# Gamer Valentines



## Dragoneer (Oct 15, 2006)

Earlier, I had a stupid idea (one of many, I assure you). What would it be like if gamers wrote those shitty little Valentines cards and pre-stale candies mass-distributed by peddlers of artificial love?

*Incredibly corny "Gamer love" catchphrases follow. I can not be held legally liable for any groans, sighs and/or loss of respect for me that you may have after reading these.*
You made a speedrun straight to my heart.
A lover is you.
SENSUALITY. Baraka wins.
You're the final piece that completes my unique set.
Everytime I'm near you I want to insert .25 cents to continue.
Your love is like an expansion pack for my heart.
You're a power-up for my emotions.
UR LOVE WTFPWNS MY <3


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## Suule (Oct 15, 2006)

Every time you're near me, I get 1UP


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## thelonelydragon (Oct 15, 2006)

All your love are belong to me


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## Kiniel (Oct 15, 2006)

<<Love.>><<Do you need it?>>


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## DavidN (Oct 15, 2006)

A classic:

Roses are red
Violets are blue
All my base
Are belong to you.


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## blackdragoon (Oct 15, 2006)

the memory of our love is saved on the card of my heart.

(also 'neer you have a typo in your bold face text)


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## Kiniel (Oct 15, 2006)

DavidN said:
			
		

> A classic:
> 
> Roses are red
> Violets are blue
> ...



Of course, the hardcore version of that one is (from, I believe, a thinkgeek t-shirt)...

Roses are #FF0000
Violets are #0000FF
All my base
Are belong to you


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## DavidN (Oct 15, 2006)

=D

It's not actually valentine related, but similarly, "Daz makes your whites #GGGGGG" made me laugh for hours.


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## SFox (Oct 15, 2006)

When I first saw you, I earned enough EXP to gain 10 levels.


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## Silverdragon00 (Oct 15, 2006)

May our love never become corrupted


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## Rouge2 (Oct 15, 2006)

You're the Mushroom that makes me Super.
You're the Star that makes me Invincible.
You're my Peach to my Mario.
You're my Piranha Plant to my Pipe.


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## nrr (Oct 16, 2006)

Rouge2 said:
			
		

> drek drek drek drek


LAME!


```
(let
    ((roses (color 'red))
     (violets (color 'blue)))
  (belong :what 'my-base :to-whom 'you))
```


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## ArrowTibbs (Oct 17, 2006)

You're the FATALITY to my heart.
You're my ANIMALITY under the covers. 

;P Corny Mortal Kombat, woo!


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## Rouge2 (Oct 17, 2006)

nrr said:
			
		

> Rouge2 said:
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You have some balls to make fun of me.

Those lines are gold.  Play Super Mario Bros. some time and you'll understand, jerk.


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## Ruiner (Oct 17, 2006)

> You have some balls to make fun of me.



/me explodes


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## Litre (Oct 17, 2006)

Rouge2 said:
			
		

> nrr said:
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Doesn't take much to :*


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## Suule (Oct 17, 2006)

It's time to make love to you and chew bubblegum. And I'm all out of gum.


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## Pinkuh (Oct 17, 2006)

http://www.bungie.net/SlideShow.aspx?path=/games/Halo&slideshow=PrintArt&slide=12
http://www.bungie.net/SlideShow.aspx?path=/games/Halo&slideshow=PrintArt&slide=13
http://www.bungie.net/SlideShow.aspx?path=/games/Halo&slideshow=PrintArt&slide=14
http://www.bungie.net/SlideShow.aspx?path=/games/Halo&slideshow=PrintArt&slide=11


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## Rouge2 (Oct 17, 2006)

Just say no to double posts!


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## Dragoneer (Oct 17, 2006)

Rouge2 said:
			
		

> You're the Mushroom that makes me Super...


Posting the same exact thing twice does not, contrary to popular believe, make it twice as good. Please refrain from reposting the same exact thing in same thread. Flooding is not your friend.


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## uncia2000 (Oct 17, 2006)

Dragoneer said:
			
		

> Please refrain from reposting the same exact thing in same thread.



... *or* in a different thread...


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## Dragoneer (Oct 17, 2006)

uncia2000 said:
			
		

> Dragoneer said:
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Your love powers my BFG9000, Uncia.


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## blackdragoon (Oct 17, 2006)

my love for you has infinite ammo.


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## Rouge2 (Oct 17, 2006)

blackdragoon said:
			
		

> my love for you has infinite ammo.



SUPER LAME

You are the Final Boss in my heart.


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## WelcomeTheCollapse (Oct 17, 2006)

You attract me like a Gravity Gun...
You make my heart hum like a Kart...

/Boooo me.
//Hooray beer!


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## thelonelydragon (Oct 17, 2006)

The world is worth saving from an evil silver hair madman because of you.


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## Bokracroc (Oct 18, 2006)

Suule said:
			
		

> It's time to make love to you and chew bubblegum. And I'm all out of gum.


*[size=xx-large]STOP THE INTERNET![/size] *
GIVE THIS PERSON A FUCKING HUGE MEDAL!


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## Hyenaworks (Oct 18, 2006)

Special World of Warcraft Valentines


/love
Is there a queue for the battleground of your heart?
Can I be your epic mount?
[2. Trade] WTB your love
[2. Trade] WTS my heart
*screenshot of corpses shaped in a heart*

Okay, enough lameness.


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## Evol (Oct 18, 2006)

Suule said:
			
		

> Every time you're near me, I get 1UP



Oh dear god.  This is the clear winner. <3


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## Suule (Oct 18, 2006)

Bokracroc said:
			
		

> Suule said:
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				Evol said:
			
		

> Suule said:
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_DOUBLEKILL!_


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## Icarus (Oct 18, 2006)

You have the cheat code to my heart...and you used it.

=D


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## ArrowTibbs (Oct 18, 2006)

You're the headshot of my dreams.

You just sniped my heart.

You zergling rush my heart, kekekekeke!

You make me want to spawn more overlords with you.


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## Icarus (Oct 18, 2006)

lol starcraft!!1


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## Dragoneer (Oct 18, 2006)

You opened a slipgate to my soul.

Let's take our relationship to the bonus stage.

I want to get ahold of your expansion pack.


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## Rouge2 (Oct 18, 2006)

Your infantry captured my heart.

Before you say it's not Gamer related, play Advance Wars.


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## Kiniel (Oct 19, 2006)

Here's one for the ladies...

"Your princess is in _this_ castle."

Yes, lame, but it's classic Mario!


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## Hanazawa (Oct 19, 2006)

You make me wanna level you up, equip you with all the best things, and forge our future together - until you get murdered in the face.


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## diarmaidhuthence (Oct 19, 2006)

Truly, you are the master of unlocking.
I'd go so far as to switch off without saving right now for you.
You give me more good feelings than a vibrating Dual-Shock. 
(Euuuw, I retract that last one)


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## Kiniel (Oct 19, 2006)

Here's the ultimate compliment...

"When I'm with you, I feel so happy that even the Nintendo Wii doesn't seem so horrible."

(Hey, it'd be a big compliment from _me_.  If I ever find someone who makes that statement true, they are never leaving my side )


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## Darko (Oct 19, 2006)

diarmaidhuthence said:
			
		

> Truly, you are the master of unlocking.


*EPIC WIN*
And of course, my horrible one:
A WINNAR OF MY HEART IS YUO


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## Kiniel (Oct 19, 2006)

"The wizard needs _love_, badly!"

(Ah... Gauntlet)


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## blackdragoon (Oct 20, 2006)

with my mighty "sword" of fury i battle onward. that i might finally "penetrate" the defenses of the "chasm" of your heart.

i'm sorry i couldn't resist.


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## Smart_Cookie (Oct 20, 2006)

[Ugh, and and you simply COULDN'T resist bringing the console wars into this... =/ This thread is no place to bash systems. It's about love~ Or at least the commercialized version of it.]


Your Love is like the Raid on the main villain's  Fortress. I might have to fight a lot of guys, find some keycards, sit through hours of dialogue and dress up like a girl to get inside, but it's worth it.

Hmm... That'd be better if I could say it shorter....


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## diarmaidhuthence (Oct 20, 2006)

You turn my God code on.
And a dirty-ish one that's slightly off-tone but I couldn't resist doing:
If my penis could have a cheat, it would be infinite continues. Or Big Head mode.


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## Evol (Oct 20, 2006)

_This_ is what it should have been.



			
				blackdragoon said:
			
		

> with my mighty "sword" of fury i battle onward. that i might finally "penetrate" the defenses of your "chasm".


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## ArrowTibbs (Oct 20, 2006)

Warning; dirty!

You make me touch my Wii analog stick.


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## Rouge2 (Oct 20, 2006)

diarmaidhuthence said:
			
		

> Truly, you are the master of unlocking.



Resident Evil, I heard that line in the game.


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## Sylvine (Oct 20, 2006)

"Thoughts about You made me forget Patch 1.10" <-- For D2-players only =)

~Sylv


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## blackdragoon (Oct 20, 2006)

Evol said:
			
		

> _This_ is what it should have been.
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i was trying to keep it pg13 at the time.


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## furry (Oct 21, 2006)

When I get close to you, I can feel my heart beating up up down down left right left right B A


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## Jotun (Oct 21, 2006)

thelonelydragon said:
			
		

> All your love are belong to me



"All my love are belong to you" makes more sense, for a Valentine Card or something.


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## Evol (Oct 21, 2006)

That's very much still PG-13.  There's this thing.  It's called _innuendo_.



			
				blackdragoon said:
			
		

> Evol said:
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## blackdragoon (Oct 21, 2006)

i like my version better. it has a bit more flair to it. your opinion is noted and disregarded.


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## facek (Oct 21, 2006)

This valentine isn't big enough for my love, yes, we require bigger.

I want to roll you up in my katamari.

You ninja looted my heart.

"My Love"~Forever Remix~: AAA

You Defeated My Heart.... Round Two

HK: My Love   +758 Honor


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## Kiniel (Oct 21, 2006)

furry said:
			
		

> When I get close to you, I can feel my heart beating up up down down left right left right B A



Excellent!  I can't believe that never even crossed my mind....


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## nrr (Oct 22, 2006)

When you're near, my gauntlet whirs for you.  "HUMILIATION," it cries out in a drawn-out muffled scream as it affectionately mutilates your flesh.  "HUMILIATION!"

When you're far, my railgun pines for you.  "IMPRESSIVE," it chimes as its slugs meet you like a blown kiss accelerating near the speed of light.  "IMPRESSIVE!"


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## blackdragoon (Oct 23, 2006)

the sight of your beauty powers up my sword.

you tried to steal my heart away, and you succeeded with a flawless victory.


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## MarieChan (Oct 23, 2006)

I had a this inuendo, is that close enough? x3

Care to rub my joystick?


It could work as some corny pickup line D=

Well, I also thought of some card that could have a DS in it, it would say "You have touched my heart" or something like that :3


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## nrr (Oct 23, 2006)

MarieChan said:
			
		

> Well, I also thought of some card that could have a DS in it, it would say "You have touched my heart" or something like that :3


"I love it when you touch me down there."


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## ArrowTibbs (Oct 23, 2006)

You make me want to use "Holy Lance."

(Tales of Symphonia)


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## diarmaidhuthence (Oct 23, 2006)

Being with you activates my Rumble Pak.
You make the PAL PS3 delay fly by.
I'd hold your hand and let you lead me anywhere. (That one probably works best from a woman to her beau, if they've both played Ico)


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## MarieChan (Oct 23, 2006)

You make my snake solid~!


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## DavidN (Oct 23, 2006)

*covers eyes* That's the worst (and possibly best) one so far.


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## Alchera (Oct 23, 2006)

You spoogy bitch! *heart*  (Derived from, "You spoony bard!" )

I love your dual shocks.

Your gaming habits give me an optical orgasm.


Yes, I know...I'm always such a bastard with these.


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## MarieChan (Oct 23, 2006)

DavidN said:
			
		

> *covers eyes* That's the worst (and possibly best) one so far.



Ah, thanks~ That makes me feel a little more welcome to this place!



Hmmm, I wonder if I can think of more...


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