Wow, this honestly took some time. It's been 7 months. Longest waiting gap between a 100 milestone, and only SECOND milestone this year. And big thanks to some community support, as I kept writing about it on Twitter and Bluesky. Very thankful for that.

Soooo much happened since May. For start, I lost another 2 friends. Ones I considered the closest to me. And as always, it was related to my B-Day. How is it possible that people I don't even know exist, have congratulated me, but friends I considered the closest have literally ignored me, like I never existed. And I turned 30! One of them has done this 3rd time in a row, and has lied to me about "trying to make it up" for forgetting. Or rather, forgot about making up for forgetting. And only a few weeks ago, I noticed they did NOT forget about someone else's b-day. So yea, I've had enough. And just to make it clear, my b-day is just the tip of the iceberg. I don't lose friends in one day. It has always been long term problem with them ignoring me. Either their responses take long, they are empty, or I feel like I'm just a paperweight for them. Anyway, if someone forgets about b-day once, let alone 3 times, it's one of the strongest signs I'm not important to them. And I tried, I really tried patching things up, but it seems it NEVER works. This has failed with at least 3 people now. I'm tired of losing people I considered friends. I'm clearly in crisis, and not entirely by my fault. If they don't see me as I see them, it hurts. Very. Feels like they've been stringing me along. I refuse to write them/talk to them anymore. I have one last true friend. If I lose that one too, I am lost forever... 💔💔💔

On more news, I made huge progress on my secret dragon model. I am currently finishing the "adding controllers to the rig" part, and very soon, I'll start weight painting and finish this lady. My estimate? Done either in January of February. I'm more leaning towards the latter.

Another stuff, still fighting the pain in abdomen. January may be very important, when I may have chance. I really really hope. It's been over 3 years now.

Let me tell you, it's really REALLY not easy for me. It may look like I'm doing well, but I don't think so. The income is not good enough, I keep losing friends I considered friends and I'm still in pain. One of the last chances I have is launching Patreon, but I still haven't done enough content for that. I have an animation in plan, but I'll only work on it when I finish this model. And hopefully, that makes some good income as well. Over a year of work. And a pretty complicated rig.

Long journal, I see. I mean, 7 months. Really really hope the next one will come much sooner. I know I have to make content, but not only I have a lot of work with model, but I lose motivation when I don't really see point in making content. It's like I'm losing breathe.