# Wearing A collar when living with parents



## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

I'm 15, almost 16, and live with my parents, and i want to get a collar. I don't think my parents would agree with me though and they know about everything that i buy. I can't get away with saying it is for a cat or a dog either because we don't have any pets exept some  fish and a hamster. My younger brother also lives with us, hes 11, almost 12.

I was wondering if anybody knows how i can get a collar without my parents realising what or who it is for, and telling them is not really an option as they already critisize me for having a fake fox tail, and have put me off getting anything else like them which i want so bad.

If nobody has a solution i will have to wait until i move out after 6th form (i live in england btw, and can't get to any cons until i'm 17 or move out)

****RESOLVED!!!****

I will not be getting a collar until i have grown up more and have moved out, if i still want one then

****RESOLVED!!!****


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## RayO_ElGatubelo (Mar 20, 2011)

I've been trying to find a way to get a collar for years!

I know exactly the kind I want. This one.


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## LizardKing (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> they know about everything that i buy



Explain. Do they follow you to the shops or what?


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## net-cat (Mar 20, 2011)

Presumably you have a little bit of cash, right? Wait until next time you're out with friends and drop by a pet store.

That said... why? If you think you're parents won't agree and you'd get in trouble for having it, why risk it?


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## Volkodav (Mar 20, 2011)

Lmfao I love how you grouped your younger bro in with your pets

& idk, back when I was 15-16 I bought/wore collars and my dad never cared.


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## Rilvor (Mar 20, 2011)

My advice to you is to be honest. Don't attempt to dance around your parents with lies, they aren't going to fall for it. What it will do is make them increasingly suspicious of both you and the Furry Fandom, and rightfully so. If they say no, then respect their wishes. You don't _need_ something like this to be a supporter of this subculture. It's easily something you can wait for, if it's actually worth it to you.

More than likely they will say no. While it may seem ignorant, they are likely just trying to protect you. By the large, wearing a collar does not say "I'm a furry". It's still understood to mean a sexual aspect and probably something they want to protect their still very young child from.


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## dinosaurdammit (Mar 20, 2011)

Wait till you move out- parents can't bitch if you are not under your roof. Plus why would you get something you KNOW they are going to disagree with. Don't make it hard on yourself.

Personal opinion- wearing collars is stupid. You draw unneeded attention to yourself. Most people consider it a sexual thing so you will be criticized for it. Best just wear it at home or around close friends.


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## Volkodav (Mar 20, 2011)

........
Collar =/= furry
I wore mine cause I liked it.


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## Willow (Mar 20, 2011)

Not sure if I should laugh or be serious. 

I used to wear a cat collar and it never really was a problem. Then again, I was also like 9 or 10.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> Explain. Do they follow you to the shops or what?



They always make me show them what i bought when i get back, they even make me show them which libary books i borrowed


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## Tycho (Mar 20, 2011)

Are you fucking serious

I think you'll live without having a fucking collar until you're old enough to not make your parents weep bitterly over your poor fashion sense and your inane flights of furry fantasy.  Deal with it.  They're probably trying to do you a favor.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

dinosaurdammit said:


> Wait till you move out- parents can't bitch if you are not under your roof. Plus why would you get something you KNOW they are going to disagree with. Don't make it hard on yourself.
> 
> Personal opinion- wearing collars is stupid. You draw unneeded attention to yourself. Most people consider it a sexual thing so you will be criticized for it. Best just wear it at home or around close friends.


 
Good idea, Dinosaurdammit, i don't think it will make much diffrence though as long as i don't wear it to school or out of the village, as we are a small area



Tycho said:


> Are you fucking serious
> 
> I think you'll live without having a fucking collar until you're old enough to not make your parents weep bitterly over your poor fashion sense and your inane flights of furry fantasy.  Deal with it.  They're probably trying to do you a favor.


 
I guess your right, but i like to think that i can wear what i want as long as it does not offend others, that's why i havn't worn my tail out of my street yet...



RayO_ElGatubelo said:


> I've been trying to find a way to get a collar for years!
> 
> I know exactly the kind I want. This one.


 
I'd prefer a fabric one myself



Willow said:


> Not sure if I should laugh or be serious.
> 
> I used to wear a cat collar and it never really was a problem. Then again, I was also like 9 or 10.


 
Yeah, by the way, i do'nt mind if you laugh, it is kinda crazy anyway


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## LizardKing (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> I guess your right, but i like to think that i can wear what i want as long as it does not offend others, that's why i havn't worn my tail out of my street yet...


 
Wait wait wait

You have a tail, yet somehow getting a collar is a problem?


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## Paul'o'fox (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> Yeah, by the way, i do'nt mind if you laugh, it is kinda crazy anyway


 Can you please use the edit button?
Also I'm sure your parents wouldn't mind, you should ask them about it.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

net-cat said:


> Presumably you have a little bit of cash, right? Wait until next time you're out with friends and drop by a pet store.
> 
> That said... why? If you think you're parents won't agree and you'd get in trouble for having it, why risk it?


 
I don't think i will get in trouble like i will be banned from my laptop kinda thing, more like they would try their 
best to convince me to not to wear it, which would annoy us all a lot.

Anyway, i will see what they have in the pet shops, i will have to wait til i go colchester though as i don't think there
are any decent collars in the pet shop we have in the village.


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## dinosaurdammit (Mar 20, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> Wait wait wait
> 
> You have a tail, yet somehow getting a collar is a problem?


 
I see a tail as less of a problem compared to the collar- Tails can be seen as a halloween accessory worn outside the season and can be view as pretty harmless. Collars for the most part people jump to think of BDSM or something along those lines. People don't think collar=furry, they think collar=sexual kink.


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## Alstor (Mar 20, 2011)

Like what some of the people here have said, it might be best to wait it out. Parents will always find out about secrets if you're trying really hard to keep them. That is, of course, if you feel comfortable talking to your parents about the furry fandom.


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## Thatch (Mar 20, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> Wait wait wait
> 
> You have a tail, yet somehow getting a collar is a problem?


 
They'd probably think it's for BDSM.


I wouldn't blame them.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

LizardKing said:


> Wait wait wait
> 
> You have a tail, yet somehow getting a collar is a problem?


 
Yeah, i said to my parents when i got it "I just wanted one, like cameron wants match attacks" and they managed to accept it altough they always laugh at me and say that i look like a fool. They also believe that wearing a collar is related to goth which is not what i am wearing it for.



dinosaurdammit said:


> I see a tail as less of a problem compared to the collar- Tails can be seen as a halloween accessory worn outside the season and can be view as pretty harmless. Collars for the most part people jump to think of BDSM or something along those lines. People don't think collar=furry, they think collar=sexual kink.



Exactly, nicely put.



Paul'o'fox said:


> Can you please use the edit button?
> Also I'm sure your parents wouldn't mind, you should ask them about it.



I would do, but i'm not entirely sure how to.



Clayton said:


> ........
> Collar =/= furry
> I wore mine cause I liked it.



Sames, i would wear it because i like it. not because i'm into thing such as goth. 



Thatch said:


> They'd probably think it's for BDSM.
> 
> 
> I wouldn't blame them.



that's if they know what BDSM is...




Alstor said:


> Like what some of the people here have said, it might be best to wait it out. Parents will always find out about secrets if you're trying really hard to keep them. That is, of course, if you feel comfortable talking to your parents about the furry fandom.


 
Yeah, the more i think about it, the less comfortable i am about talking about it to them. Anyway, my views might change in the next year or so


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## Oovie (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> that's if they know what BDSM is...


 Oh yeah, they probably do.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

Oovie said:


> Oh yeah, they probably do.



I don't really know, and i don't really fancy asking them :/


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## Term_the_Schmuck (Mar 20, 2011)

The only collar you should be wearing.


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## Oovie (Mar 20, 2011)

Term_the_Schmuck said:


> The only collar you should be wearing.


 Ties on women are yummy. Tie > collar


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## Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs (Mar 20, 2011)

You don't need a collar. Plus, people will probably think you're into BDSM, since furry is still, even with its increased publicity and numbers, relatively unknown.


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## Thatch (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> altough they always laugh at me and say that i look like a fool.



You're surprised? Tails might be harmless, but they do look fucking ridiculous.



xxLoisKentxx said:


> that's if they know what BDSM is...


 
Might not know the phrase, but I'm pretty sure every adult is familiar with the concept. Who knows, maybe they have a fancy for it behind closed doors :V



Ieatcrackersandjumpcliffs said:


> You don't need a collar. Plus, people will probably think you're into BDSM, since furry is still, even with its increased publicity and numbers, relatively unknown.


 
Or goth, as OP said her parents seem to think.


That said, you're still a kid, OP. If you're afraid to do some thing "because parents", then maybe you shouldn't. Really.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

Thatch said:


> You're surprised? Tails might be harmless, but they do look fucking ridiculous.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 

I think i will wait until i move out and can do it in private, and if my views change by then, then so be it.

Thanks to everyone who has helped my with this decision.


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## Willow (Mar 20, 2011)

Oovie said:


> Ties on women are yummy. Tie > collar


 I've always wanted to wear a tie.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

Willow said:


> I've always wanted to wear a tie.


 

I personally have never worn a tie, but that might change next year depending on how the 6th form dress code changes...


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## Xenke (Mar 20, 2011)

Willow said:


> I've always wanted to wear a tie.


 
Willow, it's harder to be jailbait in a tie. :/


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

Xenke said:


> Willow, it's harder to be jailbait in a tie. :/


 
ahhaha!


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## Thatch (Mar 20, 2011)

Xenke said:


> Willow, it's harder to be jailbait in a tie. :/


 
I don't know, all the old people seem to think that little boys in ties look cute :V


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## Schwimmwagen (Mar 20, 2011)

Wouldn't it work to just say it's a fashion thing?


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## dinosaurdammit (Mar 20, 2011)

Gibby said:


> Wouldn't it work to just say it's a fashion thing?


 
For some yea- then there are the parents that jump to goth and BDSM. Then that jumps to satan worship for what ever reason.


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## Vaelarsa (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> I don't think i will get in trouble like i will be banned from my laptop kinda thing, more like they would try their
> best to convince me to not to wear it, which would annoy us all a lot.


 Wait...
_*THIS*_ is the issue?

You do know that other people, on the street, will criticize the fuck out of you for it, and make their passing comments, too?

If your main issue is "wanting to avoid negative opinions," then you're better off not getting a collar, ever.


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## Icky (Mar 20, 2011)

Buy a collar, say it's for your hamster. 

Problem solved.


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## dinosaurdammit (Mar 20, 2011)

Icky said:


> Buy a collar, say it's for your *brother*.
> 
> Problem solved.


 
Dang you are right- got to keep little siblings in line! I suggest a corrective collar.


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## Xenke (Mar 20, 2011)

Icky said:


> Buy a collar, say it's for your hamster.
> 
> Problem solved.


 
Hey, if they can wear party hats, they can wear collars.


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## Jw (Mar 20, 2011)

If you get a collar, make sure you wear it tight enough.

Tunnel vision is a good thing.


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## Schwimmwagen (Mar 20, 2011)

dinosaurdammit said:


> Then that jumps to satan worship for what ever reason.


 
I have actually studied satan worship... It's not evil in the slightest. ._.


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## Willow (Mar 20, 2011)

Xenke said:


> Willow, it's harder to be jailbait in a tie. :/


 Is it now?


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## Xenke (Mar 20, 2011)

Willow said:


> Is it now?


 
It gives the illusion of being ALL GROWN UP.

Stick with a sailor suit.


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## VoidBat (Mar 20, 2011)

If you're afraid of reprimands, odd looks or rude comments from the individuals in your social circle then it's probably a good idea to drop the collar obsession and wear a mundane pendent instead.


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## dinosaurdammit (Mar 20, 2011)

Gibby said:


> I have actually studied satan worship... It's not evil in the slightest. ._.


 
Satan worship from what I gather is not "devil" worship- rather worship and doing what you want without inhibitions. The "Satanic bible" is pretty logical in some of its stuff. Dog collars are; however, not mentioned :3C


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 20, 2011)

I suppose i could say it was for coco,but i think i'll just wait
anyway, i'll never susceed on getting the collar on Cameron anyway



jwmcd2 said:


> If you get a collar, make sure you wear it tight enough.
> 
> Tunnel vision is a good thing.



Is it now?


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## Thatch (Mar 20, 2011)

dinosaurdammit said:


> Dang you are right- got to keep little siblings in line! I suggest a corrective collar.


 
I'd suggest muzzles, too.


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## Jw (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> Is it now?


 
Rest assured it is a good idea for anyone that wants to wear a pet collar. If you want to prove me wrong, then be my guest.


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## Willow (Mar 20, 2011)

Xenke said:


> It gives the illusion of being ALL GROWN UP.
> 
> Stick with a sailor suit.


Or a maid outfit. Though...I'm not really a fan of dresses. 

So sailor suit it is! ^^


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## Schwimmwagen (Mar 20, 2011)

dinosaurdammit said:


> Satan worship from what I gather is not "devil" worship- rather worship and doing what you want without inhibitions. The "Satanic bible" is pretty logical in some of its stuff. Dog collars are; however, not mentioned :3C


 
Yeah, it's still the enemy of the christians, though. Really, "god" has been marked as evil by the satanists due to his tyrannic rule by taking away the things in life that we enjoy so much as humans and those things are called "sins" which are mostly our human needs and christian fanatics inflict pain and torture on those who fail to comply. It's as if satanism is for those who want to enjoy life and their personal freedom and having to bow to no-one whilst christianity sets out to take it away and bow down before a being that has no true proof of existence and model all our lives on one person who died for our "sins." But this is not a religion thread, so I will shut up. :v


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## SilverKarja (Mar 20, 2011)

If you're so worried, skip on an actual collar and just get a nice choker or 3 of some kind that will give you about the same feel instead.


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## Deo (Mar 20, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> which i want so bad.


 Why do you want a collar so much? I am puzzled.


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## Conker (Mar 20, 2011)

Few things you can do if you really want one.

Next time you're out at like a Target or Walmart with your parents, go buy one. Seriously "I'll be looking at the video games" then go into the pet section, grab, purchase, stuff in pockets. Collars are small, they will fit in your pocket.

If you go with friends and swing by a petstore, buy one, stuff in pocket. You said your parents question you on things you buy? Well just lie and tell htem you didn't buy anything.

Third, most gas stations and Walgreens are selling prepaid Visa cards. These are prepaid credit cards. Easy to use. Grab one and buy the collar off of the Internet. As long as you can intercept the package, no one needs to know.

I have two collars, I've worn them a few times. I've never gotten any negative comments from passing strangers or anything like that, but you will be looked at. I've stopped wearing them. YMMV (your mileage may vary)


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## Heliophobic (Mar 20, 2011)

Believe me when I say that wearing a collar is both ecstatic and orgasmic.


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## Thatch (Mar 20, 2011)

Grycho said:


> Believe me when I say that wearing a collar is both ecstatic and orgasmic.


 
Not everyone is into autoerotic asphyxation, bro.


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## Ley (Mar 20, 2011)

I'm 16 and I have a leather collar with metal 'scales' used for cosplay of one of my own human characters. My mom has no idea that it's from the fandom or anything like that- because I never talk about it. All of my anthro art is on FA and I'm enough of a 'good, sweet, responsible and innocent child' around my parents that I'm not under suspicion.

Advice- Don't get it. You won't die if you don't have one.


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## Deo (Mar 20, 2011)

Leybun said:


> I'm 16 and I have a leather collar with metal 'scales' used for cosplay of one of my own human characters. My mom has no idea that it's from the fandom or anything like that- because I never talk about it. All of my anthro art is on FA and I'm enough of a 'good, sweet, responsible and innocent child' around my parents that I'm not under suspicion.
> 
> Advice- Don't get it. You won't die if you don't have one.


 Didn't you say your parents were furries?


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## Ley (Mar 20, 2011)

Deo said:


> Didn't you say your parents were furries?



They are, but my mom pretty much forbade me to do anything with it after she found god. Dad still draws, I think, but I haven't seen him since '09 when he married his fiance.


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## theinkfox (Mar 20, 2011)

different parents different visions, when i bought a fenrir wolf pendant from ebay, my mom said "why didnt you bought something nice for me", so i had to buy another pendant for her (triskelion amulet)
i think it's not such a big deal, just talk to your parents and say to them that it is a fashion thing


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## GoldenJackal (Mar 21, 2011)

I hate when kids ask the Internet how they can go against the rules of their legal guardian. You have no rights until you have a steady job and your own roof over your head. That's life.


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## epslion (Mar 21, 2011)

if your parents don't want you to have a collar just abide to there wishes it can wait, even an expensive collar wont go above 40 buck's, a reasonable price of you set aside some money after each pay check.


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## Xegras (Mar 21, 2011)

GoldenJackal said:


> I hate when kids ask the Internet how they can go against the rules of their legal guardian. You have no rights until you have a steady job and your own roof over your head. That's life.


 
But then how do I get in touch with my true animal spirit?


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## Taralack (Mar 21, 2011)

OP, if you seriously think getting advice from a furry forum is a good idea, you have a lot of growing up to do.

I'm sure you'll be able to live without a collar. And trust me when I say this - once you move out, you'll start to miss a lot of things you take for granted now.


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## GoldenJackal (Mar 21, 2011)

Xegras said:


> But then how do I get in touch with my true animal spirit?



Through Buddy Christ. Now do your damn homework.


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## Xegras (Mar 21, 2011)

GoldenJackal said:


> Through Buddy Christ. Now do your damn homework.



But but but I must wear a collar D:

It's the only way that I will truly be able to eat that rat thats running around the house. D:


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## GoldenJackal (Mar 21, 2011)

Xegras said:


> But but but I must wear a collar D:
> 
> It's the only way that I will truly be able to eat that rat thats running around the house. D:



I should have aborted you from your mother when I had the chance! Now go to your room after you finish that steak dinner and don't even think about using all those expensive electronics that I bought you with my own hard earned money.


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## Xegras (Mar 21, 2011)

GoldenJackal said:


> I should have aborted you from your mother when I had the chance! Now go to your room after you finish that steak dinner and don't even think about using all those expensive electronics that I bought you with my own hard earned money.



YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND ME! I TOTALLY KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!  THIS COLLAR SIGNIFIES MY COMPLETE AND UTTER LOVE FOR FOXES AND THAT I WILL ONE DAY ATTACH FUR TO MY SKIN TO BE WITH MY FOX BRETHERREN!


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## GoldenJackal (Mar 21, 2011)

Xegras said:


> YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND ME! I TOTALLY KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!  THIS COLLAR SIGNIFIES MY COMPLETE AND UTTER LOVE FOR FOXES AND THAT I WILL ONE DAY ATTACH FUR TO MY SKIN TO BE WITH MY FOX BRETHERREN!


 
I WOULD BEAT YOU IF THE REPETITIVE TASKS I PERFORM EVERY DAY AT THE PLANT HADEN'T GIVEN ME CARPAL TUNNEL IN MY ENTIRE BODY! I WILL NOW YELL AT YOU UNTIL I INFLICT EMOTIONAL SCARS!


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## Xegras (Mar 21, 2011)

GoldenJackal said:


> I WOULD BEAT YOU IF THE REPETITIVE TASKS I PERFORM EVERY DAY AT THE PLANT HADEN'T GIVEN ME CARPAL TUNNEL IN MY ENTIRE BODY! I WILL NOW YELL AT YOU UNTIL I INFLICT EMOTIONAL SCARS!


 
YOU ARE JUST SO MEAN! I TRY AND I TRY TO MAKE YOU PROUD BY BRING IN DEAD BIRDS AND DROPPING THEM AT YOUR FEET BUT YOU JUST KEEP TELLING ME NOT TO BE A FREAK! YOU DONT UNDERSTAND! D:


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## Volkodav (Mar 21, 2011)

Vaelarsa said:


> Wait...
> _*THIS*_ is the issue?
> 
> You do know that other people, on the street, will criticize the fuck out of you for it, and make their passing comments, too?
> ...


 
My friend [suuuppper goth] wore a dog collar to school once
I brought a thin dog leash to school the next day and choked him with it

JUST A WARNING


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## CrispSkittlez (Mar 21, 2011)

I used to wear a collar, then I realized it was dumb and I was dumb. I can now focus my energy into more productive things like playing Pokemon.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 21, 2011)

Alright everyone, i will definetly wait until i have grown up and have moved out, thank you for your input


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## Schwimmwagen (Mar 21, 2011)

xxLoisKentxx said:


> Alright everyone, i will definetly wait until i have grown up and have moved out, thank you for your input


 
By the time you grow up, you shouldn't even _want_ a collar.


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## xxLoisKentxx (Mar 21, 2011)

Gibby said:


> By the time you grow up, you shouldn't even _want_ a collar.


 
Exactly


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## Conker (Mar 22, 2011)

Gibby said:


> By the time you grow up, you shouldn't even _want_ a collar.


 I've grown up, but I still like my collars. I just don't wear them because doing so would be...silly :3


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## itswhatido20 (Mar 22, 2011)

hell I have a collar and never even wore it yet >.>


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