I just feel so... Unnecessary. All I'm doing is coasting through life, barely even really living. I don't like it, but I have absolutely no motivation to change it. It's kind of like there's just no point to my life and like it's just going to hit a dead end. I never seem to be good enough at anything other than sitting and doing nothing. What's the point to all of this if nothing at all happens that is really fucking fantastic. I just... Don't know. Maybe it's just a bout of depression or something, but I've been pretty non-depressed for a long while. But I've also felt this way for a long while. Like there is just absolutely no point to my life and that nothing fantastic will ever come out of it. I'm just running on a hamster wheel and not getting anywhere. My life just feels stagnant and that I don't have the slightest clue what to do about it. Everyone around me is so happy, living their life and having their intimate relationships, and I just feel like I bring that down. No matter how much they tell me I don't, or how awesome I am, I just don't fully believe them. After all, I'm always passed up for my friends, because my friends are all outgoing, sexually aware, and proportionate. Then I'm there, shy, naive, innocent and pear-shaped. Never good enough, hopelessly pointless, lost in the woods and I can't see a clear path to change that..... But I'm rambling, I suppose. Just needed to get this out.

 RedDyeNo5 is giving away free art for five days. Red is an amazing artist, so don't take advantage of this!

Here's a link to the Rules: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/4178322/

And here's a link to the Sign up: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/...../#cid:30809624

I was bored. ~shrugs~

Light Elemental
[X] You're proud of who you are
[ ] You state your opinion
[X] You think you're intelligent
[ ] You enjoy learning
[X] You're raised in a very traditional way
[X] You hardly show emotions
[ ] You're a morning person
[ ] You don't like people who sleep around a lot
[ ] You don't like the dark
[X] You're hard on yourself when you fail
Total: 5

Dark Elemental
[ ] You always say what's on your mind.
[X] You're a night person
[X] You like having sex/like the idea of sex
[X] You don't like mornings
[ ] You don't like happy-go-lucky people
[ ] You argue with people a lot
[X] You laugh at stupid people
[X] You hold on to grudges
[ ] You love scary stories
[X] You're often found in dark places, like under a shade, beneath a blanket, etc.
Total: 6

Nature Elemental
[X] You love animals and nature
[X] You love being outdoors
[X] You're somewhat gullible
[X] You're shy around new people
[X] You're very understanding/a good listener
[ ] You forgive easily
[ ] You're not a good fighter
[ ] You don't like eating meat
[X] You protect what you hold most dear
[X] You love drinking water
Total: 7

Water Elemental
[ ] You're a good swimmer
[X] You love fish
[X] You're very curious
[X] You like to explore
[X] You day dream a lot
[ ] You don't usually like to talk
[X] You like doing things by yourself
[X] You like to imagine things for your amusement
[X] You're open minded
[ ] You like things to stay the same
Total: 7

Fire Elemental
[X] You have a bad temper
[ ] You love hearing gossip
[ ] You like to fight
[X] You're kind of slow sometimes
[X] You're attracted to the 'bad boy/girl'
[ ] You have a strong sense of justice
[X] You'd beat up someone if they hurt your friends
[X] You're also gullible
[X] You like to see things burn
[ ] You hate swimming/water
Total: 6

Wind Elemental
[X] You're very easy-going
[X] You're somewhat lazy
[X] You love to laugh and make jokes
[ ] People think you're immature
[X] You tend to be a skeptic
[X] You're very competitive
[X] You love getting new things
[ ] You live everyday fully
[X] You love riding with the window down
[X] You enjoy having a large group of friends
Total: 8

Thunder Elemental
[ ] You tend to blow up when you're mad
[ ] You like things to be unpredictable
[ ] You like to live dangerously
[ ] You love having competitions, contests etc.
[ ] You love coming up with impossible scenarios
[ ] You like being the center of attention
[X] You love thunder storms
[ ] You tend to only want a tight knit group
[X] You don't trust others easily
[ ] You don't forgive easily
Total: 2

Ice Elemental
[X] You don't express yourself very well
[ ] You like winter better than summer
[X] You don't need/wear heavy coats during the winter
[X] You tend to be sarcastic sometimes
[X] You're sometimes a loner
[X] You tend to keep to yourself
[X] It's hard for people to get close
[X] When someone does though, you tend to stick with them no matter what
[X] You enjoy reading and other "one" person activities
[X] You can be 'cold' when someone's upset
Total: 9


Hm.... Seems I'm a bit of an ice elemental..... Weird.

Hmm... I need to get caught up on my submission list. XD Have nearly eight hundred I have to go through. I just got my computer to my apartment, and I'll be able to go through them soon, hopefully. But... I need to play Assassin's Creed III.... O_O' .... ~goes back to video game~

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3809479/



Yo! Above is a link to the journal of a free tee shirt raffle. Check it out!!

 reddyeno5 is having a sale! Bust lineart for $3! For more details, check out this journal!

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3722948/

 Catguice is having a custom t-shirt raffle! I checked out their page and the shirts they make look pretty good, so you should check it out! Below is the journal with the rules, so go check it out!

http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3713924/

 Narcotic-Sprinkles is having and emergency character auction due to pricey car issues. They seriously need the money, so check it out, and if you can't bid, pimp soonish, because it ends later tonight.

It is a very bright colored character, and you can change some things on it and, depending on how much you pay, you can get ever more art of the character!

So check it out!
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/853...../#cid:58800647

I got a picture of my character Mei! My half Leopard, half falcon demon. I only got her human form, but it's fantastic looking. and it was only $15.

 reddyeno5 is having a sale!
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3704244/

You have to check it out! Her art is fantastic and it's worth every cent and more!

An awesome artist,  mei5683, is having a free art raffle! Go watch her! And then I can win things! >D DO THIS FOR ME!!! And for Mei, of course.... And yourself, if you possibly want free arts.... =D

The journal of the free raffle-age:
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/3453716/

LOVE HER! LOVE ME! LURVE!!! <3



Woot.

I'm thinking about getting a ref sheet for my Rawr_The_Monkey character. Need to come up with a full idea of what she looks like, though... Maybe I should get one of my Mei character, too... Eventually.

I don't know. What does everyone else think? I found a girl who does them for relatively cheap.  Mei5683 does general Ref sheets for about forty bucks and works on written descriptions, and their art seems pretty good too.... I don't know...

.... Yes.... That is about all I have to say. I am no less stressed then before, and am actually more stressed. I'm thinking that I should take up karate or belly dancing or something. I just.... I want this, so far, endless shit storm to end. I think I should go see how much karate lessons would cost me, or something... And how often I have to go or what time the beginners lessons begin, or something....... Hitting shit would probably be the most helpful....

Not to bitch.... But this is the fifth or sixth time this year that my emotions have been kicked down..... And I went further down than I'm used to. Almost went suicidal, actually. I really want this shit storm to end. There have been three deaths in my family. And my ex, who slept with me the night before he broke up with me, seems to have already gotten himself a new girlfriend.... It's been three weeks today since he broke up with me... He apparently couldn't even make it that long....

 InkFall is pretty awesome. And they're thinking about doing a bit of free art. I figured I'd try for it. But you should definitely check them out.

I don't know how much worse this year can get... And I REALLY don't want to know.... I made it three months into the year before it went to shit. First! My grandmother died right after my birthday. Sad, I know. Then, my boyfriend fell out of love with me and broke up with me nearly a week and a half to two weeks ago. My great aunt died two weeks ago. Oh! And to top it all off, my grandfather is now in the hospital. With a possible blood clot.... Which is what his wife died because of a month ago. I.... Hate this year, so far..... I really hope it doesn't get worse....

Blah blah blah, new journal, blah blah blah.

Why'd I do this? Because I'm bored.

1.)Are you kinky?
More than likely.

2.)Have you had sex?
Nope.

3.)Do you like anal?
Don't think I would.

4.)Are you bi gay or les?
Straight

5.)Do you like to be spanked?
Maybe...?

6.)Ever spank someone?
Yep.

7.)Do you watch porn or have you?
I have... And it was kind of accidental, the first time... Brother left a video in a vcr tv and I didn't realize the tv would automatically turn on and play the movie if you pushed the video back in...

8.)Have you ever touched a penis? (not of your own if your a guy)
Not that I'm aware of.

9.)How do you think you are in bed?
Not a clue.

10.)Top or bottom?
Both, I suppose.

11.)Ever done cowgirl?
Nope.

12.)Ever been ate out or ate someone out?
Nope.

13.)Are you a dirty girl/boy?
That is highly possible.

14.)Can I spank you?
....... No.....

15.)Can you tell I cant think of much more to say thats dirty?
Ye~ap.

16.)Whats one dirty thing you like to say?
-giggle- Oh, god, don't touch me there! That's my ticklish spot. (Thank you NCIS for the first part of that. Go Ziva!)

17.)Whats a fetish of yours?
.... Biting, I believe... And nibbling and scratching. Haven't tried, though. XD

18.)Bed or couch?
Whatever.

19.)Dominate or be dominated?
Would depend on my mood, I suppose.

20.)Was it as good for you as it was for me?
.... Probably not...

21.)Where would you LOVE to loose your virginity?
... Uh.... In a bed?

22.)How many penises have you seen or touched in your life?
Seen:
Uh... I don't know... Three?

Touched:
Not many... Can't recall if I had... Might have accidentally as a child. XD

23.)How many boobs have you seen or touched?
Seen:
Lots.

Touched:
A few...? O_o'

24.)How many times do you masturbate weekly?
Uh... Depends on how horny I am, I suppose...

25.)If you could see anyone you wanted in the nude, who would it be?
.... Sean Patrick Flanery or Ryan Reynolds.

26.)If you could have sex with anyone you wanted, who would it be?
..... Uh... A male.... Probably the same as above. Or a guy who actually likes me...

27.)On a scale of 1 to 10, how horny are you?
3...?

28.)Would you ever send a naked pic of yourself to someone?
Maybe.

29.)Would you swallow someone's cum?
Once again... Maybe...

30.)How do you like it?
Not a clue.

31.)Do you have any crushes on anyone?
Yeah. I get crushes easily.

32:)What's your favorite porn site?
Don't really have one.

33.)How big is your dick/boobs?
36 b... Small... ^_^'

34.)When was the last time you masturbated?
No clue.

35.)What's your favorite part of your body?
Uh.... Hair and wrists... And the shape of my torso, sometimes.

You simply must watch this artist!  LauraGarabedian

She is an awesome artist who works in watercolor, and has an amazing talent for it! GO WATCH Laura!! @_@

I finally decided to make a journal. And I think I'm probably going to mention a few of my favorite artists. ^_^

 Venigsun is a fantastic artist who I found, I'm pretty sure, through an add here on face book. But I'm not entirely sure on that one, anymore. Their art is so realistic that my IRL friend Jynx always asks if it's a painting/drawing.
 Doffa is another fantastic artist, who I like to think of as a friend. He has a dedication to his art that I envy, and that love of drawing shows in the excellence of his work. And I always enjoy watching him stream.
 Syntharia_Desire is the reason I found Doffa. She is awesome at what she does and hers was the first stream I ever went to. And it took me a little to get adjusted, but I had a blast watching her draw Doffaballs.
 nix Is another awesome artist that I've gotten to talk to on here. Generally during Doffa's streams, and a few times during hers.
 labrum was one of the first people I watched, I believe. Her art is awesome, as well.
 Rukis is an artist I found through the adds. I've taken a liking to their art, and am even enjoying reading their Red Lantern comic.
 firefly8083 is an amazing artist whose work is down right kick ass! I've watched one or two of her streams and find watching her work to be a pleasure.
 celyn is an artist I found due to Doffa. I've joined her streams and love watching her work. She draws pin-ups and I find that awesome.
 WhiteMantis Another amazing artist. She has an awesome mantis geisha character that she draws wonderfully. I love seeing new art by her.
 Iolis A wonderful artist whose art amuses me and is just awesome in general!
 Syphelium is an awesome artist who I found through one of Doffa's journals. She's pretty young, but she is already an excellent artist! And she's doing a free art thing. I'll put a link to that journal.
http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/...../#cid:19586386


A few artists I found a bit more recently that I find intriguing.

 Mahi_Mahi  Lingrimm  Anniepopokios  Chunnie  CookieHana  myrakineoro  Jenpen  AnodyneGeno  Caltroplay  pusspuss  Strype


And my IRL friends. ^^

 Jynx101  Almaren  Nikdo


So yeah... Thought I'd just do that. ^_^ Not many people watch me, but still! If you actually read this, thank you. And I know that I forgot a few people, but as you can see... I was running out of space anyways. Heh.

Rawr.