# Help describing aerial views?



## Marina Neira (Sep 11, 2012)

I've never made a post on a writer's forum before but after struggling with this all day, I thought I may find some help here. I'm not looking for anyone to do my job for me, but I'm really stuck. 

I am currently writing a scene on which a young dragon is taking his first flight alone at night. When dawn breaks, he is greeted by his first true view of the land on which he lives. I want to describe everything he sees, and this is where I am having trouble.

I guess I am just not sure where to begin describing, and what. I can tell you he is flying very high, enough that there is some cloud cover between him and the land. There are settlements, towns and rudimentary roads, all of which he has never seen before, and would not recognize as such.

Even certain natural features such a river, he would see but not know what he is looking at. There is so much he would see and not recognize that it makes description awfully difficult for me.

It doesn't help matters that, while I've been writing in English for over ten years, it isn't my native tongue. I'm at the point where I've forgotten most of the ability to write good prose that I'd developed in my youth when writing in Spanish. But I have not yet developed the same ability in English. It's getting better, and sometimes I actually write better in English than I ever did in Spanish when I'm on a roll (especially dialogue) but sometimes I get stuck in this way with description and this time I just can't seem to move forward.

Any advice, guys? If anyone could drop one or two sentences at me of prose describing an aerial view of a forest, mountainous area, etc that I could use as a starting point it would help me lots. I just need something to get me unstuck.

Thanks in advance!


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## sunandshadow (Sep 11, 2012)

Go to youtube and watch movies taken from airplanes.


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## Marina Neira (Sep 11, 2012)

sunandshadow said:


> Go to youtube and watch movies taken from airplanes.



Thank you, but that doesn't really help me. I'm struggling to find words to describe the scenery; I know what the scenery looks like. I downloaded some photos that match the landscape I want to describe pretty well, but I'm still struggling to find the right words --at least a starting point of some sort, that actually sounds good when read and has a pleasant flow. This is where I am stuck.


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## dinosaurdammit (Sep 11, 2012)

Marina Neira said:


> Thank you, but that doesn't really help me. I'm struggling to find words to describe the scenery; I know what the scenery looks like. I downloaded some photos that match the landscape I want to describe pretty well, but I'm still struggling to find the right words --at least a starting point of some sort, that actually sounds good when read and has a pleasant flow. This is where I am stuck.


give me a photo and i will try and lay an example


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## Marina Neira (Sep 11, 2012)

dinosaurdammit said:


> give me a photo and i will try and lay an example



Thank you so much. These two would be good examples:

https://dl.dropbox.com/u/21151542/Nature-Green-Mountain-Beauty-520x390.jpg

https://dl.dropbox.com/u/21151542/k...ountains-in-distance_i-G-28-2886-2X6PD00Z.jpg

That first one appears to show some settlements on the mountainside and he would be seeing this kind of thing. The second one is a good idea of the first thing that would greet his eyes as the sun spills over it all.

This one too: https://dl.dropbox.com/u/21151542/D...ational-Park-Ogooué-Ivindo-province-Gabon.jpg

Sorry to give a few; I couldn't settle on one.  I think once I have a couple of sentences, or even just one, of the initial image, I can go into detail by having him fly down and explore. It's that first glance at everything that I find intimidating to write. Thank you!


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## dinosaurdammit (Sep 11, 2012)

Marina Neira said:


> Thank you so much. These two would be good examples:
> 
> https://dl.dropbox.com/u/21151542/Nature-Green-Mountain-Beauty-520x390.jpg
> 
> ...








Looking down into the rift where it seemed as if god had drawn a finger through the earth as it was soft, I saw the greenest trees. The air was chrisp and clean. Sound of birds filled my inner ear. I land and the rocky clay soil shifted beneath my feet as if beckoning me to come down into the valley to see what else laid beyond the tree line. In the distance I see a lone mountain, almost defying the landscape with its noble face. Lush and green this landscape fills me with peace. The quiet and stillness, the wind as if nature is breathing against my face like a long lost lover.






The roar of 1000 horses hooves hammer into my brain. Looking down I see the white water biting at the rocks, snarling in vast currents and spilling over as if a mad army is flowing with gravity into a singularity. The water flows down and is welcomed by a lush and thick jungle. The trees grope to the shoreline so much so that the river disappears and two forces merge into a single form of beauty. Tall canopies filled with aromas I have never even dreamed of, flowers of every shape and color dot and change up the otherwise solid multigreen carpet. The water vapor fills the air and the updraft blows against my face causing a smile to creep across my face.


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## Marina Neira (Sep 11, 2012)

dinosaurdammit said:


> Looking down into the rift where it seemed as if god had drawn a finger through the earth as it was soft, I saw the greenest trees. The air was chrisp and clean. Sound of birds filled my inner ear. I land and the rocky clay soil shifted beneath my feet as if beckoning me to come down into the valley to see what else laid beyond the tree line. In the distance I see a lone mountain, almost defying the landscape with its noble face. Lush and green this landscape fills me with peace. The quiet and stillness, the wind as if nature is breathing against my face like a long lost lover.
> 
> The roar of 1000 horses hooves hammer into my brain. Looking down I see the white water biting at the rocks, snarling in vast currents and spilling over as if a mad army is flowing with gravity into a singularity. The water flows down and is welcomed by a lush and thick jungle. The trees grope to the shoreline so much so that the river disappears and two forces merge into a single form of beauty. Tall canopies filled with aromas I have never even dreamed of, flowers of every shape and color dot and change up the otherwise solid multigreen carpet. The water vapor fills the air and the updraft blows against my face causing a smile to creep across my face.



Thank you. Some of this will help me with later descriptions, and I will keep it in mind. 

The main problem is that, again, he doesn't know what most of what he is looking at even is. He is very young and this is his first glimpse at the world. So I kind of need to describe these things without saying outright what they are. Of course, what they actually are should be evident to the reader by the description, and that's where it gets tricky. If you'd never seen a mountain or a waterfall, or a forest from above, how would you describe these things if you did not really know what they were?

(Granted, he knows what a tree is, and he knows what water is, so that should be taken into consideration.)

I would appreciate anyone else's input, I really don't need anything very long (though I deeply appreciate your help!) mostly 1-2 sentences for when he first sees that vast expanse of nature.

I should probably add, this is told from a third person omniscient P.O.V., and is intended from a 9-12 year old audience, so it shouldn't be TOO complex.


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## Poetigress (Sep 12, 2012)

The first question should be, what _does_ he know? Has he grown up in a cave? Have there been short trips outside? Once you have a solid idea of what the character _is_ familiar with, then you can have him comparing what he's seeing to what he knows. If I've never seen an ocean, but I've seen a pond or a river, I'm probably going to describe the ocean by comparing and contrasting it with the pond or the river. A ridge of mountains could look the way his mother's ridged back did to him when he was small, or a glitter of water might make him think of dragon scales. It might also help to focus less on the description of the actual things themselves, and more on the description of how he reacts, physically and emotionally, to seeing all of it.


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