So I've been playing an unhealthy amount of MHA: Strongest Hero on my tablet and may have found a build that makes Aizawa instakill any enemy heroes in Super Coop/War Zone Coop mode. It's safe to say Mr. Aizawa can banish people to the Shadow Realm now lmao.

Though I'm mediocre in MOBA games now I think it's pretty fun and wouldn't mind having some competent players with me. If you don't know what I'm talking about then here is the trailer.

I've been doing fairly bleh as of late, my grandma was put in hospice a few days ago and it's got me feeling rather down. Did get to see her today and watched a movie with her and talked for a bit but knowing her body is deteriating and that she can no longer have medicine weighs down on me, that these are the last moments I will have with her. I just hope she passes in her sleep with no pain what so ever.

I do have a commission I will post at some point that I got with a friend of mine and got a few more being worked on that I've paid for so there is that and my store's inventory is coming up so I've been working a lot of overtime as of late and haven't really had much time to relax.

Anyhow I'll try to keep myself from thinking too much about certain things and just think positive though that's a bit hard for me to do honestly. Well that's all I have to say for now, hope you guys are doing alright.

This is hilarious yet sad, the cotton candy is like anything good that comes in my life, it just disintegrates within seconds lol

I just made it a little over 1k watchers the other day, never thought I'd have so many be remotely interested in me or my 'sona but it makes me happy and rather flattered to be liked that much. I've been here for more than a decade and have learned so much about myself and the fandom in general, I've had plenty of hard times and have had people to lean on when I needed it most and I tried to do the same when I could. Anyways I know I'm not the most sociable person now a days due to stuff but as I stated plenty of times, I do appreciate each watch, fav and comment on my stuff and it makes me want to keep getting stuff cause I know someone, somewhere would enjoy the content. I can't do anything special for this occassion now but maybe later on I can commission an artist to do a ych/raffle thing with my dobie (or my other characters) and have the other character be one of you watchers though as for the theme I'd like your input and if there is something I see a lot of you want then we can roll with that.

Anyways that's all I wanted to say, thanks for reading and keep on being awesome~

Sometimes it's hard to find trustworthy artists who work effeciently as well as keep you up to date on the progress of your commissions but I had to make this journal for two artists I recently hired and they not only give excellent feedback but their turnaround speed is amazing!

 nottvarg Is extremely fast, I know icons aren't full body pictures but he finishes them in less than a few hours and they look incredibly good! Also he has them on sell for 10 GBP so get them while they are hot as this discount won't be up there forever, I will upload the one he did for me pretty soon.

 diokami Though I'm unsure if he's really accepting more work at this time, I think he's definitely worth keeping an eye on for when he does start opening up slots. He did a full macro/micro commission for me with details in about a week or so with daily updates and he just seems really passionate about his work. Not only that, compared to others who do similar stuff, he is very affordable...infact I gave him a tip cause I felt like the price he gave me wasn't right for all the stuff he did. If he does start doing more work, he'll definitely be someone I'd come to first for stuff like this! And yeah I'll be uploading the pic at some point in the near future, just being lazy at the moment.

As for the stuff part of the journal, things are going so-so although inventory is coming up at my job so on top of all the extra work they already put on us, they are expecting even more stuff and sadly I know my supervisor is actually thinking of quitting and getting another job due to how hard they are working us. Hoping they don't try to put me in his position, it's kind of worrisome as most of you guys know I already have an anxiety disorder so this won't help my mental state get any better. I'm also trying to figure out how to reach a lot of the people I used to talk to elsewhere and all that but I got so many that it just feel like a daunting task to do. I hate picking and choosing who to message but if I just hit everyone up then I'll get overwhelemed and isolate myself as that happens often. I know plenty of people want to rp with me but as it stands it's something I seldom do due to how much time and commitment it takes and those who have rp'd with me know I tend to get heavy in the details so it takes a bit for me to reply. Anyhow that's all I wanted to say today though I have noticed that I'm nearly 1k watchers which blows my mind. Might try to do something special for that but not sure yet what to do, well regardless thanks for all the support, even if it's just a favorite or a comment I do appreciate it and I also tend to visit y'alls pages just to see if there is something I like there too!

That's all for now, stay classy everyone~

Might make another video cause I got more clips on my Switch, even did that one village quest where you fight 3 assholes in the arena (Rajang, Magnamalo and Bazelgeese) but yeah been enjoying MH Rise when I do get a chance to play it!

Anyways I been sorta splurging on artwork so there will be more stuff being uploaded real soon and hoping when Dentist gets to me again, I can have 3 more refs sheets to upload before trying to get one final one for Trey and Sozen showing all their abilities and what not (based on a story I may or may not write lol). I think after all of I currently bought and these refs, I'll start getting stuff for all the other characters I have.

My mental state has been ok, feeling better than I was a few months ago but I still lack the motivation to really socialize and just keep to myself. That and my job is draining more so than ever but at least I haven't had any family issues bothering me so that's that. May start looking for that special someone once again, I know if I can find that lady I can cherish and love with all my heart, it would definitely make me feel better though not sure where to start.

Anyways that's it for now, thanks for reading and stay classy everyone~

Been having a blast with Rise and even made a few vids, more to come and I have been doing hub missions a lot so I can try and raise my HR, if you see me online, check to see if I'm doing local or not, I definitely don't mind having friends join me out on the hunts and be sure to have an online session going if you want me to join cause I'll be checking it when I see a friend get on the game!

The teddy bear tenderizer!

Yoruichi's MH Rise Experience (so far)

Will probably make more vids once I get past HR 7 where the difficult monsters are at, currently at HR 6 and it's getting a bit harder but nothing that can cart me heh.

Anyhow updates, a few of you did catch my previous journal about me considering to switching to another artist due to someone who hasn't delivered her promise to me with hundreds of dollars worth of money sent to her for her services (the journal was deleted) and because of the last journal she's blocked me and kept the money so I'll be taking down the few pieces of artwork I did get from her sadly. I can't say I am completely innocent and I could of handled things better but she was ghosting me for a time and it's been literally years for some of the commissioned pieces I had and I got tired of being patient and waiting for it. Anyhow I can't support her and I suggest if you do want an art piece from her, do it when she's streaming, otherwise it's a chance you can end up in her backlog for an unknown amount of time.

It has killed my motivation to really do much when it comes to other stuff online and I really did like her as I've known her for half a decade. Seems like I've been getting backstabbed a lot as of late and just don't feel like socializing much at all now. I'm still debating if I should take another hiatus at the moment or not and if I should continue commissioning art now or not. Even if I do take a dip from really interacting on here or elsewhere, I'll still try and upload any new artwork that I've already commissioned this year when it gets finished.

So yeah, I'm probably going just flat out disappear from the interwebs for a few months while live, breath and eat Monster Hunter! I fell in love with the series back when I played MH4U and this gives me so many similar vibes to it that I'll be packing quite a bit of hours into it, if you too are a hunter than feel free to add me as a friend and I'll be happy to hunt and chill with you there!

SW-4885-2648-6677

Regardless if you are going to get the game or not, if you played any of the games in the franchise, what are your favorite weapons? I'm just curious to know!

As for updates, things are going back to normal or I hope so at least, my sister moved in with our grandma to help take care of her so me and my bro got our apartment back to ourselves and god have I missed the peace and quiet. Can get a decent days sleep and can do whatever without having to baby sit among other things. Also got my final ref sheet in the group of ref sheets  Dentist being completed right now, may post a wip of it some time as it is a character I don't have any previous artwork or info uploaded online for and he is a pretty bad ass poodle~ Also for you guys who love that macro/micro and paw related stuff, I got a rather expensive commission being worked on too so keep your eyes peeled, may even right some smut to go with the picture heh. There are some other commissions I've paid for but not sure when or if they have gotten started on but I should have more artwork to post throughout the year! Hope you all enjoy the submissions and thanks for stopping by. ^^

So now that everything is going alright I can continue getting art and all that jazz so be looking forward to more stuff! I got  Dentist working on some more refs for characters of mine, the current one is of my ol' foxy boi Sozen who currently only have one picture of him in his latest design and the next ref will be the poodle brother to that sassy poodle lady Selena Valentine who I had ordered a ref from  FrozenOver a while ago; just waiting for her to get through her backlog to get to my stuff...not sure when that will be though sadly. Anyways this ref sheet for this poodle character is called Argustus Valentine though I won't say more about him til he has his ref done! Other than that, I got a few other commissions that I have had planned as well~

As for my family and what's going on with the repairs on the house, I haven't really called and talked to my mom and dad in a week but I'm sure they are doing fine. Last I heard they was getting the ceiling repair in my nephew's room and by next week the carpet should be replaced and they'll be getting new furnature and what not. My sis took her family to visit relatives elsewhere for a few days giving me and my bro some rest and quiet but they'll still be here til all the repairs are done at my mom's place so they can move back in.

How I'm feeling now opposed to how I was at the beginning of the year, I'm feeling better but I can't say I've gotten completely over losing one of my best friends like I did, as well as someone I had very intense feelings for. I've continued searching for that special someone that could fill that void in my heart and it's my top priority at the moment but I just don't know how to go about it. I think if I had someone I could get to know intimately, it would drastically help my mood for sure, I'm a hopeless romantic through and through and it's something that occupies my mind 95% of the time if I'm to be honest. It's not that I can't find someone that has exactly what I'm looking but rather having them enjoy and like the same stuff I love and be attracted or at least interested in getting to know me is the issue.

Anyways that's all I wanted to say today, thanks for stopping by to read my journal and stay classy my friends~

So if you've read my previous journal, I had some issues with my debit card and rent was due by the end of the week but everything has been sorted out, transfered the money for the rent to my bro's account and also did a dispute for the charges on my card that obviously wasn't me. Should get the money stolen from me in a few days and my card will arrive by next week.

Now one thing I didn't tell everyone is that I'm currently letting my sister and her family stay in my apartment now due to the damage on my mom's house from that winter storm that hit the US last week. It seems like they'll have to be here for a few weeks which wouldn't be so bad if I could get some damn sleep around here. Having a 1 year old niece and a 6 year old nephew isn't the quietest of company, especially when you have to sleep in the day while they are up in a very tiny and now cramp apartment. That and my nephew wants to play all day when he isn't doing schoolwork which is understandable but I just don't get very much me time now and it just sucks to turn him down since he has very little to do in here other than play on the xbox.

Also aparently I'm considered a mentally disabled person, didn't know Major Depressive Disorder (Clinical Depression) was classified as a disability so that kinda has me bummed out to know.

TLDR: Rent is paid, new debit card is coming, a whole family is now stuck in my apartment so no rest for me and I'm mentally disabled.

I got a text message saying my debit card got compromised today so I gotta go get a new one but it's not that easy for me. Due to Covid fucking shit up I couldn't get my driver's liscense renewed last year and when I did it online, I never receieved the physical card, only have a temporary one in my email address. To get a new debit card you have to present a valid ID which wouldn't be too bad but the temp ID valid anymore as it only is valid through a few months; what also sucks is that rent is due a week or so from now and it usually takes a few weeks for me to get a card if. Not sure if my money is still there cause when I try to check the account it just says the card is declined and I've had issues trying to check the balance online.

Going to go visit the credit union Monday cause it's closed now and won't be open Sunday. I pray they still let me get a new card and it arrives in time for me to pay my rent. Just really irritated right now, it's been almost a year since the last time my card got compromised and I can't figure out how it happens. I don't use it at the gas pumps and I don't go anywhere but work and home and as for online purchases, I only use paypal and only bought artwork using that.

I know I don't go around to everyone's page and say thank you for watching my little corner here on FA but I do appreciate the interest and I do visit every single watcher's page and even who favorites my stuff. Y'all are awesome!

As for the updates, I'll start off with the good stuff. Financially speaking I'm doing way better than I ever have been in the past, actually have commissioned a fair bit of artwork since my last post and will be uploading them real soon; I've also got plans made with one of my favorite artist  dentist to start making ref sheets for not only Trey but for a bunch of characters I haven't introduced to many people, some for personal art and others will be characters for a story I may write in the forseeable future. That and I am aiming to get my own Nintendo Switch (been playing my brother's) and is stoked about Monster Hunter Rise~ If you haven't seen anything of this game then take a gander at this video of what you may expect from it when they finally finish the game!



Now for the not so great news. As those who've been following me for a while, I do have a lot of mental and emotional issues that I've been trying to address for a while now and I haven't made to much headway on them. Also due to some online drama with one of the closest friends I have ever had on here right before New Years, I've been fairly unmotivated to return to socializing like I had in the past and not sure if or when I will ever get 'online' on apps like Discord and the like. I still plan on catching up with a few people for some small chitchatting every blue moon but as far as rp's and stuff are concerned I just don't feel like doing it much any more. Covid19 has also been a concern for me as some fairly close relatives of mine are very sick do to it, already had a cousin rushed to the hospital cause of it though from what I heard he should be able to pull through though I have a few aunts and uncles that are suffering due to the pandemic now and the way it sounds, their condition is worsening.

Anyhow that's all I'll say for now, thanks for dropping by to see what's happening with this crazy ol' dobie boi, will try my best to keep everyone updated. Thanks and stay frosty my friends.

I just binged this on Netflix and DAMN it gave me so much feels and had me on the edge but most importantly the opening is fire!!!

First and foremost, I want to appreciate every single watcher that has watched me recently, I know I'm not online much or very sociable due to issues I'll get into in a bit but I do notice and even poke around my watcher's galleries and eventually fav stuff that catches my interests. Good news is if you watched me cause you like the stuff in my gallery, I still got a folder full of artwork I have yet to post so there will be some stuff to look forward to however I admit I may have over indulged in my kinks and bought a bunch of kinky related artwork so yea, that's that. And I have some gifts that were given to me that aren't necessarily what I'm really into but hey, I'm sure someone out there in my watch list will love it so that stuff will get posted too. Still trying to get over my anxiety and try go reach out to people that did stuff or me in the past but I never properly thanked them or did something in return.

So the update...well for starters I haven't had a chance to get the help I need but a friend told me about calling a helpline anonymously and see where that goes so that maybe my first baby steps to getting my mental health in order. I still did some research on my own and I found this disorder is more than likely the true cause of the problems I've been having among other things but can't know for certain til a professional takes a look at my issues. https://www.mentalhelp.net/blogs/sh.....lity-disorder/

Also yesterday, as much as me and Jamilah have been through and been mated for 2+ years, she finally told me that as much as she loves me, having a family and living with each other will more than likely never happen due to things that has happened in her past. I guess we are just friends now so I'm back to being a single pringle...unsure of if I should really attempt to look for someone else.

TLDR version.
A) MANY THANKS AND ART INCOMING!!! (mostly kinky stuff though, my apologies)
B) Catching up with more people
C) May get help sooner than I think and I may have this https://www.mentalhelp.net/blogs/sh.....lity-disorder/
D) Forever alone q.q

So good news first, I got a crap ton of artwork I plan on uploading since I've been gone for quite some time though me being me, a lot of it will be paw related or macro/micro related so I do apologize in advance and a few pieces aren't really kinks I'm into but was given to me as a gift by a particular friend who likes having a certain doberman nom on his characters for some reason heh. Also I haven't perished yet or contracted that Corvid19 bullshit that's gotten everywhere so I guess that's good news too?

The bad news. I seem to follow a vicious cycle of me trying to get online and converse with all the people I've met only to disappear shortly afterwards and be gone for a while. I found out late last year that I have a severe Anxiety Disorder which would explain my behavior and why I have trouble keeping in touch with people and depression definitely isn't helping either. Unfortunately I don't think my mental health is in a good enough situation to where I can readily talk to everyone so until I can actually get the professional help (and possibly medication) I was talking about getting about a year or so ago, I doubt I'll be up for rp'ing or really chatting much til then. I still have a pile of notes I need to dig through at some point when I can find the motivation to do so and apologize in person for the extremely late replies.

I do have some family issues that's stressing me out too but I'm not the type of person to just share all my problems out in the open nor I do not like burdening others with my troubles. In anycase I appreciate all the support and the influx of watchers I've gotten since my last journal entry. Well that's it for now, y'all take it easy and be safe.

I would go into detail as to why this manga is the bee's knees but this guy does a much more entertaining and better job of doing it~ Been wanting to talk about this to a whole bunch of people but I guess now is better than never! Hell I'm even tempted to get some commissions down the road of the main character, Legosi kinda reminds me of my sona to be honest.

As for the update, I'm finally feeling better and trying to reconnect with a bunch of people both here and on the few social areas I do still have on my computer but I got a whole lot of catching up to do and on here I got like 50 notes just sitting there. I was intending on blowing though all of that at once but I think one of my major problems is I don't pace myself well and bite off more than I can chew getting overwhelmed. Give me some time and I'll be responding to them as well as comments on my artwork I never got a chance to respond to. After I get through the bulk of that I'll start uploading artwork again, got a good 8 piees of artwork or so that hasn't been posted yet and some are some pretty detailed and expensive stuff I commissioned since last October so hope you guys like it when I post! Also got some gift art that will be getting posted as well and I apologies for taking so long to share them with everyone else though I'd appreciate if no one else gifts me anything until I'm able to return the favor.

Anyways that's it for now, thanks for reading and you guys better read that manga or I'mma raid your fridge and sleep on your couch >:V