Commissions are open (PayPal)
DM Me if you want one

I finally got the chance to get the FA+ thing.
And changed my name to MrSilverAlpha, which what I will be referred to for now on.

Guys, sorry if I didn't respond in messages in notes, not used to this system like I am in DeviantArt. So if you want a commission or something, add my Discord

I normally don't do this but, my discord with be some where in my PFP guys

Thank you

Discord
TheSilverAlpha #2355

Commissions will kind of open here, after I get through with the wave of the previous one so, keep in touch

I've been trying to feel happiness and fun...and this has been happening recently, about a few times..up and down now.

Looking at the things I've fucked up at..
My jealousy lead me to fuck myself and my friendship with Lukas up..cause me to stay away from him for a year...

Then I destroyed his spirit with that stupid rant I've made and then i deleted it later ...cause my fucking brain doesn't want to keep me sane, it wants me to die mentally...

and trying to draw stuff and I should be grateful...but I don't...I dont know why....something in my brain is telling me I should not be here


...like why am I here?


....what is the point of being here...


I don't belong here....and I'm afraid one day I'm just gonna just leave...no reason, just to know I did all I could ..but it doesn't satisfy me at the end of it all.....

Y'know, I've talking to people about my problems alot. Don't think it would matter to people cause they just get bored of it, including my friends.

I know they have to be tired of hearing me talk the same stuff that bothers me at random times, things that make me sad or depressed.

"You can always talk to us about it" ...please, I know you're sick of my shit at this point, so I'm not gonna say anything, just going to keep it in and pretend it doesn't exist, just pretend I'm a stranger to you all.

But that's ok..I'm fine with it

I have a lot to upload, I'm thinking should I just reupload all my new stuff or should I mix it up and put in the new refs then try to upload the old things, have things like stories and other shit I have on DA, about 2.8K Art things...it's a lot ^^;;

you try so hard...you get so far..but in the end it doesn't even matter.

there will always be another person that is one step above you that you never want to communicate, never want to say his name never want anything to do with it...and all you will feel is frustration, pain, and feeling like giving up...what I'm feeling right now

I hate being an artist... I wish I never became one, cause I never did progress it's always the same shit I'm dealing with..

Im sorry...I just not feeling good about myself at all... it has happened time and time again and I feel like it won't go away, but y'know who cares right?

Ever since i was taking a break from Discord..part of me dont want to go back there. Idk im still not sure about it. Right now im focused on my art and things

Please don't ask me to make NSFW 18+ things >_> I don't do that stuff, and don't agure or make a stupid excuse about it or trying to "expose" me. You will be blocked for that -_-

Anyways, just want to let you know and thank you ^^

It's hard to love and respect each other...when you found no love in the past....

I wish I can be like everyone...

livevoid cant even leave me or my friend alone for like one second...and now hes ruining the friendship of Zane with PK. I dont know what Void said to PK, but that is just fucked up, like can he not take the fucking hint.

So Void betrayed me with that damn RP with my best friend Max,

And after i gave him a second chance i really had my doubts cause i knew Void was going to do it again. Cause he cant take me blocking him after i was trying to stay away from him cause i dont even trust Void anymore.
And those who are trying to restore me and Voids friendship. You cant. Cause were SO DONE after what happened. Me and Voids friendship has been done ever since he fucked me over that one time.

I dont give a fuck what reason it is, its fucked up man.

And now Void is going to kill ZaneTheKnights and PKs friendship by telling PK some bullshit....

I just...I cant stand people.

But yknow what...

I dont care .... Void doesnt deserve to see my creations or art, and im gonna block him on Furrinity too. If he wants to cry, let him cry. Im done with it honestly, at this point im better off without Void. Say whatever you want i honestly dont care.

I just noticed that I hit 200 on here, I'm very very late...oh Whatever lol. But seriously thank you guys for checking me out and the support

Also I'm less than 40 away to reaching 2K on DA so, things are really working out ^^
Who knows maybe I might do something more for you guys, if I'm prepared for it

My head is just tired about this one user on DA.... ....the drama is really stressing me out...trying to find something to get me out of this depressive mood....I wasn't sad for a long time but so much for that...

Im having a feeling there is no justice or hope suddenly....I mean...the villains always win anyways, what's the point...? Tell me...what's the fucking point of fighting....

That's the thoughts in my head

Been losing hope on giving things to people after the incident on DA
https://www.deviantart.com/mrsilver.....uddy-951324505

https://www.deviantart.com/mrsilver.....onse-951273572

Been losing hope and feeling that there is only despair and we all living in eternal darkness..

It's like people don't want to support you, they just want to see you die... and then they go on with their lives and forget you ever existed.

I wish we can all just love and respect each other...but I guess that day is not coming.

Idk, this is just what I've been thinking..

Few days ago I changed my name on DA to MrSilverAlpha, which I wish I can do it on here, Furrinity won't let me change my name if I wanted to, maybe the feature won't be added for a long time idk. I'll still be uploading on here but the name will be different than my original, still known as MrSilverAlpha so yeah.

Just a heads up

I will be uploading te old and new art, even the art that is not fetish like from DA to here, along with uploading other new things, we'll just see how this goes ^^

Also I wish Furaffinity would have an app so i can check on you guys or my stats and stuff, if you guys know of anything like that let me know so i can check it out