# Stupid people in school.



## eversleep (Jan 10, 2011)

This is a thread where you post stupid things that people in school said.
Here are some examples:

~7th grade history class, we were learning about some Native American creation myth. The teacher explains how, according to the myth, people were made of clay and baked in an oven or something like that. If they weren't cooked enough, they came out like white people. If they were burnt, they came out darker like Africans. But if they were cooked just right, they had Native American's skin tone. So then a kid raises his hand and says: "You mean, like... white boy!?". 

~7th grade math. This kid is supposed to be answering a math problem, and he's taking forever. The teacher says "Hurry up! You're slower than molasses in an igloo!". To which the kid asks "Who's molasses?". The teacher says "Molasses isn't a who, it's a thick syrup.". He says: "Oh... but syrup can't move!".

~Same math class as above. Teacher's saying something about triangles, then a kid raises her hand and says "Why do some people call them friangles?". The teacher asks "Who calls them friangles?" to which the kid replies "Chuckie Finster calls them friangles.".

~10th grade history. We're watching some movie that takes place in England in like the 1600's or 1700's, and some girl asks: "Do people in England still dress like that?".


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## Xenke (Jan 10, 2011)

This is why the education system is stupid and doesn't deserve to be funded.


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## Deo (Jan 10, 2011)

Hush little baby,
don't say a word


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## Kihari (Jan 10, 2011)

In some high school class we were watching "The Day After Tomorrow" (lol public education) and it came to the part where they look out the windows to see a ship drifting down the flooded street. One girl in the back pipes up, "WHAT'S THAT!?!?"

...yeah, I've got nothin'.



eversleep said:


> Chuckie Finster


 
I had to Google it. =(


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## Digitalpotato (Jan 10, 2011)

A lot of the stupid stuff I see in school is actually at Subway because it's in the college. 

Stuff I've seen are:


"Does the $5 footlong work on six inches?"
"How big is a footlong?"
"What can I order here?"
"Are you guys open?"
"Do you have tacos?"
"Do you serve beer?" (when there is a BAR literally ten feet away that has a liquor license. -_-) 

Actually you can probably just look up my Subway Rants.  90% of those are students anyways


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## Thou Dog (Jan 10, 2011)

I remember one pretty and hard-working young lady in one of my classes who was asked to summarize a few articles about Eric Kandel's work with the sea hare, _Aplysia californica_ I think. It's basically a large underwater slug. However, because we had earlier been working on articles about people with various forms of memory failure due to brain damage - like Patient HM (aka Henry Gustav Molaison) - she assumed _Aplysia_ was a neurological disease. Her presentation discussed Kandel's work on "_Aplysia_ patients".

The girl wasn't stupid, just a little inattentive at times. Still, the teacher was struggling not to burst out laughing throughout the presentation.


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## Fay V (Jan 10, 2011)

I can't remember the last really stupid thing I did in class. It happens often enough. the last really stupid thing i did was when I came down here. I like looking for out of state license plates. I'm in hawaii. for a brief stupid second I thought "huh they don't seem to get a lot of cars visiting from other states..." and then I felt like a moron


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## Daisy La Liebre (Jan 10, 2011)

Digitalpotato said:


> "How big is a footlong?"


 
He can't have been serious.


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## Pine (Jan 10, 2011)

I remember in 10th grade when we were playing some kind of quiz game and the question was about a volcano. One blonde had an answer that was so dumb that I almost slapped her.
*Mount Saint Rushmore*
I'm not even kidding...

OFF TOPIC
also at work:
"Do you guys have Coke products or Pepsi products?" -customer
"We have Coca Cola products." -me
"Do you have Mountain Dew?"

*facepalm


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## Leafblower29 (Jan 10, 2011)

"Is Andrew Jackson related to Michael Jackson?"


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## Randy-Darkshade (Jan 10, 2011)

eversleep said:


> ~10th grade history. We're watching some movie that takes place in England in like the 1600's or 1700's, and some girl asks: "Do people in England still dress like that?".



WTF? Does she not watch modern movies? How can people be this stupid?


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## Don (Jan 10, 2011)

I have a few that I can remember.

In 7th Grade history, we were watching a documentary about the War of 1812. About halfway through, a girl raises her hand and asks if the film was made with actual footage from the war. Cue the rest of the class and the teacher looking at her as if she's insane.

A few years later when we were studying trigonometry, someone asked what a four-sided triangle was called.


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## Joeyyy (Jan 10, 2011)

Kihari said:


> I had to Google it. =(


you shouldnt be alive right now.


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## Xenke (Jan 10, 2011)

Don_Wolf said:


> A few years later when we were studying trigonometry, someone asked what a four-sided triangle was called.


 
Obviously a double-triangle.


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## Tewin Follow (Jan 10, 2011)

Well, that's why they're in school! :U


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## Kibou (Jan 10, 2011)

8th grade - History Class
We were having an off topic discussion about tourists
When this blonde chick raises her hand and says
"Why would we want tourists to come here?. They blow stuff up."
She thought tourists meant terrorists 

Fuck yea public education


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## Randy-Darkshade (Jan 10, 2011)

Has anyone noticed that just under half of the replies here all state it was a girl being stupid? 

Take into account a few replies don't even mention stupid moments in school.

7 counts of girls being mentioned as asking stupid questions, 8 replies not mentioning any stupid school moments.


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## Commiecomrade (Jan 10, 2011)

"Riot is R-O-I-T, right?"; while trying to play Scrabble.


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## Zerig (Jan 10, 2011)

My freshman year some kid started jerking it in class.

He wasn't even discreet about it, he just whipped it out and went to town.

The teacher freaked out and told him to stop, but he just kept going. 

That was a good day.


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## Xenke (Jan 10, 2011)

Zerig said:


> My freshman year some kid started jerking it in class.
> 
> He wasn't even discreet about it, he just whipped it out and went to town.
> 
> ...


 
I've heard this story before.


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## Zerig (Jan 10, 2011)

Xenke said:


> I've heard this story before.



I never posted it before. 

Is it a common occurrence?


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## Tewin Follow (Jan 10, 2011)

Zerig said:


> My freshman year some kid started jerking it in class.
> 
> He wasn't even discreet about it, he just whipped it out and went to town.
> 
> ...



I take it he has some social...problems?


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## Xenke (Jan 10, 2011)

Zerig said:


> I never posted it before.
> 
> Is it a common occurrence?


 
I guess so.


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## Zerig (Jan 10, 2011)

Harebelle said:


> I take it he has some social...problems?


 
Probably. 

He barely got in trouble, so I assume the school thought he was retarded or something.


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## Jw (Jan 10, 2011)

7th grade, a boy in the class had his turn to read a paragraph come up. He had some reading problems, obviously, but we just went with it. 
"A creature will be important enough in his niche as long as the right quan-TITTY of resources--"
The word was quantity.

8th grade another guy was reading in my science class and come upon the word "organism". Here's what he read-- "The genetic code for any orgasm is built into the DNA, deoxycodone-nuclear acid." The teacher actually had to leave the classroom because she was laughing at the kid to the point of crying.


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## Monster. (Jan 10, 2011)

3rd grade: The "smart" kid in class made a mathematical mistake that anyone else would have made; instead of just laughing about it and fixing his mistake, he screamed so hard that his face turned red and he shat himself. To explain, he said: "My anger made my bowels rupture and force fecal matter from my poo-hole."

9th grade: In biology, the teacher called on this one kid who never did his work to read aloud from the animal biology book we were reviewing. As he started, he stopped and suddenly shouted out, "This fucking book has dicks everywhere!" The teacher dismissed him for being immature about animals. He retaliated with, "Why can't *I* let my dick hang out like that horse?! THAT MOTHER FUCKER WAS HUGE!" He was then escorted from the classroom by a CST.


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## Machine (Jan 10, 2011)

I've lost so much respect for dipshits in my life that I can't remember half of the stupid things I have overheard.


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## Enwon (Jan 10, 2011)

8th grade, to me in Life Skills class
Dumbass: "Dude, like stop using big words."
Me: "Interesting is not a big word"
Dumbass: "Yeah it is."

9th grade, to me in Art
Redneck: "You should read Glenn Beck's books.  He actually has some pretty good, solid, logical points that you might like."

9th grade, schizophrenic substitute teacher to my group in Biology
Friend: "Hey, can we eat the goldfish for this experiment?"
Substitute: "I don't care if you sneak one before it's been on the table.  But if it's been on the table, it will become contaminated with residues from your privates.  Then you can't eat it.  This goldfish counting experiment you're doing is essential to the future of the world... lots of things are happening out there.  I should know... I'm related to Al Gore."

10th grade, chemistry
Annoying loud girl: "Hey I shouldn't have to do assignments in here!  It's not fair to make us take a quiz!"
Teacher: "Maybe you should stop talking all the time and actually pay attention."
Annoying loud girl: "Maybe you shouldn't be so unfair!"


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## Cam (Jan 10, 2011)

*Music Theory class*

(Girl who is attempting to play the drums)

Dumdum: Hey whats this thing down here?
*Looks down*
Cam: Thats a kick pedal
Dumdum: Oh... how do you use it?
*._.*


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## Catilda Lily (Jan 10, 2011)

Nothing really stupid but in 9th grade we had an essay and one of the people in class wrote something about giving the shirt off their back for someone but they forgot the R in shirt.


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## Leafblower29 (Jan 10, 2011)

jwmcd2 said:


> 8th grade another guy was reading in my science class and come upon the word "organism". Here's what he read-- "The genetic code for any orgasm is built into the DNA, deoxycodone-nuclear acid." The teacher actually had to leave the classroom because she was laughing at the kid to the point of crying.


That same type of mistake happened to almost everyone I know.


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## eversleep (Jan 10, 2011)

Lol, my brother jerked in biology class once. xD But he put his jacket over it so no one saw, but I'm betting some people noticed.
Also, another story:
~Kindergarten, some kid raises his hand and says "My butt itches." The teacher's like "What!?". The kid repeats "My butt itches." The whole lot of 5-year-olds begins to laugh hysterically and the teacher says "Go sit in that chair over there." (we were sittin on the floor at the time, it was like story time or something). So the kid goes and sits in the chair, and he was like squirming around trying to scatch himself against the chair. -.-
~In 10th grade history, the same girl who thought people in England still dressed like it was the 1700's, said "I'm too ignorant to have ugly friends.". Besides the fact that sentence doesn't even make sense, this girl was a real piece of work. One day when my friend was absent from class, the girl began saying shit about how ugly my friend was and how she should kill herself or something. Also this girl really hated lesbians for some reason.


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## 2112 (Jan 10, 2011)

I was in Theatre, and the improv topic a girl drew was "zombie attack".  As she acted out being slowly devoured, she screamed out, "Oh my God it's tearing my scrotum off!"  Obviously, she didn't know what the word meant, and we all tactfully enlightened her at the end of the period.

Also, when I was a T.A. for an A.P. English Class(emphasis on the A.P.; it makes this all the more shocking), I was grading people's _To Kill a Mockingbird_ question packets.  In response to "Why did some townsfolk dislike Atticus Finch?", a student responds, "Atticus was hated by everyone for defending a white negro."


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## Enwon (Jan 10, 2011)

9th and 10th grade:

There is a guy who had the locker above mine.  He was fat and ginger and talked with the most aggravating voice ever.  I could explain to you why he's an idiot, but you know what, quotes work better:
"Yeah, Micheal Moore is good reading.  After all, what he teaches is the truth."

"You should join me for Christian club every week.  We need to celebrate God and creationism and defend this nation from the evil evolutionist idiots."

"You're an atheist?  Well, we can change you to realize the truth of God's love."

"You should join me for this creationist seminar.  Now that's real science!  Not that evolution bull-crap.  Be open minded so that you can see how wrong you are."

"I'm wearing this kilt to school every day because I love Scotland."

*confederacy songs* "Support the Confederacy.  They were right in the Civil War, after all.  The North was oppressing them unfairly.  I love the South- that's the REAL America."

"I'm doing a presentation on socialized medicine.  I got all of my research and cited sources from Micheal Moore."

HOW CAN SOMEONE ACTUALLY HAVE THAT SET OF VIEWPOINTS?!!!!!  AGGGH!!!!!


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## eversleep (Jan 10, 2011)

2112 said:


> white negro."


There was a wigger in that story!? I need to re-read it. Didn't know they existed back in that time period.

Also posting more since I just remembered them.

~12th grade. This girl was just so stupid. People always mistake her for her identical twin sister and she complains "I don't get why people always get us mixed up! We look nothing alike!". 

~Same girl. These kids were messing with how stupid she is, telling her to point out random countries on a globe. "I bet you don't know where China is!" one kid taunts. "Yes I do" the girl begins. "It's down from us, right?". To which the kids facepalm and remind her that the word she's looking for is South, not "down", and also they tell her she's either completely wrong or has the globe tilted. For shits and giggles, they ask her to locate Narnia. She actually tries to. Then they ask her to locate Vatican City, and she exclaims "I'm not falling for that! It's not a real place!".

~Some kid in 10th grade says "Michael Jackson was a singer!?". A girl replies "Well duh! How do you not know who Michael Jackson is!?". The kid replies "Oh... I thought he was just famous for molesting children.".


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## HillyRoars (Jan 11, 2011)

11th grade American history class we were doing review practice test questions in groups about the presidents well this truthfully ditzy freshman slut is sitting behind me mumbling something about hats then she raises her hand to ask "CAN presidents wear hats?".... the teach just stood there kind dumbfounded for a sec then a bunch of people were like "Abe?" 

Things like this everyday make me sad :C


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## HillyRoars (Jan 11, 2011)

12th grade A kid in class had us do a survey for her speech class.  A kid after reading questions 1- Doesn't know what a sweat shop is and 2- How the US and veitnam have anything to do with each other...even worse atlease 60% of the class had no idea aswell along with other things on the survey.


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## Love! (Jan 11, 2011)

i don't remember any details
but there was this one girl in a math class i took who always said something stupid anytime she opened her mouth
and then the teacher made her sit in the corner for it
it got to the point where the teacher didn't even bother calling on her
he'd just point at her and shout 'corner!!' anytime she put her hand up

that was a good year


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## Yrr (Jan 11, 2011)

American school systems need actual funding.


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## LupineLove (Jan 11, 2011)

I'm honestly glad I graduated from public school. The school systems, especially the ones in the south where I live, are horribly poor. The school board in my county basically says the schools are broke, and yet they get a $50k raise. So, apparently, hypocrisy is the new American way.


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## Leafblower29 (Jan 11, 2011)

The other day someone said "You is ignorant."


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## Pine (Jan 11, 2011)

10th Grade Biology
Teacher: "Spontaneous Combustion is impossible because most of the human's body is made of water!"
Dumbass: "What if it's like a disease that makes your blood like gas or something?"

11th Grade Choir
Christfag: Men should not have long hair, it goes against the bible.
Me: Didn't Jesus have long hair?
Christfag: *Yeah but Jesus was pure.*

8th Grade English
Dumbass Reading: the hairs...on the b-back of his...n-neck..._erected_...<cracks><laughs>


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## Gavrill (Jan 11, 2011)

Collective stupidity: I was the only one reading _The Lady, Or The Tiger?_ aloud in 7th grade English because no one else had any idea what the story was talking about (or just didn't care).


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## 2112 (Jan 11, 2011)

eversleep said:


> ~12th grade. This girl was just so stupid. People always mistake her for her identical twin sister and she complains "I don't get why people always get us mixed up! We look nothing alike!".



The other ones were stupid, but I'll admit, being an identical twin, this one really does get on my nerves.  I mean, I'm used to the mix-up by now, but it sucks to not even be acknowledged as the right person on a daily basis.  I've had whole conversations with strangers because they were in my sister's class.

But yeah, while on-topic, I just remembered something stupid that I personally did in my sophomore year.  My only part in Julius Caesar was the Soothsayer, and he had about two lines.  The first was the infamous "Beware the ides of March..."  I managed to fuck up my only line by saying "Beware the* ideas* of March."


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## eversleep (Jan 11, 2011)

2112 said:


> But yeah, while on-topic, I just remembered something stupid that I personally did in my sophomore year.  My only part in Julius Caesar was the Soothsayer, and he had about two lines.  The first was the infamous "Beware the ides of March..."  I managed to fuck up my only line by saying "Beware the* ideas* of March."


I <3'd Julius Caesar. I was Cassius. >:3


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## Karimah (Jan 11, 2011)

In college (which alone makes this story worse), in my Liberal Arts: Visual Arts class the teacher asks, "What did the Greeks inspire in us as Americans that has been such a prominent part of our culture to this day?"

Immediately I raise my hand, knowing that the answer is, you guessed it, democracy. However, instead of calling me he goes around the room, the responses were as follows:

"Statues?"
"The Olympics?"
"Plumbing and architecture?"

And finally, as I'm practically standing out of my chair with my hand raised he calls on one kid that shakily guesses, "D...democracy?" I wanted to smack all of them.


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## Heliophobic (Jan 11, 2011)

jwmcd2 said:


> The teacher actually had to leave the classroom because she was laughing at the kid to the point of crying.


 
Was said teacher twelve years old? >_>


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## Love! (Jan 11, 2011)

Yrr said:


> American school systems need actual funding.


 you're from the uk
you've never been within 500 miles of our school system
you're not allowed to comment on it
get the picture?


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## Heliophobic (Jan 11, 2011)

This happened somewhere this October.

I was sitting at a table in study hall with my friend. He told me to sit next to him so I could see something (we were sitting across from each other). He pointed to the table that was formerly behind me. This girl was jacking some guy's dick off for the entire period. Just casually stroking his shlong. They were both talking to the other people at their table, and looked as if this wasn't even happening. When the bell rung, we all stood up. He forgot to put his cock back in his pants.

'Nuff said.


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## Tewin Follow (Jan 11, 2011)

Grycho said:


> Was said teacher twelve years old? >_>


 
Sure sounds like it. :\

These stories are really too much.


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## Commiecomrade (Jan 11, 2011)

Love! said:


> you're from the uk
> you've never been within 500 miles of our school system
> you're not allowed to comment on it
> get the picture?


 
I'm in America.
I'm in the school system.
I'm allowed to comment on it.
It needs some actual funding.


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## Love! (Jan 11, 2011)

Commiecomrade said:


> I'm in America.
> I'm in the school system.
> I'm allowed to comment on it.
> It needs some actual funding.


 maybe you should do some research
the united states of america spends more money on public education than any other country in the world
and yet we have people like you running around willy-nilly--
that is, people who think being able to talk and type automatically makes them qualified to have an opinion on something

the problem isn't too little money
the problem is too much bullshit:
bullshit teaching methods and bullshit curricula adopted and enforced by bullshit school boards


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## Leafblower29 (Jan 11, 2011)

The issue is the people who run the schools in the U.S. are greedy.


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## Love! (Jan 11, 2011)

Leafblower29 said:


> The issue is the people who run the schools in the U.S. are incompetent.


look, i fixed that for you
do try to learn the difference


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## Calemeyr (Jan 12, 2011)

I've seen kids goofing off in class not giving a damn. I learned quite well in my school, but I see these kids just don't care. Sometimes the school environment is to blame, sometimes it's home, and other times its just the kids are lazy good for nothings. 

This third category is comprised of Paris Hiltons, kids who rebel against their parents because they didn't buy them a hummer, and the chronically untalented. The first group will end up leeching off their rich parents while not contributing anything to society. The second will be kidnapped, mugged, or will get lost after running away from their upper-middle class homes. The third class will become professional slackers. Generally it's environmental, but sometimes it's the kids, who just need a good slap on the face.


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## Leafblower29 (Jan 12, 2011)

Love! said:


> Look, I fixed that for you.
> Do try to learn the difference.


 Fixed.


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## BRN (Jan 12, 2011)

> maybe you should do some research
> *the united states of america spends more money on public education than any other country in the world*
> and yet we have people like you running around willy-nilly--
> that is, people who think being able to talk and type automatically makes them qualified to have an opinion on something


*Citation needed!*
Furthermore, if you're implying that throwing money at something makes it good, then you're not too bright. It's the efficiency with which the money is used; how much of that budget is used on buying software - and how much of that budget is used on teaching the teachers to utilize its potential? Not only that, but you have to disregard the actual volume of the budget and ask - how much cash is available per student? $1m dollars doesn't do much when you've got a few thousand students.



> the problem isn't too little money
> the problem is too much bullshit:
> bullshit teaching methods and bullshit curricula adopted and enforced by bullshit school boards


 
Perhaps you'd be better off in charge; how many hours per week should a school devote to sciences, mathematics, literacy-? Modern languages? How would this time be best applied in each lesson?
Define bullshit, or else you're just in denial about your social standing in school and blaming the curricula for your failings in friendships.



> look, i fixed that for you
> do try to learn the difference


Interesting bard, chap, and a useful, informative, and constructive argument.


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## BRN (Jan 12, 2011)

For interest's sake I took your hypocritical challenge to 'do some actual research'.

You're not top in either primary or secondary school spending.

Care to share what makes you 'qualified to have an opinion' on education?


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## Adelio Altomar (Jan 12, 2011)

10th grade geometry class:

Me, seeking some interesting discussion: "So who would you vote for in the Democratic primaries?"
This dumb chick: "The giiiirl!"
Me: "Uh... why, then?"
Chick: "'Cause she's a giiiirl!"
Me: *rolls eyes*

11th grade:

I'm talking with this one person about Bush (then-president, after '08 election) and about how the democrats are finally going into power again and all that malarkey about how we're going to take a step in the right direction again and then she interjects, "No, that can't be good. 'Cause Democrat is what Bush and Bush is evil!"

I simply sighed and walked off. Never spoke to that person again. 

12th grade health science:

-I got stuck in a class with a bunch of sophomores and freshman who LOVE to talk about how the world is ending in 2012 and all that bullshit. I can't understand why they'd believe that shit. 

Same class and year:
Some right-wing, conservative idiot: "You do realize homosexuality is wrong and that it's just gross."
Me: *I just look at him*
Him: "So... are you gay?"
Me: "Why do you care?" -_-
Him: "I don't. Just asking."

There's plenty more. I should probably write a journal about it sometime.


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## Don (Jan 12, 2011)

Adelio Altomar said:


> 10th grade geometry class:
> Me, seeking some interesting discussion: "So who would you vote for in the Democratic primaries?"
> This dumb chick: "The giiiirl!"
> Me: "Uh... why, then?"
> ...



I've heard this atrocity myself, though it was for Obama because he was black.


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## Torrijos-sama (Jan 12, 2011)

-Were the Wobblies were the inspiration for Weebles?
-Did Karl Marx have any brothers in vaudeville?
-We should attack the Russians for attacking Atlanta.( 2008, during the South Ossetia war in Georgia, the country)
-North Korea is democrat, right?

*25 minute discussion of Alaska: 

prim. "I've been to Alaska before."
sec. "What part?"
prim. "Vancouver."


These are all reasons that I support conservatives.

I don't want any of my income going towards the wellbeing of these monumental RETARDS, regardless of their race, gender, religious affiliation, familial relationship, or political convictions.


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## Yrr (Jan 12, 2011)

Oh cool, I started an argument.

I love it when Americans get all defensive~


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## Leafblower29 (Jan 12, 2011)

Adelio Altomar said:


> Some right-wing, conservative idiot: "You do realize homosexuality is wrong and that it's just gross."
> Me: *I just look at him*
> Him: "So... are you gay?"
> Me: "Why do you care?" -_-
> Him: "I don't. Just asking."


So it's bad for some guys to not like it in the butt?


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## BRN (Jan 12, 2011)

Leafblower29 said:


> So it's bad for some guys to not like it in the butt?


 
It was that he said he didn't care about his sexuality - right after telling him that ass is 'wrong and just gross'. Or at least, that's what I took from it.

It's similar to anti-semitics saying "Jews are vile leechers of the earth. Oh, by the way, if you're a Jew, you can tell me, I don't mind."


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## RogueSareth (Jan 12, 2011)

This didn't happen at school but rather out at my birthday dinner several years ago at the local japanese resturant. Our waitress came up and was talking to us and saying how she hoped the cook didn't swear too much because he had a habit of it, but it was ok because he was a ballroom dancer. She herself couldn't dance and had "two left feet" my sister being the blonde she is asked the waitress how she bought shoes >.< and my cousin being the smartass he is said she had to buy two pairs of the same shoe and throw the right ones out. My sister though he was serious -_-


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## Digitalpotato (Jan 12, 2011)

Jared said:


> He can't have been serious.


 
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_f4v3-UWxr...AAAEA/PX0QJs2Nlfo/s1600/SMG_King_Leonidas.jpg

THIS. IS. SUBWAY. 

There is something about the site that causes most people to suddenly shut off half their brain the second they enter. I think it's something in the cleaning material, because it also causes most people to shut off the part of the brain that has them remember manners, too.


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## WolfGuy100 (Jan 12, 2011)

10th grade: I was in World History with my ex-friend (thanks goodness...I hate that guy. He doesn't know though), I heard a clamor of his "friends" pressuring him into doing the worm. Good thing he's a very very STUPID person, he just went ahead and do it. Except, it was really a worm dance, it was just more like...fish flopping on dry surface. :V Everybody laughed in the class and I just facepalmed. 

Good thing I don't see him much.


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## Love! (Jan 13, 2011)

SIX said:


> *Citation needed!*
> Furthermore, if you're implying that throwing money at something makes it good, then you're not too bright.


That's the exact opposite of the point I was making. Now who's not too bright?


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## Love! (Jan 13, 2011)

Okay, this entire post is serious business. If you were hoping for cutesy space-case Love!, don't bother reading it. There are few things I hate more than non-Americans acting like they know how to fix America. They're like those obnoxious people who constantly give unwanted advice to new parents.

Picking up where I left off...



SIX said:


> It's the efficiency with which the money is used; how  much of that budget is used on buying software - and how much of that  budget is used on teaching the teachers to utilize its  potential?


More importantly, how do you figure that receiving money makes people smarter?



> Not only that, but you have to disregard the actual volume of the  budget and ask - how much cash is available per student? $1m dollars  doesn't do much when you've got a few thousand students.


Is it your superior British education that lets you so readily point out the obvious? Or are you simply more condescending than even myself?



> Perhaps  you'd be better off in charge; how many hours per week should a school  devote to sciences, mathematics, literacy-? Modern languages? How would  this time be best applied in each lesson?


Ha, ha, ha. "Since you obviously have all the answers, let's put you in charge!"
FYI: That's not an argument. That's not a counterpoint. That's not a rebuttal. That's pure arrogance, and nothing more. Nobody has all the answers--but, as a wise man once said "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten." And what the USA always does is throw money at problems expecting them to go away. Maybe that works in jolly old England, but it doesn't work here.



> Define bullshit


Oh, gee, I don't know. Off the top of my head I can think of these bullshit subjects...
-Intelligent Design [Approved by many, many school boards in the United States.]
-Public Speaking
-Physical Education
-"Self-Esteem" [Did you know teachers _aren't allowed_ to use red pen to grade things anymore?]
-"Character Education" [For starters, what does that even _mean?_]

As for bullshit teaching _methods_, well...
-Endless ditto sheets [Excuse me, but aren't _you_ supposed to be teaching the class, rather than Xerox?]
-Endless homework [Various studies have shown that homework is not a  good learning tool. Practice makes perfect, but three hours of homework a  night is overkill.]
-Group projects [The smart kids end up doing all the work, and the useless people just coast. NS]
-Channel One News [I don't know what they call it at other schools, or  if it's even shown, but nobody actually bothered watching that program  when I was in school. Most teenagers don't care what's going on in the  world until they get older, and the ones who do will generally find time  to watch the news on their own.]
-Block scheduling [Unfortunately, there is only so much you can learn  per day in any given subject. Besides that, work expands to fill the  allotted time, so longer periods just mean students will waste more time  and learn less.]

Finally, these aren't easy to rattle off in list form, but schools do a  terrible job teaching history and civics in general. Obviously, this is  good for the establishment [though I do not pretend this is part of some  conspiracy; widespread apathy in general is innately beneficial to  governments] and bad for the people. But the United States, despite  having been a nation for just 235 years this July, has at one point or  another stood toe to toe with every major world power, endured quite a  few economic crises, survived a civil war over the issue of secession,  and even threw out its first constitution and started over _from scratch_,  while at the same time being one of the first experiments in limited  government, representative democracy, free press, free speech, life,  liberty, property, and the pursuit of happiness. There is nothing  inherently _boring_ about that, and I strongly question the patriotism of any teacher who cannot or will not hammer home the idea that  the very existence of this country--even with all the growing pains it's  going through now--is equal parts miracle and masterpiece. No, despite  what the textbooks may say, the founding fathers weren't perfect, the  government isn't perfect, our origins as a nation aren't perfect, but  history cannot justifiably be taught to children the way it is now--as  lies from kindergarten to high school, and as dull reminiscences from  then to graduation. Nor can civics, in a country where fewer than 50% of  eligible voters even turn out to the national elections, and almost  nobody keeps up with state and local politics, which are vastly more  important from a day-to-day standpoint.

This kind of apathy doesn't happen in a vacuum. Some people say learning  should be fun, and I tend to agree with that. Some people also say that  it's easiest to have fun with something when you're good at it, and I  mostly agree with that, too. But natural talent only goes so far; when  schools fail the gifted, the normal, and the needy alike, that's when  only fools and liars will shout down anyone who argues against the Way  Things Are while flashing each other the O.K. Bunny behind their backs.

Then again, you don't live in the United States, so you don't actually know anything about what's going on here.



> or else you're just in denial about your social standing in  school and blaming the curricula for your failings in  friendships.


Why, exactly, is my assertion that throwing money at problems doesn't  solve them so offensive to you? Or are you, perhaps, merely angry that I don't immediately accept you as America's one and only savior just because you happen to _live in Europe_?



Yrr said:


> Oh cool, I started an argument.
> 
> I love it when Americans get all defensive~


 While you and your countrymen will never match Americans in military might, idealism, natural resources, labor, patriotism,  population, or raw land area, I will readily admit that the British  remain unmatched in the field of being ignorant assholes.


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Jan 13, 2011)

Reading these are really making my day. 




Leafblower29 said:


> So it's bad for some guys to not like it in the butt?


 
Boy, you misunderstood that. -_-




SIX said:


> It was that he said he didn't care about his sexuality - right after telling him that ass is 'wrong and just gross'. Or at least, that's what I took from it.
> 
> It's similar to anti-semitics saying "Jews are vile leechers of the earth. Oh, by the way, if you're a Jew, you can tell me, I don't mind."


 

Pretty much this. Why express your disgust with gays and then outright ask me if I am one right afterwards? I certainly ain't gonna tell ya! :V


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## Randy-Darkshade (Jan 13, 2011)

Love! said:


> maybe you should do some research
> the united states of america spends more money on public education than any other country in the world
> and yet we have people like you running around willy-nilly--
> that is, people who think being able to talk and type automatically makes them qualified to have an opinion on something
> ...



I know we had a disagreement in another thread, but I have to agree here.


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## Love! (Jan 13, 2011)

RandyDarkshade said:


> I know we had a disagreement in another thread, but I have to agree here.


that's fine by me
what happens in another thread, stays in another thread


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## furvien (Jan 13, 2011)

3rd year we were all in art class and a guy we all knew went past the door with his arms loaded high with books we hear him drop all the books and then a great big neardy scream of "myyyyyyyy knnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesss!!!" we were laughing for the rest of the class...


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## Clutch (Jan 13, 2011)

As a madder a Fact, today in art class this girl was at the sink to clean off her paint pallet. When all of a Sudden she blurred out "F**K! I got paint on my new shirt" the teacher is like "Falesha, stop cursing in my art class." She then said, "No it's a brand new shirt and your stupid paint bottle was loose and spilled paint on my shirt, and now your Gonna have to buy me a new Shirt".


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## Monster. (Jan 13, 2011)

Clutch said:


> As a madder a Fact, today in art class this girl was at the sink to clean off her paint pallet. When all of a Sudden she blurred out "F**K! I got paint on my new shirt" the teacher is like "Falesha, stop cursing in my art class." She then said, "No it's a brand new shirt and your stupid paint bottle was loose and spilled paint on my shirt, and now your Gonna have to buy me a new Shirt".


 
Why the fuck do prissy girls feel the need to dress up all pretty when they know they have a class that's probably going to be messy?

(To stay on topic) I walked into class late one day and told my teacher that I woke up late. This idiot girl in my class who was desperate to be my friend told me, "Set your alarm to call me and wake you up!"


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## Qoph (Jan 13, 2011)

Stay on topic, if you want to debate education do it somewhere else.


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## Commiecomrade (Jan 13, 2011)

Love! said:


> maybe you should do some research
> the united states of america spends more money on public education than any other country in the world
> and yet we have people like you running around willy-nilly--
> that is, people who think being able to talk and type automatically makes them qualified to have an opinion on something
> ...


 
I said it needs some _ACTUAL_ funding. As in, not spending literally $2 million on a press box for the football stadium. (that's happening in my school and is the sole reason I posted what I said) 


Love! said:


> that is, people who think being able to talk and type automatically makes them qualified to have an opinion on something


 
What makes you more qualified? Didn't you just say that someone needed to be from America to be able to have an opinion?


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## WindieDragon (Jan 13, 2011)

7th grade science class. We were talking about solar and lunar eclipses. I'm not sure why the teacher felt the need to say what everyone already knows, but she did anyway. She had a standing sun-on-a stick model and an earth and moon in either hand and positioned them as she talked.

teacher goes "When the earth gets between the sun and moon, you get a lunar eclipse, and when the moon gets between the sun and earth you get a solar eclipse."
everyone else in the class including myself go "well DUH" in our heads, but the room remains silent as we continue to listen to her lecture.
retarded kid raises his hand and asks "But what would happen if the sun got between the earth and the moon?"
Cue the wave of stifled laughter, and "oh my God" looks. xD

Even the teacher had to pause, probably to stifle her laughter, before telling him that nothing would happen.


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## Echotheduckyman (Jan 13, 2011)

well last semester (im in 12th grade) Someone thought Hitler was a communist  

I cried all over the place D:<


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## MaverickCowboy (Jan 14, 2011)

Echotheduckyman said:


> well last semester (im in 12th grade) Someone thought Hitler was a communist
> 
> I cried all over the place D:<


 
Technically, part of a Socialist movement. But COMMUNIST is a far strech in the scheme of things.

Holy shit. did he masturbate to Palin?


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## Qoph (Jan 14, 2011)

I don't want to close this thread 'cause it's entertaining, but this is the last warning before I close it and give warnings/infractions.  Keep in on topic.


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## Love! (Jan 14, 2011)

one time in biology class
these two girls were discussing what they'd bring to a tropical island if they had to be stranded on one
one of them suggested chickens, and the other liked that idea, but then they realized they had no idea what the chickens would eat there
so finally
after much hand-wringing
they decided "well, the chickens can eat fish!"



Qoph said:


> I don't want to close this thread 'cause it's entertaining, but this is the last warning before I close it and give warnings/infractions.  Keep in on topic.


 I would like to protest this threat, on the grounds that the thread is moving in a logical and natural direction here. Stupid people in schools don't just appear there out of the blue. There is always an underlying for their idiocy, and many times it is the educational system itself.

If I recall correctly, the forum rules allow for constructive drift, and I would like to submit that this discussion, while perhaps not the most civil, qualifies as constructive drift. We certainly haven't moved into "Osama bin Laden at Valley Forge" territory, and, frankly, perhaps all of three people in this thread are even arguing over education, so it's not derailment.

Closing the thread because of little old us is like smashing a walnut with a pile driver because you can't find the nutcracker, and giving infractions to people for engaging in a sub-discussion that simply doesn't seem to bother any of the normal users...well, that just seems a tad arbitrary.

EDIT: Oh, look, he already deleted the discussion. Well, I've learned my lesson. Seems the entire point of this forum is to entertain Qoph, everybody.


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## Sir Section 8 (Jan 14, 2011)

10th grade: We were getting ready to do a Latin quiz, on the translations for the words *"This/That"* and the moron sitting next to me is studying *vocab* in the book. The teacher walked up and asked "What are you doing?" -"Studying for the quiz today." to which the teacher almost cried laughing.

8th grade: I'm sitting there in class and my teacher who is *black* hears a bunch of kids goofing around outside the room, she walks outside and she questions them on why they are skipping since they were obviously not on some errand to which the kid answers "YOU SAYING WE'RE SKIPPING BECAUSE WE'RE BLACK!?" 

10th grade: We're in Latin class and the teach is telling us how he is starting to quit smoking, on day 3, he tells us not to smoke because it sucks. He asked rhitorically "You guys don't smoke do you?" to which the moron from story #1 answered "I don't smoke..._Cigarettes_." and Nike replied to that "That explains _*EVERYTHING*_."


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## Digitalpotato (Jan 15, 2011)

MaverickCowboy said:


> Technically, part of a Socialist movement. But COMMUNIST is a far strech in the scheme of things.
> 
> Holy shit. did he masturbate to Palin?


 
Worthless fact: Hitler was more right-winged - the socialism was in name only. :lol:I've seen some pretty weird...stuff like calling the current scapegoa-I mean President a "Communist Nazi". (People did this to Clinton and Bush, too.)


Lessee other stupid things I've seen in CSU:


Someone came up and walked right into the bar where wer serve the food - sandwich vein or whatever, that's what we call it. I asked if he was okay and he didn't respond, he kept trying to walk through it like this was Morrowind. He then said, "Maaaan this wasn't here the last time I was in engineering!


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## tonecameg (Jan 17, 2011)

8th grade, Physics -  Girl spoke out and legitimately asked if people in Australia could "feel and see everything upside down".

I still miss public school sometimes though ];


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## NA3LKER (Jan 17, 2011)

most of the time its me doin the stupid thing. my biology teacher and most of the class were talking about babies today, and i raised my hand after about 5 minuites and said "i dont give a shit about babies, can we talk about DNA now?"


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## Jashwa (Jan 17, 2011)

It always perplexes me when I find stupid people at my school. Seriously, the university loves to brag about how we're some of the brightest and best students and how we legitly decline people with perfect SAT scores and 4.0 GPA's, but there are still people here that I would be surprised if they graduated high school with over a 3.0. Mind numbingly stupid people that are here instead of brilliant people who just didn't have enough extracurricular activities. It's a shame.


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## Thou Dog (Jan 17, 2011)

The National Socialist German Workers Party was nationalist and corporatist in its philosophy. It didn't offer anything to actual, you know, workers.

It was socialist in name only.

You're not with the AFA, are you


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## A10pex (Jan 17, 2011)

You know, I don't really blame the school as much as that parents. It's a common misconception that if the student fails to learn then it's the teachers fault, nope it's mostly the kid, who just sits there and does nothing, where did he learn laziness. Ta-da the parents!


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## eversleep (Jan 17, 2011)

Forgot to mention a stupid girl Jessica in Jr. High. 

7th grade: She was late to class. The teacher asks "Why are you late?". Rather than making up a good excuse, Jessica says "I was watching the fight in the hallway." Then the teacher makes a face like :| and writes her up.

8th grade: Same girl was always really bitchy to the teacher and everyone pretty much hated her. Anyway one day we were using hot glue guns (it was woodshoppe class) and she squirts it onto her hand and yells "Ow it's hot!".


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## Love! (Jan 17, 2011)

A10pex said:


> You know, I don't really blame the school as much as that parents. It's a common misconception that if the student fails to learn then it's the teachers fault, nope it's mostly the kid, who just sits there and does nothing, where did he learn laziness. Ta-da the parents!


you're homeschooled, aren't you?



Jashwa said:


> It always perplexes me when I find stupid people  at my school. Seriously, the university loves to brag about how we're  some of the brightest and best students and how we legitly decline  people with perfect SAT scores and 4.0 GPA's, but there are still people  here that I would be surprised if they graduated high school with over a  3.0. Mind numbingly stupid people that are here instead of brilliant  people who just didn't have enough extracurricular activities. It's a  shame.


 affirmative action at work :v


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## Cam (Jan 17, 2011)

Its even funnier when the stupid people are the teachers. Especially the substitutes, I have a bad habit of harassing substitute teachers :3c

In my sophomore year, all I would do is fuck with my english teacher, because she was the most stereotypical blonde woman in the whole school. She just got finished writing a bunch of shit on the board when I told her "Ms coughlin, you accidentally the _whole_ board"

And what made it even greater was that the _entire_ class decided to roll along with it. Everyones yelling at her how she accidentally her whole writing. She kept erasing and rewriting, but we'd always just keep doing it over and over again :3


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## Adelio Altomar (Jan 17, 2011)

Cam said:


> Its even funnier when the stupid people are the teachers. Especially the substitutes, I have a bad habit of harassing substitute teachers :3c
> 
> In my sophomore year, all I would do is fuck with my english teacher, because she was the most stereotypical blonde woman in the whole school. She just got finished writing a bunch of shit on the board when I told her "Ms coughlin, you accidentally the _whole_ board"
> 
> And what made it even greater was that the _entire_ class decided to roll along with it. Everyones yelling at her how she accidentally her whole writing. She kept erasing and rewriting, but we'd always just keep doing it over and over again :3


 
This made my evening. Wish I could've seen that. xD


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## Thou Dog (Jan 17, 2011)

Awww. It's not nice to mess with teachers' heads unless they actually deserved it.

My high school had a number of serious professional teachers (Mr. Cohen, Dr. Dorhoffer, etc. were veterans of the NY school system before they were hired) but it also hired new teachers, if they came well-recommended or were well-suited to teaching a particular subject.

For example, our English Lit teacher in junior year - a really easy-going woman, eager to teach. She knew a lot about English lit, but she was better at reading and writing literary English than at speaking English, her second language. She spoke Afrikaans and... well, one of the languages with clicks in it, but while her English was fluent, she would get the idioms wrong. E.g., she once described having an argument with her boyfriend, saying that "he gave [her] a mouthful" - instead of an _earful_. We the students cracked up, and then explained the meaning of what she'd said. Her skin was pretty dark, but you could still see the blush!

We also had one Rabbi Hanoch Gez, an amazing man who knows a lot about a lot of things. Very handy fellow, an accomplished carpenter, an excellent butcher, and a serious teacher as well. English is his third language, at least; he grew up in Israel, with Hebrew and Arabic, then moved to a small mountain town in Peru to be the kosher butcher there, where he learned Spanish; and finally he moved to the USA and tried his best to learn English. So, when one of my classmates asked him about the format of an upcoming exam, he was perplexed...

"Rav Gez, what will be the format of Tuesday's test?"
"The test... will be okay."

The highlight of my classes with him, though, was hearing him tell about his combat experience. He was a tank driver. My favorite story was one he told about the tank being attacked by snipers; after a bullet bounced off the commander's helmet, everyone closed their hatches and used periscopes instead of naked eyeballs. Then the snipers took out the periscopes... They had a helicopter crew overhead directing them by radio. Cavalryman Gez was not a good driver, though.


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## A10pex (Jan 17, 2011)

Love! said:


> you're homeschooled, aren't you?
> 
> nope, public school from 1st grade, save for a couple of months in 5th grade. I just figured it out before most people


----------



## Littlerock (Jan 17, 2011)

There's this one older lady that subbed at my high school. You could tell that she'd once been a great teacher, but quickly degraded. Fifty years later, she'd kept in for the pension, and hated _all_ children. She had subbed for an art class I was in one day, it was an honors class, and all the kids in it were there for the art, not the credits. So she writes down some stuff the teacher left for us on the board, and the class gets to it. In this particular class, many students were merged in from a further advanced version of the same (the class would have been cut otherwise) and did not have need to follow said instructions. Namely because it was more-or-less a freelance class, you made whatever came to mind, formed a portfolio, and were graded at the end of the term. 
Naturally, she did not believe these five students. (Myself included.) She concluded that it was a case of 'trying to fool the sub to get out of work', disregarding the entire class backing up our claims. 
So what did she do? Rather than consult the other art teacher, who happened to be good friends with the one that was out (they knew each other's plans all the same), she decided to write up the whole class. _All 32 students_.

And ours was not the only class she's done this too.
She stopped an informative video being played when she had subbed a language class, because she didn't like the outfit the lady on the video was wearing.
She kicked kids out of class for asking serious questions pertaining to lessons, under reasoning of 'stop being a smart ass and pay attention'.
She decided that a class should not work on Power Point Presentations on the last designated work day, because they couldn't be trusted with the internet. 
(To be fair, that last one was a tough call to make. It was a project about SDT's, and the teacher insisted of pictures of said STD's. Literally, disease porn.)


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## Catilda Lily (Jan 17, 2011)

I remember we work working on something in shop and the teacher said something about using elbow grease and my friend asked where to get some.


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## CAThulu (Jan 17, 2011)

every generation has their stupid people.  I call it 'culling the herd'.

I had one teacher in grade 10 set sugar on fire and fill the class with choking smoke before the period 2 bell.  Man, the looks on the faces of the new kids coming in were awesome.

This same teacher had those of us that stayed behind from a field trip pee in beakers, use pipettes that we had to borrow from each other to drop the urine into the test tubes then use a hand cranked centrifuge that acted like one of those circus rides that lift you up using g forces, flinging (Hopefully!) the urine to the back of the tube.

All to show that urine could be separated into uric acid and particulates.  Yay.  Best line of the day, "if you can't procure your own, ask to borrow some from a classmate".   This asshole didn't seem to think about the fact that girls would have a lot harder getting a 'sample' then the guys.  We were very, very pissed off (pardon the pun)

I have dozens of stories about him, from one semester of biology.  he only lasted one year as a science teacher before he was demoted to phys. ed.  And we never let him live that down.


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## Conker (Jan 18, 2011)

One of my teachers asks our class what we know about the Black Panthers as it pertains to a book we'll be reading. One student says they were a crime organization, "like with drugs" and another says "weren't they the black equivalent of the KKK?" 

Both of these people were seniors in college.

:[


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## Tao (Jan 18, 2011)

We are planning on making deviled eggs in my International Cuisine class and somebody asked if it actually had eggs in it. The same person also thought you could microwave eggs instead of boiling them.


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## Monster. (Jan 18, 2011)

Cam said:


> Its even funnier when the stupid people are the teachers. Especially the substitutes, I have a bad habit of harassing substitute teachers :3c
> 
> In my sophomore year, all I would do is fuck with my english teacher, because she was the most stereotypical blonde woman in the whole school. She just got finished writing a bunch of shit on the board when I told her "Ms coughlin, you accidentally the _whole_ board"
> 
> And what made it even greater was that the _entire_ class decided to roll along with it. Everyones yelling at her how she accidentally her whole writing. She kept erasing and rewriting, but we'd always just keep doing it over and over again :3


 I USED TO DO THIS. And I used to have SOOOO much fun. One of the substitutes that always came to the high school at least twice a week was this pathetic dipshit who was 35, single, and living with his older sister and her kids. He used to brag about writing a book and making it big as a writer. I convinced him to show me some of the book he'd been working on for the past couple years...and oh GOD was it bad. I made fun of him for months for bragging about being top of his Writing class in college and how his professors still use his shit in their classes as examples, but clearly being a liar. Ah. Good times.


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## Trance (Jan 18, 2011)

I like the chicks who think Asia and Africa are countries.  


:V


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## cad (Jan 18, 2011)

This thread makes me feel better about myself.


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## Cam (Jan 18, 2011)

Miss Haha said:


> I USED TO DO THIS. And I used to have SOOOO much fun. One of the substitutes that always came to the high school at least twice a week was this pathetic dipshit who was 35, single, and living with his older sister and her kids. He used to brag about writing a book and making it big as a writer. I convinced him to show me some of the book he'd been working on for the past couple years...and oh GOD was it bad. I made fun of him for months for bragging about being top of his Writing class in college and how his professors still use his shit in their classes as examples, but clearly being a liar. Ah. Good times.



Im still convinced that all substitutes have a blacklist, and I am totally at the top of it. 

We used to have this sub who was about 80 years old, and would flip an absolute SHIT if you talked about hip hop. Im talking she would go on like a 15 minute rant about how hip hop is "destroying youth and its cultures"

So whenever I saw her I'd ask her "Whats your favorite eminem song?" I almost got suspended for asking that once too, thats how bad she would freak out.


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## Monster. (Jan 18, 2011)

Cam said:


> Im still convinced that all substitutes have a blacklist, and I am totally at the top of it.
> 
> We used to have this sub who was about 80 years old, and would flip an absolute SHIT if you talked about hip hop. Im talking she would go on like a 15 minute rant about how hip hop is "destroying youth and its cultures"
> 
> So whenever I saw her I'd ask her "Whats your favorite eminem song?" I almost got suspended for asking that once too, thats how bad she would freak out.


 
Ugh, I love it. With that teacher I was talking about, I asked him if he's going to be the next 40 year old virgin or if he'd lost it to his sister yet (as a joke, obviously). He was so pissed off, he sent me straight to the principal, rather than the vice principal.


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## BRN (Jan 18, 2011)

Our Philosophy lecturer is some thirty-something year old guy. Looks twenty. Walks in on a Thursday morning like a bearded stoner and gets right down to talking about our latest discussion; today's was art.

"What is aesthetics-?" he asks, and our resident idiot replies [sincerely] "It's when they put that thing over your mouth to put you to sleep."
I died inside.


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## Monster. (Jan 18, 2011)

SIX said:


> Our Philosophy lecturer is some thirty-something year old guy. Looks twenty. Walks in on a Thursday morning like a bearded stoner and gets right down to talking about our latest discussion; today's was art.
> 
> "What is aesthetics-?" he asks, and our resident idiot replies [sincerely] "It's when they put that thing over your mouth to put you to sleep."
> I died inside.


 
I died along with you just now.


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## cad (Jan 18, 2011)

Oh yeah, one thing happened at school today.
The fire-alarm started and everyone in the building move out of it, thinking it was a fire-drill.
But it wasn't a fire-drill.
Turns out several people saw some guy break the glass to the emergency fire-switch. Oh yeah, and he's on tape too. 
He's pretty much screwed, I think.


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## Roxichu (Jan 18, 2011)

B.P.R.D said:


> Oh yeah, one thing happened at school today.
> The fire-alarm started and everyone in the building move out of it, thinking it was a fire-drill.
> But it wasn't a fire-drill.
> Turns out several people saw some guy break the glass to the emergency fire-switch. Oh yeah, and he's on tape too.
> He's pretty much screwed, I think.


 
Bwahaha, last night someone in my dorm pulled the alarm, so we all had to evacuate and stand out in the January night cold while the fire department came to shut it off.

Of course it was all bullshit, the building is made of concrete anyway and can't catch on fire.

Fire alarms are pretty much worthless unless you're living in a 100-year old wooden shanty.


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## Cam (Jan 18, 2011)

Miss Haha said:


> he sent me straight to the principal, rather than the vice principal.


 
Youre so hardcore

Try getting suspended for a week for deciding it was a good idea to walk in the middle of a history room and scream "ANAL SEX"


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## cad (Jan 18, 2011)

Roxichu said:


> Bwahaha, last night someone in my dorm pulled the alarm, so we all had to evacuate and stand out in the January night cold while the fire department came to shut it off.
> 
> Of course it was all bullshit, the building is made of concrete anyway and can't catch on fire.
> 
> Fire alarms are pretty much worthless unless you're living in a 100-year old wooden shanty.


Even though the building's concrete doesn't mean the fire can't do any substantial damage. The fumes that the flames spawns, for example, is far more deadlier than the flames itself.


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## eversleep (Jan 18, 2011)

TranceFur said:


> I like the chicks who think Asia and Africa are countries.
> 
> 
> :V


 Ah, this reminds me of yet something else:
Teacher asks what the highest peak in the United States is. A kid raises his hand: "China. I know it's China."

Also, going back to the stupid girl Jessica from Jr. High, we had to make power point presentations on the definitions of computer terms and such. She had a picture of a modem on the board and I don't remember exactly how it went but her definition started out "It is an internet".


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## ukbeast (Jan 18, 2011)

> I like the chicks who think Asia and Africa are countries.



I have seen a lot of peers in Indianapolis who thought Africa was a country, when I was educated at North Central High School.
One called me a gay Brit  >-<


----------



## Thou Dog (Jan 18, 2011)

Conker said:


> One of my teachers asks our class what we know about the Black Panthers as it pertains to a book we'll be reading. One student says they were a crime organization, "like with drugs" and another says "weren't they the black equivalent of the KKK?"
> 
> Both of these people were seniors in college.
> 
> :[


 To be fair, that's the portrayal of the Black Panthers that the FBI and other law-enforcement establishments pushed. The idea that a black person could respond to white people's threats of beatings by pulling a gun on them - or that they should be allowed to respond to police brutality with equivalent force - was seen as a threat to law and order.


----------



## Nokly (Jan 18, 2011)

When kids started hitting puberty in my school ( around grade 8 ) there was this one kid who gave a girl chocolate bars everyday so she would show him her underwear during class so he could masturbate.

I was in geography class a few years ago when the teacher said "Does anyone know where Newfoundland is?" one student proceeded to say "Isn't it above Saskatchewan?"


----------



## Jashwa (Jan 18, 2011)

Nokly said:


> When kids started hitting puberty in my school ( around grade 8) there was this one kid who gave a girl chocolate bars everyday so she would show him her underwear during class so he could masturbate.


 That's more creepy and perverted than stupid.


----------



## CAThulu (Jan 18, 2011)

Nokly said:


> When kids started hitting puberty in my school ( around grade 8) there was this one kid who gave a girl chocolate bars everyday so she would show him her underwear during class so he could masturbate.
> 
> I was in geography class a few years ago when the teacher said "Does anyone know where Newfoundland is?" one student proceeded to say "Isn't it above Saskatchewan?"


 
Geography is such a throwaway class too; it's so simple.  Back when Highschool still had Grade 13 (OAC)  we used to call it "OAC Colouring" because of all the maps you had to colour in class.


----------



## Suezotiger (Jan 18, 2011)

7th Grade Science:

We were learning about converting Celsius to Kelvin and the teacher was convinced that you still had to add 273 to the difference in Kelvin to the difference in Celsius. I had to argue with him for about 5 minutes before he realized the differences were the same.

An English Class:

Someone misread 'satin box' as 'Satan box'.


----------



## Nokly (Jan 18, 2011)

When I was in grade 6 I had 3 "permanent" French teachers. My class was so horrible to them, we got the first fired, made the second quit and the year ran out before we got to the third.

In grade 8 most of my class convinced a French teacher to unknowingly show porn to the class

When I was in grade 5 or 6 my French teacher gave me the finger and started apologizing for like 20 minutes, I said it was fine and she continued the lesson. She was showing inappropriate hand gestures to the empty door way when I walked in lol

As you can see I've not had a good history for French teachers ...


----------



## Monster. (Jan 19, 2011)

Cam said:


> Youre so hardcore


 My school was so pathetic that it was considered that. :V



> Try getting suspended for a  week for deciding it was a good idea to walk in the middle of a history  room and scream "ANAL SEX"


 
DUDE I DID THAT. Oh, no, wait, it was TIT-FUCKERRRRRR. But it was more like I was yelling it at someone I saw before I stepped into the classroom and my teacher as like THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY?!


----------



## Nineteen-TwentySeven (Jan 19, 2011)

Nokly said:


> When kids started hitting puberty in my school ( around grade 8 ) there was this one kid who gave a girl chocolate bars everyday so she would show him her underwear during class so he could masturbate.


 
What...what? I think this is how creepy old men are created.

I hated public school. 6th through 10th: Anybody remember "the penis game"? 
I almost wanted to go apeshit and beat them with my shoe it was so bloody fucking stupid.

Not to mention, 9th: Kid behind me asks my (borderline insane) english teacher:
Moron: "How old do you have to be to drop out?"
Teacher: "You have to be sixteen years old" (stickler for proper pronunciation)
Moron: "I am so there. *retard happy face*"


----------



## Gr8fulFox (Jan 19, 2011)

In the 3rd grade, my fresh-out-of-college teacher sent a letter home to my parents about how I wasn't "pulling my weight in class". My father proceeded to correct the mistakes, then mail copies to the teacher, principal, and superintendent.


----------



## Adelio Altomar (Jan 19, 2011)

Nokly said:


> When I was in grade 6 I had 3 "permanent" French teachers. My class was so horrible to them, we got the first fired, made the second quit and the year ran out before we got to the third.
> 
> In grade 8 most of my class convinced a French teacher to unknowingly show porn to the class
> 
> ...


 
You think that's bad? Try dealing with a creepy pedophile-looking and OBVIOUSLY flaming gay French teacher who kept getting uncomfortably close to you and then gets you into deep trouble for trying set boundaries, and was later arrested because it turns he stole about 12K from the school funds. And then the second teacher turns about to be a total wacky whackjob and excessively annoying and pushy. >.<


----------



## Kamau Husky (Jan 19, 2011)

A couple weeks ago while working in my auto class, the principal came over the intercom and 
said that the school was under a code red drill (school lockdown). One of the so called "scholar" mechanics 
screamed, "FIRE!", threw oil everywere and then ran out the door.

Yesterday in history class, my teacher asked what a black market was. The redneck of the class stood up and shouted Walmart.


----------



## Littlerock (Jan 19, 2011)

In my chem class in high school, there was a kid who'd dealt weed. One particular day, it was rumored that drug dogs had been brought to search the school. Worried he'd be caught with it, he took all of the stash he'd had on his person and burnt it over a bunson burner during a lab. The rest of the story tells itself.

Also in high school, I had a total dunce for a Spanish teacher. He'd make us play Spanish scrabble, and of course the only words we used were swears. He'd walk round the room and make sure we were actually playing. He never noticed. The fucker didn't know a word of Spanish.

There was a special-ed Aide hired, and fired during my four years. She knew nothing about helping the kids she was assigned to. One day, scandal broke out when photos of her smoking crack and fucking several students in a local hotel were released. My school got in the headlines for yet another whore.

A security guard was fired too, for boozing out with the kids too. He was actually nice though, so I felt bad about that. He was a very lonely man.


----------



## Monster. (Jan 19, 2011)

barefootfoof said:


> In my chem class in high school, there was a kid who'd dealt weed. One particular day, it was rumored that drug dogs had been brought to search the school. Worried he'd be caught with it, he took all of the stash he'd had on his person and burnt it over a bunson burner during a lab. The rest of the story tells itself.


 
...That's awesome. Some kid at school tried to stash his weed in his girlfriend's purse when he saw police dogs headed for the classroom. It was epic.


----------



## Littlerock (Jan 19, 2011)

Miss Haha said:


> ...That's awesome. Some kid at school tried to stash his weed in his girlfriend's purse when he saw police dogs headed for the classroom. It was epic.


 Lol, what a terrible boyfriend he is. It was even better than it sounds though, smoke rises of course. Guess where the windows open? Not at the top I'll tell you :3c


----------



## Monster. (Jan 19, 2011)

barefootfoof said:


> Lol, what a terrible boyfriend he is. It was even better than it sounds though, smoke rises of course. Guess where the windows open? Not at the top I'll tell you :3c


 
That's too funny.


----------



## Nokly (Jan 19, 2011)

Adelio Altomar said:


> You think that's bad? Try dealing with a creepy pedophile-looking and OBVIOUSLY flaming gay French teacher who kept getting uncomfortably close to you and then gets you into deep trouble for trying set boundaries, and was later arrested because it turns he stole about 12K from the school funds. And then the second teacher turns about to be a total wacky whackjob and excessively annoying and pushy. >.<


 
Oh ya that reminds me! When I was in grade 6 my teacher WAS a pedophile, during gym he would stare down the girl's shirts while the were doing push-ups and that, and if they took to long in the change room he would walk in. Then at the end of the year I moved and my grade 7 teacher was the exact same! the only difference was the the grade 7 teacher had white hair...


----------



## Adenosis Silo (Jan 19, 2011)

This kid walked up to me once and asked me the following:

_"What football team do you support?"_

I didn't think much of it at the time, but looking back I would have probably responded with something along the lines of:

_"You're assuming I DO have a favorite football team? You know, there's this place across the Atlantic Ocean called America, in their schools they ask you important questions like "What church do you go to?" You know, church, that place where people go to worship the guy who created the whole, freaking, UNIVERSE, not some bloke who kicks a ball into a goal post."_


----------



## eversleep (Jan 19, 2011)

Adenosis Silo said:


> This kid walked up to me once and asked me the following:
> 
> _"What football team do you support?"_
> 
> ...


 ...wait wut?

All these sex stories and stories of stupid teachers reminded me of yet more stories (I got a million of 'em!).

~In high school, a freaking *guidance councelor* had sex with a teacher in the school library. The security cameras caught the whole thing. The teacher she did it with transferred to another school but she had the nerve to keep on working there and to this day still works there. And whenever students ask her about the incident she writes them up- she doesn't even try to deny that it happened.

~High school, assistant principal got arrested for drunk driving and crashing into a cop car. Need I say more?

~This is a friend's story, but apparently in like 4th grade, his crazy teacher had an imaginary class pet bird named Penelope. Some kid told the teacher he accidentally sat on Penelope and killed her. She began bawling about it. Seriously.


----------



## Love! (Jan 19, 2011)

our ap calculus teacher took maternity leave
so for the last half of that semester we had one who didn't quite know what she was doing
she seemed to have a decent enough grasp of the material but wasn't too great at teaching it
and whenever she'd make a mistake, she'd say 'just kidding!'



Adenosis Silo said:


> This kid walked up to me once and asked me the following:
> 
> _"What football team do you support?"_
> 
> ...


yes
that would have been an incredibly stupid thing to say
we also have something called the 'separation of church and state' here
and if you think most americans care more about god than sports
you've never met one


----------



## Adenosis Silo (Jan 19, 2011)

eversleep said:


> ...wait wut?



It makes me RAGE that such a trivial thing has become such an important part of their lives that they assume EVERYONE they meet is going to have a favorite football team.


----------



## eversleep (Jan 19, 2011)

Adenosis Silo said:


> It makes me RAGE that such a trivial thing has become such an important part of their lives that they assume EVERYONE they meet is going to have a favorite football team.


 That's not what I was "wut"ing about. I was referring to YOUR response.


----------



## WolfGuy100 (Jan 19, 2011)

eversleep said:


> ~This is a friend's story, but apparently in like 4th grade, his crazy teacher had an imaginary class pet bird named Penelope. Some kid told the teacher he accidentally sat on Penelope and killed her. She began bawling about it. Seriously.


 
I cried too...from laughing hard! 8D That's a funniest shit I have ever read. Seriously, I wish I have teachers who are like that.


----------



## Love! (Jan 20, 2011)

Adenosis Silo said:


> It makes me RAGE that such a trivial thing has become such an important part of their lives that they assume EVERYONE they meet is going to have a favorite football team.


looks like you'll just have to do the _christian_ thing and forgive them for not being as devout as you :v


----------



## Littlerock (Jan 20, 2011)

Adenosis Silo said:


> This kid walked up to me once and asked me the following:
> 
> _"What football team do you support?"_
> 
> ...


 Yeah, I find church more important than footy. You do realize though that American football fans are many times crazier with glee about their sport? In in America, if you were to ask anyone anything like "What church do you go to?" to someone you don't know very well, you'd be cast as a creep. Especially in a public _school_. In a Catholic school, yes, I attended one for 7+ years, it would be even dafter a question.

And seriously? He was just trying to make conversation by starting off with a generally popular topic.


----------



## Volkodav (Jan 20, 2011)

i remember two girls started fighting in the hall and the bust into our room and then theyre still fighting and the principal came in
and one of the girls punched her right in the face


thats all i remember though
oh and i bit my kindergarten teacher cause she didnt let me go see my mom in the hallway until it was time to go


----------



## Nokly (Jan 20, 2011)

There was a fight over a bottle of hot sauce at my school last week. It was so hot the one kid threw up, and then one kid got mad because the hot sauce got on his shirt and then they started throwing punches, one kid with the bottle in his hand. there was hot sauce flying everywhere and when a teacher came and broke it up the one kid shrugged him off and punched him in the face.


----------



## PvtPuma (Jan 21, 2011)

12th grade-This substitute teacher asked the English class if anyone knew what the word "craven" meant.  One of the kids responded, "Yeah, I know I'm craven some french fries right now."

11th grade-My friend was standing in the lunch line, and this group of kids cuts in front of him.  Their reasoning?  "They ain't be hungry like we do."

11th grade-We were talking about horses in my history class, and the resident genius (who later became valedictorian) laughs to herself and says "MOO!"

11th grade-This girl in band said she couldn't march because her throat hurt, but if we went inside and played she could play her instrument.  She also brought crutches and kept switching which foot was hurt throughout the 2 hour class.

10th grade-One of the girls in my chemistry class said that the body couldn't tell the difference between a sneeze and an orgasm, and the teacher responded by saying that she (the teacher) needed to sneeze more.  Needless to say, the class freaked out.

7th grade-One girl asked her friend what people from Germany were called, to which the other replied, "Germish?"

7th grade-My English teacher was talking to the class and said something along the lines of getting us more in tune with our "Pre-AP-ness."


----------



## Mr Meatballs (Jan 21, 2011)

this girl who was in my secondary school class was called jessica (why do the dumb ones always have that name?) and the frenh teacher asks the name of a famous street in parisand she says, "the effiel tower!"


----------



## Heliophobic (Jan 21, 2011)

Adenosis Silo said:


> not some bloke who kicks a ball into a goal post.


 
Pfft... the alphafaggot sport nuts are way worse in the U.S.... or at least in Ohio.



Love! said:


> looks like you'll just have to do the _christian_ thing and forgive them for not being as devout as you :v





Love! said:


> _christian_



/troll


----------



## williambrownpaws (Jan 22, 2011)

You may have heard of the Memphis City School District lately and their 90 pregnancies and even though the schools hand out protection, the majority of the kids dont even know what they are, even the highschoolers!


----------



## Super_Tron (Jan 22, 2011)

Nobody ever said anything outlandishly stupid at my school, they just sort of added droplets of idiocy to the pile of dumb that filled the halls there.


----------



## Monster. (Jan 22, 2011)

Here's a good one.

I popped by the University to make sure everything was paid and to get my schedule fixed up since a few of the classes were showing up as "TBC". As I was showing my ID to the person at the front desk, some slut shoves past me and demands to see a principal.

/facepalm


----------



## black tiger (Jan 22, 2011)

Kamau Husky said:


> A couple weeks ago while working in my auto class, the principal came over the intercom and
> said that the school was under a code red drill (school lockdown). One of the so called "scholar" mechanics
> screamed, "FIRE!", threw oil everywere and then ran out the door.
> 
> Yesterday in history class, my teacher asked what a black market was. The redneck of the class stood up and shouted Walmart.


 
Lol that mush of been interesting to see 
Shit would of said the same thing that Wal-Mart was the black market


----------



## Super_Tron (Jan 22, 2011)

Miss Haha said:


> Here's a good one.
> 
> I popped by the University to make sure everything was paid and to get my schedule fixed up since a few of the classes were showing up as "TBC". As I was showing my ID to the person at the front desk, some slut shoves past me and demands to see a principal.
> 
> /facepalm


What an abrasive person.  You should have told her that you were the principal.


----------



## Milo (Jan 22, 2011)

I had a staggering amount of pedophiles in my schools. most of which were janitors... one of which I used to talk to often...

in 2nd grade, I had a racist teacher who got fired for calling one of my friends "******"

in 6th grade, one kid in my class got caught jacking off lol

in 7th grade, I got held back :C (I'm one of the stupid people in school D'

I started 7th grade again... only this time, in a christian academy... it was awful

and so on... that's all the stuff I can remember so far.


----------



## Scotty1700 (Jan 22, 2011)

My Vice president (Whom we literally called Mr. Blastoise)  was apparently receiving a BJ from the new calculus teacher when a band geek walked in...


----------



## Tewin Follow (Jan 22, 2011)

williambrownpaws said:


> You may have heard of the Memphis City School District lately and their 90 pregnancies and even though the schools hand out protection, the majority of the kids dont even know what they are, even the highschoolers!


 
It's funny because they're ruining their own and their children's lives.


----------



## Mr Meatballs (Jan 22, 2011)

(also in secondry school year 8 LLW) this fat ginger asshole(just about everybody hated him except his weird chinese friend) just flat out grabbed a girls boob. in front of everyone. at the front of the class. Holy mother of god.


----------



## ComeAsYouAre (Jan 22, 2011)

My 8th grade teacher was a huge christians, so he told us how stupid he thought the theory of evolution was. He told us how scientists said that all living things on earth are somehow related and share a common ansester. He told us that that was like comparing people to earthworms. I raised my hand and said 'Well humans and earth worms both came from whatever the first living organism was.' I made a point the teacher couldn't argue with. X3

In English class last semester, my teacher was talking about how catholic priests were supposed to never have sex with anyone and I raised my hand and asked; 'except for maybe little boys'?
...fortunately she had a sense of humor.

In health class one time, the teacher mentioned the same thing and someone asked 'What if they get caught masturbating?'

Last year, the P.E. teacher was saying he had seen the movie 'The Wolfman' and I said; 'I'd like to show that blonde over there who the wolfman is'. When I think of that time I feel the sudden urge to hit myself.


----------



## Tewin Follow (Jan 22, 2011)

ComeAsYouAre said:


> Last year, the P.E. teacher was saying he had seen the movie 'The Wolfman' and I said; 'I'd like to show that blonde over there who the wolfman is'. *When I think of that time I feel the sudden urge to hit myself*.


 
Oh man, I hope you did.


----------



## Mr Meatballs (Jan 27, 2011)

we were in history.
The teacher was talkin about elizibeth the first
and the school "genius" jessica says,
"but miss who makes up these stories"
History is made up huh?


----------



## Commiecomrade (Jan 28, 2011)

"But I thought World War Two was first. That's why they invented planes afterwards."

WTF.


----------



## Tewin Follow (Jan 28, 2011)

Commiecomrade said:


> "But I thought World War Two was first. That's why they invented planes afterwards."
> 
> WTF.


 
I can't even...
Wow.


----------



## Commiecomrade (Jan 28, 2011)

Harebelle said:


> I can't even...
> Wow.



I actually got more pissed at this:

My physics teacher is just plain awesome. He'll play music from all over the spectrum, as long as it's something modern pop culture doesn't do.
He was playing Metallica, and some girl, who is usually very smart, asks him why he's playing screamo.
SCREAMO.
As in, the subgenre of emo which is a subgenre of hardcore punk.
Metallica is thrash metal, and it doesn't even have any screaming in it whatsoever. I get pretty pissed when people call black metal or melodic death metal screamo, but this is just unacceptable.
Double fail.


----------



## Cam (Jan 28, 2011)

Commiecomrade said:


> "But I thought World War Two was first. That's why they invented planes afterwards."
> 
> WTF.


 
Ive managed to hear worse. *Kid looks at books in library* "Why are there so many books on world war eleven?" ._.


----------



## Bloodshot_Eyes (Jan 29, 2011)

Commiecomrade said:


> I actually got more pissed at this:
> 
> My physics teacher is just plain awesome. He'll play music from all over the spectrum, as long as it's something modern pop culture doesn't do.
> He was playing Metallica, and some girl, who is usually very smart, asks him why he's playing screamo.
> ...


Buweofmwdeflhw;gw;d... oweihfvw.... I can't evenskdbvhue... WHAT!?


----------



## Leafblower29 (Jan 29, 2011)

Today people in class didn't know where Mount Rushmore is. One of them even thought it was in West Virginia.


----------



## MaverickCowboy (Jan 29, 2011)

A girl in class shared that cocaine should be legalized.


----------



## Mr Meatballs (Jan 29, 2011)

MaverickCowboy said:


> A girl in class shared that cocaine should be legalized.


 Just an FYI. you shoud probably check the condition of her nose.
If it looks dead and rotted she might be hiding a secret stash of coke.


----------



## Ikrit (Jan 29, 2011)

somebody would call a bomb threat and we would sit our asses in the cold waiting for the bomb squad to say it's all clear


----------



## Inashne117 (Jan 30, 2011)

Sometime in high school.
dumb hot girl in class - "I'M CONFUZZELED!!" trying to sound cute.
friend of mine - "No, you're just stupid!"

Senior year.
Wannabe MMA fighter who spent the year bragging about how tough he was - "You're just jealous."
Scrawny nerdy kid in class - "No, you're just mad because you cant answer the easiest riddle in the world."
Wannabe - "Oh yea? Whats that?"
Nerd - "What did the five fingers say to the face?" *Waits a full 5 seconds before delivering one helluva slap to his face* "SLAP!"
Teacher - "You just gonna take that?"
*Several seconds pass*
Another student - "Yea, he took that."


----------



## Ames (Jan 30, 2011)

"The tympanum is in your nose, right?"


----------



## Mr Meatballs (Jan 30, 2011)

Inashne117 said:


> Sometime in high school.
> dumb hot girl in class - "I'M CONFUZZELED!!" trying to sound cute.
> friend of mine - "No, you're just stupid!"
> 
> ...


I would have high fived the nerd and the friend of yours so hard.


----------



## Super_Tron (Jan 30, 2011)

High School.  A sunny Thursday afternoon.  History class is winding down, and some students are discussing zodiac signs.
<dude 1> Heh.  Cancer is the name of a disease.  Hey Girl 1, what's your zodiac?
<Girl 1> (offended) I'm not a zodiac!


----------



## Nineteen-TwentySeven (Jan 30, 2011)

Inashne117 said:


> Sometime in high school.
> dumb hot girl in class - "I'M CONFUZZELED!!" trying to sound cute.
> friend of mine - "No, you're just stupid!"
> 
> ...


 
I want to high-five that friend of yours.
Also that nerd. And that teacher.


----------



## Namalucibai (Jan 30, 2011)

^ Mordecai

I've been in my Earth Science class, and this one bimbo of a girl asked the teacher (a straight and true nerd, like I) what was the largest earthquake the world has ever had. The teacher, actually contemplating the question, replied with "That's impossible to tell, because the world was very chaotic in its early stages of existence. The girl responded with, "Oh, I thought it was Hurricane Katrina."

A different girl once didn't know what a word meant, got a dictionary, found the word, typed it on google, and looked it up. She used the dictionary for _spelling._

That same girl had no idea what a i d s was (When separated by letter), not connecting to it AIDS.


----------



## CAThulu (Jan 30, 2011)

Relevant

http://failbook.failblog.org/2011/01/30/funny-facebook-fails-posts-from-an-english-teacher/


----------



## Namalucibai (Jan 30, 2011)

The sad thing is, that teacher isn't the only one with student/parents like that.


----------



## Braux (Jan 31, 2011)

Commiecomrade said:


> I actually got more pissed at this:
> 
> My physics teacher is just plain awesome. He'll play music from all over the spectrum, as long as it's something modern pop culture doesn't do.
> He was playing Metallica, and some girl, who is usually very smart, asks him why he's playing screamo.
> ...


 
SonuvaBIT-

I had a Spanish history/grammar teacher that played us Van Halen  He always had extra-credit quizzes that related to shows and movies like Star Trek, Back to the Future, Doctor Who, and others. Every time he would get angry he would "yell" in Spanish, good times...

I heard this in History a week ago:

Girl 1: "Hey, Steven, what like, religion do the Islum people believe in? Oops, I mean Islams or something."
Steven: "Uh, I donno, like the Islums religion?"
Girl 1: "Whatever, I'll put that down..."

And no, I didnt spell "Islam" or "Islamic" *facepalm*


----------



## Itakirie (Jan 31, 2011)

I can't think of much, but in my Algebra class there are these two girls that once got into an argument over which shade of pink is better.

Girl 1: I SAY PALE PINK IS BETTER BECAUSE IT SUPPORTS BREAST CANCER! >:U
Girl 2: BUT HOT PINK IS BETTER CAUSE ITS BRIGHTER AND SEXY! >:V

And then back and forth with "NO" and "Nuh uh" and shit until the teacher lost it and screamed at them to "get the fuck out!" of the classroom.

I also remember 7th grade, I was the only kid in my entire class to know where New Zealand and Russia were on a geometry quiz. I was also the only kid to pass it.


----------



## Nekomimi (Jan 31, 2011)

I remember fifth grade...we were talking about Benjamin Franklin and one girl raises her hand;
"Is Benjamin Franklan still alive?"
-.-


----------



## Dr. Durr (Jan 31, 2011)

Pal: Infinity Ward made the best best first person shooter.
Me: No, Valve did.
He went apeshit, with hurtful words. He said Valve could suck a dick. I almost cried from that. HOW CAN YOU BE THAT STUPID!?


----------



## Fenrari (Jan 31, 2011)

*works for college housing with a night job*

WOW YOU WORK ALL NIGHT?

yes, I work a night job it's 11->7

THAT'S LIKE THE WHOLE NIGHT!

yes...

Still better than any number of conversations I've had with drunk people.


----------



## Digitalpotato (Feb 2, 2011)

Today I predict that Subway will be full. 

It's eight below zero outside...First instinct? LET'S GO TO SUBWAY!!!


----------



## The Anarchectomy (Feb 2, 2011)

Stupid people should stop wasting their parents or the governments money and get a factory job.


----------



## Leafblower29 (Feb 2, 2011)

In 8th grade science class, a girl asked "Is there air in wind?".


----------



## WolfGuy100 (Feb 2, 2011)

Another thing about stupid people at school...
9th grade: I was in freshman science class (I got HIGHEST grade ever in that class) and teacher were talking about chemical compound, one girl stupidly said, "Can we drink Drano?" (Drano, that liquid plumper to clear clogged sink. :V)


----------



## 8-bit (Feb 2, 2011)

WolfGuy100 said:


> Another thing about stupid people at school...
> 9th grade: I was in freshman science class (I got HIGHEST grade ever in that class) and teacher were talking about chemical compound, one girl stupidly said, "Can we drink Drano?" (Drano, that liquid plumper to clear clogged sink. :V)


 
Well, you technically CAN, but you'll die. :v


----------



## Nineteen-TwentySeven (Feb 2, 2011)

Leafblower29 said:


> In 8th grade science class, a girl asked "Is there air in wind?".


 
I have lost all faith in humanity.



WolfGuy100 said:


> one girl stupidly said, "Can we drink Drano?" (Drano, that liquid plumper to clear clogged sink. :V)


 
Sounds like a great idea for her...


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## Nokly (Feb 13, 2011)

My friend wasn't feeling well so he took some Advil during school, then proceded to wash it down with orange juice. He saw that you get 100% of your vitamin C and asked if it was bad to mix Vitamin C and Advil. I said to him "Oh my god! You took Advil and Vitamin C!?! Dude that creates an acid in your stomach that can eat aaway at your organs!" He got so freaked out, and I couldn't stop laughing.


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## Beta Link (Feb 13, 2011)

There was one really good line someone said in 9th grade math... which I vaguely recall involving geography, for some reason... but I can't bloody remember it now. Ah well.

One I _can_ remember though: I was in a study hall in 9th grade, and since it was the end of the year, I had no homework, and didn't really feel like studying. So since I could, I pulled out my laptop and started watching some Doctor Who. Someone walked over and asked me what I was watching, so I told her it was a British sci-fi TV series.
Her response was "Oh, it's British? How do you know what they're saying, then?"

I tried my best to explain to her calmly that they speak English in Great Britain, but once I was sure she wasn't looking, I did an IRL facepalm.


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## Trance (Feb 13, 2011)

I made $24 dollars on a bet that a millisecond is a thousandth of a second, not a hundredth of a second at my school last year.  And that was against six people.  
wtf, public education?


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## Blutide (Feb 13, 2011)

Jared said:


> He can't have been serious.


 

Welcome to earth we have maybe 30 years left, join us. :|

âŒ_âŒ


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## Enwon (Feb 13, 2011)

I was debating with someone in my English class about politics.  This person was a highly conservative Tea-Partier, and has already made statements such as:
"Someone should go to DC with a gun and kill Obama."

Now, over the years, I've learned how to deal with Tea Partiers.  The trick is to make them think that you are a politically independent moderate who hates both parties and supports smaller government.  And avoid moral issues, such as abortion and gay marriage.  Unfortunately, the conversation was headed that way.  Let me show you the abortion of logic that had occured:

Him: "You know, gays shouldn't be allowed to marry.  They are sick abominations of nature and marriage is a sacred institution between a man and a woman" (he registers visible disgust on his face as he says this)
Me: "Wait, I thought you supported personal freedom?"
Him: "Sure, but homosexuality is just wrong.  We have to value American values."

I got bored of this so I ended up changing the topic with a joke about abortion.


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## Sarcastic Coffeecup (Feb 13, 2011)

there is a guy at our school who is always like:
(Me)- would it be fun if someone slipped during trying to drift in that turn?
(He)- and then the car would explode and destroy our school like a nuke!
(We) *Facepalm* at him


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## Joeyyy (Feb 13, 2011)

Last week someone asked, dead seriously, if the reason why the ocean is salty is because of wale sperm.


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