# Furry Dating/Hookup Websites - Are They All Bad?



## Autumn the Squirrel (May 6, 2019)

I made a post regarding furry dating/hookup websites recently, but, looking back at it, I am dissatisfied with what I posted. This new thread will hopefully convey my thoughts and questions much more effectively. 

While browsing furry-related pages on Facebook, I stumbled across a page advertising a furry dating/hookup website. Intrigued, I searched for the website and ultimately decided to make an account. The idea behind a website centered around connecting very specific communities of people truly is a genius one as, regardless of how it may seem, none of us are as unique as we may believe, so meeting others like us is definitely possible when given the platform to connect with one another easily. The furry community is one comprised of social rejects of many different types, so a furry-only dating/hookup website would offer individual members of the furry community a much greater chance at success than anywhere else. 

The problem I noticed with the website I joined, and the problem I began reading about regarding other websites, is how they lock users out of essential features, such as reading messages, until they pay a subscription fee; using bot accounts to trick users into doing so. The concept behind these websites is a genius one, but it seems as though all of them are scams (with alternatives, such as Facebook groups, not having enough members to offer even the slightest chance of finding someone locally.)

So, is it safe more me to assume that this brilliant concept has yet to be truly realized? Has the execution been nothing more than scams and failures? Seeing such potential wasted is a very frustrating thing, and I would like what I have seen to not be all there is.


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## Ra'ara Su'nai (May 6, 2019)

I've checked out a few dating sites, and basically all of them are the same model. No messaging until you pay. The only exception I've found is an anime one called MaiOtaku, but that's because it's more of a forum with a very incomplete matching system that the admins don't seem to have any plans to finish. Still, I can't totally knock MaiOtaku. That is where I met my girlfriend. She isn't a furry herself, but she's cool with the furry fandom.


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## quoting_mungo (May 6, 2019)

Pounced, when it still existed, was sometimes a bit cringy (but so will anything publishing personals tbfh), but overall not the worst thing ever for finding people in your area. SESTA/FOSTA sadly spelled an end to that site, though.

I can't speak for any dating sites out there, but I do know there's a bunch of singles/seeking-a-partner type groups on mainsite FA, so maybe have a look around those if you're interested?


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 6, 2019)

quoting_mungo said:


> Pounced, when it still existed, was sometimes a bit cringy (but so will anything publishing personals tbfh), but overall not the worst thing ever for finding people in your area. SESTA/FOSTA sadly spelled an end to that site, though.
> 
> I can't speak for any dating sites out there, but I do know there's a bunch of singles/seeking-a-partner type groups on mainsite FA, so maybe have a look around those if you're interested?



I looked (briefly) into the whole FOSTA thing, and I really don't understand it. Couldn't _*any*_ dating website be used for human trafficking? It doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me that only certain websites would close their doors due to such a thing while others are left completely unaffected. 

I had no idea that Fur Affinity had anything like groups (outside of these forums.) How would I go about finding them?


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 6, 2019)

Ra'ara Su'nai said:


> I've checked out a few dating sites, and basically all of them are the same model. No messaging until you pay. The only exception I've found is an anime one called MaiOtaku, but that's because it's more of a forum with a very incomplete matching system that the admins don't seem to have any plans to finish. Still, I can't totally knock MaiOtaku. That is where I met my girlfriend. She isn't a furry herself, but she's cool with the furry fandom.



That's a shame, but it matches up with what I've read.


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## Canis Dirus (May 6, 2019)

Autumn the Squirrel said:


> The problem I noticed with the website I joined, and the problem I began reading about regarding other websites, is how they lock users out of essential features, such as reading messages, until they pay a subscription fee; using bot accounts to trick users into doing so.


Why should this site be any different from big players, like OkCupid? Especially when, on the one hand, they a small forage base and narrow specialization, and on the other - their food don't have a many places to go.



Ra'ara Su'nai said:


> I've checked out a few dating sites, and basically all of them are the same model. No messaging until you pay.


Well, about 12-15 years ago you, at least, could communicate for free. And they didn’t even demand that you give your cell phone number to spammers!



Autumn the Squirrel said:


> I looked (briefly) into the whole FOSTA thing, and I really don't understand it. Couldn't _*any*_ dating website be used for human trafficking? It doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me that only certain websites would close their doors due to such a thing while others are left completely unaffected.


Within days of its passage, Craigslist took down its personals  section, saying it couldn’t take the risk that someone in the section could be accused of violating FOSTA without jeopardizing other services.


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## gabbo13 (May 6, 2019)

I only use Howlr, which is Tinder but for furries. I don't know if you tried out because I found some interesting people inside and outside of my country where I live. The other sites is Ferzu, but unlike Howlr, is more a freemium service. 

On the other hand, sometimes is hard to find the "perfect" companion to talk with and hook up.


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 6, 2019)

gabbo13 said:


> I only use Howlr, which is Tinder but for furries. I don't know if you tried out because I found some interesting people inside and outside of my country where I live. The other sites is Ferzu, but unlike Howlr, is more a freemium service.
> 
> On the other hand, sometimes is hard to find the "perfect" companion to talk with and hook up.



I read that Ferzu is going the route of those other websites soon.


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## gabbo13 (May 6, 2019)

Autumn the Squirrel said:


> I read that Ferzu is going the route of those other websites soon.


Yeah.


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## Kinare (May 6, 2019)

Autumn the Squirrel said:


> I read that Ferzu is going the route of those other websites soon.



Is that really the case? I don't see anything from them saying such a thing. Got a link or something to where you read that? I was gonna pop in here and say how I've been liking Ferzu because I can easily filter out creeps and it's more of a Facebook/Twitter for furries with a side of typical dating site stuff, but if this is true then cancel my praise for it. :v


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 6, 2019)

Kinare said:


> Is that really the case? I don't see anything from them saying such a thing. Got a link or something to where you read that? I was gonna pop in here and say how I've been liking Ferzu because I can easily filter out creeps and it's more of a Facebook/Twitter for furries with a side of typical dating site stuff, but if this is true then cancel my praise for it. :v



I read it here: Ferzu - WikiFur, the furry encyclopedia


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## Kinare (May 6, 2019)

Autumn the Squirrel said:


> I read it here: Ferzu - WikiFur, the furry encyclopedia



Ohhh, ok, yeah, supposedly that stuff is already in place because I saw some newsfeed posts about it, but you're not limited on messages at least which is what I was worried your comment was getting at because most places I've seen restrict messaging too. x-x I've not run into any of the limits being an issue yet, but I am more of a gawker who occasionally PMs folks than someone who routinely engages the community there.


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 6, 2019)

Kinare said:


> Ohhh, ok, yeah, supposedly that stuff is already in place because I saw some newsfeed posts about it, but you're not limited on messages at least which is what I was worried your comment was getting at because most places I've seen restrict messaging too. x-x I've not run into any of the limits being an issue yet, but I am more of a gawker who occasionally PMs folks than someone who routinely engages the community there.



That's what I figured from reading what I sent you, so I'm glad I was wrong.


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## quoting_mungo (May 7, 2019)

Autumn the Squirrel said:


> I looked (briefly) into the whole FOSTA thing, and I really don't understand it. Couldn't _*any*_ dating website be used for human trafficking? It doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me that only certain websites would close their doors due to such a thing while others are left completely unaffected.


It's partly a budget issue - Match and OkCupid make bank, for instance, so they can afford to fight if push comes to shove. (The law is blatantly unconstitutional, but someone has to fight to get ot to the Supreme Court, so...)
Partly, it's an ignorance/flying under the radar issue - tiny-ass sites either don't know/understand what kind of liability/risk the legislation is, or they figure they're too small to ever come on anyone's radar. Which... to some degree they may be right in - goodness knows if I was a trafficker, I wouldn't be trying to use a dating site with like a hundred members to drum up business, yanno?

Pounced isn't the only site effected - Craigslist closed their personals section, and there's speculation that SESTA/FOSTA is behind Tumblr's porn ban. (I suspect it's more to do with the app store issues they had, but it could well be both or one aggravating the other.)



Autumn the Squirrel said:


> I had no idea that Fur Affinity had anything like groups (outside of these forums.) How would I go about finding them?


Groups on FA are a bit of a bodge (a lot of one, actually), and mostly the way to find them tends to be seeing them listed on people's profiles, to be perfectly honest. Userpage of FA-groups -- Fur Affinity [dot] net also has a directory.


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## MAN_BURD (May 11, 2019)

i met my girlfriend on ferzu (i think) but i found out that she was an actual dog on our third date, when her comically large trenchcoat fell off

doesnt matter, i guess. my dick cant tell the difference


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## Skittlesthehusky (May 12, 2019)

personally, i haven't seen those furry dating websites myself, but i can say for certain that i don't exactly know how to feel about it.
especially from what i'm hearing about the paywall? it seems to me like they're more money grabbers than anything. i'm not sure what the purpose is for making someone pay just to find someone?

like facebook or tinder can most likely do a better job than that, right?


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 12, 2019)

Skittlesthehusky said:


> personally, i haven't seen those furry dating websites myself, but i can say for certain that i don't exactly know how to feel about it.
> especially from what i'm hearing about the paywall? it seems to me like they're more money grabbers than anything. i'm not sure what the purpose is for making someone pay just to find someone?
> 
> like facebook or tinder can most likely do a better job than that, right?



You'd think. What really bothers me is the fact that you're really throwing money away regardless of the outcome. If you find someone, you'll exchange external ways of communicating. If you don't find someone, you spent money with nothing to show for it.


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## Kinare (May 12, 2019)

To an extent I understand some things being behind a paywall because websites need money to run. Completely free sites are mostly just trash in general. There's plenty of them out there and they're all full of spam/bot accounts or people just looking for a quick fuck or to take advantage of you. Met a smol handful of nice folks on that there Ferzu to keep around as friends, which is more than I can say for almost every other website, dating or not, that I've been on.


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## Fuzzylumkin (May 17, 2019)

I've recently found myself on the market again, and i tried furrymate.com and you have to pay to do almost anything like even read messages. I tried a 3 day trial  sub, but it also appears as if they have bot accounts that send you messages to keep you coming back to pay to read them. so yeah, that was a bust... and furzu, the closest furs on my area on that are like 150 miles away


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 17, 2019)

Fuzzylumkin said:


> I've recently found myself on the market again, and i tried furrymate.com and you have to pay to do almost anything like even read messages. I tried a 3 day trial  sub, but it also appears as if they have bot accounts that send you messages to keep you coming back to pay to read them. so yeah, that was a bust... and furzu, the closest furs on my area on that are like 150 miles away



I've joined Ferzu due to a previous comment, and its users aren't really the best to interact with. There are a small handful of people within driving distance of me, but I haven't really caught them while they were on yet. My thoughts on the website aren't super positive.


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## Fuzzylumkin (May 17, 2019)

Autumn the Squirrel said:


> I've joined Ferzu due to a previous comment, and its users aren't really the best to interact with. There are a small handful of people within driving distance of me, but I haven't really caught them while they were on yet. My thoughts on the website aren't super positive.



yeah its kinda a waste, i had a couple positive hits off pounced, back before it shut down, but other than that, i've found furry dating sites to be useless


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## Gradiusgadwin (May 18, 2019)

With catfishing being common in furry fandom, I don't think the idea of a furry dating site is good.


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## Fuzzylumkin (May 18, 2019)

maybe someone should make a thread here on fur affinity, where people can post an add about themselves


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## Pinky (May 19, 2019)

I think it would be more important to find common interests other than being a furry. Having only one thing in common isn't going to work out well in the long run. When people answered my ads on furry sites, we never had much and common and really, we never even made it as far as being friends because our interests were just too different there was nothing that could really click between us.


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## Filter (May 19, 2019)

Pinky said:


> I think it would be more important to find common interests other than being a furry. Having only one thing in common isn't going to work out well in the long run. When people answered my ads on furry sites, we never had much and common and really, we never even made it as far as being friends because our interests were just too different there was nothing that could really click between us.


Yeah, furry isn't much of a foundation to base relationships on. It might be nice to have a furry-friendly option on mainstream dating sites, however. Maybe something to indicate that you're cool with dating people who have hobbies or interests that are sometimes considered weird or eccentric.


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## Autumn the Squirrel (May 20, 2019)

Pinky said:


> I think it would be more important to find common interests other than being a furry. Having only one thing in common isn't going to work out well in the long run. When people answered my ads on furry sites, we never had much and common and really, we never even made it as far as being friends because our interests were just too different there was nothing that could really click between us.



Sure, but, as stated in my initial post, the furry community presents itself as being as inclusive as possible which leads to a lot of its members having facts about them that make them undesirable to most. Mental disabilities, for example, is something that two members of the furry community are more likely to have in common than if one of them were to just jump on Plenty of Fish, and two people with mental disabilities are more likely to have a successful relationship as they can have the patience to deal with something like autism due to personal experience. If you're considered undesirable to your average Joe or Jane on the street then there's something about you that is more likely to be accepted by furries.


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## Fuzzylumkin (May 20, 2019)

I look at it like this. For a lot of us, sure.. its a hobby, but its probably also a big part of our lifes as well, if we invest the time and money into suits and conventions, we want to find someone who can go to cons with us, or be interested in it, so sure, it's also just one facet of who you are, however... i guarantee if you go to Plenty Of Fish and put in your list of hobbies that you like to dress up like a panda or a squirrel and go to conventions... your profile is going to be a virtual dead zone. So sure, maybe dating someone based on whether or not they are a furry isnt everything, its like... i probably wouldnt get along too well with a sports fan, sure, there may be an attraction, and we may have other things in common, but on sundays when shes sitting in front of the tv screaming at the dudes to like.. kick the ball or something... I am going to be bored out of my mind lol


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## skroge (Apr 1, 2020)

You got Badoo, and some other dating site well most of them are fake people want you to fall for their traps I chat with a 18 year old black mix Puerto Rican woman that she was kicked out from her house by her parents and she wanted me to give her money.


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