# How Can I Tell My Parents I Want To Go To AC?



## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 29, 2013)

Thanks to anyone who will stick to this and read it :3 

Ok, so i want to tell my mum I'm a furry because I want to attend anthrocon next year may be the year after and I live in the UK so I will have to save up around Â£1500 because flights to and from Pittsburgh are very expensive. However, no matter how much well i explain it to her as being a hobby know she will naturally tell my sister and she will look it up on the internet (as my mum isn't good at explaining things) and she is bound to find yiff and other material on there such as people spreading lies about the fandom. In which case I don't know how they will react. For example, my sister may end up telling my mum the fandom and convention is full of creeps that scritch, **** and jerk off to animal p0rn 24/7 in which case my mum wont let me go.

I know travelling to Canada at my age (16 [17/18 at the time i want to go]) is a big thing anyway but I don't want to have my mum walking around the con with me because its expensive (we are a poor family) and she just wouldn't get it in which case she wouldn't be happy. I know the option to go when I've moved out is an option but that's just too long of a wait. Due to a lack of money i wont be able to move out for a good few years (20+) so I will have to tell her at some point. I've never been on holiday out of the country (except with school once to France) so I just want to get out of this crappy country and see the world. I've already told her i want to go to Canada but not told her about furries and anthrocon yet.

Unfortunately the option to go to a con closer to me Isn't available because i live far away from any other con (6 hour drive and my mum doesn't drive) and the other cons are in different countries. The only reason I want to go to anthrocon so bad is because I don't know of any other furries that live near me (I have 4 furry friends that live in Canada) and honestly I just want to go and meet new people with similar interests and make new friends. Instead of going to some cons closer too me; because of the lack of money i may as well save up for a full blown holiday to Canada than go somewhere closer because even if i do go to somewhere closer I wont be able to go anywhere for the following few years. So i may as well have one big blow out and go to the biggest con and have the opportunity to get the full experience and hopefully make a lot of new friends. Don't get me wrong I am not saying i wont get the full experience at any other con but I will be able to meet most of my friends at AC instead of any other con. Any suggestions? 
Is there any way to tell her indirectly that I want am going to a con for anthros/furries. Any suggestions will be extremely appreciated.


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## Falaffel (Jun 29, 2013)

You ask them?


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## Kalmor (Jun 29, 2013)

Just ask? Though you're better off waiting until you're a legal adult.

Also - http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...OU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!

Anthrocon's website has a great page that explains furry - http://www.anthrocon.org/about-furry

Though honestly. The fandom isn't a big deal and you're over-thinking this "telling your parents" thing.


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 29, 2013)

Raptros said:


> Just ask? Though you're better off waiting until you're a legal adult.
> 
> Also - http://forums.furaffinity.net/threa...OU-DON-T-HAVE-TO-quot-COME-OUT-quot-AS-FURRY!
> 
> ...



I get what you mean and I was expecting this answer, however, can I suggest going to google and typing furry into google images and telling me what you would think someone who doesn't know about the furry fandom would think? this is all i mean, there is so much material on the internet that my family wouldn't approve of its would be a little hard for them not to assume things.


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## Kalmor (Jun 29, 2013)

MoofyBlazeScott said:


> I get what you mean and I was expecting this answer, however, can I suggest going to google and typing furry into google images and telling me what you would think someone who doesn't know about the furry fandom would think? this is all i mean, there is so much material on the internet that my family wouldn't approve of its would be a little hard for them not to assume things.


You beat them to it, you explain first. Explain what a furry is rather than what we are not. If they stumble upon that kind of material then meh. You've done your bit.

Furry is not a big deal and never has been.


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## Troj (Jun 29, 2013)

You want to go to THIS year's AC? Talk about the 11th Hour! (edit: OP said next year. Oops.)

Here's how I'd tend to go about it:

Step one: Introduce my mother to my interest in cartoons and anthropomorphic animals, by showing her some of the characters and media I enjoy, and talking about why I like it.

Step two: Introduce my mother to my best and favorite furry friends and acquaintances in a neutral, comfortable context. Later, talk about why I like and trust these people.

Step three: Create a travel itinerary and budget for a hypothetical trip to a con, making sure to troubleshoot high costs, travel obstacles, and lodging. This step may involve getting in touch with potential lodging and/or carpooling partners.

Step four: Express my interest in attending a con.

Step five: Present my itinerary and budget to my mother.

Step SIX: Invite my mother to share her thoughts, ideas, and concerns, and respond to them calmly and maturely. Work with her to reach an agreement on the issue, and forge a plan we're both OK with.


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 29, 2013)

Troj said:


> You want to go to THIS year's AC? Talk about the 11th Hour!
> 
> Here's how I'd tend to go about it:
> 
> ...



Thanks for the answer, probably the best help I have received yet. No I do not want to attend this years anthrocon, maybe in one or two years time. The only reason I haven't posted anything yet is because I'm tired or having to stop talking about furries, drawing or watching videos ecs when she is in the room, not too sure why I do, but that's just the way it is. No speech or rant can change the way I think about this because trust me people have tried, most of them are telling me the same thing. Thanks a lot


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## Falaffel (Jun 29, 2013)

MoofyBlazeScott said:


> Thanks for the answer, probably the best help I have received yet. No I do not want to attend this years anthrocon, maybe in one or two years time. The only reason I haven't posted anything yet is because I'm tired or having to stop talking about furries, drawing or watching videos ecs when she is in the room, not too sure why I do, but that's just the way it is. No speech or rant can change the way I think about this because trust me people have tried, most of them are telling me the same thing. Thanks a lot


Well then whats the point of doing something if you think something you enjoy will cause so many problems?


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 29, 2013)

Falaffel said:


> Well then whats the point of doing something if you think something you enjoy will cause so many problems?



Thanks for the reply. The thing is, it shouldn't cause problems if I tell them in the right way, because the tread it about how to tell them not how to deal with the problems that may occur. I don't want to make a big deal about it because its not a big deal I just don't know how to tell them without getting the wrong idea because of all the crap that is on the internet.


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## Falaffel (Jun 29, 2013)

MoofyBlazeScott said:


> Thanks for the reply. The thing is, it shouldn't cause problems if I tell them in the right way, because the tread it about how to tell them not how to deal with the problems that may occur. I don't want to make a big deal about it because its not a big deal I just don't know how to tell them without getting the wrong idea because of all the crap that is on the internet.



Oh I get it... I was the same way some time ago.


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## LegitWaterfall (Jun 29, 2013)

You ask for permission to go to a convention and tell them about it and how you participate?
For sake of sake you don't need a flippin' tutor to tell you how to come out about it.


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## Inciatus (Jun 29, 2013)

Troj said:
			
		

> Step one: Introduce my mother to my interest in cartoons and anthropomorphic animals, by showing her some of the characters and media I enjoy, and talking about why I like it.
> 
> Step two: Introduce my mother to my best and favorite furry friends and acquaintances in a neutral, comfortable context. Later, talk about why I like and trust these people.
> 
> ...



Step Six: ???

You probably should have started this sooner, and if you are poor maybe you shouldn't be looking at dropping a couple grand on this. Maybe go to a convention in the UK?


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## Ansitru (Jun 29, 2013)

I would just say you're going to a convention, without emphasising it's a furry one. 
Not that you should lie, but just ... something like "_I'm going to (this convention), it's (there), held (then) and I would need to do (this this and this) to get there. I would love to go because I can meet awesome people and artists there_"?


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 29, 2013)

Inciatus said:


> Step Six: ???
> 
> You probably should have started this sooner, and if you are poor maybe you shouldn't be looking at dropping a couple grand on this. Maybe go to a convention in the UK?[/COLOR]



Unfortunately there is only two conventions in the uk. I live in the north west of England. One furry convention is on the other side of Scotland and the other one is around a 2 hour drive away (confuzzled). Confuzzled is a viable opportunity however confuzzled is actually a mediaeval fayre for furries and I've had a look over the activities scheduled and its just not what I'm looking for (e.g. the whole event is based around mediaeval living and the only real activity there is their dealers den and charity auction). So confuzzled is more of a themed charity event for raising money. Sadly the only other furry involved things in the UK are mini meets which only involve one or two suitors and around 6 other people meeting up at a park and walking around the city for a few hours. So my next option is eurofurence and unfortunately for me, that is held in Germany and the minimum age limit for attending is 18 years old. So I'm in a little bit of a dilemma.


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 29, 2013)

LegitWaterfall said:


> You ask for permission to go to a convention and tell them about it and how you participate?
> For sake of sake you don't need a flippin' tutor to tell you how to come out about it.



Thanks for the answer, I was expecting more of an answer that provided me with maybe someone who had the same problem and how they overcome it. May i ask why you posted this here because you didn't exactly answer my question in the nicest possible way. I know you see a lot of it so it must be a big issue. Replying with something a little aggressive is only going to make people unhappy and overall get yourself worked up. Instead of posting something that wont help, skip the post. Thanks anyway, have a nice day.


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## LegitWaterfall (Jun 29, 2013)

MoofyBlazeScott said:


> Thanks for the answer, I was expecting more of an answer that provided me with maybe someone who had the same problem and how they overcome it. May i ask why you posted this here because you didn't exactly answer my question in the nicest possible way. I know you see a lot of it so it must be a big issue. Replying with something a little aggressive is only going to make people unhappy and overall get yourself worked up. Instead of posting something that wont help, skip the post. Thanks anyway, have a nice day.


Sorry, helping isn't something I'm good at :V


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## Falaffel (Jun 29, 2013)

LegitWaterfall said:


> Sorry, helping isn't something I'm good at :V



Your sig helped me remember the rules to rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock.


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## LegitWaterfall (Jun 29, 2013)

Falaffel said:


> Your sig helped me remember the rules to rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock.


Truth.


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## Kalmor (Jun 29, 2013)

Falaffel said:


> Your sig helped me remember the rules to rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock.


Only me and the other ultra nerds in my school know that variation.

T'is fun.


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## Inciatus (Jun 29, 2013)

I would reply with a quote but it isn't working so this will have to do.

Then wait a few years. At your age you will have a tough time of renting and getting hotel rooms in the USA.


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## DarrylWolf (Jun 30, 2013)

"Mom, Dad, have I ever told you that I am just crazy for the Pittsburgh Steelers? Can we go see Three Rivers Stadium and eat at Primanti's over the Fourth of July weekend, please?"

That will work, assuming your parents aren't bright enough to realize that nobody except for Furries has ever wanted to vacation IN Pittsburgh.


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## Toshabi (Jun 30, 2013)

MoofyBlazeScott said:


> I want to attend anthrocon next year may be the year after and I live in the UK so I will have to save up around Â£1500 because flights to and from Pittsburgh are very expensive.




Key phrase. 




MoofyBlazeScott said:


> However, no matter how much well i explain it to her as being a hobby know she will naturally tell my sister and she will look it up on the internet (as my mum isn't good at explaining things) and she is bound to find yiff and other material on there such as people spreading lies about the fandom. In which case I don't know how they will react. For example, my sister may end up telling my mum the fandom and convention is full of creeps that scritch, **** and jerk off to animal p0rn 24/7 in which case my mum wont let me go.





And that's really not too far from the truth, actually. (nsfw)




MoofyBlazeScott said:


> I know travelling to Canada at my age (16 [17/18 at the time i want to go]) is a big thing anyway but I don't want to have my mum walking around the con with me because its expensive *(we are a poor family)*







MoofyBlazeScott said:


> I want to attend anthrocon next year may be the year after and I live in the UK* so I will have to save up around Â£1500* because flights to and from Pittsburgh are very expensive.









MoofyBlazeScott said:


> _*Due to a lack of money i wont be able to move out for a good few years (20+)*_ so I will have to tell her at some point. I've never been on holiday out of the country (except with school once to France) so I just want to get out of this crappy country and see the world._* I've already told her i want to go to Canada but not told her about furries and anthrocon yet.*_







MoofyBlazeScott said:


> I want to attend anthrocon next year may be the year after and I live in the UK* so I will have to save up around Â£1500* because flights to and from Pittsburgh are very expensive.





#Priorities 




MoofyBlazeScott said:


> Unfortunately the option to go to a con closer to me Isn't available because i live far away from any other con (6 hour drive and my mum doesn't drive) and the other cons are in different countries.




SO let's just go to the one that's even farther away and will cost you more money! 










MoofyBlazeScott said:


> Instead of going to some cons closer too me; because of the lack of money i may as well save up for a full blown holiday to Canada than go somewhere closer because even if i do go to somewhere closer I wont be able to go anywhere for the following few years. So i may as well have one big blow out and go to the biggest con and have the opportunity to get the full experience and hopefully make a lot of new friends. Don't get me wrong I am not saying i wont get the full experience at any other con but I will be able to meet most of my friends at AC instead of any other con. Any suggestions?
> Is there any way to tell her indirectly that I want am going to a con for anthros/furries. Any suggestions will be extremely appreciated.





I don't have money to go to a local con, so let's just spend MORE MONEY to go to a farther away con. Because that's the smartest thing to do!




Good fucking god, furries are so retarded.


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## Troj (Jun 30, 2013)

Inciatus said:


> Step Six: ???
> [/COLOR]



Steal underpants.


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## Blackberry Polecat (Jun 30, 2013)

Moofy, just go to Confuzzled! AC is too big for a first con and will cost you waaaay too much money to get to.

Confuzzled has theme every year, yes, but there are so many scheduled events that it isn't hard to have fun without going to a themed one. And lots of people have hours of fun just hanging around outside or in the bar area playing video games or suiting etc.

If you do decide to go to Confuzzled next year, I'm more than happy to meet up with you there. c:


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## Taralack (Jun 30, 2013)

Why don't you go to a local con first? Maybe if you make some local friends you can organize an overseas trip and save more money.


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 30, 2013)

Toshabi said:


> I don't have money to go to a local con, so let's just spend MORE MONEY to go to a farther away con. Because that's the smartest thing to do!



I don't even think you took the time to read any of my replies, I already answered this so before calling me a retard TAKE A LOOK AT MY POSTS!

The reason I said I want to go to AC even though money is tight instead of going to any other con closer to me is because they are ether over 18s, themed to the point where I wouldn't have fun and finally if i do spend any money on a holiday because money is so tight it would be the only holiday i would have in a for those following few years. No matter how much i spend, so instead of going somewhere that I wouldn't fully enjoy, why not save up a little extra and go to somewhere I will remember forever.

I'm not like normal kids, I would hate to go to turkey or Spain and sunbathe, I would hate to go to Malia or Ibiza and party until i get alcohol poisoning. I would rather go somewhere where I can meet new friends that I can remain in contact with and share common interests with. If that means I have to save up  a little more and wait a little longer then so be it, I've been patient all my life, and i don't think that's about to change. For me this would be my one big holiday every few years.

Please take into consideration other facts when posting because i know most of the time things seem dumb but situations are different from person to person so there may be a good reason they are asking the question they are asking, so answer it if you can and don't if you can't.


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## Teal (Jun 30, 2013)

How old are you now? Have you ever been to any type of convention? (anime/sci-fi/comic/etc.)


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 30, 2013)

Teal said:


> How old are you now? Have you ever been to any type of convention? (anime/sci-fi/comic/etc.)



16, I've been to a few gaming conventions (insomnia) although technically that is a gaming festival.


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## Teal (Jun 30, 2013)

MoofyBlazeScott said:


> 16, I've been to a few gaming conventions (insomnia) although technically that is a gaming festival.


 Personally I think you should wait two years and go to one of the cheaper cons.  And just to let you know, your age could pose a lot of problems for you if you still want to do all that traveling to get to AC.


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## MoofyBlazeScott (Jun 30, 2013)

Teal said:


> Personally I think you should wait two years and go to one of the cheaper cons.  And just to let you know, your age could pose a lot of problems for you if you still want to do all that traveling to get to AC.



Thanks for the advice. It looks like this will be the case, sucks that when your young two years seems like a lot longer than it really is. :')


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## Taralack (Jun 30, 2013)

To add on to what Teal said, fyi they consider you an adult at 21 in America for a lot of things.


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## Harbinger (Jun 30, 2013)

Are you saying you have Â£1500 now at 16 or you will have that by the time you 18?
Was gonna say i did something sereiously wrong in my childhood if so.

Like everyones saying wait till your older it would be easier. And dont tell them you're a furry exactly for the reasons you said. They will browse and read up shit like that and get their minds set in stone their own deluded opinion. Im not bothering to tell people that, its just an interesting or hobby at the end of the day, having people know is just an annoyance.


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## DerpyTurtle (Jun 30, 2013)

My dad knows I'm a big furry and supports me making furry crap for a business but I'm still gonna have to wait until I move out to go to cons just because I know he's not gonna want to deal with it and drive me there and everything. If it's such a big deal to ask them about it and try to go then you can probably wait until you're older too. I'll be a senior this year. It's really not "too long of a wait."


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## Troj (Jun 30, 2013)

You could also consider going to a non-furry geek con, since furries also attend those, and they sometimes make plans to meet each other.


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## Teal (Jun 30, 2013)

Hey OP are there any Fur meets in your area?


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## Pons Sandcat (Jul 2, 2013)

Regarding telling your mom about Anthrocon...

Last year was my first year going to AC, and I just went up to my parents and said "hey, do you guys mind if I go down to Pittsburgh and visit my friends? I want to go on these dates specifically because there's a convention we want to go to". They inquired about it, and I described it as being similar to comic con (which they only know about because we watch Big Bang Theory, lul). People dress up in costumes and there are vendors/dealers, panels, etc. Except the theme is animals/anthropomorphic animals. The people there are artists, crafters, dancers, performers, etc. 

I've never used the word "furry" or "fursuit" when talking to my parents. Not that I'm hiding anything. But this way I have a chance to describe it to them without using ~buzz words that they can then look up.


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## Troj (Jul 2, 2013)

Pons Sandcat wins the thread. Comparing furry cons with ComicCon is a nice, simple way to paint a picture for even non-geeks, in a way that typically won't be seen as weird, suspicious, or threatening.


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## Harbinger (Jul 2, 2013)

Pons Sandcat said:


> Regarding telling your mom about Anthrocon...
> 
> Last year was my first year going to AC, and I just went up to my parents and said "hey, do you guys mind if I go down to Pittsburgh and visit my friends? I want to go on these dates specifically because there's a convention we want to go to". They inquired about it, and I described it as being similar to comic con (which they only know about because we watch Big Bang Theory, lul). People dress up in costumes and there are vendors/dealers, panels, etc. Except the theme is animals/anthropomorphic animals. The people there are artists, crafters, dancers, performers, etc.
> 
> I've never used the word "furry" or "fursuit" when talking to my parents. Not that I'm hiding anything. But this way I have a chance to describe it to them without using ~buzz words that they can then look up.



Dayum, that actually sonded normal...


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## Riho (Jul 2, 2013)

The way I explained furries to my mom, is I took out _Robin Hood_, from Disney. I paused it on a clear shot of Robin, that foxy, foxy, man, and I explained to her the following: This is an anthropomorphic creature, a cartoon. I find myself to be interested in this, and have created my own "cartoon animal", complete with backstory and appearance details. It's a hyena, in case you were wondering. But I'm not the only one. A rather big chunk of the population throughout the world is interested in the exact same thing. In fact, this entire following has become so popular, that conventions are held for mass groups to converge and meet. (Such as Anthrocon.) Now, unfortunately, a chunk of this "furry fandom" is rather sexual, but I feel uncomfortable around it, as well as the people who obsess over it. I merely find myself gravitating toward the social side, meeting other socially awkward people and slowly connecting to them.

And then I stepped on my cat's tail, I recommend you not do that.


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## CaptainCool (Jul 3, 2013)

You should wait with going to AC. That is a massive trip and very expensive. It needs more planning then "how do I tell my parents?".
Go to CF instead. Less planing, less expensive, just as much fun.
Alternatively you could aim for Eurofurence! That is the biggest con in Europe, many people from the US go there and flying from the UK to Germany and back is dirt cheap compared to flying from Europe to the US. It would cost you less than 100 bucks depending on where you book your flight. So the entire trip could cost you just a couple hundred bucks compared to those 1500 pounds!


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## un-registered (Jul 3, 2013)

My opinion on this whole thread...

LOTS of great advice has already been given. I just recently found out that I've been furry all my life. I just didn't realize it until a fellow furry told me what the furry fandom is all about and I'm like OMG, that's SOO mee! Anyway, it's been an overload. Since I don't fancy the drama of Facebook or Twitter (or any other social network), my spare time has been consumed by these forums and the other site. I want to go to the HUGE con in either Atlanta, Georgia, or the one that's closer to me in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I was reading an article saying that this years gathering of furries will be entered into the Guinness Book of World Records. Personally, I don't think I'd like to be around 5500 fursuiters my first time around. So I'm going to the smaller, more local Fur Fright con in Connecticut (I live in Massachusetts). My mom knows that I'm going to a big "artsy-fartsy" convention with lots of "mascots" and it's being held to appreciate the art work of designing them, putting them down on paper, putting them up in digital format, and then putting together with lots of mods and what not, then having them all gather in one place so that people can appreciate everything... Plus, it's to benefit a non-profit org for war dogs... or something. Granted... I'm an adult and I tried to come out of the closet (she shoved me back in lol). I'm going with two non-furry friends who live around the corner from me. They only know as much as I'm telling them about the furry fandom. They've googled it and found all of the yiffers and murrsuiters, then I showed them the correct sites (like this one) that those people only make up around 15% (at best), the rest of us are interested in the furry fandom for other reasons lol.

FINALLY - THE POINT I'M TRYING TO MAKE

*#1: Do something local, even if you "assume" you won't like it.* I hate Halloween, but I'm going with a non-bias mind set.
*#2: If you "need" to tell you mom, you don't have to lie. But you don't have to tell 100% of the truth either.* Tell her about the "artsy-fartsy" stuff, and leave out the yiffers and murrsuiters.
*#3: Take a friend who you know and trust and who loves you back, regardless of who or what you are.* My two friends "used" to hate furries because of one bad experience with some drama queens on the paintball field. But because they love me, they're willing to be open minded for "my" sake.
*#4: Money is VERY important. My way of thinking may be a little extreme, but I like the way it works.* Take in consideration EVERY possible angle, over estimate the cost of it all, then save DOUBLE that amount. For me; con fee to get in, fuel cost to get there, hotel, food, shopping, all for three people will cost about $750(USD). I'm saving up $1500(USD). Even though they're covering their share, I'm preparing to cover their end anyway, just in case they come up with something between now and then that requires them to spend everything they've saved up.
*#5: Probably the most important of the above four combined... REMEMBER THE "SIX-TWO-ONE" RULE!!!* That's six hours of sleep every night, two full meals every day, and weather you're a fursuiter or not, you need at least one shower daily to get rid of the sweat (if you're in fursuit) and/or to rid your self of germs or colds that people may be carrying with them while at the con. After watching every YouTube panel on the net, I'll also be eating a fresh orange every morning for the Vitamin-C that helps prevent "con-crud" (lol - i love the terms people come up with)!

_Just keep in mind that I'm pretty new to all this. Don't take my word for it, do your own research. You may find some other facts that can be useful to me as well, and I'd be thrilled if you shared them with all of us._

*I wish you all the best!!!
((((((((((HUGS))))))))))*


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