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I no longer wish to live....
17 years ago
Marmelmm....as a thinking, individual person that is.
Maybe I should go get drunk or high for the first time. All I know is I want to hurry up and leave so I can slave for the government for the next 20 years of my life to atone for what I've done, then....go die or something :P
Maybe I should go get drunk or high for the first time. All I know is I want to hurry up and leave so I can slave for the government for the next 20 years of my life to atone for what I've done, then....go die or something :P
What's going on? Why do you feel so glum, chum?
~Otaku-Man
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/490389/
I know you've already apologized to Yuuri on her page, but that's probably what made her mad the most.
You felt uncomfortable and a bit jealous over her friend of 8 years, mostly because he's a guy. That's understandable since I've had that feeling too concerning my wife and an ex of hers who is still a good friend.
HOWEVER, the BIG mistake that you made, unfortunately, was in airing these feelings out on a big community site: FA!
This is like airing dirty laundry out to dry, showing something that you REALLY don't want to show someone else.
Likewise, this did NOT make Yuuri a happy camper in the LEAST! No doubt she's pretty mad about this. My instinct tells me she is NOT truly mad about the fact that you felt the way you do/did, but more about the fact that you made it PUBLIC!
What you SHOULD have done was PM/E-mail her a very heartfelt letter about your feelings. Better yet, you should have sat down with her and talked about it face to face. It may not be the EASIEST of subjects to talk about, but even hard subjects need to be talked about at some point.
After that, she would likely have appreciated you more for being open and honest with your feelings, and you two could have worked out a resolution, giving you piece of mind and bridging your relationship closer.
Unfortunately, getting to that talk is going to be REALLY hard now.
REALLY hard.
But there IS a silver lining. As Yuuri explained in her journal, she DOES LOVE YOU!
To be blunt:
"SHE LOVES YOU, STUPID!"
And here's the thing, she loves you EVEN when she's mad at you. That is TRUE LOVE!
True love is NOT not having to say you're sorry, but being forgiven when you DO say you're sorry. True Love means loving someone and being mad at them at the same time.
There have been many, MANY times when my wife has been mad at me. Whether it be for something stupid, such as forgetting to take the trash out or cleaning something up, or for something more serious, like revealing something private in an open forum.
Yes, I AM guilty of doing the same thing you did, more or less. It may not have been online in a blog post, but at least it was like at the dinner table with family or friends.
And yes, she WILL get mad!
And it is O-KAY!
You KNOW it is okay, because she said it herself that she LOVES you in her journal, even WHILE she is still mad at you!
That takes GUTS and COURAGE on an IMMENSE scale on her part. She is DEFENDING you while PISSED AT YOU!
A woman like that is rare, as I have seen people get into tears over lesser stuff than this. For her to have the stamina and guts to do that means she is a Venus de Milo before you. A woman of beauty and stature the likes that make history.
If I were you, I would:
1) Apologize PROFUSELY! And NOT online! In a PM, an e-mail, face to face, ANYTHING where your words are not out in the open. And don't just write "I'm sorry" on the blackboard a hundred times. You need to let Yuuri know that you UNDERSTAND your mistake, you understand WHY she is pissed, and understand that you're going to be in the doghouse for a while.
2) If she asks, DO IT! If she wants you over to dinner, you GO! Unless someone else, like a parental unit, insists that you stay behind for something else, you GO! If she asks you out, you GO! If she wants to talk, you TALK! If she wants to just snuggle for a bit, you SNUGGLE!
Now is NOT the time to be selfish for ANYTHING! Use your best manners and behavior!
3) Turn on the romance. A little gift, a nice dinner, going out on a date to see a movie or something, ANYTHING! You don't have to go overboard. It's better to spend $100 on a bunch of smaller gifts than one BIG gift. Doing this will help show her that you can be caring and mature.
Now I may be sounding like a Dr. Phil here (I picture him as a walrus or otter with that mustache of his), but the fact of the matter is that I'm talking from EXPERIENCE!
I HAVE screwed up!
I HAVE done dumb stupid things that make me want to crawl into a hole and die.
My wife HAS gotten mad at me.
And after 6, going on 7 years this Dec. 30th, we are married and still together.
There is NO REASON why you can't have this kind of happiness too! You just got to pull your head out of your butt so you aren't so dang stubborn, learn from your mistakes, and move on.
If you DWELL over this, you're just going to make everyone miserable. INCLUDING yourself.
Further more, with you heading out to serve your country in a month, now is NOT the time to do stupid crap like this.
KISS AND MAKE UP NOW! That way, when you've served your time and come back, you'll have a lovely, mature, FANTASTIC woman waiting for you when you return.
Do NOT screw that up!
Now pull yourself together, calm down, realize the world isn't ending, and get to kissing up and making up at the same time!
~Otaku-Man
That's the best answer I've seen.
~Otaku-Man
one thing that as a person, most people cannot do is see themselves from another person's point of view, if you have an ideal of what you are like, then it must me absolutely insane for some else to say you act other wise.
i do it all the time, but i have acknowledged it tho. i warn people..
'sometimes it seems as if i have an aditude when i don't really mean it, it is just the way i talk'
i have been doing it for years, since i was very young, and it has always gotten me into trouble.
if she sits you down to talk to you, you MUST hear it with an open mind.
without thinking we take advantage of others, it is just how we are as humans. we want as much as we can get, from everything and everybody, some people change, while others demand that there is nothing wrong with them..
there is something wrong with EVERYBODY it is different from person to person, you have something wrong, but so does she, the difference is that she is willing to talk about it. (you should be happy for that, many people keep their feelings inside nowadays.)
again, sit down and listen. just shut your mouth and listen, don't interrupt. when she is done then think about it, then open your mouth to say what you need to say.
there is always two sides to each story, and it just seems like you both really need to sit down one night and just say EVERYTHING.
On her side, I'll make sure she's willing to listen. This only works if both you and she work at talking and understanding.
Keep your chin up.
~Otaku-Man
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/490389/
but don't die!
you need something to get this problems out of your mind for a bit.