# Femboys



## Inkblooded (Jan 29, 2018)

This bothers me a lot so I am going to ask here for opinions, as a kind of experiment or survey.

What does the term "femboy" mean to you?
Please elaborate.

Do you think it is a gay thing? 
Do you think "femboys" have to be promiscuous or very sexual in nature?
Do you think that, in a relationship, the "femboy" character has to be sexually submissive or "bottom"?*

*dont have to answer if you dont know what that means

If so why?

I want to know exactly what the general consensus on this term is. I am trying to find out if it is just means "femboy" or is a very specific trope.

Also, please be civil with this discussion. Any insults or baiting on this thread will get you blocked


----------



## SlyRiolu (Jan 29, 2018)

I think femboys are just guys who act like a stereotypical girl.


----------



## Dongding (Jan 29, 2018)

A feminine looking boy. We see the generalized stereotype everywhere basically tossing them around as cute little sex objects, though.


----------



## EmpressCiela (Jan 29, 2018)

I define the term "femboy" as a boy that acts/looks feminine. Simple as that. Dressing up with female-oriented clothing (lingerie included) isn't a necessity in my eyes, but it is a common thing to do. As for the promiscuity and homosexuality, I believe that those aspects are more stereotypes than requirements. I myself am _far_ from promiscuous, and I know a good number of femboys that only like females.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 29, 2018)

I am a femboy TOP, hunty! Even so, I left my promiscuous days in college. Now I just want my partner
Girly bois are usually gay, but I find it super refreshing when they're not! More guys should branch out with their fashion sense, and have fun with colours and soft textures.
I personally insist that femboy is defined as any male that dresses in feminine clothes. They don't have to act girly or anything, just the aesthetic matters.
People are inevitably going to make it into a stupid trope, but at least it won't be as offensive as c---boy. That's an awful, hurtful, overly-sexualized term.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 29, 2018)

Dongding said:


> A feminine looking boy. We see the generalized stereotype everywhere basically tossing them around as cute little sex objects, though.


I want to see a femboy that plays sports and can beat people up! That would be AWESOME!


----------



## Inkblooded (Jan 29, 2018)

Zehlua said:


> I want to see a femboy that plays sports and can beat people up! That would be AWESOME!



he exists

@KILL.MAIM.KILL 

dont call him a femboy though


----------



## Inkblooded (Jan 29, 2018)

Also, how do you people define "feminine?"
Do you mean feminine in physical appearance? or to you, is it more about clothes and personality?


----------



## EmpressCiela (Jan 29, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> Also, how do you people define "feminine?"
> Do you mean feminine in physical appearance? or to you, is it more about clothes and personality?


I see it as more of a personality and attire thing. Typically, the physical aspect soon follows, though not in every case.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 29, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> Also, how do you people define "feminine?"
> Do you mean feminine in physical appearance? or to you, is it more about clothes and personality?


Clothes! Clothes! Clothes! Fashion! Hair style! Makeup! Nails! Jewelry! Anything a manly man wouldn't dream of wearing!


----------



## Inkblooded (Jan 29, 2018)

So, is the general opinion that a "femboy" is a regular male who crossdresses, instead of a male that has feminine physical features naturally?


----------



## EmpressCiela (Jan 29, 2018)

That's one way to put it. Though I wouldn't call the answers of just two a proper general consensus. I could ask around if you want. It'd yield more accurate results


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 29, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> So, is the general opinion that a "femboy" is a regular male who crossdresses, instead of a male that has feminine physical features naturally?


He could totally have curves like my fursona does! And long eyelashes and hair!


----------



## Water Draco (Jan 29, 2018)

A male with what may be considered as having feminine traits. But are no different to any other human, and have the right to be treated with out prejudice as would any other human being would expect to be treated.


----------



## Dongding (Jan 29, 2018)

I used feminine in reference to appearance. Fair/dainty features and the like.

Honestly it's not something I know a whole lot about, so this is a good "clueless outsider" result for your survey.


----------



## Inkblooded (Jan 29, 2018)

AkuroZinnui said:


> That's one way to put it. Though I wouldn't call the answers of just two a proper general consensus. I could ask around if you want. It'd yield more accurate results



That is what i am aiming for



Mikazuki Marazhu said:


> Femboys are girls with dicks :V
> I prefer not being around them



That depends. if said character has female reproductive organs too then they aren't a "femboy," I don't think.


----------



## EmpressCiela (Jan 29, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> That is what i am aiming for


I'll send you my findings over Discord Friday morning, then


----------



## Yantiskra (Jan 30, 2018)

I think it's just there's such a great amount of sexual femboy art it's hard not to see them only as a sex symbol. While it can be more.


----------



## KILL.MAIM.KILL (Jan 30, 2018)

As a feminine male myself...
Well, you know what I'm going to say.
That shit's nasty. And you're also nasty if you're into it.
Try your daddy dom nonsense on me, and it will be your asshole that gets destroyed.

To answer the topic's question, that depends on whether we're talking about fictional characters, or real people.

A fictional character femboy is an ugly anime furry with thighs so big, he'd realistically have severe health complications from obesity, and would be unable to move. 
Add the ugliest, most impractical, and unfashionable outfit you can think of, as well as an eerily childlike personality to appeal to the pedophiles, and boom.
You've got yourself a femboy original character!

As for real people, well. The only real people who call themselves femboys tend to be greasy-haired, nerdy young gay men.
The kind who spend all of their waking hours playing videogames, watching anime, and living in their mom's basement.

I know, I know. You're going to get angry at me for existing.
I mean, just how _dare_ I want to be treated as a normal person, instead of someone's depraved, and borderline pedophilic fantasy?


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 30, 2018)

KILL.MAIM.KILL said:


> As a feminine male myself...
> Well, you know what I'm going to say.
> That shit's nasty. And you're also nasty if you're into it.
> Try your daddy dom nonsense on me, and it will be your asshole that gets destroyed.
> ...


This post tastes bitter.

I get what you mean with being treated horribly by fetishists. That's why I refuse to use words like "shemale" and "c---boy." People don't know how to put their gross dicks away and behave respectfully.

Tbh, most of the femboys I know and have met are just guys that dress in cute girly clothes. Maybe they have curves and soft hair. Almost all of them are highly hygienic. That's pretty much the extent of it.

My partner is a femboy, and he and I share a common interest in fashion, hairstyling, and makeup. I consider myself a bit of a femboy as well, if not an all-out drag queen at times.

I'm angry that femboys are becoming the gay lolitas, you dig?


----------



## KILL.MAIM.KILL (Jan 30, 2018)

Zehlua said:


> This post tastes bitter.
> 
> I get what you mean with being treated horribly by fetishists. That's why I refuse to use words like "shemale" and "c---boy." People don't know how to put their gross dicks away and behave respectfully.
> 
> ...




There's a difference between being a feminine boy, and a transvestite or drag queen, who are usually embarrassing mockeries of women rather than someone who happens to be feminine.

I have a feminine _body_. To hell with scary drag makeup and ugly pink clothes.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 30, 2018)

KILL.MAIM.KILL said:


> There's a difference between being a feminine boy, and a transvestite or drag queen, who are usually embarrassing mockeries of women rather than someone who happens to be feminine.
> 
> I have a feminine _body_. To hell with scary drag makeup and ugly pink clothes.



Drag queens have actually developed their own culture. What started as a caricature of women turned into its own completely separate performance. We all know good and well no "normal" woman looks, talks, or acts that way. It's kind of like wrestling, where you know it's pretty scripted, but you watch it for the entertainment. The fakeness is our realness.

Some drag queens DO have some pretty ugly makeup, but it's usually on purpose and part of the fun! Other drag queens are elegant, silly, scary, and artsy. It just depends on the queen's style and what she's going for.

You don't have to have loud pink frills and marabou to be in drag. Literally any dress will do.

I know you've been treated really badly by creeps, and you're totally allowed to not like drag culture as a result. I just ask that you please be respectful to those of us who do.


----------



## KILL.MAIM.KILL (Jan 30, 2018)

Zehlua said:


> Drag queens have actually developed their own culture. What started as a caricature of women turned into its own completely separate performance. We all know good and well no "normal" woman looks, talks, or acts that way. It's kind of like wrestling, where you know it's pretty scripted, but you watch it for the entertainment. The fakeness is our realness.
> 
> Some drag queens DO have some pretty ugly makeup, but it's usually on purpose and part of the fun! Other drag queens are elegant, silly, scary, and artsy. It just depends on the queen's style and what she's going for.
> 
> ...



Blah blah blah _blah_. Heard it all before, blah blah it's gay culture now blah blah we're not sexist because it's tradition.

Yeah, no, sorry but making fun of the way women act - no, the twisted way you _think_ women act - for entertainment is still sexist.
I don't care if it's a staple of the gay community, that's no excuse for sexism or discrimination of any kind.

Also, wearing a dress itself isn't being in drag.
Anyone can wear whatever they want, and drag is very specific, so I don't think I'm a drag queen if I decide to wear a simple black dress.
No.

Anyway. This is irrelevant.
The topic is about femboys, not transvestites.
Different thing. Though, in my opinion, equally revolting.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 30, 2018)

No one in any way thinks women act like that. Seriously. I don't understand where all this rage is coming from.

If you are a dude in a dress, that's drag by definition, regardless of how simple the outfit is.

Can you please not use the word transvestites? That's not a cool thing to say.


----------



## Inkblooded (Jan 30, 2018)

Zehlua said:


> No one in any way thinks women act like that. Seriously. I don't understand where all this rage is coming from.
> 
> If you are a dude in a dress, that's drag by definition, regardless of how simple the outfit is.
> 
> Can you please not use the word transvestites? That's not a cool thing to say.




please calm down. as I said in the first post, please keep the topic civil and do not make it heated.

KILL.MAIM.KILL is right - a male in a dress and a dress alone is not "in drag." Drag is a very specific community and if i recall, drag queens themselves dont take kindly to people "appropriating" anything from them.

I am male and I have worn a dress. it is not drag. first of all I pass for a female so it doesnt look weird to anyone. secondly drag involves creating a show persona and is a big dramatic thing. Me choosing to wear clothes "for women" casually isnt drag, not in any sense.

whats wrong with the word transvestite? Its just another term for crossdresser.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 30, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> please calm down. as I said in the first post, please keep the topic civil and do not make it heated.
> 
> KILL.MAIM.KILL is right - a male in a dress and a dress alone is not "in drag." Drag is a very specific community and if i recall, drag queens themselves dont take kindly to people "appropriating" anything from them.
> 
> ...


I'd like to calm down, too. I'm very confused about how this got heated in the first place .___.

You're right! Drag is a culture of its own, but I've seen it used to describe any dress-wearing dude. This includes Timon using it to describe his hula outfit in The Lion King. However, I could be totally wrong in how I'm using the term in present day.

Sort of how transvestite wasn't a super hurtful slur back when Rocky Horror was made.


----------



## Deleted member 115426 (Jan 30, 2018)

Why is kill maim kill always such an asshat?


----------



## Deleted member 115426 (Jan 30, 2018)

Anyways to me a femboy seems like well, a feminine( probably butchered that word ) boy. They have a girly figure and usually tend to wear clothes that are very woman-like. There's nothing wrong with being a femboy of course. To each their own. (Side note Transvestite is a very derogetory term. Use transexual plz. )


----------



## Deleted member 111470 (Jan 31, 2018)

As far as I understand it, a femboy is a guy who actively wants to present himself in a feminine manner - physique, appearance, they way he acts, etc.  Not to say flamboyant but uhm... I'm not sure if there's a word for what I have in mind. Like just sort of an appearance and farce thing?
In the fandom fembois are probably over-sexualized, like many other things. It might give people a false sense or expectation of reality but that's how things are. Now for the questions:

*1. Do you think it is a gay thing? *

Not necessarily. Those glam rock dudes from the 80s were looking quite feminine but probably most of them weren't gay. I remember watching an interview with Dee Snider(Twisted Sister front-man) and he said his wife helped him put on his makeup and the girly clothes. IIRC it was in the movie "Metal, a headbanger's journey", but I can't find the exact scene.

*2. Do you think "femboys" have to be promiscuous or very sexual in nature?*

No. It's up to the person whether they or their characters have to be very naughty. Yeah, I know libido is something we either have or don't, but one can always choose how to behave. It's not that difficult.

*3. Do you think that, in a relationship, the "femboy" character has to be sexually submissive or "bottom"?*

No, but I can understand the appeal, and I see nothing wrong with it.

IRL I've met a "femboy" only once and he was one of the nicest people I've had the pleasure of talking to. I couldn't care less if he was gay or not, I never brought up the subject and neither did he. We had a nice conversation about life and that was it.


----------



## SugarCrimes (Jan 31, 2018)

To me, Femboys are just boys who act and, sometimes, dress as the stereotypical girly girl tbh
I don't think they need to be gay really and tbh a Femboy can be Top XP
I personally just find it cute, as long as they're happy with that :3 I kinda hate it when people see em' as a "just for sexual desires thing", like how people fetishize sexualities, buuuuuut what can I do aye?


----------



## Water Draco (Jan 31, 2018)

There are many types of ethnic dress around the world where it is not uncommon for men to weare clothing such as a skirt / dress. 

The clothing you expect to see people wearing is a result of how your perception has been conditioned with in the community in which you live. 

So when you see something unusual to what you would normally expect it stands out. This can also tye in with our primal instincts to be weary of things we perceive to be unusual until we have a better understanding of what it is we are encountering. 

If a person wishes to present them selves in a particular way as there expression of individuality so be it. 

It would be very shallow to judge an individual on just there appearance without getting to know them as an individual.


----------



## 34pokemon (Jan 31, 2018)

I think femboys are just really fem pretty boys?? Like boys that enjoy wearing dress etc, etc . I dont believe theres anything inherently sexual about it unless the femboy himself is doing it as a sexual thing i guess


----------



## Sergei Sóhomo (Jan 31, 2018)

To me they're just very effeminate men
Being extremely promiscuous just kinda feeds into that whole stereotype about gay men. I don't think they need to inherently be as such to be considered feminine
It's quite common for them to be the dependent, but if they're independent then that doesn't really change it



Inkblooded said:


> Also, how do you people define "feminine?"
> Do you mean feminine in physical appearance? or to you, is it more about clothes and personality?



Clothing and general attitude that shies away from the typical masculine norm is considered feminine. Though not everything is defined as those since there are neutral characteristics shared by both sexes


----------



## backpawscratcher (Jan 31, 2018)

I've met a few over the years, and found them to be some of the most courageous and wonderful people you could possibly hope to meet.  Courageous is a very good adjective too.  They don't hide who they are, which means they sometimes have to put up with extremely negative reactions.  And they bear it, wear it, and come out fighting.  

If it weren't for people like that the whole LGBT rights movement would be much further behind where it currently sits.


----------



## BahgDaddy (Jan 31, 2018)

Femboiz are SO SEXY

(I'm just being snarky.)

I don't really see it as any big deal? Just let people be who they want to be?


----------



## Inkblooded (Jan 31, 2018)

Ok.
So... sexual/gay or not, the term "Femboy" seems to be more about clothes and acting a certain way, than something like physical appearance due to hormonal conditions...

Im not sure how I feel about that. I dont believe clothes or behavior are gendered, and I dont think a man suddenly becomes feminine by wearing women's clothes.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 31, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> Ok.
> So... sexual/gay or not, the term "Femboy" seems to be more about clothes and acting a certain way, than something like physical appearance due to hormonal conditions...
> 
> Im not sure how I feel about that. I dont believe clothes or behavior are gendered, and I dont think a man suddenly becomes feminine by wearing women's clothes.


Gender means something different to everyone.
For me, it's often how I feel and dress. Gender is a sincere performance and the expressions of my heart. It's a deeply personal experience that I share with others through thoughtfully picked out clothes. My fashion always reflects how I feel, and there are NO exceptions to this rule.
You can have a big hairy man in a tutu, and he can be grumpy and awkward about it. Or he can be really into that form of expression, and it will probably allow him to act more feminine (gentler, nurturing, soft-voiced, as opposed to assertive, independent, and more outspoken.)
There are traits that we as a society put into camps of Male and Female. As a genderfluid person, I enjoy grabbing whatever traits I like and running with them. I dress as I please, act as I please, and it registers as eclectic.
You can have a curvy boy with limp wrists and long hair, but he can still be firmly male. There will be other things he does or wears to express his gender, like men's clothes and playing typically masculine sports. He may even avoid using soaps that make him smell feminine.

Gender has so many forms of expression... I could write a book or something on how varied it is.

Honestly? I COMPLETELY bypass what a person's body looks like most of the time. I don't give a hoot n' a holler what junk is in your trunk, or whether or not you have boobs or limp wrists. It's all about how the person presents themself.


----------



## Sergei Sóhomo (Jan 31, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> Ok.
> So... sexual/gay or not, the term "Femboy" seems to be more about clothes and acting a certain way, than something like physical appearance due to hormonal conditions...
> 
> Im not sure how I feel about that. I dont believe clothes or behavior are gendered, and I dont think a man suddenly becomes feminine by wearing women's clothes.


That's how things go. Colloquial terms are often subjective


----------



## Inkblooded (Jan 31, 2018)

Zehlua said:


> Gender means something different to everyone.
> For me, it's often how I feel and dress. Gender is a sincere performance and the expressions of my heart. It's a deeply personal experience that I share with others through thoughtfully picked out clothes. My fashion always reflects how I feel, and there are NO exceptions to this rule.
> You can have a big hairy man in a tutu, and he can be grumpy and awkward about it. Or he can be really into that form of expression, and it will probably allow him to act more feminine (gentler, nurturing, soft-voiced, as opposed to assertive, independent, and more outspoken.)
> There are traits that we as a society put into camps of Male and Female. As a genderfluid person, I enjoy grabbing whatever traits I like and running with them. I dress as I please, act as I please, and it registers as eclectic.
> ...




The thing is that gender stereotypes are a bad thing. Maybe not everyone sees it that way. But assigning gender to certain things is dumb, old fashioned, and sexist.

So... when I describe myself as a "feminine boy" I only mean physically. Nothing i wear or no way I act is feminine, because those things are inherently gender neutral.


----------



## Yvvki (Jan 31, 2018)

You are not a fem boy, I think people might *want* you to be one because of how you look but...yea no.

I think the people who are trying to label you into being one are only pressing their own desires onto you. Which is not healthy at all.

You are you, there does not need to be a label.

If you are self conscious about your body where you are at the point of even considering others wishes onto yourself, then you need to know that;

1 ) You are subconsciously allowing this behavior from others.

2 ) You need to be more firm to others and to yourself on who you are.

3 ) There are always going to be people out there that will have an idea about you before they even meet you/talk to you. It is up to you to derail their beliefs in a quick- yet gentle fashion.


----------



## Zehlua (Jan 31, 2018)

Inkblooded said:


> The thing is that gender stereotypes are a bad thing. Maybe not everyone sees it that way. But assigning gender to certain things is dumb, old fashioned, and sexist.
> 
> So... when I describe myself as a "feminine boy" I only mean physically. Nothing i wear or no way I act is feminine, because those things are inherently gender neutral.



It IS dumb, old-fashioned, and sexist... but it exists! It's very ingrained in our culture, so the best way to subvert it is to play with it and exploit it


----------



## Val_Redwolf (Jan 31, 2018)

When it comes to femboys...

1. No I don't think its gay in its entirety, but for a good number of people who might be femboys I could see it as a high potential (in my opinion).
2. No they don't have to be sexual in nature, its just the vast majority are depicted that way.
3. Hmm I would have to just say its a male individual that has physical traits "typical" to a more female body or acts more "feminine" then "typical" masculine individuals in behavior.
4. I can say that in a relationship no one has to be anything. femboys (or anyone) can be top or bottom. People might actually find it more attractive if a femboy was more on the assertive side.

I don't care what people do or how they act as long as they aren't hurting anyone... *shrug*


----------



## WolfoxeCrevan (Feb 1, 2018)

To me, it’s a guy who feels more feminine. They don’t have to dress girly or talk girly or look girly or anything, they just feel more feminine.
And NO we don’t have to be submissive. I’m sure even most GIRLS can be much more dominating than even tough guys.
Aaand lastly, nope. Not a purely sexual thing. So we good XD


----------

