I feel like I've heard of some in passing, but I've also heard of some that were problematic and/or phishing scams. Has anyone reading this used one that's in any way useful and not totally borked?

I might be getting a Kidney tomorrow morning o.o possible surgery scheduled at 7:30am, so please wish me luck TwT If I delete this journal, means I did not get it TwT

So I think I have a form of "Aphantasia," "a phenomenon in which people are unable to visualize imagery. While most people are able to conjure an image of a scene or face in their minds, people with Aphantasia cannot." I heard about it on an episode of Distractable with Markiplier, Bob and Wade. They were discussing it at one point because I believe Bob said he has it. I think I have a form of it, not quite as intense as the way Bob described it, but I often find myself unable to dream at night, but not totally unable to (I do have dreams from time to time).

The main reason I think I have it is because I massively struggle with trying to draw something strictly from memory. If I do not have a reference nearby, I find it almost impossible to get a clear image in my head of how something should look. This may perhaps be due to a lack of practice, experience or skills, however, but I find it relatively easy and somewhat relaxing to draw with a reference. Pretty much all the artwork in my gallery was done with some form of reference nearby.

Something else that may be triggering this phenomenon is a nerve condition I have called "Allodynia," which basically is a condition in which my brain has issues interpreting the signals from my body, and instead intensifies them more-so than normal people. This leads to a variety of symptoms, from "things hurting that should not (such as clapping, or washing my hands)" to "things that do hurt, hurt WAY more." In addition, it messes with my inner-ear function and makes it very easy for me to lose my balance, especially if I am standing still (I have to sway back and forth to keep my balance, weirdly). It's NOT NORMAL!

So, because of this, I am almost always experiencing some kind of pain, somewhere. It makes me wonder if I have an issue detaching my consciousness from my body long enough to get it to do anything else (such as get a clear mental picture of something, or fucking dream). I don't know, it all just sucks :C

Can we get some Gat Dang Lop (From Star Wars Visions) fan-art up in here >w< She is so cute! I am 100% in love with her.

Discord: https://discord.gg/j5dsFx

I try to do JackBox games every Sunday starting at 8:00pm, so if you're reading this now, hop on in :D You can watch the game stream thru discord, voice chat or text chat, and play using your phone or another browser window :3

I see more and more people "selling" their OC's, and honestly it kind of makes me sick.

The reasoning behind that is as such:
1: It seems like a cheap cash grab
2: It's even worse if you got the character from somebody else (such as adoptables, etc)
3: And probably most importantly of all, I tend to think of my character ("RCT") as my personification. He represents me, and I would never want to sell him, even if somebody made an offer (although I know no one would, as my character is extremely generic [orange fox with purple paws/ears]).

I just feel like I'm so disconnected from the furry fandom. I don't understand the idea of having multiple fursonas. People say 'oh each one represents me in a different mood." You can have more than 1 fucking mood. If you want my honest opinion, people getting "new characters' is just a plea for attention. It's a "Hey, look at this new character I have!" and everyone in their telegram group says "Ohh, nice character' and they get their ego boners for a few days, then it passes, and a few weeks or months later they come in with a new one when their attention quota is running low. But of course you can't bring this up because then it becomes a personal attack and that person gets all their friends together to flame you and belittle anything you have to say (I've seen it happen so, so many times). I also think sometimes people change their fursona so that other people will change their opinion of them. "Oh, character 1 was rude and kinda shitty, but character 2 is sweet and innocent." Nope, it's the same shitty person, with a fresh coat of paint that they paid real money for. #HotTakes

50% of submissions on FA are YCH's or adoptables, most of which are cookie-cutter or duplicates; if I'm going to get art of my character, I want it to be original, I don't want it looking like 15 other pieces. I also can't fathom the crazy amount of money some artists are bringing in (especially the pron artists). I'm super jealous, the fact that one art piece can garner as much money as I make in a month (or more) in some cases. The social status quo is in full effect in the furry fandom.

In all honesty, I'm feeling disconnected from everything (both Furry and regular society), and it scares me. Kids like weird shit and terrible music. Other people my age are working on careers or having kids. I'm stuck living with my parents dealing with diabetes and kidney failure. I can't get my own place cause living alone is too expensive (even though I have a full time job and make more than minimum wage). I don't know what to do about it, and living the day-to-day grind just gets worse and worse, mostly thanks to my insane brother who continues to be a cancer to me and my parents.

Sorry, I didn't originally mean to turn this into an existential crisis, but I suppose that's how it goes sometimes. It just feels relieving to vent.

https://youtu.be/d_fKMr5Abgk

I thoroughly enjoyed this xD

But seriously, my new music video has finally been completed, and is available to watch here:

https://youtu.be/lDubveHaXFk

Go check it out and feel free to leave comments :D I'm very happy, myself, with how it came out ^_^

If you guys like it, please share it! x3 I want it to get as many views as possible <3

So my birthday is tomorrow and it's already shaping up to be a pretty good day I think xD At work today, one of my co-workers brought in a cake he made for me (well, more like a big chocolate pie sort of thing), and it's all like sliced already and the pieces are wrapped in wax paper xD Can't wait to dig into that thing :3

Also, somebody from a nearby bar/restaurant gave me two tokens for a free beer o.o Gave one to my roommate, not sure if I'll use the other one myself, but it was cool of the guy to give them to me :3

So tomorrow I'm going to Golden Corral (ridiculously-good weekend-only breakfast buffet) with my folks, gonna load up on wonderfully bad-for-me breakfast foods, then chill out til the evening when I'm headed out with a friend to see the Avengers movie.

I think it's going to be a good 26th birthday :p hopefully it'll be better than my 25th o.o

Bear
[ ]-you're the guy/gal nobody wants to mess with
[ ]-you're quite lazy, and don't like the cold
[ ]-you're the biggest in your group of friends
[ ]-you are easy to get anger, especially when protecting those that are close
[ ]-you are a big eater, and will eat more than everyone else at the table
[ ]-you frighten others easily, but get frightened easily yourself
[ ]-you let your muscles do the talking
[ ]-you like to eat berries and fish
[ ]-you can sleep for days on end
[ ]-you're the "warrior" of the group

Total Points = 0

Wolf
[ ]-you look out for those that are close to you, and are fiercely loyal
[x]-you prefer to stay in small groups of friends
[x]-you are protective of what you have, and can sometimes be greedy
[ ]-you are tough, and can handle smaller injuries
[x]-most people adore you
[ ]-you like to run in wide open spaces
[ ]-you're favourite game is tag
[ ]-you snarl over things that annoy you ( i wouldnt call it a snarl.. more of a aggravated grunt. )
[ ]-you enjoy to play fight
[ ]-you're the "knight" of the group

Total Points = 3

Owl
[x]-you are very perceptive, and have great vision
[]-you stay up most of the night, and sleep in longer than most
[x]-you don't eat much, but what you do eat sates your hunger
[ ]-you are very fast and stealthy
[x]-you prefer to pick your foes off one at a time
[ ]-you are double jointed
[x]-you can move almost silently when the need arises
[]-you have long sharp finger nails
[]-you are known as very beautiful
[x]-you're the "archer" of the group

Total Points = 5

Fox
[x]-you are clever, and let your wits settle your problems
[ ]-you are fast, and able to escape danger easily
[x]-you are the weakest in your group, but not necessarily the easiest prey
[x]-you are stealthy, and prefer to avoid conflict when possible
[x]-you would rather get into you enemy's head rather than their face
[x]-you are agile but clumsy sometimes
[ ]-you have red hair
[x]-you don't like others being where they're not suppose to be
[]-you enjoy sneaking up on people
[x]-you're the "thief" of the group

Total Points = 7

Deer
[ ]-you like to be around a lot of people, and stick with crowds
[ ]-you can escape danger with pure speed and endurance
[ ]-most consider you the easiest prey
[ ]-you aren't very strong, but when you're angry you can pack a punch
[ ]-most consider you very graceful
[x]-you have very acute senses, especially hearing and smelling
[ ]-you are a vegetarian
[ ]-you love the ballet
[ ]-gymnastics are your specialty
[ ]-you're the "cleric" of the group

Total Points = 1

Bat
[ ]-nighttime is your time to shine
[x]-the daylight blinds you a lot
[ ]-you don't see very well or at all
[x]-you'd rather fly than walk
[x]-you are known as different
[]-you have big ears and/or long fingers
[ ]-you like hanging upside down
[ ]-you like sleeping during the day
[]-you're "One of a Kind"
[]-you're the "spy" of the group

Total Points = 3

Rat
[ ]-you're considered evil and dark and sometimes emo
[]-you like areas that are damp and dark
[ ]-you practice or want to practice magic or the dark arts
[ ]-you prefer candle light over regular light
[ ]-your favorite color is black
[]-you love things that have to do with skulls or death
[ ]-you have a demon inside of you struggling to get out
[]-you enjoy being alone
[x]-you hate your parents/siblings[Sometimes, but doesn't everyone?]
[]-you're the "death" of the group

Total Points = 1

Mouse
[ ]-you're very timid and skittish around almost anything
[ ]-you're the one most bullies can stuff into a locker
[ ]-cats scare you
[ ]-you have nightmares almost every night
[x]-you still sleep with a stuffed animal
[ ]-night lights are your best friends
[ ]-your meals are quite small
[ ]-you have friends that you can hide behind
[ ]-you are known as being quiet and baby cute
[ ]-you're the "coward" of the group

Total Points = 1

Pig
[ ]-you're known as being smelly and uncleaned
[ ]-you sleep in trash
[ ]-eating is your favorite sport
[ ]-chocolate and pizza are considered healthier snacks than apples to you
[ ]-you sometimes wear the same clothes for two weeks in a row
[ ]-showers and soap are your worst enemy/nightmares
[x]-you tend to break wind a lot :C
[x]-mud is your best friend
[ ]-your house is a mess but you don't care
[ ]-you're the "slob" of the group


Total Points = 2

Monkey
[x]-you're happy-go-lucky and random
[ ]-you love eating bananas
[ ]-you are known as cute but dangerous
[x]-you love swinging and heights
[ ]-you are awesome at climbing trees
[ ]-you know how to say things in sign language
[x]-playing is your specialty
[x]-you enjoy joking around
[ ]-you can stay awake forever if you wanted to
[x]-you're the "fun one" of the group

Total Points = 4

Snake
[ ]-you love being evil and mean
[ ]-you're the type to smash people into a wall
[ ]-you carry a knife with you at all costs
[ ]-you've had over 10 girlfriends/boyfriends
[/]-you're no longer a virgin
[ ]-you've been arrested before
[/]-you love partying
[ ]-you usually eat your meals whole or chew only twice or so
[x]-leather is epic to you
[ ]-you're the "criminal" of the group

Total Points = 2

Final Result: Unsurprisingly I'm a fox :3 With Owl traits, which makes sense cause I often consider both my parent to be owls, and a little bit of monkey :D

Do keep in mind I didn't check those boxes because they're in the fox catigory, but I checked all marked boxes because they do apply to me. All the non-checked boxes do not apply to me, or do not apply to me all the time. Some may be situational (I love being evil and mean in rare situations, for example, but not all the time).

So my old roomie Joe is back in Louisville and he's getting a job and we put in an application to our old apartment complex :D Everything looks very promissing, so assuming nothing goes catastrophically wrong, I'll have my own place again soon :D

They're so yummy @_@ I would DO REECE RIGHT NOW!

My Dad had a heart attack last night and I spent almost all night with him and my mom in the hospital. He had an initial surgery to see what the problems were, and they found out his heart is in really bad shape :c So this morning, probably about now, they're going to try to do a type of bypass surgery on him. There's a very small chance he won't survive (20% they said), but I'm confident my Dad can make it through it. If he's survived taking care of my retarded brother, a surgery should be nothing.

It's bad, though, cause even if he does survive (which he should), he won't be able to work and my parents will have to declare bankruptcy. We will probably lose the house, and who knows what will happen after that. I had hoped to be moved out before that ever happened, but no dice *sigh*

If ya'll will, please keep my Dad in your thoughts and prayers and what-not. It's just been a terrible year ><

[EDIT!] Well his surgery was succesful, or so much as it could be, I guess. He had to have 5 bypasses done to his heart, but he's in stable condition and he'll survive. I'm very glad, as I was really worried about what would happen if he had passed, but hopefully that won't happen for another few decades at least <3

So it seems the common theme for halloween scary is all blood, gore, murdering, weapons and things of that nature. That's all well and good, I guess, but I'm one of those people you can't really threaten with death and whatnot.

So, what scares me? Well it's the subject of tonight's word!

Okay, no it's not.

So, if I were to go out in costume for halloween (which I'm not, because I'm out sick with bronchitis), I'd go as a Doctor. No, not a "zombie" doctor, or a "sexy" doctor (which I already am, let's be honest), I'd just go as a plain old doctor.

But, Aaron, that's not scary D: THAT'S NOT SCARY AT ALL!

Oh, well it might not be, at least until I hand you your hospital bill. "WHAT?! FIFTY BAJILLION DOLLARS?!?! OH MY GOD!!!@$!@!%_@%!_#%)!_@)%!@"

Yep, nothing scarier than a really high hospital bill D: Imagine if all those scary ghouls and ghosts instead of just threatening you with death would instead poke you in your eye just to send you to the hospital? PRETTY SCARY D: I'd run away screaming if a skeleton jumped out at me and shouted "Hospital Bill!" D:

Anyway, this was all funnier in my head o.o now it doesn't seem quite as funny. Fuck all ya'll healthy bastards :c

So tomorrow Me and  eleon are going up to Kings Island in Cincinnati, Ohio D: Gonna have my camera so I shall record all of the fun awesomeness o.o BE AFRAID D:

"A scientific Panel has recommended against prostate testing... but my prostate was up all night cramming!"



I <3 Stephen Colbert :3

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a.....da-baby-po.jpg

:D <3 ugh I just wanna squeeze him x3

Awesome movie x3 Lots of laughs and a good story and omg furries and what-not xD Was awesome and fun to watch :3 Also almost had me crying for a second there cause of a sad flashback xD almost, but not quite. Though I did well up a lil'. Was a good movie and I recommend it to anyone who saw the first and thought it was funny and/or enjoyable, as this movie is even moreso.

Only real issue I had with it is that there was no real character development for anyone in the movie besides Po. Like the furious five didn't really get any particularly unique lines or roles. They just seemed to tag along. At least Master Tigress got some love though. I'm totally fanboy'ing over Master Tigress D:

so I downloaded the demo of Fruity Loops cause I've been wanting to get back into making music again, and holy balls o.o this shit looks complicated x.x compared to the program I used to use, that shit was like macaroni and glitter compared to this o.0 I guess if I really want to use it, I'll have to watch tons of tutorials and learn all that shit xD I was hoping it would at least be similar to what I used to use, but it doesn't seem that way *sigh* Oh well, maybe someday I'll have enough interest to actually knuckle down and learn that shit o.o ugh.

Soooo Goooooood :D Made me want to choke a baby! IN HELL! TO THE YATZEES!!!

https://youtu.be/ZZnflacbwQE

I <3 weekend players <3<3<3<3<3<3

So this Friday, May 6th, I'm turning 25 D: *eccited!*

Now I'm not asking people to get me something or do anything special like make a card or a doodle or get me a gift or anything o.o but I certainly am thinking it very loudly :3

Actually, I'm really making this as a request to anyone watching me who might be interested in surprising an old fox with something special, even if it were just a doodle of some kind. It's been a rough year for me, as I know it has been for most everyone, and I feel like any kind of gift I can get, be it a doodle or anything, would greatly lift my spirits this year and make me feel a lot better :3

So, if anyone can do anything, even if it's something simple and small, I'd really, really appreciate it xD Even if ya can't, or just don't want to, then don't worry about it :p Either way, I hope to have fun this friday. Gonna go to Denny's for a free breakfast, then probably just wing it for the rest of the day. I don't have any plans other than that, and going to Applebees sometime after 10pm for their half-price appetizers (mmm, wan-ton tacos <3333).

I hope everyone has a great year :D may all your days be good, and your drama llamas be quenched.

With the greatest lube on earth! K.Y. Jelly!"


"We just spent some time in Vegas!"
"Vegas? Where'd ya stay?"
"Circus Circus. They have the loosest slots!"
"Hey, speaking of loose slots.. K.Y. JELLY! We'll be right back!"

I love you SNL.

and fight against PerlHarbor and have it use Self-Destruct :D

Or name a pokemon after the power plant Fukushima and teach it "Explosion, sludge, embargo, and toxic" :3 Will be epic.

Coincidentally, I'm a horrible person :D discuss! <3

I want some @_@ Also gloves/arm-warmers if they make them x3