# PHP and MySQL Help



## arcticsilver (Aug 8, 2008)

I am looking into learning both of these pieces of software but can't find a good tutorial for either of them.  Could someone give me some links to either one of them.  Thanks.


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 8, 2008)

http://www.google.ca/search?q=php+mysql+tutorial

Try the first few links

The followign site is always good:
www.tizag.com/mysqlTutorial


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## Xenofur (Aug 8, 2008)

Try starting out here for a language that doesn't make you a bad programmer: http://fchan.us/pbp.rar


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## Eevee (Aug 8, 2008)

PHP is total garbage

but while PBP is a cool book it's not very good for actually _teaching_ you a language  8)  for that you would want Learning Perl


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 8, 2008)

Xenofur said:


> Try starting out here for a language that doesn't make you a bad programmer:



Being a bad programmer doesn't matter if no one else will ever use your software anyways.

[nsfw] http://teddziuba.com/2008/04/im-going-to-scale-my-foot-up-y.html


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## Xenofur (Aug 8, 2008)

Eevee said:


> but while PBP is a cool book it's not very good for actually _teaching_ you a language  8)  for that you would want Learning Perl


those are in there too. maybe i should rename the file sometime.





hiphopopotimus said:


> Being a bad programmer doesn't matter if no one else will ever use your software anyways.


completely true, however i don't see how that has anything to do with perl, which is used extremely widely?


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## arcticsilver (Aug 9, 2008)

hiphopopotimus said:


> http://www.google.ca/search?q=php+mysql+tutorial
> 
> Try the first few links
> 
> ...



thanks for the help with the links to what i was asking for.  The one you suggested will suite me find for my entry into mysql and php journey.


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## Eevee (Aug 11, 2008)

arcticsilver said:


> thanks for the help with the links to what i was asking for.  The one you suggested will suite me find for my entry into mysql and php journey.


thanks for listening to us

enjoy your journey into learning a crappy language with a crappy community that will make you a crappy programmer


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## Pi (Aug 12, 2008)

php and mysql help: slam your junk in the car door, then do the same thing to everyone who will ever have to maintain your code.


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 12, 2008)

Eevee said:


> enjoy your journey into learning a crappy language with a crappy community that will make you a crappy programmer



You're just grumpy because python isn't a real language


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## Magnus (Aug 12, 2008)

ouch~


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## Eevee (Aug 12, 2008)

hiphopopotimus said:


> You're just grumpy because python isn't a real language


nobody had mentioned python yet in this thread  :eng99:

but it is a good suggestion nonetheless thanks


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## arcticsilver (Aug 16, 2008)

Wow it seems that there was a slight programming language war while I was gone.  I tried a little bit of php and python.  Both are very great pieces of open source software but I feel alot more comfortable with php.


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## Pi (Aug 16, 2008)

That's because PHP is designed for total morons.


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## verix (Aug 16, 2008)

hiphopopotimus said:


> You're just grumpy because python isn't a real language


Look at you, all arrogant and assuming you've got the moral high-ground when you've got C++ in your signature.

Come on, man. You wanna start a language war, you're going to be one-upped by the Assembly writers.


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## net-cat (Aug 16, 2008)

...

This thread is now stupid. I've written some code to illustrate that point.


```
library ieee;
use ieee.std_logic_1164.all; 

entity opinion is
    port
    (
        thread  : inout std_logic,
        stupid  : inout std_logic
    );
end opinion;

architecture sucks of opinion is
begin
    thread <= stupid;
end sucks;
```

See how much better my esoteric language that nobody cares about is?


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## Xenofur (Aug 16, 2008)

Nobody is annoyed that he isn't using their specific language.

We're just annoyed that another human waste bag is going to increase the waste pit that is php. Even Basic is preferable.


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 16, 2008)

verix said:


> Look at you, all arrogant and assuming you've got the moral high-ground when you've got C++ in your signature.



You assume I would defend C++, no I wouldn't. It's a horribly flawed language founded on a bad ideas and glue sniffing. There are 1001 ways that it could be improved(the success of java and C# are a testament to this), and the changes in C++0x are only a tiny dent in what needs to be done to fix it.




Xenofur said:


> Even Basic is preferable.



That's a dirty lie, both are equally unappealing.


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## verix (Aug 16, 2008)

hiphopopotimus said:


> There are 1001 ways that it could be improved(the success of java and C# are a testament to this)



You just implied that Java is an _improvement_ over C++.

Think about what you just said.


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 16, 2008)

verix said:


> You just implied that Java is an _improvement_ over C++.



No, I implied that java's popularity is a direct result of c++ flaws.


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## arcticsilver (Aug 17, 2008)

Wooh I think i started a war.


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## arcticsilver (Aug 17, 2008)

verix said:


> Look at you, all arrogant and assuming you've got the moral high-ground when you've got C++ in your signature.
> 
> Come on, man. You wanna start a language war, you're going to be one-upped by the Assembly writers.



Yeah assembly people are hardcore mofo's since there at the lowest level you could go.


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## net-cat (Aug 17, 2008)

arcticsilver said:


> Yeah assembly people are hardcore mofo's since there at the lowest level you could go.



... no, it's not.


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 17, 2008)

arcticsilver said:


> Yeah assembly people are hardcore mofo's since there at the lowest level you could go.



Two problems with your statement:
 - coding in the lowest level of language doesn't make you hardcore unless your task specifically requires it - best tool for the job
 - you could manually program each bit individually, I know someone who programmed an EEPROM with a battery.


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## nrr (Aug 18, 2008)

net-cat said:


> This thread is now stupid.


iawtc.

The point here is that you should use whatever fucking language you like.  You'll either love it and come to admire its wrinkles, or you'll hate it and wish it a burning eternal afterlife in hell.

Personally, I detest PHP.  I grew up with C (C89 and K&R, depending on the book I was reading), and I started writing Lisp a few years later.  PHP just rubs me the wrong way.

Now, go away and get some actual work done.  If you don't have work to get done, choke on a bucket of cocks.


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 18, 2008)

nrr said:


> If you don't have work to get done, choke on a bucket of cocks.



I call rule 34 on that.


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## net-cat (Aug 18, 2008)

nrr said:


> The point here is that you should use whatever fucking language you like.


... and realize that languages are not one-size-fits-all. 

If PHP works for you, use it. I don't really care. Do the universe a favor and take the time to learn proper coding skills, though. If you don't, well, it doesn't take much digging to discover that the current coding staff thinks the original coder of FA was (is?) grossly incompetent at best.


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## Pi (Aug 19, 2008)

PHP is a minor evil perpetrated and created by incompetent amateurs, whereas Perl is a great and insidious evil, perpetrated by skilled but perverted professionals. -- Jon Ribbens


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## arcticsilver (Aug 19, 2008)

net-cat said:


> ... and realize that languages are not one-size-fits-all.
> 
> If PHP works for you, use it. I don't really care. Do the universe a favor and take the time to learn proper coding skills, though. If you don't, well, it doesn't take much digging to discover that the current coding staff thinks the original coder of FA was (is?) grossly incompetent at best.



Kinda reminds me of one of my early mistakes with a c++ for statement that was not initialized properly.  Out of a list of 26 students 2 Billion got an A while one got a F.  Come to find out after looking at it for 5 minutes i saw what the problem was.  Learned a lesson that day.

this was what the problem was for (start; start < 26; count++)

Silly me.


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## Pi (Aug 19, 2008)

arcticsilver said:


> Kinda reminds me of one of my early mistakes with a c++ for statement that was not initialized properly.  Out of a list of 26 students 2 Billion got an A while one got a F.  Come to find out after looking at it for 5 minutes i saw what the problem was.  Learned a lesson that day.
> 
> this was what the problem was for (start; start < 26; count++)
> 
> Silly me.



This is why explicit for loops are dumb. Learn to Iterator, or whatever C++ calls it.


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## net-cat (Aug 19, 2008)

```
std::vector<urtype> urlist;
std::vector<urtype>::iterator start;

// add stuff to urlist

for ( start = urlist.begin(); start != urlist.end(); ++start )
{
    // loopy stuff here
}
```

Yay iterators. Or .size() and .at() for all the difference it makes.


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## hiphopopotimus (Aug 19, 2008)

net-cat said:


> ```
> std::vector<urtype> urlist;
> std::vector<urtype>::iterator start;
> 
> ...




```
for ( start = urlist.begin(); start != urlist.end(); ++count)
{
    //To infinity... AND BEYOND!
}
```



arcticsilver said:


> for (start; start < 26; count++)



same bug/typo that arcticsilver described is still possible.

This is why c++ needs a for_each loop that allows for code blocks, addition is for uncultured swine.


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## verix (Aug 19, 2008)

hiphopopotimus said:


> same bug/typo that arcticsilver described is still possible.
> 
> This is why c++ needs a for_each loop that allows for code blocks, addition is for uncultured swine.


...huh? How so? I'm pretty sure the ++foo/foo++ operators are overloaded in vector<> to do the equivalent of ptr+=sizeof(type).

edit: meant ::iterator, not vector<>, whoops.


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## nrr (Aug 19, 2008)

hiphopopotimus said:


> This is why c++ needs to die.


Fixed.

Real men use Lisp.


```
;; iterative example with LOOP
(loop as x in '(a b c d e) do
      (do-stuff x))
```


```
;; recursive example
(defun recursive-foreach (items)
  (if items
    (progn
      (do-stuff (car items))
      (recursive-foreach (cdr items)))
    nil))
```


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## Runefox (Aug 19, 2008)

Ah, go write some APL or COBOL.


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## nrr (Aug 19, 2008)

Runefox said:


> Ah, go write some ... COBOL.


Hey, now, that's just starting to cross the line into real world applications!

Just what do you think we are?  Application programmers?  Bah!


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## Runefox (Aug 19, 2008)

Fine, then. XP How about some ASP? Because at the end of the day, it's all about how much you can slow down a nice, big Windows Server. Like turning on Aero on Server 2008. =D


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## nrr (Aug 19, 2008)

Runefox said:


> How about some ASP? Because at the end of the day, it's all about how much you can slow down a nice, big Windows Server.


Oh, haha.


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## Foamy (Aug 20, 2008)

MySQL is great to know if you want to create a private game server.


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## verix (Aug 20, 2008)

Foamy said:


> MySQL is great to know if you want to create a private game server.


oh, well then


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