a little inappropriate.
> 
> So basically, is it ok for my parents to randomly ask that or should I be able to keep that to myself?


 
I think your parents are going to ask whatever they want, but how you answer is most certainly up to you.

Myself, I'd rather parents didn't ask that question, since as their child _you_ should be the one to go to _them_ and talk about it when you're damn good and ready, not when they feel like forcing it out of you before you're prepared for it.

...but that's me.


----------



## RLR (Apr 9, 2011)

Kihari said:


> I think your parents are going to ask whatever they want, but how you answer is most certainly up to you.
> 
> Myself, I'd rather parents didn't ask that question, since as their child _you_ should be the one to go to _them_ and talk about it when you're damn good and ready, not when they feel like forcing it out of you before you're prepared for it.
> 
> ...but that's me.


 
Forgot to mention that the only time they've asked me is when they were drunk (at seperate times). That might be why it bothers me so much.


----------



## Kihari (Apr 9, 2011)

RLR said:


> Forgot to mention that the only time they've asked me is when they were drunk (at seperate times). That might be why it bothers me so much.


 
Ah, well yes, that's a bit different.

You feel like they have these suspicions, but they only show it when they're drunk enough to let their guard down?


----------



## RLR (Apr 9, 2011)

Kihari said:


> Ah, well yes, that's a bit different.
> 
> You feel like they have these suspicions, but they only show it when they're drunk enough to let their guard down?


 
It's fine if they're suspicious, then it's just their problem. My mom doesnt drink often, however my dad does. They both know I hate being around drunk people and that I hate random personal questions. They don't listen.


----------



## Kihari (Apr 9, 2011)

RLR said:


> It's fine if they're suspicious, then it's just their problem. My mom doesnt drink often, however my dad does. They both know I hate being around drunk people and that I hate random personal questions. They don't listen.


 
If that be the case, then yes, I find it incredibly rude and inconsiderate of them to behave that way.

As I said, how you respond to the question is entirely up to you and your best interests.


----------



## shmoo (Apr 9, 2011)

lol, I told one of my friends that I was a fag the other day and his response was, "no you're not".  Why do people feel the need to deny these things  ?  We ended up having a weird argument for about 2 hours and in the end I still don't think he believes me...  He thinks it's some elaborate "wind-up".  Silly people


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 9, 2011)

shmoo said:


> lol, I told one of my friends that I was a fag the other day and his response was, "no you're not".  Why do people feel the need to deny these things  ?  We ended up having a weird argument for about 2 hours and in the end I still don't think he believes me...  He thinks it's some elaborate "wind-up".  Silly people


 
Haha, same thing here when I came out to my friend. 

His argument? "Well I don't see you acting girly and wearing skirts, so you're not Gay" >:C


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 9, 2011)

I was talking to a family friend and he asked about my interest in women. I was willing to tell him but to start with I just said that I lack it nowadays and he responds with OH MY FUCK YOU'RE GAY!? I tell him no. ._. Dammit, Gibby, dammit!


----------



## Larry (Apr 9, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I was talking to a family friend and he asked about my interest in women. I was willing to tell him but to start with I just said that I lack it nowadays and he responds with OH MY FUCK YOU'RE GAY!? I tell him no. ._. Dammit, Gibby, dammit!



That's why I'm afraid to come out to somebody. I'm afraid that they're gonna overreact so much, I'm unable to talk to them anymore.


----------



## Kihari (Apr 9, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Haha, same thing here when I came out to my friend.
> 
> His argument? "Well I don't see you acting girly and wearing skirts, so you're not Gay" >:C


 
I guess if your knowledge of homosexuality was limited to that FAAABULOUS~ stereotype, it would be pretty hard to believe that someone who's so "straight-acting" could possibly be gay.


----------



## Ley (Apr 9, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I was talking to a family friend and he asked about my interest in women. I was willing to tell him but to start with I just said that I lack it nowadays and he responds with OH MY FUCK YOU'RE GAY!? I tell him no. ._. Dammit, Gibby, dammit!


 
:[


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Apr 9, 2011)

You know what, I'm going to just stay in the closet for a while. Can anyone recommend what a good time to come out is?


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 10, 2011)

larry669 said:


> That's why I'm afraid to come out to somebody. I'm afraid that they're gonna overreact so much, I'm unable to talk to them anymore.



Definately this. That's my nightmare scenario Gibby xD 



Kihari said:


> I guess if your knowledge of homosexuality was limited to that FAAABULOUS~ stereotype, it would be pretty hard to believe that someone who's so "straight-acting" could possibly be gay.


 
Yeah, it's pretty annoying x.x


----------



## shmoo (Apr 10, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Haha, same thing here when I came out to my friend.
> 
> His argument? "Well I don't see you acting girly and wearing skirts, so you're not Gay" >:C


 
Actually, I don't think that was his argument (though it possibly could be).  I told him on windows live messenger and it ended up turning into a, "No you're not", "Yes I am," kind of thing.  Then he proceeded to tell me how heterosexuals were greater than homosexuals and that if everyone in the world was gay then the world would die.

It was pretty entertaining, but to be honest it was almost as if he was trying to convince himself more than he was trying to convince me.

I'm in no way "girly" either.  Far from it .  Then again, I've never had a boyfriend or girlfriend before, never want kids etc.  So maybe if you were smart (or stupid) then you could guess that I was gay (of course I would deny it...).  Neither has my friend though...

Aww well, he's probably just a fag in denial :V
*
tl;dr* My friend childishly tried to convince both himself and I that homosexuality is wrong.  Hilarity ensues.

None of it was a big deal, though.  Just casual conversation...  like, "Oh hey thurr i'm a fagg", "Nuu ur not", "yea a amm" ....

and the saga continues


----------



## Spatel (Apr 12, 2011)

If everyone were gay, the human race would move on just fine. The replacement rate might be lower at first, but it would stabilize eventually once people figured out their priorities.

I don't get that kind of stupidity. Apparently your sperm magically stop working when you're gay? Ridiculous.


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Apr 12, 2011)

Yah really humans are smart, we'd adapt to survive like we always have. The Saint has spoken!


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 12, 2011)

Gibby progress:

Today in the car with my dad, he was talking about a recent argument with my mother and I turned this into my own rant about women and why I'd rather trust blokes long-term instead of women to hint my point accross to him. He agreed with me on all points but was like "Fuck me, you're not gay, are you?" whilst looking at me as if I was something he stepped in. So I said I never said that, so no "no" nor a "yes." The ride home was a little awkward after. Fuck.


----------



## Larry (Apr 12, 2011)

At least you tried...


----------



## Jashwa (Apr 12, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Gibby progress:
> 
> Today in the car with my dad, he was talking about a recent argument with my mother and I turned this into my own rant about women and why I'd rather trust blokes long-term instead of women to hint my point accross to him. He agreed with me on all points but was like "Fuck me, you're not gay, are you?" whilst looking at me as if I was something he stepped in. So I said I never said that, so no "no" nor a "yes." The ride home was a little awkward after. Fuck.


 You need a hug :C


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 12, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Gibby progress:
> 
> Today in the car with my dad, he was talking about a recent argument with my mother and I turned this into my own rant about women and why I'd rather trust blokes long-term instead of women to hint my point accross to him. He agreed with me on all points but was like "Fuck me, you're not gay, are you?" whilst looking at me as if I was something he stepped in. So I said I never said that, so no "no" nor a "yes." The ride home was a little awkward after. Fuck.


 
Ooh xc Well at least you're a little bit of the way there. Personally, I'm keeping quiet, I don't want my parents to know that I'm gay, they'd probably embarrass me forever x.x

And another thing, I hate how, if you're FOR gay rights and that you don't treat gays like the plague, that it automatically means that you are gay. My friends were having a discussion about it, somehow they figured out that I was pro-gay rights and now they think I'm gay because of that. (I mean, okay, I AM gay after all, but come the fuck on... >:C)


----------



## Mentova (Apr 12, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Gibby progress:
> 
> Today in the car with my dad, he was talking about a recent argument with my mother and I turned this into my own rant about women and why I'd rather trust blokes long-term instead of women to hint my point accross to him. He agreed with me on all points but was like "Fuck me, you're not gay, are you?" whilst looking at me as if I was something he stepped in. So I said I never said that, so no "no" nor a "yes." The ride home was a little awkward after. Fuck.


 That sounds awful =[

Obviously that doesn't sound like he is, but do you know for sure if he is intolerant of gays?


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 12, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> That sounds awful =[
> 
> Obviously that doesn't sound like he is, but do you know for sure if he is intolerant of gays?


 
D'aw, well I don't really know... I don't think he's totally against them and respects the "to each his own" thing, but he has looked on the gay stuff and gay lads with disgust multiple times before. I think he's just gonna get very, very angry and disappointed that one of these people is also his only son. I have a funny feeling that he knows, but he does understand my opinion and women and just says that I'm just not ready for a relationship at my age. It's like he's denying it.

I think I won't bother beating this horse for a while. Just keep it hidden and anything I do, hidden. He can find out for himself, or when I'm an adult and in a relaitonship, he can just accept that I'm a grown man who is happy and independent.

Thanks for the concern anyway, guys. C:


----------



## Mentova (Apr 12, 2011)

Gibby said:


> D'aw, well I don't really know... I don't think he's totally against them and respects the "to each his own" thing, but he has looked on the gay stuff and gay lads with disgust multiple times before. I think he's just gonna get very, very angry and disappointed that one of these people is also his only son. I have a funny feeling that he knows, but he does understand my opinion and women and just says that I'm just not ready for a relationship at my age. It's like he's denying it.
> 
> I think I won't bother beating this horse for a while. Just keep it hidden and anything I do, hidden. He can find out for himself, or when I'm an adult and in a relaitonship, he can just accept that I'm a grown man who is happy and independent.
> 
> Thanks for the concern anyway, guys. C:


 That does not sound fun.

This is also why I have no intention of telling my parents I'm bi. I know my dad doesn't out right hate gays, but I don't know how he would react since I'm his only soon.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 12, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> That does not sound fun.
> 
> This is also why I have no intention of telling my parents I'm bi. I know my dad doesn't out right hate gays, but I don't know how he would react since I'm his only soon.


 
I guess he'll just accept it and have hopes you settle down with a woman. Who knows, you might!


----------



## Larry (Apr 12, 2011)

Why does coming out have to be so fucking hard!?! 

*rips part of hair out*


----------



## Rouz (Apr 12, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> That does not sound fun.
> 
> This is also why I have no intention of telling my parents I'm bi. I know my dad doesn't out right hate gays, but I don't know how he would react since I'm his only soon.



My dad has 3 sons and he isn't the happiest person about. I said this before on another thread but he compared the day me telling him with the day his first son, my brother died. So I can't imagine being the only and your dad taking it well. But, your father may be more open than mine.


----------



## Kihari (Apr 12, 2011)

To anyone who _has _come out to their parents or has thought-out plans to do so soon, how _do _you go about this? I know it's subjective and all since everyone's parents are different, but in general is there a good way to go about doing it?

Like, would you have your boyfriend / girlfriend / whatever there with you for support? Would you just sit down with your folks out of the blue and say, "Hey, guess what? ..." Any personal experiences someone could share?


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 12, 2011)

Kihari said:


> To anyone who _has _come out to their parents or has thought-out plans to do so soon, how _do _you go about this? I know it's subjective and all since everyone's parents are different, but in general is there a good way to go about doing it?
> 
> Like, would you have your boyfriend / girlfriend / whatever there with you for support? Would you just sit down with your folks out of the blue and say, "Hey, guess what? ..." Any personal experiences someone could share?


 
Back when I still had Myspace... mom found my Myspace... :/


----------



## EdieFantabulous (Apr 12, 2011)

You should all realize it is harder to accept when they have finally solidified an image.
When you break that frame they made it makes it a LOT harder for them to accept.
It's easier young, unless they throw you out, then it is hard, but most parents would never do that.


----------



## Mentova (Apr 12, 2011)

Actually, since I'm just bi and not fully gay, do I even really need to come out? Unless I get in a gay relationship obviously.


----------



## Jashwa (Apr 12, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Actually, since I'm just bi and not fully gay, do I even really need to come out? Unless I get in a gay relationship obviously.


 No one "needs" to come out. If you don't feel comfortable coming out, then don't. Although, it's highly recommended if you're in a relationship to not HIDE the person from your parents and you'd have to deal with it then. It's just that for a lot of people, they don't want to go on living with their parents/family assuming the wrong things about them and want them to know the truth. 

That's how it was with me when I came out to my parents, at least.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Apr 13, 2011)

Jashwa said:


> That's how it was with me when I came out to my parents, at least.


 
If you don't mind me asking, what was it like when you did come out?


----------



## Zyden (Apr 13, 2011)

So, silly question, but if a lot of your are from the US, are there known cities/towns were the general population attracts gays? I live in Brighton, UK, and it's the gay capital of the country. At University, my problem is finding a straight person.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 13, 2011)

San Francisco is an obvious one. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gayborhood#Top_LGBT_populations_in_U.S._cities_and_states

But as you can see, all the major cities have gay-friendly neighborhoods. SF, Boston, Atlanta, and Seattle have high LGB populations for their size, and they're all conveniently located in a different region of the country. They kinda serve as the "gay capital" for those regions. New York is a huge city though so its queer population is definitely higher than any of these.


----------



## ArgonTheFox (Apr 14, 2011)

my god I can imagein my whole family finding out I was gay/bi -_-

my mum and dad wouldnt care but my brother would probably flip his lid and my sister would just make fun of me for the rest of my life. and my gran would probably just shove a fucking bible down my throat then get the local priest or whatever its called to rape me up the ass with a silver cross andI bet most of my cousins wouldnt care but theres this one little shit in my family whos such a homophobic little sod.

but I dont think most of my friends would care but I bet I would get made fun of at school for the rest of my life.


----------



## ArgonTheFox (Apr 15, 2011)

hmm. I think I know how im going to come out to my friends. im gonna wait for this boy I like to come into the base room at lunch break at school and then im going to whisper in his ear im bi and I love him then im gonna kiss him on the cheak...then if im feeling embarassed ill just hide under a table and if not ill just sit there while evreybody stares at me in disbelief.

ill leave comeing out to my parents for anouther day...in the VERY VERY far future


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 15, 2011)

ArgonTheFox said:


> hmm. I think I know how im going to come out to my friends. im gonna wait for this boy I like to come into the base room at lunch break at school and then *im going to whisper in his ear im bi and I love him then im gonna kiss him on the cheak...*then if im feeling embarassed ill just hide under a table and if not ill just sit there while evreybody stares at me in disbelief.


 
Coming from a guy who has flirted with other guys before, that is a VERY BAD idea. 

You will come off creepy as hell to the guy you're flirting with, doesn't matter weather he's gay or not, he'll still feel creeped out, and will NOT be interested in you. 

Take things slower, use humor, make him laugh, smile, laugh at his jokes and give a lot of eye contact. Let things slowly and comfortably build up from there.


----------



## Ariosto (Apr 15, 2011)

Talk about college diversity...

Turns out one of my best acquaitances (I don't use the word "friend" too loosely) turned out to be gay. Then he told me that another good acquaitance of mine was gay too and they used to date.
A few days after after that, one of my girl-acquaitances was speaking to a guy who was evidently gay and they started to talk about hot men and he pointed all the gay ones that passed by and asked her about what she thought of their looks.
Then, my girl-acquaitance told me that one of our faculty classmates was gay too.

I had never met a gay person in real life and suddenly get a to see/know a ton of them. Curious.


----------



## ArgonTheFox (Apr 16, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Coming from a guy who has flirted with other guys before, that is a VERY BAD idea.
> 
> You will come off creepy as hell to the guy you're flirting with, doesn't matter weather he's gay or not, he'll still feel creeped out, and will NOT be interested in you.
> 
> Take things slower, use humor, make him laugh, smile, laugh at his jokes and give a lot of eye contact. Let things slowly and comfortably build up from there.


 
thanks ^^

I dont know why I was thinking about going that fast. other guys have tried to go that fast with me and it did creep me out so I suppose your right.

but I think this guy might be gay dispite the fact he claims he isnt. he refuses to get a girlfriend and he keeps talking about his penis to me and other boys so I think he might just be in the closet trying to hint but we will find out if hes gay or not >:3

EDIT: erm...you know what ill decide going after this guy after im safely out of the closet...I think ill just come out to my best friend first. ill just wait till he goes on MSN then ill just tell him im gay...I dont think he will have a negative reation beacuse I think one of his other friends are gay.


----------



## JoshGoesRawr (Apr 16, 2011)

Woot.
I've been out for like.... a year now I think. Told a close friend who has a gay brother, I decided that would be a good place to start. From there I told more people in my friendship group. I told them that if someone asked they could say it. So most of my year level knows now.
It was pretty amazing so I thought that I could tell my family. Sister, fine. Mother and father, wasn't so good. My mother took my to some restaurant in which she decided to go on about how she wants grand kids and that she now thinks that I'm going to be really "busy". Uhmm.. yeah. She told my father and they both like grounded me and wouldn't let me out because I was apparently immature and untrustworthy, even though I had been acting the same way before I told them and they thought that I was trustworthy and mature then.
All in all, telling my friends was great but I really regret telling my parents.


----------



## Lobar (Apr 16, 2011)

Gibby said:


> D'aw, well I don't really know... I don't think he's totally against them and respects the "to each his own" thing, but he has looked on the gay stuff and gay lads with disgust multiple times before. I think he's just gonna get very, very angry and disappointed that one of these people is also his only son. I have a funny feeling that he knows, but he does understand my opinion and women and just says that I'm just not ready for a relationship at my age. It's like he's denying it.
> 
> I think I won't bother beating this horse for a while. Just keep it hidden and anything I do, hidden. He can find out for himself, or when I'm an adult and in a relaitonship, he can just accept that I'm a grown man who is happy and independent.
> 
> Thanks for the concern anyway, guys. C:


 
I think this really is the smart move.  From where I hang out online, I end up reading a lot of coming-out horror stories (of two different stripes even, gay and atheist, and they're often disturbingly similar), and this is a pretty common theme among them.  Seemingly tolerant parents of the "I don't care what they do/believe, it's got nothing to do with me" mindset do a complete 180 when it's their own flesh and blood.  The home becomes a hostile environment, college funds vanish, and futures are lost.  As much as it sucks to keep it inside, I really can't recommend that anyone come out until they are completely independent or 100% sure of their parents' acceptance.

On the other hand, once it can't completely fuck you over anymore _please do come out_, because awareness is the first step in changing the world's treatment of gays for the better.  See:



AristÃ³crates Carranza said:


> Talk about college diversity...
> 
> Turns out one of my best acquaitances (I don't use the word "friend" too loosely) turned out to be gay. Then he told me that another good acquaitance of mine was gay too and they used to date.
> A few days after after that, one of my girl-acquaitances was speaking to a guy who was evidently gay and they started to talk about hot men and he pointed all the gay ones that passed by and asked her about what she thought of their looks.
> ...


 
The strongest tactic of those seeking to deny rights is to get gays (or whatever group in question, it's an extremely common approach) to be seen as a group of "others".  Others are not you, not anyone you know, just outsiders looking to change your world and make it their other world.  It's easy to hate others because you never see others.  By coming out, you shatter the illusion.  Gays stop being others, they become people that are a part of the community, they are people you already know that are being hurt.  So yes, do come out, once it's no longer a personal risk to you.


----------



## ArgonTheFox (Apr 16, 2011)

I just told my best friend but somehow he knew I was gay for a year and a half without me even dropping hints o.o

but he took it really well. he actuly has anouther gay friend like I thought. but im gonna wait for a bit before telling my parents...it feels like such a massive relief just to tell 1 person even though im not totaly "out of the closet"


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 16, 2011)

ArgonTheFox said:


> but I think this guy might be gay dispite the fact he claims he isnt. he refuses to get a girlfriend and he keeps talking about his penis to me and other boys so I think he might just be in the closet trying to hint but we will find out if hes gay or not >:3


 
I'd say it's worth a shot. If he's talking about his penis so much he must want something. 



ArgonTheFox said:


> I just told my best friend but somehow he knew I was gay for a year and a half without me even dropping hints o.o
> 
> but he took it really well. he actuly has anouther gay friend like I thought. but im gonna wait for a bit before telling my parents...it feels like such a massive relief just to tell 1 person even though im not totaly "out of the closet"


 
Wow, good to hear that things went well ^^ 

I told my best friend that I was gay, he was denying it to me, saying that I just can't be gay. The rest of that day was very awkward because he never talked to me. I'm pretty sure he knows by now, though, he caught me checking out a guy once. Me and him are still good friends though regardless of that.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 16, 2011)

apparently you can hide the "interested in" status on your facebook profile from certain people. i've got it set to college friends and exceptions I make now. wish I knew about that a long time ago.

I never use facebook, but I kept getting complaints over the years from gay friends that my page was lying... hey pal some people have shitty relatives alright? I think this should keep everyone happy.


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## ArgonTheFox (Apr 16, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Wow, good to hear that things went well ^^


 
^^ Thank you. without this website or this thread I would still be a depressed and upset guy eternaly stuck in the closet. but now im perfectly happy in my own skin and im perfectly fine with being gay where as I used to be ashamed of being gay and I hated myself.

thank you so much.


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## Darkwing (Apr 17, 2011)

ArgonTheFox said:


> ^^ Thank you. without this website or this thread I would still be a depressed and upset guy eternaly stuck in the closet. but now im perfectly happy in my own skin and im perfectly fine with being gay where as I used to be ashamed of being gay and I hated myself.
> 
> thank you so much.


 
No problem, I like helping people in this thread, I went through some troubling times myself regarding my sexuality, no one has to go that alone. 

If you have any more issues feel free to PM me or post on the thread.


----------



## shmoo (Apr 19, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> I told my best friend that I was gay, he was denying it to me, saying that I just can't be gay. The rest of that day was very awkward because he never talked to me. I'm pretty sure he knows by now, though, he caught me checking out a guy once. Me and him are still good friends though regardless of that.



My friend is denying that I'm gay right now, too...  still.  Apparently I was just "not gay" or "not a fag" and I'm still trying to suss out what the whole non-believing issue is.  I think he still believes that I'm just joking around...  I'll get through to him over time...

As for the rest of the day awkwardness, there was none for me.  If I ever talk to my friend about it it's always late at night (or very early morning) 11:30 PM onwards when I'm so tired that I talk about things I wouldn't normally talk about (on Windows Live Messenger).  It would be really awkward for me to seriously talk about it with him when he's like, right there and when I don't have time to plan a response.

lol, I've never been caught checking out a guy (I don't think so, anyway.  Actually I don't even think that I "check out" other guys... I'm the worst gay guy ever!)...  I just kind of lurk around being creepy in my own special way :]

I'm still friends with my friend, it's like nothing has even changed at all (which is how I hoped it would go, it was kind of just like casual MSN conversation because I was bored).  It was like, "Oh, by the way, I'm a fag." then "No your not" then fall asleep, then wake up, go to school and everything is magically fine.

I'm such a lucky person (in general).


----------



## Fling (Apr 19, 2011)

-


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## Hir (Apr 19, 2011)

ArgonTheFox said:


> then im going to whisper in his ear im bi and I love him then im gonna kiss him on the cheak...


 
don't forget to tell him your fursona too! :]


----------



## Teto (Apr 20, 2011)

And then stand on a table and yodel your heart out.


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## Spatel (Apr 20, 2011)

Pinecones said:


> Okay, so I am having a real hard time with this particular issue. Im already halfway through college and I still am playing the role of a straight male. I have physical relationships with with women that I have no interest in because I really don't want to make my housemates and friends uncomfortable around me because I really value their friendship... They are really close friends who can make sexual jokes with, and even though I actually am gay, they are just that, jokes. And I know that if I come out of the closet it will be a lot different and I honestly can't stand the idea of that. How did you guys get through this issue?


What are the political leanings of your friends/family? If your friends are a progressive bunch it shouldn't be a problem.  Family's another story; there's no telling how they'll react. My mother, for instance, a straight-ticket voting democrat and a lifelong liberal, is still a tremendous homophobe.


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## Fling (Apr 20, 2011)

-


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## Grey Wolverine (Apr 21, 2011)

Spatel said:


> San Francisco is an obvious one.
> 
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gayborhood#Top_LGBT_populations_in_U.S._cities_and_states
> 
> But as you can see, all the major cities have gay-friendly neighborhoods. SF, Boston, Atlanta, and Seattle have high LGB populations for their size, and they're all conveniently located in a different region of the country. They kinda serve as the "gay capital" for those regions. New York is a huge city though so its queer population is definitely higher than any of these.


 
Actually, Massachusetts DOSE have a "Gay" town. Providence town or Ptown has the largest concentration of gays in Massachusetts, or atleast thats what Iv heard. Its a really nice place.

Also, I was caught checking out a guy today, when he confronted me I just ran like hell, dose anyone have any advice for a better way to handle something like that?


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 21, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Also, I was caught checking out a guy today, when he confronted me I just ran like hell, dose anyone have any advice for a better way to handle something like that?


 
Oh my god x3 

I don't know, depends on how he confronts you. But regardless of how, I'd run away out of embarrassment, especially considering that ALL the cute guys turn out to be straight, making the whole situation awkward -.-


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## Grey Wolverine (Apr 21, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Oh my god x3
> 
> I don't know, depends on how he confronts you. But regardless of how, I'd run away out of embarrassment, especially considering that ALL the cute guys turn out to be straight, making the whole situation awkward -.-


 
So, I made the right choice your saying?


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## Darkwing (Apr 21, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> So, I made the right choice your saying?


 
Meeeeh... Depends, if you really want to, go ahead and tell him, though don't be overly flirtatious or anything because that creeps out/pisses people off.


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## Oovie (Apr 21, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Also, I was caught checking out a guy today, when he confronted me I just ran like hell, dose anyone have any advice for a better way to handle something like that?


 ... Oh fuck, I never even _thought_ about beingcaught looking at a guy (now that'll be in the back of my mind). I'd opt for some kind of comment rather than coming straight out with it and saying I was looking him over, trying to dance around what I really want to say. :shrug:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJwln5EuFsw&feature=channel_video_title that might be relevant, some people might take what you say as a compliment too.
"Are _you_ gay?"
"... Are you asking me out?" I love this conversation, said it a couple times pretty funny. :>


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## Schwimmwagen (Apr 21, 2011)

As of late, my dad won't stop hinting at me getting a nice girlfriend in the future or asking my opinion on a passing girl. HUURRRR. It makes me annoyed and makes me feel like telling him straight out just to get him to stop.


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## Flatline (Apr 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> As of late, my dad won't stop hinting at me getting a nice girlfriend in the future or asking my opinion on a passing girl. HUURRRR. It makes me annoyed and makes me feel like telling him straight out just to get him to stop.


 
I can deal with things like that, but a lot of my friends do the same 90% of the time and that annoys the hell out of me. Mostly because they are drooling over the ugliest sluts.


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## Oovie (Apr 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> As of late, my dad won't stop hinting at me getting a nice girlfriend in the future or asking my opinion on a passing girl. HUURRRR. It makes me annoyed and makes me feel like telling him straight out just to get him to stop.


 Friends/coworkers always do this around me, but I always seem to get by with the mildest compliments thankfully. I remember one conversation being really close because the guy wouldn't shut up about what he'd do to this girl and I couldn't contribute *anything* to the conversation anymore. And I'm thinking "Ohhh-kay, can I fucking go now?"


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## Darkwing (Apr 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> As of late, my dad won't stop hinting at me getting a nice girlfriend in the future or asking my opinion on a passing girl. HUURRRR. It makes me annoyed and makes me feel like telling him straight out just to get him to stop.


 
Maybe he's suspecting that you're gay? Didn't you try coming out to him sometime before? 



Miles Snowpaw said:


> I can deal with things like that, but a lot of my friends do the same 90% of the time and that annoys the hell out of me. Mostly because they are drooling over the ugliest sluts.


 
Oh my god this xc 

I just say "Yeah" and "Uh-huh" until they talk about something else.


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## Schwimmwagen (Apr 21, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Maybe he's suspecting that you're gay? Didn't you try coming out to him sometime before?


 
No, but I did rant a lot about women and how I intend on not having a relationship with women and sorta implied that statisically, straight relationships have a lot of problems and cause bad shit when I find it odd that GAY relationships are so stable and cause few problems, if any.


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## Fling (Apr 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> No, but I did rant a lot about women and how I intend on not having a relationship with women and sorta implied that statisically, straight relationships have a lot of problems and cause bad shit when I find it odd that GAY relationships are so stable and cause few problems, if any.


 
Let me assure you, relationships have problems no matter what orientation you are. Basically, the only difference is that with m/m you can't accidently get your buddy pregnant


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## Flatline (Apr 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> No, but I did rant a lot about women and how I intend on not having a relationship with women and sorta implied that statisically, straight relationships have a lot of problems and cause bad shit when I find it odd that GAY relationships are so stable and cause few problems, if any.


 
Gay relationships, not gay furry relationships.


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## Schwimmwagen (Apr 21, 2011)

Pinecones said:


> Let me assure you, relationships have problems no matter what orientation you are. Basically, the only difference is that with m/m you can't accidently get your buddy pregnant


 
Do you even know women? They're on a completely different level of thinking and behaviour. It's people of opposite sexes that get angry at each other because of this. Trust me, talking to a pissed off woman is like disarming a bomb. Many, many men admit to not understanding women totally and women say the same thing about men. It's all this misunderstanding that tends to fuck things up at times when it comes to arguments. I would know because I have to argue a lot with women. Every fucking day. And as I said, statistically homosexual relationships are a lot more stable, likely because of the two members of the same sex understand each other a lot easier. And yes, gay relationships do have problems too, but as the statistics show, they're not as severe. See what I mean, yo?



Miles Snowpaw said:


> Gay relationships, not gay furry relationships.


 
Stereotypical furries, that is. I'm not sure if I like the idea of getting a relationship with a furfag myself. But idk, it's a bit early to say that.


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## Kihari (Apr 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> As of late, my dad won't stop hinting at me getting a nice girlfriend in the future or asking my opinion on a passing girl. HUURRRR. It makes me annoyed and makes me feel like telling him straight out just to get him to stop.



My mother does this almost every time I see her now. It's one of the reasons I don't come around much, and I find it extremely inappropriate, especially since she knows, she _knows_, how much it irritates me when she brings it up.



Miles Snowpaw said:


> I can deal with things like that, but a lot of my friends do the same 90% of the time and that annoys the hell out of me. Mostly because they are drooling over the ugliest sluts.


 
My response is always a fleeting, "Yeah, that's great," followed by a quick return to whatever we were talking about before.


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## Fling (Apr 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Do you even know women? They're on a completely different level of thinking and behaviour. It's people of opposite sexes that get angry at each other because of this. Trust me, talking to a pissed off woman is like disarming a bomb. Many, many men admit to not understanding women totally and women say the same thing about men. It's all this misunderstanding that tends to fuck things up at times when it comes to arguments. I would know because I have to argue a lot with women. Every fucking day. And as I said, statistically homosexual relationships are a lot more stable, likely because of the two members of the same sex understand each other a lot easier. And yes, gay relationships do have problems too, but as the statistics show, they're not as severe. See what I mean, yo?


 

Yes, I know women  I have been in relationships with a decent number of women thus far. I agree with you that homosexual couples may have a certain closeness due to being the same sex, but, as far as statistics go, The most recent information I know of is from http://mensnewsdaily.com/2007/05/06...e-stable-relationships-than-straight-couples/ .

One specific part : _"One problem with this story is that the best, most recent studies indicate that same-sex couples, especially lesbians, are more likely to break up. For instance, a study published in Demography found markedly higher breakup rates among same-sex couples: 50% higher for gay couples and 167% higher for lesbian couples. And a UCLA study released last month on American couples comes up with similar findings for gay and lesbian couples here in the United States."
_

Of course it will vary from couple to couple, but I would still say that homosexual relationships are not more stable than heterosexual ones. But I don't actively research the subject, so I couldn't say for sure.


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## Grey Wolverine (Apr 21, 2011)

Oovie said:


> "Are _you_ gay?"
> "... Are you asking me out?"


 
I now have another option YAY!
The way I saw it I had few options,
1 fight
2 punch him than run while he is down
3 stay and see what happens
4 run


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## Leon (Apr 22, 2011)

I'm bi, so I don't really have those kinds of problems, and my dad is the only one I came out too. As for a straight or gay relationship being more stable than one another, I think it totally depends on the people involved, and that both have the same number of problems.


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## BTA (Apr 25, 2011)

My parents were basically fine with me being gay. My brother took a couple days to adjust, but he's fine with it now. My grandparents are the "God loves all of his children" type of Christians, so they were okay with it too.

Coming out to all of my friends was the hard part though. Since they're all rednecks, I thought they were going to react negatively to it. I decided to tell them on a mudding trip around the bonfire that night (seemed like the perfect atmosphere). They were a little freaked out, but then they started to joke around about it, and I played along. They don't look at me as any different now (except for the fact that they bought me panties for my birthday as a joke, lol)

I guess I was just lucky...


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## theinkfox (Apr 26, 2011)

Gibby said:


> talking to a pissed off woman is like disarming a bomb.



that's only because you're not doing it right
once you understand  the emotive and irrational women way of thinking, it isn't a big deal

now on topic, i never knew that "coming out" could be that dificult
we always see the story from outside of the closet but never from inside
my friends thought that i was gay because i never get laid with a woman till the age of 21... stupid people prejudice


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## jurzie (Apr 26, 2011)

i live in what is basically churchland so coming out is a great way to meet new angry mobs carrying picks
but nah seriousloy, i think my family knows exclusively because i dont laugh whenever somebody makes a job about "faggehts"


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## shmoo (Apr 26, 2011)

jurzie said:


> i live in what is basically churchland so coming out is a great way to meet new angry mobs carrying picks
> but nah seriousloy, i think my family knows exclusively because i dont laugh whenever somebody makes a job about "faggehts"



You'll have your fake laugh down in no time.  Example below...

Sibling:  "...and there was this little faggot kid being all faggy and stuff"
Parent:  "Haw haw haw, that's hawrarious!"
You:     "Ha.  Ha.  Ha." *hides face and dies a little inside.*

But seriously though I don't know what I would do if I lived in a religious area.  I'm against all forms of religion myself, so if it interferes with my own morals and beliefs then I'd probably be severely pissed off.  I mean, religion is just another way that people allow themselves to be manipulated, it's ridiculous.

Religious Zealot:  "Oh hai there look at me!  I'm such a good person because I can't develop my own sense of morals and so cherrypick from a holy book which itself is a flawed interpretation of flawed stories.  Anyone who opposes my religion is wrong and bad and must be converted because it is an almighty, imaginary god whose will I must interpret.  Anyone who disobeys this book will be damned in the afterlife, oh yes, there's an afterlife, too!"

Son (or daughter) of religious idiot: "I'm gay"

Religious idiot response 1:  "That's okay because the rules of the holy book which I have obeyed and enforced my whole life will be bent just for you.  The higher power which I so thoroughly believe in will make an exception for you, because although the book is very clear that you will go to a horrible place after you die, somehow I think the higher power will forgive you."

Religious idiot response 2:  "I will reject you and disown you from the family, further allowing myself to be manipulated by my 'religion'.  Just because your preferences are affected by something that you have no power over I will pin all the blame of this situation on you.  It is your fault.  You are an abberation.  My religion is right, you are bad."

*tl;dr *Religion is baad, mmkay.

On a side note, I think there's this boy I like...  woo...


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## Grey Wolverine (Apr 26, 2011)

Today to see how people reacted I tried something.
Me: Kenzie, I love you.
Kenzie: Evan, shut up.
Was funny.


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## Darkwing (Apr 26, 2011)

shmoo said:


> But seriously though I don't know what I would do if I lived in a religious area.  I'm against all forms of religion myself, so if it interferes with my own morals and beliefs then I'd probably be severely pissed off.  I mean, religion is just another way that people allow themselves to be manipulated, it's ridiculous.


 
I don't find religion necessarily a bad thing. I say to each their own beliefs. 

Also, just because you're gay doesn't mean you get a one-way ticket to hell, in the bible it says that everyone sins, homosexuality is just one of the many sins listed. 

But if you're talking about homophobia, personally I think homophobia starts at schools, anti-gay bullying and slurs are a constant thing there. I know a few atheists who are very homophobic. 



shmoo said:


> On a side note, I think there's this boy I like...  woo...



Being in love isn't a bad thing. Heak, who knows, maybe he's the one, you just have to find out :3 



Grey Wolverine said:


> Today to see how people reacted I tried something.
> Me: Kenzie, I love you.
> Kenzie: Evan, shut up.
> Was funny.


 
Hehe x3 



shmoo said:


> Sibling:  "...and there was this little faggot kid being all faggy and stuff"
> Parent:  "Haw haw haw, that's hawrarious!"
> You:     "Ha.  Ha.  Ha." *hides face and dies a little inside.*



Meh, eventually you learn to laugh at yourself, personally I find gay jokes funny sometimes.


----------



## Discord Nova (Apr 26, 2011)

So apparently gays cant be christians according to my friend, if only he knew I was gay... Also I almost came out the other day, me and my mom were watching american idol and she asked me if I thought Jennifer Lopez was hot and i was like "Hell no," she suspects me now


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## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 26, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> So apparently gays cant be christians according to my friend, if only he knew I was gay... Also I almost came out the other day, me and my mom were watching american idol and she asked me if I thought Jennifer Lopez was hot and i was like "Hell no," she suspects me now


 
Tell your mom you think J Lo is an STD ridden whore and no one should find her hot. :V

Even if she's not, I wouldn't know because I don't follow pop culture. >_>


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## Grey Wolverine (Apr 26, 2011)

sorry for double post. Where is erase?


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## Grey Wolverine (Apr 26, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Hehe x3


 
Yah, also Kenzie's full name is Makenzie. It's quite amusing.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 26, 2011)

QuinnWOLF said:


> So apparently gays cant be christians according to my friend, if only he knew I was gay... Also I almost came out the other day, me and my mom were watching american idol and she asked me if I thought Jennifer Lopez was hot and i was like "Hell no," she suspects me now


 
You know you can judge attractiveness in your non-preferred gender just fine, right? It's not like you're suddenly required to be allergic to women. Some straight men act that way with other men, but that's purely because of societal conditioning to be homophobes.

Although I think she'd be hotter without all the damn makeup. Real women are the hot ones. Plastic women... not so much.


----------



## Darkwing (Apr 26, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Yah, also Kenzie's full name is Makenzie. It's quite amusing.


 
Oh god xD 

If you keep doing that eventually he'll start catching on X3


----------



## Leon (Apr 27, 2011)

I've been trying to be more open about who I am, but it just feels hard and awkward.


----------



## Enwon (Apr 27, 2011)

leon said:


> I've been trying to be more open about who I am, but it just feels hard and awkward.


Maybe that's not who you are, then.  As in you are bisexual, just you're not big on openly proclaiming your sexuality to the world.  Just be yourself.  If you're naturally not an open person, that's okay.


----------



## Leon (Apr 27, 2011)

True enough I reckon.


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## Kryn (Apr 27, 2011)

That's really good advice. I mean even straight people don't want to hear about each others sexual escapades all the time. Where I live it's just a good idea period to keep to it myself when around people that don't need to hear about it, but at the same time I'd like to tell certain people I also realize I would be treated differently afterwards. 

The only person I have left that I _want_ to tell is my mom. I think she would take it well but I'm waiting for the right moment. But I'm worried I won't be able to once it pops up


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## Spatel (Apr 27, 2011)

leon said:


> I've been trying to be more open about who I am, but it just feels hard and awkward.


 There was an adjustment period of 4-5 months for me. After that you'll get used to it and everything will be awesome.


----------



## shmoo (Apr 27, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> I don't find religion necessarily a bad thing. I say to each their own beliefs.



But you need to remember that beliefs shape opinions and opinions shape  actions, so religion and the like shouldn't be taken lightly.  I hate  the way it was assumed all the way through my childhood that everyone (especially children, I mean c'mon we didn't get to choose for ourselves?) in like, the whole country I'm in,  was christian or religious (I mean, religion is like a default setting that everyone  is assumed to be set with, wtf!?  Just like being straight etc.)



Darkwing said:


> Being in love isn't a bad thing. Heak, who knows, maybe he's the one, you just have to find out :3



As for being in love...  I'm not in love X.x  I don't think that I'm in  love, that's a strong word...  My thoughts and dreams just tend to  magnetise towards that one person, though, but I'm sure it's just a  phase >.>  And now that (in my mind) I've officially declared  myself as gay I now find myself unintentionally checking out other guys  every now and then.  It's kind of weird, because like a week or so ago I  wouldn't even have spared a second glance at anyone, never mind a  boy...  

The person I like I've actually been intentionally trying to get closer  to and (to my belief) succeeding.  Though, he's not exactly visually  stunning.  He has his good aspects but in my mind I'm really critical of  his other attributes [then again, I'm not exactly the epitome of human  attractiveness, either], but he is a relatively nice person and we share  many common interests so I'm pushing forward...  I suppose I just  really want to find out if he's interested in any gender besides women  (I just want to find out if he's gay or curious or anything!! aghh,  maybe I'll get impatient and just flat-out ask him)..



Darkwing said:


> Meh, eventually you learn to laugh at yourself, personally I find gay jokes funny sometimes.


 
Gay jokes...  They can be funny or cringeworthy...  the one person that I told I was gay to loves throwing around homophobic words and phrases, but to be honest I think he's just intentionally doing it to see if I really am queer or not.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Apr 27, 2011)

leon said:


> I've been trying to be more open about who I am, but it just feels hard and awkward.


 Bow chika bow wow. :V
post count +1 :V


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Apr 27, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Oh god xD
> 
> If you keep doing that eventually he'll start catching on X3


 
It's not Kenzie I like, but since he thinks I'm on acid and am a complete nut, he tends to dismiss me as thus. So, I thought test the waters and see what happens. I could always claim it was a joke. HAZA! for a well thought out plan! Still, he is really nice...


----------



## Discord Nova (Apr 28, 2011)

I found an article about homosexuality and the bible by a gay christian, and it points out things that most christians overlook.


http://www.soulforce.org/article/homosexuality-bible-gay-christian

As a gay christian, this is pretty agreeable.

Edit: If i should make a separate thread for this, please let me know.


----------



## shmoo (May 1, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> It's not Kenzie I like, but since he thinks I'm on acid and am a complete nut, he tends to dismiss me as thus. So, I thought test the waters and see what happens. I could always claim it was a joke. HAZA! for a well thought out plan! Still, he is really nice...


 
Just force-feed him a rainbow and everything will be okay...

Kenzie: "Hey what are you d..."
You: "Shh shh.  It's all going to oo~kaa~y."

Any potential problems solved! :V

-----

As for the bible and homosexual views by christians.. I suppose it kind of belongs in this thread. It's relevant I suppose and it's interesting to read (I scanned through it) even though it kind of makes me angry (religion in general makes me angry, to be honest).

------

So I'm kind of thinking about telling the person I like that I'm gay...  Not sure how to do it and I'm not sure it's even that important but, whatever, I'll probably just send an awkward text or xbox live message.  I mean I think I already hinted at it to him...  Lol, no big deal, anyway...


----------



## Darkwing (May 1, 2011)

shmoo said:


> So I'm kind of thinking about telling the person I like that I'm gay...  Not sure how to do it and I'm not sure it's even that important but, whatever, I'll probably just send an awkward text or xbox live message.  I mean I think I already hinted at it to him...  Lol, no big deal, anyway...


 
Sending a text or an Xbox live message about it sounds like a bad idea. Things like these are best discussed face-to-face.


----------



## shmoo (May 1, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Sending a text or an Xbox live message about it sounds like a bad idea. Things like these are best discussed face-to-face.


 
Lol.  It kind of does.  But still, face-to-face, confrontation, agh!

It'd be so much easier for me to tell anyone I'm gay without being there in person...  I mean, I find great difficulty in actually saying the word "gay" out loud so telling anyone face-to-face would be hard to do.

Meh.  Maybe I won't tell him at all.  Maybe I won't act on how I feel.  Maybe I'm not even gay (I probably am, though...).

It's just so much easier to remain inactive than to actually pursue anything...  I mean, I don't even know if I'm looking for someone to have a relationship with or if I just want to be with someone to fool around with.  I actually think I might be a little sexually frustrated or something...

Now I'm even doubting whether I like the person or not.. I mean, sure he's kind of similar to me in interests but he doesn't exactly look that attractive in appearance. (neither do I though.  And I know it makes me look shallow but I can't help it.  I can be weird and picky sometimes).  I don't even think he's gay...

Ugh.  Stupid indecision.  One moment I want to have sex with him (and many other male friends [sigh] and people), then next I'm contemplating a relationship (d'aww), and after that I question whether he is "good enough" (I know, what the fuck!?), and then I'm back at square one again...  and all of this is before I even take into account how he feels and whether he is gay or bi or anything in the first place...

And I have exams in less than 2 weeks to prepare for   Maybe I'm just stressed...  Anyway,  I needed to vent.  If anyone skips this post because it's too long then I forgive you 

Any input or wisdom or wit or "pull yourself together!"s to share?


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 1, 2011)

shmoo said:


> Any input or wisdom or wit or "pull yourself together!"s to share?


 
*Pleas read the following in a British accent*
PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER MAN! This seems like something best to be thought about while NOT under stress.

Also, I am having a problem. I like a couple of guys, but my mom once said that she hopes none of us are gay. So, if I get a nice guy, than what should I do. I don't know why she said it, but if she dosn't like or accept gays, what should I do?


----------



## Icky (May 1, 2011)

I feel like a goddamn alien, reading this thread as a straightfag.


----------



## DarrylWolf (May 2, 2011)

I have learned to embrace and adapt to my own sexuality, though it has not been so easy, especially around my own parents. I am chaste and will remain that way for the considerable future. For years they had always expected me to come home with a girlfriend but I had my own moment of truth when I looked at the cost of courtship, marriage, and child-rearing and decided that lifelong chastity was more cost-effective, and far less of a headache. My attempts at finding a girlfriend have been hampered by my reliance on non-sentimental, rational thinking which is incompatible with the feminine mind.


----------



## Leon (May 2, 2011)

Icky said:


> I feel like a goddamn alien, reading this thread as a burdfag.



Fix'd c:


----------



## shmoo (May 2, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> *Pleas read the following in a British accent*
> PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER MAN! This seems like something best to be thought about while NOT under stress.
> 
> Also,  I am having a problem. I like a couple of guys, but my mom once said  that she hopes none of us are gay. So, if I get a nice guy, than what  should I do. I don't know why she said it, but if she dosn't like or  accept gays, what should I do?



I think I lol'ed a little bit after reading that in a british accent  (english accent).  I'll probably just leave everything until after my  gauntlet of tests, that's sensible.

As for her not accepting you, I don't really know what you should do.  I  mean, you could get all indignant and passionate about it and shout at  her for not accepting that you are gay (which is completely natural and  common, being gay) or you could keep quiet about it...  it's not like  who you like is anything to do with your mother?  You can't live by her  morals and views your whole life, so I don't know, maybe oppose her or  something (but bear in mind that she could kick you out the house [If  she can, how old are you?]).

As for liking guys, nom nom nom.

Just do what you feel is right.  My advice is probably nonsense.



Icky said:


> I feel like a goddamn alien, reading this thread as a straightfag.



You *are *an alien   Lol, besides laughing at the stories, why  are you here, anyway? (I don't mean that in a nasty way) Are you going  to come out to us as being straight?  Wow, society has changed these  days.

Icky: "I've got something to tell you all."
Everyone: *Stares intently, mouths slightly agape*
Icky: "I'm straight.  There.  I said it."
Everyone: *Gasps*



DarrylWolf said:


> I have learned to  embrace and adapt to my own sexuality, though it has not been so easy,  especially around my own parents. I am chaste and will remain that way  for the considerable future. For years they had always expected me to  come home with a girlfriend but I had my own moment of truth when I  looked at the cost of courtship, marriage, and child-rearing and decided  that lifelong chastity was more cost-effective, and far less of a  headache. My attempts at finding a girlfriend have been hampered by my  reliance on non-sentimental, rational thinking which is incompatible  with the feminine mind.



Ehm.  You don't sound gay or bi you just sound warped :V

Basing what you want to be entirely based on cost and possible stress  seems shallow.  I mean, do you even like guys or gals or do you just not  want to spend any money?  You make it sound as if you are choosing your  sexuality which, to be honest, isn't exactly possible...  Almost sounds  like you came on this thread to boast or something.

(sorry for the hate)


----------



## Spatel (May 2, 2011)

Darryl appears to be asexual. Asexuals  are part of the queer community. They still have to 'come out'. Telling  your parents you're asexual means telling them they're not getting  grandkids, so functionally it bears similar consequences to telling them you're gay/trans.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (May 2, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Darryl appears to be asexual. Asexuals  are part of the queer community. They still have to 'come out'. Telling  your parents you're asexual means telling them they're not getting  grandkids, so functionally it bears similar consequences to telling them you're gay/trans.


 
It's only a problem when you're a single child.


----------



## Spatel (May 2, 2011)

Gibby said:


> It's only a problem when you're a single child.


 And male.

Asexual women sometimes have kids in vitro. My aunt's asexual, and still raised two sons.


----------



## shmoo (May 2, 2011)

Gibby said:


> It's only a problem when you're a single child.


 
It shocks me to think that some parents demand that their children have kids.  To me, it seems to be the epitome of selfishness and pointlessness.  Why want grandchildren?  To carry on a family name?  The whole parents being disappointed in children not wanting to have their own kids is so annoying.  I mean... why!?  

"Oh no, a branch of the family has died out, waah!"

It's such a penurious way of thinking.  In the grand scale of things, though, what does on family or one branch of a family even matter?  Just because a family dies out doesn't make it the end of the world, it just means that someone was smart enough to stop bringing more people into this god-forsaken world.

Unless it's something other than wanting to carry on a family name or to want to care for another baby or something...  Just my two cents.


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 2, 2011)

shmoo said:


> I think I lol'ed a little bit after reading that in a british accent  (english accent).  I'll probably just leave everything until after my  gauntlet of tests, that's sensible.
> 
> As for her not accepting you, I don't really know what you should do.  I  mean, you could get all indignant and passionate about it and shout at  her for not accepting that you are gay (which is completely natural and  common, being gay) or you could keep quiet about it...  it's not like  who you like is anything to do with your mother?  You can't live by her  morals and views your whole life, so I don't know, maybe oppose her or  something (but bear in mind that she could kick you out the house [If  she can, how old are you?]).


 
English accents do make things better don't they?


But yah, she could kick me out since I am 16. Still, I could live with my friend Nick. And no, he is not a guy I like, he a friend I have had since first grade. So since I have known him for so long, it would be awkward to change our relationship from friends to a romantic relationship.


----------



## shmoo (May 2, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> English accents do make things better don't they?
> 
> 
> But yah, she could kick me out since I am 16. Still, I could live with my friend Nick. And no, he is not a guy I like, he a friend I have had since first grade. So since I have known him for so long, it would be awkward to change our relationship from friends to a romantic relationship.


 
They do xD Then just don't tell her if you don't want to.  I'm sure as hell not going to tell my parents I'm gay (I'm 16, even though they probably wouldn't take it badly).  The way you describe your friend it sounds like you actually do like him (a little bit), but yeah, you're probably right in not doing anything to try and become romantic in any way with him unless you like, _really_ like him.

It's weird, I go through phases of liking my best friends and stuff like that... I've never really acted on it... apart from this one time... actually it was a few times... I kinda regret it...

So yeah, probably a bad idea to act on impulse regarding close friends...

Kinda bored so... who do you like? (don't tell me the actual person of course but... whatever... killing time )


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 2, 2011)

A few guys in my Math class. Why an I telling you again? Oh right, I'm so sexy I'm irresistible. Don't lie, you're fantasizing about me right now.


----------



## shmoo (May 2, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> A few guys in my Math class. Why an I telling you again? Oh right, I'm so sexy I'm irresistible. Don't lie, you're fantasizing about me right now.


 
How... How did you know!? O_O

I mean, seriously.  I was just sitting here, fantasizing (not touching myself inappropriately or anything like that), and then you read my mind!?

I'm impressed by your mad mind reading skillz, it just turns me on even more :V

Awk I'm so tired... sleepy time for me 

P.S - I bet Maths is your favourite subject ;]?


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 2, 2011)

Oh god no, the teacher's an asshole. But they make it more tolerable.


----------



## shmoo (May 3, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Oh god no, the teacher's an asshole. But they make it more tolerable.


 
Don't you just hate asshole teachers?  I mean, how are you expected to learn a subject when there's some douchebag failure ruining other peoples' education.  Jeez, some teachers need an attitude adjustment (or, you know, a kick to the face or a hit from a car...)

At least it's tolerable  Maths kind of blows anyway...


----------



## Spatel (May 3, 2011)

shmoo said:


> It's such a penurious way of thinking.  In the grand scale of things, though, what does on family or one branch of a family even matter?  Just because a family dies out doesn't make it the end of the world, it just means that someone was smart enough to stop bringing more people into this god-forsaken world.


 
Too many sexy people dying off while uggos keep reproducing. It's a legitimate problem.


----------



## shmoo (May 3, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Too many sexy people dying off while uggos keep reproducing. It's a legitimate problem.


 
Oh my god.  When you put it that way...

I don't care xD  As long as there's somebody sexy enough for me that's around for as long as I'm alive then that's all that matters :]

Awk the uggos can go and make little uggo spawn.  I'll have my super sexy boyfriend until we die out, thank you. (P.S - I do not actually have this super sexy boyfriend :[ )

See, it's only a problem for the future generation, which non-breeders won't be a part of, so there's no problem ! (It's not like the human race matters... let's let them develop into little uggo demon spawn children monster things whilst we all disappear and elope with our beautiful significant others :] (P.S - I do not actually have one of these beautiful signifiant others :[  )


----------



## Spatel (May 3, 2011)

As long as there are bisexuals, there will be a fresh supply of homogenes in the future.


----------



## shmoo (May 3, 2011)

Spatel said:


> As long as there are bisexuals, there will be a fresh supply of homogenes in the future.


 
Why must you crush my argument xD

So.. you're asexual, yes?  So that means that you aren't attracted to either gender? :[  like... not even at all?   or a little bit?  (it makes me a little bit sad)


----------



## Spatel (May 3, 2011)

shmoo said:


> Why must you crush my argument xD
> 
> So.. you're asexual, yes?  So that means that you aren't attracted to either gender? :[  like... not even at all?   or a little bit?  (it makes me a little bit sad)


 Me? Good god no. I'm bisexual.

I'm passing my faggot genes on. DEAL WITH IT.


----------



## shmoo (May 3, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Me? Good god no. I'm bisexual.
> 
> I'm passing my faggot genes on. DEAL WITH IT.


 
Lol, oh sorry for some reason I got the impression you were asexual 

Passing your faggot genes on?  Hmm... I suppose I forgive you, as long as you don't have uggo children that are just going to breed and make more troll children 

Oo~oh, you're bi, are you?  [Insert shameless flirting here]

(night night)


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 3, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Me? Good god no. I'm bisexual.
> 
> I'm passing my faggot genes on. DEAL WITH IT.


 
Agreed.


----------



## shmoo (May 5, 2011)

Hmm... I think that's person number two that knows that I'm gay.  I was kind of talking about something with the person I think I like over xbox-live (hey don't judge me, it's like one big massive multi-person free phonecall) and he ended up saying, 

"Yeah, I hate fags," 

but he kind of said it in a nice way (Lol) but then he said, 

"Well, I only really hate the 'In your face' ones,"

and then I was like, "Yeah, me too, but I'm not really 'In your face,'"

and then he proceeded to imitate what an 'In your face' person would sound like xD.

So, from previous hints I've left him and the conversation I had with him, I think I can assume that he himself is not gay but that he's not that bothered by me being gay?  It doesn't really matter that much, anyway, I think we're becoming good friends/closer to each other anyway... (/delusions of reality)

So... any comments?


----------



## Spatel (May 5, 2011)

The camp stereotype wouldn't be such a problem if every other gay personality on TV weren't camp. It makes all gays look camp, but it's important to respect people that act that way. They're not ruining your sexual identity just by existing. It's the TV/Film industries you can blame for portraying everyone with stereotypes. Every minority gets painted unfairly. No one is safe.


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 5, 2011)

Not even the filmmakers are safe.


----------



## greg-the-fox (May 5, 2011)

Spatel said:


> The camp stereotype wouldn't be such a problem if every other gay personality on TV weren't camp. It makes all gays look camp, but it's important to respect people that act that way. They're not ruining your sexual identity just by existing. It's the TV/Film industries you can blame for portraying everyone with stereotypes. Every minority gets painted unfairly. No one is safe.


 
Sorry, but I hate camp gays with every fiber of my being
YOUR WRISTS AREN'T BROKEN, GEEZ
AND STOP TALKING THAT WAY


----------



## shmoo (May 6, 2011)

greg-the-fox said:


> Sorry, but I hate camp gays with every fiber of my being
> YOUR WRISTS AREN'T BROKEN, GEEZ
> AND STOP TALKING THAT WAY



^This...

Some boy was actually dressed up as a girl today at school, some boy in the year below me.... with makeup and a wig.  It just made me want to facepalm.  Not just at the fact that he felt the need to dress as a woman, but the fact that he was walking through the town like that!!  I don't even think it counts as crossdressing, but, whatever, it was such a fail.  I have no doubt in my mind right now that that kid is not straight but _c'mon_! Did he really need to, you know, be so weird and flamey and attention whore-y with it?..

Just when I was getting comfortably closer to my person I think I like then bam!  Scary facepalm inducing boy appears and makes things a bit awkward...

Still... I think I'm making some sort of progress, for friendship or otherwise...


----------



## greg-the-fox (May 6, 2011)

shmoo said:


> ^This...
> 
> Some boy was actually dressed up as a girl today at school, some boy in the year below me.... with makeup and a wig.  It just made me want to facepalm.  Not just at the fact that he felt the need to dress as a woman, but the fact that he was walking through the town like that!!  I don't even think it counts as crossdressing, but, whatever, it was such a fail.  I have no doubt in my mind right now that that kid is not straight but _c'mon_! Did he really need to, you know, be so weird and flamey and attention whore-y with it?..
> 
> ...


 
Hey, there is a such thing as transgender...
That's different


----------



## shmoo (May 6, 2011)

My post wasn't intended to discriminate or whatever...but still...


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 6, 2011)

Understandable.


----------



## greg-the-fox (May 6, 2011)

And I just wanna clarify, there's nothing wrong with being feminine or dressing feminine... but camp is NOT feminine, it's a bastardization of the gay community's idea of femininity. have you ever seen a girl act that way? To me camp just seems like a cry for negative attention


----------



## Yuma (May 6, 2011)

"Coming out" has been a mixed bag of goods for me. I am transexual and my mother petty much said my father will disown me... so coming out isn't very fun... plus I live on a very small island where everyone knows everyone else. 

I told my boss and he gave me his phone number and since has been extremely nice to me... It's a mixed bag of goods... best way to describe it...


----------



## Bliss (May 6, 2011)

At least your mother stands by you and you do have a great boss. 

*And camp is awesome by the way.*


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 6, 2011)

Yuma said:


> "Coming out" has been a mixed bag of goods for me. I am transexual and my mother petty much said my father will disown me... so coming out isn't very fun... plus I live on a very small island where everyone knows everyone else.
> 
> I told my boss and he gave me his phone number and since has been extremely nice to me... It's a mixed bag of goods... best way to describe it...



So what, you'r a guy who dresses like a woman? Is that what you're saying?


----------



## Bliss (May 6, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> So what, you'r a guy who dresses like a woman? Is that what you're saying?



She clearly said she is a transsexual, darling.


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 6, 2011)

I ned a new pair of glasses badly, sorry about that, bad screen and shit. I'm going to shut up now.


----------



## Spatel (May 10, 2011)

greg-the-fox said:


> And I just wanna clarify, there's nothing wrong with being feminine or dressing feminine... but camp is NOT feminine, it's a bastardization of the gay community's idea of femininity. have you ever seen a girl act that way? To me camp just seems like a cry for negative attention


I think when some people find out they're gay, they want to establish a strong identity to express it and they latch onto the stereotypes and tropes they're familiar with and run them into the ground. Maybe they have no other noteworthy personality traits. Maybe their gayness is the only thing they have going for them. Some people just get a rush from being really different.

Very often lesbians go through an adjustment period where they just don't want to see or interact with men for a while. I think it's a similar phenomenon. They get off on being part of a closed community and they develop a strong emotional attachment to that community, and an aversion to anyone outside of it.

There's a lot of identity politics in the queer movement. I think it's a bit of a problem.


----------



## narutonfuzzi (May 15, 2011)

i would never come out, but of coarse i am straigth Â¦o


----------



## Kivaari (May 18, 2011)

I just came out to my dad, the person I was most afraid to tell. He just didn't really know what to say about it. I'm alive, and still living in the same house, so I'm happy.


----------



## Milo (May 19, 2011)

greg-the-fox said:


> And I just wanna clarify, there's nothing wrong with being feminine or dressing feminine... but camp is NOT feminine, it's a bastardization of the gay community's idea of femininity. have you ever seen a girl act that way? To me camp just seems like a cry for negative attention


 
inorite. I tried being that camp gay shit once... I only did it the first year I was finding out about my sexuality. don't even like to think about it :S

but yea, now I like the manly side.... even though I myself am not manly.


----------



## Bliss (May 19, 2011)

Sponge Cat said:


> I just came out to my dad, the person I was most afraid to tell. He just didn't really know what to say about it. I'm alive, and still living in the same house, so I'm happy.



Congratulations. I hope you don't have to educate him about sexuality or anything. :3


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 19, 2011)

Milo said:


> inorite. I tried being that camp gay shit once... I only did it the first year I was finding out about my sexuality. don't even like to think about it :S
> 
> but yea, now I like the manly side.... even though I myself am not manly.


 
Tough guys all the way, its just annoying when they are to flamboyant, most people don't hate you because your gay. They hate you because you are annoying. Dont mean to offend anyone, but thats about the long and short of it.


----------



## Spatel (May 19, 2011)

I don't like completely macho straight-presenting guys, or rainbow-shitting faggots. There's an acceptable middle-ground. 

Piercings and cool hair, yes. Lisp... no.


----------



## Bliss (May 19, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Piercings and cool hair, yes. *Lisp... no.*



For some that just happens. Like an accent or a pregnancy. :3


----------



## Isen (May 26, 2011)

I'm slowly but surely coming out, though I don't feel like "coming out" is the right phrase.  One by one, I've been telling my close friends.  Sooner or later, I'll probably just say "Fuck it" and change shit on facebook or something.  Almost all of my close friends at college know at this point.  It's weird to think that anybody knows.

Huh


----------



## Spatel (May 29, 2011)

I answered a survey on another site and didn't realize it was linked to facebook. My profile literally said I was bisexual right there on the front page for 24 hours without me noticing.

Fuck facebook.

Now the waiting game begins... to see how many of my conservative catholic relatives noticed.


----------



## Bliss (May 29, 2011)

Spatel said:


> I answered a survey on another site and didn't realize it was linked to facebook. My profile literally said I was bisexual right there on the front page for 24 hours without me noticing.
> 
> Fuck facebook.
> 
> Now the waiting game begins... to see how many of my conservative catholic relatives noticed.


I've always preached about the perils of Facebook! 

Is this is a complete bomb for them? Does anyone know?


----------



## Aura~wolf (May 29, 2011)

I told my mom first that I wanted a fursuit, and once I explained that to her, I told her that I was a furry and explained it to her. She had heard a few negative things about furries, but took my word for it. She is very supportive and thinks of it as a creative outlet, because she knows that I've been drawing my wolf characters since 5th grade. She's letting me buy a fursuit and she's going to MFF and AC with me (MFF before I get my suit, AC after) because she wants to see what the fandom is all about, and also because I'm a year shy of driving. lol.
I told my dad and he couldn't have cared less. He was like, "whatever you want."
My twin sister and little brother on the other hand, hate me for it. My sis wants nothing to do with it and whenever we are in a fight or arguement, she'll use it against me. And my little brother never ceases to pick on me about it. Even when I threaten to claw his hair out. lol.


----------



## Darkwing (May 29, 2011)

Spatel said:


> I answered a survey on another site and didn't realize it was linked to facebook. My profile literally said I was bisexual right there on the front page for 24 hours without me noticing.
> 
> Fuck facebook.
> 
> Now the waiting game begins... to see how many of my conservative catholic relatives noticed.



Oh God, yeah, that's why I avoid surveys and shit =I 

Don't worry though, it's a dumb survey, they probably wouldn't take it seriously at all.



Aura~wolf said:


> I told my mom first that I wanted a fursuit, and once I explained that to her, I told her that I was a furry and explained it to her. She had heard a few negative things about furries, but took my word for it. She is very supportive and thinks of it as a creative outlet, because she knows that I've been drawing my wolf characters since 5th grade. She's letting me buy a fursuit and she's going to MFF and AC with me (MFF before I get my suit, AC after) because she wants to see what the fandom is all about, and also because I'm a year shy of driving. lol.
> I told my dad and he couldn't have cared less. He was like, "whatever you want."
> My twin sister and little brother on the other hand, hate me for it. My sis wants nothing to do with it and whenever we are in a fight or arguement, she'll use it against me. And my little brother never ceases to pick on me about it. Even when I threaten to claw his hair out. lol.


 
AHHHH!!!

YOU DO NOT COME OUT AS A FURRY 

FURRY IS A HOBBY!!! 

http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...YOU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!
http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...YOU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!
http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...YOU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!
http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...YOU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!
http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...YOU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!

GODDAMMIT!!!


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 29, 2011)

Spatel said:


> I answered a survey on another site and didn't realize it was linked to facebook. My profile literally said I was bisexual right there on the front page for 24 hours without me noticing.
> 
> Fuck facebook.
> 
> Now the waiting game begins... to see how many of my conservative catholic relatives noticed.


 
Yah, I think we have all done something like this before. Thankfully I only give my facebook name to a few friends, but its a fake name to keep my family away. I did something like this and I just clicked Okay on this box without reading it, and thankfully I hid it before any damage could be done.


----------



## Spatel (May 29, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> AHHHH!!!
> YOU DO NOT COME OUT AS A FURRY
> FURRY IS A HOBBY!!!


 
Eh, I had to tell my folks I was a furry at one point. It was definitely an awkward conversation. I think 'coming out' is an appropriate term if you're a lifestyler, but yeah this isn't the thread for that.


----------



## shaaaark (May 29, 2011)

Sponge Cat said:


> I just came out to my dad, the person I was most afraid to tell. He just didn't really know what to say about it. I'm alive, and still living in the same house, so I'm happy.


 
Hoping I can do the some thing at some point. Good for you, though.


----------



## Kivaari (May 30, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> Congratulations. I hope you don't have to educate him about sexuality or anything. :3


He just doesn't see why someone would be attracted to guys. He mentioned something about girls having more stuff on their playground, lol.



shaaaark said:


> Hoping I can do the some thing at some point. Good for you, though.


Don't be afraid, unless you really believe something bad is likely to happen if you tell him. Parents usually love their kids, and I don't think this is likely to change that. I thought my dad was the most likely to reject me out of anyone I knew, but he has actually been very accepting and supportive.


----------



## Bliss (May 30, 2011)

Sponge Cat said:


> He just doesn't see why someone would be attracted to guys. He mentioned something about girls having more stuff on their playground, lol.


*Holy Dawg! *D:>



> Don't be afraid, unless you really believe something bad is likely to happen if you tell him. Parents usually love their kids, and I don't think this is likely to change that. I thought my dad was the most likely to reject me out of anyone I knew, but he has actually been very accepting and supportive.


Yeah, people can surprise you.

BTW I think I turned my mum pro-gay marriage. :J


----------



## shaaaark (May 30, 2011)

.


----------



## Hateful Bitch (May 30, 2011)

came out to my parents
OH IT'S JUST A PHASE

came out to a friend
OH IT'S JUST A PHASE

So yeah I pretty much gave up after that. I'll get round to it again eventually. Both of those were about 2 years ago.


----------



## Lemoncholic (May 30, 2011)

Hateful Bitch said:


> came out to my parents
> OH IT'S JUST A PHASE
> 
> came out to a friend
> ...



Get walked in on mid-buttsex = No longer a phase

Also when typing this, I accidentally typed muttsex instead of buttsex, know how awkward that could be?


----------



## shaaaark (May 30, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> Also when typing this, I accidentally typed muttsex instead of buttsex, know how awkward that could be?


 
Around these people... not very.


----------



## Radiohead (May 30, 2011)

My coming out story, copy and pasted for your viewing pleasure. 

So, I came out to my parents about 2 weeks before moving. I wrote out what was going on. I wish I could have spoken it to them, but writing would have to suffice. 

I went to their house to pick up some stuff to take with me when I moved. While we sat down to dinner, I nervously placed my writing pad in the center of the table. Mom picked it up first, looked over it, and then handed to my father. She seemed unsure of what to say. My dad took it, nodded, and handed it back to me.

â€œWell that explains it, at least,â€ he said. I kind of tilted my head, and suddenly noticed my parents couldnâ€™t keep a straight face. I kept looking at them, not sure what to think.

â€œItâ€™s justâ€¦â€ my mom started giggling like a kid. My dad, trying (and failing) to keep his face straight, said,

â€œYesterday we were moving your mattress and found some porn mags under it.â€

Oh god. I just DIED of embarrassment. Seriously just curled up and turned a hundred shades of red. My mom and dad decided it was a good time to talk about their experiences of being caught with porn.

My parents were cool about it, but they told me I couldnâ€™t have my mags back until I did the dishes. I did them rather begrudgingly but I couldnâ€™t help smiling. 

I love my parents.


----------



## Darkwing (May 30, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> Get walked in on mid-buttsex = No longer a phase


 
Pretty much the only way to get them to believe :3 

That's how I plan on coming out. 

*In mid-buttsex* 

"HEY MOM AND DAD COME HERE!!!"


----------



## Hateful Bitch (May 30, 2011)

Radiohead said:


> My coming out story, copy and pasted for your viewing pleasure.
> 
> So, I came out to my parents about 2 weeks before moving. I wrote out what was going on. I wish I could have spoken it to them, but writing would have to suffice.
> 
> ...


 
I feel cool because I read this on your tumblr before you posted here.
It's a good story <:


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## Bliss (May 30, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> That's how I plan on coming out.
> 
> *In mid-buttsex*
> 
> "HEY MOM AND DAD COME HERE!!!"


I hope the other party is consent with this. If not, chances are that your butt _will_ get hurt. In a bad, bad way. :V


----------



## Radiohead (May 30, 2011)

Hateful Bitch said:


> I feel cool because I read this on your tumblr before you posted here.
> It's a good story <:


 
People read my tumblr? D:

I'm glad you like it. I still get red if I think about it, though. Dad sent me an email the other day saying he had some vintage Playboy issues if I wanted them. Needless to say I snatched up that chance. Every Playboy issue from 1970 to 1999 I believe.


----------



## Darkwing (May 30, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> I hope the other party is consent with this. If not, chances are that your butt _will_ get hurt. In a bad, bad way. :V


 
Hurt in a bad way? You mean in a good way, right? :3 

Though being serious, that's not how I'm gonna come out lol. I'm not even gonna say anything to my parents about it. Maybe I'll tell them once I get a date. But maybe I won't and a few PDA's should give them an idea :3


----------



## Grey Wolverine (May 30, 2011)

Radiohead said:


> My coming out story, copy and pasted for your viewing pleasure.
> 
> So, I came out to my parents about 2 weeks before moving. I wrote out what was going on. I wish I could have spoken it to them, but writing would have to suffice.
> 
> ...


 
Oh god, I have to say, that has made my day.


----------



## Aura~wolf (May 30, 2011)

I know, it's a hobby, but I still had to tell my parents at some point.


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## Schwimmwagen (May 30, 2011)

Aura~wolf said:


> I know, it's a hobby, but I still had to tell my parents at some point.


 
... God damn it, what?


----------



## Radiohead (May 30, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Oh god, I have to say, that has made my day.


 
So glad <3

My parents are so awesome. They let me make most of my major life decisions. They offered advice but never pressured me to do anything exactly like them. They let me pick my religion, what I ate on the regular basis (and I learned pretty quick that unhealthy food makes me feel like crap), political stance, sexuality, gender - they're amazing. I want to give everyone parents like mine. 83


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## Lemoncholic (May 30, 2011)

shaaaark said:


> Around these people... not very.


 
I don't know, judging from what I've seen admitting to doggy diddling around here is asking for people to hate you.



Radiohead said:


> My coming out story, copy and pasted for your viewing pleasure.
> 
> So, I came out to my parents about 2 weeks before moving. I wrote out what was going on. I wish I could have spoken it to them, but writing would have to suffice.
> 
> ...



People still buy porn mags nowadays?



Darkwing said:


> Pretty much the only way to get them to believe :3
> 
> That's how I plan on coming out.
> 
> ...



Alternative methods include doing it with the door "accidentally" left open, on the living room sofa when you know they're due home soon or just making loud noises that make it sound like you're in pain.

I mean another way to get them to believe is to be in a same sex commited relationship for a few years, but that takes time and effort. Butt sex less so


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## Radiohead (May 30, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> People still buy porn mags nowadays?


 
I didn't buy them, I acquired them from my older brother who bought them.


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## Hir (May 30, 2011)

Aura~wolf said:


> I know, it's a hobby, but I still had to tell my parents at some point.


 
haaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahaahahahahaaahaahaahhaahahaahahahahaahaaaaaaaaaaaa


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## shaaaark (May 30, 2011)

I could easily do it today and get it over with. But in the back woods in Alabama, in a largely religious family, I don't think it's time... not here.


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## Grey Wolverine (May 30, 2011)

Radiohead said:


> So glad <3
> 
> My parents are so awesome. They let me make most of my major life decisions. They offered advice but never pressured me to do anything exactly like them. They let me pick my religion, what I ate on the regular basis (and I learned pretty quick that unhealthy food makes me feel like crap), political stance, sexuality, gender - they're amazing. I want to give everyone parents like mine. 83


 
Your parents sound cool.


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## Sar (Jun 9, 2011)

Loken said:


> aaah, a fresh thread.
> 
> Anyway just a question, as I grew up in quite a small (hick) town and I am quite recently 'out' of said 'closet,' well to most people anyway I notice a problem.  Though I am in the 'big city' now I find that finding gay people is still quite difficult, the only one who I really know is married.  So do I just ask random guys out and 90% will be straight or am I forced to go to some gay bar?  lol Pardon my ignorance.


 
Gay bar at first. 
Try googling your city + gay. It's Super Effective!


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## Isen (Jun 16, 2011)

I told my parents.

They already knew _something_ was up, and I didn't want to keep hiding things from people.  They really love me, I know.  I knew how they would respond.  My dad is a pastor.  A counseling pastor.  They basically told me "We wondered if it was something like this, and we think we know why you struggle with bisexuality."  Yeah, struggle, right.  Basically, they told me how emotional trauma with some guys in my class way back in junior high caused the way I experience intimacy with guys to be warped.  So basically, "We love you no matter what, and we don't blame you for being damaged."

Feeling kind of shitty about the whole thing.  I need to get my mind off of this. :[


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## Bliss (Jun 16, 2011)

Isen said:


> Basically, they told me how emotional trauma with some guys in my class way back in junior high caused the way I experience intimacy with guys to be warped.  So basically, "*We love you no matter what, and we don't blame you for being damaged.*"
> 
> Feeling kind of shitty about the whole thing.  I need to get my mind off of this. :[


Are you going to leave it at that? >;C


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## Isen (Jun 16, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> Are you going to leave it at that? >;C


Not entirely sure what you mean.  I'm not hopeful about changing their minds on this issue.  They are both firmly conservative Christians.  They believe that homosexuality is caused by deep psychological and spiritual damage that causes how one experiences intimacy to malfunction.  According to them, though not all gays choose to be gay, acting on that attraction is a sin, and gays should be loved and encouraged to work out their issues until their faulty, damaged attractions are fixed.  They mean well, I guess.  Christian counseling is my dad's job.  He does plenty of good stuff, like help really depressed people and save marriages.  Just so happens that part of his job is also helping gay people "overcome homosexuality".   

I knew how my parents would react, and I know why they reacted that way.  It wasn't surprising or anything.  It still hurts, of course.  I believe they don't get it, and they think I'm self-deceived and not being intellectually honest with myself.  This wasn't an upset gut reaction on their part.  However hurtful their beliefs on the issue may be, they are consistent with their firmly held religious worldview and they honestly mean well.

I'm not mad at them or anything.  I knew this would go this way.  I just feel really alone right now.


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## Bliss (Jun 16, 2011)

Isen said:


> According to them, though not all gays choose to be gay, acting on that attraction is a sin, and gays should be loved and encouraged to work out their issues until their faulty, damaged attractions are fixed.


I only hope you won't 'conform' to that.



> However hurtful their beliefs on the issue may be, they are consistent with their firmly held religious worldview and they honestly mean well.


I would not take that as an excuse. I'd hit them with a book, with reality. As long as it takes.



> I'm not mad at them or anything.  I knew this would go this way.  I just feel really alone right now.


You are not alone (and I can be mad on behalf of you ^^) but it worries me how you just accept their dogma. It seems _so_ wrong.


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## Spatel (Jun 16, 2011)

Isen said:


> They mean well, I guess.  Christian counseling is my dad's job.  He  does plenty of good stuff, like help really depressed people and save  marriages.  Just so happens that part of his job is also helping gay  people "overcome homosexuality".


 
I'm sure he's trying to do what he thinks is right, in his own limited way. Meanwhile, the rest of us are going to do our job to help gay people "overcome christianity".


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## Randy-Darkshade (Jun 16, 2011)

Spatel said:


> I'm sure he's trying to do what he thinks is right, in his own limited way. Meanwhile, the rest of us are going to do our job to help gay people "overcome christianity".



Christianity = BS, but that is for another thread.

Being gay is not a choice. 

I'm pretty sure straight people don't choose to be straight. I'll also bet money you can't get a straight man to choose to be gay or a gay man to suddenly choose to be straight, because, sexuality isn't a conscious choice.



Isen said:


> Not entirely sure what you mean.  I'm not hopeful  about changing their minds on this issue.  They are both firmly  conservative Christians.  They believe that homosexuality is caused by  deep psychological and spiritual damage that causes how one experiences  intimacy to malfunction.  According to them, though not all gays choose  to be gay, acting on that attraction is a sin, and gays should be loved  and encouraged to work out their issues until their faulty, damaged  attractions are fixed.  They mean well, I guess.  Christian counseling  is my dad's job.  He does plenty of good stuff, like help really  depressed people and save marriages.  Just so happens that part of his  job is also helping gay people "overcome homosexuality".



The only one's who need any form of counseling are your parents to overcome the brainwash bullshit Christianity offers people.


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## Isen (Jun 16, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> I only hope you won't 'conform' to that.


Of course not.



> You are not alone (and I can be mad on behalf of you ^^) but it worries me how you just accept their dogma. It seems _so_ wrong.


I don't "accept their dogma", but I also know why they believe what they do and realize that there's nothing I can do to change their minds.  Trying to do so would just alienate me further from my family.



Randy-Darkshade said:


> Being gay is not a choice.
> 
> I'm pretty sure straight people don't choose to be straight. I'll also bet money you can't get a straight man to choose to be gay or a gay man to suddenly choose to be straight, because, sexuality isn't a conscious choice.


I'm pretty sure they don't think being gay is a conscious choice.  More like they see it as a weird psychological condition caused by a mishmash of things that ultimately make one predisposed to a particular kind of "sinful behavior".


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## Spatel (Jun 16, 2011)

Randy-Darkshade said:


> I'm pretty sure straight people don't choose to be straight. I'll also bet money you can't get a straight man to choose to be gay or a gay man to suddenly choose to be straight, because, sexuality isn't a conscious choice.


 Your brain sees fertility in one gender or the other (or neither). That is hardwired and can never change.

I will slightly disagree with the second bit though. I think it is possible for environmental and emotional factors to change someone's preference towards the gender they don't see fertility in. A fair number of lesbians seem to be women that just gave up on dating men--too many bad experiences. I think a lot of gay guys out there are in the same boat. It works different ways for different people.

That's why I think psychologists and neurologists need to do a better job breaking homosexuals up into groups, rather than studying them as a homogenous entity. They'll never figure out how it works if they do that.

You have "hyperfeminized homosexual males", "homoromantic asexuals", and then several kinds of bisexuals that lean heavily gay for a variety of environmental reasons.


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## Larry (Jun 16, 2011)

I'm _still_ bi-curious. But here's the thing:

For the lulz, lately I "enchanced" my behavior (online and RL), and now some of my friends are suspecting that I'm, at least, _not straight_. I really don't know my sexuality and I'm not sure when I will, but it seems like I'm coming out accidently, and not the right way. 

It's not really much of a problem, but I seriously don't want to give out the wrong signals, or want to leave any false impressions on anyone.  But this is what I get for acting stupid.


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## Mentova (Jun 19, 2011)

I drunkenly came out to my aunt today.

Apparently she's bi as well. Guess you learn something new every day. :V

She's the only one IRL that I've told as well.


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## Schwimmwagen (Jun 19, 2011)

I'm coming to the point where I am starting to get _really fucking irritated_ every time my family members keep talking about me as being straight. In addition to that, it's their use of terms related to homosexuality as insults. Hnng.


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## Mentova (Jun 19, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I'm coming to the point where I am starting to get _really fucking irritated_ every time my family members keep talking about me as being straight. In addition to that, it's their use of terms related to homosexuality as insults. Hnng.


 This is why I haven't told my dad yet. He doesn't hate gays, but he talks about it as if it's something negative. I don't want him to freak if I say I'm bi.


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## Schwimmwagen (Jun 19, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> This is why I haven't told my dad yet. He doesn't hate gays, but he talks about it as if it's something negative. I don't want him to freak if I say I'm bi.


 
Well, you're bi leaning straight, aren't you? I wouldn't say you even need to talk about it if that's the case, if you were leaning more towards men then I'd say it is a bit of a topic. But yeah, I can't decide if my dad hates gays or not. My cousin is flamingly gay, and my uncle is in total denial and my dad thinks it's hilarious and he is _really_ glad that he is not in that "poor bastard's" situation. ~ooohhhh~ :V


----------



## SnowFox (Jun 19, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Well, you're bi leaning straight, aren't you? I wouldn't say you even need to talk about it if that's the case, if you were leaning more towards men then I'd say it is a bit of a topic. But yeah, I can't decide if my dad hates gays or not. My cousin is flamingly gay, and my uncle is in total denial and my dad thinks it's hilarious and he is _really_ glad that he is not in that "poor bastard's" situation. ~ooohhhh~ :V


 
I think it's time to buy you a skirt, Gibby.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Jun 19, 2011)

SnowFox said:


> I think it's time to buy you a skirt, Gibby.


 
Manscaping first.


----------



## Mentova (Jun 19, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Well, you're bi leaning straight, aren't you? I wouldn't say you even need to talk about it if that's the case, if you were leaning more towards men then I'd say it is a bit of a topic. But yeah, I can't decide if my dad hates gays or not. My cousin is flamingly gay, and my uncle is in total denial and my dad thinks it's hilarious and he is _really_ glad that he is not in that "poor bastard's" situation. ~ooohhhh~ :V


 Yes I am bi leaning straight. Girls are the best but can't go wrong with a nice dicking from time to time. :V

And sorry to hear that. That does not sound like a good situation.


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## Larry (Jun 19, 2011)

Heckler & Koch said:


> Yes I am bi leaning straight. Girls are the best but can't go wrong with a *nice dicking* from time to time. :V


Wow, that was painful to read...

Um, guys? I think I'm ready to come out as bi-sexual. The thing is, I really don't have a clue who to tell, much less know who's safe to tell (I have a LOT of big-mouthed friends). I'm VERY fucking sure that I'm not telling my parents, since they're not gay-friendly people. I have some friends that are understanding, and that they'll still love me, but I have the bravery of a mouse. I can't bear the reaction, knowing what I just said.

I always thought that maybe I should live my entire life in the closet; I don't tell my friends/family and I live my life as bi. But I can't lie to myself and hide my (future) partner from others. That wouldn't be right at all.

What's better for me to do, guys?


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## Mr. Brightside (Jun 19, 2011)

larry669 said:


> I always thought that maybe I should live my entire life in the closet; I don't tell my friends/family and I live my life as bi. But I can't lie to myself and hide my (future) partner from others. That wouldn't be right at all.


 This is what I'm doing right now.  Then again, you have at least a few friends that wouldn't mind and wouldn't tell.  

My parents would either disown me, send me to a mental ward/correctional facility, or, worst of all, lie to themselves that I'm joking for the rest of their lives.  They very much despise gays with the burning passion of 1,000 hells, and everyone in my school, especially most of my friends in the school, are very much the same, with the exception of a few who wouldn't mind, but would fuck off and tell the entire school.  I'd probably be ostracized and then lynched if I ever came out as bi.  

If your area's the same, then you'd be better off keeping it inside and then immediately leaving once you graduate for somewhere a bit better.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Jun 19, 2011)

I'unno, Larry. I think 15 is a bit of an early age to come out at. I'm 16, almost 17, and I have no intention of coming out until I'm at least living away from my family.


----------



## Ekho (Jun 19, 2011)

larry669 said:


> Wow, that was painful to read...
> 
> Um, guys? I think I'm ready to come out as bi-sexual. The thing is, I really don't have a clue who to tell, much less know who's safe to tell (I have a LOT of big-mouthed friends). I'm VERY fucking sure that I'm not telling my parents, since they're not gay-friendly people. I have some friends that are understanding, and that they'll still love me, but I have the bravery of a mouse. I can't bear the reaction, knowing what I just said.
> 
> ...



It sounds like it would be best to go to your friends who are most understanding (and hopefully not the loud-mouthed ones).  Hopefully they can be supportive and listen to anything you need to tell them.  Out of curiosity, do you have any siblings or other close family members who be more understanding?  

And I know what you mean about bravery.  I want to tell my parents first and then my brothers that I'm gay, and I'm pretty sure they'll all be OK with it.  But I'm still so afraid to tell them. :/


----------



## Larry (Jun 19, 2011)

SecretlyAFK said:


> This is what I'm doing right now. Then again, you have at least a few friends that wouldn't mind and wouldn't tell.
> 
> *My parents would either disown me, send me to a mental ward/correctional facility, or, worst of all, lie to themselves that I'm joking for the rest of their lives.* They very much despise gays with the burning passion of 1,000 hells, and everyone in my school, especially most of my friends in the school, are very much the same, with the exception of a few who wouldn't mind, but would fuck off and tell the entire school. I'd probably be ostracized and then lynched if I ever came out as bi.
> 
> If your area's the same, then you'd be better off keeping it inside and then immediately leaving once you graduate for somewhere a bit better.


Same here. Once I'm older, and have the requirements to live by myself, I will move out immediately. Maybe then I won't feel tension everytime something about my sexuality comes up.


Gibby said:


> *I'unno, Larry. I think 15 is a bit of an early age to come out at.* I'm 16, almost 17, and I have no intention of coming out until I'm at least living away from my family.


I guess you're right about that. But, I've kinda been feeling affection for boys, as well as girls, since I was like 12. I thought it was just a temporary "change", and that I'll be straight in the end, but I still feel the same. I never forced myself into liking boys, it was natural. That's what gives me the reason that I know I'm into my own sex. And three years is a lot of time, and the time was very early, so that's why I feel like I should come out to someone at my age.


Ekho said:


> It sounds like it would be best to go to your friends who are most understanding (and hopefully not the loud-mouthed ones). Hopefully they can be supportive and listen to anything you need to tell them. *Out of curiosity, do you have any siblings or other close family members who be more understanding?
> *
> *And I know what you mean about bravery. I want to tell my parents first and then my brothers that I'm gay, and I'm pretty sure they'll all be OK with it. But I'm still so afraid to tell them. :/*



I think ALL of my female cousins would understand ('cause well, they're young and female. Yeah, I do feel more comfortable if I came out to a woman than a man), but I really don't think anyone else in my family would be understanding. Either way, I don't think I'll ever tell anyone in my family that I'm gay. They're just gonna have to try hard to find out.

I'm glad that your parents would be the first one you'll tell, but for me, my parents will be the last--scratch that--THEY WILL NEVER KNOW.


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Jun 20, 2011)

Well damn, I have a problem and I don't quite know what to do about it. See, I met this nice guy a little bit ago, and I think things may become more than friends, lets leave it at that. Anyways, here is the problem, I have a friend everyone calls Jamie and he is a nice guy, but we have these weird text wars and he sent me one that said "I want you Evan" and my Mother found it. Immediately she started asking me who Jamie is and when I said "Well everyone calls him Jamie" she yelled at me "EVAN! YOU'RE A FAG! What is wrong with you!" than I had to explain these texting wars. So the problem is this, she and my 2 sisters, and my brother are all homophobic, what do I do? And yes, you really are the only people I can ask about this.


----------



## Mr. Brightside (Jun 20, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> So the problem is this, she and my 2 sisters, and my brother are all homophobic, what do I do? And yes, you really are the only people I can ask about this.


 I'm not re-posting what I did for Larry.  Look back since it does have some relevance.  Also, yeah, I feel the same way about FAF, sadly.


----------



## Bliss (Jun 20, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> So the problem is this, she and my 2 sisters, and my brother are all homophobic, what do I do? And yes, you really are the only people I can ask about this.


Hit them with your purse, so to speak.


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## BlooPonie (Jun 20, 2011)

I am very confused right now. I have a sort of feeling that I might be bi and it is bugging me. Not that I am against people that are bi or gay it is just my parents are very strict on these types of things. And I don't really care about if the person I am dating is a man or a woman (usually perfer women just so my dad doesn't find out, unless the guy is really my type, in which case I will be super sneaky). Just told my best friend and he is cool with it. I am just really confused right now...

Also, I just decided to accept it very recently (kinda). I am a somewhat feminine (spelled wrong) person and still not 100% sure if I am bi or not. And another reason I don't wanna tell my parents is that my mom is a very strict Christian. I am still a christian but less so. And finally, has anyone ever felt that they are not sure if their sexuality and what to do?


----------



## Larry (Jun 22, 2011)

BlooPonie said:


> I am very confused right now. I have a sort of feeling that I might be bi and it is bugging me. Not that I am against people that are bi or gay it is just my parents are very strict on these types of things. And I don't really care about if the person I am dating is a man or a woman (usually perfer women just so my dad doesn't find out, unless the guy is really my type, in which case I will be super sneaky). Just told my best friend and he is cool with it. I am just really confused right now...
> 
> Also, I just decided to accept it very recently (kinda). I am a somewhat feminine (spelled wrong) person and still not 100% sure if I am bi or not. And another reason I don't wanna tell my parents is that my mom is a very strict Christian. I am still a christian but less so. And finally, has anyone ever felt that they are not sure if their sexuality and what to do?


I've gone through the same thing you're going through. Personally, fuck anyone that goes against you for being "different", and don't like that strict parenting shit stop you from naturally feeling what you feel. I think it's okay for you not to tell your parents when they're obviously against homosexuality (that's what I'm doing) Knowing what your sexual orientation is what you're going have to find out on your own. Hope you have fun. :3


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## William (Jun 23, 2011)

I came out to my parents when I was 16. Even now they still think it's a phase. My dad likes to "playfully" tease me about it, like saying "So you still like suckin dick, don't ya boy?" He's a hardass, military guy. I tried to prove him wrong. I started working out and exercising to be more manly. But no matter how many miles I run, or how much I can bench press, he doesn't give a shit. When I was younger, all I wanted was acceptance. Now that I'm older and there's still none of that, I don't know what I want. 
My mom is too chickenshit to disagree with my dad, so she tried to convince me to just "be normal around my father". She also tried to convince me it was a phase.

When I hit 18, I moved out and lived with a friend for 2 years, then moved up here to Chicago. I'm still pissed at my parents but I call them to make sure they're doing okay as often as I can. Call me a traditionalist but I still think family should keep in contact regardless of things you think they should change. I was never abused or neglected, we just didn't agree on a lot of things. 

Tl;dr it went badly.


----------



## Larry (Jun 23, 2011)

*Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

After receiving advice from the Coming Out thread, and having a long thought about it, I finally became a man and summoned up the courage.

*I FINALLY CAME OUT TO SOMEONE.*

I came out to one of my female friends at church through text messaging. Even though we were three feet away, we were in a room full of people, and I only wanted her to know. It was a very long process. She was joking around in the beginning by telling me she didn't know who I was. Then, it took me five minutes to press the send button, knowing that I was about to make a milestone in my life:
Me: "I'm bi."
Her:"You're also (my name)."
Me:"I'm being serious."
Her:"I know."
She asked a shitload of questions, and some of them were kinda aimed at her cute boyfriend. All in all, she was understanding, something that I was really hoping for. I kinda felt some weight lifted off after coming out, and it feels good.

So now, I am officially bisexual, leaning on gay. I really don't know if I should've posted this in the Coming Out thread, but this was a remarkable moment in my life for me, so I'm kinda raving about this. I hope you don't mind. :3

tl;dr (seriously?): I'm bi, came out to a girl, I feel relieved, raving about this.


----------



## CannotWait (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Congratulations?


----------



## Larry (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



CannotWait said:


> Congratulations?



Thanks. :3c


----------



## dinosaurdammit (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Hmmmmm. Somehow I am not surprised. Glad it worked out for you and all. Some people lose friends over it. Tis petty really. I don't care who you love or who you bone just make sure it's healthy for both. (emotionally and physically)


----------



## CannonFodder (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Congratulations, and I'm glad it went so well.
Also that was a smart move using your cell phone since alot of people were around.
http://www.greetingcarduniverse.com/Occasions-Congratulations-Coming+out+of+the+Closet
Oh hey I just found out there's, "coming out of the closet" cards.




also inb4 impending shitfest


----------



## Cyanide_tiger (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Until it is otherwise stated, I assume all males within the fandom to be gay. :V


----------



## Paul'o'fox (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Congratulations, I fist came out to a christian female friend too.


----------



## CannonFodder (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



Paul'o'fox said:


> Congratulations, I fist came out to a christian female friend too.


 What was her reaction?


----------



## Aden (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

I did an experiment a few years ago and found that it was a lot easier to come out as bi to people than just "gay". It's like they get offended if you don't find their sex sexually attractive (or don't share their attraction for the opposite sex).

Also congrats. Great feeling, isn't it?


----------



## dinosaurdammit (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



CannonFodder said:


> also *inb4* impending shitfest


 
STOP THAT >:C
NO MORE INB4 POST EVER NO MATTER THE CONTEXT >>::CC- actually refer to my avi for the true expression.


----------



## Larry (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



Paul'o'fox said:


> Congratulations, I *fist* came out to a christian female friend too.


I have such a dirty mind.


dinosaurdammit said:


> Hmmmmm. Somehow I am not surprised. Glad it worked out for you and all. Some people lose friends over it. Tis petty really. I don't care who you love or who you bone just make sure it's healthy for both. (emotionally and physically)


That's what I was worrying about. Losing her as a friend, but I'm glad it didn't happen.


CannonFodder said:


> Congratulations, and I'm glad it went so well.
> Also that was a smart move using your cell phone since alot of people were around.
> http://www.greetingcarduniverse.com/Occasions-Congratulations-Coming+out+of+the+Closet
> Oh hey I just found out there's, "coming out of the closet" cards.
> ...


*holds up shield* I'm ready.


----------



## Mr. Brightside (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Well, you've passed me on the manhood scale.  By far.  And I thought you said there was no-one quiet enough for you to come out to...  Well...  Congrats, man!


----------



## CannonFodder (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



Aden said:


> I did an experiment a few years ago and found that it was a lot easier to come out as bi to people than just "gay". It's like they get offended if you don't find their sex sexually attractive (or don't share their attraction for the opposite sex).
> 
> Also congrats. Great feeling, isn't it?


 If I had to take a guess, I'd have to say in general bisexuals are accepted more because there isn't a negative stereotype surrounding them.
The only real difference going against them compared to the rest of glbt is being roped in as gay by people that don't understand the difference and bisexual erasure.
So bisexual-
+no stereotype
-some people don't understand the difference
-/+bisexual erasure


dinosaurdammit said:


> STOP THAT >:C
> NO MORE INB4 POST EVER NO MATTER THE CONTEXT >>::CC- actually refer to my avi for the true expression.


 This thread combined bisexuality and christianity, the impending shitfest is a given.
I bet you fifty dollars within 3 pages someone is going to go, "I don't understand why bisexuals/gays bother with religion".


----------



## Mentova (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Gratz, I (drunkenly) came out last weekend. It felt good. :3


----------



## Isen (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Coming out can be really cathartic.  Good job. :3  It can be weird finally feeling like it's a "real world thing".

Tangential: I really really hate it when people are obviously texting each other when they're in a room with a bunch of people.  At least, I hate it when it happens to me.  There was some drama between me and a few people in my circle of friends and one of them wouldn't stop sending us super emotional texts when we were all hanging out.  Holy shit.


----------



## Mr. Brightside (Jun 23, 2011)

William said:


> Tl;dr it went badly.


 Sorry to hear that.  I wish it would've gone better for you.  
Also, no offense, but your experience is a prime example of why I'll never come out to my parents.  That would be a best-case scenario for me.


----------



## Tomias_Redford (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



Heckler & Koch said:


> Gratz, I (drunkenly) came out last weekend. It felt good. :3



I knew you were gay, even before you came out.

*hipster glasses*


----------



## William (Jun 23, 2011)

SecretlyAFK said:


> Sorry to hear that.  I wish it would've gone better for you.
> Also, no offense, but your experience is a prime example of why I'll never come out to my parents.  That would be a best-case scenario for me.


 
I'm the kind of person who has to tell them everything or else I feel like I'm hiding something (from my mom, at least). It's not great, but at least they know and don't reject or loathe me for it. 

On the bright side, my great aunt is the most supportive person in the world about it. When I came out to her she hugged me and said that she'd support me no matter what. She's like 56 years old and the sweetest woman ever. It always makes me happy when older adults don't think of you badly.


----------



## Bando (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

Huge congrats! It can be a really tough decision, not to mention stressful to work up the courage to actually send the text.

I came out to my friend the same way pretty much, and it feels great. :3


----------



## Itakirie (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

I knew it. I could tell by your voice on the voice thread. :V

But seriously, congratulations. I'm proud of you. c:
Also...church people? Please tell me if any of the others happen to find out that they're open minded about these things...


----------



## Larry (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



Aden said:


> I did an experiment a few years ago and found that it was a lot easier to come out as bi to people than just "gay". It's like they get offended if you don't find their sex sexually attractive (or don't share their attraction for the opposite sex).
> 
> Also congrats. Great feeling, isn't it?


"LOL So yeah, I'm gay, but I also like girls, too. So don't think you're barking up the wrong tree, I just think you're ugly."

And yeah, it felt good finally telling someone about how I feel. I really don't do that at all to anyone, but it's great having someone who'll listen and care for you. :3


Heckler & Koch said:


> Gratz, I (drunkenly) came out last weekend. It felt good. :3


"drunkenly"? Did you even remember the whole scene? lol


Itakirie said:


> I knew it. I could tell by your voice on the voice thread. :V


Hey, any straight man can sound like a flamboyant model. :V
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5938965 (You be the judge)


> But seriously, congratulations. I'm proud of you. c:
> Also...church people? Please tell me if any of the others happen to find out that they're open minded about these things...


Well, I'm only gonna say this through my experience:
There are Christians who don't think God hates gays, and that God is an accepting God. Now the Christian friends that I know aren't exactlly the average type of Christian (they're hipsters, so...), and they _rarely_ talk about "JESUS LOVES ME" 24/7, but yeah, some of my friends AFAIK are open-minded.

Now, since I actually found confindence in myself, I'm gonna tell a few more people that I know they'll be cool with me. I'm not gonna rush it, and do it all I once in a text, but I would like to come out in person at least one time. 

The funny part is, I'm only telling some of my female friends. Doesn't it seem easier to come out to a girl, or is it that just me? Maybe it's the femininity that comforts me...


----------



## Thatch (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*

A guy coming out to a girl about being BI strikes me as hilariously redundant.



larry669 said:


> *I FINALLY CAME ON SOMEONE.*


 
:V


----------



## moonchylde (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



CannonFodder said:


> I bet you fifty dollars within 3 pages someone is going to go, "I don't understand why bisexuals/gays bother with religion".



Shit, there goes my contribution. I guess I'll have to take it to my own rant thread. :V


----------



## Browder (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



larry669 said:


> So now, I am officially bisexual, leaning on gay. I really don't know if I should've posted this in the Coming Out thread, but this was a remarkable moment in my life for me, so I'm kinda raving about this. I hope you don't mind. :3


 Yes you should have.

But congratulations. Next stop, parents.


----------



## Larry (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



Browder said:


> Yes you should have.
> 
> But congratulations. Next stop, *parents*.



LOL Fuck no. They're not exactly "gay friendly", so I don't think I'll ever come out to them. >.>


----------



## Browder (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



larry669 said:


> LOL Fuck no. They're not exactly "gay friendly", so I don't think I'll ever come out to them. >.>


 If I can come out to my fervent deep-south baptist grandma as bi, you can come out to your parents.

Parents, Larry. Make it happen. :V


----------



## Larry (Jun 23, 2011)

*Re: Rave: Larry Finally Comes Out*



Browder said:


> If I can come out to my fervent deep-south baptist grandma as bi, you can come out to your parents.
> 
> Parents, Larry. Make it happen. :V



Dang, deep-south? You sir, have balls of steel.

And I've been freaking out for the past 10 seconds because I pressed the refresh button and I ended up somewhere else. I didn't realize you moved the thread, so that was kinda weird. XP


----------



## Ekho (Jun 23, 2011)

Congrats, Larry!  I wish I wasn't such a pansy and could actually tell someone >_<


----------



## Larry (Jun 23, 2011)

Ekho said:


> Congrats, Larry! I wish I wasn't such a pansy and could actually tell someone >_<



You can tell me. :3


----------



## ArgonTheFox (Jun 24, 2011)

Just came out to my mum. she just sat there in silence for what felt like 10 years then she was just like "oh your still growing up, your horemoans are all over the place, you will change as you get older, you never know you might find a girl you really like."

I might try again when ive "stopped growing" then see if she will listen.


----------



## Spatel (Jun 24, 2011)

So I just came out as 3 different letters to my parents this morning.

trans
bi
genderqueer

They're very shellshocked. I told them I did not want to pursue SRS, that I was 6'3" and could never pass as a woman. I told them that I was dissatisfied with the options available for transsexuals in my position, and I had become exceedingly depressed and unable to motivate myself to move my life forward academically or career-wise because of it. I suspect there will be a long conversation when they have time this evening.

I plan to just identify as genderqueer publicly and leave it at that. If I manage to make a long-term heterosexual relationship work, then I'll probably stick with that. If I never do in the next few years, then we'll probably change the conversation.


----------



## SnowFox (Jun 24, 2011)

ArgonTheFox said:


> your horemoans are all over the place


 
I hate it when that happens.


----------



## Bliss (Jun 24, 2011)

Spatel said:


> I told them I did not want to pursue SRS, that I was 6'3" and could never pass as a woman.


You could pass as a supermodel.


----------



## Spatel (Jun 24, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> You could pass as a supermodel.


 I have a great face for it. Other than the height there would be no problems. I have no ambitions to join the WNBA though. Hate basketball.


----------



## Bliss (Jun 24, 2011)

Spatel said:


> I have a great face for it. Other than the height there would be no problems. I have no ambitions to join the WNBA though. Hate basketball.


When I was little we passed this woman at a mall. She was most likely over two metres tall (6'7?) and - now when I think about it later - probably a transwoman. Sure, she got looks from people... but they all whispered: "Wow! That was a tall _lady_!"

Not to mention with what confidence she carried herself. She even gave me a big smile. :grin:


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Jun 25, 2011)

Well I have reached a decision, Im going to tell a friend of mine named Rob within a week, why? Because out of all of the friends I have, Coolguy Rob is probably one of the few who would still stay friends with me even though I like men.


----------



## Larry (Jun 25, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Well I have reached a decision, Im going to tell a friend of mine named Rob within a week, why? Because out of all of the friends I have, Coolguy Rob is probably one of the few who would still stay friends with me even though I like men.


 
Glad you found someone to tell.

Make sure you tell us how it went down. :3


----------



## Browder (Jun 25, 2011)

larry669 said:


> Glad you found someone to tell.
> 
> Make sure you tell us how it went down. :3


 Oh hey you're here, which reminds me:

Larrry. Parents. MAKE IT HAPPEN.


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Jun 25, 2011)

larry669 said:


> Glad you found someone to tell.
> 
> Make sure you tell us how it went down. :3


 
And if it dosn't go well, Ill send you pictures of buttered toast.


----------



## Larry (Jun 25, 2011)

Browder said:


> Oh hey you're here, which reminds me:
> 
> Larrry. Parents. MAKE IT HAPPEN.


SHUT UP, YOU'RE NOT MY DAD!! >:V  


Grey Wolverine said:


> And if it dosn't go well, Ill send you pictures of buttered toast.


 Thanks. :3c


----------



## Mr. Brightside (Jun 25, 2011)

larry669 said:


> SHUT UP, YOU'RE NOT MY DAD!! >:V


 Yeah, because your dad doesn't know yet!  GO MAKE IT HAPPEN.


----------



## Spatel (Jun 25, 2011)

Guys, don't bully people to out themselves. It can end terribly. There is a time and a place, and they'll know when that time and place is. Even parents that seem progressive can do a 180 when their own flesh and blood gets involved.

~case in point~

my dear mother thinks transsexuality is a choice. she's a lifelong democrat

there's no way to anticipate personal hangups


----------



## Browder (Jun 25, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Guys, don't bully people to out themselves. It can end terribly. There is a time and a place, and they'll know when that time and place is. Even parents that seem progressive can do a 180 when their own flesh and blood gets involved.
> 
> ~case in point~
> 
> ...


Yeah I know. I'm just having fun teasing him.


----------



## Bliss (Jun 25, 2011)

Spatel said:


> ~case in point~
> 
> my dear mother thinks transsexuality is a choice. she's a lifelong democrat
> 
> there's no way to anticipate personal hangups


Pff...

Education imminent?


----------



## Mr. Brightside (Jun 25, 2011)

Whell, I came out to a friend today.  He didn't care all that much.  It didn't feel like much changed, but then again, that is a good thing.


----------



## shaaaark (Jun 27, 2011)

.


----------



## Scotty1700 (Jun 28, 2011)

Just told my friend I was bi (yeah it's cheating as that's only half true) but at least it's a start. Feels good.


----------



## Lemoncholic (Jun 28, 2011)

Scotty1700 said:


> Just told my friend I was bi (yeah it's cheating as that's only half true) but at least it's a start. Feels good.


 
I'm glad you've told somebody, any plans to tell anybody else any time soon?


----------



## Scotty1700 (Jun 28, 2011)

Lemoncholic said:


> I'm glad you've told somebody, any plans to tell anybody else any time soon?


 
Meh, it's on my facebook wall. I'm sure at least a few others know by now.


----------



## Icen (Jun 29, 2011)

Throwing out the "IF YOU NEED A SHOULDER TO LEAN ON, YOU CAN TALK TO ME" card.


----------



## Grey Wolverine (Jun 29, 2011)

Well I told my friend Rob last night, and he basically said "hey man, I'm here for you if you need it." So things went well, Sorry Larry, no toast.


----------



## Mr. Brightside (Jun 29, 2011)

Grey Wolverine said:


> Well I told my friend Rob last night, and he basically said "hey man, I'm here for you if you need it." So things went well, Sorry Larry, no toast.


 Nice.  Can I have the toast? :3


----------



## kaithewolf (Jun 30, 2011)

Ok so im pretty sure that im bi but but don't want to come out unless I know for sure but how do I find out if I don't come out can any help


----------



## Cain (Jul 2, 2011)

kaithewolf said:


> Ok so im pretty sure that im bi but but don't want to come out unless I know for sure but how do I find out if I don't come out can any help


 
How do you find out if you're bi? 
Have a relationship with a man & woman (But not at the same time >.>) Then have sex with a man & woman (Again, not at the same time). If you feel extremely uncomfortable doing either one of these things, or even thinking about it, you're either Straight, or gay.

You don't need to 'come out' to know if you're straight or gay.


----------



## Darkwing (Jul 2, 2011)

Oh god, well, last night I had a talk with a very close friend from Jersey, and, well, me and him are now boyfriends =3 

But how do I explain all of this to my parents now? I was thinking of just surprising them on our first date but my friends are telling me that's a bad idea. (Is it a bad idea?) I find it way too awkward now to be sitting them down and explaining all this shit.


----------



## Cain (Jul 2, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Oh god, well, last night I had a talk with a very close friend from Jersey, and, well, me and him are now boyfriends =3
> 
> But how do I explain all of this to my parents now? I was thinking of just surprising them on our first date but my friends are telling me that's a bad idea. (Is it a bad idea?) I find it way too awkward now to be sitting them down and explaining all this shit.


 
Find out their opinion on gays, subtly of course.


----------



## Darkwing (Jul 2, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Find out their opinion on gays, subtly of course.


 
Well I already know how they feel about gays, I dunno how things will turn out once they find out. 

My mom is absolutely homophobic, but she loves me a lot and she told me that she would accept me no matter what, dunno how much she means it when she says that. 

My dad just doesn't care about gays, he's kinda on the fence about the whole thing. I think it's better to talk to him first about it because my mom is a nervous wreak all the time and I think it would get very ugly telling her myself.


----------



## Cain (Jul 2, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Well I already know how they feel about gays, I dunno how things will turn out once they find out.
> 
> My mom is absolutely homophobic, but she loves me a lot and she told me that she would accept me no matter what, dunno how much she means it when she says that.
> 
> My dad just doesn't care about gays, he's kinda on the fence about the whole thing. I think it's better to talk to him first about it because my mom is a nervous wreak all the time and I think it would get very ugly telling her myself.


 
That would be a good route of approach. Good luck!


----------



## Conker (Jul 2, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Well I already know how they feel about gays, I dunno how things will turn out once they find out.
> 
> My mom is absolutely homophobic, but she loves me a lot and she told me that she would accept me no matter what, dunno how much she means it when she says that.
> 
> My dad just doesn't care about gays, he's kinda on the fence about the whole thing. I think it's better to talk to him first about it because my mom is a nervous wreak all the time and I think it would get very ugly telling her myself.


I don't know your current living situation, but it might be wise to just hold off on telling them for awhile yet. I've read enough horror stories about people coming out to their parents to know erring on the side of caution is never a bad thing.


----------



## Darkwing (Jul 2, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> That would be a good route of approach. Good luck!


 
Thanks dude! 

But yeah, I think I might keep it a secret, I really don't know, either way I'm fucked and not in the good way. Even though my dad's on the fence about it, I bet he would be very shocked knowing his own flesh and blood is gay with a boyfriend. 

It's very confusing, but at least I have a lot of time to think because my boyfriend's going on vacation for two weeks and we are going to have our first date the weekend after =3


----------



## Bliss (Jul 2, 2011)

Conker said:


> I don't know your current living situation, but it might be wise to just hold off on telling them for awhile yet. I've read enough horror stories about people coming out to their parents to know erring on the side of caution is never a bad thing.


No other way to change things than an individual being brave and taking the first step.

If you want the world to know, you got to let it show.


----------



## Conker (Jul 2, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> No other way to change things than an individual being brave and taking the first step.
> 
> If you want the world to know, you got to let it show.


 True, but since people have been kicked out of their homes for coming out, it's usually best to wait if you aren't sure how your parents will take it. He even said he's unsure about how much his mom will freak out, and that his dad is on the fence. If he's pretty well dependent upon both of his parents right now, then he shouldn't try and fuck that up. 

Being brave and being smart don't need to be opposites.


----------



## Bliss (Jul 2, 2011)

Conker said:


> True, but since people have been kicked out of their homes for coming out, it's usually best to wait if you aren't sure how your parents will take it. He even said he's unsure about how much his mom will freak out, and that his dad is on the fence. If he's pretty well dependent upon both of his parents right now, then he shouldn't try and fuck that up.


There's a different between 'freaking out' because something is new / scary and going all "no son of mine is a faggot, leave this house".

Only known medicine for the former is to let them endure the truth.


----------



## Dubbleyew (Jul 9, 2011)

hoooo boy

There was quite a long time I identified as bisexual, I think since I was around 16 or so. I've more recently started identifying as pansexual because I feel that fits what I actually am a bit better. 

Because, nowadays, when I start to develop a crush on somebody, it's their level of understanding and intelligence that causes it to happen, and I simply just don't take their sex or gender identity into account. I also could fall for someone who fell outside the gender binary (genderqueer/genderfluid people, etc) as well since again, gender just isn't one of the things that clicks for me when I start to like someone. I just don't care what your biology is or what you identify as. If I like you then I like you, simple as that.

I told my parents I'm bi because I doubt they'd understand what pansexuality is, nor take me seriously if I explained it to them. It was just easier to tell them I'm bi. Theyâ€¦donâ€™t seem to care? I don't know, they never really like to talk about it. But when I talk about LGBT rights, my mom is always asking me "ARE YOU GAY?" even though I already told her my sexuality before. It gets a little annoying. I'm grateful, though, that my parents donâ€™t seem to be as homophobic as they once were. I think me being so into LGBT rights has softened them up a little, as well as them meeting the lesbian couple who have a child that is friends with my aunt. When it comes to the more radical homophobes, you canâ€™t usually change their minds no matter what you do, but people who are more on the fence sometimes just need to see an LGBT headed family or know a gay person and theyâ€™ll start lending support. 

People can surprise you.

I -think- my parents know I'm an atheist too, I think that bothers them more than my sexuality does. At the very least, they know I'm not a fan of religious stuff.

I later on in life came to the realization that I'm transgender or at least genderfluid, which was a lot harder for me to admit to myself than being pansexual. I actually started crying a bit when I realized it (don't tell anyone >.>) and while I'm openly pansexual in all aspects of life, I have yet to identify as male the majority of the time outside of the internet. It's just something I'm not sure most of my family will understand, so I'm quite apprehensive about it. If I do come out as trans/genderfluid IRL, it will be long after I've moved out of this house so I can live my life identifying however I please. It helps that I had a breast reduction surgery, maybe someday I can experiment with binding or something.

I know it sounds hypocritical because I just said above that people can surprise you. But being trans is often regarded worse in society than being gay/bi/pan is, so I really don't know yet. Maybe I'll tell them someday, but not yet.

For now, though, the internet provides a good outlet for letting me identify as primarily male. Second life is especially useful for this. I love it. My gender identity not matching my biological sex is the reason I tend to avoid using voice chat on skype or on games unless I'm comfortable with the people hearing it (or to free up my hands when gaming)

Welp I think that's pretty much it.


----------



## Spatel (Jul 15, 2011)

some day when they can transplant brains maybe the MtFs and FtMs can team up and swap with each other


----------



## Antonin Scalia (Jul 19, 2011)

This thread is kinda depressing.  When I came out it was pretty awkward with the parents, but they said "eh, that's cool," and moved on.  Even at school people were relatively unfazed by it,  something I found to be a little weird (live in Missouri so go figure).  My high school had a GSA club so had a pretty sweet deal going, even though neither of the people I went out with were in it.  I've heard horror stories though.


----------



## Obtuse tail (Jul 31, 2011)

I remember, when my grandmother was taking me and my uncle to school, (my uncle is adopted and 2 years older than me) they were discussing whether the guy crossing the street in front of them was gay or not based on the way he walks.
My dad and i knows it's not a choice, but she thinks it is.
oh, baptists...
On the other hand, my whole family is Mormon, and i haven't seen a single Mormon against homosexuality...


----------



## Kranda (Aug 1, 2011)

My parents would probably tell me that i'm just going through a phase if I told them about being bisexual. It's lucky for me that my best friend happens to be gay. He's like the most proactive person too. Our school has never had any type of LGBT anything, period. All by himself he petitioned the principal and gathered teachers to help coordinate a GSA and this coming school year he's going to be in charge of it.


----------



## Stawks (Aug 1, 2011)

Kranda said:


> My parents would probably tell me that i'm just going through a phase if I told them about being bisexual. It's lucky for me that my best friend happens to be gay. He's like the most proactive person too. Our school has never had any type of LGBT anything, period. All by himself he petitioned the principal and gathered teachers to help coordinate a GSA and this coming school year he's going to be in charge of it.



I'm so sick of Gay Straight Alliances.

I say we round up all the straights, make them dance for our amusement, hear the lamentations of their women! etc

viva la vida loca yknow


----------



## Kranda (Aug 1, 2011)

The thing is this GSA actually will have straight members or at least I think they are.


----------



## Sundown (Aug 2, 2011)

My mom found out because she's a nosy b***ch and she was cyber-stalking me. Of course, she assumed I was a lesbian (at the time I identified as Bi) and proceeded with the usual crap. Thankfully after trying to scare the crud out of me she pretty much decided that she didn't take me seriously.

Ironically, these days I identify as biromantic, so technically I won't be breaking any of her precious religious laws because I won't be 'lying' with anybody. XD


----------



## Milo (Aug 3, 2011)

last person I came out to was by my mother. one of my mother's friend's I've known since I was a kid. then one day in a car ride, my mother and her friend talking, then all of a sudden "his dad kicked him out because he was gay" and then I started screaming inside my head :U


----------



## AmaterasuDen (Aug 4, 2011)

God, here we go.

Since i was 12 years old i felt attracted to either girls or boys, but i didn't dare to tell anyone about this, so i kept my mouth shut, years passed by and i felt so shitty about not telling anyone.
When i turned 15 i couldn't handle it anymore, i had to tell someone, so i got to my best friend, and told him i was bisexual, he said it was no problem and seconds later we were.... kissing.
We didn't talk to each other for like 2 months because we were embarrassed about the kiss, but its time for me to stand up and face it.

I'm 17 right now, and i will be turning 18 on the 14th of august, i am going to tell my parents about my bisexuality on my birthday, i hope it goes alright, and that they will understand.

I am Bisexual, here, i said it!


----------



## Bliss (Aug 4, 2011)

AmaterasuDen said:


> i got to my best friend, and told him i was bisexual, he said it was no problem and seconds later we were.... kissing.


... Wow. 

Talk about coming out.


----------



## Larry (Aug 4, 2011)

AmaterasuDen said:


> When i turned 15 i couldn't handle it anymore, i had to tell someone, so i got to my best friend, and told him i was bisexual, he said it was no problem and seconds later we were.... kissing.



My god, this is the cutest thing I've heard today~


----------



## AmaterasuDen (Aug 5, 2011)

Just so its clear, he was the one who started.  Not that i cared. x3

But recently there have been some shitty activity here at home, so i really don't think i should tell them already, or do you guys got any tips how to tell them? (them = dad/bro/friends)


----------



## Stawks (Aug 5, 2011)

AmaterasuDen said:


> Just so its clear, he was the one who started.  Not that i cared. x3
> 
> But recently there have been some shitty activity here at home, so i really don't think i should tell them already, or do you guys got any tips how to tell them? (them = dad/bro/friends)



Well, depends, really... How shitty? While coming out is an important thing and y'know, brave and all that, it can also be kinda stupid. If you're going to get kicked out, or have a significantly strained relationship with your parents because of it, it's probably best to keep it a secret for now. Unless you're moving out soon? Once you move out, fuck em.

Anyway if you do want to get out with it my advice is to just be casual about it. The whole bit where you sit down and have a serious conversation about it is very played out. It's the 21st century, it's their job to understand your lifestyle, not your job to explain it. Just go out and be your own dude and if you come back home with a boy one day, they'll deal with it.


----------



## AmaterasuDen (Aug 5, 2011)

The shitty situations have been cleared up faster than i aspected x3

To be clear, i still only got my dad, don't really wanna talk about my mom.
Sadly enough my bro is a homophobic, he REALLY hates on them, so I am pretty scared for him.
My dad always said, i will love you no mater what, so i don't think he will kick me out or something.
So my plan was telling my dad first, and than my dad tells my bro so that he can protect me against him.

But i just have to get the balls to do that, hehe x3


----------



## Stawks (Aug 6, 2011)

AmaterasuDen said:


> The shitty situations have been cleared up faster than i aspected x3
> 
> To be clear, i still only got my dad, don't really wanna talk about my mom.
> Sadly enough my bro is a homophobic, he REALLY hates on them, so I am pretty scared for him.
> ...



Haha well that's good. If you feel safe doing it than you should. :3

You can also tell him not to tell your brother, I'm sure he'll understand that.


----------



## iTails (Aug 6, 2011)

AmaterasuDen said:


> The shitty situations have been cleared up faster than i aspected x3
> 
> To be clear, i still only got my dad, don't really wanna talk about my mom.
> Sadly enough my bro is a homophobic, he REALLY hates on them, so I am pretty scared for him.
> ...


The best place to do this is in a public area so that they won't kick the shit out of you without having CPS called on them.


----------



## Darkwing (Aug 6, 2011)

I fucked up big time. I dunno if my life is going to hell now because I just dropped the fucking bomb. 

Well anyways, my boyfriend wanted me to come out to my friend on chat. Me and him were playfully hinting at him of our relationship, and at the end of the night, before I left my boyfriend brought me back onto chat, and told me to explain our relationship to him because he was curious about us. 

I told him straightforward, "Me and him and boyfriend/boyfriend" nothing else. He then went off, saying "You're a bunch of wierdos/sickos" "I can't talk to you right now" "I feel uncomfortable around you guys now" and then he logged off on us. 

FUNNY FUCKING THING IS, this is the same friend, who, a few months ago I came out to and he said he and his parents were perfectly fine with gays. 

Guys, did I fuck up? What do I do? I'm scared.


----------



## Bliss (Aug 6, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> FUNNY FUCKING THING IS, this is the same friend, who, a few months ago I came out to and he said he and his parents were perfectly fine with gays.


Maybe he's jealous because he couldn't get you. :]



> Guys, did I fuck up? What do I do? I'm scared.


Wait until he gets used to the idea.


----------



## Darkwing (Aug 6, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> Maybe he's jealous because he couldn't get you. :]



That's what me and my boyfriend thought. Because I SWEAR he tried hitting on my boyfriend a couple times >.> I didn't listen to his response to me telling him on voice chat because I was so scared I didn't want to hear his response, but he sounded kinda pissed from what I've heard. Maybe he WAS jealous < 

Anyways I sent him a message on facebook to clear things up a bit, and I might make an attempt later tomorrow to talk to him about it.


----------



## Milo (Aug 13, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Maybe he WAS jealous



dude, even I'M not that bad, and I'm an angsty lonely fuck who envy's all life who has someone to love. :U


----------



## Darkwing (Aug 13, 2011)

Milo said:


> dude, even I'M not that bad, and I'm an angsty lonely fuck who envy's all life who has someone to love. :U



Well, I still don't know if he was <:I 

He asked me though why I thought he was gay... I thought he was but I only told my boyfriend, unless I slipped something on voice chat I dunno.


----------



## Lobar (Aug 13, 2011)

Obtuse tail said:


> On the other hand, my whole family is Mormon, and i haven't seen a single Mormon against homosexuality...



 Prop 8 likely only passed because of Mormons.  They ramped up tithing so they could spend about $20 million on campaigning for it, plus they sent busloads of volunteers from Utah down to California to help out.

(All blatantly unconstitutional, by the way, but no one dared to intervene)


----------



## Alex-L (Aug 22, 2011)

After 7 rather turbulent years in my life, I finally learned to accept myself last month. Came out to my friends on facebook, my parents on the phone, and my brother in person. Gotta say, I honestly expected him to beat the crap out of me. He's been very verbal on the subject in the past. Seeing the expression on his face was totally worth it though. They were all able to accept that I was gay right off the bat, so...yeah. Everything went better than expected.

Used to pretend I was the "If they ask, I'll tell them" type...but I'd just end up lying straight to their face. Didn't wanna make a big deal out of it, but I had to get it off my chest.


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## Obtuse tail (Aug 22, 2011)

Lobar said:


> Prop 8 likely only passed because of Mormons.  They ramped up tithing so they could spend about $20 million on campaigning for it, plus they sent busloads of volunteers from Utah down to California to help out.
> 
> (All blatantly unconstitutional, by the way, but no one dared to intervene)


Wow...
I had no idea. My dad asked what i thought about proposition 8 and i would ramble on about how against it i was. I compared it to racism and such.
He said that they could still go into a marriage-like relationship. and all the prop. was doing was changing the title.
he didn't state his opinion though, but every once in a while he asks me if ive seen any pretty girls at school, and when i said no, he would ask me if id seen any cute guys.
I seriously don't know.


----------



## SnowyD (Aug 23, 2011)

Well, when I came out I was 17 I think? I can't remember, but anyways I had a boyfriend at the time and I just felt it was necessary to come out to my mom. I had already been out to my friends and stuff. When I told her she cried, but not sad tears, happy tears! Then I cried, and we cried.


The odd part is back then I felt that I was gay, but now I feel more bi than anything. So whenever I bring ladies to meet my parents my mom gets slightly confused, so I had to come out twice. Which wasn't really a draw back but a correct to my teenage misconceptions.

Anyways, all is well.


----------



## James L. Wolf (Aug 30, 2011)

I've been out of the closet for 3 years now, after dening it for so long, I finally, just accepted it. When i came out to my father, he made my life hell though, my bro, mother, sister didnt care, but they didnt live with us. Thus my father and step mother made life hell for me. They challenged me at every corner, mind f*cked me everyday. Blamed me for everything, and hated me.Then they moved to a small hick town in GA, where I was bullied constantly, and made to feel as if I was nothing. When I heard about the LGBT teens that killed themselves, I cried, cause i felt as they did and I felt like i was on the path. Then I got a call from my mum one day. She asked if I was gay, I told her, she offered me a place to live, and rebuild, which I am in the process of doing. But I hate my father, as he challenge me, and he called every furry a  pervert and pedofile, to this day I try to clear the fandoms name, cause he caused some heavy damage to it, emailing people he knew the troll site , and shit. He had and has no remorse for anything he did. To this day we fight, and I win constantly, he's dead to me. But Im glad to be rebuilding my life, even though its a bit tough and im even a bit afraid. But Im working past it!


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## Lunar (Aug 30, 2011)

I was pretty cool with accepting myself.  I didn't know for the longest time, and often found myself in situations where that information would be useful.  Once I realized exactly what attracted me, I was like, "oh, okay, I guess that's alright."  (Don't worry, it's not anything bad; policewomen and drill instructors can't be the worst thing ever.)


----------



## Scotty1700 (Aug 30, 2011)

Stiiiiill closeted, for some reason I don't feel it's necessary to come out and tell my parents but I assume they already know.


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## Larry (Aug 30, 2011)

Scotty1700 said:


> Stiiiiill closeted, for some reason I don't feel it's necessary to come out and tell my parents but I assume they already know.



Some of my friends already knew that I was gay before I told them. ._.


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## Alderic (Aug 31, 2011)

I'm bi but leading towards men,I came out to my family when I was 13. People learn to accept,my dad especially. My mom and stepdad are homophobic but i don't let it get to me. I enjoy what i enjoy and they have no right to disturb that. I came out by telling my parents and told them i was interested in a boy. Now at highschool,I even sit on my crushs lap at lunch and he holds me around the waist and such ^w^ people get use to it. You can't let people get to you.

@James L Wolf 
I honestly understand what you're going through. My step-dad is an extremely homophobic person,as is my cousin(whom i spend alot of time with. I have told him i'm bi but he's okay with me now.) I get bullied for things of this nature but I've never been hurt for it. (then again,I'm a pretty strong guy so i don't think they'd want to test me;not to be cocky of course  ) 
I hope you the best wishes,that you can build up your life and find a nice guy ^w^ <3


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## Kryn (Sep 1, 2011)

Alderic said:


> Now at highschool,I even sit on my crushs lap at lunch and he holds me around the waist and such



Where the hell do you live? At my HS the teachers would probably let the other kids take both of you outside to beat your ass. Granted I graduated 5 years ago but I doubt much has changed.


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## James L. Wolf (Sep 1, 2011)

Kryn said:


> Where the hell do you live? At my HS the teachers would probably let the other kids take both of you outside to beat your ass. Granted I graduated 5 years ago but I doubt much has changed.



Dude at my high school you can kiss and sit on each others laps, and txt in the middle of class, they dont care, just as long as you show em your not listening!


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## Conker (Sep 2, 2011)

Do you guys think it's necessary to "come out" as an asexual? I personally don't, but my ex thinks I should (I gave the dating game a try). She makes a bigger deal about it than I do though, probably because she uses it as an excuse for why I broke up with her instead of the obvious: she's a pants on head crazy annoying semibitch. It's bothering me though.

There's also my best friend who wants to get me laid sooooooooooo badly, but he's let up on that a bit lately. Still annoying when he's all "WE SHOULD GO BARHOPPIN AND MEET SOME LADIES!"


----------



## Browder (Sep 2, 2011)

Conker said:


> Do you guys think it's necessary to "come out" as an asexual? I personally don't, but my ex thinks I should (I gave the dating game a try). She makes a bigger deal about it than I do though, probably because she uses it as an excuse for why I broke up with her instead of the obvious: she's a pants on head crazy annoying semibitch. It's bothering me though.
> 
> There's also my best friend who wants to get me laid sooooooooooo badly, but he's let up on that a bit lately. Still annoying when he's all "WE SHOULD GO BARHOPPIN AND MEET SOME LADIES!"



Well if you want him to stop then you should tell him your preference. Then again he may not believe it actually exists. :/

And no. Coming out is only necessary from an activist point of view. If you come out, you do so for Asexual Awareness and rarely for yourself.


----------



## Milo (Sep 2, 2011)

Kryn said:


> Where the hell do you live? At my HS the teachers would probably let the other kids take both of you outside to beat your ass. Granted I graduated 5 years ago but I doubt much has changed.



that's actually EXACTLY what happened to me. except it wasn't my boyfriend, and I was just messing around with a friend. I sat on his lap for like, 3 seconds, then this bitch freaks out and goes NO NO, U NO DO THAT HERE; when on the other side of the wall in my lunchroom, there's always these straight couples jamming their tongues down eachothers throat :U


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## Alderic (Sep 2, 2011)

Kryn said:


> Where the hell do you live? At my HS the teachers would probably let the other kids take both of you outside to beat your ass. Granted I graduated 5 years ago but I doubt much has changed.


I live on the east coast,granted there is many homophobes where i live. I don't care though. We are who we are. They did stop us once but they dont every time. idk they're weird.
@MILO
Yeah..people are homophobes.. It makes me sick :\


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## Kryn (Sep 2, 2011)

I guess you're just braver than me. I live on the east coast, but in the south (shit) part of Virginia. I've came out to the in-laws that my sister married into and none of them gave a shit about it, but I'm still terrified of telling new people I meet in this town.


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## Bliss (Sep 2, 2011)

Kryn said:


> I'm still terrified of telling new people I meet in this town.


Wear something more gay and that's not a problem. :V


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## Kryn (Sep 2, 2011)

My wardrobe needs a fabulous update for sure


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## Bliss (Sep 2, 2011)

Kryn said:


> My wardrobe needs a fabulous update for sure


You go, girl! 

Come out so future fags don't have to.


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## Aetius (Sep 2, 2011)

I don't really see anything bad with staying in the closet, I really don't see the need to tell people I know about my sexuality.


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## Bliss (Sep 2, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> I don't really see anything bad with staying in the closet, I really don't see the need to tell people I know about my sexuality.


You and your 'roommate'. :V


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## Aetius (Sep 2, 2011)

Lizzie said:


> You and your 'roommate'. :V



No doubt he knows now, maybe because I "accidentally" leave questionable things on my desktop. 

Well... that's one off the list!


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## Milo (Sep 2, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> I don't really see anything bad with staying in the closet, I really don't see the need to tell people I know about my sexuality.



it's the difference between a shallow friendship, and homelessness... both suck, but I'd rather have a friend who doesn't know I'm gay, than no friend and no home... :U


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Sep 3, 2011)

I'm in the beginnings of a long-distance relationship with a fellow FAFer, and I often find myself thinking about it a lot. It's also quite obvious to my family that I am thinking about things, and they always pipe up and ask "what's on your mind?" I tell them nothing, and it kinda hurts. They once told me that they'd still love me if I were gay (back on my birthday) but I just cannot bring myself to believe them. They seem so confident in the knowledge that I'm straight, anyway. Hell, it's almost as if they're trying to make me NOT gay, by pointing out pretty girls and joking about other gays seen on the street, etc. Stop doing that, family. It's a pain. 

It also makes me wonder what my SO feels, I worry about him. It just sucks too much having to live a lie. It sucks for me and others, so naturally it does for him. It's a struggle for me and others, so him, too. I can't wait until I can finally stop doing so, and be honest with everyone around me. I'm sure that like other people and I, he feels the same. Mesad.

/vent


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## Cain (Sep 3, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> No doubt he knows now, maybe because I "accidentally" leave questionable things on my desktop.
> 
> Well... that's one off the list!


Pfft. That's nothing. When my roomie asked me for a backpack that he could use when he went to ComiCon, I directed him to one full of dildos. Whoops.


----------



## Aetius (Sep 3, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Pfft. That's nothing. When my roomie asked me for a backpack that he could use when he went to ComiCon, I directed him to one full of dildos. Whoops.


I wish I could have seen his expression soon after lol


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 3, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I'm in the beginnings of a long-distance relationship with a fellow FAFer, and I often find myself thinking about it a lot. It's also quite obvious to my family that I am thinking about things, and they always pipe up and ask "what's on your mind?" I tell them nothing, and it kinda hurts. They once told me that they'd still love me if I were gay (back on my birthday) but I just cannot bring myself to believe them. They seem so confident in the knowledge that I'm straight, anyway. Hell, it's almost as if they're trying to make me NOT gay, by pointing out pretty girls and joking about other gays seen on the street, etc. Stop doing that, family. It's a pain.
> 
> It also makes me wonder what my SO feels, I worry about him. It just sucks too much having to live a lie. It sucks for me and others, so naturally it does for him. It's a struggle for me and others, so him, too. I can't wait until I can finally stop doing so, and be honest with everyone around me. I'm sure that like other people and I, he feels the same. Mesad.
> 
> /vent



I'm in the same spot as you Gibs, I can relate to that X.X

I've been in a LDR with my boyfriend for 2 months now, me and him have already been through a LOT with our parents, because occasionally, some words slipped out about our relationship and causes a HUGE shitstorm in the family and stuff x.x I already know my mom does not approve of gays or of my relationship.

 It breaks me so much that I am something my mom heavily disapproves of. It feels like I'm living a big lie, and sometimes things get so nervous and tense with my family that I get little mini-panic attacks thinking about how much I'm hiding from my family, and what the consequences may be if word gets out of who I really am. 

It's hard, just really hard. Gibs, at least you know your family approves of your sexuality, my family does not, and it's making me a big, nervous wreak hiding my whole life from them.


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## Cain (Sep 3, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> I wish I could have seen his expression soon after lol


Wasn't as bad as the time he found my baddragon stuff when looking for my spare room key.


----------



## Bliss (Sep 3, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Wasn't as bad as the time he found my baddragon stuff when looking for my spare room key.


How old are you again? D:


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## Milo (Sep 3, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> baddragon stuff



it was a dolphin wasn't it :3


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## Cain (Sep 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> it was a dolphin wasn't it :3


Pfft, Aquatics.

Murr.


----------



## Milo (Sep 3, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Pfft, Aquatics.
> 
> Murr.



us cetaceans have that effect on people. don't fight it :>


----------



## Aetius (Sep 3, 2011)

You people sicken me.

murr bad dragon....


----------



## Kryn (Sep 3, 2011)

Milo said:


> us cetaceans have that effect on people. don't fight it :>



I have a seadragon, he honestly doesn't see much use lol


----------



## Milo (Sep 4, 2011)

Kryn said:


> I have a seadragon, he honestly doesn't see much use lol



psh. you probably just can't handle it :c


----------



## Cain (Sep 4, 2011)

Kryn said:


> I have a seadragon, he honestly doesn't see much use lol


Your Gryphon persona seems to think otherwise ;3c


----------



## Kryn (Sep 4, 2011)

Milo said:


> psh. you probably just can't handle it :c


 
It's too big  My anus hasn't reached bottomless pit status yet.


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## Cain (Sep 4, 2011)

Does all this still classify under 'Coming out'? xD


----------



## Aetius (Sep 4, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Does all this still classify under 'Coming out'? xD



No.


----------



## Schwimmwagen (Sep 4, 2011)

What the hell am I reading.


----------



## Conker (Sep 4, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Does all this still classify under 'Coming out'? xD


No, it's more "pulling out" :V


----------



## Cain (Sep 4, 2011)

Gibby said:


> What the hell am I reading.


Penis. And varying forms of animal genitalia.



Conker said:


> No, it's more "pulling out" :V


Oicwutudidthere.

Touche.


----------



## Flarei (Sep 11, 2011)

(Deleted)


----------



## Perception (Sep 11, 2011)

Wow, i cant believe there is 85 pages of people comming out. Lol, im new to this but when i read up on the wikipedia page they said that the gay community is only slightly higher than normal, ive never seen so many in one place (not that theres anything wrong with that). Back on topic, luckily ive never needed to do this, cause im straight =P


----------



## Spatel (Sep 11, 2011)

Fellepe said:


> I like browsing Bad Dragon myself...
> 
> ANYWHOM..
> 
> I am having an issue with openly saying I'm bisexual, not because it is embarasing, but because there have been.. Projectiles.. Cast at 3100 miles per hour at bisexual people here before. Another issue is the fact everyone here is very much so relegious. Whilst my relegion allows homo and bisexuality, we only account for 1% of the population. I've assumed by now my freinds know I am bi, mainly because my ass is apparently "really tight".. And I can't help but be a bit fruity now and then. So basicly my issue is: gun toatin' hillbillies, and my bible slinging parents.



It's more than 1% of the population. Those are just 'out' bisexuals. Clearly most spend their entire lives in the closet. That's what the 'down-low' and the 'SMSM' communities are, basically. They present themselves as straight while keeping all the same-sex stuff under the table.

I suspect the religious conservatives that think homosexuality is a choice are probably closet bi as well... it would explain why it seems like a choice for them.


----------



## Flarei (Sep 11, 2011)

No no, you don't quite understand. I, and three other represent our relegion. That is 1%. The relegious of Christiantiy consider I, and my other three members, shunned. It is rather funny as well. But anywhom, my issue is my insane mother and stepfather. Not exactly the general population.


----------



## Spatel (Sep 11, 2011)

I'm confused what you're saying. Are you saying Christianity is rare in your country, or that among those that you know, your sexuality is rare?


----------



## Flarei (Sep 11, 2011)

(deleted)


----------



## Konalxis (Sep 13, 2011)

I came out last year, and it feels good to have it off my chest now. Still searching for a dang partner still. Who knew it'd be this hard to find someone to relate to? :S


----------



## Cain (Sep 13, 2011)

Fellepe said:


> Rewind: *makes VCR noises*
> 
> I am from Arkansas. I am one of two known bisexuals in town. Everyone but three freinds and I are Christian. My freinds and I are Hectorists. (A relegion we formed.) I am trying to tell my Christoan parents I am bi without getting hung by the town posse.
> 
> ...



Try working on yer spelling.
And you -formed- a religion? Isn't that technically considered a cult?


----------



## Aetius (Sep 13, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> And you -formed- a religion? Isn't that technically considered a cult?



There is nothing wrong with cults, I think cults should have a right to drink the blood of virgins to become one with the asteroids.


----------



## Cain (Sep 13, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> There is nothing wrong with cults, I think cults should have a right to drink the blood of virgins to become one with the asteroids.


As well as worship the mighty Cthulhu.


----------



## Aetius (Sep 13, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> As well as worship the mighty Cthulhu.



Pfffft, Cthulhu is sooo 19th century.

Cosmic crap is where its at.


----------



## Flarei (Sep 14, 2011)

Jagged Edge said:


> Try working on yer spelling.
> And you -formed- a religion? Isn't that technically considered a cult?



My spelling is horrid, I know, no need to point it out. And no, around here a cult is something centered around yourself. We are a relegion. A very leanient one at that. Pretty much it is a code of laws that explains the freedoms and rights of all Fauna.


----------



## Lucifer_Regal (Sep 20, 2011)

Is "coming out" really such a big deal in America?
I live in Wales and I and several friends "came out" as gay/bi at 14. Some parents got slightly freaked out but bullying seems to be more rare here. Only one person I know has been bullied for their sexuality :S


----------



## Scotty1700 (Sep 20, 2011)

Lucifer_Regal said:


> Is "coming out" really such a big deal in America?
> I live in Wales and I and several friends "came out" as gay/bi at 14. Some parents got slightly freaked out but bullying seems to be more rare here. Only one person I know has been bullied for their sexuality :S



If you're in the south, coming out is huge cause you have the risk of getting fucking murdered by crazy bible-toting rednecks. If you're anywhere else in the US you'll just get ridiculed and harassed :v Thus it's easier to just not tell anyone.

*Probably not right at all but in all honesty it's not taken as lightly as other places.


----------



## Larry (Sep 20, 2011)

Scotty1700 said:


> If you're in the south, coming out is huge cause you have the risk of getting fucking murdered by crazy bible-toting rednecks. If you're anywhere else in the US you'll just get ridiculed and harassed :v Thus it's easier to just not tell anyone.
> 
> *Probably not right at all but in all honesty it's not taken as lightly as other places.



Basically, coming out to deep-rooted Tennessean parents is suicide. Just write a note before you tell them while you're at it?


----------



## Lucifer_Regal (Sep 20, 2011)

Scotty1700 said:


> If you're in the south, coming out is huge cause you have the risk of getting fucking murdered by crazy bible-toting rednecks. If you're anywhere else in the US you'll just get ridiculed and harassed :v Thus it's easier to just not tell anyone.
> 
> *Probably not right at all but in all honesty it's not taken as lightly as other places.



Jeez. I can't even imagine what that's like. I guess I'm lucky?
Slightly extremely off topic, but what do you do for TV out there? I'd be hard pressed to name ONE British TV presenter who isn't gay or at least camp :/


----------



## Bliss (Sep 20, 2011)

Lucifer_Regal said:


> Slightly extremely off topic, but what do you do for TV out there? I'd be hard pressed to name ONE British TV presenter who isn't gay or at least camp :/


Bill O'Reilly.


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 20, 2011)

Scotty1700 said:


> If you're in the south, coming out is huge cause you have the risk of getting fucking murdered by crazy bible-toting rednecks. If you're anywhere else in the US you'll just get ridiculed and harassed :v Thus it's easier to just not tell anyone.
> 
> *Probably not right at all but in all honesty it's not taken as lightly as other places.



I don't think coming out is THAT bad in the south <=S Probably in the deep rural areas that are full of crazies lol.


----------



## wolfman18 (Sep 24, 2011)

*sigh*  I still have to come out  
Not lookin forward to it terribly, but whatever, it'll work out.


----------



## Spatel (Sep 24, 2011)

talking to your parents about your boyfriend is much harder than the initial coming out, at least if one of them has hangups


----------



## Darkwing (Sep 24, 2011)

Spatel said:


> talking to your parents about your boyfriend is much harder than the initial coming out, at least if one of them has hangups



Haha, yeah I'd imagine. 

I'm still in the closet and I have a boyfriend. GAAAAH, coming out is gonna be a BITCH X.X Especially since they are probably gonna find out themselves before I even tell them. 

I think my parents are a tad homophobic, too <=I


----------



## Kryn (Sep 25, 2011)

I sorta don't feel any reason to come out to my parents while I'm single. I mean my sex life isn't their business anyway, and if I was dating a guy I actually liked enough to introduce to them that seems like the most obvious time to bring it up.


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## Saiko (Sep 25, 2011)

Well after reading all 130 pages of this thread I guess it's only fair that I at least try to contribute to the discussion. First, though, I have to thank Discord Nova for linking this on page 76. Honestly, that article was actually an answer to a prayer of mine that I've been looking out for for a while, now. For years I've noticed that there really is no argument against homosexuality even though the Bible supposedly condemns it. I wondered if perhaps it was a misinterpretation or even an incorrect translation, and that article actually pointed out AND defended both of these possibilities well.

I myself am bi, and looking back I can see that developing somewhere around when I was 13 or so. However, I didn't really think about my orientation (or relationships in general for that matter) until early May this year (I was 16 then, 17 now). I finally concluded that I am bi a little more than a month ago when I noticed that a longstanding "straight" online friend and I had developed feelings for each other. That was also the time we became long-distance boyfriends. ^_^

After reading this thread, I've decided to come out my closest friend, Allen, when I find an appropriate time. I know he won't mind because I won't be the first bi friend he knows. We actually kinda idolize the other bi guy we know. It doesn't have much to do with him being bi, but the fact that he is known to be bi and is still considered awesome around us is important. There's also the fact that Allen once told me that he suspects our other friend of being bi and hasn't treated him any differently. You may wonder why I feel the need to tell him. My reason is that is the fact that my friends are some of the gayest straight(?) guys I know, and I feel guilty every time they "no-homo" something when I myself am in a gay relationship. They are comfortable with the "gayness" because they're all comfortable in the knowledge that we're all straight, which they don't realize is not entirely true...

However, despite having a boyfriend (which many bi's here have stated as a criteria for coming out to their parents), I am NOT coming out to mine anytime soon. I live smack in the middle of Mississippi, and my parents are both from a small rural town in Louisiana. Just driving to school, I pass by at least seven churches (I probably forgot a couple, so there may be more). In the car, my mom has already told me that she'd kill me if I was gay. I know she was strongly exaggerating (which she does a lot), and it's very unlikely she'd throw me out; but I still get the message. She would NOT approve at all, and I doubt I'd be able to change her mind. The scary thing is that I'm more comfortable telling my mom... I'm more afraid of what my dad would do considering he has never voiced much of an opinion on the matter. You may think this means he may not care, but his dad (my grandfather) regularly rants about LGBT's and how they're some kind of abomination. I don't think my dad feels quite that strongly about the matter, but I don't think the apple fell too far from the tree.

At the very least, I'm not going to come out to my parents until I am entirely independent of them. Thankfully, though, this will be easier for me than others, because I qualify for a LOT of scholarship money. I may actually be paid just to attend, which means I don't rely on parents for my education or future. At the moment, though, it's not worth the risk even though I'd have several places to go if I did get kicked out.



Hehe, sorry about the wall. Despite my attempts to summarize, this still ended up being longer than I intended. xD


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## Schwimmwagen (Sep 25, 2011)

I'm starting to think I should finally do it sooner or later...


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## Aetius (Sep 25, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I'm starting to think I should finally do it sooner or later...



Same here, each time I decide that I should I just get scared and not do anything.


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## Schwimmwagen (Sep 25, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> Same here, each time I decide that I should I just get scared and not do anything.



Yeah, man. On my birthday, my parents were actually talking about the idea of it and how they'd still love me anyway, despite the amount of anti-gay jokes they make. It's really hard to decide if they're actually being honest there or they're just saying it so I instead believe that they're better parents than I think they are, and it doesn't matter because I'm not gay after all. RIGHT? Bleigh.


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## Aetius (Sep 25, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Yeah, man. On my birthday, my parents were actually talking about the idea of it and how they'd still love me anyway, despite the amount of anti-gay jokes they make. It's really hard to decide if they're actually being honest there or they're just saying it so I instead believe that they're better parents than I think they are, and it doesn't matter because I'm not gay after all. RIGHT? Bleigh.



Ugh that's a tough one, my parents wouldn't really bring up that idea, they would just be very confrontational about it and ask me if I was D:. 
I think I might as well just play it safe and maybe tell them after I graduate and land myself with a stable job.


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## Bliss (Sep 25, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I'm starting to think I should finally do it sooner or later...





Crusader Mike said:


> Same here, each time I decide that I should I just get scared and not do anything.


Aww, you two... take all the time you need. :3c



Crusader Mike said:


> a stable job.


Ahaha.


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## Saiko (Sep 25, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Yeah, man. On my birthday, my parents were actually talking about the idea of it and how they'd still love me anyway, despite the amount of anti-gay jokes they make. It's really hard to decide if they're actually being honest there or they're just saying it so I instead believe that they're better parents than I think they are, and it doesn't matter because I'm not gay after all. RIGHT? Bleigh.



No offense, but it kinda sounds like you're being a little bit paranoid to me. :/

That'd be a horrible thing for parents to do, luring you out specifically for the purpose of stabbing you in the back. That doesn't sound like something they'd do to you, does it? I personally can't imagine anyone's parents, no matter how homophobic, being THAT cruel; but you know your own parents better than I do. >.>


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## Bliss (Sep 25, 2011)

Saiko said:


> That'd be a horrible thing for parents to do, luring you out specifically for the purpose of stabbing you in the back. That doesn't sound like something they'd do to you, does it? I personally can't imagine anyone's parents, no matter how homophobic, being THAT cruel; but you know your own parents better than I do. >.>


Parents are born to be cruel. Homophobic or not.


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## kyle19 (Sep 25, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> Same here, each time I decide that I should I just get scared and not do anything.



Basically this, Ive decided on telling my mother, but mixed signals and getting scared seem to prevent me from doing so.


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## greg-the-fox (Sep 25, 2011)

Lucifer_Regal said:


> Jeez. I can't even imagine what that's like. I guess I'm lucky?
> Slightly extremely off topic, but what do you do for TV out there? I'd be hard pressed to name ONE British TV presenter who isn't gay or at least camp :/



All British people sound somewhat gay to us Americans :V


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## Spatel (Sep 25, 2011)

Crusader Mike said:


> ...maybe tell them after I graduate and land myself with a *stable job*.


whatever you say mr hands



			
				greg-the-fox said:
			
		

> All British people sound somewhat gay to us Americans :V


Eh, I think all celebrities act a bit more flamboyant, on our side of the pond as well. I don't think Brits sound any gayer than Americans. Now the french sound very gay though. I'm not saying this as a stereotypical gun-toting frenchy-hating redneck American. I have endless respect for the french. I like their politics, and I think they're pretty cool, especially when they riot. I also love house. But I can't help it... the language... it really does use a lot of intonations that are considered flamboyant when an english-speaker uses them.

They really can't help it. Conversely, German is an incredibly asexual language, and Russian, Italian, and Portuguese are just sexy languages in general.


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## Lucifer_Regal (Sep 26, 2011)

greg-the-fox said:


> All British people sound somewhat gay to us Americans :V



All British people ARE somewhat gay compared to Americans :L


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## Schwimmwagen (Sep 27, 2011)

Saiko said:


> No offense, but it kinda sounds like you're being a little bit paranoid to me. :/
> 
> That'd be a horrible thing for parents to do, luring you out specifically for the purpose of stabbing you in the back. That doesn't sound like something they'd do to you, does it? I personally can't imagine anyone's parents, no matter how homophobic, being THAT cruel; but you know your own parents better than I do. >.>


 
Knowing them, they're very likely to do so. See, my parents pretty much just try to _buy_ my affections rather than act like they really do give a shit about me. In the case of gayness, my parents are very, very certain that I'm straight, at least they act like it, so knowing them, they're just saying that they'd "love" me still if I was gay, but they're so comfortable in the knowledge that I'm not, so while I get that short-term little boost in faith, it won't bite them in the ass later on because I won't be coming out. Hell, they're cracking homophobic jokes and making homophobic statements all the time. What does that tell you?



Lucifer_Regal said:


> All British people ARE somewhat gay compared to Americans :L



More like homophobia isn't as widespread and fierce like in the US. That's what all the anti-gay horror stories from the US tell me, anyway.


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## Spatel (Sep 27, 2011)

Next year, my state will be voting on a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage, as well as civil unions and domestic partnerships. Even though most people here oppose the amendment, our legislature set the voting date on the same day as the Republican primary, knowing that Republican turnout would already be much higher than other demographics that day.

Assholes. It's the most restrictive amendment of any state, too. Straight couples that want to seek legal recognition of domestic partnerships or civil unions are tough out of luck. I know someone who's in one currently, and he'd lose his legal ability to visit his girlfriend, who is *FEMALE* and has *TITS, AND A VAGINA* if she's unconscious in the hospital and needs consent forms signed.

In NC, people who are registered as independent can vote in any party's primary, so maybe we could get all the independents voting that day to nominate a presidential candidate they would hate, just to troll them.


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## Schwimmwagen (Oct 14, 2011)

Hm.

I am *seriously* considering talking to my mum about it tommorow. I'm getting very very tired of hiding, soo...

Wish me luck! ._.'


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## Darkwing (Oct 14, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Hm.
> 
> I am *seriously* considering talking to my mum about it tommorow. I'm getting very very tired of hiding, soo...
> 
> Wish me luck! ._.'



Good luck Gibster! We're all here to support you and help =3 If you need any advice you can PM me or something.


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## Bliss (Oct 14, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Hm.
> 
> I am *seriously* considering talking to my mum about it tommorow. I'm getting very very tired of hiding, soo...
> 
> Wish me luck! ._.'


If you need to seek an asylum afterwards, just tell me. :V

Good luck.


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## Evan of Phrygia (Oct 14, 2011)

I went forth and admitted that i was considering being bisexual.

I didn't actually say that I was, and i think mom's just going to jump the gun and assume I'm too young to make that decision, as well as assume it's too late to come out

What

Now we're going to have to remotely talk. Again.
We've been having meaningful and shitty discussions every-fucking-day
Screw everything, I'm closeting to them till college, this just doesn't seem worth it


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## Darkwing (Oct 14, 2011)

This is Tides said:


> I went forth and admitted that i was considering being bisexual.
> 
> I didn't actually say that I was, and i think mom's just going to jump the gun and assume I'm too young to make that decision, as well as assume it's too late to come out
> 
> ...



That sucks. 

Yeeeeah it's a shame that most parents today don't understand LGBT =C 

My parents definitely don't, they kinda got a very good hint that I was, absolute shitstorm ensued, I am still a bit traumatized from that incident x.x


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## Bliss (Oct 14, 2011)

Darkwing said:


> Yeeeeah it's a shame that most parents today don't understand LGBT =C


Even more parents yesterday didn't understand GLBT. :V


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## Schwimmwagen (Oct 15, 2011)

I did it. 

Success. ;u;

Edit: Told my sis, too. Went down a lot easier and quicker.  

Now for the big challenge - my dad. .___.

Edit 2: 

Done.

My dad _really_ wasn't happy to hear it, but he's gonna work to accept it. ._. His opinion of me hasn't changed as he said, but eh. Anyway, knowing him, the fact I'm gay is gonna be a source of jokes for him down the road.


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## Spatel (Oct 15, 2011)

Congrats Gibby! Sounds like your dad will get better.


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## Azure (Oct 15, 2011)

I've been out so long, I think I went back in :c


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## ~secret~ (Oct 15, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I did it.
> 
> Success. ;u;
> 
> ...



Hey lad, jokes be better than hatred. Call this one a success and get ready for the 'does it hurt sitting down' jokes.


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## eorpheus (Oct 16, 2011)

Hi folks--I don't really post here at all (ever), but I figured I would share this here and see if anybody had any advice or insight.  I've been struggling with my sexuality for a long time now, and have only recently begun to come out.  Unfortunately, I'm not really sure what I'm coming out as, or if I'm even right.

I wrote a huge long journal entry about it--I figure it will make more sense to just link that here.  That way, you can also see things I mention about my gallery and favorites and stuff, which will give you a better idea of where I'm coming from:

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/2417558/

Thanks!


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## Evan of Phrygia (Oct 17, 2011)

My mom found out i was seeing someone. I didn't tell her about the kissing/sex because she would have gone berserk, i just told her it was purely emotional and lacked any physical intentions (opposite of the truth). She is now bringing it up errywhere :c. She at least now accepts that i may become bisexual. I think i'll just eventually have a "revelation" and tell her that i am bi. As per usual, the male parent may not handle it as well. I find it ironic that my mother, the conservative Christian, is of all things, the more accepting one.


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## Darkwing (Oct 18, 2011)

This is Tides said:


> My mom found out i was seeing someone. I didn't tell her about the kissing/sex because she would have gone berserk, i just told her it was purely emotional and lacked any physical intentions (opposite of the truth). She is now bringing it up errywhere :c. She at least now accepts that i may become bisexual. I think i'll just eventually have a "revelation" and tell her that i am bi. As per usual, the male parent may not handle it as well. I find it ironic that my mother, the conservative Christian, is of all things, the more accepting one.



Oooooh :C 

Well at least she was somewhat accepting about it. Congrats on sorta coming out x3 

I can't come out to my parents unfortunately, they don't seem to tolerate LGBT at all =/ I have a friend who will let me stay at his place for a while though if they do find out.


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## Schwimmwagen (Oct 18, 2011)

Whelp.
I really wish I kept my big mouth shut now.


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## Bliss (Oct 18, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Whelp.
> I really wish I kept my big mouth shut now.


What, why? D:


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## Milo (Oct 18, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Whelp.
> I really wish I kept my big mouth shut now.



uh oh, what happened :I


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## Schwimmwagen (Oct 18, 2011)

Well ever since I made that celebratory FA journal after coming out, there has not been a single evening so far without a fierce fight, damaged possessions, or tears. I'll leave it at that.


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## Spatel (Oct 20, 2011)

This is Tides said:


> As per usual, the male parent may not handle it as well. I find it ironic that my mother, the conservative Christian, is of all things, the more accepting one.



Is this usual? My dad's the good one, keeping in line with his progressive, secular humanist views. My mother is trying her best to improve but she still clearly has many hangups.


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## Evan of Phrygia (Oct 20, 2011)

Spatel said:


> Is this usual? My dad's the good one, keeping in line with his progressive, secular humanist views. My mother is trying her best to improve but she still clearly has many hangups.


In my family was my intention of speaking.

Even though mom talks about it more, which i hate, my dad usually takes a perspective that counters the possibility of acceptance.

For instance, when i admitted to them i had some sort of anxiety, his first suggestion was to either eat, or that i was lying to him about something. Well, he just went forward and said i had been a liar. Since i didn't imeediately tell them, he told me off for it.


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## Distorted (Nov 9, 2011)

Kinda wished I had waited on coming out. I was home from college at the time when my mom asked me if I was interested in someone. At first I was gonna say a girl's name, but it felt bad and I just came out with it and said I liked a guy. She was calm at first, but the next day she had a bit of an episode. She kept asking questions and I was trying my best to stand by what I felt was true. My mother can be frightening at times. What's worse is that she told my dad. He was calm at first, but then he had his episode and it made me realize that I had made a mistake telling them. 

They refuse to believe that I'm gay. My mother keeps talking about the woman I'm gonna marry and the kids that were gonna have. It gets really annoying. Since then I've came out to my brother and a few friends, and its been ok. My brother took it a little hard, but he still treats me the same. We don't really talk about it, but it's understood with my brother and friends. 

I want to move out of my house as soon as possible. I just got a job, so I'm gonna save up and start looking around for an apartment. I know I can't be myself at home, or else I risk my old man going crazy again. I'm really lucky he doesn't drink a lot, or else I probably wouldn't be typing this right now.


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## Night-san (Dec 1, 2011)

I'm closeted to the majority of people, including my family. My close friend's have been aware of my bisexuality for two or three years now, though. I don't plan on telling my family until I'm out of college and I'm living on my own, if I ever tell them, and even then only if I have a long term relationship with a girl.


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## Arkeus (Dec 4, 2011)

Hey Gibby,Try not to let it get to you. some of us are lucky enough to have parents who are understanding, but sometimes we dont. I know none of us can feel your pain, but try to stay strong. you can always talk to any of us on here is should imagine. If you can, try to ignore any comments that spark it all up. it may/may not be your whole life, its just your sexuality. I am struggling to tell those i care about , but the key is to give it all time. We are here for you if you ever need us, all of us. And if you ever want to talk with someone, my skype -----> mountain_wolf_16


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## Schwimmwagen (Dec 4, 2011)

Arkeus said:


> Hey Gibby,Try not to let it get to you. some of us are lucky enough to have parents who are understanding, but sometimes we dont. I know none of us can feel your pain, but try to stay strong. you can always talk to any of us on here is should imagine. If you can, try to ignore any comments that spark it all up. it may/may not be your whole life, its just your sexuality. I am struggling to tell those i care about , but the key is to give it all time. We are here for you if you ever need us, all of us. And if you ever want to talk with someone, im here most of the day: mountain_wolf_16



Thanks, but I don't even know who you are.

Anyway, my own little update. My family don't even believe me when I say I'm gay anymore. :/ They seem to be in denial of the whole idea. It's one thing when they accept it or hate me for it, but when they pretend it doesn't exist... That hurts, in some kind of strange, horrid way. ._.


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## Arkeus (Dec 4, 2011)

When they are in denial sometimes you just need to live with that, at least for now..... Dont bring it up too much if it causes stress between you and your family, otherwise they will come to asscociate, even if they shouldnt, you being gay with their stress.  hope this helps...


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## Schwimmwagen (Dec 4, 2011)

Arkeus said:


> When they are in denial sometimes you just need to live with that, at least for now..... Dont bring it up too much if it causes stress between you and your family, otherwise they will come to asscociate, even if they shouldnt, you being gay with their stress.  hope this helps...



Yeah, I don't bring it up because it's pointless to do so.


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## Saiko (Dec 4, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Anyway, my own little update. My family don't even believe me when I say I'm gay anymore. :/ They seem to be in denial of the whole idea. It's one thing when they accept it or hate me for it, but when they pretend it doesn't exist... That hurts, in some kind of strange, horrid way. ._.


This all may kinda seem obvious, but I think it still helps to have it all written out plainly.

I think there are two things you can do, the goal being to get them to come out of denial. You can either basically throw it in their face and do something to make it impossible for them to deny it, or you can let them come to gradually. The former would solve the problem quickly, but it more likely will result in them hating you for it or at least getting upset to some degree. You say this would be an improvement over them pretending it doesn't exist, and this indeed would more quickly relieve some of that particular kind of pain; but it'd still likely replace it with another kind.

Letting them come to will be harder. It'll take longer, and during that time you'll still have to endure the pain of them ignoring it - possibly just for them to end up still hating it anyway. However, I think it has a better chance of them accepting, or at least tolerating, it.

Although this sounds rather harsh and unhelpful, I'd just endure for now. Don't force anything on them. Let it sit for a few weeks, maybe a few months - however long it takes to let tensions drop some. Perhaps after that, talk to them one-on-one if you can get a chance. I think you said you were more comfortable with your mom, so start with her. Calmly sit down with her and talk to her about her concerns. Listen to her talk about her; keep the topic away from yourself if you can. See if you can find any common ground. Perhaps you both can't stand flamers. If so, see if you can use that to get your foot in the door. If you need to, it may not hurt to exaggerate your opinion on that common ground. Perhaps flamers annoy you a little, but they piss her off. Exaggerate how much they annoy you, so she doesn't feel too alienated.

One way to look at it is to basically "try again." Try to come out again, just... a bit differently. This time may work better.


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## Schwimmwagen (Dec 4, 2011)

If I took the former option, it'd cause a shitstorm. I didn't say that this denial is worse, but it's just, eh, different. I think I would have preferred it in a different way. In fact, it was my mother who dismissed it all and refuses to talk about it.

Ah well, fuck 'em. I don't need their approval. However, the fact that something is missing will probably stick with me. They're my goddamn PARENTS after all.


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## Saiko (Dec 4, 2011)

It reminds me of a couple months ago when my mom and I passed by some mild flamers at a restaurant, and she said, "Gay is bad. Well, _that_ gay is bad." I noticed that she basically implied that there's another "kind" of gay that she's okay with and asked her about it a few days later. Unfortunately, I didn't quite get the answer I expected. Instead of her simply not liking flamers, she thinks flamers are the only "real" gays, and she doesn't like them. She thinks that people who identify as gay but aren't flamers are simply going through a phase and aren't really gay. Sooooo, considering she groups bi's with gays, she basically said she wouldn't believe me if I told her. ._.

Again, if you're going to try to get them on your side to any degree, you're right to leave it alone; and you may be right in not getting they're approval. It may be better to just leave it as is. But still, there will be something missing that you'll only get if you try to talk to one of them.


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## Bloodshot_Eyes (Dec 5, 2011)

My immediate family knows I'm transgendered now... 
Mom's the only person that thinks I'm not making it up for attention... >_>
So yeah, there's that.


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## pikayoshigirl (Dec 6, 2011)

I came out as bisexual to a lot of friends recently, but it wasn't that much of a big deal, because lots of my friends are in the LGBT category. Few of my friends are 100% straight.

I only lost one 'friend' when I told him about me wanting to date a girl. He refused to accept me for who I was and said that I was disgusting. He's actually afraid of me right now.  It's a shame, because he could've been a nice guy if he wasn't such a homophobe.


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## Criminal Scum (Dec 7, 2011)

'Even though I'm apathetic about my sexuality, for some reason ever since I realized I also like dudes, I've had this stupid urge to come out to someone. It's not some stupid sentiment about not wanting to lie to my friends and family; I lie all the time.


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## Evan of Phrygia (Dec 9, 2011)

Just came out to my mom; I am officially no longer a closet bisexual! The conversation went AMAZINGLY, and she completely bashed my ex. Even though i don't hate him, it was still pretty much the coolest thing ever. I love my mom x3


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## JC~Jox (Dec 18, 2011)

I like the closet... it's nice and cozy in here.


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## Delta Fox (Dec 18, 2011)

I told my parents I was Asexual, and it failed to generate much response.


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## Furries (Dec 18, 2011)

Okay internet and everyone around me... I'm going to come out....
*Saying this outloud irl* Mom.... dad..... everyone on the internet..... It's going to be hard telling you this but..... I am... a..... heterosexual.....


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## The_Mask (Dec 19, 2011)

Right-o, I have a bit of a dilemma here. I'm bi (like 4 on kinsey, maybe more, we'll see) and I haven't told anyone before. Currently I'm at a point where I fell I need to tell somebody or I'll go crazy. Now logically my mind tells me that it isn't necessary to tell anybody but that certainly isn't how I feel. Quite a confusing mental state. Anyways, I'm going down to my parents house for Christmas tomorrow and I'm worried I may blurt something out about it, and Christmas isn't exactly a good time for that. I plan on telling an old friend tomorrow, but I don't know how long I can sit in my parents' house without cracking. My parents are about as stereotypically American as you can get. They work, eat dinner, and watch TV like clockwork, and my dad constantly listens political garbage being spewed out of AM talk radio. Also relevant: I live in Texas; there's literally a church around every corner.
Now then, does anybody have advice on how not to ruin Christmas so to speak, and how is the news of someone being bi usually taken? (listen, I only got through 5 pages of this forum so far so don't bother with the "this has already been said" bit)


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## Saiko (Dec 19, 2011)

The_Mask said:


> Right-o, I have a bit of a dilemma here. I'm bi (like 4 on kinsey, maybe more, we'll see) and I haven't told anyone before. Currently I'm at a point where I fell I need to tell somebody or I'll go crazy. Now logically my mind tells me that it isn't necessary to tell anybody but that certainly isn't how I feel. Quite a confusing mental state. Anyways, I'm going down to my parents house for Christmas tomorrow and I'm worried I may blurt something out about it, and Christmas isn't exactly a good time for that. I plan on telling an old friend tomorrow, but I don't know how long I can sit in my parents' house without cracking. My parents are about as stereotypically American as you can get. They work, eat dinner, and watch TV like clockwork, and my dad constantly listens political garbage being spewed out of AM talk radio. Also relevant: I live in Texas; there's literally a church around every corner.
> Now then, does anybody have advice on how not to ruin Christmas so to speak, and how is the news of someone being bi usually taken? (listen, I only got through 5 pages of this forum so far so don't bother with the "this has already been said" bit)


It's taken differently depending on your parents. Some don't care what you are. Some don't care as long as "you aren't gay." Mine are among those who bunch the two together and would get mad at me for either. Really, no one here can help you much with that because we don't know your family.

As for how to not let it slip, I can only speculate. Being a very logical person in general, I think I know how you feel. You REALLY want to tell someone, but you know that it isn't necessary right now; and you're not sure how it'll be taken. Perhaps what may help is setting a few conditions for telling them, such as "at least after my next birthday" and "only if I have a boyfriend that I am truly considering marrying." This way you can decide when you come out and find solace in the knowledge that you will come out if it matters.



Furries said:


> Okay internet and everyone around me... I'm going to come out....
> *Saying this outloud irl* Mom.... dad..... everyone on the internet..... It's going to be hard telling you this but..... I am... a..... heterosexual.....


Umm, you do realize that there have been a couple people in this thread who were *attacked by their families* for coming out right? This is actually one of those few threads where it's not cool to joke about it imo. 

I'm not saying you can't say anything because you're straight, but there's a reason we say you don't have to come out as a furry - because coming out as bi/gay can and has had some serious consequences for a lot of people.


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## The_Mask (Dec 19, 2011)

Saiko said:


> It's taken differently depending on your parents. Some don't care what you are. Some don't care as long as "you aren't gay." Mine are among those who bunch the two together and would get mad at me for either. Really, no one here can help you much with that because we don't know your family.



Believe me if I could've provided more info I would've. You would think that after having lived with two people for 18 years you would learn their opinions on that sort of thing. But nope, I keep finding out time and time again I know absolutely nothing about my parents.



Saiko said:


> As for how to not let it slip, I can only speculate. Being a very logical person in general, I think I know how you feel. You REALLY want to tell someone, but you know that it isn't necessary right now; and you're not sure how it'll be taken. Perhaps what may help is setting a few conditions for telling them, such as "at least after my next birthday" and "only if I have a boyfriend that I am truly considering marrying." This way you can decide when you come out and find solace in the knowledge that you will come out if it matters.



Considering my student loan gets sent to my parents before me, maybe after I get the money would be wisest. They constantly ask what's wrong though whenever I'm sitting still thinking, and I can't/don't lie. If they ask what's wrong and this happens to be on my mind I'll probably end up telling them. Perhaps I can manage to do some poking around on their opinions on the topic. Any thoughts on how to go about that?


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## Saiko (Dec 19, 2011)

The_Mask said:


> Considering my student loan gets sent to my parents before me, maybe after I get the money would be wisest. They constantly ask what's wrong though whenever I'm sitting still thinking, and I can't/don't lie. If they ask what's wrong and this happens to be on my mind I'll probably end up telling them. Perhaps I can manage to do some poking around on their opinions on the topic. Any thoughts on how to go about that?


Well, I myself got lucky. One of my shorter posts higher up on this page explains that to an extent. I just let my mom voice her opinion, then later asked her to elaborate on one particular thing she said. I don't know if you'll be so lucky though, considering it seems you don't live with her anymore. My guess would be to try to set up something. Perhaps while you're visiting you could get them to watch a movie with gay's in it, and see how they react? Something along those lines?

Hmm, just thought of something that might work too, if you're willing to stretch the truth a bit (okay maybe make something up). You could tell your mom that one of your best friends just recently came out to you, but you're not sure how to take it. Ask her for her opinion on the topic.


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## The_Mask (Dec 20, 2011)

Saiko said:


> Well, I myself got lucky. One of my shorter posts higher up on this page explains that to an extent. I just let my mom voice her opinion, then later asked her to elaborate on one particular thing she said. I don't know if you'll be so lucky though, considering it seems you don't live with her anymore. My guess would be to try to set up something. Perhaps while you're visiting you could get them to watch a movie with gay's in it, and see how they react? Something along those lines?



Doubt I'd find anything like that in their video library, which has like 150 DVDs in it. While most people have said it helps to have moved out (I assume cause you can run if need be XD), It seems to also be a bit of a problem cause there's no way left to probe...nargh



Saiko said:


> Hmm, just thought of something that might work too, if you're willing to stretch the truth a bit (okay maybe make something up). You could tell your mom that one of your best friends just recently came out to you, but you're not sure how to take it. Ask her for her opinion on the topic.



Oh they'd see right through that one I'm sure. But thanks for the suggestion, maybe I can manipulate that a bit.

And I clicked every single one of the spoiler buttons in your signature Saiko. Perseverance!


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## Lobar (Dec 20, 2011)

The_Mask said:


> Right-o, I have a bit of a dilemma here. I'm bi (like 4 on kinsey, maybe more, we'll see) and I haven't told anyone before. Currently I'm at a point where I fell I need to tell somebody or I'll go crazy. Now logically my mind tells me that it isn't necessary to tell anybody but that certainly isn't how I feel. Quite a confusing mental state. Anyways, I'm going down to my parents house for Christmas tomorrow and I'm worried I may blurt something out about it, and Christmas isn't exactly a good time for that. I plan on telling an old friend tomorrow, but I don't know how long I can sit in my parents' house without cracking. My parents are about as stereotypically American as you can get. They work, eat dinner, and watch TV like clockwork, and my dad constantly listens political garbage being spewed out of AM talk radio. Also relevant: I live in Texas; there's literally a church around every corner.
> Now then, does anybody have advice on how not to ruin Christmas so to speak, and how is the news of someone being bi usually taken? (listen, I only got through 5 pages of this forum so far so don't bother with the "this has already been said" bit)



I always advise people not to come out unless they're ready to handle the consequences of the worst case scenario.  Assuming you're a college student on your parents' dime, this means losing your tuition and a place to live, and possibly all the friends that could help you out.  Being openly gay while homeless in Texas might even hurt your ability to receive charity from a religious institutions such as the Salvation Army.

I hate telling people to stay in the closet, but this is the reality of the world we live in today, especially in Texas and the South.  Even parents that seemingly act tolerant of gays can do a complete 180 when it comes to their own flesh and blood.  Confide in your old friend if you absolutely must, but you risk him outing you further if you misjudge his feelings on the subject and ability to keep a secret.


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## The_Mask (Dec 20, 2011)

Lobar said:


> I always advise people not to come out unless they're ready to handle the consequences of the worst case scenario.  Assuming you're a college student on your parents' dime, this means losing your tuition and a place to live, and possibly all the friends that could help you out.  Being openly gay while homeless in Texas might even hurt your ability to receive charity from a religious institutions such as the Salvation Army.
> 
> I hate telling people to stay in the closet, but this is the reality of the world we live in today, especially in Texas and the South.  Even parents that seemingly act tolerant of gays can do a complete 180 when it comes to their own flesh and blood.  Confide in your old friend if you absolutely must, but you risk him outing you further if you misjudge his feelings on the subject and ability to keep a secret.



Oi. Ok, thanks for that. I think I may have found an opportunity in March. I would have already received the money by then.


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## Riq (Dec 26, 2011)

Waited until around the beginning of college to start letting people know so I kind of dropped it in on conversations. Between my friends the reaction was generally positive. Worst case scenario was a little bit of a shocked reaction and then they're cool with it, so I was in a pretty good mood.

So I ended up telling my dad two days ago and apparently that was one of his worst fears and he seems to think that me being gay is like some horrible thing happened to me. I still haven't gotten any explanation regarding what the issue is specifically. He also wants me to look into changing, and to help put his mind at ease I have spent a little time looking up methods for doing that. I also brought it up with my mom - she says it's totally fine but it appears as though she is having to try really hard to accept it.

Personally, though, I think it's been beneficial - I'm pretty sure that if I were straight then I'd have been more focused on relationships throughout high school and I wouldn't be where I am academically today. And my friends seem to like me even more now.

So it's a little frustrating. But it's not like I wouldn't have uncomfortable / uncertain moments as a straight guy either. Regardless of the scenario it seems the best option is just to push through it.

Sorry for the rambling. I like putting my thoughts down in writing.


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## Kariva (Dec 29, 2011)

I wonder if I'll ever be able to, my parents just don't understand these things.


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## The_Mask (Dec 30, 2011)

Today, not so great. About three weeks ago I had made some post on my  facebook opposing some govt. legislation that was against gay marriage,  and my dad started drilling me about it today. He would have had to sift  through hundreds of posts to come across that. After saying some  hurtful things about the rights of homosexuals, he then proceeds to  drill me about whether or not I'm gay. WTF? You don't try to force that  kind of information out of somebody, that's just wrong. I'm not fucking  ready to tell my parents anything yet. I'm sitting there hitting the  deny button like I'm stuck in a 1.21 gigawatt shit-storm, constantly  trying to change the subject, and he just keeps pushing further and  further. When he finally gave up he said he'd love me either way  (something tells me he was fibbing), and then he tries a bit more. I  don't know if he saw through that or not cause my face must have been  bright red and my heart was beating visibly hard. That's just all kinds  of invasion of privacy. Hell, that's friggin laying it out on a table  and dissecting it. 
This is why I didn't want to stay down here for Christmas for more than a week. I would have left today, but one of my friends informed me he was having a party on Friday so I decided to stay.



Riq said:


> He also wants me to look into changing, and to help put his mind at ease  I have spent a little time looking up methods for doing that.



Fuck that shit dude.


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## Conker (Dec 30, 2011)

Alerio Corvinus said:


> I told my parents I was Asexual, and it failed to generate much response.


They'll eventually start to go "why don't you ever date?" after some period of time. Gets annoying.


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## Xeno (Dec 30, 2011)

I might come out when i get back to my house, if my parents kick me out or something because of it then so be it. I doubt they will though


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## Riq (Dec 30, 2011)

The_Mask said:


> Fuck that shit dude.


It's not like I intend on actually going through with any of that because I know they don't work.

I ended up having another conversation with him today though in which he was able to accurately describe his thoughts on the matter, thankfully. He still isn't exactly a fan of the idea. He's concerned about two things:
1) Me coming across problems as a result of people not being cool with it (ironic, I know).
2) He's had the image of me and him hanging out and playing with my kids while my wife and mom talk about whatever it is they talk about, but that obviously isn't going to happen.

Sorry about your situation, though. My dad never tried to pester me about it to find out. I just kind of ended up expecting him to be cool with it because everyone I had told prior was.


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## The_Mask (Dec 30, 2011)

Riq said:


> He's had the image of me and him hanging out and playing with my kids while my wife and mom talk about whatever it is they talk about, but that obviously isn't going to happen.



Ha ha. My parents have had the exact same image going through their heads. They constantly hint at someday having grandkids, and my brother and his fiance are way to financially unstable for that. I was thinking while my dad was ranting "well it isn't like adoption isn't an option", and then he goes on to say that it is immoral for gay people to raise children. 

Oh wait, here's another bit that'll be difficult. I've gotta somehow keep my grandparents from finding out. They're Church-of-Christ, wear dresses only, don't cut yer hair types. They've been in Africa most of my life (15 years) as missionaries.
Edit: know what, scratch that. What do I care, I barely know them.


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## Neonagon (Dec 30, 2011)

I recently came out to my family that I'm bisexual and that I've been seeing a girl in my sorority. No one believed me or took me seriously. Par for the course around here~


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## Riq (Jan 1, 2012)

The_Mask said:


> Ha ha. My parents have had the exact same image going through their heads. They constantly hint at someday having grandkids, and my brother and his fiance are way to financially unstable for that. I was thinking while my dad was ranting "well it isn't like adoption isn't an option", and then he goes on to say that it is immoral for gay people to raise children.
> 
> Oh wait, here's another bit that'll be difficult. I've gotta somehow keep my grandparents from finding out. They're Church-of-Christ, wear dresses only, don't cut yer hair types. They've been in Africa most of my life (15 years) as missionaries.
> Edit: know what, scratch that. What do I care, I barely know them.



Yeah. More connections with mine: I have two brothers, one is in high school and isn't doing well academically, one is a recovering drug addict who's like thirty. So I'm the only guy my dad would expect to be successful in that regard if I weren't gay.

Grandparents thing is a little different. My grandmother might not like the idea a whole lot, my grandfather would definitely resent it. Which would kind of suck because both of them absolutely admire me. Worst case scenario though is that they develop differing opinions and get into arguments about it. I'm fine if they don't like me so much because of it, I'd hate it if they didn't like each other as much.




Neonagon said:


> I recently came out to my family that I'm bisexual and that I've been seeing a girl in my sorority. No one believed me or took me seriously. Par for the course around here~



My mom was originally totally cool with it but now she's kind of moved backward into "yeah there's no way you're gay." Works for me.


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## The_Mask (Jan 1, 2012)

Riq said:


> My mom was originally totally cool with it but now she's kind of moved backward into "yeah there's no way you're gay." Works for me.



Stepping backwards into denial. That's a new one.


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## AlexInsane (Jan 1, 2012)

It's pretty much accepted by my aunt (whom I live with) that I'm gay, and my dad more or less knows it, but I have no idea about the rest of my family. I haven't told them, even though I'm sure they suspect something. I think out of all the grandkids/young people in my extended family, I'm the only one without a partner of the opposite sex, or even a partner at all. At some point, though, it will all come to a head, I imagine. I'm pretty used to the particular brand of ignorance that my family is fond of trotting out, so I don't think I'll have too hard a time dealing with it - if it looks like a lost cause, I'll know when to stop and leave.

I don't like to think of myself as just a gay person. That's far too limiting and demeaning - defining yourself by your sexuality is going to let you down a lot, so why bother? Your sexuality is just a tiny part of what you are.


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## Saiko (Jan 3, 2012)

The_Mask said:


> Ha ha. My parents have had the exact same image going through their heads. They constantly hint at someday having grandkids, and my brother and his fiance are way to financially unstable for that. I was thinking while my dad was ranting "well it isn't like adoption isn't an option", and then he goes on to say that it is immoral for gay people to raise children.


Hehe, my mom is like that with the family cook-book she made.

"I can't wait to share this with your wife."

"Hehehehe." _You dun have a clue do you? _

I myself am thinking of waiting until the day after I turn 18. That way I can have a fun birthday, will be legally independent, and will be able to ask to speak as an adult. And I'll be off to college like the next week, so if it doesn't go too well I won't have to deal with it / stay with a friend for too long.


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## Criminal Scum (Jan 5, 2012)

Yesterday I was hanging out with my friends at a church youth group I go to on Wed. after school. My friend, whom I will call sdf had a laptop with him and got on WoW through wi-fi.
 Eventually our conversation went to how sdf's guild leader was gay, but he wasn't (camp). My other friend said how you can never tell if someones gay; "they always hide it." I poker faced and tried not to laugh. I guess I proved that statement. Technically I'm bisexual, but still. Pretty funny.


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## brandot (Jan 5, 2012)

I have always been too scared to come out. I have a strange feeling that my mom already kinda knows, but my dad is the only issue. I don't think he would take to well to it. He is a pretty aggressive guy, and can be sometimes violent when he gets drunk. But usually he can be a nice guy, however I Don't want anything to explode. Ill wait a few years. When I am out of the house maybe.


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## Aurus ARK-III (Jan 6, 2012)

Recently, after I got out of a straight relationship, I really don't know why, but since then I started to like girls less as time goes by... I still feel attracted to women, but it's just that I don't know a single interesting woman who's not taken already (that's 0 out of 2 or 3 that are JUST friends).

I always liked big muscled anthros in games and such (yeah, even in my childhood, when I just thought they were REALLY COOL), one year before my puberty I started to fall in love for some of my teachers (all of them were women, I still had no insight of homosexual attraction). I just got to admit I was Bi some months ago, when I broke up with my ex-girlfriend because of our "unilateral relationship" in which I were the only one who cared for it. Some weeks before I broke up, I played with some friends of mine, one of them being a Bi and the other being straight. It looked like an innocent roleplay, then I turned it into some kind of Yaoi Fanservice in MSN Chatgroup, me and my Bi friend fighting for the straight guy's attention (none of us knew each other's sexuality for sure, and I didn't care for it, I was just playing, I thought). Then I broke up, when I just couldn't stand that girl anymore, and that Bi friend of mine stood by my side, when no one else did console me. He was always saying things that got me confused, like when I said "I'm looking for a girl who likes things I like, RPG, games and such..." and he replied "Well, I am here!", some times I even doubted he was a guy, because I was so close-minded at that time that I couldn't bear imagine to have a boyfriend, even if I liked so much to look at furry gay art, or gay porn on sites on the web.

My family is always saying things like "I'd prefer to have a whore for a daughter than a gay son" or things that makes homosexuality look like an "UNFORGIVABLE SIN" or some kind of illness (or even the act of devils possessing their bodies, that's surely a pretty crazy way of thinking about it). What matters is that I fell in love for that Bi friend of mine, maybe because I was feeling all alone and such, and I misplaced a strong friendship for love, but in the end we were each other's boyfriend for some time.

Things didn't go very well after a few weeks, as he was going pretty bad at school, and I could barely talk with him, so I felt abandoned. I met someone who quickly became so important for me that every time we talked I felt like I had found my other half, my soul-mate. I tried to lie it to myself and everyone else, but I fell in love for that guy, I just didn't want to cheat on my boyfriend, I even had the crazy idea of getting away from them both, disappearing from their lives, but that other guy made me open my eyes to reality, and helped me make up my mind.

When I had the opportunity to have a serious conversation with my boyfriend, I told him exactly how I was feeling, and in the end he told me he was passing trough harsh times at school, about his low grades, and the friends he was losing. I felt even worse, like if I was the reason for it to be happening to him. It didn't took long until I decided to be that other guy's boyfriend, and I broke with my Bi friend, we are still very good friends (and he still says things like "your virginity is mine", and things that makes me think he still have hopes for we making up again).

Sorry for making this so very long, but it's not over yet. As soon as I felt comfortable with the idea of being Bi, I told one of my friends (a straight guy), for my surprise he didn't try to kill me, as a I thought he would. And then on, I felt more and more free to tell my friends that I am Bi. Actually, the only ones who don't know of my sexuality are my family and some "not so important now" friends. My sister does know, I told her about it and practically ordered her to keep it a secret form our parents and other familiars.

Well, I am pretty comfortable with being a Bi, because in fact I feel attracted for both men and women, although I am quite picky with what exactly attracts me, like red-haired girls, or older-looking guys. I decided to tell my parents about my sexuality only after I get a place for myself to live on my own, or with friends, or even with my current (and if it continues as is, my definitive) boyfriend so that I can (if necessary) say in their faces I can be whatever I want and I can handle myself pretty good with or without their approval.


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## Jonny (Jan 10, 2012)

AlexInsane said:


> I don't like to think of myself as just a gay person. That's far too limiting and demeaning - defining yourself by your sexuality is going to let you down a lot, so why bother? Your sexuality is just a tiny part of what you are.



Yes, I agree. I mean, yes, I like other guys, but I also like to read and play videogames and so on and so forth. 

I've told my immediate family and they're fine with it. My brother and sister make the occassional joke but no more than that.  When I got to uni, I wasn't sure how to go about coming out, if at all, but eventually I decided to just drop it into the conversation casually as if it wasn't a big deal, which it isn't. Nobody really batted an eyelid.

That said, actually meeting and forming a relationship with another guy at this stage is proving slightly more problematic!


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## Kitutal (Jan 17, 2012)

I second (or probably quite a lot more than that by now) everything in the original essay. I grew up with little interest in an intimate relationship, never had a proper girlfriend, then I hit 23, and a few little hints (the biggest being my appreciation for a bunch of nice messages sent to me by men on a site I had joined) I started looking again at the people around me (and rather more slowly reconsidering that intimate relationship thing). Long story short, now I know, wish I had done earlier, missed out on a lot...

And the point of this thread, I plan on dropping hints, saying things that people pass over as normal then suddenly double back when they realise what I said. Just anything that can get an interesting reaction out of people. My parents, I'm not sure I could tell them, I'm not a telling people person, more a letting them find out. I have a nice plan there, invite 'friend' over one day, cue intimate greeting, hand holding, casual introductions, then offer to get him a drink. Their reaction will be wonderful.


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## Aetius (Jan 28, 2012)

Plan on coming out in a couple days, sweet zombie jesus look over me.


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## Keeroh (Jan 28, 2012)

Crusader Mike said:


> Plan on coming out in a couple days, sweet zombie jesus look over me.


I'll be looking over you, my child. 
No, but seriously, good for you. Do you know if the people/person you're coming out to is going to react a certain way?


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## Yago (Jan 28, 2012)

Coming out's fairly scary. I lost sleep for months over it. And, as of now, only my good friends know, and my older sister.

I don't think I'll ever tell my mom unless I settle down with a nice guy. Then I'll most likely tell her I'm getting married, and when Mom asks to meet the lucky lady, I'll correct her and say man. 

Yeah, that'd go over amusingly. If she doesn't die from it. That said, mom's cool with LGBT community. Just...not marriage. That's something about man woman blah blah or whatever. 

My father who I don't talk to wouldn't take it quite so well. I'm honestly not sure if I'd get killed, disowned, or if he'd die or get over it. He's a huuuuge homophobe. 

My step-father probably wouldn't either, but oh well, he's not exactly true family, and he'd get over it in time.

Edit: Both father figures are more of haters than phobes. They'd rather just execute the non-straights.


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## Lunar (Jan 28, 2012)

Welp, it's official.  Tonight I have officially come out as a lesbian.  Whee *throws confetti*


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## Aetius (Jan 29, 2012)

Thingymabob said:


> I'll be looking over you, my child.
> No, but seriously, good for you. Do you know if the people/person you're coming out to is going to react a certain way?



Not sure, going to find out x3


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## Keeroh (Jan 29, 2012)

Crusader Mike said:


> Not sure, going to find out x3



Well, best of luck and all that jazz. It's a wonderful moment, exceptionally freeing in a very distinct way. Even if it's not that well received, it's out in the open and makes life a bit easier. (In my experience, at least.)



Lunar said:


> Welp, it's official.  Tonight I have officially come out as a lesbian.  Whee *throws confetti*


High five! How did it go?


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## Lunar (Jan 29, 2012)

How do I go about coming out to my mom's family?  One at a time, or at the next family gathering?


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## Aetius (Jan 29, 2012)

Thingymabob said:


> Well, best of luck and all that jazz. It's a wonderful moment, exceptionally freeing in a very distinct way. Even if it's not that well received, it's out in the open and makes life a bit easier. (In my experience, at least.)



Thank you : )

I hope it goes well.


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## Keeroh (Jan 29, 2012)

Lunar said:


> How do I go about coming out to my mom's family?  One at a time, or at the next family gathering?



Depends, tbh. One-on-one is usually best, you can respond to their questions and not leave them with assumptions. If you do it as a big family thing, it can go very strongly- but either way. If you have a very accepting family, then it might just be a lot of group hugs and crying. If your families response is questionable, it might not be as pleasant.


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## Bornes (Feb 5, 2012)

I was born female.
I had grown up all the time thinking I was not a girl.
But apparently I didn't officially "come out" about it until I was in france with my grandma (I don't remember this) that I thought I should've been a boy. I was 11 at the time.
I came out as bisexual to my parents when I was 15-16, just by straight up saying "Hey guys, I have something to tell you. I'm bisexual." at the dinner table.
Family went silent. I got the "We love you no matter what you are" speech several times later. (And then once I actually started maybe dating girls, dad showed he was lying about the whole thing).

Had "crossdressed" as a dude pretty much all of my life, but when I went to college, I found the "androgyne" label and "came out" as that. I dressed/acted totally androgynously and I guess the intent was to just mess with peoples' heads overall. But at the time I figured I was going to become a totally sexless individual and that was my goal (later I figured out I was ignorant and it'd never happen, so learn to cope now).

It wasn't until I went through boot camp that I realized, hey wait a second, "lol androgynes are stupid I'm really a female-to-male transsexual" (FtM). It went down a little more seriously than that, but yeah. Sent out an email to my parents (I was 22ish by this point, and away from them, in A-school [kind of like military trade school]). It didn't go down very well.

I'm now 24 and my parents say they support me, but I haven't pursued transition at all [yet] since US military forces me into the closet about it. I fully intend to transition (surgically and all) once I get out, but in the meantime my career is too important to me to just drop it all to go get a penis. I do just fine where I'm at now, and I pass (meaning: people think I'm a dude) to everyone that doesn't have prior knowledge that I'm female. I just kind of roll with the 'powerdyke' label for now and live and let live.

I'm pretty certain that, similar to the whole coming out as bi situation, once my parents actually start to realize that "lol not a phase" and I actually go get surgery and shit, they won't be so supportive. But I don't really care about it. They know that I am not too connected to them and that if they didn't bend over backwards to pretend they liked me and guilted me to visit them, I'd never associate with them anyway. (It took them paying for my flight from Japan to the US to go see them on my holiday leave period when I could've seen them every year for three years before that. And really I was super guilted into it and hated 'wasting' my time with them.)

Anyway, it's all whatever. I've lived with my current body long enough and gone through enough shit not even related to sexuality or gender that being pissed off at someone calling me a dyke instead of a man is too far down on my list of shit to care about.
Though you can rest assured that if you go out of your way to insult me (online) or call me female pronouns, I will add you straight to the ignore/block list and/or not bother responding to you at all.

Not saying I'm not open for talk about the whole sensitive issue that is transness. I'm just saying don't go out of your way to be a dick to me. Small difference, but existent.
That said, I haven't been on these forums for long. But what I have read it does seem like a lot of you are really ignorant about transsexuality. So if you do have questions or anything, feel free.


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## pikayoshigirl (Feb 7, 2012)

Earlier I posted on this thread saying that I was bisexual.

I'm having second thoughts about this. In all honesty...I can't see myself with a guy.

I tried dating a guy once. Wasn't that fantastic, in all honesty. And the guy ended up leading me on, anyway.

There is a girl that I'm interested in right now, though. Even though the chance I stand with her is probably minimal at best. I'm friends with her on facebook, but that's about as far as it goes. I just feel like I could connect to a girl far better than I could connect to any guy.

Oh, and I don't like penis. Just putting that out there.


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## Lunar (Feb 7, 2012)

pikayoshigirl said:


> Earlier I posted on this thread saying that I was bisexual.
> 
> I'm having second thoughts about this. In all honesty...I can't see myself with a guy.
> 
> ...



That's how I felt, too.  Only recently was I just like, "Fuck it, I'm a lesbian."


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## pikayoshigirl (Feb 7, 2012)

That's...exactly how I'm feeling right now! :0

Maybe you're right, we are twins.


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## Lunar (Feb 7, 2012)

Why do you think you only stand a "minimal chance" with this girl?


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## pikayoshigirl (Feb 7, 2012)

To be truthful, she's a lesbian too, but I don't know. I'm too shy to make any attempt to really talk to her.


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## Lunar (Feb 7, 2012)

Oh, pish posh.  If she's anything like a lot of the gay people I've met, she'll be glad to have found another one, to at least talk to, if nothing else.  I've noticed that a lot of the so-called bisexuals or lesbians claim to be so, but then they're like "whuuuut?  Vagina?  Gross!"


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## pikayoshigirl (Feb 7, 2012)

Oh, she's definitely a lesbian. She's best friends with one of my guy friends. He said she won't even consider dating guys (I feel bad for him; he has a crush on her xD). Apparently, she used to date guys when she was younger, but not anymore. She says she only did it because she was afraid people would find out she was gay, so she pretended to be straight...I'm not sure what to think of this.

She's pretty open about it on Facebook now, though.

I just wish I had more confidence. Going to an all-girl high school made me afraid of other girls, I think. And I'm attracted to them. -_-;


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## Lunar (Feb 7, 2012)

I usually just play the adorable bashful card, and that usually works.  Kickin' at the ground and givin' em that Eeyore-ish look.  And compliments.  Compliments go a long way.


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## pikayoshigirl (Feb 7, 2012)

I love giving out compliments. I hope she doesn't think I'm creepy or anything if I give her one. I think I'm just being paranoid, though.


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## Lunar (Feb 7, 2012)

Nah.  I can't think of anyone who wouldn't appreciate a compliment.


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## Aetius (Feb 15, 2012)

Update: So I came out to almost every person I knew besides my family members.

I pretty much got a positive reception, although some people are greatly confused as I was the straightest person they knew according to them.


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## Schwimmwagen (Feb 15, 2012)

Crusader Mike said:


> Update: So I came out to almost every person I knew besides my family members.
> 
> I pretty much got a positive reception, although some people are greatly confused as I was the straightest person they knew according to them.



HIGH FIVE.

You should come out to me next.


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## shteev (Feb 15, 2012)

Crusader Mike said:


> Update: So I came out to almost every person I knew besides my family members.
> 
> I pretty much got a positive reception, although some people are greatly confused as I was the straightest person they knew according to them.



What's keeping you from coming out to your family? You should focus on that. The sooner the better, IMO.


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## Schwimmwagen (Feb 15, 2012)

shteev said:


> What's keeping you from coming out to your family? You should focus on that. The sooner the better, IMO.



Take it from me, that will probably be a hell of a shit move. 

He should only do it if he can understand his family's opinion on homosaxophones some time beforehand.


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## shteev (Feb 15, 2012)

Gibby said:


> Take it from me, that will probably be a hell of a shit move.
> 
> He should only do it if he can understand his family's opinion on homosaxophones some time beforehand.



So if they don't like homosexuals he's just supposed to stay closeted and never come out to his parents? What happens when they expect him to get a girlfriend?


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## Schwimmwagen (Feb 15, 2012)

shteev said:


> So if they don't like homosexuals he's just supposed to stay closeted and never come out to his parents? What happens when they expect him to get a girlfriend?



Way to not read my post for the suggested course of action.

I don't know about you guys, but I would rather my parents be all like "hur dur get gurl fran" rather than treat me like a piece of shit altogether. I'd like the same for Mike, too. He is my friend and I'd hate to see him get treated in such a poor way.


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## shteev (Feb 15, 2012)

Gibby said:


> Way to not read my post for the suggested course of action.
> 
> I don't know about you guys, but I would rather my parents be all like "hur dur get gurl fran" rather than treat me like a piece of shit altogether. I'd like the same for Mike, too. He is my friend and I'd hate to see him get treated in such a poor way.



I responded to your suggested method of action. What if he finds that his parents don't like homosexuality?

And the truth is always better than a lie.


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## Aetius (Feb 15, 2012)

shteev said:


> I responded to your suggested method of action. What if he finds that his parents don't like homosexuality?
> 
> And the truth is always better than a lie.



Sometimes a lie may be better imo sometimes, I just want to try to become less dependent on them before I tell them I am gay to minimize any damage that could be created.


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## Schwimmwagen (Feb 15, 2012)

shteev said:


> I responded to your suggested method of action. What if he finds that his parents don't like homosexuality?
> 
> And the truth is always better than a lie.



Consider yourself lucky that you had an accepting family. It's always good to be truthful about it, but do we know that Mike's family is accepting or not? It'd be a shame for him to come out to a family that doesn't accept him. I did that once, and it shouldn't have to happen to anyone. All in all, I wish him the best with it.


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## shteev (Feb 15, 2012)

[FONT=Tahoma, Calibri, Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif]





Gibby said:


> Consider yourself lucky that you had an accepting family. It's always good to be truthful about it, but do we know that Mike's family is accepting or not? It'd be a shame for him to come out to a family that doesn't accept him. I did that once, and it shouldn't have to happen to anyone. All in all, I wish him the best with it.


[/FONT]

[FONT=Tahoma, Calibri, Verdana, Geneva, sans-serif]I agree, that wouldn't be good. Perhaps Mike should (very) subtly hint towards it, maybe plant the seed prior and let it simmer for a bit...?[/FONT]




Crusader Mike said:


> Sometimes a lie may be better imo sometimes, I just want to try to become less dependent on them before I tell them I am gay to minimize any damage that could be created.



That also works.


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## eversleep (Feb 15, 2012)

Probably been posted already but I don't see a point in coming out.


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## Spatel (Feb 16, 2012)

Once you come out, you start acting gayer. It's gradual, but most of the incentive to hold back those mannerisms is gone, so you start to act like the fruitcake you always wanted to be able to act like.


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## eversleep (Feb 16, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Once you come out, you start acting gayer. It's gradual, but most of the incentive to hold back those mannerisms is gone, so you start to act like the fruitcake you always wanted to be able to act like.


Okay but for people who aren't fruitcakey, there's no point.


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## The_Mask (Feb 21, 2012)

Crusader Mike said:


> Sometimes a lie may be better imo sometimes, I just want to try to become less dependent on them before I tell them I am gay to minimize any damage that could be created.


 Ditto sir. I'm on a student loan that is dependent on my parents. Still haven't decided whether it's worth risking losing my financial aid. 





Spatel said:


> Once you come out, you start acting gayer. It's gradual, but most of the incentive to hold back those mannerisms is gone, so you start to act like the fruitcake you always wanted to be able to act like.


 Not a fruitcake. It did occur to me the other day that I could pretty much get away with anything if people knew though. The trolling opportunities would triple.


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## Keeroh (Feb 21, 2012)

The_Mask said:


> Ditto sir. I'm on a student loan that is dependent on my parents. Still haven't decided whether it's worth risking losing my financial aid.



I'm in the same boat. Honestly, I have accepting friends. I'm completely okay with putting off being out to my family until I'm completely independent from em. Getting ones education and life stable is a bigger priority than being completely honest about your sexuality to your family. It's only temporary, but you can set yourself back pretty damn far if you have an extremely negative reaction and get booted out and cut off.


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## Goronian (Feb 28, 2012)

Hello, my username is Goronian and my biological sex happens to not be the same, as my psychological gender. It's a long and convoluted story, but, suffice to say, my then-future husband helped me get through the worst of it and encouraged me to come out, mostly to myself. My mother is aware of it, although she mostly pretends she never heard it, since on the outside we look "normal". Even had your traditional wedding, and stuff. So yeah, that's that.


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## Kosdu (Feb 28, 2012)

Well...... hey guys.

Just want to know what to expect from a highschool, junior year if one comes out. The school is full of a bunch of "good 'ole boys". Alot more jerks then out here in Idaho.
My friend wants to come out. People already give him stuff for being a furry. It's complicated, but he has two personalities. No, he is not crazy. It's complicated.
One is extremely forgiving.... however his other has a temper even if he is also a friend. I don't want my friend to go open as he wants to if more people will taunt him.....
He is good at holding back anger.... but being very strong and trained in some extremely deadly martial arts moves....... yeehhhhh.



Might go open myself one day. My Mom and a few friends know.
Problem is, I haven't fully explored this sexuality yet. I mean... in... err.... yiff..... yes, but not with another in person. Just want to make sure it is what I want to claim.

I don't suppose anyone knows a gay-meter test? (less than half kidding)


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## Lunar (Feb 28, 2012)

I'd get a little more experience before you fully come out.  As for your friend, if he knows how to fight and defend himself, what's the worry?


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## Kosdu (Feb 28, 2012)

He hates violence.

The one time I saw him angry he nearly ripped someone's face off. I stepped in.

His life is just hard enough already.


If everything goes right... I'll have PLENTY of experience this summer.


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## Lunar (Feb 28, 2012)

Then he's gotta make a decision.  Defend himself, or be a closeted gay.


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## Kosdu (Feb 28, 2012)

Does it have to be that simple?

I sure hope not........



Not like he even has to finish school. He already has a very well paying job with SEGA.


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## Saiko (Mar 10, 2012)

Hehe, well I had an... interesting month while I was away from FAF. Right around... I think three weeks ago, a friend from church asked for my phone number. Please note that I'd met him only a month earlier, but we both went to a two-night long church thingy where we were in the same house; so we knew each other halfway decently. I gave him ma number, and we texted sarcastic jokes back and forth for like 15 minutes. Right at the end he randomly asks, "Do you have a girlfriend?"

Me being myself, I reply rather innocently with, "No, I've never had one. Haven't really ever wanted one either."
His reply: "Are you..."

_FFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-_
This is a kid from _church_ who actively added to a recent discussion on/against homosexuality in Sunday school... yet I really didn't want to lie to him, I'd juuuust about gotten a chance to come out to a really close friend of mine, and I really wanted to tell someone. So I figured to hell with it and told him that I'm bi with a boyfriend. I was relieved, and a little surprised, to get the response, "I don't judge."

Then not five minutes later I get another text: "I'm bi as well."
 WHADAFUUUUUCK?! I thought you said you were anti-gay!

Soooo, now I'm out of the closet to someone after like 6 months at the price of that someone spending the past month blowing my phone up. And I'm still waiting for a chance to tell my other friend. He makes plenty of dirty jokes at me, a good number of them gay-jokes, so there's no shortage in the topic coming up. The problem is that he never seems to make the right kinda jokes when we're alone. >.<

EDIT: Ugh, just read back over this post. Sorry for it kinda being all over the place. One of those instances where I could either explain EVERYTHING in a frickin' tomb that kinda makes sense, or make a short compilation of loosely related facts and events... Apparently the halfway point wasn't much of an improvement x3


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## BossLike (Mar 16, 2012)

*~~ ~~ ~~*

I'm fully agreed with you


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## SL1PSH0D (Mar 16, 2012)

Heh. I suppose I could tell of my comic out, though its nothing particularly interesting.

I remember being a child (like 8 or so) and starting to really notice that in public you'd see a lot of guys and girls holding hands, or kissing on the telly, and husbands and wives and that such. So I asked my mother (who is a closet conservative posing as an open-minded liberal) why two boys or two girls can't be in love. She gave a basic "its okay to be, but it has to be a secret because they'd get picked on" type thing. I found it appalling. I could never settle on the idea of only being able to be with type person. I thought that so long as I could love them and they could love me, it didn't matter what they looked like. 

As I grew up and got to about middle school, I started hearing the term "bisexual" thrown around. I figured it made sense enough, so I was willing to accept that as a label for myself. Eventually, the topic came up with my mother some how. I don't recall the reason... We were watching a movie with a gay couple or something. Well, I told her I was bi. I've never really been shy to that fact.
"No you're not." My mother says poignantly.
"Uhm... Yes I am."
"Have you ever had sex with another man?" She asks.
"Well... No." I respond, not really sure where she's going with this.
"Well then you're not bi."
That statement really bothered me. At the time I had never had sex with a female, either. Did that make me Asexual?

Finally, I work up the gall to ask out of curiosity. "Mom. What would you do if I was gay?"
She shuffled uncomfortably for a while.
"Its not that I wouldn't love you.... I just wouldn't claim you as my son." was her reply. It finally donned on me that she was secretly homophobic. -__-
When I confronted her about it, she told me "No! I have no problem with faggots! I have plenty of faggot friends."

...Yep. She's a bigot.

Anyways, I put that out of my mind. I never really care about my mother's impression of me anyways. I knew I'd never be good enough, so it didn't really matter if I tried to please her or not. I was just gonna be me, and that was that.
I lived under the label of Bisexual up until senior year of high school. To be honest, it had always kind of bothered me, the title. I didn't really think it was true for me, but I didn't know what I was. I wasn't _attracted_ to males or females. I wasn't attracted to the typical "OMG (s)he's hawt~" thing. It was an attraction to people's personality. As emotionally "turned on" as I was by a person was how physically turned on I was. I know, I know... That sounds like a yuppie thing to say, but whatever. It was true. I didn't care if they were male/female, gay/straight, black/white, skinny/fat, "pretty"/a burn-victim.... So long as they loved me. ^^;

That's when I discovered the term "Pansexuality" (which is WILDLY misunderstood, but that's another story). The thought of an all-inclusive sexuality based on an attraction to love rather than the physical body was PERFECT for me. :3

So yeah.... As far as "coming out", I was always very open about it. Yeah, I got picked on and harassed, but it never really bothered me. I dunno. Just coming to terms with the right terms was my challenge. Heh~


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## Kosdu (Mar 16, 2012)

My ex-love and closest friend plans on coming out by making a slideshow video of his furry art, then "My Boyfriends Back" will come on and suddenly it will change to his gay art.
I'm hoping it goes well.



I might be bi, I might even be gay. Not sure at this point.
I'll come out with it once I figure out. Screw the closet.


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## Yago (Mar 16, 2012)

Kosdu said:


> My ex-love and closest friend plans on coming out by making a slideshow video of his furry art, then "My Boyfriends Back" will come on and suddenly it will change to his gay art.
> I'm hoping it goes well.
> 
> 
> ...



You're most likely bisexual. I don't plan on coming out. It's not a secret. I just do not feel the need to bring it up.


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## SL1PSH0D (Mar 16, 2012)

Yeah, I've never really felt the need to come out of the closet. I don't need to go flaunting what I do and do not like to stick where. Heh~

But if someone asked out right, I'm always pretty honest and open. There's really no need to hide who you really are.


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## Kosdu (Mar 16, 2012)

It's been eating my friend from the inside, his family is homophobic and he is sick of hiding it.
Wants proper dates and all that.



Hehe, so I can flaunt it where I want to stick it? 

Yeah, I might just put myself in the open so I can get such a relationship if I get comofrtable enough with it.


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## SL1PSH0D (Mar 16, 2012)

Sadly enough, my best relationships have started on the internet. 

Though I haven't had too much to do with guys. I've casually dated, but nothing serious (other than once, but it turned into a long, drawn-out platonic thing). I kinda feel obligated to have a more meaningful relationship with another male.
But its definitely best to grow from a friendship..... Alas, an out of the blue "Hey how are you~" risk taking can always be fun and romantic. ^^;;


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## ArgonTheFox (Mar 20, 2012)

Hi again.

My mother has decided to go on holiday to see my nan who lives over in Ireland, and I was thinking about using the time to come out to my dad. but im just not sure how I should do it. I was thinking about doing the same "oh hi, im gay" kinda thing or should I like leave a bit of paper on his desk before running to hide somewhere.

why I want to come out to my dad while my mum is away is because I tried coming out last year and my mum just forced me back into the closet just like "OH NO NO YOU WONT KNOW UNTIL YOUR 30". Im assuming my dad will either just do this silent nod as he always does or just sit there like "w.. .what? how do youse know?" and theres no chance of him reacting violently. hes a 56 year old man.


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## Yago (Mar 20, 2012)

ArgonTheFox said:


> Hi again.
> 
> My mother has decided to go on holiday to see my nan who lives over in Ireland, and I was thinking about using the time to come out to my dad. but im just not sure how I should do it. I was thinking about doing the same "oh hi, im gay" kinda thing or should I like leave a bit of paper on his desk before running to hide somewhere.
> 
> why I want to come out to my dad while my mum is away is because I tried coming out last year and my mum just forced me back into the closet just like "OH NO NO YOU WONT KNOW UNTIL YOUR 30". Im assuming my dad will either just do this silent nod as he always does or just sit there like "w.. .what? how do youse know?" and theres no chance of him reacting violently. hes a 56 year old man.



A note and running away is childish. I'd not recommend it.

Being spontaneous is not the best option, in my opinion, because it is surprising and people are often difficult to deal with when surprised and it could change the outcome. I'd advise either maturely telling him during a conversation that approaches the topic.


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## ArgonTheFox (Mar 20, 2012)

Yago said:


> A note and running away is childish. I'd not recommend it.
> 
> Being spontaneous is not the best option, in my opinion, because it is surprising and people are often difficult to deal with when surprised and it could change the outcome. I'd advise either maturely telling him during a conversation that approaches the topic.



Ok, many thanks. I suppose the reason why I didn't think of telling him in a conversation was because ive had the idea set out of just telling him and getting it done and over with, but I suppose being confident about telling people is part of coming out I suppose.


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## Yago (Mar 20, 2012)

ArgonTheFox said:


> Ok, many thanks. I suppose the reason why I didn't think of telling him in a conversation was because ive had the idea set out of just telling him and getting it done and over with, but I suppose being confident about telling people is part of coming out I suppose.



Yes.

You don't want to just HEY I'M GAY. It tends to surprise people. And it's never good to do that with  important   matters.


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## Kryn (Mar 21, 2012)

Well sometimes you have to surprise people. I haven't came out to my mother yet because we never talk about anything of a sexual nature. That includes even just talk about relationships.

I never had a "brids and the bees" talk, dating advice, or even a question about why I'm 23 and never had a girlfriend. From neither of my parents actually. I think she knows I'm gay and too afraid to ask.

Basically I'm just going to have to surprise her one day.


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## Criminal Scum (Mar 21, 2012)

I'm planning on coming out before graduating next year. To start, would it be a bad idea to tell people I absolutely trust (a couple even have gay friends) through something like Facebook _soon_, and tell others over an extended time period? It's been eating at me for a long time and I've about had it. I feel like it could pull some stress off of me. My main concern is whether FB is a good idea or not, since I can PM people. I feel like I'm being a bitch about this.


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## Yago (Mar 21, 2012)

Criminal Scum said:


> I'm planning on coming out before graduating next year. To start, would it be a bad idea to tell people I absolutely trust (a couple even have gay friends) through something like Facebook _soon_, and tell others over an extended time period? It's been eating at me for a long time and I've about had it. I feel like it could pull some stress off of me. My main concern is whether FB is a good idea or not, since I can PM people. I feel like I'm being a bitch about this.



Facebook is just as leaving a note, immature and rude. Unless it's a few friends that you really trust, I'd not go for that idea. Even if you do trust them and they'd understand, it's best to tell them in person IMO. Though I did tell my best friend over a PM in skype. I tried to say it in person. I couldn't even start the sentence.


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## Criminal Scum (Mar 21, 2012)

Yago said:


> Facebook is just as leaving a note, immature and rude. Unless it's a few friends that you really trust, I'd not go for that idea. Even if you do trust them and they'd understand, it's best to tell them in person IMO. Though I did tell my best friend over a PM in skype. I tried to say it in person. I couldn't even start the sentence.



I can understand why one would feel that way. It would only be a select few people, not a public announcement, and it wouldn't be, "From Criminal Scum: 'I'm gay lol.'"

I just don't know how it'd turn out, nonetheless know if I can tell them in person. I'm afraid I might lose a friend if I'm overheard.


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## JArt. (Mar 21, 2012)

Criminal Scum said:


> I just don't know how it'd turn out, nonetheless know if I can tell them in person. I'm afraid I might lose a friend if I'm overheard.



Iknow what you meani've always been raised to be homophobic ive always had homophobic friends, im Catholic and Texan and i dont ant to admit it to myself but i think im bisexual, i mean ive never been attracted to guys ive always gotten aroused by women but lets jus say ive done stuff with two friends of mine who are boys (nothing anal), i enjoy gay porn, ive never had agirlfriend; i dont know why ivenever been truely aroused by a boy but some how the things just happened with my two closest friends more than once to be specicfic, no offense to any homosexuals or bisexuals out there but i dont want to be bisexual.


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## Yago (Mar 21, 2012)

Criminal Scum said:


> I can understand why one would feel that way. It would only be a select few people, not a public announcement, and it wouldn't be, "From Criminal Scum: 'I'm gay lol.'"
> 
> I just don't know how it'd turn out, nonetheless know if I can tell them in person. I'm afraid I might lose a friend if I'm overheard.



Understandable. I realized it wouldn't be public. But Facebook is the land of bullshit and drama. Posting *ANYTHING* there, I deem ridiculous. Especially important matters.

It'd be much more serious and reasonable if you did it confidently in person or through another less blah medium.


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## Criminal Scum (Mar 21, 2012)

Yago said:


> Understandable. I realized it wouldn't be public. But Facebook is the land of bullshit and drama. Posting *ANYTHING* there, I deem ridiculous. Especially important matters.
> 
> It'd be much more serious and reasonable if you did it confidently in person or through another less blah medium.


I could send out e-mails :V I don't actually have other contact info for all of the 3, maybe 4 people I plan on telling first. Facebook is shit, though.


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## Yago (Mar 21, 2012)

Criminal Scum said:


> I could send out e-mails :V I don't actually have other contact info for all of the 3, maybe 4 people I plan on telling first. Facebook is shit, though.



Yeah. Facebook even in a PM will make you seem desperate and annoying about it. But I'm sure you can get the info fairly easily.


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## Criminal Scum (Mar 21, 2012)

I think I'll do that, then. Thanks for your input.


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## Yago (Mar 21, 2012)

Criminal Scum said:


> I think I'll do that, then. Thanks for your input.



Any time.


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## Spatel (Mar 21, 2012)

Kryn said:


> I never had a "brids and the bees" talk, dating advice, or even a question about why I'm 23 and never had a girlfriend. From neither of my parents actually. I think she knows I'm gay and too afraid to ask.



It is common for straight men to lose their virginity late, particularly if they are nerds. Mid-to-late 20s is becoming increasingly common, thanks to the internet, and the economy, and some other cultural dynamics. If nobody is suspicious you're 23 and still single it's because it isn't really that suspicious. 



JArt. said:


> Iknow what you meani've always been raised to be  homophobic ive always had homophobic friends, im Catholic and Texan and i  dont ant to admit it to myself but i think im bisexual, i mean ive  never been attracted to guys ive always gotten aroused by women but lets  jus say ive done stuff with two friends of mine who are boys (nothing  anal), i enjoy gay porn, ive never had agirlfriend; i dont know why  ivenever been truely aroused by a boy but some how the things just  happened with my two closest friends more than once to be specicfic, no  offense to any homosexuals or bisexuals out there but i dont want to be  bisexual.



Not wanting to be bisexual pretty much proves you are. Welcome to the club. Get your spandex and your guitar, you've got a bright career in glam rock ahead of you.


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## JArt. (Mar 22, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Not wanting to be bisexual pretty much proves you are. Welcome to the club. Get your spandex and your guitar, you've got a bright career in glam rock ahead of you.



Heh; you're joking right im anything but Bi i just find normal  porn "boring" that dosent mean anything and those things i did,didn't even enjoy still don't enjoy it its nothing just some sort of 5-year phase im sure it will be over my senoir yearof high school


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## Criminal Scum (Mar 22, 2012)

JArt. said:


> Heh; you're joking right im anything but Bi i just find normal  porn "boring" that dosent mean anything and those things i did,didn't even enjoy still don't enjoy it its nothing just some sort of 5-year phase im sure it will be over my senoir yearof high school


I'm pretty sure phases don't last _five years._â€‹


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## Bipolar Bear (Mar 22, 2012)

I'm Bisexual. I don't know, but for some reason I just love both genders in each and every way. It also leaves more flexibility in who I can pick.


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## Spatel (Mar 22, 2012)

JArt. said:


> Heh; you're joking right im anything but Bi i just find normal  porn "boring" that dosent mean anything and those things i did,didn't even enjoy still don't enjoy it its nothing just some sort of 5-year phase im sure it will be over my senoir yearof high school



Most straight guys don't watch gay porn because they find straight porn "boring". Most bisexuals don't find straight porn boring either. Just putting things into perspective for ya. You were raised in a homophobic environment, in Texas no less. I think that's messing with your judgment. 

And not enjoying the first couple sexual experiences is normal. It's awkward regardless of sexuality.


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## JArt. (Mar 22, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Most straight guys don't watch gay porn because they find straight porn "boring". Most bisexuals don't find straight porn boring either. Just putting things into perspective for ya. You were raised in a homophobic environment, in Texas no less. I think that's messing with your judgment.
> 
> And not enjoying the first couple sexual experiences is normal. It's awkward regardless of sexuality.



I think i need just stay away from my friends for a while and talk to girls more then everything will be fine it was nothing gay i just got too conntected to them and i think it'd be better if i just not talk to them.


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## Kosdu (Mar 22, 2012)

Well, I'm sure I'm bi.

Very picky though.....


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## Yago (Mar 22, 2012)

Kosdu said:


> Well, I'm sure I'm bi.
> 
> Very picky though.....


How that thing with your father go? (Not to get off topic, but you said he might find out, that he was cool with it, what about the forums blah blah.)


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## Kosdu (Mar 22, 2012)

Ah, one post off topic will be fine.


It went okay, he didn't found out I was flirting with an older guy. That is what I'd worried about.
I didn't have to explain the forums or PM people on here. I may have to if he walks in when I am PM'ing. He's worried about pedophiles....... he is worried someone will track my IP..... really, dad?
He tries to be understanding etc., but he doesn't understand me talking to people I don't know in RL or how social I am.


I'm not sure how I'd hook up with someone in RL though =/


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## Yago (Mar 22, 2012)

Kosdu said:


> Ah, one post off topic will be fine.
> 
> 
> It went okay, he didn't found out I was flirting with an older guy. That is what I'd worried about.
> ...




More of my friends I've met online than offline. Well, actually they are equal. But I spend all my time online with my friends either way. The statistical probability of pedophiles lurking is so low. Not to say I feel immune because of it. But I'll take a minor gamble. I'm almost eighteen and intelligent enough to handle myself.


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## Yago (Mar 22, 2012)

EDIT: HOW DID THIS DOUBLE POST SO FAR APART?

Sorry. Not sure what happened.


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## JArt. (Mar 22, 2012)

Kosdu said:


> Well, I'm sure I'm bi.
> 
> Very picky though.....



Glad you could realise the true you in themean while i have some soul searchign to do, but first i need to download some songs to accompany my walk.


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## Ulma (Mar 25, 2012)

Bisexual.

Mostly nonsexual.
Its a rare thing for me to be attracted to someone, and for me to take that anywhere is an even rarer occurrence.
 Wish it weren't so...


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## JArt. (Mar 25, 2012)

Ive decided to come to terms with the fact that i am bisexual, and now i feel much better.


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## BusiSussie (Mar 25, 2012)

*like +++*

I'm like this!


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## Kahoku (Mar 25, 2012)

*Re: like +++*



BusiSussie said:


> I'm like this!



like what?


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## Criminal Scum (Mar 28, 2012)

Has this happened to anyone: the closer you get to coming out, the more you hear (particularly stinging) gay jokes or conversations about gays?
Hurts, man. :c


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## Lunar (Mar 28, 2012)

Today my mom was telling me, "Now, honey, when you start this new job, don't go telling everyone you're gay."  Yes, because I have absolutely no class and really want everyone at work to know about my personal life.


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## Criminal Scum (Mar 28, 2012)

Lunar said:


> Today my mom was telling me, "Now, honey, when you start this new job, don't go telling everyone you're gay."  Yes, because I have absolutely no class and really want everyone at work to know about my personal life.


If she knows you're a furry, then that would explain it. :V


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## Kryn (Mar 30, 2012)

Spatel said:


> It is common for straight men to lose their virginity late, particularly if they are nerds. Mid-to-late 20s is becoming increasingly common, thanks to the internet, and the economy, and some other cultural dynamics. If nobody is suspicious you're 23 and still single it's because it isn't really that suspicious.



Well I'm not a virgin, my parents wouldn't know that though. I think you're right though, even my homophobic coworkers are convinced I'm straight. And I don't even attempt to convince them I am. I never fake it and talk about all the hot girls at school or bullshit like that. I even get the odd "at least you're not gay!" or similar comment every once in awhile. Just makes me wanna scream "I LIKE DICK DAMNIT!"


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## Magick (Apr 1, 2012)

I never really had an issue with coming out, mainly because I never made a big deal out of it or made a formal declaration of it. My friends were surprisingly okay with it, they're the kinds of guys who just don't really care about that sort of thing, I guess it helps that I don't draw much attention to myself in the first place and look kinda intimidating (Dark colors, sunglasses and/or military style hat, normal expression looks sad and angry most of the time).


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## Bipolar Bear (Apr 1, 2012)

Lunar said:


> Today my mom was telling me, "Now, honey, when you start this new job, don't go telling everyone you're gay."  Yes, because I have absolutely no class and really want everyone at work to know about my personal life.



Actually, those are the kind of people I personally hate. People who boast about their sexuality and make it a big deal, so that they'll get noticed. How I came out of the closest was that I just kissed my Boyfriend on the lips when I went home that day. Then I came back a day later, and everyone was like 'OMG, YOU KISSED A GUY! ARE YOU GAY? OMG WE'RE SO PROUD OF YOU!' I couldn't really care less. But then I just told them I was Bisexual and that got them to shut up. l=P


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## Yago (Apr 1, 2012)

Foxecality said:


> Actually, those are the kind of people I personally hate. People who boast about their sexuality and make it a big deal, so that they'll get noticed. How I came out of the closest was that I just kissed my Boyfriend on the lips when I went home that day. Then I came back a day later, and everyone was like 'OMG, YOU KISSED A GUY! ARE YOU GAY? OMG WE'RE SO PROUD OF YOU!' I couldn't really care less. But then I just told them I was Bisexual and that got them to shut up. l=P




I KNOW! I hate it when people use sexuality as some attention getter. God. My high-school and it's "bisexuals" pfft.They are such posers. Totally ruin it for us. Second they get attention about it, gets all shy and claims it wasn't real and they were wrong. ugh.


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## Bipolar Bear (Apr 1, 2012)

Yago said:


> I KNOW! I hate it when people use sexuality as some attention getter. God. My high-school and it's "bisexuals" pfft.They are such posers. Totally ruin it for us. Second they get attention about it, gets all shy and claims it wasn't real and they were wrong. ugh.



Permission to Face-nuke?


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## Criminal Scum (Apr 4, 2012)

I'm about to come out to one of my friends via text (like a bitch). I'm almost positive she'll take it well (I think she has gay friends), but I can hardly bring myself to press 'send' and start the conversation.

Wish me luck. :I


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## Dragonfurry (Apr 4, 2012)

Not really that big of a coming out story for me. So basically about a week and a half ago I told my friends I was bisexual when they were asking me who i was going out with. Told them I am going out with a dude and they seemed a bit surprised and I expected my best friend to be a bit homophobic since he had that kinda attitude for a bit but I was surprised that they were cool with it. Though the real problem will be telling my parents if it ever comes to that and I dont really plan on telling them what I like in bed because honestly it is none of their business. Also my parents are homophobes and devout Christian's so I dont really want to tell them but honestly i am giving less and less shits on what my parents think anymore since I am getting closer to the magic number 18. Idk I guess I will have to see where this whole thing takes me.


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## Kosdu (Apr 4, 2012)

Good luck, Dragonfurry =)




I'm going to come out to a couple of my homophobic friends this summer, ought to be fun. I will see if they are truly my friends.
=P



My Mom still thinks I might just be in a bi-curious phase, I'm not. Massive faggot, indeed.


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## The Wretched Automatons (Apr 4, 2012)

I for one am bisexual. I haven't told anyone I know, because I don't particularly see the point. I don't know any other guys I'm particularly attracted to at the moment, so until I actually get a boyfriend, I don't think there's really much point in bothering with announcing anything to my parents or friends.


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## Criminal Scum (Apr 4, 2012)

I just came out (for the first time irl) to one of my friends. It went really well. Oh god I'm still so nervous about it. Now I need to figure out my next victim, but not before I sleep. Holy crap.


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## Kosdu (Apr 8, 2012)

Okay... so told my female friend in school and she was chill with it. 
Got a little weird when I said don't mention it anyone she was like "Why would I say that to people......?"



I've told two of my friends I'm bi, and like/have drawn yiff. Straight guys, they were chill with me.
One is like a bro, the other was a good friend but we hadn't talked in years, excpet when we met by chance in driving school.

Going to come out to my homophobe friends in person this Summer.


Hell, I think I'll just tell people if they ask. It's liberating. 

Plus, I need a boyfriend =P






I might start acting a bit camp, to get picked up by agydars. Not femme (may have the wrong def of camp), but just... availible.


This is going well ^.^


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## Yago (Apr 8, 2012)

That's great news Kosdu. Yeah, it's really liberating to tell someone.

I about died when I told my best friend, but he was REALLY cool with it. We made some jokes about it, and to this day both ways style comments gets both of us snickering since I'm bisexual.

As for yiff, that's all interesting, I suppose. Some of the arts ok.

Careful with the gaydars-- just don't change who you really are or whatever to get noticed by them. I could go out and act all gay to get a boyfriend (Which would be pretty damn sweet atm) but I'm not really flamboyant or anything in the least so I don't plan on acting it.


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## Spatel (Apr 8, 2012)

Gay men have the earrings, the v-neck shirts, and the colorful aviators if they want to look obvious. I wish there were a way to signal that you were bisexual, because I'd do that so hard. Unfortunately other than listening to Tool and being a furry I don't know any major signs that could tip people off. There is an artsy look that suggests the possibility, but it suggests artiness more than it does any sort of sexuality. Acting gay would alienate the ladies, and acting straight would alienate the fellas, and saying "I'm bisexual" all the goddamn time would get you kicked in the face. It's a difficult razor's edge to walk.

We should all just agree on something and start doing that from now on and make it ours. That will be our thing.


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## Dragonfurry (Apr 8, 2012)

Well yesterday my parents found out I am bisexual yesterday. They said many hurtful things and I did too last night. But eventually after the emotional part was over we had a talk and they accepted me for what I am. I am glad that is out of the way but it was really tough last night. Well not as dramatic a coming out story as others but hey at least its over for the most part for me.


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## Yago (Apr 8, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> Well yesterday my parents found out I am bisexual yesterday. They said many hurtful things and I did too last night. But eventually after the emotional part was over we had a talk and they accepted me for what I am. I am glad that is out of the way but it was really tough last night. Well not as dramatic a coming out story as others but hey at least its over for the most part for me.





It's sad, I hope they really are over it and things don't get bad for you. People tend to have habits of saying they've accepted you but not really done so. Empty words and all that. But I hope for your sake it really is fixed ^^. How'd they find out?


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## Rockyusa (Apr 8, 2012)

Originally, I never had any real attractions. I made excuses to my friends and family, saying I had a crush on X or Y just to push them off, but I never really had a care. Nothing specific about women interested me, and I generally thought of them as equals rather than sexual partners, potential mates or "That girl with the tits". Being extremely timid, socially awkward and generally submissive I'm not much of an assertive guy, never had those thoughts. Eventually, I just started looking at guys in that way. I was scared enough about sexual activities in general, but this really hit me hard. I did get through it with experiences involving grief, bargaining, depression and I've ultimately come to accept my sexuality. After that, I figured it'd be a good idea to come out to someone that I really trusted.
I honestly feel terrible. Not because I've been rejected, but because I've been very lucky so far. My best friend had quickly accepted me, never bringing it up but always supporting whatever I did. Other friends had also said it didn't mean anything to them and it didn't change who I was. Though rumors went around and still do, I've had no issues dealing with that. Family would be next and then I'm home free. I do believe that I'm quite fortunate to have this situation, but I feel terrible that this type of reaction seems like a fantasy to some people who may have it worse.


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## Dragonfurry (Apr 8, 2012)

Yago said:


> It's sad, I hope they really are over it and things don't get bad for you. People tend to have habits of saying they've accepted you but not really done so. Empty words and all that. But I hope for your sake it really is fixed ^^. How'd they find out?



They were on my computer and reading some of my convos when I fell asleep in front of my computer.


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## Rockyusa (Apr 8, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> They were on my computer and reading some of my convos when I fell asleep in front of my computer.



Sucks man. When I'm up late, I'm pretty paranoid they'll peak and see something they wish they hadn't.


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## Kosdu (Apr 8, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Gay men have the earrings, the v-neck shirts, and the colorful aviators if they want to look obvious. I wish there were a way to signal that you were bisexual, because I'd do that so hard. Unfortunately other than listening to Tool and being a furry I don't know any major signs that could tip people off. There is an artsy look that suggests the possibility, but it suggests artiness more than it does any sort of sexuality. Acting gay would alienate the ladies, and acting straight would alienate the fellas, and saying "I'm bisexual" all the goddamn time would get you kicked in the face. It's a difficult razor's edge to walk.
> 
> We should all just agree on something and start doing that from now on and make it ours. That will be our thing.





Actually, I think I have some V-neck shirts around here somewhere......
Honestly, I just want a guy. Not even going to try with the gals. I
'm not femme or flameboyant, but I still want to set off those gay-dars.

@Rocky

Don't feel terrible, just try to help those not so fortunate.


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## Yago (Apr 8, 2012)

Well I'd probably give you a chance Kosdu  but you're like 8 billion states away. 

Yeah, you could just hit on dudes, that tends to get people to notice (though you will offend some idiots). 

As for Dragonfurry, that just plain sucks.

I have 100% complete and total unrestricted non-monitored access on the computer. I'm insanely lucky, in that regard.


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## Spatel (Apr 8, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> They were on my computer and reading some of my convos when I fell asleep in front of my computer.



That's terrifying. That's the worst possible way for them to find out really. Not the time of your choosing 

I hope it works out. My mother had a really tough time when I came out about a year ago. She got better though. She tries. Coming out is one thing, but Parents tend to think bisexual kids are just being attention whores. Actually bringing a boyfriend home is another ballgame. When they see that you're sincere about it, and it isn't going to change, then they realize they have an adjustment to make. If they really love you, then it'll be fine.


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## Kangamutt (Apr 9, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Gay men have the earrings, the v-neck shirts, and the colorful aviators if they want to look obvious. I wish there were a way to signal that you were bisexual, because I'd do that so hard. Unfortunately other than listening to Tool and being a furry I don't know any major signs that could tip people off. There is an artsy look that suggests the possibility, but it suggests artiness more than it does any sort of sexuality. Acting gay would alienate the ladies, and acting straight would alienate the fellas, and saying "I'm bisexual" all the goddamn time would get you kicked in the face. It's a difficult razor's edge to walk.
> 
> We should all just agree on something and start doing that from now on and make it ours. That will be our thing.



Personally, I've never had this problem about being bi. I don't go with some code thing (though I do like v-neck shirts, but that's personal taste), I just go about my day doing what I do, and get attention from men and women alike. Though the start of my last relationship was pretty funny in this respect. We both tiptoed about hitting on each other, because neither one of us couldn't tell whether or not either one of us were interested. After a talk over the phone, we both found that the other was bi. It was a pretty awkward, but funny month of having that going on. Shame he turned out to be some fickle prick that couldn't even take the time to dump me properly.

So anyway, a couple coming out tales.
About a year ago, I was still pretty well rooted in the closet about myself IRL. It had gotten to the point of giving me severe depression. A friend of mine noticed and asked me what was wrong. I mustered up some courage, and told him. Well, let's just say that night didn't end too well for me.
Another time, just in January I was at a party. Played a couple rounds of King's Cup and got real chummy with a friend of a friend. Many drinks later, him and I are snuggling on the couch drunk off our asses when my friend walks by and sees us. He looks at us in a bit of surprise, namely because it was me doing this and says something about being surprised of me. All I manage to slur is "Hey man, I'm an equal opportunity lover." He looks, eyes a little glazed, and laughs. "Yeah, that does sound a lot like you."


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## Yago (Apr 9, 2012)

Kangaroo_Boy said:


> Personally, I've never had this problem about being bi. I don't go with some code thing (though I do like v-neck shirts, but that's personal taste), I just go about my day doing what I do, and get attention from men and women alike. Though the start of my last relationship was pretty funny in this respect. We both tiptoed about hitting on each other, because neither one of us couldn't tell whether or not either one of us were interested. After a talk over the phone, we both found that the other was bi. It was a pretty awkward, but funny month of having that going on. Shame he turned out to be some fickle prick that couldn't even take the time to dump me properly.
> 
> So anyway, a couple coming out tales.
> About a year ago, I was still pretty well rooted in the closet about myself IRL. It had gotten to the point of giving me severe depression. A friend of mine noticed and asked me what was wrong. I mustered up some courage, and told him. Well, let's just say that night didn't end too well for me.
> Another time, just in January I was at a party. Played a couple rounds of King's Cup and got real chummy with a friend of a friend. Many drinks later, him and I are snuggling on the couch drunk off our asses when my friend walks by and sees us. He looks at us in a bit of surprise, namely because it was me doing this and says something about being surprised of me. All I manage to slur is "Hey man, I'm an equal opportunity lover." He looks, eyes a little glazed, and laughs. "Yeah, that does sound a lot like you."



How did that night you mentioned not end well, if you don't' mind elaborating. Personally, I think it'd be kinda nice to tell people I'm bisexual without actually doing so. There's this incredibly attractive guy in my highschool who acts incredibly effeminate. I think he's gay or at least bisexual, but there's no way to know and I can't directly ask. :\

As for me, I don't think I'll come out to anyone. I'd like to hit on dudes every now and again (since, apparently, I'm an incredibly flirty person with the ladies, or so I'm told). But I can't, because although I wouldn't mind if my peers had more reason to hate me, it might make things a bit more difficult, and as I live with an incredibly homophobic burn-gays-at-stake stepfather I really don't think it'd be the best situation should he somehow find out, and my peers could very well be a portal to that.


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## Kangamutt (Apr 9, 2012)

Yago said:


> How did that night you mentioned not end well, if you don't' mind elaborating.



I got my ass kicked. Floored with one to the face, then a couple kicks to the ribs after I was down. And that's all I'm going to say about it.


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## Yago (Apr 9, 2012)

Kangaroo_Boy said:


> I got my ass kicked. Floored with one to the face, then a couple kicks to the ribs after I was down. And that's all I'm going to say about it.



Yeouch . Sorry about that. No problem, thank you for elaborating.


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## Spatel (Apr 9, 2012)

Kangaroo_Boy said:


> I got my ass kicked. Floored with one to the face, then a couple kicks to the ribs after I was down. And that's all I'm going to say about it.



That sounds terrible. That drives home the need to have some sort of code, I think. Even though it's somewhat unrelated.


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## Ad Hoc (Apr 9, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Acting gay would alienate the ladies, and acting straight would alienate the fellas


Solution: Alternate night-by-night. :V


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## BRN (Apr 10, 2012)

Okay, wow. :3


So I had a friend visit over the weekend. Not the campest gay friend imaginable, though, pretty clingy and affectionate; this morning, I just got blunt asked about his sexuality and then mine.

Twas my New Years resolution to come out by September and I decided to say fuck it and told my mom I'm bisexual [lol, I'm gay as fuck].

She's crying. Dropped the whole "unnatural", "unlikeable", "I don't want to hear about it", ad hominems and also the stereotype about gays regarding casual sex, following on from "you're not camp you can't be gay" e.t.c e.t.c...


Anyway, my dad doesn't know yet, and I trust he'd be worse. I'm keeping my Ruger close to hand and might have to leave for a few days. Heehee, sexuality is fun.


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## Spatel (Apr 10, 2012)

SIX said:


> Okay, wow. :3
> 
> 
> So I had a friend visit over the weekend. Not the campest gay friend imaginable, though, pretty clingy and affectionate; this morning, I just got blunt asked about his sexuality and then mine.
> ...



Mothers can be tough. Terribly sorry to hear about that. If she loves you she'll come around.

Before  reading this thread I thought the Brits had a much more enlightened  attitude about homosexuality, although my impression of the place comes  mostly from BBC America programming. Perhaps I've made the typical Yankee mistake and conflated the UK too much with the rest of Europe.


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## Schwimmwagen (Apr 10, 2012)

SIX said:


> Okay, wow. :3
> 
> 
> So I had a friend visit over the weekend. Not the campest gay friend imaginable, though, pretty clingy and affectionate; this morning, I just got blunt asked about his sexuality and then mine.
> ...



Show them your FA.


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## Sarcastic Coffeecup (Apr 10, 2012)

Gibby said:


> Show them your FA.


But when you do, have a recording piece ready. I want to see their reactions


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## BRN (Apr 10, 2012)

Gibby said:


> Show them your FA.


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## Tango (Apr 10, 2012)

SIX said:


>



My computer security flagged it.

it told me no. :<


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## Sarcastic Coffeecup (Apr 10, 2012)

SIX said:


>


"This Connection is Untrusted"
Yeah, not adding an exception


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## BRN (Apr 10, 2012)

lawl, take two http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_XgeYLAgHiyA/TN4pHan0DFI/AAAAAAAAARU/_cXM9tYTyOs/s1600/gay+piurge.jpg


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## Dragonfurry (Apr 10, 2012)

Spatel said:


> That's terrifying. That's the worst possible way for them to find out really. Not the time of your choosing



Update on this: So just tonight my parents found out I am dating a guy. The whole house was silent and my dad gave me a mean look. I asked them if they had a problem with it and my dad said yeah we will have a problem with it we will always have a problem with it. Then my little brother called me a faggot and shit. Sooo basicallly my mom isnt saying shit about me dating a guy but its obvious she has a problem with it. Well fuck them I dont need them to define love for me and I dont wanna deal with this stress right now the day before my therapy session. -.-


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## JArt. (Apr 10, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> Update on this: So just tonight my parents found out I am dating a guy. The whole house was silent and my dad gave me a mean look. I asked them if they had a problem with it and my dad said yeah we will have a problem with it we will always have a problem with it. Then my little brother called me a faggot and shit. Sooo basicallly my mom isnt saying shit about me dating a guy but its obvious she has a problem with it. Well fuck them I dont need them to define love for me and I dont wanna deal with this stress right now the day before my therapy session. -.-



Right on man!
Told a good friend of mine at school that i was bisexual, i then learned he's homophobic but ok whit it as long as i don't ever talk about it again.  i told some other good friends but they all thought i was joking which is good because as it turns out they are also homophobic, and not as accepting.


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## Dragonfurry (Apr 10, 2012)

JArt. said:


> Right on man!
> Told a good friend of mine at school that i was bisexual, i then learned he's homophobic but ok whit it as long as i don't ever talk about it again.  i told some other good friends but they all thought i was joking which is good because as it turns out they are also homophobic, and not as accepting.



Well see the thing was I wasnt planning on telling my parents about that stuff till I was 18 but apparently "fate" or my incompetence to hide it decided to tell them for me. Well I hope they can maybe change there views someday but other than that not much else I can say. :/


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## JArt. (Apr 10, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> Well see the thing was I wasnt planning on telling my parents about that stuff till I was 18 but apparently "fate" or my incompetence to hide it decided to tell them for me. Well I hope they can maybe change there views someday but other than that not much else I can say. :/



They'll come around, i mean who else is going to take care of them when they're older. :V


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## Xeno (Apr 10, 2012)

Okay, may as well post this here. My coming out story was....Not really that fun. 
It was just a normal night, me in my room with my labtop. Earlier that day I told my mom that I wanted to talk to her, when my dad went to work of course. I told her this a few times before and she never came, so what would actually make her come this time.

She actually came....So she came in asking me what I wanted to talk about, I kept saying no and that it was nothing. She wouldn't stop asking me what I wanted to talk about. So I told her I'll call my friend and ask him to tell her for me, because I don't have the balls to do it myself.
So as I was walking down the stairs to our basement to get the phone, I started whispering to myself "What am I doing, what if everything goes wrong"

After she was done talking to my friend, she was like "Oh okay, you're still my son and I'll accept you for who you are." Yeah that didn't last very long. She called my grandma went to the bathroom and started crying, saying that she was a bad mother and it was all her fault. 

After she was done crying she went into rage mode. She started yelling at me from the living room telling me that I was going to hell and that she wishes she could send me to Arizona and live with my biological father. 

After we were done yelling at each other she came into my room and found out that I was with a guy...Great...She pretty much bitched him out and called him a creep. While she was doing that I was in my bathroom that's connected to my room, pretty much not able to stand up. I'm not sure what really happened I just couldn't stand, maybe it was just shock or nerves or something I dunno. Hell even my therapist said that she doesn't blame me for wanting to kill myself in the situation I was in.

I'm glad I had my friend told them though...They didn't react the way I thought but, oh well.


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## Dragonfurry (Apr 10, 2012)

Mike the fox said:


> Okay, may as well post this here. My coming out story was....Not really that fun. I'll put things I was thinking in * or something >.<
> It was just a normal night, me in my room with my labtop. Earlier that day I told my mom that I wanted to talk to her, when my dad went to work of course. I told her this a few times before and she never came, so what would actually make her come this time.
> 
> She actually came....So she came in asking me what I wanted to talk about, I kept saying no and that it was nothing. She wouldn't stop asking me what I wanted to talk about. So I told her I'll call my friend and ask him to tell her for me, because I don't have the balls to do it myself.
> ...



Wow. I am sorry but your mother is a manipulative mother. Lying straight to your face then freaking out about it like its something that is her fault? I hope things get better for you man.


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## JArt. (Apr 10, 2012)

@Mike the Fox, thats the reaction i would expect from my old fashoined, "gays/bisexuals are going to hell" parents.


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## The Wolf (Apr 19, 2012)

The story of my coming out isn't all that exciting I guess; certainly not when compared to some others I've heard and read.  In any case, here goes. Sit back, I remember it very vividly so this will be a long story.


My parents were the first to find out that I am gay and, being fundamentalist christians, they were (and I still are) very disapproving of it.

  I was on the phone with my boyfriend one night, we had talked since midnight and by this point is was around 2:30 in the morning.  I was sitting in the corner of my bedroom with my back to the wall and the room door shut and locked.  I had just told him I loved him when someone knocked on my door quite loudly. I think I panicked for a few seconds when I realized I couldn't really get out of this, and hastily told my boyfriend that I think I was caught. He gasped softly in apprehension  and told me he loved me very much and he would get off the phone so  whoever it was wouldn't pick it up and yell at him or anything. (This actually happened very quickly. It takes much longer to type and read than it did  to happen)

  So he hung up and I dropped my phone onto the floor and went to see who had knocked. I unlocked my door and opened it to find my mother standing there, regarding me with a very sharp look. She immediately demanded to know who I had said â€œI love youâ€ to, and I couldn't very well hide it anymore.  I was at this point at the verge of tears, and began to cry and leaned on my bed.  She came into the room and sat down, and after I found my tongue again I managed to stammer out that I had been talking to my boyfriend.

  She was taken very aback by this, asked me directly if I was trying to tell her that I was gay, and when I said yes she became quiet for a little while.  Eventually she told me she still loved me as her son no matter what and left, telling me to get some sleep since it was so late.  My father had by this time been awakened by my sobbing during all of this but my mother took him back to their bedroom and didn't bother me again that night. I assume she told him all of it after they went out of sight.

  Once I had recovered my composure enough to talk coherently, I called my boyfriend back and told him what had happened. He was shaken as well, and was very supportive and told me that everything would probably be ok.

  It wasn't, and it soon became abundantly clear to me that they disapproved highly.

  The next day they barely said anything to me at all until that evening, when my father came into my room and talked to me for a long while.

  He asked why I felt like I was gay, I told him that it was because I was strongly attracted to guys and not at all to girls, and that I was very much in love with my boyfriend.  He tried to convince me that I was not gay until I had slept with a guy, I explained that there is a difference between orientation and behavior. He only acknowledged this when I found a dictionary and showed him that homosexuality does not necessitate sex, and that the attraction is what  defines it. He dropped that topic, saying that he still wouldn't think I  was gay until I had sex with another guy.

  He said he believed being gay was wrong (which I expected since, like I mentioned earlier, I know both of my parents are hardcore fundamentalist christians) and that I should consult a member of the church, and rather than tell him I identify as an agnostic and spawn another storm, I asked him why he believed it was wrong. He answered that it was wrong because god says so, and at that point, since I knew any attempt to convince him otherwise would be fruitless, I dropped it.

  They scheduled an appointment for me with a councilor, and I saw him several times over the next two months.  He was very open about what concerns my parents had voiced when they asked for the appointment, and I learned that they thought I was anti-social (they confuse this term for asocial), and they had voiced a general â€œconcern that I thought I was gay.â€

  The councilor himself could plainly see that there was nothing wrong with me,and after a few sessions he told my parents that unless I wanted to continue to see him there really wasn't any reason for me to.

Fortunately, they never got violent or threatened to. The only actual moves they made were to threaten to cut off my phone plan in order to keep me from talking with him, as well as attempting to cut off my internet access several times for the same reason. They never actually cut my phone plan, but it added a lot of stress to the situation.

    Since then my parents have not said anything to me about it. It could be that they have readjusted their mindset to see that there was no problem with it, but I think given the myriad of times they have voiced intense contempt for homosexuals, and how often they have ridiculed both them and the idea of LGBT rights (â€œgays getting married would destroy the sacred institution of marriage because it isn't what god's plan is for marriageâ€, etc.), it is more likely that they simply deny that I am and avoid bringing up the subject so that they do not have to be reminded of the truth. I know they still oppose anything to do with LGBT rights, and even though they have not loudly ridiculed them as they used to I highly doubt their feelings have changed and that they still strongly disapprove of my being so.


So that's my story. Not terribly exciting I'm afraid, but oh well.


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## Spatel (Apr 19, 2012)

How old are you? I assume you're not in college yet from the way it sounds.


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## The Wolf (Apr 19, 2012)

18, in community college, one semester from my associate's and then transferring to a four year uni.


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## MattisVeneficus (May 23, 2012)

Is it considered necroing a thread if it's a stickey? I hope not.

Anyway, I come to post her because I have recently come to accept myself for who I really am. I am a bisexual and I no longer have a problem saying it. This is the first time that I've put it anywhere other than my thoughts about whether or not I am one. Whoever is the next to read this is literally the first person to know about this. I haven't come out to anybody yet and still am staying away from dating because of my age. 

Im just really glad that I have such an awesome place that I can tell people about this and not be worries about getting critisized. 

From the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for making this thread, and thank you to whoever is reading this right now. Thank you for allowing me to sleep tonight being sure of one more thing about myself.


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## Ariosto (May 23, 2012)

Dilldoughmcgee said:


> Is it considered necroing a thread if it's a stickey? I hope not.


Not that I know, and this thread is relatively active, as well.

I had the same realization recently, so I can relate. I don't think I'd have ever come to terms with it had it not been for these forums.


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## Saiko (May 23, 2012)

Ariosto said:


> I had the same realization recently, so I can relate. I don't think I'd have ever come to terms with it had it not been for these forums.


Same here. This thread answered a lot of questions for me and just generally made things a lot easier. In fact it's what got me hooked on FAF as my first post was here. lol


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## Bipolar Bear (May 23, 2012)

Mike the fox said:


> Okay, may as well post this here. My coming out story was....Not really that fun.
> It was just a normal night, me in my room with my labtop. Earlier that day I told my mom that I wanted to talk to her, when my dad went to work of course. I told her this a few times before and she never came, so what would actually make her come this time.
> 
> She actually came....So she came in asking me what I wanted to talk about, I kept saying no and that it was nothing. She wouldn't stop asking me what I wanted to talk about. So I told her I'll call my friend and ask him to tell her for me, because I don't have the balls to do it myself.
> ...



Jesus...

My heart goes out to you, Mike. It really does. Being Gay isn't easy, but telling your parents about it is even harder. Hell, I couldn't even tell my parents. They had to find out the hard way, and walked in on me and another guy cuddling in bed. (=/


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## Saiko (May 23, 2012)

It hurts when your mom calls your "problem" unnatural...

._.


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## Mullerornis (May 26, 2012)

I may be called insensitive, but to hell with it.

I never had that much of a problem coming out, not because of my parents being accepting (which they were, although painfully dumb about it), but because I am pretty much not giving a fuck about what people think about my sexuality. Hate me? Great, I'll be a martyr.


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## Namba (May 26, 2012)

Dad? Dad? I have something to tell y'all... I'm straight.


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## Dragonfurry (May 26, 2012)

Quick update on my life:

So for I think 4 months me and my boyfriend have been going out. Great and we have never been better.

Though I will say when my mom found out about me dating a guy she didnt really say anything at the time. But late when I talked to her about it she said it "isnt meant to be that way" and "its not what god wants".
Well mom who are you to tell me who I can and cant love? Do you expect me to just break up with him to sastify your catholic beliefs? Fuck you this is my life and I dont need you telling me its wrong and try to control me.


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## Mullerornis (May 26, 2012)

@Dragonfurry That's the spirit


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## Bipolar Bear (May 27, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> *Do you expect me to just break up with him  to sastify your catholic beliefs? Fuck you this is my life and I dont  need you telling me its wrong and try to control me.*



Looks like I've got a new sig quote...


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## Reito (May 28, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> Quick update on my life:
> 
> So for I think 4 months me and my boyfriend have been going out. Great and we have never been better.
> 
> ...



They bring up Leviticus, you bring up "God made all his children in his image"

Works 10/10 times


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## CaptainCool (May 28, 2012)

Reito said:


> They bring up Leviticus, you bring up "God made all his children in his image"
> 
> Works 10/10 times



or that levictus also said that you cant eat shellfish. or masturbate. and yet we are all doing that today.
people really need to learn that the bible is a pile of flaming crap. not to mention how retarded it is to believe in a magic super wizzard from outer space...

also (for the sake of the argument lets assume that god does exist), who is your mom to say what god wants? who does she think she is doing the job of god and judge people like that? last time i checked the bible also said "Thou Shalt Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself!". or is that only true if your neighbor is "an honest christian" as well? but even then, as far as i know jesus is the one who is supposed to do the judging and we are just supposed to love and understand each other...

you know like this:
http://www.atheistmemebase.com/wp-c...Did-I-stutter-christians-homophobia-jesus.jpg

edit:
there is simply no evidence at all that homosexuality is wrong or evil.
"duhhh, its unatural so you arent supposed to be doing that!" yeah, well cars are not natural as well. and we all use them today.
GOD ITSELF is not part of nature. does that mean god is evil as well?


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## Schwimmwagen (May 28, 2012)

Also I heard somewhere that acting as if you pass off your words as if they were god's or you judge another person and act as if you know their fates are two of the greatest acts of pride, therefore it is a sin, and it is considered the deadliest of the seven.

I just love the bible. Everything in it contradicts everything everyone does, good christian or not.


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## CaptainCool (May 28, 2012)

Gibby said:


> Also I heard somewhere that acting as if you pass off your words as if they were god's or you judge another person and act as if you know their fates are two of the greatest acts of pride, therefore it is a sin, and it is considered the deadliest of the seven.
> 
> I just love the bible. Everything in it contradicts everything everyone does, good christian or not.



yup! the wholde darn thing makes no sense at all. and yet people dont dare to question it and continue to harass those who dont believe in it and those who are portrayed as evil by their cute little holy book.
it is disgusting...
there ARE christians out there who do it as the bible says and dont judge or hate anyone but lets be serious here, those who do spread their bigotry are the reason why gay marriage is STILL such a huge issue for politicians.
"well, its the opinion of the people that gays shouldnt get married!". but they completely ignore that this opinion isnt based on any evidence at all. and therefore that opinion is completely irrelevant!
there is no reason at all that gays shouldnt allowed to get married.
if anything, they EARNED the right to get married!

lets face it, how many straight marriages are getting divorced within the first 10 years after they got married? this "holy ritual" isnt holy anymore at all!
and gay people are actually fighting for it! they wont get divorced, they have been living together for years, stuggeling to get accepted. those couples will stay together and yet they arent allowed to get married... it makes no sense at all!


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## Arik~Vulpes (May 28, 2012)

I'm not gay, let's get that out of the way. I do however support those who are. Hell, I've even had a few friends of mine in high school who were gay. I'm totally cool with it. My heart goes out to those who are gay and are having problems (ie. parents). Fight on for what you believe in.


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## CaptainCool (May 28, 2012)

Arik~Vulpes said:


> I'm not gay, let's get that out of the way. I do however support those who are. Hell, I've even had a few friends of mine in high school who were gay. I'm totally cool with it. My heart goes out to those who are gay and are having problems (ie. parents). Fight on for what you believe in.



this doesnt really have to do anything with belief though^^ you are either gay or you arent, its dictated by nature.
and i think this makes the whole thing even worse. how can the part of the nature of a person that dictates their mating behavior towards other consenting adults be evil or unethical?


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## Arik~Vulpes (May 28, 2012)

CaptainCool said:


> this doesnt really have to do anything with belief though^^ you are either gay or you arent, its dictated by nature.
> and i think this makes the whole thing even worse. how can the part of the nature of a person that dictates their mating behavior towards other consenting adults be evil or unethical?



It souldn't make them evil, they're still a person. If a person is attracted towards another male/woman then they should. It's the way they are and nothing can change it. People who are not tolerant should just accept the way those people are and deal with it.


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## CaptainCool (May 28, 2012)

Arik~Vulpes said:


> It souldn't make them evil, they're still a person. If a person is attracted towards another male/woman then they should. It's the way they are and nothing can change it. People who are not tolerant should just accept the way those people are and deal with it.



but apparently they cant deal with it :T a bunch of selfentitled douchebags who desperately try to push their views on others...


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## Arik~Vulpes (May 28, 2012)

CaptainCool said:


> a bunch of selfentitled douchebags who desperately try to push their views on others...


That's why I hate people.


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## MattisVeneficus (May 29, 2012)

Dragonfurry said:


> Quick update on my life:
> 
> So for I think 4 months me and my boyfriend have been going out. Great and we have never been better.
> 
> ...


Say, "Mom, bring me a Bible."
Open to 1 Timothy 2:12 and read it aloud. It says right in the Bible, "I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; *she must keep quiet*."
Close the Bible and ask her to think about what she had just said and walk away.


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## CaptainCool (May 29, 2012)

Dilldoughmcgee said:


> Say, "Mom, bring me a Bible."
> Open to 1 Timothy 2:12 and read it aloud. It says right in the Bible, "I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; *she must keep quiet*."
> Close the Bible and ask her to think about what she had just said and walk away.



no, he should send her out to fetch him a sandwich instead! because thats what god would want :V


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## Evan of Phrygia (May 29, 2012)

I think as of now, I'm out.

I feel like sexuality is so open that it doesn't matter anymore.

Only the people that should care know.

I'm so glad that it's not a potential problem anymore; I'm out, I guess.

C:


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## Saiko (May 29, 2012)

This is Tides said:


> I think as of now, I'm out.
> 
> I feel like sexuality is so open that it doesn't matter anymore.
> 
> ...


Who'd you come out to? : DDD


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## Mullerornis (May 31, 2012)

Ah, the Bible "arguments".

Just tell them that their cult is based on a mistranslation of "Ego eimi oh on", and they are reduced to gibbering, insulting messes.


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## Saiko (May 31, 2012)

Mullerornis said:


> Ah, the Bible "arguments".
> 
> Just tell them that their cult is based on a mistranslation of "Ego eimi oh on", and they are reduced to gibbering, insulting messes.


Easy for you to say. Â¬.Â¬


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## Spatel (May 31, 2012)

This is Tides said:


> I feel like sexuality is so open that it doesn't matter anymore.



Around some people that's the attitude. Around my friends, and around furries of course that's the attitude. Around older generations it isn't though.


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## Shy husky (Jun 6, 2012)

Coming out of the closet its kind of scary because you don't  know what the person's reaction is going to be, I have told my older brother and I have known him my whole life, he sort if knew that I was bi, but I'm scared to tell my parents and my friends


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## MattisVeneficus (Jun 6, 2012)

Shy husky said:


> Coming out of the closet its kind of scary because you don't  know what the person's reaction is going to be, I have told my older brother and I have known him my whole life, he sort if knew that I was bi, but I'm scared to tell my parents and my friends


I haven't told anyone except some people online. I'm scared to to anyone IRL and have yet to.


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## Greg (Jun 6, 2012)

I wish I was as unlucky as you guys. At least then I could relate. My mum knows I'm a sexually open mostly gay furry delphinophile but doesn't care. She just wants me to be happy.


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## BRN (Jun 6, 2012)

egregrious said:


> I wish I was as unlucky as you guys. At least then I could relate. My mum knows I'm a sexually open mostly gay furry delphinophile but doesn't care. She just wants me to be happy.


 Family's the scariest. My aunt, from up north, actually didn't even blink an eyelid when I said I'm into guys; my mom flipped shit and drank herself through the night. Guess it goes to show how much geography changes opinions.


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## MattisVeneficus (Jun 6, 2012)

I'm trying to think who in my life would be the hardest to tell so I can tell them last.


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## Shy husky (Jun 6, 2012)

MattisVeneficus said:


> I'm trying to think who in my life would be the hardest to tell so I can tell them last.



I can agree with you on that its easier if you start with people who you think will understand ya


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## Hinalle K. (Jun 7, 2012)

MattisVeneficus said:


> I'm trying to think who in my life would be the hardest to tell so I can tell them last.


The father?


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## Shy husky (Jun 7, 2012)

It would depend on how your father feels and acts about gays, lets say he dosen't really minds about you being gay or something else then go for it but if he hates gays then don't try it until your sure if you think its safe at least in my opinion


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## Hinalle K. (Jun 7, 2012)

Shy husky said:


> It would depend on how your father feels and acts about gays, lets say he dosen't really minds about you being gay or something else then go for it but if he hates gays then don't try it until your sure if you think its safe at least in my opinion


The father is usually the most troublesome one to come out to, I'd guess.


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## Spatel (Jun 7, 2012)

I would imagine grandparents are generally worse about it than parents. And my mother was worse than my father, so it's hard for me to judge the percentages for that.


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## Greg (Jun 7, 2012)

totes. my grandma's anglican and my grandad's catholic so when they found i roll both ways it was a big shock to them. luckily they were always more upset over me being an atheist.

the worst so far is the mother-in-law. bitch is anti everything about me.


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## Ariosto (Jun 7, 2012)

I came out to both my parents as bi in different moments. They:
-Think I'm confused.
-Think I read too much.
-Mom thinks it's because of a (non-existent) trauma left by a girl that rejected me once. Somehow, she's convinced I still like her, even though it was just a shallow crush and I haven't seen her in years -_-
-Are still imbued in traditional gender roles and keep sustaining that (IN THEIR OPINION) reproduction is the ultimate consumation of any relationship. No wonder they don't approve of gay adoption.

Of course, my recall of how I got to that conclusion only included literary examples and meeting actual non-hetero people in college, as well as giving hints to me finding Robert Downey Junior and hairy men hot. Of course, it didn't include the fact I've been watching gay porn for years or the time I've spent in these forums. And since they think I'm just confused, I can leave it at that. 
Something that dad said called my attention, though. Must homosexual relationships always be put in terms of "active" and "passive"? In my little bubble where avoiding penetrative sex still may lead to a healthy relationship it's possible not to, but is it in reality? What are the roles that "activeness" and "passiveness" imply sentimentally and sexually (beyond "I'm on top and you're below")? Is it even productive to think of them only in that way?


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## BRN (Jun 7, 2012)

Ariosto said:


> Something that dad said called my attention, though. Must homosexual relationships always be put in terms of "active" and "passive"? In my little bubble where avoiding penetrative sex still may lead to a healthy relationship it's possible not to, but is it in reality? What are the roles that "activeness" and "passiveness" imply sentimentally and sexually (beyond "I'm on top and you're below")? Is it even productive to think of them only in that way?


I think your dad might be in the "them, and us" mentality that 'seperates' heterosexual couples from homosexual couples. Projecting "types" of relationship onto "types" of people really won't get you anywhere apart from achieving merely a vague understanding; but at least, it helps towards resolving conscious tension.


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## Ariosto (Jun 7, 2012)

SIX said:


> I think your dad might be in the "them, and us" mentality that 'seperates' heterosexual couples from homosexual couples. Projecting "types" of relationship onto "types" of people really won't get you anywhere apart from achieving merely a vague understanding; but at least, it helps towards resolving conscious tension.


Yeah, that was my initial suppostition. Granted, he still has the "kids need feminine and masculine role models" mentality, so he probably applies the same to relationships in the form of "passive and active", respectively (and that's probably sexist, too). Same goes for mom, and no matter how much I ask them for studies that support this (they're both doctors and therefore must have some knowledge of physchology), they just avoid the explanation altogether.


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## BRN (Jun 7, 2012)

Ariosto said:


> Yeah, that was my initial suppostition. Granted, he still has the* "kids need feminine and masculine role models"* mentality, so he probably applies the same to relationships in the form of "passive and active", respectively (and that's probably sexist, too). Same goes for mom, and no matter how much I ask them for studies that support this (they're both doctors and therefore must have some knowledge of physchology), they just avoid the explanation altogether.


 Which is why we let single-parent families exist, eh... It's a shame how so much of the eldest generation's dogma has influenced our elder generation.


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## Ariosto (Jun 7, 2012)

SIX said:


> Which is why we let single-parent families exist, eh... It's a shame how so much of the eldest generation's dogma has influenced our elder generation.


The traditional definition of family excludes them, yes. Have people not thought single-parent children grow emotionally trouble because of society's expectations towards families and not because the parent does a bad job of taking care of him/her? That's why the nanny ends with the father in Hollywood movies, I guess. The same goes for adopted children and those born outside the nuclear family.


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## BRN (Jun 7, 2012)

Ariosto said:


> The traditional definition of family excludes them, yes. Have people not thought single-parent children grow emotionally trouble because of society's expectations towards families and not because the parent does a bad job of taking care of him/her? That's why the nanny ends with the father in Hollywood movies, I guess. The same goes for adopted children and those born outside the nuclear family.



 Really, I was trying to imply that children from single-parent families still grow well, despite not having a role model from both genders in their parent. I'm not really sure if there's any truth in the fact that children from single-parent families are more likely to be emotionally troubled - and, socio-economics might be more to blame, if they are. 

But it's my opinion that people are the sum of their experiences. Harsher social environments, the trauma of loss...


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## Ariosto (Jun 7, 2012)

SIX said:


> Really, I was trying to imply that children from single-parent families still grow well, despite not having a role model from each gender as parents. I'm not really sure if there's any truth in the fact that children from single-parent families are more likely to be emotionally troubled - and, socio-economics might be more to blame, if they are.
> 
> But it's my opinion that people are the sum of their experiences. Harsher social environments, the trauma of loss...


I was refering to the typical "lone child + single parent= recipe for difficulties" that seems so prevalent in people's minds. Oh, that's true, though I was putting the emphasis on what society sees as family and how it may cause trouble, hence why I included those other examples.

Thanks for the clarification about your point; misunderstanding and digression on my behalf, sorry.


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## BRN (Jun 7, 2012)

Ariosto said:


> I was refering to the typical "lone child + single parent= recipe for difficulties" that seems so prevalent in people's minds. Oh, that's true, though I was putting the emphasis on what society sees as family and how it may cause trouble, hence why I included those other examples.
> 
> Thanks for the clarification about your point; misunderstanding and digression on my behalf, sorry.



It's all good, no need to worry. :> 

But yeah... I think society would do a lot better if it restricted things, such as homosexual parenting, rather than just slamming them as illegal. Even the fact that we're still struggling for legal equality on sexuality is ridiculous. I'd hope to see more kids like this, though. 

[yt]FSQQK2Vuf9Q[/yt]


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## KigRatel (Jun 7, 2012)

I read threads like these and, to me, it gives the impression that most furries live in  ultra-conservative environments where everyone will hate them for  admitting to just about anything.


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## Greg (Jun 7, 2012)

KigRatel said:


> I read threads like these and, to me, it gives the impression that most furries live in  ultra-conservative environments where everyone will hate them for  admitting to just about anything.



people are bitches.


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## regit27 (Jun 7, 2012)

Okay, I just finished reading this all, and I have an opinion on a lot of the stuff I read, but I think it would be best to just do as the beggining of this thread said and tell my experience on the whole subject. First off though, let me say that I am a gay male because when reading a lot of these I got confused as to what gender the person who was typing was and what sexuality they were coming to terms with.

I was probably 10 or 11 when I started to figure it out, though like any confused kid I denied it as much as I could. I tried watching straight porn but just found myself looking at the dudes in it and not the chicks. It took about 3-4 years to just accept it, and in 10th grade it got a lot easier to accept as I found out about furries.

I am in the closet still, but for a different reason than when I started to discover my sexuality. As I live in California (the best country on earth) I'm not in a really bigoted environment and I don't think I really know anybody who hate gays, but maybe more like they are uncomfortable with it. I have thought about coming out to my parents but, I choose not to not because I don't want to feel rejected, but because I don't want them to feel bad about having a gay kid. I know, I know that probably sounded stupid to some of you, but I just figure if I were a parent, and I found that my kid was not normal (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/normal) I would feel a little disappointed. They spend half their lives on raising a child hoping for them to be the best kid ever, and not to dis gays, but they aren't exactly popular among straight adults. 

My parents aren't even devoutly christian or anything, but I know that me being gay would just make them uncomfortable, and I think it would just be wrong to make them less comfortable so that I can tell them that my sexuality is different from theres and the majority of society. It just seems unnecessary. I'm not out to any of my friends either because I don't want them to feel uncomfortable around me for any reason either.

I feel like I could have written this better to capture what I'm trying to say, but I'm just not that good with words sometimes. I hope that my view on the subject might help some people to see things from a different perspective, because I know that this subject is hard, but where I am right now I don't personally see a need to tell people I'm gay. It just seems selfish in my opinion, and if I felt the need to just open to someone, I would do it to some*one*, no need to burden everyone.


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## Shy husky (Jun 7, 2012)

Nice choice of words


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## Jashwa (Jun 7, 2012)

KigRatel said:


> I read threads like these and, to me, it gives the impression that most furries live in  ultra-conservative environments where everyone will hate them for  admitting to just about anything.


Most furries live in America. This is true.


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## Amador_Reuki (Jun 9, 2012)

I honestly don't have issues with coming out at all. if they want to know they can ask and I'll tell them.


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## BusiSussie (Jun 12, 2012)

*how do you do*

you are best!


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## Draca-Domini_LVI (Jun 13, 2012)

G-day. 
Ok guys and girls, first time post. Feel free to be blunt if you care enough to reply. (as subtlety through the written word doesnâ€™t work too well for me ).

  Before I start I wish to thank those that have taken time to share their experiences and try to help others through these posts, (it would have my 'coming out' experience a lot easier, though all of the results would have been the same, but whatever thatâ€™s just my insecurities getting the better of me.) That being said this has helped me heaps, to the extent that I finally told the person that I was most scared of telling [my godmother {and mother of six years}] , without hesitation, {it actually went really well}, (PS. Sorry for the brackets, brain is working faster then fingers). One last side note before I begin, screw stereotypes.....

  As you should have well guessed by now, yes I am a gay male of 22 years. (there's got to be a less clunky way to say that... and now Iâ€™m  procrastinating more by saying this... sue me!), and here is where the stereotype starts to break down, I was probably the last person to know, to the extent that if I'm honest with myself I was somewhat homophobic. Don't get me wrong, I never thought being gay was wrong I actually admired people who could admit to being homosexual, I was just frightened when other guys hit on me, it made me feel uncomfortable and a little confused. Right through school, I was a loner, I only had a few of friends, (mostly girls), but my first 'interest' (I was oblivious that I liked him in that way until later) I think I hurt really badly. We met at school when we were about 12, as time went on we went to different high schools and I started to realise that he might have interest in me, when he would ride to my place on his BMX ( about 15 kilometres away [ 9.3 miles, for you guys in the US ]), just to see me for an hour or so. After a while he would ask if I wanted to... lets just go with experiment {yes I realise that this doesnâ€™t mean that he was gay, there were other hints as well, but he never said he was. idk}, anyway it ended with me saying that if he was â€œgoing to continue down this path, not to bother coming backâ€..... so he didn't, so this is my first piece of advice for those who care to take it, keep an open mind, don't burn your bridges and remember that feelings are fickle, your situation might change.....

  So, why did it take me so long to realise I was gay? In a single word, Ignorance. Ignorance of my self and I was subconsciously believing stereotypes. While I believed I was straight, I was constantly telling myself that I couldnâ€™t be gay, because I didn't fit the only two stereotypes of the gay community that I knew, â€œthe princessâ€ and â€œthe aggressiveâ€,  these are shallow, but I knew of nothing different. I'm (by most accounts) a quiet, blunt, logical, loner, that enjoys and is in a metal band, I _work at an abattoir (_I can see copping a lot of crap for this,but look people need food and I needed a job, I working to amend this as tomorrow is my last day thank God) oh... and while Iâ€™m on that topic I'm a Christian.... Except for work, these things  are fundamental parts of my being, none of these stereotypically scream(ed) gay to me, therefore I had to be straight right? Advice 2, to those who care, life is not a mathematical equation, you can't plug  fundamentles in and expect to get a straight answer..... (sorry about  the pun... ok not really ).

  I actually started to realise my sexual orientation when I discovered the fury community (not as helpful as it sounds, sorry guys), when I started to look at less of the M/F and more (to nothing but) the M/M, that was my first real indication, then when I realised maybe this wasn't just role-playing and imagination I enjoyed, then I 'tried' to â€¦.... (fill in blanks PG13 thread remember?... maybe not so much PG but anyway...), with a girl I liked for, 1 Â½h with no result (and I mean NO result :s [don't have that issue now I know Iâ€™m gay ]). *Thatâ€™s* when I realised, â€œI might not be so straight after allâ€. Then one day It finally clicked, A relationship between me and a female would probably never work, and as much as I didn't want to imperfectly label it, it probably came down to one thing, Empathy. I don't keep any mags or vids (as sex or the body on it's own doesnâ€™t do it for me), I do enjoy the adult fury stuff, (and no it's not the only fury stuff I enjoy... settle down, it's the wrong thread to get into that here) but that's about it. It's about what I like physically and wanting and being able to give the person I (will come to) love and understand what I like, and he much the same with me. And while I know there is ways around this I don't think I could or should (nor any one else for me) change this, when it's not what I really desire, and (obvious statement is obvious ), *I'm not a girl!*. While there are females I love, they (you, if your are a female reading this). Are just too foreign for me to understand in that way, call it a fault if you will but Iâ€™m content with this, and I am overjoyed that there are guys out there that may want me because I am a guy as well.  

  The last time that the stereotype is broken is when I 'came out', I told some friends first, this was greeted with the expected gay jokes and mild surprise (one of the friends was the girl I 'tried' with which was amusing ) and most of them didn't pick it. My family on the other hand (mother, stepfather and uncle), gave me the â€œ.... yeah, and?â€ response {they suspected as much since I was about 10}, â€¦. sorry I lie my Uncle replied with â€œ,about f&#%ing time junior!â€ and couldn't stop laughing at me for it take me so long to figure it out. My godparents suspected as much and are just happy that I told them, but the best response I got was from little sister (she is 19 to avoid any confusion), she provided total indifference, (as long as I don't try and steal her boyfriend, I'm still her loving big brother. ).

  So that's pretty much it , My final piece of advice to any and all who are dealing with the possibility of weather or not you are gay/bi and anything else, is that the only person that _*needs*_ to know is *you*. Weather you decide that you need the people around you to know, only the people who care about you need to know or  you think your telling them is something you don't wish to 'put them through' (for lack of better words). At least deicide it for your self, denying part of who you are will only lead to frustration, and lost opportunities.  

   My condolences to those that are doing it tough ( I honestly wish I could offer more), many out there sympathise, some out there empathise, just believe a few out there love you and one may want your love in return. Hold on for that day.


   Best wishes to you all.

  -Draca-Domini_LVI-


P.S. Sorry about the length of this post, as it was my first so Iâ€™d thought I'd cover all the baces.


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## Bipolar Bear (Jun 13, 2012)

(0____0)

That text font...


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## Yago (Jun 13, 2012)

Draca-Domini_LVI said:


> stuff



Yeah, seriously, fix your post formatting. I put it into Micrsoft word and changed it to twelve point Times New Roman, and it's STILL formatted so annoyingly I don't even want to read it. 

And I usually want to read everything.


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## Draca-Domini_LVI (Jun 13, 2012)

Yago said:


> Yeah, seriously, fix your post formatting. I put it into Micrsoft word and changed it to twelve point Times New Roman, and it's STILL formatted so annoyingly I don't even want to read it.
> 
> And I usually want to read everything.




Apoligies, I'll get to fixing it now.

Note: Changed, I wont screw around with font and size in the future, as i still can't tell what the default is.......... :/


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## Yago (Jun 13, 2012)

Draca-Domini_LVI said:


> Apoligies, I'll get to fixing it now.



Well it's not a problem, but most the people around here on FAF don't like alternate post formats. I don't mind, if they're readable-- you know, with spaces and paragraphs and things.

Writing things out in one line chunks is equally annoying as a hard to read small font, like yours. 

Your post contains both :\.


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## BRN (Jun 14, 2012)

Draco, sounds like it was a long road of learning. Congrats on working it all out! It's a shame it can take so much good and also bad experience to disillusion us when we believe something.


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## 0rreo (Jun 14, 2012)

Since I'm still in the closet and I don't think I'll ever come completely out, I'll just post my realization of my gayness. Ok, I think it started when I was in elementary school, about 5th grade. There was this boy who I went to aftercare with, he was maybe a little shorter than me, curly hair, a really nice person to be around, and we become fast friends. Eventually, this friendship led to us have a sleepover at my house. We did some "stuff" and had a great time, not knowing anything about homosexuality. I personally had always known that I liked males, but I didn't know what gay was until about middle school. That's where the taunting began, but I'd rather not talk about that so I'll skip ahead to high school.

When I got to high school, I joined my band and made a few friends in my section, while still trying to keep a good distance from them so they wouldn't find out. But then, stuff happened, and I wound up telling one girl who plays the instrument that I do now that I was gay. She was fine with it considering she had a lot of gay friends, and I felt a lot more comfortable around her afterwards. That was in ninth grade. In tenth grade, I had told this one girl that I had always known to be my friend, even during the middle school taunting days. She was shocked because whenever she asked me who I liked I would always tell her that I was asexual, which made sense given my personality. 

But even after telling those two people, part of me wants to be more open about my sexuality, but another part of me doesn't. It's like, sometimes I feel that I can only truly be myself if I came out, but that other side is telling me to keep it in and share it only with a select few people since it wouldn't matter to complete strangers anyway. Maybe I'll just go with the latter side; I've only told two people so far and I'm perfectly fine with that. I want to tell more people, but those people share the same familiarity to me as the first two people so it wouldn't really be stepping out of the box. There's also that issue of the anti-gays, both religious-extremist or just downright ignorant, so my closet provides a safe haven from them, while at the same time keeping the doors open to the people who I trust.


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## Criminal Scum (Jun 17, 2012)

You don't have to be open, you just don't have to be 'closed.'

Also, "anti-gay, religious-extremist, or just downright ignorant," was redundant :V

As for me, I almost came out to my brother today. I should have just done it. Damn it.


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## MattisVeneficus (Jun 17, 2012)

Why is the closet so dark and scary? ;_;

My parents aren't anti-gay, but my brother is. I don't know how they'd react to it, though. Same goes for my friends, but they are still going to be much easier to tell.


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## Seian Verian (Jun 17, 2012)

...I have no idea what I could contribute to this thread. I've never really had problems with it... I just sort of transitioned over time from asexual to bisexual, and when I finally realized I had, I didn't have much problem with it. And... By that point, was in an environment that also didn't have any problem with it. So I'm honestly fairly casual about my sexuality, though I don't shove it in people's faces.

Good luck to all those that aren't so lucky though! I know not everyone can be so accepting as the people I've managed to be with recently...


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## Mullerornis (Jun 17, 2012)

> But even after telling those two people, part of me wants to be more  open about my sexuality, but another part of me doesn't. It's like,  sometimes I feel that I can only truly be myself if I came out, but that  other side is telling me to keep it in and share it only with a select  few people since it wouldn't matter to complete strangers anyway. Maybe  I'll just go with the latter side; I've only told two people so far and  I'm perfectly fine with that. I want to tell more people, but those  people share the same familiarity to me as the first two people so it  wouldn't really be stepping out of the box. There's also that issue of  the anti-gays, both religious-extremist or just downright ignorant, so  my closet provides a safe haven from them, while at the same time  keeping the doors open to the people who I trust



I don't want to sound like the male bisexual version of a femnazi, but I think you're doing it wrong.

While a safe haven is nice, as an ideological standpoint it is only letting ignorant win. Now, I'm not saying to be a retard and go tell everyone, but to adopt a more relaxed position. Don't go around bothering others, but don't be in the closet either.


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## Ariosto (Jun 28, 2012)

And I'm back here sooner than I had expected. It does feel... longer than it is, though.

Coming out didn't go well, at all. Mom made it blatantly clear she's not okay with it, and dad is full of fears about homosexuality. Either way, neither wants a bisexual or... aheem, effeminate (I can't find any other word that describes their line of thought) son. 
Both saw it as a problem, mom in her life plans for me (really, mom, if I don't have a family it'll only be to oppose you and only you), dad has a similar train of thought: 
"Mannerisms are associated with passive homosexuality, what message are you trying to give?".
"Minorities love feeling discriminated because it gives them power".
"That you empathize with minorities doesn't mean you have to be part of one".
"You're a man".
"Who were the first people affected during the initial AIDS outbreak?".
"An homosexual man sees you doing that (meaning, those mannerisms) and says 'I can have this one'".

Connect the dots...
The problem is he actually believes in his words and sees me having homosexual thoughts as something that could hamper me. You may say you're not an homophobe, dad, but you're still very much opposed to homosexuality and afraid of it.
During the course of that conversation, I made it clear I didn't mind homosexual men approaching me at all troubling (never admitted directly to liking, though, but that's also because I don't mind girls much either), at which point he told me he had been talking with mom and said he thought college was the problem and was planning to take me out of it if it was necessary, putting me in one that I can pretty much guarantee to be inferior (I'm sure of it). What is your logic, dad? Which will harm your son's education more? Taking him to a worse college or him adopting mannerisms? 
At this point I began to cry and told me about this forum (no name was dropped) and that I got into a relationship with someone here and he was a guy. Of course, that only made matters worse... except not.

Psychologist, friend of the family, eager to help. And because I'm such a good liar and still a teenager, we simply left it at depression due to the previous semester's circumstances and I'm under medication now. We're not done with him, though, and there are still more appointments. Dad's more relaxed now, and considering a travel to Europe is awaiting him and mom and he still hasn't filled all the papers in, he has plenty of things to think about. Plus, I told him I hadn't written to this person in a long time, so he's probably less worried about it.

On one hand, I can see why Dad was so worried (online, this bisexuality came practically out of nowhere to them), but that mannerisms could disturb him so much bothers me, and I'm not entirely comfortable with the situation.

And of course, discretion is suit to follow on this matter. No more mannerisms when they're at home, as well as no browsing here under those same circumstances.


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## rafacarrilho (Jul 7, 2012)

Came out of the closet to my friends and mom about 2 months ago, had to translate a letter in 3 languages and send to everyone would understand it, everybody was shocked but very supportive


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## Indigo-Mew (Jul 8, 2012)

I came out to my parents first thing (apparently that is not a good idea), they were cool with it. then I told one of my best friends which went well. I don't want to come out to anyone else even though i know they will be very accepting and it will be something off my back (making me happy round people). I will just do when i feel happy too! ^^

Oh and i did say on a job application form (it was a tick box thing) after debating it for a while, It was a bit weird for me.


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 13, 2012)

-trent-;2976158
Oh and i did say on a job application form (it was a tick box thing) after debating it for a while said:
			
		

> Wait ... wha?  Job application forms have tick boxes for Orientation?!    I think that's illegal to put on Canadian job application forms, but I could be wrong about that.  Wow ... UK certainly is different from over here.
> 
> Good job on a successful Coming Out
> 
> ...


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## Corwin Cross (Jul 16, 2012)

Heh... I was kinda out-ed as bisexual and a furry, when my mom decided to find out why I've been a paranoid fucktard for the better part of 4 years... And looked up my texts, my diary, my artwork, my...everything. It was incredibly awkward... But they're supportive. About everything except the 'furry' part. Thus is why I haven't been here in forever.


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## Fallowfox (Jul 16, 2012)

I tried dipping my toe in the water by telling my parents one of my  friends was gay. They concluded that 'he was just going through a phase,'  So  whilst I can't imagine my parents being anything but accepting about it I  don't know if they'd actually believe me if I _did_ tell them, and resolve it as me just trying to be different.


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 16, 2012)

Corwin Cross said:


> Heh... I was kinda out-ed as bisexual and a furry, when my mom decided to find out why I've been a paranoid fucktard for the better part of 4 years... And looked up my texts, my diary, my artwork, my...everything. It was incredibly awkward... But they're supportive. About everything except the 'furry' part. Thus is why I haven't been here in forever.




Corwin, I am so happy to hear that your parents are supportive towards your bisexuality.  As for the Furry part, it's really just a hobby, and they should view it as such.  It's like a group of people speaking Klingon to one another and attending Star Trek conventions and participating in various Star Trek related activities.  Being Furry is fun tho and helps one get through life, just like books and music.  So long as your parents can understand that aspect of Furry, they should be fine with it.  Focus on the most important part, they accept you for who you are, the way that you are.


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 16, 2012)

Fallowfox said:


> I tried dipping my toe in the water by telling my parents one of my  friends was gay. They concluded that 'he was just going through a phase,'  So  whilst I can't imagine my parents being anything but accepting about it I  don't know if they'd actually believe me if I _did_ tell them, and resolve it as me just trying to be different.



FallowFox, that's a good way to test the waters for sure.  I don't understand why people consider being gay a phase.  They are just plain ignorant, meaning, they don't have the knowledge they need to be able to fully understand the situation.  Hopefully in time, they may gain that knowledge and in turn, accept you.  Maybe acquire some pamplets or library books, and leave 'em on the table for them to stumble upon.  When they approach the subject, you can do the friend situation again, how it's not a phase and you support your friend whole-heartedly.  The least the parents can do is accept your words and views, read up on the subject, and when they become more understanding, then let them know about you and how long you've known.

Of course, I don't know your parents, as everyone's parents are different.  But I do know knowledge is a powerful tool.  Best of luck to you.


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## Spatel (Jul 16, 2012)

Yeah I tried the same system. Told my mother the last girl I dated was bisexual, just to gauge her response. "Eww, gross. How could you trust her? Weren't you afraid she would cheat on you with a woman?" .... heh that was two years ago. Suffice it to say the part where I told her I also was didn't go well, at least at first. She was not nice. Gave me the whole 'it's a choice' spiel. I was actually very conflicted at the time, because being pretty much completely 50-50 myself... my behavior at least _does_ kinda seem like a choice. I could've chosen to date women. I don't benefit as much from the "born this way" argument, because even if this is all I have ever known, men are not a necessity for me like they would be if I were gay. They become a luxury if you're bi. So the defense for this lifestyle is more complicated to explain.

I didn't have the best response planned, but I went for the "consenting adults should be able to do whatever if it doesn't hurt anyone" angle. Which is a better argument anyway. 

She's had a year to sit on it and improve and she's pretty cool about it now. Now she lives off of every detail I give her about my boyfriend.

Also, on that note, hai guys *MY BOYFRIEND*



			
				WarLegalomon said:
			
		

> Corwin, I am so happy to hear that your parents are supportive towards  your bisexuality.  As for the Furry part, it's really just a hobby, and  they should view it as such.  It's like a group of people speaking  Klingon to one another and attending Star Trek conventions and  participating in various Star Trek related activities.  Being Furry is  fun tho and helps one get through life, just like books and music.  So  long as your parents can understand that aspect of Furry, they should be  fine with it.  Focus on the most important part, they accept you for  who you are, the way that you are.



The problem with that defense is what if his parents think it's a pathetic hobby for an adult to have, and don't want him doing it?


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## RedFoxTwo (Jul 16, 2012)

Ah, so _this_ is the thread where everyone's been accumulating these ridiculous post counts.


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 16, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Yeah I tried the same system. Told my mother the last girl I dated was bisexual, just to gauge her response. "Eww, gross. How could you trust her? Weren't you afraid she would cheat on you with a woman?" .... heh that was two years ago. Suffice it to say the part where I told her I also was didn't go well, at least at first. She was not nice. Gave me the whole 'it's a choice' spiel. I was actually very conflicted at the time, because being pretty much completely 50-50 myself... my behavior at least _does_ kinda seem like a choice. I could've chosen to date women. I don't benefit as much from the "born this way" argument, because even if this is all I have ever known, men are not a necessity for me like they would be if I were gay. They become a luxury if you're bi. So the defense for this lifestyle is more complicated to explain.
> 
> I didn't have the best response planned, but I went for the "consenting adults should be able to do whatever if it doesn't hurt anyone" angle. Which is a better argument anyway.
> 
> ...




True, but then again, a lot of parents heavily frown on Video Games and Star Trek conventions.  *shrugs*


I really like what you said here:
"consenting adults should be able to do whatever if it doesn't hurt anyone" 

This is so true.  Adults are entitled to do whatever they wish so long as they do not destroy other people's property or physically / mentally hurt another.  Unfortunately, not everyone views this the same way we do.  Some people believe it's okay to hurt someone so long as they get what they want.  

Yah, being Bi certainly is a bit more complicated.  On one hand, you can pretty much go fishing from both pools, enjoy the company of both genders.  On the other hand, a lot of non-understanding people view it as being more sex-crazed, doesn't matter who it is you just follow your penis wherever it leads you.  Yeah....

I like the Bi's tho, they seem to be most accepting of anyone and everyone and can actually really appreciate both genders.  Mind you, some have more of a preference to the same gender, others of the opposite but that still doesn't stop 'em from taking a look.  

Anyway, that's based on my own experiences when dealing with bisexuals.


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## Spatel (Jul 16, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> True, but then again, a lot of parents heavily frown on Video Games and Star Trek conventions.  *shrugs*



I got the trifecta unfortunately, since I go to Smash Tournaments, I have an encyclopedic knowledge of Star Trek, and well.... I mean I'm posting here of course I'm a goddamn furry.


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## Corwin Cross (Jul 16, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> Corwin, I am so happy to hear that your parents are supportive towards your bisexuality.  As for the Furry part, it's really just a hobby, and they should view it as such.  It's like a group of people speaking Klingon to one another and attending Star Trek conventions and participating in various Star Trek related activities.  Being Furry is fun tho and helps one get through life, just like books and music.  So long as your parents can understand that aspect of Furry, they should be fine with it.  Focus on the most important part, they accept you for who you are, the way that you are.


Yeah, they see the furry fandom as a bunch of pedophiles. Despite surveys saying... that most furries nowadays are 15-22 years of age. I just turned 17 two months ago.As for me, I kinda felt like the furry fandom was a good place to explore my sexuality as I got acclimated to it. When I 'joined' 4 years ago... I considered myself COMPLETELY straight. But now... I'm about 50/50.


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## Criminal Scum (Jul 17, 2012)

I came out to my older brother last night. He Took it really well and told me he was there if I needed him, etc. Then the conversation advanced to cool science stuff and we watched a rocket sled annihilate a car on mythbusters.

He's truly a great brother. c:


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## WanderingFox (Jul 17, 2012)

I haven't really had a coming out experience, but if I did it probably wouldn't end well if I did have one. 

Last night, my father called me and we talked and B.S.ed for the better part of half an hour until a recurring subject came up where he asks if I have a girlfriend yet. I say no, as I always do. He starts to get too inquisitive and worked up and starts to ask if I know what I want in terms of sexual things and I reply the same as always: "I dunno." Which led him to rant how unusual it was for an attractive male in his mid-20's not not understand such a thing before he started ranting aimlessly how he'd hunt me down and burn me at the stake if I was "a disgusting, no good HIV ridden faggot" followed by "but it's a good thing that'll never be the case."

Then 10 seconds later his tirade is over and the subject changes; only gay people and minorities bring out that kind of fervent hatred in him. Needless to say if I ever actually do find that I'm gay or bisexual, he's one crazy motherfucker I'll *n-e-v-e-r* be telling.


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 17, 2012)

Corwin Cross said:


> Yeah, they see the furry fandom as a bunch of pedophiles. Despite surveys saying... that most furries nowadays are 15-22 years of age. I just turned 17 two months ago.As for me, I kinda felt like the furry fandom was a good place to explore my sexuality as I got acclimated to it. When I 'joined' 4 years ago... I considered myself COMPLETELY straight. But now... I'm about 50/50.




Pedophiles ... ugh ... a lot of people are just so ignorant and view the Furry fandom as nothing but sex and with minors.  This purely disgusts me >_<  but at the same time too, it's understandable as people don't understand, or refuse to understand.  *sighs*

I found while reading thru this thread, and the initial thread, a lot of people actually determined their sexuality by these forums, FA, and the Furry Fandom.  Helped open their eyes to all the possibilities out there, and gave them a chance to explore and discuss these things without fear.  I find that very important, being able to Talk without Fear.  There's a lot of knowledge on these forums, esp these two threads and it helps a great deal reading thru the experiences of other people.

Anyway, best to keep the Furry discussions to online and with any friends you feel comfortable enough with.  Life will be good ^_^


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 17, 2012)

Criminal Scum said:


> I came out to my older brother last night. He Took it really well and told me he was there if I needed him, etc. Then the conversation advanced to cool science stuff and we watched a rocket sled annihilate a car on mythbusters.
> 
> He's truly a great brother. c:




Mythbusters is awesome ^_^ I'm so happy you felt comfortable enough to tell your brother, and even more happy that he fully accepted it!  That's awesome news!  And he has your back.  Everyone needs that kind of support!  Great job!!!


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## Criminal Scum (Jul 17, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> Mythbusters is awesome


Yes. Yes it is.


> I'm so happy you felt comfortable enough to tell your brother, and even more happy that he fully accepted it!


Lololol I wasn't comfortable enough, I just forced myself to do it.

 thanks.


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 17, 2012)

WanderingFox said:


> I haven't really had a coming out experience, but if I did it probably wouldn't end well if I did have one.
> 
> Last night, my father called me and we talked and B.S.ed for the better part of half an hour until a recurring subject came up where he asks if I have a girlfriend yet. I say no, as I always do. He starts to get too inquisitive and worked up and starts to ask if I know what I want in terms of sexual things and I reply the same as always: "I dunno." Which led him to rant how unusual it was for an attractive male in his mid-20's not not understand such a thing before he started ranting aimlessly how he'd hunt me down and burn me at the stake if I was "a disgusting, no good HIV ridden faggot" followed by "but it's a good thing that'll never be the case."
> 
> Then 10 seconds later his tirade is over and the subject changes; only gay people and minorities bring out that kind of fervent hatred in him. Needless to say if I ever actually do find that I'm gay or bisexual, he's one crazy motherfucker I'll *n-e-v-e-r* be telling.




ouch   it really sucks having a parent with those viewpoints.   Why can't people see that we are all humans?  We breathe, we eat, we belch, we fart, we poop.  What the heck is the difference?!  Ignorant people who don't know anything.  *shakes head*

Always a good idea to test around with people, friends, see what their opinions are on various different things, including gays.  Don't just ask about the gay stuff, have a conversation covering multiple topics, like hockey politics star wars, etc.  That way, if it turns out later on down the road, you really are gay or bi, you'll know who best to talk to.  It's always a good idea to have someone in your corner to watch your back.


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 17, 2012)

Criminal Scum said:


> Yes. Yes it is.
> 
> Lololol I wasn't comfortable enough, I just forced myself to do it.
> 
> thanks.




Either way, YOU DID IT ^_^  Yay!!!!


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 18, 2012)

Well, after finishing my last class for the day, I got the living shit kicked out me for the first time. Couple of cocky homophobes. I'm just lucky they didn't go after Ross, otherwise I'd have a perfectly valid reason to repeatedly bash their heads in with an iron rod. 

Couples of bruises, cuts, one of 'em busted my lip open pretty badly. Not much other than that. My boyfriend Ross on the other hand is completely traumatized by it. I keep telling him that I'm going to be fine, but no matter what, he's always got me in Bear Hug. Good thing I reported the guys who assaulted me to the Police and had them taken away.

Hey. I should've expected this. Australia isn't all THAT tolerant of Homosexuals. (=/


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 18, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> Well, after finishing my last class for the day, I got the living shit kicked out me for the first time. Couple of cocky homophobes. I'm just lucky they didn't go after Ross, otherwise I'd have a perfectly valid reason to repeatedly bash their heads in with an iron rod.
> 
> Couples of bruises, cuts, one of 'em busted my lip open pretty badly. Not much other than that. My boyfriend Ross on the other hand is completely traumatized by it. I keep telling him that I'm going to be fine, but no matter what, he's always got me in Bear Hug. Good thing I reported the guys who assaulted me to the Police and had them taken away.
> 
> Hey. I should've expected this. Australia isn't all THAT tolerant of Homosexuals. (=/





owwwwwchie   that's horrible >_<  I'm glad you're okay tho.  Good job on getting the police in on the action.  I know a lot of victims fear going to the police because they feel things will get much worse.  Like, when the abuser is released and seeks revenge, or his friends get the revenge for him.  I'd rather take the risk and report to the police myself.

I hear ya.  I don't mind it so much if I'm the one getting beat upon, but if anyone touches a single hair on my best bud, I will rip their balls off.  Nobody messes with those closest to me.  Ever.  

I hope Ross settles down soon and come to realize you really are okay.  It's never easy seeing someone you care so much for, being a victim of nasty violence.  I'm sorry this happened to you guys but I'm so glad you're okay.


If you don't mind me asking, what part of Australia are you in?  Northern Territory?  New South Wales?  Western?  etc.  I keep hearing mixed reports, depending on where one lives in Australia.  But then, depending on who I'm talking to, someone in Sydney would tell me that they see no problems in their area with gays, yet another in a different part of Sydney would say they see bashings quite a bit.  Guess it depends on who's doing the viewing and their own interpretations.

Anyway, you and Ross cuddle up with a movie, okay?


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 18, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> owwwwwchie   that's horrible >_<  I'm glad you're okay tho.  Good job on getting the police in on the action.  I know a lot of victims fear going to the police because they feel things will get much worse.  Like, when the abuser is released and seeks revenge, or his friends get the revenge for him.  I'd rather take the risk and report to the police myself.
> 
> I hear ya.  I don't mind it so much if I'm the one getting beat upon, but if anyone touches a single hair on my best bud, I will rip their balls off.  Nobody messes with those closest to me.  Ever.
> 
> ...



Well, I live in Southern Australia, Melbourne. The city itself is really beautiful and homely. The suburb I live in however is not so welcoming. Gangs, Thefts, Beatings, happens every month or 2. Me? I don't let my Ross go ANYWHERE in our suburb without me beside him. No exceptions. l=/

And thank you for your concern, War. Heh, Ross was actually twice as concerned for me as my parents were. And my parents were hysterical when they found out. 

To be perfectly honest, I didn't even think of my own safety when I was being beaten. I only cared about Ross getting the blue-hell out of there. And right now, my main concern is his well-being. Not mine. I'll heal up fine anyway. XP

And tonight, we're going to do a lot more than just cuddle up and watch a movie. If you catch my drift... l=)


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## BarlettaX (Jul 18, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> Well, after finishing my last class for the day, I got the living shit kicked out me for the first time. Couple of cocky homophobes. I'm just lucky they didn't go after Ross, otherwise I'd have a perfectly valid reason to repeatedly bash their heads in with an iron rod.
> 
> Couples of bruises, cuts, one of 'em busted my lip open pretty badly. Not much other than that. My boyfriend Ross on the other hand is completely traumatized by it. I keep telling him that I'm going to be fine, but no matter what, he's always got me in Bear Hug. Good thing I reported the guys who assaulted me to the Police and had them taken away.
> 
> Hey. I should've expected this. Australia isn't all THAT tolerant of Homosexuals. (=/



Goddamn man, have you ever considered taking a self defense course or something? Or at least defend yourself(scratch that, stick with a course, if you fail an untrained attempt, they'll come down on you with the force of a thousand WÃ¼nderwaffe DG-12 blasts to the face)
But really, that shit does not in my hood. It shouldn't in yours, either.


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 18, 2012)

BarlettaX said:


> Goddamn man, have you ever considered taking a self defense course or something?



First one to throw a punch is the first to run out of ideas. Too bad they already had an idea in mind... Besides, when I'm getting the shit kicked out me, I like to do what Tyler Durden did in _Fight Club... _Laugh in their face like a bloody maniac. To let them know that I'm enjoying it. And it's always important to stay positive!


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## BarlettaX (Jul 18, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> First one to throw a punch is the first to run out of ideas. Too bad they already had an idea in mind... Besides, when I'm getting the shit kicked out me, I like to do what Tyler Durden did in _Fight Club... _Laugh in their face like a bloody maniac. To let them know that I'm enjoying it. And it's always important to stay positive!



They'll think you're bloody off the deep end :b
But really, sorry bigots have to be strong over there.


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 18, 2012)

BarlettaX said:


> They'll think you're bloody off the deep end :b
> But really, sorry bigots have to be strong over there.



Oh. Pffft! Don't be. They got what was coming to them. One of them got 5 years imprisonment, no bail. The other two got 3 years with no bail as well. l=)


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 18, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> Well, I live in Southern Australia, Melbourne. The city itself is really beautiful and homely. The suburb I live in however is not so welcoming. Gangs, Thefts, Beatings, happens every month or 2. Me? I don't let my Ross go ANYWHERE in our suburb without me beside him. No exceptions. l=/
> 
> And thank you for your concern, War. Heh, Ross was actually twice as concerned for me as my parents were. And my parents were hysterical when they found out.
> 
> ...




Melbourne eh? Nice ^_^ I'd love to visit Australia sometime and visit all the major cities including Melbourne!!!  A friend of mine lives on the outskirts of Sydney on the western side and his area is actually pretty nice.  Really cruddy you live in a not-so-nice area   I wish all the nice people lived in the nice areas.  That's excellent that you go with Ross everyplace.  Have you guys considered moving to a different suburb, that's a li'l more friendly?  Probo difficult with classes, work, etc. tho but it IS something to consider in the future.

You are so lucky to have Ross, and he's really super lucky to have you.  I, too, have a habit of being more concerned about the well being of my closest friends because they just mean the world to me, and without them I'd be totally lost.  Never let Ross go, EVER, especially in bed    I hope you managed to calm down his nerves so he was able to sleep peacefully!


And just looking at the later msgs, oh wow!  5 years and 3 years without bail?  That's awesome!!!  ^_^


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 18, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> Melbourne eh? Nice ^_^ I'd love to visit Australia sometime and visit all the major cities including Melbourne!!!  A friend of mine lives on the outskirts of Sydney on the western side and his area is actually pretty nice.  Really cruddy you live in a not-so-nice area   I wish all the nice people lived in the nice areas.  That's excellent that you go with Ross everyplace.  Have you guys considered moving to a different suburb, that's a li'l more friendly?  Probo difficult with classes, work, etc. tho but it IS something to consider in the future.
> 
> You are so lucky to have Ross, and he's really super lucky to have you.  I, too, have a habit of being more concerned about the well being of my closest friends because they just mean the world to me, and without them I'd be totally lost.  Never let Ross go, EVER, especially in bed    I hope you managed to calm down his nerves so he was able to sleep peacefully!
> 
> ...



Me and Ross have thought about moving to a better place, but with work, school, social business and all, it's been rather hectic. But my parents are gonna try and pitch in to help us. We actually saw in the paper a really nice two story flat, and we've decided to make a pool in which to store any extra cash. So we can save up for it! =D

He never lets go of me in bed anyway. XD And thankfully, he's more level-headed now. But like all boyfriends/girlfriends, he still protects me like a Bald Eagle. To be honest, the only thing that can really calm my Ross down is (WARNING! CHEESY PHRASE COMING UP!) the sound of my heartbeat as he sleeps. It comforts him... (=)


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 19, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> Me and Ross have thought about moving to a better place, but with work, school, social business and all, it's been rather hectic. But my parents are gonna try and pitch in to help us. We actually saw in the paper a really nice two story flat, and we've decided to make a pool in which to store any extra cash. So we can save up for it! =D
> 
> He never lets go of me in bed anyway. XD And thankfully, he's more level-headed now. But like all boyfriends/girlfriends, he still protects me like a Bald Eagle. To be honest, the only thing that can really calm my Ross down is (WARNING! CHEESY PHRASE COMING UP!) the sound of my heartbeat as he sleeps. It comforts him... (=)




Yes indeed, great idea to start saving up for a move.  Your parents are gonna help eh?  That's awesome!   Best of luck with the saving of cash.  You guys need (and deserve) to be in a much better flat and neighbourhood.  

And I don't think that's cheesy at all ... I find it really sweet   Ross definitely has his priorities straight!  I'm so glad he's calmed down.  It was indeed a very scary situation.

*HUGS* to ya both ^_^


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## Conn1496 (Jul 19, 2012)

Still need a little push, but all in all, I'm ready to tell people. Only tell if they ask though. I don't feel they need to know, to be honest, so I keep it to myself. :|


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 19, 2012)

Conn1496 said:


> Still need a little push, but all in all, I'm ready to tell people. Only tell if they ask though. I don't feel they need to know, to be honest, so I keep it to myself. :|



Do you have a best bud you trust 200%, one that you know for certain will watch your back?  If so, then that's the one to tell    If uncertain who you can tell, probe around to see what people's opinions are regarding gays / bisexuals.  Maybe strike up a conversation about a celebrity who is gay or portrays a gay character in a movie / tv show.  That way you can get a feel for who will be accepting and who will not be.

If you happen to know of a relative who IS gay / bi, then that could very well be some extra support there 

But yah, figure out which person you want to tell, it will be a huge weight off your shoulders.  Anyone else, they don't need to know unless it's important enough to come up in conversation.  Take things in stride, be comfortable 

Best of luck to ya!!!


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## Kryn (Jul 22, 2012)

Ugh, I had the perfect chance to come out to my mom the other day. We were both outside doing some yard work. The whole topic of religion and such came up (I'm agnostic, she's a Methodist christian). I was raised in the church till I quit it at about 15. Anyway she told me about a time where she was at a Methodist convention or something and go into an argument with a priest about gays, her point was that she believed they were born that way because she knew gays that, in her own words: "struggled with it their whole lives". Apparently I have some gay relatives i didn't know about either that she told me about.

I just wanted to say the fucking words: "Mom, I'm gay". But goddammit I just couldn't say it. Eventually my dad came outside and I completely gave up at that point.

I guess I should be glad when I'm finally ready to tell her it won't be much of an issue, just feeling like a pussy for letting go a golden opportunity to come out to her. Me and my mom rarely talk about these things and just bringing it up out of the blue feels impossible for me.


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 22, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> Yes indeed, great idea to start saving up for a move.  Your parents are gonna help eh?  That's awesome!   Best of luck with the saving of cash.  You guys need (and deserve) to be in a much better flat and neighbourhood.
> 
> And I don't think that's cheesy at all ... I find it really sweet   Ross definitely has his priorities straight!  I'm so glad he's calmed down.  It was indeed a very scary situation.
> 
> *HUGS* to ya both ^_^



Awwww, thanks! ^.^

And as a 'Welcome back from the hospital' gift, he drew me and him as Furries cuddling on my couch (see my profile for reference). If he was any sweeter, he would be made of candy! l=)

Oh, and good news. My cast comes off in about 3 weeks! Can't wait. Ross has been, somewhat of a caretaker for me, so I feel kinda guilty about it right now. (=l

Still, better days are ahead for both of us!

So, what about you War? Found that special someone yet? S=)


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## H.B.C (Jul 22, 2012)

I can't imagine how hard it must be for some people. I feel kind of bad that I had it easy. Both my grandparents that I live with and my mother pretty much told me before I even knew myself that they'd be proud of me no matter what, and on one or two occasions specifically said that if I was gay, they'd love me all the same. When I actually did realize it, it was as simple as just telling them.
They didn't mind one bit, and neither did any of my close friends.
Heck, my mom even thought it was kind of cool. 
I'm really lucky to have family and friends like them. :3


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 22, 2012)

Kryn said:


> Ugh, I had the perfect chance to come out to my mom the other day. We were both outside doing some yard work. The whole topic of religion and such came up (I'm agnostic, she's a Methodist christian). I was raised in the church till I quit it at about 15. Anyway she told me about a time where she was at a Methodist convention or something and go into an argument with a priest about gays, her point was that she believed they were born that way because she knew gays that, in her own words: "struggled with it their whole lives". Apparently I have some gay relatives i didn't know about either that she told me about.
> 
> I just wanted to say the fucking words: "Mom, I'm gay". But goddammit I just couldn't say it. Eventually my dad came outside and I completely gave up at that point.
> 
> I guess I should be glad when I'm finally ready to tell her it won't be much of an issue, just feeling like a pussy for letting go a golden opportunity to come out to her. Me and my mom rarely talk about these things and just bringing it up out of the blue feels impossible for me.




Oh sweet, you have some relatives who are gay!  See if you can get ahold of any of them, even email.  They'll probo be the best ones to talk to first so you can be sure of their support!  Hopefully you can get the chance to tell your mum soon tho.  Sounds promising that she understands the whole "being gay" part and knows that it is NOT a phase.  

Anyway, I'm glad to hear she's not dead set against gays!  Give it time, another opportunity will present itself   Best of luck to ya!!!!!


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 22, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> Awwww, thanks! ^.^
> 
> And as a 'Welcome back from the hospital' gift, he drew me and him as Furries cuddling on my couch (see my profile for reference). If he was any sweeter, he would be made of candy! l=)
> 
> ...




Oh wow! What a lovely picture!!!  Is Ross also on FA? If so, what's his FA name so I can find him and +Watch?  Just did you ^_^

That's great you are healing up so nicely!!  The next few weeks will go by quickly!

As for me, heh, nah, I don't have that Special someone yet.  Altho it sure woulda helped having one during this past year while battling cancer.  Instead, I had a super sweet kick-ass best bud of a friend to check up on me and did my grocery shopping and visited me in hospital, took me home, etc.  So in a way, he could be considered my Special someone but I'm happy enough that he's my very best bud  

Someday tho I may latch onto someone just as awesome as my bud and be able to take it beyond the next level! haha

^_^


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## WarLegalomon (Jul 22, 2012)

H.B.C said:


> I can't imagine how hard it must be for some people. I feel kind of bad that I had it easy. Both my grandparents that I live with and my mother pretty much told me before I even knew myself that they'd be proud of me no matter what, and on one or two occasions specifically said that if I was gay, they'd love me all the same. When I actually did realize it, it was as simple as just telling them.
> They didn't mind one bit, and neither did any of my close friends.
> Heck, my mom even thought it was kind of cool.
> I'm really lucky to have family and friends like them. :3



Wow that's Great HBC ^_^  Everyone should be as lucky as you!  I'm so happy you have an awesome family


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 22, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> Oh wow! What a lovely picture!!!  Is Ross also on FA? If so, what's his FA name so I can find him and +Watch?  Just did you ^_^
> 
> That's great you are healing up so nicely!!  The next few weeks will go by quickly!
> 
> ...



Thank you! I had it framed in our bedroom. (=)

And no, sadly. He doesn't like doing commissions for people other than me or himself. And I don't blame him. Commissioning can be quite a chore. l=/

Funny story actually. Ross was (and still is) my childhood friend. We went through Kindergarten together, we went through Primary school, through High school, we've together now for 12 years. And one day while we were chilling at my house, playing some Gears of War, and well... He just latched onto me and pashed me. Funny how things turn out? l=)

Who knows? Maybe your first kiss will be from him! 

Best of luck to you, War.


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## H.B.C (Jul 22, 2012)

Gosh, that's so cool. I hope I find someone like your Ross someday. I mean, like how you two seem to share such an incredible bond. It's inspiring, to say the least.


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## Bipolar Bear (Jul 22, 2012)

H.B.C said:


> Gosh, that's so cool. I hope I find someone like your Ross someday. I mean, like how you two seem to share such an incredible bond. It's inspiring, to say the least.



Hahahahaha! It's rather funny, that he knows me better than my family does. XD

And hey, I hope you find someone like him too! =)


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## Ptomaine (Jul 26, 2012)

Touching stories all around. Several seem sadly common, mostly family and friends pushing away because of the hypocritical stereotypes, or just being religious almost to a fault. But, still quite a few that are rather nice and heart warming.

Have to say, when I first "came out" to anyone, it was my mom and step-dad about 7 years ago. My mom was ok with it at first, but I'm pretty sure that my step-dad was not very happy about it, but it seems like he's lying to my mother anyway, so I don't really care what he thinks. However, they both started telling me that it wasn't a good idea to tell anyone else, and that I should almost keep it a secret from everyone. I started realizing that they weren't happy with me when they started heaping extra chores on me and practically keeping me a prisoner in the house. I had almost no social life at all, and it really didn't help that they had decided to pull me out of school by the 7th grade and simply "leave me" to learn on my own.

I finally started going to the community college in town, and made several friends within a few days. And it wasn't long before some of my "habits" started raising red-flags to my friends, and a few of them actually came up to me and asked if I was gay. It was so sudden, I didn't even have any time to think of a lie, so I just told them the truth. Practically everyone still accepted me for who I was though, although there were quite a few more "gay jokes" thrown my way than before. (Didn't bother me in the least though, since I usually turned em back on them with something far worse.) This helped me to come to better terms with who I was, and helped for actually telling the one person I was deathly afraid of telling: my grandma. My mother had repeatedly told me that my grandma would stop loving me if I told her that I was gay, and sadly enough, I believed her for the longest time.

It was about a year after coming out to my friends at the college that I was living with a few friends after having a "falling out" with my mom and step-dad, and I was at my grandmas' house visiting. We were both smoking outside, talking about how college was going for me when I decided I'd ask her a question to lead up to me telling her I was gay. And I swear, that woman had the single best response I've ever heard anyone say so far. I asked her a simple question, scared to death that what my mother had been saying was right: "Grandma, do we have any gay relatives?" And her exact response? "Besides you?" I swear, my jaw practically touched the concrete, I was so surprised at the way she just threw that simple response at me like it meant absolutely nothing to her. I broke down crying for a good ten minutes, letting her know how much I loved her and how scared I was to tell her because of what my mother had said.

After that, it seemed like a weight lifted off my chest, and if I was asked by a friend or co-worker about it, I simply laughed and told them "Yeah, I'm gay. Is that a problem?" It felt really good to be able to tell people that, and not have to worry about what they thought about me. Almost everyone was very accepting of it, though a few started making jokes that were bordering on rude a bit more than usual, and others just stopped talking to me. I even had an old friend/bully drive slowly past me as I walked home from work and shoot BBs at me from his car after he found out. I was just lucky that he was a horrible shot, even from less than 10 feet away.

I've also told my biological father, my step-mom and my 2 sisters about 3 years ago when I finally got the chance to see them again after almost 12 years of being kept from them. (My mom was quite the @#$%& when it came to anything to do with my father, and decided to make me suffer for it while I lived with her. Needless to say, I don't talk to her anymore.) All of them accepted me immediately, with both of my sisters being extremely interested in asking me *LOTS* of questions.

So, I'd have to say I had an easier time coming out than I thought I would, and I'm thankful for that. Though, living in Kansas state now, doesn't really give me a lot of leeway to be as open as when I lived in Washington.


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## Saiko (Jul 26, 2012)

I felt guilty and told my parents that I'm bi. I felt insecure and ashamed of it and spent two months building my confidence and becoming comfortable with myself again. I even was able to conclude that, if I'm not gay I'm about as gay as you can be and still be bi.

And last night when I tried explaining what I felt and why I felt it and who I felt it for... I got knocked back to square one.

Except now I've lost confidence in my parents, friends, god, and self. I feel alone and like a self-deluding fool. I feel like I won't be satisfied with any path I take.


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## BlueDog4 (Jul 30, 2012)

I'm basically in the process of coming out, when I told my dad he flipped out and is in denial still talking about girls with me and my brother seems like he's become okay with but when I act like myself he ends up acting all weird and uncomfortable around me. But most of everyone else I know seems okay with it. But most of the straight idiots I grew up with sorta act all nervous and uncomfortable around me. The coolest people I know who have been cool with it are my furry friends. I just know that eventually that things will get better for me along with the many other people having trouble coming out.


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## Indigo-Mew (Aug 6, 2012)

WarLegalomon said:


> Wait ... wha?  Job application forms have tick boxes for Orientation?!    I think that's illegal to put on Canadian job application forms, but I could be wrong about that.  Wow ... UK certainly is different from over here.
> 
> Good job on a successful Coming Out
> 
> Keep the stories coming! ^_^



Oh I should explain that it was on a fair employment thing so they can monitor if they are being fair, still it probably upped my chances of geting the job!

I am not out yet though, every time I tell someone they always accept me and I feel much better so I have had it easy. I am still scared to let more people know however with time I think it will get better! I don't however want people to know I about my bf (kinda long distance). Don't get me wrong I really love him greatly but I just worry that people won't accept him or just think I am stupid as I have a relationship with someone I don't get to see much!


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## H.B.C (Aug 8, 2012)

Saiko said:


> I felt guilty and told my parents that I'm bi. I felt insecure and ashamed of it and spent two months building my confidence and becoming comfortable with myself again. I even was able to conclude that, if I'm not gay I'm about as gay as you can be and still be bi.
> 
> And last night when I tried explaining what I felt and why I felt it and who I felt it for... I got knocked back to square one.
> 
> Except now I've lost confidence in my parents, friends, god, and self. I feel alone and like a self-deluding fool. I feel like I won't be satisfied with any path I take.



Not sure if this'll help, considering circumstances for me were different, but I was in the same boat as you for a few months.
I mean, as far as the whole self-conflict thing goes...
If you need someone to talk to, I can try to help. I resolved all that turmoil with help from family & friends who supported me, along with a bit of an epiphany, but I had it easy.


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## Saiko (Aug 12, 2012)

H.B.C said:


> Not sure if this'll help, considering circumstances for me were different, but I was in the same boat as you for a few months.
> I mean, as far as the whole self-conflict thing goes...
> If you need someone to talk to, I can try to help. I resolved all that turmoil with help from family & friends who supported me, along with a bit of an epiphany, but I had it easy.


Eh, I've calmed down a good bit now and am mostly just trying to cruise on the matter until I move to my dorm Wednesday. I've actually since concluded that I'm as good as gay. The term bi only applies to me on a technicality. I may have no physical preference or hardly even attraction, but I have no emotional desire for a woman. I desire... and IMO need, a man. I'm also regaining trust in my reason as well as noticing some small inconsistencies in my parents', which is comforting.

Full recovery? Not yet, but I'm getting there. :3
(It helps that they recently stopped checking to see if I'm being day online... >.>)


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## Zuckerdachs (Aug 15, 2012)

Still semi-closeted.

My friends all know I'm gay, and I've no problem telling people if the subject arises. My family can't know, though. They're loud, proud Tea Party, with all the delightful xenophobic trappings. I'll never be able to be with a woman if I want to maintain any sort of relationship with them. Family is important to me ... even if it's conditional for them.

This is what homophobia does, folks.


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## Bipolar Bear (Aug 15, 2012)

A quick, but delightfully happy update!

After living in this piss-poor excuse for a suburb for a long time, me and Ross have spoken to my parents and they talked to my uncle about maybe giving us a place to stay other than here. Oh, it gets better...

He's given us his spare house over in a wonderful and rich neighborhood called Kew. It's closer to our school, and it's a way, way more pleasant suburb than the one we're currently in. One story house, 3 Bedrooms, 2 Toilets, 1 Bathroom, 1 Kitchen, the whole kitten-caboodle! Fully refurbished, new furniture, new floors... The house looks brand-bloody-new.

God, I'm so happy that we finally have a new place to call our own! No more death threats, no more fear, no more beatings... Oh god, I could cry tears of joy right now! (=,D


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## CaptainCool (Aug 15, 2012)

Saiko said:


> I felt guilty and told my parents that I'm bi. I felt insecure and ashamed of it and spent two months building my confidence and becoming comfortable with myself again. I even was able to conclude that, if I'm not gay I'm about as gay as you can be and still be bi.
> 
> And last night when I tried explaining what I felt and why I felt it and who I felt it for... I got knocked back to square one.
> 
> Except now I've lost confidence in my parents, friends, god, and self. I feel alone and like a self-deluding fool. I feel like I won't be satisfied with any path I take.



the only one who can give you confidence is yourself. realizing that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you is always the best first step.
your parents and friends simply have to learn to accept you for who you are. give them some time.
as for god... we cant know whether it actually exists so i wouldnt waste time on that. not to mention that the bible, which is supposedly gods word, makes it out to be quite the homophobe. why worship a homophobe?




Zuckerdachs said:


> Still semi-closeted.
> 
> My friends all know I'm gay, and I've no problem telling people if the subject arises. My family can't know, though. They're loud, proud Tea Party, with all the delightful xenophobic trappings. I'll never be able to be with a woman if I want to maintain any sort of relationship with them. Family is important to me ... even if it's conditional for them.
> 
> This is what homophobia does, folks.



you really shouldnt waste time trying to hold up a certain standard for them. you are wasting your time trying to make them happy while you are emotionally killing yourself from the inside.
let them be tea party members. who cares? just be yourself!^^


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## Hinalle K. (Aug 15, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> A quick, but delightfully happy update!
> 
> After living in this piss-poor excuse for a suburb for a long time, me and Ross have spoken to my parents and they talked to my uncle about maybe giving us a place to stay other than here. Oh, it gets better...
> 
> ...


Wow, that's gotta be the uncle of the year


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## Bipolar Bear (Aug 15, 2012)

Hinalle K. said:


> Wow, that's gotta be the uncle of the year



You're telling me. Imagine the gift card I'm going to have to get him. 0__0;


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## cobalt-blue (Aug 15, 2012)

Ruethel said:


> I guess I'm just looking for general guidance. XP



Why put yourself in a box (labeling what you are)?  Do you need to decide anything right now?  Time and some experience will show you your true self.


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## Spatel (Aug 19, 2012)

Ruethel said:


> I don't know, I guess I just want to try to understand myself better.  I want an answer, where there isn't really a concrete one, just a lot of strange feelings, and pan/bi just seems like what fits those feelings best.
> 
> I guess I also want to know how I should "present" myself before I go off to college.  I don't know, I guess I'm worried that if everyone thinks I'm straight, I might lose the chance to be with someone that would be right for me.



Well, I'm wary of imposing my personal narrative too much on other people, but you sound awfully similar to me 7 years ago. I'm 25 now, for reference, and I've been out as bisexual for the past few years to everyone I know. I waited until after college to come out, partly because I was more interested in having a girlfriend in college, partly because I wanted to be absolutely sure I wasn't going to 'take it back' and go straight after coming out, and a variety of other personal things.


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## Saiko (Aug 27, 2012)

Ruethel said:
			
		

> stuff


If I'm reading this right, you sound a lot like I do as well. My attractions are romantic; I "lust" after the person rather than the body. For me the physical attraction develops from closeness and compatibility, largely independent of gender. As such, I guess it is conceivable that I could end up with a wife. However, when I lay in bed feeling lonely, I long to be beside a guy. Also, the only person for whom I've had to fight an incessant urge to randomly hug is a guy.

In reality, I don't have a fucking clue what I am. But I also don't hardly care. I only identify as gay for simplicity. Also, I'm not really "out of the closet" here at college. I don't need everyone to know, only a couple specific friends. Don't be too particular about the exact implications of a label. All it is is a starting point for those who actually need to understand. And for those people, the implications will hardly be an issue.


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## Saiko (Aug 29, 2012)

Ruethel said:


> Thanks for the responses, although after thinking on it for a long time, and various events I'm certain I'm bisexual if not gay now.
> 
> I recently was told by a close online friend about his feelings for me, and I had had feelings for him as well, we talked and talked and well now we're in an LDR and happy to be together.  We hope to meet in real life one day, but for now we enjoy each other's company online.  He's so cute. :3


I just d'awwwed so hard. c:


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## kaskae (Aug 29, 2012)

Spatel said:


> Well, I'm wary of imposing my personal narrative too much on other people, but you sound awfully similar to me 7 years ago. I'm 25 now, for reference, and I've been out as bisexual for the past few years to everyone I know. I waited until after college to come out, partly because I was more interested in having a girlfriend in college, partly because I wanted to be absolutely sure I wasn't going to 'take it back' and go straight after coming out, and a variety of other personal things.



I've been there, for sure. Granted, it was my high school years, but the thoughts of wanting to at least throw any potential for going back to the wayside definitely existed. I was in a very steady relationship with my previous girlfriend before we had a falling out, and even then it took me a year to finally get myself to where I was comfortable with coming out as bisexual.

Granted, the way I did it probably wasn't the most traditional way of doing it, but I figured it would save me a ton of heartache not having to confront every person in my life and tell them this. I let the closest people in my family and friends know, and then I made a video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zxcg_cEQh9k

It actually turned out a lot better than I had anticipated, having spent the entirety of my high school career in Conservatopia, Montana. Good friends and family made it a seamless transition.


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## MrSynndicated (Sep 10, 2012)

I'm actually not quite sure I can say I came out as bisexual, I told my girl and my friends know but that's were it stops and this was only recently. I'm comfortable with it myself now but as I looked back after being asked when I thought this "Happened," I can see I always have been but I guess you could say I denied it. My first love even was my best friend, things happened though and I asked him but he didn't feel the same. I suspressed it after that for a long time covering with scattered girlfriends or just loneing it, then I started having feeling for another of my long time friends, but when I showed him how I felt I didn't see him when he went on to high school before me. then in high school I guess I got caught up in the image people had of me as the tough guy so I never told anyone, there were some who knew because we had little flings but nothing serious. Only now can I say I'm bisexual and believe even myself but the though of telling my family terrifies me, I keep thinking my brother and my dad would hate it. My friends now are cool with it, I'd go out on a limb and say some knew already since one liked to steal my bed and I refused to give up my bed so I slept there as well. Idk it's nice to be out and say I am but at the same time only some actually kow, writing this even is kinda freaking me out.


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## Imperial Impact (Sep 10, 2012)

Cummin' out


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## XXDeathPheonixXX (Sep 11, 2012)

No idea... I mean It is an option.


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## Saiko (Sep 15, 2012)

At college, joined the gay-straight alliance here, have a few gay friends now, and came out to a straight friend down the hall today.

Happy. c:


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## Percy (Sep 15, 2012)

I'm still too confused about my sexuality to know whether I can come out to anyone or not.


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## Repsychold (Sep 15, 2012)

Hey, I have a question for everybody:

How come, if a straight man says he's gay, everyone believes him or doesn't really doubt it much (but usually are shocked and maybe saddened or upset), but, if a gay man says he's straight, nobody believes it?


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## Spatel (Sep 16, 2012)

Homophobia.

Same reason if a bi guy comes out as bi, everyone thinks he's gay. It's the one drop rule. Homosexuality is this 'terrible' thing you see, and once someone tastes of the manflesh he must forever be banished to gayland. No takebacks. He is no longer fit to taint the supply of innocent women with his faggotry. If a straight man lies and says he's gay, everyone's eager to kick him out of the tribe anyway.


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## Repsychold (Sep 17, 2012)

Spatel said:
			
		

> Homophobia.
> 
> Same reason if a bi guy comes out as bi, everyone thinks he's gay. It's the one drop rule. Homosexuality is this 'terrible' thing you see, and once someone tastes of the manflesh he must forever be banished to gayland. No takebacks. He is no longer fit to taint the supply of innocent women with his faggotry. If a straight man lies and says he's gay, everyone's eager to kick him out of the tribe anyway.


It's a good way to permanently ruin your life then- can't say "I was just joking!" or anything along those lines. =\


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## Superfoxy (Oct 4, 2012)

I'm going over to my parents' house for my birthday in three days. My sisters will be there too. I've been thinking I may come out to them all when I have them in one place, since I don't really give a shit about much anymore, and I guess maybe misery is a good motivator. My relationship with them has never been that good, and I figure maybe this is a good way to try to find out if they're worth associating with. If I get some bigoted response, I'm sure as hell not going to edit my reply because parents have some free pass for being stupid or something. It would make things easier if I was able to just write them off.


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## Suezotiger (Oct 11, 2012)

Well I'm not really planning on coming out as bisexual to anyone right now but I think my parents are accepting enough that they won't disown me or try to fix me or anything like that. Reading some of these posts on here, I'm kind of shocked at how illogical some parents can be, particularly the religious ones.


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## Suezotiger (Oct 14, 2012)

So I came out to my mom today (I know, bad idea this early) and at a football game no less (also a bad idea) but it ended up working out.

She pointed out this one girl wearing some Hello Kitty ear muffs and (jokingly) asked, "Do you want some Hello Kitty ear muffs?" I (jokingly) answered, "Yeah sure." So then she asked me "You're not gay, right?" At this point, I was kind of stuck. I told her no because I'm technically not gay but I still felt like I lied to her. So after a minute or so of composing myself, I came out to her. She seemed a little shocked at first and I was sort of freaking out afterward until she told me, "You know we'll still love you no matter what," and that made me feel good.

So then we starting talking about crazy people killing their families. You know, the stuff we usually talk about.


----------



## Ryuu (Oct 17, 2012)

I was able to come out last week to a friend, and now we are dating and overall just having the time of our lives. 

He was acting nervous and weird till i confronted him with it, then once i came out he said he was Bi- also and we hit it off really well 

I told him i was a furry and he was all : "What is that?" so i showed him a little bit of art and he thought it was cool  

I have been spending every night with him, and it feels great being with him but everyone else has no idea. I think that people around me might be catching on as they keep hinting at me. I dont really want to come out because i feel that they would hate me and not understand.... but i feel like im getting torn in half right now as i like being open about things

I have also found that the more i am myself ( without mentioning im Bi- ) The more my friends want to hang around me and the better off i have been... It is really odd, but great!


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## NaxThewolf (mike) (Oct 21, 2012)

its gonna be tough for me trying to get back in the game hardly anyone near me likes me and i am petriffied what would happen if i told them iam into furrys


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## Ryuu (Oct 21, 2012)

DeathCoDread (Mike) said:


> its gonna be tough for me trying to get back in the game hardly anyone near me likes me and i am petriffied what would happen if i told them iam into furrys



Tell them you like the art, and that its just a hobby. After all that is what it is.


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## NaxThewolf (mike) (Oct 22, 2012)

thanks :3 i know that part the arts just epic but its the stereotypical bullcrap they will come out with and assume iam weirdo... and other things that will make me out to be something worse,,,


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## Ryuu (Oct 23, 2012)

So my BF today is thinking of moving a hour away, and that means our relationship is limited. I am thinking of just leaving him.


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## Schwimmwagen (Oct 23, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> So my BF today is thinking of moving a hour away, and that means our relationship is limited. I am thinking of just leaving him.



Only an hour?

My sister's boyfriend lives 3 hours away from her, and she visits him every single weekend.


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## Bipolar Bear (Oct 23, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> So my BF today is thinking of moving a hour away, and that means our relationship is limited. I am thinking of just leaving him.



Dude, my BF lives 72 hours away from me. And we're still together. =P


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## NaxThewolf (mike) (Oct 23, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> So my BF today is thinking of moving a hour away, and that means our relationship is limited. I am thinking of just leaving him.


 thats a shame


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## Ryuu (Oct 29, 2012)

Well, i talked him into staying at his current job  so he is staying. I am coming out next month and its going to be awkward. LOL


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## Mehru (Oct 29, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> Well, i talked him into staying at his current job  so he is staying. I am coming out next month and its going to be awkward. LOL


A lot less awkward than being caught in the act, I'd imagine, bud.


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## Ryuu (Oct 29, 2012)

Mehru said:


> A lot less awkward than being caught in the act, I'd imagine, bud.



well, im moving to a new place with new roommates, and that will be awkward too, so its just one after another. lol


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## Aldino (Oct 30, 2012)

... I had no idea this was a thread. Damn this would have been useful a few weeks ago, oh well.


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## Bipolar Bear (Oct 30, 2012)

Aldino said:


> ... I had no idea this was a thread. Damn this would have been useful a few weeks ago, oh well.



You've made some decent headway without it though, right? :3


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## Aldino (Oct 30, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> You've made some decent headway without it though, right? :3


Eh... Kinda? I mean the bit from the OP would have been the most useful bit.


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## Ryuu (Nov 3, 2012)

i wonder if i should text my parents to tell them. But then again i haven't even told my new roomate. I feel so ashamed right now because of this. My boyfriend isnt "out" so its just me on this one. I need to talk to someone who has been through this. I get Internet monday at my place and would be down to talk then 

 I dropped a hint to my parents accidentally the other day when i was at the club. They asked what the club i was at and i told them, Not realizing it was a gay club. (I was at a furry rave party  )


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## Saiko (Nov 8, 2012)

So yesterday I ended up coming out to four different friends, one of which I just blurted out as a comeback to "you're gay :V" without realizing it. xD
I also hugged a guy in public for the first time. ^.^

College is soooo much better than high school. <3

Except for my friend buying the exact same peacoat i wanted. >:I


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## Ryuu (Nov 8, 2012)

Saiko said:


> So yesterday I ended up coming out to four different friends. c:
> I also hugged a guy in public for the first time. ^.^
> 
> College is soooo much better than high school. <3I



Fantastic! i envy you for coming out. Im still in the closet under 15 blankets


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## Rheumatism (Nov 8, 2012)

You could make such a cool cave with those blankets.


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## Ryuu (Nov 8, 2012)

Rheumatism said:


> You could make such a cool cave with those blankets.



MY blankies! I plan on coming out once i get settled down here, or when people start putting 1+1 together


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## Saiko (Nov 9, 2012)

Woot! Came out to anutter a couple hours ago! \o/

And yeah, I did the same thing too, Ryuu. I made a few friends, let them get to know me as an individual, and then came out. This way they see me as a friend who is gay instead of a gay friend.

Also, dun be nervous. I presume you're in college, and students really don't give a fuck. Even in Mississippi. :3


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## Ryuu (Nov 9, 2012)

Saiko said:


> Woot! Came out to anutter a couple hours ago! \o/
> 
> 
> And yeah, I did the same thing too, Ryuu. I made a few friends, let them get to know me as an individual, and then came out. This way they see me as a friend who is gay instead of a gay friend.
> ...


 

Im not in college, but I kind of went through that stage before moving out here


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## Ryuu (Nov 13, 2012)

Im not enjoying the thought of coming out... but my roommates would catch on if i brought a guy home, and i dont want the drama. I still want to tell my parents but they are Kind of Anti-Gay/black/anything else that might be not like them


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## Percy (Nov 13, 2012)

Since I've come to the conclusion that I'm bi, now I'm trying to decide when a good time to come out would be... and who to tell first. I'd guess my sister, because I know she's a strong supporter of gay rights.


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## Ryuu (Nov 13, 2012)

Percy said:


> Since I've come to the conclusion that I'm bi, now I'm trying to decide when a good time to come out would be... and who to tell first. I'd guess my sister, because I know she's a strong supporter of gay rights.



How long have you been bi- if you dont mind? 

I've known for about 6-7 years now, i started experimenting... and then ya.


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## Percy (Nov 13, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> How long have you been bi- if you dont mind?
> 
> I've known for about 6-7 years now, i started experimenting... and then ya.


I've had the thought that it was a possibility for about 2 years, but only recently decided that I was indeed bi.
I haven't actually experimented, so I don't know how much it'll hold true, but we'll see.


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## Ryuu (Nov 13, 2012)

Percy said:


> I've had the thought that it was a possibility for about 2 years, but only recently decided that I was indeed bi.
> I haven't actually experimented, so I don't know how much it'll hold true, but we'll see.



my best advice is to get with someone, and find out before you come out.


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## Percy (Nov 13, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> my best advice is to get with someone, and find out before you come out.


That's what I was planning on doing. I'd like to actually try with a male before I come to any true conclusions.


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## Ryuu (Nov 13, 2012)

Percy said:


> That's what I was planning on doing. I'd like to actually try with a male before I come to any true conclusions.



If you were closer.... lol


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## Butters Shikkon (Nov 13, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> If you were closer.... lol



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CLnKrmi1evM

Hey, skinny britches...


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## benignBiotic (Nov 13, 2012)

Hrm. Coming out. I am bisexual which my online and IRL friends know about and are fine with. I'm very hesitant to tell people because I don't want to be ostracized. It's really the guys I worry about because there are so many homophobic men. But I'm not the most masculine guy ever so people surely make assumptions. 

It's not a big deal for me. I'm definitely not an overtly sexual person. The people I care about know I'm bi (and furry) and they are fine with it. My parents don't know, but I think it's better that way. I'm a chameleon really I blend in with my social situation. If the mood is hetero I'll highlight my straightness. If it's homo-friendly I'll let loose.


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## Ryuu (Nov 13, 2012)

I keep thinking tonight of how im going to feel when i finally come out, and i feel like im complete, and im content, i feel like 7193190831030183209 bucks.


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## Butters Shikkon (Nov 13, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> I keep thinking tonight of how im going to feel when i finally come out, and i feel like im complete, and im content, i feel like 7193190831030183209 bucks.



Well, it's definetly a personal experience for everyone. I wish you good luck, Ryuu. There's nothing worse than being hated for something that isn't wrong and having to supress something you really feel strongly about.

I'm just lucky that I never really had to come out...I've acted gay for as long as I can remember. It's really difficult for me to 'straighten up' so mostpeople just assume I am without asking.


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## Ryuu (Nov 14, 2012)

Butterflygoddess said:


> Well, it's definetly a personal experience for everyone. I wish you good luck, Ryuu. There's nothing worse than being hated for something that isn't wrong and having to supress something you really feel strongly about.
> 
> I'm just lucky that I never really had to come out...I've acted gay for as long as I can remember. It's really difficult for me to 'straighten up' so mostpeople just assume I am without asking.



I act pretty straight, so most people wont notice until they know me for a few days


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## Bipolar Bear (Nov 14, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> I keep thinking tonight of how im going to feel when i finally come out, and i feel like im complete, and im content, i feel like 7193190831030183209 bucks.



Do it, Ryuu. From my experience, it feels like a 10-ton weight has been lifted off your shoulders. You'll feel happy, open, you'll discover parts of yourself you never thought you knew. It's also a massive kick to your self-esteem! =3


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## Percy (Nov 14, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> Do it, Ryuu. From my experience, it feels like a 10-ton weight has been lifted off your shoulders. You'll feel happy, open, you'll discover parts of yourself you never thought you knew. It's also a massive kick to your self-esteem! =3


Goodness, I really want to come out myself, yet I don't know how I would do that, yet alone how much my family would accept that.


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## Bipolar Bear (Nov 14, 2012)

Percy said:


> Goodness, I really want to come out myself, yet I don't know how I would do that, yet alone how much my family would accept that.



The one thing to remember, is that it's not about them. It's about you. It's about you being comfortable with who you are, and not letting anyone else's opinion get in the way of that. Luckily for me, my parents just patted me on the back and said 'Good on you'. It's all about 'The right time'. Where it's just you and your parents. If they love you, then they will accept you. But if they're opposed to you coming out, then you stick to your guns. 

Remember, it's about what YOU want. Not what THEY want. (=)


----------



## Percy (Nov 14, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> The one thing to remember, is that it's not about them. It's about you. It's about you being comfortable with who you are, and not letting anyone else's opinion get in the way of that. Luckily for me, my parents just patted me on the back and said 'Good on you'. It's all about 'The right time'. Where it's just you and your parents. If they love you, then they will accept you. But if they're opposed to you coming out, then you stick to your guns.
> 
> Remember, it's about what YOU want. Not what THEY want. (=)


Thanks a lot. It's still a nerve-racking thing, of course, and I don't like being direct, either. Hopefully I can figure something out.


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## Ryuu (Nov 14, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> The one thing to remember, is that it's not about them. It's about you. It's about you being comfortable with who you are, and not letting anyone else's opinion get in the way of that. Luckily for me, my parents just patted me on the back and said 'Good on you'. It's all about 'The right time'. Where it's just you and your parents. If they love you, then they will accept you. But if they're opposed to you coming out, then you stick to your guns.
> 
> Remember, it's about what YOU want. Not what THEY want. (=)



That is very true... but i really couldn't tell them to there face unless they asked me... I want to text them to say it but i couldn't do that. I feel like just posting on FB, but i dont feel that thats the way to go either


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## Grunnolf (Nov 14, 2012)

Ryuu as BB said just let it be you and your parents no one else and sort of "dance" around the bush .... let them know but dont put it bluntly if your scared on being rejected i mean you have a few FAF people who will gladly help you out and be at your side to help you through whatever happens. again as BB said " If they love you, then they will except you." so hey  guess what it's exactly that man i'm pretty sure they won't have an issue with it.


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## Ryuu (Nov 14, 2012)

Im trying to drop them clues, so that they ask me. then i will come out


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## Grunnolf (Nov 14, 2012)

start small and increase in gradual increments


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## Ryuu (Nov 14, 2012)

Posted a furry video to my FB as a hint today, we shall see where it leads


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## Schwimmwagen (Nov 14, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> Posted a furry video to my FB as a hint today, we shall see where it leads



AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA

http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...YOU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!


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## Kangamutt (Nov 14, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> Posted a furry video to my FB as a hint today, we shall see where it leads



Wrong coming out, dude. We're talking about coming out gay/bi/trans and such.

That being said, I've been spending the past year now trying to work up the courage to come out to my own family. The hard part for me, though, is that when I'm literally footsteps away from my house, I suddenly start to feel extremely sick and end up puking into the gutter, not saying anything at all when I go inside. Anxiety's a bitch. :/


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## Grunnolf (Nov 14, 2012)

Kangaroo he is trying to but first he wants to tell his parents that he is a furry then he is going to fully come out. .... Read further back in the thread it should help to catch you up


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## Butters Shikkon (Nov 14, 2012)

Personally, I don't see what being a furry has to do with liking dudes....but ok.


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## Percy (Nov 14, 2012)

Butterflygoddess said:


> Personally, I don't see what being a furry has to do with liking dudes....but ok.


It has nothing to do with liking dudes. Being a furry is just being a furry.


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## Butters Shikkon (Nov 14, 2012)

Percy said:


> It has nothing to do with liking dudes. Being a furry is just being a furry.



I kinda put homosexuality on a higher 'need to know' basis than my love of anthro characters...if anything I think that would confuse his parents more if some people's furry coming out stories are to be believed.

Well, Ryuu knows his parents better anyway. Prehaps this'll work out for him.


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## Ryuu (Nov 14, 2012)

Gibby said:


> AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA
> 
> http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...YOU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!




hahaha, i know i dont have to come out as a furry. lol I just told everyone on my facebook page that i enjoy the art and meets. I dont care if they know about that. 


Im bi- that is what im trying to convey to my parents/close friends.


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## Ryuu (Nov 14, 2012)

Butterflygoddess said:


> I kinda put homosexuality on a higher 'need to know' basis than my love of anthro characters...if anything I think that would confuse his parents more if some people's furry coming out stories are to be believed.
> 
> Well, Ryuu knows his parents better anyway. Prehaps this'll work out for him.



Furry is just a hobby and a good way to meet new people to me, no big deal there. nothing special. its like riding bikes, or racing cars. though not as expensive or dangerous


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## FreedomXJustice (Nov 14, 2012)

Hmm...coming out... Wasn't a big deal for me. I did so back in May. Yes, something as simple as a sexual preference brought my mother to tears of shame and what little contact I had left with my father completely broken but they're very christian so I wasn't expecting anything pleasant. Hell, it turned out a lot better than how some "other" parents take their child's sexuality. Either way, once it's out it's out, and it feels pretty damn good. Ahaha.


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## Toshabi (Nov 15, 2012)

I've always had a feeling that I wasn't like the rest of the people in my neighborhood. It was something my mom always talked about with us once a year, 'the day she said her vows on that altar'. She reminisced and always babbled on about her wedding day when she became married to her one true love. She always told me "Some day, you'll find that special someone that's right for you and I'll be expecting us to go through the same kind of wedding that I did". I never liked letting my mom down, for I felt like she was the only person in the world that actually cared about me. She backed me 100% with everything I did, even if the idea seemed so out there. Me doing football? Basketball? Those kinds of things were laughed at when I rose my hand high to participate in, but I wasn't like the average kid. I was adventurous and always seeking a new way to do things. It's just... you know how parents can be with their beliefs. My parents were the typical kind of parents that had the "it's our way or the highway" rule. And I was absolutely okay with them having those rules too! One rule,... well, you already know, especially if you're reading this thread. I suppose I should get into that now. After school one day, I was sitting outside on the rails, awaiting my mom to pick me up after she got out of work when I was approached by a girl from my economics class. It was her,... Elizabeth. She looked into my eyes softly, and mine back at hers, smiled a bit, and sat down beside me on the rail. Me and her had a thing going on behind the scenes.... much behind the scenes. My parents were against such a thing from being had in their household. I mean, I shouldn't even be attracted to her, yet,.... there was something about her.... something different that made her seem like loving her like that was.... well, the right thing to do. She stared at me and held onto my hand a bit, "You know... as long as you're not afraid..." she said hesitantly. I looked up at her, feeling like a lump of gum was forming in my throat as I awaited her to grace my ears with her message. She looked away a bit, a little teary in her eyes. She had never engaged in... well... the 'taboo relationship' as my parents would call it. You see, my parents have always been against this sort of thing. They told me that they'd raise me the way that was 'right'. I mean I'm not against their standards or anything, but... damn it, who should be allowed to dictate who I can love based on their gender? At that instant, I gripped onto her hand and looked her in the eyes, "Tonight,.... I don't care what happens, but I can't hide my feelings for you any longer". She was shocked by my sudden burst of courage, a warm, soft red spread across her delicate cheeks. My mother came by to pick us up. I helped her into the car and told my mom she was staying over till her parents got home. What I was in for was going to be the night my whole life changed.


It wasn't long before both my parents got home. I felt like it'd be best to sit down with them and discuss this thing while she was over here, the love of my life. My nerves were completely shot and my body tingled with anxiety as I looked my parents dead in the eyes. My mom looked at how my hand was clenched onto my loves hand and I can see her mouth tense with rage as she started predicting what I was about to speak with them about. "You,... well... you both know Elizabeth...." I said, struggling to keep my composure. My parents nodded, shaking their heads in disgust. I can't recall exactly what this was, but it felt as though my entire body felt numb, sort of like a panic attack seizing your entire body, however, you feeling absolutely nothing at all. I suppose you can call it a moment of clarity, a moment when time seemed to have stopped where I could think about the scenarios that will play out from all of this. On one end, I could see my parents accepting me for who I am and allowing me to date her. On the other end, they could throw a fit, slam their beliefs on me and throw me out of their house, literally disowning me on the spot. I took one last deep breath, and looked them both dead in the eye. My lips, slowly opening, finally spoke the words that changed my life forever; "Mom and Mom,.... I'm straight".


----------



## Percy (Nov 15, 2012)

Toshabi, that was beautiful.


----------



## NaxThewolf (mike) (Nov 15, 2012)

Toshabi said:


> I've always had a feeling that I wasn't like the rest of the people in my neighborhood. It was something my mom always talked about with us once a year, 'the day she said her vows on that altar'. She reminisced and always babbled on about her wedding day when she became married to her one true love. She always told me "Some day, you'll find that special someone that's right for you and I'll be expecting us to go through the same kind of wedding that I did". I never liked letting my mom down, for I felt like she was the only person in the world that actually cared about me. She backed me 100% with everything I did, even if the idea seemed so out there. Me doing football? Basketball? Those kinds of things were laughed at when I rose my hand high to participate in, but I wasn't like the average kid. I was adventurous and always seeking a new way to do things. It's just... you know how parents can be with their beliefs. My parents were the typical kind of parents that had the "it's our way or the highway" rule. And I was absolutely okay with them having those rules too! One rule,... well, you already know, especially if you're reading this thread. I suppose I should get into that now. After school one day, I was sitting outside on the rails, awaiting my mom to pick me up after she got out of work when I was approached by a girl from my economics class. It was her,... Elizabeth. She looked into my eyes softly, and mine back at hers, smiled a bit, and sat down beside me on the rail. Me and her had a thing going on behind the scenes.... much behind the scenes. My parents were against such a thing from being had in their household. I mean, I shouldn't even be attracted to her, yet,.... there was something about her.... something different that made her seem like loving her like that was.... well, the right thing to do. She stared at me and held onto my hand a bit, "You know... as long as you're not afraid..." she said hesitantly. I looked up at her, feeling like a lump of gum was forming in my throat as I awaited her to grace my ears with her message. She looked away a bit, a little teary in her eyes. She had never engaged in... well... the 'taboo relationship' as my parents would call it. You see, my parents have always been against this sort of thing. They told me that they'd raise me the way that was 'right'. I mean I'm not against their standards or anything, but... damn it, who should be allowed to dictate who I can love based on their gender? At that instant, I gripped onto her hand and looked her in the eyes, "Tonight,.... I don't care what happens, but I can't hide my feelings for you any longer". She was shocked by my sudden burst of courage, a warm, soft red spread across her delicate cheeks. My mother came by to pick us up. I helped her into the car and told my mom she was staying over till her parents got home. What I was in for was going to be the night my whole life changed.
> 
> 
> It wasn't long before both my parents got home. I felt like it'd be best to sit down with them and discuss this thing while she was over here, the love of my life. My nerves were completely shot and my body tingled with anxiety as I looked my parents dead in the eyes. My mom looked at how my hand was clenched onto my loves hand and I can see her mouth tense with rage as she started predicting what I was about to speak with them about. "You,... well... you both know Elizabeth...." I said, struggling to keep my composure. My parents nodded, shaking their heads in disgust. I can't recall exactly what this was, but it felt as though my entire body felt numb, sort of like a panic attack seizing your entire body, however, you feeling absolutely nothing at all. I suppose you can call it a moment of clarity, a moment when time seemed to have stopped where I could think about the scenarios that will play out from all of this. On one end, I could see my parents accepting me for who I am and allowing me to date her. On the other end, they could throw a fit, slam their beliefs on me and throw me out of their house, literally disowning me on the spot. I took one last deep breath, and looked them both dead in the eye. My lips, slowly opening, finally spoke the words that changed my life forever; "Mom and Mom,.... I'm straight".


 tosh buddy my broken heart beated a little for the first time i cant remember the last time i felt it.....


----------



## Ryuu (Nov 16, 2012)

I officially broke up with my BF. :sad: things just weren't working out. now i feel alone, in my closet


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## Percy (Nov 24, 2012)

So, today I came out as bi to my sister. I knew she'd be the first person I would do so to, because I knew she'd be accepting of it (her ex is gay, and she's great friends with him). And she was. It really is a big weight coming off your chest just telling one person... I can't imagine the feeling of when I eventually tell the rest of my family. Hopefully I'll find the perfect time to, and hopefully soon.


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## Ryuu (Nov 30, 2012)

great for you Percy! 

I came out today to a friend of 10 years.... no reaction yet


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## Saiko (Dec 4, 2012)

Well I have good news and bad news.

The good news is that I'm pretty much openly gay at college now. No one gives a fuck, and my "natural behavior" is actually as such that they sometimes forget until i crack a gay joke. I just... live. c:

The bad news is, although my parents aren't in denial at least, now they're at that stage where they constantly check on me to make sure I'm not being gay. So now they often ask if a given friend is gay or why someone gave me a Christmas present. They also continue to believe that thinking about girls more will magically make me want a girl. -_-


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## Ryuu (Dec 7, 2012)

i have a feeling thats how my parents will be... -.-


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## Ryuu (Dec 9, 2012)

Still haven't came out about this to anyone but one friend.... he didn't really take it well, but he still likes me i guess. i think it makes him feel awkward.

I want to before the new year starts


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## Butters Shikkon (Dec 9, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> Still haven't came out about this to anyone but one friend.... he didn't really take it well, but he still likes me i guess. i think it makes him feel awkward.
> 
> I want to before the new year starts



I hate to be harsh...but to hell with him, Ryuu.

Being a homosexual is not a big deal...and if he wants to be a dick about it, drop him like a bag a dirt.


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## Saiko (Dec 10, 2012)

Oh look what my dad linked me. http://www.rfmedia.org/RF_audio_video/RF_podcast/Can_a_Christian_be_Homosexual.mp3

He wants to talk about it intellectually sometime.

What it says in a nutshell? I can have the homosexual orientation, but choosing to pursue it is sinful.
So basically I have to either get a girlfriend or be celibate. Sounds great...


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## Percy (Dec 10, 2012)

Saiko said:


> Oh look what my dad linked me. http://www.rfmedia.org/RF_audio_video/RF_podcast/Can_a_Christian_be_Homosexual.mp3
> 
> He wants to talk about it intellectually sometime.
> 
> ...


This is why I gave up on religion.
And also why I'm extremely hesitant on coming out to my mom's side of the family. I'm sure some will be accepting, but I'm sure others have the same mindset as your dad.


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## Butters Shikkon (Dec 10, 2012)

Saiko said:


> Oh look what my dad linked me. http://www.rfmedia.org/RF_audio_video/RF_podcast/Can_a_Christian_be_Homosexual.mp3
> 
> He wants to talk about it intellectually sometime.
> 
> ...



I dunno, it seems to me that this is a good sign. Your Dad might be close to accepting you actually since he's moved out of the "You pussyass muthafucker!!" stage and is almost viewing you as a person with a mental disorder. 

Baby steps I suppose. 

And hey, at least he's not like the guy who wrote this crap: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0CuohHsPAA


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## Ryuu (Dec 11, 2012)

Saiko said:


> Oh look what my dad linked me. http://www.rfmedia.org/RF_audio_video/RF_podcast/Can_a_Christian_be_Homosexual.mp3
> 
> He wants to talk about it intellectually sometime.
> 
> ...




Sinful.... HA. Pathetic. This is why i am not christian. I kind of fall into the Hindu religion...


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## Milo (Dec 11, 2012)

I'm dating a guy! and I think we're supposed to be private about it, so I have to keep it a secret, even though all I want to do is brag about it. I guess it's a good thing it's over the internet, since he's not out to his family... because I'd be over there bouncing around like a flaming fag, kissing him all over and stuff.


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## Butters Shikkon (Dec 11, 2012)

Milo said:


> I'm dating a guy! and I think we're supposed to be private about it, so I have to keep it a secret, even though all I want to do is brag about it. I guess it's a good thing it's over the internet, since he's not out to his family... because I'd be over there bouncing around like a flaming fag, kissing him all over and stuff.



Congrats. ^^ I think we've all had that jump for joy moment.


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## Imperial Impact (Dec 17, 2012)

Milo said:


> I'm dating a guy! and I think we're supposed to be private about it, so I have to keep it a secret, even though all I want to do is brag about it. I guess it's a good thing it's over the internet, since he's not out to his family... because I'd be over there bouncing around like a flaming fag, kissing him all over and stuff.


Is it david?


----------



## Bipolar Bear (Dec 17, 2012)

Ryuu said:


> Sinful.... HA. Pathetic. This is why i am not christian. I kind of fall into the Hindu religion...



Buddhism all the way! XD


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## Magick (Dec 18, 2012)

Bipolar Bear said:


> Buddhism all the way! XD



I'll stick with Paganism, but those are both good as well.


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## Saiko (Dec 18, 2012)

Percy said:


> This is why I gave up on religion.


I'm still Christian and all, just I neither believe it's a sin nor can comprehend why it would be. And if I'm wrong... oh well. I made a mistake that doesn't change my salvation.

Best of both worlds. :V

Also, short update: parents still check if friend <x> is gay, but mom did make a gay joke at me yesterday. xD


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## helioswolf (Dec 22, 2012)

no one's "gay".  buttsex is like mcdonalds.  it's gross but pleasurable, and everyone loves it.  those who say they don't just haven't experienced the magic yet.  also, 'gay marriage' is the most retarded idea ever since regular marriage.


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## Saiko (Dec 22, 2012)

helioswolf said:


> no one's "gay".  buttsex is like mcdonalds.  it's gross but pleasurable, and everyone loves it.  those who say they don't just haven't experienced the magic yet.  also, 'gay marriage' is the most retarded idea ever since regular marriage.


Seriously?

Would you mind not posting shit in the thread where kids talk about their own families attacking them?


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## Kalmor (Dec 22, 2012)

helioswolf said:


> no one's "gay".  buttsex is like mcdonalds.  it's gross but pleasurable, and everyone loves it.  those who say they don't just haven't experienced the magic yet.  also, 'gay marriage' is the most retarded idea ever since regular marriage.


You sir/madam/whatever have been living under rock these past few, say, decades? 

"No one is gay" - That must be the most retarded comment of the year, well done.


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## Percy (Dec 23, 2012)

helioswolf said:


> no one's "gay".  buttsex is like mcdonalds.  it's gross but pleasurable, and everyone loves it.  those who say they don't just haven't experienced the magic yet.  also, 'gay marriage' is the most retarded idea ever since regular marriage.


Probably trolling.


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## helioswolf (Dec 23, 2012)

Not trolling


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## Saiko (Dec 23, 2012)

helioswolf said:


> Not trolling


Then you have no business with or contributions to this topic.


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## Butters Shikkon (Dec 23, 2012)

helioswolf said:


> Not trolling



I call bullshit.


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## helioswolf (Dec 23, 2012)

Butterflygoddess said:


> I call bullshit.



You're a bird


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## helioswolf (Dec 23, 2012)

This thread is in some serious need of some good music. Someone play something good or you're all fired


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## DJ-Fragon (Dec 24, 2012)

I came out as bi (leaning hetero) to my mom about a week ago. Her response? "Okay", like it wasn't a big deal. I love my family.


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## DairyProduct (Dec 26, 2012)

My friends all know I dig the laydeez. I never really had to "come out" to them per se, it's just something they all sort of figured out considering I pretty actively tell them about my crushes on girls, lol

I'm a bit hesitant about telling my family though, for obvious reasons. They're pretty open minded and I'm sure they won't outright shun me, but I guess I'm just nervous.


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## Tableside6 (Dec 26, 2012)

I'm kind of the same way. Only a few people I know (not including this website), know I'm a furry, but I am being open about being gay. They get shocked at first, but then they don't care.
My parents don't know about it either. However, I would rather keep it that way. I'm sure they wouldn't care if I was gay, but I just don't feel comfortable them knowing.


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## Magick (Dec 26, 2012)

My dad figured out I was gay the old fashioned way *Cough* Internet *Cough* so I never had to actually tell him anything, and I'm kind of glad about that.

We both love Seinfeld, and I always thought he would do the "Not that there's anything wrong with that!" bit.


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## Ruastin (Dec 26, 2012)

One of these day i will have to tell my mom (Told my dad he disowned me) that im Bi


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## Tableside6 (Dec 26, 2012)

Ruastin said:


> One of these day i will have to tell my mom (Told my dad he disowned me) that im Bi



That really sucks how your dad disowned you. I hate it how parents would just disown you for your sexuality.


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## DJ-Fragon (Dec 26, 2012)

Ruastin said:


> One of these day i will have to tell my mom (Told my dad he disowned me) that im Bi



A father should love his child, whether that child is straight, gay, lesbian, bi, transgender, etc. Really sorry to hear that.


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## Percy (Dec 26, 2012)

Ruastin said:


> One of these day i will have to tell my mom (Told my dad he disowned me) that im Bi


I just don't understand why parents disown people because they're not 100% heterosexual. You created the child, you should care for him/her no matter what.


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## NightWolf20 (Dec 26, 2012)

Percy said:


> I just don't understand why parents disown people because they're not 100% heterosexual. You created the child, you should care for him/her no matter what.



Obsessively dogmatic, witch-hunting garbage is all that comes to mind... or just rampant homophobia. I agree. If you have the kid, no matter what you believe, you should love/care for them regardless of ...anything!

Ruastin, I really hate it for you, buddy. Wish I could give more than just words on a screen, but I hope things get better.


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## xAngelStormx (Dec 26, 2012)

So, errrrr I came out to my parents about being bi a month ago and then to my surprise, my mum came out to my dad about being a lesbian, but the worst thing is that my girlfriend came out as a lesbian as well (That made completely no sense what so ever 'cause I swear she forced me to have sex with her all the time -_-). Now they're divorced, I have two mums and a very sexy guy, that I'm not dating, but who keeps trying to confess his love for me ^.^' its cute in a way... Also, my ex has a gf ^.^
A lot of things sure happen in a month ^.^'

EDIT: I think I'm going through a more gay phase recently...


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## Tableside6 (Dec 26, 2012)

xAngelStormx said:


> So, errrrr I came out to my parents about being bi a month ago and then to my surprise, my mum came out to my dad about being a lesbian, but the worst thing is that my girlfriend came out as a lesbian as well (That made completely no sense what so ever 'cause I swear she forced me to have sex with her all the time -_-). Now they're divorced, I have two mums and a very sexy guy, that I'm not dating, but who keeps trying to confess his love for me ^.^' its cute in a way... Also, my ex has a gf ^.^
> A lot of things sure happen in a month ^.^'
> 
> EDIT: I think I'm going through a more gay phase recently...



That's the strangest scenerio I've ever heard. That must have been really confusing. I could imagine if they just forgot you said you were a bi. Anyways, I find it epic how that all happened.


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## Kalmor (Dec 26, 2012)

xAngelStormx said:


> So, errrrr I came out to my parents about being bi a month ago and then to my surprise, my mum came out to my dad about being a lesbian, but the worst thing is that my girlfriend came out as a lesbian as well (That made completely no sense what so ever 'cause I swear she forced me to have sex with her all the time -_-). Now they're divorced, I have two mums and a very sexy guy, that I'm not dating, but who keeps trying to confess his love for me ^.^' its cute in a way... Also, my ex has a gf ^.^
> A lot of things sure happen in a month ^.^'
> 
> EDIT: I think I'm going through a more gay phase recently...


Wow that's a strange situation you have there.


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## xAngelStormx (Dec 26, 2012)

It was, I actually ended up saying "do you even care if your son wants to shag men other guys? " though I do feel bad for my dad, 17 years and 7 kids too late to reveal her sexuality... tisk tisk, but I can't complain, or I wouldn't be here ^.^'


----------



## DJ-Fragon (Dec 26, 2012)

xAngelStormx said:


> So, errrrr I came out to my parents about being bi a month ago and then to my surprise, my mum came out to my dad about being a lesbian, but the worst thing is that my girlfriend came out as a lesbian as well (That made completely no sense what so ever 'cause I swear she forced me to have sex with her all the time -_-). Now they're divorced, I have two mums and a very sexy guy, that I'm not dating, but who keeps trying to confess his love for me ^.^' its cute in a way... Also, my ex has a gf ^.^
> A lot of things sure happen in a month ^.^'
> 
> EDIT: I think I'm going through a more gay phase recently...



Fascinating


----------



## Ruastin (Dec 27, 2012)

Percy said:


> I just don't understand why parents disown people because they're not 100% heterosexual. You created the child, you should care for him/her no matter what.


Ill never forgive or forget my father
He was a dunk asshole and on top of that my step-mother and I always argued 
After he Disowned me i moved in with my mother... now I don't want to tell her

On a happier note I am looking for a nice part of America to move with a few furs in the area XD So far my ideas are Near Portland and near Seattle if your area is nice (I like the city for clubs) Tell me about it in a PM


----------



## xAngelStormx (Dec 27, 2012)

You could always move in with me, but I'm being too forward  + I live in France at the moment...


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## Ruastin (Dec 27, 2012)

Its going to be a tough choice...


----------



## nonconformist (Dec 28, 2012)

I'm pretty sure everyone at my school knows that I'm not straight, and then about an eighth of the school knows I'm trans, partly because I don't make a big deal out of it at all- but I tried to tell my mother about the not-straight thing, and she flipped out. Which was bad. So I'm not even going to think about her finding out that her daughter isn't actually a daughter at all and hopefully just keep the issue covered up until I turn 18.


----------



## Percy (Jan 4, 2013)

Welp, I just came out to my sister as gay.
She took it well.


----------



## Magick (Jan 5, 2013)

That's good to hear ^^


----------



## Saga (Jan 5, 2013)

Percy said:


> Welp, I just came out to my sister as gay.
> She took it well.


My sister is a lesbian so I never had that problem. =P


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Jan 5, 2013)

Percy said:


> Welp, I just came out to my sister as gay.
> She took it well.



Very good to hear. I'm glad you are feeling more confident in this thing.


----------



## Tableside6 (Jan 5, 2013)

Percy said:


> Welp, I just came out to my sister as gay.
> She took it well.



I wish I could say the same. I won't tell my sister. If I told her, she would punch me in the face. She would punch me in the face, not because of telling her I was gay, but the reason would be is because I talked to her.

But everyone else wouldn't care. Also I don't care about my little sister.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Jan 5, 2013)

Tableside6 said:


> I wish I could say the same. I won't tell my sister. If I told her, she would punch me in the face. She would punch me in the face, not because of telling her I was gay, but the reason would be is because I talked to her.
> 
> But everyone else wouldn't care. Also I don't care about my little sister.



Lol. The reason I'm not telling my mom is because of the "I told you so" points she'll get.

I must always be one step ahead of her. >:[


----------



## Percy (Jan 5, 2013)

Tableside6 said:


> I wish I could say the same. I won't tell my sister. If I told her, she would punch me in the face. She would punch me in the face, not because of telling her I was gay, but the reason would be is because I talked to her.
> 
> But everyone else wouldn't care. Also I don't care about my little sister.


Oh, little sisters.

Mine's an older sister. After telling her, she told her ex, who I mentioned earlier is gay himself. Apparently he wasn't terribly surprised, either. XD


----------



## Tableside6 (Jan 5, 2013)

Percy said:


> Apparently he wasn't terribly surprised, either. XD



I told someone I was gay and they weren't suprised at all. I started thinking, should I be offended or just don't care. So as a joke, I said, "What's that suppose to mean?!"


----------



## DJ-Fragon (Jan 5, 2013)

My family thought I was asexual. They were a bit surprised to find out I was actually bi.


----------



## Magick (Jan 5, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> Lol. The reason I'm not telling my mom is because of the "I told you so" points she'll get.
> 
> I must always be one step ahead of her. >:[



That sounds like one of the reasons I didn't directly tell my dad, though his reaction would've been more along the lines of an episode of "Seinfeld"

Me: "Dad, I'm gay."
Dad: "Alright, I understand and thank you for being honest with me about it."
Me: "Yeah."
Dad: "Not that there's anything wrong with it."
Me: "I know, dad." 
Dad: "I mean if it's who you are then it's who you are..."
Me: "I know, dad."
Dad: "The sexual preference of each per-..." 
And that's where I stop listening


----------



## NightWolf20 (Jan 6, 2013)

Well, my friend was nothing shy of shocked to find out I'm bi. Church was awkward today. XD


----------



## Saiko (Jan 7, 2013)

NightWolf20 said:


> Well, my friend was nothing shy of shocked to find out I'm bi. Church was awkward today. XD


Just wait 'till you have a creepy, sociopathic Sunday-school classmate hitting on you. THAT is awkward.
And more than a little infuriating.

Congrats, though! ^_^


----------



## NightWolf20 (Jan 7, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Just wait 'till you have a creepy, sociopathic Sunday-school classmate hitting on you. THAT is awkward.
> And more than a little infuriating.
> 
> Congrats, though! ^_^



Thanks. I don't look forward to that. XD
It was funny because he overreacted so much. He was like, "You need to talk to the preacher NOW! And you probably shouldn't be leading the praise team until this is sorted out." I talked to the preacher and got some good advice. He was totally cool about it, though I never heard someone stutter so much. haha My friend apologized later and all is well.

Still haven't come out to my parents yet. I'm dreading that. :/


----------



## Ruastin (Jan 8, 2013)

NightWolf20 said:


> Well, my friend was nothing shy of shocked to find out I'm bi. Church was awkward today. XD



Good for you! Glad it went okay

And I recently got in contact with my dad and am having lunch with him tomorrow he says he is sorry for "overreacting"
I will forgive him over time
Some scars just take longer to heal


----------



## Percy (Jan 8, 2013)

Ruastin said:


> And I recently got in contact with my dad and am having lunch with him tomorrow he says he is sorry for "overreacting"
> I will forgive him over time
> Some scars just take longer to heal


Like I've told you, don't make any decisions too quickly.


----------



## NightWolf20 (Jan 8, 2013)

Ruastin said:


> Good for you! Glad it went okay
> 
> And I recently got in contact with my dad and am having lunch with him tomorrow he says he is sorry for "overreacting"
> I will forgive him over time
> Some scars just take longer to heal



Thanks, buddy. Glad to hear things are looking up. I know it must have hurt to hear it from him (just thinking about it makes me teary-eyed), but the fact that he's reaching out like this shows he still loves you. He may have just gotten swept up in shock or something. I don't know. Just try spending time with him, fix the relationship. It'll get better. And if you ever need to vent or whatever, I'm sure you've got family that'll listen, plus there's people here, myself included. 



> Like I've told you, don't make any decisions too quickly.



This^100! Whatever you do, take your time and think.


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## Ruastin (Jan 8, 2013)

NightWolf20 said:


> Thanks, buddy. Glad to hear things are looking up. I know it must have hurt to hear it from him (just thinking about it makes me teary-eyed), but the fact that he's reaching out like this shows he still loves you. He may have just gotten swept up in shock or something. I don't know. Just try spending time with him, fix the relationship. It'll get better. And if you ever need to vent or whatever, I'm sure you've got family that'll listen, plus there's people here, myself included.
> 
> 
> 
> This^100! Whatever you do, take your time and think.




Oh trust me is gonna take a LONG time to forgive him


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## merveilleuse (Jan 13, 2013)

Yeah, coming out is not an option. lol


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## Ryuu (Jan 15, 2013)

I've been clueing in my roomates..... i think they got it, cause today one of them said "you like him dont you! You want to ram him don't you!"    ---- I didn't awnser.... He then LOL'ed and was all OMG your so gay arent you... _noawnser_ .... it got all quite and then i could tell they were thinking that over...


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## Percy (Jan 15, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> I've been clueing in my roomates..... i think they got it, cause today one of them said "you like him dont you! You want to ram him don't you!"    ---- I didn't awnser.... He then LOL'ed and was all OMG your so gay arent you... _noawnser_ .... it got all quite and then i could tell they were thinking that over...


Well, if you don't answer, you'll just make them automatically assume you are.
Of course, unless that's what you were intending...


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## Saiko (Jan 20, 2013)

So this weekend, my college sent me and some friends on a trip to San Francisco to conduct a couple interviews about the church and it's stance on homosexuality.

The catholic priest said gay relationships are fine! Hell he even encourages them over the alternatives of trying to be "straight" or being celibate.

The stipulation was no sex, but dammit _a catholic priest said I can have a boyfriend!_ ^____^


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## Percy (Jan 20, 2013)

Saiko said:


> So this weekend, my college sent me and some friends on a trip to San Francisco to conduct a couple interviews about the church and it's stance on homosexuality.
> 
> The catholic priest said gay relationships are fine! Hell he even encourages them over the alternatives of trying to be "straight" or being celibate.
> 
> The stipulation was no sex, but dammit _a catholic priest said I can have a boyfriend!_ ^____^


Why can't all religious people think this way? >_>


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## Saiko (Jan 22, 2013)

Percy said:


> Why can't all religious people think this way? >_>


The same reason not all people are good at making laws. They get wrapped up in what is written rather than what is intended. Yes, the Bible has verses that condemn a generalized concept of homosexuality; but people forget the spiritual purpose of marriage is the companionship, growth, and comfort that cannot come from celibacy or false love. Perhaps overall a heterosexual relationship is indeed ideal, but many of us just can't do it. It doesn't work, so we take the next best thing in a sense.

Not enough people are capable of and willing to understand this concept. :/


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## Ryuu (Jan 24, 2013)

Well, still haven't told anyone else.... -.-


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## Saiko (Jan 27, 2013)

That moment when your naive friend asks why you don't just get a sex change since you're gay. >_>

It's okay. I got revenge by answering _all_ his questions. >:3


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## Kazooie (Jan 31, 2013)

My final bastions of innocence have been breached. Oops.


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## Ryuu (Feb 2, 2013)

I think my best bro in Kc is going to support my coming out


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## Ryuu (Feb 4, 2013)

Just told 5 more friends.  oh MY GOSH


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 4, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> Just told 5 more friends.  oh MY GOSH



All at once? Damn. Ballsy...


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## Ryuu (Feb 4, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> All at once? Damn. Ballsy...



Facebook..


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## Saiko (Feb 4, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> Just told 5 more friends.  oh MY GOSH


Congrats!

I guess you've noticed it's a bit addictive? xD


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## Ryuu (Feb 4, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Congrats!
> 
> I guess you've noticed it's a bit addictive? xD




Im fixing to just say it to everyone over my wall.  i have it typed up, but its hard to post


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 4, 2013)

I haven't told anyone that I'm bi yet, because I think Bi people are perceived as a little more freakish than others. I get the feeling everyone would get the idea that I want to get in bed with them... The only other openly bi guy at my school got completely ostracized and people really don't like him. I'm not sure how my parents would take it, I'd like to think they'd take it well. The rest of my family, I don't mind if they dislike me for it. Their loss. I've been meaning to come out sometime, but I've been putting it off.


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## Ryuu (Feb 4, 2013)

I have the post loaded into my FB page.... but cant hit enter


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## James Darkglint (Feb 4, 2013)

I wish I'd known about this thread when I did first come out, and even again when I came out to my mother. 
Coming out *is* absolutely terrifying, and you do usually feel obligated to do so. No one can say what reaction they'll get. For instance, my mother chose not to believe it until I paid for my boyfriend to fly 2,000 miles and shake her hand. Thanks for sharing it.


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 4, 2013)

I'm not sure who to come out to first. I don't ask for advice from my mother or father on much, but I trust them. Then again, I feel that if I told my closest friends first, I would be taking a weight off my chest. I don't want peoples' views of me to chance ;-; Change is scary.


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## Ryuu (Feb 4, 2013)

this is so freakin' scary.


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## Ryuu (Feb 5, 2013)

I just came out over facebook. :whew:  yet unsure bout it


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## Percy (Feb 5, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> I just came out over facebook. :whew:  yet unsure bout it


Ryuu, I envy your bravery. I really do.


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 5, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> I just came out over facebook. :whew:  yet unsure bout it



Congrats, Ryuu. I think you'll fnd that no matter what comes your way in life, its better to be honest about things you believe in. Esp. your own sexuality.


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## DJ-Fragon (Feb 5, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> I just came out over facebook. :whew:  yet unsure bout it



Congrats. That takes real balls to do that.


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## Kivaari (Feb 5, 2013)

Rivers Bluetail said:


> I'm not sure who to come out to first. I don't ask for advice from my mother or father on much, but I trust them. Then again, I feel that if I told my closest friends first, I would be taking a weight off my chest. I don't want peoples' views of me to chance ;-; Change is scary.


When I've had to come out about something, I'd say the first person to tell is someone close that you are sure will accept you. Having someone that knows and doesn't hate you for it is great, and makes coming out to others a bit less scary.


I suppose I still haven't really come out as a lesbian. But after coming out thinking I was gay, and then more recently coming out after realizing I'm trans, I'm guessing that once more will just result in people not really caring. Might as well do it anyways.

And congrats Ryuu! Such a relief to just get it out in the open.


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 5, 2013)

Kivaari said:


> When I've had to come out about something, I'd say the first person to tell is someone close that you are sure will accept you. Having someone that knows and doesn't hate you for it is great, and makes coming out to others a bit less scary.



That's true. I'm not sure I really wanna tell too many people yet, I'll start with a close friend or two. Thanks ^^

And great job Ryuu! I truly envy your bravery with that.


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## Ryuu (Feb 5, 2013)

So i got this from the parents: We knew from some comment you once made or at least had a good idea...


That comment has me relieved, yet in a state of shock


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 5, 2013)

I'm going to tell my mother later when she gets home. Wish me luck '^^


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## Ryuu (Feb 6, 2013)

told a cp-worker/friend. he was ok with it.


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 6, 2013)

Told my mother last night, she was totally okay with it  She said she had rehearsed the speech, and thought that I wasn't straight anyways... lol


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## Tyrbis (Feb 6, 2013)

Coming out for the first time was very difficult for me. I told my best friend over the facebook chat. I TOOK 2 HOURS! Now I'm like "Meh. I'm bi if you need to know". I never felt like I have to say "HEY EVERYBODY! I'M BISEXUAL!". I told couple of my classmates but they didn't take me seriously. It's getting quite annoying actually. Maybe I'll try again tomorrow. I'm trying to make it look casual. For example someone says "I think non-straight people are sick!" I'm responding "I feel quite well". I'm not afraid of bullying at school. No one would be brave enough . I'm in engineering class so all my classmates are male. Some of them are homophobes but as I said not very brave ones. Unfortunately not everyone has that much luck . It's good idea to ask people how they feel about gays before telling them. Effect of coming out mostly depends on your position in class/school. Self-confidence helps a lot. Makes bullying much harder. I wish you guys the best of luck. I hope no one will ever face ostracism and aggression because of their sexual orientation.


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## Saiko (Feb 6, 2013)

My rule of thumb, at least for starting out, is keeping it to a need-to-know basis and beginning with your best friend. Yes... it will be awkward and will still require courage, but generally that will be the person with the best balance between risk and chance of accepting. If coming out worries you, then they're probably your safest option.

I personally consider the ideal reaction to be able to joke about it with you, have fun with it. This is what my friends and I do constantly. I make fun of them for being dorks. They retort with me being gay. The result is that after only ~18 months of identifying as gay, I'm very casual about it and will generally "come out" to someone with an off-hand statement... Or I'll blurt it out in a snarky retort.


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## Tyrbis (Feb 6, 2013)

In case you have no idea how to come out on facebook:


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## Ryuu (Feb 6, 2013)

Tyrbis said:


> In case you have no idea how to come out on facebook:




ummm no, here is mine. 

--------------------------------


To whom it may concern,
I am writing this message to everyone I know because for the last six years I have been living a shell of myself. Ever since high school I would let people decide who I was and what I believe in. Well, that stops today. When I moved out here to Colorado I told myself that I would become the person I always wanted to be, Not the person that everyone else wanted me to be. I have been through so much moving out here and this is the next step in becoming the â€œmeâ€ I have always wanted to be!  This is very hard for me to be writing but it must be said. To some of my longtime friends and perhaps some family, this will be of no surprise to you, yet others may be totally shocked. I hope you all can find it in your heart to accept me for who I am.
        To everyone that gets this I hope it doesn't affect our relationship, it shouldn't. Let me tell you a secret, Iâ€™m gay.  I have been for many years and most of my current friends know this, but moving forward in life requires all of you to know this. This has been eating me up for 6 years now, and I can't take it anymore. Every time I have heard someone say something bad about gays or a pathetic gay joke it has secretly pissed me off, because most people donâ€™t know that true love comes in many forms.  
My phone will be off for several days because I donâ€™t want to get five million messages! Think of what you post, and I hope youâ€™re open to things. 
   I am so happy for finally writing this that I am literarily jumping up and down inside my skin. I feel I can act as myself now and be exactly who I want to be. Now this doesnâ€™t mean ill be a different person, it just means some aspects of me will change, finally. Im 24 and its time I took control of my life and climbed out of the cocoon that is my former life. 

Thank you all for reading this and I hope you all accept me for who I am!


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 6, 2013)

I only worry that my friends would consider me less of a "bro"... as stupid as that sounds. I guess it wouldn't feel the same without stupid homophobic jokes and everybody being same minded.


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## Saiko (Feb 6, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> ummm no, here is mine.


I d'awwwed :3


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 6, 2013)

It was really touching, I d'awwwed a bit too


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## Riho (Feb 6, 2013)

I told my D&D group a couple days ago.
They were really accepting, and another one admitted to being a brony.
While I was doing it, though, I was sweating and praying to Nagoth the worm god that they wouldn't screw me over.


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## Ryuu (Feb 6, 2013)

same here. i was on skpe and i was FREAKIN out!


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 6, 2013)

This thread is 106 pages of solid gold. I usually hate stickied topics but keep it coming, lads!


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 7, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> This thread is 106 pages of solid gold. I usually hate stickied topics but keep it coming, lads!



When _are_ you coming out, TA :V


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 7, 2013)

I come out about once a year on Facebook to see who pays attention. Hilarity always ensues.


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## Ryuu (Feb 7, 2013)

There was no Drama when i came out.... odd


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 7, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> There was no Drama when i came out.... odd



There's a message in there, Ryuu. The same message I've been talking about to every miserable self-conscious, awkward in-the-closet teenager who comes out to these forums.


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## Bloodshot_Eyes (Feb 7, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I come out about once a year on Facebook to see who pays attention. Hilarity always ensues.


lol


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## Ryuu (Feb 7, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> There's a message in there, Ryuu. The same message I've been talking about to every miserable self-conscious, awkward in-the-closet teenager who comes out to these forums.



i know, it wasn't funny so i just ignored it.


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## Aleu (Feb 7, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> There's a message in there, Ryuu. The same message I've been talking about to every miserable self-conscious, awkward in-the-closet teenager who comes out to these forums.


No one cares when you come out because you're straight. Pretty much everyone assumes whoever they meet is straight unless proven otherwise. Maybe if you consider other people's points of view, you wouldn't be such a self-obsessed twat that no one likes.


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## 905 (Feb 7, 2013)

I came out eons back, years and years ago, and my folks were like "No shit, we have known for ever, its about time you've figured it out, faggot _we_ were getting concerned we would have to tell you." And then, when I came out to my friends, my best friend said, and I quote "Thats it? I don't care bro, I was worried you were dieing or something. Thats fine, no biggie" and several people were like 'huh, really? you were the last person we would have thought..' and no one really cared. Which, is fine with me.


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## ToxicCoffinBat (Feb 7, 2013)

*I came out when I was 16 years old, I openly  told my family that I was Trans and of course I got the whole, its a phase bs. 
Well my mother began abusing me over this and that she was just plain crazy anyway... So I moved out when I was 18 and stayed away from my family. I disowned them cause none of them  would respect me. So I built a family that loves and cares about me, accepting me for me out of my friends because those are who matter honestly. Now a days, I am a supporter of gay and trans rights! and I love speaking with those who are having issues with coming out or issues related to this in general.
*


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## Kivaari (Feb 7, 2013)

Yeah, unfortunately being disowned is pretty common for trans people... My family still loves me, but my parents still don't accept the fact that I am a woman. Really wondering how long it will take for that to change...


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## Rivers Bluetail (Feb 8, 2013)

I told my dad, step mom, and a few friends last night. My dad and stepmom weren't really bothered, except that I kept them away from the football game to explain it. So I'm not sure they cared  My friends gave me mixed answers though. A few were totally okay with it, and generally didn't mind. A couple got really mad and refuse to speak with me now. I don't really understand, but whatever. If someone's terrified of bi guys, then I really don't need to hang out with them anyways.


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 9, 2013)

Kivaari said:


> Yeah, unfortunately being disowned is pretty common for trans people... My family still loves me, but my parents still don't accept the fact that I am a woman. Really wondering how long it will take for that to change...



Post-op probably. Anything before that is kind of spitting in biology's eye.


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## Kahze (Feb 9, 2013)

Nobody really minded in my case. My friends, family, and coworkers know i'm a furry and they didn't really mind!


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## Conker (Feb 9, 2013)

I think my best friend is wondering if I'll come out as gay at some point, since now and then he brings it up. "I wouldn't care if you were gay you know. Stupid people bother with getting offended at mundane shit like that these days" which is a nice sentiment, but I'm not gay, or at least I don't think I am  I'm still operating under "asexual", and I don't see the need to come out as that. 

I think he finds it hard to wrap his head around, that someone wouldn't want to date or find a person to fuck.


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## Ssssstarbok (Feb 10, 2013)

New to the thread, so I'll start with my extremely exciting story.

I basically chickend out on "National Coming Out Day", so I had to do it the day afterwards.
It was actually quite awkward, as I started off by asking my mom what day it was yesterday.
To which she replied "Thursday, why?" ...-.-

After I told her it was National Coming Out Day, she put 1 and 1 together.
The drama that ensued, was basically non-excistant.
My mother told me "Whatever makes you happy" and she told my dad a couple of days later.
My dad was surprised at this news, as I was always one for all the "boyish" stuff. ( soccer, getting dirty etc. ) but handled it really well! 

*TL;DR *shit was boring as hell.


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## Kivaari (Feb 10, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Post-op probably. Anything before that is kind of spitting in biology's eye.


Which is pretty damn stupid, genitals should not matter to anyone who isn't dating me. I really hope it isn't that long, as trying to afford all this on a bike mechanic's wages is pretty difficult...


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 10, 2013)

Kivaari said:


> Which is pretty damn stupid, genitals should not matter to anyone who isn't dating me. I really hope it isn't that long, as trying to afford all this on a bike mechanic's wages is pretty difficult...



Damn science and it's specificity, making transexuality hard for the self-important.


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## Percy (Feb 10, 2013)

Kahze said:


> Nobody really minded in my case. My friends, family, and coworkers know i'm a furry and they didn't really mind!


This isn't a thread about "coming out" as a furry. This is about actually coming out, as in as gay, bi, trans, or whatever else.


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 10, 2013)

This sorta made my day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UACK93xF-FE

And now for one related to coming out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNjuB_lwgQE


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## Ssssstarbok (Feb 10, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> This sorta made my day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UACK93xF-FE
> 
> And now for one related to coming out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNjuB_lwgQE



George Takei is a pretty cool guy. :3
And that last video, I love it way too much.


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## badlands (Feb 13, 2013)

going for a drink with my best friend on Friday, I'm trying to build up enough courage to tell her that im gay. 

i've  got to start somewhere and she's the most likely out of all my friends  and family to be accepting. (she's already asked me twice if i was gay, I  said no as i wasn't ready for people to know back then).

lot's of stress...


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 13, 2013)

Son, lots of stress is having credit card debt due to college, 14 credits worth of courses breathing down your neck, not enough hours at work, and living on 2 meals a day with 6 hours of sleep on average a night to try and make ends meet. You being afraid of telling your obviously accepting friend that you're gay is not stress. That's barely even a trivial dilemma.


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 13, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Son, lots of stress is having credit card debt due to college, 14 credits worth of courses breathing down your neck, not enough hours at work, and living on 2 meals a day with 6 hours of sleep on average a night to try and make ends meet. You being afraid of telling your obviously accepting friend that you're gay is not stress. That's barely even a trivial dilemma.



Just because she's the most likely to accept him doesn't mean she's "obviously accepting" though. (Esp. not in places that frown on such things) I think he should just be calm about the situation and he'll do fine.


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 13, 2013)

I can't imagine a realistic situation where he wouldn't "do fine". Generally speaking you can see people who reject homosexuals coming a mile away, to the point it's not even a question.


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## badlands (Feb 13, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Son, lots of stress is having credit card debt due to college, 14 credits worth of courses breathing down your neck, not enough hours at work, and living on 2 meals a day with 6 hours of sleep on average a night to try and make ends meet. You being afraid of telling your obviously accepting friend that you're gay is not stress. That's barely even a trivial dilemma.



my friends arnt the ones that's worrying me (well they are but not that bad), hence why I'm going to tell them first. Its my family that scares me.


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 13, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I can't imagine a realistic situation where he wouldn't "do fine". Generally speaking you can see people who reject homosexuals coming a mile away, to the point it's not even a question.



There are homosexuals that believe that we shouldn't have to keep our mouths shut around such people though. That by coming out it says "Yeah, I'm gay. It's not going to change. I am not ashamed of it" That's why its tough to do esp. to those who disapprove and its ungodly hard to bring yourself to tell a family member who's relationship might change forever afterwords.


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 13, 2013)

It's like being an atheist (the two camps of rejection have massive overlap). You gotta choose who you decide to openly tell. I choose to tell pretty much everyone cause if they don't like it it's open season on their backwards religion. Some people can't do that, so they should probably just not tell people they're not comfortable with knowing. Or better yet not even address it unless it's brought up. Because, as I've said, if you don't start nothin' there won't be nothin'. If you come out to someone you *know* isn't gonna like it and then whine about them not liking it you're a moron.


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 13, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> It's like being an atheist (the two camps of rejection have massive overlap). You gotta choose who you decide to openly tell. I choose to tell pretty much everyone cause if they don't like it it's open season on their backwards religion. Some people can't do that, so they should probably just not tell people they're not comfortable with knowing. Or better yet not even address it unless it's brought up. Because, as I've said, if you don't start nothin' there won't be nothin'. If you come out to someone you *know* isn't gonna like it and then whine about them not liking it you're a moron.



I think we can both agree that if a person has very little confidence in themselves they shouldn't be attracting negativity into their lives. I think that Badlands will be fine though because he seems to have thought this stuff out.


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## Ryuu (Feb 15, 2013)

In a Relationship with a great guy right now.... (sorry man)  


Just want to scream it out! 

:sigh: 


Also, pretty much came out to my boss today, he got the drift, cause i was singing Owl city when he walked in... lol He just walked back out.


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## Command Leader (Feb 15, 2013)

Billions of dollars were spent to keep me from coming out.

It happened anyway.


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## Plantar (Feb 16, 2013)

Finally learning what I'm into and I'm pretty much gay. :U


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## TeenageAngst (Feb 16, 2013)

I miss the old days when being gay meant something. You weren't just gay, you were a goddamn red blooded homosexual. You fucked men in the ass for fun. There wasn't this namby pamby rainbow and pride parade crap. You went out there, you found yourself a 200lb hunk of man meat, and you went to town while he held onto the backboard or passenger seat or telephone pole for dear life. People got hurt, people got killed, it was pretty damn gay.


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## Plantar (Feb 16, 2013)

Sounds like I had all this fun and I don't remember. >:I


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## Butters Shikkon (Feb 16, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I miss the old days when being gay meant something. You weren't just gay, you were a goddamn red blooded homosexual. You fucked men in the ass for fun. There wasn't this namby pamby rainbow and pride parade crap. You went out there, you found yourself a 200lb hunk of man meat, and you went to town while he held onto the backboard or passenger seat or telephone pole for dear life. People got hurt, people got killed, it was pretty damn gay.



oh....murr?


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## Hewge (Feb 16, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I miss the old days when being gay meant something. You weren't just gay, you were a goddamn red blooded homosexual. You fucked men in the ass for fun. There wasn't this namby pamby rainbow and pride parade crap. You went out there, you found yourself a 200lb hunk of man meat, and you went to town while he held onto the backboard or passenger seat or telephone pole for dear life. People got hurt, people got killed, it was pretty damn gay.



This post, and this thread, is 100% pure brilliance.


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## Ryuu (Feb 20, 2013)

I must say, those first days were rough, but now... i am SOOOOO happy that i came out!


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## Magick (Feb 23, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I miss the old days when being gay meant something. You weren't just gay, you were a goddamn red blooded homosexual. You fucked men in the ass for fun. There wasn't this namby pamby rainbow and pride parade crap. You went out there, you found yourself a 200lb hunk of man meat, and you went to town while he held onto the backboard or passenger seat or telephone pole for dear life. People got hurt, people got killed, it was pretty damn gay.


You forgot tied to a bed :V


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## Ryuu (Mar 3, 2013)

been a while now. Things still looking good. coming out to more and more people, went to 1st gay bar. Great. My Relationship with Ruastin is great and i cant wait to see him this summer and go to RMFC with him!


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## Percy (Mar 4, 2013)

I'm thinking about maybe coming out to my friends in about 2 1/2 weeks, since we're going to an LGBT nightclub as a big group of people. I haven't committed to it yet though.


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## Yago (Mar 4, 2013)

Percy said:


> I'm thinking about maybe coming out to my friends in about 2 1/2 weeks, since we're going to an LGBT nightclub as a big group of people. I haven't committed to it yet though.



^^ Go for it, IMO. And have fun at the club. Best of luck, either way! 

I think I'm going to come out to my brother or my father this week. Or both. Hopefully neither, but circumstances, circumstances, of course...


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## TeenageAngst (Mar 4, 2013)

I love how when people come out it's always in situations where the person being told either accepts it readily right away or is pretty much spurned as an asshole there on the spot, usually by at least one other person in the room. If a friend did that to me, like with other people around, I'd just walk out without a word. I wouldn't stop being friends with them or anything, just give them a few days to stew in their disappointment and self-consciousness before I tell them it's cool.


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## BRN (Mar 4, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I love how when people come out it's always in situations where the person being told either accepts it readily right away or is pretty much spurned as an asshole there on the spot, usually by at least one other person in the room. If a friend did that to me, like with other people around, I'd just walk out without a word. I wouldn't stop being friends with them or anything, just give them a few days to stew in their disappointment and self-consciousness before I tell them it's cool.



Why? You'd look like an asshole. Not the tough kind of movie-hero asshole, just... an asshole.


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## TeenageAngst (Mar 4, 2013)

I know, it'd be delicious. So worth it, just to see the look of sheer disappointment on their face after all their strategic planning and weeks of fretting culminate in dismal failure. Or so they'd think anyway, I'd let them off the hook after a few days. They'd deserve it for trying to manipulate me anyway.

Now if they came out to me in passing it'd all be good. "Umm, I dunno if I told you but I'm gay." "Really? Huh, okay."


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## badlands (Mar 4, 2013)

Percy said:


> I'm thinking about maybe coming out to my friends in about 2 1/2 weeks, since we're going to an LGBT nightclub as a big group of people. I haven't committed to it yet though.



Best of luck, i hope it all goes well.

i'm pretty much out to all my friends now, went quite well. Apart from one who started asking all sorts of awkward (personal) questions.

Not sure when i'll tell my family though.


----------



## BRN (Mar 4, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I know, it'd be delicious. So worth it, just to see the look of sheer disappointment on their face after all their strategic planning and weeks of fretting culminate in dismal failure. Or so they'd think anyway, I'd let them off the hook after a few days. They'd deserve it for trying to manipulate me anyway.
> 
> Now if they came out to me in passing it'd all be good. "Umm, I dunno if I told you but I'm gay." "Really? Huh, okay."



Oh, that's cool. Sorry, I think I got the wrong end of the stick!

See, way back in this thread I talked about how I came out. It was just in passing, and she ended up drinking all night for a couple of nights, things weren't great. But it was still a lot easier than I know it would have been if I'd done the whole, "I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE" thing. Shame she was my mom. 

Thing is, folks coming out really need more support than you'd think. It's the cessation of compartmentalisation. That's more painful than you think, and it's not just about stewing in dissapointment - "awhh..." - it's more like a psychological struggle to reconcile your existence with orthodoxy. Not so easy.


----------



## Ricky (Mar 4, 2013)

See, I was lucky. The bar was set pretty low in the first place.

As long as I wasn't in prison I don't think my parents even cared one way or the other.

So, moral of the story. Get in a bunch of trouble first.

Then when you come out, it'll seem like nothing ;3


----------



## Rivers Bluetail (Mar 4, 2013)

So I'm out to anyone that asks now, except my relatives (barring parents). I'm kinda dreading it, because I don't want to make a big deal out of it, and it's sorta a pain in the ass. Haha, I suppose I could make a huge scene out of it for sh*ts and giggles.


----------



## badlands (Mar 4, 2013)

i can agree with TA in the fact that making a scene is not a good idea.

when i came out to my friends it was one to one when we went outside the pub for a smoke.

one to one is best, it boils down to the old adage "a person is smart but people are dumb panicky dangerous animals"


----------



## Ryuu (Mar 4, 2013)

i came out over facebook, to everyone. at once. it was good, and had no issues with it


----------



## Rivers Bluetail (Mar 4, 2013)

Oh I blocked all my relatives on facebook forever ago. There's always that one aunt "Oh Rivers, I haven't seen you in so long! How's school? Got a girlfriend yet?" They're still family though. I'm gonna tell them over spring break.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 5, 2013)

SIX said:


> Thing is, folks coming out really need more support than you'd think. It's the cessation of compartmentalisation. That's more painful than you think, and it's not just about stewing in dissapointment - "awhh..." - it's more like a psychological struggle to reconcile your existence with orthodoxy. Not so easy.



Six, you're a homosexual, not a woman. Get off the cross.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Mar 5, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Six, you're a homosexual, *not a woman*. Get off the cross.



._. TA, this is why you aren't getting laid...


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 5, 2013)

TA's not getting laid for a lot of reasons. What I say on internet message boards is the least of them.


----------



## DarrylWolf (Mar 5, 2013)

I wonder if getting badges like these counts as "coming out"? I know it's not homosexuality but I often feel that I'm a little mismatched when it comes to musical tastes and hobbies.

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10002424/


----------



## Ryuu (Mar 5, 2013)

DarrylWolf said:


> I wonder if getting badges like these counts as "coming out"? I know it's not homosexuality but I often feel that I'm a little mismatched when it comes to musical tastes and hobbies.
> 
> http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10002424/



not even close.


----------



## Ryuu (Mar 5, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> TA's not getting laid for a lot of reasons. What I say on Internet message boards is the least of them.



*giggles* getting laid isn't that hard... lol  You guys make it seem so difficult.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 5, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> *giggles* getting laid isn't that hard... lol  You guys make it seem so difficult.



You're talking to a person who's lucky to be sober and not-institutionalized.


----------



## Rivers Bluetail (Mar 5, 2013)

DarrylWolf said:


> I wonder if getting badges like these counts as "coming out"? I know it's not homosexuality but I often feel that I'm a little mismatched when it comes to musical tastes and hobbies.
> 
> http://www.furaffinity.net/view/10002424/


Hey man, no reason to come out about lovin' music. That's for everyone to enjoy, regardless of race, age, and sex. 


Ryuu said:


> *giggles* getting laid isn't that hard... lol  You guys make it seem so difficult.


Yeah man, anyone can go out and get a cheap hooker. They're all over the place :v


----------



## BRN (Mar 6, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Six, you're a homosexual, not a woman. Get off the cross.



But I'm English and eloquent and have a sexy voice and wear suits and stuff. If I don't say lots of words, my facade of civility melts to nothing. :C


----------



## Tygrax (Mar 6, 2013)

i'm slowly coming out openingly as bisextual. most of my friends know. I plan to tell my sister but im still unsure how to tell my christian/penicostel/baptist parents...... i've even lost friends over it. Some cannot accept my being bi, they say im obviously gay, wich there is a big difference, and some who are gay themselves told me that if i cannot just addmit im gay and stop insulting his sextuality i cant be friends with him.. so im not. I'm proud to be me


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## Rivers Bluetail (Mar 6, 2013)

In my opinion, coming out as bi (at least for a guy) is more awkward than coming out as gay. To most people, being gay is a lot simpler to comprehend. They can compartmentalize gay guys off in some corner. 
But when people figure out I'm bi, they're almost always kinda confused (you like guys... and girls?) 
Most of the time they are like "you're into girls... and guys?"


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## Llamapotamus (Mar 7, 2013)

Rivers Bluetail said:


> In my opinion, coming out as bi (at least for a guy) is more awkward than coming out as gay. To most people, being gay is a lot simpler to comprehend. They can compartmentalize gay guys off in some corner.
> But when people figure out I'm bi, they're almost always kinda confused (you like guys... and girls?)
> Most of the time they are like "you're into girls... and guys?"



Yeah, bisexuality isn't such a friendly concept to those who prefer to live in their own little black and white world. It adds a nice splash of ambiguity to the notion of "you're either this or that". That's one reason why I haven't said anything, I don't want to know how many of my friends or family have this mindset and would resent me for ruining it. Such a hassle...


----------



## Spatel (Mar 8, 2013)

Yeah, prepare to be called a gay closet case for the rest of your life. Also don't expect gay rights activists to always stand up for you; sometimes they'll throw you under the bus (ex: Dan Savage). People get this strange idea in their minds that being bi is awesome. Maybe 200 years from now it will be. Right now it kinda sucks though, particularly for guys.


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## badlands (Mar 8, 2013)

being bisexual tends to throw up the "captain Jack Harkness" of "if its got a pulse" image with most people


----------



## Valnyr (Mar 8, 2013)

Good lord, people are still discussing this?!


----------



## Llamapotamus (Mar 9, 2013)

Valnyr said:


> Good lord, people are still discussing this?!



What!? Not our fault it's still relevant...


----------



## Kalmor (Mar 9, 2013)

Valnyr said:


> Good lord, people are still discussing this?!


Maybe because it's important for the people involved?


----------



## PuffyCatgirl (Mar 17, 2013)

So, is this for coming out for _anything_?

Because I'm pretty sure no matter what I revealed myself as, none of the people I care about would give a shit.

"Hey mom, uh, I'm actually a Furry."
"Cool. Where's my rent?"


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 17, 2013)

Gotta love prudence.


----------



## ownbones (Mar 23, 2013)

i came out to my parents just fine

i'm gay. my dad is trans, and my mom is very progressive 

i can't say the same for my grandparents though. they would probably disown me


----------



## Percy (Mar 23, 2013)

I came out to a few friends in a clever way.

We went to what's essentially a gay club (although it's very popular amongst all people) last night as a huge group of people. When I was walking back, I told a few people that "that place made me gay". They laughed it off, thinking nothing strange about it. xD


----------



## Ranguvar (Mar 23, 2013)

Good news everyone, this self proclaimed "raging heterosexual" might actually be pretty gay. I guess I have been around you people too much :V


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 23, 2013)

The furry fandom has definitely taken me from a 0 to a 1, possibly touching 2.


----------



## Ranguvar (Mar 23, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> The furry fandom has definitely taken me from a 0 to a 1, possibly touching 2.


 Yeah I kind hovering around a 3 right now..........you beautiful, beautiful bastards


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 23, 2013)

Whenever I feel the gay creepin' up on me I try to visualize what it'd be like to actually engage in homosexual copulation. Then I promptly feel the urge to bathe.


----------



## Ranguvar (Mar 23, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Whenever I feel the gay creepin' up on me I try to visualize what it'd be like to actually engage in homosexual copulation. Then I promptly feel the urge to bathe.


But TA, whenever _I_ feel the gay creepin' up on me I visualize what it'd be like to actually engage in homosexual copulation. Then I promptly touch myself. OH GAWD.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Mar 23, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Whenever I feel the gay creepin' up on me I try to visualize what it'd be like to actually engage in homosexual copulation. Then I promptly feel the urge to bathe.



So you want to remove your clothing thinking about gay sex...you came to the right thread I guess. :V


----------



## Llamapotamus (Mar 23, 2013)

Percy said:


> I came out to a few friends in a clever way.
> 
> We went to what's essentially a gay club (although it's very popular amongst all people) last night as a huge group of people. When I was walking back, I told a few people that "that place made me gay". They laughed it off, thinking nothing strange about it. xD



Sounds kinda misleading to me, as if it were meant as a joke not to be taken seriously. I'm sure there's a lot of contextual stuff I'm missing though. Do you think you really got the point across?


----------



## Percy (Mar 23, 2013)

Llamapotamus said:


> Sounds kinda misleading to me, as if it were meant as a joke not to be taken seriously. I'm sure there's a lot of contextual stuff I'm missing though. Do you think you really got the point across?


Meh, I don't know. I've implied it subtly quite often, so maybe. I mean, I haven't openly discussed my sexuality anyway. o-o

Wouldn't be surprised if they took it as a joke though.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 23, 2013)

I'm still waiting for one of yous guys to have like, really unaccepting but at the same time really passive parents. Like you come out to them and they're like, "God damn it, well, there goes the posterity." And like they're always dropping quick jabs about it out of nowhere but at the same time they still do your laundry and cook you dinner and stuff. I say this because, after listening to the people in this thread, I know at no point would it become too unbearable for the homosexual to move out or actually do anything about it, but at the same time they'd come on here and complain *constantly* about stuff their parents said, and it'd always be hilarious.


----------



## Mikhal18 (Mar 23, 2013)

^Honestly. I don't know how hilarious it can be for you or someone else.
You're either  1) someone hardly closeted, and fear to come out because your parents/friends may beat the crap out of you/fear to be stared everytime you go out, or 2) you're just a plain AH. I believe you're leaning towards option 2.
Oh well.



TeenageAngst said:


> Whenever I feel the gay creepin' up on me I try to visualize what it'd be like to actually engage in homosexual copulation. Then I promptly feel the urge to bathe.


As for this. This just proofs what kind of person you are: a poet, when you keep your mouth shut.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Mar 23, 2013)

I miss MySpace. This thread is MySpace. I feel happy here.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Mar 23, 2013)

I have some troubles...
I mean, I really want to come out as bi to people, but, so far I've only accomplished this online, and none to my friends...
I mean, I drop a lot of hints, but....
I think the worst thing is that, I have this really big crush on two of my bandmates, one guy and one girl, and, I see them everyday, and it's a bit suckish, but I manage...


----------



## Llamapotamus (Mar 24, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I miss MySpace. This thread is MySpace. I feel happy here.



Yeah, MySpace was the shit around '06 - '07...


----------



## Distorted (Apr 11, 2013)

After some "Exploratory Behavior" at college, I slipped and told my mom about a guy I liked on campus. We spent the whole week yelling, crying, arguing, and (to my reluctance) praying. My folks think I'm still sick and don't shy away from saying that I'm going down the "wrong path" (i.e. straight to Hell, actually). They deny any prior statements of me being gay and continue to talk of the family I will one day have. Lovely...

Despite my family's harshness, my friends think it's cool and funny. I don't really like to talk about it, but it comes up sometimes and I can't help but feel naked. I mean, I'm still a virgin for Pete's sake. Sometimes my friends take liberties with me. One girl just changed right in front of me, and some of the guys I know try to flirt with me. It's been about a year since I officially came out, but I'm still not used to things.

I think my closest friend might be bisexual though. He keeps saying he is, but I don't think he understands what he's saying sometimes. We're supposed to be moving in with eachother so....I guess I'll find out. :3


----------



## Taleu (Apr 12, 2013)

I came out to my dad yesterday.
it was after a huge argument and chain of topics, but his reply was, "uhhh... I know... Heh"

I thought I was stealth gay...

should have known that's how he would react...

(I'm 21 btw)


----------



## Kalmor (Apr 12, 2013)

Taleu said:


> I came out to my dad yesterday.
> it was after a huge argument and chain of topics, but his reply was, "uhhh... I know... Heh"
> 
> I thought I was stealth gay...
> ...


Well done on coming out to your dad. I have to ask an off topic question though... Why is your name so pink?


----------



## CaptainCool (Apr 12, 2013)

Raptros said:


> I have to ask an off topic question though... Why is your name so pink?



Oh good, so I am not seeing things  That was my initial reaction as well^^


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (Apr 12, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I'm still waiting for one of yous guys to have like, really unaccepting but at the same time really passive parents. Like you come out to them and they're like, "God damn it, well, there goes the posterity." And like they're always dropping quick jabs about it out of nowhere but at the same time they still do your laundry and cook you dinner and stuff. I say this because, after listening to the people in this thread, I know at no point would it become too unbearable for the homosexual to move out or actually do anything about it, but at the same time they'd come on here and complain *constantly* about stuff their parents said, and it'd always be hilarious.


 My family are your typical republicans, but they wouldn't beat me if I told them I was gay, which I am not, but I am just saying. I know people who are not allowed to dress a certain way, even if their parents were democrats or just liberals.


----------



## Hinalle K. (Apr 12, 2013)

Raptros said:


> Well done on coming out to your dad. I have to ask an off topic question though... Why is your name so pink?


the power of gay is so strong within that one it got to his username
true story


----------



## Taleu (Apr 12, 2013)

My name's not pink. You're all insane. -in denial-

...

Okay I have a confession... My name is pink, dad.

Naw. I'm an IRC mod so I have some semblance  of a staff affiliation.
(unless its just some kind of joke at my expense T w T)


----------



## Machine (Apr 12, 2013)

Now I want my name colored like a rainbow because of Taleu.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 12, 2013)

Taleu said:


> My name's not pink. You're all insane. -in denial-
> 
> ...
> 
> ...



ovo That particular shade pleases me.


----------



## Percy (Apr 12, 2013)

Machine said:


> Now I want my name colored like a rainbow because of Taleu.


I want mine in red and blue letters. :C

Though rainbow would be nice too... even though my name doesn't have seven letters in it. >.>


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 13, 2013)

Percy said:


> I want mine in red and blue letters. :C
> 
> Though rainbow would be nice too... even though my name doesn't have seven letters in it. >.>



I'd actually like your name in black and white. :3


----------



## Percy (Apr 13, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> I'd actually like your name in black and white. :3


That'd be cool too. x3

Back on topic: I'm still trying to drop subtle hints to my friends. Hopefully someone will watch on.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 13, 2013)

I've recently come out to two people at work. I was gonna tell everyone if it came up, but my new boss is a really religious prick and sadly, I don't trust my company to do right by me. Sorta looking for another job actually.


----------



## Mullerornis (Apr 13, 2013)

Taleu said:


> My name's not pink. You're all insane. -in denial-



Actually you're right. It's magenta.


----------



## Taleu (Apr 14, 2013)

Percy said:


> That'd be cool too. x3
> 
> Back on topic: I'm still trying to drop subtle hints to my friends. Hopefully someone will watch on.




The way I came out to my friends was... I suggested we play the Tell Everyone Your Darkest Secret game in a tent outside in the suburbs. Real sublte. Real clever. Or it would have been if I hadn't just suddenly burried my head in the sleeping bag and yelled, "IM IN LOVE WITH WILL"


----------



## Saiko (Apr 14, 2013)

Meanwhile in Mississippi:

I think I'll have to come out to my parents a third time. -_-


----------



## Ranguvar (Apr 14, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Meanwhile in Mississippi:
> 
> I think I'll have to come out to my parents a third time. -_-


Third time's the charm.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 14, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Meanwhile in Mississippi:
> 
> I think I'll have to come out to my parents a third time. -_-



...A third time?


----------



## Ryuu (Apr 14, 2013)

all my friends know, my parents and my BF too.  yummy little tiger. ^.^


----------



## Saiko (Apr 14, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> ...A third time?


Yes. Both times so far, they've taken my not talking about it any for it not "being a problem anymore" in a sense. So they still think I'm going to have a wife one day.

And yet, after 18 months.... I STILL LIKE GUYS!
Next time I plan on just flat out telling them that I'm gay, and we're going to have to disagree on the topic.


----------



## Ranguvar (Apr 14, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Yes. Both times so far, they've taken my not talking about it any for it not "being a problem anymore" in a sense. So they still think I'm going to have a wife one day.
> 
> And yet, after 18 months.... I STILL LIKE GUYS!
> Next time I plan on just flat out telling them that I'm gay, and we're going to have to disagree on the topic.



Meh, I told my brother I like dicks and he told me "whatever floats your gay ass boat, faggot". Also, my parents keep asking me when I am going to bring a girlfriend home. So I figured once I got get a nice piece of man meat I'd tell them I bringing a girl over, and then wait for the lols.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 14, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Yes. Both times so far, they've taken my not talking about it any for it not "being a problem anymore" in a sense. So they still think I'm going to have a wife one day.
> 
> And yet, after 18 months.... I STILL LIKE GUYS!
> Next time I plan on just flat out telling them that I'm gay, and we're going to have to disagree on the topic.



...Wow.

I told my brother I'm dating a guy, btw.
He doesn't care, but he does want me to be careful, since I'm dating an older man(4 years older actually).


----------



## Saiko (Apr 14, 2013)

I'll probably tell my brother soon. Don't think he's quite ready yet, but I can see clearly that he'll be fine with it. The main thing is that I want him to build his own foundation of character rather than copy mine, which he is prone to do.

Hehe, I actually had the perfect opportunity to come out last night though. We were on minecraft together, and a skele shot me in the ass.
"Why do you like arrows up the butt so much? :V"


----------



## Ranguvar (Apr 14, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> ...Wow.
> 
> I told my brother I'm dating a guy, btw.
> He doesn't care, but he does want me to be careful, since I'm dating an older man(4 years older actually).



LOL jailbait.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 14, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> LOL jailbait.



Not as bad as someone else I know.
16 to 22.


----------



## Ranguvar (Apr 14, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> Not as bad as someone else I know.
> 16 to 22.


Well just don't get pregnant, k.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 14, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> Well just don't get pregnant, k.



BUT I HAVE NO WOMB!!!!!
Or female bits, they're squicky.


----------



## Saiko (Apr 14, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> BUT I HAVE NO WOMB!!!!!
> Or female bits, they're squicky.


You're a furry. Anything can happen. And if it somehow can't, it can always be drawn.~


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 14, 2013)

Saiko said:


> You're a furry. Anything can happen. And if it somehow can't, it can always be drawn.~



*sob*
But I dun wanna be Rule 63'd, or herm'ed.
I wanna be a male, with my male boyfriend. *sob*


----------



## Ranguvar (Apr 14, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> *sob*
> But I dun wanna be Rule 63'd, or herm'ed.


Too late I already have.


----------



## Zerig (Apr 14, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> So I figured once I got get a nice piece of man meat I'd tell them I bringing a girl over, and then wait for the lols.



Name the time and place, bubbie.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 14, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> Too late I already have.



*sob*


----------



## Ranguvar (Apr 14, 2013)

Zerig said:


> Name the time and place, bubbie.


OOOh, how about next Sunday? I could bring you to Church and we can confess our sins bby.


----------



## Zerig (Apr 14, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> OOOh, how about next Sunday? I could bring you Church and we can confess our sins bby.



Oh murr. 

Too bad I'm not allowed inside churches anymore. It's a shame, since I've always wanted to try getting down in a confessional booth.


----------



## Artillery Spam (Apr 15, 2013)

About a year or two ago I started realizing that I might actually like women _and_ men. But I didn't really go after these weird gay feelings for several reasons:

>Many people have thick skins. I'm not one of them. On the outside I seem hardened and bitter, but on the inside I'm soft and easily hurt. In short, I pussed out, frightened of what people make think of me If I had told them or they had found out. I invested my balls and bravery in many places and areas. Coming out (or straight-up admitting to myself that I was bisexual) wasn't one of them.

>For some reason, I thought these homosexual feelings were fucking stupid, random and in a way, downright wrong. While I no longer feel that sexual or romantic interaction between two men or two women is something to freak out about, I still can't see myself indulging in any of that shit. It's less of a "Wow that would be nasty as shit" kind of thing and more of a "This isn't you--why would you even do this?"

It gets to the point where if I come across that one-in-a-thousand gay pic that I actually like I literally become pissed off at myself for liking it. 

>Even if I was bisexual, I lean so far towards liking women that I might as well be a full-blown straight man. Boobs and ass do more for me than a dick ever could. I actually like being straight. I wouldn't like being bisexual.  

Even after mentally 'murdering' the hell out of my gay side, he still comes up every once and while to troll the shit out of me. 

Even to this day I deny that it's very possible that I'm bisexual, but all I'm really doing is lying to myself.

I'm probably being fake-straight at this point, but I am glad that I don't go around calling every single thing gay and saying 'no homo' every two seconds. 

That counts for something...right?


----------



## Saiko (Apr 15, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> >Even if I was bisexual, I lean so far towards liking women that I might as well be a full-blown straight man. Boobs and ass do more for me than a dick ever could. I actually like being straight. I wouldn't like being bisexual.
> 
> Even after mentally 'murdering' the hell out of my gay side, he still comes up every once and while to troll the shit out of me.


You are like... the polar opposite of me in this regard.

It's weird... I'm all gay-gay-gay-gay-gay and then POOF. "she might be sweet..."
Then back to gay~ <3


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 15, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> About a year or two ago I started realizing that I might actually like women _and_ men.



Called it :V Seriously, I did suspect on the gtwf...

Good for you, Tank. I think you'll feel better in time. You might just end up being mostly attracted to women, but I'm glad you're not as anxious about getting aroused by dudes. That sorta stress can really waste some good years for you.


----------



## Yago (Apr 15, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> About a year or two ago I started realizing that I might actually like women _and_ men. But I didn't really go after these weird gay feelings for several reasons:
> 
> >Many people have thick skins. I'm not one of them. On the outside I seem hardened and bitter, but on the inside I'm soft and easily hurt. In short, I pussed out, frightened of what people make think of me If I had told them or they had found out. I invested my balls and bravery in many places and areas. Coming out (or straight-up admitting to myself that I was bisexual) wasn't one of them.
> 
> ...



That's kinda how I started out.


----------



## Artillery Spam (Apr 15, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> Called it :V Seriously, I did suspect on the gtwf...
> 
> Good for you, Tank. I think you'll feel better in time. You might just end up being mostly attracted to women, but I'm glad you're not as anxious about getting aroused by dudes. That sorta stress can really waste some good years for you.



Was it really that obvious? How'd you know?


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 15, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> Was it really that obvious? How'd you know?



Well, sticking around the giant gayfest that is that forum for one. :V 

You took a lot of jokes in stride esp. the sexual ones. Most straight dudes I know are the "ew, don't even mention doing 'X' to me or I'll kick your ass!" I believe you made a post or two in the ass thread right? 99% dude ass in that one. 

You seemed aloof at times as well...like you were hiding something.


----------



## Magick (Apr 15, 2013)

Well, according to my friends I'm either an effeminate gay guy or a well disguised woman. Either way, a friend is now drawing me as a girl and my mate was laughing his tail off when I told him X3


----------



## Artillery Spam (Apr 15, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> Well, sticking around the giant gayfest that is that forum for one. :V
> 
> You took a lot of jokes in stride esp. the sexual ones. Most straight dudes I know are the "ew, don't even mention doing 'X' to me or I'll kick your ass!" I believe you made a post or two in the ass thread right? 99% dude ass in that one.
> 
> You seemed aloof at times as well...like you were hiding something.



I think only posted in the ass thread to make fun of Milo and call everyone in it weird lol.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 18, 2013)

Yago said:


> That's kinda how I started out.


And where did you end up?



			
				Artillery Spam said:
			
		

> >Even if I was bisexual, I lean so far towards liking women that I  might as well be a full-blown straight man. Boobs and ass do more for me  than a dick ever could. I actually like being straight. I wouldn't like  being bisexual.


Why not? It's fucking awesome. It's like being born in god mode. Yeah society sucks and a lot of people will think you're gay and in the closet and a lot of girls won't date you because they think you'll just leave them for a guy. It is not the _easiest_ life to live, but I think if you find a way to balance things without going insane it is perhaps the most rewarding.


----------



## Artillery Spam (Apr 20, 2013)

Spatel said:


> And where did you end up?
> 
> 
> Why not? It's fucking awesome. It's like being born in god mode. Yeah society sucks and a lot of people will think you're gay and in the closet and a lot of girls won't date you because they think you'll just leave them for a guy. It is not the _easiest_ life to live, but I think if you find a way to balance things without going insane it is perhaps the most rewarding.



Mostly because I've lived a straight life for the past 19 years. I don't really see any point in pursuing any homsexual relationships---especially if these feelings are _extremely _minor at this point in time. Because of that, the odds of me going after some cute guy or something are slim to none. Although I've pretty much accepted the fact that there's nothing I can do to change these feelings, I'm reluctant to pursue them or really even acknowledge them.

I guess I'm just scared of what people will think of me if they find out.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 20, 2013)

Well...
Always keep your options open to the slim chance of man love. 
Cause that's exactly how I felt before, accepting the fact, but never truly pursuing it.


----------



## Yago (Apr 21, 2013)

Spatel said:


> And where did you end up?
> 
> 
> Why not? It's fucking awesome. It's like being born in god mode. Yeah society sucks and a lot of people will think you're gay and in the closet and a lot of girls won't date you because they think you'll just leave them for a guy. It is not the _easiest_ life to live, but I think if you find a way to balance things without going insane it is perhaps the most rewarding.



Yay mega-late response.

My sexuality is stupidly ridiculously confusing and conditional. I technically classify under the demi-pansexual multipass rainbow random unicorns category. I usually just go with bisexual, but I lean so far heavily gay it's easier to simply state it that way.


----------



## Ricky (Apr 21, 2013)

Yago said:


> I technically classify under the demi-pansexual multipass rainbow random unicorns category.



Wow, you too? NO WAY!!!

And here I thought I was the only one... :roll:


----------



## Ryuu (Apr 22, 2013)

I want to curl up in a ball and act like nothing is wrong.... 

I had to move back home....


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 22, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> I want to curl up in a ball and act like nothing is wrong....
> 
> I had to move back home....



Sorry for being a bit insensitive, but, why is that bad?
Do your parents not accept you or something? Does it separate you from your mate?


----------



## Saiko (Apr 22, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> I want to curl up in a ball and act like nothing is wrong....
> 
> I had to move back home....


Yeah, same here. Couldn't get any job good enough to justify an apartment this summer, so I have to head back too... at least I have an internship set up, but I very strongly dislike going home. :/


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (Apr 22, 2013)

I still wonder why some gay people have to be afraid to come out to their liberal parents when you'd think they are more accepting than conservative parents. I hear people say their parents are not religious and accepting, but then are told not to watch certain tv/cartoon shows, dress a certain way, or get yelled at for being themselves.


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## Artillery Spam (Apr 22, 2013)

TheMetalVelocity said:


> I still wonder why some gay people have to be afraid to come out to their liberal parents when you'd think they are more accepting than conservative parents. I hear people say their parents are not religious and accepting, but then are told not to watch certain tv/cartoon shows, dress a certain way, or get yelled at for being themselves.



Some 'accepting' parents do a complete 180 when you out yourself to them.


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (Apr 22, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> Some 'accepting' parents do a complete 180 when you out yourself to them.


 I guess it's human nature. I still find it hard to believe that nobody is perfect, yet they try to preach shit on to others. Most people probably pretend to be accepting to get along with society. If you happen to be a conservative parent that still supports gay rights, you'd still get bashed, as long as you are anything but labeled conservative, you're fine. I guess it's reputation. My republican parents wouldn't flip if I told them I was gay, even though they don't support gay rights. I am not gay, but, I am just saying, my family seems okay with the idea, even if I told them. It could be just the nature of certain parents and families. My parents would simply just pray for me LOL.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 23, 2013)

So, my grandmother told my dad I was bi, for lack of better terms.
He's perfectly fine with it, cause I'm still his boy and all, and he wants to protect me from the people who just don't accept it.

Though I don't know how he found out about my boyfriend though...
Since I never told my grandmother about him....


----------



## Car Fox (Apr 23, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> Though I don't know how he found out about my boyfriend though...
> Since I never told my grandmother about him....



Chances are, he stumbled upon the info by accident.


----------



## Imperial Impact (Apr 23, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> I think only posted in the ass thread to make fun of Milo and call everyone in it weird lol.


LINK?


----------



## Spatel (Apr 24, 2013)

Yago said:


> Yay mega-late response.
> 
> My sexuality is stupidly ridiculously confusing and conditional. I technically classify under the demi-pansexual multipass rainbow random unicorns category. I usually just go with bisexual, but I lean so far heavily gay it's easier to simply state it that way.



Hmm... if you started out the same as Artillery Spam then this gets very interesting. I'm curious how you went from leaning so far heavily straight like Artillery Spam does to leaning so far heavily gay you might as well just be gay. What were the years in between like?

I suppose it's silly to ask really, when I probably already know the answer--going from 2-4 on the kinsey scale throughout the week. Mostly I guess it's difficult for me to imagine losing attractions I once had. I've only gained things, never lost them. I could see how I could 'gay' myself up to like a 4.5 or a 5 I suppose, if I had no emotional interest in women and just let that side of my attractions languish maybe. By the same token I could see how if I wanted to be straight I could probably shift my average to a 1 or 1.5

It's difficult to tell though if I just have aspergers and this is totally impossible for most people, or if this is actually normal for the human race and most are just totally oblivious to how robust their attractions really are (due to social stigma, or because they internalize the biological essentialist idea that homosexuality is programmed and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because that's what they believe about themselves).


----------



## miskey (Apr 24, 2013)

I don't think it's impossible to switch the average back to whatever it was. I mean, if you become gay or straight, it would only make sense that you can switch it back.

It might be kind of like, if you're drinking with a friend. You get a little tipsy and you both make out and undress. You have some feelings for each other but decide not to pursue the "relationship". But the next day you see a girl and go after her. Switching back is not that hard...unless that's just what a bisexual does...


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 24, 2013)

miskey said:


> I don't think it's impossible to switch the average back to whatever it was. I mean, if you become gay or straight, it would only make sense that you can switch it back.
> 
> It might be kind of like, if you're drinking with a friend. You get a little tipsy and you both make out and undress. You have some feelings for each other but decide not to pursue the "relationship". But the next day you see a girl and go after her. Switching back is not that hard...unless that's just what a bisexual does...



You don't "switch" or "turn" at all. You either are into something are you aren't.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 24, 2013)

I honestly believe sexuality is a fluid thing, you are neither one nor the other.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 24, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> You don't "switch" or "turn" at all. You either are into something are you aren't.



I think what you are saying is probably false.

Unless you're a pedophile I would contend that the body types you're attracted to now are a bit different than the ones you were attracted to as, say, a 14 year old. Back then you probably crushed on other 14 year olds, right? The difference between 14-year-olds and mid-20 somethings is pretty significant physically. Your brain must have gradually rewired itself to stay attracted to your age group. So something did 'turn'. For that matter, some people develop fetishes over time which gradually take over their sexuality and override it.

For instance there are women who find giving oral a huge chore, and then gradually it becomes one of their biggest turn-ons. There are men who would never put anything in their ass and find the idea a huge turnoff, but then gradually develop an acquired taste for getting pegged. So in some sense you're quite empirically wrong. It is possible to gain and lose turnons. The human brain is polymorphously perverse and the things that we associate with sexual desire have some aspect to them that is pliant over a long time.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 24, 2013)

Spatel said:


> I think what you are saying is probably false.
> 
> Unless you're a pedophile I would contend that the body types you're attracted to now are a bit different than the ones you were attracted to as, say, a 14 year old. Back then you probably crushed on other 14 year olds, right? The difference between 14-year-olds and mid-20 somethings is pretty significant physically. Your brain must have gradually rewired itself to stay attracted to your age group. So something did 'turn'. For that matter, some people develop fetishes over time which gradually take over their sexuality and override it.
> 
> For instance there are women who find giving oral a huge chore, and then gradually it becomes one of their biggest turn-ons. There are men who would never put anything in their ass and find the idea a huge turnoff, but then gradually develop an acquired taste for getting pegged. So in some sense you're quite empirically wrong. It is possible to gain and lose turnons. The human brain is polymorphously perverse and the things that we associate with sexual desire have some aspect to them that is pliant over a long time.



Hmmm. That's a very intriguing point. Tastes do change over time...but then I suppose that would make everyone basically bisexual at their core. Afterall, you never know what would set you off in that case.


----------



## Fallowfox (Apr 24, 2013)

On the subject of sexuality and 'gaying yourself up', the direction of the crown in the whirl of hair at the back of your head, which is beyond manipulation, is anticlockwise in around 8% of men in general, but in 30% of gay men. 

So this implies there certainly is a 'programed' bias in sexual orientation. Whether or not belief about oneself can force this bias one way or the other I don't know, certainly sexuality reassignment therapy is viewed as a psuedoscience. 

I suppose you would have to interview people on their position on the kinsey scale [by which I mean show them explicit images and measure their genital response] divided into 2 groups, one which had been informed that sexuality was innate, and a control group with no understanding. 

If the control group is more likely to respond to images of both sex than the inate group-which you might hypothesise should be more polarised, this would suggest the 'prophecy' you speak of.


----------



## Spatel (Apr 24, 2013)

Fallowfox said:


> On the subject of sexuality and 'gaying yourself up', the direction of the crown in the whirl of hair at the back of your head, which is beyond manipulation, is anticlockwise in around 8% of men in general, but in 30% of gay men.



Incorrect. The study that found that difference was *not scientific*. Two follow-up studies which were far more rigorous *failed to find a correlation between sexual orientation and hair whorl direction:*



> Klar (2004) surreptitiously recorded the direction of hair whorl at a  beach near Rehoboth Beach, Delaware that is popular among gay men. Out  of 272 men with single whorls, 29.8 percent had counterclockwise whorls.  This was a higher proportion than the 9.1 percent counterclockwise he  counted in 328 men from malls, stores, and the beach at Atlantic City,  most of whom would be straight. This result got a lot of attention in  the popular press (France 2007)  and is mentioned on a lot of web pages about "gaydar." However, two  more rigorous studies did not find a significant difference between gay  and straight men in the proportion of counterclockwise whorls. Rahman et  al. (2009) and Schwartz et al. (2010) separated gay and straight men  based on a questionnaire, not which beach they went to, and determined  their whorl type based on close examination, not from a distance. Rahman  et al. (2009) found 18 percent of gay and 14 percent of straight men to  have counterclockwise whorls, while Schwartz et al. (2010) found 19.7  percent in gay men and 17.2 percent in straight men. In both studies,  the observer  determined whether the whorl was clockwise or  counterclockwise without knowing whether the subject was gay or  straight, which may be an important difference between these studies and  that of Klar (2004).



I could go further than that. The finger length ratios which were thought to correspond to sexuality *have practically no correlation in men*, though they might mean something for transsexuals--which makes perfect sense as 2D:4D is strongly sexually dimorphic. Although the lower the ratio is relative to the average for your gender, it's more likely to mean you simply have asperger's.



			
				wikipedia on finger ratio said:
			
		

> Gay vs straight men,[SUP][75][/SUP]  but most studies find very little difference in digit ratio between gay  and straight men. One study found that gay men with several older  brothers tend to have different digit arrangements.[SUP][82][/SUP][SUP][84][/SUP] Some studies correlate male homosexuality and 2D:4D positively,[SUP][85][/SUP] others negatively.[SUP][86][/SUP]


[SUP]

[/SUP]
 And when one out of a pair of identical twins is gay, the other only has a *7% chance* of also being gay. Practically the same as the general population. The initial study that found a much higher rate was caused by families with two identical gay twins being much, much more likely to volunteer for psychological surveys involving sexuality. 

http://iserp.columbia.edu/sites/default/files/working_papers/2001_04.pdf


> *Discussion *
> The findings presented in this paper confirm some findings from previous research and stand in
> marked contrast to most previous research in a number of respects. First, we find no evidence for
> intrauterine transfer of hormone effects on social behavior. *Second, we find no support for **
> ...





All of that said; I do think there is an epigenetic component (there is a strong link between skewed X-inactivation in mothers of homosexual men), and I think that epigenetic activation is good predictor for where your orientation *starts* when you first develop an interest in sex, but not necessarily where it ends up, due to the plasticity of the human brain. For instance, someone might be programmed biologically to find one sex beautiful, but gradually their sex drive is redirected to the other sex through fetishistic mechanisms.


----------



## Ryuu (Apr 24, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> Sorry for being a bit insensitive, but, why is that bad?
> Do your parents not accept you or something? Does it separate you from your mate?



I moved from Denver to KC.... and the people around here are not very accepting. Im not going to change and hide it either. 

My parents are accepting, sort of. they avoid the subject and dont want to talk about it. its fine when im 1K miles away but living here with them its clear


----------



## LogicfromLogic (Apr 26, 2013)

Spatel said:


> I could go further than that. The finger length ratios which were thought to correspond to sexuality *have practically no correlation in men*, though they might mean something for transsexuals--which makes perfect sense as 2D:4D is strongly sexually dimorphic. Although the lower the ratio is relative to the average for your gender, it's more likely to mean you simply have asperger's.
> 
> [SUP]
> 
> ...



While I agree with part of that, recently they discovered white matter in a transgender/sexual's brain the same place as their natural born female/males. Example;

Females to males have white matter in the same place in their brain that natural born males do, they have however, estrogen/testosterone (sorry if I misspelled that, not very good with grammar I will admit) still in their bodies because they were born a different sex than what their mental status is. 

Maybe I am wrong but at least I put a shot out there to gain knowledge.


----------



## Yago (Apr 26, 2013)

Spatel said:


> Hmm... if you started out the same as Artillery Spam then this gets very interesting. I'm curious how you went from leaning so far heavily straight like Artillery Spam does to leaning so far heavily gay you might as well just be gay. What were the years in between like?
> 
> I suppose it's silly to ask really, when I probably already know the answer--going from 2-4 on the kinsey scale throughout the week. Mostly I guess it's difficult for me to imagine losing attractions I once had. I've only gained things, never lost them. I could see how I could 'gay' myself up to like a 4.5 or a 5 I suppose, if I had no emotional interest in women and just let that side of my attractions languish maybe. By the same token I could see how if I wanted to be straight I could probably shift my average to a 1 or 1.5
> 
> It's difficult to tell though if I just have aspergers and this is totally impossible for most people, or if this is actually normal for the human race and most are just totally oblivious to how robust their attractions really are (due to social stigma, or because they internalize the biological essentialist idea that homosexuality is programmed and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because that's what they believe about themselves).



Well, for years I was rather bigoted (family influence, pretty sure there's quite a few of us here on FAF that started this way). As I got older I ditched prejudices and I eventually started supporting gay rights and marriage. I was basically asexual for the longest time, in the sense that I was really rather indifferent. I was never really the type to check out an attractive woman, I'd just note they were pretty and that was as far as I cared. I kind of attributed that to a low libido and late onset of puberty, rather than anything else. After I did end up developing some sort of sex drive, which was considered "average" albeit on the very low side for average, I was straight oriented. I watched straight or lesbian porn most the time. After awhile I started noticing I couldn't watch certain porn videos, not because of an unattractive woman, but if the man was fugly, /abort mission. I kind of got a little nervous, it was confusing, and eventually it got to the point where I actually watched exclusively gay content. It was fantastic, but really disconcerting and confusing so I avoided it like the black plague and focused more upon lesbian porn or solo videos at this point so I wouldn't have a male to look at. Kind of continued like that for awhile, then I sat in Spanish class one day, looked over, and thought "Damn, Donovan is fucking hot, would tap that." and then I don't remember the rest of the week because I kind of went into a denial based stupor because I realized he's a dude. Once I got over that little bit of identity crisis I started trying to explore my sexuality a little more (I was free of prejudices at that point, at least consciously anyways, not so sure about subconscious), and eventually just got more and more gay oriented. There's still a couple of rare occasions where I find a woman attractive, but honestly, I'm fairly certain it would take either one of my random "straighter" days, or a powerful emotional bond to actually have a successful relationship. So I'm basically gay at this point.


----------



## Saiko (Apr 26, 2013)

Spatel said:


> I could go further than that. The finger length ratios which were thought to correspond to sexuality *have practically no correlation in men*, though they might mean something for transsexuals--which makes perfect sense as 2D:4D is strongly sexually dimorphic. Although the lower the ratio is relative to the average for your gender, it's more likely to mean you simply have asperger's.


*reads, does a little research, and looks at his*
Huh... I always thought a longer 2D was normal. 
It looks like mine's around 1.00 - 1.03. >w<


----------



## Spatel (Apr 26, 2013)

Yes most people do think that until you point it out to them. My ratio is .94 but I never noticed and thought the index fingers were longer, just because I used them more.


----------



## Arterian21 (Apr 28, 2013)

Still IN the blasted closet im afraid. Looking for a way to break out but honestly, I have no idea what id be doing then. Not an extrovert, not a bar going guy, dont like dancing, etc. And being the only gay guy ive ever known means I have no gaydar whatsoever.

Theres always an LGBT community center on the other side of the freaking city >.<...maybe one day ill work up the courage to go inside and...well...id...tbh i haven't the faintest idea what I would do after that. Should i? Or just go in and improv from then? oh well, at least nowadays im in a position where i can at least consider HOW im going to come out. Rather than figuring out ways to hide it.


----------



## Mullerornis (Apr 29, 2013)

Hope you get the confidence you need.


----------



## Ryuu (May 1, 2013)

Walk in and be yourself. Stop hiding it because if you hide it long enough it will tear you apart inside!


----------



## Ranguvar (May 1, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> Walk in and be yourself. Stop hiding it because if you hide it long enough it will tear you apart inside!


IDK, I like my closet, it's warm and cozy.


----------



## Ricky (May 1, 2013)

Arterian21 said:


> Theres always an LGBT community center on the other side of the freaking city >.<...maybe one day ill work up the courage to go inside and...well...id...tbh i haven't the faintest idea what I would do after that. Should i? Or just go in and improv from then? oh well, at least nowadays im in a position where i can at least consider HOW im going to come out. Rather than figuring out ways to hide it.



Usually they host social events.

I'd go to something that looks interesting and socialize with the people you meet, there.

They probably have a calendar. You should go ask ^^


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## Artillery Spam (May 2, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> IDK, I like my closet, it's warm and cozy.



^


----------



## Milo (May 3, 2013)

I'm out to everyone I know.

I just don't know anyone


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## Butters Shikkon (May 3, 2013)

Milo said:


> I'm out to everyone I know.
> 
> I just don't know anyone



Deep man. Also, good to see you back on faf again.


----------



## Ryuu (May 4, 2013)

So the other day i walked into a place to apply for a job and the receptionist just stared at me when i walked in like i was some sort of crazy. It was really awkward having to talk to her after that. 



Still got the interview. ^.^


----------



## Schwimmwagen (May 4, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> So the other day i walked into a place to apply for a job and the receptionist just stared at me when i walked in like i was some sort of crazy. It was really awkward having to talk to her after that.
> 
> 
> 
> Still got the interview. ^.^



...what were you dressed like?


----------



## Ryuu (May 4, 2013)

Gibby said:


> ...what were you dressed like?



Jeans...shirt.... nothing bad considering the job i was applying for was a labor intensive job.  She stared like i was wearing a fur suit. hahahaha


----------



## CatterHatter (May 5, 2013)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> Like, really flamboyantly gay. Kinda've like this.
> 
> At least watch it until 1:00.



This... this made my night. Oh hell.


----------



## Ryuu (May 7, 2013)

The job the lady stared at me when i walked in..... yaaaaaa. Got the job.


----------



## CatterHatter (May 8, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> The job the lady stared at me when i walked in..... yaaaaaa. Got the job.


Cool, congrats man!

Alright, I posted on here a long time ago. Here's an update.

I have told a few people now that I am gay in this order: my girlfriend, my twin, a good friend, and my mom.
Just trying to take it a step at a time since I am too shy and introverted to just announce it to everyone. So far the main thing impeding my progress is worries about my father. He's a preacher... so yeah...

As for the other people I have told: my girlfriend took it surprisingly well and we are still really good friends. My twin, well, I only did not tell her sooner cause she does not have the best track record of keeping things to herself. After I told her, she told two of her friends, and then her boyfriend later without talking to me about it. Thankfully, it does not seem to be a big deal. My mom... well that was tougher. She is antagonistic and tells me I am in sin and all that. If that was all, it really would not bother me but she had to go and say that my boyfriend and I CAN'T be in love because it's not natural and it's all about sex and that my boyfriend can support me.

Thanks mom for throwing my nearly five year relationship in the trash. And straight people don't have relationships based only on sex or money? I don't expect her to understand, but it does hurt a little that she would demean my boyfriend and I being together just because she does not approve. She tells me I'm not gay and that this is just a phase I'm going to go through. I told her that it would only hurt her and I both if she stayed in denial. It hurt me for long enough dealing with my own denial.

Anyway, that aside. I'm still dealing with moral ramifications since I am a Christian, but at the same time much of me does not feel like my boyfriend and I being together is wrong. He is the sweetest guy I know and truly cares for me and what is best for me. We are romantic and intimate, and we always work things out if we argue or have any problems. So even with my doubts I can't give him up. :}

I'll just keep trying to choose the right time and right people to tell so I can get out of this damn "closet."

EDIT: Oh, and to add... I do have some trouble dealing with other gay men if they are well... fruity. I'm not a homophobe, believe me I've gotten over that, it is just I personally do not like when people act out. It makes me uncomfortable and this applies to any form of acting out. Talking with a lisp, having floppy wrists, calling other guys "girlfriend," and so on, many times I feel like it is just a form of acting out and calling attention to oneself. So this keeps me from befriending some gay guys.


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## Mullerornis (May 11, 2013)

> Anyway, that aside. I'm still dealing with moral ramifications since I  am a Christian, but at the same time much of me does not feel like my  boyfriend and I being together is wrong.



Just learn hebrew and greek and you'll see that the Bible originally was not homophobic.

Then again, I fail to see why someone would preffer dogma over free spirituality.


----------



## CatterHatter (May 13, 2013)

Mullerornis said:


> Just learn hebrew and greek and you'll see that the Bible originally was not homophobic.
> 
> Then again, I fail to see why someone would preffer dogma over free spirituality.



EDIT: Oh, misunderstood something. My connotation for dogma (specific application of certain rules in a religion by a group) clashed with its denotation in this context. I assume now that you mean dogma as in any organized religion with rules versus free spiritual exploration and growth? I dunno man. I've accepted Christ; simple as that.

I'm just trying to eschew backwards things I was taught as a child from having a dogmatic preacher for a father. I'd love to learn other languages. Hebrew and Greek would be great, and I also want to learn French and Japanese. Maybe Gaelic, but it seems even more complicated to me than Japanese. Just gotta take the time out to learn other languages. I do know some Latin and Greek, but just a lot of words not how their grammatical rules work.


----------



## septango (May 13, 2013)

CatterHatter said:


> EDIT: Oh, and to add... I do have some trouble dealing with other gay men if they are well... fruity. I'm not a homophobe, believe me I've gotten over that, it is just I personally do not like when people act out. It makes me uncomfortable and this applies to any form of acting out. Talking with a lisp, having floppy wrists, calling other guys "girlfriend," and so on, many times I feel like it is just a form of acting out and calling attention to oneself. So this keeps me from befriending some gay guys.



im fairly certain thats just a cry for attention, otherwise idk i've only ever met one person like that and most gays i've met are just regular folk


----------



## Mullerornis (May 13, 2013)

CatterHatter said:


> EDIT: Oh, misunderstood something. My connotation for dogma (specific application of certain rules in a religion by a group) clashed with its denotation in this context. I assume now that you mean dogma as in any organized religion with rules versus free spiritual exploration and growth? I dunno man. I've accepted Christ; simple as that.
> 
> I'm just trying to eschew backwards things I was taught as a child from having a dogmatic preacher for a father. I'd love to learn other languages. Hebrew and Greek would be great, and I also want to learn French and Japanese. Maybe Gaelic, but it seems even more complicated to me than Japanese. Just gotta take the time out to learn other languages. I do know some Latin and Greek, but just a lot of words not how their grammatical rules work.




To me, dogma is restrictive to actual growth and even connection to the divine. But do as you please.

What I mean is that in hebrew and greek those verses are hilariously non-homophobic. Learn the languages that build the Bible, and you'll be a much less conflicted person.


----------



## Saiko (May 13, 2013)

So... last week my dad linked me to this: http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/r...sexual-condition-can-it-be-changed-prevented/.

I got home Saturday night, and they had me crying withing three hours...


----------



## Ranguvar (May 13, 2013)

Saiko said:


> So... last week my dad linked me to this: http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/r...sexual-condition-can-it-be-changed-prevented/.


"Male homosexuality, though, often involves extremely promiscuous sex;  sometimes one mate has hundreds of sexual partners over a lifetime. Male  homosexual practices include mutual masturbation, oral sex, and anal  intercourse."
Awesome. Oh and fuck this bitch and the pseudoscience she references. I ain't homosex because my parents were failures or I didn't go to church enough. I don't need to be cured nor does any other gay person.


----------



## Saiko (May 13, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> "Male homosexuality, though, often involves extremely promiscuous sex;  sometimes one mate has hundreds of sexual partners over a lifetime. Male  homosexual practices include mutual masturbation, oral sex, and anal  intercourse."
> Awesome. Oh and fuck this bitch and the pseudoscience she references. I ain't homosex because my parents were failures or I didn't go to church enough. I don't need to be cured nor does any other gay person.


Not one thing in that article describes me, and they should know that. :/


----------



## Dazreiello (May 25, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> Oh and fuck this bitch and the pseudoscience she references. I ain't homosex because my parents were failures or I didn't go to church enough. I don't need to be cured nor does any other gay person.



Yea, it really isn't some choice you pop out of nowhere someday in your life. I believe your estrogen levels determine that from birth and there isn't really anything you can do about that, or rather there isn't anything you SHOULD do about it. Alot of people just need to accept that homosexuality is something that comes with you from birth, atleast more often than not. My brother is a proud homosexual, while I'm practically 100% hetero and raised in christian environments, I've NEVER judged him or anyone for that even when I first found out. 

I believe science has a lot to say about how Homosexuality isn't something you just do, or something you can just get out of, and I believe if there is a God, the God I know wouldnt give a damn and love his homosexual children all the same.


----------



## BadgerBrox (May 26, 2013)

Well, I came out rather a long time ago.  

I told my Mum when I was 17, apparently she'd known since I was 10 - which is interesting as I didn't know at that time!  I didn't tell my Dad til I was 19 cos he'd always made homophobic comments - turned out he did them in jest.  I never told my Nana technically but she knows...

I didn't come out at school as the 5th formers and younger really bullied a sixth-former when he came out.  And despite my year (the 5th formers) being bad at that time, they've all been fine since; turned out 17 out of a year group of 91 were gay or gay-leaning bisexuals (all boys school)...

At uni I came out in second term in general, although some knew in first term.  Never really a problem.  It helped that my college chaplain was gay I think.

I am still hesitant at coming out at another church I go to, though many know, because my partner is worried how a lot of people there would react.

And I have found myself of late as a sort of coming-out agony aunt for younger friends.


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## TheMetalVelocity (May 26, 2013)

I actually looked at fursuit pictures with dicks sticking out of them and I liked it. That's really closest I can become to being attracted to guys, but other than that, once the fursuit's off, then it's a turn off.


----------



## Kalmor (May 26, 2013)

TheMetalVelocity said:


> I actually looked at fursuit pictures with dicks sticking out of them and I liked it.


Why the hell do you keep digging yourself into a BIGGER hole? Seriously...


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (May 26, 2013)

Raptros said:


> Why the hell do you keep digging yourself into a BIGGER hole? Seriously...


 If it's okay for people to come out, I thought it's okay for me as well.


----------



## Kalmor (May 26, 2013)

TheMetalVelocity said:


> If it's okay for people to come out, I thought it's okay for me as well.


No, no, no. Being gay is fine, but you keep bringing up this fursuit sex thing......


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (May 26, 2013)

Raptros said:


> No, no, no. Being gay is fine, but you keep bringing up this fursuit sex thing......


 But isn't that just picking and choosing? -_-. I figure it technically has something to do with it, since it's the only thing that involves males that i like.


----------



## Kalmor (May 26, 2013)

TheMetalVelocity said:


> But isn't that just picking and choosing? -_-.


You complain about not being liked then you go out and say you like an _*incredibly*_ taboo subject within the fandom. Nice going.


----------



## Machine (May 26, 2013)

TheMetalVelocity said:


> But isn't that just picking and choosing? -_-. I figure it technically has something to do with it, since it's the only thing that involves males that i like.


There's this thing called discretion.

You already killed the General Confessions thread because of this, for fuck's sake.


----------



## Fallowfox (May 26, 2013)

Spatel said:


> Incorrect. The study that found that difference was *not scientific*. Two follow-up studies which were far more rigorous *failed to find a correlation between sexual orientation and hair whorl direction:*
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Thanks for updating me. I was not aware of the problems with the initial hair sworl test.


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (May 26, 2013)

CatterHatter said:


> EDIT: Oh, and to add... I do have some trouble dealing with other gay men if they are well... fruity. I'm not a homophobe, believe me I've gotten over that, it is just I personally do not like when people act out. It makes me uncomfortable and this applies to any form of acting out. Talking with a lisp, having floppy wrists, calling other guys "girlfriend," and so on, many times I feel like it is just a form of acting out and calling attention to oneself. So this keeps me from befriending some gay guys.


 Same. It's like staring into a woman's soul when you look at them, LOL. You never know, maybe they are a woman inside, which is why they are attracted to men (obviously being a hetero woman inside?), unless it's some kind of submissive act, I don't know. When I think about it, it makes me get confused about my gender for a split second, because I am thinking about how their brain works and you picture what it will be like to be in their shoes. I don't know if you've seen my posts on here, but I have actually made a thread about it, which is basically me saying I can't get over shit like that and it makes me feel uncomfortable. It kind of messes with my head a little. I know people on skype that got mad at me for calling a transgendered person a sir by accident multiple times, because a lot of times, you view them how they originally were. Maybe it's my OCD, I don't know, certain things just don't click with me and freak me out.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (May 26, 2013)

Raptros said:


> You complain about not being liked then you go out and say you like an _*incredibly*_ taboo subject within the fandom. Nice going.



It's as if he posts what he does just to get a rise out of ppl and to get threads derailed...hmmmm....

 Sure makes you think...




BadgerBrox said:


> Well, I came out rather a long time ago.





BadgerBrox said:


> I told my Mum when I was 17, apparently she'd known since I was 10 - which is interesting as I didn't know at that time! I didn't tell my Dad til I was 19 cos he'd always made homophobic comments - turned out he did them in jest. I never told my Nana technically but she knows...
> 
> I didn't come out at school as the 5th formers and younger really bullied a sixth-former when he came out. And despite my year (the 5th formers) being bad at that time, they've all been fine since; turned out 17 out of a year group of 91 were gay or gay-leaning bisexuals (all boys school)...
> 
> ...




I love to hear these type of stories. My folks were great when I came out too. They knew for a long time too mostly because they are a gay and lesbian themselves.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (May 26, 2013)

Oh, speaking of this, somehow or other, I ended up coming out to my friends Saturday. It was weird, apparently two of them experimented before... Which I think is rather weird, because the two that said this were ages 18 and 14/15, but I didn't question it.


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## elegastaanval (May 29, 2013)

try coming out when your parents watch fox news and support the tea party


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## TheMetalVelocity (May 29, 2013)

elegastaanval said:


> try coming out when your parents watch fox news and support the tea party


 LBGT people watch fox news and support the tea party, well...some. I am not entirely right wing at all or keep true to those values and I still watch fox, not that I believe everything they say, because most of the time it's about obama being the bad guy for everything. 


Are your parents abusive? If not, then you can probably look up to them and tell them carefully. They might not be happy with it or at least in the beginning, but the worst my family will do is pray and argue with me about my spiritual life lmao.


----------



## Distorted (May 29, 2013)

elegastaanval said:


> try coming out when your parents watch fox news and support the tea party



If I saw Bill O'Riley on the street I'd kick his ass alongside Ludacris  and Kanye West. We could have an old fashioned curbstomp and tell that  S.O.B. how full of fecal matter he is. WHODEWHOOOOOOO!!!


----------



## Spatel (May 31, 2013)

Raptros said:


> You complain about not being liked then you go out and say you like an _*incredibly*_ taboo subject within the fandom. Nice going.


You make it sound like he's talking about cub porn or something considering the degree to which you overreacted.

It's not a big deal. I've heard of TMV's situation before. A couple other furs described something similar, either in this thread or the previous one. Fetishes can sort of... overpower one's innate sexuality I'd say.


----------



## Kalmor (May 31, 2013)

Spatel said:


> You make it sound like he's talking about cub porn or something considering the degree to which you overreacted.
> 
> It's not a big deal. I've heard of TMV's situation before. A couple other furs described something similar, either in this thread or the previous one. Fetishes can sort of... overpower one's innate sexuality I'd say.


A better way I should've put it was that it was incredably taboo on these forums rather than the fandom as a whole. It's still however, not very well accepted by the fandom. It's the source of all the bad press afterall.


----------



## elegastaanval (May 31, 2013)

Distorted said:


> If I saw Bill O'Riley on the street I'd kick his ass alongside Ludacris  and Kanye West. We could have an old fashioned curbstomp and tell that  S.O.B. how full of fecal matter he is. WHODEWHOOOOOOO!!!



if i had to chop off my dick to see that happen, i would do it


----------



## Fallowfox (May 31, 2013)

Raptros said:


> A better way I should've put it was that it was incredably taboo on these forums rather than the fandom as a whole. It's still however, not very well accepted by the fandom. It's the source of all the bad press afterall.



TMV is attracted to men if they wear fetish costumes. Big whoop? 
It's not the most eloquently worded post, but of all the things he has said that offend people it is the least provocative one. x3


----------



## freerider (Jun 3, 2013)

Huh. Could never tell if I was or wasn't. I'm always wondering what it's like IRL, but you know, where I live and the people here, I could not do a thing.
I forced myself to think of myself as straight.
Oh well.


----------



## Saga (Jun 3, 2013)

Saiko said:


> So... last week my dad linked me to this: http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/r...sexual-condition-can-it-be-changed-prevented/.


TL;DR, AIDS, Demons, god fearin' and some butt fuckery.


----------



## Willow (Jun 3, 2013)

Fallowfox said:


> TMV is attracted to men if they wear fetish costumes. Big whoop?
> It's not the most eloquently worded post, but of all the things he has said that offend people it is the least provocative one. x3


There are really somethings better left unsaid and your attraction to murrsuits is one of them. Especially if you've mentioned it before and people didn't want to hear about it. Mentioning it a second time doesn't make it any better. 
(This isn't even that kind of coming out thread..)


----------



## Rigby (Jun 7, 2013)

Back on the original topic tho, coming out as homosexual (not silly fetish crap), I'm gonna do that right now actually. I know what I'm going to say to my mother and everything. I'm waiting for her to finish smoking right now so I can talk to her about it. I'll report back on how it goes, I guess.


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## Leon (Jun 7, 2013)

Best of luck to you!


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## Rigby (Jun 7, 2013)

Well, it went fine. We made it thoroughly clear that wasn't going to mention it to anyone ever, which was my main concern. The only bad part was when she talked about taking me to a gay bar, ugh. I can't stand bar scenes, and the last thing I want is to be that guy who was taken to a gay bar by his fucking mom.

Besides that, it was okay.


----------



## Distorted (Jun 7, 2013)

Rigby said:


> Well, it went fine. We made it thoroughly clear that wasn't going to mention it to anyone ever, which was my main concern. The only bad part was when she talked about taking me to a gay bar, ugh. I can't stand bar scenes, and the last thing I want is to be that guy who was taken to a gay bar by his fucking mom.
> 
> Besides that, it was okay.



I would be careful about going to those kinds of places. I was stupid and went alone and wound up getting felt up, down, and all around. The people in those places are so aggressive and strange. I decided to dance with one guy and he basically attacked my face the whole time. When things started going downhill I hightailed it out of there. 

If you go, at least don't go alone. You need a stardard party of 3 or 4 to survive that kind of place.


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## Leon (Jun 7, 2013)

Or just be more aggresive, I don't care if I'm gay/straight or into purle elephants, don't touch me unless I say it's ok. Also, sounds like it went well, just tell her you'll go on your own, sounds like the safest thing.


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## Echoshock (Jun 7, 2013)

Rigby said:


> Well, it went fine. We made it thoroughly clear that wasn't going to mention it to anyone ever, which was my main concern. The only bad part was when she talked about taking me to a gay bar, ugh. I can't stand bar scenes, and the last thing I want is to be that guy who was taken to a gay bar by his fucking mom.
> 
> Besides that, it was okay.



Congrats! Wish I had the balls. Has your Mother ever been to a gay bar? Not really the sort of place you take your kids!


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## Rigby (Jun 7, 2013)

Distorted said:


> I would be careful about going to those kinds of places. I was stupid and went alone and wound up getting felt up, down, and all around. The people in those places are so aggressive and strange. I decided to dance with one guy and he basically attacked my face the whole time. When things started going downhill I hightailed it out of there.



bars are gross and they always play crappy music. i dont see myself going to one anytime soon; gay, straight, bi, it doesnt matter

well, maybe a lesbian one, but only if they play exclusively riot grrrl or female punk rock.


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## Zabrina (Jun 10, 2013)

Oh my bi.

Dicks are cool, pussys are nice, why not have both?


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## Spatel (Jun 10, 2013)

Zabrina said:


> Oh my bi.
> 
> Dicks are cool, pussys are nice, why not have both?



Wisdom.


----------



## siriuswolff (Jun 11, 2013)

I'm bi and i'm still questioning my sexuality. I don't know i'm kinda torn. I want to tell people who i really am which is a psychedelics, furry, bi guy but people honestly treat you different when they find out. I don't understand why me telling them that would change how they feel. I mean 1 minute before i told someone they were happy and joking right after i opened up i could tell they were a little freaked. I mean my really close friends do have suspicions and i kinda like it that way. They never ask but i never deny it's kinda in limbo an unspoken understanding. I'm looking forward to the day when i can wear what i am proudly and not be discriminated against.  Congrats to all of you who are out living happy i wish you the best!


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## Saiko (Jun 23, 2013)

Huh...  It's been almost two years since I realized my sexuality... It feels weird to think about what all has happened since then. I've really changed a lot...


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## TeenageAngst (Jun 23, 2013)

I don't understand how people "realize" their sexuality. You like what you like. If it doesn't turn you on, you don't like it.


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## TheMetalVelocity (Jun 23, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I don't understand how people "realize" their sexuality. You like what you like. If it doesn't turn you on, you don't like it.


 That's how they realize.


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## Kangamutt (Jun 24, 2013)

Well, I finally came out to my mom. Went far better than I ever thought it could. While she did say that she disagrees with it, she also said that she knew there's no fighting how I feel. Feels amazing to get a good load of that crap off my chest after all these years.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to puke up some of this excess stress. :/


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## Zabrina (Jul 2, 2013)

Spatel said:


> Wisdom.




Thank you, thank you.


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 2, 2013)

Kangaroo_Boy said:


> Well, I finally came out to my mom. Went far better than I ever thought it could. While she did say that she disagrees with it, she also said that she knew there's no fighting how I feel. Feels amazing to get a good load of that crap off my chest after all these years.
> 
> Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to puke up some of this excess stress. :/



Oh man that must've been rough. Throw up and feel better! That was like the hardest thing you will ever have to tell a parent. I mean, it should go something like this but what can you do:

Yerself: "Mumsy, Papa, I am gay"
Mumsy & Papa: "Oh son how happy we are you can finally admit it"

*all hug*

END SCENE


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## BRN (Jul 2, 2013)

Kangaroo_Boy said:


> Well, I finally came out to my mom. Went far better than I ever thought it could. While she did say that she disagrees with it, she also said that she knew there's no fighting how I feel. Feels amazing to get a good load of that crap off my chest after all these years.
> 
> Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to puke up some of this excess stress. :/



It's a hell of a hurdle to jump. You made it to the other side... welcome. :3


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## TeenageAngst (Jul 2, 2013)

No matter how many times I see it, admitting your sexual preferences to friends and family will never strike me as something to be celebrated. Perhaps I should inform mine that I really like anthropomorphic animal sex and see what it's like.


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## Seekrit (Jul 2, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> No matter how many times I see it, admitting your sexual preferences to friends and family will never strike me as something to be celebrated. Perhaps I should inform mine that I really like anthropomorphic animal sex and see what it's like.



There's a difference between sexual orientation and what you like to fap to. Admitting you're not STRAIGHT BY RIGHT OF GOD in a society that still has problems with being gay/bisexual/whatever is not an easy thing for some people. It's worth celebrating admitting something that may be tearing you up inside and finding your family still accepts you for it.


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## Saga (Jul 2, 2013)

Okay
So i've been reading some of these, and now I have A STORY TO TELL MY MOM.
Yur all an inspurashun hoohoo ^@^
I feel nervous but excited, IMMA DO THIS SHIT

Serious mode: on


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## TeenageAngst (Jul 2, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> There's a difference between sexual orientation and what you like to fap to. Admitting you're not STRAIGHT BY RIGHT OF GOD in a society that still has problems with being gay/bisexual/whatever is not an easy thing for some people. It's worth celebrating admitting something that may be tearing you up inside and finding your family still accepts you for it.



I still don't see why they need to know, why it must be an event when you tell them, why their opinion of the fact matters so damn much in the first place, and why you would celebrate doing what ordinary people would simply consider mentioning in passing. And for reference I did in passing mention I was a furry to my friends, and it did require some explanation. Explanation that eventually lead to everyone googling the thor dildo and a long-winded discussion about who would buy it, why, with much disgust and freakish amusement on the part of the females present. That... was a good coming out if there ever was one.


----------



## BRN (Jul 2, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> I still don't see why they need to know, why it must be an event whin en you tell them, why their opinion of the fact matters so damn much in the first place, and why you would celebrate doing what ordinary people would simply consider mentioning in passing. And for reference I did in passing mention I was a furry to my friends, and it did require some explanation. Explanation that eventually lead to everyone googling the thor dildo and a long-winded discussion about who would buy it, why, with much disgust and freakish amusement on the part of the females present. That... was a good coming out if there ever was one.



Bolt won the Olympic 100m simply by moving his legs the fastest.

Right?

The actions involved in doing something can be minimised to hell. We don't care about the fact someone succesfully let someone else know something, huzzah. It's the emotional release, contextual barriers overcame and legacy created that are worth celebrating, for the exact reason Bolt is celebrated.


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## BRN (Jul 2, 2013)

Let me put it another, less abstract way. When I came out to my mom (the story of this is in this thread, somewhere around page 70, I forget) it caused her to scream and shout, tear the house down around me, drink excessively, cry in my presence, try to convince me I was simply incorrect, and all of the stereotypical things you might conclude are similar to all of that.

Why on earth would I put myself through that? Why would I put her through that? Why does she need to know? 

Because she got over it. Hugged me three months later and told me that she realised it didn't matter.

Also, because I want to have a relationship at some point in my life. I want to be able to say, with the sort of pride that my prospective boyfriend will deserve, to my mom, "hey, this is Whatshisface. We're dating."

More sincerely, I want to be in the sort of environment where I can even hypothetically do that, even if I'm not dating anybody for the moment. Why does the hypothetical matter, do you think? Well, that's because of fear, doubt, anxiety -- and the relief of throwing those burdens off your shoulder. To resolve compartmentalisation. To be able to hold the revised expectations of the people around you in one hand, and your succesful and happy lifestyle in the other, and for there to be no conflict in doing that.

  If you think you could stoically handle the pressure of knowing that you carry that potential bombshell around inside you, a bomshell unfortunately generated just by living your life and having relationships in the way that you want to, and just weather the uncontrolled explosion of releasing it without a care for timing and consideration, and in spite of the potential of the people around you to blow up like the people around me did, I'd stop you right there and correct you. I'd tell you you were being unrealistic at best, and destructively naive at worse. The success stories in this thread of "nothing happened after all" are just as incredible; because in the same way, the fear was thrown out. That's why this is a celebrated thing, and this wasn't so much a post aimed at TeenageAngst, but more of a broadcast to remind people of why this thread is here, and why we celebrate this shit, and why it's worth going through with it.


----------



## Saga (Jul 2, 2013)

Back
I couldnt talk because I choked so I wrote it on a note. They already knew.
I had been disguising boyfriends as just friends, but they knew that too. My dad didnt say much, and there wasnt a lot of shock either (since they known for so long...). We ended up talking about how I needed to be careful who else I told, because there is ignorance in the world and all that. She said that if I doid decide to chase a military career, that I should make it known but not make a big deal of it. Also that me and any of my boyfriends are always welcome in our house.
My mom told me about how when she was young, her family took in a gay kid who was kicked out of his house when he came out, and how she had no disagreements with gay rights.
Overall it went pretty well. I wonder what other secrets of mine they know ;_;


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 2, 2013)

Saga said:


> Back
> I couldnt talk because I choked so I wrote it on a note. They already knew.
> I had been disguising boyfriends as just friends, but they knew that too. My dad didnt say much, and there wasnt a lot of shock either (since they known for so long...). We ended up talking about how I needed to be careful who else I told, because there is ignorance in the world and all that. She said that if I doid decide to chase a military career, that I should make it known but not make a big deal of it. Also that me and any of my boyfriends are always welcome in our house.
> My mom told me about how when she was young, her family took in a gay kid who was kicked out of his house when he came out, and how she had no disagreements with gay rights.
> Overall it went pretty well. I wonder what other secrets of mine they know ;_;



Yay c:


----------



## Falaffel (Jul 2, 2013)

Yay for Saga! Congrats man.

and that was beautiful SIX c':


----------



## Icky (Jul 2, 2013)

Oh, hey, this thread's still here. Congrats, people who did it :>

First week of college, I'm gonna wear this shirt. It'll get the point across.


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## Saga (Jul 2, 2013)

This thread.


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## TeenageAngst (Jul 3, 2013)

> If you think you could stoically handle the pressure of knowing that you carry that potential bombshell around inside you, a bomshell unfortunately generated just by living your life and having relationships in the way that you want to, and just weather the uncontrolled explosion of releasing it without a care for timing and consideration, and in spite of the potential of the people around you to blow up like the people around me did, I'd stop you right there and correct you. I'd tell you you were being unrealistic at best, and destructively naive at worse. The success stories in this thread of "nothing happened after all" are just as incredible; because in the same way, the fear was thrown out. That's why this is a celebrated thing, and this wasn't so much a post aimed at TeenageAngst, but more of a broadcast to remind people of why this thread is here, and why we celebrate this shit, and why it's worth going through with it.



You mean like when I became an atheist and didn't tell my extremely fundamentalist christian family about it? It was none of their business, so I didn't start nothing, and there was nothing. Although eventually (years later) I got pissed about having to deal with my family's christian sensibilities every day so I laid into them about their hocus-pocus and they reacted as you can imagine. There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth on their part, I cared less than a nihilist with a marmot, and life went on as usual. They still haven't gotten over it, and I still have yet to give a damn about their opinion. It ain't a big deal.


----------



## Kangamutt (Jul 3, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> Oh man that must've been rough. Throw up and feel better! That was like the hardest thing you will ever have to tell a parent. I mean, it should go something like this but what can you do:
> 
> Yerself: "Mumsy, Papa, I am gay"
> Mumsy & Papa: "Oh son how happy we are you can finally admit it"
> ...



The anxiety was pretty intense when she asked me. I almost instantaneously started to sweat bullets. I'm just glad that I can be at home, and not feel like I'm walking on eggshells all the time now. I swear, my anxiety dropped by half after all that.

Also, that little scene was so fucking saccharine, I'm gonna barf again. :V



SIX said:


> It's a hell of a hurdle to jump. You made it to the other side... welcome. :3



Thanks, man. While she didn't agree with it, I'm just happy it was a very civil agree to disagree situation.


----------



## CaptainCool (Jul 3, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> You mean like when I became an atheist and didn't tell my extremely fundamentalist christian family about it? It was none of their business, so I didn't start nothing, and there was nothing. Although eventually (years later) I got pissed about having to deal with my family's christian sensibilities every day so I laid into them about their hocus-pocus and they reacted as you can imagine. There was much wailing and gnashing of teeth on their part, I cared less than a nihilist with a marmot, and life went on as usual. They still haven't gotten over it, and I still have yet to give a damn about their opinion. It ain't a big deal.



You can't compare that to coming out as gay.
Fundies can start to accept a gay son or daughter sooner or later because hey, you are still their son/daughter! They loved you before you came out and sooner or later they realize that nothing has really changed and that it doesn't matter.
But "coming out" as an atheist and flat out telling them that what they believe is nonsense? Oh boy. These people are brainwashed. They can tolerate other people but if you start to criticise their beliefsystem itself they get really pissed. Because in that case you have actually given them a "proper" reason to be pissed off. You didn't make it about you and who you are, but rather about them and why they are loonies.
Sure, there are some people who are so far gone they even throw you out just for masturbating or having softcore porn on your PC but I would try to get out of a household like that anyway.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 3, 2013)

So what you're saying is I had an even higher chance of getting my ass booted than the homosexuals, and I still came out smelling like a rose through sheer force of not-give-a-shit.


----------



## BRN (Jul 3, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> So what you're saying is I had an even higher chance of getting my ass booted than the homosexuals, and I still came out smelling like a rose through sheer force of not-give-a-shit.



It's depressing, if that's what you're going to take away from the last two pages of discussion. Is this legitimately your understanding of the points made, or are you just being that funny kid in the back of a classroom?

No, CC summarised what I've said already - that coming out is a request for a truth about your future to be acknowleged and accepted. Telling your family about lacking their beliefs wasn't the same; you revealed your opinion and standing on an issue and, sure, 'came out smelling of roses'. Your issue, however - God - is external to you. When you're coming out, the issue thrusted into debate isn't external - you don't get that luxury.

ED: I'm sorry, that first paragraph was rude of me.


----------



## Icky (Jul 3, 2013)

SIX said:


> It's depressing, if that's what you're going to take away from the last two pages of discussion. *Is this legitimately your understanding of the points made, or are you just being that funny kid in the back of a classroom?*
> 
> No, CC summarised what I've said already - that coming out is a request for a truth about your future to be acknowleged and accepted. Telling your family about lacking their beliefs wasn't the same; you revealed your opinion and standing on an issue and, sure, 'came out smelling of roses'. Your issue, however - God - is external to you. When you're coming out, the issue thrusted into debate isn't external - you don't get that luxury.
> 
> ED: I'm sorry, that first paragraph was rude of me.



That's not rude, I think that's the best description of TA I've ever heard.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 3, 2013)

SIX said:


> It's depressing, if that's what you're going to take away from the last two pages of discussion. Is this legitimately your understanding of the points made, or are you just being that funny kid in the back of a classroom?


It's just a completely foreign concept that other people's opinions should dictate how I feel about my lifestyle. If I was gay I'd have no qualms in telling my parents in the same way I have no qualms telling them I'm spending time with women they've never met, or come home reeking of... you know, or going to the liquor store before noon, or anything else they don't agree with.


> No, CC summarised what I've said already - that coming out is a request for a truth about your future to be acknowleged and accepted. Telling your family about lacking their beliefs wasn't the same; you revealed your opinion and standing on an issue and, sure, 'came out smelling of roses'. Your issue, however - God - is external to you. When you're coming out, the issue thrusted into debate isn't external - you don't get that luxury.


ITP: Religious choices are just an opinion.


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## CaptainCool (Jul 3, 2013)

SIX said:


> ED: I'm sorry, that first paragraph was rude of me.



Naa.



TeenageAngst said:


> ITP: Religious choices are just an opinion.



Only that a belief is not a choice.


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## Scaly Fal (Jul 15, 2013)

Ooo I came out to my parents a few months ago. It really wasn't that big of a deal though, I told them in the morning and we had a normal day. They pretty much shrugged and said "Ok". Kinda anticlimactic to be honest, but wordse happens to people I suppose, so I'm happy (and lucky). 

Problem is there's no gay guys in tiny Alabama towns. So it doesn't even matter if people know I'm gay (but everyone does. I'm extremely blunt about it)


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## Distorted (Jul 16, 2013)

Scaly Fal said:


> Ooo I came out to my parents a few months ago. It really wasn't that big of a deal though, I told them in the morning and we had a normal day. They pretty much shrugged and said "Ok". Kinda anticlimactic to be honest, but wordse happens to people I suppose, so I'm happy (and lucky).
> 
> Problem is there's no gay guys in tiny Alabama towns. So it doesn't even matter if people know I'm gay (but everyone does. I'm extremely blunt about it)



There are plenty of gay people in Alabama, it's just that the closet is pretty damn deep here. Although if you go down 23rd street downtown, you might find an open one. (Seriously though, don't go there. Those guys are very......aggressive.)


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## Scaly Fal (Jul 16, 2013)

But...but...yeah you're right hehe. I wanna move as soon as I can (maybe UK, or even East Coast would be fine by me). I'm kinda getting sick of the small-minded Southern towns to be honest


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## Saiko (Jul 16, 2013)

Scaly Fal said:


> But...but...yeah you're right hehe. I wanna move as soon as I can (maybe UK, or even East Coast would be fine by me). I'm kinda getting sick of the small-minded Southern towns to be honest


Ikr? And if I hear my pastor make another LGBT comment, I'm going to personally tell him that i'm not attending anymore. -.-


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## TeenageAngst (Jul 16, 2013)

Haha, you go to church.


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## Ranguvar (Jul 16, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Ikr? And if I hear my pastor make another LGBT comment, I'm going to personally tell him that i'm not attending anymore. -.-


I stopped regularly attending mass when I was 18 :\


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## Saiko (Jul 16, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> I stopped regularly attending mass when I was 18 :\


As did I actually. Just here at my parents', I have to maintain an image.


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## Azure (Jul 16, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> I stopped regularly attending mass when I was 18 :\


i stopped when i never went to church in the first place

feels great man


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## Ranguvar (Jul 16, 2013)

Azure said:


> i stopped when i never went to church in the first place
> 
> feels great man



This is the last thing I did at church.


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## Azure (Jul 16, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> This is the last thing I did at church.


where does god keep the rest of it anyway? thats one epic loot chest.

its a goal in my life to punch a holy man, of any cloth.


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## Artillery Spam (Jul 17, 2013)

CaptainCool said:


> Naa.
> 
> 
> 
> *Only that a belief is not a choice.*



I still can't fathom why you believe this crap.


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## Fallowfox (Jul 17, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> I still can't fathom why you believe this crap.



Calm down, artillery spam; it's not his choice. 

Belief is the conviction that a statement is actually true; to be convinced.
What convinces people to accept something as true is variable. Evidence, argument, social pressure, convention, emotion, the confidence of the claimant and so on.
However the decision _to be_ convinced isn't one of them. 
Try convincing yourself that your second floor window leads to Narnia 'because you choose to'. 

Of course, choice literally means 'selecting possibilities' so in this regard a belief can be considered a choice: By electing to believe Relativistic is more accurate than Newtonian physics, even if you could _never_ elect to choose Newtonian physics, a selection is made. 

This however misses the point, which is that the choice is one you are unable to make freely on a whim and it's certainly not one you could overturn if it offended your parents, who follow the church of Newton... without brainwashing of course.
The selection you come to is not a choice in the same sense that picking a flavour of icecream is. It's not in your conscious control to persuade yourself that relativity is wrong and newton is correct.


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## TheMetalVelocity (Jul 17, 2013)

I am too sick in my mind to even think about church. 


Christianity just isn't for me. I realized that there are a lot more answers to life, and death for that matter than just an ancient book which separates right from wrong, like it's black and white.


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## Artillery Spam (Jul 17, 2013)

Fallowfox said:


> Calm down, artillery spam; it's not his choice.
> 
> Belief is the conviction that a statement is actually true; to be convinced.
> What convinces people to accept something as true is variable. Evidence, argument, social pressure, convention, emotion, the confidence of the claimant and so on.
> ...



For some strange reason, your posts are the only posts on this _entire_ forum that I cannot comprehend.


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## Saiko (Jul 17, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> For some strange reason, your posts are the only posts on this _entire_ forum that I cannot comprehend.


Actually I had been struggling to understand CC's point about that, but this helped a lot. Have to say I agree. xD


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## Seekrit (Jul 22, 2013)

So I came out to my parents as bisexual earlier. They still love me, and accept me, and then we drank lots of beer and listened to heavy metal c:

This is the hard part over. Everyone else in the world can go to fuck, but my mother and father deserved to know. They gave me life, and I respect them both so much. It'd be wrong not to tell them. Feel a bit guilty for thinking they would do anything other than hug me and get on with the night though.


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## Distorted (Jul 22, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> So I came out to my parents as bisexual earlier. They still love me, and accept me, and then we drank lots of beer and listened to heavy metal c:
> 
> This is the hard part over. Everyone else in the world can go to fuck, but my mother and father deserved to know. They gave me life, and I respect them both so much. It'd be wrong not to tell them. Feel a bit guilty for thinking they would do anything other than hug me and get on with the night though.



I'm really glad your folks are so accepting. You're very lucky. I'm kinda jealous actually.


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 22, 2013)

Distorted said:


> I'm really glad your folks are so accepting. You're very lucky. I'm kinda jealous actually.



Love conquers all, I guess. I'm just happy I can stop worrying about it now. Are you keeping your non-straightness to yourself?


----------



## Distorted (Jul 22, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> Love conquers all, I guess. I'm just happy I can stop worrying about it now. Are you keeping your non-straightness to yourself?



No, but it's not something that's acknowledged by the people around me. They seem to forget that I'm gay a lot or just write it off as untrue. I don't really do much to call attention to the fact though. 

If I were to meet someone I liked, I'm sure things would change. My folks freaked out on me because they thought my best friend was my boyfriend. So it's not really something I can discuss with them.


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## Seekrit (Jul 22, 2013)

Distorted said:


> No, but it's not something that's acknowledged by the people around me. They seem to forget that I'm gay a lot or just write it off as untrue. I don't really do much to call attention to the fact though.
> 
> If I were to meet someone I liked, I'm sure things would change. My folks freaked out on me because they thought my best friend was my boyfriend. So it's not really something I can discuss with them.



For what it's worth I am sorry. To me just writing someone's sexuality off is worse than hating it :/


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## Distorted (Jul 22, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> For what it's worth I am sorry. To me just writing someone's sexuality off is worse than hating it :/



It's cool. As long as I'm comfortable with myself, I'll be fine. And they're not bad people, just a little.......rigid.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 22, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> Love conquers all, I guess.




 Goddamnit, Seekrit.


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Jul 23, 2013)

So... It's official. My whole family knows I'm gay now. Strange thing is... I only told two people, my brother, and my grandmother before she passed. It like.. Spread through osmosis or something like that. Not that it wasn't obvious enough though. X3


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## Echoshock (Jul 24, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> So... It's official. My whole family knows I'm gay now.



Congrats! All positive reactions?


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Jul 24, 2013)

Echoshock said:


> Congrats! All positive reactions?



It's more like, "Oh. Whatever. As long as you're happy."
They all want to make me openly gay to like, everyone though, and I'm like, no, back off, it's my gayness, and I'll open it over time.
Still... It's not as if half of them didn't already know anyway.


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## Seekrit (Jul 25, 2013)

Oh hey I was wrong about my family! My parents are sitting down there right now discussing how messed up I am. 'I'm always make things hard for myself' 'It's just because he hasn't got a woman' 'I can't wrap my head around it'. Haha, they think I'm gay! It's exactly like that stereotype, they are completely ignoring the 9/10 times I want to fuck women. Two-faced bastards, I actually thought they were okay with it.


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## Echoshock (Jul 26, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> Oh hey I was wrong about my family! My parents are sitting down there right now discussing how messed up I am. 'I'm always make things hard for myself' 'It's just because he hasn't got a woman' 'I can't wrap my head around it'. Haha, they think I'm gay! It's exactly like that stereotype, they are completely ignoring the 9/10 times I want to fuck women. Two-faced bastards, I actually thought they were okay with it.



That sucks, perhaps they just need a bit of time to think it over. Can you direct them towards some helpful information, as they seem a little confused as well? And for goodness sake keep them well away from the Westboro Baptist Church.


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## Artillery Spam (Jul 26, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> Oh hey I was wrong about my family! My parents are sitting down there right now discussing how messed up I am. 'I'm always make things hard for myself' 'It's just because he hasn't got a woman' 'I can't wrap my head around it'. Haha, they think I'm gay! It's exactly like that stereotype, they are completely ignoring the 9/10 times I want to fuck women. Two-faced bastards, I actually thought they were okay with it.



1/10 times you want to fuck men?

GAY.

NO EXCEPTIONS. 

But seriously, that's pathetic on your parents' part.


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## Seekrit (Jul 26, 2013)

I'm trying to write flippant responses to those last two posts, but I can't. I really believed in my parents.


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## miskey (Jul 28, 2013)

I'm sorry, Seekrit. I remember coming out as bi to my parents. Well, first my dad cause I thought he would be cool with it. But he instead laughed in my face and then said 'I could never be a fag'. That was definitely a confidence booster :V
Later, i told him I was joking because he was starting to flip shit.


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## TeenageAngst (Jul 28, 2013)

This thread should be titled "Why my self esteem is more important than the feelings of everyone else in my household: The Thread"


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Jul 28, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> This thread should be titled "Why my self esteem is more important than the feelings of everyone else in my household: The Thread"



Well...
In essence, the only person that truly matters is yourself.

Wait.. Why am I even bothering to reply.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 28, 2013)

Because I struck a nerve. 99% of this topic can be summarized as:

"I'm gay but I'm scared what my parents will think."

TELL THEM OMG U CAN DO IT!

"I told my parents and they didn't accept it right away and unconditionally, I feel horrible."

OMG UR PARENTS IS ASSSHOLES HOW DARE THYE DO THAT!


----------



## miskey (Jul 28, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Because I struck a nerve. 99% of this topic can be summarized as:
> 
> "I'm gay but I'm scared what my parents will think."
> 
> ...


Even if they don't accept it right away, people should still feel good about being honest about who they are


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Jul 28, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Because I struck a nerve. 99% of this topic can be summarized as:
> 
> "I'm gay but I'm scared what my parents will think."
> 
> ...



The fuck you say. 

We've shared our own experiences with revealing our often taboo sexual orientation, advised people for and against it, and listened to you bitch about how you don't get your own damn special snowflake thread. 

Take your bitterness elsewhere, TA.


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 28, 2013)

miskey said:


> Even if they don't accept it right away, people should still feel good about being honest about who they are



The one good thing to happen to me; I do feel pretty good about myself right now. My mind's clear for once.

Got a LOT of guilt-free gayness to catch up on though.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 28, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> The fuck you say.
> 
> We've shared our own experiences with revealing our often taboo sexual orientation, advised people for and against it, and listened to you bitch about how you don't get your own damn special snowflake thread.
> 
> Take your bitterness elsewhere, TA.



If you look closely, you can actually see the exact moment where butter's own bitterness translated into irony.


----------



## Icky (Jul 28, 2013)

I can't wait for the Disney plot twist where we learn that TA's such an ass about this because he's secretly jealous of the people that have come out.

Also, sorry to hear about that stuff with your parents, Seekrit. Any recent changes?


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 28, 2013)

Icky said:


> I can't wait for the Disney plot twist where we learn that TA's such an ass about this because he's secretly jealous of the people that have come out.
> 
> Also, sorry to hear about that stuff with your parents, Seekrit. Any recent changes?



My father went away for a day, he seems a bit more relaxed now. Probably had a talk with his brother (_his_ oldest son is dead) so I'm sure he had some interesting things to say to him. There was some stilted smalltalk earlier but nothing significant.

I think I really do just have to wait, and do nothing to set them off.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Jul 28, 2013)

I always have the suspicion feeling that..
Despite accepting who I am, I feel that my parents don't exactly enjoy the fact I'm gay...
Guess I should just be happy I didn't get kicked from my house or something like that. :/


----------



## Icky (Jul 28, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> My father went away for a day, he seems a bit more relaxed now. Probably had a talk with his brother (_his_ oldest son is dead) so I'm sure he had some interesting things to say to him. There was some stilted smalltalk earlier but nothing significant.
> 
> I think I really do just have to wait, and do nothing to set them off.



Well, that's good. I think you're right, it takes time for them to see that you're just the same person. Make sure you don't waver though, some parents will assume bisexuality is a phase and that you'll "get over it".


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 28, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> I always have the suspicion feeling that..
> Despite accepting who I am, I feel that my parents don't exactly enjoy the fact I'm gay...
> Guess I should just be happy I didn't get kicked from my house or something like that. :/



This is what I'm talkin' bout right here. I'm pretty sure the only people who actually enjoy gay people being gay are gay people themselves (and Democrats up for reelection). Your sexuality is your own business, just like your religion and your finances, and if you choose not to keep it that way, you're gonna have to take the bitter with the sweet.


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 28, 2013)

Icky said:


> Well, that's good. I think you're right, it takes time for them to see that you're just the same person. Make sure you don't waver though, some parents will assume bisexuality is a phase and that you'll "get over it".



I don't think I'll be getting over my desire to touch men with my penis anytime soon. My mother is still having a hard time understanding, apparently I'm a very 'straight' individual.

Tried telling them both the only thing different from last week is that they_ know_.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Jul 28, 2013)

TA, I have a question.
Why do you even look at this topic if you have nothing constructive and/or helpful to say?
There's literally no reason for you to really be here because you aren't truly helping anyone at this point in time.
Just complaining, and making it look like your opinion is always right and superior to everyone else's opinions.

But hey, that's just me.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 29, 2013)

> Why do you even look at this topic if you have nothing constructive and/or helpful to say?



What I've said is both constructive and helpful from an objective point of view, however it's also poignant so people don't like it. I don't have any skin in this game so I don't have to worry about having a slanted viewpoint or succumbing to wishful thinking when it comes to this whole "coming out" thing. I just do what I always do. I call it as I see it.



> There's literally no reason for you to really be here because you aren't truly helping anyone at this point in time.
> Just complaining, and making it look like your opinion is always right and superior to everyone else's opinions.



Sir, I take this as a personal insult. If I was complaining I would have walls of text explaining in excruciating detail my grievances, not petty riffing. And just because my opinion is not the same as the popular consensus doesn't make it any less right or superior.


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> And just because my opinion is not the same as the popular consensus doesn't make it any less right or superior.



TA, you come out with a lot of crap but sometimes you say something I agree with and it confuses the hell outta me.

/inb4 bisexual jokes


----------



## Azure (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> This is what I'm talkin' bout right here. I'm pretty sure the only people who actually enjoy gay people being gay are gay people themselves (and Democrats up for reelection). Your sexuality is your own business, just like your religion and your finances, and if you choose not to keep it that way, you're gonna have to take the bitter with the sweet.


it became other peoples business when other people decided to discriminate and spread hate solely because of said thing. so yeah, bullshit


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 29, 2013)

> it became other peoples business when other people decided to discriminate and spread hate solely because of said thing. so yeah, bullshit



See, when you have an emotionally charged subject you don't have to make sense.

I want you to stop and seriously think about what you just said here cause it literally is the number one reason I keep the gay right's movement at an arm's distance. The mentality of, "Because other people don't like it, I need to shove it in other people's faces until they accept it." As an atheist I totally get where you're coming from with that and it's cool if you like making people put up or shut up, but you gotta realize you can't get pissed off when other people don't like it. You're the one putting it out there, you gotta deal with the fact that some folks are gonna buck back. And it's their goddamn constitutional right to do so, just like it's yours to be as openly gay as you want. If you don't like harassment, don't flaunt it. If you want to flaunt it, be prepared to deal with other people's opinions on the matter, good or bad. That's how a free and open society works.

This whole coming out thing is basically people trying to get external support from people who aren't obligated to give it, and then breaking down when they don't and thinking they're horrible people. If you put yourself out there, you gotta be willing to take the hits and not go crying because the world doesn't support you.


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> This whole coming out thing is basically people trying to get external support from people who aren't obligated to give it, and then breaking down when they don't and thinking they're horrible people. If you put yourself out there, you gotta be willing to take the hits and not go crying because the world doesn't support you.



How stupid of me to expect love from my parents.


----------



## Azure (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> See, when you have an emotionally charged subject you don't have to make sense.
> 
> I want you to stop and seriously think about what you just said here cause it literally is the number one reason I keep the gay right's movement at an arm's distance. The mentality of, "Because other people don't like it, I need to shove it in other people's faces until they accept it." As an atheist I totally get where you're coming from with that and it's cool if you like making people put up or shut up, but you gotta realize you can't get pissed off when other people don't like it. You're the one putting it out there, you gotta deal with the fact that some folks are gonna buck back. And it's their goddamn constitutional right to do so, just like it's yours to be as openly gay as you want. If you don't like harassment, don't flaunt it. If you want to flaunt it, be prepared to deal with other people's opinions on the matter, good or bad. That's how a free and open society works.
> 
> This whole coming out thing is basically people trying to get external support from people who aren't obligated to give it, and then breaking down when they don't and thinking they're horrible people. If you put yourself out there, you gotta be willing to take the hits and not go crying because the world doesn't support you.


yeah

but it isnt about you liking it

you have literally no stake in the entire gay rights movement besides the supposed face shoving that theoretically may or may not take place

your support isnt needed, nor asked for, there are plenty of people in on the issue and its doing just fine without you

that people come out it so find the very support FROM the entire "buck back" that people who also have zero stake in the gay rights movement create out of thin air or out of cultural, religious, or socially ingrained ignorance.

there is a fine line between constitutional right and hate crime as well.

in short, yeah, you might not like it, and yeah its your right to not like it or condone it, but it doesnt make you any less of an unproductive, malicious douchebag for putting people down for what amounts to reaching for meaning and acceptance within their own lives. have you ever reached out to another person for help with any problem at all? this is the same thing. and if you cant appreciate that simple fact, fuck off, they werent reaching out to you, as your participation in this thread has been to basically shit on people who came to where there would be a supposed sympathetic ear and a supportive environment of people with similar stories and experiences. since you dont qualify, what in the world are you doing here? it'd be like a nazi attending temple on rosh hashana. you just dont belong, and you arent expected or even welcome.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 29, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> How stupid of me to expect love from my parents.



They love you, they just don't unconditionally accept everything about you right away because they're human being with their own egos and sentimentalities. Also if you're old enough to make such determinations, you're old enough to stand on your own a little. If you loved them, you'd understand that and realize it's probably a huge emotional shock they gotta get over. Put your big boy pants on, Mr. Seekrit. If you think life hits hard now, wait till the gloves come off.


----------



## Seekrit (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> They love you, they just don't unconditionally accept everything about you right away because they're human being with their own egos and sentimentalities. Also if you're old enough to make such determinations, you're old enough to stand on your own a little. If you loved them, you'd understand that and realize it's probably a huge emotional shock they gotta get over. Put your big boy pants on, Mr. Seekrit. If you think life hits hard now, wait till the gloves come off.



I don't know what annoys me more; that you think I don't know this or that you think you can point it out to me like it'll do any good. Azure was right, your opinion is unwelcome and wholly unnecessary.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 29, 2013)

> you have literally no stake in the entire gay rights movement besides the supposed face shoving that theoretically may or may not take place



Oh I can assure you, it takes place.



> your support isnt needed, nor asked for, there are plenty of people in on the issue and its doing just fine without you



So you're going for the feminist angle where you can pick and choose your allies? Do you think a charity sending food to starving African children would turn down a $1 million donation from McDonald's? Last I checked gay marriage wasn't legal in the states yet, nor is anti-homosexual discrimination in the workplace illegal, so you might not want to count your constituents before they hatch. Fortunately my Libertarian sensibilities trump my indignation.



> there is a fine line between constitutional right and hate crime as well.



A hate crime is generally just a crime laced with hate, so no there's not. Personally the notion is rather petty to me.



> in short, yeah, you might not like it, and yeah its your right to not like it or condone it, but it doesnt make you any less of an unproductive, malicious douchebag for putting people down for what amounts to reaching for meaning and acceptance within their own lives. have you ever reached out to another person for help with any problem at all? this is the same thing. and if you cant appreciate that simple fact, fuck off, they werent reaching out to you, as your participation in this thread has been to basically shit on people who came to where there would be a supposed sympathetic ear and a supportive environment of people with similar stories and experiences. since you dont qualify, what in the world are you doing here? it'd be like a nazi attending temple on rosh hashana. you just dont belong, and you arent expected or even welcome.



Performing the vital role of that guy in the corner of the therapy session who's pointing out the elephant in the room. You might not like it but there's a lot to be said for straight talk, a sober attitude, and a hard nose in the face of adversity.


----------



## Azure (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> Oh I can assure you, it takes place.


prove it. demonstrate an example that isnt a pride parade or an thread on the internet and actually is detrimental to your self or person. im sure all that gay face shoving really is making your life difficult eh? or are you the one to seek it out and then cry wolf when you dont like what you see. you cant blame others for your own actions.




TeenageAngst said:


> So you're going for the feminist angle where you can pick and choose your allies? Do you think a charity sending food to starving African children would turn down a $1 million donation from McDonald's? Last I checked gay marriage wasn't legal in the states yet, nor is anti-homosexual discrimination in the workplace illegal, so you might not want to count your constituents before they hatch. Fortunately my Libertarian sensibilities trump my indignation.


last i checked, you werent donating anything but shit talking. and fortunately, i dont think that libertarian and sensibility even belong in the same sentence. this thread and your attitude toward it have nothing to do with the supposed legality of gay marriage or anti homosexual discirmination, so i dont know why youre even bringing it up because hey, you arent an ally. so dont pretend to be something you are demonstrably not.



TeenageAngst said:


> A hate crime is generally just a crime laced with hate, so no there's not. Personally the notion is rather petty to me.


the united states supreme court and the laws of all 50 states disagree with you. get fucked with your notions.




TeenageAngst said:


> Performing the vital role of that guy in the corner of the therapy session who's pointing out the elephant in the room. You might not like it but there's a lot to be said for straight talk, a sober attitude, and a hard nose in the face of adversity.


what elephant in the room? as i already stated, people are reaching for meaning in the face of, as you put it before, discrimination. which is no different from any person reaching for help and acceptance for anything ever. stiff upper lip and attitude have nothing to do with it, not everybody is an internalizing, self destructive, holier than thou indestructible asshole. theres literally nothing to like about your opinion because it contains zero substance on the subject matter beyond GET OVER IT FUCKO LIFE IS TOUGH AND SHIT. great. thanks. the obvious has been spoken, and when life gets tough, people turn to other people to heal themselves. basic fucking psychology that even your sensibilities cant escape. so take your hate filled, emotionally deadened peanut gallery and stick it where the sun dont shine, because nobody here ought to give you a second thought really.


----------



## Willow (Jul 29, 2013)

> Also if you're old enough to make such determinations, you're old enough to stand on your own a little. If you loved them, you'd understand that and realize it's probably a huge emotional shock they gotta get over. Put your big boy pants on, Mr. Seekrit. If you think life hits hard now, wait till the gloves come off.


Bullshit. Admittedly coming out to your parents is a bit of a shock and something some parents may need time to accept and understand but I don't think "shock" leads many parents to kick their kids out of the house or verbally threaten to hurt them. 

That's just hate.


----------



## TeenageAngst (Jul 29, 2013)

Willow said:


> Bullshit. Admittedly coming out to your parents is a bit of a shock and something some parents may need time to accept and understand but I don't think "shock" leads many parents to kick their kids out of the house or verbally threaten to hurt them.
> 
> That's just hate.



That is hate, however his parents did neither of those things, so obviously they don't hate him. Which makes me wonder why you brought that up in this instance.


----------



## Willow (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> That is hate, however his parents did neither of those things, so obviously they don't hate him. Which makes me wonder why you brought that up in this instance.


I meant to quote the whole post. I was speaking in general honestly. 

It's hard to accept but denying your child support is a bit of an emotional blow. And kind of hard to believe that your parents love you in any sense either.


----------



## Artillery Spam (Jul 29, 2013)

I think everyone should hold hands and turn their frowns upside down.


----------



## Distorted (Jul 29, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> I think everyone should hold hands and turn their frowns upside down.



I like that idea...though, I'm not sure it'll work.

I can tell TA is trying to help, but his rather harsh and insenstive words aren't really doing very well...


----------



## Fallowfox (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> This is what I'm talkin' bout right here. I'm pretty sure the only people who actually enjoy gay people being gay are gay people themselves (and Democrats up for reelection). Your sexuality is your own business, just like your religion and your finances, and if you choose not to keep it that way, you're gonna have to take the bitter with the sweet.



This should be read with a subtext. Your sexuality is your own business,_ unless your straight_, in which case there's no social pressure to hide your orientation.

It's a rare case that somebody who is heterosexual must hide it from their parents and masquerade as another orientation for fear of being judged as degenerate- even by their closest relatives. 

Nobody would regard this scenario as acceptable, and I think that is the context in which we must view other sexual orientations too.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Jul 29, 2013)

TeenageAngst said:


> If you look closely, you can actually see the exact moment where butter's own bitterness translated into irony.



^This people is how you defeat TA. You hit him hard and where it hurts (with a helpful dash of utter truth) and he'll just link to an ancient simpsons link that has nothing to do with the topic. 

TA, you don't change a bit. You constantly bitch and baww if you or the people you identify yourself with aren't in the spotlight. And often you make your own side look bad. You're like the KKK or WBC...no one wants to side with them on any issue. Perhaps...that's your true intention all along? 

Are you just trying to make them homohating fucktards look bad? :3c

Nah. You're just a fucking bigot. Well, here's a little true phrase for you. We're here, we're queer...get used to it. 

Put on your own big boy pants, Mr. Angsty. Things are gonna be coming up gay very soon. And there's not a damn thing you can do about it.


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## PastryOfApathy (Jul 29, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> ^This people is how you defeat TA. You hit him hard and where it hurts (with a helpful dash of utter truth) and he'll just link to an ancient simpsons link that has nothing to do with the topic.
> 
> TA, you don't change a bit. You constantly bitch and baww if you or the people you identify yourself with aren't in the spotlight. And often you make your own side look bad. You're like the KKK or WBC...no one wants to side with them on any issue. Perhaps...that's your true intention all along?
> 
> ...



I don't think I've ever seen someone get so angry over a Simpsons picture. Although I guess I shouldn't be too surprised considering who it is.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 29, 2013)

PastryOfApathy said:


> I don't think I've ever seen someone get so angry over a Simpsons picture. _Although I guess I shouldn't be too surprised considering who it is._



Who's mad? No one's even drawn a knife yet... 

_Seriously, bitch pls. Lurk moar..._


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## PastryOfApathy (Jul 29, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> Who's mad? No one's even drawn a knife yet...
> 
> _Seriously, bitch pls. Lurk moar..._



If that wasn't mad than I feel bad for whatever unlucky fuck as the displeasure of talking to you.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 29, 2013)

PastryOfApathy said:


> If that wasn't mad than I feel bad for whatever unlucky fuck as the displeasure of talking to you.



Mhm...

1/10. Nice try. If Brazen were around I'll tell you to go seek his counsel. He was the master at getting a rise outta ppl.


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## Fallowfox (Jul 29, 2013)

You realise you're arguing over the emotional response of users to a still from a cartoon? 

Play the ball, not the player.


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## PastryOfApathy (Jul 29, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> Mhm...
> 
> 1/10. Nice try. If Brazen were around I'll tell you to go seek his counsel. He was the master at getting a rise outta ppl.



Contrary to popular belief, being condescending does not make you sound smart or superior. 0/10 you didn't even try.


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## Fallowfox (Jul 29, 2013)

This has very little to do with coming out and everything to do with nothing of any interest to anyone. :\


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## Mentova (Jul 29, 2013)

Jesus christ people what the hell?

Get back on topic.


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## Seekrit (Jul 29, 2013)

Mentova said:


> Jesus christ people what the hell?
> 
> Get back on topic.



Tell us a story, Uncle Minty. How did your coming out go? :3


----------



## Mentova (Jul 29, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> Tell us a story, Uncle Minty. How did your coming out go? :3



I've only told my mom and my crazy aunt. My mom asked me if I'd ever been with a guy and I was drunk when I came out to my crazy aunt.

Honestly, since I'm only interested in dating girls I don't really feel like I need to come out anyways. Its not like if I ever have a guy bang me I'll be screaming it from the rooftops. :V


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 29, 2013)

I remember when my brother came out to our mom...

That's when she came out to him...

-_- Those were some weird years.


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## Seekrit (Jul 29, 2013)

Mentova said:


> I've only told my mom and my crazy aunt. My mom asked me if I'd ever been with a guy and I was drunk when I came out to my crazy aunt.
> 
> Honestly, since I'm only interested in dating girls I don't really feel like I need to come out anyways. *Its not like if I ever have a guy bang me I'll be screaming it from the rooftops.* :V



You might, sex can get pretty intense :v



Butterflygoddess said:


> I remember when my brother came out to our mom...
> 
> That's when she came out to him...
> 
> -_- Those were some weird years.



That... was unexpected.


----------



## Kosdu (Jul 29, 2013)

Thank you, Mentova, for getting things back on topic. Was about to report some posts.



Seekrit, I think it'll just take time to settle in. People think it's a big deal, that it really means you've changed or something, when it isn't. It's fairly normal for them to get shocked too, some parents also don't wish to believe it because the implied hardships one may go through based on orientation.

Good luck.


@Butterfly

Nice, I remember shortly after I came out my sis did too. We're all somewhat gay in that mix of genes.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 29, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> That... was unexpected.



Yes it was. Of course, we knew my dad was gay for a few months before that. 

I really didn't have to come out at all after that. (It was always pretty obvious anyway) We're a whole family of homosexuals. It's nice to be able to talk to both parents so easily about such things...even though I had to be the one to comfort my mother when she had her breakups. 

She and my Dad are still married though. In a way, they will always be the one for each other. They aren't really "people" people and they've been together too long to start over. And they do love each other...just not sexually.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 29, 2013)

Anywho, I'll continue the ever interesting tales of my parents for those of you who actually might can use it. 

My father and mother grew up in a time and a place where being gay was pretty much not the thing to be. My dad was somewhat religious at the time and felt very ashamed of his orientation. My mom was never religious but her family wasn't all that loving or caring. Not people you'd really tell your desires to. Oddly enough, her father was gay as well. So go figure. 

Mom and Dad married and such...sometimes I think it was more as an escape than true love. My mom was very determined to be loved due to her cold if not abusive upbringing and I'm sure my father was trying to "cure" his gayness by marrying his best friend. 

Alas, my father was also very ill at the time mentally so he wasn't really that sweet a guy. So along came me and my brother (twins) and my mom found something to love and call her own while my father found it difficult to really "be with her". He often cried about it in front of her. But never with us. 

Eventually in my high school years, my mom found gay porn my dad had around the house. That was kinda a tip off :V Although, she had suspected it for so long you can imagine. 

My brother came out to my mom in his early college days and then my mom revealed that she had had lesbian feelings all her life. This actually came as quite the surprise to me and my brother...and honestly, by that point in time my mother had been recovering from a nervous breakdown...so she wasn't really "all there". Truthfully, she never will be again. 

I actually suspect my mother might be bisexual and just jumped on the lesbian thing during her mid-life crisis. 

Why are they still together? 

I asked them that too. 

They did date for a while after coming out to one another...but after 5 years...no one made them happier than each other. They grew up together, raised their sons together, and suffered together. They stuck it out together. 

Can that not be called love?


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## septango (Jul 29, 2013)

wow thats one hell of a beautifull story, makes me wonder if I have any relitives that are gay? my mom IS strangely obssesed with her best freind, hmmm....


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## Distorted (Jul 30, 2013)

That was a crazy story. And more common than you think. 

It's been mentioned in my family that I had some gay cousins, but they won't tell me about them for the life of me. I don't even know their names. All my dad says is that "they were a couple of faggots that died of aids." He speaks about them so hatefully spitting while he speaks. When I came out I guess he thought I was going to end up like them. Hell he almost beat me to death himself, but wound up taking his anger out on a tree instead. 

He's since then calmed down, but I really am afraid of the man sometimes.


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (Jul 30, 2013)

Distorted said:


> That was a crazy story. And more common than you think.
> 
> It's been mentioned in my family that I had some gay cousins, but they won't tell me about them for the life of me. I don't even know their names. All my dad says is that "they were a couple of faggots that died of aids." He speaks about them so hatefully spitting while he speaks. When I came out I guess he thought I was going to end up like them. Hell he almost beat me to death himself, but wound up taking his anger out on a tree instead.
> 
> He's since then calmed down, but I really am afraid of the man sometimes.


 Even though my family is very conservative themselves especially with traditional values, they wouldn't say something like that, especially when referring to that disease, and of family members.


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## Distorted (Jul 30, 2013)

TheMetalVelocity said:


> Even though my family is very  conservative themselves especially with traditional values, they  wouldn't say something like that, especially when referring to that  disease, and of family members.




I don't really get why he reacts as harshly as he does. I think something may have happened back in his day, but I dare not ask. To even see my dad get so mad at something was baffling to me. He was always a bit grumpy but he never got as bad as when I came out. Things have settled down now, and they don't really ask me if I "still feel the same way" anymore. I kinda hope it stays that way.


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## TheMetalVelocity (Jul 30, 2013)

Distorted said:


> I don't really get why he reacts as harshly as he does. I think something may have happened back in his day, but I dare not ask. To even see my dad get so mad at something was baffling to me. He was always a bit grumpy but he never got as bad as when I came out. Things have settled down now, and they don't really ask me if I "still feel the same way" anymore. I kinda hope it stays that way.


 When people are angry, they say fucked up things.


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## Distorted (Jul 30, 2013)

TheMetalVelocity said:


> When people are angry, they say fucked up things.



So very true.


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## Seekrit (Jul 30, 2013)

Distorted said:


> That was a crazy story. And more common than you think.
> 
> It's been mentioned in my family that I had some gay cousins, but they won't tell me about them for the life of me. I don't even know their names. All my dad says is that "they were a couple of faggots that died of aids." He speaks about them so hatefully spitting while he speaks. When I came out I guess he thought I was going to end up like them. Hell he almost beat me to death himself, but wound up taking his anger out on a tree instead.
> 
> He's since then calmed down, but I really am afraid of the man sometimes.



I'm really sorry to hear that. To think I'm complaining about my situation :c


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## Distorted (Jul 30, 2013)

Seekrit said:


> I'm really sorry to hear that. To think I'm complaining about my situation :c



No, it's fine. 

I mean, at least I still have a home. Some people are kicked on the street when they come out. I'm just glad they care enough to still help me out. When I first told them there was an initial reaction of hysteria, and then we just had arguments on and off for about a year. In the process of it all I grew a backbone and came to the realization that my folks aren't all very understanding people who are different. I mean for Christ's sake, my mother thinks that people with blue eyes are evil. 

It wasn't very pleasant, but it helped me stand up for myself in a way. I would lie to myself and try to do things their way at first, but I wind up depressed and angry all the time. When I accepted it, and started fighting back things began to work out for me. People even started respecting me more. So I guess the process of coming out is in a way a person coming into themselves. 

Also Don't feel bad, Seekrit. No one wants to hear their family shun them over being who they are. That's hard for anyone.


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## Fallowfox (Jul 30, 2013)

People with blue eyes are evil? Wah? I thought my granny thinking seahorses were mythical creatures was weird.


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## fonduemaster (Jul 30, 2013)

I'm not sure about coming out. I'm not exactly open to this anywhere... I'm pretty sure I'm gay, but I'm not entirely sure because I like girls's faces but none of their boobs etc, and I'm not really interested in guys until it gets preeetty hot :V. I may just be going through a phase, i don't know :/
Put that aside, how hard is it to come out? I mean like the feeling before and after the process, the pros and cons etc. I don't know if I want to or not. Pretty much everyone I know IRL is suspecting me of it because apparently I'm girly, but I don't realize it at all unless if I'm doing it on purpose. Is there any point to it though? Your life is your life and it's not essential in life if people know who you really are and all, right?


Distorted said:


> That was a crazy story. And more common than you think.
> 
> It's been mentioned in my family that I had some gay cousins, but they won't tell me about them for the life of me. I don't even know their names. All my dad says is that "they were a couple of faggots that died of aids." He speaks about them so hatefully spitting while he speaks. When I came out I guess he thought I was going to end up like them. Hell he almost beat me to death himself, but wound up taking his anger out on a tree instead.
> 
> He's since then calmed down, but I really am afraid of the man sometimes.


Awww, crap that sounds terrible. I'm glad he's not like that to you anymore.


Distorted said:


> I mean for Christ's sake, my mother thinks that people with blue eyes are evil.


 Blue eyes are pretty though :c I'm stuck with crappy brown eyes ;_;


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## Kryn (Aug 2, 2013)

Well I finally came out to my mom yesterday. I had been dating this guy for about a month and a half and things have just felt right. I got off work early and on the drive home something just got stuck in my head and I decided I wanted to tell her when I got home. I paced around the kitchen for atleast 10 minutes before I finally got the nerve to walk into the living room and I just told her. Her response was a smile and an "ok, thats fine" lol. Seriously the most anti-climatic response I ever thought could happen. She told my dad for me and she claims he's ok with it but I haven't seen him in person yet.
My only regret is waiting this long (I just turned 25). I always feared the worst but something always told me it would be ok, and I feel a million times better right now


----------



## Ryuu (Aug 22, 2013)

Update on me.... 


So my parents have come around, and are so nice to him. My friends have adjusted and even though i may have lost one or two, i found out who my real friends were. I have found a few true friends that i will love forever. And.... In the process i found Austin. Remarkably only lived 2 miles from were i used to live in KC and never spotted him till i met him over Craigslist. 0.0  We have been together almost 4 months now and have our own place. Things are great! 


So if you are in the depths and need help, my advice is keep your head up. things turn around soooo fast.


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Aug 22, 2013)

So it seems family, friends, everyone basically knows I'm pretty damn gay.
...No one really cares.
My family DOES know I'm dating a guy. A black, Canadian guy *cough Slayer cough*
They looked at me odd, then went about their business.


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## Migoto Da (Aug 24, 2013)

Well, my mother is a stereotypical homophobic bible-toting soccer mom who pretty much wants nothing to do with gays and stuff like that.

Needless to say, when I came out to my mother, she freaked out. She wanted to get me into one of those Christian 'rehabilitation centers' where they try to 'convert' you from being gay to straight, forced me to go to church, and said she was going to boot me out as soon as I turned 18. Things have calmed down since then, but safe to say I never eat at the table.

My sister doesn't really care, but since then she's always been the favourite of my mother anyway.

Not many people know that I'm gay except on the internet, but I have had my fair share of homophobic run-ins.


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## Saga (Aug 24, 2013)

Migoto Da said:


> Well, my mother is a stereotypical homophobic bible-toting soccer mom who pretty much wants nothing to do with gays and stuff like that.
> 
> Needless to say, when I came out to my mother, she freaked out.


Did she started quoting bible verses?


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## Distorted (Aug 24, 2013)

Saga said:


> Did she started quoting bible verses?



They usually do that. If that doesn't work, they start trying to use faulty logic. It's really bad when they try logic because they haven't used it in a while...


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## Ryuu (Aug 24, 2013)

Distorted said:


> They usually do that. If that doesn't work, they start trying to use faulty logic. It's really bad when they try logic because they haven't used it in a while...



+1 and LOL


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## Falaffel (Aug 24, 2013)

Distorted said:


> They usually do that. If that doesn't work, they start trying to use faulty logic. It's really bad when they try logic because they haven't used it in a while...


Really?
I thought parents went straight to exorcism.


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## asdfKBSmASH (Aug 30, 2013)

It'd be too much to exit the closet 

I couldn't even imagine not investing in so much effort to hide the fact, and simply being free and clear. I've never really been in a relationship, because I got this stupid complex where I hide personal things that weigh on me so I don't have to deal with them. Being gay is the grandfather of it all, and even if everyone was okay with it, I know it'd still mess me up for some stupid reason or another. It'd be pretty cool to actually be in love though, I bet


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Aug 30, 2013)

Well fuck...
I feel like my older brother wants to flip-flop from being the religious accepting guy, to homophobic asshole.
One minute, he's all nice, and accepting, the next he's calling me a man whore that he hopes dies from AIDS.

The rest of my family just seems to begrudgingly accept it, so that's good I guess.


----------



## Falaffel (Aug 30, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> Well fuck...
> I feel like my older brother wants to flip-flop from being the religious accepting guy, to homophobic asshole.
> One minute, he's all nice, and accepting, the next he's calling me a man whore that he hopes dies from AIDS.
> 
> The rest of my family just seems to begrudgingly accept it, so that's good I guess.



To be fair your sig and avatar don't help your case :v

Ignore him though, he'll get over it.


----------



## Saiko (Sep 1, 2013)

Hrm... I should probably come out to my little brother sometime soon. He's the same age I was when I figured out I was gay, but he's still in the "it's a sin" mindset.

Should prove interesting lol


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## Saiko (Sep 8, 2013)

Considering it's been a week, I think I'm allowed grace on double-posting.

Anyway...
My parents are so far in denial of my sexuality that they even make anti-gay cracks in the car with me. I've come out to them twice and even accidentally sent a lovey text to my dad instead of my bf. Seriously? Wtf... :/


----------



## Fallowfox (Sep 9, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Considering it's been a week, I think I'm allowed grace on double-posting.
> 
> Anyway...
> My parents are so far in denial of my sexuality that they even make anti-gay cracks in the car with me. I've come out to them twice and even accidentally sent a lovey text to my dad instead of my bf. Seriously? Wtf... :/



Cognitive dissonance? 

Maybe you don't match the gay stereotype that is the butt of their jokes, so they can't believe it's possible you're gay.


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## Ranguvar (Sep 10, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Considering it's been a week, I think I'm allowed grace on double-posting.
> 
> Anyway...
> My parents are so far in denial of my sexuality that they even make anti-gay cracks in the car with me. I've come out to them twice and even accidentally sent a lovey text to my dad instead of my bf. Seriously? Wtf... :/


Your gayness isn't exactly an Agatha Christie  novel in the making, one Hawt  make out session with your bf in front of your parents should solve this mystery.


----------



## Saiko (Sep 18, 2013)

Weeeee! I just came out to my brother. He doesn't "agree" with it but gives no fucks. ^_^

He giggled a bit when i told him about my bf. XD


----------



## Ranguvar (Sep 23, 2013)

I finally came out to my family yesterday. They were  all genuinely surprised, but supportive nonetheless. It actually went a lot better than I imagined and  I wish I would had said something earlier :/


----------



## Distorted (Sep 23, 2013)

Green_Knight said:


> I finally came out to my family yesterday. They were  all genuinely surprised, but supportive nonetheless. It actually went a lot better than I imagined and  I wish I would had said something earlier :/



Congratulations. It's good to know your folks took it well. How do you feel now that's its been said?


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## Red Savarin (Sep 23, 2013)

I never want to come out to my family (aside from my sisters, maybe). My brother's a fucking shithead that wouldn't take it seriously, but that's not the problem. It's my fucking parents.

I love how after reading that, some of you are going to make the connection that I live in the south and have Catholic parents, so they must clearly hate gays and shove religion down my throat and drink and beat me and have this idea that they're the best parents in the world while I suffer just like, what, 60% of Americans (I dunno, maybe a little higher)?

No, it's quite the opposite. My parents wouldn't mind if I was gay. That's not a problem but, well, they always kind of forced it, and it was embarrassing as shit growing up.

See, I have an uncle who is gay, and it completely ruined the relationship between him and my grandfather. I guess that must have turned a few screws loose in mom or something because ever since I was a kid (like, 4), the both of them have been encouraging me to be gay. Sadly, it worked. When I was younger and did that whole gender segregation thing in school with the rest of my friends the way every American kid inevitably does, they told me it was okay and that I could just get married to my friend. When I was older and my sisters would leave their toys in my room, my parents would ask me if I liked girls toys and straight up asked me if I was gay (I was 7). When I was in high school, my parents didn't want to know if I had a girlfriend, they wanted to know if me or my brother had a boyfriend. Meanwhile, one of my uncles, a homophobic kiss ass rich boy who likes taking family members for a ride, would always try to reinforce that it was very important that I have a girlfriend by age 5. Now you guys can see why I don't date (or didn't date much in my youth). I know their hearts are in the right place and just don't want to see me hate them because of something as trivial as that, but they're not doing a very good job of sending that message.

As for my brother, he gets a kick out of insulting gay people. He has like, seven gay friends, but he still likes to call people faggots and make gay sex jokes and all that.

I don't want to give those three the satisfaction of knowing I suck dick.


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Sep 23, 2013)

Red Savarin said:


> As for my brother, he gets a kick out of insulting gay people. He has like, seven gay friends, but he still likes to call people faggots and make gay sex jokes and all that.



This is my brother. Dx


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## Distorted (Sep 23, 2013)

Red Savarin said:


> I never want to come out to my family (aside from my sisters, maybe). My brother's a fucking shithead that wouldn't take it seriously, but that's not the problem. It's my fucking parents.
> 
> I love how after reading that, some of you are going to make the connection that I live in the south and have Catholic parents, so they must clearly hate gays and shove religion down my throat and drink and beat me and have this idea that they're the best parents in the world while I suffer just like, what, 60% of Americans (I dunno, maybe a little higher)?
> 
> ...



Are....you sure you live in Texas? Or are you from some other dimension where things are opposite of what they are here?

Also brothers are just like that I think. My brother says everything's gay all the time. Kinda freaks out if I touch him too.


----------



## Artillery Spam (Sep 23, 2013)

Red Savarin said:


> I never want to come out to my family (aside from my sisters, maybe). My brother's a fucking shithead that wouldn't take it seriously, but that's not the problem. It's my fucking parents.
> 
> I love how after reading that, some of you are going to make the connection that I live in the south and have Catholic parents, so they must clearly hate gays and shove religion down my throat and drink and beat me and have this idea that they're the best parents in the world while I suffer just like, what, 60% of Americans (I dunno, maybe a little higher)?
> 
> ...



This is probably the oddest post in this entire thread. 

I wouldn't even know how to react in this situation.


----------



## Jabberwocky (Sep 23, 2013)

I have come out to my friends as pansexual and they supported me all the way.
I can never tell my family. The only person from my family that knows is my grandmother, and she lives down in Mexico. She accepted me for whom I was and didn't change her view on me.
My mother...is a hardcore Christian. I won't share what sect seeing it's embarrassing, but she has this hatred for homosexuality she even said it was a plague. I once dropped the bomb and IMPLIED I was bisexual (at the time I didn't know I was pan) and it was the worst thing I could have ever done. Lucky for me I fell for a guy that next school year, so it was a huge help in masking the fact that I like females too. 
My mother is so hateful and here is a prime example, we went to the movies for her birthday and she chose the movie because it was a Mexican film. Late into the movie she was shocked by a lesbian couple coming into the plot, and she made horrid comments like "disgusting. pigs. filthy" and I had to be very harsh and told her off and it worked like a charm. Didn't bring it up again. It was a little victory for me.

But if I ever do come out fully, I will be kicked out and brushed off without looking back. and, to me, it's all because of how much her precious religion has brainwashed her. She prefers her religion over how her own daughter feels.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Sep 23, 2013)

Red Savarin said:


> I don't want to give those three the satisfaction of knowing I suck dick.



Been there, done that. 

My mom is a big "told ya so" person...but not in a really cruel way.


----------



## Sweetheartz22 (Sep 23, 2013)

I see this sticky everyday which causes me to think about this song EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.

Im coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
Im coming out
I want the world to know
I got to let it show

There's a new me coming out
And I just had to live
And I wanna give
Im completely positive
I think this time around
I am gonna do it
Like you never do it
Like you never knew it
Ooh, I'll make it through

The time has come for me
To break out of the shell
I have to shout
That Im coming out

Im coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
Im coming out
I want the world to know
I got to let it show

Im coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
Im coming out
I want the world to know
I got to let it show

Ive got to show the world
All that I wanna be
And all my billities
There's so much more to me
Somehow, I have to make them
Just understand
I got it well in hand
And, oh, how Ive planned
Im spreadin love
There's no need to fear
And I just feel so glad
Everytime I hear:

Im coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
Im coming out
I want the world to know
I got to let it show

​


----------



## Ryuu (Sep 25, 2013)

got a new job.... ugh they dont know


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## Saiko (Sep 25, 2013)

Ryuu said:


> got a new job.... ugh they dont know


Generally speaking, it's none of their business... I'd try not to worry too much about it. :s


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## barkinupyourtree14 (Oct 1, 2013)

Well, I'm almost all the way out as bisexual. I have told friends and my little bro. All though the gay jokes are poorly written, they haven't been that bad. I don't want my grandma to know, she will probably drop dead. I could care less about my dad, he will be lucky to get out of jail by the time I'm 30. My mom, I don't know about yet I'm still decideing.


----------



## Metrix (Oct 3, 2013)

I used to be homeless


----------



## TheMetalVelocity (Oct 3, 2013)

Metrix said:


> I used to be homeless


 wrong thread?


----------



## Ryuu (Oct 15, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Generally speaking, it's none of their business... I'd try not to worry too much about it. :s



True. LOL  I mean i could care less if they did or didn't .


----------



## Dodo (Oct 15, 2013)

My mother found my bird/rabbit costume I was working on and wondered if I was a furry and fucked the dog. No, seriously. It was a little sad.

I had to explain to her that just because I make costumes doesn't mean I partake in bestiality.

It was a strange day.

She's always been iffy about my costumes but when they passed from just wacky clothes to animals THAT WAS JUST TOO MUCHHHH AAAUGH NO

Although quite frankly I was planning on making a bird costume for a while, as early as 2011 I was in the works for trying to make Murkrow, but I wasn't skilled enough to do it. I'm actually really surprised.


----------



## kairi920 (Nov 2, 2013)

I came out to some of my friends as being transgender/bisexual a few months ago, things went well enough, nobody tried to kill me at least, or brought religion into the equation. Then I told my mother, again, things went well, she didn't understand it, but didn't disagree with it either. So I went on and told like, all of my other friends, still went well... Then my mom told my dad a few months later, and well, you can guess how that one went... Pretty well actually, guess I got lucky. I just find it surprising how so many people can hate someone because of something so trivial, so many people just aren't accepted for who they are, and it makes me wonder, what makes my scenario different from some of the other stories I've heard.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Nov 3, 2013)

So..
A friend of mine came out to me yesterday as a bi-leaning lesbian.
I have a gay pal now.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Nov 3, 2013)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> So..
> A friend of mine came out to me yesterday as a bi-leaning lesbian.
> I have a gay pal now.



:3 I miss my lesbian best friend in high school. She sorta made me the nutty, free spirited thing I am today. 

Also, earlier today I sorta revealed to a very trust worthy coworker of mine that both me and my brother were gay. She asked about his ex...and it just ending up with me revealing "We aren't like other guys...(heavy implication)". 

She was a sweetheart about it too. I asked her to keep it on the down low from our big boss, Rhonda, since that woman is a hypocritical religious cunt who might fire me for being that way. (They can let you go for whatever where I work) She was all "Well, it none of her damn business." 

<3 That girl rocks.


----------



## Carnau (Nov 5, 2013)

I came out to two big groups of people in my life, both had polar opposite reactions.







I first came out to my ex about being transgendered and he was okay with it for quite a long time. His nosy sister read my secretive journal one day and came upon an entree that mentioned my gender identity -needless to say, word spread pretty fast and people stopped talking to me seemingly overnight. Although my ex wasn't Mormon, his family happened to be and then they eventually shamed him into of splitting up with me. They then proceeded to chase me out of their house. 
I won't go into detail but yes there was a lot of harassment and threats I encountered in that dark time in my life.


Years after the shock was able to wear off, I finally came out to my family one member at a time. They where far more accepting than I ever would have hoped they would be and I feel like I have a safe place now. They didn't panic, I think they saw it coming. :lol: I always loved them but I feel like I can respect them so much more now.


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## Artillery Spam (Nov 5, 2013)

Metrix said:


> I used to be homeless



Ah lelele


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Nov 5, 2013)

Artillery Spam said:


> Ah lelele



 Maaaaaaaaakkkkeeee Waaaaaaaayyyy~~~~


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## Carnau (Nov 5, 2013)

Kumba ya mah lawed?


----------



## Dover (Nov 9, 2013)

I came out as bi to my 3 closest friends. Well, not closest anymore. They dunno how to keep their yaps shut -w-. Anyway, I felt like I was gonna throw up after I told them. They were surprised that I'd admitted it not the fact that I was bi lol. I tend to set off peoples "gaydar" as well as I have a strong one too. Idk why. I've asked people who said they think I am gay. They said they don't know, or that I hang out with more chicks than I do guys or that its simply because how goofy I act when I'm with my best friends that a normal guy wouldn't be as hyper as me. Generally I dress classy, I have a husky/muscular build with a beard and I learned how to be under the gaydar reading too hehe. I actually enjoy the closet life, nobody NEEDS to know unless you want them too.


----------



## Fallowfox (Nov 9, 2013)

Since starting university I've been open, because grinding guys in nightclubs isn't going to be something you can hide from other students. It hasn't affected my life in any measure as far as I can tell; nobody bats an eyelid about it. The college representative for LGBT told me ominously that a couple of years ago this college 'wasn't a good place to be gay' but the atmosphere is so relaxed now that I can't believe people here were _ever _inflammatory about the subject. 

I haven't told my parents, but I don't expect them to have any problem if I do.


----------



## mahoumaru (Nov 10, 2013)

Well, three years ago, I didn't come out to my parents more like my little brother told on me and they brought it up in a fight. Ouch. It took them almost a year to accept that I wasn't changing at all and only a few days ago did my mom even have the guts to come out make a joke about it. My dad was better in that he just told me "okay well if that's what you really want, okay..." about half a year ago. Sadly my mom still tells me I'm going to hell but I've gotten past it. Her problem man, not mine. ãƒ½ï¼ˆÂ´ãƒ¼ï½€ï¼‰â”Œ
Also literally all of my friends laughed at me and told me I was an open book and patted me on the back and we're all still great buds.


----------



## CaptainCool (Nov 10, 2013)

mahoumaru said:


> Sadly my mom still tells me I'm going to hell but I've gotten past it. Her problem man, not mine. ãƒ½ï¼ˆÂ´ãƒ¼ï½€ï¼‰â”Œ



Next time she brings that up tell her that, according to her loony fairytale book, SHE is the one going to hell because she is judging others which according to her magical sky wizzard is a big no-no.
Then punt her in the ovaries for being a ridiculous loony and a massive twat towards her own child.


----------



## Saiko (Nov 10, 2013)

Well after two years, I've finally drilled it into my parents' heads that I'm gay and not changing any time soon.

Short version of how I accomplished this? Back in September, I had to get my colon removed; and I wanted my boyfriend there. So I drove myself from Mississippi to Michigan under an alibi of being at my apartment, and he showed up at the waiting room.

They were *pissed*, but it got the point across. It also showed my dad to be more than a little emotionally abusive and manipulative, as witnessed by my bf; so fuck him.


----------



## Yago (Nov 10, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Well after two years, I've finally drilled it into my parents' heads that I'm gay and not changing any time soon.
> 
> Short version of how I accomplished this? Back in September, I had to get my colon removed; and I wanted my boyfriend there. So I drove myself from Mississippi to Michigan under an alibi of being at my apartment, and he showed up at the waiting room.
> 
> They were *pissed*, but it got the point across. It also showed my dad to be more than a little emotionally abusive and manipulative, as witnessed by my bf; *so fuck him*.




True story.

but, uh, yeah he ain't hot enough.


----------



## Wydo (Nov 10, 2013)

Hey my twin sister came out the closet about a month ago to my dad and he was sound with it and he even made a gay joke the same day saying we need to get you a manly job now lol. Though she did get a bit of shit about it with a few gay jokes, nobody is that bothered any more and now I am thinking of getting her a pride flag for Christmas for my local towns pride festival. So I think nobody is that bothered that anyone is gay (were I live anyway)and most of the time the only reason you get shit about it is because either its the only thing going on or its the only thing somebody can say against you!


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## Butters Shikkon (Nov 10, 2013)

Saiko said:


> Back in September, I had to get my colon removed



The entire thing? D:

Omg. I'm sorry to hear that.


----------



## Explolguy (Nov 10, 2013)

Started coming out around 16. First to a few friends, who were cool with it, then when I turned 17 I came out to my parents. Parents were pretty cool with it too. I had trouble continuing from there, and actually asked my parents to tell the rest of the family about it. As far as I know, nobody really gives a shit. I posted on facebook about it too, and got a little flak from a couple people who were shit friends anyway. We're not friends anymore. I also forgot that I have some co-workers added as friends on facebook so everyone at work knows. If anyone cares I don't know about it.

Basically, anyone important in my life doesn't care. That's all that really matters to me.


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## Saga (Nov 10, 2013)

Saiko said:


> *I had to get my colon removed;* and I wanted my *boyfriend* there.


Rough life

I hope you werent a bottom


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## Saiko (Nov 10, 2013)

Saga said:


> Rough life
> 
> I hope you werent a bottom


Blegh, I liked both enough to manage; but it was definitely my preference... s'not the thread topic though. .////.

Primary point was that I went all-in and won, to the dismay of my parents.



Yago said:


> but, uh, yeah he ain't hot enough.


Shoosh! You know what I meant! -///-;


----------



## asdfKBSmASH (Nov 12, 2013)

Here's a dimwitted position...

I should have accepted the fact that I am what I am years ago, but I couldn't...

Finally, a friend of mine who I had previously _assumed _was in a similar position, had portrayed their own potential sexuality, where we both took off in such an aspect. It was all for one night, no more than describing ourselves as being in the same boat, and describing what could be a relationship. I wouldn't call it loving, but we were definitely accustomed to each other...

Then, we woke up the next day, and everything was weird as fuck. I've never been there in my life, and looking back over that simple experience has done nothing but burnt me. Feelings like that in reality are something I've never dealt with. I guess that would accommodate never having an actual relationship... You people that have actually developed feelings over real love must have had something else to deal with! 

It's too fucking scary for me. 

I know as much as to say as, we're meant to be advocates of either's place in life, but not lovers.

Maybe how messed up that night was will bring us together enough to be there when shit goes south, if shit every gets the opportunity to go south.

I'm afraid to talk to him, I'm sure he's afraid to talk to me. That was the only time I've ever been there  Less than a week ago 

Being gay isn't easy, though nobody said it would be.


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## Saiko (Nov 12, 2013)

asdfKBSmASH said:


> Here's a dimwitted position...
> 
> I should have accepted the fact that I am what I am years ago, but I couldn't...
> 
> ...


I don't know how far you two went... you seem to hint vaguely at "stuff" happening, but I may be reading into it. But in any case, you both should take solace in the fact that you both are new to it all; and neither of you should be embarrassed. Whatever happened, try to laugh it off as trying to learn together. There's nothing to be ashamed of, especially when you both were very new to it. x3

As for potentially being in a relationship, the primary rule is to not rush things. Seeing as it'd be your first, you really don't have a clue how it's going to work out; and you have no standard for quality control. If you set your expectations for it too high too soon, you could easily get hurt. Basically, go ahead; but both of you tread lightly.

Oh, and yes you two need to have another talk. 
Maybe sit down together and hold hands or something. I remember being extremely shy about touching another guy that way at the start of college last year, and a friend easing me into it helped me tremendously.


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## Xevvy (Nov 14, 2013)

Wow, big thread. Might as well weigh in.

It took me quite a long time to come to terms with my sexuality - I think I was about 19 when I finally got to the point where I could say I was comfortable with the whole thing. The interesting thing was though that nobody had picked it - everyone has just sorta assumed I was straight, given that I acted straight, was into normal straight guy stuff, etc, so I decided it'd just be easier to keep it that way. My friends were all fairly critical of homosexuality, my closest friend very much so, and despite his closed minded views, he was a good friend. As for my family? Well, it comes back to the whole 'being easier' thing, nobody would guess it otherwise. So in the end, I decided to keep it entirely to myself and only really be open about it around other gay people, of which I knew precisely zero, bar online of course - so I kept it close to my chest for a while there, even if I had come out to myself so to speak.

Anyway, the whole 'tell nobody' thing was going well until my mother stumbled across something... well, something that made it pretty damned obvious. I won't go into details on this, but that sorta forced me out of the closet, so to speak. She reacted pretty well, was pretty shocked at first (She kept telling me she had no idea and that I totally wasn't obvious, well duh) but everything has returned to normal since then - nothing has changed at all between us. Occasionally it still comes up in conversations, and that can sometimes be ever so slightly awkward, but other than that everything is fine. 

That's the jist of the situation to date. So I suppose you can still say I'm half in the closet, but I think it's more a case of it being nobody's damn business. I'll be moving cities next year, a late start to University in a new city, and I've toyed with the idea of going in completely open about my sexuality, but that really is easier than done. I'm really the kind of person to keep those things to myself, so any kind of outright faggotry to make a point will be an outright betrayal of myself as a person. Maybe if I can surround myself with the right people I can just sort of gently make it known like it ain't no thang. 

Anyway, that's all folks. Sorry about the hueg wall of text, I have a habit of writing a novel when only a sentence is needed, it's just the way I am.


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## Dover (Nov 15, 2013)

I don't think there's a point to shout out to the world about what you like to do. So I agree with you Xevvy. Its not anyone's business.


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## CaptainCool (Nov 15, 2013)

Xevvy said:


> Wow, big thread. Might as well weigh in.
> 
> It took me quite a long time to come to terms with my sexuality - I think I was about 19 when I finally got to the point where I could say I was comfortable with the whole thing. The interesting thing was though that nobody had picked it - everyone has just sorta assumed I was straight, given that I acted straight, was into normal straight guy stuff, etc, so I decided it'd just be easier to keep it that way. My friends were all fairly critical of homosexuality, my closest friend very much so, and despite his closed minded views, he was a good friend. As for my family? Well, it comes back to the whole 'being easier' thing, nobody would guess it otherwise. So in the end, I decided to keep it entirely to myself and only really be open about it around other gay people, of which I knew precisely zero, bar online of course - so I kept it close to my chest for a while there, even if I had come out to myself so to speak.
> 
> ...



I think you handled it really well. You didn't make a huge deal out of it and you just acted like yourself. I think when you do it like that that also makes it easier for others to understand. It makes them think! Sure, you are gay. But you didn't act like a massive walking stereotype around them and you didn't change after they found out about it. It makes people realize they hey, gay people are totally normal afterall! XD


----------



## Icky (Nov 15, 2013)

I'm sloooooowly working on being open with my roommates by working in small things about my boyfriend into casual conversation. Only managed to do it once, but he seemed to take it well :3


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Nov 15, 2013)

It's awkward knowing that some of your teachers knowing your gay. >.>
My English and Physics teachers know, and, I'm guessing they're cool with it. I didn't even say it, my friends and I were just talking about it, and they just overheard.


----------



## Magick (Nov 15, 2013)

I don't exactly make it a point to tell people I'm gay unless they ask, and I still find it funny when people are surprised when they find out I am. Especially with the people at work, like the time I heard a co-worker arguing with my friend because he didn't believe it.


----------



## fonduemaster (Nov 15, 2013)

A while ago i told my close gal friends and they didn't care, I'm assuming one feels a bit uncomfortable about it around me but doesn't want to say her opinion and another was all like OMGFGZ I LURVE GAY PPL <3<3<3 and my closest one was all like 'I guessed lol'. I feel a little bit bad though because i relied on her to tell the rest. As for telling my male friends and family, nope nope nope never. Did I mention that the previous two were bisexual? I don't want to make them uncomfortable at all. I've also asked them not to tell anyone else and that I'm not entirely sure. I know I should've waited until I was sure but everyday I was asked if I was gay at least like 3 times every day, and when you get asked those kind of questions and you're closeted, you get really uncomfortable and find it hard to lie. I mainly came out just to stop these questions. So all went well and that's how it is~

e: off-topic but wow i havent made a post here in like forever :V


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## Milo (Nov 15, 2013)

I unwillingly came out to a few coworkers when I said out loud "that guy is adorable"

I thought I said that in my head.


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## asdfKBSmASH (Nov 16, 2013)

Xevvy said:


> Wow, big thread. Might as well weigh in.
> 
> It took me quite a long time to come to terms with my sexuality - I think I was about 19 when I finally got to the point where I could say I was comfortable with the whole thing. The interesting thing was though that nobody had picked it - everyone has just sorta assumed I was straight, given that I acted straight, was into normal straight guy stuff, etc, so I decided it'd just be easier to keep it that way. My friends were all fairly critical of homosexuality, my closest friend very much so, and despite his closed minded views, he was a good friend. As for my family? Well, it comes back to the whole 'being easier' thing, nobody would guess it otherwise. So in the end, I decided to keep it entirely to myself and only really be open about it around other gay people, of which I knew precisely zero, bar online of course - so I kept it close to my chest for a while there, even if I had come out to myself so to speak.
> 
> ...



I know that feeling 100% It's a stupid analogy, but it's like fishing (I heard this from the only other person that knows me in the aspect, but it's kind of true)...

'The guy beside you casted with a shiny piece of tackle, he caught suckers and fish he didn't want to deal with until he learned to jig; before, some of them stole his bait, others ripped his lures right off their leaders... You're casting with nothing but line, and time after time nothing turns up... There's a point where you gotta just say fuck it and tie something on...'

I'm no better than you, I'm still just being the not-gay-no-girlfriend-yet guy (if you're that), but that sunk home with me, maybe it could help


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## Saiko (Nov 18, 2013)

Yaaaaaay, I'm able to tell my parents I'm talking to my bf without them giving me shit. c:

Tangible improvement! \o/


----------



## BRN (Nov 18, 2013)

Light update; looks like my dad found out my plans to head to Canada and, being the smart guy he is, put two and two together.

I don't think he doesn't care, but he'll keep his opinions largely to himself. He's ever the businessman, recognising that how he feels won't change my personality.

I'd rather he just yelled at me and got it over with. But hey, for good or ill, both my parents now know, and that's okay.


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## Jags (Nov 18, 2013)

It's nice they'll be supportive,  but knowing your offspring is gonna be halfway across the world has gotta hurt. At least they got time to come to terms with it.


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## BRN (Nov 18, 2013)

Rain-Wizard said:


> It's nice they'll be supportive,  but knowing your offspring is gonna be halfway across the world has gotta hurt. At least they got time to come to terms with it.



Eh, that's the bigger problem; they're not supportive. This'd be a lot easier 'with' their support, since this isn't something I'm willing to cave in on. 

You're right though, they'll come to terms with it. Eventually. |3 They'll start to support me once they realise I'm not backing down, but unfortunately, I can't force or argue that point. They'll have to realise it themselves, and that's going to take weathering a bit of a storm. Eheh.

It's just going to be a miserable few months when my mom's gone Cruella Deville and my dad's the epitome of _Son, I am_, 'specially now they've both worked out half of this is about a guy they haven't met and who means more to me than they're comfortable with.


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## CaptainCool (Nov 18, 2013)

BRN said:


> Light update; looks like my dad found out my plans to head to Canada and, being the smart guy he is, put two and two together.
> 
> I don't think he doesn't care, but he'll keep his opinions largely to himself. He's ever the businessman, recognising that how he feels won't change my personality.
> 
> I'd rather he just yelled at me and got it over with. But hey, for good or ill, both my parents now know, and that's okay.



I know that feeling. I would have prefered my dad telling me that he was disappointed when I had a boyfriend instead of him talking to my sister, who then told my mother and who then told me.


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## Jags (Nov 18, 2013)

The more ya weather,  the more they'll understand. And some stuff ya gotta do, for your own happiness. I was unfortunate that the naysayer of my plans was the person I actually needed the cooperation of...

But yeah, head held high buddy . Maybe they should talk to teh guy though? Might mean a lot to them to know him a little.


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## Darkwing (Nov 20, 2013)

Alright so for the past month I've been with a very wonderful boyfriend. However I only formally came out to my parents and no one else. 

I do a radio show that everyone I know listens in to, next week I'm having my boyfriend come on as a guest and I'm thinking about making an announcement and coming out live on-air. Any thoughts? I keep thinking that while it'd be incredibly risky, it would actually be a kind of unique and fun spin on coming out.


----------



## Hewge (Nov 20, 2013)

Darkwing said:


> Alright so for the past month I've been with a very wonderful boyfriend. However I only formally came out to my parents and no one else.
> 
> I do a radio show that everyone I know listens in to, next week I'm having my boyfriend come on as a guest and I'm thinking about making an announcement and coming out live on-air. Any thoughts? I keep thinking that while it'd be incredibly risky, it would actually be a kind of unique and fun spin on coming out.



I don't really see the point in telling a bunch of people you don't know that you're gay, and the ones you do know... Well, it's less obnoxious to just do it face to face instead of announcing on a radio for some reason.


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## Artillery Spam (Nov 20, 2013)

Milo said:


> I unwillingly came out to a few coworkers when I said out loud "that guy is adorable"
> 
> I thought I said that in my head.



Part of me wants to lol irl. 

Another part wants to tip his hat to you. 

And a small fraction of me wants to know what your coworkers did.


----------



## Darkwing (Nov 20, 2013)

Hewge said:


> I don't really see the point in telling a bunch of people you don't know that you're gay, and the ones you do know... Well, it's less obnoxious to just do it face to face instead of announcing on a radio for some reason.



Yeah you're right, good point. c:

Probably not smart doing it before thanksgiving anyways lol.


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## Lobar (Nov 20, 2013)

Darkwing said:


> Alright so for the past month I've been with a very wonderful boyfriend. However I only formally came out to my parents and no one else.
> 
> I do a radio show that everyone I know listens in to, next week I'm having my boyfriend come on as a guest and I'm thinking about making an announcement and coming out live on-air. Any thoughts? I keep thinking that while it'd be incredibly risky, it would actually be a kind of unique and fun spin on coming out.



Depends on the context of the radio show.  Are you a "personality" of this show such that the listeners would be interested in the developments of your personal life?


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## Darkwing (Nov 20, 2013)

Lobar said:


> Depends on the context of the radio show.  Are you a "personality" of this show such that the listeners would be interested in the developments of your personal life?



Sort of. Like a lot of people I know personally listen to me but strangers probably wouldn't care as much. Then again, me and him are going to be discussing MLP season 4 and whatnot the whole time so it's not like my show is super serious programming and I'm not trying to reach out to a crowd anyways. 

It issss kind of risky though and probably not as good as discussing face to face, even though it sounds fun in theory. I still have time to think on it regardless.


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## captainbrant (Nov 30, 2013)

.


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## Llamapotamus (Nov 30, 2013)

captainbrant said:


> Yesterday I came out as gay to my immediate family and one of my best high school friends. They aren't the first people I've told, but the first people that mattered. It wasn't something I felt I had to get off my chest, and I was surprised by how relieved and happy it made me feel. Now I feel as if I'd been overindulgent. Is coming out for no immediately important reason overindulgent? I don't really feel it is when I think of other people coming out, but I always used to when I considered doing it myself.



I suppose it's not overindulgent if you're tactful about it. If it has nothing to do with the current conversation, don't blurt it out like you have Tourette's...


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## fonduemaster (Dec 1, 2013)

Last friday my friend asked me if i was gay because she saw on facebook that i was liking pictures of furry femboys
I didnt know that you could see what your friends of FB liked
And i was all like: 
	

	
	
		
		

		
			




i lied about it and said that i tried to trick everyone. After like, 10 minutes i was calming down, then the sudden realisation hit me.
EVERYONE who was a friend of mine on facebook could see what i liked. i was all like: (reaction image again) again but like 10000x worse. Maybe everyone knows i'm gay now, fuck. I really hope I got lucky and they didn't see. oh my god i am dreading monday now when i go back to school. Maybe I should avoid my friends? i really dont want to come to terms with them about my secret...


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## Kitsune Cross (Dec 1, 2013)

fonduemaster said:


> Last friday my friend asked me if i was gay because she saw on facebook that i was liking pictures of furry femboys
> I didnt know that you could see what your friends of FB liked
> And i was all like:
> 
> ...



I think that was a good moment to play it cool, and say yes, without caring too much

btw, fuck facebook, it has absolutly not privacy at all, so annoying Â¬Â¬


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## fonduemaster (Dec 1, 2013)

Kitsune Cross said:


> btw, fuck facebook, it has absolutly not privacy at all, so annoying Â¬Â¬


I strongly agree, but how else will i keep in touch with my friends?

i think i've calmed down now. if they ask me I'll say that i wanted trick them like i did to my other friend, even though it probably wont work. I have no intention to say yes because I dont want to lose anyone. I'd feel horrible and i will get bullied for it


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## Kalmor (Dec 1, 2013)

fonduemaster said:


> I strongly agree, but how else will i keep in touch with my friends?
> 
> i think i've calmed down now. if they ask me I'll say that i wanted trick them like i did to my other friend, even though it probably wont work. I have no intention to say yes because I dont want to lose anyone. I'd feel horrible and i will get bullied for it


If your friends start to bully you about it (and break the friendship off) then they weren't  your friends in the first place.


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## fonduemaster (Dec 1, 2013)

Raptros said:


> If your friends start to bully you about it (and break the friendship off) then they weren't  your friends in the first place.


Even if they were the ones who helped me through tough times, cared for me and gave me good advice?


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## Kitsune Cross (Dec 1, 2013)

fonduemaster said:


> Even if they were the ones who helped me through tough times, cared for me and gave me good advice?



If they really are like that, then is would be perfect to tell them, because good advice, care and help through a tough time is what you need right now

seriously the answer is right in front of you


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## Leo McDowd (Dec 1, 2013)

I had a strange "coming out."

For many years, I was shy and I took little initiative in acting on my sexual impulses primarily because I didn't have any. Sex was never a top priority for me. I didn't know for sure if I was gay, straight or bisexual. When I hit 21, I found that I was comfortable with being in the company of men, but I wasn't sure if it was a "bromance" kind of thing or if I wanted to have a romantic relationship with men. I always liked women, but then again, I was shy. I started interpreting my shyness as an indication that maybe, just maybe I was gay. Still not knowing for sure, I experimented. The experimentation was awkward, but I thought, "Well, if I was willing to go that far to test my sexuality, maybe I am gay." Note the amount of "maybes" in this paragraph.

So I tried coming out on the worst day possible: my mother's birthday. I told my parents not only that I experimented, but that I was in a relationship with someone who I previously called a "friend" and invited him to my house throughout the holidays. Suffice to say, my parents were furious. They took what I did as a betrayal; that I pretended to act one way but was secretly living another life. I explained to them that they've made some deeply homophobic comments in the past and that pushed me into severe depression and secrecy. My parents and I had a rocky relationship for a year after I revealed that I was in a same-sex relationship. The relationship didn't last. I was too distraught to have any kind of relationship.

Eventually, I told my parents that the experimentation didn't work; that it felt more natural to be with women than men. Our relationship improved when I decided to focus on my life goals more than worrying about my sexuality. However, my sexuality is not set in stone. I consider it fluid. I realized that I'm more attracted to people's personality and character than sexual orientation. So the whole "coming out" thing was, in hindsight, unnecessary. I can't be attributed to certain labels. I am who I am.


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## Saiko (Dec 2, 2013)

I stand corrected. It appears that rather than tolerating my homosexuality, my parents are just ignoring it while they work up the courage to stop supporting me financially (i.e. effectively disown me without feeling guilty ). This is indicated by their having all of us sit at the table and tell me all the things that are supposedly wrong with my life, including their inability to "support this immoral lifestyle." They also forbade me from "corrupting" my little brother.

... The funny thing is that this will result in my car and bank accounts being in my name, and I make enough money to be self sufficient in college without loans. They are willfully blind to the fact that my standard of living is going to skyrocket if they go through with their threats. All I have to do is make it to January and keep a 3.0. xD


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## CaptainCool (Dec 2, 2013)

Saiko said:


> I stand corrected. It appears that rather than tolerating my homosexuality, my parents are just ignoring it while they work up the courage to stop supporting me financially (i.e. effectively disown me without feeling guilty ). This is indicated by their having all of us sit at the table and tell me all the things that are supposedly wrong with my life, including their inability to "support this immoral lifestyle." They also forbade me from "corrupting" my little brother.
> 
> ... The funny thing is that this will result in my car and bank accounts being in my name, and I make enough money to be self sufficient in college without loans. They are willfully blind to the fact that my standard of living is going to skyrocket if they go through with their threats. All I have to do is make it to January and keep a 3.0. xD



Well that freaking sucks :T "Immoral lifestyle"? "Corrupting your brother"? It seems to me like your parents have completely lost the plot.


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## Saiko (Dec 2, 2013)

CaptainCool said:


> Well that freaking sucks :T "Immoral lifestyle"? "Corrupting your brother"? It seems to me like your parents have completely lost the plot.


They never had the plot to begin with. Good riddance.

(Oh, and I also just got back from another bash-saiko talk with my dad. He couldn't leave for his trip without getting his week's worth of critique. This time the focus was on how I'm clearly not cut out for research and college because I still have to sign up for classes... despite the fact that I'm having to wait on the staff's breaks and vacations.)


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## powderhound (Dec 2, 2013)

Saiko said:


> This time the focus was on how I'm clearly not cut out for research and college because I still have to sign up for classes... despite the fact that I'm having to wait on the staff's breaks and vacations.)



What do your parents want from you? It sounds like your doing everything right. Financially independent, going to college, doing research... That's better than like 90% of America. What would he rather you do?


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## Blissful.Oblivion (Dec 2, 2013)

:c I feel really bad when I read/hear about other peoples' coming out/realization stories because mine was so peaceful and, well, easy. I figured it out in the latter part of 8th grade and immediately came out to about five closer friends (all of whom were perfectly okay), and then in my first year of high school I came out to two other people. One of those two constantly teased me about being so far in the closet (but in a totally friendly way; she asked me how Narnia was every day...), and about halfway through freshman year, I came out to pretty much everyone I knew. Even my parents. My mum told me that my immediate family knew since I was three, and my dad just said "yeah, I kind of figured." Ever since, I've been totally out to almost everyone I know and it's completely fine. I've only experienced discrimination twice, and both times it was quickly snuffed out one way or another. Which is why I feel kinda bad :c 
(fyi I live in California, which is probably a large factor in all of this. My parents specifically moved to California from the midwest in case my brother or I turned out gay or something.)


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## Conker (Dec 2, 2013)

What on earth where you doing at three that made you seem so...well, gay?


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## Blissful.Oblivion (Dec 2, 2013)

I've never asked... I think... maybe... it was the dolls???   > u <   I guess I was always _really_ feminine about things when I was younger. Although that changed. I'm not masculine, but I'm definitely not feminine. But yeah, probably the dolls...


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## Saiko (Dec 3, 2013)

powderhound said:


> What would he rather you do?


Anything but guys. :B

And no, I'm not doing research. I'm simply trying to get hired, which is difficult when you're stuck at home and the only relevant official credit you have is the first computer programming course.


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## In The Nightside Eclipse (Dec 3, 2013)

Damn, I really thought coming out would be the hard part..

The hardest part for me is trying to get some of my friends to believe me that I'm gay~ :/


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## kairi920 (Dec 3, 2013)

In The Nightside Eclipse said:


> Damn, I really thought coming out would be the hard part..
> 
> The hardest part for me is trying to get some of my friends to believe me that I'm gay~ :/


I had the same problem, it took me about two weeks to convince one of my friends I was serious... and I'm pretty sure my parents still don't think I'm serious either. :/


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## In The Nightside Eclipse (Dec 3, 2013)

kairi920 said:


> I had the same problem, it took me about two weeks to convince one of my friends I was serious... and I'm pretty sure my parents still don't think I'm serious either. :/



Now I have the absolutely fabulous task of Introducing my BF to my parents, as well as coming out to them.

Dis gon b fun.


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## Saiko (Dec 4, 2013)

In The Nightside Eclipse said:


> Now I have the absolutely fabulous task of Introducing my BF to my parents, as well as coming out to them.
> 
> Dis gon b fun.


For the love of god, come out before you introduce your bf if at all possible. If you make a mistake and go all-in, it could fuck you over. I dunno if your parents are the type to be concerned about, but mine certainly are; and it's made things interesting to say the least.


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## fonduemaster (Dec 4, 2013)

Saiko said:


> For the love of god, come out before you introduce your bf if at all possible. If you make a mistake and go all-in, it could fuck you over. I dunno if your parents are the type to be concerned about, but mine certainly are; and it's made things interesting to say the least.


Why would introducing the boyfriend and your sexuality at the same time be bad?


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## Distorted (Dec 4, 2013)

fonduemaster said:


> Why would introducing the boyfriend and your sexuality at the same time be bad?



I mean, if your folks aren't violent it'd be ok I guess...

My friend came over one day and my dad suspected him of being my boyfriend and I had to ask my friend to leave for his safety. My father doesn't get angry a lot, but when he does it's rather serious. 

I don't know how your family is, but just be careful.


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## Kitsune Cross (Dec 4, 2013)

Distorted said:


> I mean, if your folks aren't violent it'd be ok I guess...
> 
> My friend came over one day and my dad suspected him of being my boyfriend and I had to ask my friend to leave for his safety. My father doesn't get angry a lot, but when he does it's rather serious.
> 
> I don't know how your family is, but just be careful.



Dude I'm sorry, but I seriously want to kick your dad's ass


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## Distorted (Dec 4, 2013)

Kitsune Cross said:


> Dude I'm sorry, but I seriously want to kick your dad's ass



Lol, you'd be the first. He's kind of the reason I took self defense classes in the first place. He's not so bad....most of the time anyway.


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## Lobar (Dec 4, 2013)

fonduemaster said:


> Why would introducing the boyfriend and your sexuality at the same time be bad?



"Hey mom, I'm gay, AND here's the guy I've been seeing behind your back until now!"


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## fonduemaster (Dec 4, 2013)

Lobar said:


> "Hey mom, I'm gay, AND here's the guy I've been seeing behind your back until now!"


to me, that doesnt really sound like a problem if your parents arent violent and/or homophobic??


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## Jags (Dec 4, 2013)

fonduemaster said:


> to me, that doesnt really sound like a problem if your parents arent violent and/or homophobic??



It's kinda harsh, though. Imagine it the other way around, you wouldn't feel so good about it if it were your kid :/


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## fonduemaster (Dec 4, 2013)

Rain-Wizard said:


> It's kinda harsh, though. Imagine it the other way around, you wouldn't feel so good about it if it were your kid :/


Either i'm extremely oblivious or really dumb, because i dont see how that's harsh. i'm completely missing the point, am i?


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## captainbrant (Dec 4, 2013)

.


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## In The Nightside Eclipse (Dec 4, 2013)

I guess it would be more wise to not give them two shocks in one night, but they don't have much expectations as to what I should be like, so it should be fine when I finally decide to tell them.


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## Milo (Dec 5, 2013)

Lobar said:


> "Hey mom, I'm gay, AND here's the guy I've been seeing behind your back until now!"



one of the few times I'm going to disagree with this case.

I get just as annoyed as the next guy when it comes to pushing sexuality on other people, but at the same time, who fucking cares if you "overwhelm" someone in that way. my sister brags and shoves it in, that she dates people for their money, and then dumps them, and everyone in my family is not only ok with that, but they basically support her because at one point, she got married to a douchebag, and now everyone thinks she deserves to fuck over every guy in existence as compensation.

if I were a parent in any other family but my own, I'd be shocked and hurt that my child would do something like that in a relationship, but I'd probably put on a face, because I'd want what makes my child happy. and I'm 90% certain most parents do this anyway, because I KNOW my sister isn't the only one who fucks with relationships. so after facing something like that, a gay son introducing his boyfriend to his mother doesn't seem so bad.


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## Fallowfox (Dec 5, 2013)

...I don't want what makes my kid happy if it's making everyone else's kids unhappy by screwing them over for their money. That's actually an example where it_ is_ justifiable to be disgusted.


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## Butters Shikkon (Dec 5, 2013)

Some people just enjoy being assholes. I'm not shocked.


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## Milo (Dec 5, 2013)

Fallowfox said:


> ...I don't want what makes my kid happy if it's making everyone else's kids unhappy by screwing them over for their money. That's actually an example where it_ is_ justifiable to be disgusted.



my point is, I don't really see the problem with coming out and introducing your boyfriend at the same time. as long as you do it right I mean. don't be like "accept me for who I am, or I'm running awaaaaay!"

I mean that having your boyfriend there isn't going to change whether or not the parent is ok with it. if your mother is going to disband you for being gay, you might as well have someone you love, by your side to help you through it. I mean what better way to prevent a possible suicide (a statistic that's shockingly high), than to have him there with you to tell you it'll be ok?


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## Lobar (Dec 5, 2013)

Milo said:


> one of the few times I'm going to disagree with this case.
> 
> I get just as annoyed as the next guy when it comes to pushing sexuality on other people, but at the same time, who fucking cares if you "overwhelm" someone in that way. my sister brags and shoves it in, that she dates people for their money, and then dumps them, and everyone in my family is not only ok with that, but they basically support her because at one point, she got married to a douchebag, and now everyone thinks she deserves to fuck over every guy in existence as compensation.
> 
> if I were a parent in any other family but my own, I'd be shocked and hurt that my child would do something like that in a relationship, but I'd probably put on a face, because I'd want what makes my child happy. and I'm 90% certain most parents do this anyway, because I KNOW my sister isn't the only one who fucks with relationships. so after facing something like that, a gay son introducing his boyfriend to his mother doesn't seem so bad.



The bigger issue is that it puts your boyfriend in the line of fire if it goes badly, which is something you don't really want to do to someone you love.


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## MEEHOO (Dec 11, 2013)

Iv told everyone except my brother 

I feel bad about not telling him but we're really close and I dont want to damage that
Its just things he's said in the past make me think he would be angry/upset if I was to tell him


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## Saiko (Dec 11, 2013)

fonduemaster said:


> to me, that doesnt really sound like a problem if your parents arent violent and/or homophobic??


Well, mine happen to be homophobic, but the only thing that gets them to show that is my being gay. Otherwise you wouldn't know, and I myself wasn't sure where they'd land on the spectrum until after I came out.

It took three "coming outs" to make it stick, the last of which consisted of me driving myself 1000 miles and back under the pretense of going to my apartment and calling them a few hours away to say I was bringing my boyfriend home. Dad's immediate response was for me to drive him all the way back. He amended that to him buying a bus ticket, but as I said earlier, it's become clear that I am going to be financially disowned because of all this. I myself am set up to be perfectly fine without my family, but not everyone is.

Don't bluff if you're going to play hardball basically. If you're going to go all-in, you had better be ready to lose; and coming out to an anti-gay family via introducing your boyfriend is going all-in.



Lobar said:


> "Hey mom, I'm gay, AND here's the guy I've been seeing behind your back until now!"


This is precisely the interpretation that my parents won't shut up about. They are mad that I didn't talk to them about any of it, yet conveniently ignore the fact that the only context under which they will actually "discuss" it is if I'm trying to change. Otherwise it's a 2 hour rant on why I'm wrong.



captainbrant said:


> I think in most cases it wouldn't result in anything bad. it's just less considerate, because coming out can be a shock for a family. you shouldn't plan to shock your family twice in one night


This too, but I was more referring to how a family can act while in shock. Mine turned out to be rather poisonous in such a state.



Milo said:


> my point is, I don't really see the problem with coming out and introducing your boyfriend at the same time. as long as you do it right I mean. don't be like "accept me for who I am, or I'm running awaaaaay!"


It's less about what should be and more about reality and how some families react.


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## Blissful.Oblivion (Dec 11, 2013)

MEEHOO said:


> Iv told everyone except my brother
> 
> I feel bad about not telling him but we're really close and I dont want to damage that
> Its just things he's said in the past make me think he would be angry/upset if I was to tell him



What has he said? Lots of guys make terribly homophobic sounding comments or jokes but when it comes down to it they're actually fine. :s


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## gorgonops (Dec 12, 2013)

Man, I tortured myself for _years _over this. I was afraid that I was going to disappoint my parents, or that my friends wouldn't believe me (for some reason). My best friend had to basically pry it out of me with booze after some weird comment I made about the lady at a merch booth hitting on me. My conversation with my father was two hours long, involved a lot of worldview discussions, and left us closer as people. They were Very Serious Conversations.

And everyone's response was still pretty much, "Yeah, we'd guessed." Coming out got a lot more casual after I cottoned on to that.

I mean, I told my youngest brother by messaging him in World of Warcraft. :I

I lucked out with my family and friends on that front, for sure. My cousin also came out as a lesbian, her mother sent her to christian counseling, and I'm not sure of the rest of the details, but it ended with my cousin moving out at 17. I'm grateful that my immediate family was more accepting.


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## Newol Fate (Dec 12, 2013)

Honestly... I don't know where I sit in all of this. I've never had a problem with the odds and ends sexualities of the world, no. I for one actually kind of like the diversity. But for the longest time I sat very comfortably in my heterosexuality. But within the past few months my feelings have changed some what, and I mean, I've fine with it, hell. I didn't waste time telling my friends that I'm bi, and honestly, the worst response I got was "Oh god, you don't have a thing for me, do you? No? On thank God." As far as my friends go, Nothing's changed. Of course I guess it helps that my close circle of friends is so very eccentric. But as for my parents. Oh Hell No. They don't know crap, and I plan to keep it that way. Like Saiko said, If your going to go All In, which is bringing somebody home and forcing your parents to accept it, You better be prepared to lose. Regardless of how things seem. I'd like for the world to be accepting and judge people based on how they act rather then things like this. But it ain't. 

But if I'm honest... The only thing I've ever really been bothered about by all this is quite simply, How the hell did it happen? I mean, I'm just confused by it. Not upset, but just confused. I swear it seems like ten minutes ago I was perfectly straight, and now I'm not. Its like it just happened and I don't have any reason why.


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## Swoocerini (Dec 19, 2013)

I've been lucky to have extremely supportive friends, and while some were surprised they were merely curious and I feel I have helped them think differently about the LGBT community. Surprisingly, I thought my dad was the one that was OK with it and my mum wasn't which would have been totally unexpected, but I think my dad was a little shocked and now he's a little iffy about it; more about me having a boyfriend than anything I think. My mum is 100% supportive, loves my bf and is very happy for me, as is my entire family more or less. I guess I have been very lucky, and that ain't bad. I was futuristic about my coming out, and did so via Facebook when I said I was in a relationship with *_dun dun dunnn_* A MAN *_thunder and lightning_* and I had people message me, mostly curious as they didn't expect it but were supportive nonetheless, and that's really all that matters to me.

Goodness is it a relief though. A weird one: where you wait for the notifications to roll in (if you're tech-swaggy like me obviously), but being met with praise and not prejudice is a wonderful feeling, and to know the whole world is excepting the LGBT community is fantastic and I am glad to be a part of it.


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## Blissful.Oblivion (Dec 19, 2013)

Swoocerini said:


> I've been lucky to have extremely supportive friends, and while some were surprised they were merely curious and I feel I have helped them think differently about the LGBT community. Surprisingly, I thought my dad was the one that was OK with it and my mum wasn't which would have been totally unexpected, but I think my dad was a little shocked and now he's a little iffy about it; more about me having a boyfriend than anything I think. My mum is 100% supportive, loves my bf and is very happy for me, as is my entire family more or less. I guess I have been very lucky, and that ain't bad. I was futuristic about my coming out, and did so via Facebook when I said I was in a relationship with *_dun dun dunnn_* A MAN *_thunder and lightning_* and I had people message me, mostly curious as they didn't expect it but were supportive nonetheless, and that's really all that matters to me.
> 
> Goodness is it a relief though. A weird one: where you wait for the notifications to roll in (if you're tech-swaggy like me obviously), but being met with praise and not prejudice is a wonderful feeling, and to know the whole world is excepting the LGBT community is fantastic and I am glad to be a part of it.



Yay! A happy story! It's always nice to see happy LGBT stories ; Ï… ;


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## DeCatt (Dec 29, 2013)

I have no personal need to "come out" as my sexuality should not be of concern to anyone but me and my partner. To me at least, coming out is a bad idea as it makes something that should not be a big deal a big deal. I think if we really want LGBT acceptance in society, we've got to stop acting like it's something shameful that we have to confess. My two cents. I don't think anyone I know, apart from people I don't like anyway, would either be shocked or surprised if I turned up at their doorstep with a male partner, but if I made a big deal about it all of a sudden, they might. So I'm not in the closet, I guess I'm walking around in the hallway.


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## Hewge (Dec 29, 2013)

My hair turned pink when I came out.

It was fucking horrible.


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## Butters Shikkon (Dec 29, 2013)

Hewge said:


> My hair turned pink when I came out.
> 
> It was fucking horrible.



It wasn't the only thing that turned pink I'm sure. ;v


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## Hewge (Dec 29, 2013)

Butterflygoddess said:


> It wasn't the only thing that turned pink I'm sure. ;v



What the heck is that supposed to mean?! D:


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## Nezthefox (Jan 3, 2014)

After seeing all this, all I can say is that a situation like coming out can never be as bad as it is in your mind. When I came out I was almost certine my mother, a devoted christian would never want to see me again but my entire family was fine with it but no one here knows my family so don't think I wasn't scared about the others as well.


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## fonduemaster (Jan 4, 2014)

Hewge said:


> My hair turned pink when I came out.
> 
> It was fucking horrible.


I dont understand???


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## Gator Joe (Jan 5, 2014)

I grew up in a devout Catholic home. I, myself, am a devout Catholic and will never lose my faith. I never "came out," per say. I believe that if heterosexuals do not have to tell people what they are, it should be the same for everyone of any sexual preference. Like heterosexuals, I just let people notice what I am from my personality and my actions. However, that is very difficult for some people because I am far from the stereotypical homosexual. If anything, I am a stereotypical redneck (to a certain point). Even with me never telling people what I am (unless they ask), they can still sometimes figure it out. I see no problem with not "coming out." People should never assume what someone is, whether it is identity, race, religion, or sexual orientation. I never assume what people are, and I usually do not ask. To me, it does not matter what you are. If you are nice and I can relate to you and get along with you, then I like you.


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## Hooky (Jan 12, 2014)

Skree said:


> I came out as bisexual to my parents a few years ago.  They were overjoyed.  My dads rock. \m/


They do indeed. I wonder how my parents would react if I told them that there is a large probability of myself being bisexual.
They probably wouldn't mind, I mean they're very open people.


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## Hooky (Jan 12, 2014)

Hewge said:


> My hair turned pink when I came out.
> 
> It was fucking horrible.





Butters Shikkon said:


> It wasn't the only thing that turned pink I'm sure. ;v





Hewge said:


> What the heck is that supposed to mean?! D:



I'll assume that you just took a shower after coating yourself with Cobalt Chloride. (Keeps any innuendos away)


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## Misomie (Jan 27, 2014)

I'm pretty sure this is the right place to post. For ages now I've just thought of myself as, well, me because other females were different. Even as a kid I associated with guys more than girls because I just didn't feel like I belonged. Lately I've been doing research and all signs point to me actually being transgendered. I've never thought of this as the case before but it does make tons of sense (and I do means tons). For example I've always been more attracted to feminine guys (and in the rare case, girls that look like feminine guys) than more masculine guys. I've also always been super competitive and rather aggressive (more of if angered I'm more likely to result in physical violence than emotional violence). I don't feel the need to compete with other girls (unless they are literally a direct threat) like I do with guys. My boyfriend has even stated multiple timed that I act more like a guy than a girl (he said I would be better off as a lesbian a few times as well) because of stuff such as valuing logic over emotions, general calmness, laziness with look presentation, disdain towards perfumes and make-up, love of video games, it goes on and on really. I also feel detached from being a female. I know that I'm biologically female but I feel as if I'd be better off if I was born a male and I feel more at ease with them, like I belong. I have very little to no desire in letting people know I might be trans (as I feel no need in why it'd be important for them to know as I've always been me). So am I trans? Or am I just blowing my tomboyness out of proportion?


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## Kitsune Cross (Jan 27, 2014)

Misomie said:


> I'm pretty sure this is the right place to post. For ages now I've just thought of myself as, well, me because other females were different. Even as a kid I associated with guys more than girls because I just didn't feel like I belonged. Lately I've been doing research and all signs point to me actually being transgendered. I've never thought of this as the case before but it does make tons of sense (and I do means tons). For example I've always been more attracted to feminine guys (and in the rare case, girls that look like feminine guys) than more masculine guys. I've also always been super competitive and rather aggressive (more of if angered I'm more likely to result in physical violence than emotional violence). I don't feel the need to compete with other girls (unless they are literally a direct threat) like I do with guys. My boyfriend has even stated multiple timed that I act more like a guy than a girl (he said I would be better off as a lesbian a few times as well) because of stuff such as valuing logic over emotions, general calmness, laziness with look presentation, disdain towards perfumes and make-up, love of video games, it goes on and on really. I also feel detached from being a female. I know that I'm biologically female but I feel as if I'd be better off if I was born a male and I feel more at ease with them, like I belong. I have very little to no desire in letting people know I might be trans (as I feel no need in why it'd be important for them to know as I've always been me). So am I trans? Or am I just blowing my tomboyness out of proportion?



You seem like a pretty cool girl, surely not the typical girl but I don't really think that behavior is odd enough to think you are actually a boy, I don't know you to actually tell, I'm not a psychologist either


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## Misomie (Jan 30, 2014)

Kitsune Cross said:


> You seem like a pretty cool girl, surely not the typical girl but I don't really think that behavior is odd enough to think you are actually a boy, I don't know you to actually tell, I'm not a psychologist either



That was just some of it. I actually only recently started considering it at all because I realized I've started to imagine myself with a penis (this started at least a month or two ago and I have no clue what triggered it). Other than that I mainly wear guy clothes (possessing few girl clothes anymore as I can't stand how they feel/look). I dunno. Thing is I can see myself keeping my female body or getting the male body (both have pros and cons). Most of my life I've hated my body but just recently (past few years) I've grown to accept it and even like it (because I have that slim-slightly athletic build people seem to desire). However I hate being grouped with other females, I know that. I feel like I'm neither gender, just me. 

I dunno, if nothing does change, I know I'm a biological female (I always will be no matter what as surgery can't change genetics) and I'm just me and I can live with that. I'm just exploring while I'm young.


----------



## Hooky (Jan 30, 2014)

Misomie said:


> I'm pretty sure this is the right place to post. For ages now I've just thought of myself as, well, me because other females were different. Even as a kid I associated with guys more than girls because I just didn't feel like I belonged. Lately I've been doing research and all signs point to me actually being transgendered. I've never thought of this as the case before but it does make tons of sense (and I do means tons). For example I've always been more attracted to feminine guys (and in the rare case, girls that look like feminine guys) than more masculine guys. I've also always been super competitive and rather aggressive (more of if angered I'm more likely to result in physical violence than emotional violence). I don't feel the need to compete with other girls (unless they are literally a direct threat) like I do with guys. My boyfriend has even stated multiple timed that I act more like a guy than a girl (he said I would be better off as a lesbian a few times as well) because of stuff such as valuing logic over emotions, general calmness, laziness with look presentation, disdain towards perfumes and make-up, love of video games, it goes on and on really. I also feel detached from being a female. I know that I'm biologically female but I feel as if I'd be better off if I was born a male and I feel more at ease with them, like I belong. I have very little to no desire in letting people know I might be trans (as I feel no need in why it'd be important for them to know as I've always been me). So am I trans? Or am I just blowing my tomboyness out of proportion?


I don't think there's valid criteria for being a man/woman mentally. It's kinda blurry around the edges, like a spectrum of slight variation. It may depend on whether you are really phased about being "one or the other" or generally not bothered.


----------



## septango (Feb 6, 2014)

@miso (srry cant quote)- trans stuff can be super confusing, but I like to think you are trans if you actively desire to be another gender, regardless of how tomboyish or wether or not your brain leans to male or female, so "am I trans" isnt really a yes or no question its about how you feel

oh and as far as feeling "nither gender" there are people who identify as either "agender" or "bigender", heh and yeah as a male-bodied person who pictures themselves with boobs, I can say figuring this shit out can be a trip


----------



## M town wolf (Feb 8, 2014)

I think that you should be able to be what ever you want to be and be proud of it


----------



## Kamek_Sans (Feb 8, 2014)

I'm thinking of coming out subtly over facebook

If you can't tell from my title
I am in fact
_turbo gay_


----------



## Misomie (Feb 11, 2014)

@septango- Actually Bigender or Agender fit me a lot more than full on Trans at the moment. I think I'll begin to consider myself one of those (whichever is closer) at least until I know for sure. If I never find out, oh well, I'm happy with myself. :3


----------



## Rooko (Feb 11, 2014)

I'm gay and I'm not coming out of the closet until I get a boyfriend. You know what? Not even then. People will know I'm gay when they SEE me being gay with another man...no not in bed..But I'm seriously only going to be telling anyone that I'm gay only if they ask/only if they find out by observing lovin'. I just don't see the point of waving it in people's faces.


----------



## Falafox (Feb 11, 2014)

I am actually afraid of coming out. There, I said it, I am a little wuss.


----------



## Misomie (Feb 11, 2014)

I think it's sad that people even have to come out. Straight people don't so why should others have to, you know?


----------



## Rooko (Feb 12, 2014)

I agree, and thats why I'm not making a big deal about coming out. I think once we start acting like normal people, we'll be treated as normal people. At least, act like we are normal instead of acting like we are special things, crying of our plight.


----------



## Kitsune Cross (Feb 12, 2014)

Mom, dad, I have something to tell you, I'm straight, please don't hate me


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Feb 13, 2014)

Kitsune Cross said:


> Mom, dad, I have something to tell you, I'm straight, please don't hate me



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFioGLmD7WE


----------



## Aleu (Feb 13, 2014)

Misomie said:


> I think it's sad that people even have to come out. Straight people don't so why should others have to, you know?



Because straight people don't deal with harassment because of their orientation by a majority?
Or was that rhetorical? I'm too tired


----------



## Misomie (Feb 13, 2014)

Aleu said:


> Because straight people don't deal with harassment because of their orientation by a majority?
> Or was that rhetorical? I'm too tired



It's sad because that harassment exists. It shouldn't. I dunno, the close-mindedness of people just ticks me off.


----------



## Falafox (Feb 14, 2014)

Misomie said:


> It's sad because that harassment exists. It shouldn't. I dunno, the close-mindedness of people just ticks me off.


It isn't just close minded people. If you see something out of normal charts you will be either scared, disgusted, curious or you will not care. The last 2 dosen't really happens too often sadly so many of the people think negative about furries because it isn't normal for their standards. This over the years have been getting better at making people understand things like this.

Maybe I am just wrong as always.


----------



## blg4396 (Feb 15, 2014)

I know I am not the only one, but I just recently decided to accept myself as gay, but I have trouble expressing it. No one knows that I am gay and I can't figure out any way to tell my friends or family, but I know they aren't judgemental. This is the first time I tell anyone about my sexual orentation and now I feel a little better to let it out. 

I hope I can find the courage to tell them soon.


----------



## Kosdu (Feb 15, 2014)

blg4396 said:


> I know I am not the only one, but I just recently decided to accept myself as gay, but I have trouble expressing it. No one knows that I am gay and I can't figure out any way to tell my friends or family, but I know they aren't judgemental. This is the first time I tell anyone about my sexual orentation and now I feel a little better to let it out.
> 
> I hope I can find the courage to tell them soon.



It is more accepting it as part of your life and who you are. 

If you feel that that is a part of it, then it must be done.



If they seem shocked or dismayed, it can be because they think it is something that will harm you, due to assholes. Just be patient and love them for who they are.


----------



## blg4396 (Feb 16, 2014)

I just wish that some people weren't so judgemental towards something that is completely natural.


----------



## KAS3519 (Feb 16, 2014)

blg4396 said:


> I just wish that some people weren't so judgemental towards something that is completely natural.



"BUT TEH BIBL SAYZ U CANT BE GHEY!"
I'm an Atheist, and I see nothing wrong with being gay. What I don't understand is how people expect everyone to obey a 2,000 year old book.
If you follow it, fine. Demanding other people follow it, not so much.


----------



## Rooko (Feb 16, 2014)

KAS3519 said:


> "BUT TEH BIBL SAYZ U CANT BE GHEY!"
> I'm an Atheist, and I see nothing wrong with being gay. What I don't understand is how people expect everyone to obey a 2,000 year old book.
> If you follow it, fine. Demanding other follow it, not so much.



The simple fact of the matter is, the book is an excuse for people's hatred. A lot of "Christians" have barely even read the bible, and yet here we are, with people saying that God condones their hatred.


----------



## blg4396 (Feb 16, 2014)

Despite being non-religious, I know a couple of Christians who agree that some people misinterpreted the bible and go only based on their own selfish whims.


----------



## KAS3519 (Feb 16, 2014)

blg4396 said:


> Despite being non-religious, I know a couple of Christians who agree that some people misinterpreted the bible and go only based on their own selfish whims.



Telling someone how to live their life should be frowned upon, whether it be for religious reasons or not.


----------



## Wax (Feb 21, 2014)

KAS3519 said:


> Telling someone how to live their life should be frowned upon, whether it be for religious reasons or not.


Unless they, you know, kill people or something.


----------



## Destova (Feb 21, 2014)

I would tell my story but it's sadly very generic. I got extremely lucky and I'm aware of it, and I sometimes feel so terrible for the people that have to struggle on something so gods damned unimportant. 

Just know guys and gals, it does get better. Not to sound like some generic Savage-style person making a video for that Project, but I promise it does. I've been out for 6 years as of Feb 14 (I know the date, and sadly it wasn't even a crush I came out to, it just happened to have happened on that day) and every year I become more comfortable with myself as a person and in general. I don't go parading it around, that's not my style, but I am more than confident enough now to answer anything anyone asks me about it. 

My only regret is I made such a big deal of it. I mean, like I said, I got extremely lucky compared to some, but I look back now and it was such a pitiful thing to see the younger me in that position. I was in the worst depression of my life, I was so dark, and it was a giant, giant weight off my shoulders telling my closest friend. All he said to me was "I'll see you at school man, and I WILL still be jumping on your back".

It gets better. I sound so dingy saying that, I know, but it does. Just read the steps at the beginning of this thread. I read through those earlier and I sincerely wish I had had that kind of help when I did it. I have never something more awesomely written than what is at the beginning of this thread.


----------



## KAS3519 (Feb 22, 2014)

Rooko said:


> I'm gay and I'm not coming out of the closet until I get a boyfriend. You know what? Not even then. People will know I'm gay when they SEE me being gay with another man...no not in bed..But I'm seriously only going to be telling anyone that I'm gay only if they ask/only if they find out by observing lovin'. I just don't see the point of waving it in people's faces.



How do you expect to get a boyfriend if people don't know you're gay? Chances are if a gay person likes you, but thinks you're straight, they won't ask you out. 
(I know from experience)


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 22, 2014)

Destova said:


> I would tell my story but it's sadly very generic. I got extremely lucky and I'm aware of it, and I sometimes feel so terrible for the people that have to struggle on something so gods damned unimportant.
> 
> Just know guys and gals, it does get better. Not to sound like some generic Savage-style person making a video for that Project, but I promise it does. I've been out for 6 years as of Feb 14 (I know the date, and sadly it wasn't even a crush I came out to, it just happened to have happened on that day) and every year I become more comfortable with myself as a person and in general. I don't go parading it around, that's not my style, but I am more than confident enough now to answer anything anyone asks me about it.
> 
> ...


The fact that you're in Texas and came out to one of your best friends is enough to warrant friends.

I was lucky enough to have friends throughout my entire school life. The same 4 friends the entire way through. When I told them after I dropped out, not one of them said any BS about it being wrong or whatever. They were really supportive.

The thing that was truly surprising to me was that 3 of the 4 were catholics. I thought for sure they'd abandon me, but they just put it behind them.

I  had 'Faith in Humanity Restored' in bright red letters flashing in my head. I felt really happy at that point.


----------



## Kosdu (Feb 22, 2014)

KAS3519 said:


> How do you expect to get a boyfriend if people don't know you're gay? Chances are if a gay person likes you, but thinks you're straight, they won't ask you out.
> (I know from experience)



It's pretty easy to tell if you are gay even if not saying it.

There is a reason the fellow at the taco bell near my house gives me discounts, and no word has been spoken saying I'm taken. I just try to be nice if not flirty.


The best solution I have found is to be casual, but be intelligent in who you tell where.



I'm actually really sweet, but that denial and depression I had when younger makes it hard for me to show it/feel it.


----------



## Destova (Feb 22, 2014)

Kosdu: I love your avatar.

Migoto Da: The friend I came out to was Catholic as well. Most of the rest of my friends are Southern Baptist. Texas is blood red, but there are a few folks who believe what they believe while still being open about it. I can't say all of them totally AGREE with it, because I know they don't, but I'm just too nice for them to completely hate me. xD


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## Migoto Da (Feb 22, 2014)

People surprise you in a lot of ways, I suppose.


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## Destova (Feb 22, 2014)

Migoto Da said:


> People surprise you in a lot of ways, I suppose.



It's why I try to get to know anyone who is even remotely interested in knowing me. There are so many unique people in this world, and every single one of them can brighten your life, even in the tiniest of ways, if you let them.


----------



## Wax (Feb 22, 2014)

Destova said:


> It's why I try to get to know anyone who is even remotely interested in knowing me. There are so many unique people in this world, and every single one of them can brighten your life, even in the tiniest of ways, if you let them.


That's quite an optimistic view you have there. A good view though, keep it.


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## Destova (Feb 22, 2014)

Yeah it's more optimistic than I sometimes should be, but it's almost certainly made me feel a LOT better about my life and how I live it. 

What's sad is that while I hold this very optimistic view, my shyness can sometimes overrule it. More easily than I wish. :/


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> Kosdu: I love your avatar.
> 
> Migoto Da: The friend I came out to was Catholic as well. Most of the rest of my friends are Southern Baptist. Texas is blood red, but there are a few folks who believe what they believe while still being open about it. I can't say all of them totally AGREE with it, because I know they don't, but I'm just too nice for them to completely hate me. xD



Texas is so weird. I honestly expected many of my friends to start disliking me.
But nope, if anything, I've gotten more social when I came out. It's strange no?


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Texas is one of the stranger places. It's deep south, and there are some intolerant pricks, but most people are nice.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> Texas is one of the stranger places. It's deep south, and there are some intolerant pricks, but most people are nice.



I think they are more in concentrated, countryside towns. I dunno, I never really get out much.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Yeah I can confirm that the small towns are BAD if you're out of the ordinary in any way. I worked with the railroad as a van driver, so I got to stop a lot. It's not happened to me personally but I've witnessed it with others.


----------



## Kosdu (Feb 23, 2014)

Oklahoma has alot of nice people too, something that many people forget.

Hell, nobody really cares in a negative way that I'm gay, that I've met.

People here are just... Different.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Kosdu said:


> Oklahoma has alot of nice people too, something that many people forget.
> 
> Hell, nobody really cares in a negative way that I'm gay, that I've met.
> 
> People here are just... Different.



I've got a good friend (not gay, but pretty weird himself) who lives in Tulsa. Says it's a really nice place at least. I've only been once to help his family move there, and we were only there about an hour. Didn't even stop anywhere. 

Long freaking 6 hour drive though. Granted my car broke down in El Reno on the way there. xD

Still, Dallas seems like a shorter drive than Tulsa was. I just don't like Okey roads.


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

My grandmother lives in Durant, and they're a really churchgoing community; everyone up there doesn't seem to mind me being gay though. I thought for sure that it wouldn't be the case, but it seems that people really just don't care up there as long as you're a good person.

I think the whole 'Oh most Oklahomans are assholes' thing is entirely overblown, to be honest. I've never met anyone in OK that has been crude due to me being me. I don't really flaunt it around at all, in fact I prefer to keep it to myself IRL, but word just travels fast there I suppose.


It's like the total opposite here. I heard Dallas ain't as bad as it used to be though.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Dallas has an extensive gay community... Least from the few times I've been. Granted most of my stays were in Denton. Such a nice place, can't WAIT to move there. 

And Okeys aren't assholes per se unless they're driving. I hate Okey drivers... And Okey roads... >.>

Otherwise they act like Texans with strange accents.


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> Dallas has an extensive gay community...


Odd. Maybe I was just in the wrong part of Dallas then.



			
				Destova said:
			
		

> And Okeys aren't assholes per se unless they're driving.



Dear god yes.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Migoto Da said:


> Odd. Maybe I was just in the wrong part of Dallas then.
> 
> 
> 
> Dear god yes.



Most of my contacts came from Arlington. Dunno what it is about Arlington, but there seems to be a large amount of folks there. 

And hey you live in Denton! xD I'll probably be moving there in the next couple of years. I loved Denton. Such a nice little town.


----------



## Kosdu (Feb 23, 2014)

I remember my home in Lawton, gassed up at the closest gas station in which I'm pretty sure atleast one of the gals there was gay or bi. People would come in and be welcome and friendly, young and old, white and black, all types of people.

At the highschool I went to, no homophobia. No real assholes.

If you ever stop there, feel free to be yourself. I'm pretty sure you'll be safe, it's a nice military and nice okie town. But be sure to visit the wichitas and medicine park too.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Seems like there's a lot of Southerners in this thread all of a sudden lol.


----------



## Kosdu (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> Seems like there's a lot of Southerners in this thread all of a sudden lol.



I really do not consider Texas or Oklahoma part of the south.

We're kinda alot better than that.


Although north-eastern -.-


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Then what would we be...? xD

Our state governments are certainly about as retar-southern as it gets sometimes...


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> Most of my contacts came from Arlington. Dunno what it is about Arlington, but there seems to be a large amount of folks there.
> 
> And hey you live in Denton! xD I'll probably be moving there in the next couple of years. I loved Denton. Such a nice little town.


It is a nice little place. Lewisville (where I live) is filled with all sorts of people, most of them good. It's mainly the kids that are absolute bellends.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Feb 23, 2014)

Apparently, there ARE gay bars in Texarkana. I was told to be careful by a gay friend of mine who lives in town, cause there's weird old guys there. But other than that, there's not much about my town I can talk gay about cause I don't know many gay guys here


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

I'mmmm not really one for the whole gay bar thing. I don't really like bars at all (I'm insta designated driver for my friends who do drink, simply cause I don't). I get tipsy off a glass of wine lol. 

I know Amarillo has a few gay bars, but I've not been to any. Just really not my scene.


----------



## dialup (Feb 23, 2014)

Migoto Da said:


> It is a nice little place. Lewisville (where I live) is filled with all sorts of people, most of them good. It's mainly the kids that are absolute bellends.


Awww shit that's where I live too. 

We should all go to Mable Peabody's Beauty Supply and Chainsaw Repair in Denton.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

dialup said:


> Awww shit that's where I live too.
> 
> We should all go to Mable Peabody's Beauty Supply and Chainsaw Repair in Denton.



Something like this exists...?


----------



## dialup (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> Something like this exists...?



It's actually a gay club, bahahaha. The name just cracks me up.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

dialup said:


> It's actually a gay club, bahahaha. The name just cracks me up.



That makes so much more sense than what my effed up mind was coming up with xD


----------



## dialup (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> That makes so much more sense than what my effed up mind was coming up with xD


Haha, I thought the same thing when I heard the name too. But I went there for a drag show once. It was quite nice and everyone's really friendly if you ever do decide to go to a bar and when you move to the area.

Of course my favorite one is on Fry Street. $2 frozen margaritas before 11 p.m is great.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Yeah I don't plan on drinking any time soon.

I wouldn't be against a furries night out in Dallas though. xD


----------



## dialup (Feb 23, 2014)

Destova said:


> Yeah I don't plan on drinking any time soon.
> 
> I wouldn't be against a furries night out in Dallas though. xD


Oh that sounds like fun. I'm in Dallas during the week too.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Yeah I still live about 6 hours north west, it'll be a year or two. xD


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

dialup said:


> Awww shit that's where I live too.
> 
> We should all go to Mable Peabody's Beauty Supply and Chainsaw Repair in Denton.


Hehe, glad there's more than one person here in the area.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

I think we all hijacked this thread. hehe


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

I do believe we did. Oops.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Hehe so yeah.

I've enjoyed the conversation though. Nice to connect with others. I don't really talk to any gay folks around here. Not any interested in me and vice versa. I hate this town sometimes. :/


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

It truly is a unique opportunity, especially with people in close proximity.

I do not know anyone personally who is gay in this place, but I do know people who live in the county who are.


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Sounds like that furries night out might be a good thing.


----------



## dialup (Feb 23, 2014)

Migoto Da said:


> It truly is a unique opportunity, especially with people in close proximity.
> 
> I do not know anyone personally who is gay in this place, but I do know people who live in the county who are.


I'm pansexual. There's a lot of us around here all over the spectrum, surprisingly enough.


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

dialup said:


> I'm pansexual. There's a lot of us around here all over the spectrum, surprisingly enough.


It doesn't help that I pretty much have no social life outside of school, which didn't end well. Only recently started to get out there and active again, and it reminded me how great social interaction was when people weren't trying to belittle and harass you.


----------



## Jags (Feb 23, 2014)

I suppose I should finally man up and admit it

I'm bi, but learning Het. about 75/25 split, were I to put a figure to it, but it changes every day to be honest.

Not the most coming out anyone's done ever, but took me 4 years to get here. I feel better.


----------



## dialup (Feb 23, 2014)

Migoto Da said:


> It doesn't help that I pretty much have no social life outside of school, which didn't end well. Only recently started to get out there and active again, and it reminded me how great social interaction was when people weren't trying to belittle and harass you.



Aw man, I know how that goes. Cutting toxic people out of your life makes it so much easier, especially when it comes to socializing.


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 23, 2014)

dialup said:


> Aw man, I know how that goes. Cutting toxic people out of your life makes it so much easier, especially when it comes to socializing.


Definitely. When I met up with another member of the forum a few months back, it was an amazing experience, even though we started small by just hanging out at Six Flags down in Arlington, haha


----------



## Destova (Feb 23, 2014)

Jags said:


> I suppose I should finally man up and admit it
> 
> I'm bi, but learning Het. about 75/25 split, were I to put a figure to it, but it changes every day to be honest.
> 
> Not the most coming out anyone's done ever, but took me 4 years to get here. I feel better.



Each person is their own, with their own methods. Coming out, even if it's just on a forum where no one knows your real name, can be just as helpful as telling a best friend. Everyone is unique, with their own way of feeling. =3


----------



## Kosdu (Feb 23, 2014)

Jags said:


> I suppose I should finally man up and admit it
> 
> I'm bi, but learning Het. about 75/25 split, were I to put a figure to it, but it changes every day to be honest.
> 
> Not the most coming out anyone's done ever, but took me 4 years to get here. I feel better.



It may not seem like much, but I would imagine telling us is helping you to accept it for yourself.

I'm glad you feel better.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Feb 24, 2014)

Destova said:


> Sounds like that furries night out might be a good thing.



I wanna joinnnnn ;w;


----------



## DMAN14 (Feb 24, 2014)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> I wanna joinnnnn ;w;



Oh Fen, if you go itll be very yiffy ^^


----------



## Destova (Feb 24, 2014)

I'm... not seeing the issue here lol.


----------



## FenrirDarkWolf (Feb 24, 2014)

Destova said:


> I'm... not seeing the issue here lol.



When I turn 18 love.
Then there will be NO issues! ;3


----------



## Destova (Feb 24, 2014)

Haha I see.


----------



## Sweetheartz22 (Feb 24, 2014)

Jags said:


> I suppose I should finally man up and admit it
> 
> I'm bi, but learning Het. about 75/25 split, were I to put a figure to it, but it changes every day to be honest.
> 
> Not the most coming out anyone's done ever, but took me 4 years to get here. I feel better.



Glad you're feelings better, Jags


----------



## Wither (Feb 24, 2014)

Jags said:


> I suppose I should finally man up and admit it
> 
> I'm bi, but learning Het. about 75/25 split, were I to put a figure to it, but it changes every day to be honest.
> 
> Not the most coming out anyone's done ever, but took me 4 years to get here. I feel better.


Mwaha..ahHA..AHAHA...
MUUAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Seriously doe, you finally accept yourself and that's amazing <3 It's refreshing, aye?
The world is getting better with acceptance but it's still full of oppression and hate. 
 I count myself lucky to have known ya. (I've listened to way to much "(More than) Deer to me" xI)

And even after coming out you're still the manliest of Ribbon'mons :u


----------



## Migoto Da (Feb 24, 2014)

DMAN14 said:


> Oh Fen, if you go itll be very yiffy ^^





Destova said:


> I'm... not seeing the issue here lol.





FenrirDarkWolf said:


> When I turn 18 love.
> Then there will be NO issues! ;3



Psssh this thread changed quickly






Jags said:


> I suppose I should finally man up and admit it
> 
> I'm bi, but learning Het. about 75/25 split, were I to put a figure to it, but it changes every day to be honest.
> 
> Not the most coming out anyone's done ever, but took me 4 years to get here. I feel better.


That's good. Honestly, it's great to come to terms with yourself, especially if it takes that long. Makes it worth it, in my opinion.


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## Destova (Feb 24, 2014)

I blame them. All them. The yiff was NOT my idea... I think...


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## Migoto Da (Feb 24, 2014)

Har, a likely story.


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## Destova (Feb 24, 2014)

But that was not a story, t'was only facts. >.>


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Feb 24, 2014)

Destova said:


> I blame them. All them. The yiff was NOT my idea... I think...



It's not like I'd mind xD


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## Destova (Feb 24, 2014)

FenrirDarkWolf said:


> It's not like I'd mind xD



Oh myyyyyy.

Back on subject: don't be afraid to speak up. While coming out to a bunch of weirdos on the internet may sound dumb, it may just be the practice you need to be fully happy with your self and your situation. Take this as the audition. 

Also, while you may think you don't have to tell anyone, that it's not a big deal, I urge you to look inside yourself and ask if that is true. Perhaps it may really be true; I know it wasn't for me though. Keeping it bottled up, not having anyone to confide in made me fall into depression. Coming out just to my closest friend was such a huge relief. Letting my family know was even more so. Just be careful who you tell. Of course not everyone will like it. If you're in a situation that the person you tell is the only reason you have a roof over your head, and you know they might do something drastic, then I'd say it's okay not to say. Don't put your life in danger of course. But if you can and you know someone you can confide in, I can promise 90 percent of the time it will really help. And as you can see, there are plenty of us here if you need help or advice.


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## KAS3519 (Mar 1, 2014)

Kosdu said:


> It's pretty easy to tell if you are gay even if not saying it.



One of my good friends, who hadn't come out of the closet yet, asked me out. This was back before I had (I don't really know how to put this) realized I was gay.
That was awkward...

@OT

The only reason I haven't come out is because I'm unsure of what my parents reaction will be. They have always been people to stand up for gay rights, but when I told my mom that a gay guy did ask me out (as mentioned above), she stared at me with the coldest look in her eyes and said "I don't want you talking to him again." We haven't spoken since (we being me and the other guy). 
I'm sure it was out of protection for me, what was she protecting me from? I think we were only about 12 or 13 at the time, what did she think were we going to do?


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## Kitsune Cross (Mar 2, 2014)

Jags said:


> I suppose I should finally man up and admit it
> 
> I'm bi, but learning Het. about 75/25 split, were I to put a figure to it, but it changes every day to be honest.
> 
> Not the most coming out anyone's done ever, but took me 4 years to get here. I feel better.



So the fandom do actually turn everybody gay, damn, well all good to you bro!


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## Fiab (Mar 3, 2014)

Welp, My turn!

I actually first came out to a close friend of mine way back when that I was gay when we were in grade 6? 7? So about 10 or 11 years ago. Turns out she was gay herself. It was really nice having her accept it. Jump forward those 10 or 11 years. Maybe later November or early December, stayed up all-night (nothing new there for me) and at some point I randomly decided I was gonna come out about it to my mother that morning. So I waited till she got up around 6 and followed her into the kitchen while talking. Didn't rush right into it. Kind of went from 0-30, 30-50, then 50-100 about, and came right out and told her that I was gay. Big ol' grin on my face the entire time. She replied with "Really? Wish you weren't." Ended up wearing that grin the whole day.

That would have probably hurt a lot more than the small sting it was if I hadn't figured out that she kind of overloads with surprises. I kind of got a kick out of her reaction to it. Though she grabs her coffee and heads back upstairs to get ready for work. Which I had planned to tell her before she left so she could think about it when she could, but work and ignore it for the time being. Few hours later I get a hold on the friends I speak with everyday and tell them. "Oh, okay." which I figured would pretty much be their reaction. Then we proceeded to game and they let loose the gay jokes. Then one of my best friends comes online (Skype) and I tell him that I came out on being gay. He asked if I was joking and I told him nope. The best response ever. "Well good for you, now help me. My sound isn't working again." Known the dude for 14 of my 22 years and that was it. From there my mother talked to my grandparents, whom then talked to me. Then she talked to my aunt. Month later I tell my lil brother. He didn't handle it well, had the whole "why?" thing about it. Later that day he brought it up with my parents while driving somewhere. My dad didn't handle it how I expected. I had expected to be booted out as soon as he got home, but instead he just went out to a bar nearby with my older brother. 

Couple weeks later my mother is talking to the wife of my oldest brother (me being 3/4). Has me tell her myself. My mother being a woman who willingly sought religion in her upbringing and was kind of crushed by it sure was wanting me to tell the family all about it. Turns out all she was really trying to wrap her head around was the fact that she might have a son-in-law rather than another daughter-in-law.

Overall my family has been pretty accepting of it. With exception to not knowing how my dad feels about it and my lil brother flat out just said I was lying. Supposedly making me a closet straight guy (which still makes me chuckle). I've known that I was gay since I was 6 years old, so I just accepted it and never had the whole denial thing happen. Though I kept it to myself since at the time it was just easier for me to be the awkward brother than the gay one for the rest of the family. Didn't really feel scared about telling my friends/family because I had a gay friend come out several years earlier and seeing how they all responded. Really the whole reason I told was cause the sooner they knew, the sooner they'd get over it, and if they didn't, well you can't force someone to truely accept anything. That and it was really quite an obstacle blocking me.

In short, I should have come out a few years ago since once you've accepted it as part of you, not much really can hit you hard about it.

Well that's mine and I honestly did not expect it to be a wall of text. It seemed so much smaller in my head. I think this thread is rather amazing. Helps those looking to do it or had/have bad experiences with it, by supporting em


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## fonduemaster (Mar 4, 2014)

Fiab said:


> words


Shiiieeet well done, I wouldn't have no guts to do that. congrats ;D
i've never exactly understood what makes people want to come out to others despite the possible bad outcomes. Is it just like an impulse, or are you guys genuinely proud? why people take pride in that is something i dont understand, but it's not a bad thing at all. i think it's great, but it confuses me how people are happy being in a community where people are shunned, oppressed and bullied by others and sometimes even attacked. I wonder if it's like a message to the others saying "fuck you, we never gone give up!"?? maybe i'll understand when I get older...


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## Destova (Mar 4, 2014)

fonduemaster said:


> Shiiieeet well done, I wouldn't have no guts to do that. congrats ;D
> i've never exactly understood what makes people want to come out to others despite the possible bad outcomes. Is it just like an impulse, or are you guys genuinely proud? why people take pride in that is something i dont understand, but it's not a bad thing at all. i think it's great, but it confuses me how people are happy being in a community where people are shunned, oppressed and bullied by others and sometimes even attacked. I wonder if it's like a message to the others saying "fuck you, we never gone give up!"?? maybe i'll understand when I get older...



I'd ask you to read some of my more serious previous posts to find out at least partially why people do. To sum it up though, I did it because knowing that I was lying to the people I care about was gnawing away at my well being. It might seem a moot point to someone on the outside but to someone such as myself, I don't like lying. I did more then enough of that to last me two lifetimes, and lying about something so (now) trivial was just hurting myself. 

I sure don't want the hate and harassment that comes with it, but I've learned to tune it out because those people are crying over something that makes no difference in their lives, and if that's the way they want to spend their precious little time on this earth harassing me, then let them. In the meantime, I'm happy with myself and my friends and family, and I'm living life to the fullest without having to hide or lie.


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## Fiab (Mar 4, 2014)

fonduemaster said:
			
		

> Shiiieeet well done, I wouldn't have no guts to do that. congrats ;D
> i've never exactly understood what makes people want to come out to  others despite the possible bad outcomes. Is it just like an impulse, or  are you guys genuinely proud? why people take pride in that is  something i dont understand, but it's not a bad thing at all. i think  it's great, but it confuses me how people are happy being in a community  where people are shunned, oppressed and bullied by others and sometimes  even attacked. I wonder if it's like a message to the others saying  "fuck you, we never gone give up!"?? maybe i'll understand when I get  older...



Can only speculate on other people's reasons, but some good guesses would be proof for yourself that you accept it despite what others think, you want people important to you to accept it too(my opinion this should not be your reason since it's your business in the end), or you don't really care one way or another, but a mood/impulse just hits to tell someone without any real reason. My reason was just I generally don't lie to people about myself, so the people that know me actually know me.... that and I love watching people's reactions to things. Think if you accept the fact that people take time to accept things that are out of the normal for them. Especially if it overloads their circuitry. Takes time to reboot, then you wait for everything to load, then background processes still seem to slow something down, then it's normal again.... Sorry, bad ceiling fan-computer memory.

As well, your tl;dr version of my post... you sir, are amazing. I can not believe I did not think of doing that. I now know why it seemed shorter in my head. :grin:


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## Distorted (Mar 4, 2014)

It was also a matter of lying and hiding how I really ways as well. It bothered me about not being honest to my family since we were pretty close. My mother was especially hurt that I didn't talk to her anymore. She said that if there was anything bothering me that I could tell her and nothing I said or did would make her stop loving me.So under some false sense of security I confided in her and came out. She...did not take it very well. And after all the yelling and arguing, she just kinda pretended that I didn't say it. I honestly think she doesn't care about me anymore. So long as I don't partake in that "lifestyle", then everything is fine.

I did tell some of my close friends, because I wanted to let them know who I really was, and I was tired of being asked about girls all the time. They took it a hell of a lot better than my family. Some of them even knew it before I even told them. It really did make me feel like I wasn't messed like my folks thoughts. I understand that it's not that big of a deal to most folks, but it meant the world to me that such a simple thing didn't change how my friends felt about me.


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## KAS3519 (Mar 4, 2014)

To all those of you who have come out, here's a question: When do I go about doing it?
Should I just say it over dinner sometime, or wait until it relates to the conversation?


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## Destova (Mar 4, 2014)

KAS3519 said:


> To all those of you who have come out, here's a question: When do I go about doing it?
> Should I just say it over dinner sometime, or wait until it relates to the conversation?



Honestly that really is not something we can answer with any certainty. I told my first friend late one night over Yahoo Messenger. The next one, on my way to take him home from staying over at my place. I told my family after my mom figured it out and proved to me the rest of my family wouldn't care. 

You can't pinpoint when or how to do it; it just happens. Least for me it did.


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## Distorted (Mar 4, 2014)

KAS3519 said:


> To all those of you who have come out, here's a question: When do I go about doing it?
> Should I just say it over dinner sometime, or wait until it relates to the conversation?



Can't really say for sure. I'm sure your folks aren't like mine. My mother was asking had I met anyone and I told her then. And I also told my mother on a weekend so she could have time to take it in, but the whole ordeal lasted for the entire month and then some. Just know what you're getting into when and if you decide to say it. Make sure they're not next to stairs or items that you use to throw. Heheh heh....I sure wish I was joking.


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## Fiab (Mar 4, 2014)

KAS3519 said:
			
		

> To all those of you who have come out, here's a question: When do I go about doing it?
> Should I just say it over dinner sometime, or wait until it relates to the conversation?



It's really your judgement call on that one just gotta make sure you're ready for some attention about it.  Though I think it'd probably be less favorable to kind of just blurt it out to a group of people over telling people slowly, my personal opinion though. Course there is also the option of hinting at it until someone asks you if you are this or that. Then you just have to say yes or no to decide whether or not you're ready for peoples to know.


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## kumiko (Mar 4, 2014)

Man this is such a personal topic for me, but I'm willing to share. You guys have some great stories about it, I mean that in a sorta good and bad way. some of the situations are inspiring, some of them are just harsh you know? 
Here's mine...*deep breath*


Since around when I was 6, I knew there was something different about me...couldn't exactly pinpoint it because I didn't have a concept of "gay". It was only until about middle school that I learned what the concept was...but the school I was going to at the time was absolutely awful. I wasn't out yet at the time, nor did I want to. I was constantly harassed with the harshest things you could think of, and went through constant bullying over the subject that everyone suspected I was gay. They didn't even know for sure, and they did this type of stuff, so I tried hiding it and denying it. I felt like there had to be some way rid myself of it. But I soon learned that no matter how hard I tried, there was not. This drove me into a pretty deep depression and I did some things I'm not proud of. 
I had some sort of mindset change though one day, I just decided to pull myself away from all of that nonsense. So I was online schooled for a couple years. Eventually I came across this highschool that was focused on people like me, kinda different and artistic. I decided to go there my freshman year (only 150 kids total). 
As soon as I got there, I was a bit intimidated by all of the various people. Everyone was so unique and just...cool. All I had been exposed to was bland students with no sense of originality. 
From then on, I made some friends (many of which were lgbt) and realized that being gay isnt a bad thing or anything I should be ashamed of at all! So slowly I started to appreciate life more and find myself. I decided to tell my friends that I was gay. Nobody treated me any different, they were supportive and loving and it was great! My family on the other hand was tough, they're sorta not okay with things like that so I tried warming them up to it by telling them I was bisexual (which I definitely wasn't). They took it a bit odd at first, I guess they thought I was being influenced by something. But soon I just flat out told them I was gay and though it was awkward for about a week, we joke about it all the time and they have learned to accept it. I feel like the happiest person alive since coming out and finding who I was and deciding what I want to do with my life. 

Advice to anyone who needs help coming out: Surround yourself with people who care about you and accept you. Once you do that, it'll build your self esteem a lot and you'll discover who you really are and be happy with it. Then you can move on to tell your friends, parents, etc. Dont act like its a negative thing, though each person may take it differently than the last. Try and let them know that you're telling them this because you feel like you can trust them and let them know that you're happy with who you are. It may be awkward or rocky for a good week to a month but it will work itself out and you'll be glad you did it. 

*love to all of you out there*


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## Kosdu (Mar 4, 2014)

@Kumiko

Love to you too, I'm just now recovering from that pain.

I suppose on the other hand it helped me be tough when I need to, I'm the kinda guy who'd walk with a broken leg as far as he needs to if he needed to.


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Mar 5, 2014)

I've never actually, technically came out to any of my family but my grandmother, before she passed away. Then she told everyone else. But, I feel like I should tell them, even though they already know.

Any ideas on what I should do? It's just... very awkward for me there, cause, they don't mind it, but they make a lot of gay jokes and all and apparently still want me to be with a woman, but like, it's just awkward I guess...


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## Fiab (Mar 5, 2014)

FenrirDarkWolf said:
			
		

> Any ideas on what I should do? It's just... very awkward for me there,  cause, they don't mind it, but they make a lot of gay jokes and all and  apparently still want me to be with a woman, but like, it's just awkward  I guess...



Ah gay jokes aren't all bad, just if they're  meant to be intentionally mean. As for the find a woman thing. My mother  who accepts it all together accidentally let something like that slip  not too long ago. This is how it went.

"You better make sure for your sake you find a woman who can cook."

"Nope, gay"

"Find a guy who can cook then."

"I can cook just fine"

"I don't know about that."

/end

They ain't that big of a deal in the end if you're happy about things :grin:


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## TheRH100 (Mar 5, 2014)

Even though at my school everyone likes to act like total badasses, I came out a few months ago as a bisexual (maybe I'm pan, idk) and nobody really actually cared. I actually really would rather people not care then to sit there and buly me because of it, so that's cool what happened. Maybe it's the fact that I am bi, so technically I still dig a straight relationship and people don't care much?


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## Destova (Mar 5, 2014)

TheRH100 said:


> Even though at my school everyone likes to act like total badasses, I came out a few months ago as a bisexual (maybe I'm pan, idk) and nobody really actually cared. I actually really would rather people not care then to sit there and buly me because of it, so that's cool what happened. Maybe it's the fact that I am bi, so technically I still dig a straight relationship and people don't care much?



I've noticed in my experience with folks who claim to be bi that they don't get near the attention in general that gay and lesbian folks do. I've observed quite a few through my time in high school and I think that's just kinda how it works in the end. I don't know how, or why or how it makes sense, but it's what I've seen myself. I mostly heard about the bi ones directly from themselves, whereas news of a new gay or lesbian person spread like wildfire through my high school. 

Kids are strange, to be sure. xD



Fiab said:


> Ah gay jokes aren't all bad, just if they're meant to be intentionally mean. As for the find a woman thing. My mother who accepts it all together accidentally let something like that slip not too long ago. This is how it went.
> 
> "You better make sure for your sake you find a woman who can cook."
> 
> ...



Wow. That is, literally, as easy as it gets. I mean, I guess it's as easy as someone just figuring it out lol.


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## KAS3519 (Mar 5, 2014)

I'm making this so much harder than it should be...
Here I am, about to come out to my family, and then LOL NOPE SOCIAL ANXIETY FOR YOU
I have absolutely no idea how to say it. I don't know if I should be blunt about it and just say "I'm gay," and I don't exactly know how to make "subtle hints" that seems to think is the best way to do it.
The way I was planning to do it was to just wait until it's somewhat relative to the topic that we're conversing about, but that's taking longer than I would like.

If anything, it should be slightly easier for me, because my sister is pretty popular at school. When I do come out, it's going to spread like wildfire to practically everyone. So, I should only have to come out to my family and my only online friend who doesn't know yet.

I'm normally fairly good at planning things out, but I'm drawing a blank here. Any suggestions or tips?


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## Kosdu (Mar 5, 2014)

KAS3519 said:


> I'm making this so much harder than it should be...
> Here I am, about to come out to my family, and then LOL NOPE SOCIAL ANXIETY FOR YOU
> I have absolutely no idea how to say it. I don't know if I should be blunt about it and just say "I'm gay," and I don't exactly know how to make "subtle hints" that seems to think is the best way to do it.
> The way I was planning to do it was to just wait until it's somewhat relative to the topic that we're conversing about, but that's taking longer than I would like.
> ...



Calmy run it through your head.

Or just say "I'm gay" and leave the room.

If you can't, text them and let them come. Chances are they know.


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## Spatel (Mar 11, 2014)

TheRH100 said:


> Even though at my school everyone likes to act like total badasses, I came out a few months ago as a bisexual (maybe I'm pan, idk) and nobody really actually cared. I actually really would rather people not care then to sit there and buly me because of it, so that's cool what happened. Maybe it's the fact that I am bi, so technically I still dig a straight relationship and people don't care much?



Eh.... there's some stigma, definitely. Just check out DataLounge or something, and you'll find a whole lot of gay folks who absolutely hate bisexuals.

Among the straight population it tends to mostly be homophobia coupled with a refusal to acknowledge bisexuals as anything other than closeted gays. The 'one-drop' rule so to speak. You'll notice it sooner or later when someone refuses to date you over it (probably sooner).


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## Mullerornis (Mar 16, 2014)

Kosdu said:


> Calmy run it through your head.
> 
> Or just say "I'm gay" and leave the room.
> 
> If you can't, text them and let them come. Chances are they know.




But seriously think if the latter is worth it. Sometimes waiting for a response will only cause more anxiety.


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## LupusLuciferus (Mar 16, 2014)

KAS3519 said:


> I'm making this so much harder than it should be...
> Here I am, about to come out to my family, and then LOL NOPE SOCIAL ANXIETY FOR YOU
> I have absolutely no idea how to say it. I don't know if I should be blunt about it and just say "I'm gay," and I don't exactly know how to make "subtle hints" that seems to think is the best way to do it.
> The way I was planning to do it was to just wait until it's somewhat relative to the topic that we're conversing about, but that's taking longer than I would like.
> ...



I grew up in a homophobic neighborhood, went to a homophobic school, and was surrounded by homophobic relatives. I was terrified to come out. There were times that I felt like committing suicide would be better and easier than coming out. I was an outcast at school, the only time anyone ever conversed with me was when they messaged me on MySpace telling me to kill myself. I thought that coming out would make things worse. I thought I was going to get thrown out of my house. I was an absolute mess and my anxiety was killing me, but there was a part of that was growing very tired of living in fear. Once I gathered up the courage to finally come out, my confidence shot through the roof. Things didn't bother me as much as they used to. My anxiety disappeared. My parents learned to deal with it, and I cut off communication with the family members that didn't approve. Most importantly, I found that meeting similar people that share similar interests and experiences became so much easier. Coming out was the best decision I've ever made. It gets better, and you seem like a very intelligent person with enough coping skills to get through this. Just know that we've been through it and we're here for you.


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## RabidLynx (Apr 3, 2014)

this post means nothing now.


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 3, 2014)

Speaking of coming out, people have been asking me if I'm gay at school, and I'm just like, yes.

Like, in 5th period Monday, I was about to leave, and this girl called me, and she was like, "Are you gay?" and I said yes, and walked out.

Then on Tuesday, I was helping a friend with her music, and she asked me that too, and I'm like, yes, and she was just like, "ok", cause she heard it and didn't know.

Yesterday, I was helping a friend in Algebra, and then she asked me the same question, and I was like, yeah. And she was like, "That's cool." and stuffs


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## Jess2449 (Apr 9, 2014)

It was pretty easy for me to come out as gay in my school. All you need to do is give subtle hints about it, act a little gay/girly, make gay jokes, call some other gay or call him a she and as long as you don't directly answer the question you are in a good position to see people's reaction to someone being gay. If some reactions are bad then you can just deny it directly and say that you were simply being funny. Else after they keep pressuring you to give them a clear answer you can tell it to them since they are used in the idea of you probably being gay and won't have an issue.


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## RabidLynx (Apr 10, 2014)

Yeah, I'm bi. But does it matter? There's really nobody I want to date (at the moment), and trying to convince my parents that it's not just a phase and it's not a choice is like talking to a wall. There's no point because they're not going to change their minds. Not only that, my school is extremely homophobic and the news of me being bi would spread like wildfire, and I would probably be bashed for the rest of my school years by pretty much everyone. And since I'm most likely not going to date anyone while I'm in school, is it really that important that people know I'm bi? I don't think so. It's already taking a lot of courage to say this right now, and not because I think you guys will hate me or anything. It's taking a lot of courage to do this because this is the Internet and ANYBODY can see this, so who knows who will see this. Not only that, my parents are the type who like to know every single thing I'm doing. So they've probably somehow found out I go here, and they're probably reading this. And yep, probably when I get back to dad's house we'll have a nice little talk about how homosexuality is an abomination and that I'm too young to be thinking about this and how it's all a phase.

Ok. Sure. If that happens, fine. I don't care. Dad is going to have to accept that I'm not going to turn out to be his little christian republican clone that hates liberals. If it makes him happy, fine, I am NOT bisexual. But he can't change what I think and feel.

I have also accepted that I am gender-fluid. This describes me perfectly, some days I wake up feeling masculine and other days feminine. I don't let my biological sex get in the way of who I am, in fact I just would like to forget about that. Because to me, what's in between my legs are not important (except for which bathroom you go to). I've never mentioned my actual sex simply because to me it is non-existent. And I like it that way. 

If you couldn't tell I've been thinking a lot about these kinds of things, and I now realize that these things about me that I've known all these years actually have names. I know who I am now, and I'm glad, this kind of crap has been on my mind for a while now and it's great to get it off my chest. But like I said, does it really matter if the people around me know? If somebody asks then I'll be honest, and if my parents somehow find out I will have to deal with it, but right now they don't know, so why bring it up if you know it's going to bring a crapstorm of drama? So yeah, that's why I haven't "come out" yet...

god I feel like a wuss


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## Llamapotamus (Apr 13, 2014)

RabidLynx said:


> *Yeah, I'm bi. But does it matter? There's really nobody I want to date (at the moment)*, and trying to convince my parents that it's not just a phase and it's not a choice is like talking to a wall. There's no point because they're not going to change their minds. Not only that, my school is extremely homophobic and the news of me being bi would spread like wildfire, and I would probably be bashed for the rest of my school years by pretty much everyone. And since I'm most likely not going to date anyone while I'm in school, is it really that important that people know I'm bi? I don't think so. It's already taking a lot of courage to say this right now, and not because I think you guys will hate me or anything. It's taking a lot of courage to do this because this is the Internet and ANYBODY can see this, so who knows who will see this. Not only that, my parents are the type who like to know every single thing I'm doing. So they've probably somehow found out I go here, and they're probably reading this. And yep, probably when I get back to dad's house we'll have a nice little talk about how homosexuality is an abomination and that I'm too young to be thinking about this and how it's all a phase.
> 
> Ok. Sure. If that happens, fine. I don't care. Dad is going to have to accept that I'm not going to turn out to be his little christian republican clone that hates liberals. If it makes him happy, fine, I am NOT bisexual. But he can't change what I think and feel.
> 
> ...



Bolded the parts that I agree with and are relevant in my case. Sometimes I feel like I'm doing this all wrong and I should tell someone. But I'm only a 1.5 on the Kinsey scale, so it's not like chances are high that I would need to come out any time soon. People just naturally assume I'm straight anyway because I usually behave heteronormatively. 

Every so often, though.......................


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## tehwereferret (Apr 14, 2014)

I think even though I told my parents long ago I am Bisexual, they probably still think it was just a phase at the time. Years later, after a failed marriage and multiple boyfriends, they probably believe I am straight. Of course, if they were to look through most of my profiles, it lists that I am attracted to both equally. 

I never had a problem in school, as I never told anyone outside of my friends and the few females I had a crush on. Nowadays, as an adult, and todays trends have made it so much easier to just passively attract both.


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## Mr. Jumps (Apr 23, 2014)

Hello, figured I should share, after all I didn't just spend a few week mornings sipping tea and reading yo not get my word in. 


       My story begins when I was 15, I had been moved to the Knoxville the year before. Not having any friends or not being able too. ( school was out for summer ) I was bored and lonely, parents were never around. When the were they would ignore me. I start school, I go through the whole year struggling to adjust to my new school teachers and such. Made no friends. Mid that summer I met a guy by the name of Zero on the internet, he was a local furry skype mod. I started making friends through skype... I ended up making friends at school who were also furs. Now this is where shit hits the fan. All these new friends I were meeting were gay. Being raised in a very strict Baptist family I knew my dad would be angry but... It felt right, I didn't mind a guy hitting on me... I turn 16, I was asked by one of my friends if I would like to try "dating" with him. So like any other curious teenager I said sure. Ended up in a abusive relations with him, he ended up punching me in the mouth after we start fighting. A few months later after a few million cals in chocolates and foods I was starting to fee better. Was making Bs and Cs in school ( great for me ) and had built a great relationship with my dad. About 10 months ago I dated a guy online for 6 months, ended up breaking up with him over personal reasons. That night I was very depressed and confused, I went to school the next day and told my best friend I was gay and decked straight in the mouth. I never saw it coming, someone I knew for a while and we shared everything together. Went to consulting that afternoon, and write a letter to my mum, explaining how my life has been barrel rolling in a massive corkscrew of fab. I came out the closet that afternoon to Just my mum. She was like " Knew that " she begged to tell dad. I felt skeptical at first, should of said no. Finally agreed that afternoon, she told him and he was totally ok with it. Or I though, recently he gives me super amounts of crap for being girly. I was always girly, like almost everyone I have told said they knew I was gay. It just kills me every time he says something to me, its always negative. What kills me even more is he has ( I have no proof ) but its seems my brother has started hating me... Im sorry I wrote so much. Cheers!


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## Benji (Apr 23, 2014)

Mr. Jumps said:


> Hello, figured I should share, after all I didn't just spend a few week mornings sipping tea and reading yo not get my word in.
> 
> 
> My story begins when I was 15, I had been moved to the Knoxville the year before. Not having any friends or not being able too. ( school was out for summer ) I was bored and lonely, parents were never around. When the were they would ignore me. I start school, I go through the whole year struggling to adjust to my new school teachers and such. Made no friends. Mid that summer I met a guy by the name of Zero on the internet, he was a local furry skype mod. I started making friends through skype... I ended up making friends at school who were also furs. Now this is where shit hits the fan. All these new friends I were meeting were gay. Being raised in a very strict Baptist family I knew my dad would be angry but... It felt right, I didn't mind a guy hitting on me... I turn 16, I was asked by one of my friends if I would like to try "dating" with him. So like any other curious teenager I said sure. Ended up in a abusive relations with him, he ended up punching me in the mouth after we start fighting. A few months later after a few million cals in chocolates and foods I was starting to fee better. Was making Bs and Cs in school ( great for me ) and had built a great relationship with my dad. About 10 months ago I dated a guy online for 6 months, ended up breaking up with him over personal reasons. That night I was very depressed and confused, I went to school the next day and told my best friend I was gay and decked straight in the mouth. I never saw it coming, someone I knew for a while and we shared everything together. Went to consulting that afternoon, and write a letter to my mum, explaining how my life has been barrel rolling in a massive corkscrew of fab. I came out the closet that afternoon to Just my mum. She was like " Knew that " she begged to tell dad. I felt skeptical at first, should of said no. Finally agreed that afternoon, she told him and he was totally ok with it. Or I though, recently he gives me super amounts of crap for being girly. I was always girly, like almost everyone I have told said they knew I was gay. It just kills me every time he says something to me, its always negative. What kills me even more is he has ( I have no proof ) but its seems my brother has started hating me... Im sorry I wrote so much. Cheers!



Let it out!  No apologies!  Eventually you'll be in a social setting where physical violence over stuff like this is unheard of and Dad's opinions don't matter.



RabidLynx said:


> Yeah, I'm bi. But does it matter? There's really nobody I want to date (at the moment), and trying to convince my parents that it's not just a phase and it's not a choice is like talking to a wall. There's no point because they're not going to change their minds. Not only that, my school is extremely homophobic and the news of me being bi would spread like wildfire, and I would probably be bashed for the rest of my school years by pretty much everyone. And since I'm most likely not going to date anyone while I'm in school, is it really that important that people know I'm bi? I don't think so. It's already taking a lot of courage to say this right now, and not because I think you guys will hate me or anything. It's taking a lot of courage to do this because this is the Internet and ANYBODY can see this, so who knows who will see this. Not only that, my parents are the type who like to know every single thing I'm doing. So they've probably somehow found out I go here, and they're probably reading this. And yep, probably when I get back to dad's house we'll have a nice little talk about how homosexuality is an abomination and that I'm too young to be thinking about this and how it's all a phase.
> 
> Ok. Sure. If that happens, fine. I don't care. Dad is going to have to accept that I'm not going to turn out to be his little christian republican clone that hates liberals. If it makes him happy, fine, I am NOT bisexual. But he can't change what I think and feel.
> 
> ...



You're not a wuss.  Everyone has a different timeline for coming out, especially as a bi gender-fluid individual.  That's a lot--and taking your time to share that with people isn't a bad idea.

The more you think about these things, the more grounded you will feel when you finally decide to tell people.  If you have that inner peace, whatever they say won't really matter at all!


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## NekoXboy (Apr 25, 2014)

Mr. Jumps said:


> Hello, figured I should share, after all I didn't just spend a few week mornings sipping tea and reading yo not get my word in.
> 
> 
> My story begins when I was 15, I had been moved to the Knoxville the year before. Not having any friends or not being able too. ( school was out for summer ) I was bored and lonely, parents were never around. When the were they would ignore me. I start school, I go through the whole year struggling to adjust to my new school teachers and such. Made no friends. Mid that summer I met a guy by the name of Zero on the internet, he was a local furry skype mod. I started making friends through skype... I ended up making friends at school who were also furs. Now this is where shit hits the fan. All these new friends I were meeting were gay. Being raised in a very strict Baptist family I knew my dad would be angry but... It felt right, I didn't mind a guy hitting on me... I turn 16, I was asked by one of my friends if I would like to try "dating" with him. So like any other curious teenager I said sure. Ended up in a abusive relations with him, he ended up punching me in the mouth after we start fighting. A few months later after a few million cals in chocolates and foods I was starting to fee better. Was making Bs and Cs in school ( great for me ) and had built a great relationship with my dad. About 10 months ago I dated a guy online for 6 months, ended up breaking up with him over personal reasons. That night I was very depressed and confused, I went to school the next day and told my best friend I was gay and decked straight in the mouth. I never saw it coming, someone I knew for a while and we shared everything together. Went to consulting that afternoon, and write a letter to my mum, explaining how my life has been barrel rolling in a massive corkscrew of fab. I came out the closet that afternoon to Just my mum. She was like " Knew that " she begged to tell dad. I felt skeptical at first, should of said no. Finally agreed that afternoon, she told him and he was totally ok with it. Or I though, recently he gives me super amounts of crap for being girly. I was always girly, like almost everyone I have told said they knew I was gay. It just kills me every time he says something to me, its always negative. What kills me even more is he has ( I have no proof ) but its seems my brother has started hating me... Im sorry I wrote so much. Cheers!



that sucks, i'm sorry your "best friend" was such an asshole. people like that are usually unintelligent and aren't worth your time. if he would punch you in the face for something you can't control, then he's got some serious problems. when it comes to your dad,  if he makes you feel bad about yourself and doesn't want you to be you, then he's the one with the problem. don't let other people tell you how you should and shouldn't act. it's your life, so fuck anybody who want's to control how you live.

Tennessee must be tough though, being a sexually confused teenager is a bit easier up here in new york XD.


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## Lycan7793 (Apr 27, 2014)

Hey, my name is Lycan. I recently came out to my mom a few weeks ago, and now I'm trying to take the next steps to come out to the rest of my family. It went well with my mom, but she's afraid my dad will take it badly--maybe even leave us. I need to come out to my sister yet, as well as my father. Any thoughts, comments, tips, or ideas would be well appreciated. Thanks!


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 27, 2014)

Lycan7793 said:


> Hey, my name is Lycan. I recently came out to my mom a few weeks ago, and now I'm trying to take the next steps to come out to the rest of my family. It went well with my mom, but she's afraid my dad will take it badly--maybe even leave us. I need to come out to my sister yet, as well as my father. Any thoughts, comments, tips, or ideas would be well appreciated. Thanks!



Why would your father leave, exactly?


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## Lycantwinkboy (Apr 27, 2014)

Because he can't handle it, or won't want to, or will blame my mom for not telling him sooner. Sorry, had to make a new account.


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Apr 28, 2014)

Lycantwinkboy said:


> Because he can't handle it, or won't want to, or will blame my mom for not telling him sooner. Sorry, had to make a new account.



I see...


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## Icky (Apr 28, 2014)

Lycan7793 said:


> Hey, my name is Lycan. I recently came out to my mom a few weeks ago, and now I'm trying to take the next steps to come out to the rest of my family. It went well with my mom, but she's afraid my dad will take it badly--maybe even leave us. I need to come out to my sister yet, as well as my father. Any thoughts, comments, tips, or ideas would be well appreciated. Thanks!



If you think there's going to be a problem with your father, why bother telling him at all? Unless you've got a boy to bring home, anyway, there's not really much to be gained.

(Also, you probably shouldn't have made another account.)


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## RabidLynx (May 1, 2014)

I was about to come out to a friend at school...

then, one of my other friends tells a secret to another "friend" (not about sexuality but still pretty personal). that "friend" decides to tell everybody, and now some other "friends" are ignoring that friend, and today they had a "polite discussion" about how they don't want to be friends with that person because of that secret. And now, drama is happening.

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE *runs back into closet*


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## Llamapotamus (May 1, 2014)

RabidLynx said:


> I was about to come out to a friend at school...
> 
> then, one of my other friends tells a secret to another "friend" (not about sexuality but still pretty personal). that "friend" decides to tell everybody, and now some other "friends" are ignoring that friend, and today they had a "polite discussion" about how they don't want to be friends with that person because of that secret. And now, drama is happening.
> 
> NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE *runs back into closet*



Man, you dodged a bullet there...so much for trustworthy friends.


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## DeCatt (May 2, 2014)

People at skool:
"DeCatt are you a faggot or something?"
"Yes"
"Oh ok"
Not sure if they know. Probably do

Female family members:
"Oh (insert attractive character here) is such a hot guy"
"Yes he is"
"Oh DeCatt you so funny"
Not sure if they know. Probably do

Good old mate:
(Tries to jump on computer, I intercept and close tabs)
"Lol why did you have on there, gay porn?"
"Yes"
"Oh DeCatt you so funny"
Not sure if they know. Probably do

Cute single gay guy I really dig:
"Hi DeCatt"
"Hi guy"
"I wish I had a boyfriend"
"cough"
"Oh well, got to keep looking"
"COUGH"
Thinks I'm straight

Those are my adventures in gay


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## Icky (May 2, 2014)

DeCatt said:


> Female family members:
> "Oh (insert attractive character here) is such a hot guy"
> "Yes he is"
> "Oh DeCatt you so funny"
> Not sure if they know. Probably do



This is the bane of my existence. Every time I try to bring it up*, it gets laughed away as a joke.
*I'm only really worried about telling people like my roommate next semester, in case he has an issue with it now.


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## Butters Shikkon (May 2, 2014)

DeCatt said:


> People at skool:
> "DeCatt are you a faggot or something?"
> "Yes"
> "Oh ok"
> ...



Fix'ed the last part for what you should have done. 

You know, I must say when I first found out I was gay I sorta approached the topic much as you did. Of course I sorta have a faggy air about me anyway so no one really is *that* surprised.


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## Jags (May 2, 2014)

I decided to tell everyone in my lfie I was bisexual, just to get it out the way and over with. As I said, 'It's no big deal, just figured it'd be nice for you to know'. Geneeral 'We guessed' and apathy were what I got, so I'm pretty pleased. Only one person isn't happy and that's my boss, who's massivly homophobic. He was already a dick though, so I'm not overly bothered.


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## Butters Shikkon (May 2, 2014)

Jags said:


> I decided to tell everyone in my lfie I was bisexual, just to get it out the way and over with. As I said, 'It's no big deal, just figured it'd be nice for you to know'. Geneeral 'We guessed' and apathy were what I got, so I'm pretty pleased. Only one person isn't happy and that's my boss, who's massivly homophobic. He was already a dick though, so I'm not overly bothered.



The one person I must admit I would not like knowing my sexuality is my boss. Too much power. 

I do hope he won't treat you any different.


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## Sweetheartz22 (May 2, 2014)

Not gonna lie. My husband was in denial that I was bi ever since we dated. Even after telling him for years, he still thought I was as straight as an arrow because I married a man. Obviously, I'm *supposed* to be straight if I married a guy with a dick....what the hell was *I* thinking??? ;V
 But, that was resolved when I took out one of his porno magazines and started pointing out which girls were hot and why in vivid detail. So yeah, you could say he gets the idea now.


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## Jags (May 2, 2014)

Sweetheartz22 said:


> But, that was resolved when I took out one of his porno magazines and started pointing out which girls were hot and why in vivid detail. So yeah, you could say he gets the idea now.



That must have been the best half an hour of his life.


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## Sweetheartz22 (May 2, 2014)

Jags said:


> That must have been the best half an hour of his life.



That times two. After I did that, he literally ran to his man cave and brought out the rest of his secret stash like it was Christmas morning lol Curse him for abusing my powers of bisexuality against me!!! Although, I'm not complaining because who *doesn't* like being surprised by free porno? Not this girl, I can tell you that much! ;3


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## RabidLynx (May 2, 2014)

Llamapotamus said:


> Man, you dodged a bullet there...so much for trustworthy friends.



Yep, these are the kind of people I hang with everyday. Why I don't know, but they certainly aren't helping my self-esteem, especially since one of them is extremely biphobic.



			
				DeCatt said:
			
		

> "DeCatt are you a faggot or something?"
> "Yes"
> "Oh ok"
> Not sure if they know. Probably do
> ...



I KNOW THESE FEELS SO MUCH

People at my school have always kinda wondered if I was gay. Most of the time jokingly, but I've actually had some rumors spread around before. And this is when I thought I was straight, so I wasn't too happy about that. But now that I know I'm bi, nobody seems to care anymore. Sometimes I've said someone of the same sex is hot, and people laughed, but I'm pretty sure they thought I was joking. Most of the time when somebody asks about my sexuality, it goes like this:

Person: Hey are you gay?
RabidLynx: No... I'm bisexual 
laughter

One time it went like this-

Person: Are you gay?
RabidLynx: No... I'm bi 
Person: Hahahahaha... wait, are you really?
RabidLynx: Uh, n-no! Just joking...
RabidLynx (in my mind): GOD DAMNIT


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## DeCatt (May 3, 2014)

RabidLynx said:


> Yep, these are the kind of people I hang with everyday. Why I don't know, but they certainly aren't helping my self-esteem, especially since one of them is extremely biphobic.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Yeah I can empathize with that

Ah fuck it, decided to ask him out.
LEEEEROY JEEEEENKIIIIINS


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## Shay Feral (May 8, 2014)

My "coming out" was less than stellar, and not fraught with drama. However, copious amounts of alcohol were involved in all but one instance of confession, so I'm not exactly sure who all actually believes, or remembers anything. I have a couple gay friends I told when sober...

But people like my father, brother, and straight/nonfurry friends that I have told, I was skunked on whiskey. Alot of people say they forget things when they're drunk, but I remember alot... So... yeah... Either way, I don't catch shit, so I'm okay! lol


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## sage-tanuki (May 21, 2014)

I have no idea how I'll come out to my family. I'm waiting until I leave home for sure. I mean, I act and look like a classic lesbian and I'm pretty sure they basically know but I still hear homophobic (really horrible) comments from both parents on almost a daily basis.
I originally thought I was pansexual but I wouldnt say that now, because 90+% of the time I like girls. Just gonna wait until I'm basically going to marry a girl to tell them, because if by some miracle I end up with a guy they never have to know. Hahaha.

I just would never know how to breach the subject to them.
Congratulations to everyone who came out here, it's really scary.


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## litchi (May 23, 2014)

Coming out wasn't terrible for me. I live in a liberal part of the USA and my parents are fairly liberal. There occasionally a homophobic comment they make (not realizing it's homophobic) I get a bit upset over, but it's alright most of the time. I came out as bisexual at first, but realized I like 99% girls, ahah. 

Coming out as trans was a different story. They refuse to use my preferred name and pronouns, ugh.


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## RabidLynx (May 23, 2014)

Haven't told anybody I'm bi yet, don't think I will anytime soon. Wonder if I should tell anyone I'm gender-fluid. Most people assume I'm cisgender, which I don't mind, so I think it's best if I keep it to myself.

I think there may be another gender-fluid kid at my school. I don't know their name, and I've never talked to them before, but I noticed them a few weeks ago and I've just been kinda watching them (I know it's creepy but I'm just curious bro). They have a male body and a male voice, but I've seen them dressed in feminine clothing and colors. Which could mean they're trans. But I've also seen them in male/unisex clothing, and their hair is boyish. I'm not quite sure, but so far I've just assumed they're gender-fluid. If they are, that would be so cool. That would mean I wouldn't be the only one of my school and I could have a friend that would understand how I feel. and plus they're kinda cute

[e] I'm not sure if this is the right thread for this, but since it's about sexuality I'll give it a shot. 

I have a theory. I think there may be more bi people than we think, and a lot of people who are actually bi think they're straight or gay. This is because a person knows they are attracted to one gender, so they just kinda assume they only like that gender. So when they look for love or sex or whatever, they turn to the gender they know for sure they like, and they don't even look at the other gender. They just see the other gender as friends, because they don't consider being in a relationship or having sex with the other gender. I thought I was straight, until I started considering sex and relationships with the other gender. That is how I found out I was bi. I think if more people started to think about the other gender, they might find they are bi. If they aren't, that's fine, but I think there may be more bisexuals than we think because they don't even consider the other gender. Just a theory.


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## Nekokami (May 31, 2014)

I'm unsure about my sexuality. I mostly like girls, but sometimes I'm attracted to my own sex...
I might be bi.


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## WolfNightV4X1 (Jun 27, 2014)

So I guess the thread topic has moved from 'furryism isn't a thing you come out about' to talking about actually coming out...

Sure I'll join.

So...I think I may be a trans boy...nothing too much like getting a sex change.

I mostly see myself as male, and I'd like to be referred as such, at least online. Real life may be too much, and my family will be major 'wtf, no homos in dis house'.

I'd LIKE to have typical male anatomy, but I'd rather have been born and raised as such rather than making the huge switch, especially, like I said, with my family being the way they are. Plus...I don't know if I'd want to go that far anyways. If I could magically change male at will then back and forth hell yeah I would.

So for the most part I'll stick to thinking of myself as male, dressing like a typical male (hate dresses and colorful lacy clothes and stuff, I wear t-shirts and jeans all the time). At most, I might use male pronouns and maybe act a little more masculine. 

I'm kinda wondering if I ever decide to be a trans boy if that makes me gay? :3 That sounds fun...minus the double the fun parts, but oh well. Meh, anyways, for the time being I'm sticking to 'boyish girl'...because it's like the socially acceptable version of trans boy.

.....meeeh, anyways, I wanted to get this thing off my chest so glad this thing kinda exists for me to write stuff on.

WNV4X1 out!



KAS3519 said:


> I'm normally fairly good at planning things out, but I'm drawing a blank here. Any suggestions or tips?



*cue humorous answer you can ignore if it's insensitive because I  was virtually serious a second ago and need to make a humorous response*

Step 1) Call your family into room
Step 2) Hide in closet
Step 3) Come out of closet
Step 4) Say "Swiggity Sway, I'm gay!!!~~~
Step 5) *-*`*~***~Run away*~**~*~**


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## fonduemaster (Jun 28, 2014)

WolfNightV4X1 said:


> I'm kinda wondering if I ever decide to be a trans boy if that makes me gay?


keep in mind that gender identity =/= sexual orientation


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## RabidLynx (Jun 28, 2014)

WolfNightV4X1 said:


> I'd LIKE to have typical male anatomy, but I'd rather have been born and raised as such rather than making the huge switch, especially, like I said, with my family being the way they are. Plus...I don't know if I'd want to go that far anyways. If I could magically change male at will then back and forth hell yeah I would.



This... just, this. This is EXACTLY how I feel.
If I could have to power to change my sex whenever I wanted, I would be happy forever. But I wouldn't want to go out and get a sex change.

Of course, this isn't really a huge pressing issue on my life. Sometimes I am comfortable with my body, sometimes I'm not. And sometimes, I just don't give a shit. I just want to be a person.


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## Saga (Jul 2, 2014)

WolfNightV4X1 said:


> Step 1) Call your family into room
> Step 2) Hide in closet
> Step 3) Come out of closet
> Step 4) Say "Swiggity Sway, I'm gay!!!~~~
> Step 5) *-*`*~***~Run away*~**~*~**


I actually did this corny shit, but to a friend.

I was at his house and I just went into his closet when he was in the bathroom, and when he came back I called for him. When he asked why I was in his closet I just walked out, and then back in, and out again. 
He looked at me puzzled and I just said I was gay, and it was alright and all.


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## quai (Jul 2, 2014)

My story is much the same as many I've read on here already. Small hick town, not a looker in the bunch, feeling like I just dropped my ass in from Mars. High school didn't bother me all that much. By Senior year almost everyone suspected or knew, and I knew I didn't care. I'd had a couple boyfriends by the time I was eighteen, one real in fact! (go me, right?)

The one person that had an issue with my being gay was someone I didn't expect. My grandma. She was like my mom growing up and I'd never met a more accepting person. I suppose it might have had to do with my grandfather's death about two years before, that and estrogen blockers. To be honest it was pretty soul crushing, she was the rock I based my life on. Hell, I was still mostly agnostic/leaning theist at the time.

Five years later and our relationship pieced itself back together, still dealing with the occasional snide joke from an uncle or two, but I laugh at them more often than they know. I have a wonderful boyfriend [not furry ] and I think everything has fallen into place quite nicely since.


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## Buxly (Jul 5, 2014)

I'm a gay male and ive always wondered actually. Are there anymore men out there who are like me?

Everyone enjoys having sex regardless of their sexuality except the way I see it is sex is just something you can do for fun or occasions rather than what most people seem to think is a necessary component to a relationship. Basically I could have a perfect relationship and never have sex with them except for occasions. Love ins't about what private parts you have. Its about the feeling of love and your ability to express it for someone genuinely.

Anyone else feel that way too?


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## FenrirDarkWolf (Jul 6, 2014)

Buxly said:


> I'm a gay male and ive always wondered actually. Are there anymore men out there who are like me?
> 
> Everyone enjoys having sex regardless of their sexuality except the way I see it is sex is just something you can do for fun or occasions rather than what most people seem to think is a necessary component to a relationship. Basically I could have a perfect relationship and never have sex with them except for occasions. Love ins't about what private parts you have. Its about the feeling of love and your ability to express it for someone genuinely.
> 
> Anyone else feel that way too?



I agree with all this


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## Buxly (Jul 6, 2014)

So many people just get antsy about the whole "Almost no sex" thing. Jeeze sex isnt much at all ya butts :c


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## Nekokami (Jul 6, 2014)

Buxly said:


> I'm a gay male and ive always wondered actually. Are there anymore men out there who are like me?
> 
> Everyone enjoys having sex regardless of their sexuality except the way I see it is sex is just something you can do for fun or occasions rather than what most people seem to think is a necessary component to a relationship. Basically I could have a perfect relationship and never have sex with them except for occasions. Love ins't about what private parts you have. Its about the feeling of love and your ability to express it for someone genuinely.
> 
> Anyone else feel that way too?


I feel exactly the same! Sex isn't everything.


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## Balto Wolfdog (Jul 9, 2014)

Hi I know you probably already heard this or don't want to, I'm sorry I just need some advice coming out to my parents. I'm not on the best turns with them and they don't have a problem with gays but they don't think it's right and they think I'm straight but I'm not and I'm not really out spoken so this is hard for me. I'd like some advise or your opinions I'd really appreciate it. Thank you


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## Hooky (Jul 9, 2014)

So I'm gay. I'd sooner be with a guy than a girl purely because I feel very little if any sexual attraction for females. I hope I'm right. Is anyone else worrying a little that they've got it wrong?


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 9, 2014)

Balto Wolfdog said:


> Hi I know you probably already heard this or don't want to, I'm sorry I just need some advice coming out to my parents. I'm not on the best turns with them and they don't have a problem with gays but they don't think it's right and they think I'm straight but I'm not and I'm not really out spoken so this is hard for me. I'd like some advise or your opinions I'd really appreciate it. Thank you



What exactly do you mean by not on the best of terms with them? :S

Anywho, if you feel that they would not kick you out or harm you in anyway I would suggest having a heart to heart with both of them at the same time and explaining that you are homosexual. Really its like pulling off a band-aid...you just do it.


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## Balto Wolfdog (Jul 9, 2014)

Butters Shikkon said:


> What exactly do you mean by not on the best of terms with them? :S
> 
> Anywho, if you feel that they would not kick you out or harm you in anyway I would suggest having a heart to heart with both of them at the same time and explaining that you are homosexual. Really its like pulling off a band-aid...you just do it.



Well bad turns being I get into fights with my father over something useless and end with something broke or I leave the house


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## Kerocola (Jul 9, 2014)

There's no way around it but to use your words. Do it as long as you're pretty sure telling them won't make your life unnecessarily difficult, because like it or not you're stuck living with them for a while. It's hard to tell how people receive news though!

If it makes you feel better, I was constantly told how terrible gay people are while growing up. Always heard passive comments about how "if my kid was gay, I'd disown them". I waited until I moved out to say anything, just in case.  I actually ended up not having any problems. Instead, I got an apology for all of the comments that were made while I was growing up. That was more gratifying than I could have ever imagined.


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## Balto Wolfdog (Jul 9, 2014)

Kerocola said:


> There's no way around it but to use your words. Do it as long as you're pretty sure telling them won't make your life unnecessarily difficult, because like it or not you're stuck living with them for a while. It's hard to tell how people receive news though!
> 
> If it makes you feel better, I was constantly told how terrible gay people are while growing up. Always heard passive comments about how "if my kid was gay, I'd disown them". I waited until I moved out to say anything, just in case.  I actually ended up not having any problems. Instead, I got an apology for all of the comments that were made while I was growing up. That was more gratifying than I could have ever imagined.



Yea that's what I'm afraid of, not being excepted but thanks for the words of wisdom


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## Kocyra (Jul 24, 2014)

I'd want to tell my parents, But they are the ultra freaky christian type and I wouldn't want to upset them, I think if I am ever going to do it, It will be via lengthy email, As I couldn't have the strength to tell them in person or even over telecommunications.


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## Casual Cat (Jul 25, 2014)

Kocyra said:


> I'd want to tell my parents, But they are the ultra freaky christian type and I wouldn't want to upset them, I think if I am ever going to do it, It will be via lengthy email, As I couldn't have the strength to tell them in person or even over telecommunications.




Email or a letter is what I'd recommend; You'll be able to say what you want without the fear and stress of the situation making you stumble over your words.

Just don't do what I did, and make your parents find out you were gay (and had just gotten married) over facebook.

...that didn't go over very well.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jul 25, 2014)

Casual Cat said:


> Email or a letter is what I'd recommend; You'll be able to say what you want without the fear and stress of the situation making you stumble over your words.
> 
> Just don't do what I did, and make your parents find out you were gay (and had just gotten married) over facebook.
> 
> ...that didn't go over very well.



:C I have a dad like that. So don't feel alone in the situation.


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## Saga (Jul 25, 2014)

Casual Cat said:


> Email or a letter is what I'd recommend; You'll be able to say what you want without the fear and stress of the situation making you stumble over your words.
> 
> Just don't do what I did, and make your parents find out you were gay (and had just gotten married) over facebook.
> 
> ...that didn't go over very well.


LOL send them an purple envelope, when they open it a bunch of glitter and streamers fly out...


RabidLynx said:


> Person: Are you gay?
> RabidLynx: No... I'm bi
> 
> 
> ...



This so much. I wish I would have just said yes more often


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## Rekel (Jul 27, 2014)

I'd just put a *subtle* sticker on my car window or something. That way people can figure it out, and I don't have work up words and stutter and shit.

Plus, I read on some other thread that if you act open about something, it's not seen as a huge deal and people care less. I very agree.

EDIT: I bolded and underlined "subtle" because stuff like this borderline makes me cringe. http://rlv.zcache.com/honk_if_gay_b...bc519445db19fed4007140fc7_v9wht_8byvr_512.jpg


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## Rhykus Finlay (Jul 31, 2014)

Rekel, loving your avatar, and agreeing with you. Though I just told my parents, more a casual conversation. What they said back was a little weirder honestly, but they accept me anyway.


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## Rekel (Aug 1, 2014)

Rhykus Finlay said:


> Rekel, loving your avatar, and agreeing with you. Though I just told my parents, more a casual conversation. What they said back was a little weirder honestly, but they accept me anyway.



Well, that's good to hear.  I'm just saying _I'm _not good with sensitive subjects, so the sticker is how I'd handle the situation if I were to be in it. Or something like that. It doesn't have to be a sticker.  xD

Also, thanks about the avatar.  It seems to be getting some praise, and that makes me happy.


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## rastaeducation (Aug 5, 2014)

I can't come out for a long time to come, might never, feels bad man.


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## silver_foxfang (Aug 13, 2014)

I haven't come out to anyone but my first and last bf! and that just sorta happened. I'm 21 years old. >.< my dad even told me it was ok if i wasn't straight and that he didn't care. None of my family would care! i just cant spit it out! I have no problem speaking my mind but this crap has my head all jammed up!

 After six years i still cant talk about it! I'm pathetic!!


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## Kitsune Cross (Sep 15, 2014)

I think a friend of mine is gay, he hasn't told me anything but he is like telling obvious and exaggerated gay remarks, like really really exaggerated, I have no problem with him being gay (if he is) but I want him to stop doing this, maybe I should ask? What should I do?


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## galacticGenetics (Sep 15, 2014)

I have only half come out to my family? They think I'm bisexual (or they did in highschool. Now they think it's just a phase) and I guess that'll do? 
Really only my friends know my whole ~*~*~Gender identity and sexuality~*~*~ mainly cause saying it out loud just makes me sound like a tumblr special snowflake wannabe...
I usually get really self conscious about it so with some crowds it's just easier to say I'm straight or I'm hella gay, and it sucks cause I'm such a huge advocate for gender and sexuality!
Everyone should be free and proud of who they are but...personally just for myself it's easier to just be an easy default.


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## galacticGenetics (Sep 15, 2014)

Kocyra said:


> I'd want to tell my parents, But they are the ultra freaky christian type and I wouldn't want to upset them, I think if I am ever going to do it, It will be via lengthy email, As I couldn't have the strength to tell them in person or even over telecommunications.



This is the miracle of technology! It makes these awkward conversations a little less horrific.
If you do decide to go through with telling them, I wish you luck!

Hopefully, even despite their religion, they'll understand that you're their kid and that nothing has changed that!


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## Butters Shikkon (Sep 27, 2014)

Kitsune Cross said:


> I think a friend of mine is gay, he hasn't told me anything but he is like telling obvious and exaggerated gay remarks, like really really exaggerated, I have no problem with him being gay (if he is) but I want him to stop doing this, maybe I should ask? What should I do?



I know its been a few days since this was posted buuuuutttt...

Isn't homophobia like super rampant in your area? Would he be offended? If so, I wouldn't ask and hurt the friendship. But if he's cool with the gays, go ahead and ask. Never hurts to have a friend that you can confide in.


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## Selachi (Oct 10, 2014)

This thread looks completely dead and I didn't expect to be posting anything here anytime soon, but yeah I just spontaneously came out as gay to 6 long time friends of mine last night. Wasn't planned at all, just sort of happened. Up until now, I suspect that my sexuality has always been a huge elephant in the room among my social group. We were at my buddy's house and in the middle of a conversation he just says something along the lines of "Alright ____, what's the deal with you know....you". I think there was a mutual understanding of what was being asked, so I just went for it and said "The deal is that i'm gay as fuck". Everyone was completely floored except for one guy (He was all like "I fucking knew it! I told you guys I was right about him but you wouldn't listen ect...), which was a surprise in itself because I was under the impression that everyone strongly suspected. I guess not though because apparently I don't "come off as gay". After the surprise wore off and some gay jokes got thrown back and forth, it became apparent that it wasn't a big deal to anyone so we moved onto other topics, got hammered, and ended up at Waffle House at 1:30 in the morning haha. Crazy thing is that leading up to this, I had run this exact scenario through my head multiple times before, and it ended up playing out just like I imagined. Best part was how casual it was. No tears and hugs and all that bs. It wasn't a big ordeal, just the way it should be imo. So yeah super proud of my friends for being awesome people. Only concern is that we all work together, and i'd rather it not spread around the workplace but whatever. 

Still though, my love of furfaggotry is staying secret. It's undeniably weird, I can't expect people to understand it, and telling wouldn't accomplish anything. Maybe later on down the road if it becomes super obvious, but still probably not.


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## Llamapotamus (Oct 11, 2014)

mcyclone123 said:


> This thread looks completely dead and I didn't expect to be posting anything here anytime soon, but yeah I just spontaneously came out as gay to 6 long time friends of mine last night. Wasn't planned at all, just sort of happened. Up until now, I suspect that my sexuality has always been a huge elephant in the room among my social group. We were at my buddy's house and in the middle of a conversation he just says something along the lines of "Alright ____, what's the deal with you know....you". I think there was a mutual understanding of what was being asked, so I just went for it and said "The deal is that i'm gay as fuck". Everyone was completely floored except for one guy (He was all like "I fucking knew it! I told you guys I was right about him but you wouldn't listen ect...), which was a surprise in itself because I was under the impression that everyone strongly suspected. I guess not though because apparently I don't "come off as gay". After the surprise wore off and some gay jokes got thrown back and forth, it became apparent that it wasn't a big deal to anyone so we moved onto other topics, got hammered, and ended up at Waffle House at 1:30 in the morning haha. Crazy thing is that leading up to this, I had run this exact scenario through my head multiple times before, and it ended up playing out just like I imagined. Best part was how casual it was. No tears and hugs and all that bs. It wasn't a big ordeal, just the way it should be imo. So yeah super proud of my friends for being awesome people. Only concern is that we all work together, and i'd rather it not spread around the workplace but whatever.
> 
> Still though, my love of furfaggotry is staying secret. It's undeniably weird, I can't expect people to understand it, and telling wouldn't accomplish anything. Maybe later on down the road if it becomes super obvious, but still probably not.



That's legitimately awesome. If only more people would see it's really not a big deal.


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## Nyte Kitsune (Oct 15, 2014)

My family knows I'm a furry.. My grandmother thinks its a bit wierd, but just let it go. My uncle thinks of us in the same lot with the Trekkers, SWToR, Medieval Cosplayers and such (Pretty much true). Alot of my family see's it as part of my Artwork, I do enjoy drawing, and do have stuff posted on Fur Affinity and Deviant Art (Under Sstaan). My sister is cool with it, my nieces think its cool. I think I got lucky having an open minded family though.. They always knew I was a little strange, the fact that I was a bit stranger didn't surprise them.


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## Kosdu (Oct 15, 2014)

Nyte Kitsune said:


> My family knows I'm a furry.. My grandmother thinks its a bit wierd, but just let it go. My uncle thinks of us in the same lot with the Trekkers, SWToR, Medieval Cosplayers and such (Pretty much true). Alot of my family see's it as part of my Artwork, I do enjoy drawing, and do have stuff posted on Fur Affinity and Deviant Art (Under Sstaan). My sister is cool with it, my nieces think its cool. I think I got lucky having an open minded family though.. They always knew I was a little strange, the fact that I was a bit stranger didn't surprise them.



Hey that's good and all, but this is about coming out as LGBT.


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## PastryOfApathy (Oct 22, 2014)

Well I finally came out as trans to my dad. Holy fuck that was terrifying.


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## Kleric (Oct 22, 2014)

I'll admit to it if someone asks the right questions, but so far only one friend has so he's the only one to know that I'm don'tgiveafucksexual (Bi / pan).
I definitely don't show any signs of it, unless you count being single my whole life which makes it a bit more unknown and therefor more questionable. My friend just sometimes asked me if I was gay as a way of picking on me, and I always had justified myself by saying No and nothing more because I wasn't gay, but nor did I need to hint that I wasn't straight either. One day after he asked the same question, and me saying no again, he then asked me if I was bisexual, and then my mind was like "Shit!". I reluctantly said yes, and while he said he was fine with that, I wasn't able to converse about it much (because coming out for the first time I wanted to explain everything), he instead stayed quiet and probably wasn't listening. :|
As for everyone else, I'd prefer not to just blatantly yell it out especially when still living with my parents. While I do think they'd still be accepting of me, It's still a bit scary because they are extreme right wing conservatives and religious. :?


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## Teckolf (Oct 26, 2014)

Honestly, I am confused leaning gay or bi but very much in the closet about it. Luckily no one has ever really thought of me as gay as I tend to be the stereo-typical, don't give a crap, single, bachelor dude. 

The only thing that is fairly obvious is that I am not looking for a girlfriend. Everyone just assumes it is because of the intensity of my schooling. A friend of mine might be catching on though as I don't notice attractive women much at all, and I don't have much of a response when they are pointed out to me.


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## Kleric (Oct 26, 2014)

Teckolf said:


> Honestly, I am confused leaning gay or bi but very much in the closet about it. Luckily no one has ever really thought of me as gay as I tend to be the stereo-typical, don't give a crap, single, bachelor dude.
> 
> The only thing that is fairly obvious is that I am not looking for a girlfriend. Everyone just assumes it is because of the intensity of my schooling. A friend of mine might be catching on though as I don't notice attractive women much at all, and I don't have much of a response when they are pointed out to me.



I will sometimes just play along with my friends if they point out an "attractive" woman, either that or express that I don't care for vanity. I think using the 2nd as a response has maybe led my friends to slightly catch on, but I've yet to be confronted with anything.


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## RabidLynx (Oct 30, 2014)

Finally came out to a few friends after being a pussy for a few years... and it was not as terrifying as I thought it would be. I was actually in shock, because one of my friends had once told me a few years ago that being bisexual was even worse than being gay. But when I noticed that they had become much more accepting of gays, bisexuals, and trans (and I knew this by looking at some pictures on Facebook and a few conversations on the bus), I felt like I could trust them more and more. A few weeks ago, when we got on the bus, they told me they were bi, and I saw that as a door opening and I came out too. I was scared, and my heart was pounding, but they just said "really? that's cool." and they smiled, and we started talking about something else.

I also came out to a couple friends who are also bi, and I had absolutely no idea they were bi too. I have not told my two closest friends yet, but I think one of them is starting to catch on, and the other one I'm not sure what they think about gays so I'm just going to wait on that one...

I'm so happy to see that being gay/bi/anything other than straight/cis is starting to become accepting and not a "bad thing" anymore. I still think gay pride is stupid and your sexuality shouldn't be a big fucking deal, but I'm glad that in the society we're starting to get right in the middle.


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## VintageLynx (Nov 11, 2014)

Teckolf said:


> Honestly, I am confused leaning gay or bi but very much in the closet about it. Luckily no one has ever really thought of me as gay as I tend to be the stereo-typical, don't give a crap, single, bachelor dude.
> 
> The only thing that is fairly obvious is that I am not looking for a girlfriend. Everyone just assumes it is because of the intensity of my schooling. A friend of mine might be catching on though as I don't notice attractive women much at all, and I don't have much of a response when they are pointed out to me.



I could have written that! Where I work there are a few single engineer dudes but somehow engineers never speak about sex/relationships. It's like if its not in the blueprint or user manual then it doesn't exist. Being that there are mainly men there its not like I can even chat with women - its uptight batchelor engineer dudes all the way. The days seem long...


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## DammitMax (Nov 18, 2014)

I came out fully as pansexual and transgender to my family and I'm so lucky that they all support me. I've just recently been put on hormones too


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## Ayattar (Nov 18, 2014)

PastryOfApathy said:


> Well I finally came out as trans to my dad. Holy fuck that was terrifying.



Pics or didn't happen.


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## MyLittleFnordy (Nov 21, 2014)

OK I'll say something here but I need to tell some background stuff first. When I was 13 I was very much bi, this made my parents a little bit upset. I later had a long term relationship with an older man for five years. It wasn't exactly a health relationship either. I was young and stupid. To be perfectly honest none of this made anyone batter an eyelid (Liberal UK good times) but now I am much older and only just rediscovering who and what I am. The first thing I did was discuss this with the missus. I expected to be thrown out of the house, bags packed and everything. It didn't go down like that. She is 100% behind me. We were always a bit of a kink couple and she wanted me to explore the full range of who I am. She already did so. I'm old though [30 :'(], I have responsibilities and time is a valued commodity. It's a relief that all this is OK but to me it's the least of my worries right now. I suppose these things loose impact as you get older.


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## Kookyfox (Nov 23, 2014)

I recently came out as gay to my friends at the University. I was amazed by their reactions: pretty much all of them were like "Yeah that's cool man... that's all you wanted you wanted to tell me?". The most extreme reaction I had was: "oh wait you're serious? oh well that's cool for you.." . It may seem ordinary to most of you but for me it was really surprising. I used to live in a smaller town in France, that you might because of a really famous song about it's really famous bridge. There I only made my coming out to a few close friends but their reactions a lot different. They were really surprised, they thought I wanted to bang them, that I was some kind of sex-crazed deviant, when I talk to them even today they get really distant and alaways mock me for what I am. One of the girls I came out to (she told me that she loved me, so I had to tell her) even proposed me to go see a priest to "cure" me.
I am really glad that my new friends here are much more tolerant! as for my family there's no way I'd tell them! My mom expects me to become a good father, my sister is way too young to know, my father would be disappointed and the rest of my family are either intolerant, or just conservative, sometimes both.


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## NightWolf (Dec 30, 2014)

I'm in an unusual stage. My parents don't know that I'm gay (they might suspect I am, but don't have confirmation. It's basically 'dont ask, dont tell') but basically everyone else knows I'm gay. I don't deny it but I don't announce it either. 

I came out to myself and accepted me being gay a few years ago. I knew I was different all my life. I wasn't attracted to girls like everyone else and I tried having girlfriends, but it never worked out. I can be friends with a girl, but I couldn't be in a romantic relationship with one. I tried to tell myself I would have man-crushes. 

This might sound weird, but it was watching the new Star Trek movie from 2009 and I realized I was attracted to Nero. He's basically the one who made me realize I was gay and I accepted it.


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## fureedom (Jan 1, 2015)

I've been trying to definitively discover my sexuality since I was 14.  Throughout high school, I had feelings for both sexes, but the latter  two years I thought I was completely gay, but only told two female  friends. Met a guy I liked over FA. He lived in Toronto and I live in  Chicago. His father had business in Chicago, so he tagged along and we  met. I woke up early and picked them up from the airport and finally  hung out with the dude I've been talking to online for about a year. His  father knew everything, but my parents knew nothing. As Murphy's law  would have it, what ensued was a series of lies and extremely anxiety  provoking situations. All because I'm too insecure to tell the truth. I  ridiculously attempted to keep all the stories straight and maintain all  the lies I told. My parents were confused and frustrated with me, but  they started talking to my man's dad and he may have taken a more  professional approach to easing the tension and maintaining the status  quo regarding what my parents knew.

As I'm typing this (and this  is also why I'm typing this whole thing out) I'm realizing just how  extremely insecure I am... but maybe insecurity is a function of  transient anxiety...maybe it's why I like drugs and alcohol so much..  hmm

From this point forward my parents did not probe for  information at all and I avoided any conversation that may have even  lead to that. My man visited once more during the holidays and I visited  him in Toronto that following summer. Our "in person" relationship was  very sexually stimulating (even though we never moved past blowjobs) but  inevitably failed to develop any of the qualitative constituents such  as pushing psychological boundaries and sacrificing time, energy,  resources that you would not have sacrificed were it not for your  significant other. Perhaps we were too young for that.

My parents  are not homophobic, but my fear is that they'll treat me differently if  I told them I was bisexual. They'll spew the stereotypical shit that  the media drilled into their skulls at me. They'll ask me if I'm going  to the pride parade. They'll ask me if I find this, that, and the other  man attractive. 

I'm not trying to hear that.

Seriously, what pisses me off is the *gasp* reaction to coming out (positive or negative). Honestly I wish it were like:

Me: "Hey mom, I got accepted into College University"
Mother: "That's wonderful! I wish you the best of luck, not that you'll need it" (or some bullshit like that)
Me: "btw I'm bisexual"
Mother: "That's wonderful! I wish you the best of luck, not that you'll need it"

END
OF
CONVERSATION

This  is why I'm not attracted to flamboyant gay men. They perpetuate the  gasp factor and cause MORE anxiety for those of us who aren't as secure  as they are. My dream is to fuck a straight guy, that way I'll be more  secure than he is and I won't feel as bad and I'll also know just how to  treat the guy.

Once me and my man drifted apart, I didn't have  sex for almost two years and I began to use drugs.. a lot of drugs.. It  came to a point were it was not uncommon for me to insufflate 80mg  oxycodone salts and take five 20mg amphetamine tablets throughout the  day. I developed a problem and did my time in a psychiatric hospital  because of it. I stayed completely clean and sober for 9 months  following my release, now I dabble here and there to keep my sanity. The  only reason I'm telling you this is because I have a feeling that this  may in part be due to my insecurities.

Then I met a girl

She's  fun, she's loving, she's loopy, she understands me, and I love her. I  told her I was bisexual before we started dating and even inquired about  threesomes with another man (which she declined). It was still worth it  for me and we've been dating for four years. I don't regret a thing,  but I still get sexual urges for other men that I don't know what to do  with... and I have to do something with them.

I used to work with  this chubby dude who gained literally 70lbs in 6 months(I am fetish).  He went to reach for something, "excuse me, sorry dude" and his moob  brushed up against my forearm... I just melted. I had to go to the  bathroom to wait for my cock to stop throbbing (has anybody ever rubbed  one out at work? I've done it before and I don't know if it's worth the  anxiety of walking out of the bathroom after that haha)

Thats why  I don't understand why sex and relationships have to be directly  correlated. I think sex should be more like, "Oh and I grabbed a cup of  coffee with Hector this morning." Just on some casual shit.

Also, I know I'm not completely gay because I don't want to _hold hands and walk into the sunset_  with another man. I find kissing another man extremely uncomfortable.  It is SEX AND ONLY SEX, other than that it is best friends and roomates.  I get much more romantic with women.

Thanks to everyfur willing to dissect this and make suggestions or give advice. I owe you nine blowjobs.


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## fureedom (Jan 2, 2015)

Take that last post with a grain of salt. It's not that serious. JEEZ I'm fucking worse than menopausal women.


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## Half-Note (Jan 2, 2015)

Realized that I had a certain interest in guys a while back, though I'd say I'm into girls more so than guys. Then again, if I'm interested in the person and the person is interested in me, I don't see a reason not to go for it regardless of gender. As for telling, I never told anyone. Didn't see the point. Didn't need any support after realizing it, though I was in denial for a while.


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## Mike Lobo (Jan 18, 2015)

I'm debating on whether or not I want to come out to my family as bisexual, though I'm into girls more than guys. Most of them are very devout Jehovah's Witnesses, and the only who isn't, my dad who doesn't belong to any religion, is just plain homophobic.

I don't think it's worth it, to be honest. They'll just get upset.


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## Naesaki (Jan 18, 2015)

I realised I was gay around 14-15, but when I was around 12, my middle brother who is 11 years older came out as well, so I had a concept and understanding of it, and then when I was 16 my Uncle came out as well, the gay gene is strong in my family it seems xD 

But I only came out August last year (22 then), I wasn't like keeping it hidden from any particular reason by that time, I had just gotten used to keeping it hidden due to how bad high school was and College was just meh and the people I knew I didn't feel they deserved to know me in full, as to why I kept it from my family until I was 22, I honestly couldn't say.

My middle brother had "seen" the signs when I realised it myself at 15, but never brought it up until I was ready but he had found I had an account on a site he was apart of and I wasn't aware he was on there, he comes to visit one day, walks into my room, sits on my bed and stares at me with a deadpan expression for like a whole minute. "Is there something you want to tell me?" his expression doesn't change, I stare blankly wondering what the hell he's going on about, then he breaks into a cheeky grin and says the site's name.

I immediately turn bright red, he still let me tell the rest of my family in my own time, I prepare, go downstairs, pause the TV my parents are watching, I sit down and tell them and they just stare point blank "Oh? Okay then, we still love you." and I'm like thats it? I ask them "So you've never thought about it, never assumed or anything?" and without a beat they go "Why would it matter to us? as long as you're happy, we are happy." 

and the rest they say, is history.


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## Saiko (Jan 19, 2015)

Oh my god! It has been over THREE FUCKING YEARS since I came out, and my dad still emails me links to christian articles about it being bad. How long is it going to take for him to figure this thing out? Am I going to have to bring a guy next time I visit and just fuck in the living room? I'm out of reasonable ideas here. -_-


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## Butters Shikkon (Jan 19, 2015)

Saiko said:


> Oh my god! It has been over THREE FUCKING YEARS since I came out, and my dad still emails me links to christian articles about it being bad. How long is it going to take for him to figure this thing out? Am I going to have to bring a guy next time I visit and just fuck in the living room? I'm out of reasonable ideas here. -_-



Sai, you may have to come to terms with the fact your dad may never accept it. Hell, the mother of my brother's bf took almost 10 years to come to terms with her prejudice. It's a shitty situation but it's our cross to bear sadly. 

Stay strong, guy.


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## Saiko (Jan 19, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Sai, you may have to come to terms with the fact your dad may never accept it. Hell, the mother of my brother's bf took almost 10 years to come to terms with her prejudice. It's a shitty situation but it's our cross to bear sadly.
> 
> Stay strong, guy.


Oh dun worry. I'm not upset or anything notable, just mildly annoyed. It's actually starting to get funny at this point. A couple years ago he sent me one article that had me shaking at the time, and now I can't help but giggle when I remember it advising dad's to play ball with their sons to keep the gay away. And then there was the time I tried to bring Yago home, and he made us stay in a hotel... and then months later they asked why I was going to bed early. I told them that I was gonna go to bed on skype call with Yago, and he asks "Are you sure you want to encourage this behavior?" referring to sleeping together and such as if we hadn't already "encouraged any behaviors" at that damn hotel. XD


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## Teckolf (Jan 19, 2015)

So, I have only recently come to terms with myself about my sexuality. I have realized that I am mostly-gay. An occasional woman still catches my eye but in general I notice guys. Took me most of college to come to terms with this, so kudos to those who knew at an earlier age. Looking back I really should have known but I guess I never gave it much thought. 

As far as coming out... Haven't and haven't really considered it yet. I am currently super-focused on graduating and getting the hell out of school. My parents are super-christian, and I am very close to both of them, so I am absolutely terrified about whenever they find out (if ever). I figure once I am completely financially independent and if I ever actually have a BF, I might tell them...


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## JegoLego (Jan 19, 2015)

Teckolf said:


> So, I have only recently come to terms with myself about my sexuality. I have realized that I am mostly-gay. An occasional woman still catches my eye but in general I notice guys. Took me most of college to come to terms with this, so kudos to those who knew at an earlier age. Looking back I really should have known but I guess I never gave it much thought.
> 
> As far as coming out... Haven't and haven't really considered it yet. I am currently super-focused on graduating and getting the hell out of school. My parents are super-christian, and I am very close to both of them, so I am absolutely terrified about whenever they find out (if ever). I figure once I am completely financially independent and if I ever actually have a BF, I might tell them...




It's the same here, except i'm more focused on women than men.  I haven't been able to come out as bisexual.  my family is Christian, and i'm from southern USA, not a good mix.  I'm planning to move to California or Florida sometime after college, but until then i guess coming out will have to wait...


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Jan 19, 2015)

Saiko said:


> Oh dun worry. I'm not upset or anything notable, just mildly annoyed. It's actually starting to get funny at this point. A couple years ago he sent me one article that had me shaking at the time, and now I can't help but giggle when I remember it advising dad's to play ball with their sons to keep the gay away. And then there was the time I tried to bring Yago home, and he made us stay in a hotel... and then months later they asked why I was going to bed early. I told them that I was gonna go to bed on skype call with Yago, and he asks "Are you sure you want to encourage this behavior?" referring to sleeping together and such as if we hadn't already "encouraged any behaviors" at that damn hotel. XD



He made Yago stay in a hotel? That's so...un-southern. :c


----------



## Teckolf (Jan 19, 2015)

JegoLego said:


> It's the same here, except i'm more focused on women than men.  I haven't been able to come out as bisexual.  my family is Christian, and i'm from southern USA, not a good mix.  I'm planning to move to California or Florida sometime after college, but until then i guess coming out will have to wait...



I am in the panhandle still pretty southern. It doesnt get north again until orlando/tampa.


----------



## Saiko (Jan 19, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> He made Yago stay in a hotel? That's so...un-southern. :c


He made us both stay in one. And no... the sad thing is that it isn't all that un-southern at all. "Southern hospitality" generally depends upon your fitting in. o.e


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Jan 19, 2015)

Saiko said:


> He made us both stay in one. And no... the sad thing is that it isn't all that un-southern at all. "Southern hospitality" generally depends upon your fitting in. o.e



That's the joke. ;3

But in all seriousness, I can only hope LGBT like us and other enlightened folk can change the culture of southern U.S.  in this century. I'm so tired of it being known for ignorance and discrimination and hate. :3 It'd be so great if we could get people to really vamp up that "hospitality" and "sweetness" and make it a place worth living.


----------



## Pingouin7 (Jan 19, 2015)

-snip-


----------



## Saiko (Jan 20, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> That's the joke. ;3
> 
> But in all seriousness, I can only hope LGBT like us and other enlightened folk can change the culture of southern U.S.  in this century. I'm so tired of it being known for ignorance and discrimination and hate. :3 It'd be so great if we could get people to really vamp up that "hospitality" and "sweetness" and make it a place worth living.


Blegh, to be completely honest, I'm completely disenfranchised with the place. There's so much shit alongside the LGBT problems that I just want to get out.


----------



## Torph (Jan 27, 2015)

I came out as bisexual when I was 15 years old, that is 8 years ago. My mom didn't believe me at first, but she accepted it. I can't say any one in my family had a problem with it, even though my family live in a little village in northern Sweden. I think it's about 130 people that lives there  
But now I live in southern Sweden, together with my boyfriend. Everything feels great at the moment


----------



## Taikugemu (Jan 27, 2015)

Sadly i still in the closet IRL.


----------



## Kleric (Jan 27, 2015)

Pingouin7 said:


> -snip-


That's really awesome Pingouin. Hope things turn out well for you when finally meeting him!


----------



## Muln (Jan 27, 2015)

When I came out of me mommy's belly I told her I like minotaurs. She threw me out the window and landed on the psychiatry ward.


----------



## Horsefur (Feb 4, 2015)

When I came out to one of my best friends months ago who's Mormon I fully expected the worst reaction possible. He just looked at me odd and said "Oh..." and i just kind sat there stuck on what to say and said "You hate me now don't you?" he was really nice about it and just said "No, I don't hate you for that, it's who you are. You don't look or show you're gay in any way, so it's shocking" but after that he would barley talk to me at all and kinda avoid me for 4 months, then I suppose he finally came to terms with it's who I am and it's honestly just like how we were before  I expected him not to talk to me for maybe a few days, but I gave up on him being my friend again after a month, thankfully he finally came to terms with it though, so if there is anyone whos friend still isn't to terms with you, just hang in there  everything will be back to how it was before, just gotta ride it out


----------



## Wolfsky (Feb 15, 2015)

Ok first thing first I am bi.  I've only told two of my friends and plan to tell two more.  Don't ready want to tell my parents cause its something that they don't really need to know.  Second Naesaki I think your photo is sooo cute.  Omg I just want to cuddle with him.  Haha XD.  I would also have to agree with you.  I enjoy having sex with guys but actually having a full blown relationship just scares me away.  And it's not only sex but cuddling with the ones I find cute and just hanging out.  But having a kid with one.  Uhh not for me.  I am not a homophobe for that just don't find it suites me.   I find that I can have a more romantic relationship with a girl.  And I would love to fall in love with a girl who is also bi so we could both talk about how cute a guy or girl is. XP.  I did have a guy who is gay and was a close friend who I did have sexual acts with and we did cuddle which was awesome.  But I hate to say it but he wanted a relationship and I freaked and ran.  But that's all for me.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Mar 23, 2015)

So I kinda sorta made a post on facebook that asked if any of my past coworkers had one of my uber sweet best work buddy's phone number. And then I had to explain I didn't have it because I left that place in such a hurry when the homophobic managers were condemning "my lifestyle" to my face in a very awkward office meeting. 

That's sorta like coming out I guess. I really hope I don't get any nasty remarks from supposed work friends. That would be a real downer to say the least.


----------



## tacticaldogtags (Apr 2, 2015)

I have only exposed to a small group of people that I am bi. The only sexual thing we done was we all sat in one room and jerked off.


----------



## LazerMaster5 (Apr 2, 2015)

So I'm a biplane, bitches. *flies away*


----------



## Kinharia (Apr 2, 2015)

I am a pansexual-asexual gender fluid person. That sounds weird, I'm a Furry.


----------



## wolfy-jay93 (Apr 2, 2015)

I'm a totally fabulous glitter gay furry!  Out to all of my family and friends about being gay and also out to some friends and family about furry. I'm straight acting so people don't suspect me


----------



## LazerMaster5 (Apr 2, 2015)

It's fine to be gay, but why glitter? I hate glitter. It gets fucking everywhere, and it magically sticks and makes everything look like a little girl's room. Fuck that shit.


----------



## tacticaldogtags (Apr 2, 2015)

LazerMaster5 said:


> It's fine to be gay, but why glitter? I hate glitter. It gets fucking everywhere, and it magically sticks and makes everything look like a little girl's room. Fuck that shit.


I agree.


----------



## facelessmaker (Apr 20, 2015)

I love this thread.

Edit: Aside from the first part. I've decided to delete the rest. I was drunk and it was weird.


----------



## Aggro (Apr 24, 2015)

So, I'm confused about myself, quite frankly. See, I've tried to have girlfriends, and I have had a few, but I'm never happy in a relationship, and I always break it off before 2 weeks. I always want to have a happy relationship, it just never happens. And I've sort of thought about being gay, and I guess I'm in to that sort of stuff. It's like the only thing I can really get off to anymore. I don't know. I'm just super confused.


----------



## Kleric (Apr 24, 2015)

Aggro said:


> So, I'm confused about myself, quite frankly. See, I've tried to have girlfriends, and I have had a few, but I'm never happy in a relationship, and I always break it off before 2 weeks. I always want to have a happy relationship, it just never happens. And I've sort of thought about being gay, and I guess I'm in to that sort of stuff. It's like the only thing I can really get off to anymore. I don't know. I'm just super confused.



I dunno, you seemed to explain it quite clearly; not sure what the confusion is about... Do you just not feel comfortable identifying as gay? .-.


----------



## xAngelStormx (Apr 24, 2015)

> Snails are cool as hell. Have you ever just watched one?


I've never even seen a snail. Note: I lived in France for 10 years-ish.

I thought this thread was closed? =á´¥= Am I crazy?

...seriously, I thought this was closed.


----------



## Aggro (Apr 25, 2015)

It's not that I'm not comfortable with it, I really am, I just want to be sure, you know? I want to know if it's just some weird fluke or phase before coming out to anyone, because my family isn't going to like it one bit.


----------



## Astrium (Apr 25, 2015)

Aggro said:


> It's not that I'm not comfortable with it, I really am, I just want to be sure, you know? I want to know if it's just some weird fluke or phase before coming out to anyone, because my family isn't going to like it one bit.



Hook up for a one-night stand with a random guy on Craigslist. Then you'll know for sure.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 25, 2015)

Well, here's the easy peesy dick squeezy way to tell. 

If a naked man gets your weenie a broilin', you're gay. If a nekkid gurl does, you're straight. If both you're on god-mode, mister.


----------



## Kinharia (Apr 25, 2015)

So I thought I'd go into detail about myself instead of just the one line I gave before.

When I was a child growing up I always had dreams were I'd think of myself as a girl but I just thought "Meh I feel bad for my sister, this is god trying to show me what it is like for her" (I was raised catholic). Then when I hit puberty I would look around and I'd see people coming out as gay, I'd see friends getting into relationships and people would be all like "Hey look at her shes hot! Well what about her! Him?" and I'd just sit there thinking "What's the point?". My mother when the topic of LGBT was brought up would always say "There is nothing wrong with Gays or Lesbians and Bisexuals are just greedy (the bisexual part was always a joke from one of her favourite tv shows) but transexuals there has to be something wrong there. 

Now I still had these ideas of me being a girl but I always knew that although a part of me wanted to be a girl another part was just as strong as remaining male so I supressed those thoughts entirely as I didn't want to say "Well sometimes I feel female but others I feel fine as I am" only to have people say to me "You're just perverted". I had no idea about Gender Fluid being a thing at this point. I never really enjoyed the idea of dating growing up and I never really enjoyed the idea of sex either so I put off trying to find someone as I had no sexual feelings for anyone, I thought I was Bisexual for a while as I would look at guys and girls and think "Well they are kind of cute, kind of like a nice art piece but no more" so I started supressing any idea of liking guys as the idea of sex was (and still is) quite revolting. I eventually had sex with two girls (no not at the same time ) and really I was left thinking "This is it? When does the good part come? This is it?" and well the idea of sex still revolts me ^_^. 

After a while of being in this fandom and thanks to the teamspeak as well I started to feel more comfortable with myself, friends pointed me to sites that helped me discover who I am and know that "Hey, this is an actual thing!" and so at the end of March I came out as Gender Fluid and still kept to my asexuality at the same time. I feel comfortable to look at people of the same gender and opposite gender and see the beauty in them and not have to worry about others going "Hurr Durr, you want yiff" as I know I don't and that to me is all that matters. I regret not becoming a part of the fandom offically sooner but I am so glad I did!


----------



## TrishaCat (Apr 25, 2015)

Found out that I'm bi.
I'm honestly deathly afraid for no good reason of meeting a guy I like because I fear explaining such to my parents.
My parents would be totally cool with it, so its not as if I have any good reason for being afraid of such a situation. I just...fear it. I think the worst part of it is that I don't want to disappoint my dad. I respect him so much, and I'm afraid it'd come off as a disappointment to him.


----------



## facelessmaker (Apr 25, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Well, here's the easy peesy dick squeezy way to tell.
> 
> If a naked man gets your weenie a broilin', you're gay. If a nekkid gurl does, you're straight. If both you're on god-mode, mister.


 Yea, but what if it's just that cock that you're gay for? That's my dilemma. In the furry realm I'm bi without a doubt but the real male figure, aside from the mid-section when I'm in that kind of mood, just doesn't quite spark anything yet. Furry males? No problem at all.


----------



## Sylox (Apr 25, 2015)

It felt "weird" whenever me and another guy would wrestle when I was 8 years old. By 13 I knew I was bi and at on my 21st birthday, I accepted myself. I only decided to come out this year, because I was tired of hiding something that I knew my parents wouldn't object to. I feel terrible for wasting a good portion of my life in the closet and doing everything in my power to be "normal" and maintain a facade that seemed to fool everyone (including me) for a long time. I have done many things to suppress and ultimately rid myself of being bisexual that I'm not proud of. From about 15 until 17, I was VERY religious; I'm talking about like WBC religious. I used to gay bash all of the time and think nothing of it. I would tease LGBT people, cyber bully them and one time, I beat up a gay person and almost got arrested for it; I'm not proud of this at all.

By the time I left for college, I softened my stances a bit, dropping the idea that being gay was a choice and started to support civil unions and then same-sex marriage; this was when I was a Progressive/social justice warrior. The less I became religious, the more open I became as a person. Of course, when I was depressed and had entered into a death spiral towards the absolute lowest, I hated myself and told myself I was abnormal because I wasn't straight. Again I started to think that I had a disease and was not normal at all. I feared being beaten up and ostracized by my peers; you have to realize, being LGBT in the African American community isn't fondly looked upon and the HBCU I was at for 3 years, well, lets just say they weren't friendly towards LGBT folk. So this was about the beginning of 2011, and I looked into conversion camps/programs and I once again took to gay bashing and eventually found myself cyber bullying people on Yahoo Answers. I'd bully them for HOURS, literally, that became my "social life" and the religious trolls and douchebags were my "circle". In April I reached rock bottom and almost killed myself. I was very depressed for months and continued to troll YA!, until I somebody retaliated and put me in my place. Now it was...I guess November and I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and began to actually give a shit about my life. I started to groom myself, dress better, be more open minded and laugh a little.

So now it's February 2012 and I planned on telling my parents when they got back from Madi Gras that I was bi, because they wouldn't have cared, sadly, my father had a heart attack the day he got back and on the 21st, he died. I was crushed and I reverted to that dark place for a long time. In May, I decided to accept myself, realizing that I had grown up alot to that point; I accepted that it wasn't a choice, and I would always have a thing for both men and women; why fight it, accept it. My cousins, one who is gay and one who's a Lesbian, figured it out in 2013 when we went on vacation and couldn't stop eyeing this hot guy with blue eyes, OMG, he was so fine. Anyway, fast foward to April 1, 2015. That evening after I came back from my trip, I decided to spill the beans to my mom. Being out of my room gave me time to think and I told her that I was bisexual. She just said "Okay, w/e makes you happy." Since then, she hasn't looked at me any differently and life still goes on as it should. 

Well, that's my story. All I can say is that I hope somebody who's a teen and is reading this, doesn't make the same mistake I did. Don't end up wasting your life being angry all of the time and doubting who you are as a person. It's not worth it.


----------



## belmonkey (Apr 26, 2015)

I have quite an identity dilemma that bugs me a lot. I'm a guy and I've been with my bf for 3 years, and yet my sexual interest is still mostly towards women. I'm more romantically attracted to guys, but my body seems to want a woman (doesn't stop me from doing stuff with my bf though). To complicate things even further, I've had ideas of becoming a girl since I was a teen (10 years ago), but I cannot even tell if it was just fantasies or something more that I desired to be a reality. I wish I could just simply be gay and not have such conflicting feelings.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 26, 2015)

If only life were so simple.


----------



## Wax (Apr 26, 2015)

I'm gay. I told my mother like two years ago now... I mentioned it to her once again in that same year and have mentioned literally nothing about it to her since. She took it totally fine, but it just never comes up in conversation.
When it comes to telling people, I start to feel very weird. It's almost as though the notion of me being gay doesn't sit right with me... I don't like talking about it, I just want people to know that: "_I'm gay, I'm the same person I was before, but if we ever talk about relationships just know that I'm into dudes. Thanks._" But the truth is I'm hella gay and am pretty open about it _mentally._

I've got a pretty close circle of extremely kind and compassionate friends in a group chat on facebook, I'm thinking of telling them, but again it just doesn't sit right with me, them knowing. It's probably nerves, though.
I have forever felt that all of my friends just low-key know anyway, they're just waiting for me to come out (pun not intended) and tell them.


----------



## Astrium (Apr 30, 2015)

Battlechili1 said:


> Found out that I'm bi.
> I'm honestly deathly afraid for no good reason of meeting a guy I like because I fear explaining such to my parents.
> My parents would be totally cool with it, so its not as if I have any good reason for being afraid of such a situation. I just...fear it. I think the worst part of it is that I don't want to disappoint my dad. I respect him so much, and I'm afraid it'd come off as a disappointment to him.



This summarizes my thoughts pretty well. Even though my parents are pretty liberal, I'm not 100% certain they'd be cool with me being bi and so I haven't really told them yet. I probably won't unless I end with a boyfriend and a lot of explaining to do. It just doesn't seem like it really matters otherwise. That's actually my reasoning for not telling my friends either. I just don't really see why they need to know at the moment. If it becomes important, I'll tell them, but otherwise I just haven't really had a reason yet.


----------



## Imperial Impact (Apr 30, 2015)

Why is this still a thing?


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 30, 2015)

Imperial Impact said:


> Why is this still a thing?



Homophobia, noob?


----------



## Imperial Impact (Apr 30, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Homophobia, noob?


It's 2015.

Being gay is like one of the last things people should be worrying about.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 30, 2015)

Imperial Impact said:


> It's 2015.
> 
> Being gay is like one of the last things people should be worrying about.



Kinda embarrassing that there is still homophobia in 2015, yes. People shouldn't have to endure bullshit for being born as God made em. Glad you agree.


----------



## Kinharia (Apr 30, 2015)

Can't speak for the US but I can speak for Ireland. Things are different here and LGBTQA are still treated very differently here. It's changing that is for sure but families hold a view of "I don't mind Gays or Lesbians so long as my child isn't one. Oh and there is no such thing as Bisexuals they are just confused and people who are Transgender are sick in the head.  What is a Genderqueer? Asexuals can't exist, everyone likes sex"


----------



## Astrium (Apr 30, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Kinda embarrassing that there is still homophobia in 2015, yes. People shouldn't have to endure bullshit for being born as God made em. Glad you agree.



I am actually legitimately confused by homophobia (and racism and sexism for that matter). I mean, _Homo sapiens _have been on Earth for 200,000 years, how have we not firgured out how to not be shitheads to each other yet?


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

Homophobia is a symptom of human nature. Like racism and sexism, no matter how much you educate people, it will always exist.


----------



## Imperial Impact (Apr 30, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Kinda embarrassing that there is still homophobia in 2015, yes. People shouldn't have to endure bullshit for being born as God made em. Glad you agree.


I mean, at this day of age, We have SJW, Bronies, redditfags, tumblrfags, Let's players .etc  walk among the earth.

Being a fucking brony is more embarrassing than being gay.


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

Imperial Impact said:


> Being a fucking brony is more embarrassing than being gay.



It's not embarrassing at all.


----------



## Imperial Impact (Apr 30, 2015)

Sylox said:


> It's not embarrassing at all.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_qYKztlVXs


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

I cringed as I watched that video.


----------



## Koota (Apr 30, 2015)

Sylox said:


> I cringed as I watched that video.


Haha


----------



## LazerMaster5 (Apr 30, 2015)

Sylox said:


> I cringed as I watched that video.


How do you feel about your fellow bronies now?


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

No comment


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 30, 2015)

Imperial Impact said:


> Being a fucking brony is more embarrassing than being gay.



I know you're trying to be cute and all, but this thread is for people who need support from the ACTUAL abuse and discrimination they receive in real life, hun. And also the institutional discrimination they face like being fired from jobs, unable to teach, and lack of marriage rights. 

So if you could take your "lol I think such and such is more embarrassing than fags" shit elsewhere, that'd be great.


----------



## Naesaki (Apr 30, 2015)

Kinharia said:


> Can't speak for the US but I can speak for Ireland. Things are different here and LGBTQA are still treated very differently here. It's changing that is for sure but families hold a view of "I don't mind Gays or Lesbians so long as my child isn't one. Oh and there is no such thing as Bisexuals they are just confused and people who are Transgender are sick in the head.  What is a Genderqueer? Asexuals can't exist, everyone likes sex"



Isn't there another referendum coming up soon in regards to a few LGBTQA things in Ireland?


----------



## Kinharia (Apr 30, 2015)

Naesaki said:


> Isn't there another referendum coming up soon in regards to a few LGBTQA things in Ireland?



In the South yeah, but the British veto'd the proposed referendum up here in the north for the 4th fucking time in a row because "It goes against the rules of the bible" Well Mr. Peter Robertson, present your wife to the mob for sleeping with an 21 year old man as that is against the rules of the bible. Oh wait that'd affect you so it doesn't count? Some fucking Christian >.>


----------



## Astrium (Apr 30, 2015)

Kinharia said:


> In the South yeah, but the British veto'd the proposed referendum up here in the north for the 4th fucking time in a row because "It goes against the rules of the bible" Well Mr. Peter Robertson, present your wife to the mob for sleeping with an 21 year old man as that is against the rules of the bible. Oh wait that'd affect you so it doesn't count? Some fucking Christian >.>



You know, it honestly never occurred to me that England would have a heavily religious party like most of the American Republicans until now. I don't know why I never thought about it, I guess it's just because I don't follow foreign politics much. I pretty much assumed that all the English political parties are pretty secular. I have learned something today.


----------



## Koota (Apr 30, 2015)

....


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

Why would you care? If they want to be religious, let them. That seems extremely hypocritical.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 30, 2015)

Sylox said:


> Why would you care? If they want to be religious, let them. That seems extremely hypocritical.



Religion isn't a natural thing for humans like homosexuality is, but whatevs~

Let's not make this sticky thread a religion one, k? Ya'll keep this to coming out and support for those suffering from homophobia.


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Religion isn't a natural thing for humans like homosexuality is, but whatevs~
> 
> Let's not make this sticky thread a religion one, k? Ya'll keep this to coming out and support for those suffering from homophobia.



I'm not, I'm just saying its hypocritical. You need to relax.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (Apr 30, 2015)

Sylox said:


> I'm not, I'm just saying its hypocritical. You need to relax.



And I told you it's not because religion and spirituality are different things, hun. I was quite civil with you in any case.


----------



## Astrium (Apr 30, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Religion isn't a natural thing for humans like homosexuality is, but whatevs~
> 
> Let's not make this sticky thread a religion one, k? Ya'll keep this to coming out and support for those suffering from homophobia.



As a... Well, I guess the best word to describe my religious affiliation is "agnostic", although I still don't think that quite describes it, I think religion is pretty natural for humans. We've always looked for a way to explain the things we didn't understand in the world and reassure us that our lives have meaning. Regardless of whether there's really a god/gods/Xenu/flying spaghetti monster/what have you or not (and it will be debated until the end of time), I'd say religion has done exactly that.

But back on topic now, I really wouldn't give a shit what my hypothetical kids were or were not into as long as they weren't hurting themselves or anyone else. I'm a pretty live-and-let-live sort of person.


----------



## LazerMaster5 (Apr 30, 2015)

This thread was made to be customer support for LGBT people, not a religion flame war. Please don't ruin it.


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

There is no religious flame war. >_>


----------



## Astrium (Apr 30, 2015)

Sylox said:


> There is no religious flame war. >_>



We could easily have started one and still might. This is partially my fault.


----------



## Sylox (Apr 30, 2015)

Le'ts just get back OT.


----------



## TheRuralWolfDog (May 14, 2015)

(delete post please)


----------



## Butters Shikkon (May 14, 2015)

TheRuralWolfDog said:


> Not sure if I can post here or not. I'm not Gay or Bi. However, Coming out of the Closet as a Furry is much more difficult IMHO.



3/10. It's been done and you made it too obvious with the "Ftw I'm being totally serious too."


----------



## Astrium (May 14, 2015)

TheRuralWolfDog said:


> Not sure if I can post here or not. I'm not Gay or Bi. However, *Coming out of the Closet as a Furry is much more difficult IMHO*.



No. Stop it. You don't need to "come out" as a furry. It's a hobby.


----------



## TheRuralWolfDog (May 14, 2015)

Astrium said:


> No. Stop it. You don't need to "come out" as a furry. It's a hobby.



I'm not going to argue. However if you lived in my small town. You'd feel the same. 

Hobby....The Fandom yes. The fursona...Did you read I am a Therian?

I've obviously stepped on some toes by posting in THIS thread. I'll remove it and post elsewhere if I can. 
Sorry.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (May 14, 2015)

TheRuralWolfDog said:


> I'm not going to argue. However if you lived in my small town. You'd feel the same.
> 
> Hobby....The Fandom yes. The fursona...Did you read I am a Therian?
> 
> ...



I'm sure you'll do just that.


----------



## TheRuralWolfDog (May 14, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> I'm sure you'll do just that.



And your problem with that is? I don't get what is so different with coming out as a Furry or as being Gay....
Both are life changing for you and those around you. Both can be difficult for others to accept.

While other differences are present I don't get it. So I won't even try. I will say way to act to someone that JUST signed up. Yeah mature.


----------



## Butters Shikkon (May 15, 2015)

TheRuralWolfDog said:


> And your problem with that is? I don't get what is so different with coming out as a Furry or as being Gay....
> Both are life changing for you and those around you. Both can be difficult for others to accept.
> 
> While other differences are present I don't get it. So I won't even try. I will say way to act to someone that JUST signed up. Yeah mature.



You are really embarrassing yourself in ways you didn't even think of. Gays and transgender people are actually oppressed and experience hardships in most areas of the nation/ world. Furries are just considered dorky. 

If you aren't just a random troll you should really think of apologizing to the people you just disrespected in your arrogance.


----------



## Astrium (May 15, 2015)

TheRuralWolfDog said:


> And your problem with that is? I don't get what is so different with coming out as a Furry or as being Gay....
> Both are life changing for you and those around you. Both can be difficult for others to accept.
> 
> While other differences are present I don't get it. So I won't even try. I will say way to act to someone that JUST signed up. Yeah mature.



Here's the thing, assuming you're actually not a troll: we get this "coming out as a furry" shit every few weeks and it's the same goddamn sob story every time. Nobody gives a fuck about you being a furry. Nobody. It's like saying you have to "come out" to people about playing video games, or building model cars, or whatever the hell. There is not a single person that has two fucks to rub together about what you do in your spare time.

And in response to your earlier statement, I live in Bumblefuck Nowhere, West Virginia. I am from a small town.


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## TheRuralWolfDog (May 15, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> You are really embarrassing yourself in ways you didn't even think of. Gays and transgender people are actually oppressed and experience hardships in most areas of the nation/ world. Furries are just considered dorky.
> 
> If you aren't just a random troll you should really think of apologizing to the people you just disrespected in your arrogance.



Why would I apologize. While I agree nations that kill or say people that are gay should have less rights is totally insane!
I have family that is gay. There is more to someone that is gay then their sexual preference. Furries are considered to be MUCH more than "dorky". Ever seen CSI? Even outside of that, most see it as weird. But my point wasn't to compare really gays to furries. But say that coming out no matter what the reason is tricky.

As far as gay people. I know they are born that way. There is also no reason they can't be with who they want to be with. So I wasn't even talking about that. But I'm dropping out of this topic. So as not to "embarrass" myself any further. 

Lastly random Troll. Really. Why would I come on here post what I did, say what I said if my goal was simply to cause conflict. 

But you know what I can tell from the hostility I've seen in other threads this forum in general may not be for me.

You are not the gatekeeper for all gays or furries. So take a step back please and try to offer advise vs berate someone because their ideology is different.

Thank you and Good night.


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## Saiko (May 15, 2015)

You'll want to distinguish between coming out as furry and coming out as therian.


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## Sylox (May 15, 2015)

#ragequit


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## TheRuralWolfDog (May 15, 2015)

Astrium said:


> Here's the thing, assuming you're actually not a troll: we get this "coming out as a furry" shit every few weeks and it's the same goddamn sob story every time. Nobody gives a fuck about you being a furry. Nobody. It's like saying you have to "come out" to people about playing video games, or building model cars, or whatever the hell. There is not a single person that has two fucks to rub together about what you do in your spare time.
> 
> And in response to your earlier statement, I live in Bumblefuck Nowhere, West Virginia. I am from a small town.



I will answer you then I am done. 

One I am not a troll as I said in my previous post.
Two I don't care if someone else posts here saying what I said. I didn't see it nor did I say it. So take your hostility elsewhere.

How can you compare building model airplanes, racing RC cars or playing video games to being a Furry??

Yes people care if youre a furry. People are freaking nosy and want to know everything.

I will end here with this. I've been a Furry for a very short time. I've met NOTHING but open arms from Gays, Bi's, Straights, Therians, what have you....If I had come here FIRST before speaking to them I probably would have never became a Furry. It ISN'T the outsiders, TV or social media that gives the furries the bad name as much as you all. Bitter and stuck in this forum, of which the sole goal is to beat the S*** out of someone. So I'm done. I've been down this road before and it never ends well. So you all can continue to insult and do whatever you do here. But stop and consider sometime that others, that are still learning their way might need a hand. Keep this in mind, someday you too will need a hand. Would you want the same recourse?


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## Sylox (May 15, 2015)

Dude, nobody gives a fuck that you enjoy fapping to Krystal or dressing up as a cat on Saturday...NOBODY. You aren't special, okay; your story doesn't make you unique. Oohhh woe is me nobody understands me because I am a furry. Grow the fuck up and get overyourself. 

Take your internal bullshit to Tumblr if you want to engage in a special snowflake circle jerk, but don't put it on here and expect people to fall head over heels and feel sorry for you.


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## Swoocerini (May 15, 2015)

@TheRuralWolfDog (yes, I failed to click the reply button)

Being a furry can be a very important aspect to your life and hey, I can understand that. But, 'coming out' as a furry on this forum is infamous because it has appeared as a discussion many times, and often ends in an argument (much like we have going on now). In my opinion, being a furry doesn't warrant 'coming out', but that is my perspective on the fandom: if it means more to you, there's nothing wrong with that. I think what people wish to say is that being 'furry' does not have the same issue being part of the LGBT+ community has; i.e. a history of abuse within society that has caused prosecution and death at its worse - not to say the furry fandom has not received backlashes for its existence, but perhaps not to the extent something that the LGBT+ community has faced.

You're right about nosiness: people may ask you if you're a furry, and that can create some anxiety and awkwardness, so yes; people do 'care' in a way. But, as you said, it's nosiness; out of human curiosity, which is genuinely only selfishness on their part. I can only suggest that you take your connection with the furry fandom as something close to your heart, but maybe not something you need to 'come out' in reality as.


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## LazerMaster5 (May 15, 2015)

Remember, being a furry is not a big deal unless you make it one.


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## Kenric_Finlay (May 20, 2015)

Would you all make a new thread for this discussion? It's a support thread not a place for agruing! 

Imagine if you had a therapist and came in for an appointment one day and they were yelling at someone over if your problem was really a problem at all.


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## Spatel (May 21, 2015)

Astrium said:


> No. Stop it. You don't need to "come out" as a furry. It's a hobby.



"It's a hobby, just like fapping to model trains"!


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## LazerMaster5 (May 22, 2015)

Spatel said:


> "It's a hobby, just like fapping to model trains"!


I like trains. *gets hit by train*


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## Saiko (May 22, 2015)

In other news, my dad apparently has reached the stage where he sees a random girl with green hair at Cups and tells my mom she'd be a good girl for me. XD


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## Butters Shikkon (May 22, 2015)

Saiko said:


> In other news, my dad apparently has reached the stage where he sees a random girl with green hair at Cups and tells my mom she'd be a good girl for me. XD



 Denile ain't just a river in Egypt.


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## Prism (May 22, 2015)

I think my coming out to my mom was when I was in 6th or 7th grade and I was 12 or 13, we were driving home from an after school thing and I turned to her and said "You know.. I don't think it's wrong to go out with a girl if you really like each other. I'd probably do it." This was during a point in time where I had my first crush on a girl that I knew was bi. This has evolved over the years to me becoming Pansexual and just in general not attaching gender/sex to love. I said I was bisexual for probably about 5-6 years before I realized there was a word for not caring about what your partner identifies as or has in their pants.


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## HaloTennis (May 22, 2015)

Sylox said:


> Dude, nobody gives a fuck that you enjoy fapping to Krystal or dressing up as a cat on Saturday...NOBODY. You aren't special, okay; your story doesn't make you unique. Oohhh woe is me nobody understands me because I am a furry. Grow the fuck up and get overyourself.
> 
> Take your internal bullshit to Tumblr if you want to engage in a special snowflake circle jerk, but don't put it on here and expect people to fall head over heels and feel sorry for you.



Good God, Sylox! What the hell?! Chill out a bit. Some people live in areas that make even saying you're different impossible. That makes coming out as a furry a trillion times more difficult and those furries definitely need our support, not a bunch of bullshit. Take your hostility somewhere else and back the fuck off.


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## Butters Shikkon (May 22, 2015)

HaloTennis said:


> Good God, Sylox! What the hell?! Chill out a bit. Some people live in areas that make even saying you're different impossible. That makes coming out as a furry a trillion times more difficult and those furries definitely need our support, not a bunch of bullshit. Take your hostility somewhere else and back the fuck off.



You seem to keep missing this. https://forums.furaffinity.net/threads/705632-PSA-About-quot-coming-out-quot-as-a-furry

Swallow your pride and give it a read.


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## HaloTennis (May 22, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> You seem to keep missing this. https://forums.furaffinity.net/threads/705632-PSA-About-quot-coming-out-quot-as-a-furry
> 
> Swallow your pride and give it a read.



I read it already. But how is wanting to help someone else prideful? I think we need to be supportive, not condescending.


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## Butters Shikkon (May 22, 2015)

HaloTennis said:


> I read it already. But how is wanting to help someone else prideful? I think we need to be supportive, not condescending.



Yes, for all you fursuiters who have to hide who you are from the furrybashers and 4chan and how your mild interest in anthropomorphic animal cartoons keeps you so oppressed. You poor babies need support in the gay thread somehow. 

Halo, you are so up your own ass it's truly outrageous.


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## HaloTennis (May 22, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> Yes, for all you fursuiters who have to hide who you are from the furrybashers and 4chan and how your mild interest in anthropomorphic animal cartoons keeps you so oppressed. You poor babies need support in the gay thread somehow.
> 
> Halo, you are so up your own ass it's truly outrageous.



Uh I've told quite a few people I'm a Furry including my mom, and I'm straight, so I don't know what you're getting at. I'm supporting someone else, not myself. I don't care what people think of me. If they cast me out for being a Furry, then screw them. But if someone else is hurting, then we should be there for them. That's common sense.


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## Butters Shikkon (May 22, 2015)

HaloTennis said:


> Uh I've told quite a few people I'm a Furry including my mom, and I'm straight, so I don't know what you're getting at. I'm supporting someone else, not myself. I don't care what people think of me. If they cast me out for being a Furry, then screw them. But if someone else is hurting, then we should be there for them. That's common sense.



You were arguing with an old post from Sylox. Look, your furry coming out thread got locked. Don't bring your shit into this one. 

Keep your posts on topic from here on out. This is a support thread for LGBT folk. Not furries. Taralack locked yours. Get over it.


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## HaloTennis (May 22, 2015)

Yeah I still don't understand why it got locked, but whatever. Taralock referred me to this one when he locked it, so I assumed this was the same topic.


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## HaloTennis (May 22, 2015)

And I don't base my life on what moderators do with my threads and posts, either.


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## Saiko (May 22, 2015)

No! Shoo! Keep it out of the coming out thread! This is specifically for sexuality. *swats all of you with a broom*


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## HaloTennis (May 22, 2015)

Alright well I didn't know that. I do apologize for going off-topic. All I can say for coming out in a sexuality sense is to be brave, and your parents should always accept you for who you are even if nobody else does. They're supposed to be there for you, and if they're not, there's still a huge group out there who will be. 

Lol I suppose my advice for coming out as a Furry holds true for sexuality too


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## Spatel (May 22, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> You seem to keep missing this. https://forums.furaffinity.net/threads/705632-PSA-About-quot-coming-out-quot-as-a-furry
> 
> Swallow your pride and give it a read.



Yeah that's a really crap thread honestly... considering how many people think furries are zoophiles, the furries who just walk around with a cavalier attitude pretending nobody cares are about as delusional in my mind as the guy who told his parents that he was a wolf spirit stuck in a human body.

But anyway... thread's not about that... moving on...

I've been out as bi for several years, and I find myself having to remind people every few months still that yeah, I'm still bi. No... I didn't pick a side. No... I don't lean one way. No, I probably won't pick a side. It gets irritating. What's most annoying though is that the amount of erasure bisexuals deal with is just as strong in the fandom. Like... there are more bisexuals than gays, and on some surveys more bisexuals than straight furries, yet a ton of people still ignore us--even when they're surrounded by us!


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## Kosdu (May 22, 2015)

Spatel said:


> Yeah that's a really crap thread honestly... considering how many people think furries are zoophiles, the furries who just walk around with a cavalier attitude pretending nobody cares are about as delusional in my mind as the guy who told his parents that he was a wolf spirit stuck in a human body.
> 
> But anyway... thread's not about that... moving on...
> 
> I've been out as bi for several years, and I find myself having to remind people every few months still that yeah, I'm still bi. No... I didn't pick a side. No... I don't lean one way. No, I probably won't pick a side. It gets irritating. What's most annoying though is that the amount of erasure bisexuals deal with is just as strong in the fandom. Like... there are more bisexuals than gays, and on some surveys more bisexuals than straight furries, yet a ton of people still ignore us--even when they're surrounded by us!





People tend to naturally assume others are like them, and it can be hard for them to remember folks aren't always.


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## Spatel (May 23, 2015)

Kosdu said:


> People tend to naturally assume others are like them, and it can be hard for them to remember folks aren't always.



This effect is not necessarily malicious. However, I should mention I'm 28, and it gets tiring after a certain amount of time. There is no point in life where people stop doing this, no matter how blunt and deliberate you are about defining yourself.


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## Dizzie (May 27, 2015)

Just lost my best friend yesterday because he found out I was bi.  Idk if it was wise for him to know but feeling really hurt after knowing him for years


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## Butters Shikkon (May 27, 2015)

Dizzie said:


> Just lost my best friend yesterday because he found out I was bi.  Idk if it was wise for him to know but feeling really hurt after knowing him for years



Well, it's absolutely not wrong for you to be bi. In fact, it's wonderful. If he cannot be there for you and accept who you are due to his own prejudice, you are better off without him. 

Friends are there for you no matter what. Hang in there.


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## Astrium (May 27, 2015)

Dizzie said:


> Just lost my best friend yesterday because he found out I was bi.  Idk if it was wise for him to know but feeling really hurt after knowing him for years



Damn, that's tough. Why'd he leave you? Really religious, just didn't like LGBT people, or something more specific? We're here if you want to talk.


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## Dizzie (May 27, 2015)

Its not some random person that I thought was a friend.  I had a lot of serious trust issues with plenty of people.  He was the only one I trust and has help me through hard times both financially and mentally.  I couldn't help that he meant more to me than anyone else in my life.  I felt I had to tell him the truth.


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## Butters Shikkon (May 27, 2015)

Dizzie said:


> Its not some random person that I thought was a friend.  I had a lot of serious trust issues with plenty of people.  He was the only one I trust and has help me through hard times both financially and mentally.  I couldn't help that he meant more to me than anyone else in my life.  I felt I had to tell him the truth.



I know that feel...I have had a friend who I've known for years who I considered like family recently tell me she didn't approve of "my lifestyle". (Which would explain why she didn't like me and my bf kissing shirtless on a summer day's hike but...fuck it, that was hella hot.) It's made super awkward because my brother always wants her around. But I can't stand to see her bitch face anymore. 

To be honest, you're gonna have this happen to you all your life. It's shitty, it's heartbreaking and it's not fair. But that's life. You must come to realize that you can do better than such people, and that negativity has no place in your life.


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## Dizzie (May 27, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> I know that feel...I have had a friend who I've known for years who I considered like family recently tell me she didn't approve of "my lifestyle". (Which would explain why she didn't like me and my bf kissing shirtless on a summer day's hike but...fuck it, that was hella hot.) It's made super awkward because my brother always wants her around. But I can't stand to see her bitch face anymore.
> 
> To be honest, you're gonna have this happen to you all your life. It's shitty, it's heartbreaking and it's not fair. But that's life. You must come to realize that you can do better than such people, and that negativity has no place in your life.



I know, its just not easy especially since I feel I have no one to really talk to about this irl.  I haven't been really BI for years in fact its only been for like a year.  I don't think I'm as good as handling this as others who's been BI or gay for years.


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## Astrium (May 27, 2015)

Dizzie said:


> I know, its just not easy especially since I feel I have no one to really talk to about this irl.  I haven't been really BI for years in fact its only been for like a year.  I don't think I'm as good as handling this as others who's been BI or gay for years.



I've been bi for years but I only really only admitted it to myself last year. Trust me, the transition can be pretty rough. I'm still figuring things out myself. As far as I can tell there's a sort of a process to it.

Step 1: Wing it.
Step 2: There is no Step 2.

But there's a lot of people hanging around the forums that've been doing this kinda thing for years. If you ever need advice about it, just ask. Most of us don't bite, promise (unless you're into that sort of thing).


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## Butters Shikkon (May 27, 2015)

Dizzie said:


> I know, its just not easy especially since I feel I have no one to really talk to about this irl.  I haven't been really BI for years in fact its only been for like a year.  I don't think I'm as good as handling this as others who's been BI or gay for years.



Oh, its always hard when you are...well, kinda betrayed. It's never easy. But you'll make new friends, trust me. And then you will be happy again.


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## Dizzie (May 27, 2015)

If it wasn't for this person, I wouldn't had a home or a job.  He seriously got me out of the gutter.  Even in that intense moment when he found out and had a heated argument with me, he has never insulted me or called me anything derogatory.  I don't expect him to change but I'm hopeful at the very least my friendship with him could be savaged.


----------



## AnthonyStark (May 27, 2015)

My coming out story is way too much because I still have no idea what I am gender wise, but sexuality, yes. I identify as bi-sexual (will date transfolk as well), and I am currently genderless. 

After a few years of research and actually looking into things, I decided I was FTM. I came out in 2011 via a Facebook note, which was really fucking stupid lmao, but I can't handle physical confrontation whatsoever. My mother, of course, was completely against it and came up with any idea she could to say I was not trans. I rebelled a lot, being 15, shaved my head, wore "male" clothes, and eventually started binding with an Ace bandage (do NOT do). I joined a support group online called Laura's Playground and got plenty of advice and support from transfolk who have been this way for decades. 

In 2013, I saw a gender therapist, who confirmed my GID (gender identity disorder) and after about four months of seeing her, gave me my letter to start hormone treatments. I was looking for an endocrinologist in Arizona and my family doctor was trying to see how she could start me on testosterone. Nothing was happening and we eventually moved to Texas, where we had to live with my grandparents for six months. Cue oppression and my grandmother trying to get me to go to church. They used my birth name and the wrong pronouns in hopes it would change me back to "normal". I tried looking for an endo here in Texas, but the closest ones were up north, and I live in the Coastal Bend. There would be no way I could get up there for treatment.

My mum started accepting and supporting me in 2013, after a couple years of me forcing her to stop being a bitch. 

Having a job in Texas and being trans was the most complicated thing ever. I was harassed at my job so much, bullied, and people wrote false reports about me, that eventually I just quit.

2014 rolls around and I have been living full time male since 2011.

Sometime in June, I started associating myself less and less with being transgender. I did keep wearing my packer and binder, though. I got a job at this cafeteria called Luby's, where I started going by my legal name and female pronouns. It bothered me at first, but eventually I just went with it.

I didn't feel male or female, so I started identifying with genderless, which I still identify with today. 

I am dating a straight male and I believe that if he were to leave me or I leave him, I'd go back to being transgender. He knows I used to identify as transgender and is okay with it, but if I ever went back to it, I know he'd leave me.

I still prefer being seen as a male online, but in real life, I don't care what gender pronouns you use with me, as long as it is he/him/his, she/her/her's, or they/them/their's. None of that other crap.

-------------------------

Sexuality wise, I came out as bisexual to my mum when I was 14, but she told me I didn't know what I wanted and she said I told her I was lesbian at one point, which I never did.

I oppressed liking females for a long time (up until last year) and identified solely as a gay male. 
With my mother becoming more accepting and more self-discovery, I allowed myself to be bi-sexual again.

So as it stands, I have no fucking idea what I am, but I identify as a genderless bi-sexual.


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## Furtaku (May 30, 2015)

Coming out, eh? It's tempted me in the past, but I've always kept my sexuality (bi) and other stuff hidden.
I can't be arsed with the inevitable crap I'd be put through by any dickish people who find out.


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## MalletFace (Jun 1, 2015)

I guess I'll just come here to let out a little steam, and it will probably end more like a rant than it started.

I've known I was gay since I was in elementary school. My parents could basically tell then, too, but I haven't actually told them yet. In middle school, other students and the teachers could probably tell that I was, too. I didn't frequently get bullied, but one teacher never cut me any slack on work and a student stole my work because of it. I've developed a phobia of turning in work for fear of it not being good enough or another student stealing it because of those two pricks. Since then, I've also had panic attacks, ulcers, and hemorrhoids on a constant basis.

The first person I told was a friend. She's totally amazing and she basically sat there and hugged me for a few minutes. I hate hugs so I don't know what she was going for there. I then told my girlfriend. Things ended _okay_ with her. She went on to tell a bunch of people, though I don't even know several of them, so I still talk to her and hang out with her. I told several other friends about it after that, including two Christians of very stereotypically bigoted denominations (Evangelical Baptist and Jehovah's Witness). Surprisingly, they both took it well and came out to me too. Those were actually the most awkward times because I was more prepared for a canonical rant rather than an "I'm actually bi" or an "I'm gay, too."

After all that, though, I'm not sure if and when I'm going to let my family know. It almost feels like it has been too good so far and if I tell them, the worst could happen.

I'm also afraid of it getting to my principal. She's fairly homophobic and if she does anything to me (like finding the smallest reasons to damage my record or to expel me) I could do almost nothing about it because of how my state's laws work and how they don't respect federal laws. If she does expel me, she's basically cost me my high school diploma, as it was college classes giving me high school credit, and any chance of getting accepted into a local university, as I will have been labeled as a college dropout, I will have been expelled from high school, and it would destroy my GPA if it was during a semester with more than one college class. Beyond that, if I take it to a local court, I could get lucky and they see that as discrimination under federal law, or they could be assholes and try and tag me with one of the few anti-homosexual charges that my state, city, and county could have. That would be a great way for my senior year (or super-senior year, we have five years instead of four) to go, ending with a record for absolutely nothing.

I've also got to look out for anti-homosexual hate-crimes around here. I happen to live in one of the worst areas for that in my state. I'm looking at a map of crimes here right now, and there have been hate-crimes against people who identify as LGBQT ranging from harassment to assault, and even a murder in recent history. There are even a few hate-crimes against asexuals. I actually live within 30 minutes of my state's main anti-LGBQT organization's headquarters.

I'm so glad I chose to be gay.


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## BlitzCo (Jun 1, 2015)

I'm not sure if my advice would work well when it comes to stopping hate-crimes assaults.


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 1, 2015)

Theodore Roosevelt said it himself. "Speak softly and carry a big stick." It probably doesn't hurt to wear heavy metal shirts either, if you are a metalhead. Trying to pick a fight with a Slayer fan is a terrible idea.


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## Astrium (Jun 1, 2015)

Just gonna leave this here...


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## BlitzCo (Jun 1, 2015)

LazerMaster5 said:


> Trying to pick a fight with a Slayer fan is a terrible idea.



I would think that a Browning Hi-Power would stop homophobic hate crimes more than a piece of fabric that you wear on your chest.


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 1, 2015)

BlitzCo said:


> I would think that a Browning Hi-Power would stop homophobic hate crimes more than a piece of fabric that you wear on your chest.


I didn't say don't cary a big stick. I just said being a metalhead helps. Are you more likely to mess with the skinny dude with designer brands or the stocky dude with a denim jacket covered in patches for bands like Slayer and Exodus?


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## BlitzCo (Jun 1, 2015)

LazerMaster5 said:


> I didn't say don't cary a big stick. I just said being a metalhead helps. Are you more likely to mess with the skinny dude with designer brands or the stocky dude with a denim jacket covered in patches for bands like Slayer and Exodus?



Being a metalhead doesn't really change anything. Almost everybody will pick on the first guy. Because of his body size, not because of the clothes he wears. 

Lets change the senerio, would you rather mess with the skinny dude wearing a Megadeath shirt, or the muscular guy wearing a Coldplay shirt?


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## Astrium (Jun 1, 2015)

BlitzCo said:


> Being a metalhead doesn't really change anything. Almost everybody will pick on the first guy. Because of his body size, not because of the clothes he wears.
> 
> Lets change the senerio, would you rather mess with the skinny dude wearing a Megadeath shirt, or the muscular guy wearing a Coldplay shirt?



Don't fuck with skinny dudes unless you want an elbow in your face. That shit hurts.


----------



## Spatel (Jun 2, 2015)

BlitzCo said:


> Being a metalhead doesn't really change anything. Almost everybody will pick on the first guy. Because of his body size, not because of the clothes he wears.
> 
> Lets change the senerio, would you rather mess with the skinny dude wearing a Megadeath shirt, or the muscular guy wearing a Coldplay shirt?



I wouldn't mess with either of them because I'm not an ass. However, I would struggle to contain my laughter around a muscular dude with a Coldplay shirt.


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## BlitzCo (Jun 2, 2015)

I still wouldn't want to piss him off.


----------



## Kalmor (Jun 3, 2015)

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6782680/

A couple of years back, my older half brother came out as being gay. From my understanding of the situation, it didn't go down very well to say the least with my dad (who isn't said brother's biological father, I might add). After A year or so, my dad finally came round a bit and started being less of a dick to him.. While he was in his presence at least anyway.

Once my brother moved out, my dad started saying things about him behind his back. One such recent example is that when I told him that my brother followed me on twitter, he replied with something along the lines of "Why? He just posts his gayboy stuff". I really wanted to burst out in rage at him at this point but just decided to shrug and quickly divert the topic away from him. It's so weird though. He tries to act as if he's ok with LGBT folk but then blurts out something like that. It's gotten to the point where I actually feel anxious whenever something to do with LGBT rights or people comes up on the TV while he's in the room.Even in games... In the Witcher 3 there's (early game spoiler) an LGBT questgiver NPC that mentions their homosexual relations. My dad's reaction was "bloody gays getting everywhere these days".

This of course puts me in a very awkward position. I'm still closeted bi and I am his eldest biological son. When I do eventually come out, I fear it will cause a shitstorm of epic proportions with him. Apart from his homophobia, he's genuinely a good guy in all other respects and I don't think he's a bad dad by any means... But I believe he expects grandchildren out of me and a "normal" heterosexual relationship - which still has a chance of happening, don't get me wrong. One of the perks of being bi. :V

I fear he'll say and think the same things behind my back like he does with my brother... I'd rather not feel incredibly awkward and on edge while talking to him at any point after my coming out, but that is what will probably happen... I hate it so much....

My mother on the other hand has always been supportive of my brother and his sexuality. She's an amazing woman, despite her annoyingannoying nagging and habits, but people tell me that's a motherly thing. :V

I go to uni in September of next year, hopefully. Hopefully then my dear SO can visit and see how that goes... If well, I'll come out. If not, I'll wait until it becomes relevant again through another same sex relationship. I can't and won't do it face to face.... That's very prone to irrational and instinctual reactions... My brother definitely learned that the hard way... I'll Probably do it by an indirect method, something like a long form letter. I just don't want this to be a huge conflict....


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## Ratical (Jun 5, 2015)

Kalmor said:


> My mother on the other hand has always been supportive of my brother and his sexuality. She's an amazing woman, despite her annoyingannoying nagging and habits, but people tell me that's a motherly thing. :V



It's how she shows her love for you. It'd be one thing if she was a bad person and a nag, but if she supports your brother she's probably just being being protective. Still annoying, but probably tolerable. 

Your dad... agh. I wish I knew what to say. It's like... you want to do right by them, and be the son they want, but that's just not the way things are. You also don't want your family to fracture and, even worse, you be the cause. You can gauge the situation better than anyone else, so hopefully you'll know what's best when the time comes. If a conflict does happen, keep all your supporters very close. Please also let your brother know you're there for him to, if you haven't already.


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## monochromatic-dragon (Jun 7, 2015)

I'm straight... I'm straight... I'm straight... wait, am I straight? Aw shit, I'm fuckin queer. 

^basically my life over the past month or so. I've come to the realization that I am actually genderqueer. I grew up as a "tomboy" I guess you would call it, venomously opposed to anything that was too "girly". I refused to wear dresses, skirts, and even gene pants (I wore cloth pants for the LONGEST ass time, until about 4th grade) I've had crushes on girls since I was 6 years old. 

But I guess my childhood doesn't matter. What matters is that sometimes I feel male, and other times I feel female. Sometimes I feel a little bit in between. I think my "maleness" can account for the fact that I'm bi-romantic (but not bi-sexual) I tend to feel more romantic towards women during my "male" periods. I like to dress in a way that reflects both genders, but I don't try to change my body (aside from hiding my "curves" underneath baggy clothing, and stuff like that) I actually love my body the way it is, besides maybe my breasts, but I feel like breast reduction surgery would be a little too extreme. 

I haven't come out to anyone besides to people online. Personally, I can't think of any good reason to "come out" as this, as it doesn't really change how I feel about myself or how others perceive me. I still want to keep my same name, the same pronouns that have always been used for me. I think it would be an inopportune time to come out, because people might just assume that I'm getting wrapped up in the Caitlin Jenner news or whatever. I'm gonna wait until the end of the summer maybe, and come out to my best friend. Of all my friends, she understands issues of gender and sexuality the most.


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## Ratical (Jun 7, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> But I guess my childhood doesn't matter. What matters is that sometimes I feel male, and other times I feel female. Sometimes I feel a little bit in between.



Well, we're all a bit male and female, psychologically speaking, and I think your fluctuating identity is called "genderfluid", which sounds like some kinda lubricant, but trust me it's a thing. I've also heard other bi-persons talk about how they "flip" from one partner preference to another periodically, so you're certainly not alone there either. I'm glad you have someone you think you can talk to. I really admire that strength. If you could share some with me that'd be wonderful. 

I'm not trying to armchair counsel this thread or anything, I've just been through enough group sessions with this sorta thing that I feel like I gotta say something.


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 7, 2015)

All I know is that my closet has WiFi.


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## MalletFace (Jun 8, 2015)

LazerMaster5 said:


> All I know is that my closet has WiFi.



My closet has a warning that you are standing directly above a water heater.


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 8, 2015)

MalletFace said:


> My closet has a warning that you are standing directly above a water heater.


No wonder you got out of it.


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## Sylox (Jun 8, 2015)

(deleted for stupidity)


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 8, 2015)

Hey, Sylox, this is the coming out as LGBT thread. The "coming out as furry" thread is in the Community Discussion area.


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## Sylox (Jun 8, 2015)

...fuck!


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## Plash (Jun 8, 2015)

To be honest I think I was under the same impression as Sylox to begin with.


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## Astrium (Jun 8, 2015)

Sylox said:


> (deleted for stupidity)



Does anyone else really want to know what was in this post now?


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 8, 2015)

Astrium said:


> Does anyone else really want to know what was in this post now?


His friend found him looking at furry pictures or something. The details are unclear, as my short-term memory sucks.


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## Ratical (Jun 8, 2015)

LazerMaster5 said:


> His friend found him looking at furry pictures or something. The details are unclear, as my short-term memory sucks.



Well, I guess being forced out of the closet (the furry one or the gay one) has it's perks. Yeah, it's awkward, but if you were hesitating on doing it yourself than the decision has now been made for you. Probably not the best way, but maybe you can salvage it.


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## -Sliqq- (Jun 8, 2015)

Sylox said:


> ...fuck!



>Failcity
>DAMN SON
>'Oh you almost had it'


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## BlitzCo (Jun 9, 2015)

I never gotten why some LGBT people want to come out of the closet in very homophobic environments (like in many schools). If I was gay, I would want to stay in the closet until I know that I won't have any negative reactions to it.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jun 9, 2015)

BlitzCo said:


> I never gotten why some LGBT people want to come out of the closet in very homophobic environments (like in many schools). If I was gay, I would want to stay in the closet until I know that I won't have any negative reactions to it.



It'd be super nice if people wouldn't be so discriminatory and/or abusive to them though. It's still around in 2015 and its an embarrassment.


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## Kosdu (Jun 9, 2015)

BlitzCo said:


> I never gotten why some LGBT people want to come out of the closet in very homophobic environments (like in many schools). If I was gay, I would want to stay in the closet until I know that I won't have any negative reactions to it.



It's because being in the closet hurts.


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## BlitzCo (Jun 9, 2015)

Butters Shikkon said:


> It'd be super nice if people wouldn't be so *discriminatory and/or abusive* to them though. It's still around in 2015 and its an embarrassment.



There's no quick fix to that.


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## monochromatic-dragon (Jun 9, 2015)

Ratical said:


> Well, we're all a bit male and female, psychologically speaking, and I think your fluctuating identity is called "genderfluid", which sounds like some kinda lubricant, but trust me it's a thing. I've also heard other bi-persons talk about how they "flip" from one partner preference to another periodically, so you're certainly not alone there either. I'm glad you have someone you think you can talk to. I really admire that strength. If you could share some with me that'd be wonderful.



Well, I think the reason that I can be so strong is because this identity doesn't really change a thing about how I've already been living my life. I don't really have to come out to anyone, since it wont' affect me much other than having a more masculine outward appearance some days and a more feminine one the next. I can always just explain to my parents that men's clothes are more comfortable (they are, and often times more well-made) 

I'm not brave, I just got off easy.


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## Kinharia (Jun 9, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> Well, I think the reason that I can be so strong is because this identity doesn't really change a thing about how I've already been living my life. I don't really have to come out to anyone, since it wont' affect me much other than having a more masculine outward appearance some days and a more feminine one the next. I can always just explain to my parents that men's clothes are more comfortable (they are, and often times more well-made)
> 
> I'm not brave, I just got off easy.



Being born Male and genderfluid makes crossdressing just that tiny bit harder ^_^ People would look at me funny in womans clothing.


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## Astrium (Jun 9, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> Well, I think the reason that I can be so strong is because this identity doesn't really change a thing about how I've already been living my life. I don't really have to come out to anyone, since it wont' affect me much other than having a more masculine outward appearance some days and a more feminine one the next. I can always just explain to my parents that men's clothes are more comfortable (they are, and often times more well-made)
> 
> I'm not brave, I just got off easy.



Plus, men's clothing has standardized sizes.


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## Kalmor (Jun 9, 2015)

Ratical said:


> Your dad... agh. I wish I knew what to say. It's like... you want to do right by them, and be the son they want, but that's just not the way things are. You also don't want your family to fracture and, even worse, you be the cause. You can gauge the situation better than anyone else, so hopefully you'll know what's best when the time comes. If a conflict does happen, keep all your supporters very close. Please also let your brother know you're there for him to, if you haven't already.


Yeah. What happens will happen, just gotta do the damage control if it gets out of hand I guess.


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## Astrium (Jun 9, 2015)

So I came out to my mom as bisexual in the car tonight... She says she's processing, fingers crossed everything goes okay.


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 9, 2015)

I should probably come out as bi at one point or another. I have to wait until the time is right. I don't need it to be some huge dramatic talk, as I hate those. I don't want to be seen as any less of a human being because of my sexuality. I don't need to be considered "normal", but I also don't want to be considered a freak or an attention whore. Yeah, my dad is fairly liberal, but after the last visit to Grandma's house, I am not so sure I can trust him with this knowledge.


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## MalletFace (Jun 9, 2015)

LazerMaster5 said:


> I should probably come out as bi at one point or another. I have to wait until the time is right. I don't need it to be some huge dramatic talk, as I hate those. I don't want to be seen as any less of a human being because of my sexuality. I don't need to be considered "normal", but I also don't want to be considered a freak or an attention whore. Yeah, my dad is fairly liberal, but after the last visit to Grandma's house, I am not so sure I can trust him with this knowledge.



I've basically told myself that, but it took me years to come out to a few people. I basically used it as an excuse.

"Shoot, she had a fight. Best law low."
"Dangit, she's got the sniffles. Best lay low."
"Dadgum, she ran out of onions. Best lay low."

I still use it as an excuse. I am too picky about it when it probably isn't a big deal for my family.

But this is a really complicated social issue that varies from person to person, and my advice of "don't worry yourself out of it" may not really hold any value to you.


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## Ratical (Jun 10, 2015)

Astrium said:


> So I came out to my mom as bisexual in the car tonight... She says she's processing, fingers crossed everything goes okay.



I'm pulling for you, Astrium. I know it's tough to hear, but if things get a little heated then know two things:

- The worst is always at the beginning
- Your mom still loves you. Don't hate her for taking time to think about this. Give her the benefit of the doubt and she'll be more willing to return the sentiment.

Stay strong!


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## Willow (Jun 10, 2015)

I accidentally came out to my grandpa as trans the other day. It was weird. 
He accepted it, but it was weird.


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## Ratical (Jun 10, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> I'm not brave, I just got off easy.



You are, dear. If you weren't, you'd run away from being genderqueer instead of accepting it, or let it nibble at you like ants on ice cream. I dunno why I used that metaphor, I must really want ice cream.

But yeah, girls _do_ have it easier than guys for stuff like this, I'm not gonna argue that, but you won a personal battle all the same.


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## Astrium (Jun 10, 2015)

So about 20 minutes ago my mom and I sat down and had a chat about my coming out yesterday. She asked me to explain how I know I'm bi. I don't think she entirely understands yet, but I'm sure she'll get there.


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## Butters Shikkon (Jun 10, 2015)

Astrium said:


> So about 20 minutes ago my mom and I sat down and had a chat about my coming out yesterday. She asked me to explain how I know I'm bi. I don't think she entirely understands yet, but I'm sure she'll get there.



"Well, Mom. When I see a man with a nice, tight ass or a ripped core, my brain sends a signal to engorge my penis with blood, resulting in an erection." 

There ya go.


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## Amiir (Jun 14, 2015)

Willow said:


> I accidentally came out to my grandpa as trans the other day. It was weird.
> He accepted it, but it was weird.



Why? How did it go exactly?


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## Caledonian (Jun 23, 2015)

I have absolutely no clue what my sexuality is.


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## BlitzCo (Jun 23, 2015)

then you must be bi then


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 23, 2015)

BlitzCo said:


> then you must be bi then


That's not how that works. That's not how any of this works.


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## Hunte_k (Jun 25, 2015)

hey


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## Llamapotamus (Jun 25, 2015)

Hunte_k said:


> hey



hi


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## Hewge (Jun 25, 2015)

Hunte_k said:


> hey





Llamapotamus said:


> hi



Yo


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 25, 2015)

Wassup dawg?


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## monochromatic-dragon (Jun 26, 2015)

So if I'm genderfluid, does that make me gay? I have a boyfriend. :U


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## LazerMaster5 (Jun 26, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> So if I'm genderfluid, does that make me gay? I have a boyfriend. :U


If your base gender is female, then you would most likely be straight.


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## monochromatic-dragon (Jun 26, 2015)

Okay. I figured. I wasn't sure if sexuality was based on gender or sex but I guess since it even has the word SEX in it it should have been obvious.


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## SodaBubbles (Jul 4, 2015)

Pansexual and poly here, and I already know I can't come out to my parents. They're viciously opposed to anything not hetero and monogamous. For varying reasons they're not in my life anymore anyway. The people who matter to me know, and living in the South makes "weirdness" like poly have to be tucked away. Shame, but it doesn't bother me terribly much. It used to, but as I got older I stopped worrying about it.


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## monochromatic-dragon (Jul 10, 2015)

I think "bigender" is a more accurate label for me than "genderfluid". Because I don't necessarily feel like my male and female sides "switch off", but they are just constant states of being. Not that labeling myself is all-important, now that I know what my gender situation is called I can move forward


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## Llamapotamus (Jul 11, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> I think "bigender" is a more accurate label for me than "genderfluid". Because I don't necessarily feel like my male and female sides "switch off", but they are just constant states of being. Not that labeling myself is all-important, now that I know what my gender situation is called I can move forward



"Are you a boy, or a girl?"

"....yes "


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## Ratical (Jul 11, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> now that I know what my gender situation is called I can move forward



Solid. Here's your flag.

You don't have to wear it or fly it or acknowledge it in any way, but there ya go. 

Gender's hard, but there's no alternative to being you.


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## Bangaroo (Jul 14, 2015)

I came out as gay in December officially, though my friends mostly already knew.

my biggest surprise has been the amount of people who told me they figured it out without me having to tell them!


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## Ratical (Jul 17, 2015)

Bangaroo said:


> I came out as gay in December officially, though my friends mostly already knew.
> 
> my biggest surprise has been the amount of people who told me they figured it out without me having to tell them!



That's always good. Having someone you can fall back on if things don't work out is probably for the best. Guess you weren't as good at concealing it as you thought, but that was just your true self wanting to get out. Great to hear. 

I have a suspicion my mom thinks I'm gay. I _never_ bring up my sexuality, but on the incredibly rare instances it became the topic on conversation, she just assumed I was asexual and I left it at that. But whenever I'm talking with her about something that's bothering me, she usually adds at the end "isn't there something else...?" and I'm just thinking "what else? What does she _think_ I wanna say?" It might just be me being paranoid, though. I love my mom to pieces, but...

Gah, I'm too old to be having issues like this, but it's how I've lived my life up 'til now and I guess I've just gotten used to it. It helps put the plight of trans people in perspective for me, though. They have to come out and change their appearance. I can't rightfully complain when they're going through so much more (and looking good at the same time ). Talk about humbling.


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## Taralack (Jul 17, 2015)

monochromatic-dragon said:


> I'm straight... I'm straight... I'm straight... wait, am I straight? Aw shit, I'm fuckin queer.
> 
> ^basically my life over the past month or so. I've come to the realization that I am actually genderqueer. I grew up as a "tomboy" I guess you would call it, venomously opposed to anything that was too "girly". I refused to wear dresses, skirts, and even gene pants (I wore cloth pants for the LONGEST ass time, until about 4th grade) I've had crushes on girls since I was 6 years old.
> 
> But I guess my childhood doesn't matter. What matters is that sometimes I feel male, and other times I feel female. Sometimes I feel a little bit in between. I think my "maleness" can account for the fact that I'm bi-romantic (but not bi-sexual) I tend to feel more romantic towards women during my "male" periods. I like to dress in a way that reflects both genders, but I don't try to change my body (aside from hiding my "curves" underneath baggy clothing, and stuff like that) I actually love my body the way it is, besides maybe my breasts, but I feel like breast reduction surgery would be a little too extreme.



Holy shit, this is basically me down to a T. I'm glad there's others who feel like I do. Gender is a complicated thing isn't it.

I don't really feel the need to "come out" so to speak, I'm already married and have been 100% upfront with my husband about my gender thoughts, and my family is... I guess while not openly or aggressively homophobic, they aren't exactly open minded either. Telling them about this is just going to complicate and confuse matters. They've already accepted me for being a tomboy anyway, so I don't really see the need to say anything.


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## TidesofFate (Jul 26, 2015)

I never feel the need to come out as asexual, but I often find myself having to say something else because I don't want to have to explain what an asexual is all the time.


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## monochromatic-dragon (Jul 27, 2015)

I found a cheap binder that I want to buy once I'm at school and away from home (even if it is only a temporary "away") I just really want to have it for certain days when I feel like presenting as male. c:


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## Anthropomorphic Human (Jul 29, 2015)

MalletFace said:


> I actually live within 30 minutes of my state's main anti-LGBQT organization's headquarters.



Sounds like it's time for a little ALLAHU AKBAR, eh?


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## LazerMaster5 (Jul 29, 2015)

Anthropomorphic Human said:


> Sounds like it's time for a little ALLAHU AKBAR, eh?


What, and have every single LGBT person get put on the government watch list? No thanks, the government invades our privacy enough already.


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## MalletFace (Jul 29, 2015)

Anthropomorphic Human said:


> Sounds like it's time for a little ALLAHU AKBAR, eh?



Maintaining hate and intolerance for people that loathe and disdain me is something I don't subscribe to. I see it as counter-productive and morally wrong.


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## Cocobanana (Jul 29, 2015)

My parents have known I'm gay for several years, and it wouldn't be too hard for anyone who did a little bit of internet research to find out as much, but the way I act and dress in public doesn't telegraph my sexuality. Have I not 'come out' unless I am open enough to tell even strangers that I'm into dudes sexually? Not that I'm purposefully trying to hide it (although it seems some bridges could be burned, given how more than half of Americans are religious in some way) but I don't make it as obvious as I could either right away.


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## Anthropomorphic Human (Jul 29, 2015)

I kid, I kid. No take seriously.


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## ShioBear (Jul 29, 2015)

Llamapotamus said:


> "Are you a boy, or a girl?"
> 
> "....yes "



same


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## Mike Lobo (Aug 23, 2015)

Welp, thought I was straight, turns out I'm bisexual.


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## LazerMaster5 (Aug 23, 2015)

I am a sexually confused teenager, not sure if bi or gay. Ah, the joy of growing up.


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## Llamapotamus (Aug 24, 2015)

Mike Lobo said:


> Welp, thought I was straight, turns out I'm bisexual.



right on


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