# WTF is wrong with you, Florida? Is it the heat or the stupidity???



## Tango (Jan 25, 2013)

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/...3967.html?utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false


Between this and the Bath Salts Face-eater I'm glad i moved up to Maine.


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## dinosaurdammit (Jan 25, 2013)

welp we know where the zombie outbreak starts, start digging a canal to separate Florida- QUICK


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## Percy (Jan 25, 2013)

I read the recap. What in the fucking fuck I don't even.


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## Cairn (Jan 25, 2013)

How does one "drink the contents of a vacuum"?


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## Fallowfox (Jan 25, 2013)

He's lucky he didn't get shot. Weird.


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## Tango (Jan 25, 2013)

Fallowfox said:


> He's lucky he didn't get shot. Weird.



He got shot at. If it were DD he would have been too dead to poop on the floor.


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## Hinalle K. (Jan 25, 2013)

There's an article I didn't want to read while eating.

Fuck.


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## Llamapotamus (Jan 25, 2013)

That guy knows how to party...


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## badlands (Jan 25, 2013)

Cairn said:


> How does one "drink the contents of a vacuum"?



with great difficulty.

and also, what the bollocking hell?


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## Sutekh_the_Destroyer (Jan 25, 2013)

It's the heat _and_â€‹ stupidity: the heat partially melts the brain of the Floridian, thus creating the stupidity.  :V


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## RadioactiveRedFox (Jan 25, 2013)

Wow, I wonder what the hell this guy was on.


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## Suezotiger (Jan 25, 2013)

dinosaurdammit said:


> welp we know where the zombie outbreak starts, start digging a canal to separate Florida- QUICK



Better get Disney World out of there first. Gotta have something to take our mind off the zombie apocalypse.


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## Batty Krueger (Jan 25, 2013)

Wow, finally I hear about other people that share my last name and this happens to them.  
Da fuq mang?


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## Sarcastic Coffeecup (Jan 25, 2013)

Well, That is something I never wish to experience.


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## Kit H. Ruppell (Jan 25, 2013)

Fallowfox said:


> He's lucky he didn't get shot. Weird.


The community, not so lucky.


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## Rilvor (Jan 25, 2013)

Thankfully I have learned to look at the entire link before I click on it, and thus from its keywords I have spared myself.


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## sunshyne (Jan 25, 2013)

If you think people in Florida are fuckin' nuts, you should check out California sometime...


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## Smelge (Jan 25, 2013)

Wait, so dodging bullets shot at you is now a crime?


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## Ranguvar (Jan 25, 2013)

Smelge said:


> Wait, so dodging bullets shot at you is now a crime?


Yep. You are supposed to take the bullets like a man.


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## Namba (Jan 25, 2013)

Tango, are you on a mission to cover all fifty states?


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## Machine (Jan 25, 2013)

Maybe he got high from vacuum dust and was looking for another fix.


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## Dragonfurry (Jan 25, 2013)

Eyal Flurry said:


> Tango, are you on a mission to cover all fifty states?



oh oh! DO Missouri next, then all the states! Oh dont forget the US territories too :V


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## Namba (Jan 25, 2013)

Dude, do Alabama. That should be super easy.


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## Symlus (Jan 25, 2013)

Welp. From the crocs to the dicks, I've had my share of Florida while staying safe in my home here, in cali.


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## BouncyOtter (Jan 25, 2013)

So, he dodged bullets, THEN masturbated in the living room.  Did the lady run of ammo? Did she stop to watch or let him finish?  Either way, the whole thing is insane.


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## Namba (Jan 25, 2013)

BouncyOtter said:


> So, he dodged bullets, THEN masturbated in the living room.


Don't forget the part where he took a giant shit on the floor.

...twice.


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## Kit H. Ruppell (Jan 25, 2013)

Carnival worker = circus freak? That's where they all went!


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## DarrylWolf (Jan 25, 2013)

Typical Florida moron.


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## Kit H. Ruppell (Jan 25, 2013)

DarrylWolf said:


> Typical Florida moron.


Florida would be a nice place if it had been designated as a massive nature preserve.


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## Golden (Jan 26, 2013)

How the fuck did he manage to do all that at once?


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## ShÃ nwÃ ng (Jan 26, 2013)

Hella night on jenkem yo.

It's probably karma. That old couple could have been huge racists back in the day.

What's up with grandma missing the guy so many times? He had time to masturbate in their living room, she could've capped at least one ass check for sure.


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## RadioactiveRedFox (Jan 26, 2013)

ShÃ nwÃ ng said:


> What's up with grandma missing the guy so many times?



My guess is she didn't want to hit him, or like many people, she don't have a clue how to handle a gun.


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## ShÃ nwÃ ng (Jan 26, 2013)

RadioactiveRedFox said:


> My guess is she didn't want to hit him, or like many people, she don't have a clue how to handle a gun.



My guess is the latter. I'm pretty sure Florida's stand your ground law was written so you could gun down a perceived threat without guilt.


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## Fallowfox (Jan 27, 2013)

Lev1athan said:


> Welp. From the crocs to the dicks, I've had my share of Florida while staying safe in my home here, in cali.



I swear it's gators.


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## Inciatus (Jan 27, 2013)

RadioactiveRedFox said:


> My guess is she didn't want to hit him, or like many people, she don't have a clue how to handle a gun.



More likely the latter. Florida's stand your ground law would say she may fire upon him. She must have been a very bad shot or she just wanted to scare him off. Though if you draw a gun you should be prepared to kill the person and Florida culture would say  for two to the chest and one to the head.


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## RadioactiveRedFox (Jan 27, 2013)

Inciatus said:


> More likely the latter. Florida's stand your ground law would say she may fire upon him. She must have been a very bad shot or she just wanted to scare him off. Though if you draw a gun you should be prepared to kill the person and Florida culture would say  for two to the chest and one to the head.



Ya, I'm leaning towards the latter my self.



Fallowfox said:


> I swear it's gators.



...And the boas.


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## Kio Snowfyre (Jan 27, 2013)

Reading the  recap, I got to "drank the contents of the vacuum" and ended up in stitches. Possibly the funniest news I've heard in years.


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