# Anybody read the twilight series here?



## EmoWolf (Jan 14, 2009)

Who's team are you on? (I think this vote going to be so unfair.)
As for me, just look at my sig for your answer.


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## Lukar (Jan 14, 2009)

ZOMG I lurves Twilight. <3 I only managed to read half of the first book, though, and watch the movie. x.x' I'm gonna read the series more eventually- I already have New Moon, lol.

And yeah, Jacob pwns Edward in every fucking way.


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## WolfTailz (Jan 14, 2009)

I have yet to read that series. I am trying to get the book XD


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## NeoEevee (Jan 14, 2009)

I dun like it. =p 

But Jacob is one of the few-and-far-between redeeming qualities and even he was butchered in Breaking Dawn. 

..[size=-1]Team Tyler's Van ftw..[/size]


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## VVhiteWolf (Jan 14, 2009)

My sister read the first book and she said she liked it. She said the movie sucked, and after the movie she read the other books, which she said were bad because the movie put stuff in her head that was totally wrong with how she thought of it in the first book.


AKA; book > movies

There has been like, 2 occasions where the movie was better, and I can't even remember.


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## EmoWolf (Jan 14, 2009)

The only part I LOVED in the last book was when Jacob was telling the story. It was so cool to see how his pack worked.
It's too bad he only had like 1/4 of the book to himself. I wish S.Meyer would write from his perspective if she continues with the series.


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## Oidhche-Yorath (Jan 14, 2009)

http://i44.tinypic.com/14ubdw8.jpg


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## AlexInsane (Jan 14, 2009)

Fail series is fail.

Even more fail than Harry Potter or that Series of Unfortunate Emo Bullshit Things.


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## Oidhche-Yorath (Jan 14, 2009)

I think the series should be renamed: When Mary Sue meets Gary Stu


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## pheonix (Jan 14, 2009)

AlexInsane said:


> Fail series is fail.
> 
> Even more fail than Harry Potter or that Series of Unfortunate Emo Bullshit Things.



^this

I hate the author and the way she writes, I didn't get far into this book before dropping it and shoving my finger down my throat in disgust.


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## Trpdwarf (Jan 14, 2009)

Personally I don't like the book. The writing is mediocre. It belongs on Fanficiton.net that is how bad it is to me. The author did not even bother research the Vampire Mythos...and even if it is fictional...vampires that is, they still have a huge history behind them that you cannot decide to deviate completely from and still call the creation vampires.

There is something people need to realize, especially Stephanie Meyers....that when you are going to use a word associated with an entire centuries old mythos...to describe the race of your characters you need to do you research. J.K. Rowling did that well in her body but Meyers didn't. You don't call her characters vampires. It's like, you don't call flesh eating corpses mermaids, you don't call giant winged reptilian things werewolves, and you don't call half human half fish people sirens. Every single of these terms have preset things attached to them that are inflexible. They do not change. So what she did was not creaitivity but a pure cop out, in my opinion.

The characters are all shallow. Bella is a Mary Sue. Edward is a Gary Stue. Beyond that the book teaches that Pedophilia, Stalking, Mental and Physical abuse, shallowness, and racism are all good things.

So yeah, you can tell what side I am on right? The darksiders. If people like the book I have no problem at all with that. Just don't be a crazy fan-girl/fan-boy and all is good. You don't have to go beserk the moment someone admits to not liking the book, and you should learn to tolerate opinions that go against your own. Doing that will make people respect you more even though you admit to liking a book that many people consider dogcrap.


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## Ozriel (Jan 14, 2009)

The hack of a writer took her wet dream of being fucked by a vampire and decided to profit over it by carrying it to the masses of Teenybopper Zombies and Dry Cunt desperate housewives. The Writing is below par, the main characters have less personality than dog crap, and she sends the Thesaurus to the grave describing how much Edward sparkles, animation, brilliance, coruscation, dash, dazzle, Ã©lan, flash, flicker, gaiety, gleam, glimmer, glint, glitz, glow, life, panache, radiance, scintillation, shimmer, show, spark, spirit, twinkle, vim, vitality, vivacity, zap, zip, etc.

Oh, we cannot forget a certain author has also had Jacob, the most developed character imprint on a baby, and Smeyer's excuse is the demon spawned mutant chest buster that Sparklepoo chewed out of Mary sue's womb that technically shouldn't exist..

I could go on for ages on how the series that was one in a total of 4 years fails

She bastardizes an age old mythos while inserting some morals that aren't accepted in society today. 

Team darkside... We have cookies

Tl;Dr version


PURGE THE CANCER!!!


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## AlexInsane (Jan 14, 2009)

*Re: Anybody read the twilight series herehttp://forums.furaffinity.net/newreply.php??*



Oidhche-Yorath said:


> I think the series should be renamed: When Mary Sue meets Gary Stu



OMG GARY STU:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBhUWjQAJYE


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## Oidhche-Yorath (Jan 14, 2009)

Trpdwarf said:


> Personally I don't like the book. The writing is mediocre. It belongs on Fanficiton.net that is how bad it is to me. The author did not even bother research the Vampire Mythos...and even if it is fictional...vampires that is, they still have a huge history behind them that you cannot decide to deviate completely from and still call the creation vampires.
> 
> There is something people need to realize, especially Stephanie Meyers....that when you are going to use a word associated with an entire centuries old mythos...to describe the race of your characters you need to do you research. J.K. Rowling did that well in her body but Meyers didn't. You don't call her characters vampires. It's like, you don't call flesh eating corpses mermaids, you don't call giant winged reptilian things werewolves, and you don't call half human half fish people sirens. Every single of these terms have preset things attached to them that are inflexible. They do not change. So what she did was not creaitivity but a pure cop out, in my opinion.
> 
> ...


I elaborated on all of this in an Editorial I wrote recently. Although you forgot the rabid fangirls that have taken to destructive behavior, such as self inflicting wounds to bleed when they meet the movie actor, to destroying the book in a "fit of passion", to having sex because "It's what Bella says young girls want", to downright disgusting things as old housewives asking the young actors what underwear they wear if any at all.


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## Internet Police Chief (Jan 14, 2009)

No, it's shitty.

God, I don't understand why it's so damn popular.


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## Dayken (Jan 14, 2009)

Edit: Nevermind, I had nothing of merit to say here.


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## Aden (Jan 14, 2009)

My sister loves the series. I asked her why. She couldn't give me an answer.


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## AlexInsane (Jan 14, 2009)

Aden said:


> My sister loves the series. I asked her why. She couldn't give me an answer.



I asked one of my female friends that too.

She said "[the books] make me moist."

At that point, part of my brain lit itself on fire and killed itself, due to being unable to cope with the mental imagery of this.


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## Captain Howdy (Jan 15, 2009)

My sister has read the series twice, seen the movie four times.

Know what the screams in my mind?

SOMETHING IS WRONG.

So I avoid it like the plague. Hell, I even bothered to make a rule about it - Lame as it may be, I have too many females around me gushing over it. You just chug a beer, or pound a straight shot when anything related to the book/movie is mentioned. 

So chug a beer when Twilight is mentioned. At school, at work, at home. It's fun for everybody, and if the conversation is long, then you get to get shitfaced.


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## AlexX (Jan 15, 2009)

My, furries are so fast to begin the smacking-laying in a downward direction anytime someone has a differing opinion on things... Then again, I never saw the Twilight series and actually never heard about it until someone posted about it here.


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## Aden (Jan 15, 2009)

AlexX said:


> My, furries *people on the internet* are so fast to begin the smacking-laying in a downward direction anytime someone has a differing opinion on things



FTFY.


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## Ozriel (Jan 15, 2009)

Lastdirewolf said:


> My sister has read the series twice, seen the movie four times.
> 
> Know what the screams in my mind?
> 
> ...



My rule is:
Each time someone asks or if it is mentioned, I shoot a copy of the book.

I heavily dislike the book for reasons that it is a bad book, worse than Eragon. 
I hate the fangirls. I was tempted to use my GOD powers at work when a patron was on the computer with admin messages. 

oh yes...fangirl attacks. The last time I see a fat faced lynch mob chase me again will be a cold day in hell. 

if you want a Lynch Mob of twifail, follow these steps:

1.Go into HT
2. Go to the Twilight section where they have ther Merchandise. make sure it is surrounded by fangirls

3. Say how much it sucks and harry potter (or any book) is better
4. ???
5. PROFIT! (and run)


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## Ozriel (Jan 15, 2009)

Oidhche-Yorath said:


> I elaborated on all of this in an Editorial I wrote recently. Although you forgot the rabid fangirls that have taken to destructive behavior, such as self inflicting wounds to bleed when they meet the movie actor, to destroying the book in a "fit of passion", to having sex because "It's what Bella says young girls want", to downright disgusting things as old housewives asking the young actors what underwear they wear if any at all.



You cannot forget the obsessive behavior of becoming Twilight "fictokin".


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## EmoWolf (Jan 15, 2009)

AlexX said:


> My, people on the internet are so fast to begin the smacking-laying in a downward direction anytime someone has a differing opinion on things.



Much better.


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## Gavrill (Jan 15, 2009)

Zeke Shadowfyre said:


> if you want a Lynch Mob of twifail, follow these steps:
> 
> 1.Go into HT
> 2. Go to the Twilight section where they have ther Merchandise. make sure it is surrounded by fangirls
> ...


Do not attempt while shitfaced. Results may vary, crowd control batons not included. Side effects of the series include but are not limited to: a deep, irrepressible loathing of teenage girls; distemper, hallucinations of sparkling substances, and FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF


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## mottled.kitten (Jan 15, 2009)

I lol'd at this post, and at how angry people are getting over the little things. The Twilight books are young adult novels, people, what do you expect? Have you ever lifted a young adult novel written for young ladies that was NOT completely moronic? I loved it because it was so terribly cliche and covered in sparkles (HAHAHA... no wait... nevermind). I admit it--I liked Twilight, it's my guilty pleasure. Of course, I read those books in a day each... so...

I don't have my head stuck under my tail about it, though--I wrote better stuff in middle school, and have read MUCH better, many times over. It's not OMG THE GREATEST THING IN THE WORLD, but when you're reading it... or talking about it to other people who like it... it's like being at a concert. You don't even have to like who's playing to get all hyped up and excited.

Also, Jacob. But I wasn't disappointed that Jacob failed, because it was obvious from the get-go that Bella was retarded.


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## Ozriel (Jan 15, 2009)

Shenzi said:


> Do not attempt while shitfaced. Results may vary, crowd control batons not included. Side effects of the series include but are not limited to: a deep, irrepressible loathing of teenage girls; distemper, hallucinations of sparkling substances, and FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF



"FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF"


@Mottled

It's fine if you like the book let us make fun of the erratic fanbase that Includes Furries Trolling it. 

Serously, if Furries are trolling your fandom, there is a problem.

That's what tbey said about Harry potter, but You had much older people reading it, even though it was geared towards "Children".
And Yes, I have Lifted some that wasn't complete garbage. Ever heard of the Author Kurtis Clause? She Wrote blood and Chocolate, that was a Romance Novel which was turned into a Bad movie. 

Twilight was as Cliche' and predictable as a Bad despie roleplay, with the addition of "Cock Blocks" at every corner of the romantic scenes.


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## mottled.kitten (Jan 15, 2009)

I heard about Blood & Chocolate, but I haven't read it (or seen the movie). The same friends who are into Twilight are the ones who told me about B&C.

Troll ahead. I think it's funny. =D FUNNY CAUSE IT'S TRUE.


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## Gavrill (Jan 15, 2009)

I actually liked some of Blood & Chocolate cuz fuck yeah werewolves. And sex.


Yeah it was a trashy book.


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## Azure (Jan 15, 2009)

Oidhche-Yorath said:


> http://i44.tinypic.com/14ubdw8.jpg


^

Stephanie Meyer is an affront to decent fantasy authors everywhere.  I'll just leave this here...

http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/bum-reviews/2741-twilight

and...

http://stoney321.livejournal.com/317176.html

YEA BOI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## Art Vulpine (Jan 15, 2009)

I read books 1 through 3.

It seems like some gothic emo harlequin novel.

The only teo characters I like from the series are Jacob Black and Alice Cullen.


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## mottled.kitten (Jan 16, 2009)

Inari85 said:


> I read books 1 through 3.
> 
> It seems like some gothic emo harlequin novel.
> 
> The only teo characters I like from the series are Jacob Black and Alice Cullen.



My favorite characters, ALSO.

Alice in the movie did NOT do her justice. =|

Be glad you didn't read the last book. Eclipse was probably my favorite one, being that it was saturated with werewolves (and Alice and Emmett were the only vamps I really cared hearing about)... Let's just pretend Bella was like "Screw you guys, I'm going home with Jacob--"

THE END </3


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## WolfoxOkamichan (Jan 16, 2009)

lol twilight

SPARKLING VAMPIRES LOL

But yeah, it's not that the movie is crappier - it just showed the crappiness of the movie, and that the fans are in denial.


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## Skittle (Jan 16, 2009)

That book series kills my brain cells by the thousands for the meer mention of it.


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## Endless Humiliation (Jan 16, 2009)

Mormons can write good books.


Just look at Glenn Beck.


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## ZigZag13 (Jan 17, 2009)

Inari85 said:


> I read books 1 through 3.
> 
> It seems like some gothic emo harlequin novel.



I've actually read some harlequin novels, and _they_ were a better, more inspiring read that the Twilight series.


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## SuperFurryBonzai (Jan 24, 2009)

we dont mention that name in this thread


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## WishingStar (Jan 26, 2009)

This is a thread I will have to suggest to a friend. X3


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## Ulfstan (Jan 26, 2009)

Read the first book and hated it. There were no characters, just paper cut-outs. I gave Stephanie Meyer a second chance with The Host, and still found it horrible. Now people are running up tot he actors and asking them to lick up the blood they scratched out of their necks.

Shoot, _I_ Should write a terrible book and get all of this attention.


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## WolfoxOkamichan (Jan 26, 2009)

What bothers me is that people think this is better than Harry Potter.

I mean, while HP is not a very good series, it still has a well-developed world, characters, and plot. Twilight? XD


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## AlexInsane (Jan 26, 2009)

I'M A VAMPIRE!
I'M A VAMPIRE!
SUCK MY _SPARKLY_ DIIIIICK!
I'M A VAMPIRE!


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## TehBrownPup (Jan 26, 2009)

I quite liked harry potter actually, albeit the fact that it sounds a bit suddenly-happy-ending.


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## WolfoxOkamichan (Jan 27, 2009)

Yeah. A lot of the fans hated the ending - it was too "good"/"ideal".


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## Nylak (Jan 27, 2009)

You know why I like this forum?  At my other forum, I'm the _only one_ who thinks Twilight is retarded.  >>  And if I say anything bad about it, the lynching mob starts eyeing me meaningfully.

FAF, you make me happy.


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