# MakMak tries to ask for advice without looking stupid :3



## makmakmob (Sep 26, 2009)

Okay, there's this story I'm desperate to write I have going, and before someone says 'just write it then', I have to say, there is an issue I feel with the way the story is presented.
Well, it's about a war. A very big war, in the future, and there are characters who are either fighting in this war, or trying to do other stuff when it happens. The thing that worries me is, I liked the idea of focusing this story of what it must be like to witness this war, as opposed to making a big deal about looking at the war itself; the literary equivalent of shooting from the soldier's level, basically, instead of going on about a whole battle as though watching it from a helicopter.
The thing that troubles me here, is that it means a lot of the inspiration for this story comes from personal stories, and I'm sort of worried about making this story look stupid by marginalising the war and the goings on that don't directly effect characters, despite the fact that they are very severe.
Any advice? Should I scrap this, should I keep going with the the big focus on individual tragedies or let it slide a bit?


----------



## nybx4life (Sep 26, 2009)

makmakmob said:


> The thing that troubles me here, is that it means a lot of the inspiration for this story comes from personal stories, and I'm sort of worried about making this story look stupid by marginalising the war and the goings on that don't directly effect characters, despite the fact that they are very severe.
> Any advice? Should I scrap this, should I keep going with the the big focus on individual tragedies or let it slide a bit?



Okay, well this seems like a issue directly with POV.
Well then, have you ever read the book "Maus"?

If not, then hear me out. For the story, how much does the war affect your characters?
Is their way of life drastically changed from before? Does this affect any relationship between characters?
If not, you can push that off to the side. If it does, it is good to drop in a bit on info about the war every once in a while, or describe a bit of effects on the environment, or the characters themselves.

If the character is a soldier, this might be different, because their view on the war is more focused on that.


----------



## ShÃ nwÃ ng (Sep 26, 2009)

makmakmob said:


> Any advice? Should I scrap this, should I keep going with the the big focus on individual tragedies or let it slide a bit?



You'll need to weigh the number of characters with exactly the kind of direction you're planning on taking this "war" in. I'll tell you right now, if you have too many characters you'll find yourself overwhelmed to keep up with all that's going on with them if you're putting together a chronological piece in which every character plays a role in the war. Note that in that instance your subject would be the war and not the characters whom your trying to get us to empathize with.

Personally, if you're really aiming to demonstrate the impact of the 'war' then you should focus on the individual tragedies aspect and worry less about the logistics of the great war. By humanizing the abstract concept of war through subjective interpretation you'll be better able to communicate the impact you're looking for because it brings it from the objective level to the subjective perspective thereby avoiding the 'fear' you've noted in putting this story together.


----------



## Kindar (Sep 27, 2009)

my advise is that you should siomply write it and not worry about it marginalizing anything or looking stupid.

write the first draft as you intend it. once it's finish decide if changes need to be made and what those are. 

as help maybe you can ask some people who lived through a war to tell you their stories so you get a feel for what it could sound like


----------



## jagdwolf (Sep 27, 2009)

I would write it.  I have studied war history, but to understand it fully, I went to VFW halls and functions and just listened.  I would ask if they would mind telling me their stories, not for the gore content, but for the way that most people drift off in telling their story from the main point.

I am not writing one, I just want to understand better what people go through.  sounds promising and I would love to read it as you go.


----------



## Volpino (Sep 27, 2009)

There are lots of literary examples of what you're talking about. Truth be told, it's what separates fiction and biography from say a text on history. Bringing large, earth shaking events onto the personal level is what a writer does.

The books that stay with you are the ones that hit on a truth solidly and demonstrate how it's able to change things around a person you can really care about.

A good example of this is shown in the book, (and miniseries) Band of Brothers.  A line or two at most is what tells you that a major Allied field hospital and medical supply depot had been over-run by the Germans during the Battle of the Bulge. This is historical fact, but what makes us _feel _that is when the medic is going around constantly trying to get bandages from soldiers that don't need them, so he can use them on those that do. His desperation is what gives added meaning to a refuge's selfless donation of a head scarf to use as a bandage.

It had added meaning to me, because I was told that when you do first aid on a soldier, you use their bandage, never yours, at least, never give yours up lightly. You don't know when you'll need it.

Write your story. Making sure that emphasis is correctly placed in the story is something that any experienced editor can help you with. You can always weed out things that bring unwanted emphasis to the forefront.


----------



## Torrijos-sama (Sep 29, 2009)

Gonzo Journalism man....

Read up on Hunter S. Thompson.


----------



## Lazarus (Sep 30, 2009)

jesusfish2007 said:


> Gonzo Journalism man....
> 
> Read up on Hunter S. Thompson.



I second that. You can have the war take a backseat and make the main character's and their actions the focus of the story. Going Gonzo may be a good idea.


----------



## Atrak (Sep 30, 2009)

Okay, I skimmed through the replies, and I don't think anyone touched on this idea:
Write the story like you want: focused on your main character. Everynow and then, however, have like a little excerpt, a piece of story that doesn't include your protaginist, and give the needed info there. Here's a quick example that I thought of as I wrote it just now  :

Roe stopped limping and turned back to the battlefield. The pure carnage of it made him sick, and he tried to throw up when he thought about his role in that battle. Tried, but failed, as he had already regurgitated everything in his stomach hours ago. He stared sadly, but his thoughts were clouded by pure exhaustion, so he turned around and continued to walk away. Away from this field...away from this war.

                                               ***
Stella stared down at the young soldier, her feline tail twitching as her claws dug into the bark of the tree. Her fangs bared as she watched him walk away, wanting to sink them into his flesh, to taste his blood on her tongue...
She shook her head to clear the image before it took hold. She glared disdainfully at the human, the only thing keeping her in place was the warning from her master. If she so much as breathed on him yet, before they were ready, her master would...
She wimpered at the thought of what he would do. She gazed at the young human once more before turning and loping away through the trees.

                                       ***

Ro felt the hair on his neck stand up, and turned towards the forest. He stared hard, looking for any sign of motion, but say nothing. After a few minutes, he shrugged and continued on his way to the stream that he remembered marching by the day before. After that, well, he was going to find *them*.


----------

