# The HOPELESS RP



## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 26, 2016)

(Thought about making one thread here just for my amusement)

Let's play a little simple game. You are in a waiting room with cold steel walls and dim light. You hear a loud buzz and see a green dot light up and stand out on the other side, under it a door automatically opening. What do you do?
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Post here and I will continue your scenario. By the way, if you die, you fucking die (you're out, otherwise you'll continue to be killed off). If I like you (Which I doubt I will), then I might keep your scenario going for a while longer....

By posting here, your scenario is at my mercy, so you agree to be potentially offended to an extreme degree and possibly suffer some damage (to your ego).


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## Aaron Whitepaw (Sep 26, 2016)

*goes through door*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 26, 2016)

Aaron Whitepaw said:


> *goes through door*


You are blinded momentarily by a brilliant light, and almost as if you've entered a different world, you are in a new environment with grassy hills, blue skies, a big canyon that features a large ramp and some methods of transport (Motorcycle, Bus, Skateboard) that could be used to jump the canyon, a very big hole in the ground that seems bottomless, a fence which seems like a boundary to another area, and a chocolate bar on the ground.

What do you do?


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## Aaron Whitepaw (Sep 26, 2016)

*jump over canyon with ramp, while on motorcycle. eat chocolate at other side*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 26, 2016)

Aaron Whitepaw said:


> *jump over canyon with ramp, while on motorcycle. eat chocolate at other side*


Not a bad jump, wise choice of vehicle since buses suck and you probably aren't a good skater if you are one at all. Hope your crotch doesn't hurt too much after a hard landing impact like that (I hope it does).

When you finish the chocolate bar, you see that on the wrapper the expiration date has expired long ago.....but for now, you're okay. However, there is no going back.

On the side of the canyon you are on, you see that it is pretty rocky and becomes a desert. On the canyon cliff you see some rappelling gear and a rushing river at the bottom, and far but not to far away in the desert, to see tall dead tree.

What do you do?


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## Aaron Whitepaw (Sep 26, 2016)

*abseil down to the water, scoop some up for later, climb back up. walks to dead tree*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 26, 2016)

While climbing back up, you got attacked by an owl and acquired some scratches and had your nose squeezed almost to the point of breaking by its powerful talons, but survived.

When you arrive at the tree, you notice its dead, a strangely tall dead manzanita tree. It's getting dark fast. You see owls start to perch on the tree, a hollowed out section in the tree trunk, and in the distance, and an orange glow by some rocks not too far away.

What do you do?


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## Aaron Whitepaw (Sep 26, 2016)

*goes over to orange glow. finds out its lava. boils and purifies water with the heat. drinks water. goes over to dead tree. giver the finger to owls. makes shelter from branches on ground*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 26, 2016)

While boiling the water, you learned the hard way why getting close to lava is not a smart thing to do and caught on fire, suffering some second degree burns. You've lost a good amount of your epidermis (and fur) and some of your clothes has melded with your skin, if you were wearing any.

Since you didn't learn the first time, you learn now that the owls don't take kindly to strangers, especially ones that don't think about consequences of actions. Not long after getting into your shelter, the owls gang up and knock it down. The pull you out of the rubble and start wailing on you. Some hold your arms and legs while others gut-shot you, they simultaneously and rapidly attack you from all directions, and then they knock you down and start kicking and stomping you. When they finish, they fly off into the night now satisfied. Them owls are tough motherfuckers who take no prisoners....

You are left all alone, in the middle of the night on the sand, beaten horribly to the point of being in too much pain to move. Well, at least you got the whole night left to possibly rest and recover, and think about you're actions and what just happened.

By the way, that expired chocolate bar you ate earlier is now acting up in your body. Without going into detail, you get diarrhea....


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## Aaron Whitepaw (Sep 26, 2016)

*craps on floor, waits while healing. stands up. looks in hollow bit of tree. finds shotgun. stealthily sneaks up on owls. jumps up and blasts the shiz out of the owls while swearing and yelling*
THIS IS WHAT YOU GET, YOU STUPID SACKS O SHITE.
(now you know that however much the owls like revenge, I never forget an insult,* I* *am much, much worse*)
*only one heavily injured owl flies off. collects owl corpses. walks over to lava. *carefully *throws them in lava, then craps on them. returns to dead tree. finds trapdoor. goes down trapdoor. finds hidden bunker. finds pack of medkits. heals more. explores rest of bunker. its empty, except for a few rusty AK-47's. finds a bed. carefully checks room for traps and stuff. finds nothing. goes to sleep*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 26, 2016)

Aaron Whitepaw said:


> *craps on floor, waits while healing. stands up. looks in hollow bit of tree. finds shotgun. stealthily sneaks up on owls. jumps up and blasts the shiz out of the owls while swearing and yelling*
> THIS IS WHAT YOU GET, YOU STUPID SACKS O SHITE.
> (now you know that however much the owls like revenge, I never forget an insult,* I* *am much, much worse*)
> *only one heavily injured owl flies off. collects owl corpses. walks over to lava. *carefully *throws them in lava, then craps on them. returns to dead tree. finds trapdoor. goes down trapdoor. finds hidden bunker. finds pack of medkits. heals more. explores rest of bunker. its empty, except for a few rusty AK-47's. finds a bed. carefully checks room for traps and stuff. finds nothing. goes to sleep*


Since you like to do everything in one go, you miss the Lembas in the hollow during your haste to grab the shotgun, shoot an entire group of owls who in your rage thought was the group you kicked your ass (you also shot a few children), get some more burns from being around the lava (burning your ass while attempting your degrading act on their corpses in the lava), and the trapdoor locks itself from the outside so you can't go out that way.

By the way, do you just use random medkits you find in a bunker? I should probably mention that those are not sterile.....you know have an infection.

The AK's have been fused with the rust to the point of being unusable.

Well, at least the bed is a Temperpedic, so that's a plus....


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## Azrion/Zhalo (Sep 26, 2016)

You're right, this RP is hopeless


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 27, 2016)

Azrion/Zhalo said:


> You're right, this RP is hopeless


You are on a beautiful field full of what seems like millions of flowers of varying colors as far as the eye can see. You see several patches of flowers concentrated together like a pile of leaves and they look fun to jump in, you notice a tall humanoid figure in the distance, and you see the start of a forest area.

What do you do?


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## Aaron Whitepaw (Sep 27, 2016)

Maximor_Bloodpanda said:


> Since you like to do everything in one go, you miss the Lembas in the hollow during your haste to grab the shotgun, shoot an entire group of owls who in your rage thought was the group you kicked your ass (you also shot a few children), get some more burns from being around the lava (burning your ass while attempting your degrading act on their corpses in the lava), and the trapdoor locks itself from the outside so you can't go out that way.
> 
> By the way, do you just use random medkits you find in a bunker? I should probably mention that those are not sterile.....you know have an infection.
> 
> ...


*craps on floor. wakes up. drinks some of the purified water. gets shotgun. goes up to trapdoor, avoiding any traps. blasts out of bunker, *carefully*, avoiding shrapnel. one of the bits of shrapnel hits a button on the wall. it opens a secret compartment. the compartment has no traps or anything bad in it. it has a RPG in it. the RPG has plenty of ammunition and is in perfect condition. there is also some armour in perfect condition, with no traps or anything bad in or on it, in there also. puts the *lightweight* armour on. goes up trapdoor,* carefully.* realises the owls I killed we not the right ones. found right owls. kills them all, with nothing bad coming from it*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 27, 2016)

Aaron Whitepaw said:


> *craps on floor. wakes up. drinks some of the purified water. gets shotgun. goes up to trapdoor, avoiding any traps. blasts out of bunker, *carefully*, avoiding shrapnel. one of the bits of shrapnel hits a button on the wall. it opens a secret compartment. the compartment has no traps or anything bad in it. it has a RPG in it. the RPG has plenty of ammunition and is in perfect condition. there is also some armour in perfect condition, with no traps or anything bad in or on it, in there also. puts armour on. goes up trapdoor,* carefully.* realises the owls I killed we not the right ones. found right owls. kills them all, with nothing bad coming from it*


Everything seemed to go pretty well.

But then you start feeling dizzy, and begin to uncontrollably vomit. Your body starts to feel very hot, like you are burning up.

In your haste, you have wandered too close to a radioactive waste dump. You are pretty weak right now, and might have to lose some equipment to carry yourself to safety, or die refusing to let go.

Think wisely, or you might start growing dicks out of your face, or worse....


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## Aaron Whitepaw (Sep 27, 2016)

*shoots RPG rockets at distant dead tree for fun, then drops empty RPG. carry's on walking. finds secret labatory. goes inside. it looks a lot like the Institute from fo4. but with a lot less people. goes in room. finds some people in lab coats. explains situation to them. they heal me back up. I share jokes with people. they become my friends*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 27, 2016)

Aaron Whitepaw said:


> *shoots RPG rockets at distant dead tree for fun, then drops empty RPG. carry's on walking. finds secret labatory. goes inside. it looks a lot like the Institute from fo4. but with a lot less people. goes in room. finds some people in lab coats. explains situation to them. they heal me back up. I share jokes with people. they become my friends*


Turns out the place is the Institute. After being healed (and probed), you, an outsider are given some work in return to hunt down a powerful guy who has revolted against the Institute. Almost before your employer is done talking, you hear explosions in the distance and chaos begins to take place as the various sections are locked down. You see synths in battle armor and heavily armed coursers set up a defensive.

The large elevator in the center of the atrium starts coming down, carrying a group of rough and heavily armed men, with one who you assume is the leader in the front.

As soon as the doors open, bullets and lasers are exchanged all over the place. You point your shotgun and fire at one of the aggressors. *Click*. It's empty, you should've reloaded. The guy just laughs, and takes his time to aim, and he shoots you in the side, wounding you. In the chaos, you scurry away up a stairwell and  hide in a room, where an old man lies on his deathbed.

When the firing stops, the leader of the attack enters the room, criticizes the old bastard and puts him in his place, then brutally beat then shoot him until he looks like swiss cheese. He is very satisfied, covered in the blood of the old man. He then notices you. He remembers the start of his journey and how he made it all the way to this point. He remembers Kellogg's demise, all because of a loose end. This guy knows better than to spare someone who can come back to get him, so he's not taking any chances with you, just like with all the unarmed but malicious Institute Scientists.






He walks up to you (lying on the floor), then drags his knife across your throat, streams of crimson pouring out all over the place, with you gurgling and choking on your own blood as you try to gasp for air. It's all over, all the colors just turn to grey, and the light is swallowed by darkness......





Thanks for playing!


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## Azrion/Zhalo (Sep 27, 2016)

This was a shit story m8.


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## real time strategist (Sep 27, 2016)

*walks in* i am ready to become completely obliterated


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 28, 2016)

Azrion/Zhalo said:


> This was a shit story m8.


Since all you do is nothing but make a pointless judgement, you don't notice the tall man and some accomplices come to knock you out. They lay you out on the ground, ready to castrate you, but since they can't find a dick, they just dismember you instead.


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 28, 2016)

real time strategist said:


> *walks in* i am ready to become completely obliterated


Walks into where? Surprise motherfucker, you walked into a wall! That hurts your nose, but you're okay for now. You should probably watch where you are walking from now on....

Anyway, you turn around and see that you are in a dark castle of some sort. It almost feels like you're in another era too.

You get chills. Something evil is nearby. There is a stairwell leading to the second floor, one leading to the basement, two similar looking hallways on the sides (right and left), and a door to outside.

What do you do?


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## real time strategist (Sep 28, 2016)

*goes down to the basement while saying* "hello evil presence that i know is there because.... magic i guess?"


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## Maximus B. Panda (Sep 30, 2016)

real time strategist said:


> *goes down to the basement while saying* "hello evil presence that i know is there because.... magic i guess?"


Straight into the basement, wow that's smart....

You get no response. You realize the degree of evil the unknown entity has to choose to give you the silent treatment.

The basement stairwell actually turns out to lead into some sort of labyrinth. The area is huge, the architecture shouldn't even be physically possible.

You can climb up some large stone blocks in the center, cross a very thin bridge that looks like it has no supports, or you could go back.

What do you do?


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## real time strategist (Sep 30, 2016)

"fuck you too evil" *goes back up then goes to the hallway to the right*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Oct 5, 2016)

real time strategist said:


> "fuck you too evil" *goes back up then goes to the hallway to the right*


You feel the chills, the unknown force is closer.

The hall leads to a big room that seems empty, save for a stone staircase in the center of the room that goes up, but seemingly goes nowhere. 

What do you do?


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## real time strategist (Oct 6, 2016)

*goes up the stairwell*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Oct 7, 2016)

real time strategist said:


> *goes up the stairwell*


You feel dread, like you shouldn't be on those stairs...

Before you know it, it seems like you are in another world. It is a forest, grey sky and it seems to be fall. There is no wind. You see what appear to be leaves falling, but they don't fall, they just remain suspended in the air.

The stairs are gone. You are standing on the leafy forest floor. There is a tall mountain, a meadow, and a dirt path.

What do you do?


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## real time strategist (Oct 10, 2016)

*goes up the mountain to freeze to death*


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## Maximus B. Panda (Oct 16, 2016)

real time strategist said:


> *goes up the mountain to freeze to death*


Freezing actually turns out to be a lot worse than it sounds. An intense blizzard comes over the area. You are cold

You feel your body shutting down, but somehow you keep going. You start losing sensation in your legs, and it becomes difficult to walk.

Somehow, despite the sounds of the high winds blowing, everything just goes silent. You suddenly turn around, as if forced to do so, and before you, barely visible in the thick snowfall, is a dark figure, shape of some sort of deer, but all...messed up. As it slowly walks....upright....approaching you, you notice it's features. It has lanky proportions like a stretched out person, its antlers are wildly formed unlike any deer you've seen before and appear to be covered in ripped and messy velvet, it's posture is unbalanced, it seems to lean impossibly forward towards you. You cannot bring yourself to look at it's face. 

Just as it touches you, you fall to the ground. A loud ringing in your head like something trying to get out of it, the world around you turns to black. As your sight is taken away from you, you scream as loud as you can, but then even the sounds of your own screams become inaudible even though you can feel your mouth moving and know what you are trying to say. Your jaw starts to feel like it is being drilled into, with a new horrible buzzing to accompany it. You can't even feel your own body.

The world around you is gone, you are gone. Just a lost conscience in a dark abyss.

......


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## real time strategist (Oct 17, 2016)

*welp i am now stuck here forever, the deer thing didn't even bother to kill me*


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## RileyTheOtter (Oct 18, 2016)

(figure i'll start my scenario)
*walks out the door*


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## EdgyMemeLord0 (Oct 18, 2016)

Well, I could start my scenario
*Goes trough the door*


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