Hi! Fair warning that this one will be a little more serious and unhappy

Some happiness to start with, so that this journal isn't just me crying into the void: I met a new friend, she's really sweet and we like to play video games together late into the night. We laugh so hard and it always makes the hard days easier <3

Halloween came and went and I never put together the costume I wanted to show off here, maybe next year? Things have been so hectic lately I totally forgot to get anything I needed to make the costume

Moving on to the hard part of the check-in:
My partner left me near the end of last month. I'm still upset over it and I wish it hadn't ended so suddenly, I saw it coming, it seems like my relationships always end up the same way & that's a big reason I stopped dating initially. I thought maybe it would be different, & maybe I would be ready to try again now that I'm an adult in my 20s but things aren't too much different I guess, lol

I also look at dead/abandoned accounts a lot lately, either on here or on another social media site or on YouTube, and it makes me feel sad even if it's someone I don't follow. I feel so tempted to comment how I wish they would return, just leave a message on their page that someone is thinking of them & someone misses them, even if we don't even know each other & they probably won't ever read what I write. One of my biggest fears is being forgotten, if I were to vanish from here someday for some reason I don't want my account to just sit with nobody to appreciate it or think of me, and I don't want that to happen to others either.

I hope that I can see a light at the end of the tunnel soon, because I need it a lot right now