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Birthdays and weird feelings...
a week ago
Well, I'm older today. I know it's not the best habit, but does anyone else kinda' look at your birthday as another step towards the grave? I know it's a pretty downer attitude, but I just wanna know I'm not alone in the morbidity.
I hope I can light up the dark room by bringing you some candles for your special homemade cake chef.
Personally I don't believe in the known phrase, as I believe a birthday is a reference point of an era, while the grave is just a tiny speck not worth worrying about, or to consider death as a significant part of my life. (quality of life and health are far more important to maintain than to think about death.)
Reason might be long but here's why I believe so:
I believe in perpetual existence. as the lack of consciousness impossible because death would need to be observed by conscious which is impossible. It only make sense to fear death as if you are going to sleep in the grave forever, which I don't find possible. and if death is a very, very low state of consciousness you would barely have an opinion of this consciousness and proportionally, your living life would completely diminish the existence of death to a tiny speck, leaving death to barely being noticeable. leaving the vast majority of your existence as a living being. (Who knows maybe death might be found as some crazy blackhole system where the colapse of consciousness causes crazy dream worlds. lolidk.)
If I have to go full on secular, Your brain, if gone, wouldn't be able to perceive and rationalize death. So I feel like life is either some weird surreal experience after you die, or that the grave is just a tiny spec of time before the vhs playing your life rewinds the tape of your life again or you're reincarnated.
I do hope you can enjoy your birthday.
It's good to plan ahead but ultimately things are so unpredictable in life, and by experience, so much things I've planed never come exactly as expected so be it with good or bad outcome. (As in even if I get a good result, It's always a different experience than expected.) Thus why I don't think much about the future and enjoy the known present and just try my best to keep on working on uplifting my life.
Best wishes also. Feel free to ping me if ya ever wanna talk about anything.