# Coming Out: The Thread



## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

Okay, it is no secret that there are a lot of gay, bisexual, and confused furries out there in the fandom.  This is a copypasta from yiffstar that I feel is one of the best and most helpful threads on there.  The only problem being that it requires you be 18+ and have 30 posts to see.  Now I know that people start having problems and questions much earlier than that.  I felt that this would be a good thread to have on FA as well.  I personally get messages from a lot of people questioning sexuality and how I dealt with it and asking for help with their confusion.  Now I know this forum is 13+ So I humbly ask that this thread stay clean and ask that it be taken seriously, that people stay on topic, and maybe we can do some good on this forum.

  This thread is for people to tell their stories, ask questions, get help and advise, and is here as a support system for those who need it. 

  Here is the opening article

*Do you think you might be gay?* 

Sorry to be so direct because I know that thinking about this question can be a bit of a frightener, especially if you've never said the answer out loud. So for the moment, just think the answer inside your head, if that makes it easier. One thing you'll notice is that it feels like a really big deal the first time, but the more you say it, the less difficult it becomes.

This coming-out business sometimes seems rather unfair. Straights don't have to do it, so why should we? Straight people just assume that everyone is straight. Then they get hitched, have children, go to McDonald's and eventually slip peacefully away surrounded by their grandchildren and great-grandchildren... without passing Go, without collecting Â£200 and, in most cases, without going to jail.

Being gay, however, is a minority pursuit. But don't ever forget that, while there may be more of them than us, it doesn't mean that being straight is 'normal'... it's just very common. So don't worry. Being a gay man or a lesbian (gay women get an extra name all to themselves!) or bisexual isn't good or bad, right or wrong. It just is. But it does mean we do have to go through the very inconvenient step of dealing with other people's ideas about what we're like. And mostly that involves them assuming that we're straight, which we're not. So we have to come out. And put them straight on the matter.

So are you gay? Now there are lots of answers you could give to that... like 'Maybe' or 'I fancy the boy who sits next to me' or 'Girls make me tingle' or 'The secretary of the golf club makes my putter rise' or 'I don't really know' or 'Definitely' or 'Can't wait to find out' or 'I'm terrified even thinking about it'... OK, you could choose one of those but let's try a tentative 'Yes'.

*feeling really bad?*

If you think you may be gay, it might really get you down. And you might feel very frightened and very alone because you don't know what it means and you're terrified of what other people might think.

I can't say, 'Don't worry,' because you already are worrying. But I can say that you really must try to talk to someone about it. You are not alone in what's going on in your head. Many gay people feel terrible before they come to terms with who they are. This is not because being gay is bad but because society has not always been kind to us and often hasn't made us feel very welcome. But other gay people will and so will many, many straight people. So please get some support.

If you just want to talk to another gay person, try ringing your local gay switchboard, which will be listed in the phonebook. And in help and info, there are the phone numbers of helplines where someone will be there for you, completely confidentially. Talk to them. Don't be beaten by these feelings of fear or depression. Try to believe in yourself enough to get to that phone and call someone. It'll be worth it.
maybe you're bisexualâ€¦

What if you don't feel gay but you don't feel straight either? What if you have that full-on stomach flutter for the prettiest girl in the class and the horniest man in the canteen... what if you want to be a tile on the wall of both the boys' and the girls' showers? Well, you may not be gay or straight, you may be both.

You will hear a lot of chat about teenagers 'going through a phase' and 'experimenting' before they settle down. Usually the people who talk like this expect that eventually you'll opt for Friday night takeaways, 2.4 kids and married bliss. Although sometimes the hipper among them accept cheerily that you might be gay and settle down to Friday night takeaways, 2.4 cats and unmarried bliss.

But bi-sexuals are often left feeling that they just aren't trying hard enough. That they should damn well make up their mind and fit neatly into a world of strict categories. But don't be pressurised into either camp by gays or straights if you feel you're bi.

And don't forget there's sex and then there's relationships. If you've decided at any particular time in your life that you've fallen for someone of the same sex and are going out with them, then the normal rules apply whether you're bi or gay. Be honest with them and be faithful. Most people feel that being faithful is better than playing around.

But sometimes there's added pressure for bi-sexuals. Some say that they feel a little strained because the 'other side' of their sexuality is unfulfilled. Well, a male friend of mine who now lives with a woman says he satisfies that by playing sport with other men and going to the gym. It may work for you. Like a lot of people, gay, straight or bi, window shopping is enough for him.

But bi-sexuals say the most common difficulty is when they are unable to be honest. Maybe you are going out with someone and you just can't tell them because you think they might feel hurt or undermined or just plain angry. Or you're single and everybody thinks you're straight. And so the temptation is to go off and have gay sex secretly â€“ meeting through phone lines, in loos, cruising resorts, pubs, clubs... wherever. No harm in that, except that secrecy can be a terrible burden. Also, if you're not owning up to having gay sex and you're doing it on the sly, sometimes that means you don't take enough care to be safe. Always take precautions.

Just one further thing, and this really does happen. Sometimes everybody thinks you're gay but you feel you'd like to get into a bit of straight sex. And the big fear is the gay gang you hang around with might not take it too well. Well, follow your heart! They'll catch up. It may be a little difficult for your new partner at first, but you'll be surprised how quickly your ex-girlfriend gets on with your new boyfriend or vice versa... In fact, they'll be ganging up and both teasing you sooner than you can say 'how flattering to be the centre of everyone's attention'!
do you want to tell anybody?

Now you've 'come out' to yourself. Good job! It probably doesn't feel that different. I mean, it's not like, now you've decided you're gay or lesbian or bi, someone's going to give you a gay card with an instant gay or lesbian identity. You don't have to like Kylie Minogue, get a frock if you're a man or a tractor if you're a woman. Gay people come in all sizes â€“ white, black, Asian, Oriental, Eskimo, Native American... It's a big gay Tower of Babel out there with all cultures and all walks of life.

So don't forget that you're you, and now you've started to put the gay thing out of the way, you can get on with being just that. The only trouble is that you may find, when you tell someone else, they'll want to put you in a box. Resist this. Don't be a stereotype. Always stay true to yourself.

Now that you've opened up the possibility of following what you feel is in your heart, you'll probably want to tell someone. You don't have to, but if you do, here's a word of advice: not everyone you tell will think that Christmas has come! Some people will jump up and down at the news and think it's great, but others will think you're the devil himself, and a few â€“ and we really love these â€“ won't think it makes any difference at all. The most difficult thing about all this is that it's not always easy to predict how anyone will react.

So while coming out will probably feel like a great relief, it may also make you a bit tense for a while. You may feel apprehensive about telling the crowd you hang with because there may be guys or girls who you think may become aggressive about it. They may think it's trendy for pop stars, but they may not like you being gay. They may tease you; they may even try to hurt you. At work, you may worry that your boss will be nasty to you or deny you promotion, if you tell him/her. If you are the boss or the manager, you may worry that your authority will be undermined, that people will gossip behind your back. If you have kids, you may be frightened that being gay will be used by your co-parent or your parents-in-law â€“ or even your own parents â€“ to say that you're not fit to be a mum or dad.

These are the worst-case scenarios. All of them have happened, and as long as some people feel angry and hostile towards gay men and women, they will go on happening. But try to keep your head; don't let anxiety overcome you. In most cases, it'll be absolutely fine. You've just got to be a bit sensible in the face of this kind of stupidity.

First of all, think carefully about who you trust and just tell them. Get some troops on your side. Even if there's no trouble ahead, it'll make you feel good because the people who go on liking or loving you are the ones you will know are your real friends. If it looks like there might be a problem, give one of the helplines listed in help and info a ring. They'll know exactly how to advise you.

As a general rule, don't just leap in. Be prepared. Try to think what people's reactions might be. And decide how much you want to tell them. For instance, you may not want to let on whether you've had sex, or who with or where. Don't say anything you don't want to.

And be gentle. Remember it'll be them, not you, who might have a problem about you being gay. So maybe try to drop a few hints first to test the water (boys â€“ put a cherry in your pint; girls â€“ start watching Ellen). Try not to bounce people into it. I mean, don't sit at Christmas lunch with all the family and say loudly: 'Can you pass the salt... to a homosexual?'

*friends*

They are probably the easiest people to tell. Tell your closest and oldest friends first. They will probably feel very protective towards you. Of course, some may react badly. They may worry about being thought gay themselves and, I'm afraid, you may just lose their friendship. But on the whole, trust your friends. They will be your greatest allies.

If you're young, your friends may well just find your being gay kind of intriguing but reasonably ordinary. Don't expect fanfares â€“ as if you're something special!

If you're older, you may be more nervous, if only because your friends have thought you're straight for longer. But really close friends may feel very proud and touched that you've chosen to tell them.

*school mates*

I'm sorry if this sounds alarmist, but watch out for bullies and make sure you know a sympathetic teacher.

It can be tough at school. Most people these days have all seen EastEnders, Hollyoaks, In&Out, My Best Friend's Wedding and all the other gay people on TV or in the movies, so they should be quite used to the idea. If they're not, they're idiots... but, sadly, some of them are. So just look after yourself and don't tell anyone at all unless you feel confident.

*college mates*

At college or university, there will probably be a lesbian, gay and bisexual group. Join even if you leave seconds later. That way you'll meet people. It tends to be much easier to come out at college or university. And who knows: you may meet your first love. (Make 'aaaah' sounds now and think of little puppies...)

If you're in a club or a society or a sports team or you're the West Dorset tiddlywinks champ, or Ms Pottery Evening Class or whatever, just get one thing straight in your head. You're no different from the prop forward or the bridge demon or the tennis doubles partner or the gardener you were before you came out.

You do these things because they're a laugh. And nothing is going to get in the way of that. This is a classic time to remember that being gay is not all of you. It's just one bit and it definitely shouldn't affect the way you climb a mountain or sail a boat. If you do have trouble, look in the gay press and see if you can find a gay or lesbian club devoted to your interest. You'll be amazed at what's available!

*work colleagues*[/u]

Has anyone else come out in your workplace? How did it go down? Who was OK about it? Why not try to tell them about yourself first?

And don't feel obliged to come out. Work is not your private life and you may want to keep the two separate. But don't get yourself into the position where you have to lie. It horribly uncomfortable. There's nothing worse than being asked to dinner or the pub and 'Do bring your girlfriend/boyfriend' when you haven't got one and never will. Just think ahead about what you would want to do in that situation. And do what makes you feel comfortable.

If your job involves kids, be careful: people can be very bigoted about gay people. So just watch out and don't let them give you a hard time. Make sure your boss, if she or he's sympathetic, or your trade union rep knows and will stand up for you if there's trouble. Your union may have a gay and lesbian section.

*family*

This can be a tricky one. Mainly because, by telling them, you will probably knock their expectations. For one thing, most parents expect to have grandchildren. Now, you may well one day have kids, but your average stick-in-the-mud grown-up doesn't tend to have that possibility in the 'gay file' in their brain.

Second, don't forget: you may be 15 or 25 or 55 but you're still their 'little girl' or 'little boy'. Parents don't find it easy to think about their kids having sex anyway, let alone having gay sex. They've heard all sorts of dreadful rumours and scurrilous, ill-informed gossip about what we 'do in bed' so they may be shocked. My suggestion would be to avoid discussing your sex life with your parents, whether you're gay, straight or in a religious order. It's none of their business.

Now, if you do want to tell your parents, try to be compassionate. They know far less about it all than you, and they may need time. You may want to write to them so that they have a chance to talk to each other first. Or you may want to sit them down and tell them face to face. Try not to make it a confrontation of any kind.

If they have found out already â€“ because they've discovered your gay mags under the bed, or a neighbour saw you at the local gay pub or snogging your work mate, or whatever â€“ and they confront you, your best bet is to come clean. This may be very frightening. In the worst possible case, they may really over-react and throw you out if you're living at home. Don't panic. I know that's easy to say, but do try to stay calm underneath the tears and the turmoil. Either find a friend to stay with until your mum and dad get back on their trolley. Or phone one of the helplines you can find in help and info and ask for advice.

Before you do any of this with your parents, you may find it easier to tell your brothers or sisters. There's no guarantee that they'll be Mr and Ms Hipster about it, and they might just freak out because you share a room with them, or it makes them think they're gay, or they think their friends are going to give them a hard time or whatever. Don't forget that you might be dealing with morons here. Who knows? But think about it. You should have a pretty good idea of what they're like. And don't forget that brothers or sisters who feel easy about you being gay can be a great help in calming parents.

*heterosexual partners*

You don't have to be an agony aunt to know that telling your fiancÃ© or wife or husband that, in fact, you're gay or lesbian can be a bit delicate. So do realise that they might feel very let down or rejected and that they might become very angry. Perhaps they feel you've cheated them somehow. So be gentle. You probably do love them, even if not sexually. So try to respect that love, and them. And you won't be the first couple this has happened to. If you doubt that, call Relate (the number is in help and info) and they'll tell you. And they can also help you.

*your kids*

Tread carefully. How old are your kids? What will they understand? How will being a bit different (that is, having a gay parent) affect them at school? Would it be helpful to tell their teacher in case they get any trouble from other kids? It's much more important that your children are happy than it is that you tell them you're gay. You may want to wait, follow their natural curiosity and just answer their questions as they come up. Lots of parents have gone through this, so call one of the helplines and find someone to talk to. The advice you receive will be invaluable â€“ and confidential.
does AIDS frighten you?

Your family may, of course, be worried about AIDS. And so might you. So let's say one thing right out. AIDS develops from HIV, which can be contracted as a result of unprotected sex. There are some rules about having sex (see below) and there are very experienced and friendly people around to give you advice (see help and info). If you don't know, then ask. Ignorance in life is generally a bad thing (although you may do well never to find out about folk dancing). If you're worried about AIDS, always ask for advice, and above all, never do anything sexually that you don't want to. That's never, ever.

AIDS frightens us all. But since it first appeared on the scene, a great deal of research has been done, and there is a lot of good advice about how to avoid the risk of infection.

HIV is the virus that can lead to AIDS and it can be passed on through sex. Even if you're not thinking of having sex for a while, be a little Boy Scout or Girl Guide â€“ be prepared! These are the basics as far as sexual transmission is concerned:

    * HIV is found in blood and in semen (men) and vaginal fluid (women).
    * Sex that lets any of these into your body is a risk for HIV infection/AIDS.
    * Having anal sex and not using a strong condom is the highest-risk thing to do for both partners.
    * Oral sex is believed to cause HIV infection only rarely and so is classed as 'safer sex'. However, to be extra careful, avoid it.
    * There is no risk of HIV infection from kissing or masturbation.
    * If you want to know more about what precautions to take, phone a helpline and ask.

*Do not do anything sexual that you do not want to do. Use your head at all times.
what next?*

Well, Rule No. One is: Don't rush it, if you don't want to. Take things at your own pace. And don't feel that you've got to fit, willy nilly, into the gay scene and speed off to your nearest gay bar. You may not like bars. Or you may like bars but you want to go to the ones you've always gone to with the friends you've always had. Don't be bullied by some image you might have in your mind about how to be gay. And anyway, these days, gay bars are not all the same. So find one you like. And if you feel nervous about going to a bar or a club, take a friend with you. Nowadays, clubs and pubs are very mixed: gay/straight, male/female. This can be great, although occasionally confusing when you fancy the boy by the bar and he turns out to be dating the girl that the lesbian next to you is getting hot and bothered about. But wow, folks, it is a new millennium.

On the other hand, if you can't wait to dive fully naked into the gay scene and go clubbing every night, have sex, join Stonewall's Equality Campaign, call all men 'darling' and slap all women on the back, then be our guest. Just do what feels good for you.

A good way to begin is to buy one of the gay mags or papers. They have listings of all the gay pubs, clubs, helplines, sex lines (which are expensive and will show up on your phone bill, so you've been warned!)... in fact, the lot. You can get the Gay Times and Diva in most newsagents â€“ although the copies are often put on the top shelf and you feel like you're buying porn. Well, you're not. The PinkPaper is distributed free mainly to gay venues.

Sometimes it takes a bit of courage to go up to the counter and ask for a gay publication, and you may not want to do it at your local newsagent, particularly if you haven't told your family or friends yet. So if you don't feel confident about buying a paper, phone your local gay switchboard, which will be listed in the phonebook.

People often feel that gay clubs are very youth-oriented, and they often are. But look, as far as we know there's no youth serum in the world, so you're stuck with your age. Enjoy it whether you're 16 or 76. And the first time you go to a pub or club, you might just feel great about it, a real sense that you've 'come home'. But you might feel nervous. So try to relax, try and talk to someone and don't feel you have to chat them up or aim for sex with them. Go easy on yourself â€“ you've got the rest of your life to enjoy being gay.

Don't feel weird about going to clubs and pubs as if they're just illicit places to meet people for sex. You're just doing what everybody else â€“ gay or straight â€“ has been doing on every night of the week since Eve gave Adam a Granny Smith's. Don't feel guilty. And don't feel sex is the only reason for going.

There are also tons of gay and lesbian clubs and campaigns and groups. So you don't have to meet other gay people by the bar. You can meet them halfway up a mountain or lobbying the House of Commons. Look in the listings in the gay press.

what to do if your parents throw a wobbler

Well, we need to get them help. The best place is one of the parents' organisations, such as Parents' Enquiry, started by the wonderful Rose Robertson who is about 900 years old now and has been doing this since the 1960s. Her volunteers â€“ all parents of gays and lesbians â€“ can help you, and they can also talk to your parents if you like.

Often parents can't cope because they're very religious. There is a lesbian and gay Christian movement and there is nothing, despite what people say, to stop you being gay and religious. In fact, in the case of many vicars, quite the reverse seems to be true.

In general, it might be good, before you tell your parents, to have a friend on standby, in case anything goes wrong. If your parents get violent or try to take you to the priest or the doctor, resist. They have no legal power over you to do anything about the fact that you're gay. Nothing will stop you being gay â€“ because you are. And they probably just need calming down. But if you do need legal advice â€“ and, remember, your parents have no rights over you â€“ call your local gay switchboard.

*what to do if your parents don't throw a wobbler*

Celebrate and offer to rent them out to anybody whose parents aren't coping well. Seriously, if they are fine about it, they can be a huge help to others. You will find that, if your parents are known to have no problem about you being gay, other friends will come and talk to them if they feel worried.


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## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

*what to do if you're ethnically enhanced â€“ trad families can be a nightmare*

In many of the minority communities in Britain, being gay can be particularly difficult because of the strong emphasis on traditional family and marriage. The family may be doubly important and very tightly knit because it can protect its members from the effects of racism. So telling your family that you're gay if you're Asian or West Indian might feel trebly difficult. You may end up feeling excluded from your own community.

However, remember that, even if it's really difficult for you, other people have done it before. There are groups of Asian and black gay people you can phone or go along to meet. Their experiences will help you. And who knows? You might meet someone. Then you can go back to your parents and tell them that you're gay, but the good news is that you're going out with another black guy/girl!
what the law says

The Labour government spent two years of its first term in government trying to get a law passed that would equalise the age of consent. Although the House of Commons voted for the change, the House of Lords voted against it. This meant the bill had to go back to the Commons to be voted on again. In December 2000, after the Lords had thrown the bill out for the third time, Prime Minister Tony Blair invoked the Parliament Act â€“ a rarely used mechanism used to override the House of Lords. On 8 January 2001 the age of consent was finally equalised at 16 for everyone, whether gay, heterosexual (straight) or bisexual. No age is specified for lesbians.

But don't feel that means you have to. Just do what feels right to you. And don't forget that whether you're gay or straight you can always say no to someone who wants to have sex with you when you don't.
take it easy

    * Beware drugs and alcohol in the previously mentioned palaces of pleasure. Make sure you know the effects of anything you drink or take.
    * If you go home with someone, always make sure you have safe sex â€“ and if you don't know what that means, ring one of the helplines for advice (see help and info).

If you're gay, you may be a fairy but coming out isn't a magic wand. Just coming to terms with your lesbian or gay sexuality can create problems in the short term. So take it easy. Don't expect some magical world to open up immediately. But, on the other hand, it will be a lot, lot, lot better than being trapped in a twilight zone of indecision in your own mind.

Coming out is not some cure-all for every problem in your world. Don't forget you're still the same person both sides of the line.

*yahoo! I'm alive!*

You're home free. Now the really difficult bit starts. You have to get on with the business of living and being as happy or stimulated or lazy or brilliant or stupid as you can and fulfill whatever your destiny holds for you.

There aren't any rules, but being gay can throw up problems that others don't have to deal with. These problems are mainly the result of prejudice from other people and you will have to find your own way of dealing with them. Things have changed enormously for the better in recent years, but we still don't live in a land where everybody gets sweeties and gum. And we probably never will. But remember one thing: being gay doesn't make you good or bad, right or wrong, happy or unhappy... those are just decisions you have to make once you've got used to being gay. So great good gay luck to you!


*My story*


  My story starts around 7th or 8th grade.  Despite having a 4th grade girlfriend(lol) Iâ€™d never been interested in girls.  One day my cousin and I were snooping through my grandpaâ€™s collection of Playboy magazines.  He was completely engrossed by them, but I didnâ€™t get what the big deal was.  I was bored of them, and couldnâ€™t tell what was â€œhotâ€ and what wasnâ€™t.  This disinterest continued on through high school as all my friends were hooking up.   On numerous occasions I turned down girls.  My junior year in high school my parents got the internet (yay Iowa).  I began to learn more about homosexuality.  Yeah Iâ€™d heard of it, but that was just from TV and hell I looked and acted nothing like those guys.  Then I looked into it more, found that I was attracted to guys and I didnâ€™t have to feel that way about every guy I saw.  I went into deep denial after that.  I couldnâ€™t let my friends know.  I couldnâ€™t let my family know.  I couldnâ€™t let the whole football team that I was the star on know.  I finally decided to look and finally get a girlfriend.  Well safe to say that didnâ€™t last long.  Itâ€™s impossible to have a healthy relationship when you donâ€™t care about the other person at all.  I was miserable and Iâ€™m going to guess she was too.   I graduated high school and told no one.  I then went to a junior college on a football scholarship even though I didnâ€™t want to.  I sunk into depression.

  I often wondered why I bothered getting out of bed in the morning.  I started skipping classes and sleeping in.  I hated going to football practice.  I hated being a fake every day.  I thought about suicide, at least then the secret could die with me.  I thought about it for a good long time.  Before I managed to do anything stupid to myself, I received a harsh wake up call.  My cousin Tyler slit his wrists.  He was hospitalized and in stable condition when I received the news.  He had a hard life as well.  His parents got a divorce when he was younger and his mom remarried shortly after.  He had two families and yet was ignored by both.  I felt terrible when I thought about him being gone.  I realized how much I missed him.  I applied that same thought to myself.  How much would people miss me? My attitude from that day on changed.

  After one semester at the junior college, I transferred to another nearby one in preparation to transfer to a university.  I never told anyone why I really left, but that â€œit just wasnâ€™t for meâ€ wasnâ€™t exactly a lie.  Then late last summer I finally built up the courage to tell my parents, well at least my mom.  Talking about myself has never been an easy task and here that held true.  I couldnâ€™t tell my mom so I decided I would write her a letter.

  My mom took it really hard.  She cried a lot and told me she still loved me.  She told my dad a few days later and he took it really bad.  Both my parents are Christian and Republicans.  It got pretty tense at my house so I moved in with my aunt until they cooled off and would talk with me.  We agreed to disagree.  My story really isnâ€™t over.  My parents are in denial/grieving mode.  See: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/538208/

  I wish I could say that it all goes well, but it doesnâ€™t.  One thing I will say is that I am a person am happier than I have ever been.  Iâ€™m no loner depressed and have a better outlook on life.


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## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

This is the most useful thread ever made anywhere ever.

Hey mods, sticky this.


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## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 1, 2008)

I love all the British slang in here..."Throw a wobbler". Priceless. Takun did share this article with me once when I told him I was sick of hiding and wanted to make plans to come out to my family. It was very helpful. Tl;dr? Maybe. But it's worth the read.

My own coming out went extremely well. I was lucky to have the support of my boyfriend and a couple gay friends I knew from school, as well as a few people I knew from here. I was at the bookstore the week before and saw a book called "Now That you Know: A Parent's Guide To Understanding Your Gay Children" and thought it might help, so I bought it. (Only later did I realize it was a little presumptuous [right word?], like "Mom, Dad, I'm gay. Here's a book about how to accept me!" But anyway...) I wrote my mom a letter that took forever because I was starting to have second thoughts and dragging my feet, but I managed to hack it out anyway. The next day before school, I put the book and the letter in an envelope and left. I came out to my little brother as we were on our way home from school, he took it well I guess... just laughed and went back to his ipod... Lots of other stuff happened, but long story short, she acted like nothing was different for a while then approached me later and told me I didn't have to worry about telling them things like this, and were worried because they thought I would get hurt because of this, and felt guilty because I had to go through this alone (I didn't, of course, but it's not like they could have known that). For practical purposes, nothing is different. They understand it's not a choice, I didn't ask to be this way, and it doesn't change anything.

I'm looking forward to them getting to meet my boyfriend in a month, I'm pretty confident that'll go well too. =]

So tl;dr, seek guidance and support where you can. Even if you're not lucky enough to have gay friends, the fandom is full of us. And don't underestimate your parents. They probably love you.


MODS! I second the motion for a sticky.


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## Bambi (Dec 1, 2008)

Third notion for a sticky!

Words could not have expressed this better.


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## Hydramon (Dec 1, 2008)

Wow, Takumi, I am really sorry for you. I wish I could help. But it should become better over time.
As for my story, it has only just started really, so I can't really say much yet. I'm thinking of telling my Mum and maybe Step-dad tomorrow, when they return from work. If I have the courage to do that, I shall re-post, and explain more.


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## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

Good stuff from the parts I did read.

I personally don't have the desire to come out until I get my own place, which should be this summer. We'll see how things play out.


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## Xaerun (Dec 1, 2008)

Fourth vote for sticky.
That is all.

*EDIT* You know my issues, so I'm not going to repost them here.


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## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

Easog said:


> I love all the British slang in here..."Throw a wobbler". Priceless. Takun did share this article with me once when I told him I was sick of hiding and wanted to make plans to come out to my family. It was very helpful. Tl;dr? Maybe. But it's worth the read.
> 
> My own coming out went extremely well. I was lucky to have the support of my boyfriend and a couple gay friends I knew from school, as well as a few people I knew from here. I was at the bookstore the week before and saw a book called "Now That you Know: A Parent's Guide To Understanding Your Gay Children" and thought it might help, so I bought it. (Only later did I realize it was a little presumptuous [right word?], like "Mom, Dad, I'm gay. Here's a book about how to accept me!" But anyway...) I wrote my mom a letter that took forever because I was starting to have second thoughts and dragging my feet, but I managed to hack it out anyway. The next day before school, I put the book and the letter in an envelope and left. I came out to my little brother as we were on our way home from school, he took it well I guess... just laughed and went back to his ipod... Lots of other stuff happened, but long story short, she acted like nothing was different for a while then approached me later and told me I didn't have to worry about telling them things like this, and were worried because they thought I would get hurt because of this, and felt guilty because I had to go through this alone (I didn't, of course, but it's not like they could have known that). For practical purposes, nothing is different. They understand it's not a choice, I didn't ask to be this way, and it doesn't change anything.
> 
> ...



I couldn't be happier than how yours turned out.  You have really good parents.



Hydramon said:


> Wow, Takumi, I am really sorry for you. I wish I could help. But it should become better over time.
> As for my story, it has only just started really, so I can't really say much yet. I'm thinking of telling my Mum and maybe Step-dad tomorrow, when they return from work. If I have the courage to do that, I shall re-post, and explain more.



Thanks, I wish anything would work but it seems I have have to wait it out.  If you think it will go well I say tell them.  If you have support it really does help.  Good luck.



brrrr said:


> Good stuff from the parts I did read.
> 
> I personally don't have the desire to come out until I get my own place, which should be this summer. We'll see how things play out.



Makes sense, I waited til I was almost leaving for college again when my dad wasn't home because I knew I could talk better with my mom.


----------



## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> Thanks, I wish anything would work but it seems I have have to wait it out.  If you think it will go well I say tell them.  If you have support it really does help.  Good luck.


I'll have to support the idea of having someone there to give you some strength would be a good thing. The idea of having someone to play your backbone sounds really encouraging.



			
				Takumi_L said:
			
		

> Makes sense, I waited til I was almost leaving for college again when my dad wasn't home because I knew I could talk better with my mom.


I think that's how it's going to play out with me and my parents as well. I don't really have a good plan for it yet, but something like what you did is probably my best bet. Having both of them in the same room with me is intimidating enough.


----------



## Zanzer (Dec 1, 2008)

Man..... This is a really big help >.>

and I'm feeling just has you discribed you self in your story.

I'm being depressed everyday non stop, not doing work not bothering to do anything and Iplanned sucide....





I don't know what to do anymore but this helped


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## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

My story:

I was straight. I started noticing attractive guys, but still liked girls. Thought about it for a long while. And now im bi.


----------



## Werevixen (Dec 1, 2008)

I came out with it, everyone was fine with it. My parents know I'm a furry and a faggot (note: not a swishy faggot). The End


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## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

Zanzer said:


> Man..... This is a really big help >.>
> 
> and I'm feeling just has you discribed you self in your story.
> 
> ...



I had days I didn't leave bed, skipped classes, and all that fun stuff.  Don't do it.  Life really can get better:3


----------



## Mr Fox (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> My story:
> 
> I was straight. I started noticing attractive guys, but still liked girls. Thought about it for a long while. And now im bi.


 
Indeed this story of his mirrors mine. 

But yeah it is a very helpful thread.


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## Zanzer (Dec 1, 2008)

(can't quote)  It can but it can get really worse. The only reason i'm not doing it's becuase of certian people. and then sometimes I feel like im metaly broken andsuch


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## Gavrill (Dec 1, 2008)

I came out as bisexual when I was 14....my parents didn't care. Then I slowly started liking girls and girls more...I could never really find guys I liked, so I proclaimed I was a lesbian.

Now, however, I'm comfortable in saying I like guys. So I'm bisexual. I have a terrible crush on one of my guy-friends because he's smart, internet-savvy, and is quiet and mellow like me. 

But he's with another girl, and I'm with my masters...so yeah...


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## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

Zanzer said:


> Man..... This is a really big help >.>
> 
> and I'm feeling just has you discribed you self in your story.
> 
> ...


Suicide is never the answer. I went through a lot of depression. I dealt with it by, spending time alone and thinking about it. If you need to talk im always here to help.


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## Zanzer (Dec 1, 2008)

(quote Silibus school comp can't quote) 
I gess that might work, but I have so much work it's too much for me :S I barley get any free time just working and working and failing and failing e.e


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## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

Zanzer said:


> (quote Silibus school comp can't quote)
> I gess that might work, but I have so much work it's too much for me :S I barley get any free time just working and working and failing and failing e.e


When you do find some free time take a walk, or find a nice quiet place to think. It doesnt have to be long, just as long as you want it to be.


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## Zanzer (Dec 1, 2008)

Yeah I should... >.>


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## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

Zanzer said:


> Yeah I should... >.>


You could also talk with others. When you have things in common with someone else the burden isnt as hard to hold.


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## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

I found the best way is just accept my fellings :3


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## ToeClaws (Dec 1, 2008)

Excellent post!

I think that will help with a lot of folks struggling over what to do and how to do it.  I think the time we live in right now is sort of a transitory time between people not accepting it and people easily accepting it, and that varies a bit more or less depending on your country.  

I think age also plays considerably into the equation.  Younger parents are often more open than older ones.  Each generation tends to be a little less harsh toward deviations from the social "norm".  If your parents are in their 80's, then chances are they're not going to easily accept your being gay or bi.  If they're in their 40's, chances are much better.  Granted, the age thing is not written in stone - there are always exceptions to any rule.

I've not come out yet to my parents, who are 60; I'm not sure how they would take it, but they also don't need to know unless I settle down with a guy.  All previous relationships they've seen have been female.  So, will probably have to tell them in time... just hope their hearts can take it.   No other family member knows either.

For me, my bisexuality is known only to a few friends, most are furry, some are not.


----------



## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

ToeClaws said:


> For me, my bisexuality is known only to a few friends, most are furry, some are not.


All of my friends know im bi and a furry as well. None of my family knows and I do not plan on letting them find out anytime soon.


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## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

ToeClaws said:


> Excellent post!
> 
> I think that will help with a lot of folks struggling over what to do and how to do it.  I think the time we live in right now is sort of a transitory time between people not accepting it and people easily accepting it, and that varies a bit more or less depending on your country.
> 
> ...




Indeed, my dad is 50 and taking it the hardest.  Surprisingly my grandparents all seem to be fine with it.  One thing that irked me was them saying my sister can't know because she is too young and it will confuse her so I can't be expressing myself....


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## ToeClaws (Dec 1, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> Indeed, my dad is 50 and taking it the hardest.  Surprisingly my grandparents all seem to be fine with it.  One thing that irked me was them saying my sister can't know because she is too young and it will confuse her so I can't be expressing myself....



Oh? What do they claim is too young?  My ex's daughter (not my child) has kids, age 7 and 9, and they both know about me and understand/accept it just fine.


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 1, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> Indeed, my dad is 50 and taking it the hardest.  Surprisingly my grandparents all seem to be fine with it.  One thing that irked me was them saying my sister can't know because she is too young and it will confuse her so I can't be expressing myself....


My grandma (grandpa's been dead for a looong~ time) seemed to take it just fine. All she said was she's glad she knows. I was surprised...not complaining, but I was surprised.

I'm kind of worried about my little brother, he'll be going through that phase soon enough, the one where kids find out the meaning of the word "gay" for the first time and it becomes an insult, and suddenly you can't touch a guy without being laughed at. I wonder what he'll think of me at that point, if he'll downplay the fact that his oldest brother is gay, or hate me for it, or defend me in front of his friends.


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## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

ToeClaws said:


> Oh? What do they claim is too young?  My ex's daughter (not my child) has kids, age 7 and 9, and they both know about me and understand/accept it just fine.



Mine is 4, but like I said...my parents are out there 9_9.



Easog said:


> My grandma (grandpa's been dead for a looong~ time) seemed to take it just fine. All she said was she's glad she knows. I was surprised...not complaining, but I was surprised.
> 
> I'm kind of worried about my little brother, he'll be going through that phase soon enough, the one where kids find out the meaning of the word "gay" for the first time and it becomes an insult, and suddenly you can't touch a guy without being laughed at. I wonder what he'll think of me at that point, if he'll downplay the fact that his oldest brother is gay, or hate me for it, or defend me in front of his friends.



I wonder that too sometimes.  If it will be something she hides or what...


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## Zanzer (Dec 1, 2008)

Damn.... :S they make it sound if being gay was a bad thing.


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## makmakmob (Dec 1, 2008)

This needs to be stickied.
I can only guess at how hard it is to go through through those kinds of situations.


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## ToeClaws (Dec 1, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> Mine is 4, but like I said...my parents are out there 9_9.



Ouch... yeah, that's still too young. :/  Oh well... I just hope that your parents aren't gonna do the opposite of what needs to be done and fill her head with how it's "wrong". >_<


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## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

ToeClaws said:


> Ouch... yeah, that's still too young. :/  Oh well... I just hope that your parents aren't gonna do the opposite of what needs to be done and fill her head with how it's "wrong". >_<



Well yeah, I just wish we could just be natural and she will find out.  She actually told my mom a that I need a girlfriend on numerous occasions...so she understands that side of the coin.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> All of my friends know im bi and a furry as well. None of my family knows and I do not plan on letting them find out anytime soon.


 

That was how I was with my sexuality until about a week and a half ago, but then my dad had a huge argument with me, and practically forced it out of me. Damn him! But only my younger-older brother and my close friends know I'm furry. I have a furry face irl though, lolol.


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## Digitalpotato (Dec 1, 2008)

I dunno, I mean if I went out and told my parents that I'm completely Asexual (No interest in sex. Period.) they'd probably hug me tight and say I was making a good choice. *shrugs*


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## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

What if they wanted grandkids?


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## Digitalpotato (Dec 1, 2008)

That's what my sister is for. >.>;;


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## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

So a question if you don't mind me asking...Can you not even get a boner? :/


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## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

Zanzer said:


> Damn.... :S they make it sound if being gay was a bad thing.


Not bad, but it's easily misunderstood. I honestly have no clue how I would handle a situation of letting a sibling that young know I was bi/gay. It's not bad but like, it's also difficult to explain it to them. At that age, you have no idea what love is, and something that would naturally come comfortably I can see becoming a "you either fall in love naturally or you're gay" perspective in a child's mind. 

Children that young tend to follow a very strict impression of their role model. I'd feel pretty guilty if I unintentionally went and made them 'try gay,' even if it's something they're not naturally comfortable with.

I don't know, it's a weird subject. :-| If it were up to me, I'd leave the object of sexuality completely out of her life and let her learn it as she matures through outside means. I don't think her brother's sexuality should be the spotlight of the family. Ehhh I dunno though, he did mention that she's already begun insisting he get a girlfriend. When she meets any future boyfriends that would certainly puzzle her.

Gah children confusing the hell out of me.


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## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 1, 2008)

Digitalpotato said:


> I dunno, I mean if I went out and told my parents that I'm completely Asexual (No interest in sex. Period.) they'd probably hug me tight and say I was making a good choice. *shrugs*


You know, I've actually always wondered what it's like to come out as an asexual. My guess is depending on the parents you have, they might be really glad you'll never do anything you'll regret, or upset that you'll never do the whole marriage, kids, white picket fence.

Or maybe just happy you're not gay ._.


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## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

ToeClaws said:


> Ouch... yeah, that's still too young. :/ Oh well... I just hope that your parents aren't gonna do the opposite of what needs to be done and fill her head with how it's "wrong". >_<


 
Personally, I don't think 4 is too young at all.  My sister is 18 years older than I am and is gay, and was gay when I was born, so I was quite literally raised with it in my immediate family.  *shrug.*  

...I'd say it didn't affect me, but let's be serious, I guess it did.  Huh.  Guess I just shot myself in the foot there.


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## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Personally, I don't think 4 is too young at all.  My sister is 18 years older than I am and is gay, and was gay when I was born, so I was quite literally raised with it in my immediate family.  *shrug.*
> 
> ...I'd say it didn't affect me, but let's be serious, I guess it did.  Huh.  Guess I just shot myself in the foot there.


You cant be gay, because you lovers me. >w<


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## ToeClaws (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Personally, I don't think 4 is too young at all.  My sister is 18 years older than I am and is gay, and was gay when I was born, so I was quite literally raised with it in my immediate family.  *shrug.*
> 
> ...I'd say it didn't affect me, but let's be serious, I guess it did.  Huh.  Guess I just shot myself in the foot there.



Noooooo!  Not the foot!  ... Okay come on, y'all likely expected me to make a footpaw comment sooner or later. 

It's not so much the age in terms of not being able to accept or understand it as it is the ability of the child to keep it to themselves.  Being a private thing, people generally keep quiet about another's sexual orientation, and older kids get to an age where they understand the concept of privacy, while younger one's are more innocent and don't see why it would matter.

I think that's awesome though that you got to grow up with it always being there.   I think that allows people to be who they are to a much fuller extent.  So your parents were pretty cool with it then?


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## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> ...I'd say it didn't affect me, but let's be serious, I guess it did.  Huh.  Guess I just shot myself in the foot there.


Heheh, despite that I think it's really cool you grew up in such a comfortable environment for your sexuality. Whether you adjusted well I guess was up to you, but it seems relaxing when looking in on the concept.


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> You cant be gay, because you lovers me. >w<


 
Silly Bus is an honorary chick.  *snuggles*  ^^



ToeClaws said:


> Noooooo! Not the foot! ... Okay come on, y'all likely expected me to make a footpaw comment sooner or later.
> 
> It's not so much the age in terms of not being able to accept or understand it as it is the ability of the child to keep it to themselves. Being a private thing, people generally keep quiet about another's sexual orientation, and older kids get to an age where they understand the concept of privacy, while younger one's are more innocent and don't see why it would matter.
> 
> I think that's awesome though that you got to grow up with it always being there.  I think that allows people to be who they are to a much fuller extent. So your parents were pretty cool with it then?


 
I can see that being a factor if you wanted to keep it on the low-down.  My sister wasn't exactly quiet about her relationship, so no one cared if I blabbered my yapper off to anyone who'd listen about my "big sissy's girlfriend."

And no, my mom totally spazzed about it at first, but she got over it eventually; lucky to have one of those parents that figures family is more important than sexual orientation.  And my sister is actually my half-sister (different fathers), so even though my dad is a bit on the homophobic side, he didn't really have a say in how she behaved.  XD  As far as I know, if he wanted to keep me sheltered from it, he lost the fight.


----------



## Gavrill (Dec 1, 2008)

You guys are lucky.

My dad's parents disowned me after they learned about it.


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## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Silly Bus is an honorary chick.  *snuggles*  ^^


*Dresses like a french maid* Meow



Shenzi said:


> You guys are lucky.
> 
> My dad's parents disowned me after they learned about it.


Same here.


----------



## Thatch (Dec 1, 2008)

I gather that a straight person is not welcome in this thread?


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## Imperial Impact (Dec 1, 2008)

Story:
I was only 14 when this happen, So anyways I was doing something and some kid pushed this really cute guy toward me. And well..... I felt my dick in the guy's ass. .-.


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> *Dresses like a french maid* Meow


Not sure if that's more creepy or hot. XD 



szopaw said:


> I gather that a straight person is not welcome in this thread?


GTFO.

Joking. *snug* X3  You can tell your coming-out story as a straight guy!  In this community, that's probably more unusual than the rest of the stuff in this thread.


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 1, 2008)

szopaw said:


> I gather that a straight person is not welcome in this thread?


*HISS* Straight people on MY FA? It's more likely than you think. >.>

Any input you can provide will be welcomed, I'm sure :V


----------



## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Not sure if that's more creepy or hot. XD


): I'll dress like a granny then...


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> ): I'll dress like a granny then...


 
Augh!  Go back to the maid, THE MAID!  ><


----------



## Azure (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> ): I'll dress like a granny then...


Hawt.  Pics requestedToo bad the Mugshot thread is dead.


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## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Augh!  Go back to the maid, THE MAID!  ><


I'll dress like Walter from Hellsing.


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## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

That'll do.  :3


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## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 1, 2008)

*cough*



Takumi_L said:


> I humbly ask that this thread stay clean and ask that it be taken seriously, that people stay on topic, and maybe we can do some good on this forum.


:scroogeface:


----------



## Azure (Dec 1, 2008)

On topic in my FA? More likely than you think.  I'd regale you folks with how I became a gay, but that's boring.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

I like men and women. I recommend it :3


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## mrredfox (Dec 1, 2008)

tl;dr but from what ive seen the thread is good so +1


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## ToeClaws (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> I can see that being a factor if you wanted to keep it on the low-down.  My sister wasn't exactly quiet about her relationship, so no one cared if I blabbered my yapper off to anyone who'd listen about my "big sissy's girlfriend."
> 
> And no, my mom totally spazzed about it at first, but she got over it eventually; lucky to have one of those parents that figures family is more important than sexual orientation.  And my sister is actually my half-sister (different fathers), so even though my dad is a bit on the homophobic side, he didn't really have a say in how she behaved.  XD  As far as I know, if he wanted to keep me sheltered from it, he lost the fight.



Wow... glad it worked out for ya then.  I imagine my folks would feel "disappointed", not sure if they'd get over it or not.  My brother, who's younger than (but turning 30 this month) is a major homophobe, and I doubt he'd take the news well.  I snicker at the thought though that he's unknowingly sat beside a very dear (and gay, and furry) friend who lives down in Texas as well.  

Well anyway, I think the end results for how you are turned out great Nylak.  I think that'll serve as nice inspiration to others too.


----------



## Digitalpotato (Dec 1, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> So a question if you don't mind me asking...Can you not even get a boner? :/



Yes, but the best part....I can control it.  Even when I happen to have a fetish for women with attractive personalities, beautiful faces, and realistic breast sizes that don't send them walking to the chiropractor every other week. 

You know not all asexuals are immune to arousal. Most just prefer having a relationship with someone without having to base it entirely around sex. I would probably also put in an Engineering Major joke, but I go to Colorado State university and when you can't open the school newspaper without seeing one, it's nearing the "Chuck Norris" level of staleness.


----------



## Thatch (Dec 1, 2008)

Digitalpotato said:


> Most just prefer having a relationship with someone without having to base it entirely around sex.



And here I though that it was merely being mature and sensible about relationships, but what the hell do I know.


----------



## Tigre (Dec 1, 2008)

Excellent thread

I've only let people know I'm bi online. Then again, I don't talk to many people outside of the online world


----------



## Digitalpotato (Dec 1, 2008)

szopaw said:


> And here I though that it was merely being mature and sensible about relationships, but what the hell do I know.



*shrugs* Probably not wanting to jump right into the sex because you actually have the willpower to control sexual urges. 

Ask my friends if you start mentioning Yiff, even plain old "No Bondage, No hyper, no vore or watersports, Foxes only, final destination!" is unappealing to me.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Digitalpotato said:


> Yes, but the best part....I can control it.  Even when I happen to have a fetish for women with attractive personalities, beautiful faces, and realistic breast sizes that don't send them walking to the chiropractor every other week.
> 
> You know not all asexuals are immune to arousal. Most just prefer having a relationship with someone without having to base it entirely around sex.



Ah, okay. I just don't understand asexuality. Not that I don't understand why, but I just only have a vague comprehension of it.


----------



## Digitalpotato (Dec 1, 2008)

I don't understand it either. I'm surprised my Sociology textbook that's talking about Sexuality didn't mention it at all.


----------



## Thatch (Dec 1, 2008)

Digitalpotato said:


> *shrugs* Probably not wanting to jump right into the sex because you actually have the willpower to control sexual urges.
> 
> Ask my friends if you start mentioning Yiff, even plain old "No Bondage, No hyper, no vore or watersports, Foxes only, final destination!" is unappealing to me.



From what i gathered till now, being asexual means not having sexual urges at all, not controlling them.


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 1, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> Indeed, my dad is 50 and taking it the hardest. Surprisingly my grandparents all seem to be fine with it. One thing that irked me was them saying my sister can't know because she is too young and it will confuse her so I can't be expressing myself....


 Your parents are being horrible. They're using your sister as an excuse to try and stop you being who you are. You can *not* allow this. Don't pretend to be something you're not.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> Don't pretend to be something you're not.



Said the furry.

On topic, I am out as bisexual to most of my friends!

Just, you know, not my family. :x


----------



## Azure (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Said the furry.
> 
> On topic, I am out as bisexual to most of my friends!
> 
> Just, you know, not my family. :x


Bring Colin home and do it on the couch while they watch.  I'm sure they'll get the message.


----------



## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> Your parents are being horrible. They're using your sister as an excuse to try and stop you being who you are. You can *not* allow this. Don't pretend to be something you're not.


That's being way too intolerant on their behalf, I agree. I don't think sexuality has to be brought into family relations, but should the issue ever arise I don't think he should have to hide. That's about as sure as I can be on this. If his sister were to ever take the initiative and ask why her brother liked other guys, I'd be totally stumped what to say. It's hard enough explaining homosexuality to some people, let alone a 4 year old.


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 1, 2008)

brrrr said:


> That's being way too intolerant on their behalf, I agree. I don't think sexuality has to be brought into family relations, but should the issue ever arise I don't think he should have to hide. That's about as sure as I can be on this. If his sister were to ever take the initiative and ask why her brother liked other guys, I'd be totally stumped what to say. It's hard enough explaining homosexuality to some people, let alone a 4 year old.


A story I read had a mother explaining homosexuality to her daughter in a really good way. I'll just find it and edit this post with it.
EDIT: Quote from Chapter 5 of Heist (by Sanada)
" And we were talking about the person that Shaun likes. You know, like in your fairy tales? The princess falls in love with the prince. Except for Shaun, he falls in love with a prince too."


----------



## VVhiteWolf (Dec 1, 2008)

Thanks for the thread, might decide to tell my parents soon, although I am almost definate my dad'll kill me. T_T


----------



## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

VVhiteWolf said:


> Thanks for the thread, might decide to tell my parents soon, although I am almost definate my dad'll kill me. T_T


I dont know why, but fathers always seem the most offended by their child being bi/gay.


----------



## CaptainCool (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> I dont know why, but fathers always seem the most offended by their child being bi/gay.



its not only about sexuality, as it seems moms are generally more open minded then dads...
thats what ive seen a lot both in other households and in my own family. my mom encourages me to do stuff while my dad always thinks its "weird" and is not really excited about it...


----------



## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> I dont know why, but fathers always seem the most offended by their child being bi/gay.


Women tend to be more understanding about anything, for starters. I'm sure initially they feel like they did something wrong, as the father-figure is seen as the man who sculpts his boys into big strong dudes.

Obviously playing off of stereotypes, but that's how I see it.



CaptainCool said:


> its not only about sexuality, as it seems moms are generally more open minded then dads...
> thats what ive seen a lot both in other households and in my own family. my mom encourages me to do stuff while my dad always thinks its "weird" and is not really excited about it...


Also this


----------



## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

CaptainCool said:


> its not only about sexuality, as it seems moms are generally more open minded then dads...
> thats what ive seen a lot both in other households and in my own family. my mom encourages me to do stuff while my dad always thinks its "weird" and is not really excited about it...





brrrr said:


> Women tend to be more understanding about anything, for starters. I'm sure initially they feel like they did something wrong, as the father-figure is seen as the man who sculpts his boys into big strong dudes.
> 
> Obviously playing off of stereotypes, but that's how I see it.



I always thought its was about threatening the father's masculinity.


----------



## CaptainCool (Dec 1, 2008)

i guess many dads think they 'failed' when they find out their son is bi/gay. they become afraid and confused and start yelling...
monstly anger is just another form of fear


----------



## Imperial Impact (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> I always thought its was about threatening the father's masculinity.


 Lol what?


----------



## Enigmaticat (Dec 1, 2008)

CaptainCool said:


> i guess many dads think they 'failed' when they find out their son is bi/gay. they become afraid and confused and start yelling...
> monstly anger is just another form of fear


And fear comes from a lack of knowledge.


----------



## CaptainCool (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> And fear comes from a lack of knowledge.



sad but so very true...


----------



## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> And fear comes from a lack of knowledge.


Understandable. A man from mid-20th century getting hitched with his wife and having kids doesn't really have any desire to know more about something completely irrelevant to his life. That is, homosexuality. 

They're scared, sure, but there's no reason to belittle them. I'm scared of a lot of things too due to my 'lack of knowledge,' homosexuality just isn't one of them.


----------



## Midi Bear (Dec 1, 2008)

Perverted Impact said:


> Lol what?


Ever heard the phrase 'Like father, like son.'? If you're a dad and your son turns out to be gay, you're bound to feel insecure in your masculinity.


----------



## Imperial Impact (Dec 1, 2008)

My dad lacks manly(ness?).


----------



## LoC (Dec 1, 2008)

Perverted Impact said:


> My dad lacks manly(ness?).



They're not saying that, they're saying that a (any) father may doubt his own manliness [regardless of how 'manly' the dad really is] if his son ends up being gay/bi. (And this might cause some... tension between the two.)


----------



## Midi Bear (Dec 1, 2008)

Perverted Impact said:


> My dad lacks manly(ness?).


Manliness, yes.



LoC said:


> They're not saying that, they're saying that a (any) father may doubt his own manliness [regardless of how 'manly' the dad really is] if his son ends up being gay/bi. (And this might cause some... tension between the two.)


AN HERO. Look closer, the question was whether or not he should have 'ness' in there. He was actually making a statement that his dad lacks manliness.


----------



## Quiet269 (Dec 1, 2008)

Wall of Text Tsunami!


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## Midi Bear (Dec 1, 2008)

Quiet269 said:


> Wall of Text Tsunami!


Umm.. no? :-?


----------



## Uro (Dec 1, 2008)

Good read, I'm sure it will help lots of people struggling with this issue. Unfortunately I had to go through most of this shit alone and only recently found some very good friends whom I can talk to about it.

All in all once I admitted it to myself it just feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. It just feels good to act like who you really are. Too bad I can only act like _myself_ in a few places as I'm still pretty closeted around my family and certain friends.

It's hard to go from acting like one side of the spectrum (the playa/clubbing persona I portrayed for so long), to the opposite side (gaylol). When people have known me as straight for so long even though I never really expressed much interest in girls besides close friends. Guess I'm just a good actor heheh.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

LemurBoi said:


> Bring Colin home and do it on the couch while they watch.  I'm sure they'll get the message.



I'd so watch that!


----------



## LoC (Dec 1, 2008)

Midi Bear said:


> AN HERO. Look closer, the question was whether or not he should have 'ness' in there. He was actually making a statement that his dad lacks manliness.



Ouch, my epic fail for the day. Sorry for skimming there. 

*Gets the power saw ready.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> I dont know why, but fathers always seem the most offended by their child being bi/gay.



I'm not sure offended is the right word.  Disappointed? Maybe.  I'm sure all fathers want to see their sons grow up to be just like them (except probably more successful) and have kids and carry on the family name and all that jazz.



Silibus said:


> I always thought its was about threatening the father's masculinity.



I don't think that has anything to do with it, at all.


----------



## Tigre (Dec 1, 2008)

Uro said:


> Good read, I'm sure it will help lots of people struggling with this issue. Unfortunately I had to go through most of this shit alone and only recently found some very good friends whom I can talk to about it.
> 
> All in all once I admitted it to myself it just feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. It just feels good to act like who you really are. Too bad I can only act like _myself_ in a few places as I'm still pretty closeted around my family and certain friends.
> 
> It's hard to go from acting like one side of the spectrum (the playa/clubbing persona I portrayed for so long), to the opposite side (gaylol). When people have known me as straight for so long even though I never really expressed much interest in girls besides close friends. Guess I'm just a good actor heheh.



It's a shame people have to be so judgmental so you need to force yourself to act like someone else. The most important thing to me is that people act themselves, and I don't care what the sexuality is, but in this society its so tough. Good luck man


----------



## Turner (Dec 1, 2008)

I'm only 15...but bisexual & very happy about it. Most people know & tbh, no one actually cares. It's allll gooooooooooood, baby, it's all gooood. 
xx jess xx


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Too much emphasis is put on sexuality nowadays. I partially blame the press for it though, they try and make us bisexuals and gays feel alien.


----------



## Uro (Dec 1, 2008)

Tigre said:


> It's a shame people have to be so judgmental so you need to force yourself to act like someone else. The most important thing to me is that people act themselves, and I don't care what the sexuality is, but in this society its so tough. Good luck man



Heh, yea I hear that dude. I had so much fun at MFF because I could just be me without worrying about what others think.

But around my republican family who go off on gay bashing raves anytime more than 3 of them get together I have to tread carefully. Most of the time I just leave the room and leave then to their ignorant banter.


----------



## Tigre (Dec 1, 2008)

Uro said:


> Heh, yea I hear that dude. I had so much fun at MFF because I could just be me without worrying about what others think.
> 
> But around my republican family who go off on gay bashing raves anytime more than 3 of them get together I have to tread carefully. Most of the time I just leave the room and leave then to their ignorant banter.



I'm sorry you have to go through that. Just remember, there will always be people out there to support you (like us)


----------



## Mr Fox (Dec 1, 2008)

Quiet269 said:


> Wall of Text Tsunami!


 
Read the text then.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 1, 2008)

My story:

Realized I'd really just been fapping to the guys in straight porn, got into gay porn, realized that I really prefer men to women, told my two best friends who couldn't have been more supportive.

the end.


----------



## Digitalpotato (Dec 1, 2008)

szopaw said:


> From what i gathered till now, being asexual means not having sexual urges at all, not controlling them.



I can control them even if I do have them, I still rarely have any if at all.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

bozzles said:


> My story:
> 
> Realized I'd really just been fapping to the guys in straight porn, got into gay porn, realized that I really prefer men to women, told my two best friends who couldn't have been more supportive.
> 
> the end.


 

Bwahaha, that's exactly how I found out that I was *sexually* attracted to men to begin with!!! Weird, huh? But I knew I had deeper feelings before I found this out :3


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 1, 2008)

For me, I can't see any real advantage in coming out. My friends IRL are retardedly homophobic, so I can't see them still talking to me if they knew. My parents probably wouldn't go crazy, but I doubt they'd handle it "well". Extended family is probably a mix between completely tolerant and haters. The main thing would probably just be the awkwardness and annoying ignorance, like people assuming I want to hump them just because they're a guy. I think I'd at least want to wait untill I move out permenantly and even then I'd rather not have to tell them at all, just let them figure it out. iunno what I should do really ???


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Well admitting it here is a good place to start I reckon. Also if you play "gay jokes" on your friends, how would they take it?


----------



## Digitalpotato (Dec 1, 2008)

Easog said:


> You know, I've actually always wondered what it's like to come out as an asexual. My guess is depending on the parents you have, they might be really glad you'll never do anything you'll regret, or upset that you'll never do the whole marriage, kids, white picket fence.
> 
> Or maybe just happy you're not gay ._.



Maybe they'll be glad you're not gay mostly, since an asexual out here wouldn't get chained to fences and left for dead or get their houses burned down or have the KKK coming after them. 

Asexuals do often have sex, if not mostly to reproduce.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

So do you think you'd fall in love (not sexually) with a girl after donating sperm and having it artificially insemenated into her womb?


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

Wait. What? Where'd that "logic" come from?


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

No logic to it at all, just wondered.


----------



## Marodi (Dec 1, 2008)

Silibus said:


> My story:
> 
> I was straight. I started noticing attractive guys, but still liked girls. Thought about it for a long while. And now im bi.


 Same here


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 1, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Well admitting it here is a good place to start I reckon. Also if you play "gay jokes" on your friends, how would they take it?



Tried making a really lame joke to one of them over msn once about me being gay, and the fucker took me seriously. I later found that conversation saved on his computer. I lol'd


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

SnowFox said:


> Tried making a really lame joke to one of them over msn once about me being gay, and the fucker took me seriously. I later found that conversation saved on his computer. I lol'd


 

Wow, that's pretty harsh :/ Are you sure he's a good friend? Not that I'm insinuating he's not, but the evidence suggests otherwise. You have MSN?


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 1, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Wow, that's pretty harsh :/ Are you sure he's a good friend? Not that I'm insinuating he's not, but the evidence suggests otherwise. You have MSN?



He's ok really, just can be really small minded and dumb at times. I used to have MSN, but now I use yahoo.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

SnowFox said:


> He's ok really, just can be really small minded and dumb at times. I used to have MSN, but now I use yahoo.


 

What age group are the pair of you? I suppose it can get a little bit easier to speak to friends when you're 17-18.


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 1, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> What age group are the pair of you? I suppose it can get a little bit easier to speak to friends when you're 17-18.



I think I was 19 at the time, I'm 22 now.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Ah fair enough. So as the OP actually says, it may be that he's always thought you're straight, and that it would just shake his world up a bit. I'm sure if he was a REALLY good friend, he'd accept you for who you are no matter what, even if you had sex with pink brick walls.


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Dec 1, 2008)

So...
Have any of you just automatically assumed you're gay just from what you're thinking about and without even trying anything?

And what if you feel like you're already rejected before you can even talk to anyone about something like that?


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Adelio Altomar said:


> So...
> Have any of you just automatically assumed you're gay just from what you're thinking about and without even trying anything?
> 
> And what if you feel like you're already rejected before you can even talk to anyone about something like that?


 

I haven't had any gay "contact" if you catch my drift, but I know that I am a bisexual man. And hey, I don't really care about it. The person I'm in love with lives in Australia


----------



## Tigre (Dec 1, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> I haven't had any gay "contact" if you catch my drift, but I know that I am a bisexual man. And hey, I don't really care about it. The person I'm in love with lives in Australia



aww 

I'm sorry to hear


----------



## bozzles (Dec 1, 2008)

Adelio Altomar said:


> So...
> Have any of you just automatically assumed you're gay just from what you're thinking about and without even trying anything?
> 
> And what if you feel like you're already rejected before you can even talk to anyone about something like that?



I'm pretty sure you can know that you're gay just from desiring cock. You don't necessarily have to have sex to know.


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Dec 1, 2008)

bozzles said:


> I'm pretty sure you can know that you're gay just from desiring cock. You don't necessarily have to have sex to know.


 
Just from the desire of dick? Not by what you read, or are interested in reading in about? You just know...?


----------



## KittenAdmin (Dec 1, 2008)

Quite honestly I think the big reason I'm bi is that I don't draw lines between genders for love...

But meh... sexual things are a plus >///>


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

bozzles said:


> My story:
> 
> Realized I'd really just been fapping to the guys in straight porn, got into gay porn, realized that I really prefer men to women, told my two best friends who couldn't have been more supportive.
> 
> the end.



Haha, I did that too. \m/



Adelio Altomar said:


> Just from the desire of dick? Not by what you read, or are interested in reading in about? You just know...?



What do the things you read have to do with sex and love?


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Tigre said:


> aww
> 
> I'm sorry to hear



No need to apologise  Just wish I'd said something whilst he was still in the UK. He's coming to visit over Christmas anyway :3


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> What do the things you read have to do with sex and love?


 
Srsly.  I read hetero propagandaImeanmedia but I'm not gonna go shag a dude.  XD


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## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 1, 2008)

Of course, if the you're turned on by the hetero porn, it's something else entirely.


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## brrrr (Dec 1, 2008)

on the subject of coming out to friends, have done it twice. Lost touch with one shortly after. He didn't take it hard or anything but we kind of just gradually stopped hanging out. Other friend didn't really care, we're still friends and he'll crack a light-hearted gayjoke every chance he gets. It's all in good nature though, we tease back and forth like that.

Anyone else I know off the net already knew I was before becoming good friends with them.

oh wait, sister and cousin know as well. That went pretty weird. My sister was like 'lol k' and my cousin was happy and shit that I let her in on my life.


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## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Srsly.  I read hetero propagandaImeanmedia but I'm not gonna go shag a dude.  XD



Damn.  Foiled again.


----------



## Midi Bear (Dec 1, 2008)

My story:

So I'd been denying the thought that I was gay since age ten, then accepted that I was gay at age twelve. I hid it for years, even covering it up with a girlfriend here and there (shameful, I know). Around the end of the first year of high school, I'd found my clique, which was mostly girls (go figure). I was 15 at the time, and it was this time two years ago. I'd grown extremely attached to the friends I'd made and felt like I had to get it out to them.

So I told the most sensible one and she took it really well. I slowly told them all, one after the other. No big "Alright guys" or anything. What's funny is I was hesitant to tell a couple of them. I was all "I dunno if I can say it.." and they were all "Cody, you can tell me anything. You're like my best friend." So I told them and they seemed to take it quite well. So we continued to hang out and it was all fine and dandy. We even compared hotness of other guys, talked 'girl talk' etc (I'd become a femboii by this time). It was great. One of them had a crush on me though, so that kind of hurt her, but she seemed to get over it.

This awesomeness lasted but a week. They started avoiding me and eventually I asked them what was up. I was told I was annoying and that they didn't want to be my friends anymore because they got abuse shouted at them when they were with me in town or whatever, which was complete bullshit. I never heard anybody say anything bad about any of us.. ever. But still, we were such great friends until then that I'm pretty convinced they abandoned me for being gay. Three out of god knows how many stuck with me throughout the whole thing and said "Fuck off" to the others. They are still friends with me today.

I tried talking to them, saying how I knew they were still the same awesome people and that we could still be friends, but it never worked. It got to the point where they'd just shout abuse at me and shit around school. So upon losing who I thought were my best and closest friends and having them turn into the exact opposite, I went into one hell of a deep depression, which lasted around 6-8 months. In that depression, I'd self-harmed a lot so I could escape into my own pain, and I ended it all in one huge slicing frenzy in april 2007. Then I had a whole "Never again" thing.

In addition, I also gazed in the mirror constantly, trying to find myself in the midst of my own depression, trying to see what I had to fix. There was also much crying and suicidal thoughts, joined with a failed attempt (thank fuck I failed).

After a while I gave up on my old friends and found new ones. I told them much earlier to make sure they weren't expecting anything, and to make sure they knew before I grew attached. I didn't want to go through the same horrible feelings again. They took it well and still love me for who I am. However, that summer, I got the hots for one of the friends that stuck with me from the last clique... and it was a girl. So I had like "FUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHKKK!!! I must be bi. Dammit! Now I gotta re-out myself.".
This re-outing was easy, but I was frequently asked why I changed my mind, if I lied about being gay etc. Some even joked around with "So, Cody, what's your sexuality this week?", but on the whole it was all good. I'm still with half of the people.. the other half dropped out of high school and went on to sixth form college. I seldom see them, but when I do, I squeeze them like "OMGOMG I MISSED YUUUU!!".

Anyway, that's by story.

Tl;dr - Came out to best friends, who disowned me. I went into very deep depression for a long fucking time, found new friends, still with them. Hurrah!


----------



## Quiet269 (Dec 1, 2008)

Mr Fox said:


> Read the text then.


too much text...

I was overwhelmed... and woke up with a sore bum...

But for some reason.... I want to go again...


----------



## evilteddybear (Dec 1, 2008)

This helped, and yet at the same time made me more apprehensive about the whole thing....


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

Jesus Christ Midi, that's harsh of your first group, totally unreasonable  I let it out slowly until the current situation where I don't care if someone knows or not. Fortunately in my situation, I still have all the friends I had before. And the time I was considering suicide, it was that I met a guy that I didn't. I still love him to this day, but he's hetero, so I don't think I have a chance unless he has to "out" himself. He told me that if he found out he was, then he'd go for me. Haven't seen him for ages because he moved to Australia year before last. We had some good times over the summer of 2005 :3 So what is your sexuality this week?  Jk mate.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

uh... My story I guess:

I can't believe I'm saying this on a fucking furry thread -.- oh well, I'll try to make it short

when my parents divorced, there was so much drama, you couldn't imagine. on a daily basis, it was 1. wake up to my dad grabbing my sisters hair because she threatened him. (she's extremely rebellious) 2. my brother using my room to smoke pot (he was 9, and I was 6), so incase my dad caught anything, I was to blame, and if I told my dad anything, my brother threatened he'd get his friends to kill me. this was... a daily thing. literally every day, it happened. and I personally, at the end of everyday, just sigh and wonder why everyone was so angry. then when day, I cried when something dramatic happened, and my brother called me gay for it, and I got extremely mad and denied it. and that's when I kinda got to thinking. 

after a few years, I would just repress my sexuality, and completely not even think of the subject. anyway, when I was around 9, my brother for some reason, told me to jack him off, and I didn't know what that meant, and he pretty much forced my hand to it, and I was kind of scared. we never brought it up again though, so that was a bit of a relief. but uh, that must have affected me somehow, cause I would dream about similar scenario's with other guys. 

blah blah blah, after around 4 years, I finally came to accept I was gay. so yea, the whole trouble with my family was in play. after coming out to my dad, he immediately kicked me out, and now I live with my mom. she's not happy about it either, but I guess she sympathizes with me. 

I guess the most positive part of this story is that most of my friends were accepting ^_^


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

I feel really guitly for having the understanding parents


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

You live in England.  People aren't as stupid over there.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> I feel really guitly for having the understanding parents


why should you? 0_o


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> why should you? 0_o



Because I hear so many stories about situations as bad as yours, and they fully don't deserve to be put in that environment. Me on the other hand don't deserve to have it as good as I have it at home. Everything I've ever wanted I've had, within reason. I've had a strict but fair upbringing, and I've had help when I needed it. How have I repaid it? I've been a complete utter selfish twat all my life, and it's only recently that I've started to change, but it's already too late to make amends with my nan since she died nearly 5 years ago. I don't think a single week goes past without me thinking about how badly I treated her, and that's going to stick with me for the rest of my life.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Because I hear so many stories about situations as bad as yours, and they fully don't deserve to be put in that environment. Me on the other hand don't deserve to have it as good as I have it at home. Everything I've ever wanted I've had, within reason. I've had a strict but fair upbringing, and I've had help when I needed it. How have I repaid it? I've been a complete utter selfish twat all my life, and it's only recently that I've started to change, but it's already too late to make amends with my nan since she died nearly 5 years ago. I don't think a single week goes past without me thinking about how badly I treated her, and that's going to stick with me for the rest of my life.


yea, that's one psychological problem that stuck with me all my life. I've always thought negitively about myself. but just because your nan died before you could make amends doesn't mean you're a terrible person. the most helpful advice I've ever been given was simple: forgive people for what they've done to you, but mostly, forgive yourself. it's too late to change your mistakes, but it's never too late to let the past go :3

I sound like some crappy disney movie xD but seriously, as cheesy as that sounds, it seriously helped me in life


----------



## AlexX (Dec 1, 2008)

A few years ago I was convinced I was bisexual (or at least bicurious), but like a true scientist I made sure to test my theory and proved it to be wrong. Apparently it's not necessarily gay for me to like guys being included in stuff... um... relevant to my interests. I still seem to only enjoy sex when there's legitimate love involved though (although granted, this is mostly going by what kinds of porn I enjoy since I lack first-hand experience), so I probably won't be sleeping around like a lot of the guys I know are.

As for the folks... Well, they were highly supportive of me being a furry (apparently they liked that I found a group of people I felt at home with), and surprised the heck out of me by knowing what kind of stuff I had... um... interest in despite them having no way to find out about it (I don't save porn to my computer and never really mention it anywhere), so had I been gay or bi I highly doubt they'd have been against it in any fashion. Heck, they made it clear that they were fine with me going at it with others as long as I'm smart about it and use condoms.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

AlexX said:


> A few years ago I was convinced I was bisexual (or at least bicurious), but like a true scientist I made sure to test my theory and proved it to be wrong. Apparently it's not necessarily gay for me to like guys being included in stuff... um... relevant to my interests. I still seem to only enjoy sex when there's legitimate love involved though (although granted, this is mostly going by what kinds of porn I enjoy since I lack first-hand experience), so I probably won't be sleeping around like a lot of the guys I know are.
> 
> As for the folks... Well, they were highly supportive of me being a furry (apparently they liked that I found a group of people I felt at home with), and surprised the heck out of me by knowing what kind of stuff I had... um... interest in despite them having no way to find out about it (I don't save porn to my computer and never really mention it anywhere), so had I been gay or bi I highly doubt they'd have been against it in any fashion. Heck, they made it clear that they were fine with me going at it with others as long as I'm smart about it and use condoms.


I hope that's not the only theory you went by... have you thought about yourself with another man (same sex, whatever gender you are) and liked it in any way? that's the question I think all bi-curious people should ask themselves first


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> I hope that's not the only theory you went by... have you thought about yourself with another man (same sex, whatever gender you are) and liked it in any way? that's the question I think all bi-curious people should ask themselves first



Stop trying to convert people.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Stop trying to convert people.


....wat?


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

There are enough gay guys around here as it is.  Stop trying to get them over to the dark side.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> There are enough gay guys around here as it is.  Stop trying to get them over to the dark side.


*sigh* I'm not trying to get any straight guys to turn bi or gay. jesus fuck. >_>

and actually nylak, there are hardly ANY gay guys in these forums... maybe a few. most guys here are bi


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> *sigh* I'm not trying to get any straight guys to turn bi or gay. jesus fuck. >_>


 They're joking, Neko. Calm down. ^_^


----------



## AlexX (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> I hope that's not the only theory you went by... have you thought about yourself with another man (same sex, whatever gender you are) and liked it in any way? that's the question I think all bi-curious people should ask themselves first


The only time I ever had an interest in guys was in stuff... relevant to my interests. And it's always furry guys too, which is a bigger strike against the idea since furries can easily be an exception to normal rules (for example, I've run into gay guys who admit to liking furry girls, despite the fact they don't find any normal girl attractive whatsoever). That leaves the final nail in the "I might go both ways" coffin as the fact I've never once found any kind of attraction to human guys, and that's kinda important since if I want the kind of relationship I'm looking for it is obviously going to have to be with someone real and someone human.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

AlexX said:


> The only time I ever had an interest in guys was in stuff... relevant to my interests. And it's always furry guys too, which is a bigger strike against the idea since furries can easily be an exception to normal rules (for example, I've run into gay guys who admit to liking furry girls, despite the fact they don't find any normal girl attractive whatsoever). That leaves the final nail in the "I might go both ways" coffin as the fact I've never once found any kind of attraction to human guys, and that's kinda important since if I want the kind of relationship I'm looking for it is obviously going to have to be with someone real and someone human.


ah, I understand completely. I know a hell of alot of straight guys who've actually pointed at what I look at (a male furry character in a sexy pose for example) and they go "oh wow, that's sexy" xD



			
				Hydramon said:
			
		

> They're joking, Neko. Calm down. ^_^


 David doesn't joke... his words are pure (I think) T___T


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> They're joking, Neko. Calm down. ^_^


 
This.  X3


----------



## AlexX (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> ah, I understand completely. I know a hell of alot of straight guys who've actually pointed at what I look at (a male furry character in a sexy pose for example) and they go "oh wow, that's sexy" xD


Not surprising. Most furries in general are designed to be cute or attractive.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> David doesn't joke... his words are pure (I think) T___T



A joke would be for someone's amusement other than my own.  I troll.  It's different.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

AlexX said:


> Not surprising. Most furries in general are designed to be cute or attractive.



lol, as a matter of fact, most of my friends aren't even furry. aside from the few that I've managed to get involved in the fandom. 

one scenario: I'm at my friends house, and he's watching t.v, and I check my mail on the main FA page, and I click on a picture someone drew, and my friend comes up and goes "woah... that's kinda sexy"


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> lol, as a matter of fact, most of my friends aren't even furry. aside from the few that I've managed to get involved in the fandom.
> 
> one scenario: I'm at my friends house, and he's watching t.v, and I check my mail on the main FA page, and I click on a picture someone drew, and my friend comes up and goes "woah... that's kinda sexy"



Are these the same friends that were sucking on your neck and dick that you told me about


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Are these the same friends that were sucking on your neck and dick that you told me about


no... those guys were actually gay. they made it perfectly clear that they like me >.>


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> no... those guys were actually gay. they made it perfectly clear that they like me >.>



by gang banging you


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> by gang banging you


oh you *flails wrist in a gay fashion*


----------



## bozzles (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> oh you *flails wrist in a gay fashion*


I believe that's called "Limpwristing."


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

bozzles said:


> I believe that's called "Limpwristing."


there are other things called limpwristing as well, I'd rather specify what I mean... >_>


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> oh you *flails wrist in a gay fashion*



Ready for round 2


----------



## Takun (Dec 1, 2008)

On the topic of fathers, for mine there was an evident display of both shame and embarrassment.  First off he didn't want any of my extended family to know, even though all of them knew before he did.  Then that whole facebook incident where he was pissed kids at the school he teaches at know...He really doesn't want people knowing about me ;__;


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> On the topic of fathers, for mine there was an evident display of both shame and embarrassment.  First off he didn't want any of my extended family to know, even though all of them knew before he did.  Then that whole facebook incident where he was pissed kids at the school he teaches at know...He really doesn't want people knowing about me ;__;



Maybe he's just worried people are going to persecute you? *looking for positives*

Who am I kidding you're terrifyingly huge


----------



## Nylak (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Who am I kidding you're terrifyingly huge


 
Seriously, who's gonna take on this fella?  XD


----------



## bozzles (Dec 1, 2008)

I don't plan on EVER coming out to my parents. It's waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy too awkward, and my mom would flip out and try to do something crazy like completely cease all communication or force me to go to church or something.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

bozzles said:


> I don't plan on EVER coming out to my parents. It's waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy too awkward, and my mom would flip out and try to do something crazy like completely cease all communication or force me to go to church or something.



You'll know what to do if you ever want to spite them.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

bozzles said:


> or force me to go to church or something.



ah, if she's willing to do that, DON'T come out to her... trust me, I regret coming out to my mom. nothing hurts more than hearing your own mom tell you how disappointed in you she is, and that you need to repent


----------



## bozzles (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> You'll know what to do if you ever want to spite them.



I've actually thought about doing that.

EDIT: Once, during some sort of conversation, I told my mom that "there's nothing wrong with being gay," and she started yelling at me that it's not okay and that it's "perversion." I got kinda' scared. :/


----------



## AlexX (Dec 1, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> ah, if she's willing to do that, DON'T come out to her... trust me, I regret coming out to my mom. nothing hurts more than hearing your own mom tell you how disappointed in you she is, and that you need to repent


Wait, you have one of THOSE moms?

Sheesh, they're getting way too common these days... If only they knew the truth they'd know there's nothing about it that needs repenting over. =/


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

AlexX said:


> Wait, you have one of THOSE moms?
> 
> Sheesh, they're getting way too common these days... If only they knew the truth they'd know there's nothing about it that needs repenting over. =/


yea, I have one of those moms -.-'

it's gotten to the point where I'm done defending my sexuality... I just question people as to what bothers them so badly about sexuality... I mean, it has nothing to do with them. they're only proving that they're nosey little fucks xD


----------



## Hollow-Dragon (Dec 1, 2008)

I'm not going to deny it any more...  I kept telling myself I'm bi, but when was the last time I had a thought that involved a female sexually?  Quite a while ago... Lately I've been wondering a bit about what would happen if I told my friends or family.  

I've heard a lot of stories about people who are gay telling their friends or families about their orientation, and it's not common in the least bit that these stories end well.  I have a gay neighbor, and I've heard his story.  When he told his parents that he was gay, they shunned him and removed him from the family.  As far as I know, the only person he has now is his husband, who's been away for business in Japan for a while now.  

As for me, my dad is friends with our neighbors, but he doesn't seem too kind on the topic of gay people when they're not visiting.  As for my friends, or I should say they're just a few people I hang out with while at school, make gay jokes and all that BS, but I try not to pay any mind to their conversations on the topic, and act like I don't care.  If they found out what I really am, they'd all avoid me, and I know this for a fact as 5 out of 8 of them seem homophobic.  As for the other 3, they probably wouldn't care.  I don't call them "friends", but more "acquaintances", because they hardly talk to me or talk to me outside of school.  I have one friend who I know could support me if I told them.

So I've kept this all to myself IRL.  I don't think I'll even be ready to tell anyone for quite some time, because I'm afraid I could well lose what little I have.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 1, 2008)

Hollow-Dragon said:


> As for me, my dad is friends with our neighbors, but he doesn't seem too kind on the topic of gay people when they're not visiting.  As for my friends, or I should say they're just a few people I hang out with while at school, make gay jokes and all that BS, but I try not to pay any mind to their conversations on the topic, and act like I don't care.  If they found out what I really am, they'd all avoid me, and I know this for a fact as 5 out of 8 of them seem homophobic.  As for the other 3, they probably wouldn't care.  I don't call them "friends", but more "acquaintances", because they hardly talk to me or talk to me outside of school.  I have one friend who I know could support me if I told them.



I have a similar experience with my friends. most of my friends used to make gay jokes, but when I came out to them, they were accepting. actually, they felt awkward about the gay jokes xD

just don't let someone's personality overcome your judgement of them. they may seem mean as hell, but that doesn't nesescarily mean they'll hate you because you're different from them ^_^


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 1, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Seriously, who's gonna take on this fella? XD


 You. I DARE YOU!


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 1, 2008)

I triple DOG dare you.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 1, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> I triple *DOG* dare you.



It's funny because this is a furry forum.


----------



## KittenAdmin (Dec 1, 2008)

The most flaming gay person at my workplace says, "Wow... Matt, you are so gay." when I do random stuff like sing, or act really cheerful.

I'm like WTF?! I don't float on rainbows do I?

I do act pretty feminine sometimes though >.> I really don't mean to...


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 1, 2008)

KittenAdmin said:


> The most flaming gay person at my workplace says, "Wow... Matt, you are so gay." when I do random stuff like sing, or act really cheerful.
> 
> I'm like WTF?! I don't float on rainbows do I?
> 
> I do act pretty feminine sometimes though >.> I really don't mean to...


 I loled. Expecially at the "I don't float on rainbows do I?"


----------



## Hollow-Dragon (Dec 2, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> I have a similar experience with my friends. most of my friends used to make gay jokes, but when I came out to them, they were accepting. actually, they felt awkward about the gay jokes xD
> 
> just don't let someone's personality overcome your judgement of them. they may seem mean as hell, but that doesn't nesescarily mean they'll hate you because you're different from them ^_^


 
Well a few of them are religious freaks, and I've heard the way the talk about gay people.  There is a gay couple who almost everyone knows at school, and the people who I usualy hang out with hate them.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 2, 2008)

I came out to my best friend of 6 years who lives across the street one night during what has become something we do regularly; "Guy Time" (he spends the night, we stay up so late we lose all inhibitions, then tell each other fucking everything). He told me that he'd fantasized about kissing another guy, so I decided it would be safe to come out to him.

My other friend... the first friend's girlfriend... I told one night after I'd told one too many gay jokes. She told me that she'd always wondered about my sexuality (because of all of the jokes I make), so I told her. And now she won't stop asking me questions about it. But she's cool about it.

Another (super best) friend who I actually sort of haven't come out to but sort of have... for weeks, he'd been making jokes about me being gay... so much it was almost getting sort of annoying. So one day, just as we sat down to see a movie in theaters, I turned to him and said "to be honest, I actually am pretty gay."

... I don't know... I guess he could think that I'm bi or something. I wasn't too specific.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 2, 2008)

Hollow-Dragon said:


> Well a few of them are religious freaks, and I've heard the way the talk about gay people.  There is a gay couple who almost everyone knows at school, and the people who I usualy hang out with hate them.


all you have to say is "religion"... then I know that they don't like gay people... how unfortunate that people abused religion to make it seem like every religious person automatically hates gays


----------



## Nazm (Dec 2, 2008)

CaptainCool: â€œas it seems moms are generally more open minded then dads...thats what ive seen a lot both in other households and in my own family. my mom encourages me to do stuff while my dad always thinks its "weird" and is not really excited about it...â€

  Wow, I wish it were that way with my family.  My parents divorced when I was young and my mom was the more closed-minded, albeit not nearly as bad as some of the parents described here, and of course I had to live with my mom.   My dad was the open-minded one, border-line hippie in fact.   He ended up remarrying a woman who was recently divorced because that husband ended up being gay, yet all of them get along very well.  My mom clings to â€˜old school valuesâ€™ a bit too much.  She asks me frequently â€œWhen are you going to bring back grandkids for me?â€.  Ughhh.  I love her though, and I doubt she would be upset for very long if I told her I was bi ( I guess I do have preference for guys, but there is still the rare girl that strike my fancy).   Actually, Iâ€™m pretty sure she suspects it of me.    I donâ€™t know but momâ€™s have ways, dood, ways of knowing more than they shouldâ€¦

  I wonâ€™t tell them now, of course.  I just moved and donâ€™t have much of a social support structure built up here in case it gets ugly.  That and my old bf decided not to pursue a distance relationship with me and moved on to someone else (kind of sad, but oh well), so I donâ€™t see the point in mentioning it right now as Iâ€™m single.  ( On second thought, maybe my mom would stop nagging me about getting a girlfriend to bring homeâ€¦. That would be some nice peace and quietâ€¦(or wait, what if she started nagging me to bring a boyfriend home!   )).

Anyway, A+++ post OP, would read again and all that.   

And this:

OP: â€œ I mean, don't sit at Christmas lunch with all the family and say loudly: 'Can you pass the salt... to a homosexual?' â€œ 

 made me laugh way more than it probably should have.


----------



## AlexX (Dec 2, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> all you have to say is "religion"... then I know that they don't like gay people... how unfortunate that people abused religion to make it seem like every religious person automatically hates gays


There's plenty who are well aware there's nothing in christanity against it, the moronic ones are just heck of a lot louder... ._.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 2, 2008)

AlexX said:


> There's plenty who are well aware there's nothing in christanity against it, the moronic ones are just heck of a lot louder... ._.


those are the ones who stand out, and make it seem like most christians are crazy bible slinging, homophobes


----------



## AlexX (Dec 2, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> those are the ones who stand out, and make it seem like most christians are crazy bible slinging, homophobes


Indeed... I've practically given up trying to argue with these people, as they don't seem to be open to the idea that what they were taught might possibly be wrong.

'Course, the opposite end of the spectrum doesn't listen to me either, so I guess at the end of the day nobody is listening to me. XP Clearly I need a higher charisma stat.

*insert Datingsim referance about buying beer to increase charisma here*


----------



## Hollow-Dragon (Dec 2, 2008)

AlexX said:


> Indeed... I've practically given up trying to argue with these people, as they don't seem to be open to the idea that what they were taught might possibly be wrong.
> 
> 'Course, the opposite end of the spectrum doesn't listen to me either, so I guess at the end of the day nobody is listening to me. XP Clearly I need a higher charisma stat.
> 
> *insert Datingsim referance about buying beer to increase charisma here*


 
Arguing with a fundamentalist is pretty close to pointless, as to most of them think that whatever their beliefs are, are correct.  

A few weeks ago, we were all in study hall, and then someone started talking about religion.  oon the shifted to the topic that somewhere in the bible, is a part that says if you have intercourse with a man or animal, as you would with a woman, that you'll go to hell.  I'm not sure if that's even true or not...


----------



## Nazm (Dec 2, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> *My story*
> 
> 
> My story starts around 7th or 8th grade.  Despite having a 4th grade girlfriend(lol) Iâ€™d never been interested in girls.  One day my cousin and I were snooping through my grandpaâ€™s collection of Playboy magazines.  He was completely engrossed by them, but I didnâ€™t get what the big deal was.  I was bored of them, and couldnâ€™t tell what was â€œhotâ€ and what wasnâ€™t.  This disinterest continued on through high school as all my friends were hooking up.   On numerous occasions I turned down girls.  My junior year in high school my parents got the internet (yay Iowa).  I began to learn more about homosexuality.  Yeah Iâ€™d heard of it, but that was just from TV and hell I looked and acted nothing like those guys.  Then I looked into it more, found that I was attracted to guys and I didnâ€™t have to feel that way about every guy I saw.  I went into deep denial after that.  I couldnâ€™t let my friends know.  I couldnâ€™t let my family know.  I couldnâ€™t let the whole football team that I was the star on know.  I finally decided to look and finally get a girlfriend.  Well safe to say that didnâ€™t last long.  Itâ€™s impossible to have a healthy relationship when you donâ€™t care about the other person at all.  I was miserable and Iâ€™m going to guess she was too.   I graduated high school and told no one.  I then went to a junior college on a football scholarship even though I didnâ€™t want to.  I sunk into depression.
> ...



Good to see you're happy now at least.  I can't even begin to imagine what that is like with your parents.   

I don't have much for advice to help you out with them, other than just to give it some time for now.  And try not to give up hope with them.   It sounds like your dad hasn't given up on you if he is still hanging out and giving you money.  He probably doesn't understand it and is frightened of what it does to his own image.  And my guess is with all these other people knowing and not caring (assuming they aren't the same way and feeding his fears), eventually he will realize that it really isn't as bad as he is making it out to be.  Your mother overreacted a little with the abortion statements, it happens sometimes.   But the "you make me question my beliefs."; as far as I'm concerned that's a good thing.   She will realize, too, that this isn't the end of the world for her.  And she said she still loves you.  Just be patient for now. 

At least you have boyfriend; I'm sure that helps a ton.


----------



## Nazm (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> A joke would be for someone's amusement other than my own.  I troll.  It's different.



I'm amused by your trolling.  

Sometimes...


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

Hollow-Dragon said:


> Arguing with a fundamentalist is pretty close to pointless, as to most of them think that whatever their beliefs are, are correct.
> 
> A few weeks ago, we were all in study hall, and then someone started talking about religion.  oon the shifted to the topic that somewhere in the bible, is a part that says if you have intercourse with a man or animal, as you would with a woman, that you'll go to hell.  I'm not sure if that's even true or not...



Leviticus 18:22. "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination."

The only verse in that book that anyone gives a shit about anymore.



Nazm said:


> I'm amused by your trolling.
> 
> Sometimes...



Get out.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 2, 2008)

When is Coming Out: The Video Game scheduled for release?


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 2, 2008)

Wow, I haven't seen this much faggotry since I accidentally'd your face.


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 2, 2008)

bozzles said:


> When is Coming Out: The Video Game scheduled for release?


october 11th... I hope people know what day that is :3


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> october 11th... I hope people know what day that is :3



Luke Perry's birthday, of course!


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Luke Perry's birthday, of course!


hehe, invite all the closet cases, and it's a massive joygasm of a party :3


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

NekoFox08 said:


> hehe, invite all the closet cases, and it's a massive joygasm of a party :3



Was that seriously it

fuck I just picked the most obscure thing I could find


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Luke Perry's birthday, of course!



Actually, it's OUR anniversary. *waggles eyebrows suggestively*


----------



## NekoFox08 (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Was that seriously it
> 
> fuck I just picked the most obscure thing I could find


:neutral:


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

AlexInsane said:


> Actually, it's OUR anniversary. *waggles eyebrows suggestively*



>:\



NekoFox08 said:


> :neutral:



Holy fuck


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Luke Perry's birthday, of course!


 
And five days after mine! =^.^= *wags tail*


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

Adelio Altomar said:


> And five days after mine! =^.^= *wags tail*



You mean _ours_. |3


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 2, 2008)

*sobs* 

How COULD YOU, David.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

AlexInsane said:


> *sobs*
> 
> How COULD YOU, David.



Adelio and I are twins, stupid.


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Adelio and I are twins, stupid.



Orly?

Well, fuck me silly.

Please.

Please?


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

AlexInsane said:


> Orly?
> 
> Well, fuck me silly.
> 
> ...



Come back when you're a little MMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM gayer


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Dec 2, 2008)

AlexInsane said:


> Orly?
> 
> Well, fuck me silly.
> 
> ...


 
Yeesh! And I though I w-... uh... saw desperate. :3


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Come back when you're a little MMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM gayer



*grows a crack-addict mustache*

MY GAY LEVELS HAVE GONE OVER 9000


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 2, 2008)

evilteddybear said:


> This helped, and yet at the same time made me more apprehensive about the whole thing....


|3

Just learn from my mistakes and you'll be just fine.

Also,


			
				Takumi_L said:
			
		

> I humbly ask that this thread stay clean and ask that it be taken seriously, that people stay on topic, and maybe we can do some good on this forum.



>:C


----------



## brrrr (Dec 2, 2008)

Midi Bear said:


> *snip*


Very awesome how you managed to pull yourself out of that.


Midi Bear said:


> However, that summer, I got the hots for one of the friends that stuck with me from the last clique... and it was a girl. So I had like "FUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHKKK!!! I must be bi.


Haha same thing happened to me. When I was 13 I came to the conclusion that I was gay. Several years later girls start getting attractive and I go out with a few (two) and I'm like damn now I gotta rethink this whole thing through. It's gotten to the point now that I find women to be more sexually attractive than guys. 

Despite that, I really don't see myself ever being in a longterm relationship with a woman. I feel like I can be myself much more around guys than I can girls, and I feel much more comfortable being in a relationship with a guy. So I don't know what to classify myself as, at this point. I'm kind of all over the chart.


----------



## Takun (Dec 2, 2008)

brrrr said:


> Very awesome how you managed to pull yourself out of that.
> 
> Haha same thing happened to me. When I was 13 I came to the conclusion that I was gay. Several years later girls start getting attractive and I go out with a few (two) and I'm like damn now I gotta rethink this whole thing through. It's gotten to the point now that I find women to be more sexually attractive than guys.
> 
> Despite that, I really don't see myself ever being in a longterm relationship with a woman. I feel like I can be myself much more around guys than I can girls, and I feel much more comfortable being in a relationship with a guy. So I don't know what to classify myself as, at this point. I'm kind of all over the chart.



I know a lot of guys like that.  They have the sexual attraction to both but rather have the relationship with a guy.

Personally I have a rather manageable sexy drive.  I've never understood stripclubs or sexual marketing.  Maybe I'm broken :O  But I know someone I do love :3


----------



## .Ein. (Dec 2, 2008)

I came out after a severe breakdown in late August of this year.  People are a little too patronizing about it here; I'd much rather no one knew just because I don't think it's any of their (honk!)ing business.  No one seems to believe it/want to believe it.  I'm the only one in my family who could carry the name.

But I hate children. 

They all hate me more than they did in the first place.  And it's mutual. <3


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 2, 2008)

I think it's wonderful how this thread has got people to open up and talk about their experiences.


----------



## brrrr (Dec 2, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> I know a lot of guys like that.  They have the sexual attraction to both but rather have the relationship with a guy.
> 
> Personally I have a rather manageable sexy drive.  I've never understood stripclubs or sexual marketing.  Maybe I'm broken :O  But I know someone I do love :3


Guys are much more humble in my opinion. Around girls it feels like you're walking on broken glass the entire time. You get an earfull if you slip up. Not just from my experience but from also watching my sister and her boyfriend, and my friends' girlfriends. It's like you're in the best position to just keep your mouth shut the entire time because the spotlight should be on your girl, and I don't like that.

This is going to come off as entirely chauvenistic, but I'd be much more willing to enter a longterm relationship with a girl if they knew how to stop talking once in a while : V


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 2, 2008)

Isn't that like saying "I'd like a long term relationship with a humanoid fleshy doll."?


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Isn't that like saying "I'd like a long term relationship with a humanoid fleshy doll."?



Once in a while, he said.  But...


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 2, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Once in a while, he said.  But...



Phail.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Phail.



No.  You're an idiot.

Even more so for spelling "Fail" with a ph.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 2, 2008)

Your hotlink doesn't work. And it is spelled with a ph.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 2, 2008)

Your hotlink doesn't work. And it is spelled with a ph. What sound does ph make? Exactly. Plus whenever you type the letter F you kill a baby in Africa.


----------



## Takun (Dec 2, 2008)

Impossible to keep on topic.  Quite sad.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Your hotlink doesn't work. And it is spelled with a ph.



I can see it just fine.  Maybe you're just retarded.



Ren-Raku said:


> And it is spelled with a ph. What sound does ph make? Exactly. Plus whenever you type the letter F you kill a baby in Africa.



The dictionary says that you are retarded.

Also

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 2, 2008)

Murderer!


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 2, 2008)

Euthanasia is a good thing.

Back on topic please, this thread used to be great.


----------



## brrrr (Dec 2, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Isn't that like saying "I'd like a long term relationship with a humanoid fleshy doll."?


I love the extremes you immediately jump to good sir.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 2, 2008)

so um coming out.

Yeah. I told some friends. They still love me. I'm happy.


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 2, 2008)

I told one of my friends on Sunday night, and she can't even remember... -__-


----------



## Takun (Dec 2, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> I told one of my friends on Sunday night, and she can't even remember... -__-




Give them time...Sometimes people for get when it really doesn't bother them much.


----------



## brrrr (Dec 2, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> I told one of my friends on Sunday night, and she can't even remember... -__-


or she's just faking it (lol) 

Some people's best ways to act like it's not a big deal is to play it off as it barely phased them. Which is good and bad. It's better she toned it down than overreacted about it.


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 2, 2008)

No, she's just strange like that. She actually cannot remember us telling her. She has said many times that she'd be fine with whatever sexuality I am. And she was fine with it when we told her, although she _was_ half asleep...


----------



## FoxxLegend (Dec 2, 2008)

I told a few people that my ex knows that I was truly Bi and they were cool with it. My ex even found that made me extra sexy to her. She still loves me even now. But seeing how it was difficult to maintain a relationship with her cause she wanted to stay serious and live then finally die with me. Being split almost precisely between men and women just didn't let me be comfortable with that. It was cute for awhile though cause it was more like I was the female and she was the supportive male.


----------



## Digitalpotato (Dec 2, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> So do you think you'd fall in love (not sexually) with a girl after donating sperm and having it artificially insemenated into her womb?



errr didn't I say that earlier, some asexuals do have sex and are married? >.>


Besides I'd rather adopt.


----------



## Nargle (Dec 2, 2008)

I think the first person I came out to was an online friend. Then, after a few years, I asked a girl out (Obviously I came out to her, too XD) Then later I told my current boyfriend, only to suddenly realize that the girl I asked out a while back told all of my friends  Needless to say I was upset with her, but nobody's attitude towards me changed, so I'm happy about that =3 Some people thought it was neat! My boyfriend definitely enjoys looking at pictures of hot girls with me, and chatting about mall ass and the like X3

I haven't told my mom, though, just because of the awkwardness. I'm pretty much 100% sure she'd be fine, though. Heck, there's even a rumor that she's a lesbian and that's why my parents got a divorce! (I don't really feel like it's my place to ask, though) But anyways, there's no reason to tell her, because I plan on staying with my boyfriend for a rather long time =3 But if something were to happen to him (ARG I don't even like typing that ;.; ) and I ended up with a girl, then I suppose I'd let her know.

BTW, People who think bisexuals can't be faithful are stupid >=( I've never ever dreamed of cheating on anyone I've been with, and I never will. That's like saying straight people can't stay faithful to their white wives because they have a thing for Asian chicks, too, and white chicks can't satisfy their needs. Which is also ridiculous. So... yeah.


----------



## evilteddybear (Dec 3, 2008)

Easog said:


> |3
> 
> Just learn from my mistakes and you'll be just fine.


... Oh, that is reassuring...


----------



## Tweek (Dec 3, 2008)

I let people know when I'm ready to let them in as a close friend, because they're gonna find out quickly anyhow. I've lost a couple friends that way, but most of them have been fine with it, and it's changed a lot of perceptions for the better. I've even told my parents, numerous times, and it took about four years for them to stop denying it but they eventually did.

Also, thanks for posting this Takumi, you rock <3 <3 <3


----------



## Hyenaworks (Dec 3, 2008)

There was a time I considered it, more out of the frequency of males flirting with me as opposed to females(who basically don't).  When it comes down to it(no pun intended), the male sex doesn't arouse me sexually.  So while I may have great affection for various male friends in my life, it's not the same as that carnal desire to have nasty sex with a woman.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 3, 2008)

Tbh, I didn't "Come out" as such, I just accepted that I'm bi, and that it's natural for me.


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 3, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Tbh, I didn't "Come out" as such, I just accepted that I'm bi, and that it's natural for me.


that is comming out lol - accepting your sexuality and/or telling friends/family etc


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 3, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> that is comming out lol - accepting your sexuality and/or telling friends/family etc


 

I always assumed that "coming out" it to do with telling everybody else


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 3, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> I always assumed that "coming out" it to do with telling everybody else


nope, it can be to yourself, or other people


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 3, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> mrredfox said:
> 
> 
> > mrredfox said:
> ...


 

Fair enough.


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 4, 2008)

evilteddybear said:


> ... Oh, that is reassuring...


More and more I get the feeling you want to be in the closet forever.


----------



## evilteddybear (Dec 4, 2008)

Easog said:


> More and more I get the feeling you want to be in the closet forever.


More and more, that seems like more of a solution... I really don't though... I just have no way of coming out, without sudden evil backlash...


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 4, 2008)

I still haven't come out to my parents. I've been meaning to, but there hasn't been a situation where it would be relevant. And I'm not just going to go "Oh hey mum. By the way, I'm Bi."
But I _did_ write a poem/song about it last night, which I could also show to them when I _do_ come out.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 4, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> I still haven't come out to my parents. I've been meaning to, but there hasn't been a situation where it would be relevant. And I'm not just going to go "Oh hey mum. By the way, I'm Bi."
> But I _did_ write a poem/song about it last night, which I could also show to them when I _do_ come out.



Depending on how obvious the lyrics are, I'd just leave it lying about somewhere :3


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 4, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> I still haven't come out to my parents. I've been meaning to, but there hasn't been a situation where it would be relevant. And I'm not just going to go "Oh hey mum. By the way, I'm Bi."
> But I _did_ write a poem/song about it last night, which I could also show to them when I _do_ come out.



Does it contain the words "what what in the butt"?


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 4, 2008)

Replace "What what" with "Who's penis".


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 4, 2008)

Yeah, so it doesn't leave any room for doubt when he's singing it to his parents.


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 4, 2008)

you can just imagine that, you burst into the living room, Mother, Father i shall now commence my ballad, tis entitled "im a fag" in E minor ...


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 4, 2008)

I would pay to see that. It should be filmed and posted as link of the day.


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 4, 2008)

SnowFox said:


> I would pay to see that. It should be filmed and posted as link of the day.


hmm mabey i shall film that..


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 4, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> hmm mabey i shall film that..



That's what she said.

What do you get if you push a piano down a coal shaft? 



Spoiler



A-flat minor (miner)


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 4, 2008)

did the tasteless jokes thread get removed too?


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 4, 2008)

Nope, at that joke has no place there :3


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 4, 2008)

that joke was poor, i think it should be you in the metal cage.


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 4, 2008)

"Hey mum, I'm a fag" - the musical

I'd watch it


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 4, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> that joke was poor, i think it should be you in the metal cage.



Depends who has the key...if it's someone merciful, then forget it :3


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 4, 2008)

SnowFox said:


> "Hey mum, I'm a fag" - the musical
> 
> I'd watch it


FUCK..YES i can see it now! the lights.. the audeince... the music! Oh it would be just super!


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 4, 2008)

SnowFox said:


> "Hey mum, I'm a fag" - the musical
> 
> I'd watch it



Isn't that the shit that Disney have been pumping out recently?


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 4, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Isn't that the shit that Disney have been pumping out recently?



Something like that. I think its "Hey kids look at me, I'm a shiny-faced high school person with the most annoying cheesy smile EVER, now learn these songs and repeatedly sing them to yourself to keep the annoyance alive even after this film is over" - the musical


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 4, 2008)

SnowFox said:


> Something like that. I think its "Hey kids look at me, I'm a shiny-faced high school person with the most annoying cheesy smile EVER, now learn these songs and repeatedly sing them to yourself to keep the annoyance alive even after this film is over" - the musical


no its more like "hey everyone, my name is zach and im the biggest faggot douche in the history of ever! we are at highschool for like 3 years and all we do is sing and play shitty basketball and sing in musicals and sing, and when we go to college were going to sing more nad play more basketball and show the world how awesome we are at singing and playing basketball" - the musical


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 4, 2008)

Sounds about right.


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 4, 2008)

This is quite possibly without a doubt the most useful thread concept to have ever existed on these forums. Can we stay on topic for like, a page?

Protip: Facebook came in handy for coming out to my friends, rather than find everyone I knew and create a lot of awkward situations, I just set my relationship status and let them figure it out.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 4, 2008)

I don't want to tell everyone just in case it's a phase or something.


----------



## ProgramFiles (Dec 4, 2008)

One of my friends teacher say that a tenager have generally 1 homosexual trip with a friend or someone, even if they are straight.

Thats weird, him straight, him not gonna say OMG GAY ARE ASSH*LE C*CK S*CKER but him not sexually attracted to male person like me...and i don't think it will change


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 4, 2008)

Just in case anyone's wondering, your sexuality is pretty much solidified by the age of 20, so there's always a chance of something changing before then.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 4, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Just in case anyone's wondering, your sexuality is pretty much solidified by the age of 20, so there's always a chance of something changing before then.


Sauce?


----------



## evilteddybear (Dec 4, 2008)

Easog said:


> This is quite possibly without a doubt the most useful thread concept to have ever existed on these forums. Can we stay on topic for like, a page?


^this


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 4, 2008)

bozzles said:


> Sauce?



Dr. Spencer's Human Sexual Behavior class at Arizona State University.


----------



## Nylak (Dec 4, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Just in case anyone's wondering, your sexuality is pretty much solidified by the age of 20, so there's always a chance of something changing before then.


 
Damn it, it's too late for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 4, 2008)

Nylak said:


> Damn it, it's too late for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!



Aren't you bisexual?


----------



## bozzles (Dec 4, 2008)

how do i became strait?


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 4, 2008)

bozzles said:


> how do i became strait?



By sucking my dick.


----------



## bozzles (Dec 4, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> By sucking my dick.


I'll give it a try.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 4, 2008)

bozzles said:


> I'll give it a try.



:awesome:


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 4, 2008)

IT'S A TRAP


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 5, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Dr. Spencer's Human Sexual Behavior class at Arizona State University.


 Um what? My name is Spencer, but I'm not a doctor, and I don't give a class on Sexual Behaviour at Arizona State University... << >>


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 5, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> Um what? My name is Spencer, but I'm not a doctor, and I don't give a class on Sexual Behaviour at Arizona State University... << >>



Shut up


----------



## Hydramon (Dec 5, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Shut up


Not until you stop derailing good threads like this one.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 5, 2008)

bozzles said:


> how do i became strait?



No way to really change something by choice imo, it's whatever feels natural to you, and if that means getting it up over guys, then so be it. I don't really mind that I've been aroused by guys before, it's just what I felt comfortable with at the time. On an unrelated note, lets all make this thread sticky...Very sticky!


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 5, 2008)

Hydramon said:


> Not until you stop derailing good threads like this one.



I wasn't derailing this thread, you stupid cunt, I was giving relevant factual information that I learned in one of my university courses from Doctor S. Spencer.  Now shut up and kill yourself.


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 5, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> No way to really change something by choice imo, it's whatever feels natural to you, and if that means getting it up over guys, then so be it. I don't really mind that I've been aroused by guys before, it's just what I felt comfortable with at the time. On an unrelated note, lets all make this thread sticky...Very sticky!


ok lets do it. i got some mayo in my truck we could use


----------



## Imperial Impact (Dec 5, 2008)

So yeah, I came out last month to my brother. .-.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 5, 2008)

Lets all come, out of our penises? :3


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 5, 2008)

Perverted Impact said:


> So yeah, I came out last month to my brother. .-.


How'd that go?



Ren-Raku said:


> Lets all come, out of our penises? :3


Okay, when this gets to page 13, let's _try_ to stay on topic. Seriously, useful and important thread here. Changed lives when it was on Yiffstar.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 5, 2008)

Apologies :3


----------



## SnowFox (Dec 5, 2008)

The story in the OP looks familiar, I'm sure I've read it somewhere before maybe a year or 2 ago. Does anyone know where it came from originally?



			
				Ren-Raku said:
			
		

> Lets all come, out of our penises? :3


I already did. 3 times in half an hour!


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 5, 2008)

SnowFox said:


> The story in the OP looks familiar, I'm sure I've read it somewhere before maybe a year or 2 ago. Does anyone know where it came from originally?
> 
> 
> I already did. 3 times in half an hour!



I have a boner


----------



## Imperial Impact (Dec 5, 2008)

Easog said:


> How'd that go?


Well, I told him that "whatever he likes I like".Then My brother told me not to do that because he doesn't want me to get hurt...


----------



## StainMcGorver (Dec 5, 2008)

Wow.




Holy shit.




This article makes straight people look like we abuse gay people.


----------



## Imperial Impact (Dec 5, 2008)

What do you mean?


----------



## StainMcGorver (Dec 5, 2008)

Takumi_L said:


> "Okay, it is no secret that there are a lot of gay, bisexual, and confused furries out there in the fandom."
> *
> "Do you think you might be gay?*"
> 
> ...


I stopped reading right around here.

Also, gay people aren't any more special than anyone else. -20 for Yiffstar.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 5, 2008)

StainMcGorver said:


> Wow.
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Guess what

lots of them do


----------



## Huey (Dec 5, 2008)

I'm somewhere between coming out, staying in, and realizing that there's not a closet altogether. Knamean?

I have issues.


----------



## StainMcGorver (Dec 5, 2008)

David M. Awesome said:


> Guess what
> 
> lots of them do


YEA I KNOW.

Guess what

i hate furries


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 5, 2008)

StainMcGorver said:


> YEA I KNOW.
> 
> Guess what
> 
> i hate furries



I guess you'd better just kill yourself then!


----------



## electmeking (Dec 5, 2008)

StainMcGorver said:


> This article makes straight people look like we abuse gay people.



Guess what.



StainMcGorver said:


> I stopped reading right around here.
> 
> Also, gay people aren't any more special than anyone else. -20 for Yiffstar.



 You dont have to believe or agree with everything you read on the internet.
 Case Point:



David M. Awesome said:


> I guess you'd better just kill yourself then!



Probably not a good idea.


----------



## StainMcGorver (Dec 5, 2008)

electmeking said:


> Guess what.


Chicken butt?


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 5, 2008)

StainMcGorver said:


> Chicken butt?



No, a vagina.

I WENT OFF TOPIC, OHSHIT


----------



## StainMcGorver (Dec 5, 2008)

Oh God... no!


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 5, 2008)

AlexInsane said:


> No, a vagina.
> 
> I WENT OFF TOPIC, OHSHIT


Bend over, Alex >:C


----------



## Enigmaticat (Dec 5, 2008)

Easog said:


> Bend over, Alex >:C


Be careful, he'll abuse you.


----------



## StainMcGorver (Dec 5, 2008)

This thread needs moar trollage.


----------



## Tweek (Dec 5, 2008)

Perverted Impact said:


> Well, I told him that "whatever he likes I like".Then My brother told me not to do that because he doesn't want me to get hurt...


 
   Is he gay too? I think that would be cool, personally.



StainMcGorver said:


> Wow. Holy shit. This article makes straight people look like we abuse gay people.



A very small minority, yes. A decent number of people are uncomfortable regarding the subject though, so this is more about acceptance rather than abuse.



StainMcGorver said:


> YEA I KNOW. Guess what i hate furries


 
    OMG BURNED FURS AND SELF LOATHING.



StainMcGorver said:


> This thread needs moar trollage.


 
   You're doing pretty well by yourself. This is supposed to be a serious and useful thread; go sit in the corner please.


----------



## PriestRevan (Dec 6, 2008)

Oh God no, I'd never be willing to tell my parents I'm bi. I have a huge, 250 lb black f, ghetto-ass dad and a country born and raised mother (both democrats and somewhat Christians). 

My mom might be easier to tell, since she's friends with a lesbian woman, but my dad...
 Well, lets just say that he's not one to like gay's. He constantly calls them "fags" and whatnot when they're on the tv. He doesn't have anything against gays, as in like marriage or anything, he just doesn't like 'em. 

As much as the idea of being with a male sounds nice, well... I don't really have the luxury to do so. 

I also feel I shouldn't let them down by being with a guy. I mean, I'm their only child/son. I shouldn't be bi, I shouldn't like guys. I should love women and want "normal" families and stuff. *sigh* Freakin' tough choices.


----------



## Tweek (Dec 6, 2008)

PriestRevan said:


> I also feel I shouldn't let them down by being with a guy. I mean, I'm their only child/son. I shouldn't be bi, I shouldn't like guys. I should love women and want "normal" families and stuff. *sigh* Freakin' tough choices.



Do what makes *you* happy. I'm mostly gay but find a select few women attractive, and I'm an only child, but I still date boys. What you do with your life should have _nothing_ to do with how your parents want you to be, but with what feels right to you.


----------



## PriestRevan (Dec 6, 2008)

Tweek said:


> Do what makes *you* happy. I'm mostly gay but find a select few women attractive, and I'm an only child, but I still date boys. What you do with your life should have _nothing_ to do with how your parents want you to be, but with what feels right to you.


 

I mean, it's not to say I haven't found any females attractive, but it's is to say I can't picture myself in a straight relationship (other than to have kids). 

I can easily picture myself in a gay relationship, but my life has been spent making my parents as happy as I can. Being gay is_ not _making them happy. I need not to be shunned by my family, it wont make me happy.


----------



## evilteddybear (Dec 6, 2008)

PriestRevan said:


> Being gay is_ not _making them happy. I need not to be shunned by my family, it wont make me happy.


I know what you mean .-.


----------



## AlexInsane (Dec 6, 2008)

Silibus said:


> Be careful, he'll abuse you.



I'll rip his dick off with my toothed bowels of Hell. >:3


----------



## Takun (Dec 6, 2008)

StainMcGorver said:


> I stopped reading right around here.
> 
> Also, gay people aren't any more special than anyone else. -20 for Yiffstar.



But we do have to go through that.  My parents are still dealing with my not living the "normal" life.  The article is very true.  We aren't any more special, but we still have to deal with this and the consequences.  But you wouldn't know about going through that, because you haven't had to.


----------



## DarkTalbain64 (Dec 6, 2008)

I see this is a helpful thread to people, it should be stickied.


----------



## Thatch (Dec 6, 2008)

electmeking said:


> Probably not a good idea.



I beg to differ.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 6, 2008)

DarkTalbain64 said:


> I see this is a helpful thread to people, it should be stickied.



^ This.



DarkTalbain64 said:


> I see this is a helpful thread to people, it should be stickied.



^ This.



DarkTalbain64 said:


> I see this is a helpful thread to people, it should be stickied.



^ And this.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 6, 2008)

PriestRevan said:


> As much as the idea of being with a male sounds nice, well... I don't really have the luxury to do so.
> 
> I also feel I shouldn't let them down by being with a guy. I mean, I'm their only child/son. I shouldn't be bi, I shouldn't like guys. I should love women and want "normal" families and stuff. *sigh* Freakin' tough choices.



I feel like this sometimes, too.  And then I get to thinking about it and always end up deciding that it's my life to do whatever I want with, and I could care less what anybody else thinks I should be doing.



Tweek said:


> Do what makes *you* happy. I'm mostly gay but find a select few women attractive, and I'm an only child, but I still date boys. What you do with your life should have _nothing_ to do with how your parents want you to be, but with what feels right to you.



Word.



PriestRevan said:


> I can easily picture myself in a gay relationship, but my life has been spent making my parents as happy as I can. Being gay is_ not _making them happy. I need not to be shunned by my family, it wont make me happy.



Well that's a problem right there.  I personally have the benefit of not giving a shit about my family (aside from my brother), so I'm able to do pretty much whatever I like with my life.


----------



## Jack_Haystack (Dec 6, 2008)

meh... bi-curious with virtually no one knowing (though thats regretfully about to change due to a pain in the a** at school) and I would not want my parents knowing but I think my sister would be great with it XP


----------



## Imperial Impact (Dec 6, 2008)

Tweek said:


> Is he gay too? I think that would be cool, personally.


 Me and him are bi.


----------



## Ren-Raku (Dec 6, 2008)

Perverted Impact said:


> Me and him are bi.


 

Not together ofc


----------



## Imperial Impact (Dec 6, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Not together ofc


 Obv. >_>


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 6, 2008)

Ren-Raku said:


> Not together ofc



Do not know if want


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 6, 2008)

Tweek said:


> You're doing pretty well by yourself. This is supposed to be a serious and useful thread; go sit in the corner please.


I like you, stick around. 



PriestRevan said:


> I need not to be shunned by my family, it wont make me happy.


I've heard that most of the time families do come around and at least tolerate their children's sexuality... after all, they are their children. 

Maybe they'll never fully accept it, but this might be a case where you can't have your cake and eat it too, you'll have to choose between being yourself and making your family happy. Besides, if you eventually end up with the same sex, you're going to want them to know, right?


----------



## PriestRevan (Dec 6, 2008)

Easog said:


> I've heard that most of the time families do come around and at least tolerate their children's sexuality... after all, they are their children.
> 
> Maybe they'll never fully accept it, but this might be a case where you can't have your cake and eat it too, you'll have to choose between being yourself and making your family happy. Besides, if you eventually end up with the same sex, you're going to want them to know, right?


 
Ah, naaah man. My family is pure ghetto ass trash, Jehova's Witnesses, and Baptists. I mean, my parents are one thing, but my whole family. My dad has 12 brothers and sisters and god knows how many uncles and aunts. Each one of them has around... 2-4 kids. That's alot of family, and in a black family like mine, information spreads really quick. 

Shiiit. 

My mom would probably be okay with it, once I tell her I still plan on giving her some grandkids. But my dad, he's... a little rough around the edges. Me and him have always been indifferent to each others opinions. He loves football, I like soccer. He loves Mustangs, I like Volvo's. He likes "The Wire", I like "Spongebob Squarepants". I don't need to be anymore different to him.


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 6, 2008)

PriestRevan said:


> Ah, naaah man. My family is pure ghetto ass trash, Jehova's Witnesses, and Baptists. I mean, my parents are one thing, but my whole family. My dad has 12 brothers and sisters and god knows how many uncles and aunts. Each one of them has around... 2-4 kids. That's alot of family, and in a black family like mine, information spreads really quick.
> 
> Shiiit.
> 
> My mom would probably be okay with it, once I tell her I still plan on giving her some grandkids. But my dad, he's... a little rough around the edges. Me and him have always been indifferent to each others opinions. He loves football, I like soccer. He loves Mustangs, I like Volvo's. He likes "The Wire", I like "Spongebob Squarepants". I don't need to be anymore different to him.


dont tell them
move out and never speak to them again (if you havent already done so) 
???
profit!


----------



## PriestRevan (Dec 6, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> dont tell them
> move out and never speak to them again (if you havent already done so)
> ???
> profit!


 
Yeesh, that would probably suck more. Lol.

Yeah, that would be a _great _way to thank my parents for paying for my college.


----------



## Dyluck (Dec 6, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> dont tell them
> move out and never speak to them again (if you havent already done so)
> ???
> profit!



That's all well and good for those of us who don't give a damn about our families, but it's really not an option for everyone, you know?


----------



## mrredfox (Dec 6, 2008)

PriestRevan said:


> Yeesh, that would probably suck more. Lol.
> 
> Yeah, that would be a _great _way to thank my parents for paying for my college.


if they have rooms on campus... get them to pay for it, then when you move out, and litterally out of the door just say "oh yeah by the way im gay, BYE!"


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## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Dec 6, 2008)

Ouch, that's quite the situation you have there. >_o

Well, in the end it'll all come down to whether you want your happiness or theirs to take precedence. It's probably best to remain in the closet for now, or at least until you're moved out of home or in a relationship. Before then, it's probably not worth risking their disapproval while you're still under their roof.


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## Dyluck (Dec 6, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> if they have rooms on campus... get them to pay for it, then when you move out, and litterally out of the door just say "oh yeah by the way im gay, BYE!"



Why don't you try offering some advice that doesn't suck?


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## PriestRevan (Dec 6, 2008)

mrredfox said:


> if they have rooms on campus... get them to pay for it, then when you move out, and litterally out of the door just say "oh yeah by the way im gay, BYE!"


 
Then you gotta consider that you might not make it in the real world on your own at first.

Would kinda blow if you had to move back in with 'em, huh?


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## Ren-Raku (Dec 6, 2008)

Moo.


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## roflcopter23 (Jan 2, 2009)

Although this thread is unquestionably useful, I'm still finding myself in a sort of a pickle. I'm not sure whether I'm heterosexual or bisexual, I don't know if I want to find out, and i don't know what I would do even if I did find out.

I come from a very tight family. My brother, sister and I are triplets, three of a kind. We've grown up together and have been through many great adventures. My parents have stuck through with us and helped us all out in our time of need and I cherish the relationship I've had with my family. After we moved thousands of miles away from our old country, I realized that they are all I have left. No friends, or relatives, just them. And there's also a considerable amount of "gay jokes" and what-not specially in high school. Although i'm almost done with it (thank God)... which brings me to my second point.

I'm Roman Catholic. Being gay, or bisexual is a sin in my belief system. Although i've always considered myself to be more spiritual than religious, it's hard to ignore something like "going to hell" for having these feelings. And I really have to consider if it's worth finding the answer and realizing I'm through for a simple 60 years of life instead of just keeping it to myself.

Another very big problem is that my brother, who is my closest friend, is homophobic. And i don't mean "Ew i hate gay people homophobic", i mean "I'm going to kill every gay person I meet in my life" homophobic. Please don't get the wrong idea, my brother is a very nice and sensible guy, he isn't comfortable around gays. I dont know whether I want to take a chance with him or my family. Speaking hypothetically, if i do find out that i'm bisexual, I wouldn't risk my realtionship with my family for a thousand d****s or a thousand c***s.

On the other hand, I need to stop beating around the bush. I need to face the music. There are just so many things on the line and even though i've read some amazing stories about people who made it... I'm not sure whether it will be the case with me. I've already come out to my parents that I'm a furry and they seem to be getting many misconceptions. Now, in my desperation, i turn to this forum, which is my last chance of saving myself and living with myself. Whether I'm Bi or not. 

I guess I dont want to be gay or bisexual. I just want to b staight. And it's getting harder to satisfy my desires. I've tried making them go away and heck (being the spiritual person that i am) even tried praying them away but with no result! Yeah call me pathetic.




*I hope someone will take the time to read my story and maybe give me some circumstantial advice or help.*

Cheers all.


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## Lemon_Panda (Jan 3, 2009)

4-5 years ago I came out to my mother about being bisexual. I had a crush on this one girl who was one year older than me and it was strong enough to make me seriously question my sexuality. Along with this, I was in a minor (I can't call it an actual relationship because I was young) relationship with a guy whom I did like a lot. Couple this with a messy night I had at a friend's house during a sleepover and it was pretty firm that I liked girls 'in that way' along with guys.

She treated me different after that and brought up my sexuality when she saw fit. This stressed me out because I found it unfair and frankly mean when she used something I had confided in her against me. So I told her it was just a phase and that I didn't really like girls like that anymore. Since then, I've been in a relationship with two other guys (long-term and one that I just got into) so I guess she did believe me. 

I consider myself pansexual more than anything, though. I would like a person if they were transgendered or whatever. I don't let the gender of a person get in the way of my love for them.


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## Fox Glove (Jan 3, 2009)

Weeeelp. 

When I was in 7th grade I had a tall, blonde, busty friend named Maranda. I really enjoyed her company to be honest. She was smart, funny, and over time I noticed she was extremely...beautiful. I finally started crying myself to sleep one night when I realized while I'd always thought girls were prettier than boys but I convinced myself I loved teh cawk, I really really felt something for Maranda. I couldn't hold it any longer as I realized I loved her in a romantic way and I thought she was beautiful. I didn't know how to tell her. Finally, in a cheesy, stupid way, I bought her a beautiful card for her birthday and wrote her a long letter about my feelings. She avoided me for a few days and then finally she told me she was like...asexual or something, because she had no interest in sex at all. She was cool with it. 

So after a year I decided I was indeed bisexual, no flip-flopping around. But I still loved some guys. Maranda moved away and I met Morgan. She was the second girl I came out to, and she came out to me as well. We were weird, she was a cheerleader cookie cutter kind of girl, and I was a weird, creepy, kinda gothy person. Anyway, we were alone in the house playing truth or dare and we pecked on the lips...and uh. Well. Mutual masturbation ensued, but we never went anywhere with it. And I didn't feel like I loved her. Anyway, moving on, I dated a guy yeah, that ended badly, and of course later in the year a bisexual girl in my home economics class came out to everyone, and no one cared. So I decided to come out to her, and someone overheard me telling her and told EVERYONE. Panic ensues, and the pack of girls that freaking hated me literally SHIVERED and hid in the corner of the room, where some literally cried because they were apparently scared that I wanted to rape them or something. It was reminiscient of how kids in elementary school told me how I had a mental disease and no one could touch me. Everyone avoided me in those years. Never touched me. If I touched a tray, everyone had to take the tray under the tray I touched to make sure I hadn't contaminated them. I thought I was sincerely over that part of my life, but sadly, I was being treated like I had a disease all over again. Girls would come up to me and ask me if they were hot. If I said yes they'd run away and claim I was trying to molest them. If I said no they yelled at me for not calling them pretty. It was a total lose lose. So I just said, "I think everyone's pretty, in their own little way." which was incidentally kind of true.

Boyfriend ensues, break up ensues. yadda yadda. Anyway, in high school it seemed like, HOLY SHIT, NO ONE CARES! Except, this one girl who is literally retarded. She can function, but damn she is special ed material. Anyway, she would constantly claim to other people that I was trying to molest her and I thought she was hot, and frankly, I hated her. So hard. Finally she took it up another notch and started hitting me. Literally she would hit me across the head and chase me and call me a dyke, and the one time I stood up to her and called her a bitch, I was about to punch her in the face when a teacher came to TEH RESSSCUUUUEE and said I would be expelled if I ever touched her, because she's a poor special ed wittle baby and she can do whatever she wants. Finally, after having enough of holding back on kicking her ass, I told the school what was happening. Unfortunately, this meant I had to come out to the principal. I thought he was cool about it, next day my stepdad gives me a lecture about how I shouldn't be gay. The school had called my parents, just to tell them I'm bi. How sweet. Anyway, the retard beating on me ceased.

After that, it's like, golly gee whizz, no one gave a flying fuck. Not even most of my teachers. The only recent problem I've had is parents continuing lectures about how I shouldn't convert to pussy and how I need to pop out grandkids for them because my oldest sister may have popped em out but they are low on grandkids because two of my other siblings are gay, and one retarded chick thought I had a crush on her but I finally told her, "Dude, you're nice, but I'll never like you in a million years, because you're STRAIGHT." and I had a nice little talk about how just because I'm bisexual doesn't mean I like every girl I see.

So yeah, at this point, I go through periods where I like TEH PUSSY, and periods where I want TEH CAWK pretty badly. I think all in all I still prefer teh cawk, but either gender is beginning to become hard to bear in a relationship. I also have developed a rather strange fetish for liking men that are a little bit feminine in features. And dickgirls. ([sub]and my ridiculously hot stepbrother[/sub]) Most of my friends and family know I'm bi, family hardly discusses it out of awkwardness, and friends don't care.

I've also decided that I'm not popping out kids no matter what gender I end up with forever if I even end up with someone forever, and even if I end up wanting kids I'm going to ADOPT. Apparently this concept is even harder on my parents than the possibility of having another lesbian child, so YEAH, have to work on that whole coming out as child free.


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## Hollow-Dragon (Jan 3, 2009)

roflcopter23 said:


> Although this thread is unquestionably useful, I'm still finding myself in a sort of a pickle. I'm not sure whether I'm heterosexual or bisexual, I don't know if I want to find out, and i don't know what I would do even if I did find out.
> 
> I come from a very tight family. My brother, sister and I are triplets, three of a kind. We've grown up together and have been through many great adventures. My parents have stuck through with us and helped us all out in our time of need and I cherish the relationship I've had with my family. After we moved thousands of miles away from our old country, I realized that they are all I have left. No friends, or relatives, just them. And there's also a considerable amount of "gay jokes" and what-not specially in high school. Although i'm almost done with it (thank God)... which brings me to my second point.
> 
> ...


 
It's really up to you whether you want to tell your family or not.  If you don't feel comfortable or that it's just not the right time, then don't tell them just yet.  Otherwise, go for it.  I know how it is. My dad's pretty homophobic and my mom's kinda "eh...".  I haven't even told them I'm a fur, let alone gay.  So you're one step ahead of me.


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## brrrr (Jan 3, 2009)

roflcopter23 said:


> Although this thread is unquestionably useful, I'm still finding myself in a sort of a pickle. I'm not sure whether I'm heterosexual or bisexual, I don't know if I want to find out, and i don't know what I would do even if I did find out.
> 
> I come from a very tight family. My brother, sister and I are triplets, three of a kind. We've grown up together and have been through many great adventures. My parents have stuck through with us and helped us all out in our time of need and I cherish the relationship I've had with my family. After we moved thousands of miles away from our old country, I realized that they are all I have left. No friends, or relatives, just them. And there's also a considerable amount of "gay jokes" and what-not specially in high school. Although i'm almost done with it (thank God)... which brings me to my second point.
> 
> ...


I would definitely solidify the fact of whether or not you're bisexual, before worrying about how to deal with the consequences (that is, coming out to your family)

That's a really difficult predicament you're in, though. From my point of view, it definitely seems like you're trying to cover up your true feelings about it out of respect to your family and your spiritual beliefs. I'm not saying it's wrong, and I give you credit for having as much faith as you do in your life.

All I can say is try to be true to yourself. You shouldn't hide your sexuality from yourself. Once you know the answer to that then you can decide what you want to do about it. Whether follow through with your sexuality or learn to condition it so that it agrees with your lifestyle and beliefs.


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## LizardKing (Jan 3, 2009)

lol fags


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## roflcopter23 (Jan 3, 2009)

brrrr said:


> I would definitely solidify the fact of whether or not you're bisexual, before worrying about how to deal with the consequences (that is, coming out to your family)
> 
> That's a really difficult predicament you're in, though. From my point of view, it definitely seems like you're trying to cover up your true feelings about it out of respect to your family and your spiritual beliefs. I'm not saying it's wrong, and I give you credit for having as much faith as you do in your life.
> 
> All I can say is try to be true to yourself. You shouldn't hide your sexuality from yourself. Once you know the answer to that then you can decide what you want to do about it. Whether follow through with your sexuality or learn to condition it so that it agrees with your lifestyle and beliefs.


 Thanks a lot, i appreciate the advice


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## PriestRevan (Jan 3, 2009)

I'm coming in.


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## LizardKing (Jan 3, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> I'm coming in.



Coming in all the guys here amirite?


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## WolfTailz (Jan 3, 2009)

grrr I am soooo confused on this issue personally. I like girls but I am very confused on guys.... one moment i do and the next i dont. lol


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## Takun (Jan 4, 2009)

roflcopter23 said:


> Although this thread is unquestionably useful, I'm still finding myself in a sort of a pickle. I'm not sure whether I'm heterosexual or bisexual, I don't know if I want to find out, and i don't know what I would do even if I did find out.
> 
> I come from a very tight family. My brother, sister and I are triplets, three of a kind. We've grown up together and have been through many great adventures. My parents have stuck through with us and helped us all out in our time of need and I cherish the relationship I've had with my family. After we moved thousands of miles away from our old country, I realized that they are all I have left. No friends, or relatives, just them. And there's also a considerable amount of "gay jokes" and what-not specially in high school. Although i'm almost done with it (thank God)... which brings me to my second point.
> 
> ...



Listen to me.  You. Are. Not. Pathetic.

Never, ever, ever say that again.  Please.  It's natural.  I've been down your road.  I beat myself up day in and day out over the feelings I had.  Nothing could make them go away.  Yes, you are Catholic...but give it time.  Things change in churchs, even the Catholic church.  Gay rights are making headway.  Do what is right in your heart.  Never let someone else tell you how you feel or how to act.  You know when something feels right and when something feels wrong.


Here's something I found out.  Family is always family.  Mine got over it and now I have a better relationship...but it took time.  You shouldn't have to lie to have family love you.


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## Wait Wait (Jan 4, 2009)

takun am i gay y/n


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## PriestRevan (Jan 4, 2009)

Being straight is so easy. God I wish.


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## Dyluck (Jan 4, 2009)

Wait Wait said:


> takun am i gay y/n



Let's find out.


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## Wait Wait (Jan 4, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> Let's find out.



:O


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## Takun (Jan 4, 2009)

Wait Wait said:


> takun am i gay y/n



I'd help you find out, but you'd have an angry weasel to remove from your throat.


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## Wait Wait (Jan 4, 2009)

woozle in my throat?  hot


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## Icarus (Jan 4, 2009)

I thought I was Bi, but then I realized that giving hugs and love, not sex, to other guys didn't count.
Oh well, at least I know now.


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## Lukar (Jan 4, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> This is the most useful thread ever made anywhere ever.



^ This.

Anyways, this thread just helped me out quite a bit. I... aha, I think I may be gay. ^^ Which is about to create a few problems that my family, and the majority of my friends won't know about, but I'm glad to know what I really am now. ^^

And I'm sorry about the whole parents issue, Takumi. I hope everything gets settled out for you. ^^

EDIT: Just read Takun's last post. xD Ignore that last bit.


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## Jonnaius (Jan 4, 2009)

Am I the only person here that hates being bi or gay? Its a hellhole when you live in a seriously homophobic city. I have never knowlingly met another gay, and I'm 15! 15 years of isolation. I actually piss myself of for thinking 'Wow, he is SO hot'. It's aggrivating!

And yes, I am a bit of a drama queen at the moment, I'm panicking about GCSE exams in 2 days. The stress levels are actually ludicrous.


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## MayDay (Jan 4, 2009)

wow...that's a lot of sexually confused kids I see out there.
Personally, why should you care if you're gay or straight? 

the way i see it, if you're gay, the only people you should ever to confide to are best friends and parents. Seeing the way society is now, many people still can't accept gays, so wearing your sexuality like a badge may not be the best idea.
I was reading one of the earlier posts on how rose got beaten by another girl for being gay and how her parents lectured her on that. That's wrong.

If you can't accept a person's believes, least you can do is to tolerate them.


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## brrrr (Jan 4, 2009)

I don't hate it, but I don't entirely welcome it with open arms. I know that if I were straight, it would had been much easier to develop normal relationships during high school and be open with myself around others. Instead, I felt I had to hide it and conform to society's "normal" routines. I could never really be myself around friends/acquaintences due to always keeping myself in check and make sure I didn't do anything or say anything that could make them uncomfortable around me. 

Don't hate it, it's just a small part of me, and I've made it a priority not to let my sexuality define myself. I sum it up to me not taking the correct actions with it when I was younger, and was too scared to come out of the closet with it. Dumb mistake, mistakes happen all of the time. Not gonna destroy my life or anything.


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## KiloCharlie (Jan 4, 2009)

i swear... i thought i was full-on straight for the LONGEST time... now i realize that i'm Bi... and i'm cool with it and so are my friends...


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## Jonnaius (Jan 4, 2009)

MayDay said:


> Personally, why should you care if you're gay or straight?



Because I've grown up in such a homophobic environment, and I'm literally petrified at the consequences of my parents finding out. My mam thinks its a fashion statement and that there are actually very few real gays, and my dad comes from a small town in a place called cumbria. I heard him telling a story about how he was in a pub when two gays walked in. They left soon afterwards - on stretchers. The policemen outside came in to stop the fight - and then joined in. So, I'm kinda worried that I'm living with a metaphorical time bomb.



MayDay said:


> the way i see it, if you're gay, the only people you should ever to confide to are best friends and parents



As I've said, parents are a bad idea. But friends? I told one, one who I trusted completely and then - he told all my friends. I've spent the last year denying it every single day, and dreading my actions. So, yeah, I hope now you can kinda understand why I hate myself for forcing myself to have to go down this road. I just wish I had been given a choice!


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## Rikio~Relentless (Jan 4, 2009)

Ever have that problem when you think your ready to come out as a gay but you think everyone already knows? XD soo fun...
The only problem is my parnters parents (church ministers and strict christians) are starting to get a liiiiiittle edgy... hmm... therein lies my problem...
*ponders*


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## brrrr (Jan 4, 2009)

Rikio~Relentless said:


> Ever have that problem when you think your ready to come out as a gay but you think everyone already knows? XD


I'd be really surprised if my family  (immediate and otherwise) didn't at least suspect it, as it's been almost 5 years since they were knowingly aware that I was in a relationship. Plus my sister found out several years ago, in which she promised to keep it a secret but she has a very big mouth. 

I've wanted to come out to my mom lately, but at the same time I don't really see how it's worth it at this point in my life, and I kind of half expect her to just be like "It took you that long to tell me?" and then I'd die.


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## Jonnaius (Jan 4, 2009)

brrrr said:


> I'd be really surprised if my family  (immediate and otherwise) didn't at least suspect it, as it's been almost 5 years since they were knowingly aware that I was in a relationship. Plus my sister found out several years ago, in which she promised to keep it a secret but she has a very big mouth.
> 
> I've wanted to come out to my mom lately, but at the same time I don't really see how it's worth it at this point in my life, and I kind of half expect her to just be like "It took you that long to tell me?" and then I'd die.



Well, I would tell them in your case. At least the worst that could happen was embarrassment. If they havent confronted you yet, it seems like they might be ok with it.

But I would listen to your heart - tell them if you want to.


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## roflcopter23 (Jan 4, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Listen to me.  You. Are. Not. Pathetic.
> 
> Never, ever, ever say that again.  Please.  It's natural.  I've been down your road.  I beat myself up day in and day out over the feelings I had.  Nothing could make them go away.  Yes, you are Catholic...but give it time.  Things change in churchs, even the Catholic church.  Gay rights are making headway.  Do what is right in your heart.  Never let someone else tell you how you feel or how to act.  You know when something feels right and when something feels wrong.
> 
> ...



You are very wise >.> Hopefully someday i'll find the courage and the means to confront myself. And after that perhaps my loved ones as well.

Thank you.


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## Fox Glove (Jan 4, 2009)

MayDay said:


> I was reading one of the earlier posts on how rose got beaten by another girl for being gay and how her parents lectured her on that. That's wrong.


Well. Bisexual, really. I never really wore gay as a badge, it's just one girl came out to a bunch of people and no one cared and so I tried coming out to her since she was a good friend and I wanted to know what sort of magic spell she was working to make people just not give a shit. Unfortunately a girl that doesn't like me at all overheard me and told everyone. The girls that had acted extremely homophobic didn't hear about how the other girl was bisexual, though thinking back on it it would've been hilarious if they did know because jesus, one bisexual girl was making some of them CRY.

I went to school with that retard that beat on me since middle school, and she would often torment me and the boyfriend at the time, because for some insane reason I can't figure out HE DATED HER ONCE. Possibly out of sheer pity. Anyway, come high school she figured out that since the boyfriend was now an ex-boyfriend and I never really cared or gave her attention for going, "HE'S CHEATING ON YOU WITH MEEEE HE LOVES MY ASSSSS!!!" she decided to change tactics to include physical harm. Like I said, I tried to whoop her ass once, but as I finally snapped and I was chasing HER around she cried to a teacher who came to the rescue because she was a special ed kid. I was threatened with expulsion and of course she didn't believe me when I said that she had been hitting me for weeks.

Well despite the fact no one usually gives a shit there's many rumors about me. I'm a dyke, a transgendered man, I really have a penis, I'm actually a big fat bear, etc. I can't date anyone from school anymore, because people start hurting them, emotionally and in some cases, physically. I don't want anyone hurt for my sake. Luckily, they haven't discovered who my closest friends are.


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## MayDay (Jan 5, 2009)

RoseTheSexKitten said:


> Well. Bisexual, really. I never really wore gay as a badge, it's just one girl came out to a bunch of people and no one cared and so I tried coming out to her since she was a good friend and I wanted to know what sort of magic spell she was working to make people just not give a shit. Unfortunately a girl that doesn't like me at all overheard me and told everyone. The girls that had acted extremely homophobic didn't hear about how the other girl was bisexual, though thinking back on it it would've been hilarious if they did know because jesus, one bisexual girl was making some of them CRY.
> 
> I went to school with that retard that beat on me since middle school, and she would often torment me and the boyfriend at the time, because for some insane reason I can't figure out HE DATED HER ONCE. Possibly out of sheer pity. Anyway, come high school she figured out that since the boyfriend was now an ex-boyfriend and I never really cared or gave her attention for going, "HE'S CHEATING ON YOU WITH MEEEE HE LOVES MY ASSSSS!!!" she decided to change tactics to include physical harm. Like I said, I tried to whoop her ass once, but as I finally snapped and I was chasing HER around she cried to a teacher who came to the rescue because she was a special ed kid. I was threatened with expulsion and of course she didn't believe me when I said that she had been hitting me for weeks.
> 
> Well despite the fact no one usually gives a shit there's many rumors about me. I'm a dyke, a transgendered man, I really have a penis, I'm actually a big fat bear, etc. I can't date anyone from school anymore, because people start hurting them, emotionally and in some cases, physically. I don't want anyone hurt for my sake. Luckily, they haven't discovered who my closest friends are.


 
Personally, it takes guts to be gay...especially seeing how the rest of the world treats them. and as a final note, I'd like to add it's been brave of you to stand up against her and the hommophobics in your school. DON'T LET EM GET TO YOU!



Jonnaius said:


> As I've said, parents are a bad idea. wish I had been given a choice!


 
No shit. once I asked my parents and a friend of mine their personal views on gays. My parents said they'd be real disappointed if me or any of my sisters became one and my friend thought they were abnormal. 
It's gonna take some time before society gets more liberal...


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## brrrr (Jan 5, 2009)

Jonnaius said:


> Well, I would tell them in your case. At least the worst that could happen was embarrassment. If they havent confronted you yet, it seems like they might be ok with it.
> 
> But I would listen to your heart - tell them if you want to.


I know my mom would be accepting of it, but I do have a dad that more or less hates gays. It's very hard for him to tolerate homosexuals, as found from a close gay friend that my sister had. He was nice to him, but when he wasn't around, he'd end up saying a lot of crude things about him to my sister, as well as my mom and I. I just don't want to become the object of attention that gets ridiculed behind his (my) back. 

I could tell my mom but if she knows then my whole family knows. She has trouble keeping things a secret.

Anyways it's not really a big deal right now in my life. I'm currently keeping a lot of secrets from my folks, I don't really consider this one anymore special or defining as the others. There'll come a time where I'll have to let them know, but I'd like to be prepared for the worst when it does come.


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## FoxxLegend (Jan 18, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> Guess what
> 
> lots of them do



Yeah, there was a kid who went to a gay bar and got picked up by 2 straight guys pretending to be gay and they took him out in the middle of no-where and killed the poor kid. They tied him to a wodden fence in an area with minimal light and beat him with the pistol butt of a .45 Magnum. They then left him to die so they didn't finish him off and end his suffering, they basically let him die slowly from his wounds. He was found the next day, cold as ice. I felt really bad for his parents when they found out...


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## Loken (Jan 19, 2009)

This is a great read.  I am straight but to my knowledge I haven't really been attracted to anyone as of yet  so who the hell knows how that will turn out.  It is a bitch not knowing, any advice?


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## Moka (Jan 19, 2009)

Loken said:


> I am straight but to my knowledge I haven't really been attracted to anyone as of yet  so who the hell knows how that will turn out.  It is a bitch not knowing, any advice?



Loken, if you ever figure this out, let me know. Seriously. I'm in the exact same boat.

It's sorta interesting. When you're 23 and have never been in any kind of relationship, people start to make assumptions. Just about every member of my family (including my gay uncle), and some of my friends, have asked me at one time or another if I were gay.

*sigh*


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## Loken (Jan 19, 2009)

Moka said:


> Loken, if you ever figure this out, let me know. Seriously. I'm in the exact same boat.
> 
> It's sorta interesting. When you're 23 and have never been in any kind of relationship, people start to make assumptions. Just about every member of my family (including my gay uncle), and some of my friends, have asked me at one time or another if I were gay.
> 
> *sigh*


*sigh* Indeed, at least its nice to know I am not the only one with this problem lol.


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## Crossfire21 (Jan 19, 2009)

I read this and it made me think about who am I? I could be bi, or not. I love women I know that's no lie. But I sometimes have differnt feelings as well. but this made me think. The society I live in makes it look like gays and bi's are filth. Then I thought "since when am I gonna let someone or some media tell me what my values are?". Before I was just scared to even come out say I was furry in my mind because society says that furries are just freaks and have some form of sick obsession. I did not want to be a "freak" then I got depressed. I knew what I was, I have an undescribal feeling to be an anthro and I hated being a pathetic human and alone (this was before I found out about the furry community ). But then after finding the furry community I realized that societies view on things does not make them true. So bringing me to my point since when was being gay or bi any different? If I am bi then fine,if I am just bicurious then thats fine too. Just because the media and others say that being gay is wrong and that if you are gay or bi that you are completly messed up, that is bull. I used to be poisoned by these messages of hate untill I met someone who was gay, he was'nt a freak he was himself and he seemed to not really give a flying f**k about that he lived in a town of gaybashers. It inspired me to just do the same.

-This thread is probally the most usefull thread that actually means something. Plus you story is some what like mine and I understand were you come from.


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## seekerwolf (Jan 20, 2009)

Hey, for all you people with support thank your lucky stars, some of us are outcast when we are born how we make it out is anyone's guess God's bless.


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## Loken (Jan 20, 2009)

Moka, as much as I hate to say this I think we just need to wait and find the right person and let that be the deciding factor.  Though knowing before hand would narrow some choices and make it easier I guess its just sort of a you will know, like being the one lol.


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## Ren-Raku (Jan 20, 2009)

Loken, I think it's not really a case of finding the right person to know your sexuality, try looking at everyone's physical appearance and their mental manner in the frame of mind whether you would consider them to be your partner int he future, and how you'd feel about that. HTH.


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## TheAffliction (Jan 21, 2009)

Thanks for this thread... It will help out a lot when I finally decide to come out... Thanks.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 21, 2009)

FoxxLegend said:


> Yeah, there was a kid who went to a gay bar and got picked up by 2 straight guys pretending to be gay and they took him out in the middle of no-where and killed the poor kid. They tied him to a wodden fence in an area with minimal light and beat him with the pistol butt of a .45 Magnum. They then left him to die so they didn't finish him off and end his suffering, they basically let him die slowly from his wounds. He was found the next day, cold as ice. I felt really bad for his parents when they found out...


 
Damn, that's bogus as hell....I came out to my family, and yeah, I'm pretty much hated and they try to make me "repent for my sins", and I've been jumped before, but nothing that serious....That just makes me wonder, are we getting more barbaric as time goes by? Seriously, all we do these days is hate on people for their preferences, and it leads to people dieing. Is it really necessary? Anyway, before I go on a rant, anybody got any advice for dealing with a family of super religous assholes?


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## FoxxLegend (Jan 21, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Damn, that's bogus as hell....I came out to my family, and yeah, I'm pretty much hated and they try to make me "repent for my sins", and I've been jumped before, but nothing that serious....That just makes me wonder, are we getting more barbaric as time goes by? Seriously, all we do these days is hate on people for their preferences, and it leads to people dieing. Is it really necessary? Anyway, before I go on a rant, anybody got any advice for dealing with a family of super religous assholes?



I agree with you 100% my friend but what us Gays and Bi's think does'nt matter to those who think that we should come to an end like that poor boy. If we voice our opinion, a single voice won't go far. That's why there are Gay rights movements and some such going on. And I most definitely support that cause!


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## Kurama17 (Jan 21, 2009)

FoxxLegend said:


> I agree with you 100% my friend but what us Gays and Bi's think does'nt matter to those who think that we should come to an end like that poor boy. If we voice our opinion, a single voice won't go far. That's why there are Gay rights movements and some such going on. And I most definitely support that cause!


 
Well, when you're put in the hospital after a brutal beating by your own "family members" you'd be wondering about a lot of stuff =/


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## Marsridge (Jan 22, 2009)

Matthew Shepard's case is one of the worst I have ever heard of. I cried when I watched the documentary "Laramie" as a teenager. We also saw a live play of it on a high school field trip. Some asshole laughed during the middle of it. I don't know who he was trying to impress. 

More recently, a lesbian woman was approached by four men who saw a bumper sticker on her car. She was gang-raped right there in the parking lot, then brought into the woods, raped again, and let go. I read a lot of gay blogs and hear every so often about hate crimes. Even though it is 2009, there is still much improvement to be made in relation to acceptance and equal rights.

My own experience with figuring out who I am and what suits me has been a long one, and I don't think it will ever be over completely. I am always learning something new about myself. I have been attracted to other girls and women since I was in middle school, but it took me until this month to clear the doubts I had.

I remember telling my mother that I thought I was a lesbian when I was 14 years old. She told me that I was perfectly normal, and that it is no bad thing, and that she loves me no matter who makes me happy. A parent's judgement on their child plays a big part in how that person will cope with what they are feeling. I am glad my mother was so accepting.

It's funny sometimes though, she'll always tell me about her friend at work, or whoever, and say "my gay friend Jeff" or "Alice, she's a lesbian". She also tells me what actresses and famous women are lesbians when we see them on TV. She told me she doesn't want grandchildren either.  I'm lucky to have my mom.

I wish any of you struggling out there to identify yourselves the best of luck, and remember that it's not always necessary to have a label or a sure name for your situation. But sometimes you want that label, and that's okay too! Do what makes you happiest.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

That is a sad story, but people will never change. Hate because of sexuality, race, religion, and all those other things will never go away, and there's nothing we can do about it.


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## Uro (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Well, when you're put in the hospital after a brutal beating by your own "family members" you'd be wondering about a lot of stuff =/



Wat.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

Yes, Uro, I have been assaulted by my own "family members". Cousins, to be exact. I've had a hard life because of my sexuality, but I'm not giving up on it.


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## TheAffliction (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Yes, Uro, I have been assaulted by my own "family members". Cousins, to be exact. I've had a hard life because of my sexuality, but I'm not giving up on it.



That's seriously fucked up. Why can't people just be accepting of it? I really can't see any reason for someone to be upset about gays except to get attention from friends.

I think I'm gonna tell one of my female friends first, because I don't want to get into an awkward situation with one of my male friends right away. I don't know how they would react. It's not like I've been checking them out or anything though.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

My advice is, only tell people you know you can trust, otherwise it turns out horrible....I still end up crying myself to sleep sometimes, and it hurts to know my own "family" won't accept me because of my sexuality, that's why I say fuck 'em.


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## TheAffliction (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> My advice is, only tell people you know you can trust, otherwise it turns out horrible....I still end up crying myself to sleep sometimes, and it hurts to know my own "family" won't accept me because of my sexuality, that's why I say fuck 'em.



I know my family will accept it. They always tell me that it's alright to be gay, etc...

But it makes me wonder... How old were you when you came out to your parents?

And the girl I plan on telling is a really good friend. I know she's someone I can trust.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

I was 14, but my dad was drunk when I told him, so he forgot it. My mom, who lived in Cali at the time, and still lives in Cali, is ok with it, but mostly all of that shit happened because of her piece of shit husband, who is nothing to me. I call him whatever I want, and I get away with it, because I've ended up beating him down before, and I'll do it again. But that's beside the point. Word got to him from my sister, and it got to my mom's side, and I'm instantly hated. My dad forgot, so I'm not telling him, but my mom is the only one who still accepts me, and it hurts me to see her in so much distress because of her husband's family. Btw, she re-married, and had my two little brothers, who are still too young to know what's going on.


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## TheAffliction (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I was 14, but my dad was drunk when I told him, so he forgot it. My mom, who lived in Cali at the time, and still lives in Cali, is ok with it, but mostly all of that shit happened because of her piece of shit husband, who is nothing to me. I call him whatever I want, and I get away with it, because I've ended up beating him down before, and I'll do it again. But that's beside the point. Word got to him from my sister, and it got to my mom's side, and I'm instantly hated. My dad forgot, so I'm not telling him, but my mom is the only one who still accepts me, and it hurts me to see her in so much distress because of her husband's family. Btw, she re-married, and had my two little brothers, who are still too young to know what's going on.



Wow, reminds how fucked up life is. I can't believe how people say that they are tolerant people, yet get all afraid of someone who likes the same gender. It makes NO SENSE. 
I also don't like how so many Christians out there say that God loves everyone... but, you know, not those fags. They don't deserve it or something.


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## Nocturne (Jan 22, 2009)

TheAffliction said:


> I think I'm gonna tell one of my female friends first, because I don't want to get into an awkward situation with one of my male friends right away. I don't know how they would react. It's not like I've been checking them out or anything though.



I can't speak for the gender of the friends you tell, the first person I told was of the opposite sex.  In any case, I'm Bi so I guess it wouldn't really matter.  It did really help to start with a close friend first though.  I'm really self-conscious, so I was really apprehensive about telling people, even if I thought they would be accepting.  It wasn't a big deal to any of them, so I guess have faith in your friends, but go at your own pace.

I'm still in the process of coming out, really.  I just told my mom this weekend, which was a huge worry for me.  It turned out alright.  It's odd that I thought I would just end up not telling alot of people, but I find myself at least wanting to confide in my close friends.  This next weekend I'm planning on coming out to a friend that I used to make alot of gay jokes with (haha...).  So I'm a little worried about that.  I get more comfortable with telling people, and even with myself, every time though.


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## Dyluck (Jan 22, 2009)

Nocturne said:


> I can't speak for the gender of the friends you tell, the first person I told was of the opposite sex.  In any case, I'm Bi so I guess it wouldn't really matter.  It did really help to start with a close friend first though.  I'm really self-conscious, so I was really apprehensive about telling people, even if I thought they would be accepting.  It wasn't a big deal to any of them, so I guess have faith in your friends, but go at your own pace.
> 
> I'm still in the process of coming out, really.  I just told my mom this weekend, which was a huge worry for me.  It turned out alright.  It's odd that I thought I would just end up not telling alot of people, but I find myself at least wanting to confide in my close friends.  This next weekend I'm planning on coming out to a friend that I used to make alot of gay jokes with (haha...).  So I'm a little worried about that.  I get more comfortable with telling people, and even with myself, every time though.



Yeah but like

You're a woman

And bisexual

People celebrate when they hear that.


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## Nocturne (Jan 22, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> Yeah but like
> 
> You're a woman
> 
> ...



Lol, not everyone unfortunately XD.  I wrestled with the idea when I was alot younger, and I guess I repressed it to the point where it made me self conscious about it.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

Basically, it kills me to know that straights LOVE Bisexual females or Lesbians, but they hate gay men. They would never get a chance with a lesbian, so why try?


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## Dyluck (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Basically, it kills me to know that straights LOVE Bisexual females or Lesbians, but they hate gay men. They would never get a chance with a lesbian, so why try?



The male's way of thinking seems to be that any sexual interaction that doesn't involve an erect penis is just fooling around.  Those lesbian lovers having sex over there are just warming up for Mr. Man to come along with his erect penis to really get things going, which is probably why men seem to get so put off when you bring not one but _two_ other erect penises into the mix.


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## TheAffliction (Jan 22, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> The male's way of thinking seems to be that any sexual interaction that doesn't involve an erect penis is just fooling around.  Those lesbian lovers having sex over there are just warming up for Mr. Man to come along with his erect penis to really get things going, which is probably why men seem to get so put off when you bring not one but _two_ other erect penises into the mix.



Yeah, you're probably right...

On another topic, I'm just as "normal" or "manly" as the next guy (for the most part), and I like the same things that guys like usually... Just when it comes to who I love, they get scared if that person is the same sex as me... 

Are they afraid that my "gay-ness" is going to rub off on them? Do they think I'm going to try to hit on them? I just don't get it.


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## Dyluck (Jan 22, 2009)

TheAffliction said:


> Yeah, you're probably right...
> 
> On another topic, I'm just as "normal" or "manly" as the next guy (for the most part), and I like the same things that guys like usually... Just when it comes to who I love, they get scared if that person is the same sex as me...
> 
> Are they afraid that my "gay-ness" is going to rub off on them? Do they think I'm going to try to hit on them? I just don't get it.



Many homophobic individuals likely had a homosexual experience earlier in their lives (i.e. boys often do all sorts of crazy things in all male schools or in scouts etc).  These persons worry that as a result of those experiences that they may become homosexual, or that a seed of homosexuality has been planted in them.  They seem to think that a homosexual man will come along with his little watering can of gay and water that seed of homosexuality, turning them into homosexuals as well.  As a result, the individual becomes homophobic, and often reacts violently towards homosexuals out of fear of somehow becoming one as well.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

I still don't see why people are afraid of it. And another thing that gets me is, if you're straight and homophobic, why would you rape a gay guy? I'm speaking from experience here, as I was raped by a perfectly straight guy, but obviously he thought it'd be a great idea, and it wasn't technically rape because I like men. WRONG. Even if I am homosexual, that doesn't mean I like being used as some toy for a release in a dark alleyway. So, this makes me wonder: If you're straight and hate gays, why would you have sex with one in an alleyway against their will?


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## Dyluck (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I still don't see why people are afraid of it. And another thing that gets me is, if you're straight and homophobic, why would you rape a gay guy? I'm speaking from experience here, as I was raped by a perfectly straight guy, but obviously he thought it'd be a great idea, and it wasn't technically rape because I like men. WRONG. Even if I am homosexual, that doesn't mean I like being used as some toy for a release in a dark alleyway. So, this makes me wonder: If you're straight and hate gays, why would you fuck one in an alleyway against their will?



Rape is a crime of hate, not lust.  You say that you don't like being used as a toy, well, there you go.  I doubt that he thought that it wasn't actually rape (unless he was a sociopath or something) because he was doing it purposefully to hurt you (emotionally, physically, etc).
Also, that guy may just be a homosexual in heavy denial.
Sorry to hear about that, in any case.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

Yeah, I got a pretty fucked up life, but I'm dealing with it. Still, it's kinda funny when they say they'll never do anything sexual with a man, yet they turn around and rape a homosexual man out of hate. It has to be heavy denial.


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## Dyluck (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Yeah, I got a pretty fucked up life, but I'm dealing with it. Still, it's kinda funny when they say they'll never do anything sexual with a man, yet they turn around and rape a homosexual man out of hate. It has to be heavy denial.



Studies have shown.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

Well, all I know is most humans are a bunch of barbaric assholes who can't accept something different from themselves, so they try to kill it, or "cure" it. HOMOSEXUALITY IS NOT A DISEASE. I'm gonna stop before I start ranting.


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## Dyluck (Jan 22, 2009)

True that.  Let me buy you a drink, my friend.


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## FoxyMcCloud (Jan 22, 2009)

This is an incredible article, and your story is interesting as well.  Good to hear things are going a bit better for you and Eosopp... oy, don't hate me, I tried writing his name from memory XD

My own story isn't filled with that amount of drama.  I grew up, acted a little feminine and preferred my mother's company far more than my father's.  While in Junior High and High School I caught myself staring at guys (especially in the gym locker room...).  Heck, I even had crushes on guys based on their bodies, but I hated myself cuz they were such idiots lol.  Regardless, I did try having a girlfriend during high school, but it didn't work out at all (and, hey, today she's bi and I'm now gay.  Actually, we didn't speak for a long time, but just recently we began getting back in touch with each other and rebuilding burnt bridges).

I went to college, and I was pretty much forced out of the closet.  I met a group of friends, and a guy in the group took a liking to me.  He would sit next to me, put his hand on my thigh, lean into me... he even kissed me on the cheek in plain view of everyone.  I didn't know what to do, but I wasn't pushing him away, either.  One night I let myself go, and decided to 'try the gay thing' to see if that was really what I was.  So, we dated for a while, and I realized that I liked being gay.  I was happy with myself, because I wasn't hiding it anymore.

Over time I realized... I got no backlash.  No one was chasing me with pitchforks.  No one was calling me names.  No one tried to pick fights with me (oh, they'd have been toast anyway).  Nothing.  People were just... fine with it.  I was accepted.  It leaves me with a twidge of guilt, because I know so many gays and lesbians (and bisexuals) get hell for being true to themselves.  I wish I could make that go away, but this is a society that fears "different," but it's slowly coming to accept gay as an everyday thing.  I think the positive depictions of gay culture on the television over the past decade has really jump-started that.  It's taking a long time, but I've no doubt in my mind that by the time another decade or two has passed by it will be considered normal to be either/or.  Who knows?  We may even see our first serious American gay presidential candidate in the coming decade or two.

These days I'm no longer with the boy who forced me out of the closet, and I won't go into the here nor there of the timeframe, but I'm proud to be gay.  I'm glad he saw me for who I was, and gave me the gentle push (okay, full on shove) out of the closet.  I'm not about to strut myself around a pride parade, or take a soapbox, or anything, because it's just a facet of myself.  I lead a normal life; I just have a partner to share it with, and I'm happy like that.  That's about it 

Be comfortable with yourself, be true to yourself, and be proud of who you are.  Everything else will fall into place, so long as you take it one step at a time.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

Truly beautiful Foxy, seriously. I wish I could have had it as easy as you, and I am a little jealous.  But I know that there are good people like you out there, and I hope someday we can all be as good as you.

And David, I would love a drink, or hit me up on AIM for a chat.


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## TheAffliction (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Truly beautiful Foxy, seriously. I wish I could have had it as easy as you, and I am a little jealous.  But I know that there are good people like you out there, and I hope someday we can all be as good as you.
> 
> And David, I would love a drink, or hit me up on AIM for a chat.



That's unfair to yourself... Don't call yourself a bad person because he had an easier time 

I still haven't come out, and I am nervous about it, but I know it will be for the best because then I will be completely free from having to hide it all the time. Hell, I have P.E. first period, and the amount of nude guys walking around the room almost makes me blush, but I know that would really put me in an awkward spot. 99% of the guys at my school are dicks, so I hate them anyway... Everyone is worried about impressing everyone else. I'm gay and I think that I am more secure than they are. xD


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

I was saying Foxy is a good person because he has a kind heart, and I'm wishing we all could.


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## TheAffliction (Jan 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I was saying Foxy is a good person because he has a kind heart, and I'm wishing we all could.



Oh, ok. I thought you meant that because you had/(have?) a hard time, you're a bad person or something. I've heard it before... It's sometimes a product of being told that you're a bad person all the time, you start believing it.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 22, 2009)

I know I'm a good person, I'm just going through some fucked up times....Crying yourself to sleep is not fun....


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## FoxxLegend (Jan 23, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Well, when you're put in the hospital after a brutal beating by your own "family members" you'd be wondering about a lot of stuff =/



What do you mean? When did I say that?


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## Kurama17 (Jan 23, 2009)

FoxxLegend said:


> What do you mean? When did I say that?


 
Not you, FoxyMcCloud.


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## FoxxLegend (Jan 24, 2009)

Ah, and nice name you gave me! I love StarFox!


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## bozzles (Jan 24, 2009)

My three closest friends know that I'm gay (and I'm sure some more people know because my friends aren't the best secret keepers).

They're cool with it.


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## FoxxLegend (Jan 24, 2009)

Hmm, doesn't sound like it was a good idea to me. You never know who the news might spread to then. You may not mind until people start getting on your case about it and start calling you "Faggot". Trust me, I know what it's like...Sucks.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 25, 2009)

FoxxLegend said:


> Ah, and nice name you gave me! I love StarFox!


  *Facepalms* No, the user, FoxyMcCloud...The blue kitsune....


And trust me, people calling you faggot isn't as bad as getting beat down, even though I would prefer being called something than getting my ass kicked.


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## Takun (Jan 27, 2009)

Posting in a thread I made....


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## Kurama17 (Jan 27, 2009)

We really need to sticky this, it's a great thread.


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## LizardKing (Jan 31, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> We really need to sticky this, it's a great thread.



wait what


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## KawaiiHusky (Jan 31, 2009)

Hi Everyone I know that i don't have 20 postings but I really wanted to write in this one ^_^.


My Best friend knows I am gay and he is ok with it. Hi is so ok with it that went I go to his house to stay the night we sleep in the same room. One time I told hem that I wanted to be his BF and we did not talk for like a moth, but then he out of the blue he talks to me again then tells me if I wanted to stay at his house for the weekend and that made me so happy ^_^. that time we talk about why I like hem and other stuff. It was so much fun went he talk to me again. We became closer friends and know we jock about it ^_^. 

Went I told my Brother and Sisters, My Brothers was ok with it and both of my sisters were ok with it 2. ..lol one of them was like Yay i knew you were and she hug me ^_^ she was actually happy that I came out.

I have not told my mom and dad but I think that my moms knows and she is opk with it ^_^. All my other friends know and because I actually came out. i have become more popular lol.


I have Girlfriend and that is really strange because she knows i am gay and don't like girls but she was like "I don't care if you are gay I still love you" ^_^ lol.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 31, 2009)

Good story, and it actually sounds like it worked out. I guess I'll hop on the story bandwagon too 

My story:

I was 14/15 at the time, trying to hide it, like usual. It was just a normal day at school, and then I went home with a friend (who happened to be my first male mate, go figure). Well, I slowly started to come out to everybody at school, and since my school was and is still full of ghetto bastards, I'm still hated. *Sigh* Well, somehow, my parents got ahold of it, and then everything all went to hell. Every family meeting, they're always trying to "purify me" and make me "repent", but it gets worse. One day, on my 16th birthday, about 3-4 of my cousins tricked me into going somewhere secluded with them. Next thing you know, I get hit in the back of the head, and as soon as I hit the ground, they all start kicking the shit out of me, until I couldn't even move. They beat me down so bad, I was in the hospital for at least a week, all because I was and still am the only gay person in the family, and they're a bunch of religious assholes. So, now I get to deal with the constant religious torture every time I see my "family". My grandparents stopped talking to me, cousins were in jail so they hate me, the only one who I know still loves me is my mom, but she's too far away for me to do anything. As you can probably guess, I wish my coming out was as easy as some of the other people's on here experiences. Getting beat down is not fun =/


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## mrredfox (Jan 31, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Good story, and it actually sounds like it worked out. I guess I'll hop on the story bandwagon too
> 
> My story:
> 
> I was 14/15 at the time, trying to hide it, like usual. It was just a normal day at school, and then I went home with a friend (who happened to be my first male mate, go figure). Well, I slowly started to come out to everybody at school, and since my school was and is still full of ghetto bastards, I'm still hated. *Sigh* Well, somehow, my parents got ahold of it, and then everything all went to hell. Every family meeting, they're always trying to "purify me" and make me "repent", but it gets worse. One day, on my 16th birthday, about 3-4 of my cousins tricked me into going somewhere secluded with them. Next thing you know, I get hit in the back of the head, and as soon as I hit the ground, they all start kicking the shit out of me, until I couldn't even move. They beat me down so bad, I was in the hospital for at least a week, all because I was and still am the only gay person in the family, and they're a bunch of religious assholes. So, now I get to deal with the constant religious torture every time I see my "family". My grandparents stopped talking to me, cousins were in jail so they hate me, the only one who I know still loves me is my mom, but she's too far away for me to do anything. As you can probably guess, I wish my coming out was as easy as some of the other people's on here experiences. Getting beat down is not fun =/



Owch dude... I really can't see how people can be so intollerant of other peoples buisness... Especially your own flesh and blood. I feel bad for you :/


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## Kurama17 (Jan 31, 2009)

Yeah, because of that and some shit I'd only tell people on AIM if I think I can confide in them, I have various random mental breakdowns and I usually cry myself to sleep sometimes ;~;


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## KawaiiHusky (Jan 31, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Good story, and it actually sounds like it worked out. I guess I'll hop on the story bandwagon too
> 
> My story:
> 
> I was 14/15 at the time, trying to hide it, like usual. It was just a normal day at school, and then I went home with a friend (who happened to be my first male mate, go figure). Well, I slowly started to come out to everybody at school, and since my school was and is still full of ghetto bastards, I'm still hated. *Sigh* Well, somehow, my parents got ahold of it, and then everything all went to hell. Every family meeting, they're always trying to "purify me" and make me "repent", but it gets worse. One day, on my 16th birthday, about 3-4 of my cousins tricked me into going somewhere secluded with them. Next thing you know, I get hit in the back of the head, and as soon as I hit the ground, they all start kicking the shit out of me, until I couldn't even move. They beat me down so bad, I was in the hospital for at least a week, all because I was and still am the only gay person in the family, and they're a bunch of religious assholes. So, now I get to deal with the constant religious torture every time I see my "family". My grandparents stopped talking to me, cousins were in jail so they hate me, the only one who I know still loves me is my mom, but she's too far away for me to do anything. As you can probably guess, I wish my coming out was as easy as some of the other people's on here experiences. Getting beat down is not fun =/




Some of the people in my school wait Most of the people at my school hate gays but they don't have the balls to fuck with me because They know that I would win. i am a really calm person but if someone does something to me or one of my friends I turn in to a really scary person. 

Last time someone did something to me I broke 3 of there fingers and they got a pen to there hand. I am a really nice person but if a person is going to be an ass i would do what ever it takes to not make them fuck with me.

My Family is mostly religious and in family meetings which we have one like each year I just tell then "is not your Life so what do you care".


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## Kurama17 (Jan 31, 2009)

That's what I've been trying to tell them all along.


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## bozzles (Jan 31, 2009)

Oh, hey, I didn't notice that this got stickied.


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## Kurama17 (Jan 31, 2009)

*Facepalm*


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## Uro (Jan 31, 2009)

I find it kind of funny that nearly everyone has some sort of statement such as "I'm gay but no one messes with me because I can beet them up."

Which I very much doubt is the truth in most cases. The majority of people here can't best a grapefruit.


----------



## Takun (Jan 31, 2009)

Uro said:


> I find it kind of funny that nearly everyone has some sort of statement such as "I'm gay but no one messes with me because I can beet them up."
> 
> Which I very much doubt is the truth in most cases. The majority of people here can't best a grapefruit.



I can be an exception?


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## AlexInsane (Jan 31, 2009)

Gay people can't beat up anyone. 

I mean, really. When was the last time you saw a pair of queens get in a fight with each other? Jerry Springer QUITE aside.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 1, 2009)

Well, I still need to cope with this, but what the hell....All I know is this'll cause another breakdown, so bare with me people. And I forgot if I told anyone this already, but eh, might as well.

My story part two:

It was a Friday night, about 1 1/2 years ago. Me and some friends went to a school dance, and it was just my luck I had to walk home, and no, I'm not getting detailed, because I'm not getting banned. But, on the way home, I decided to take an alley as a shortcut, and boy do I regret that decision....I was approached from behind by some random stranger, and raped right in that alleyway....As soon as it was done, I still had to walk home, crying my eyes out because I felt so violated, but the messed up part was, after it was done, the guy said: "You're gay, you loved it." What got me, is how did this man know me? Come to find out, he had been stalking me without my knowing three weeks prior. I felt so horrible, and I still do to this day. The only good thing about it was that the man was put in jail, and will be in jail for a long time.


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## Cronus616 (Feb 1, 2009)

i dont think im ever going to come out O.O
ive heard some horrible things...specially from the dude who posted above me
hai kurama ^-^


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 1, 2009)

That is good to know. and on the topic about gays fighting . i think that some gay guys are way stronger and can do way more damage to someone if they wanted 2


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## micolithe (Feb 1, 2009)

I don't think anyone should come out until college. In high school it's pretty much social suicide, in college it's a brave new world and all the people you knew and hated from high school are for the most part gone forever.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 1, 2009)

micolithe said:


> I don't think anyone should come out until college. In high school it's pretty much social suicide, in college it's a brave new world and all the people you knew and hated from high school are for the most part gone forever.





I think is it better to come out went you are younger and not older


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## micolithe (Feb 1, 2009)

I figure coming out at a time where you're meeting a bunch of new people and leaving a bunch of people behind would be easier is all.


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## Cronus616 (Feb 1, 2009)

yeah i would agree with micolithe.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 1, 2009)

well yes but if you come out in a younger age people are going to meat you as you are and not have to find out later


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## Kurama17 (Feb 1, 2009)

Cronus616 said:


> i dont think im ever going to come out O.O
> ive heard some horrible things...specially from the dude who posted above me
> hai kurama ^-^


 
Cronus, it all depends on the family of the person who comes out. All my family are a bunch of pretentious religious assholes.


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## micolithe (Feb 1, 2009)

Well the thing is, with going to a whole new place, you can be upfront about it right away and avoid the whole "coming out" thing altogether with these new people. You'd have to come out to your close friends from high school and your family, yes, but for all intents and purposes as far as the people I met in the first few weeks of college were concerned, I was out of the closet already.


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## Gavrill (Feb 1, 2009)

I fell in love with my best friend in 7th grade. She ended up just saying "Yeah, sure, whatever. No one loves me."

She ended up being a bit of a slut. But drat, if I saw her again I'd probably just hold her and not let go. I'm so afraid of her falling into a state of depression and drugs again. 

That being said, I starting coming out at a completely different school. In Miami. Needless to say, it was more readily accepted there. But I never did date anyone after that...just kind of got let down every time. But now I have a wonderful mate that I wouldn't trade for the world. Happy ending, I hope.


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## silver_foxfang (Feb 1, 2009)

I cant stand all the high strung religious people out there that use someone else's sexuality as an excuse to hurt and attack them. I myself don't have a religion but that's personal. all of my friends are religious haters. of course me and all my friends are rednecks along with 90% of my school. i think gay and bi people should just wait until college to come out. i have herd its better to wait till then because people are more excepting and wont stoop to childish behavior like in middle school and Early high school. i have no problem with religion i just don't want anything holding me back from what i want and i think religion would do just that. if it helps other people to be happy and succeed its their choice. i haven't actually came out to very many people about being bi and i like it that way i might say something in a few years but as for now no way i don't know what would happen i would probably end up in trouble because i have a very short temper when it comes to people i don't know giving me a hard time


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 1, 2009)

I think that is is always better to tell your friends and if they hate it then they were not your friends at all. I am happy that everyone i know,knows that i am am all of my friends actually protect me if someone trades to do something to me .I think that people that hare religious are the worse people and they think they are better then other people.


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## silver_foxfang (Feb 1, 2009)

KawaiiHusky said:


> I think that is is always better to tell your friends and if they hate it then they were not your friends at all. I am happy that everyone i know,knows that i am am all of my friends actually protect me if someone trades to do something to me .I think that people that hare religious are the worse people and they think they are better then
> i have known all of my friends for a long time i don't make new ones often and if they stopped being friends with me i would consider it a good sized blow to my rep and self esteem i couldn't care less about my rep but if i lost my old friends i don't think could do anything i already need to drag myself to and from school they are the only reason i still go


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## Kurama17 (Feb 1, 2009)

I can't even read that last post x.x


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## silver_foxfang (Feb 1, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I can't even read that last post x.x


 
sorry i mixed it up a little


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 1, 2009)

I just Want to tell everyone that If they want to talk about anything they can AIM me ^_^. i am a really talkative person lol


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## silver_foxfang (Feb 1, 2009)

Alright i have something funny to say this just happend. My mom and sister had just got back from the wall mart. But they forgot to get bread so my mom told me to go to to get the bread and pop so i left to get the stuff. And half way to the wall mart i remembered i left my computer open on this thread. So i freaked out and sped. i don't have a drivers license when i got to the store i  got the pop then i went to the bread section. And couldn't find the right kind so i started to panic it took me 15 minutes to find the bread. when i grabbed the bread i ran to the checkout line. the guy rung up the items then dropped the 12 pack of orange soda it shot all over the place and i had to stand their wile this guy moped it up and then he went to get another case of pop. by this time i was 100% sure that my mom or my sister had got on my computer read this thread so. i grabbed the stuff and ran out into the parking lot and i couldn't find the car big parking lot  10 minutes to find the car the hole trip took me over a half hour in that time i could have walked by then literally. i got home and nothing my computer hadn't Ben touched. the hole time i was freaking out 
in my head ant thinking about what would happen 

i think its funny now. and the car isn't insured

hope my spelling and grammar isn't to bad


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## silver_foxfang (Feb 1, 2009)

i should have spellchecked that


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## Kurama17 (Feb 1, 2009)

Lemme guess, you had porn on your computer?


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 1, 2009)

that is funny


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## bozzles (Feb 1, 2009)

Uro said:


> I find it kind of funny that nearly everyone has some sort of statement such as "I'm gay but no one messes with me because I can beet them up."
> 
> Which I very much doubt is the truth in most cases. The majority of people here can't best a grapefruit.


I'm gay and I'm afraid to tell people because I'm a pussy.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 2, 2009)

bozzles said:


> I'm gay and I'm afraid to tell people because I'm a pussy.




how old are you ??? i am just asking and why are you scare ?? i was 2 but i think that is always better to come out


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## silver_foxfang (Feb 2, 2009)

i have to ask you guys something. how do you deal with day to day stress


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## Tycho (Feb 2, 2009)

silver_foxfang said:


> i have to ask you guys something. how do you deal with day to day stress



By flaming and trolling people like you on Internet forums.

At least, that's how I do it.


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## silver_foxfang (Feb 2, 2009)

Tycho The Itinerant said:


> By flaming and trolling people like you on Internet forums.
> 
> At least, that's how I do it.


 
ha i don't have a problem with people like you. I'm looking for useful info


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## QwertyQwert (Feb 2, 2009)

I'm pretty sure I'm bisexual. The only thing is that I don't feel like I want to be in a relationship with another man... But mostly because of what others would think. The community I live in is very small and word gets around quick, and unfortunately I care too much about what other people think... There are little to none known gays/bis in my community as well, and people aren't very many people I can talk to about it... My view on all this is to wait till college... And then start out by letting people know... So that way it won't be awkward later on.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 2, 2009)

silver_foxfang said:


> i have to ask you guys something. how do you deal with day to day stress




It is easy for me because every one know that I so i don't have to do much ^_^.all my Friends actually think that it is cool i am that way ... strange lol .


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## micolithe (Feb 2, 2009)

silver_foxfang said:


> i have to ask you guys something. how do you deal with day to day stress


Personally I drink and smoke cigarettes.

I'm trying to quit smoking but it isn't so easy when you have a bad day.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 2, 2009)

micolithe said:


> Personally I drink and smoke cigarettes.
> 
> I'm trying to quit smoking but it isn't so easy when you have a bad day.




why don't you do something else with you file like smoking. it works sometimes for some of my friends


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## Takun (Feb 2, 2009)

silver_foxfang said:


> i have to ask you guys something. how do you deal with day to day stress




Through the support of friends.  College makes it easier because there are groups for you that help.  Basically I just be myself and most people tend to like me >>


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## Kurama17 (Feb 2, 2009)

Meh, I'm hated everywhere, so I stopped caring.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 3, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Meh, I'm hated everywhere, so I stopped caring.




aww. I just know that you will get someone that will make you happy one day ^_^


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## Kurama17 (Feb 3, 2009)

I hope so...But hope will only get you so far...


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 3, 2009)

if you were to live here I would work something out ^_^.


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## Chanticleer (Feb 3, 2009)

I tend to think of my coming out prospects tactically.

For instance: if I come out, will my parents still help me through life's hurdles? 

Will the potential for physical danger increase? As I said to my therapist, I can take verbal abuse, but I can't take bullets.

And, most importantly, will it interfere with my dreams? I want to be the person who terraforms Mars. I want to be the person who finds a replacement for antibiotics. I want to be the person who writes fiction so beautifully that my reader's eyes bleed at the sight of my work. 

How much more difficult will those things be to achieve if the world knows that I am bi and a rather kinky sort of bi at that?


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 3, 2009)

Chanticleer said:


> I tend to think of my coming out prospects tactically.
> 
> For instance: if I come out, will my parents still help me through life's hurdles?
> 
> ...





in my opinion if you want to be all that people will recognize you more if you were to come out because you are someone gay that has done amassing things. but that is just me


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## DracoDark (Feb 3, 2009)

KawaiiHusky said:


> in my opinion if you want to be all that people will recognize you more if you were to come out because you are someone gay that has done amassing things


  i agree noone should care about your sexuality 

especcially if youre gonna do all those things


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 3, 2009)

yeah i think that is would make you more popular


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## Chanticleer (Feb 3, 2009)

KawaiiHusky said:


> in my opinion if you want to be all that people will recognize you more if you were to come out because you are someone gay that has done amassing things. but that is just me



Possibly... but one would have to admit that having an alternate sexuality might complicate those things at the moment.

By the way, just so you know that I'm not blowing hot air, look up bacteriophages some time. They are viruses that only attack specific bacterial cells and I think they are going to replace antibiotics some day (which given the rate at which antibiotic resistant bacteria are being created should be a major focus of medical research, but most labs are just content with searching for more kinds of antibiotics rather than looking for alternative forms of treatments.)

I have high hopes for the use of arctic lichen in the terraforming of Mars, though that's still on the drawing board.

And as for the stories... well, my FA page is a moderate indicator of my progress.

I just worry that people will ignore what I have to offer if I come out.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 3, 2009)

Chanticleer said:


> .
> I just worry that people will ignore what I have to offer if I come out.




if they were to do that I would be so piss.


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## Uro (Feb 4, 2009)

KawaiiHusky said:


> if they were to do that I would be so piss.



How yellow of piss would you turn into?


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 4, 2009)

Uro said:


> How yellow of piss would you turn into?




really don't know lol


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## Mauru (Feb 6, 2009)

As for myself, I am not interested in boys or girls. In fact, I am very different than most people. I want to be pure and moral and try my hard to be so, I hate romance and perversion. I have never dated or fallen in love and I will never going to do it.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 6, 2009)

Damn, I couldn't deal with being like that.


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## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

I wouldn't be able to get a date if I tryed. Thats why I ust don't try any more lol. I have better things to do like math and writing.


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## elidolente (Feb 7, 2009)

wow, this thread is amazing. I guess I am mostly straight with a hint of bi in me...


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## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

Come over to the dark side, we have coookies XP


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## Uro (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> As for myself, I am not interested in boys or girls. In fact, I am very different than most people. I want to be pure and moral and try my hard to be so, I hate romance and perversion. I have never dated or fallen in love and I will never going to do it.



Troll is a troll.


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> As for myself, I am not interested in boys or girls. In fact, I am very different than most people. I want to be pure and moral and try my hard to be so, I hate romance and perversion. I have never dated or fallen in love and I will never going to do it.



You aren't pure or moral by never falling in love.  I would argue you are the opposite for being greedy and keeping your heart to yourself.  Enjoy your loneliness though, because love is amazing and special.


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> You aren't pure or moral by never falling in love. I would argue you are the opposite for being greedy and keeping your heart to yourself. Enjoy your loneliness though, because love is amazing and special.


 
Hmmph...I doubt it, I have never feel "alone" in fact when people talk about feeling lonely I do not understand them, maybe because I have a twin brother who is always with me.

and I am not a troll...


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Hmmph...I doubt it, I have never feel "alone" in fact when people talk about feeling lonely I do not understand them, maybe because I have a twin brother who is always with me.
> 
> and I am not a troll...



Whatever you say.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Whatever you say.


 
I am always honest. I never lie.


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> I am always honest. *I never lie*.



You just did, because that is impossible.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> You just did, because that is impossible.


 
Well at least I try not to.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

You're weird... I still don't understand how you can not have any sort of attraction or feelings towards anyone, it's human/furry/whatever you call yourself nature.


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## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

This guy isn't weird, he's cool. He reminds me of an old friend I used to have back in 6th grade.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 7, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> You're weird... I still don't understand how you can not have any sort of attraction or feelings towards anyone, it's human/furry/whatever you call yourself nature.





yeah and it sucks if you say you have never had it because even 5 years old have those filling of be in with someone


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

KawaiiHusky said:


> yeah and it sucks if you say you have never had it because even 5 years old have those filling of be in with someone


 
I like love, love toward nature, family, friends. What I hate is romance, perversion that type of love.

and I am not religous.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> I like love, love toward nature, family, friends. What I hate is romance, perversion that type of love.
> 
> and I am not religous.




oh okay well that makes it sound like you have bent hurt before and gave up in love. sorry if it sound stupid or lame


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

KawaiiHusky said:


> oh okay well that makes it sound like you have bent hurt before and gave up in love. sorry if it sound stupid or lame


 
No, in my 21 years I have never fall in love or have any interest in dating. to me, it seems to impure for me and imoral. I hate it, even when I was a child I use to have ambivalent feelings toward those kind of things.


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## KawaiiHusky (Feb 7, 2009)

okay ^_^. well I actually want to find someone to be with me


----------



## Moka (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> IWhat I hate is romance, perversion that type of love.



Why do you group romance and perversion together? Romance is not a bad thing.

For example, let's say you're out on a date, and you decide to take your partner out to a candlelit dinner under the stars. There's a violinist playing soft music in the background, and otherwise it's just you two. Most people would consider this to be a romantic setting. What do you find immoral about this?

It's one thing to not want to take part in a relationship. But using the words "perverse" and "immoral" to describe love is a bit harsh, since that means you're condemning everybody who doesn't feel the way you do.


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

Moka said:


> Why do you group romance and perversion together? Romance is not a bad thing.
> 
> For example, let's say you're out on a date, and you decide to take your partner out to a candlelit dinner under the stars. There's a violinist playing soft music in the background, and otherwise it's just you two. Most people would consider this to be a romantic setting. What do you find immoral about this?
> 
> It's one thing to not want to take part in a relationship. But using the words "perverse" and "immoral" to describe love is a bit harsh, since that means you're condemning everybody who doesn't feel the way you do.


 
1.- you made me wish I could  get a girl friend >.<
2.- Thanks god he didn't use the word "*taboo"* on us


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## nurematsu (Feb 7, 2009)

this is an incredible thread ^^


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Moka said:


> Why do you group romance and perversion together? Romance is not a bad thing.
> 
> For example, let's say you're out on a date, and you decide to take your partner out to a candlelit dinner under the stars. There's a violinist playing soft music in the background, and otherwise it's just you two. Most people would consider this to be a romantic setting. What do you find immoral about this?
> 
> It's one thing to not want to take part in a relationship. But using the words "perverse" and "immoral" to describe love is a bit harsh, since that means you're condemning everybody who doesn't feel the way you do.


 
I will NEVER date, never!! UNDERSTAND!!

I hate romance AND perversion, I am not pairing both of them.


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> I will NEVER date, never!! UNDERSTAND!!
> 
> I hate romance AND perversion, I am not pairing both of them.



That's fine, no one would ever want to date you anyways.


----------



## Greyscale (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> That's fine, no one would ever want to date you anyways.



This.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> That's fine, no one would ever want to date you anyways.


 
That is actually what I want, nobody to date me.


----------



## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Well you are doing a fine job, now can we please not derail the topic more.  Thanks.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Well you are doing a fine job, now can we please not derail the topic more. Thanks.


 
Ohohoho, people can't stand someone as unique as me. OOOOOOOhohohoho!!


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Ohohoho, people can't stand someone as unique as me. OOOOOOOhohohoho!!



Sounds more like people just can't stand you because you're a misinformed, elitist prick.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> Sounds more like people just can't stand you because you're a misinformed, elitist prick.


 
Please impure one, don't talk to me.


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Please impure one, don't talk to me.



Like I said.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> Like I said.


 
Impure one, you shall be punished in a horrible sadistic way...one day you will..


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Impure one, you shall be punished in a horrible sadistic way...one day you will..



Well that is an impure thing of you to say.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> Well that is an impure thing of you to say.


 
No....I have a definition of what is pure..I am not religous.


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> No....I have a definition of what is pure..I am not religous.



How convenient that you can make up your own definitions of words to suit your own purposes!


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> How convenient that you can make up your own definitions of words to suit your own purposes!


 
One day, you will understand.

You must remember too, your true self as well..


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> One day, you will understand.
> 
> You must remember too, your true self as well..



wat


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

HOLY SHIT DAVID IS BACK! And to the weirdo, stop trying to tell people that your way is right, mostly everybody here hates people like that :|


----------



## SnowFox (Feb 7, 2009)

You know, at one point I was wondering if Mauru was David coming back under a new name for trolling purposes.... lol me.

I still don't believe he's for real though. Oh, and welcome back David 

EDIT: does this thread stick get locked at 501 even if it's stickied?


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> You know, at one point I was wondering if Mauru was David coming back under a new name for trolling purposes.... lol me.
> 
> I still don't believe he's for real though. Oh, and welcome back David
> 
> EDIT: does this thread stick get locked at 501 even if it's stickied?



That guy isn't a troll, he is just stupid.

Hi.


----------



## Chanticleer (Feb 7, 2009)

@ Mauru

What do you want?

No, seriously.


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Chanticleer said:


> @ Mauru
> 
> What do you want?
> 
> No, seriously.



Are you like incapable of stating your points outright or something so you just have to ask a thousand questions beforehand and then never get around to what you were trying to say because everyone loses interest in you or something?


----------



## SnowFox (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> That guy isn't a troll, he is just stupid.
> 
> Hi.



Yeah I realize that now. How impure of me.


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> Yeah I realize that now. How impure of me.



Impure as the drinking water in a third world country.


----------



## PriestRevan (Feb 7, 2009)

I think I should go into isolation with any bf I *might* have and just hope my parents never figure it out. 

Sounds exciting.


----------



## SnowFox (Feb 7, 2009)

502 I fail

Are threads not autolocking any more?


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

this thread has too much funny power to lock.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Bunch of worthless furries, with no morals, or guidence in living. I pity you all.


----------



## Uro (Feb 7, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> 502 I fail
> 
> Are threads not autolocking any more?



Why are you so bent out of shape about locking threads for srs?


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> That guy isn't a troll, he is just stupid.
> 
> Hi.


 
And you don't have any worth, you should be put in a hole, while people throw acid at you and make fun of you. Then dispuse of your worthless body in the trash. Nobody will care.


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Bunch of worthless furries, with no morals, or guidence in living. I pity you all.



Single worthless dumbass, who can't spell guidance.  I pity you.


Also, this thread was at one time used for something good.  Then you showed up!  Congrats!

(not very pure or moral of you!)


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## PriestRevan (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> And you don't have any worth, you should be put in a hole, while people throw acid at you and make fun of you. Then dispuse of your worthless body in the trash. Nobody will care.


 
You used to be cool. 

Now you're just mean.

I hate you. </3


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Single worthless dumbass, who can't spell guidance. I pity you.
> 
> 
> Also, this thread was at one time used for something good. Then you showed up! Congrats!
> ...


 
Something good? making people accept who they are so they will turn into a worthless person like you? impure, perverted and immoral? don't mention my errors, trashy person.


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Something good? making people accept who they are so they will turn into a worthless person like you? impure, perverted and immoral? don't mention my errors, trashy person.



L O L


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> L O L


 
Ha ha ha, how geeky. using "LOL" This only shows how of little value you are.

Just another ugly geek in the world, you should be of use for other people by using your usueless body for experiments.


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## PriestRevan (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Ha ha ha, how geeky. using "LOL" This only shows how of little value you are.
> 
> Just another ugly geek in the world, you should be of use for other people by using your usueless body for experiments.


 
You're calling us geeky while you're on the internet?

I've just become more confused.


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Ha ha ha, how geeky. using "LOL" This only shows how of little value you are.
> 
> Just another ugly geek in the world, you should be of use for other people by using your usueless body for experiments.




Please get off that computer that a geek invented.  Thank you.

Signed, The Internet


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Please get off that computer that a geek invented. Thank you.
> 
> Signed, The Internet


 
Well at least that person proved his worth...but you in the other hand....

OOOOOOohohohohoho!!

I become more depressed just thinking about you people.


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> You're calling us geeky while you're on the internet?
> 
> I've just become more confused.


 
Shut up ugly.


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## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

I would pursue this further but this guy isn't really worth my time.  Takumi can handle this one.


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> I would pursue this further but this guy isn't really worth my time. Takumi can handle this one.


 
Worth my time? ha ha ha ha!!


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## Greyscale (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Shut up ugly.



:roll:


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## PriestRevan (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Shut up ugly.


 
That's not what you said last night baby. <3


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Well at least that person proved his worth...but you in the other hand....
> 
> OOOOOOohohohohoho!!
> 
> I become more depressed just thinking about you people.


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Poor, poor worthless people...no more worth than shooting targets.


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## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

requesting a ban


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## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

I hope you don't hang yourself when you realize you are a demon spawn that was born as a result of an immoral act =(


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I hope you don't hang yourself when you realiz you are a demon spawn that was born as a result of an immoral act =(


 
Ewww...don't project your feelings into me...


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## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

Damn you my good sir, for those who reject and insult the views of others just becuase they are not his own, are the lowest form of scum.


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## PriestRevan (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Ewww...don't project your feelings into me...


 
I'll project more than feelings into you hun. <3


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> Damn you my good sir, for those who reject and insult the views of others just becuase they are not his own, are the lowest form of scum.


 
Little one...these group of people "furries" were the first one to insult me, just because I was different...

This only proves what kind of people you are....trashy ones.


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## Dyluck (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I hope you don't hang yourself when you realize you are a demon spawn that was born as a result of an immoral act =(



sex for procreation is an abomination.  everyone should only have babies through intra cytoplasmic injection.

you know what not even that, you just have to spontaneously divide like an amoeba.


----------



## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Little one...these group of people "furries" were the first one to insult me, just because I was different...
> 
> This only proves what kind of people you are....trashy ones.



I don't believe you know any furries, enjoy your hand.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru must not have a life outside trying to force his beliefs down other's throats :|


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I don't believe you know any furries, enjoy your hand.


 
Ewww...don't speak to me anymore, trashy person.


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## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

I PITTY THE CLOSED MINDED FOOL, AS IT IS CLEAR THAT HE IS IN GREAT NEED OF HELP.


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## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> I PITTY THE CLOSED MINDED FOOL, AS IT IS CLEAR THAT HE IS IN GREAT NEED OF HELP.


 
Philosphy is so vague and subjective...do not speak with it when facing my condition...please.


----------



## Takun (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Ewww...don't speak to me anymore, trashy person.



You are now aware that you get involuntary erections while you sleep at night.


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

Until you become more open minded you shall be worthless to the human race. You must stop trying to force your flawed ways onto others.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

Can we just ban him now? Seriously, he seems like some religious troll or some shit. Next thing that comes out of Mauru's mouth: "God hates furries". Bet you all five bucks it's gonna be that.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> Until you become more open minded you shall be worthless to the human race. You must stop trying to force your flawed ways onto others.


 
Vague, subjective.

I am not a troll...neither religous...I do not believe in god.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

Suuuuuuuuuuurrrreeeee.


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

I may be the only one who can relate to you here, yet you still act as a closed minded fool. I hope you someday change your ways, as it would be sad to see you go to waste.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> I may be the only one who can relate to you here, yet you still act as a closed minded fool. I hope you someday change your ways, as it would be sad to see you go to waste.


 
I am sorry...just my emotions clouded my logic...


----------



## Uro (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Vague, subjective.
> 
> I am not a troll...neither religous...I do not believe in god.



No you are most definitely a troll. It would pain me to think someone could be this stupid on their own accord.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Uro said:


> No you are most definitely a troll. It would pain me to think someone could be this stupid on their own accord.


 
Why? I must ask?


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## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

Thats better.


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

BECAUSE I'M STRAIGHT. LE GASP!


Lol jk people, I'm loveable and gay XD


----------



## Uro (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Why? I must ask?



Why does it pain me to think someone can be as stupid as yourself on their own accord?

Well first of all maybe you should re-read some of your posts. And if upon doing so you see no problems with what you're writing or your logic on whatever issue it is you're defending. Then you have some serious problems you need to get worked out.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> Thats better.


 
Please....help me...I am suffering so much, I wish i could come back to the system but I can't...is too far?

I see the doctor leaning toward something...then some little large animals-PEGUY-....some straw

The era of au e toi? has it ended? has it? pleas tell me it has...please...

please...

Have a new era started?


----------



## Uro (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Please....help me...I am suffering so much, I wish i could come back to the system but I can't...is too far?
> 
> I see the doctor leaning toward something...then some little large animals-PEGUY-....some straw
> 
> ...



What.

The.

Fuck.


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Please....help me...I am suffering so much, I wish i could come back to the system but I can't...is too far?
> 
> I see the doctor leaning toward something...then some little large animals-PEGUY-....some straw
> 
> ...


 
I want whatever he's smokin >.>


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

Every one is allowed their own say on a matter every now and then, its realy not worth you guys fighting over.


----------



## Moka (Feb 7, 2009)

Mauru said:


> Please....help me...I am suffering so much, I wish i could come back to the system but I can't...is too far?
> 
> I see the doctor leaning toward something...then some little large animals-PEGUY-....some straw
> 
> ...



Um, what?


----------



## Uro (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> Every one is allowed their own say on a matter every now and then, its realy not worth you guys fighting over.



Everyone can _have _an opinion. However it doesn't make it a good or right one. Was Hitlers opinion a good one. On a less extreme scale this guy is clearly not correct about his _thoughts _in the least bit what-so-ever.

And who are you anyhow?


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

As long as a person is still breathing, it is never too late to go back. Just remember what you did in the past, acept it, and try to make up for it. it is never too late.


----------



## Mauru (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> As long as a person is still breathing, it is never too late to go back. Just remember what you did in the past, acept it, and try to make up for it. it is never too late.


 
Everything seems fine again...thanks...I will do my best.


----------



## Uro (Feb 7, 2009)

Rakiao said:


> As long as a person is still breathing, it is never too late to go back. Just remember what you did in the past, acept it, and try to make up for it. it is never too late.



Both of you are clearly mentally disturbed.


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 7, 2009)

I am!


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

I am simply a young open minded furry, who is friends to all. I study the actions of people, but never force my ideas onto others. I am what ever I wish to be, as long as I can help others.


----------



## Rakiao (Feb 7, 2009)

If I am, I don't care as long as I can make others happy


----------



## Surgat (Feb 7, 2009)

Derailed. 

Mauru, your ideas about sex and sexuality are completely, rationally indefensible.


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Feb 8, 2009)

*Coming Out: The New Thread*

Okay, it is no secret that there are a lot of gay, bisexual, and confused furries out there in the fandom. This is a copypasta from yiffstar that I feel is one of the best and most helpful threads on there. The only problem being that it requires you be 18+ and have 30 posts to see. Now I know that people start having problems and questions much earlier than that. I felt that this would be a good thread to have on FA as well. I personally get messages from a lot of people questioning sexuality and how I dealt with it and asking for help with their confusion. Now I know this forum is 13+ So I humbly ask that this thread stay clean and ask that it be taken seriously, that people stay on topic, and maybe we can do some good on this forum.

 This thread is for people to tell their stories, ask questions, get help and advise, and is here as a support system for those who need it. 

  Here is the opening article

*Do you think you might be gay?* 

Sorry to be so direct because I know that thinking about this question can be a bit of a frightener, especially if you've never said the answer out loud. So for the moment, just think the answer inside your head, if that makes it easier. One thing you'll notice is that it feels like a really big deal the first time, but the more you say it, the less difficult it becomes.

This coming-out business sometimes seems rather unfair. Straights don't have to do it, so why should we? Straight people just assume that everyone is straight. Then they get hitched, have children, go to McDonald's and eventually slip peacefully away surrounded by their grandchildren and great-grandchildren... without passing Go, without collecting Â£200 and, in most cases, without going to jail.

Being gay, however, is a minority pursuit. But don't ever forget that, while there may be more of them than us, it doesn't mean that being straight is 'normal'... it's just very common. So don't worry. Being a gay man or a lesbian (gay women get an extra name all to themselves!) or bisexual isn't good or bad, right or wrong. It just is. But it does mean we do have to go through the very inconvenient step of dealing with other people's ideas about what we're like. And mostly that involves them assuming that we're straight, which we're not. So we have to come out. And put them straight on the matter.

So are you gay? Now there are lots of answers you could give to that... like 'Maybe' or 'I fancy the boy who sits next to me' or 'Girls make me tingle' or 'The secretary of the golf club makes my putter rise' or 'I don't really know' or 'Definitely' or 'Can't wait to find out' or 'I'm terrified even thinking about it'... OK, you could choose one of those but let's try a tentative 'Yes'.

*feeling really bad?*

If you think you may be gay, it might really get you down. And you might feel very frightened and very alone because you don't know what it means and you're terrified of what other people might think.

I can't say, 'Don't worry,' because you already are worrying. But I can say that you really must try to talk to someone about it. You are not alone in what's going on in your head. Many gay people feel terrible before they come to terms with who they are. This is not because being gay is bad but because society has not always been kind to us and often hasn't made us feel very welcome. But other gay people will and so will many, many straight people. So please get some support.

If you just want to talk to another gay person, try ringing your local gay switchboard, which will be listed in the phonebook. And in help and info, there are the phone numbers of helplines where someone will be there for you, completely confidentially. Talk to them. Don't be beaten by these feelings of fear or depression. Try to believe in yourself enough to get to that phone and call someone. It'll be worth it.
maybe you're bisexualâ€¦

What if you don't feel gay but you don't feel straight either? What if you have that full-on stomach flutter for the prettiest girl in the class and the horniest man in the canteen... what if you want to be a tile on the wall of both the boys' and the girls' showers? Well, you may not be gay or straight, you may be both.

You will hear a lot of chat about teenagers 'going through a phase' and 'experimenting' before they settle down. Usually the people who talk like this expect that eventually you'll opt for Friday night takeaways, 2.4 kids and married bliss. Although sometimes the hipper among them accept cheerily that you might be gay and settle down to Friday night takeaways, 2.4 cats and unmarried bliss.

But bi-sexuals are often left feeling that they just aren't trying hard enough. That they should damn well make up their mind and fit neatly into a world of strict categories. But don't be pressurised into either camp by gays or straights if you feel you're bi.

And don't forget there's sex and then there's relationships. If you've decided at any particular time in your life that you've fallen for someone of the same sex and are going out with them, then the normal rules apply whether you're bi or gay. Be honest with them and be faithful. Most people feel that being faithful is better than playing around.

But sometimes there's added pressure for bi-sexuals. Some say that they feel a little strained because the 'other side' of their sexuality is unfulfilled. Well, a male friend of mine who now lives with a woman says he satisfies that by playing sport with other men and going to the gym. It may work for you. Like a lot of people, gay, straight or bi, window shopping is enough for him.

But bi-sexuals say the most common difficulty is when they are unable to be honest. Maybe you are going out with someone and you just can't tell them because you think they might feel hurt or undermined or just plain angry. Or you're single and everybody thinks you're straight. And so the temptation is to go off and have gay sex secretly â€“ meeting through phone lines, in loos, cruising resorts, pubs, clubs... wherever. No harm in that, except that secrecy can be a terrible burden. Also, if you're not owning up to having gay sex and you're doing it on the sly, sometimes that means you don't take enough care to be safe. Always take precautions.

Just one further thing, and this really does happen. Sometimes everybody thinks you're gay but you feel you'd like to get into a bit of straight sex. And the big fear is the gay gang you hang around with might not take it too well. Well, follow your heart! They'll catch up. It may be a little difficult for your new partner at first, but you'll be surprised how quickly your ex-girlfriend gets on with your new boyfriend or vice versa... In fact, they'll be ganging up and both teasing you sooner than you can say 'how flattering to be the centre of everyone's attention'!
do you want to tell anybody?

Now you've 'come out' to yourself. Good job! It probably doesn't feel that different. I mean, it's not like, now you've decided you're gay or lesbian or bi, someone's going to give you a gay card with an instant gay or lesbian identity. You don't have to like Kylie Minogue, get a frock if you're a man or a tractor if you're a woman. Gay people come in all sizes â€“ white, black, Asian, Oriental, Eskimo, Native American... It's a big gay Tower of Babel out there with all cultures and all walks of life.

So don't forget that you're you, and now you've started to put the gay thing out of the way, you can get on with being just that. The only trouble is that you may find, when you tell someone else, they'll want to put you in a box. Resist this. Don't be a stereotype. Always stay true to yourself.

Now that you've opened up the possibility of following what you feel is in your heart, you'll probably want to tell someone. You don't have to, but if you do, here's a word of advice: not everyone you tell will think that Christmas has come! Some people will jump up and down at the news and think it's great, but others will think you're the devil himself, and a few â€“ and we really love these â€“ won't think it makes any difference at all. The most difficult thing about all this is that it's not always easy to predict how anyone will react.

So while coming out will probably feel like a great relief, it may also make you a bit tense for a while. You may feel apprehensive about telling the crowd you hang with because there may be guys or girls who you think may become aggressive about it. They may think it's trendy for pop stars, but they may not like you being gay. They may tease you; they may even try to hurt you. At work, you may worry that your boss will be nasty to you or deny you promotion, if you tell him/her. If you are the boss or the manager, you may worry that your authority will be undermined, that people will gossip behind your back. If you have kids, you may be frightened that being gay will be used by your co-parent or your parents-in-law â€“ or even your own parents â€“ to say that you're not fit to be a mum or dad.

These are the worst-case scenarios. All of them have happened, and as long as some people feel angry and hostile towards gay men and women, they will go on happening. But try to keep your head; don't let anxiety overcome you. In most cases, it'll be absolutely fine. You've just got to be a bit sensible in the face of this kind of stupidity.

First of all, think carefully about who you trust and just tell them. Get some troops on your side. Even if there's no trouble ahead, it'll make you feel good because the people who go on liking or loving you are the ones you will know are your real friends. If it looks like there might be a problem, give one of the helplines listed in help and info a ring. They'll know exactly how to advise you.

As a general rule, don't just leap in. Be prepared. Try to think what people's reactions might be. And decide how much you want to tell them. For instance, you may not want to let on whether you've had sex, or who with or where. Don't say anything you don't want to.

And be gentle. Remember it'll be them, not you, who might have a problem about you being gay. So maybe try to drop a few hints first to test the water (boys â€“ put a cherry in your pint; girls â€“ start watching Ellen). Try not to bounce people into it. I mean, don't sit at Christmas lunch with all the family and say loudly: 'Can you pass the salt... to a homosexual?'

*friends*

They are probably the easiest people to tell. Tell your closest and oldest friends first. They will probably feel very protective towards you. Of course, some may react badly. They may worry about being thought gay themselves and, I'm afraid, you may just lose their friendship. But on the whole, trust your friends. They will be your greatest allies.

If you're young, your friends may well just find your being gay kind of intriguing but reasonably ordinary. Don't expect fanfares â€“ as if you're something special!

If you're older, you may be more nervous, if only because your friends have thought you're straight for longer. But really close friends may feel very proud and touched that you've chosen to tell them.

*school mates*

I'm sorry if this sounds alarmist, but watch out for bullies and make sure you know a sympathetic teacher.

It can be tough at school. Most people these days have all seen EastEnders, Hollyoaks, In&Out, My Best Friend's Wedding and all the other gay people on TV or in the movies, so they should be quite used to the idea. If they're not, they're idiots... but, sadly, some of them are. So just look after yourself and don't tell anyone at all unless you feel confident.

*college mates*

At college or university, there will probably be a lesbian, gay and bisexual group. Join even if you leave seconds later. That way you'll meet people. It tends to be much easier to come out at college or university. And who knows: you may meet your first love. (Make 'aaaah' sounds now and think of little puppies...)

If you're in a club or a society or a sports team or you're the West Dorset tiddlywinks champ, or Ms Pottery Evening Class or whatever, just get one thing straight in your head. You're no different from the prop forward or the bridge demon or the tennis doubles partner or the gardener you were before you came out.

You do these things because they're a laugh. And nothing is going to get in the way of that. This is a classic time to remember that being gay is not all of you. It's just one bit and it definitely shouldn't affect the way you climb a mountain or sail a boat. If you do have trouble, look in the gay press and see if you can find a gay or lesbian club devoted to your interest. You'll be amazed at what's available!

*work colleagues*[/u]

Has anyone else come out in your workplace? How did it go down? Who was OK about it? Why not try to tell them about yourself first?

And don't feel obliged to come out. Work is not your private life and you may want to keep the two separate. But don't get yourself into the position where you have to lie. It horribly uncomfortable. There's nothing worse than being asked to dinner or the pub and 'Do bring your girlfriend/boyfriend' when you haven't got one and never will. Just think ahead about what you would want to do in that situation. And do what makes you feel comfortable.

If your job involves kids, be careful: people can be very bigoted about gay people. So just watch out and don't let them give you a hard time. Make sure your boss, if she or he's sympathetic, or your trade union rep knows and will stand up for you if there's trouble. Your union may have a gay and lesbian section.

*family*

This can be a tricky one. Mainly because, by telling them, you will probably knock their expectations. For one thing, most parents expect to have grandchildren. Now, you may well one day have kids, but your average stick-in-the-mud grown-up doesn't tend to have that possibility in the 'gay file' in their brain.

Second, don't forget: you may be 15 or 25 or 55 but you're still their 'little girl' or 'little boy'. Parents don't find it easy to think about their kids having sex anyway, let alone having gay sex. They've heard all sorts of dreadful rumours and scurrilous, ill-informed gossip about what we 'do in bed' so they may be shocked. My suggestion would be to avoid discussing your sex life with your parents, whether you're gay, straight or in a religious order. It's none of their business.

Now, if you do want to tell your parents, try to be compassionate. They know far less about it all than you, and they may need time. You may want to write to them so that they have a chance to talk to each other first. Or you may want to sit them down and tell them face to face. Try not to make it a confrontation of any kind.

If they have found out already â€“ because they've discovered your gay mags under the bed, or a neighbour saw you at the local gay pub or snogging your work mate, or whatever â€“ and they confront you, your best bet is to come clean. This may be very frightening. In the worst possible case, they may really over-react and throw you out if you're living at home. Don't panic. I know that's easy to say, but do try to stay calm underneath the tears and the turmoil. Either find a friend to stay with until your mum and dad get back on their trolley. Or phone one of the helplines you can find in help and info and ask for advice.

Before you do any of this with your parents, you may find it easier to tell your brothers or sisters. There's no guarantee that they'll be Mr and Ms Hipster about it, and they might just freak out because you share a room with them, or it makes them think they're gay, or they think their friends are going to give them a hard time or whatever. Don't forget that you might be dealing with morons here. Who knows? But think about it. You should have a pretty good idea of what they're like. And don't forget that brothers or sisters who feel easy about you being gay can be a great help in calming parents.

*heterosexual partners*

You don't have to be an agony aunt to know that telling your fiancÃ© or wife or husband that, in fact, you're gay or lesbian can be a bit delicate. So do realise that they might feel very let down or rejected and that they might become very angry. Perhaps they feel you've cheated them somehow. So be gentle. You probably do love them, even if not sexually. So try to respect that love, and them. And you won't be the first couple this has happened to. If you doubt that, call Relate (the number is in help and info) and they'll tell you. And they can also help you.

*your kids*

Tread carefully. How old are your kids? What will they understand? How will being a bit different (that is, having a gay parent) affect them at school? Would it be helpful to tell their teacher in case they get any trouble from other kids? It's much more important that your children are happy than it is that you tell them you're gay. You may want to wait, follow their natural curiosity and just answer their questions as they come up. Lots of parents have gone through this, so call one of the helplines and find someone to talk to. The advice you receive will be invaluable â€“ and confidential.
does AIDS frighten you?

Your family may, of course, be worried about AIDS. And so might you. So let's say one thing right out. AIDS develops from HIV, which can be contracted as a result of unprotected sex. There are some rules about having sex (see below) and there are very experienced and friendly people around to give you advice (see help and info). If you don't know, then ask. Ignorance in life is generally a bad thing (although you may do well never to find out about folk dancing). If you're worried about AIDS, always ask for advice, and above all, never do anything sexually that you don't want to. That's never, ever.

AIDS frightens us all. But since it first appeared on the scene, a great deal of research has been done, and there is a lot of good advice about how to avoid the risk of infection.

HIV is the virus that can lead to AIDS and it can be passed on through sex. Even if you're not thinking of having sex for a while, be a little Boy Scout or Girl Guide â€“ be prepared! These are the basics as far as sexual transmission is concerned:

    * HIV is found in blood and in semen (men) and vaginal fluid (women).
    * Sex that lets any of these into your body is a risk for HIV infection/AIDS.
    * Having anal sex and not using a strong condom is the highest-risk thing to do for both partners.
* Oral sex is believed to cause HIV infection only rarely and so is classed as 'safer sex'. However, to be extra careful, avoid it.
    * There is no risk of HIV infection from kissing or masturbation.
    * If you want to know more about what precautions to take, phone a helpline and ask.

*Do not do anything sexual that you do not want to do. Use your head at all times.
what next?*

Well, Rule No. One is: Don't rush it, if you don't want to. Take things at your own pace. And don't feel that you've got to fit, willy nilly, into the gay scene and speed off to your nearest gay bar. You may not like bars. Or you may like bars but you want to go to the ones you've always gone to with the friends you've always had. Don't be bullied by some image you might have in your mind about how to be gay. And anyway, these days, gay bars are not all the same. So find one you like. And if you feel nervous about going to a bar or a club, take a friend with you. Nowadays, clubs and pubs are very mixed: gay/straight, male/female. This can be great, although occasionally confusing when you fancy the boy by the bar and he turns out to be dating the girl that the lesbian next to you is getting hot and bothered about. But wow, folks, it is a new millennium.

On the other hand, if you can't wait to dive fully naked into the gay scene and go clubbing every night, have sex, join Stonewall's Equality Campaign, call all men 'darling' and slap all women on the back, then be our guest. Just do what feels good for you.

A good way to begin is to buy one of the gay mags or papers. They have listings of all the gay pubs, clubs, helplines, sex lines (which are expensive and will show up on your phone bill, so you've been warned!)... in fact, the lot. You can get the Gay Times and Diva in most newsagents â€“ although the copies are often put on the top shelf and you feel like you're buying porn. Well, you're not. The PinkPaper is distributed free mainly to gay venues.

Sometimes it takes a bit of courage to go up to the counter and ask for a gay publication, and you may not want to do it at your local newsagent, particularly if you haven't told your family or friends yet. So if you don't feel confident about buying a paper, phone your local gay switchboard, which will be listed in the phonebook.

People often feel that gay clubs are very youth-oriented, and they often are. But look, as far as we know there's no youth serum in the world, so you're stuck with your age. Enjoy it whether you're 16 or 76. And the first time you go to a pub or club, you might just feel great about it, a real sense that you've 'come home'. But you might feel nervous. So try to relax, try and talk to someone and don't feel you have to chat them up or aim for sex with them. Go easy on yourself â€“ you've got the rest of your life to enjoy being gay.

Don't feel weird about going to clubs and pubs as if they're just illicit places to meet people for sex. You're just doing what everybody else â€“ gay or straight â€“ has been doing on every night of the week since Eve gave Adam a Granny Smith's. Don't feel guilty. And don't feel sex is the only reason for going.

There are also tons of gay and lesbian clubs and campaigns and groups. So you don't have to meet other gay people by the bar. You can meet them halfway up a mountain or lobbying the House of Commons. Look in the listings in the gay press.

what to do if your parents throw a wobbler

Well, we need to get them help. The best place is one of the parents' organisations, such as Parents' Enquiry, started by the wonderful Rose Robertson who is about 900 years old now and has been doing this since the 1960s. Her volunteers â€“ all parents of gays and lesbians â€“ can help you, and they can also talk to your parents if you like.

Often parents can't cope because they're very religious. There is a lesbian and gay Christian movement and there is nothing, despite what people say, to stop you being gay and religious. In fact, in the case of many vicars, quite the reverse seems to be true.

In general, it might be good, before you tell your parents, to have a friend on standby, in case anything goes wrong. If your parents get violent or try to take you to the priest or the doctor, resist. They have no legal power over you to do anything about the fact that you're gay. Nothing will stop you being gay â€“ because you are. And they probably just need calming down. But if you do need legal advice â€“ and, remember, your parents have no rights over you â€“ call your local gay switchboard.

*what to do if your parents don't throw a wobbler*

Celebrate and offer to rent them out to anybody whose parents aren't coping well. Seriously, if they are fine about it, they can be a huge help to others. You will find that, if your parents are known to have no problem about you being gay, other friends will come and talk to them if they feel worried.


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Feb 8, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

*what to do if you're ethnically enhanced â€“ trad families can be a nightmare*

In many of the minority communities in Britain, being gay can be particularly difficult because of the strong emphasis on traditional family and marriage. The family may be doubly important and very tightly knit because it can protect its members from the effects of racism. So telling your family that you're gay if you're Asian or West Indian might feel trebly difficult. You may end up feeling excluded from your own community.

However, remember that, even if it's really difficult for you, other people have done it before. There are groups of Asian and black gay people you can phone or go along to meet. Their experiences will help you. And who knows? You might meet someone. Then you can go back to your parents and tell them that you're gay, but the good news is that you're going out with another black guy/girl!
what the law says

The Labour government spent two years of its first term in government trying to get a law passed that would equalise the age of consent. Although the House of Commons voted for the change, the House of Lords voted against it. This meant the bill had to go back to the Commons to be voted on again. In December 2000, after the Lords had thrown the bill out for the third time, Prime Minister Tony Blair invoked the Parliament Act â€“ a rarely used mechanism used to override the House of Lords. On 8 January 2001 the age of consent was finally equalised at 16 for everyone, whether gay, heterosexual (straight) or bisexual. No age is specified for lesbians.

But don't feel that means you have to. Just do what feels right to you. And don't forget that whether you're gay or straight you can always say no to someone who wants to have sex with you when you don't.
take it easy

 * Beware drugs and alcohol in the previously mentioned palaces of pleasure. Make sure you know the effects of anything you drink or take.
* If you go home with someone, always make sure you have safe sex â€“ and if you don't know what that means, ring one of the helplines for advice (see help and info).

If you're gay, you may be a fairy but coming out isn't a magic wand. Just coming to terms with your lesbian or gay sexuality can create problems in the short term. So take it easy. Don't expect some magical world to open up immediately. But, on the other hand, it will be a lot, lot, lot better than being trapped in a twilight zone of indecision in your own mind.

Coming out is not some cure-all for every problem in your world. Don't forget you're still the same person both sides of the line.

*yahoo! I'm alive!*

You're home free. Now the really difficult bit starts. You have to get on with the business of living and being as happy or stimulated or lazy or brilliant or stupid as you can and fulfill whatever your destiny holds for you.

There aren't any rules, but being gay can throw up problems that others don't have to deal with. These problems are mainly the result of prejudice from other people and you will have to find your own way of dealing with them. Things have changed enormously for the better in recent years, but we still don't live in a land where everybody gets sweeties and gum. And we probably never will. But remember one thing: being gay doesn't make you good or bad, right or wrong, happy or unhappy... those are just decisions you have to make once you've got used to being gay. So great good gay luck to you!


*My story

*My own coming out went extremely well. I was lucky to have the support of my then-boyfriend and a couple gay friends I knew from school, as well as a few people I knew from here. I was at the bookstore the week before and saw a book called "Now That you Know: A Parent's Guide To Understanding Your Gay Children" and thought it might help, so I bought it. (Only later did I realize it was a little presumptuous [right word?], like "Mom, Dad, I'm gay. Here's a book about how to accept me!" But anyway...) I wrote my mom a letter that took forever because I was starting to have second thoughts and dragging my feet, but I managed to hack it out anyway. The next day before school, I put the book and the letter in an envelope and left. I came out to my little brother as we were on our way home from school, he took it well I guess... just laughed and went back to his ipod... Lots of other stuff happened, but long story short, she acted like nothing was different for a while then approached me later and told me I didn't have to worry about telling them things like this, and were worried because they thought I would get hurt because of this, and felt guilty because I had to go through this alone (I didn't, of course, but it's not like they could have known that). For practical purposes, nothing is different. They understand it's not a choice, I didn't ask to be this way, and it doesn't change anything.

So tl;dr, seek guidance and support where you can. Even if you're not lucky enough to have gay friends, the fandom is full of us.


----------



## Ð˜Ð²Ð°Ð½ (Feb 8, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

**I noticed the previous thread went into a downspiral of failure and was eventually locked. So I took the liberty of reposting it.

Now, maybe we can have a fresh start here. Can you all try to behave so the past doesn't repeat itself?

***Maybe if I'm extremely bored later on, I'll run through and fix up the grammar and such.


----------



## Breeze (Feb 8, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

I linked the previous thread from my FA page, it's very useful stuff.
I'll change the link to this one now


----------



## Qoph (Feb 8, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

Lol, bridge.

I plan on talking with my psychologist before deciding who to tell, if anyone at all.  Same with being furry.


----------



## Magikian (Feb 8, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

Right now, I'm bisexual, but I'm guessing that's just a phase and I'll turn out either straight or gay.

Only time will tell, I guess.


----------



## SuperFurryBonzai (Feb 8, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

i would say im straight if anybody asked me but i have a gay friend and i feel like "that way" when im around him i also like women and have considered bisexuality but i might just be confused..?


----------



## PriestRevan (Feb 9, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

Well, I'm bisexual.

Since I sadly can't imagine myself in a straight relationship (I'm not dealing with female problems), I'll either end up in a gay relationship and never tell my family or stay alone in a small apartment.


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Feb 9, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

A gay guy in one of my previous classes told me I 'look' bi who leans more towards guys... 

Anyway, I don't really know what I am so I just say I'm just plain horny.


----------



## bozzles (Feb 9, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

I'm gay. Only my three closest friends and a family therapist know.

EDIT: Oh, and FAF. And my best internet friend.


----------



## Uro (Feb 9, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

After meeting two fellow gay people on campus I think I'd rather tell my straight friends now. At least I know they won't try to hit on me every waking hour and chat with me on aim the second I sign on/not afk.

Beginning to think I'm one of the few who's not a total horndog. Or maybe it's just standards....meh.


----------



## Gavrill (Feb 9, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

Bisexual. Originally I was a lesbian, but I fell hard for one of my (rather feminine) guyfriends. My grandparents don't want me to talk about it. I guess it's better than kicking me out like my dad's parents did.


----------



## Jenzo770 (Feb 9, 2009)

*Re: Coming Out: The New Thread*

I guess I'm bisexual, I think... Aw, what the hell, I can't go just poking in stuff without diggin into it. I'm Bi, there. Now, who should I tell first?
No seriously, I don't even think I need to tell anyone. It kinda feels that they all know. I know it sounds crazy, but everyone acts like it. Strange.


----------



## micolithe (Feb 9, 2009)

I used to tell people I was bisexual because it feels more "acceptable" if there's a remote chance you might end up in a straight relationship. For a while I even believed it myself.


----------



## LizardKing (Feb 9, 2009)

I... I...

I actually.... You know...

I ate McDonalds recently. AND I LIKED IT.

*hides in shame*


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## Uro (Feb 9, 2009)

micolithe said:


> I used to tell people I was bisexual because it feels more "acceptable" if there's a remote chance you might end up in a straight relationship. For a while I even believed it myself.



Yea, I find it's easier to say that as well. But the trouble you will get into is if you tell your parents you're bi they will either say it's a "phase" no matter your age or they won't believe you because they think you're unsure.


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## Takun (Feb 9, 2009)

Uro said:


> Yea, I find it's easier to say that as well. But the trouble you will get into is if you tell your parents you're bi they will either say it's a "phase" no matter your age or they won't believe you because they think you're unsure.




My parents still think I'm bi even though I said gay.  They don't want to give up the dream...


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## PriestRevan (Feb 9, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> My parents still think I'm bi even though I said gay. They don't want to give up the dream...


 
Make out with a man in front of them.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 9, 2009)

Yeah, a lot of my parents arepressuring me to have kids, and according to them, adopting isn't good enough. I told them I'm not interested in females, but they keep trying to get random females they know to uh....How can I say this in a clean way....Well, you know. Anyway, it's pissing me off ._.


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## Takun (Feb 9, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Make out with a man in front of them.



See that's the thing.  You can make out with a man and be bi.  They will never stop hoping.  My aunt is bi.  My soon to be cousin inlaw(?) is bi.  Said she was a lesbian before.

It's impossible to prove.


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## Xaerun (Feb 9, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Make out with a man in front of them.


That sure will prove he's GAY not BI!a
Oh wait... no.


----------



## Uro (Feb 9, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Yeah, a lot of my parents arepressuring me to have kids, and according to them, adopting isn't good enough. I told them I'm not interested in females, but they keep trying to get random females they know to uh....How can I say this in a clean way....Well, you know. Anyway, it's pissing me off ._.



You're 16, there's absolutely no way that your parents are trying to get female suitors for you.


----------



## PriestRevan (Feb 9, 2009)

Xaerun said:


> That sure will prove he's GAY not BI!a
> Oh wait... no.


 
Gays suck.

-end-

Besides, most people I know would come to the conclusion of one being gay/lesbian instead of thinking that a person is bi....



Takumi_L said:


> See that's the thing. You can make out with a man and be bi. They will never stop hoping. My aunt is bi. My soon to be cousin inlaw(?) is bi. Said she was a lesbian before.
> 
> It's impossible to prove.


 
You'd have to do a lot of really gay things.

Ever considered acting like a flaming gay?


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 9, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> See that's the thing.  You can make out with a man and be bi.  They will never stop hoping.  My aunt is bi.  My soon to be cousin inlaw(?) is bi.  Said she was a lesbian before.
> 
> It's impossible to prove.



The balls have to be touching.  That is the only way.


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 9, 2009)

Uro said:


> You're 16, there's absolutely no way that your parents are trying to get female suitors for you.


 
I'm 18 x.x


----------



## Dyluck (Feb 9, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I'm 18 x.x



Whatever dude, you're 16.


----------



## Uro (Feb 9, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I'm 18 x.x



Whatever, unless you're living in Saudi Arabia I sincerely doubt that your parents are bringing you random women to have sex with.


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## Kurama17 (Feb 9, 2009)

My parents want to "turn me straight", but I told them it wasn't going to happen. They think I'm some sex crazed person who's looking to have sex with anything, and they know a few sluts.


----------



## Uro (Feb 9, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> My parents want to "turn me straight", but I told them it wasn't going to happen. They think I'm some sex crazed person who's looking to have sex with anything, and they know a few sluts.



Isn't that statement an oxymoron? You turn down their "supposed" offers of illegal underage sex, yet you say they think you are a sex crazed fiend that has sex with everything? I don't see this being true.


----------



## DracoDark (Feb 9, 2009)

i just feel like saying something

yeah i told my friends and my mom im bi

gotta work on telling my dad and many siblings

but my mom said if i need help telling them shell help me so thats good ^_^

and the rest of my family will find out if/when i date a guy and take him to a family get together


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 9, 2009)

Uro said:


> Isn't that statement an oxymoron? You turn down their "supposed" offers of illegal underage sex, yet you say they think you are a sex crazed fiend that has sex with everything? I don't see this being true.


 
What I meant by it is that they thought I was only saying I was gay to get more sex, but my family's stupid and religious, and they think they're right all the time. But I've stopped caring, because they never learn.


----------



## Uro (Feb 9, 2009)

DracoDark said:


> i just feel like saying something
> 
> yeah i told my friends and my mom im bi
> 
> ...



Hope it works out for ya. On my end my parents are divorced. Liberal mom is cool with it, however conservative dad has yet to be informed, along with conservative family. But in due time.


----------



## DracoDark (Feb 9, 2009)

Uro said:


> Hope it works out for ya. On my end my parents are divorced. Liberal mom is cool with it, however conservative dad has yet to be informed, along with conservative family. But in due time.


 
my parents are also divorced and my moms cool with it

but my dad might be a little different(he was in the military a long time ago so idk how he'll react)

and i dont think one of my older bros is gonna be too happy but he'll learn to accept it

idk how the whole of my family will react though : /


----------



## Uro (Feb 9, 2009)

DracoDark said:


> my parents are also divorced and my moms cool with it
> 
> but my dad might be a little different(he was in the military a long time ago so idk how he'll react)
> 
> ...



Eh, your siblings grew up in a different era than your parents did. In this generation homosexuality is more widely accepted than it was even 10 years ago. My brother and sister were cool with it.

Parents will take a little longer, they expect you to have grandchildren for them and get married and shit. Telling them you're gay kinda lets the rain fall on their plans and dreams for you. But just let them know it's _your _life and it makes _you _happy, which in the end is the most important thing.


----------



## DracoDark (Feb 9, 2009)

Uro said:


> Eh, your siblings grew up in a different era than your parents did. In this generation homosexuality is more widely accepted than it was even 10 years ago. My brother and sister were cool with it.
> 
> Parents will take a little longer, they expect you to have grandchildren for them and get married and shit. Telling them you're gay kinda lets the rain fall on their plans and dreams for you. But just let them know it's _your _life and it makes _you _happy, which in the end is the most important thing.


 
ehh my mom was completely fine with it when i told her

and im pretty sure my family will be fine with it as well, but theres always that doubt there : /

theyll know eventually though

most likely with the way things are going atm :3 . . . hopefully XD

*is being slightly pessimistic XD*


----------



## TheAffliction (Feb 10, 2009)

I've been meaning to tell a certain person, and today, while we were just hanging out at lunch, this guy says, "Let's all make it our goal to get laid by the end of the month."

I almost brought it up right then and there... But I'll find a time to pull my friend aside and tell her. I think she's the safest person to tell.


----------



## Uro (Feb 10, 2009)

TheAffliction said:


> I've been meaning to tell a certain person, and today, while we were just hanging out at lunch, this guy says, "Let's all make it our goal to get laid by the end of the month."
> 
> I almost brought it up right then and there... But I'll find a time to pull my friend aside and tell her. I think she's the safest person to tell.



Women seem to take it easier I've found.


----------



## TheAffliction (Feb 10, 2009)

Uro said:


> Women seem to take it easier I've found.


Well, yeah. For the most part women are the only other people that like men


----------



## Uro (Feb 10, 2009)

TheAffliction said:


> Well, yeah. For the most part women are the only other people that like men



That and also women are generally more open and accepting than men are.


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 10, 2009)

True


----------



## Xaerun (Feb 10, 2009)

David M. Awesome said:


> The balls have to be touching.  That is the only way.


QFT


----------



## Jonnaius (Feb 11, 2009)

Guys, a word of warning. If you think your parents might take it bad, be careful on how you act, and don't get drunk near them.

I think my parents have guessed due to my behaviour and through drunkenly knowing all the dance moves to ABBA at a new year party, lol. I wasnt acting completely gay, but there might have been subtle hints.

Anyway, I now basically live in my room and dont come out except for meals, which are tense and scary because they sit and glare at me from the opposite end of the table. They constantly shout at me for no reason, and thats not just the teenage no reason, i mean actually no reason. Apparently I'm not working hard enough in school...even though I got all A* in my results. And so on...

So basically, they havent taken it well. The only reason they havent thrown me out is because they dont want me to live on the streets.

So yeah, be careful about how you act, and good luck telling them!


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 11, 2009)

Jonnaius said:


> Guys, a word of warning. If you think your parents might take it bad, be careful on how you act, and don't get drunk near them.
> 
> I think my parents have guessed due to my behaviour and through drunkenly knowing all the dance moves to ABBA at a new year party, lol. I wasnt acting completely gay, but there might have been subtle hints.
> 
> ...


 Damn, that really sucks. It's pretty much the same story with me, but I stopped caring. When they call me a fag, I say "Yeah, and your point is?", and when they say I'm gonna go to hell, I just tell them to fuck themselves.


----------



## Gestinatio (Feb 15, 2009)

I'm with someone waaayy back there in the depths of page 11.

I don't want to tell anyone incase it's a phase.


----------



## FoxxLegend (Feb 18, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> *Facepalms* No, the user, FoxyMcCloud...The blue kitsune....
> 
> 
> And trust me, people calling you faggot isn't as bad as getting beat down, even though I would prefer being called something than getting my ass kicked.


 
I may be way behind on this one but: Hell, emotional pain can hurt just as much as physical pain. Just matters in the way it's delivered. Personally, I've been pissed off enough at myself that I've actually kicked my own ass before. Sad right?


----------



## Gubbinz schiwifty-five (Feb 19, 2009)

A+++ Thread.
Will read again. :V

I thought so much of this thread I gave you a list of things to blame your problems on. I also recommend destroying them if possible:
Your Hormones (a pair of scissors or a cork will do the trick)
TV (dirty dirty dirty)
The Internet (Especially you guys and 4chan)
Your Dog/Cat (for making you furry)
Your Bed (for making you wake up grouchy)
Your food (for not being nutritious)
Being abused in Uncle Brian's Locked Basement. (...)
OIFY (You'll Figure It Out)
Doctors Medication (*ITS SATAN IN A JAR!*)
Parents (asdfssklkjjfss)

And on and on. Good day!


----------



## Midi Bear (Feb 20, 2009)

Gubbinz schiwifty-five said:


> Being abused in Uncle Brian's Locked Basement. (...)


Oh, is that one for me? If so, it wasn't in his locked basement. It was just out in the open child beating.


----------



## Uro (Feb 20, 2009)

Gubbinz schiwifty-five said:


> Being abused in Uncle Brian's Locked Basement. (...)



Best time of my life.


----------



## MauruNeko (Feb 20, 2009)

Uro said:


> Best time of my life.


 
............


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 20, 2009)

MauruNeko said:


> ............


 
What's wrong Neko? Can't deal with sarcasm? XD


----------



## SnickersTheCat (Feb 22, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> What's wrong Neko? Can't deal with sarcasm? XD


 Your going to hell >:U
Then your going to say "fuck you" and I'll say: "yes plz" ^_^. 



Haha, no I kid. I'm straight. 
But you can deal with sarcasm right?


----------



## Kurama17 (Feb 24, 2009)

SnickersTheCat said:


> Your going to hell >:U
> Then your going to say "fuck you" and I'll say: "yes plz" ^_^.
> 
> 
> ...


 I can, most of the time XD


----------



## Loken (Mar 4, 2009)

Question: If one were to be bi does one need to come out about it or do you just kinda go with the flow and avoid potential drama?


----------



## Kit H. Ruppell (Mar 5, 2009)

Well, having become bi myself within the past 4 months (and then gotten laid with 3 guys and a girl since!), I can say it's no big deal, unless you're more into guys. I'm more into girls though, and I can't see myself spending my life with a male. Different people may want to approach this situation in different ways.


----------



## KadenShadows (Mar 5, 2009)

See, I lucked out on this topic. My Dad was pretty cool with me being bi. How could he not be? He is! ^_^
My mom, however...she's a hardcore rightwing conservative Christian, and she thinks I'm going through a phase, or going to hell. :/
Either way, this is a very, VERY useful thread! I'm glad it got stickied, and thank you, Takumi, for posting it!


----------



## Loken (Mar 5, 2009)

Kit H. Ruppell said:


> Well, having become bi myself within the past 4 months (and then gotten laid with 3 guys and a girl since!), I can say it's no big deal, unless you're more into guys. I'm more into girls though, and I can't see myself spending my life with a male. Different people may want to approach this situation in different ways.


No big deal after "coming out" or no big deal meeting people if you haven't "come out"?


----------



## jagdwolf (Mar 6, 2009)

I came out saw my shadow and decided that there needed to be 6 more weeks of sex just to make sure I had the right sexual choice.


----------



## Kurama17 (Mar 6, 2009)

KadenShadows said:


> See, I lucked out on this topic. My Dad was pretty cool with me being bi. How could he not be? He is! ^_^
> My mom, however...she's a hardcore rightwing conservative Christian, and she thinks I'm going through a phase, or going to hell. :/
> Either way, this is a very, VERY useful thread! I'm glad it got stickied, and thank you, Takumi, for posting it!


That's fucking awesome XD

Well, not about the mom, I mean about the dad


----------



## KenjiKitsune (Mar 7, 2009)

Yup. n.n I'm bi and know it. I'm not ashamed.. but.. I can't tell anyone because I live in the conservative "Bible Belt" of the south. T.T Which sucks because I could never tell anyone or I will be an outcast from family and such. *sighs*


----------



## Ooxman (Mar 8, 2009)

I just came out to my parents a few days ago, and they took it really well.  Our relationship, and my self esteem in general, feels WAY better.  They kinda knew about it, or at least suspected, so it wasn't a shock or anything.  I didn't even want to tell them, but I REALLY needed someone to talk to, and they were the only ones around.  I used to think it was, frankly, none of their business... but I know now that they're really loving and cool with it... and that feels pretty good.  

As for my friends/coworkers... nah, can't tell them.  I live in a small, angry town, and I'm fairly well known... it just won't work.


----------



## Aquin (Mar 9, 2009)

I wish i had seen this post when i came out to my mom. Thankfully she is accepting of it, but we have not spoken of it since and that I'm fine with. 

My dad on the otherhand.. i made mom swear not to tell him.


----------



## Sektor225 (Mar 9, 2009)

i came out to my parents last september or was it november....well when i told them my dad started treating me like crap and my mom wont stop crying when i try to talk to her. sometimes i think i should of not told them.


----------



## Kurama17 (Mar 12, 2009)

Well, I'm pondering on coming out to my mom this summer, but the outcomes have kind of sent me into a deep depression, as well as some other things, so I don't know if I should do it or keep my mouth shut.


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## PriestRevan (Mar 12, 2009)

Everytime I come to this thread, I suddenly become depressed or horribly confused.

Fuck you guys.


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## Gavrill (Mar 12, 2009)

I came out to my parents when I was 15. My mother was...strangely thrilled, and my father was just glad that I didn't keep it in. However, the rest of my dad's family hate it. My mom's family is okay with it though. I'm grateful to have accepting parents.


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## PriestRevan (Mar 13, 2009)

Misfit said:


> I came out to my parents when I was 15. My mother was...strangely thrilled, and my father was just glad that I didn't keep it in. However, the rest of my dad's family hate it. My mom's family is okay with it though. I'm grateful to have accepting parents.


 
That's because nobody really hates lesbians. Many "hateful" straight males often are more than willing to watch lesbians fuck, no matter how "un-godly" it may be.

Gays on the other hand...


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## Kurama17 (Mar 13, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Everytime I come to this thread, I suddenly become depressed or horribly confused.
> 
> Fuck you guys.


 When and where?


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## Gavrill (Mar 13, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> That's because nobody really hates lesbians. Many "hateful" straight males often are more than willing to watch lesbians fuck, no matter how "un-godly" it may be.
> 
> Gays on the other hand...


My biological father is bisexual, actually. And so is my aunt on my mother's side. So I'm thinking that maybe they're just used to hearing it.


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## PriestRevan (Mar 13, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> When and where?


 
April 4th, 10:01 am, Atlantic Ocean.


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 13, 2009)

I'm going to wait until college to come out.



PriestRevan said:


> That's because nobody really hates lesbians. Many "hateful" straight males often are more than willing to watch lesbians fuck, no matter how "un-godly" it may be.
> 
> Gays on the other hand...



That is so true. I don't understand why that police officer who caused a controversy for making two lesbian girls who were making out in a mall leave. When you see two lesbian chicks making out you don't interfere. You _watch_.



Kurama17 said:


> When and where?



Hahahaha.


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## Kurama17 (Mar 13, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> April 4th, 10:01 am, Atlantic Ocean.


 Water sex? Awesome


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 13, 2009)

Takumi that story is truly sad. I'm still in the closet to my parents, friends, realatives, etc.. You guys are the first to hear I'm gay. Well now I feel slightly better telling somebody... I think I might be okay telling my friend I met at Sierra Blanca Honor Band in NM! (Band-Geeks ftw!) she's very nice and has a gay friend anyway. But still coming out to my family I'd have to wait until they don't have to pay for anything for me anymore, college i.e. The big problem is I still want to have kid's of my own bloodline, but I don't want them with 2 father's. I'd be so worried that they would have to go through constant bullying and alienation at school. So it's truly difficult on my part.


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## ~furfanatic~ (Mar 14, 2009)

>.< Harsh....

but I still don't see why being bi/gay is such a big deal...I mean..hell I'm bi
my friends were like "oh snap..no shit man?....cool"

but my Mom was like "Oh hell no! , don't you let your father know...he'll do things to *glares*"

another reason why life sucks


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## Jonnaius (Mar 14, 2009)

Basically, what we can glean from peoples experiences is this....

Dont tell your family until you're living away from them, and can support yourself. That way, they can block you out and it wont matter as much.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 14, 2009)

It's a joke that we have to go through this! I mean there's no closet for being straight everyone expects you to be born and find an opposite sex partner! Parents don't think "Oh I might have a gay, or soon to be gay, baby!" I feel oppressed by my parents, as it is, by being a computer geek, because I'm supposed to grow up to work on motor cycles, like boobs, and play sports!


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## Cronus616 (Mar 14, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> It's a joke that we have to go through this! I mean there's no closet for being straight everyone expects you to be born and find an opposite sex partner! Parents don't think "Oh I might have a gay, or soon to be gay, baby!" I feel oppressed by my parents, as it is, by being a computer geek, because I'm supposed to grow up to work on motor cycles, like boobs, and play sports!



and im supposed to be a good little christian boy >.>
and im not supposed to like animals >.>
or be gay.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 14, 2009)

Cronus616 said:


> and im supposed to be a good little christian boy >.>
> and im not supposed to like animals >.>
> or be gay.


Exactly! It gets old! In some countries, Scandinavian countries in particular, I hear it's no big deal, people are a lot more excepting. (At least that's what I heard) :twisted: I'm gay I'm the devil feeeaarrr me!!!


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## fureedomfighter (Mar 15, 2009)

Hey everyone, dunno if posting my story will help, but sometimes it's good to know that at least someone out there will hear me out. Lets see, I was probably 15 when I noticed an attraction to boys both physically and emotionally. I had a boyfriend that I met online for about a year. We met IRL about 3 times I think, handed my V-card over to him. It was weird, girls at school were attracted to me, this one girl had her heart set one me. I really let her down tho, initially I just told her I was gay, but it was really because she had this emotional complex that a hug just can't fix, yunno? About a year after that I kinda realized that I could go both ways, I'm bisexual (with a tendency towards boys). I was at a party with that same girl and this other girl, I made out with the other girl. It really hurt the first girl and I feel terrible about it still, and it was 6 months ago. She doesn't believe that I'm bisexual, she just thinks I'm a jerk. None of my "guy friends" have any idea of my sexuality. My parents don't know either, but they could get over it, they would rather I quit smoking lol. I think I just really need a male lover right now, somehow I feel like that would make everything alright. But I hate long distance stuff. Where are my Chi-town boys??lol ... It's wierd, do any of you ever look at yourself and think, "Is that REALLY me, .. how can I be gay?!?.. thats NOT me, but it feels so right..." yunno? Any thoughts on my situation are greatly appreciated, thank you <3


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 15, 2009)

Yeah I stare at myself in the mirror and can't stop thinking that I'm the way I am. It's hard to imagine myself gay, but still feels right. 
BTW I'm looking for a handsome New Mexifur about my age I'm 17!


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## Kurama17 (Mar 18, 2009)

Forest, whatever you decide to do, I hope you actually wanna do it. Trust me, I came out to the wrong side of my family, and it turned out horrible. I've been contemplating on telling my mom, since she has no problems with homosexuals, but I still don't know what the outcome would be. If you feel up for a talk or a bit of advice, since I've been trying that, hit me up anywhere.


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## CrispSkittlez (Mar 19, 2009)

I have a problem in the fact that I don't know what sexual preference I am.
I can't recall having feelings for anybody as long as I can remember, so I've very confused.
I'm in the tenth grade, so I've gotten used to sayings of, "This person's a fag." or, "That's gay." and I have no idea what to do to help myself understand.


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## bearetic (Mar 19, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I have a problem in the fact that I don't know what sexual preference I am.
> I can't recall having feelings for anybody as long as I can remember, so I've very confused.
> I'm in the tenth grade, so I've gotten used to sayings of, "This person's a fag." or, "That's gay." and I have no idea what to do to help myself understand.



It's possible you're asexual.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 19, 2009)

I thought I was asexual in the ever famous "denial" stage...


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## TheDumbening (Mar 20, 2009)

I myself think I may be a closet bisexual, closet because I'm scared to openly come out about it with my friends and family.


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## pheonix (Mar 20, 2009)

well I haven't posted here yet so as you may already know I'm bi and a few people know this irl already.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 20, 2009)

You know I had no idea it'd be this rough until about 2 weeks ago. I even have my best friend asleep in my room, because he was staying the night. I had to resist temptations... HE WAS EVEN IN MY BED! He wouldn't understand if I came out to him, I'd have to lie and tell him that I'm not sexually interested in him, just so he wouldn't alienate me. But that's untrue, HE IS THE HOTTEST GUY IN MY SCHOOL! Smooth hair, very tall, he and I are on the Cross Country team together, he runs a lot better than me. His hair blows in the wind behind him... in those short shorts (our uniforms include short shorts.) All night with him sleeping with his head by my feet (he sleeps opposite ways of me), so close... but so far away. I couldn't do anything he's way to Christian.


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## Loken (Mar 20, 2009)

Most of my friends know I am bi now, I probably won't tell my parents unless I get into a relationship with a guy but until then why bother?


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 20, 2009)

I'm gay, not come out yet. I will once I get into college. My parents will accept it well, no doubt, but it would be awkward. Plus it would help to be more sure.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 20, 2009)

I'm bi, don't know if I'm completely gay or not.  At the moment if you ask me all guys are complete assholes {excepting present company of course }.  I know that I like girls, just not sure about guys, but last year I was having a lot of problems with it.  I didn't even know that girls could like other girls {I'm EXTREMELY sheltered, I know}, and started having feelings for my best friend.  It got so awkward around her I ended up losing her as a friend.  There was a boy I was really close to as well, and I told him what was going on.  He assured me he loved me no matter what, and I ended up falling for him as well.  And a couple months ago he goes "I don't want you around anymore."  So I kinda ended up completely alone, since my other friends ditched me when they found out I liked one of them.  And when I tried to ask that boy why he dumped me as well he ordered me to go kill myself.  I am now comfortable with being bi, and a couple of times have had someone ask me if I am, and answered loud enough that the whole class looked around.  I think the worst reaction I've ever got was a "What the fuck is wrong with you?  Go to hell you freak!!"  However, I've also gotten a "oh, well....I'm kinda...bi too...um...you're pretty cute."  From a really hot girl, so my suggestion to those thinking about coming out, is to tell someone you know is also like that first.  Often they have good advice and will be very supportive, especially in scary things like coming out to parents.
 I do have problems now, but that's just mostly with being afraid to get close to anyone again.  But I do know how hard it is to be wondering whether or not you are gay/bi or not, so feel free to message me for advice or just to rant 
PS.  Sorry for the rant on this thread.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 20, 2009)

Oh god later in the day from my previous post! I woke my friend up and he wasn't wearing a shirt... How do I interpret this?


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 20, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Oh god later in the day from my previous post! I woke my friend up and he wasn't wearing a shirt... How do I interpret this?



I'm sorry, but all I can say is DON'T assume anything.  That doesn't go over well.  
I'm guessing you've already done this, but try to bring up the subject not in relation to yourself, to judge his reaction.  He may surprise you.  A lot of people I know are very serious Christians and don't have any problems with me.
I had the girl I secretly liked take my swimsuit off once, it's hard when the person has no idea what their doing to you.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 20, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> I'm sorry, but all I can say is DON'T assume anything.  That doesn't go over well.
> I'm guessing you've already done this, but try to bring up the subject not in relation to yourself, to judge his reaction.  He may surprise you.  A lot of people I know are very serious Christians and don't have any problems with me.
> I had the girl I secretly liked take my swimsuit off once, it's hard when the person has no idea what their doing to you.


It's funny, because he's been my best friend since freshman year in High School. It's not til recently that I've had feelings for him. We were playing Left 4 Dead and another guy was playing, and we were having trouble getting done with a part. The other guy said I don't know how, but my boyfriend can do it. My friend didn't react at all I was shocked! I'm still worried if my friend knew that the guy sleeping in the same bed as him was gay. I don't think he'd go over it so well.


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## PriestRevan (Mar 20, 2009)

Loken said:


> Most of my friends know I am bi now, I probably won't tell my parents unless I get into a relationship with a guy but until then why bother?


 
^this.

Why don't people do this more often?


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 20, 2009)

The thing is, you have to tell them sooner or later, but I'm not bi... I'm just gay. So any future relationships will probably not be with a woman.


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## PriestRevan (Mar 20, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> The thing is, you have to tell them sooner or later, but I'm not bi... I'm just gay. So any future relationships will probably not be with a woman.


 
What I don't understand is why faggots just can't wait? Jesus. At least get out of the house before you people tell your parents.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 20, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> What I don't understand is why faggots just can't wait? Jesus. At least get out of the house before you people tell your parents.


Oh well of course that... nvm... please do have to say faggot? I'm sorry I find it offensive no matter who's mouth or typing fingers it comes out of.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 21, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> It's funny, because he's been my best friend since freshman year in High School. It's not til recently that I've had feelings for him. We were playing Left 4 Dead and another guy was playing, and we were having trouble getting done with a part. The other guy said I don't know how, but my boyfriend can do it. My friend didn't react at all I was shocked! I'm still worried if my friend knew that the guy sleeping in the same bed as him was gay. I don't think he'd go over it so well.



It kinda comes down to whether or not you really want him to know.  I think if you've been friends since freshman year he probably wont abandon you.  He may need time to think it over, to get back to seeing you the same way, but the lack of reaction seems promising.  
Or you can just enjoy the crush in private.  I know I found that hard, really wanted this girl to know how I felt, but in retrospect I shouldn't have said anything to her.  She used me in an attempt to make a boy jealous {backfired on her, he was jealous of her, not me.}  This boy sounds like he wouldn't do that, this girl was always a real bitch, but I was always willing to see past that because she could be sweet on those rare occasions she felt like it.


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## PriestRevan (Mar 21, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Oh well of course that... nvm... please do have to say faggot? I'm sorry I find it offensive no matter who's mouth or typing fingers it comes out of.


 
I always say it.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 21, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> I always say it.



I don't care, it's rude.  Please refrain, at least on this particular thread


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 21, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> It kinda comes down to whether or not you really want him to know.  I think if you've been friends since freshman year he probably wont abandon you.  He may need time to think it over, to get back to seeing you the same way, but the lack of reaction seems promising.
> Or you can just enjoy the crush in private.  I know I found that hard, really wanted this girl to know how I felt, but in retrospect I shouldn't have said anything to her.  She used me in an attempt to make a boy jealous {backfired on her, he was jealous of her, not me.}  This boy sounds like he wouldn't do that, this girl was always a real bitch, but I was always willing to see past that because she could be sweet on those rare occasions she felt like it.


Yeah my friend is a drummer, so inevitably drummer-like. Forgetful, blank minded, but still very nice. He's my lovable oaf! He has a good attitude, and he's considerate.


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## PriestRevan (Mar 21, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> I don't care, it's rude. Please refrain, at least on this particular thread


 
Whatever dude.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 21, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Yeah my friend is a drummer, so inevitably drummer-like. Forgetful, blank minded, but still very nice. He's my lovable oaf! He has a good attitude, and he's considerate.



He sounds sweet ^.^  I wish you luck.


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## FurryFox (Mar 21, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> You know I had no idea it'd be this rough until about 2 weeks ago. I even have my best friend asleep in my room, because he was staying the night. I had to resist temptations... HE WAS EVEN IN MY BED! He wouldn't understand if I came out to him, I'd have to lie and tell him that I'm not sexually interested in him, just so he wouldn't alienate me. But that's untrue, HE IS THE HOTTEST GUY IN MY SCHOOL! Smooth hair, very tall, he and I are on the Cross Country team together, he runs a lot better than me. His hair blows in the wind behind him... in those short shorts (our uniforms include short shorts.) All night with him sleeping with his head by my feet (he sleeps opposite ways of me), so close... but so far away. I couldn't do anything he's way to Christian.



 I've seriously got an extremely similar problem here =P , cept I've known him since 1st grade, started havin feelings for him when I was 12 .... I guess I waited way too long to tell him since he's got a girlfriend, ah well, all I can do now is support his decision at least =P ... I owe him that for being his best friend for 10 years ...


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 21, 2009)

FurryFox said:


> I've seriously got an extremely similar problem here =P , cept I've known him since 1st grade, started havin feelings for him when I was 12 .... I guess I waited way too long to tell him since he's got a girlfriend, ah well, all I can do now is support his decision at least =P ... I owe him that for being his best friend for 10 years ...



I think you may owe him the truth since you've been friends that long...but good for you for supporting him anyway ^.^


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 21, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> He sounds sweet ^.^  I wish you luck.


He is that's the biggest thing that get's me... I think I'll tell him first, thanks you've been a great inspiration!


FurryFox said:


> I've seriously got an extremely similar problem here =P , cept I've known him since 1st grade, started havin feelings for him when I was 12 .... I guess I waited way too long to tell him since he's got a girlfriend, ah well, all I can do now is support his decision at least =P ... I owe him that for being his best friend for 10 years ...


Well I don't plan on telling him I have feelings for him I only want to tell of my sexual orientation. Just, because I need to get it out, it hurts, and I don't know why... I just need to tell someone I know.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 21, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Well I don't plan on telling him I have feelings for him I only want to tell of my sexual orientation. Just, because I need to get it out, it hurts, and I don't know why... I just need to tell someone I know.



I know the feeling...It is amazing how much better you feel after telling just one person, especially if that person accepts you.


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## FurryFox (Mar 21, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> I think you may owe him the truth since you've been friends that long...but good for you for supporting him anyway ^.^



Yah, you may be right about that ... I'll have to think of exactly the right way to tell him =3


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 21, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> It's funny, because he's been my best friend since freshman year in High School. It's not til recently that I've had feelings for him. We were playing Left 4 Dead and another guy was playing, and we were having trouble getting done with a part. The other guy said I don't know how, but my boyfriend can do it. My friend didn't react at all I was shocked! I'm still worried if my friend knew that the guy sleeping in the same bed as him was gay. I don't think he'd go over it so well.



Dude if he's sleeping in your bed there is also a chance he is gay or at least bi too. OF course, don't jump to any conclusions, but there is a chance.

Also, try putting him in a situation where he has to show his opinions about homosexuality, like the L4D game but more direct. He could just have not said anything to be polite, but still have deep feeling against homosexuality. Try making a seemingly-offhand comment about the gay marriage movement and judge his reaction or something.

Meh, hope it helps. Good luck.

The way I deal with friends and being closeted and stuff, is, well, not having friends :/. I am friendly with quite a few people at school (and have friends online), but I put a wall between me and them so that we don't get too close. Its kind of a bummer because I want to break this wall but I don't think I will be able to until college. I'm basically just a wimp for not coming out yet, because my parents are very liberal and tolerant (they went to one of the protests against Prop 8 after it passed), and my school is the same, so there is really no reason not to come out except for cowardice. :/


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 21, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Dude if he's sleeping in your bed there is also a chance he is gay or at least bi too. OF course, don't jump to any conclusions, but there is a chance.
> 
> Also, try putting him in a situation where he has to show his opinions about homosexuality, like the L4D game but more direct. He could just have not said anything to be polite, but still have deep feeling against homosexuality. Try making a seemingly-offhand comment about the gay marriage movement and judge his reaction or something.
> 
> ...


We were in a debate class and he has the same opinion as me on gay marriage... it doesn't matter. Two men or two women should have the same rights as a man and woman. So yeah I think it'll be safe to come out to him. The only predicament is he's in a relationship, with a girl in the class below us. I'm also upset because he's going somewhere else for college. I'm going to NMSU and he's going to Texas Tech. When we graduate he's probably the only person I'd miss. I'll visit him as much as possible of course. The next time I see him I'll tell him, wish me luck, I hope he and I can still be friends.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 22, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> We were in a debate class and he has the same opinion as me on gay marriage... it doesn't matter. Two men or two women should have the same rights as a man and woman. So yeah I think it'll be safe to come out to him. The only predicament is he's in a relationship, with a girl in the class below us. I'm also upset because he's going somewhere else for college. I'm going to NMSU and he's going to Texas Tech. When we graduate he's probably the only person I'd miss. I'll visit him as much as possible of course. The next time I see him I'll tell him, wish me luck, I hope he and I can still be friends.



Let us know how it goes ^.^


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## bearetic (Mar 22, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> I know the feeling...It is amazing how much better you feel after telling just one person, especially if that person accepts you.



Hell yeah.



Bunneh45 said:


> The way I deal with friends and being closeted and stuff, is, well, not having friends :/. I am friendly with quite a few people at school (and have friends online), but I put a wall between me and them so that we don't get too close. Its kind of a bummer because I want to break this wall but I don't think I will be able to until college. I'm basically just a wimp for not coming out yet, because my parents are very liberal and tolerant (they went to one of the protests against Prop 8 after it passed), and my school is the same, so there is really no reason not to come out except for cowardice. :/



DO IT

***

I've had a great freedom coming out about my atheism (first senior year in college). I can be myself and I'm not afraid (though I'm taking it easy with my parents, mom especially). I'm free. So, one good coming out experience will lead to what I hope will be another. There will be a few bumps, but nothing too serious hopefully.

The worst I feel could happen is losing a few friends, losing my job, getting kicked out of the house, and in distant last place, a gay basher beating my skull in. SO... I might be taking it slower with gay than with atheism. But if I'm smart, I think I'll be OK. Plus, things tend to turn out better than I fear. I'm guessing the worst that will actually happen is I might lose a couple friends. But this one guy I'm pretty sure this will happen with, I haven't talked to much lately, so it doesn't matter too much.

Which brings me to a question. What do people think is worse? Nonbelief or homosexuality? I'm talking about the type of people who would have a problem with one or both in the first place. Mainly, I'm thinking conservative Christians who'd have a problem with both. I'm not really afraid, just trying to gague things.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 23, 2009)

I chickened out!!! And it hurts more than ever!!!


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## bearetic (Mar 23, 2009)

If it makes it easier, maybe you should shoot him an email if you really want to tell him you're gay. Just click and don't think about it. Maybe you'll want to keep it simple. Maybe not.

If this is the first person you've told, it's going to be hard. After that, if it goes well, it should be easier to tell others.

That's just one way to do it. Whatever works for you.

Also, consider if you want to tell him at all. I'm sure you do. You've got to come out some time to someone.

Whatever you do, I hope it all goes well. It's up to you. No pressure.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 23, 2009)

character said:


> If it makes it easier, maybe you should shoot him an email if you really want to tell him you're gay. Just click and don't think about it. Maybe you'll want to keep it simple. Maybe not.
> 
> If this is the first person you've told, it's going to be hard. After that, if it goes well, it should be easier to tell others.
> 
> ...


Okay I'm texting him as we speak!


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 24, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Okay I'm texting him as we speak!



Personally I can't hit the "send" button without thinking, I'm more able to blurt it out to the person's face.  But whatever works...good luck


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## bearetic (Mar 24, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> Personally I can't hit the "send" button without thinking, I'm more able to blurt it out to the person's face.  But whatever works...good luck



Haha, different strokes.



ForestFox91 said:


> Okay I'm texting him as we speak!



Hope it went well!


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 24, 2009)

Oh lord I hit the send button and I shuddered letting out a lagato "oh!" with intense vibrato! (music geek ftw)
He never responded... I went to school today he didn't treat me any differently, nor say anything about it. It made me wonder if he got it or not. He was sure bending over in front of me a lot! Probably by accident, because I don't want to come in between him and his girlfriend!!! So I considered just wait, I'll invite him over some time for the night, ask him to sleep downstairs, and explain to him why. I got the guts to hit THE FRIGGIN' SEND BUTTON!!! This shouldn't be any harder.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 24, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Oh lord I hit the send button and I shuddered letting out a lagato "oh!" with intense vibrato! (music geek ftw)
> He never responded... I went to school today he didn't treat me any differently, nor say anything about it. It made me wonder if he got it or not. He was sure bending over in front of me a lot! Probably by accident, because I don't want to come in between him and his girlfriend!!! So I considered just wait, I'll invite him over some time for the night, ask him to sleep downstairs, and explain to him why. I got the guts to hit THE FRIGGIN' SEND BUTTON!!! This shouldn't be any harder.


  It gets easier after that first person, especially if they react well.  He may be wanting to pretend it's a joke, so be prepared...
When I told that girl, I said "MJ, I'm bi.  I like a girl."
MJ: "OMG, it's that eighth grader Kim, right???"
Me:  "Um, no....I kinda...like you..."
MJ:  "Ha, very funny joke.  Now c'mon, it's Kim right?"

-.-

Anyway, after that first conversation it's much easier...


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## bearetic (Mar 25, 2009)

SUSPENSE!


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 25, 2009)

I'll search for opportunities, I'm good at that... from what I see should be about 2 weeks-3 months til I tell him. I know... vague, as time draws nearer I'll get a clearer picture. I don't want to push my self either; only when the opportunity comes. Plus pushing that send button made me feel more free, whether he read it or not. Just the fact that I got that courage!


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## bearetic (Mar 25, 2009)




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## ForestFox91 (Mar 25, 2009)

character said:


>


Gah! What are you happy about? Say something! Say something before I beat my bloody head on the keyboard!


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 25, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Gah! What are you happy about? Say something! Say something before I beat my bloody head on the keyboard!



My guess is he's happy for you, getting the courage up to hit send


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## Ty Vulpine (Mar 25, 2009)

I came out to my mom and oldest sister over the weekend. My mom accepted it, not sure about my sister. She didn't say anything.


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 25, 2009)

I'm such a bad liar (or side-stepper I guess because I doubt I would want to lie about this), so it will probably come out way before I want it to. Its just a matter of time...


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## QuetzaDrake (Mar 26, 2009)

When I came out to my mom about having a boyfriend, she was speechless with mouth agape for 5 minutes before I was assaulted by awkward questions for another 15. @_@ She accepted it though (called him my "special friend" when I had him).

Dad still doesn't know. >3>


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 26, 2009)

QuetzaDrake said:


> When I came out to my mom about having a boyfriend, she was speechless with mouth agape for 5 minutes before I was assaulted by awkward questions for another 15. @_@ She accepted it though (called him my "special friend" when I had him).
> 
> Dad still doesn't know. >3>


Oh I'm a big fan of your comic! I'm slightly afraid, either my mom would alienate me, or just be very awkward about it... I'm not rushing about telling my family. I just want to tell my friends, at least.


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## Ty Vulpine (Mar 26, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Oh I'm a big fan of your comic!



Yes, Furthia High is good :3


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## Takun (Mar 26, 2009)

QuetzaDrake said:


> When I came out to my mom about having a boyfriend, she was speechless with mouth agape for 5 minutes before I was assaulted by awkward questions for another 15. @_@ She accepted it though (called him my "special friend" when I had him).
> 
> Dad still doesn't know. >3>




Awkward like ones I got?

"Do you lock your computer so we wouldn't find your gay porn?"

"Have you had sex yet?  Kissed a guy?"

"Were you ever molested?"

worst one "Are you sure?  How long have you known."

>.<

That's over now.  Wooooo


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## Endless Humiliation (Mar 26, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> "Were you ever molested?"



I got that one. When I looked back I wondered if I should have felt offended or not.


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## Takun (Mar 26, 2009)

Load_Blown said:


> I got that one. When I looked back I wondered if I should have felt offended or not.



I know right?

I was like.......  no?   Should I have been? @_@


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 26, 2009)

I don't want my parents to know at all! But how to keep it secret is impossible!


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## Sam (Mar 26, 2009)

I came out of the closet to nÃºmero uno. Me. I'm not telling a soul. My Mom suspects something, I'm sure. She already know she knows I'm a furry. But being gay?!?!? Oh no. I'd just die. 

I don't really have an issue of coming out, it's more of an issue of not letting my Mother not know. She doesn't really need to know.

That and I have two other brothers, one is a body builder, and the other just likes to have his little girl and live his life. Both of them attract girls and one has a kid, so not having grandkids can't be a complaint. Plus both of them were the popular people in school. : / I'm just average.


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## bearetic (Mar 26, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> My guess is he's happy for you, getting the courage up to hit send


Yep


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 26, 2009)

character said:


> Yep


Thanks! I just wish he would've seen it! So now I have to build up that courage again!  Oh well... Just as long he's the first one to find out. I don't know why, but I've set my mind on him knowing first. It's probably because I'm attracted to him . Whatever just as long as it's him...


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## Sam (Mar 26, 2009)

Get it. 

There are plenty of fish in the sea, but if you want just one, you had better hope he sees your bait first.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 26, 2009)

Sam said:


> Get it.
> 
> There are plenty of fish in the sea, but if you want just one, you had better hope he sees your bait first.


That's what I plan on... if he's bi. He has a girlfriend currently. So most likely, bi-sexual... or even more so: straight. I just hope he'll understand... bah! what am I worried about, of course he will! We've been friends for far too long for it to stop! I hope he's bi, but if not... just as long as he understands.


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## Sam (Mar 26, 2009)

Nah, most people are pretty open minded. :3

You should be good.

Just don't mention it after something that could be considered a date. Blargh.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 26, 2009)

Sam said:


> Nah, most people are pretty open minded. :3
> 
> You should be good.
> 
> Just don't mention it after something that could be considered a date. Blargh.


Oh lord no! 

He usually comes to my house on the weekends, and I'll get a bed downstairs ready and explain to him why I don't want him to sleep in my bed with me... even though I'd more than love to have him in my bed... I just don't want things to get weird...


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## Sam (Mar 26, 2009)

Well I lono. Why don't you tell him outright. Then see where he sleeps ;P 


Jk jk. 

Go with your plan.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 26, 2009)

Glad you think it's a good idea!


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 26, 2009)

Good luck with that


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## QuetzaDrake (Mar 27, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Awkward like ones I got?
> 
> "Do you lock your computer so we wouldn't find your gay porn?"
> 
> ...



I believe I win with something along the lines of, "What if you don't like it?... You know... a pee-pee in your butt?"


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## Endless Humiliation (Mar 27, 2009)

QuetzaDrake said:


> I believe I win with something along the lines of, "What if you don't like it?... You know... a pee-pee in your butt?"



AHAHAHAHA What kind of question is that? Was "pee-pee" actually what they said?


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## Takun (Mar 27, 2009)

QuetzaDrake said:


> I believe I win with something along the lines of, "What if you don't like it?... You know... a pee-pee in your butt?"




Haha...ouch.

I did get told "Well now I know why you didn't want to play college football anymore..."

>>


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## Endless Humiliation (Mar 27, 2009)

real talk college football probably gets a lot gayer than any college gay club


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## QuetzaDrake (Mar 27, 2009)

I'm pretty sure the word "pee-pee" was involved. My mother is a very... special woman when it comes to that. ~_~


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 27, 2009)

QuetzaDrake said:


> I'm pretty sure the word "pee-pee" was involved. My mother is a very... special woman when it comes to that. ~_~


ugh that sounds like something my mom would say... exactly why I don't plan on coming out to my parents any time soon.

On a lighter note:
My friend is coming over tonight, and I feel really courageous! I plan on coming out to him, the first person ever IRL.
But I'm angry 'cause I went to the school library today, to pick up White Fang by Jack London, and it ended up being the abridged version for Special Ed. students! Gah!!!


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## LoinRockerForever (Mar 28, 2009)

Blah, I am bi but I look like a straight guy. So when I let people know like, " Yeah I am bi " they always give me that look like " wow didn't know "

So, when I came out like 2 years ago, people were surprised, anyone else get that reaction?


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## alicewater (Mar 28, 2009)

Well happy day all around. My Boyfriend just admitted to being Bi as I have suspected he was. And on the otherside since he confessed and was honest I did so too and admitted too being at this stage borderline Bi.

This has turned into a way more intersting relationship then I thought it was going to be.


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 28, 2009)

Lol so my sister has caused some drama dating some crazy boyfriend, and my mom was talking to me about how I shouldn't date someone just because they are crazy, and she was clearly trying to be gender neutral. She was using "it" as a pronoun but trying to hide it. Pretty funny. I am almost sure they already know Dx



> On a lighter note:
> My friend is coming over tonight, and I feel really courageous! I plan on coming out to him, the first person ever IRL.


HOW DID IT GO?


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 28, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> HOW DID IT GO?


I lost it, I couldn't tell him... I had opportunities, but my mouth couldn't utter those words. My mind, became a cage getting tighter and tighter. I wanted to stop the terrible dreams I've been having, I know the dreams are there, because I can't get the courage to be able to say it again. I'm a coward... I dropped him off at his house, and cried the way back home. I pulled over and cried my tears, it took me an hour to calm down. I hardly even cried when my last grandparent died away. I got home, my parents were worried, my friend only lives 2 minutes away. I told them nothing... they can't know, I don't want them to, they didn't ask too many questions, thank god, I couldn't come up with excuses. Why? This isn't fun, no person deserves this. Am I only alive to be ashamed of myself?


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 28, 2009)

Don't be ashamed of yourself. I have enormous respect for how far you have gotten. You are very courageous for just having the intent to tell your friend, even if you didn't follow through. I doubt I would be able to the first time, too. I haven't been able to gather the courage to do what you have done at all. _I'm_ the coward, not you. I am sure you can do this.


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## bearetic (Mar 28, 2009)

It took a lot of time for me to accept my homosexuality (last year, after I quit being Christian) and then to start coming out in any real way (earlier this month). I'm 22 and am just now coming out. It's got to be rough for you, being 17 or 18. You WILL get there eventually.

Hang in there, don't hang yourself, lol.


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## Revy (Mar 28, 2009)

Heh, even tho I'm new here I don't mind saying I'm gay, realised it when I was much younger and just took to it, I didn't really feel shame till I heard words such a fag and homo being thrown around in middle/high, but I still hadnt came out but I _had_ a wonderful boyfriend all those years, I recently came out to my friends but I doubt my family knows, they think I'm dating some girl from high school in a lie I told them -_-

I still live day to day wondering if I should tell everyone or not, noone else irl knows this ._. and its really hard to try and tell them...Also Im in the military and it seems to be double hard to find another partner since my bf died some 7 months ago. shits a real pain.


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## xXWidowerXx (Mar 29, 2009)

Wow, no wonder this is a popular thread.

I don't know where I stand. I can't say I'm bi or gay, because well... In real life, I'm only attracted to females in an emotional/relationship sense... except my best friend, but I'm worried I might just be confusing the idea of a best friend with something else, something he's not supposed to be.

As far as furry goes, I'm far more attracted to gay stuff. But irl I don't like gay porn... just the furry stuff... and I'm in no way attracted to real animals.

I'm just afriad my mind might be messed up from a messed up childhood, but I've never felt so lonely as the day I realized I wish I could be with my best friend in that way ):


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 29, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Don't be ashamed of yourself. I have enormous respect for how far you have gotten. You are very courageous for just having the intent to tell your friend, even if you didn't follow through. I doubt I would be able to the first time, too. I haven't been able to gather the courage to do what you have done at all. _I'm_ the coward, not you. I am sure you can do this.



If I'm not to blame for not following through, you shouldn't blame yourself. I have a feeling it takes f'ing guts to even accept yourself, let alone the ability to come out.



character said:


> It took a lot of time for me to accept my homosexuality (last year, after I quit being Christian) and then to start coming out in any real way (earlier this month). I'm 22 and am just now coming out. It's got to be rough for you, being 17 or 18. You WILL get there eventually.
> 
> Hang in there, don't hang yourself, lol.



Thanks, yeah I realized about a month ago, but since I was 14 I've had an attraction towards men, but I couldn't seem to accept until last month.



xXWidowerXx said:


> Wow, no wonder this is a popular thread.
> 
> I don't know where I stand. I can't say I'm bi or gay, because well... In real life, I'm only attracted to females in an emotional/relationship sense... except my best friend, but I'm worried I might just be confusing the idea of a best friend with something else, something he's not supposed to be.
> 
> ...



I thought the same for awhile. Yeah I'm attracted to my best friend, and have been for about 2 years. I remember last year we couldn't get dates to the homecoming dance, so we thought we'd make a joke of it and go together. XD my sophomore year was great. 
... and yeah you just have a homosexual-anthropomorphic fetish.

I've come to realize the reason I am gay is because I can't stand living with women. I have three older sisters (all out of the house), that weren't the nicest people, that were just a bunch of harlots. And my mom's a psycho!! (get's mad easily, blames me and my dad for stupid shit, and beats her head against a wall if she doesn't get her way... kind of childish...)


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 29, 2009)

Revy said:


> Heh, even tho I'm new here I don't mind saying I'm gay, realised it when I was much younger and just took to it, I didn't really feel shame till I heard words such a fag and homo being thrown around in middle/high, but I still hadnt came out but I _had_ a wonderful boyfriend all those years, I recently came out to my friends but I doubt my family knows, they think I'm dating some girl from high school in a lie I told them -_-
> 
> I still live day to day wondering if I should tell everyone or not, noone else irl knows this ._. and its really hard to try and tell them...Also Im in the military and it seems to be double hard to find another partner since my bf died some 7 months ago. shits a real pain.


That makes me sad... I'm truly sorry. I don't know what I'd do if I lost one I had fallen in love with.


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## xXWidowerXx (Mar 29, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> I thought the same for awhile. Yeah I'm attracted to my best friend, and have been for about 2 years. I remember last year we couldn't get dates to the homecoming dance, so we thought we'd make a joke of it and go together. XD my sophomore year was great.
> ... and yeah you just have a homosexual-anthropomorphic fetish.
> 
> I've come to realize the reason I am gay is because I can't stand living with women. I have three older sisters (all out of the house), that weren't the nicest people, that were just a bunch of harlots. And my mom's a psycho!! (get's mad easily, blames me and my dad for stupid shit, and beats her head against a wall if she doesn't get her way... kind of childish...)


 
That sucks about your mother D:
I had an insane mother, but she was gone from the time I was like 10. And I have 3 sisters too which is weird o.o

I don't know. This is the first time I've ever said something. But I can't tell anyone.. and I mean, if I told my best friend he'd hate me forever. Plus I just don't want to do that to him.. he's gonna be joining the military very soon and everything... it just sucks. ):

Here's to dying alone >>


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 29, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> That sucks about your mother D:
> I had an insane mother, but she was gone from the time I was like 10. And I have 3 sisters too which is weird o.o
> 
> I don't know. This is the first time I've ever said something. But I can't tell anyone.. and I mean, if I told my best friend he'd hate me forever. Plus I just don't want to do that to him.. he's gonna be joining the military very soon and everything... it just sucks. ):
> ...


No... I'm not dying alone! I refuse! It takes time and I'm willing to wait now! You shouldn't give up either! It's too easy to give up! My whole life is based off challenges, that's how we become better people!


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## Kurama17 (Mar 29, 2009)

Wow, missed a lot here >_>

Anyway, anyone needs to talk or needs advice, or can actually give advice, let me know, I'm kinda stuck in a rough spot right now :|


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 29, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Wow, missed a lot here >_>
> 
> Anyway, anyone needs to talk or needs advice, or can actually give advice, let me know, I'm kinda stuck in a rough spot right now :|


I'm sorry... I'm in a rough spot as well...


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 29, 2009)

Bleh my black internet friend was racially assaulted the other day, so now I'm even more afraid of coming out. Not helping D:

I am starting to think that waiting to college might be too long of a wait, though. I guess reading Furpiled helped. I don't know...

Although I haven't had any experience with coming out, yet (obviously), I would be happy to offer advice/support.



xXWidowerXx said:


> As far as furry goes, I'm far more attracted to gay stuff. But irl I don't like gay porn... just the furry stuff... and I'm in no way attracted to real animals.



Well, I'm the same way. I like gay furry but don't like gay porn. The kind of men that is popularized by the gay porn isn't attractive to me, but there are tons of different kinds of men just like there are tons of different types of women. I am still kind of confused about it, though, too. The type of gay guys in the porn are either too feminine or way too masculine. I am attracted to the more boyish guys, which is kind of how most male furries are drawn for some reason.

Don't think you are alone in thinking this way, though. I hear this from so many furries its surprising.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 29, 2009)

I don't like gay porn either, even if gay furry porn is hot to me. I'm not confused at all really, I know I'm gay. I've seen and met some guys that are attractive. And I find that gay porn, some of the stuff they do is just terrible. I'm not exactly gay for sex, just I prefer the presence of men. Men are warmer anywaysX3! And furry porn seems to give more personality, fursonas capture personality, regular porn is just a bunch of people with no real individuality.


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## Revy (Mar 29, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> That makes me sad... I'm truly sorry. I don't know what I'd do if I lost one I had fallen in love with.


 First thoughts to mind are /suicide since dreams are crushed. But I got over that since its not worth it, or making your family and friends worry.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 29, 2009)

Revy said:


> First thoughts to mind are /suicide since dreams are crushed. But I got over that since its not worth it, or making your family and friends worry.


That's really sad. D: 

Although I do try to distance myself from my family, they are upsetting, and they are the worst thing to come home to after a hard day. My mom tries to make me clean things that are already clean, my dad tells me be more manly, instead of sitting at my computer, and my sister comes home crying because her fiance was drunk... again. I cling to my friends all the time! I don't know what I'd do without them. I'd probably go mad, my friends and I all have problems at home. We keep each other from depression.


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## Revy (Mar 29, 2009)

Heh atleast you have friends that you can go to and can understand you, I can understand that computer thing, my grandad always got mad at me cause I was on it so much.

Hell my "friends" were prolly nothing more to me outside of school maybe except for once that I still talk to thats a senior.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 29, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> That's really sad. D:
> 
> Although I do try to distance myself from my family, they are upsetting, and they are the worst thing to come home to after a hard day. My mom tries to make me clean things that are already clean, my dad tells me be more manly, instead of sitting at my computer, and my sister comes home crying because her fiance was drunk... again. I cling to my friends all the time! I don't know what I'd do without them. I'd probably go mad, my friends and I all have problems at home. We keep each other from depression.



*hugs*   I have the opposite problem...I lost my one close friend, the single one who accepted me, or so I thought...So for the last few months honestly the only thing keeping me alive has been my parents.  One, they accept me for who I am, and two, I know it would hurt them if I did anything to my self.  My decision:  High schoolers are scum, and I don't really need them.  Does prove a rather hard decision to follow...You're lucky you fave friends to depend on.
And good luck with that boy, just got back from a three day vacation with no internet and saw that story, I'm sorry.


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## Lost~Koneko (Mar 29, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Awkward like ones I got?
> 
> "Do you lock your computer so we wouldn't find your gay porn?"
> 
> ...



My personal favorite was the "You know, there's a stereotype that gay people molest little kids, so I don't want you to feel......pressured or anything......"
Thanks, mom, I was planning on going and molesting so little girl down the street, but guess I don't have to -.-


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## xXWidowerXx (Mar 29, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> And furry porn seems to give more personality, fursonas capture personality, regular porn is just a bunch of people with no real individuality.


 
I agree completely. There's love in that artwork :3



Bunneh45 said:


> Don't think you are alone in thinking this way, though. I hear this from so many furries its surprising.


 
Thanks for the support  It's good to know I'm not alone in all this


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## bearetic (Mar 30, 2009)

Revy said:


> Also Im in the military and it seems to be double hard to find another partner since my bf died some 7 months ago. shits a real pain.



I hope you heal well and find another partner in time.



Lost~Koneko said:


> My personal favorite was the "You know, there's a stereotype that gay people molest little kids, so I don't want you to feel......pressured or anything......"
> Thanks, mom, I was planning on going and molesting so little girl down the street, but guess I don't have to -.-



lol homophobic misinformation...

"Gay men rape each other!" I've been told, out of concern, by a family member. -_- So do straight people... geez.

That, and DENIAL DENIAL DENIAL from all of them: "you're not gay, I know it." (and how would you know...?)

'scuse me while I go study... http://web.morons.org/feature/marriage.jsp

Any literature or other resources that have been of help to you guys? (and possibly girls?)


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## Bunneh45 (Mar 30, 2009)

I don't really have a support system myself, unfortunately. I don't really have any friends at school (the day is really short and there are very few times to talk during school hours and I am too introverted to spend more time than that), and although my parents are very supportive, they are a bit too prying (they are putting computer monitoring software on my sister's computer because she has been going crazy lately -- not sure how that would help -- and they have also hinted at putting it on mine.. but why1?!?), and their hands are full trying to make my sister sane, so I'm kind of alone except for this thread and a few internet friends.

I'm scared of talking to my parents about any of my problems, even those unrelated to my being gay, because they will start to pry too much because they are a bit too overprotective (I am definitely not someone who throws that word around easily -- most parents are way too underprotective) and they feel that they have to be 100% into their child's life, so I have just been trying to make them think I am totally fine and forget about me, which is sort of easy right now because they are occupied with my sister.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 30, 2009)

Lost~Koneko said:


> *hugs*   I have the opposite problem...I lost my one close friend, the single one who accepted me, or so I thought...So for the last few months honestly the only thing keeping me alive has been my parents.  One, they accept me for who I am, and two, I know it would hurt them if I did anything to my self.  My decision:  High schoolers are scum, and I don't really need them.  Does prove a rather hard decision to follow...You're lucky you fave friends to depend on.
> And good luck with that boy, just got back from a three day vacation with no internet and saw that story, I'm sorry.



Well we all have and we all lack. There's something to everything, but it can't be it all. Wow >_> philosophical... But yeah, we all have issues in or outside of our homes



Bunneh45 said:


> I don't really have a support system myself, unfortunately. I don't really have any friends at school (the day is really short and there are very few times to talk during school hours and I am too introverted to spend more time than that), and although my parents are very supportive, they are a bit too prying (they are putting computer monitoring software on my sister's computer because she has been going crazy lately -- not sure how that would help -- and they have also hinted at putting it on mine.. but why1?!?), and their hands are full trying to make my sister sane, so I'm kind of alone except for this thread and a few internet friends.
> 
> I'm scared of talking to my parents about any of my problems, even those unrelated to my being gay, because they will start to pry too much because they are a bit too overprotective (I am definitely not someone who throws that word around easily -- most parents are way too underprotective) and they feel that they have to be 100% into their child's life, so I have just been trying to make them think I am totally fine and forget about me, which is sort of easy right now because they are occupied with my sister.


I'm sorry, you should tell them that you are mature enough to not have your mind "warped" in anyway. You are old enough to have a strong determined mind! That's what I told mine, plus I know how to purge all that parental monitoring crap! The people that make that software have to make it easy for parents to use, and we are a generation that knows more than they do! mwahahahahaa!!


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 30, 2009)

character said:


> I hope you heal well and find another partner in time.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Bah! That's a despicable link! That's the whole f***ing denial stage! I hated myself during the denial stage! I want to go back in time and stab my-denial-stage-self!


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## xXWidowerXx (Mar 30, 2009)

Is it normal to be really depressed since posting on here? ):
This is the first time I've really asked my self the question, and I still don't have an answer either way. All of yesterday and most of today I just felt really down. My friend though... lately he seems extra nice to me and I've been just kind of ignoring him and I feel bad about it. I haven't been my normal self because a lot of family stuff is going on too =/

How are you guys doing?


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 30, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> Is it normal to be really depressed since posting on here? ):
> This is the first time I've really asked my self the question, and I still don't have an answer either way. All of yesterday and most of today I just felt really down. My friend though... lately he seems extra nice to me and I've been just kind of ignoring him and I feel bad about it. I haven't been my normal self because a lot of family stuff is going on too =/
> 
> How are you guys doing?


Yeah it's normal to be depressed, but you'll get used to it. Your friend will be important to you, if they aren't already. I don't mean to be an ass, I'm just saying try to watch what you do to your friends. I'm actually content... trapped, but content... I've been having crazy ass dreams lately!


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## xXWidowerXx (Mar 30, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Yeah it's normal to be depressed, but you'll get used to it. Your friend will be important to you, if they aren't already. I don't mean to be an ass, I'm just saying try to watch what you do to your friends. I'm actually content... trapped, but content... I've been having crazy ass dreams lately!


 
Nah it's understandable. I feel like the couple of people I let close are all I have anyways.. in a way, I guess. And I'm not new to depression XD

Crazy dreams? Two nights in a row I've had some too. One of them, my friend I talks abouts, he has a boyfriend for some reason... but it's completely normal? But it's not me, so I'm jealous. Then I had a dream the next night he knocked a girl up. Wtf? o.o


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 30, 2009)

Three of my dreams:

I'm in an endless forest, and happy to be lost. Blissful, the trees sway without the sound of wind. I see the friend I have a crush on, ahead. He looks back, he looks afraid. He runs, and I chase after. I look behind me, but nothing. I'm confused as to what my friend is running from. I soon catch up, but only to find his dead body. I look at my hands, covered in blood, I wake up crying.

My second one is at my own funeral. I'm sitting there, sixth pew from the front, on the left side, next to the aisle. The preacher says things that are completely untrue about my life. I see my friend, he looks 5 years older, he's sitting in the front, right side, next to the aisle. His head down, he appeared to be crying, I've never seen him cry. Everybody goes to the kitchen in the church to eat. I pass a mirror and I don't recognize my face. I appeared to be someone else. I see the preacher eating enchiladas. He gets up to go to the bathroom, and I follow him. The preacher closes the bathroom door, and I proceed to kick it down. I stab the preacher to death and steal his wallet, and then I wake up.

The third one screwed with me! I dreamed I wrote a note to my friend explaining my feelings for him. I give it to him, I then wake up, but when I wake up I find the note I had written in the dream on my chest in the exact notebook I had written the note in, in my dream! Everything is the same, down to every frickin' detail!!!


----------



## Bunneh45 (Mar 30, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Yeah it's normal to be depressed, but you'll get used to it. Your friend will be important to you, if they aren't already. I don't mean to be an ass, I'm just saying try to watch what you do to your friends. I'm actually content... trapped, but content... I've been having crazy ass dreams lately!



I have actually been more happy since I posted here. I've finally started to actively accept my gayness. I have been more self-conscious about how things I do might be gay (I have started to notice I act a bit gay lol), so its a bit uncomfortably but oddly invigorating.

I hope you feel better


----------



## ForestFox91 (Mar 30, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> I have actually been more happy since I posted here. I've finally started to actively accept my gayness. I have been more self-conscious about how things I do might be gay (I have started to notice I act a bit gay lol), so its a bit uncomfortably but oddly invigorating.
> 
> I hope you feel better


After awhile when I tell my sad story, it releases some steam. And yeah I noticed my vocabulary is quite... well gay... I say things like cute, precious, pretty, sparkly, and other kooky shit.


----------



## Revy (Mar 30, 2009)

Thanks thanks everyone, now i can take a thrill in the hunt!



ForestFox91 said:


> After awhile when I tell my sad story, it releases some steam. And yeah I noticed my vocabulary is quite... well gay... I say things like cute, precious, pretty, sparkly, and other kooky shit.


You know I never really notice myself say things in a "gay" way cause I talk like any other straight guy lol. Saying the word fabulous at work will get you an " are you gay?" question lol...


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## Moka (Mar 31, 2009)

So, a couple months ago I mentioned that I wasn't really sure what I was, and that I've never been attracted to anyone. I've been doing some searching, and a lot has happened since then...

When I actually looked around and tried to consider people as potential partners rather than as just friends, I started to notice that some guys are really cute and sweet. I also discovered at a party one night that hugging another guy can make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. I can't say I like gay porn, but I've never liked straight porn much either. Gay furry, on the other hand, is really nice.

Between all that, I've come to the realization that I'm probably gay (and if not, than at the very least I'm bi).

Sometimes it feels really good having admitted this to myself. But other times it makes me feel depressed, though I'm not sure why. I wonder whether it's just a phase (though part of me hopes it's not, because I don't want that warm fuzzy feeling to go away). Other times, I wonder if I'm just deceiving myself (though I'm not sure what I'd have to gain). Is it normal to feel this way?

I finally worked up the courage to tell one close friend this evening, but I definitely don't feel like telling other people yet. Especially not my family.


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## xXWidowerXx (Mar 31, 2009)

Moka said:


> When I actually looked around and tried to consider people as potential partners rather than as just friends, I started to notice that some guys are really cute and sweet. I also discovered at a party one night that hugging another guy can make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. I can't say I like gay porn, but I've never liked straight porn much either. Gay furry, on the other hand, is really nice.
> 
> Between all that, I've come to the realization that I'm probably gay (and if not, than at the very least I'm bi).
> 
> ...


 
How did it go? Or have you told them yet?

I... I'm still on the question. I've gotten that warm feeling before from a girl... but that was when I was little. And I've never even kissed/been kissed on the lips before. But now.. well, when my friend pretends to get close and everything, my heart starts racing, I pretend to be grossed out or bothered but... secretly, I want to hug him. Lol, sounds creepy.

I think it's normal to feel depressed... it's not exactly an easy conclusion to come to, it's not like discovering you like math better than science. There's a lot you have to deal with because of it.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Mar 31, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> How did it go? Or have you told them yet?
> 
> I... I'm still on the question. I've gotten that warm feeling before from a girl... but that was when I was little. And I've never even kissed/been kissed on the lips before. But now.. well, when my friend pretends to get close and everything, my heart starts racing, I pretend to be grossed out or bothered but... secretly, I want to hug him. Lol, sounds creepy.
> 
> I think it's normal to feel depressed... it's not exactly an easy conclusion to come to, it's not like discovering you like math better than science. There's a lot you have to deal with because of it.


Ha yeah my friend does that I don't act grossed out anymore, I'm slowly coming out of the closet to him.


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## ForestFox91 (Mar 31, 2009)

Moka said:


> So, a couple months ago I mentioned that I wasn't really sure what I was, and that I've never been attracted to anyone. I've been doing some searching, and a lot has happened since then...
> 
> When I actually looked around and tried to consider people as potential partners rather than as just friends, I started to notice that some guys are really cute and sweet. I also discovered at a party one night that hugging another guy can make me feel warm and fuzzy inside. I can't say I like gay porn, but I've never liked straight porn much either. Gay furry, on the other hand, is really nice.
> 
> ...


Holy Shit! You actually came out to a person! Please lend me courage, I hate being in the closet!!


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## alicewater (Apr 1, 2009)

Hey, I remember when I only had one friend (even though her father didn't like me at all) and it sucked! But we are still friends and it will be 17 years this June, and she is also bi-sex. 
I may not have a huge crowd of friend but at least I have more then one that know me and I know them. Hell I even helped hook two of them up and are happily married with a child on the way.

And when and if I choose to come out to them about my bi-sex attraction to woman I know that they will be here to support and accept me! I've told a few people (including one girl I'm a little attracted to) and my boyfriend is coming out to his best friend this weekend and I will be there to show him my love and support!


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## Moka (Apr 1, 2009)

xXWidowerXx said:


> How did it go? Or have you told them yet?



It went well. It actually turned out to be one of those "oh, that's all?" type of  conversations.



xXWidowerXx said:


> I think it's normal to feel depressed... it's not exactly an easy conclusion to come to, it's not like discovering you like math better than science. There's a lot you have to deal with because of it.



I've actually found the next day that after talking it over with somebody, even one person (not to mention posting here), I felt tons better.

Though, there's still a few things that make me nervous. In particular, I discovered that my manager is one of only a small handful in my company who donated money in support of California Prop 8 (that's the one that bans gay marriage).



ForestFox91 said:


> Holy Shit! You actually came out to a person! Please lend me courage, I hate being in the closet!!



Okay, here's some courage. *hands over a small ornately wrapped package* ^_^


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## xXWidowerXx (Apr 2, 2009)

I think the problem is that I am incapable of being in a relationship and getting physical by any means, therefore I'm going to die a stranger to everyone.

lol.

Anyways, I'm gonna be gone off FAF for um... a long time, since a family member is staying in my room. Forest, I wish you luck and well. Goodbye for however long people.


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## Xipoid (Apr 2, 2009)

I'll be happier when people stop thinking it's such a big deal.


Spoiler



I'll never be happy.


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## Takun (Apr 2, 2009)

Xipoid said:


> I'll be happier when people stop thinking it's such a big deal.
> 
> 
> Spoiler
> ...



I don't treat it like one anymore >>

Actually came out to my friend last weekend.  And by that I mean when he asked about my ex he said, "Tell me about her."  and I'm like "you mean him." 

:V


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 2, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I don't treat it like one anymore >>
> 
> Actually came out to my friend last weekend.  And by that I mean when he asked about my ex he said, "Tell me about her."  and I'm like "you mean him."
> 
> :V



Heh what a way to come out. He reacted well I hope?


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 2, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Heh what a way to come out. He reacted well I hope?


Seriously... and I don't think I can handle another person asking me why I haven't been in any relationships lately!


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## Takun (Apr 2, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Heh what a way to come out. He reacted well I hope?



Of course.  It's no big deal.


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## Revy (Apr 2, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I don't treat it like one anymore >>
> 
> Actually came out to my friend last weekend. And by that I mean when he asked about my ex he said, "Tell me about her." and I'm like "you mean him."
> 
> :V


 You know if it was that easy I would of came out YEARS ago....


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## Xipoid (Apr 2, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> Of course.  It's no big deal.



Fucking high-five me, you cool bastard.


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## Takun (Apr 2, 2009)

Revy said:


> You know if it was that easy I would of came out YEARS ago....




I don't stress it as a big deal now days and it turns out not to be. =)



Xipoid said:


> Fucking high-five me, you cool bastard.





*motherfucking high-fives*


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 2, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> I don't stress it as a big deal now days and it turns out not to be. =)


I had a feeling it'd become easier later. I wish later was now though


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## JakXT (Apr 3, 2009)

I am Bi, I don't plan on telling anyone, I mean that would be pretty awkward to bring up in the middle of a conversation. But if anyone asked me i would tell them the truth without hesitation, I'm proud of who/what I am! 
Also good job to all those people who have come out, and good luck to those who are going to. ;3


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## Revy (Apr 3, 2009)

http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/wireStory?id=7237636

Why do people up north the best of some things ;[


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 3, 2009)

Revy said:


> http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/wireStory?id=7237636
> 
> Why do people up north the best of some things ;[


Vermont or bust!


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 3, 2009)

Hey, Iowa's supreme court unanimously decided against the constitutionality of banning same-sex marriage. That means 3 states now! (and maybe california and vermont too)

I don't think Vermont has a chance, though. Maybe in a few years.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 3, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Hey, Iowa's supreme court unanimously decided against the constitutionality of banning same-sex marriage. That means 3 states now! (and maybe california and vermont too)
> 
> I don't think Vermont has a chance, though. Maybe in a few years.


  Connecticut and Massachusetts allow same-sex marriage as well.


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 3, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> That means 3 states now!




;-)


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## Greyscale (Apr 4, 2009)

I'm really tempted to completely out myself completely this weekend... which is probably not the best idea... but still, i'm tempted...


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 4, 2009)

Greyscale said:


> I'm really tempted to completely out myself completely this weekend... which is probably not the best idea... but still, i'm tempted...


From what I hear it's a good thing you'll feel relieved, but I have a friend I'm going to come out to before spring break, he's going to texas for a week. So, I'll give him time to think. That's probably my best idea yet.


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## Kurama17 (Apr 6, 2009)

I have to start coming on here more >_>

Anyway....Yeah, a friend of mine gave me the decision, all 69 pages of it X_X


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 6, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I have to start coming on here more >_>
> 
> Anyway....Yeah, a friend of mine gave me the decision, all 69 pages of it X_X


yikes sorry about that... It's becoming harder to get my friend alone so I can come out to him. I wish I would have taken my opportunity 2 weeks ago. Yeah so I've been kicking myself in the head...


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## Kurama17 (Apr 7, 2009)

Well, you can thank Toonces for making me read it, but yeah. that sucks :|


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 7, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> Well, you can thank Toonces for making me read it, but yeah. that sucks :|


yeah we're going on a band trip tomorrow (band geeks ftw!) I'll take my notebook and sit next to him. Write notes to him. He's gonna be gone all spring break and he broke his phone so I'm gonna be lonely.


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## Kurama17 (Apr 7, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> yeah we're going on a band trip tomorrow (band geeks ftw!) I'll take my notebook and sit next to him. Write notes to him. He's gonna be gone all spring break and he broke his phone so I'm gonna be lonely.


 I'm always lonely, hun. A lot of us are. I could make a relationship advice thread, since I have a LOT of relationship stories, and none are good unfortunately.


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## Chazzfox (Apr 7, 2009)

This is a cool thread. I don't know when I was last on the FA forum but I didn't see this I guess.

I'm bisexual, and I have a really hard time admitting it. When I was starting to realize it, one of my best friends went on a rant about people getting on the bisexual-bandwagon. I hadn't said anything to her but I couldn't come out for like...a while.

I never really directly admitted it but when I started getting hot over Lucy Lawless it kinda got...obvious. Now I have a hard time NOT thinking about other girls but it's still wicked hard to admit, I don't want anyone to think I'm getting in on a trend. 

Bah :/  

Sorry for the like..mini rant of nothing.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 7, 2009)

Kurama17 said:


> I'm always lonely, hun. A lot of us are. I could make a relationship advice thread, since I have a LOT of relationship stories, and none are good unfortunately.


Aw that's to bad... We are just a bunch of sad saps, lookin' for love...



Chazzfox said:


> This is a cool thread. I don't know when I was last on the FA forum but I didn't see this I guess.
> 
> I'm bisexual, and I have a really hard time admitting it. When I was starting to realize it, one of my best friends went on a rant about people getting on the bisexual-bandwagon. I hadn't said anything to her but I couldn't come out for like...a while.
> 
> ...


Ah yeah, it took me for a long time to accept being gay. I had an attraction to a boy in my class in the 6th grade, and I entered the denial stage for 5 years. I got a crush on my best friend a month and a half ago, and just accepted it. I just haven't come out of the closet to him yet. I'm trying tomorrow. I'll try, but I can't guarantee it'll happen...  the closet isn't fun...


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## Chazzfox (Apr 7, 2009)

Denial must have been tough. I didn't really have a denial just...a weird time I guess. 

I hope you can come out to your friend! It really bites to have to stay in the closet x.x If he's your best friend at least he'll accept you, is he that kinda guy?


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## Ozymandias_ii (Apr 8, 2009)

Last summer, I told my parents I was bisexual. It didn't go down well. I had lots of hassle about it, as, at first, my mother was accepting, but my father was distraught, and she soon seen his way of thinking. I was constantly shunned for about a week, as it "wasn't normal" according to my parents, except by my sister, who was the only truly accepting one. I ended up having to use an opportunity to stay at my uncle's house to get away from it. I don't know how much I cried. When I came back, the subject in its entirety was taboo, and any mention of the subject involved a shouting match, and my father became more distant than he was before. Even now, my parents are not willing to accept it, and a couple of months ago, me and a friend were texting each other about a boy that I was interested in. My mother read those texts, and she kept it from my father, but expressed that she was disgusted with me, and threatened to isolate me and move me schools. I can only hope that, in time, they will begin to accept me for who I am.


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## PriestRevan (Apr 8, 2009)

Ozymandias_ii said:


> Last summer, I told my parents I was bisexual. It didn't go down well. I had lots of hassle about it, as, at first, my mother was accepting, but my father was distraught, and she soon seen his way of thinking. I was constantly shunned for about a week, as it "wasn't normal" according to my parents, except by my sister, who was the only truly accepting one. I ended up having to use an opportunity to stay at my uncle's house to get away from it. I don't know how much I cried. When I came back, the subject in its entirety was taboo, and any mention of the subject involved a shouting match, and my father became more distant than he was before. Even now, my parents are not willing to accept it, and a couple of months ago, me and a friend were texting each other about a boy that I was interested in. My mother read those texts, and she kept it from my father, but expressed that she was disgusted with me, and threatened to isolate me and move me schools. I can only hope that, in time, they will begin to accept me for who I am.


 
^this is pretty much what will happen to me.


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## Ozymandias_ii (Apr 8, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> ^this is pretty much what will happen to me.



I hope _no-one _has experience it again :/. Good luck with coming out ^^


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 9, 2009)

I CAME OUT TO THE FIRST PERSON EVER TODAY!!! 4/8/09 marks a special day! I emailed my best friend! I'll tell you all how he reacts tomorrow! I feel my bravery has never been so great before!


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## Rozgarden (Apr 9, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> I CAME OUT TO THE FIRST PERSON EVER TODAY!!! 4/8/09 marks a special day! I emailed my best friend! I'll tell you all how he reacts tomorrow! I feel my bravery has never been so great before!


 
Thats cool! but.. why didnt you call him or talk to him face to face


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 9, 2009)

rozgarden said:


> Thats cool! but.. why didnt you call him or talk to him face to face


His phone broke, and I couldn't get him alone! EVER! Today: We got on a bus for a band competition, played at the band competition, and went to the mall. He's a people person so getting him alone was impossible.


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## Revy (Apr 9, 2009)

Detailllllssssssssss?

How'd it go?


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 10, 2009)

Ugh. He hasn't replied! I told him, "Check your email first thing whenever you get home!" many times! Huh... I guess I'll call him on his sister's phone or something. He's gone to Texas for 2 weeks! He's so forgetful, but so damn cute!


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 10, 2009)

Yay, I'm glad you came out.

He could also be ignoring or purposely not answering your email, because the same kind of thing happened when you texted him. That would not necessarily be bad since he could be too embarrassed about it or not know how to reply. I know I would have a hard time formulating an answer in his position. Maybe he will be ready after his break.

Or, of course, he could have just forgotten to read it 

Keep us posted


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 10, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Yay, I'm glad you came out.
> 
> He could also be ignoring or purposely not answering your email, because the same kind of thing happened when you texted him. That would not necessarily be bad since he could be too embarrassed about it or not know how to reply. I know I would have a hard time formulating an answer in his position. Maybe he will be ready after his break.
> 
> ...


Yeah that is a strange coincidence. Maybe he knows... he still hangs out with me though... If he knows already, I wouldn't know how to feel, sad because he doesn't believe me, or happy because he feels that doesn't affect me at all as a person. I'm confused...


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## Chronic (Apr 10, 2009)

I came out at 16. My parents were like "meh, don't get pregnant" and I was all 8) .


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## Uro (Apr 10, 2009)

Chronic said:


> I came out at 16. My parents were like "meh, don't get pregnant" and I was all 8) .



My mom is just all worried about aids and stuff. Don't think my part-time jobs really help her security at all either lol.


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## Kurama17 (Apr 10, 2009)

Yeah, everyone knows my story, or those who bothered to read past pages. If you wanna hear it, IM me, I got time XD


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## Toaster (Apr 10, 2009)

none of us insane normal people care if you guys are furries. Just don't yiff us and you won't need to "come out" of any thing. your parents on the other hand.........well just hope that they are open minded :/


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## Kryn (Apr 10, 2009)

I feel like posting here cause of something that happened to me today.

I've know I was gay for roughly 5 years or so, there wasn't a real defining moment or any denial, just a gradual acceptance of it. The problem is I live in the middle southwest Virginia in a very rural god fearing area, which has always placed the huge fear of coming out over me. I suffered a lot of abuse in school from stupid kids that didnt' care and would call me fag and gay and other crap that doesn't matter now, they didn't even think I was really gay at the time. These things have prevented me from ever coming out and just being myself.

Anyway, today me, my sister, and her husband (we all live together with their child, my parents and my grandmother) were eating together watching tv and somehow we started talking about how people become gay. My sister claimed it was something people were born as, she asked her husband how he felt in highschool or whenever he started being attracted to girls and questioned whether it was something he could control or whether they were his simple true feelings. They sorta agreed it wasn't something one couldn't control and then he said that anyone who has these sorts of feelings should just go with it and live their lives how they want to and just say fuck what other people think.

Now, I've never told ANYONE I was gay, it was almost like they were just setting me up to come out right there. And I really REALLY wanted to just blurt it out and get it over with but I just couldn't. It just feels horrible being sorta trapped and they only thing keeping me in this cage is myself.


----------



## Kanin (Apr 10, 2009)

Kryn said:


> I feel like posting here cause of something that happened to me today.
> 
> I've know I was gay for roughly 5 years or so, there wasn't a real defining moment or any denial, just a gradual acceptance of it. The problem is I live in the middle southwest Virginia in a very rural god fearing area, which has always placed the huge fear of coming out over me. I suffered a lot of abuse in school from stupid kids that didnt' care and would call me fag and gay and other crap that doesn't matter now, they didn't even think I was really gay at the time. These things have prevented me from ever coming out and just being myself.
> 
> ...


 
You should've got swallowed what you were eating a casually, without even looking up, have said you're gay, and then go back to eating like you never said it.


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 10, 2009)

Well at least you know they will to a certain degree accept when you come out. There really wasn't that big of a point to do it at that moment (although it would have been an ideal situation), and there will be other times you could do it. Don't feel too pressured to come out; come out when you are ready.



> Yeah that is a strange coincidence. Maybe he knows... he still hangs out with me though... If he knows already, I wouldn't know how to feel, sad because he doesn't believe me, or happy because he feels that doesn't affect me at all as a person. I'm confused...



Honestly, if thats the case, I think he's too embarrassed or confused, but I don't think there is anything negative you can take from his silence. If he doesn't accept it or doesn't believe you I think he would have told you.

Meh just my opinion on the matter. I hope you get a good answer from him


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 10, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Honestly, if thats the case, I think he's too embarrassed or confused, but I don't think there is anything negative you can take from his silence. If he doesn't accept it or doesn't believe you I think he would have told you.
> 
> Meh just my opinion on the matter. I hope you get a good answer from him


You people are really nice especially Bunneh45. I hope I get a good answer as well, he's usually understanding, and he's not a loud mouth so he'll probably keep this a secret. I believe it's necessary for him to know, when thinking of people to come out to, he was first to my mind. It'll be even harder to tell him I'm in love with him.


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## Uro (Apr 10, 2009)

Kryn said:


> I feel like posting here cause of something that happened to me today.
> 
> I've know I was gay for roughly 5 years or so, there wasn't a real defining moment or any denial, just a gradual acceptance of it. The problem is I live in the middle southwest Virginia in a very rural god fearing area, which has always placed the huge fear of coming out over me. I suffered a lot of abuse in school from stupid kids that didnt' care and would call me fag and gay and other crap that doesn't matter now, they didn't even think I was really gay at the time. These things have prevented me from ever coming out and just being myself.
> 
> ...



What city in VA?
Anywhere near radford? haha.


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 10, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> You people are really nice especially Bunneh45. I hope I get a good answer as well, he's usually understanding, and he's not a loud mouth so he'll probably keep this a secret. I believe it's necessary for him to know, when thinking of people to come out to, he was first to my mind. It'll be even harder to tell him I'm in love with him.



Aw thanks. I've become more accepting of myself and have even though about coming out soon at some point since posting on here, so its helping me too


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## bearetic (Apr 11, 2009)

Yo '91: Maybe he'll leap up and kiss you one day out of the blue!!!! <3 <3 <3

lol, hope I didn't ruin things with high fantastic expectations


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## Kryn (Apr 11, 2009)

Uro said:


> What city in VA?
> Anywhere near radford? haha.



Actually, I live about an hour and a half from there near Martinsville.


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## bearetic (Apr 11, 2009)

Kryn: I eventually got to the point where I could mention it casually, but I still feel a bit nervous inside when I do, of course. I no longer fear the average person on the street knowing, and in fact feel good that people know. However you do it, or however you end up feeling, I hope you come out and it turns out well.


Now, for me, the family denial stage seems to be going well. I'm at home this weekend, and they don't bring it up all the time or treat me differently (well, because they don't think I'm gay, lol). When they did, tonight, for only a short while, I politely rebutted, and elaborated when necessary.

 Although I think I'm turning bi now, lol.

Now, if my family finds out I'm telling people I'm gay, I don't know what'll happen. I've been breaking through a lot of personal boundaries lately, so that might come soon. I do have at least one, good friend that'll help me out if I get kicked out, but I don't want to take the easy way out and just leave. I think my parents have the potential to understand. It'll just take time, patience, love, etc. I don't want to be too forceful or anything.

EDIT: 420th post, duuuuuuuude


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## Endless Humiliation (Apr 11, 2009)

character said:


> EDIT: 420th post, duuuuuuuude



*Smokes a pole* :baked:


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## Chacemc (Apr 11, 2009)

I may be naive, but I consider gay and homosexuality to be two different things. I find gay to be more of an open lifestyle... If you choose to live that way and be open about your sexuality that is great... and gay. But if you are a homosexual who is content with their sexuality and wants to keep the matter private, not necessarily for fear of what others would think, but because it is in fact a private matter to them then they are not really gay. Not that there is anything wrong with that either. As much as I hate it, gay is more a label people tag onto their name to say "Look at me! I'm homosexual and you get to know about it!" If you want to live that way, more power to you, but for other people, consider just being homosexual and keeping the matter private from the world.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

character said:


> Yo '91: Maybe he'll leap up and kiss you one day out of the blue!!!! <3 <3 <3
> 
> lol, hope I didn't ruin things with high fantastic expectations


I'd love for that too happen, but now you're just giving me more hopes... thanks a lot! *grumble grumble*


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 11, 2009)

Chacemc said:


> I may be naive, but I consider gay and homosexuality to be two different things. I find gay to be more of an open lifestyle... If you choose to live that way and be open about your sexuality that is great... and gay. But if you are a homosexual who is content with their sexuality and wants to keep the matter private, not necessarily for fear of what others would think, but because it is in fact a private matter to them then they are not really gay. Not that there is anything wrong with that either. As much as I hate it, gay is more a label people tag onto their name to say "Look at me! I'm homosexual and you get to know about it!" If you want to live that way, more power to you, but for other people, consider just being homosexual and keeping the matter private from the world.



Uuuhh. Gay is just a more casual word for homosexual, but ok.


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## Uro (Apr 11, 2009)

Kryn said:


> Actually, I live about an hour and a half from there near Martinsville.



Ah word, was wondering because I go to school down there haha.


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## Rozgarden (Apr 11, 2009)

I remember back in high school being head over heels for my best friend... I remember telling him once.. but nothing really happened.. It wasnt until years later that I found out he was actually gay..


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

rozgarden said:


> I remember back in high school being head over heels for my best friend... I remember telling him once.. but nothing really happened.. It wasnt until years later that I found out he was actually gay..


Aw that's sad. I'm sorry... well things happen...


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## TheRedRaptor (Apr 11, 2009)

One of the hardest things I have had to do is coming clean with my family.
Some were wondering why I was going down to the city of Brisbane a lot (about a 200 kilometer round trip), so I just told them that I have a loving boyfriend down there. Reactions were mixed to say the least.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

TheRedRaptor said:


> Reactions were mixed to say the least.


Inevitably, I fear the time my parents find out!


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## Shindo (Apr 11, 2009)

sadly i havent come out to any one except joo peeps, i doubt my parents would care, or really friends would. I just dont know what to do. I've never liked a guy, and havent considered going out with one, but (this is going to make me sound like a horn dog but) i like cock and not vaginas. I confuse my self. I might be bi-curious but i think its more than that.


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## Rozgarden (Apr 11, 2009)

Shindo said:


> sadly i havent come out to any one except joo peeps, i doubt my parents would care, or really friends would. I just dont know what to do. I've never liked a guy, and havent considered going out with one, but (this is going to make me sound like a horn dog but) i like cock and not vaginas. I confuse my self. I might be bi-curious but i think its more than that.


 
Its funny cause my bf has a really good friend who is gay and he has this shirt that looks like a college shirt, only it says COCKS. my bf once wore that over to my parents house.. dont think my mom saw it though


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

Shindo said:


> sadly i havent come out to any one except joo peeps,


Same for me. I can't seem to be able to tell anybody. My parents wouldn't be happy about it, but I have a friend that wouldn't care, at least I think so. It's hard to tell anybody though.


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## Rozgarden (Apr 11, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Same for me. I can't seem to be able to tell anybody. My parents wouldn't be happy about it, but I have a friend that wouldn't care, at least I think so. It's hard to tell anybody though.


 
its funny how you can talk to stranger on the internet about things like this, but when it comes to people who actually matter in your life, you dont.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

rozgarden said:


> its funny how you can talk to stranger on the internet about things like this, but when it comes to people who actually matter in your life, you dont.


Well you are indiscriminate, and this is a safe place to say so. It's easier to tell some one you don't know, that you don't see everyday. I'm concerned about the way my loved ones think of me.


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## Shindo (Apr 11, 2009)

yeah because you dont want the person you care about to leave but you could care less about strangers on the internet


but i love you guys, anyway its way easier to feel accepted on a site with a fair amount of gays, where no one is really anti-gay, when in the real world its very different


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

Shindo said:


> yeah because you dont want the person you care about to leave but you could care less about strangers on the internet
> 
> 
> but i love you guys, anyway its way easier to feel accepted on a site with a fair amount of gays, where no one is really anti-gay, when in the real world its very different


I believe you summed up what I was trying to say, thank you. Strangers people may be, but a stranger can become a friend through words and words alone.


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## Rozgarden (Apr 11, 2009)

tis true.. In a perfect world, parents are supportive and friends only care about your happiness and no one freaks out


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## Shindo (Apr 11, 2009)

well after posting those i just send a text to my best friend who is a girl that i think im bi and she hasnt responded yet...


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## Shindo (Apr 11, 2009)

she responded and said
:] thas coo.
I love you just the same.

this is the first time i've cried tears of joy. Im so happy and so streesed at the same time.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

Shindo said:


> she responded and said
> :] thas coo.
> I love you just the same.
> 
> this is the first time i've cried tears of joy. Im so happy and so streesed at the same time.


My friend didn't answer my emails or my texts! I don't know if he know's or not, or how he'd react!


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## Shindo (Apr 11, 2009)

when did you come out


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

Shindo said:


> when did you come out


twice: somewhere in March and April 8. Well those were my biggest attempts to tell my friend! That lovable oaf didn't respond though! I just need to tell him in person. Just getting him alone is impossible!


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## Shindo (Apr 11, 2009)

oh, im not sure if/when i want to tell my friends and family


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

Shindo said:


> oh, im not sure if/when i want to tell my friends and family


Take small steps, you've made farther than I have...


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## Shindo (Apr 11, 2009)

thanks, im so stressed right now i cant think straight i think i will wait until i can think better to figure every thing out.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 11, 2009)

Shindo said:


> thanks, im so stressed right now i cant think straight i think i will wait until i can think better to figure every thing out.


good idea, best not jump to conclusions...


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## Rozgarden (Apr 11, 2009)

foxie.. maybe he doesnt like you like that and really doesnt want to address the issue but likes you as a friend just the same and wants to pretend nothing happened


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## alicewater (Apr 12, 2009)

If I may make something of an observation here.

I've told a couple of people about myself being bi (mainly my female friends) and they were quiet excepting of it. And after reading past posts on this thread it would almost seem as if it's easier for woman to come out about there sexuality then it is men.


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## Chronic (Apr 12, 2009)

alicewater said:


> If I may make something of an observation here.
> 
> I've told a couple of people about myself being bi (mainly my female friends) and they were quiet excepting of it. And after reading past posts on this thread it would almost seem as if it's easier for woman to come out about there sexuality then it is men.


I really is. Gay men are thought to be "pansies", not manly, and a "humiliation" to fathers. Lesbians, well. Guys love lesbians. Bi? Even better! Means they can jump in!

*sigh* In a male dominated society, the guys who are gay are often thought of as "lesser" than a normal guy. Hard to explain, but it really all boils down to which one is more "normal". Girls hold hands and cuddle and kiss on the cheek all the time. How many dudes do that that aren't gay or Hispanic?


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## Rozgarden (Apr 12, 2009)

Agreed with chronic and alicewater.. but shouldnt we all be accepting of everyone.. after all it doesnt matter what the orientation is, what nationality is, what color they are.. what is it about our friends that makes us want to be their friend? its cause we like their personality - we identify with them. they accept the quirks they know about.. they make us laugh. they are there for us when we need it. when we are sad should we say "hell no. im not gonna talk to so and so because the are (enter whatever you want here)" I feel like its pointless to say this here because this site is what it is. 

bottom line - if our "friends" dont accept us for who we are, then they werent our friends to begin with. Family on the other hand should be supportive of who and what you are because they love you.


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## Shindo (Apr 12, 2009)

when i was in middle school girls would say they were bi when they really werent just for popularity, so from that i just thought being bi was fake, but here i am coming out to my best friend telling her im bi

@ rozgarden: that is only true in an ideal world


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 12, 2009)

rozgarden said:


> foxie.. maybe he doesnt like you like that and really doesnt want to address the issue but likes you as a friend just the same and wants to pretend nothing happened


The least that I want is for him to know, but we just stay friends. Sure it would be convenient if he loved me too, but only in my dreams... I would like to still be just friends with him... I just feel if I knew, he knew there would be some weight off my shoulders.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 12, 2009)

OMG! my friend finally emailed me back! I'm so happy!


I wrote:
 Josh this has to be the hardest thing I'll say to anybody, ever. I've tried to tell you many times, for almost 2 months, but as I said it's hard. Josh, please, don't take this the wrong way. I'm gay. I want nothing other to be a friends, but I won't lie, I have an attraction for you. I understand that you're straight, your with Shelby. I would never come in between you two. I respect that you have a relationship. Times are hard and all I need is a friend right now, NOTHING MORE! Please all I ask is your understanding...


He wrote:
Alrighty then... Just don't act strange, then it would be obvious. I'm probably going to convince myself that you are straight so I don't feel akward ok. Thank you for telling me though. 



He's really nice. I knew he'd be the right person to tell!


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## Shindo (Apr 12, 2009)

that response didnt really strike me as nice. but what evs, i told another one of my friends who is also bi, and she was really cool about it too.


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## Endless Humiliation (Apr 12, 2009)

I'm sure he would have felt more comfortable if you hadn't told him you had a crush on him but at least you got an "alrighty then".


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## Rozgarden (Apr 12, 2009)

Well at least it wasn't a "get away from me freak!" he was cool about it.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 12, 2009)

Shindo said:


> that response didnt really strike me as nice. but what evs, i told another one of my friends who is also bi, and she was really cool about it too.


Nice as in he didn't demean me at all. I don't think I'd get a perfect response anyway. It'll take time...


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## Shindo (Apr 12, 2009)

yeah, one of my friends is sort of depressed and i dont know if i should tell him.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 12, 2009)

Shindo said:


> yeah, one of my friends is sort of depressed and i dont know if i should tell him.


You should probably wait, you might not get a desired response, if the persons not it their desired mood.


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 12, 2009)

Hmm that response is a bit disappointing but it could be much worse. Congratulations!

As for me, I think my parents are going to put computer monitoring software on my computer (they think its in my best interest, haha right) so if I am not here for a long time then that is the case. I'll try to convince them its a bad idea or hope its a short term thing in that time, and also wait until school is over, before coming back on here despite the fact that my computer would be monitored. It wouldn't be the best way to come out to my parents but I am not going to let them take one of my few support systems away from me.

I am still not sure if it will happen or not, but heads up.


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## Rozgarden (Apr 12, 2009)

Computer monitoring softwares has it's ups and downs. Good luck with convincing the rents!


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## SnowFox (Apr 12, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Hmm that response is a bit disappointing but it could be much worse. Congratulations!
> 
> As for me, I think my parents are going to put computer monitoring software on my computer (they think its in my best interest, haha right) so if I am not here for a long time then that is the case. I'll try to convince them its a bad idea or hope its a short term thing in that time, and also wait until school is over, before coming back on here despite the fact that my computer would be monitored. It wouldn't be the best way to come out to my parents but I am not going to let them take one of my few support systems away from me.
> 
> I am still not sure if it will happen or not, but heads up.



If going against your parents isn't a concern I say "pffft" you can get around that. They can't rob us of our Bunneh


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 12, 2009)

SnowFox said:


> If going against your parents isn't a concern I say "pffft" you can get around that. They can't rob us of our Bunneh


If they do rob us of Bunneh we'll have to resort to drastic measures!


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 12, 2009)

Hahaha thanks guys 

I wouldn't really call it fighting back, although it is indirectly. It would just show them there are things they don't need to know about their child's life. Not sure if that would work though.

I could just format my harddrive once they put the stuff on (I don't have anything important on the hard drive) to get the crap off of it, and directly fight back but that would probably make things worse.

Hell, I don't know what I would do D:

I wouldn't be surprised if I am overreacting, they suggested they would do this once before and never went through. I'm just giving a heads up, don't be too worried 

Snowfox - on IRC I heard that someone named Snowfox hung himself. I thought it was you until I checked that you were still making posts. o_o pheww


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 12, 2009)

Keep a German dictionary handy! and write all your words "sdrawkcab."


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## SnowFox (Apr 12, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Snowfox - on IRC I heard that someone named Snowfox hung himself. I thought it was you until I checked that you were still making posts. o_o pheww



:shock: that's news to me.

I don't really want to derail the thread any more, but as for the monitoring software... I don't really know how they work, or if it could be as simple as just disabling whatever process it has running in the background, or maybe you could do all your FA browsing in a virtual machine (I don't know if it would pick up on that). Or just install your own dual boot that your parents don't know about and use the second one for anything you don't want them to see. That way you could leave the monitoring software as it is and they wouldn't have any reason to suspect anything.

Or just browse lots of disgusting sites until it traumatizes them so much they stop wanting to know what you're doing


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 12, 2009)

Unfortunately, the software is a bit more advanced than you might think. A lot of them don't show up in the task manager, and are basically invisible. I am not sure the dual boot thing would work but I could try it, thanks.

Sorry for derailing the thread


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## Shindo (Apr 14, 2009)

just stab your computer

PROBLEM SOLVER :3


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## Gynx (Apr 14, 2009)

If I were to come out, suicide would probably be the best answer. I definitely wouldn't be accepted in the society I live in.


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## Rozgarden (Apr 14, 2009)

Gynx said:


> If I were to come out, suicide would probably be the best answer. I definitely wouldn't be accepted in the society I live in.


 
what society do you live in?


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

Without stealing anyone's thunder hopefully... 

I'm 17 going on 18 in just two weeks and as recently as last November I came out as bisexual to...myself which arguably was the single most difficult thing I've done emotionally. I didn't even realize until after I did say it out loud to myself that it was such a big deal to me, it felt rather liberating.

Ever since 8th grade I always wondered whether or not I wasn't straight, and I remember the exact day to the second, to the power point slide as well, during sex ed class, and my teacher asked a really deep question. It hit me harder than I expected...Could you be gay...and I was like pssh noooo I like bewbies... then I thought not but a split second later, maybe. I struggled silently about it for years....long story short...

I now don't think I'm bi, but just gay...and I feel like AAAAAAh again. Friday in a very impromptu manner I casually squeezed in during a car rid conversation that I'm bi, after another one of my friends, a girl, said she was bi (there were three of us my two best friends who I hadn't seen in a long times after switching schools my senior year which really just adds to my drama . After I told them, I haven't been able to stop thinking that I'm just gay rather than bi...I don't like talking about my sexuality, but I think I have to now... 

Basically I'm back to square one on the whole "am I gay" thing and unfortunately it's not easier the second time around. I'm way to afraid to tell anyone, I know that  I can't tell my parents my mother would die of a heart attack, or possibly go off the deep and go pseudo-postal on me.

But I want to tell someone, all my feelings and emotions have changed in the last few months and I'm all twisted up.  I donno...I'm the kinda person who has a strong internal locus of control, but it's been pulled way out to timbuktu now and I've been very unstable, nervous, emotional, mood swingy, and just depressed.

Heh


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 14, 2009)

Please feel welcome to post here, no one is stealing anyone's thunder 

I feel for you, thats almost the same way I felt. Don't feel too pressured to choose either straight or gay (bisexuality is kind of a uncomfortable position for some). You don't have to label yourself unless you are sure you identify with a sexual orientation.

Also, learn to love yourself, despite what sexual orientation you are. I'm not saying you would hate yourself if you are gay, but what I am saying is make it clear to yourself that whatever orientation you are you will still love yourself. This will help you to be able to take an objective view at your sexuality, and then it might be surprisingly easy to find out what your preference is. I felt the exact way you did until I just said, fuck it, it doesn't even matter. I'll just be open to any gender, and then at that point it became really clear to me that I was mostly (if not totally) gay because I wasn't as obsessed about labeling myself as before.

tl;dr: don't worry about "labeling" yourself as one or the other, and don't think of sexual preference as a label, think it as, well, a preference.

Hope it helped


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> Without stealing anyone's thunder hopefully...
> 
> I'm 17 going on 18 in just two weeks and as recently as last November I came out as bisexual to...myself which arguably was the single most difficult thing I've done emotionally. I didn't even realize until after I did say it out loud to myself that it was such a big deal to me, it felt rather liberating.
> 
> ...


Just as Bunneh said, don't pressure yourself. I thought pretty much the same thing, "I liek bubes 'cause it's kewl" then I thought, "I love no one I'm asexual," then I thought "I'm think I'm bi..." then I finally came to the conclusion, "I <3 MEN!!!" Yeah it'll take time...


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

"I love no one I'm asexual"

Yea I went there too, that was a very depressing time period...


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> "I love no one I'm asexual"
> 
> Yea I went there too, that was a very depressing time period...


not fun at all... but it makes you look like a bad ass


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> not fun at all... but it makes you look like a bad ass



To who?


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> To who?


 I'm not being serious tbh sorry about that...


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## Corto (Apr 14, 2009)

To the very lonely


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> I'm not being serious tbh sorry about that...



Oh :neutral:... it was kinda.. funny.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> Oh :neutral:... it was kinda.. funny.


I'm really sorry if I offended you...


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

Aah! no I'm not offended sorry for making you feel offended! Sorry >< I'm sorry I'm really bad a this kinda thing sorry. You guys are perfect, and really are nice sorry I'm coming off offended I wasn't don't feel that way D:.

I thought it was kinda funny really!

Forgive me please, heh.


These emoticons just don't work for me sorry 

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/01/i-sorry.jpg


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> Aah! no I'm not offended sorry for making you feel offended! Sorry >< I'm sorry I'm really bad a this kinda thing sorry. You guys are perfect, and really are nice sorry I'm coming off offended I wasn't don't feel that way D:.
> 
> I thought it was kinda funny really!
> 
> ...


 We're too alike...


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> We're too alike...



Why's that?


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> "I love no one I'm asexual"
> 
> Yea I went there too, that was a very depressing time period...





ForestFox91 said:


> Just as Bunneh said, don't pressure yourself. I thought pretty much the same thing, "I liek bubes 'cause it's kewl" then I thought, "I love no one I'm asexual," then I thought "I'm think I'm bi..." then I finally came to the conclusion, "I <3 MEN!!!" Yeah it'll take time...



Hey, me too. I think it must be denial or something, because I didn't really want to face the fact that I could be gay so I just hid behind that for a while. It felt comfortable for a while until I started to start getting depressed about it.


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## zookle2 (Apr 14, 2009)

when I first came out it was to my mom. I had it all planned out I knew exactlly what to say to make it easy for me. But right as soon as I was about to start I accidentally blurted it out. It was weird I felt so light-headed I could faint. But the thing that really got me was that she thought that I was just going though a phase. That hurt I really dont like it when people dont believe me when I tell the truth especially when I open up my soul for them to see.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> Why's that?


  apologetic...


Bunneh45 said:


> Hey, me too. I think it must be denial or something, because I didn't really want to face the fact that I could be gay so I just hid behind that for a while. It felt comfortable for a while until I started to start getting depressed about it.


I couldn't think of myself gay for the longest time. It seemed to never come to mind...


----------



## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Hey, me too. I think it must be denial or something, because I didn't really want to face the fact that I could be gay so I just hid behind that for a while. It felt comfortable for a while until I started to start getting depressed about it.




Aaaah get out of my head ><


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> Aaaah get out of my head ><


we're in each others heads! bwahahaha!


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> we're in each others heads! bwahahaha!



Hehee that made me laugh ^-^..god that felt good...


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 14, 2009)

Further said:


> Hehee that made me laugh ^-^..god that felt good...


glad to make you feel better! :3


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 14, 2009)

Haha, we're all on the same wavelength it seems



zookle2 said:


> when I first came out it was to my mom. I had it all planned out I knew exactlly what to say to make it easy for me. But right as soon as I was about to start I accidentally blurted it out. It was weird I felt so light-headed I could faint. But the thing that really got me was that she thought that I was just going though a phase. That hurt I really dont like it when people dont believe me when I tell the truth especially when I open up my soul for them to see.



Aw, sorry about that. Congratulations on coming out though!

I know its a bit of a bad reaction, but it could have been much worse. Hopefully your parents will come around at some point when they realize its much more than just a phase. Good luck on that... it must feel awful opening up and being rejected like that


----------



## Shindo (Apr 14, 2009)

okay so i came out to my older sister, also bi. my dad. one of my best friends who is a guy and his girl friend who i am also very good friends with. And two other lady friends. Everyone has been super supportive. But i still have to tell my mom and 3 of my best friends. wish me luck


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## Further (Apr 14, 2009)

Shindo said:


> okay so i came out to my older sister, also bi. my dad. one of my best friends who is a guy and his girl friend who i am also very good friends with. And two other lady friends. Everyone has been super supportive. But i still have to tell my mom and 3 of my best friends. wish me luck



Best of luck! ^-^


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 14, 2009)

Glad to hear that, good luck with the rest, and keep us posted


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## Xorin (Apr 15, 2009)

hello all, this is a great thread. and it helps to know that there are other people out there who are furry and confused like i am.  i myself am conflicted.  i am not sexually attracted to the female, and i find the male body beautiful and something to take comfort in.  my parents and best friends know about my plight and struggle, and i am going to therapy to talk about this (my friends are fine with the possibility of me being gay).  but, i feel like i am lying to the therapist and my family when i only find myself more attracted to men.  im just about to finish college and get a steady job, thus providing the money to move out of my parents house.  i'm thinking of talking to them about this again once i move out and a fair distance from the family.  it is just so difficult, arrgh...what to do, what to do??


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## TheRedRaptor (Apr 15, 2009)

I used to be asexual then bam!


----------



## Gynx (Apr 15, 2009)

Rozgarden said:


> what society do you live in?



One that is very scared of things they do not understand, and one that, when scared, would most likely use violence to iron out those who are different. Either that or the people who are different are made to feel like they don't exist or belong unless they 'fit in'.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 15, 2009)

TheRedRaptor said:


> I used to be asexual then bam!


Bam lol! Good onomatopoeia for that!


----------



## bearetic (Apr 15, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Please feel welcome to post here, no one is stealing anyone's thunder
> 
> I feel for you, thats almost the same way I felt. Don't feel too pressured to choose either straight or gay (bisexuality is kind of a uncomfortable position for some). You don't have to label yourself unless you are sure you identify with a sexual orientation.
> 
> ...



I can be shy when it comes to talking about my problems, I feel like I don't want to be an attention whore. Thanks, even though that wasn't directed at me 

And the rest of that helped. I'm a bit confused now that I'm starting to come out, but if I'm open to anyone and just consider it a preference and not a hard and fast label, then I should be fine.

Take the "fuck it all" approach >



zookle2 said:


> when I first came out it was to my mom. I had it all planned out I knew exactlly what to say to make it easy for me. But right as soon as I was about to start I accidentally blurted it out. It was weird I felt so light-headed I could faint. But the thing that really got me was that she thought that I was just going though a phase. That hurt I really dont like it when people dont believe me when I tell the truth especially when I open up my soul for them to see.



Don't worry, denial is just a phase for them, lol 

But seriously, many parents, mine included, go through denial. One thing my parents do is take flamboyant gays or queens, point and laugh, and say, "see, you don't act like that, you're not gay." 

I can't think of much more while I'm in class, but I hope I can help you out!



Gynx said:


> One that is very scared of things they do not understand, and one that, when scared, would most likely use violence to iron out those who are different. Either that or the people who are different are made to feel like they don't exist or belong unless they 'fit in'.



That's sad to hear in this day and age


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 15, 2009)

A wise word:
The road to acceptance is a long, newly cobbled, road. One must walk upon it's rough stones, to smooth the way for those behind them.


----------



## Xephyrr (Apr 15, 2009)

Meh.. I think it's funny, I'm not attracted to the opposite sex in real life, but only as a furry... I got problems.. Being bi rocks I guess? No one knows, and I can't tell anyone, since I don't like guys in real life. I love my girlfriend extremely though . And yet I am attracted to guy furries.

Anyone can help?


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 15, 2009)

Ok, you seem to me like you are a guy who is attracted to females in real life (I assume) and furry males.

There, done.

Nothing more you need to know, really. Just don't feel too pressured to decide what you like, be open to whoever you feel comfortable with. 

Advice to follow when deciding your sexual preference:
Sexual preference is what you observe your preferred gender to be, not a guideline to follow. You shouldn't live your life according to your sexual preference, you should define your sexual preference according to your life.

If you are a straight guy who likes gay furry, you are a straight guy who likes gay furry. 

Hope it helps!

Edit: Lol, I think I get more and more confident about my own sexuality the more I write stuff like this, kind of like when you are not fully understanding a math problem and you try to explain it to someone and suddenly you get it.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 15, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> Lol, I think I get more and more confident about my own sexuality the more I write stuff like this, kind of like when you are not fully understanding a math problem and you try to explain it to someone and suddenly you get it.


>.< I hate math... but you're right, good analogy none the less...


----------



## Further (Apr 16, 2009)

"If you are a straight guy who likes gay furry, you are a straight guy who likes gay furry."

My inner psychologist wants to investigate that dearly X3


----------



## bearetic (Apr 16, 2009)

You are where you're at now, and if you find yourself in a different place later, well, that's that! lol, so deep.


----------



## Further (Apr 16, 2009)

character said:


> You are where you're at now, and if you find yourself in a different place later, well, that's that! lol, so deep.



you and fox are philosophizers :3


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 16, 2009)

Further said:


> you and fox are philosophizers :3


 why thank you


----------



## Shindo (Apr 16, 2009)

^ not deep


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 16, 2009)

Shindo said:


> ^ not deep


Excuse moi!


----------



## bearetic (Apr 16, 2009)

Further said:


> you and fox are philosophizers :3


:3



Shindo said:


> ^ not deep


It doesn't have to be deep to be right >


----------



## Shindo (Apr 16, 2009)

^ less deep and incorrect

YENAS ARE THE DEEPEST CREATURES 
listen to this

"Oh wait, wait, wait. I got one, I got one. Make mine a "cub" sandwich. Whatcha think?"
- shenzi, the lion king


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 16, 2009)

Shindo said:


> ^ less deep and incorrect
> 
> YENAS ARE THE DEEPEST CREATURES
> listen to this
> ...


WTF are you babbling about you twit?


----------



## Revy (Apr 17, 2009)

Finally one of my gay friends recently got internet again after 4 months, we were gonna go out obe da
y when all of a sudden we lost all communication with each other... u.u


----------



## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 17, 2009)

What is called when your attracted to gay yiff, but not to RL guys?

And when your attracted to chicks in RL, but not much in yiff?


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 17, 2009)

Ark said:


> What is called when your attracted to gay yiff, but not to RL guys?
> 
> And when your attracted to chicks in RL, but not much in yiff?



Bisexual of sorts, you lean more towards women. Go with what you're attracted to in RL.


----------



## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 17, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Bisexual of sorts, you lean more towards women. Go with what you're attracted to in RL.



Eh, ok :nonchalant:


----------



## bearetic (Apr 17, 2009)

It's called "Why does it need a label?" I guess if you want to tell people offhand maybe that'd help, although if it's just yiff, I'd say don't worry about that too much. Bisexual-ish works, although I'd say your preference would be more "straight", especially if there's little to no IRL crossover.

I do wonder how this is possible. Not dissing you or anything.

Smartass remark evolved into a reply, although I did say what's already been said. Oh well. *shrug*


----------



## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 17, 2009)

character said:


> It's called "Why does it need a label?" I guess if you want to tell people offhand maybe that'd help, although if it's just yiff, I'd say don't worry about that too much. Bisexual-ish works, although I'd say your preference would be more "straight", especially if there's little to no IRL crossover.
> 
> I do wonder how this is possible. Not dissing you or anything.
> 
> Smartass remark evolved into a reply, although I did say what's already been said. Oh well. *shrug*



I'll see where it takes me, right now I got more important things to do. So who knows, I might lean more Bi than anything at the moment.


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 17, 2009)

To be completely obvious, I'm going to contradict myself earlier and say I think it pretty much means you're gay if you look at gay furry predominately.

You could be more attracted to men but still enjoy sex with females - because its sex. 

I still guess it could work that way, being attracted to female humans but male furries, but I still stand by the advice that you shouldn't get too twisted up in labeling yourself.


----------



## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 17, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> To be completely obvious, I'm going to contradict myself earlier and say I think it pretty much means you're gay if you look at gay furry predominately.
> 
> You could be more attracted to men but still enjoy sex with females - because its sex.
> 
> I still guess it could work that way, being attracted to female humans but male furries, but I still stand by the advice that you shouldn't get too twisted up in labeling yourself.



Can't say I'm gay either, because I don't know if I have the feeling to lay with a homosexual.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 18, 2009)

just go with what you feel comfortable with in RL


----------



## Keenan~ArcticFox (Apr 19, 2009)

Just thought I might throw in the fact (and I don't know if this has been mentioned already but im not going to read all 26 pages of the thread) that the podcast "Knotcast" covers a lot topics brought up in this podcast and the guys (and occasional token female) give a lot of very good advice on coming out about Bisexuality and Homosexuality. If you have a problem or issue about coming out, write into the show. 

www.foxstuffers.com

There are a lot of good things and loads of good advice coming from this thread. 
Keep it up.


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 19, 2009)

Keenan~ArcticFox said:


> Just thought I might throw in the fact (and I don't know if this has been mentioned already but im not going to read all 26 pages of the thread) that the podcast "Knotcast" covers a lot topics brought up in this podcast and the guys (and occasional token female) give a lot of very good advice on coming out about Bisexuality and Homosexuality. If you have a problem or issue about coming out, write into the show.
> 
> www.foxstuffers.com
> 
> ...



I would have to suggest Dan Savage's podcast instead, because Knotcast is more explicit and adult and not very informative, really, while Savage Love is more informative and educational even though its still very explicit. Savage Love has a very redeeming informative/advice side to it while Knotcast is more entertainment oriented.



ForestFox91 said:


> just go with what you feel comfortable with in RL



Good point.


----------



## Kanin (Apr 19, 2009)

Keenan~ArcticFox said:


> Just thought I might throw in the fact (and I don't know if this has been mentioned already but im not going to read all 26 pages of the thread) that the podcast "Knotcast" covers a lot topics brought up in this podcast and the guys (and occasional token female) give a lot of very good advice on coming out about Bisexuality and Homosexuality. If you have a problem or issue about coming out, write into the show.
> 
> www.foxstuffers.com
> 
> ...


 
Omg, I got bored and decided to listen to it, it is so fucking funny! XD


----------



## Endless Humiliation (Apr 19, 2009)

I love Dan Savage : )


----------



## Keenan~ArcticFox (Apr 19, 2009)

I am a huge fan of Dan Savage's podcasts but I find that Knotcast has a better focus on the nitty gritty details around coming out. Plus, its furry! YAY


----------



## bearetic (Apr 19, 2009)

Just started listening to Knotcast but have heard them refer to Dan Savage. I think I'll go download his podcast now. Or later, because it's 3AM. Thanks!

PS: Knotcast is hilarious. And furry.


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 20, 2009)

I told my best friend that I was gay several weeks ago and he shrugged it off, saying that it was no big deal to him, which I thought went very well.

Last night I told another one of my friends over facebook and talked to him today.
He said he accepts me, but is currently not used to it. (not that I expected him to be)

I think that I'll keep telling my close friends, but this makes me wonder; if it gets to the point where all of my friends know, I don't know if I'll be able to keep it from my parents, and I don't exactly look forward to living through the rest of highschool misunderstood by my parents. So, the thing is, I would like suggestions as to how to let them know without having a large confrontation. I think I should give them time to talk with eachother before me.


----------



## Further (Apr 20, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I told my best friend that I was gay several weeks ago and he shrugged it off, saying that it was no big deal to him, which I thought went very well.
> 
> Last night I told another one of my friends over facebook and talked to him today.
> He said he accepts me, but is currently not used to it. (not that I expected him to be)
> ...



*hugs* it's tough i know


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 20, 2009)

I saw my friend after not seeing him for a week. During his time away I told him that I was gay. He said he accepted me, but seemed to not understand. Then, when I finally got to see him again, he seemed carefree. He was excited to see me in fact. He didn't treat me any different at all! The subject was only mentioned once, and we continued on. It went a lot better than I thought it would


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 20, 2009)

Yaaaay 

Man I need to get off my lazy ass and come out or something now 



> I told my best friend that I was gay several weeks ago and he shrugged it off, saying that it was no big deal to him, which I thought went very well.
> 
> Last night I told another one of my friends over facebook and talked to him today.
> He said he accepts me, but is currently not used to it. (not that I expected him to be)
> ...


It really depends on what sort of reaction you expect from your parents. If you don't know, mention some news on gay marriage or something offhandedly and judge their reaction.

If you think they will have a good or decent reaction, go for it!

It might be best to wait until you are financially dependent if you think your parents will have a very very negative reaction. Being disowned is worse than a couple of years with your parents not understanding you.

If its somewhere in-between it really comes down to what makes you comfortable. Weigh living a lie for a few years against a possibly negative reaction and decide which is better.

The only real piece of advice on the actual coming out is do not use it as a weapon. Don't blurt it out during an argument or something in order to hurt them. For a lot of parents, unfortunately, the knowledge that their son or daughter is gay can hurt them or surprise them in a way that will hurt the situation greatly. This is the case even if your parents aren't homophobic.

Good luck! Congratulations on getting so far!
Keep us posted


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 20, 2009)

I was sorta thinking of going down to the bookstore one day and buying one of those "So Your Child Is Gay" books, then leaving it on the counter with a note when I leave for school, giving said family a chance to discuss before I get home.
What do you guys think of that?


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 20, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I was sorta thinking of going down to the bookstore one day and buying one of those "So Your Child Is Gay" books, then leaving it on the counter with a note when I leave for school, giving said family a chance to discuss before I get home.
> What do you guys think of that?


You'll definitely want to read through it first


----------



## Shindo (Apr 20, 2009)

i told my mom and she doesnt believe me, she thinks im straight


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 20, 2009)

Shindo said:


> i told my mom and she doesnt believe me, she thinks im straight


You tried and you have unmatched courage!


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 20, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> You'll definitely want to read through it first



Yeah, that's what I was thinking.


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 21, 2009)

I think it still depends on how you think your parents will react. I am still curious xD


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 21, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> I think it still depends on how you think your parents will react. I am still curious xD


My mom is christian, but I'm very unsure of her reaction. She'd either be strange about it and say I still love you, or be strange about it and treat me like shit.
She's forgiving, but also very Christian!


----------



## Ceuper (Apr 21, 2009)

I'm pretty sure I just found out that I'm gay.


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## Endless Humiliation (Apr 21, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> I'm pretty sure I just found out that I'm gay.



How?


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 21, 2009)

He took a blood test and it came out rainbow


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## Shindo (Apr 21, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> He took a blood test and it came out rainbow



we've got us a gay


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## Kanin (Apr 21, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> He took a blood test and it came out rainbow


 
Oh god, I lol'd


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 21, 2009)

Told another person I just met today, and she didn't care because she said her boyfriend's bi. That makes 3 people that know.

I've been trying to hint to my parents, but they haven't done anything to show they understand the point I'm trying to get across; I should really get that book soon...


----------



## Kanin (Apr 22, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> Told another person I just met today, and she didn't care because she said her boyfriend's bi. That makes 3 people that know.
> 
> I've been trying to hint to my parents, but they haven't done anything to show they understand the point I'm trying to get across; I should really get that book soon...


 
Maybe they already knew and figured it out a long time ago.


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## CrispSkittlez (Apr 22, 2009)

Lord Kanin said:


> Maybe they already knew and figured it out a long time ago.



I honestly doubt that, as I've only known for little over a month now, I just think that if they say anything, they'll worry about offending me or something.


----------



## Revy (Apr 22, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> He took a blood test and it came out rainbow


 that would be awesome x3


----------



## Curagnaste (Apr 22, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> He took a blood test and it came out rainbow


 that's going into my list of favorite moments. Anyway, I am Bi. The whole school knows this already. So does my mom, and she's understanding. Some people mock me for it, but I've learned to ignore them. Flip them, that's what I say. Nothing they do is going to stop me from being happy with who I am.


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## Kanin (Apr 22, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I honestly doubt that, as I've only known for little over a month now, I just think that if they say anything, they'll worry about offending me or something.


 
Who knows, some parents are actually pretty aware of their kids, parents like that often know before the kids.


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## Ceuper (Apr 22, 2009)

Load_Blown said:


> How?



Just a ticklish feeling in my stomach. :3 



Bunneh45 said:


> He took a blood test and it came out rainbow



Do you have any idea how terrifying that would be?


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 22, 2009)

I found out I was gay when I stepped into a church and burst into rainbow flames!


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## Shindo (Apr 22, 2009)

i told my best friend since i was a baby that i was bi, and he was cool with it  people knowing makes life so much easier


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## Kanin (Apr 22, 2009)

Shindo said:


> i told my best friend since i was a baby that i was bi, and he was cool with it  people knowing makes life so much easier


 
That's good.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 22, 2009)

Shindo said:


> i told my best friend since i was a baby that i was bi, and he was cool with it  people knowing makes life so much easier


I told my friend that I was gay recently, for the most part he's okay with it. He still laughs with me, but I can tell he get's uncomfortable sometimes. It does help a lot to have at least someone knows!


----------



## Revy (Apr 22, 2009)

Shindo said:


> i told my best friend since i was *a baby* that i was bi, and he was cool with it  people knowing makes life so much easier


 teach?


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## Shindo (Apr 22, 2009)

Revy said:


> teach?



whaaa?



any way i just talked with my parents and they think im a man-whore now 
so i can hardly hang out with my friends (obviously we are having butt sex)
and they will go through my history (if they found out i was a furry it would make things worse, and they think im going to tell someone my address through the internet) 

irrational parents are irrational
i doubt ill be on too much in the following weeks, as if that means anything to you.


----------



## Curagnaste (Apr 22, 2009)

Shindo said:


> whaaa?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 I shall remember your company. I'm glad my mom was understanding  whe I came out though.


----------



## Kanin (Apr 22, 2009)

Shindo said:


> whaaa?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 
That's retarded, but at least they believed you this time. That is a good thing, right?


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 22, 2009)

Our parents try to teach us how to tolerate others and be nice to people. Then it happens... they shun you they begin to not believe you, then they have to shut you down. Our parents are obsessed with becoming our worst enemies. Why? They come from a generation where power hunger is prominent. I haven't come out to my parents, but my mom says gays are icky and my dad says they're all girly. I can't stand it! The thought never comes to them, that I might be gay. It's never a possibility to them. When parents have a child they never think 'I wonder if my kid is going to be gay.' Society must have its eyes opened!


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 22, 2009)

Fortunately, not all parents, though. My parents attended the prop-8 protest and have "teach tolerance" bumper stickers (my dad got called a fag once because of it, lol). It makes me feel lame, though, because I still haven't came out, but its mostly because of my own insecurities I guess. This doesn't mean they will react perfectly, though, they may still not consider the fact that their child could be gay (plus my sister apparently claims she's bisexual and my parents are doubtful about it (I overheard a conversation), but then again, knowing my sister, she could possibly be the *one* case of someone just going through a phase). I wouldn't be surprised if they have doubts I'm straight, though.

There's hope.

I wish you guys had more accepting parents, though


----------



## Kanin (Apr 22, 2009)

I have no idea what my mom views of gays are, all I know is she voted against prop 8. As for my dad, I kind of know, but you can't be completely sure. I know my dad doesn't believe there is such thing as bi, *facepalm*, he thinks that it just means someone doesn't want to come completely out of the closest. So...yeah.


----------



## iBolt! (Apr 22, 2009)

That's terrible, takumi  Hope things have improved for you since. And I have to say that this could be the most helpful thread some people have ever read... won't be me, though, as I have already come out.

For me it began in 2004 when I first realized I "am not gay, but I sure as hell am not straight." 2005 was an emotionally depressing year because of a few things I will not mention which absolutely destroyed my self-esteem. On my birthday of 2005, I began to worry about it, so I looked up on Google "changing sexual orientation". I, of course, denied everything that would say you can't, but I came across some bogus study that said if you masturbate to what you want to be attracted to, you will eventually be attracted to it by instinct. So I tried it...
...for two and a half years....
...no results.

Around May of 2007 I had first realized it would not work. It just randomly dawned on me one evening... and this led to the dawning of a terrible depression. For a few days, I had suicidal wishes and thoughts... not like I could do it myself, but I wished something would just jump out and kill me. It was around this time I began to read up on homosexuality and related sexualities and exactly how to tell exactly what I was. It confused me more than anything, but what did not confuse me was the depression that was said to come with it.

Out of denial, I dated 3 girls around the beginning of 2008. None worked out, and each one left me feeling lower and even more depressed than the last.

On the morning of February 15, 2008, I found the label "furry" and actually thought I'd look it up. I remember my exact words before I fell asleep that morning, "That's the label I've been looking for... why doesn't this feel like a big life milestone?" Well, that milestone could wait another day. The next morning the low self-esteem, fear of judgment, and now this label came together in a painful urge to tell someone. I thought gay thoughts and it kinda turned me on, and that opened pandora's box. February 15 became the most emotionally painful day of my life, as all day these terrible urges to tell my family started clawing at me, as if they were killing me alive inside using my own emotions as the hitman. On the quote, "I cannot live like this. If these urges return tomorrow, I'm gonna say it." I went to bed early to escape.
The next morning I woke up in fear that these urges would return. It did not take long till they did, and I was going to say it till I realized my dad was asleep. So, later that day watching a race on TV, the worst urge yet came over me and I couldn't hold it back any longer... I couldn't break the promise to myself. Walking down the 'green mile', I chuckled maniacally to myself, "I'm gonna do it and no one's gonna stop me."
Words cannot describe the fear that I was experiencing. It was mind-numbing.
So I told my dad that I'm a bisexual furry. He was seemingly okay with it.
My mom was very curious about the fandom.
My sister said if it makes me happy, she's happy.

Three months passed and I was the happiest I'd been since the very quiet year of 2006.

Three more months passed and school started back. It was now bugging me that I was continuing to lie to everyone in that school, especially my friends.

Three more months passed and things settled down. Didn't really have anymore urges to tell anyone.

In December of 2008 I developed my fourth male anthro crush (Bolt) and began to write fanfiction for the movie. This movie... this crush... could have been what has indirectly given me the most happiness I have ever felt in my life. I continued writing fanfiction through January. Toward the end of January I began to feel depressed again. I knew it was just a matter of time till I tell all my school friends. I did so on February 4, 2009 (if you haven't noticed, I am good at dates). Then I developed a crush on this dude named Chris, a fanfic reviewer of mine and a fellow furry. The love was returned. Didn't last that long, though... kinda fizzled. But, that proved to me that YES, I can love too! On top of this, I met a few furries in my school. During the week of National Single's Awareness (Valentine's) Day, I went into the week thinking it'd be awful...
It was the single greatest week of my life. I found pride and love.

More recently I have found myself completely gay.
Last month I also found out that my dad is not all that comfortable with me being a gay furry. He says it's gross. I nearly cried... couldn't find any tears... they've been hiding for 5 years. He lied to me for a year and still tries to lie about it.

Coming out is a very hard and confusing thing, I'm not gonna lie. It was the single hardest thing I have ever had to do. But, when the time is right, you will know. The earlier the better as the longer you wait, the more self-esteem you lose and the more intense your depressions get. To all LGBs and related sexual orientations, I wish you luck. Big hug from me  You'll be okay.


----------



## Curagnaste (Apr 22, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> Our parents try to teach us how to tolerate others and be nice to people. Then it happens... they shun you they begin to not believe you, then they have to shut you down. Our parents are obsessed with becoming our worst enemies. Why? They come from a generation where power hunger is prominent. I haven't come out to my parents, but my mom says gays are icky and my dad says they're all girly. I can't stand it! The thought never comes to them, that I might be gay. It's never a possibility to them. When parents have a child they never think 'I wonder if my kid is going to be gay.' Society must have its eyes opened!


 my mom was abused as a child, and it made her never want others to suffer. She follows buddhist phylosophies and when I told her she asked how I was sure, I told her I've felt attracted to both sex's at times, and she went on being my mom as she usually is. I would hate to have parents like yours who are so unaccepting(can't say anything about my dad though, he left when I was 2 years old and we haven't even so much as recieved a letter from him)


----------



## Kanin (Apr 22, 2009)

Curagnaste said:


> my mom was abused as a child, and it made her never want others to suffer. She follows buddhist phylosophies and when I told her she asked how I was sure, I told her I've felt attracted to both sex's at times, and she went on being my mom as she usually is. I would hate to have parents like yours who are so unaccepting(can't say anything about my dad though, *he left when I was 2 years old and we haven't even so much as recieved a letter from him*)


 
That would explain another reason your mom was so excepting, you two are probably extremely close because of your dad.


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 22, 2009)

I believe I've come to a conclusion; I'm leaving a note on the counter-top tomorrow when I leave for school. I can't handle living as a lie anymore.
I'll get back with news on how it went, whatever house I may end up spending the night in.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 22, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I believe I've come to a conclusion; I'm leaving a note on the counter-top tomorrow when I leave for school. I can't handle living as a lie anymore.
> I'll get back with news on how it went, whatever house I may end up spending the night in.


Good luck... I hope all turns out well


----------



## Shindo (Apr 22, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I believe I've come to a conclusion; I'm leaving a note on the counter-top tomorrow when I leave for school. I can't handle living as a lie anymore.
> I'll get back with news on how it went, whatever house I may end up spending the night in.



hope you dont get disowned :>


----------



## Kanin (Apr 23, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I believe I've come to a conclusion; I'm leaving a note on the counter-top tomorrow when I leave for school. I can't handle living as a lie anymore.
> I'll get back with news on how it went, whatever house I may end up spending the night in.


 
Best of luck to you. And try and keep us updated.


----------



## Curagnaste (Apr 23, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> I believe I've come to a conclusion; I'm leaving a note on the counter-top tomorrow when I leave for school. I can't handle living as a lie anymore.
> I'll get back with news on how it went, whatever house I may end up spending the night in.


 really hope it goes wel, good luck


----------



## bearetic (Apr 23, 2009)

tired =_=



iBolt! said:


> I came across some bogus study that said if you masturbate to what you want to be attracted to, you will eventually be attracted to it by instinct. So I tried it...
> ...for two and a half years....
> ...no results.


I never had the discipline to try this when I was unaccepting of my own sexuality, but thanks for telling your story. It may have saved me a bit of frustration in case I felt tempted to try that again.



iBolt! said:


> More recently I have found myself completely gay.
> Last month I also found out that my dad is not all that comfortable with me being a gay furry. He says it's gross. I nearly cried... couldn't find any tears... they've been hiding for 5 years. He lied to me for a year and still tries to lie about it.
> 
> Coming out is a very hard and confusing thing, I'm not gonna lie. It was the single hardest thing I have ever had to do. But, when the time is right, you will know. The earlier the better as the longer you wait, the more self-esteem you lose and the more intense your depressions get. To all LGBs and related sexual orientations, I wish you luck. Big hug from me  You'll be okay.



Once again, your experiences help me in my future. I don't know if my parents are going to be like that, but it could happen.

And I'm happy for the good stuff that's happened to you. Thanks for the encouragement, as well!



Shindo said:


> whaaa?
> 
> 
> 
> ...



AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH RAAAAAAAGE ok I'm done raging now but it's still DUMB

Hopefully in time they'll smarten up. These things take time, and you've also got to be understanding of where they're at, as wrong as it seems.

I'll miss your cute avatar


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 23, 2009)

iBolt! - I'm glad you came out, I wish it went better, but congratulations!

If I would give advice to any other furries thinking about coming out as furries to their parents, though: don't come out unless you have to. It is important and a little bit of your parent's business I guess if you are gay, but if you are a furry? Unless it takes a large part of your life, like you draw it a lot or go to conventions, it would be good to tell, but if it is just some hobby/community thing you do on the computer and not much else, I really don't see the point. I think it is really just asking for them to feel weird about it because of all the stuff like the CSI episode.

So I think that coming out as furry hurt your parent's reaction. I think that if someone really has to come out as furry they don't emphasize the sexual aspect of it (like coming out as furry the exact time as you come out as gay and call yourself a "gay furry" instead of a "gay person who happens to be furry").

I am not trying to critisize you or anything, I am just trying to give a suggestion to others thinking about coming out as furry.

I am really sorry you had to go through all that depression, I hope things get better and your parents come around!



> Ceuper: I'm pretty sure I just found out that I'm gay.
> Load_Blown: How?
> Bunneh45: He took a blood test and it came out rainbow :grin:


I didn't think it was _that_ funny xD


----------



## CrispSkittlez (Apr 23, 2009)

Well, last night I spent half an hour writing up a note to leave when I went to school this morning.I found it difficult to write, my hands seemed to tense up whenever I began to write stuff down, but I was fortunately able to get through it.

I woke up an hour before I usually do this morning, unable to get back to sleep due to how nervous I was. Eventually, I got up, did what I usually do every morning, and left the note in an envelope on the stairs as I walked out the door. When I met up with my best friend and told him what I had just done, he was surprised, saying that I did the right thing, though I the time I wouldn't agree.

Went through the school day slightly quiet, worried about the announcements coming on telling me to come to the office for a message; nothing came, of course. I was slightly irritated all day, getting angry at people and quickly apologizing. I expected to be feeling like this.

The walk home was painful. I felt like I had just gotten a crappy report card to show to my parents. My friend kept reassuring me, saying it would all turn out alright, but could crash at his place if need be. His house is closer to the school than mine, but he walked all the way to my house before turning around to go home.

When I walked in the door, I was unsure of what to expect, so I just said, "Hello?"
Got a reply from my mum, and her voice showed no sign of anything unusual. I panicked briefly, wondering if my note had even been found, but it wasn't were I left it, so I took that as a good sign. I went upstairs and began to talk with my mother.
She had found the note, read it, and showed having absolutely no problem with me. We talked for a while, she asked a few questions, listened to me, never interrupting, but there were tears in her eyes, though her voice reflected no strain.

She is most likely going to talk to my step-father later, and we'll see what happens with my younger sister. Seeing as it's her birthday, I don't want it to seem as though I'm trying to take attention away from her. I'm planning on telling my dad next time I get a call from him, and we'll see how he handles it.

But I now feel happier than I've felt in a while, and somewhat encouraged by today's outcome. I'm thinking it's time for the rest of my close friends to know, and I'll keep on with the updates. Thanks for taking up your time to read and give feedback, you've all been a great help to me so far, whether or not you've actually said anything directed at me.


----------



## Curagnaste (Apr 23, 2009)

It's great that you managed to say it.


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## Shindo (Apr 23, 2009)

see isnt it easier when its off your chest

i might even go to a gay pride prom this month, but idk



character said:


> I'll miss your cute avatar


my cute avatar? its still here


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## Kanin (Apr 23, 2009)

Shindo said:


> my cute avatar? its still here


 
He was worried you might be off for a while.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 23, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> Well, last night I spent half an hour writing up a note to leave when I went to school this morning.I found it difficult to write, my hands seemed to tense up whenever I began to write stuff down, but I was fortunately able to get through it.
> 
> I woke up an hour before I usually do this morning, unable to get back to sleep due to how nervous I was. Eventually, I got up, did what I usually do every morning, and left the note in an envelope on the stairs as I walked out the door. When I met up with my best friend and told him what I had just done, he was surprised, saying that I did the right thing, though I the time I wouldn't agree.
> 
> ...


You know... you're a big inspiration... I'll have to tell my parents sooner or later. Might as well be sooner. They might not have an outlook of tolerant people, but maybe I'll change their minds. They told me yesterday that I'm a much better person than any of my sisters. I might complain about them, think they don't love me, but they do... I understand now, they do... I'll probably do something similar to your method. I might leave a letter in their mailbox.


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## Shindo (Apr 23, 2009)

in less then 2 weeks i've told all those who are close to me

is this a record?


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 23, 2009)

Shindo said:


> in less then 2 weeks i've told all those who are close to me
> 
> is this a record?


o.o Well I've been out to one person for a week and a half... I'm just unsure I'm brave enough to beat your record


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## bearetic (Apr 24, 2009)

CrispSkittlez said:


> *snip*


Great job, but maybe you should have waited until it wasn't your sister's birthday. Ah well, what's done is done. At least you came out!



ForestFox91 said:


> You know... you're a big inspiration... I'll have to tell my parents sooner or later. Might as well be sooner. They might not have an outlook of tolerant people, but maybe I'll change their minds. They told me yesterday that I'm a much better person than any of my sisters. I might complain about them, think they don't love me, but they do... I understand now, they do... I'll probably do something similar to your method. I might leave a letter in their mailbox.



DO IT FAGGOT (old 4chan meme, lol sorry)



Shindo said:


> in less then 2 weeks i've told all those who are close to me
> 
> is this a record?



haha you are fucking AWESOME


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## Revy (Apr 24, 2009)

Shindo said:


> in less then 2 weeks i've told all those who are close to me
> 
> is this a record?


 total domination >.<


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## CrispSkittlez (Apr 24, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> You know... you're a big inspiration... I'll have to tell my parents sooner or later. Might as well be sooner. They might not have an outlook of tolerant people, but maybe I'll change their minds. They told me yesterday that I'm a much better person than any of my sisters. I might complain about them, think they don't love me, but they do... I understand now, they do... I'll probably do something similar to your method. I might leave a letter in their mailbox.



I'm....  inspiring? That's a new one. Well, if you do go for it, keep us updated.


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## TheGreatCrusader (Apr 24, 2009)

The most infuriating thing is not knowing what you are. Not knowing if you're gay, bisexual, straight... I irritates me. I just wish I could tell the world to go fuck themselves anally with a cactus.


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 24, 2009)

So...you're irritated by yourself and you are angry at the rest of the world for it? Heh, I'm probably looking too deep into it; its just a bit funny.

Anyway, you can present your case to the fag supreme court and we can reach a verdict, if you like


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## TheGreatCrusader (Apr 24, 2009)

No, I'm angry at the whole world for caring about what I am. I'm angry because everyone thinks that everyone needs to be labeled about their sexuality. I'm angry because it matters. It shouldn't matter what I am. Does it make me any worse of a person? No. Does it make me ANY different? No.

Why can't I just be nothing, right now. I'm 15 years old. I don't want to 'be' anything sexually.


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## Curagnaste (Apr 24, 2009)

Shindo said:


> in less then 2 weeks i've told all those who are close to me
> 
> is this a record?


 You beat me by about a week.


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 24, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> No, I'm angry at the whole world for caring about what I am. I'm angry because everyone thinks that everyone needs to be labeled about their sexuality. I'm angry because it matters. It shouldn't matter what I am. Does it make me any worse of a person? No. Does it make me ANY different? No.
> 
> Why can't I just be nothing, right now. I'm 15 years old. I don't want to 'be' anything sexually.



Well, then don't.

That may seem a bit unhelpful but its really the only thing you can do. The world can try to label you (everyone labels everyone else as part of human nature) but don't label yourself. Understand that you don't _have_ to decide if you are unsure. In fact, it would be a bad idea to. If you don't feel comfortable labeling yourself, don't!

When it comes to outside labeling, its ok to lie about your sexuality and say you are straight if that makes you comfortable. If you had true friends they would understand if you told them later you lied about your sexuality because you were unsure or uncomfortable about it. If not, then they weren't worthy friends, obviously. 

Just don't start to lie to yourself.

One more time: don't feel pressured to label yourself to others or even yourself until you are comfortable, and sure about it.

Also, I agree you shouldn't have to be anything sexually at the age of 15. Some people don't figure out until they are an adult. I probably only found out this early (one year older than you) is because I'm a super fag I guess 

I hope you feel better


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## TheGreatCrusader (Apr 24, 2009)

It helped me understand it, but it didn't make me feel better. Everyone can still fuck themselves for trying to label me as something that I'm not.

I am also angry at people labeling my sexual uncertainty as bisexuality. They're not the same thing, you assholes.


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## TheRedRaptor (Apr 24, 2009)

An event from last year:
I wish I was given the oppitunity to 'come out' with my mum, but she comfronted me about a late night phone call that she overheard after my first date with Chris. "Love the Sinner and hate the Sin" was used against me by her. My mum also questioned my faith and judged me, but it is not the place to judge. She also doesn't want to know what he looks like.

I have never had any sexual enconters befor that date, nor am I attracted to either sex.  Yet I have a nice young man that can say "I love you" and truelly mean it. I also can say the same to him and not feel that I have told a lie.


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## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 24, 2009)

TheRedRaptor said:


> An event from last year:
> I wish I was given the oppitunity to 'come out' with my mum, but she comfronted me about a late night phone call that she overheard after my first date with Chris. "Love the Sinner and hate the Sin" was used against me by her. *My mum also questioned my faith and judged me, but it is not the place to judge.* She also doesn't want to know what he looks like.
> 
> I have never had any sexual enconters befor that date, nor am I attracted to either sex.  Yet I have a nice young man that can say "I love you" and truelly mean it. I also can say the same to him and not feel that I have told a lie.



"Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned." - Luke 6:37

I don't take too kind to those who judge me, but to point out your flaws in the meaning of constructive criticism is okay; builds character. 

Your fate lies on you man, just don't make the mistake to regret forever.


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## Kanin (Apr 24, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> No, I'm angry at the whole world for caring about what I am. I'm angry because everyone thinks that everyone needs to be labeled about their sexuality. I'm angry because it matters. It shouldn't matter what I am. Does it make me any worse of a person? No. Does it make me ANY different? No.
> 
> Why can't I just be nothing, right now. I'm 15 years old. I don't want to 'be' anything sexually.


 
I know how you feel.



Ark said:


> "Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned." - Luke 6:37
> 
> I don't take too kind to those who judge me, but to point out your flaws in the meaning of constructive criticism is okay; builds character.
> 
> Your fate lies on you man, just don't make the mistake to regret forever.


 
I'm so writing that quote down.


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## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 24, 2009)

Lord Kanin said:


> I'm so writing that quote down.



Just don't use in a belligerent way please.


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## Kanin (Apr 24, 2009)

Ark said:


> Just don't use in a belligerent way please.


 
I don't, I use quotes sparingly, I use them to add more meaning to something meaningful. It adds ethos. I just always forget where the quotes are from.


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## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 24, 2009)

Lord Kanin said:


> I don't, I use quotes sparingly, I use them to add more meaning to something meaningful. It adds ethos. *I just always forget where the quotes are from.*



I tend to have that problem too.

Okesh guys, continue on topic.


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## Kanin (Apr 24, 2009)

Ark said:


> I tend to have that problem too.
> 
> Okesh guys, continue on topic.


 
There's this one I've been trying to remember for a while, it's something like, "I may not agree with your way of life, but I would get my life for your right to live it." Any ideas on who that is?


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## Bellini Tabloid (Apr 24, 2009)

Lord Kanin said:


> There's this one I've been trying to remember for a while, it's something like, "I may not agree with your way of life, but I would get my life for your right to live it." Any ideas on who that is?



Sounds familiar, I'll get back to you on this quote (suspect a PM from me, later).


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## Shindo (Apr 25, 2009)

GAY PRIDE PROM is happening in less than 24 hours


i hope i meet someone, i could have my first date in 2 years, yeah im pathetic.


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## Vintage (Apr 25, 2009)

i really wish some of you dudes (generally speaking) would wait to come out until your parents can't kick you out of the house.  

protip:  if you have IRRATIONAL RAGEMACHINES for parents, don't come out to them until you're long gone!  every time i hear of some highschooler dude crashing on his buddy's couch because his parents couldn't handle him being gay it makes me a sad panda

also kudos all around for those of you who did and it went well

but i thought that went without saying


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## Takun (Apr 25, 2009)

Vintage said:


> i really wish some of you dudes (generally speaking) would wait to come out until your parents can't kick you out of the house.
> 
> protip:  if you have IRRATIONAL RAGEMACHINES for parents, don't come out to them until you're long gone!  every time i hear of some highschooler dude crashing on his buddy's couch because his parents couldn't handle him being gay it makes me a sad panda
> 
> ...



Ya, that'd be nice but really... having to put your life on hold for years because of parents sucks.  I wish I wouldn't have, but oh well.  It wasn't emotionally or physically healthy for me.


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## Vintage (Apr 25, 2009)

the below paragraph is full of obvious information, pardon me

yeah, it sucks but coming out to some pairs of parents is a risky task.  you risk them throwing you out if they're socially conservative enough.  i think the mere notion that a parent could discard their son or daughter over something this trivial is ridiculous and those who do it should be fucking ashamed of themselves.  you can't really change it, though, so all i can really ask is for people to be more discreet with who they tell, lest they wind up homeless.  this doesn't work for everyone (wow really???), but it did work for me (partly because i was a late bloomer, like i am with all things, and partly because i was #ifdefsexual and lacked any kind of social life because i was too busy with the pascal club but w/e )

if you can be yourself sexually and have all your needs met while living in an old refrigerator box you found out in the woods, go for it.  if you can't, it's best to wait for your emancipation and just don't let them look at your fucking twitter in the meantime! after that you can go to college; i hear there are a lot of gay people there!


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## bearetic (Apr 25, 2009)

Some may not have to wait
others may have to wait until college
others may have to wait until after college.
I can't imagine trying to go through med school and still not out @_@


----------



## iBolt! (Apr 25, 2009)

character said:


> tired =_=
> 
> 
> I never had the discipline to try this when I was unaccepting of my own sexuality, but thanks for telling your story. It may have saved me a bit of frustration in case I felt tempted to try that again.
> ...





Shindo said:


> GAY PRIDE PROM is happening in less than 24 hours
> 
> 
> i hope i meet someone, i could have my first date in 2 years, yeah im pathetic.



Don't feel bad. Been a little over a year here thus far... and I've dated an amazing 0 guys since I came out! Don't plan to look until I can fend for myself and not live off my parents' failures.


Sure thing ^^ If you wanna talk more about it, PM me. I'm not Oprah but I love playin her!


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## Ceuper (Apr 25, 2009)

The reason I'm pretty sure I'm gay is that since I've accepted and embraced that possibility I have landed a massive crush on a guy. I've never felt that way before. :3


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## Shindo (Apr 25, 2009)

dawww some one got a crush


----------



## Ceuper (Apr 25, 2009)




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## Shindo (Apr 25, 2009)

AHAHAAH nerd


----------



## Torrijos-sama (Apr 25, 2009)

Ceuper said:


>



SO KAWAII!!!11!1 Desu.


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## Ceuper (Apr 25, 2009)

I pressed that 'more emoticons' button like I hack mainframes, bitches.


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## Shindo (Apr 25, 2009)

i wish i knew some emoticons


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## Kanin (Apr 25, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> The reason I'm pretty sure I'm gay is that since I've accepted and embraced that possibility I have landed a massive crush on a guy. I've never felt that way before. :3


 


Ceuper said:


>


 
:twisted:


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## greg-the-fox (Apr 26, 2009)

Why is every guy I'm ever attracted to ever, straight? :V


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## Irreverent (Apr 26, 2009)

Wow.

Almost a thousand posts, carefully read and digested  over a weeks time.  Many informative, some tragic, some just downright funny and a few that champion human spirit and the human condition.  And interesting read, and one hell of an emotional ride.

And despite all this, I still don't have a clue.



Bunneh45 said:


> Some people don't figure out until they are an adult.



Being an adult doesn't make it any easier.  There's still risk, its just different risk.  I'm still struggling with who I am, probably always will.  And I'm not sure that's a bad thing.  While its good to be happy within your own skin (and I am, generally) it never hurts to occasionally re-evaluate the person we see staring back at us in the mirror.


----------



## Curagnaste (Apr 26, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> Why is every guy I'm ever attracted to ever, straight? :V


 maybe your naturally prone to trying to achieve something hard to get.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 26, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> The reason I'm pretty sure I'm gay is that since I've accepted and embraced that possibility I have landed a massive crush on a guy. I've never felt that way before. :3


Yeah, I got a crush on my best friend and realized after that.


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## greg-the-fox (Apr 26, 2009)

Curagnaste said:


> maybe your naturally prone to trying to achieve something hard to get.



Oh and they also always have a girlfriend


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 26, 2009)

Irreverent said:


> Being an adult doesn't make it any easier.  There's still risk, its just different risk.  I'm still struggling with who I am, probably always will.  And I'm not sure that's a bad thing.  While its good to be happy within your own skin (and I am, generally) it never hurts to occasionally re-evaluate the person we see staring back at us in the mirror.



Yeah, I was saying that to mean that some people take a long time to figure it out and eventually do later in their life, not that it is easier, although I do think that it would be a bit easier because you have more leg room to experiment.

I hope you can eventually figure yourself out, even though I am glad that you still are happy with yourself despite that


----------



## FurForCameron (Apr 26, 2009)

I have a plan to tell my folks that I'm an atheist/gay man later on in life. They're not very religious at all, and they never forced religion on me in any way, but if I tell them I'm gay and they say anything about God or Jesus, I'm going to say "I'm an atheist." Then what? Lol.

But seriously, I doubt they'll freak out. They may be shocked, but they told me a few days ago that I couldn't be anything they would be ashamed of. That made me more comfortable. But my friends do make fun of gays alot, and they're ALL christian and a few of them don't like me as much because I'm atheist. But it's going to be funny, because recently I just bought a ton of nice clothes, all bright colors like pink, purple, and turqoise for the Spring and summer, and thin jeans, and they're going to call me gay. That COULD be a good time, but still, not yet. (I'm also acting much more feminine, wonder if they notice?)


----------



## TheGreatCrusader (Apr 26, 2009)

Irreverent said:


> Being an adult doesn't make it any easier.  There's still risk, its just different risk.  I'm still struggling with who I am, probably always will.  And I'm not sure that's a bad thing.  While its good to be happy within your own skin (and I am, generally) it never hurts to occasionally re-evaluate the person we see staring back at us in the mirror.


I'm not happy with it. I'm confused and it's hurting me. People trying to label me as something that I'm not is hurting me. I don't want to ever feel like this. I just want to know what I am, not because I want to start looking for people, but so I can get this off my mind. I don't want to constantly be thinking about what and who I am. It's painful and depressing.


----------



## FanaticRat (Apr 26, 2009)

Man, this has been bugging me for the longest; although I realized I was bi only a little over a year ago, the truth is I've noticed I was...different since middle school. I'm still in the closet, mostly, and it's been really pulling me down as of late.

Well, I did come out to a few people: my brother and three of my friends (two of which came out to me!), and I'm thinking about telling one of my teachers (I'm pretty sure it'll go over well since she absolutely adores me and has gay friends), but other than that, it's all in the dark. I'm paranoid because a lot of my friends are only accepting of homosexuality when it's not in their faces...but most of all I'm concerned with two things: my family and my imminent trip to college.

I don't know what to do about my family. My mom is religious and, despite claiming to have gay friends, she isn't all that supportive of it, and it's impossible to reason with her. My dad is even worse. He is likewise religious but I'm on horrible terms with him right now (only person I've ever known who'd get angry and hit me because I asked him, "Where am I driving?" when he asked me to drive my step-mom someplace). Also, while he says he'd never disown me (claims that's a "white-people" thing), he has shown constant disapproval for homosexuality: he uses "fag" liberally, he sometimes makes homophobic jokes, and he doesn't believe there's such a thing as bisexuality. More annoying is that he's extremely dogmatic and impossible to reason with, and I'm afraid he'll just go off on me. Likewise, I'd have to tell him to his face; writing a letter or having him informed by proxy is no good, as he regards such indirect methods of communication as bitch moves and would only make me look like a coward (perhaps I am). My step-mother is more religious, and I doubt it'd go over well with her either. Then, if I do tell either of my parents, they'll tell my grandparents who I know aren't open to that kind of thing, and I fear they'll turn on me, which would hurt even worse since I love them very much. It seems like not being straight is not "a black thing", so to speak.

My second concern is college. Originally, I was planning on coming out once I got to college, but now that it's approaching in a few months the prospect has become more frightening. I mean, what if I ostracize myself? That's what I'm afraid of most, since I've been a social failure my whole school life and wanted college to be a fresh start. And I plan to have a roommate as well; what if he gets all uncomfortable that I'm bisexual and thinks I'm always checking him out? I just don't know what to do.


----------



## Kanin (Apr 26, 2009)

FanaticRat said:


> Man, this has been bugging me for the longest; although I realized I was bi only a little over a year ago, the truth is I've noticed I was...different since middle school. I'm still in the closet, mostly, and it's been really pulling me down as of late.
> 
> Well, I did come out to a few people: my brother and three of my friends (two of which came out to me!), and I'm thinking about telling one of my teachers (I'm pretty sure it'll go over well since she absolutely adores me and has gay friends), but other than that, it's all in the dark. *I'm paranoid because a lot of my friends are only accepting of homosexuality when it's not in their faces*...but most of all I'm concerned with two things: my family and my imminent trip to college.


 
The thing is it's not in there face, it truely doesn't effect them unless you start crushing on them.


----------



## Takun (Apr 26, 2009)

Irreverent said:


> Wow.
> 
> Almost a thousand posts, carefully read and digested  over a weeks time.  Many informative, some tragic, some just downright funny and a few that champion human spirit and the human condition.  And interesting read, and one hell of an emotional ride.
> 
> ...



Agreed.  I think it'd be damn near impossible.  If you have known someone for nearly 30 years... I don't know how you would tell them.


----------



## greg-the-fox (Apr 26, 2009)

My problem is, I've been in college a year already and I just put off coming out over and over again, it became a comfort to stay in the closet, a kind of protection. I've known people a year and they think I'm totally straight. I don't think the last 2 weeks of school would be a prime time to tell people. Should I just wait until the beginning of next year? And I don't know how to get myself to do it. I would be fine keeping it to myself but it's a serious drain on my emotional health, and something I need to deal with. Plus I haven't even sorted stuff out in my own mind yet. I just don't know where to start.


----------



## ForestFox91 (Apr 26, 2009)

I don't know how the last 2 weeks could be different than the beginning of next year. If you are comfortable coming out sooner, you might as well come out soon.


----------



## Bunneh45 (Apr 26, 2009)

I came out to my online non-IRL friends who are not furry. I had been jokingly gay for a long time, but never explicitly said it until this evening. None of them were too surprised even though I think they must have though I was joking all this time. So, I'm pretty happy about that but its nothing compared to coming out IRL. I really need to do that sometime -_-'



FurForCameron said:


> I have a plan to tell my folks that I'm an atheist/gay man later on in life. They're not very religious at all, and they never forced religion on me in any way, but if I tell them I'm gay and they say anything about God or Jesus, I'm going to say "I'm an atheist." Then what? Lol.
> 
> But seriously, I doubt they'll freak out. They may be shocked, but they told me a few days ago that I couldn't be anything they would be ashamed of. That made me more comfortable. But my friends do make fun of gays alot, and they're ALL christian and a few of them don't like me as much because I'm atheist. But it's going to be funny, because recently I just bought a ton of nice clothes, all bright colors like pink, purple, and turqoise for the Spring and summer, and thin jeans, and they're going to call me gay. That COULD be a good time, but still, not yet. (I'm also acting much more feminine, wonder if they notice?)



Why would you consider them friends if they don't like you because you are an atheist and you think they won't like it if you are gay? o_o

Have fun with the clothes, though. I'm an earth-tone person myself, so I would feel kind of weird in those colors xD



FanaticRat said:


> My second concern is college. Originally, I was planning on coming out once I got to college, but now that it's approaching in a few months the prospect has become more frightening. I mean, what if I ostracize myself? That's what I'm afraid of most, since I've been a social failure my whole school life and wanted college to be a fresh start. And I plan to have a roommate as well; what if he gets all uncomfortable that I'm bisexual and thinks I'm always checking him out? I just don't know what to do.



Unless you go to a Christian college, it shouldn't be a problem. Most colleges are very glbt friendly and any given college should have a glbt group of some sort if you need support.

Good luck



greg-the-fox said:


> My problem is, I've been in college a year already and I just put off coming out over and over again, it became a comfort to stay in the closet, a kind of protection. I've known people a year and they think I'm totally straight. I don't think the last 2 weeks of school would be a prime time to tell people. Should I just wait until the beginning of next year? And I don't know how to get myself to do it. I would be fine keeping it to myself but it's a serious drain on my emotional health, and something I need to deal with. Plus I haven't even sorted stuff out in my own mind yet. I just don't know where to start.



I would actually like coming out near the end of the year the best, because then by the time you come back next year your friends would be more used to it I guess, and also you are setting yourself up to have a new start of a sort next year, instead of having to come out at the beginning of a new year and starting off a bit weird.


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## TheRedRaptor (Apr 27, 2009)

I just wish my mother would accept what I have become.
For most of my life I was nonsexual. She has made it very hard to talk about it with her, so I have to ask my very Christian and understanding aunt to speak with mum on my behalf.

_Once something is broken it can not be made into what it was like before._


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## bearetic (Apr 27, 2009)

FanaticRat said:


> Man, this has been bugging me for the longest; although I realized I was bi only a little over a year ago, the truth is I've noticed I was...different since middle school. I'm still in the closet, mostly, and it's been really pulling me down as of late.
> 
> Well, I did come out to a few people: my brother and three of my friends (two of which came out to me!), and I'm thinking about telling one of my teachers (I'm pretty sure it'll go over well since she absolutely adores me and has gay friends), but other than that, it's all in the dark. I'm paranoid because a lot of my friends are only accepting of homosexuality when it's not in their faces...but most of all I'm concerned with two things: my family and my imminent trip to college.
> 
> ...



I'd come out from the get go in college. Of course, I'm not thinking about the possibility of your family finding out. Either way, it's best to start out honest with a bunch of total strangers. You might mention it only when appropriate, and not make it a big deal, just another part of you. No one there knows you. A great place to start.

As for anyone who won't be your friend because of that? Well, you can't please everyone. You're going to run into some people like that wherever you go. It's a part of being human. It's a part of being anything other than a doormat in life.

I don't know what to tell you about how to deal with your family. It sounds to me like there's the possibility of violence if you tell your dad, so be smart about that. And if you can remind them that you're still the same person you always were (the most important, big-picture things like trying to be a good person, working hard, etc. won't change), that might help.

All this is just one way of going about it. You should take time to figure it out for yourself, and this thread is a good place to come to. Study this subject as much as you can. Wait as long as you think you need to. Don't rush it.


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## xiath (Apr 27, 2009)

As of yet, I have not come out.  I do want to come out to them though.  I have been running how they would react 100s of times through my head and I have tentatively come to the conclusion that my father may actually be the most accepting of my family, but it will be rough at first, but would eventually be fine because he does not really put any restrictions on me and through conversations, have found out he doesn't care that I don't follow all of my mothers rules all of the time.

My mother would flip and do the "what have we done wrong" or "you are not gay!  you are just trying to fit in. (even though I don't know a gay person...)" or "you are are lost in sin and need professional help!" but I highly doubt disowning would even go into her mind thankfully.

My sister and her husband would most likely be the worst because they are the ones that go on the gay rants all the time and make constant gay jokes as well as being the most religious.

My little brother would be indifferent.

My grandmother on my fathers side would tell my parents to get me professional help to be 'cured'

My grandmother on my mothers side would not be happy about it, but would not be extreme about it.

My aunt and uncle on my mothers side would not be happy.

My aunt and uncle on my fathers side (my fathers side has many, but two are in the most contact with us) may not be all that happy about it, but they would not freak.

As you might know by that, my family is fairly religious, including myself but overall, it will not be a fun affair, but it will end up working out eventually.  I am not all that afraid of being forced into professional help.  I have decided that I will give it an honest try if they make me do it so as if it works (heh, yeah, right) life will be good, but if it doesn't work, I can say that I actually followed the instructions and it may work in my good by showing that gay is not something you can cure.

The only real bad thing would be that I would have to get new friends because almost all of them are extremely christian and beyond extremely homophobic (remember that thing with Mcdonalds promoting gay and them having the Christians boycott them?  Well, most of my friends refused to even go into a Mcdonalds parking lot while that was happening because they supported gays.)


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## greg-the-fox (Apr 27, 2009)

FurForCameron said:


> They may be shocked, but they told me a few days ago that I couldn't be anything they would be ashamed of



When parents say this type of stuff (out of the blue) it usually means that they know or strongly suspect that you're gay, or hiding something at least, and they want you to tell them.



Bunneh45 said:


> I would actually like coming out near the end of the year the best, because then by the time you come back next year your friends would be more used to it I guess, and also you are setting yourself up to have a new start of a sort next year, instead of having to come out at the beginning of a new year and starting off a bit weird.



I may do this, but I don't know how to bring the subject up. I feel like I have to make a big speech with this kind of thing :C


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## Zrcalo (Apr 27, 2009)

:/ I'd never tell my parents. never. ever. 
I'd more likely let them find out haphazardly or lead them on for a long time to where it wouldnt surprise them in the end.

and religion has no play in it. I'm still christian. what's the diff?


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## Ceuper (Apr 27, 2009)

Story:

Me: Hey, I have a crush! :3

Friend: Yeah, what's her name?

Me: Er, I'd rather wait until we're in person to tell you all about it...

Friend: Is it a dude?

Me: ... how the fuck? o_o;


He'd already been guessing for two years. Two years that I had a girlfriend, mind you. This is why he is my best friend.


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## greg-the-fox (Apr 27, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> He'd already been guessing for two years. Two years that I had a girlfriend, mind you. This is why he is my best friend.



:3 I once told an old friend of mine that I was bi, and she said "I knew it!" I then told her I was a furry. Once again she said "I knew it!" Now THIS freaked me out! Because the last time I talked to her, I was not yet a furry  WTFFFFFF..... Some people are just super perceptive I guess XD


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## Irreverent (Apr 27, 2009)

Takumi_L said:


> If you have known someone for nearly 30 years... I don't know how you would tell them.



Agreed.  It may never come to the point that I have to tell anyone.  And if it does, it may not be in the best interest to tell everybody, just a "needs to know" group of close people.   But I think the hard part will be to tell them that this is a recent thing, and to be believed as credible.  Stereotypes notwithstanding, its not a 30 year deception.  They may accept that better, or not.

I'm not the guy I was 30 years ago.  People change, tastes and preferences evolve and refine over time.  30 years ago it was Labatts Blue and cheap cigars.  Now its Becks beer (or Bit) and Montechristos.  Why should anyone's sexual preferences be any different?  And why would anyone care that they're not?


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## Revy (Apr 27, 2009)

How is it possible for one to say you're a furry, none of my friends knew till I told them


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## FanaticRat (Apr 27, 2009)

Thanks guys. I'm gonna stick with coming out once I hit college, although I do plan to test the waters a bit and find out if there's a good lgbt organization for support before I do, though. Although that kinda leads me to another question: what's the best way to find out how a person feels about homosexuality without drawing too much attention to yourself? It seems like asking them straight up, "What are your views on homosexuality?" would be a huge red flag.

Well, regardless, I think I'm going to go through with coming out to my teacher. I tried today but I couldn't get a time when we could be alone and I could tell her; guess I'll try again tomorrow.


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 27, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> Story:
> 
> Me: Hey, I have a crush! :3
> 
> ...


My friend had no idea I was gay until I told him... despite the fact I smacked him on the ass, asked to sit on his lap, and asked him sit with me on my front porch to watch the sun go down. He's so clueless and CUTE!


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## iBolt! (Apr 27, 2009)

So I've actually helped 4 people out of the closet... I've chatted alot on IM and run into some people really struggling with themselves on Yahoo! Answers, and now it appears I have outed 4 people just by helping them.

Today I ran into this really depressed person. He still wants to have a wife despite the fact he's gay, and he says he'd only do it so he can pretend to be straight. I really have a soft spot for people like this. Breaks my heart to hear their stories


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## Nookum_Squirrel (Apr 28, 2009)

To start things off, I'm 19 years old, male, and gay. I'm shy by nature, and just the idea of posting something that can be read by a large number of other people makes me feel very nervous. Although I'm just fine with who I am, things have not always been that way, and my life is a bit complicated at the moment. 

I live at home with my parents. They're the sort who don't like to be called republicans because the republicans are not far enough right for them. They're also very big into the Catholic religion. As far as they know, I'm just like them. 

I'm one of those people who feel like I was damaged by religion as a child. Up until two years ago, I was the exact image of everything I now hate. It was then that I finally admitted to myself that I'm gay, and despite what my father had told me about gays for my entire life, I was not a murderous pervert who got off on hunting down innocent male children and having my way with them. This helped me on my way to ending what I now see as the brainwashed fantasy I was taught to believe. That would be my former religion. 

I went to an all boy's high school, and my activities during that time involved band, and boy scouts (I know, sort of lame, but on the bright side I'm one of the few gay Eagle Scouts). My list of activities is pretty short, but that's mostly because I don't find a lot of pleasure in being around people. Most of the time, talking to to them makes me feel uncomfortable and nervous, so I keep to myself. For that reason, I don't think I would ever really want a relationship of any kind, so I currently have no plan to come out to anyone in my real life. 

Sometimes I find my situation a bit depressing, but it could be worse, and I do have one or two close friends who would have no problems with me if I chose to tell them, but since I don't plan on altering my life in any way, I don't feel a need to let them know just yet. The last thing I need is more complication, and trying to explain to my parents, people who voted for George Bush both terms, and mockingly laugh at the very idea of evolution, would only make my life more unpleasant. 


Oh, and I'm sorry to any people who might be offended by my comments about religion. It's something I feel very strongly about because of my own personal situation. I have no problem with people having their own beliefs.


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## bearetic (Apr 28, 2009)

It's OK. All furries are gay male atheists. :V


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## Novali (Apr 28, 2009)

Yeah...... I'm not coming out unless I end up with a women. Gender has no place in choosing my mate. So I'll just keep that hidden till then.

In two very memorable instances my mom has pseudo scared me.

We were watching a lifetime movie and a commercial came on for the next one. It was about lesbians. I guessed it. Then left the room. she came in a bit later..... "How did you know they were lesbians?" ..... "They acted like more than friends."

Her response. Staring at me, "If you ever do that crap I'll beat the gay out of you."

...........

Another time I was looking at the Home on the Range CD (Cow cartoon)

Mom read the back of it.... "K.D. Lang is in this, K.D. Lang is a fag. Thats not for you."

>_>;;;

Yeah.....

They will probably never know I'm a furry either.....

They might try to "Get me help."


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## TheRedRaptor (Apr 29, 2009)

character said:


> It's OK. All furries are gay male atheists. :V



That's crap.


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## TheGreatCrusader (Apr 29, 2009)

I'm an sexually confused male agnostic. >_>

BAAAWWWW AT CHARACTER FOR GENERALIZING ABOUT THE FANDOM


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## bearetic (Apr 29, 2009)

LOL IT WAS A JOKE GUYS and my name might change soon <_<

To Novali: I really have no advice for you, other than to be very careful. If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? Or are you 18 or older?


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## FanaticRat (Apr 29, 2009)

Argh, I haven't gotten the chance to come out to my teacher at all this week! Every time there's someone there, she's not there, or she has to leave soon for a meeting or something! I'm thinking of sending her an e-mail--in fact, I'm typing it right now--but now I'm hesitating. I mean, I know she's sympathetic to this kind of thing, but I'm still really worried. Is the timing off? Is it in bad taste? I don't know, but not saying anything is really eating at me...could I go another week?


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 29, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> My friend had no idea I was gay until I told him... despite the fact I smacked him on the ass, asked to sit on his lap, and asked him sit with me on my front porch to watch the sun go down. He's so clueless and CUTE!



HAWT xD


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## ForestFox91 (Apr 29, 2009)

FanaticRat said:


> Argh, I haven't gotten the chance to come out to my teacher at all this week! Every time there's someone there, she's not there, or she has to leave soon for a meeting or something! I'm thinking of sending her an e-mail--in fact, I'm typing it right now--but now I'm hesitating. I mean, I know she's sympathetic to this kind of thing, but I'm still really worried. Is the timing off? Is it in bad taste? I don't know, but not saying anything is really eating at me...could I go another week?


Trust me I hit that wall when coming out to my friend. Time isn't going to change anything. They'll have the same reaction now as they would later. I was happy that my friend still excepted me after I told him. I knew my friend wouldn't drop me if I told him, so I got up the courage and came out. Just tell your teacher, you'll feel so much better!


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## Belaza (Apr 29, 2009)

Ok firstly please don't have a go at me for posting here because I'm not sure to post this here or as a new topic. Firstly I'm not Bi or Gay not that I have anything against that, I was hoping this thread would answer some questions I had when I clicked on it.

The question I wanted help with was this:
Do I tell my parents about my attraction to anthropomorphic pictures?

also has anyone else told there parents something like this? and how did they react?


sorry again if this post should be elsewhere.


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## bearetic (Apr 29, 2009)

No and no. You're not the only one to ask this, though.

There's absolutely no need to tell your parents about your own private fetishes.

Now, if you're interested enough in the clean side, and want to tell them about it so you can go to a con or something like that, go ahead. Just hide the smut well and don't worry/play cool if anyone brings up the weird things furries do. (Someone more experienced might help you out with hiding porn, lol)

And here's something to think about, for your own personal sanity: they're called "anthropomorphic" for a reason. The human attribute is what makes them sexy. The animal part is just kinky


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## Xorin (Apr 30, 2009)

yeah, i hear you.  it came out, thankfully only to my parentals, and i am now "getting help".  i see myself as confused, with an appreciation of the male body and male sexuality.  i am finishing my undergrad now and plan on finally getting out of the parents house and getting some distance from the family.  i am hesitant to leave my friends, but i feel like i want to go somewhere where i would have a chance to start from a blank canvas. 
    i don't know though, at times it is just so frustrating.  being confused and liking guys.  i would be fine if i knew that i would never have contact with the family again so that i wouldn't feel their dissapointment and shame...


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## FanaticRat (Apr 30, 2009)

I blew it. I didn't have the balls to send the e-mail, and freaked out and deleted it once I heard my mom come in the front door (the computer's in her room, unfortunately). I won't be able to e-mail her this weekend 'cause I'll be at my dad's and he sees nothing wrong with reading my e-mails...won't be able to talk to her tomorrow...damn. I really can't wait for August.


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 30, 2009)

Belaza said:


> Ok firstly please don't have a go at me for posting here because I'm not sure to post this here or as a new topic. Firstly I'm not Bi or Gay not that I have anything against that, I was hoping this thread would answer some questions I had when I clicked on it.
> 
> The question I wanted help with was this:
> Do I tell my parents about my attraction to anthropomorphic pictures?
> ...



Noooooooo

Treat attraction to anthropomorphic creatures as if it is a BDSM or voyeurism fetish or something. Something you tell your best friends if you feel comfortable enough and of course your bf/gf but never ever your parents. They don't need to know. Ok?

Would you tell your parents you liked to lick people's feet? or that you like being watched while having sex? Of course not... same with an attraction to this stuff.

Its ok to show them the clean side, if you don't make a big deal out of it. If you tell them as if you are coming out, then they will definitely think you are weird, for good reason.


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## Erewolf (Apr 30, 2009)

I've been bi since I was 12 years old. I liked guys, and as a child I spent...maybe a little too much time on the internet and well of course I ran into porn when I was 12...Maybe younger idk >_>; But all I know is I started looking up lesbian porn, or just hawt chicks. At first I was like 'DUDE IT'S A PHASE OMGWTFBBQ' but at 13 I accepted it, and at 14 I came out. I'm no 16 and I don't care who knows...As long as it's not my family o__o;

My dad is the biggest homophobe...But then again I never tell them anything so ;D


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## Bunneh45 (Apr 30, 2009)

Erewolf said:


> I've been bi since I was 12 years old. I liked guys, and as a child I spent...maybe a little too much time on the internet and well of course I ran into porn when I was 12...Maybe younger idk >_>; But all I know is I started looking up lesbian porn, or just hawt chicks. At first I was like 'DUDE IT'S A PHASE OMGWTFBBQ' but at 13 I accepted it, and at 14 I came out. I'm no 16 and I don't care who knows...As long as it's not my family o__o;
> 
> My dad is the biggest homophobe...But then again I never tell them anything so ;D



I just want to clarify: if you are bi you have always been bi. You don't "become" bi or gay just like you can't decide to "become" straight. All you did was discover it.

I'm not trying to criticize or anything, I just hear a lot people say they "became" gay or bi and want to dispel that myth that you can choose what sexual orientation you can be because it is a major weapon of the religious-right and it is completely false.


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## Further (Apr 30, 2009)

ForestFox91 said:


> My friend had no idea I was gay until I told him... despite the fact I smacked him on the ass, asked to sit on his lap, and asked him sit with me on my front porch to watch the sun go down. He's so clueless and CUTE!



Oh wow lol <3


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## Timmy (May 1, 2009)

heh, dunno why I'm telling you all this but, oh well.

I have known since I was early 14 late 13. I'm 15 now and I'm not in denial, depression or anything imparticular. I seem to be lucky in the sense that, where I am, in my school, the general idea and rumor that goes round is that I am gay. No one dares ask me though, for some reason. If anyone does I deny it, but that's only because if anyone was to find out it is true, I'll get bullied or hated or whatever. I know I shouldn't be ashamed, and I'm not so don't tell me that. 
I've told a few of my close friends, and they of course weren't bothered, which goes against what we're brought up to believe: if you tell anyone you'll be hated (or something along those lines). I knew they would react the way they did, but at first I put off telling them just in case they did freak out. 

So now here I am. Well, if anyone could really be bothered to read the ramblings of a stranger, thank you. If anything useful is to come out of this is: It's different for everyone. Coming out all depends on where you live, who your friends are, the general view of homosexuality in your life and the life of those around you. Do it if you want to, hide if you want to, and if you want to talk, contact me (or maybe someone you feel comfortable talking too).


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## bearetic (May 1, 2009)

Therapy. Just to tell someone else is good medicine. Getting it off your chest.

And I can't believe the name "Timmy" wasn't taken!

- TIMMY!


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## Ceuper (May 1, 2009)

I have group therapy sessions lined up in the coming months. I'm excited about that; I've seen therapists but the one-on-one thing doesn't really help. I'm not really doing it because of the gay thing, but it would be nice to bring up.


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## iBolt! (May 1, 2009)

Bunneh45 said:


> iBolt! - I'm glad you came out, I wish it went better, but congratulations!
> 
> If I would give advice to any other furries thinking about coming out as furries to their parents, though: don't come out unless you have to. It is important and a little bit of your parent's business I guess if you are gay, but if you are a furry? Unless it takes a large part of your life, like you draw it a lot or go to conventions, it would be good to tell, but if it is just some hobby/community thing you do on the computer and not much else, I really don't see the point. I think it is really just asking for them to feel weird about it because of all the stuff like the CSI episode.
> 
> ...



I had to tell them I was a furry. I'd feel like there was still something on my chest I had to get off. Furry is my ONLY fetish as I do not find humans attractive.

My mom and sister are fine with it... but my mom tries to talk out her ass about it a little bit, suggesting Disney movies I should watch or labeling something "furry" to make me jump up and down or something... all she's doing is making me feel a bit awkward. My sister has a bad habit of listening to my dad.

My dad _wants_ to accept me and is trying hard to. I think he's okay with it, but doesn't want to hear about it at all... despite the fact that furry art, furry literature, furry communities, furry friends, and Yahoo! Answers is my life... I'm too poor to do much else, don't tease me xD


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 1, 2009)

Coming out as a furry when compared to coming out as gay is so insignificant in comparison it isn't even worth mentioning.


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## Bellini Tabloid (May 1, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> Coming out as a furry when compared to coming out as gay is so insignificant in comparison it isn't even worth mentioning.



Making it twice as hard, but it really helps you to be more outgoing I guess.


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## Bunneh45 (May 1, 2009)

iBolt! said:


> I had to tell them I was a furry. I'd feel like there was still something on my chest I had to get off. Furry is my ONLY fetish as I do not find humans attractive.
> 
> My mom and sister are fine with it... but my mom tries to talk out her ass about it a little bit, suggesting Disney movies I should watch or labeling something "furry" to make me jump up and down or something... all she's doing is making me feel a bit awkward. My sister has a bad habit of listening to my dad.
> 
> My dad _wants_ to accept me and is trying hard to. I think he's okay with it, but doesn't want to hear about it at all... despite the fact that furry art, furry literature, furry communities, furry friends, and Yahoo! Answers is my life... I'm too poor to do much else, don't tease me xD



Whatever floats your boat then, but don't blame them for thinking you are weird. How would you feel if your dad told you he like cross-dressing? I'm just saying that telling your parents about your parents kinda falls under TMI.

But, anyway, I hope they end up supporting your crazy fetish xD


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## Irreverent (May 1, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> Coming out as a furry when compared to coming out as gay is so insignificant in comparison it isn't even worth mentioning.



Absolute agreement.  But I can see the other side of the coin too.

I think there might be a certain "rip the bandage off" vs. "pull slowly" force multiplier to coming out "fury" at the same time.  One the tap is open, information flows in a torrent.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 1, 2009)

Yeah, just tell your parents everything they don't want to hear about you. Mom... I'm gay, I masturbate to anthropomorphic animal porn, I love getting having things shoved up my ass and I think I have herpes.


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## Irreverent (May 2, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> Yeah, just tell your parents everything they don't want to hear about you.



For some, venting might be helpful, liberating.  Its not for me, but I do see how it might work for some.


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## Ren-Raku (May 2, 2009)

I hate the way my friends keep thinking that Furry=Beastiality. *facepaw*


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## FanaticRat (May 2, 2009)

Yeah, I don't think I'd come out as furry unless I wanted to go to a convention, but it is kinda annoying that I can't even browse FA with mature content blocked when my parents are home, since the comp is in plain view of everything, although I may just be paranoid.

Also, I finally worked up the courage to e-mail my teacher and, after waiting anxiously for school the next day, found that she took it exceptionally well, brightening an otherwise crappy day. I feel so lucky!


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## Aaron Roger Scott (May 3, 2009)

I came out two years ago, rather uneventfully, and thought that I had been rather open about it since then. (My facebook status . . .)

When my friends decorated my locker for me, the first thing that was written was a scrawled "UR GHEY" by someone anonymous. I enclosed that in a sharpie heart, and my friend embellished it. I bought a rainbow bracelet on Friday, and I can't wait to unveil it at school on Monday. That will hopefully clear matters up.

I guess the moral is, when you're not the type to set off gaydars, you can't just come out of the closet. You're status has to be aggressively maintained. I'm getting a right ear helix piercing soon.


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## greg-the-fox (May 3, 2009)

Aaron Roger Scott said:


> I came out two years ago, rather uneventfully, and thought that I had been rather open about it since then. (My facebook status . . .)
> 
> When my friends decorated my locker for me, the first thing that was written was a scrawled "UR GHEY" by someone anonymous. I enclosed that in a sharpie heart, and my friend embellished it. I bought a rainbow bracelet on Friday, and I can't wait to unveil it at school on Monday. That will hopefully clear matters up.
> 
> I guess the moral is, when you're not the type to set off gaydars, you can't just come out of the closet. You're status has to be aggressively maintained. I'm getting a right ear helix piercing soon.



I don't think that's the way to go... if you don't act "gay", why would you want to make yourself closer to the stereotype? People who do that are just hurting our image overall. Just be yourself, seriously.


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## Shindo (May 3, 2009)

idk if i can come out as a furry, all my friends will get the wrong idea and think im a freak


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## Takun (May 3, 2009)

Aaron Roger Scott said:


> I came out two years ago, rather uneventfully, and thought that I had been rather open about it since then. (My facebook status . . .)
> 
> When my friends decorated my locker for me, the first thing that was written was a scrawled "UR GHEY" by someone anonymous. I enclosed that in a sharpie heart, and my friend embellished it. I bought a rainbow bracelet on Friday, and I can't wait to unveil it at school on Monday. That will hopefully clear matters up.
> 
> I guess the moral is, when you're not the type to set off gaydars, you can't just come out of the closet. You're status has to be aggressively maintained. I'm getting a right ear helix piercing soon.




Why...... why?

If you don't set off gaydars and that is who you are... why change that?  Why shove it in peoples faces?  We're working to be equal, not HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT ME!!!!!1111111


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## noodlescoop (May 3, 2009)

Silibus said:


> My story:
> 
> I was straight. I started noticing attractive guys, but still liked girls. Thought about it for a long while. And now im bi.



same as above, but will add the fact that there were also alot of games of truth or dare that helped in the manner, also i decided one day to look at gay yiff and so yeah now im bi


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## Bunneh45 (May 3, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> I don't think that's the way to go... if you don't act "gay", why would you want to make yourself closer to the stereotype? People who do that are just hurting our image overall. Just be yourself, seriously.



Maybe that is who he is like?

Even if it isn't, fitting the gay stereotype and being proud about it, even if it isn't who he is, is something that helps him, and a lot of other people, out. He'll settle down eventually.

And anyway, fuck protecting the gay image. Who the hell cares about the gay image. Don't keep yourself from being proud just because it hurts the gay "image".



noodlescoop said:


> same as above, but will add the fact that there were also alot of games of truth or dare that helped in the manner, also i decided one day to look at gay yiff and so yeah now im bi



Again, you didn't "become" bi, you have always been bi, you just realized it. I'm just making sure its understood, not meant as a criticism.


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## Aaron Roger Scott (May 3, 2009)

> Why...... why?
> 
> If you don't set off gaydars and that is who you are... why change that? Why shove it in peoples faces? We're working to be equal, not HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT ME!!!!!1111111


 


> I don't think that's the way to go... if you don't act "gay", why would you want to make yourself closer to the stereotype? People who do that are just hurting our image overall. Just be yourself, seriously.


 
I don't think I'll ever have to act "gay" for other people's benefit. At the same time, it's perfectly practical for me to want other people to know that I'm gay. I'll get my piercing, and wear my barcelet, and act exactly the same way that I have been. And then, I'll be helping the gay image because people will know that I can be gay, and not excessively feminine or flamboyant.


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## bearetic (May 3, 2009)

Silibus said:


> My story:
> 
> I was straight. I started noticing attractive guys, but still liked girls. Thought about it for a long while. And now im bi.



Even though old post is old, I'd like to quote this and reverse it.



Shindo said:


> idk if i can come out as a furry, all my friends will get the wrong idea and think im a freak



I don't care too much. I'm already weird, and I don't like hiding myself. If I start saying "I'm not going to ever talk about this or that", then I won't have anything to talk about, and I wouldn't really be being myself.



Bunneh45 said:


> Maybe that is who he is like?
> 
> Even if it isn't, fitting the gay stereotype and being proud about it, even if it isn't who he is, is something that helps him, and a lot of other people, out. He'll settle down eventually.
> 
> ...



I'll tie the gay image thing in with furry image or furry stigma. I just don't give a shit. I'll be who I am and that's my contribution. Kind of like making the world a better place just by being in it.

About changing sexualities: I'm not the type to make conclusive statements on something I don't fully understand, and I also never say never. Change MAY BE possible. I'm not talking about the way that anti-gay people think. It MAY BE possible, but there's too small of a chance, or it's too difficult to be worth the hassle.

Also, I'd guess these things can happen naturally. If I got the story straight (lol pun), that happened to Irreverent, and he posted about it within the past one or two pages.

ANYTHING'S POSSIBLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dk7Il3EqI0


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 3, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> I don't think that's the way to go... if you don't act "gay", why would you want to make yourself closer to the stereotype? People who do that are just hurting our image overall. Just be yourself, seriously.


My thoughts exactly. All you're doing is reinforcing gay stereotypes, which is bad.


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## Ceuper (May 3, 2009)

Well I just inadvertently came out to my parents on facebook, apparently. >.<


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## Xaerun (May 3, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> Well I just inadvertently came out to my parents on facebook, apparently. >.<


Really? Heh, how'd that happen?


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## Shindo (May 3, 2009)

Xaerun said:


> Really? Heh, how'd that happen?



the furry group on facebook


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## Ceuper (May 3, 2009)

Xaerun said:


> Really? Heh, how'd that happen?



I JUST changed my interested in to 'Men' next thing I know my mom comes to my door all "So Dad says you're coming out as a gay person?". 

I was going to tell them relatively soon but God DAMN. Not like that. -_-  They don't give a shit, anyway.

EDIT: If that wasn't clear enough basically my Dad was nosing around my facebook. Yes, both my parents are on there and I have them as friends.


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## Kanin (May 3, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> Well I just inadvertently came out to my parents on facebook, apparently. >.<


 
I told you someone you didn't want to know would see.


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## Ceuper (May 3, 2009)

Oh, no, I couldn't care less except by the method in which my parents now know. I was looking forward to something a bit more... sentimental. You know, family dinner, I could write a short speech. Coming out presents. Stuff like that.


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## Xaerun (May 3, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> I JUST changed my interested in to 'Men' next thing I know my mom comes to my door all "So Dad says you're coming out as a gay person?".
> 
> I was going to tell them relatively soon but God DAMN. Not like that. -_-  They don't give a shit, anyway.
> 
> EDIT: If that wasn't clear enough basically my Dad was nosing around my facebook. Yes, both my parents are on there and I have them as friends.



Wow. That's... kinda funny, I'll admit.
I was considering changing my "Interested In" but yeah, I'm kinda worried about that sort of thing happening (not with my parents though, they don't have Facebook).


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## Bunneh45 (May 3, 2009)

character said:


> About changing sexualities: I'm not the type to make conclusive statements on something I don't fully understand, and I also never say never. Change MAY BE possible. I'm not talking about the way that anti-gay people think. It MAY BE possible, but there's too small of a chance, or it's too difficult to be worth the hassle.
> 
> Also, I'd guess these things can happen naturally. If I got the story straight (lol pun), that happened to Irreverent, and he posted about it within the past one or two pages.
> 
> ...



Yeah, but thats kind of a silly thing to even care about. Winning the lottery is possible, but is it probable? Of course not.

The fact is, most marriages after "changing" from gay to straight don't last very long and many many "ex-gays" councilors end up being found in gay bars or just quitting because its useless and pointless.



Ceuper said:


> Well I just inadvertently came out to my parents on facebook, apparently. >.<



Oh no! I hope they took it well. :|

This is a great example of how you should be careful about what information about yourself you put on the internet. It can get anywhere, and things can come back to haunt you. If something is put on the internet, google has found it, cached it, and will let other people find it.



TheGreatCrusader said:


> My thoughts exactly. All you're doing is reinforcing gay stereotypes, which is bad.



Dude, he's happy doing what he wants to do, let him. Don't fucking tell people not to do something that makes them happy just because it hurts some "image".

Why does it fucking matter what the "gay image" is? Don't bow down to religious-right and stop yourself from doing what you want to do just because of an image. Do whatever is best for you.

Now, I honestly don't think what he is doing is best for him, but it won't hurt anyone as long as the school he goes to is safe enough. He'll probably realize that he doesn't want to be super-gay and all that at some point.

But don't bring up the "gay image" in this.


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## greg-the-fox (May 3, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> Well I just inadvertently came out to my parents on facebook, apparently. >.<



Lol I did that once (came out on facebook) back when I didn't have many friends added on there, mainly close ones. Really positive results from that btw. But I changed my "interested in" back to blank and added many many more people, so now I'm in the closet again >>


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## Ceuper (May 3, 2009)

I actually figured my dad might find it. I didn't care. I just talked to both of them and came out fully. They were like "okay". 

I'm traumatized for life, guys. /wrists


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## Aaron Roger Scott (May 3, 2009)

OK. I'm making this clear, before moving on. I do not act excessively "gay", flamboyant, or feminine, nor do I plan to. I plan to wear a bracelet, saying that I'm gay. Those are two very different things.

And I can feel for Mr. Facebook status. I sort of wish that my coming out had a little more drama . . . it was really uneventful. I was disapointed. I suppose in 20 years, nobody will know what 'coming out' really means.


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## FanaticRat (May 3, 2009)

But then again, don't we wish for our coming out to be uneventful?


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## bearetic (May 3, 2009)

Ceuper said:


> Well I just inadvertently came out to my parents on facebook, apparently. >.<



Well, did you hide the story from the stalker feed when you changed your status? That probably gave it away. From what you've told us, though, it sounds like they're ok with it 

I don't do it because I'm still dealing with my immediate family, much less my extended family that's on facebook.

And yet my religion says atheist. 



Bunneh45 said:


> Yeah, but thats kind of a silly thing to even care about. Winning the lottery is possible, but is it probable? Of course not.
> 
> The fact is, most marriages after "changing" from gay to straight don't last very long and many many "ex-gays" councilors end up being found in gay bars or just quitting because its useless and pointless.



Exactly.



FanaticRat said:


> But then again, don't we wish for our coming out to be uneventful?



Exactly.



character said:


> Exactly.



Exactly.


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## Bunneh45 (May 3, 2009)

FanaticRat said:


> But then again, don't we wish for our coming out to be uneventful?



Well, yeah, but at least I want a little more than, "ok". Right now, with all the homophobia, just "ok" doesn't really cut it. Gay people need support in addition to acceptance.


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## Kryn (May 4, 2009)

Yeah I have the feeling if I came out to my family they wouldn't really care to my face. But If I brought a boy home with me they would probably flip :|


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## greg-the-fox (May 4, 2009)

Hmm, my parents know I'm bi at least (I haven't told them I'm gay because I'm not quite sure of it yet) but my brother still doesn't know. He's 13 and I'm wondering how his age will affect things. He's pretty mature when it comes to this stuff though, his best friend came out as bisexual and they're really close. But I think maybe he might be too young to tell, I just think the relationship between brothers is different than between friends. I'm not really that close to him actually, we mainly just joke around and fight, I feel weird about discussing this kind of thing with him because of the seriousness of it, and also because I think he looks up to me. I really want to though so I can be open around my family, and not just when my brother isn't around.


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## Bunneh45 (May 4, 2009)

greg-the-fox said:


> Hmm, my parents know I'm bi at least (I haven't told them I'm gay because I'm not quite sure of it yet) but my brother still doesn't know. He's 13 and I'm wondering how his age will affect things. He's pretty mature when it comes to this stuff though, his best friend came out as bisexual and they're really close. But I think maybe he might be too young to tell, I just think the relationship between brothers is different than between friends. I'm not really that close to him actually, we mainly just joke around and fight, I feel weird about discussing this kind of thing with him because of the seriousness of it, and also because I think he looks up to me. I really want to though so I can be open around my family, and not just when my brother isn't around.



Wow I think 13 is plenty old enough, I think it would be fine, as long as you are comfortable.


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## TheRedRaptor (May 4, 2009)

Just what is the so called "Gay Look"?
Chris and I look and act straight. Some people I know were very supprised when I sort of came out, I don't look or behave like the stereotypical "Gay".


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## ForestFox91 (May 4, 2009)

Well I'm back from my band trip to fabulous San Diego. I fell in love with the city, I plan on moving there sometime! A lot happened which is why I love the city. So anyway, my friend and I spent the whole time together. I lost my glasses at the beach. They are probably in Japan by now. There was a freshman girl that kept flirting with me at the In-n-Out Burger. My friend and I laughed our heads off at the fact that girls started flirting with me as soon as I came out to him. I got flirtatious with him at the pool. He grabbed my ass by accident. I had mistaken it as him getting fresh with me. I got bummed out. We went on a sea port tour on a small vessel. We sang the song "I'm on a Boat" by Lonely Islands. We had some awesome gyros at the Greek cafe at the "Seaport Village." We took an interesting tour of the USS Midway.
So that was a summary of the trip. I'm so glad he accepts me as a friend still. I'm gonna post some pictures from the trip later!


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## iBolt! (May 4, 2009)

This one just made me LOL!!!

Sister: "You got hairy nipples!"
Mom: "Because he's a furry!"

0_o


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## ForestFox91 (May 4, 2009)

iBolt! said:


> This one just made me LOL!!!
> 
> Sister: "You got hairy nipples!"
> Mom: "Because he's a furry!"
> ...


I mooned  four of my friends once and my best friend said that about my hind quarters. It startled me to say the least.


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## FanaticRat (May 4, 2009)

TheRedRaptor said:


> Just what is the so called "Gay Look"?
> Chris and I look and act straight. Some people I know were very supprised when I sort of came out, I don't look or behave like the stereotypical "Gay".



Y'know, I've been wondering about this too. I dunno; I do have some effeminate mannerisms but it's more of a result of my eccentricity than my sexuality and most people don't suspect that I'm bi...or at least, they don't tell me that they suspect it.


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## Irreverent (May 4, 2009)

FanaticRat said:


> it's more of a result of my eccentricity than my sexuality and most people don't suspect that I'm bi...



A carefully cultured, crafted and well maintained eccentricity is a godsend.  Its like camouflage for your life.  I use it to "hide" things in plain site all the time.  Because things in plain sight aren't really hidden, are they?   Always amusing when someone finally cracks the code.  "Hey, I didn't know you were into that!"  "Oh, I've been into _that_ for years..."


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## PriestRevan (May 4, 2009)

Irreverent said:


> *A carefully cultured, crafted and well maintained eccentricity is a godsend*. Its like camouflage for your life. I use it to "hide" things in plain site all the time. Because things in plain sight aren't really hidden, are they? Always amusing when someone finally cracks the code. "Hey, I didn't know you were into that!" "Oh, I've been into _that_ for years..."


 
Not really.


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## Revy (May 4, 2009)

well finally my friend who id almost given up on finally wants to go out with me this coming weekend yay!

Funny how a string of texts messages wittle down to something along the lines of "So what are you doing saturday night?"


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## PriestRevan (May 4, 2009)

TheGreatCrusader said:


> Coming out as a furry when compared to coming out as gay is so insignificant in comparison it isn't even worth mentioning.


 
Have I ever mentioned about how much I love you?


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## ForestFox91 (May 4, 2009)

Aaron Roger Scott said:


> OK. I'm making this clear, before moving on. I do not act excessively "gay", flamboyant, or feminine, nor do I plan to. I plan to wear a bracelet, saying that I'm gay. Those are two very different things.
> 
> And I can feel for Mr. Facebook status. I sort of wish that my coming out had a little more drama . . . it was really uneventful. I was disapointed. I suppose in 20 years, nobody will know what 'coming out' really means.


I hope soon no one has to 'come out'  so that people can be open about it and not be discriminated about it.


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 5, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Have I ever mentioned about how much I love you?


Not until now you haven't. >_>


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## Irreverent (May 5, 2009)

PriestRevan said:


> Not really.



Why?

Personally, I find it cuts down on a lot of static, chatter and noise, especially with extended and distant family.  And there's different types of eccentricity.  We're not talking about the kind that wears socks with Crocs (tm)


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## Takun (May 5, 2009)

Irreverent said:


> Why?
> 
> Personally, I find it cuts down on a lot of static, chatter and noise, especially with extended and distant family.  And there's different types of eccentricity.  We're not talking about the kind that wears *socks with Crocs *(tm)



Why you got to go and do that.

|:C


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## matt561 (May 5, 2009)

Erm ok question guy's:

How many straight furs are there?

Including myself i've only ever met one.... i feel lonely


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## Takun (May 5, 2009)

matt561 said:


> Erm ok question guy's:
> 
> How many straight furs are there?
> 
> Including myself i've only ever met one.... i feel lonely



Polled in the 2009 on going study.

Completely heterosexual 1182 _(22.38%) _ 
Mostly heterosexual 924 _(17.5%) _ 
Bisexual leaning heterosexual 637 _(12.06%) _ 
Bisexual, no skews 750 _(14.2%) _ 
Bisexual leaning homosexual 517 _(9.79%) _ 
Mostly homosexual 681 _(12.9%) _ 
Completely homosexual 590 _(11.17%) _ *TOTAL*​5281 _(100%) _
http://www.klisoura.com/ot_furrysurvey.php


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## matt561 (May 5, 2009)

makes me feel slightly better bout myself

Was feeling like Daffyd Thomas but the other way around


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## PriestRevan (May 5, 2009)

Irreverent said:


> Why?
> 
> Personally, I find it cuts down on a lot of static, chatter and noise, especially with extended and distant family. And there's different types of eccentricity. We're not talking about the kind that wears socks with Crocs (tm)


 
It does. But it's nothing to be impressed with.


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## Jonnaius (May 8, 2009)

I know this isnt technically part of this whole discussion, but is being attracted to about 90% of people you meet normal? And when i say attracted, I mean not just finding them attracted, but....damn, I can't phrase it. In laymans terms, I fancy everyone i meet. Is this normal? I hope to god its just hormones, cos damn it is annoying.


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## bearetic (May 8, 2009)

Lots and lots of sex. Clearly, that's the answer.

I'm no expert, but I'd guess if you're really young that might be a reason. Or, that's just the way you were made.
Congratulations. You're going to pass on lots of genes


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## SnowFox (May 8, 2009)

I heard





character said:


> Lots and lots of sex


from across the forum. Hi Jonnaius <3 doing anything this weekend? :wink:


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## Bellini Tabloid (May 8, 2009)

Gay orgy, anyone =3


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## TheGreatCrusader (May 8, 2009)

Jonnaius said:


> I know this isnt technically part of this whole discussion, but is being attracted to about 90% of people you meet normal? And when i say attracted, I mean not just finding them attracted, but....damn, I can't phrase it. In laymans terms, I fancy everyone i meet. Is this normal? I hope to god its just hormones, cos damn it is annoying.


It's quite possible that you are a pansexual. Read up on it.


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## Corto (May 20, 2009)

Un-sticking. The new thread has been up for a while.


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