I don't really know how many from my past remember me or even spare a nano second of thought on my existence anymore at this point, but I figured I might as well say sorry for being as quiet and distanced as I have been these last several years


I know it's mostly my fault, I think I've grown alienated from the whole concept of friendship at this point since it mostly led to nothing but pain and misery for me.

I tried to juggle many things in life and tried to maintain some level of connection with the ones I cared for the most....the more I tried the more I failed and felt pain

After attempting to end things a few times I basically gave up being social, honestly I don't know how I'm still here alive right now

To be blunt it's more than likely I will be gone from this world pretty soon, my future is pretty
bleak and I just don't have the mental strength to go through it

So I made this journal to basically say sorry to the ones that may have actually cared for me
in some way in the past and attempted some kind of friendship, I turned out to be a massive disappointment and a waste of your time socially


....anyway...not sure why I wanted to get that off my chest, I will stop now