I have a very strange commish and I need someone who thinks they can do this job and then tell me how much it'll cost

I'm looking for someone to draw jesus christ jackhammering mickey mouse in the doo doo hole with a lawndart as garth brookes gives birth to something resembling a chedder cheese log with almonds on santa cluases tummy tum.

no I didn't think this up and yes it's from a song
title: A lap dance is so much better when the stripper is crying
band: Bloodhound gang
album: I don't really remember