Last year has been... interesting. I finally recognized that my relationship with alcohol is not just a little overt, it's a huge fucking problem and I went to outpatient rehab where I just basically had to go get my booze-makes-you-puke-now meds in person every day and talk about life and shit. Then summer was... actually, I don't remember. I don't remember anything about summer, not even if it was hot or rainy. But during that summer I was gradually weaned out of my meds bc it apparently was worth seeing is I could now live without them, since I wasn't drinking anymore. Could be why I don't remember anything bc the side effects of not taking those meds were always messing with my head really bad.

In autumn I started in school again, for arts and crafts this time, aiming to become a teacher. There's a lot of making stuff and some pedagogic stuff, but also product design and practical things aiming to sell our own stuff bc in 2021 we all understand that in this life path there is not once single income stream but many small ones and we can't just 100% focus on teaching us to teach others. Anyways as time moved forward toward the change of the year, my body started to break down, bit by bit. I was kinda panicking bc I make things with my hand and that couldn't be happening. But it turns out it might have all been psychosomatic bc my christmas break ended up in a breakdown and small medical leave bc the depression and anxiety was back, full force. I just couldn't force myself to function anymore.

I talked with my teacher and slowly got back to school life during January and February. I'm now doing full weeks again but not always full days. My body seems... fine-ish. There's a slight problem with my hands, some shaking and weakness, but it's probably something to do with my medications. I also got one beast of insomnia and mega brain fog, that are getting better by shuffling the meds again. It's a process.

I've also been drawing a bit more. Not any OC related stuff, that is too much for me, I think. But illustrations of random things in my head, not related to anything bigger. It's why I've been checking FurAffinity again, too. I think I might get some furry stuff out of me. I've been practicing anatomy and figure drawing and making those figures furry has always made the practice more fun. So no one be surprised if I upload something this year :D

Anyways, I'm still kicking, I'm still trying.