Welcome to [ISP], this is Anon, how may I help you?

"Mah innanets be trippin'"

That hits so close to home

*Customer is rebooting modem, hear a woman yelling at him*

Everything ok?

"Yeah, that just mah sistuh, MAN SHE ON CRACK!"

Ive had the husband yelling at the wife on the phone and im like "maybe let him talk on the phone instead"

How about the fat man from Kentucky, in whom you could HEAR the arteries clogging, blaming us for his pending heart attack? Included on the account was a novel's worth of notes in one of the tickets and he said the same thing to me written in the notes (was a few years ago): "I'll take this all the way to the White House but he won't do anything because he's black."

lmao jesus christ. if only the white house cared about such trivial matters.

...

This is extremely cute.

... *you're* extremely cute.

I just went through all of your Tales series and I related to all of them to the point of tears

Fellow call center rep? *High fives!*

*le five*

Today I had a problem just trying to help this man figure out what the backspace key was on his keyboard. It hurt to describe the key to him and still have him say there was no such key on his keyboard until about 20 minutes later when he said "Oh, it actually says backspace on it."

Real pain

you'll like this one then:

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/28340367/

The horrible thing is we have an app, and sometimes you gotta help them get to it in the first place while in a call.

"Tap the home button"

"Where's the home button?"

"There is a single button on your phone, at the bottom, that ISN'T part of the screen. Hit that button."

"Oh, I think I found-" *call dropped*

*sigh* *call back*

"That button hung up the call!"

"Did you press the red button ON THE SCREEN?"

"Of course I did, that's the home button isn't it?"

*kills self*

As soon as the call connects their brain turns off.

Just did the whole series, never worked IT but sold cellphones for years, most of these hit so close to home though.

Happened to me at the phone shop:

Me: "Your plan gives you unlimited calls, Ma'am." (Was a few years ago, they had just started those.)

Lady customer: "How much is unlimited? How many hours do I have?"

Me: *Brain freezes.* "... It's unlimited. Infinite. There's no hours."

Lady: "But what if I go beyond? I'll get charged!"

Me: "You can't go beyond, Ma'am, because it's unlimited calls. There's no limit, you can call all day without being overcharged."

Lady: "But what if I do, how many hours can I call before being charged?"

Me: "Ma'am, with your plan, you can call anyone in the country for 24 hours every day without being overcharged."

Lady: "But what if I go beyond?"

Me: "Ma'am, if you manage to call more than 24 hours in one day, come back to let me know."

I never saw her again, and I wonder if she ever realized the stupidity of her questions...

LOL if you manage to call more than 24 hours in one day.

It did the trick though and she left the shop. Then I thought that, technically, for one day every year, due to DST, she can technically call 25 hours in one day. Still won't get charged though, unlimited plan and all that...

Shame you don't work across the street from a library, otherwise you could've been like, "Hang on a moment," and headed over to the library. Return five minutes later with a dictionary, and then just point at the word "unlimited."

I'm not sure it would have helped... but I'll keep the diea in mind and get the definition of the word online next time. *Bookmarks dictionaries online*

Stupid is a difficult thing to fix, especially in these times. Then again, if somebody doesn't know what unlimited means, then they probably need their phone to do everything for them. Either that, or they're obsessively paranoid about fine print.

More and more people now wants to have everything done for them, especially when they're paying, even as little as 10€ or 20€. So, it's not that they're really stupid, they just don't want to make any effort.

I'd be sitting on a mountain of money if I got 1€ everyt ime someone told me 'but I pay you so you have to do it for me!'... *sighs*

Not wanting to make any effort is the first stepping stone to stupidity however, as it robs one of experiences to expand their knowledge and skills.

I wholly agree.