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Accident
Posted 10 years agoDamn it, Had a bike accident, like i have before but this time...... Broken clavicle, huzzah.
New Skype Radio Station (IFR (InFURnal Records) Radio
Posted 10 years agoWe'll be on air at 5pm eastern standard time go to the link below and enter in the password
Link: skype:?chat&blob=kfD-fnCT91vJ8ZbmtMPFCcxWdN0DBczCy--HB7cikBb7F7WRZZTcV7oSyVjFtniTx0HQMXwu
Password: ilovemusic
Tonights set list: Rock
DJ: Mordi the Woxal
Link: skype:?chat&blob=kfD-fnCT91vJ8ZbmtMPFCcxWdN0DBczCy--HB7cikBb7F7WRZZTcV7oSyVjFtniTx0HQMXwu
Password: ilovemusic
Tonights set list: Rock
DJ: Mordi the Woxal
How to piss off a mainer (Mainah)
Posted 10 years agoSomeone, somewhere is going to be absolutely offended this article was written. Probably because they won’t personally relate to it, it’ll divulge actual information about “real” Maine, and/or it’ll fail to mention how great lighthouses and lobster rolls are.
Many people will even fail to read past the title. They’ll be totally insulted that someone would even dare to suggest on a public forum that a Mainer ever got pissed off.
Refuse to acknowledge the differences between Southern Maine and the entire rest of the state.
Southern Maine is home to our beloved city of Portland, located in beautiful Casco Bay. You can go sailing there. You can see a lighthouse. You can drive by all the gorgeous mansions of Kennebunkport and Falmouth. It’s a great place. Does it depict the majority of Maine culture? Not necessarily.
Drive just three hours northeast to Washington County, and you’ll still be on the ocean, you’ll still be in an exquisite place, but you’ll be in one of the poorest counties in America.
In 2010, a state representative even proposed a bill that would divide Maine into two states. He suggested that Northern and Central Maine be called “Maine” and Southern Maine be renamed “Northern Massachusetts.”
I don’t think that’s really necessary. But recognizing the obvious differences and taking the time to explore what our entire state has to offer means a great deal to us.
Tell us Portland isn’t a “real city.”
Just because Southern Maine is different doesn’t mean we’re not proud of it. There’s nothing that makes a flatlander sound more pretentious than telling us we don’t know what a real city is.
Portland is how Maine does a city. You can go and peruse a used-record store, get a $10 coffee, and eat a mediocre gyro from a street cart while still running into people you know everywhere, or, even better, running into people who know people you know. It’s a concentrated metropolitan paradise — what more do you need? More people urinating in public? Go to the Old Port.
Call us “hippies.”
Yes, many people moved here in the ’60s and ’70s. But most of them didn’t move here to fingerpaint, talk to a tree, and convulse to the Grateful Dead.
The back-to-the-land movement that’s still alive and well in Maine began primarily because of the inspirational experiences of pioneers like Helen and Scott Nearing. People came here because land was dirt cheap, and they wanted to learn how to work it, raise livestock, grow their own food, and separate from a society they didn’t relate to. Those people aren’t hippies. They’re hard workers.
Tell us to get rid of our junk.
Take any back road off Route 1A and you’ll see a charming assortment of mini junkyards in most backyards. Why would you get rid of your stove-up 1983 Volvo wagon when you might be able to put its motor into your other stove-up 1983 Volvo wagon?
Why would you get rid of the XR80 that’s been sitting under a tarp since you were 13? You might have a kid someday who wants to fracture her wrist on the Sunrise Trail because she’s riding a rusted-out XR80 that doesn’t even have a seat on it. You have to prepare for these things.
If there’s one thing every true Mainer knows, it’s that you can never have enough lawnmower engines.
Make us drive any distance over three miles.
If you want to witness a world-class example of a Maine tantrum (lots of throaty sighs and low growls) ask a person from Harrington to drive to Jonesport.
Many Mainers can almost completely self sustain on their land. When they have to leave it and run an errand that’s two towns away, it’s a hugely exasperating affair. We don’t get out much. And when we do, we can be a little pissed off about it.
Paradoxically, everything in Maine is ridiculously far away, and in many cases you really can’t get there from here. So, naturally, there are a lot of exasperated Mainers out there.
Tell us how to raise our children.
Maine kids are a breed all their own. At the Common Ground Fair, I once saw a 10-year-old get kicked in the chest by a mule. He walked it off.
Maine parents toughen up their babies from infancy. They don’t load them up with “kid coke” or bathe them in Purell. Maine kids aren’t gluten-free, sugar-free vegans with tree-nut allergies, and they certainly don’t have Twitter accounts.
When I was a kid, my mom would get a pile of dirt delivered to our backyard in a dump truck so we could all play in it. Seriously. A pile of dirt.
Be a lazy or dependent person.
Maine is a hardworking state. We’re a population of farmers, foresters, fishermen, hand laborers, and field workers.
If you try and tell us about how you didn’t work a job in high school, or about how your parents are still paying your rent, we’re not going to relate to you. And, honestly, we probably won’t be able to like you either.
Mainers relate to other hardworking Mainers. Sometimes it’s a little difficult for us to understand the lives and cultures of people “from away” because we automatically assume they don’t understand our lives and culture. But we really do try. All in all, Mainers are an accepting people. And we do want to get to know you.
Many people will even fail to read past the title. They’ll be totally insulted that someone would even dare to suggest on a public forum that a Mainer ever got pissed off.
Refuse to acknowledge the differences between Southern Maine and the entire rest of the state.
Southern Maine is home to our beloved city of Portland, located in beautiful Casco Bay. You can go sailing there. You can see a lighthouse. You can drive by all the gorgeous mansions of Kennebunkport and Falmouth. It’s a great place. Does it depict the majority of Maine culture? Not necessarily.
Drive just three hours northeast to Washington County, and you’ll still be on the ocean, you’ll still be in an exquisite place, but you’ll be in one of the poorest counties in America.
In 2010, a state representative even proposed a bill that would divide Maine into two states. He suggested that Northern and Central Maine be called “Maine” and Southern Maine be renamed “Northern Massachusetts.”
I don’t think that’s really necessary. But recognizing the obvious differences and taking the time to explore what our entire state has to offer means a great deal to us.
Tell us Portland isn’t a “real city.”
Just because Southern Maine is different doesn’t mean we’re not proud of it. There’s nothing that makes a flatlander sound more pretentious than telling us we don’t know what a real city is.
Portland is how Maine does a city. You can go and peruse a used-record store, get a $10 coffee, and eat a mediocre gyro from a street cart while still running into people you know everywhere, or, even better, running into people who know people you know. It’s a concentrated metropolitan paradise — what more do you need? More people urinating in public? Go to the Old Port.
Call us “hippies.”
Yes, many people moved here in the ’60s and ’70s. But most of them didn’t move here to fingerpaint, talk to a tree, and convulse to the Grateful Dead.
The back-to-the-land movement that’s still alive and well in Maine began primarily because of the inspirational experiences of pioneers like Helen and Scott Nearing. People came here because land was dirt cheap, and they wanted to learn how to work it, raise livestock, grow their own food, and separate from a society they didn’t relate to. Those people aren’t hippies. They’re hard workers.
Tell us to get rid of our junk.
Take any back road off Route 1A and you’ll see a charming assortment of mini junkyards in most backyards. Why would you get rid of your stove-up 1983 Volvo wagon when you might be able to put its motor into your other stove-up 1983 Volvo wagon?
Why would you get rid of the XR80 that’s been sitting under a tarp since you were 13? You might have a kid someday who wants to fracture her wrist on the Sunrise Trail because she’s riding a rusted-out XR80 that doesn’t even have a seat on it. You have to prepare for these things.
If there’s one thing every true Mainer knows, it’s that you can never have enough lawnmower engines.
Make us drive any distance over three miles.
If you want to witness a world-class example of a Maine tantrum (lots of throaty sighs and low growls) ask a person from Harrington to drive to Jonesport.
Many Mainers can almost completely self sustain on their land. When they have to leave it and run an errand that’s two towns away, it’s a hugely exasperating affair. We don’t get out much. And when we do, we can be a little pissed off about it.
Paradoxically, everything in Maine is ridiculously far away, and in many cases you really can’t get there from here. So, naturally, there are a lot of exasperated Mainers out there.
Tell us how to raise our children.
Maine kids are a breed all their own. At the Common Ground Fair, I once saw a 10-year-old get kicked in the chest by a mule. He walked it off.
Maine parents toughen up their babies from infancy. They don’t load them up with “kid coke” or bathe them in Purell. Maine kids aren’t gluten-free, sugar-free vegans with tree-nut allergies, and they certainly don’t have Twitter accounts.
When I was a kid, my mom would get a pile of dirt delivered to our backyard in a dump truck so we could all play in it. Seriously. A pile of dirt.
Be a lazy or dependent person.
Maine is a hardworking state. We’re a population of farmers, foresters, fishermen, hand laborers, and field workers.
If you try and tell us about how you didn’t work a job in high school, or about how your parents are still paying your rent, we’re not going to relate to you. And, honestly, we probably won’t be able to like you either.
Mainers relate to other hardworking Mainers. Sometimes it’s a little difficult for us to understand the lives and cultures of people “from away” because we automatically assume they don’t understand our lives and culture. But we really do try. All in all, Mainers are an accepting people. And we do want to get to know you.
Yay.... It's my birthday...
Posted 10 years agoWell another year has come and gone, Lol Keeping it as simple as I can I guess, Imma Sleep all day so it goes by
A worthwile test to be honest xD
Posted 11 years ago== Results from http://bdsmtest.org/ ==
93% Submissive
89% Slave
88% Bondage Receiver
80% Degradation Receiver
80% Girl/Boy
80% Masochist
80% Non-monogamist
73% Primal (Prey)
72% Brat
71% Exhibitionist
71% Experimentalist
71% Pervert
71% Voyeur
70% Primal (Predator)
63% Switch
43% Sadist
35% Bondage Giver
35% Daddy/Mommy
35% Degradation Giver
35% Master/Mistress
33% Vanilla
32% All-Rounder
31% Brat Tamer
25% Dominant
See my results online at http://bdsmtest.org/result.php?id=50628
93% Submissive
89% Slave
88% Bondage Receiver
80% Degradation Receiver
80% Girl/Boy
80% Masochist
80% Non-monogamist
73% Primal (Prey)
72% Brat
71% Exhibitionist
71% Experimentalist
71% Pervert
71% Voyeur
70% Primal (Predator)
63% Switch
43% Sadist
35% Bondage Giver
35% Daddy/Mommy
35% Degradation Giver
35% Master/Mistress
33% Vanilla
32% All-Rounder
31% Brat Tamer
25% Dominant
See my results online at http://bdsmtest.org/result.php?id=50628
Title? Nu nu nu nu nu No Title
Posted 11 years agoWell having been throughly ignored by everyone I've tried to talk to today (Minus the occasional text from my mate, although going on 3+ hours without one right now lol) I think Imma just toss in the towel, eat my 89 cent dinner and listen to music.
Personality Test
Posted 11 years agoSo having been challenged by my Mate (Cowboywolf93) to do this I did so, and I am amazed to see how close this actually describes me... I have the same personality as Plato and Al Pacino..... Wow.
FAMOUS INFJs:
Plato, Mahtma Gandhi, Simone de Beauvoir, Cate Blanchett, Al Pacino, Adrien Brody, David Schwimmer, Sufjan Stevens, George Harrison, Michel Pfeiffer, Carey Mulligan
PERCENTAGE OF INFJs AMONG POPULATION
1.5%
INFJ - DESCRIPTION
INFJs are kind, mindful, complex and highly intuitive people. This is the most rare personality type of all, only 1 percent of the population has it.
They like to organize their outer world in categories and priorities they never stop redefining. However, they have a great intuition and deal with their inner life very spontaneously. They perceive and understand things very intuitively and are very rarely wrong about their intuitions. This dichotomy between their inner and outer life may result in INFJs being less organized than other Judging types.
Because of their great instincts, INFJs understand people and situations very easily. They often feel when something has happened to some of their friends of family members even if they cannot really explain to themselves how they perceived it. Those strong intuitive capabilities may lead them sometimes to stubbornness and ignoring other people's opinions since they trust their instincts above everything else. This attitude should not be perceived as arrogance as INFJs are perfectionists and think they should always improve themselves and the world around.
INFJs set up a strong value system for themselves and always care about living in accordance with their values and ideals. They are warm and easy going as long as they do not have to compromise their values.
Warm and caring, they hate conflicts and will avoid hurting people. They will generally internalize their anger which can be a source of stress and health problems for them.
In the work place, most INFJs show up in creative and independent positions. They are good at art and sciences where they can use their intuition at best. They are generally bad at dealing with details and prefer working on the big picture.
INFJs are natural nurturers, protective and devoted. They make loving parents and build strong bonds with their children.
FAMOUS INFJs:
Plato, Mahtma Gandhi, Simone de Beauvoir, Cate Blanchett, Al Pacino, Adrien Brody, David Schwimmer, Sufjan Stevens, George Harrison, Michel Pfeiffer, Carey Mulligan
PERCENTAGE OF INFJs AMONG POPULATION
1.5%
INFJ - DESCRIPTION
INFJs are kind, mindful, complex and highly intuitive people. This is the most rare personality type of all, only 1 percent of the population has it.
They like to organize their outer world in categories and priorities they never stop redefining. However, they have a great intuition and deal with their inner life very spontaneously. They perceive and understand things very intuitively and are very rarely wrong about their intuitions. This dichotomy between their inner and outer life may result in INFJs being less organized than other Judging types.
Because of their great instincts, INFJs understand people and situations very easily. They often feel when something has happened to some of their friends of family members even if they cannot really explain to themselves how they perceived it. Those strong intuitive capabilities may lead them sometimes to stubbornness and ignoring other people's opinions since they trust their instincts above everything else. This attitude should not be perceived as arrogance as INFJs are perfectionists and think they should always improve themselves and the world around.
INFJs set up a strong value system for themselves and always care about living in accordance with their values and ideals. They are warm and easy going as long as they do not have to compromise their values.
Warm and caring, they hate conflicts and will avoid hurting people. They will generally internalize their anger which can be a source of stress and health problems for them.
In the work place, most INFJs show up in creative and independent positions. They are good at art and sciences where they can use their intuition at best. They are generally bad at dealing with details and prefer working on the big picture.
INFJs are natural nurturers, protective and devoted. They make loving parents and build strong bonds with their children.
Emoational Roller Coaster
Posted 11 years agoUgh need to vent but can't cause the person who owns this place is here. I just want to yell at the top of my lungs, scream, shout, break things and get all these pent up feelings of anger out of my system... Only issue is that I know what follows
>,> About an hour of uncontrollable crying.
So many things aren't going right for me, my career is at a dead end almost, my job gave me a pay raise but cut my hours so there's no increase in my paycheck, Actually I get a cut. I only get to see my mate for a few hours but one of the people I'm upset with gets to see him for hours at a whim.
Just spent 30 mins just sitting under the water of the shower trying not to cry cause the apartment owner is here and I don't want to get him involved in my issues cause right about now I really don't want to interact with him. I'm just so so all over the place that I don't know what to do with myself T_T I'm tired but I don't want to sleep, I've already eaten but I'm hungry again, Got a bottle of Jack But don't want to drink cause it'll all just come back later.
Jordan I need you right now, can I steal you from where you are?
>,> About an hour of uncontrollable crying.
So many things aren't going right for me, my career is at a dead end almost, my job gave me a pay raise but cut my hours so there's no increase in my paycheck, Actually I get a cut. I only get to see my mate for a few hours but one of the people I'm upset with gets to see him for hours at a whim.
Just spent 30 mins just sitting under the water of the shower trying not to cry cause the apartment owner is here and I don't want to get him involved in my issues cause right about now I really don't want to interact with him. I'm just so so all over the place that I don't know what to do with myself T_T I'm tired but I don't want to sleep, I've already eaten but I'm hungry again, Got a bottle of Jack But don't want to drink cause it'll all just come back later.
Jordan I need you right now, can I steal you from where you are?
Hmm Not a great start
Posted 11 years agoWell I got 4 days off of work and had some awesome plans but the universe in its great and infinite wisdom decided that that was not ow it was going to work. Well here is to hoping I can salvage the rest of my weekend. Not 100% sure on how I am going to do that but you know its worth a shot, I've got cash and time.
furious
Posted 11 years agoOmg *jumps screams and shouts* I hate my job, my boss, most of my life at the current time. All my hard work over the past year, just fucking wasted.
What a fun night
Posted 11 years agoSo after a month or so, I finally got to spend some time with my good friend Tucker, Took a shower together, Got dirty together and he left this poor Arctic Wolf Dripping with Equine seed at the end of it all. All in all a good end to the night if I do say so myself
Just a random question (Yiff related)
Posted 11 years agoA random question to all you furs with/without a mate who yiff with other people. A friend in LA (State not City), Have you ever yiffed with someone who as soon as they get off (and you haven't yet), they get dis-interested and leave you to your own devices while they go and do other things?
Just somewhere to vent (Explicit Content)
Posted 11 years agoSo I know not to many people if any actually read these things so I think its safe to vent here. A lot of things got me excited today only to have only a couple of things really shut me down.
Woke up today and realized that I'm only one step away from being able to apply for my dream job, If I pass this HAZMAT course I'll become a full fledged Baltimore County Firefighter. Then told that I need to get my stuff all figured out to move out... in 2 weeks, not all that bad, I new it was coming I just wish I was a little more prepared for it.
Got to work and if anyone knows my job situation at all, It suuuuuuucks (Shitty Walmart), well come to find out my job load was really light and I was complimented on my customer service (Rare), Changed my Taxes, and after alot on convincing I got my asst. Mgr. to change my work hours to fit my new travel schedule to and from work.
And thus ends the good stuff...... I get a text message, an old friend of mine wants to talk, we haven't talked sense my senior year in High School, and hes the one who helped me find out who I am and also my first BF (Ended on good terms even if we was very sexually controlling) so yeah sure I'm all for that. So this is the thing that really knocked me down,
I get him on Yahoo messenger and we are chatting and hes kind of hitting on me saying "Oh I'd like to move down there so we can hook up every once in a while, Are you still a freak like you were when you were with me" so on and so forth, Yes I'm in a sexually open relationship but I'm revisiting what I'm willing to do and who I'm willing to do it with. So I tell him that I'm engaged and am very happy with him and that yes we are open sexually but I don't think its a good idea for him to come all the way from Maine down to Maryland just so he can hook up with me.
All of a sudden he just explodes on me with "Your no good for anyone unless its bent over with a cock up your ass you fucking fur fag", "Your not meant to be with anyone unless your being used as a toy for their sexual satisfaction", "You fur fags are going to hell" and "The reason your sexually open is so that while he is "Dating" you he can see people he really loves but has a 100% guarenteed fuck toy"
Being the kind of person I am I look all tough on the outside but inside I'm a very sensitive person, It doesn't take much to wound me emoationally, Like an Ex said "your a teddy bear wrapped up in a big wrapper of tough ass firefighter." So I look for solace in those I hold dear and if I can't find it, the words just keep chewing at me.
So its at this point that I get off the chat and block him and this whole time I'm trying to get a hold of my Mate so we can figure out our moving and financial needs for our move. Come to find out hes with a friend so I can't really talk to him about the stuff I needed to originally or the stuff that just transpired. So I guess I'll have to wait until Sat. evening to talk to him about all this so in the meanwhile I'm going to either curl up in a ball cry a little and question if I'll have somewhere to go when I get kicked out while or work on my story and cry a little, although I already heave a head start on that already.
For those of you reading this, if you read it all, thank you for caring even just a little bit.
Woke up today and realized that I'm only one step away from being able to apply for my dream job, If I pass this HAZMAT course I'll become a full fledged Baltimore County Firefighter. Then told that I need to get my stuff all figured out to move out... in 2 weeks, not all that bad, I new it was coming I just wish I was a little more prepared for it.
Got to work and if anyone knows my job situation at all, It suuuuuuucks (Shitty Walmart), well come to find out my job load was really light and I was complimented on my customer service (Rare), Changed my Taxes, and after alot on convincing I got my asst. Mgr. to change my work hours to fit my new travel schedule to and from work.
And thus ends the good stuff...... I get a text message, an old friend of mine wants to talk, we haven't talked sense my senior year in High School, and hes the one who helped me find out who I am and also my first BF (Ended on good terms even if we was very sexually controlling) so yeah sure I'm all for that. So this is the thing that really knocked me down,
I get him on Yahoo messenger and we are chatting and hes kind of hitting on me saying "Oh I'd like to move down there so we can hook up every once in a while, Are you still a freak like you were when you were with me" so on and so forth, Yes I'm in a sexually open relationship but I'm revisiting what I'm willing to do and who I'm willing to do it with. So I tell him that I'm engaged and am very happy with him and that yes we are open sexually but I don't think its a good idea for him to come all the way from Maine down to Maryland just so he can hook up with me.
All of a sudden he just explodes on me with "Your no good for anyone unless its bent over with a cock up your ass you fucking fur fag", "Your not meant to be with anyone unless your being used as a toy for their sexual satisfaction", "You fur fags are going to hell" and "The reason your sexually open is so that while he is "Dating" you he can see people he really loves but has a 100% guarenteed fuck toy"
Being the kind of person I am I look all tough on the outside but inside I'm a very sensitive person, It doesn't take much to wound me emoationally, Like an Ex said "your a teddy bear wrapped up in a big wrapper of tough ass firefighter." So I look for solace in those I hold dear and if I can't find it, the words just keep chewing at me.
So its at this point that I get off the chat and block him and this whole time I'm trying to get a hold of my Mate so we can figure out our moving and financial needs for our move. Come to find out hes with a friend so I can't really talk to him about the stuff I needed to originally or the stuff that just transpired. So I guess I'll have to wait until Sat. evening to talk to him about all this so in the meanwhile I'm going to either curl up in a ball cry a little and question if I'll have somewhere to go when I get kicked out while or work on my story and cry a little, although I already heave a head start on that already.
For those of you reading this, if you read it all, thank you for caring even just a little bit.
No more depressing Crap for me.
Posted 11 years agoSo The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude to me, is more important then facts. It is more important then the past, then education, then money, then circumstances, then failure then success then what people say, think or do. It's more important then appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We can not change our past... we can not change the fact that people will act a certain way. We can not change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play the one string we have, and that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it and so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.
I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it and so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.
At my ropes end and im lost as to what to do.
Posted 11 years agoI'm not quite sure which Emotion fits me right now, Its like a combo of depressed, livid (extremely mad for those who don't know), and exhausted (Mentally, physically and emotionally).
There's no outlet, there's no getting over it, its just the way it is.
There's no outlet, there's no getting over it, its just the way it is.
Just so tired and feeling broken down
Posted 11 years agoAm I superior to you because I'm willing to run into burning building for free, to rescue people that I don't even know? No, That just means that I have the drive to do that.
Am I superior to you because I have been trained to save your life? No, that just means that I have the will to do it.
Am I superior to you just because I am willing to lay my life sown so that you may live? No, that just means that I have the constitution to do that.
But for all the reasons and that fact that I am a human being, I demand a little FRACKING RESPECT!
I'm not one of your backwater lackies that you can talk down to and belittle, I dont care if you had to work on your day off, I havent had a day off in a month between work, Volunteer firefighting and School. So get over yourself.
I know that I my seem like a strong person, but I can be compaired to the Vegas strip, Even though I look strong and like I'm always having good time, underneath I'm soft and your comments and remarks to bite away at me little by little breaking me down. So I depend more and More on the support of others like my Mate, but its hard for so many reasons.
I know most of my Journals are kinda depressing but need to vent somewhere where people might take notice and offer their advice or words of wisdom.
Am I superior to you because I have been trained to save your life? No, that just means that I have the will to do it.
Am I superior to you just because I am willing to lay my life sown so that you may live? No, that just means that I have the constitution to do that.
But for all the reasons and that fact that I am a human being, I demand a little FRACKING RESPECT!
I'm not one of your backwater lackies that you can talk down to and belittle, I dont care if you had to work on your day off, I havent had a day off in a month between work, Volunteer firefighting and School. So get over yourself.
I know that I my seem like a strong person, but I can be compaired to the Vegas strip, Even though I look strong and like I'm always having good time, underneath I'm soft and your comments and remarks to bite away at me little by little breaking me down. So I depend more and More on the support of others like my Mate, but its hard for so many reasons.
I know most of my Journals are kinda depressing but need to vent somewhere where people might take notice and offer their advice or words of wisdom.
3/26/2014 - When life hits you...
Posted 11 years agoJump back up and say you hit like a b***h, well unfortunatly I think I wasn't as well prepaired for her punch. Lots of things flowing through my mind, most of it ranging around my chosen occupation and such. Some of it in my relationship, like a bunch of questions that I want to ask but where it's only been four months, I know I have to wait, way to early. Need a stress reducer in my life and I can't find one T_T, in a peroid of ajustment and I think I'm slowly loosing my mind.
3/11/2014 - Well go figure
Posted 11 years agoSo I guess I should be used to it by now but go figure I'm a rebel and I'm not used to it. I got itched at by a person who I share a house with (My brothers mothers GF... Don't ask) She said that I do nothing but makes messes when I cook, that I eat their food, I'm too loud, I don't clean up after myself and I am discurtious to the fact that they are letting me live with them.
So here's the funny thing, she holds me to a cleaning standard that would be expected of a hospital room, I do my dishes, I clean up the bathroom after I use it, My room is none of her damn buissness and even more weird is, I work 32 Hours a day, making 7.70 and Hour. I pay $200.00 - $250.00 in rent each month, she works once or twice in two weeks and makes like $150.00 and gives up maybe $75.00 of it for rent. I pay HER way in "HER" house, But like I said, I should be used to being someones meal ticket.
I can't wait until me and my mate finally get our own place and I'm rid of her selfishness, I've dealt with it before and and I'm in no mood to deal with it now. But the sad part is, that if I bring it up, they will tell me to move out and thy will get another place with two other people, Some family I've got. Felling useless and really unwanted also kind of depressed. Need something or someone to cheer me up. Off to try to get a hold of cowboywolf.
So here's the funny thing, she holds me to a cleaning standard that would be expected of a hospital room, I do my dishes, I clean up the bathroom after I use it, My room is none of her damn buissness and even more weird is, I work 32 Hours a day, making 7.70 and Hour. I pay $200.00 - $250.00 in rent each month, she works once or twice in two weeks and makes like $150.00 and gives up maybe $75.00 of it for rent. I pay HER way in "HER" house, But like I said, I should be used to being someones meal ticket.
I can't wait until me and my mate finally get our own place and I'm rid of her selfishness, I've dealt with it before and and I'm in no mood to deal with it now. But the sad part is, that if I bring it up, they will tell me to move out and thy will get another place with two other people, Some family I've got. Felling useless and really unwanted also kind of depressed. Need something or someone to cheer me up. Off to try to get a hold of cowboywolf.
2/20/2014 - Kind of drepressed
Posted 11 years agoSo I suppose its easy to tell from the title that I'm feeling kind of down, Work is slowly killing me and the one person I feel that I can turn to is very busy trying to get himself back on track and I don't want to constantly complain to him.
I mean I feel used, I mean I knew working for the place I work at was a stepping stone but to be told I'm useless, that my job has no purpose and that I should start looking for other places of employment, I feel like an asset to the company alright.
I got shorted out $200 on my Tax return so my chance of getting a car/scooter is out the window so I cant go see my mate without relying on public transit, granted its only like $7.60 to go see him but its a 2-3 hour trip, so after i got there I wouldn't have much time to be with him T_T, it tears me up to be so close but so far.
I'm currently the only person in the house with a job who makes more the $200 a week and we pay $1700 a month for this place so I see my rent payment going up in the near future. so its going to make things more difficult on me.
I feel tired, on the outside I'm a very cheerful, delightful, kind person but under a semi-tough looking exterior, I just want to cry in my closet and sleep... a lot to get rid of this pain, My mate is doing so much to keep me on track and I hope he realizes that he holds me together.
I mean I feel used, I mean I knew working for the place I work at was a stepping stone but to be told I'm useless, that my job has no purpose and that I should start looking for other places of employment, I feel like an asset to the company alright.
I got shorted out $200 on my Tax return so my chance of getting a car/scooter is out the window so I cant go see my mate without relying on public transit, granted its only like $7.60 to go see him but its a 2-3 hour trip, so after i got there I wouldn't have much time to be with him T_T, it tears me up to be so close but so far.
I'm currently the only person in the house with a job who makes more the $200 a week and we pay $1700 a month for this place so I see my rent payment going up in the near future. so its going to make things more difficult on me.
I feel tired, on the outside I'm a very cheerful, delightful, kind person but under a semi-tough looking exterior, I just want to cry in my closet and sleep... a lot to get rid of this pain, My mate is doing so much to keep me on track and I hope he realizes that he holds me together.
2/18/14 Found some old stuff
Posted 11 years agoWow, I found some old stuff kicking around on my old flash drive, took me like 2 hours to get it to work so I figured were they are all related to furs I would upload thm to there and let people get an idea of some of my past (A LOT of crap) except the one from last month that one and is recent and hes a member on here so need I say more, Kinda bummed out reading them but I can't get ahold of my mate so I needed to pass some time, (I am really hopping he is okay) anyway if you read them all, I'll give you a medal.
- Original Date - 1/30/14 - I found him
Posted 11 years agoOkay so I know I said I wouldn't date anyone unless I knew that they would be honest and you know what I found him. End of story, Fin. Jordan is the most awesome Fur/Guy/Human Being that I have had the pleasure of meeting let alone dating. I can't help but admire what he was willing to do but someone must have a bigger plan for him and now I'm dating him. I know I can trust him, he's Loyal and bluntly honest thank god.
He doesn't live that far away and if worse comes to worse I'd walk out to see him. <3 Jordan Babe I love you, So much that I am having a hard time finding the words for it.
He doesn't live that far away and if worse comes to worse I'd walk out to see him. <3 Jordan Babe I love you, So much that I am having a hard time finding the words for it.
- Original Date - 8/10/12 Time lapse, Single, Dating, Single
Posted 11 years agoWell I haven't have a chance to get online and after this post I prob, wont for a while, So I ended up finding another fur, close and we hit it off, hes like 150 pounds blond hair and green eyes, Worked on the Air Base in Bangor, Tarmac Gas Tech, Did the refueling for the KC-130's. We ended up dating and the such.
well I guess he found another toy cause a couple weeks ago he got really distant and wouldn't text much and then one day it was a message like every 2-2,5 hrs that he would send me but I was texting him like cray cray well come to find out (The hard way) I found out he was cheating on me, (I him making out with another guy in the mall).
We talked and he said it had been going on for a whole week - two weeks....... With another fur. Well needless to say I got really depressed and tried to off myself but thakfully it didn't work. But Now I'm headed to job corps in Bangor ME. We will see how my life goes from now on. I'm not going to date again until I know I have found someone I can trust.
well I guess he found another toy cause a couple weeks ago he got really distant and wouldn't text much and then one day it was a message like every 2-2,5 hrs that he would send me but I was texting him like cray cray well come to find out (The hard way) I found out he was cheating on me, (I him making out with another guy in the mall).
We talked and he said it had been going on for a whole week - two weeks....... With another fur. Well needless to say I got really depressed and tried to off myself but thakfully it didn't work. But Now I'm headed to job corps in Bangor ME. We will see how my life goes from now on. I'm not going to date again until I know I have found someone I can trust.
- Original Date - 4/1/12 - FML, AGAIN! WHY?!?
Posted 11 years agoI can t be this worthless that you have to cheat on me just because all we do is talk, I love a physical relationship but you told me not to visit you, I told you I'd find a way to come down but no, and now I see why. I'm through with you and your shit. I'm going to find someone who loves me for me, not my size, location, money or Job.
-Original Date - 3/25/12 - Wth is going on, Not Again I hope
Posted 11 years agoSo I got kicked out of my grandfathers house, been accused of 2 crimes and my BF hasnt texted me at all today except a message this morning, Should be used to it by now, hes been like this the past few days now, I get the feeling what has happened to me the past 2 times is going to happen again but I'm hoping for the best.
- Original Date - 2/2/12 - New bf
Posted 11 years agoGod I have a new Mate, I'm so happy! He a wicked nice guy we talk a lot, finally got to meet him the other night (Didn't yiff so dont ask) We aren't going to see much of each other cause hes moving but I trust him, plus we have YIM and Facebook.
