# Need an artist for my comic!



## Bellatrix (May 12, 2012)

**EDITS* okay, so some has come to me and has offered their services as an artist and is also helping me rewrite some things and ideas. Now its going in a semi different direction, it has a better back story and a better out look, this weekend I am going to do some massive writing. *

This is our new character concept, art wise: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7989743/

Clovis is STILL our main character.


Our backstory is now more refined as in to why she is helping said government people. The foreward story no longer has a lust or love thing in it, no more cheesy teen things. It is now leaning more toward adult subject but not in nudity, adult subject as in it has gained some type of maturity. I will post another WIP of my story once I rewrite it. 

The art for the concept character was done by eightykitty on FA

The minor backstory of Clovis being in scales instead of fur is that I wanted to have her some how hated by people and having her have scales in a predominantly furred neighborhood can lead to her hating the world, so there is a reason behind it all. Which that being said also leads to juvenile misbehavior or rebellious acts which then leads her to the 'prostitution for the government' deal.

Put it this way, she was already prostituting to make herself feel good, she got caught by the cops *short version* and thus a deal was made, so she is 19 and doing this not 18.

Either way that is the new direction, I thank eightykitty for helping me with this and I am glad said person is thrilled to help. I need stuff like this. 

If you are interested in keeping up with my progress please keep up with this zine section. I will be posting my next update somewhere in this Zine area so that you all can see what I have done new to refine what I had done before.

Thank you all for your advice, it was more than considered! Please, watch my progress and give me feed back! I need people to tell me what they think. After all, you are the readers lol


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## Smelge (May 12, 2012)

You need to do a story outline, and add as much detail as you can. If you want an artist to work with you, you need to provide them with the information they will need to decide if they want to try it or not.

It'll give you better results.


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## Bellatrix (May 12, 2012)

Ah yeah, I do have a story outline i just dont have it in a formal form.

our entire brainstorm is right here: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7780883/

That is how I came to that first page.

The basic idea starts out as the reader finds out she is prostituting.

Second arch involves why she is prostituting.

Third arch will involve another character, one of which she may like, and finding out that she has a crush on said person.

Then at some point said person finds out in the fourth arch and also in fourth arch she doesnt know that he knows until he tells her. Its like a hidden secret on both sides.

Fifth arch said person finally tells her and she is devastated and spends the whole arch trying to explain what was going on and leads to much disbelief.

Sixth arch, not sure yet, but that can be thought up, a lot within those archs has to do with the reason why she is doing what she is doing. I have a lot of filler information that can be put in but Yeah, thats the basic outline of at least a good six chapters. or archs, or what have you.


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## FruitSeeker (May 13, 2012)

I might be your artist  But I'm still kinda learning to draw out anthros and furries ^^'


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## Bellatrix (May 14, 2012)

OH thats so cool  Oh can you link me some of your stuff so I can look, honestly I might as well say yahoo go for it, but I still wanna see hehe


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## Deo (May 14, 2012)

That character is a clusterfuck of compounding clusterfucks. A megafuck. To be perfectly honest with yout that character has the most hideous color scheme I have ever seen on anything ever. Ever. Sorry.




You have a brown burnt umber/raw sienna/magenta color, then that turns more purple as gravity takes effect,  then there's a hot pink flesh monster on her chest, and top it all off with accenting flue-season yellow-green and light pink.  Oh and some whitened Phthalo blue sneakers. This is a color abomination. Seriously, I desperately want to help you. My skin is crawling to help you with color theory. Unfortunately you cannot sense my complete color despair across the internet.
So maybe at the very least I can recommend two books to help:
Color and Light: A Guide for the Realist Painter
Color Theory

Now you also have very uninteresting views of your character in a very boring layout. BOX BOX BOX BOX. All around the same shape and size and with annoyingly unstraight edges. For the life of me I cannot tell if those edges are purposefully chaotic or just lazy sloppy work. Anyways, variation in drawing scenes gives the story motion and progress. Repeating the same image (basically) for an entire page must be done with an intended purpose, like drawing out a scene or having a character in deep thought. Multiple panels of the same thing work only to slow down the plot. You need different views and panels to keep the story moving rather than stalling. And this is your exposition, your one chance to hook your audience. You want something interesting, flowing, and memorable that draws them in and keeps them reading. A bland panel of a hideously colored thingy surrounded by similar panels of the hideously colored thingy doing exactly what it was doing for the previous five panels is unutterably boring. Don't do it. Keep things moving, keep your point of view (or camera angle) moving, keep your character's faces animated and alive instead of the same set-in-stone facial expressions. Body movement. Gestures. Use of negative space. Proper layout. These are things I reccommend you look into by grabbing a book at your local library and reading up on.



Bellatrix said:


> Ah yeah, I do have a story outline i just dont have it in a formal form.
> 
> our entire brainstorm is right here: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7780883/





			
				That FurAffinity Link said:
			
		

> I am looking to collab with any artist for anyone looking to start up a  comic or something of the sort. I quite enjoy writing and have been  looking to start up a comic with some one, I dont have enough examples  in my FA, BUT I am willing to upload more or note you some of my  writing. I lean more towards realistic fiction, almost anything fiction.  I am very flexible. As you can see I cannot draw, but if some one is  willing to draw and have me write some unique stories up to go with the  comic I would rather enjoy that.


Still vague as fuck.


And I see why it's vague as fuck. The story is awful. I've made a flow chart for you:

*Whore â†’ Hooker with a heart of gold â†’ Love interest â†’ easily foreseen cliche drama â†’ guh continued â†’ LOL I DUNNO â†’ WUTSA "CONCLUSION"?*


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## triage (May 14, 2012)

deo said everything i was going to say about the sparkledog except better and probably much more civilly. 

also read this and many of the entries here to get a feel for dialogue and scriptwriting. what you have is very decompressed, and not in a "widescreen comic" good way popularized by warren ellis or AKIRA back in the day. it's just enormous text boxes. in a comic, unless you're warren ellis, this is going to come off as very grating to the pace of a story.


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## Smelge (May 14, 2012)

I get this feeling that there's a degree of compensation going on. You're new to writing scripts, and the artists that you've used so far have been fairly inexperienced. And to compensate for that, you've got to put in a prostitute/sex angle to make up for the inexperience elsewhere.

I swear, the only way to get a comic popular around here is to make it adult. But instead of trying, you're just taking a well-worn route.


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## Bellatrix (May 15, 2012)

@smelge Yes, I am new to writing scripts, but not stories. I like drama in my writing, that is about it. So I went for something I felt wasnt going around, say an underaged undercover prostitute with a photographic memory. Rare things but I have seen worse pieces of writing dear. And I wasnt going to put a single bit of actual sex into it, just that it is implied that she has that awkward job, no one was going to be seeing any naught bits or boobs. Remember back when when they blacked out the screen for sex effects? Yeah, that sort of deal. So no, I didnt not create it as 'adult' so it would be popular. I created it as a prostitute because I felt it would be an interesting angle. As for anything relating to what *Deo* 	 had said you now the whole 



> *Whore â†’ Hooker with a heart of gold â†’ Love interest â†’ easily foreseen cliche drama â†’ guh continued â†’ LOL I DUNNO â†’ WUTSA "CONCLUSION"?*


Yeah it may need a little work, I agree, which is also why I am trying to bring people on to work with. I am not trying to make a popular zine just something that may interest people. I thought a 19 something year old person doing secret undercover work as a prostitute to get viable information on said villian I will create later on, would make an interesting story. The whole photographic memory thing can be entirely lost. And I like drama, cliche or not, I like drama, all drama is cliche. Forgive me if drama is my style of writing, it is one that I write best in. Smelge, I am honestly trying, I have other pieces on my FA page, poetry mostly, and some short stories, that are actually quite fair. I do want to get into script writing, and comic writing perhaps, but I am just starting this type of writing style IS new to me.

Now, Deo. I will mention again that I did not DRAW THE ART. Not in any way. The artist picked out what the character looked like, showed me WIPs and bought an adoptable to go by. I said sure she is the artist. WELL she is out of commission right now because she lost all the work. To be honest I agree with you, I need a lot of work, but I am JUST STARTING this. You know, at the beginning I thought you were harsh then I read on and my view did change. I thank you for being quite helpful actually, but like I said.. I am looking for an artist, if we have to redraw the entire first page then we will. Maybe I will offer out a different color design for the character or something, but to be honest.. I dont have art experience and this is not at all my drawing. I dont know what she was thinking doing it so I cant really speak on her behalf other than to say this is HER work and not mine.

@Triage Tthe box's started out as the camera that she clicks on, perhaps another artist could have done a different job. I can completely agree with that triage, and thank you for the links to look at for script writing, I truly have been desiring more research on it a friend is supposed to lend me her writing for media book that involves angles and such and I think that would help in my script writing.

If helping me appeals to ANY of you, one that would be awesome, and two I would actually quite appreciate it. I wouldnt mind having other writers to bounce ideas off from rather than an artist. Like I said its not meant to be an actual adult comic, just the implication that it is. In no way is there to be nudity in this, that is not the direction I am going. I think the closes to nudity you would get would be in the last frame that I had written in which she is in fishnet stalkings mini skirt and all that done up suchness. I mean I started the whole thing. I can drop it. The comic was my idea and I can just as easily tell the artist dont worry about it, I am just going to start with a new artist because the story changed.

I wouldnt mind taking either of you on in this comic, I know its a little sketchy so far, but I also didnt have a writer to go off from. Which I guess in retrospect I should have done.  As you clearly see, I need help, and I wouldnt mind more of your help to aid me in refining this comic as a story, the art can come later I would think. The story is whats important to me. And if people are saying the story is bad, well I guess I need help with it.

I do have the first page of frames and stuff but thats honestly it, it needs a little editing now that I look back at it. But I wouldnt mind brainstorming plot wise. So, it seems  I still need help. I am quite understanding as you can see. Also, I know what a conclusion is Deo -_-; I just hadnt thought of one yet >.< 

In any event, Thank you guys for the feed back, it actually helps. I understand what you all were talking about, I can only improve and get better there is no getting worse. If you would like to help me brainstorm story wise, please let me know.. considering I feel like thats where this has gone now instead of the art.


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## Jim_Moriarty (May 17, 2012)

Your WIP script is pretty , well , awful.

1-Considering she's old enough to whore herself out in a brothel , I will assume she is at least 18. Which makes throwing erasers at someone's head a bit childish for a classmate of her age to do. 

2-The whole passive agressive emo mega bitch thing has been done to death .

3-The last part of your WIP script reads like "My Immortal" and that is obviously not a good thing.

The way you should proceed with this is to write a full script WITHOUT thinking about it as a comic. Just write your character out , the story and everything. 

THEN after you're done with that , rewrite a new version WITH the comic directions added

Then have your artist make character sheets of the characters.

THEN have your artist draw a storyboard , or a cheap quick crappy version of what the comic will be like for page layout purposes


THEN and only then can you even start considering making the actual comic.


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## Bellatrix (May 18, 2012)

This thread has been edited, please read it over again and give me more feedback! I enjoy it more than you know!.  I will create a new thread that has updates for my comic and stuff. sorry I am not very wordy today heh, very tired from work. But I will be posting updates some where here so please read and give me critique and feed back, I think I like the new direction


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