This journal has been revised and re-published to better clarify the initial rendition.

This place can officially bite my ass.

It has taken me a while to realize it, but this is NOT a healthy place to be. The people fetishizing death, rape, abuse, pedophilia, and more swarm this place. No rules on what you can post. An "open minded" place to be... but, and sorry if this sounds crazy, I am NOT going to be open minded with those kinds of people. You can disagree as emphatically as you want, but so far the MAJORITY of people I tell "I left FA" to agree and totally can see why. I already know tons of people who left FA due to the cruel, toxic, and generally fucked up community. And frankly, they seem to have no regrets. And I am sure I won't, either.

There are two main reasons why I am leaving this place:

The People

Most people here aren't bad folks. In fact, I hold the firm belief that most people are good. However, there are some people that feel as though the individuation that comes with an online alias is a valid excuse to do some of the heinous actions I have seen committed against others. A LOT of people here are horribly rude to artists, and threaten either the artist or his/herself to get their way. The people here are also addicted to sex and fetishes to an extremely unhealthy extent. Note that I am 100% fine with you getting lewd artwork and posting it. Nothing wrong with that. But if the only artwork you ever want to get is either NSFW or some form of fetish art, then that's often indicative of letting one's libido supersede other aspects of life.

I joined the community for a variety of reasons. To have fun and befriend like minded individuals. To express myself in a fun and unique way. To support the thriving art community. I loved it. When I joined, I had no regrets at all. Then, I heard about FA. Website that most furries use to post art. Seemed okay enough... I didn't see many journal posts, and I didn't know much about the people on here. But the longer I stayed here, the more I began to form a particular disdain for some of the people here. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized how much of a negative influence they have made.

And here I am now. I do not wish to have anything to do with these types of people, and despite trying to avoid them, often run into them by chance.

The Content

Rape, abuse, torture, death... There's a lot of stuff on here that crosses from the "weird but harmless" territory into the "fucked up and harmful" territory. Admittedly, fatal vore is the biggest culprit for me. I have never liked it, but for a long time I was able to tolerate and be friends with those into it. It was a "you do you" scenario... I want to have an open mind wherever I can. But always in the back of my head, I kept feeling it wasn't right. At all. I told myself that they can do whatever. That if they are happy, they aren't hurting anyone, right?

Yeah, not hurting anyone my ass. Allow me to compose a list of three main reasons as to why their "harmless fetish" can and does cause real, serious harm:

- Trauma. From misleading comics and thumbnails to horrific post descriptions, not to mention the swarm of comments. The vast majority of people here post fatal without warnings in the thumbnails or titles. Since there's no blacklist feature, failing to place those warnings will cause people to see things they really do not want to see, and you are entirely at fault for that.

To those that actually DO put very clear warnings on your work, congrats. You have managed to counter this point. But to the majority who don't, you are fucking people up bad. Do you care? I'd hope you would. But chances are you will tell yourself you are not seriously fucking up people's minds to cope with the idea of it, or find some way to mentally justify the harm you do. But you still are doing harm. Harm to me, harm to my close friends, and harm to MANY others, I can promise you that. And if you have the whole "not my problem" mindset, you are entitled to that belief. But I want nothing to do with you, as that is a cold, cruel way to live.

- Mental health. This is best explained by connecting it to fatal vore (in which, if a prey is digested, he is never revived). If, in roleplay, in your mind, or obviously in real life, you at all enjoy fatal vore more than safe or reformation, you are more than likely to have underlying health concerns. For the prey, if you believe that giving your life to someone for the sake of their pleasure is a healthy mindset, it is not. I know you wouldn't do this in real life... at least, I'd hope not. But the fact you get off to this idea is NOT healthy. In fact, I have had a friend who is into vore do fatal for self harm. He admitted publicly to it. So even if your roleplay partner seems to like it, you could very well be inching them closer to suicide, as was the case with my friend. Plus, inversely, if you feel that claiming someone's life is justifiable for pleasure, that, too, is messed up. Yes, even just in belief. Having such little regard for sentient beings is horrible. And to those who do it for it to be more "realistic", that is a HORRIBLE excuse. You're essentially saying that you like it if it's more true to life... yet, you say doing it irl would be horrible. But if your goal is to make it feel like it's actually happening... it doesn't add up. If you prioritize sexual pleasures over life in roleplay, even if that doesn't carry over to real life, it raises serious questions about your morality and motives.

- Desensitization. Similar to mental health, but can occur even without mental health concerns. The more you fetishize such atrocious things, the less you begin to see them as bad. NOBODY can gain pleasure from something they genuinely feel is a horrible thing to do. Therefore, the only time someone would gain pleasure from such an action (or, rather, the idea of or media depicting said action) is if they didn't genuinely feel it is a horrible thing to do. Again, these people claim that it's totally different in real life... yeah, it is. It's much worse. But if you gain pleasure from the idea of it, the only thing stopping you, therefore, is the fear of punishment from society, no matter what you try to tell yourself. By seeing these things published, coupled with comments about how lucky the murderer, rapist, etc. is, how "hot" the scene is, and effectively dehumanizing or ignoring the victim, it really fucks you up. And I see that EVERYWHERE on here... I do not want to be in a part of any community where it's commonplace to see people sexualize such content and treating it like it's nothing but something to jerk off to. Guess what-- rape is not a fetish. It's a crime. A horrible, cruel, and permanently harmful crime.


There are more case-by-case reasons I could go over, but I'd be here all night if I did. If these points didn't even stop to make you think at all, then finish reading. If you're still adamantly against me on this, then please click off this journal and forget I even exist, for both our sake.

Otherwise, if someone on the fence about fatal versus nonfatal (or the nature of this debate in general) is considering these points, it would be, in my eyes, one of the most respectable choices you could make to try to reduce this problem, or at least not feed into it. The furry community needs more people like you... who value the benevolence of others more than the sexual pleasure of yourself.

That's why I joined. I thought everyone, or at least most, people in the community were like that. On FurAffinity, though, that seems to be an exception. If I am to use this site again, it would need massive reform on what is and is not allowed.

But for now, I'm leaving. To those that watch me, you can message me on Telegram, Discord, or Instagram. I use a different account that I barely want connected to this one, but I also want to leave a chance for people to contact me that are not part of the problem here on FA (which I like to believe most people aren't). As much I try to avoid these people and the stuff they publish everywhere, I just can't seem to get away. It's become too commonplace here for me to stand.

To those of you that are the good ones here, I'll miss you, and I am sorry for abandoning this place. But this is what I need to do for my own sanity. The amount of overwhelming anxiety, depression, and even legitimate trauma caused by the things people post here is not at all worth staying. If at any moment I can see something like what I had described even while trying to avoid it, and subsequently be rendered incapacitated with strong symptoms of PTSD (no, I am not using that term lightly. The only time I'd ever say that I have a condition is if I legitimately have it)... That is not at all worth the pain this place has brought me and many I hold dear.

To those of you that are contributing to the problem, I am not mad at you. But I sure as hell wish you'd open your eyes to the harm you are, in fact, causing, and at least make an attempt to stop that harm.

Contact info (Obviously, messaging me with any malicious intent will result in an immediate block. I won't even read what you say-- I've had enough justifying myself to you people. Only contact if you want to keep up with artwork of my characters and with my posts overall, or even if you just want to talk. You should know who I will and will not talk to at this point... so long as you aren't messaging to fight me on this, I'll be happy to lend an ear) -

Discord: CodeStoat#2576
Telegram & Twitter: @CodeStoat
Instagram: PM me for info