Just moving that vent after the issue was solved.

Well windows just randomly decided to fuck me over, after a half assed update my user profile is screwed up and I can't access it despite saying I'm logged into it.

So I went and looked up some help to fix things and I likely made things worse and I still cannot access or transfer my bookmarks, passwords, settings and so on.
Fortunately nothing has been deleted but all my desktop stuff is crammed into a folder I have to dig to find and a couple passwords are gone gone due to not writing them down.

I'm not sure what in the update caused this but I'm annoyed as hell and I'm really not sure if I can fix it, the computer says I'm on a temp account while somehow using my real account name.

https://bsky.app/profile/zebbo.bsky.social

That is all

What's the deal with all these old aged white guy furries coming out of the woodworks to brag about their terrible voting choices,
then they want to throw a fit when people call them out on it. It's almost as stupid as nazi furries with them proudly being part of a group that likely wants them dead.

Now there's going to be an even dumber divide in the furry fandom, this is exhausting and it's going to keep happening.
I'm just fed up with the mindset of "It doesn't effect me so it's not even a problem" that so many people have adopted, it just encourages things to get worse.

I really hate politics, the fucking two party system pits people against each other, destroys friendships and even families all while not fixing anything.
Just UGH man....

I've pretty much come to hate doing art, I used to enjoy it but years of pouring my heart into things nobody gave two shits about and almost never improving have convinced me I'm wasting my time.
There's like a thousand better artists out there and I don't have enough going for me, I probably never did.

This isn't some petty "I'm leaving" journal, it's a vent of my frustrations and how much I'm fed up with going in circles.
Maybe I should have never been an artist to begin with, whatever I don't feel anythiing's gonna change anytime soon.

I'm not sure when it's happening but there's going to be some changes in my life, hopefully for the better.

It was a long time coming and I hope I can adjust to it.

I want this to work out, I want this to push me in the right direction.

I don't know what to expect in my life but I need it to be stable.

Good luck or whatever, I'll still be around even if things don't work out.

Literally today, right now


Happening and stuff.

I don't know if I'll be able to finish Apto April, everything decides to shit in my eye at once. Also my sleep schedule went to shit for like the hundreth time, also I kinda do want to do all the day cause like only half of em and interesting ideas. For the record I have made ideas for every single day, I just wanted to do my own things now.

I didn't see shit.

I'm thinking of sharing my discord, but there's a risk of attracting scammers and other such weird folk.
If I do share my discord you HAVE to say you came from FA or I'll default to assuming your a scammer, I don't fall for that stuff.

I'm only suggesting this to get more used to actually using it, feels kind a waste to let it sit and gather dust.

Also anyone who already has me added feel free to message me, I have free time like that but I'm usually the one to start a conversation however.

You know, now that I think about it I've finally figured out one of my biggest artistic fears, making a comic.

I have the characters, the plots and the time but I'm worried about people not finding my ideas as interesting as I do. It'd be easy to ramble on and on about things I made but there is this constant nagging feeling that it just won't connect with people.

So basically due to this I've been stuck in a stalemate for years about this, I'm mainly afraid of failure to be honest.

Well I no longer have internet, all wifi and whatever is gone and may never return.

I tried using the hotspot on my mom's phone but it didn't work, so I tried discord which sent something to my yahoo email......that I cannot access due to verification being linked to a phone that no longer exists.

So really I'm posting this to let you all know that I'm okay kinda, well things haven't been going to well. All this shit happens on Xmas.

I honestly don't know if I'll be fine, family stuff has been crazy.

I need some way to be social before I go insane.

Merry Xmas and happy new years,hope yours is better than mine.

I have no issues for the time being, I have energy so I just need to get back into a good routine.

Right in the middle of watching a video my wi-fi craps out and then says the device is disconnected (Code45)
Any attempts to reinstall drivers have failed, I ran a BIOS scan and it detects my wireless stuff so that narrows it down to a driver issue I cannot fix on my own.

What this means is limited internet access, I'm using by backup laptop right now (which refuses to run discord)

While I can't say I'm one of the targets for these rulings I can however find it rather suspicious that they'd spring something like this "out of the blue"
The situation reeks of FA staff trying to detract attention from an actual problem, one of the staff must have gotten into some trouble and they needed a smokescreen.
Vague assed rulings that can be easily taken out of context and screw over certain art styles.

I only expect incompetence from FA's staff and anyone competent literally gets chased away, I've been prepared for years for their next dumb move.
Well anyways if I've survived FA for this long I'm pretty much not going anywhere.

I can't seem to get better at anything no matter how hard I try.

I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO, I've been going on for the longest time about how twitter is awful for art but nobody listened and went in on mob mentality.
It's always "I'm leaving FA for *other site*" then the other site is fucked in some way then they come right back.

It's going to happen again and again, so just keep your FA handy to fall back on when whatever new website fails, oh and don't thinking tumblr is safe (they still hate porn)

Anyways, back to not doing anything of value.

Not terrible, kinda fun but totally not worth full price. Fuck the bridge I'm getting a refund.

Honestly AI art is like commissioning a REALLY really dumb artist who then charges you extra because of their mistakes,
even worse is you cannot get your OC's and anything other characters you want will be a visual mess (unless their popular enough)

So basically I can't see it replacing actual artists, that ones that say say it will either have little faith in their own abilities or don't really understand art.
While it can be fun to play around with it just doesn't compare to something done by a rreal artist, I personally use generated pics as starting points for my own art.

It's always some tech people coming up with a dumb overly complicated solution to a problem that doesn't exist, I wouldn't be surprised if ai art came to be cause someone didn't want to pay an artist.
To all you artists out there have a bit more faith in yourself cause you ain't gettin replace by some half assed ai "artist" and ai cannot create new ideas, but you can and are thus better.

AI is a replaceable tool, nothing more.

Anyone who draws THAT letter F is a sucker, you fell for the oldest trick in the book. You got horny for a character that's not even worth it, in fact it's hardly a character it's a goddamn letter.
Learn to keep it in your pants everyone, jesus hell you guys have 0% chill with this kind of shit, it's a fucking letter F.

Needed to get rid of that dumb journal, also need to work on the motivation to post anything here.

eeeeehhhhhh

Got nothing much else.

I ain't celebrating this country, there ain't nothing worth celebrating unless your a racist misogynist rich white old guy. And being a living combination of everything they hate this country makes me uncomfortable.

This is not a good era to live in, especially if your on the shit list of the fake religion using a real religion's name.
Things cannot be ignored, it's all bad really really bad. This is coming from someone who normally doesn't talk about politics at all.

Honestly I could use an alternate holiday, hang out with friends day or relax and talk day.

Sometimes I have emotional outbursts due to being forced to bottle them up for so long, sorry

My "dinner" last night was a bottle of wine from a dollar store, I woke up to existential dread (more than usual) and I again struggle with the fact that my family taught me to not cause any sort of conflict.
I was the only one raised like this, EVERYONE else is out spoken and more like an actual person than me and yet my family complains when I can't speak up.

Well you selfish dicks, if you didn't want me to be this way THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE RAISED ME RIGHT!

I hate venting, nobody in my family will give a fuck, they'll never fix things so I just bottle up my problems in hopes that one day it'll all kill me.